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Day 11 Assignments
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Jean’s Scene Requirements
What I learned doing this assignment is that using the two-step passes helped flesh my scenes out.
TEASER
Start: A gangly teen Benjamin Franklin locks the printshop while Tanner watches.
Challenging Situation: Two ruffians rob Ben
Conflict: Tanner tries to look conspicuous but wants to help Ben
Action: Tanner catches up and takes out the ruffians
Finish: Ben thanks Tanner but Tanner disappears.
EXT. Colonial Philadelphia Street – Day
A gangly teen Benjamin Franklin locks the printshop.
EXT. Narrow Alleyway – Continuous
Tanner dressed in Colonial wear spots Ben, his target. Ben leaves the shop whistling. Tanner goes to cross the street, gets stopped by buggies, loses track of Ben.
EXT. Street – Continuous
Two mean-looking men spy Ben’s satchel – easy pickings – and drag Ben into a narrow alleyway to kill him.
EXT. Alleyway – Day
Tanner takes out both men. It’s not Ben’s day to die. Tanner quotes a saying by an older Ben and vanishes, leaving a confused Ben behind.
ACT 1
Start: Sharra is distracted thinking about her future
Challenging Situation: She collides with Lazarus. It’s brief.
Conflict: He apologizes, pickpockets her keys
Action: Lazarus cross paths with Tanner, hand him the keys
Finish: points Sharra out as she enters the building
EXT. Manhattan Street Financial Building – Day
Sharra listens to a father and a teenager discuss his future, then a professional couple meeting for the first time. She wonders about chance versus destiny. Not watching her path, she collides with Lazarus. He quickly apologizes while pickpocketing her keys, dropping his pocket watch inside her pocket. Further down, Lazarus gives Tanner the keys and points out Sharra as she enters the office building.
Start: At her desk, Sharra finds the watch in her pocket. She reads the inscription. Notices the time and hurries to the conference room.
Challenging Situation: The staff is gathered. Sharra slips in. Robert Reads is praising a staff member; someone is up for promotion. Sharra thinks it’s her. She blushes under the praise.
Conflict: The promotion goes to an underling!
Action: Sharra leaves in a huff. J.D Dash follows her.
Finish: She’s back at her desk, looking for another job where she will be appreciated.
INT. Finance Office – Day
Sharra is at her desk. Finds the watch in her coat pocket. Reads the inscription on the back. Notices the time. Oops! She is late and hurries off for…
INT. Conference Room – Day
The room is full of staff. J.D. Dash smiles at her. She smiles and gives him a little wave. One of the boss’, Robert Read lists the qualities of the person up for promotion. Sharra slips inside. Sharra smiles, embarrassed at the praise, holding back her excitement; she thinks it’s her. Read announces another staff member. Sharra can’t believe it and leaves in a huff. Dash follows her out.
INT. Finance Office – Day
Sharra is on the computer, searching for a new career, something with adventure where she will be appreciated. She feels robbed. Dash offers his condolences, notices the watch, recognizes the miniature inside, grows wary. Sharra notices, but Dash distracts her with an offer to look around for another position for her.
Start: Tanner slips into Sharra’s apartment. Looks around
Challenging Situation: Notices her meager belongings.
Conflict: One family photo. He realizes she has no roots – is alone.
Action: He places a camera bug behind a family photo.
Finish: He slips out.
INT. Sharra’s Apartment – Day
The lock clicks. The door opens and Tanner slips in. He scopes out the room – one family photo, a faded quilt, a few time-travel novels, plants – a lonely existence. He sighs and shakes his head. He hides a camera bug behind the picture and slips out, quietly shutting the door behind him.
Start: It’s that 5 o’clock foot traffic. Sharra leaves the building along with other workers.
Challenging Situation: She sees a hot guy staring at her. It’s Tanner. She loses her composure and drops some papers. Tanner rushes over to help.
Conflict: Tanner slips her keys back into her purse. Notices the papers are job applications. Bad day.
Action: Destiny. He gives her a Vault Agency business card. He’s the second person offering her a job. He saunters off. She watches him puzzled. Then looks at the card.
Finish: It shimmers. Sharra is drawn to it. Touches it. It zaps her. It’s weird.
EXT. Financial Building – Day
It’s that 5 o’clock foot traffic. Sharra leaves the building along with other workers. She sees a hot guy staring at her – Tanner – loses her composure and drops some papers. Tanner rushes over to help. Tanner slips her keys back into her purse. Notices the papers are job applications. Bad day. His company is looking for someone, gives her a Vault Agency business card. He’s the second person offering her a job. The logo is the same as Tanner’s tattoo. Tanner disappears into the crowd of pedestrians. The logo shimmers. Sharra is drawn to it. Touches it. It zaps her. It’s weird.
Start: Sharra enters. Puts her satchel on the couch.
Challenging Situation: Her eyes fall on the photo. her parents, a younger her and her brother.
Conflict: She adjusts the photo, looks at it with sadness. Touches her mom. She doesn’t notice the camera.
Action: She removes the business card from her coat pocket. It zaps her like the first time. It makes her curious. She opens her laptop, googles Vault Agency. The website comes up.
Finish: She dials the agency’s phone number.
INT. Sharra’s apartment – Day
Sharra enters, shuts the door, and throws her satchel on the couch. Her eyes land on the photo. It’s out of place. She adjusts it, almost touching the camera, but pauses to look at it. It’s her parents, a younger her and her brother. She touches her mom. Moves away. Then, remembers the business card. She removes it from her coat pocket. It zaps her like the first time. It makes her curious. She opens her laptop, googles Vault Agency, comes up with a website. Looks Interesting. She dials the agency’s phone number.
Start: Faolan comes home from a night out. His butler, Mr Hobbs, meets him at the door, takes his top hat and cane. Notices the blood on Faolan’s cuff.
Challenging Situation: Faolan moves stiffly up the stairs, dismissing his concerned butler.
Conflict: In his bedroom, Faolan opens his dress coat. His left side is soaked – blood! The housekeeper, Mrs Hobbs, arrives with water and fresh linens. She knows but is discrete and leaves.
Action: Faolan removes a suitcase buried in his armoure and sets it on the bed. Snaps it opened. Pauses. Grim. Whatever is inside can’t be good.
Finish: He lifts out a black uniform jacket. Totally not 1825. He turns it. The Vault logo is imprinted on the chest and arm.
INT. Faolan’s Townhouse Foyer – Night
It’s London 1825. Faolan enters and is met by his butler, Mr Hobbs. Faolan’s clothes speak of a night out on the town. Faolan removes his top hat, grimaces in pain, and gives it and his cane to Hobbs. Hobbs notices blood on Faolan’s cuff. Faolan moves stiffly up the stairs, dismissing his concerned butler.
INT. Faolan’s Bedroom – Night
Faolan drops the ‘nothing’s wrong’ act. He opens his coat – his shirt is soaked – blood! He reveals a stab wound on his side. The housekeeper, Mrs. Hobbs, arrives with water and bandages, from Mr. Hobbs. After she leaves, Faolan removes a suitcase buried in his armoure and sets it on the bed. Snaps it opened. Pauses. Grim. Whatever is inside can’t be good. He lifts out a black uniform jacket. Totally not 1825. He turns it. The Vault logo is imprinted on the chest and arm.
Start: Sharra gets out of a taxi and heads to the front door of the impressive building
Challenging Situation: Tanner, off to the side, watches Sharra.
Conflict: doesn’t want Sharra to see him.
Action: He touches a hidden metal device attached to his tattoo and links with Lazarus, informing him the target is on her way.
Finish: He follows Sharra at a discreet distance.
ACT 2
EXT. Manhattan – Office Building – Day
Sharra steps out of a taxi and heads to the door of the impressive building, a bit intimidated. Tanner, hiding behind a cup of coffee off to the side, watches her. He touches a hidden metal device attached to his tattoo and links with Lazarus, informing him the target is on her way. He throws his cup in the trash and follows Sharra from a discreet distance.
INT. Office Building Reception Area – Day
The reception points Sharra to the West Wing. She heads down the corridor. The second elevator opens. Tanner gets out and follows, staying back.
INT. West Wing – Day
Sharra stops at Vault Agency’s door. She looks back. Tanner quickly sits, holding a magazine up to hide his face. Sharra’s finger brushes the logo on the card and gets zapped again. Blames it on static. She is nervous. Big breath, then knocks.
Start: The office is elegant and masculine. Bejeweled ancient weaponry are on display in glass columns. Sharra can’t help but gawk. Tanner sneaks inside, hides, and listens.
Challenging Situation: The Head Director is the man who bumped into her, Lazarus Maitland. She thinks it’s luck and gives him his watch back. It breaks the awkwardness of the moment.
Conflict: Lazarus gets down to business, gives her a Vault contract. He lists her qualities from a file. She doesn’t feel she qualifies
Action: Lazarus tries to persuade her. Gives her the weekend to think about it.
Finish: Sharra leaves with the contract but gives no promises.
INT. Executive Suite – Day
Sharra enters. The office is elegant and masculine. Bejeweled ancient weaponry are on display in glass columns. Sharra can’t help but gawk. Sharra recognizes Lazarus as the man who she bumped into. She thinks it’s luck and gives him his watch back. He’s grateful. It breaks the awkwardness. Lazarus gets down to business, gives her a Vault contract. He lists her qualities from a file. Lazarus mentions Grayson. She flinches at the name. She hasn’t seen him in years. He promises adventure, interesting places and people, stimulating work, a place she can use her perfect memory ability to the fullest. She isn’t convinced it’s for her, doesn’t think she qualifies, yet agrees to take the weekend to think about it.
INT. West Wing – Continuous
Sharra remembers the card, but it’s too late. The door is shut. She shakes her head and moves down the hallway
Start: Tanner meets Lazarus at the minibar.
Challenging Situation: Tanner doesn’t think Sharra makes a good candidate for the Agency
Conflict: Lazarus disagrees, knowing differently.
Action: Lazarus reminds Tanner what his job is. Tanner isn’t happy about it.
Finish: Tanner is sent to get things ready.
INT. Executive Suite – Day
Tanner meets Lazarus at the minibar. Lazarus pours a whiskey for himself. Tanner agrees with Sharra – she’s not a good candidate for the Agency, pointing out her nice-girl-next-door feel. Lazarus disagrees, knowing differently, pointing out that none of them were in the beginning. Lazarus reminds Tanner what his job is. Tanner isn’t happy about it.
Start: Sharra works on her computer. An email pops up from her boss.
Challenging Situation: She reads it, realizing that it wasn’t meant for her, but opens the attached file labeled: retirement funds.
Conflict: She quickly realizes the spreadsheet of figures is evidence that her boss is embezzling clients’ money. She’s shocked. She hears her boss’s voice. He’s coming her way.
Action: She finds a USB stick and with nervous fingers gets it into the slot. Reads stops to chat with an employee. Sharra copies the file willing it to hurry and finish. Reads is at her desk. She gets up and blocks his view, sliding a piece of paper over the USB stick.
Finish: He notices her odd behavior but dismisses it and moves on. The file finishes loading. She gets out of the email and removes the USB stick.
INT. Financial Office – Day
Sharra works on her computer. An email pops up from her boss. She reads it, realizing that it wasn’t meant for her, but opens the attached file labeled: retirement funds. She quickly realizes the spreadsheet of figures is evidence that her boss is embezzling millions. She’s shocked. She hears her boss’s voice. He’s coming her way. She finds a USB stick and with nervous fingers gets it into the slot. Reads stops to chat with an employee. Sharra copies the file willing it to hurry and finish. Reads is at her desk. She gets up with her coffee mug and blocks his view, discreetly sliding a piece of paper over the USB stick. He notices her odd behavior but dismisses it and moves on. The file finishes loading. She gets out of the email and removes the USB stick.
INT. Vault Main Corridor – Day
A distressed Tanner rushes to Cam. It’s Sharra. She’s hurt. He’s upset, blames himself. Blames the Vault. They hear a hum through the wall. Someone has returned.
Start: Faolan hides, listening.
Challenging Situation: He waits for them to turn and then slips across the hallway to the Terminex.
Conflict: He steals a Comlink from a duffle bag. At a terminal, a headshot of Lazarus comes up. Faolan pauses on it. Resentment flashes across his face before he moves on.
Action: He swipes up the recruit applicant files. Gets Sharra’s recruitment location, date, and pivotal point. Overrides the Comlink program, activating his personal computer, Ailbe.
Finish: She missed him. Has Ailbe transfer Sharra’s file to the unit with a promise of a new mission. He swipes the terminal off and slips back across the hallway.
INT. Vault Chamber – Continuous
Faolan, in a Vault uniform, is pressed against the arch entrance, listening. The hum comes from behind him. Electrical – alive – alien. He peeks out. Spots Tanner and Cam. He waits for them to turn and then slips across the corridor.
INT. Terminex – Continuous
Faolan steels a Com-Link from a duffle bag. Gets onto one of the futuristic terminals and activates the screen. Works it like a pro – a headshot of Lazarus comes up. Faolan pauses on it. Resentment flashes across his face before he moves on. He swipes up the recruit applicant files. Onto Sharra’s. He recognizes her. Gets Sharra’s recruitment location, date, and pivotal point. He overrides the Com-link, activating his personal computer program, Ailbe. She missed him. Has Ailbe transfer Sharra’s file to the unit with a promise of a new mission. He swipes the terminal off.
INT. Main Corridor – Continuous
All clear. Faolan hurries across and disappears through the marble archway. A strange hum returns, grows louder. A flash of light. Then darkness. The hum slows.
Start: Sharra studies the Vault contract.
Challenging Situation: Something about it doesn’t seem right. She gets on her laptop and does a deeper google search, Lazarus Maitland. Comes up with a name from the 1700s but no photo.
Conflict: She looks at the USB stick and makes a decision.
Action: On her cell phone, she calls Dash,
Finish: She needs some advice. They agree to meet.
INT. Sharra’s apartment – Day
Sharra looks over the Vault contract. Something about it doesn’t seem right. She gets on her laptop and does a deeper google search, Lazarus Maitland. Comes up with a name from the 1700s but no photo. She puts the contract away. It’s a no. She looks at the USB stick and picks up her cell phone, calls Dash. She needs some advice.
Start: Dash holds Sharra’s seat out for her. A gentleman. They order drinks.
Challenging Situation: He thinks it’s a date…
Conflict: …until Sharra gets down to business, re: the embezzlement, and is looking for help. She’s afraid of Read and what he will do to her.
Action: Dash is quick to tell her about an opening in Chicago. He’ll arrange everything.
Finish: Sharra is grateful. She has to do something first and leaves.
INT. Restaurant – Day
Dash holds Sharra’s seat out for her. A gentleman. They order drinks. He thinks it’s a date… until Sharra gets down to business, re: the embezzlement, and is looking for help. She’s afraid of Read and what he will do to her. Dash is quick to tell her about an opening in Chicago. He’ll arrange everything. Sharra is grateful. She has to do something first and leaves. Dash smirks.
EXT. Manhattan Battery Park – Seaglass Carousel – Night
A generic amusement park song plays. Children and parents enjoy the carousel ride. A strange vacuum disturbs the air nearby. Faolan magically appears. He drops to a crouch. No one notices him. He stands. Ailbe informs him the target is ten minutes away. He starts to run in that direction.
Start: The taxi leaves. Sharra checks the mace can in her pocket. Satchel over her shoulder, she heads to the door.
Challenging Situation: Out of nowhere, a dark form hits her, knocking her off balance, and grabs the satchel. She comes face to face with Jerad Conway. No time for mace.
Conflict: Sharra runs to the door, but Jerad jerks her back by the strap of the satchel.
Action: He stabs her, rips off the satchel, and races to the side of the building.
Finish: Sharra is left gasping.
EXT. Vault Office Building – Night
The taxi leaves. Sharra checks the mace can in her pocket. Satchel over her shoulder, she heads to the door. Out of nowhere, a dark form hits her, knocking her off balance, and grabs the satchel. She comes face to face with Jerad Conway. No time for mace. Sharra runs to the door, but Jerad jerks her back by the strap of the satchel. He stabs her, giving her a message to desist, and rips off the satchel, and takes off. Sharra is left gasping.
ACT 3
EXT. Office Building – Side Courtyard – Night
Faolan jogs from the back street. He hears Sharra yelling and ducks behind a cement partition.
EXT. Office Building – Front – Continuous
Sharra is up and stumbling after the mugger. She loses a shoe Desperate – re: the contract. Jerad is at the edge of the building and disappears around the corner. Sharra throws off the other shoe and sprints after Jerad.
Start: Jerad looks back and smiles. Big mistake.
Challenging Situation: Faolan leaps out, overpowers Jerad, pressing a PEN to his neck. Jerad goes limp. Faolan drags him to the partition, ducking as Sharra appears.
Conflict: She touches her side. There is blood on her hands. Faolan is torn, he wants to go to her but holds back. She turns around and disappears around the corner.
Action: He asks Ailbe about the injury. There is no record of it. He finds a note and a snapshot of Sharra on Jerad. He checks behind Jerad’s left ear. No tattoo. He snaps a photo of Jerad’s license.
Finish: Faolan hales a taxi and gets inside.
EXT. Office Building – Side Courtyard – Night
Jerad looks back and smiles. Big mistake. Faolan leaps out, overpowers Jerad, pressing a PEN to his neck. Jerad goes limp. Faolan drags him to the partition, ducking as Sharra appears. She touches her side. There is blood on her hands. Faolan grows alarmed, he wants to go to her but holds back. She turns around and disappears around the corner. He asks Ailbe about the injury. There is no record of it. Faolan checks behind the mugger’s ear – no tattoo. Finds a note, someone hired him. He gets the mugger’s address from his license, takes a wad of money out, and Sharra’s satchel. He heads to the front, but a loved-up couple block his way. He turns around…
EXT. Office Building – Back Street – continuous
…and hails a taxi. It pulls up and he hops in. The taxi drives away.
EXT. Office Building – Front – Night
Still holding her side, Sharra picks up her discarded shoes, grimacing.
INT. Elevator – Night
Sharra leans back against the wall. Looks at her bloody hand. It trembles. She opens her coat. So much blood! Panic! Her hand goes back over the wound. She makes an effort to calm down. The elevator dings. She takes a deep breath and stumbles out.
Start: Lazarus opens the door and catches Sharra as she passes out.
Challenging Situation: He lays her on the couch and Links Tanner
Conflict: Tanner jokes about recruitment trouble already not realizing Lazarus is serious.
Action: Lazarus tells him to bring Cam and a med-kit and a woman’s white dress shirt.
Finish: Lazarus lifts the compress, checks the wound, and presses the compress back down.
INT. Executive Suite – Night
Lazarus opens the door and catches Sharra as she passes out. He lays her on the couch and Links Tanner. Tanner jokes about recruitment trouble already not realizing Lazarus is serious. Lazarus tells him to bring Cam and a med-kit and a woman’s white dress shirt. Lazarus lifts the compress, checks the wound, and presses the compress back down.
Start: Tanner burst in with Cam.
Challenging Situation: Cam does a quick exam and seals the wound with a glue gun from the future.
Conflict: Cam wants to bring Sharra back to the Vault but Lazarus won’t allow it. The situation convinces Tanner of Sharra’s unsuitability.
Action: An angry Lazarus sends Tanner to go back in time to stop the mugging. Tanner wants to get a piece of this guy for hurting Sharra.
Finish: Tanner leaves. Lazarus and Cam remove Sharra’s coat.
Seconds Later:
Tanner burst in with Cam carrying a med-kit. Cam does a quick exam and seals the wound with a glue gun from the future. Cam wants to bring Sharra back to the Vault but Lazarus won’t allow it. The situation convinces Tanner of Sharra’s unsuitability. An angry Lazarus puts Tanner in his place. He sends Tanner to go back in time to stop the mugging. Tanner wants to get a piece of this guy for hurting Sharra. Tanner leaves. Lazarus and Cam remove Sharra’s coat.
Start: Sharra wakes disorientated, then frightened.
Challenging Situation: She remembers and her hand flies to her side to find a scar where she was stabbed.
Conflict: Lazarus brushes her questions aside, using her confusion. He thinks it was a random mugging, but Sharra knows different. However, she keeps quiet about her suspicion. Lazarus wants her to stay there for the night. She eyes his computer and agrees.
Action: Lazarus steps out to take care of some things. Sharra gets on her phone. Calls Dash. He knows things that he shouldn’t, but she doesn’t pick up on it. While alone, Sharra puts the USB stick in an envelope and addresses it, then sneaks into Lazarus’s desk, pulls out her file. Flips through. Finds a file labeled: Lily and
James Lane. The accident.Finish: The door opens, stopping Sharra from opening the file. She quickly puts the file back inside the
desk.Later:
Sharra wakes disorientated, then frightened. She remembers, and her hand flies to her side to find a scar where she was stabbed. Lazarus brushes her questions aside, using her confusion. He thinks it was a random mugging, but Sharra knows different. However she keeps quiet about her suspicion. Lazarus wants her to stay there for the night. She eyes his computer and agrees. Lazarus steps out to take care of some things. Sharra gets on her phone. Calls Dash. He knows things that he shouldn’t, but she doesn’t pick up on it. While alone, Sharra puts the USB stick in an envelope and addresses it, then sneaks into Lazarus’s desk, pulls out her file. Flips through. Finds a file labeled: Lily and
James Lane. The accident. The door opens, stopping Sharra from opening the file. She quickly puts the file back inside the
drawer. Lazarus is back with a blanket and pillow.ACT 4
Start: It’s the same mugging as before. Tanner jogs into view too far away…
Challenging Situation: …and just in time to watch Jerad stab Sharra. The scene is repeated: Jerad racing away, Sharra removing her shoes, and stumbling after Jerad.
Conflict: Tanner goes in stealth mode and moves closer, but Sharra reappears from around the corner, picks up her shoes, and stumbles to the front door.
Action: Tanner rushes to the side of the building
Finish: A loved-up couple block his approach. He impatiently waits for them to move on and then races around the corner.
EXT. Office Building – Front – Night
It’s the same mugging as before. Tanner jogs into view too far away… and just in time to watch Jerad stab Sharra. The scene repeats: Jerad racing away, Sharra removing her shoes, and stumbling after Jerad. Tanner goes in stealth mode and moves closer, but Sharra reappears from around the corner, picks up her shoes, and stumbles to the front door. Tanner rushes to the side of the building. The same loved-up couple block his approach. He impatiently waits for them to move on and then races around the corner.
EXT. Side Courtyard – Continuous
Tanner scans ahead as he races to the back. A man hails a taxi in the back street. It’s Faolan but Tanner can’t see his face. He sees Sharra’s satchel, though, and sprints forward.
EXT. Back Street – Night
The taxi pulls away. Tanner takes a photo with his Com-link and gets directions.
EXT. Jerad’s House – Night
The taxi pulls away. Faolan approaches the house, keeping to the shadows. He peers in a window and moves to the back.
EXT. Jerad’s House – Back – Night
Faolan sneaks up to the back door. Removes lock picks from his utility belt. He expertly works the lock. Click. He’s done this before. He cracks open the door and slips inside.
INT. Jerad’s Kitchen – Continuous
A light shines from the living room. Faolan pauses. Listens. All is quiet. He creeps cautiously forward.
Start: Faolan switches off the light as he enters. Sits at the computer.
Challenging Situation: Uses Ailbe to get Jerad’s password.
Conflict: He finds Jerad’s email account. Several emails are addressed from Wolf. He reacts to the name.
Action: A car pulls into the driveway. Faolan peeks out the window. It’s Jerad! Faolan returns to the computer and opens the last email, takes a photo. He shuts down the computer. Pulls out his knife…
Finish: …and waits by the window. Spots Tanner running up the road just as the door unlocks. Faolan’s eyes lose focus for a moment, and then clear.
INT. Jerad’s Living Room – Night
Faolan switches off the light as he enters. Sits at the computer. Uses Ailbe to get Jerad’s password. He finds Jerad’s email account. Several emails are addressed from Wolf. He reacts to the name. A car pulls into the driveway. Faolan peeks out the window. It’s Jerad! Faolan returns to the computer and opens the last email, takes a photo. He shuts down the computer. Pulls out his knife, raises it and waits by the window. Spots Tanner running up the road just as the door unlocks. Faolan’s eyes lose focus for a moment and then clear. The door opens. The air conclaves around Faolan. The curtains ripple. Papers begin to lift.
Jerad steps in. He feels the strange disturbance in the air. He notices his computer is on and grows suspicious.
EXT. Jerad’s House – Front – Night
Tanner creeps up the driveway and onto the front porch. Through the blinds, he sees a dark form at the computer.
INT. Jerad’s Living Room – Night
Tanner burst through the door and goes ballistic. Grills Jerad. Finds out someone else was there before him and took the satchel/contract. Tanner loses control and beats Jerad only stopping when the man is unconscious. He drops Jerad and goes to the computer only to find that Jerad’s emails inbox is empty – erased.
Start: At his desk, Lazarus pulls out a parchment letter with a broken wax seal, the same seal as his ring.
Challenging Situation: Sharra’s address is on top of a few short paragraphs.
Conflict: Lazarus frowns contemplating the message. He tucks the letter in his suit and finishes his whiskey. He knows it has happened so it will happen. Tanner comes in. The mugger leads to a dead end.
Action: Tanner wants Lazarus to forget Sharra. He can’t.
Finish: An angry Lazarus sends a begrudging Tanner to watch over Sharra, keep her safe, and bring her in.
INT. Executive Suite – Night
Lazarus pours a whiskey, and with the glass and bottle, sits at his desk. Takes a swig, pours more. Though relaxed, he frowns. Something is on his mind. Lazarus pulls out a parchment letter with a broken wax seal, the same seal as his ring. Sharra’s address is on top of a few short paragraphs. Lazarus frowns contemplating the message. Tanner comes in. The mugger leads to a dead-end. Tanner wants Lazarus to forget Sharra. He can’t. An angry Lazarus sends a begrudging Tanner to watch over Sharra, keep her safe, and bring her in.
Start: Sharra touches a gravestone.
Challenging Situation: She talks to her dead parents, looking for advice. Her brother has disappeared, too. She has no one but herself.
Conflict: She wants to be brave and do the right thing. Tanner is there, watching her, listening without her knowledge.
Action: Her loneliness moves him, but he holds back from going to her.
Finish: Sharra knows what she has to do.
EXT. Graveyard – Day
Sharra is alone. She stops at a gravestone marked Lily Lane and James Lane. Tanner stops in hearing distance behind her. She talks to her dead parents, looking for advice. She wants to be brave and do the right thing. Her brother has disappeared, too. She has no one but herself. Her loneliness moves Tanner, but he holds back from going to her. Sharra squares her shoulders and leaves. Tanner ducks out of view as she passes him.
INT. Financial Office – Day
Sharra works at her desk. Read calls into his office. Dash notices and frowns.
Start: Read has Sharra shut the door.
Challenging Situation: He fishes for information. Sharra sidesteps his questions.
Conflict: Read knows about the misplaced file and that she has seen it.
Action: He threatens her. No one will believe her accusations without proof. She quits and storms out.
Finish: Read gets on his phone and calls in a favor.
INT. Boss’s Office – Day
Read has Sharra shut the door. He knows she was expecting the promotion but she too young. List her great qualities. He fishes for information without saying it outright. Sharra sidesteps his questions. He knows she’s lying, re: her perfect memory. Read knows about the misplaced file and that she has seen it. He threatens her. No one will believe her accusations without proof. She quits and storms out. Read gets on his phone and calls in a favor.
INT. Financial Office – Day
Dash follows and angry Sharra to her desk. She empties her desk into a box. Dash thinks it’s about the promotion and she doesn’t deny it. Tells him to watch his step around Read. With her box, she storms off.
Start: Faolan blends in with the pedestrians. His eye is trained on the front doors.
Challenging Situation: Sharra stomps out with her box. He starts towards her but spots Tanner, who leans on a wall, leaving his spot.
Conflict: Faolan holds back. Tanner meets Sharra. She’s not happy to find out he’s now her bodyguard.
Action: Sharra tries to get rid of Tanner, but he’s as stubborn as her.
Finish: He takes the box and meets her angry stride.
EXT. Financial Building – Day
Faolan blends in with the pedestrians. He has Sharra’s satchel. His eye is trained on the front doors. Sharra stomps out with her box. He starts towards her but spots Tanner, who leans on a wall, leaving his spot when he spots Sharra. Faolan holds back. Tanner meets Sharra. She’s not happy to find out he’s now her bodyguard. Sharra tries to get rid of Tanner, but he’s as stubborn as her. He takes the box and meets her angry stride. Faolan frowns and turns in the opposite direction.
Start: Sharra enters with Tanner behind her holding the box.
Challenging Situation: Her apartment is trashed! Everything is broken! The family picture is smashed.
Conflict: Sharra finds the camera. Cries. Tanner gets angry at whoever did it.
Action: He comforts her. She grows suspicious of him. Kicks him out. He reluctantly leaves.
Finish: She calls Dash. She’ll take the job, but she must leave now. He arranges to meet her.
INT. Sharra’s apartment – Day
Sharra enters with Tanner behind her holding the box. Her apartment is trashed! Everything is broken! Tanner pushes her aside as he goes full alert, searches her apartment. All clear. She scoops up the family picture. The glass is shattered. She finds the camera and starts to cry. Tanner is angry and wants to find whoever did this to her. He takes the camera from Sharra as he wraps his arms around her. She accepts it for a moment, then grows suspicious. Kicks him out. He reluctantly leaves. She gets on her cell phone to Dash. She’ll take the job in Chicago but must leave now. He can make that happen.
INT. Jerad’s Living Room – Day
A battered Jerad answers his cell phone. He’s gone too far stabbing Sharra. It has pushed her right into ‘their’ arms. New plan: kidnap Sharra. Jerad agrees for a price and a promise: wants revenge for the beating.
ACT 5
EXT. Warehouse – Day
Sharra gets out of a taxi. It leaves. She enters the warehouse, nervous. Something feels off.
Start: Sharra moves in, calling for Dash. A voice answers her. It’s Jerad
Challenging Situation: Jerad grabs her from behind. Sharra struggles but can’t get free.
Conflict: Read shows up with six gunmen. Jerad drops Sharra and raises his arms.
Action: Sharra accuses Read of hiring Jerad. Read and Jerad both deny it. It confuses Sharra.
Finish: Sharra looks frantically for a way out. The men cock their guns.
INT. Warehouse – Day
Sharra moves in, calling for Dash. A voice answers her. It’s Jerad. Jerad grabs her from behind. Sharra struggles but can’t get free. The cocking of multiple guns stops Sharra. They both look up to find Read (He got a tip) with half a dozen gunmen all aimed at them. Jerad drops Sharra and raises his arms. Sharra accuses Read of hiring Jerad. Read and Jerad both deny it. It confuses Sharra. Sharra looks frantically for a way out. Read laughs.
EXT. Warehouse – Day
Tanner runs up. Then, stealth mode to the open door, and hears angry voices. Read wants the USB stick.
Start: Stubbornly, Sharra refuses.
Challenging Situation: Read turns furious.
Conflict: Read grabs a gun off a gunman and shoots Sharra.
Action: But Tanner, who has been sneaking closer, throws her to the ground. The bullet hits Jerad. He falls to the ground dead. Tanner, still in motion, rolls and takes down a gunman, confiscating his gun. He’s a trained fighter. It’s obvious as he skilfully shoots two more guys
Finish: But there are too many and he’s forced to put down the gun. Tanner puts Sharra behind him, acts as a shield. Police sirens grow louder outside.
INT. Warehouse – Continuous
Stubbornly, Sharra refuses. Read grabs a gun off a gunman and shoots Sharra. But Tanner, who has been sneaking closer, throws her to the ground. The bullet hits Jerad. He falls to the ground dead. Tanner, still in motion, rolls and takes down a gunman, confiscating his gun. He’s a trained fighter. It’s obvious as he skilfully shoots two more guys, But there are too many and he’s forced to put down the gun. Tanner puts Sharra behind him, acts as a shield. It looks hopeless. The faint sound of sirens comes from outside, growing closer.
EXT. Warehouse – Continuous
Three police cars pull up, lights flashing.
Start: Sharra starts laughing. Tanner thinks she’s gone hysterical.
Challenging Situation: Sharra tells Read it’s too late for him. He won’t go out alone.
Conflict: It looks hopeless.
Action: Tanner holds Sharra. Read thinks he’s trying to save her, a useless action. Tanner has Sharra close her eyes.
Finish: His eyes unfocus for a second, then focus and they disappear just as the police storm inside. Shocked, Read and his men stand like statues and are easily subdued.
INT. Warehouse – Continuous
Sharra starts laughing. Tanner thinks she’s gone hysterical. Sharra tells Read it’s too late for him. He won’t go out alone. It looks hopeless. Tanner holds Sharra. Read thinks he’s trying to save her, a useless action. Tanner has Sharra close her eyes. His eyes unfocus for a second, then focus and they disappear just as the police storm inside. Shocked, Read and his men stand like statues and are easily subdued.
Start: Faolan enters, drops the satchel on the bed next to evening clothes. He forgot. The dinner party.
Challenging Situation: He removes the Vault jacket and gasps in pain. The cloth bandage has fresh blood oozing through.
Conflict: Hobbs helps him get dressed. Though a certain lady will be present, Faolan is distracted.
Action: Hobbs leaves. Faolan opens the satchel, lifts out the Vault contract, and raises an eyebrow. Interesting.
Finish: The photo of Sharra is in his hand. His eyes soften. He likes her. He takes his Com-link and reads the email from Jerad’s computer and realizes it had come from a Vault agent.
INT. Faolan’s Bedroom – Night
Faolan enters, drops the satchel on the bed next to evening clothes. He forgot. The dinner party! Faolan pulls the servant’s cord. He removes the Vault jacket and gasps in pain. The cloth bandage has fresh blood oozing through. He starts to unwind it.
Later
Hobbs helps Faolan get dressed. Though a certain lady will be present, Faolan is distracted. Hobbs leaves. Faolan opens the satchel, lifts out the Vault contract, and raises an eyebrow. Interesting. The photo of Sharra is in his hand. His eyes soften. He likes her. He takes his Com-link and reads the email from Jerad’s computer and realizes it had come from a Vault agent.
INT. Shiftroom – Day
A flash of white and a glimpse of Tanner and Sharra. Then, they disappear, again.
Start: Tanner and Sharra reappear in front of the building.
Challenging Situation: Sharra is in shock, but Tanner has no time to soothe her as he drags her to the door.
Conflict: She accuses him of following her. He calls her a pain in the neck and magnet for trouble. Tanner is only with Sharra at Lazarus’ command, not by choice.
Action: Tanner drags Sharra to the front door.
Finish: Neither are happy.
EXT. Office Building – Front – Night
Tanner and Sharra reappear in the empty courtyard. Sharra is in shock, but Tanner doesn’t slow down as he drags her to the front door. She accuses him of following her. He calls her a pain in the neck and magnet for trouble. Tanner is only with Sharra at Lazarus’ command, not by choice. Neither are happy.
Start: Tanner and Sharra burst in. Tanner gives Lazarus a shortened briefing.
Challenging Situation: The only option: to take their offer.
Conflict: Lazarus gives her the option that if she is unhappy, she can go anywhere she wants after that. Sharra has nothing left.
Action: Forced to flee or be killed, she accepts the offer. Lazarus promises all will be revealed. She has to trust him.
Finish: He takes her hand. She thinks about destiny. They vanish.
INT. Executive Suite – Night
Tanner and Sharra burst in. Tanner gives Lazarus a shortened briefing. The only option: to take their offer. Lazarus gives her the option that if she is unhappy, she can go anywhere she wants after that. Sharra has nothing left. Forced to flee or be killed, she accepts the offer. Lazarus promises all will be revealed. She has to trust him. He takes her hand. She thinks about destiny. They vanish.
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Tracy El Pueblo Scene Requirements
What I learned is that I couldn’t go on with finishing the complex outline without some serious research for two of my real-life characters. Since this is an historical piece, I didn’t want to waste time writing something in general and have to come back to flesh it out later when writing the first draft. I need to have a internal visual to write the story from, but I have had to revise the outline after going a certain direction since August!
What has thrown me for a loop was uncovering a seemingly inconsequential piece of information about Joseph. He’s more of an enigma than ever! This ended up altering my conception of him up to this point. He’s not who I had been imagining. So that has taken more than a couple of weeks to age him and find out more about creating the world he inhabitats in my series.
I’m satisfied with everything in the outline up to Act 4 — I needed to learn more about the real-life voyage I’m sending Thomas on. And then Act 5 is about Joseph, which is where I’m still working now. I’ve had to learn a lot about shipbuilding and whaling. It’s all fascinating, but I do get caught up in the research phases.
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Janeen’s Outline Requirements
What I learned doing this lesson is that creating the story was necessary to provide me with a better outline rather than just an idea for each scene.
Last Scene:
Start: Dinner is over and we hear Jim’s truck pull on the yard.
Situation: Hunter leaves in a panic, apologizing for having stayed so long.
Conflict: Jim is furious and we can hear snatches of his tongue lashing to Hunter about volunteering to do the work rather than helping the Campions to do it.
Action: Jim punctuates his loudest accusations with backhands to Hunter’s head, pushes, etc. Hunter, head down, gets into the truck and slumps against the door to be as far as possible from Jim.
Finish: The twins flinch, saying Hunter’s in big trouble now, Randi gasps with each smack and Cara looks totally disillusioned and shocked.
DESCRIPTION
With dessert over and Cara having said she’ll stay in Iowa, Hunter and the rest of the family chat amicably until they hear Jim’s truck pull on the yard. Hunter grabs his jacket and school bag in a hurry, apologizing for having stayed so long and not let his dad know where he is.
Jim is halfway to the door before Hunter is out and gives him a verbal tongue lashing as he rousts him back toward the pickup. The Campions can hear snatches that include him not volunteering to help them when they could get the land. They stop at the truck door and Jim punctuates his loudest accusations with backhands to Hunter’s head, pushes, etc. Hunter, head down, gets into the truck and slumps against the door as far away from Jim as possible. The twins flinch saying Hunter’s in big trouble now, Randi gasps with each smack and Cara looks disillusioned and shocked.
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R. Reid Jr’s Scene Requirements
What I learned from this requirement is that as I put these scene together it is really solidifying a story and my drive to make this a good series, one that people want to come back to again and again.
LESSON 11: Scene Requirements
Description:
Start: On the campus
Challenging Situation: Helping the Agents on campus.
Conflict: Being pulled in 3 directions-no right way to go.
Action: Agents hunting mysterious person.
Finish: Bruce must decide who to trust and what direction he will go.SCENE REQUIREMENT QUESTIONS
Here is the list of questions that you can use to improve any scene.
A. Scene Arc: Where does this scene START and FINISH that will be an interesting change?
Bruce going from the hunter to hunted and not knowing it.
B. Challenging Situation: What situation/circumstances could challenge these characters goals, needs, values, wounds, or physically?
Bruce in a vulnerable situation taking classes to understand Earth/Sigma 2619 culture and ended up seated to Snowy the girl he lost in the bar
C. Conflict: What is the conflict of this scene?
Bruce deals with telling Snowy the night he met her and her knuckles were all bloody. But she doesn’t remember him then.
D. Action: What actions could deliver the meaning of the scene or be engaging to watch?
The Agents showing up looking for someone who matches Snowy and the Mysterious woman finds Bruce on Campus and pulls him to the side and asks if he remembers her. He says at the bar, but she says before that!!CREATING CHALLENGING SITUATIONS
CHALLENGE THEIR GOAL: The objective of the journey. Win the contest, defeat the opponent, etc.
Bruce on the campus talking to the Mysterious woman and not knowing if she is friend or foe.
CHALLENGE THEIR NEED: Their internal drive. Needs like love, self-esteem, security, power, achievement, etc.
Bruce and Snowy or Bruce and the Female agent. If he gets close or opens up it will be his first Earth/Sigma 2619 love.
CHALLENGE THEIR VALUES: What the character believes is important for quality of life: Happiness, loyalty, community, excellence, hard work, money, etc..
Being loyal to the Agents get compromised when he is overhearing the lead agent saying how he would sell his partner out or anyone who got in the way of the investigation including Bruce.
CHALLENGE THEIR WOUND: A deep emotional injury that ruptured a part of the character’s life.
Bruce with a lost memory could be stepping on a landmine if he chooses the wrong person of the three to ally with.
CHALLENGE THEM PHYSICALLY: Anything in the outer world that impedes the character from reaching their goal.
Bruce being pulled aside by the Mysterious woman. Is she a friend or foe?Description:
Start: On the campus
Challenging Situation: Helping the Agents on campus.
Conflict: Being pulled in 3 directions-no right way to go.
Action: Agents hunting mysterious person.
Finish: Bruce must decide who to trust and what direction he will go.
Pass 2 Turn into description.
EXT. CAMPUS DAY
Agents enter the campus from the distance they are handing out a paper asking students if they have seen someone on the paper.
Bruce is debating to go toward them and he notices his phone with missed messages from the Agents.
As he is about to answer his phone a hand gently comes over his hand. It is the Mysterious woman who says she needs to speak to him.
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Rob’s Scene Requirements
What I learned doing this assignment is the benefit of checking if every scene has conflict. Sometimes a simple addition to a scene can raise the conflict, generate more tension, empathy etc.
TEASER:
INT. CLUB – NIGHT
A young stud tries to hit on an attractive woman, but she rebuffs him.
Start: A woman sits at a bar
Challenging Situation: A stud tries to hit on her
Conflict: The woman doesn’t want to talk to the stud
Action: The stud pretends to be cool
Finish: The stud gives up and leaves her alone
EXT. STREET / ALLEYWAY – NIGHT
The young stud and his friends try to rape the woman but she turns out to be a demon in disguise and kills them all.
Start: The woman strolls down the street
Challenging Situation: She is attacked by the studs
Conflict: The studs are planning to rape her
Action: The studs drag her into an alleyway
Finish: The woman kills them – reveal: she lured them there in the first place!
ACT 1:
INT. MUSEUM – DAY
We meet Julia Lockhart, an archaeologist, chatting with a close colleague about her recent failed archaeological dig. Her boss, Vincent, summons her to his office.
Full description here. Says to herself “Suck it up, Julia. Behave yourself.”
Start: Julia is trying not to think about her failed dig
Challenging Situation: A colleague asks her about it
Conflict: Julia is avoiding talking about it
Action: Walking through the dinosaur exhibits
Finish: Julia’s boss, Vincent, summons her to his office
INT. VINCENT’S OFFICE – DAY
Vincent chastises Julia for the money wasted on the dig, which was organised based on her instincts and research, then sends her away contemptuously.
Start: Vincent calmly asks about the dig. Julia is nervous
Challenging Situation: Vincent is angry about money and reputation wasted on the dig and belittles Julia for her failure
Conflict: Vincent explodes in rage
Action: Julia takes it, then explodes back at him and gets fired
Finish: Julia gets fired
INT. JULIA’S OFFICE AT THE MUSEUM – DAY
Julia catalogues a few uninteresting items (bones, etc) collected from the dig, fuming at her mistreatment by her boss.
Her friend / colleague suggests they grab a drink but she has undefined, mysterious “plans” for the evening.
Start: Julia unhappily packs her things
Challenging Situation: She is unhappy about being fired and kicks herself for her rebelliousness
Conflict: Julia wonders whether to apologise or not
Action: Her colleague asks her out for a consoling drink
Finish: Julia sadly leaves her office and shuts the door on an Indiana Jones poster
EXT. ALLEYWAY – DAY
Detective Brendan White investigates the scene of the young studs’ deaths as his team collects evidence. He has a prosthetic arm.
One of his colleagues urges him to return to the station about a development in another case.
Start: Studs have been murdered
Challenging Situation: Cops collect evidence about the studs’ death – wonder if it is murder or suicide, jurisdictional conflict with local police
Conflict: Detective White takes control from a doofus homicide detective
Action: White demonstrates his smarts, wit and authority
Finish: White takes control of the scene, then departs
INT. POLICE CAR – DAY
En-route, Detective White glances at a headline at a newsstand: “Mirage at Large”, and scowls.
Start: White is on his way to the police station
Challenging Situation: Bad traffic (“Now there’s a creative interpretation of the road rules”)
Conflict: White is angry about the Mirage
Action: White chats with his colleague as they travel
Finish: They get to the station
INT. POLICE STATION HOLDING CELL – DAY
Detective White interviews a criminal, Adrian Morris, after a human-trafficking bust. White knows Morris as a brutal psychopath, but now Morris is sobbing remorsefully and confessing after being captured by a mysterious figure he calls “The Mirage”.
Start: Adrian Morris has been arrested
Challenging Situation: Morris is terrified of the Mirage
Conflict: White can’t get anything useful from the convict
Action: White interrogates Morris
Finish: White abandons the interrogation
INT. POLICE STATION OFFICE – DAY
White confers with colleagues about Morris’s apparent conversion and confession as a result of his encounter with the Mirage.
He interviews one of the trafficking victims who saw the Mirage as he intercepted the truck carrying the abductees, but the information is sketchy.
They look at Morris’s dash cam footage, revealing a dark and powerful figure with a face hidden in heat haze.
Start: White is skeptical about Morris’s “performance”
Challenging Situation: Conflicting and confusing information about Morris and his encounter with the Mirage
Conflict: White wants to catch the Mirage and Morris isn’t helping
Action: White confers with colleagues and abductees
Finish: White wants to solve this mystery
EXT. MUSEUM – NIGHT
Julia leaves the museum. As she climbs into a taxi she notices someone stalking her from the shadows.
Start: Julia is unhappy with being fired
Challenging Situation: someone is stalking her
Conflict: Fear of the stalker
Action: Gets into a taxi and flees
Finish: Gets into a taxi and flees
INT. TAXI – NIGHT
Julia arrives at a bar.
Start: Julia is en-route to the bar
Challenging Situation: Confusion and doubt about what she is doing
Conflict: Getting lost and confused
Action: Looks about, finding her way, then recognises a place
Finish: Gets out of the taxi
INT. BAR
Julia has a drink, alone, aimless, unclear why she is there.
Start: Julia has a drink alone
Challenging Situation: Not knowing why she is there or what she is looking for
Conflict: Confusion
Action: Has a drink and chats with the barman
Finish: Still confused
EXT. STREET OUTSIDE BAR – NIGHT
The stalker watches her through the window.
INT. BAR – NIGHT
Julia chats briefly with the bar tender. He appears to notice someone outside in the shadows, but dismisses it.
Start: The barman is friendly and nondescript
Challenging Situation: Wondering if someone is outside
Conflict: Julia is in danger without knowing it
Action: Chatting with the barman
Finish: Julia leaves the bar
EXT. STREET OUTSIDE BAR – NIGHT
Julia exits the bar, sees the stalker and hurries away. The stalker follows.
Start: Julia exits the bar
Challenging Situation: A stalker is on her tail
Conflict: The stalker chases her
Action: Julia flees
Finish: Julia flees and hides
INT. MULTI-LEVEL CAR PARK – NIGHT
The stalker accosts her and asks her about “The Blade”. She doesn’t know what he is talking about. The barman intervenes and the stalker reveals itself as a powerful demon.
The barman fights it off, ramming it into a concrete pylon, and they flee to safety.
Start: Julia flees from the stalker
Challenging Situation: The stalker is a demon
Conflict: The demon wants something from her but she doesn’t understand
Action: The barman rescues her
Finish: She and the barman flee from the demon
ACT 2:
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
Having fled to safety, Julia asks the barman about the demon and about himself. He dismisses her questions and departs.
Start: Julia is terrified by the encounter with the demon
Challenging Situation: Fear of the demon
Conflict: The barman is taciturn; Julia has lots of questions
Action: They talk in the street as they flee through the crowd
Finish: The barman departs
EXT. MADELEINE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
The barman (David) collects the mail and then enters the house, stepping smoothly, ghostlike, THROUGH the front door.
Start: David arrives home
Challenging Situation: checks for surveillance
Conflict: Is anyone watching
Action: Steps through the front door
Finish: Enters the house
INT. MADELEINE’S BEDROOM – DAY
We meet Madeleine, 85. David reveals his encounter with the demon, clearly not the first he has encountered.
Start: Madeleine is in bed; David enters
Challenging Situation: David is concerned about the demon encounter
Conflict: Madeleine is encouraging; David is despondent, fearful
Action: David agrees to continue his search
Finish: David leaves
EXT. JULIA’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Julia glances about, furtive, anxious, then unlocks her front door and enters.
A figure watches her from the shadows. It is David. He vanishes and appears …
Start: David watches Julia
Challenging Situation: Julia is mysterious and he wants to know more about her
Conflict: Julia is secretive
Action: David teleports into Julia’s house
Finish: David enters Julia’s house
INT. JULIA’S HOUSE – NIGHT
… beside Julia in her living room – but he is invisible to her. He watches her as she moves about the house.
He is shocked when she reveals hand-drawn pictures of the demon they just encountered, along with many others, and of himself.
ACT 3:
Julia is terrified as David reveals himself, materialising before her. He asks about the pictures which she says she drew – based on images in her dreams.
She asks for his help to understand but he refuses, saying to forget about him, then vanishes again.
Start: David watches Julia
Challenging Situation: Julia reveals pictures
Conflict: David is surprised and angry
Action: David appears and interrogates her
Finish: David departs
INT. MULTI-LEVEL CAR PARK – DAY
David returns to the scene of the demon attack and watches the fight he had with the demon as though looking back through time.
He looks closely where the demon made contact with the pylon and collects something in a vial, then vanishes again.
Start: David returns to the scene of the attack
Challenging Situation: Collecting samples of demon essence
Conflict: Avoiding being seen by passers by, demons etc
Action: David collects samples
Finish: David leaves with the samples
INT. MADELEINE’S KITCHEN – DAY
David materialises beside Madeleine, who is unfazed by his sudden appearance.
He shows her the vial and she crosses her fingers for luck.
Start: Madeleine is doing dishes
Challenging Situation: David is tense about the forthcoming experiment
Conflict: David fights doubt and
Action: David chats with Madeleine then …
INT. MADELEINE’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
David sinks into the floor, passing through the floorboards …
Finish: … David descends into the floor
INT. GROUND – DAY
David passes through the soil, rock, etc, descending into …
INT. UNDERGROUND LAB – DAY
David descends from the ceiling and lands nimbly on the floor.
He puts the contents of the vial through various processes – chemicals, arcane substances, artefacts – but he is disappointed with the result.
Start: David descends into his underground lab
Challenging Situation: Wrestling with the demon’s essence – it fights back like an angry bug
Conflict: David fights to get the essence into the vial
Action: David tests the essence, then destroys it
Finish: The experiment has failed
EXT. RAILWAY STATION – DAY
The stalker-demon senses some of its essence being destroyed and flinches angrily.
INT. MADELEINE’S HOUSE – DAY
David reports back to Madeleine the “negative” result. She shares his disappointment.
They see a press conference on TV of Brendan White discussing the Mirage and the mysterious case of the young men killed in the alleyway.
Start: Madeleine is hopeful
Challenging Situation: David reports the failed experiment
Conflict: David is prepared to give up
Action: Madeleine urges him to continue his search
Finish: David gets a new opportunity when Brendan White reports on the murders
ACT 4:
EXT. ALLEYWAY – DAY
David investigates the deaths of the young men. He looks back through time again to see the demon woman kill them.
David follows the “image” of her as she flees the scene.
Start: David investigates the alleyway
Challenging Situation: Lack of evidence
Conflict:
Action: David uses his powers to see back in time and hunt the demon woman
Finish: David follows the demon woman’s image
EXT. STREETS – DAY
David follows the demon woman’s image through the streets to a railway station.
Start: David follows the demon woman’s image
Challenging Situation: People milling about – he steps right through them and they don’t notice
Conflict: Hunting the demon woman
Action: Hunting the demon woman
Finish: Still searching
INT. RAILWAY STATION – DAY
David follows the demon’s image as it boards a train, then he floats along the subway tunnel (currently empty of trains) until she disembarks at another station.
EXT. HOUSE – DAY
David watches her image as it enters a house then he vanishes.
Start: David finds the demon woman’s home
Challenging Situation: David wrestles with his fear
Conflict: Deciding whether to go inside or not
Action: David enters the house
Finish: David enters the house
INT. DEMON WOMAN’S HOUSE – DAY
David materialises inside the house and lets his mystical sight return to the present. Suddenly the demon woman, now in the flesh, appears and attacks him.
They fight. He is momentarily disoriented by her powers and she flees out of the house.
Start: David enters the demon woman’s house
Challenging Situation: The demon woman attacks him
Conflict: David fights the demon woman
Action: The demon woman disorients him with her powers
Finish: The demon woman flees
EXT. STREETS – DAY
The demon woman flees and finds two policemen, feigning needing their protection from David. Then she kills them, framing David for their murder – a bystander catches him on camera, kneeling over the bodies.
Start: David chases the demon woman
Challenging Situation: The demon woman enlists the help of cops to protect her (why can’t he turn invisible??)
Conflict: Davis tries to get the demon woman away from the cops
Action: The demon woman kills the cops
Finish: David is framed for the cops murder.
INT. DEMON WOMAN’S HOUSE – DAY
David collects something in the vial that he used before, then vanishes.
INT. UNDERGROUND LAB – DAY
David processes the vial again, and is again disappointed with the negative result.
Start: David is somewhat hopeful about the experiment
Challenging Situation: Doubt about the experiment
Conflict: Frustration with the failed experiments
Action: David tests the essence sample
Finish: The test is another failure.
EXT. ROCKY LANDSCAPE – NIGHT
David sits on a rocky outcrop, gazing at the starry sky, deep in thought.
His gaze shifts to the earth in the night sky and we realise he is on the moon.
Start: David reflects on the situation
Challenging Situation: Fear and doubt
Conflict: What to do next
Action: Sitting and reflecting
Finish: Departs the moon
EXT. DARK SIDE OF THE MOON
Scattered across the rocky landscape are numerous corpses, dressed in a range of garb both ancient and modern. They are dusty but otherwise perfectly preserved in the vacuum of space.
Start: The moon is quiet and still, peaceful, but …
Challenging Situation: … there are bodies everywhere
Conflict: Who killed these people?
Action: The aftermath of violence
Finish:
INT. MORGUE – DAY
Brendan White stands by as the partners of the two policemen identify their bodies.
Stone-faced, he watches the online video of the Mirage at their murder scene.
Consumed with rage, he departs.
Start: Brendan White is wondering what to do
Challenging Situation: He thinks the Mirage killed these cops
Conflict: Brendan White doesn’t know where the Mirage is
Action: The relatives identify the bodies
Finish: Brendan White resolves to capture the Mirage
ACT 5:
INT. MADELEINE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
David and Madeleine discuss the recent demon attacks. He says they seem to be gathering again.
Madeleine encourages David to keep searching for the demon he seeks.
Start: David is determined to find the demon he seeks
Challenging Situation: Madeleine says he must seek Julia’s help
Conflict: David refuses to team up with Julia
Action: David and Madeleine argue
Finish: David shows his stubbornness
EXT. STREETS NEAR MADELEINE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Julia arrives at David’s house and tries to photograph him through the window. He sees her and accosts her, then teleports her inside.
But three demons have followed her.
Start: Julia arrives at the house
Challenging Situation: David has been found!
Conflict: Julia tries to photograph David
Action: David accosts Julia and takes her inside
Finish: Three demons approach the house
INT. MADELEINE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
David battles the three demons as they try to kill Julia and Madeleine.
Some of his memories return and he discovers a new power – his voice can harm the demons and they flee.
Start: Demons enter the house
Challenging Situation: David cannot fight all three at once
Conflict: David tries to keep Madeleine and Julia safe by fighting the demons (why can’t he teleport them away?)
Action: Julia helps David remember his powers
Finish: David repels the demons with his new voice power
INT. MADELEINE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Julia, Madeleine and David recover in the aftermath of the battle. Julia asks who David is but he refuses to answer and departs to track the demons, hoping to find who sent them.
Start: The aftermath of the demon attack
Challenging Situation: Who sent the demons?
Conflict: David is angry with Julia for bringing the demons and exhausted by the fight
Action: David and Julia argue
Finish: David departs to track them
EXT. MUSEUM – NIGHT
Julia’s boss, Vincent, departs the museum.
Something stalks him from the shadows: it is the three demons David fought, all wounded.
They report to Vincent, kneeling before him!
Start: The demons appear to be stalking Vincent
Challenging Situation: Vincent appears to be in danger
Conflict: The demons approach Vincent
Action: Vincent confronts the demons
Finish: The demons kneel before him and report to him
EXT. CITY – NIGHT
David tracks the “residues” of the demons through the streets, across roof tops etc where they have travelled.
EXT. MUSEUM – NIGHT
Vincent reveals an amulet and waves it over the demons kneeling before him.
Start: The demons fear Vincent
Challenging Situation: Vincent knows David will be tracking him
Conflict: Vincent orders the demons to be silent
Action: Vincent erases the trail that David can follow
Finish: The demon residue dissolves and he gives up
EXT. CITY – NIGHT
The residues of the demons dissolve – David can no longer track them!
Start: David tracks the demons
Challenging Situation:
Conflict:
Action:
Finish: The demon residue dissolves and he gives up
INT. POLICE STATION – NIGHT
Detective White slaps a hazy photograph of the Mirage onto a wall, along with an array of evidence, events and question marks.
He is determined to find the Mirage!
Start: Detective White collates he evidence of the Mirage’s activities
Challenging Situation The Mirage is elusive
Conflict: Anger towards the Mirage
Action: Collating evidence
Finish: White resolves to find the Mirage
INT. MADELEINE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
David returns home to Julia and Madeleine. They pack some things and go on the run, no longer safe at Madeleine’s house.
David asks Julia when the dreams about the demons began.
They are a team now.
Start: David returns home, unsuccessful in tracking the demons
Challenging Situation: The demons know where they are now
Conflict: Julia has information that David needs but won’t admit to needing
Action: David and Julia argue
Finish: David resolves to team up with Julia
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