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Day 15 Assignments
Posted by cheryl croasmun on January 16, 2022 at 6:57 pmReply to post your assignment.
Tom Wilson replied 3 years, 2 months ago 5 Members · 4 Replies -
4 Replies
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James’s horror outline Version 1
I learned how to write scenes from the point of view of a large amount of horror emotions and situations.
(Apologies for the weird code that embedded the bullet points – not sure what that’s all about)
ACT 1
EXT. WILDERNESS – DAY
An extreme hiker, OUTDOORS OLLIE, walks through a very secluded area. He is clearly an extreme hiking vlogger, but much crapper than he appears on camera. As he walks along, he holds a selfy stick as he films himself. He hears a rustle in a bush, thinks it might be a deer, hushes at the camera and creeps over to the bush. As he moves the bushes out of the way, a bear jump scares him. He screams and quickly scrambles up a tree, but when the bear comes after him, he pepper sprays it.
After the bear leaves, he walks to a clearing and makes a fire to cook a meal. He videos himself eating rabbit but just as he is about to put it in a mouth, a racoon jump scares him and steals the food from him. He jumps so much that he falls backwards off his chair shrieking and saying how much he hates those shifty little bastards. Later, he is walking through the woods, on edge, when he hears a noise behind a tree. He is immediately on edge and slowly circles around the tree. Suddenly a chipmunk leaps onto his face, blinding him and totally freaking him out. He runs around, his arms in the air, screaming, until the chipmunk leaps off him and he runs into a tree, knocking himself out.
Horror situation: Ollie is attacked by various wildlife creatures
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense as he pulls back the bush to reveal the bear
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise as the bear jumps out at him
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear as the bear comes after him
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Panic as he tries to escape, scrambling to climb the tree, the bear hot on his heels
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock as the racoon steals his food
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as he hears the noise from behind the tree
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense builds as the sound keeps moving around the tree as he moves around it
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock as the chipmunk attacks
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Panic as he runs around, blinded by the chipmunk
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Release as he knocks himself out
EXT. WOODLAND CLEARING – DAY
Ollie has made a camp for the evening and has set up his camera on a small tripod. He stops, looks up at the setting sun and then starts the camera recording. He gives a report on his day, (Hey guys, Outdoors Ollie here). He’s very macho and says it’s been an interesting day with some close encounters of the natural kind, pointing to the bump on his forehead from the chipmunk incident. He says I’m now literally hundreds of miles from the nearest living soul.
He hears a noise that sounds like someone sniggering behind him.
It freaks him out a bit, but he tries to look macho in front of the camera. Maybe I’m not alone! he says, trying to laugh it off, but he is clearly unnerved. He walks towards the noise, after taking out and unfolding a comically large pocket knife. He steps onto something, which makes a slight clicking noise, which suddenly and swiftly sets off a huge bear trap that sinks into his midriff. He screams, then hears a loud ticking sound and looks puzzled but then we hear a second trap set off and an even larger bear trap flies up and decapitates him just below the shoulders.
He doesn’t have time to react, it all happens too quickly. We hear the sniggering sound again and then we see a shoeless foot stamp on a lever and the trap opens back up, the hiker’s body falling to the floor. A filthy hand picks the head up off the floor, and the body is dragged away by the unseen killer.
Horror situation: Ollie hears a creepy voice and is killed by a double bear trap
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Creepy moment when he hears the sniggering voice behind him (he’s supposed to be hundreds of miles from anyone)
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension when Ollie investigates
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock when the trap springs on him for the first time
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear for a brief moment that he is going to die
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise when the second trap decapitates him
INT. BRUNO’S BEDROOM – DAY
This room is chaotic. There is stuff everywhere, and on the walls thee are framed video game posters for The Forest, The Last of Us, Mortal Kombat, Wolfenstein II, Manhunt and Carmageddon.
CELINE and BRUNO, early 20s, are having fairly raucous sex. Celine is bouncing up and down on Bruno who is loving it. She is saying come on, come on, but s we close on her face, we see she is focusing on her smart watch calorie counter. As Bruno climaxes, Celine shouts Yes! iI just burned 100 calories. So not a complete waste of time.
Bruno says, Babe, you say the nicest things. He clearly doesn’t care. He’s not in love with her, he just loves shagging her. He’s not a complicated guy. She smiles a fake smile.
Suddenly the mood changes as there is a strange noise coming from the bathroom door. She asks him what it could be, and he says no idea. She climbs off him and slowly walks towards the bathroom door. As she gets there, there is a loud bang, which makes her jump. She tentatively opens the bathroom door: suddenly, a cat leaps out on top of her. She shouts fuck and freaks out. I fucking hate cats. Bruno says, but he loves you. She looks at her watch. We’d better get going. We are not going to be late.
He says, Are you sure you want to come, ‘cos…
Of course I want to come, I wouldn’t miss this for the world.
It’s just, you know, you’re not technically invited.
Yes, but where you go I go, right?
Uh, sure…
Come on, let’s go. I fucking hate being late.
Horror situation: They hear a noise coming from somewhere
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense as Celine approaches the door
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear as a loud bang scares her
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as she opens the door
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise as the cat jumps out at her
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Panic as she freaks out
INT. AUBREY’S BEDROOM – DAY
This room is pristine. Nothing is out of place and there are a couple of Monet paintings on the wall and a couple of literary posters – one for Jean-Paul Sartre’s Huis Clos and another for Camus’ L’Etranger.
SHANIA and AUBREY are also having sex, but it is quite dull. They have clearly been together for some time. He tells her he is about to come and she says OK, she smiles but clearly isn’t that into it. He comes in a very protestant way and she feigns interest, He says it’s amazing how the sex is still so good, even after all these years. She says yeah…
Aubrey complains about the upcoming trip, he really doesn’t want to go – why does Justin have to invite us on these fucking trips? He knows I hate the outdoors. He’s a damn sadist. Shania tells him it will be fun, she can’t wait to hang out with Brittany. If she comes, says Aubrey. She hates the wilderness as much as I do.
The mood changes to one of suspense when they hear a noise. What was that? I’ve no idea. He slowly walks over to the closet and freaks out when the whole closet suddenly moves. He jumps back but then slowly reaches out and opens the door. A large white shaggy dog leaps out, knocking him over. Aubrey craps himself and then shouts, Enrique, for the love of god, how many times do I have to tell you to keep Bojo out of my room? I fucking detest dogs. Shania is petting the dog and says, I love Bojo – you’re such a good dog, aren’t you!
There is a car horn, and Aubrey goes to the window. That can’t be Bruno… Sure enough, Bruno is outside, waving and smiling broadly, like the cat that got the cream. It’s a miracle, he’s NEVER on time, what the hell..?
Horror situation: They hear a noise coming from the closet
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense as Aubrey approaches the closet
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear as the closet moves
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as Aubrey opens the door
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise as the dog jumps out onto him
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Panic as she freaks out
EXT. SUBURBAN STREET – DAY
They go down to the car and are both shocked to see Celine sitting in the passenger seat. Bruno jokes around, isn’t it great? Celine was able to come! Shania mutters, that’s more than I could manage. She greets Celine, they’re both civil and outwardly smiling, but it’s clear they’re not besties. Aubrey gives Bruno a look. What? Justin is going to be most displeased.
INT. JUSTIN’S BEDROOM – DAY
Justin’s room is so manly it’s painful. The wall has photos of lakes and mountains and wildlife. He is clearly an outdoors fan.
JUSTIN and BRITTANY are having movie star sex. Everything is perfect, they are clearly very much in love. They reach a loud and hilarious climax. Justin is a big guy, in very good shape, Brittany is a bit more bookish but still very attractive.
The mood changes when they hear a noise. She is freaked out and asks what’s that? She hears another noise and slowly walks over to the bedroom door, then jumps as the door bangs. Tentatively, she opens the door and a huge tiger roars, jumps into the room and knocks her over. She laughs and starts petting the tiger, who is rubbing up affectionately against her, saying I fucking love tigers.
Justin complains that she isn’t coming on the camping trip. Justin is a real outdoors type, Brittany not so much. She tells him that she’s not going to go, you go without me. You know I hate camping – it’s not camping, it’s a cabin! They’re all c-words to me. If god had wanted us to stay in cabins he wouldn’t have invented hotels with en-suite bathrooms and jacuzzi hot tubs. Does this cabin have a bathroom with hot water and a kitchen with a proper stove? Yes. And a butler. And a bar, with a really good bartender? He tries to persuade her. They hear the car horn. Seriously? Bruno is never on time…
He looks out of the window and sees Celine. Always on time, damn her. Shit. Justin begs Brittany to come with him now to protect him from Celine. Reluctantly, she agrees, but neither are happy about Celine being there.
Horror situation: They hear a noise coming from outside the bedroom
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense as Brittany approaches the door
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear as the door bangs
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as Brittany opens the door
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise as the tiger jumps out onto her
EXT. CITY STREET – DAY
They come over to the car and Bruno smiles and points at his watch – what kept you? Brittany is frosty with Celine who is outwardly friendly. Brittany jumps into the back of the car with Shania and they hug, clearly good friends. She whispers, so..? Shania nods her head, smiling, but whispers to her to be quiet. She hasn’t told Aubrey yet, it’s still early.
Justin has a chat with Bruno and Aubrey away from the car – it is clear they are good friends who go back a long way. Justin is furious that Bruno has brought Celine, his ex, without asking. It’s bad enough you’re dating her, but bringing her along? How fucking dumb can you get? Bruno calms him down, it will be great. She’s over you man. She’s just using you to get to me, you know that right? With that body she can use me to get to anybody.
Aubrey takes the piss out of the car – I didn’t see you as a mini-van man, Bruno. Are you finally ready to settle down. It’s a rental, dickhead. And it fits six, so shut up. Did you pack your slippers? And your pipe? Fuck you. Eloquent with the come-backs, as ever. Bruno imitates Aubrey’s voice in an exaggerated way, repeating his sentence.
EXT. CITY LIMITS – DAY
The car winds its way along a highway that quickly turns into countryside.
INT. CAR – DAY
In the car, Bruno complains about this being a fucking gas guzzler. There’s no way we’ll be able to get to the cabin without running out of gas. They are in a pretty remote area already, but there is a big house that he spots and pulls over.
EXT. COUNTRYSIDE – DAY
Bruno gets out and walks over towards a house where the owner is watering the lawn. He is a really dodgy-looking guy, the opposite of a city slicker. The guy nods at him and Bruno asks if he might have some gas going spare. The guy says are you serious? He points to the huge gasoline truck parked next to his house. Cool!
They all get out of the car to stretch their legs. Shania and Brittany go to find a spot to pee and Celine climbs into the very back seat and settles down to sleep.
Justin and Aubrey join Bruno and the man and they all chat as the guy fills the car’s tank with gas. He asks them where they’re heading, and they tell him – Victorville Lake. Let me give you some extra to take – you don’t want to run out of gas if you’re heading that way. Whatever you do, don’t leave the main road. And don’t go west, up by the pines. Stay away from the pines. Why? Strange things happen out there. Papa Carter went up there just a few weeks ago to do some oil painting in the woods. Came back. He shakes his head sadly.
Bruno is intrigued – what happened? No paint brushes. They’d just disappeared. And he had no face. What? Well, no that last bit’s not true, but he couldn’t see properly no more. What? Yeah, he lost his reading glasses. Now he can’t fuckin’ read – can you imagine that? Not being able to read? Horrible. And Ma Hardesty went out there to go fishing. Never seen again. Well, not without a sunburn, anyway. And it was a really bad sunburn. It stung for days, she said. Just stay away. Nothing good happens up there. Shania tells Bruno to listen to the man – he seems to be very wise.
They all get back in the car
Horror situation: They are warned not to go near the pines
INT. CAR – DAY
They carry on with Justin now riding shotgun next to Bruno, Celine is trying to sleep in the far back next to a reluctant Aubrey who asks her to let Shania sit there. Celine refuses, saying she needs to sleep and the middle’s not comfortable enough. He says, Whatever makes you happy, princess.
I’m a fucking princess? You’re the one who brought a juicer on a camping trip.
The cabin’s kitchen is woefully ill-equipped, I’m not eating burnt burgers all weekend.
Woefully ill-equipped? Who even talks like that?
Someone with an education.
You arrogant fuck.
You joyless harridan.
I don’t know what that means, but it’s probably not good, so fuck you, you ass hole. Justin shouts back telling them to shut up. Go to sleep, Celine. She opens her mouth to retort, thinks twice about it and mutters damn right I’ll go to sleep. Because I want to go to sleep. Not cos you told me to.
Justin also settles down to sleep, as does Aubrey. Shania and Brittany chat quietly among themselves. Shania tells her she has a few girls’ names picked.
EXT. MAIN ROAD – DAY
Bruno ignores the warning and, without telling the rest of them, leaves the main road. He trundles along a pretty crappy road but comes across a large diversion sign. Shit, He turns onto an even crappier dirt road, gets exasperated and starts driving really fast. The GPS on his phone has stopped working, he’s driving blind.
Justin wakes up and they have a big argument about him leaving the main road – where the fuck are we? I don’t know, but who cares? We’ll get to somewhere! Justin tells him to slow down, as do the others, but instead he speeds up, yelling out loud. Bruno, for once go against type says Aubrey. Justin loses it and tells him to stop the car, this is bullshit: Bruno smiles and takes his hands off the wheel – you wanna drive? You drive, buddy!
Justin grabs the wheel but, just as he does the tires all suddenly burst, Justin loses control, the car careers off the road and slams into a tree stump at such a speed that the car rears up on its hood and falls onto its roof.
As it does, it lands on a spiked tree stump that crashes through the windscreen and impales itself into Justin’s face. There is silence, all the passengers are knocked unconscious except Justin, who is very dead. We hear footsteps and the passenger door opens. We hear the same sniggering as in the opening scene.
Horror situation: Their car crashes, killing Justin in a horribly violent and bloody way
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as Bruno speeds up on a bad road
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Anxiety when he takes his hands off the wheel at high speed and Justin has to take over the steering
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock when the car crashes and tips over onto its roof
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror when Justin gets impaled by the tree stump
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Creepy moment when we hear the same sniggering as at the beginning of the film
EXT. DESOLATE COUNTRYSIDE – DAY
The survivors slowly start to wake up one by one but there is no Justin. There is however, a lot of blood. Brittany and Celine are really worried – Shania says he just went for help, that’s typical of Justin – he’s seen us all unconscious and decided to find help. He’ll be back soon with a tow truck and an ambulance. And some breakfast burritos! But Bruno says that is a lot of blood.
Aubrey says Justin’s a fucking animal, he’s gone for help. That’s the only explanation. Initially Brittany is in tears, desperately scared for Justin’s life. But she asks the fuck is going on? Where’s the blood trail? There is no way he went for help – has he been taken? Celine is also scared for Justin and beats up on Bruno, laying the blame squarely on him. “If Justin is dead because of you, I will slice your balls off. And not in a good way.”
Now Justin has gone, she no longer pretends to care about these people. She also blames Brittany – “If you hadn’t stolen Justin from me, we wouldn’t have come on this trip with you losers, it would have just been the two of us and shit for brains here wouldn’t have been driving and we wouldn’t have crashed, and Justin wouldn’t be…” She can’t say the word and breaks down.
Brittany tries to get her shit together, realizing this situation got very real very quickly. Bruno says they must have hit a rock. Brittany checks out the tires, seeing that they were sliced by something sharp – this was no rock, they must have driven over some spikes or something. There is nothing in the road, though, no spikes, no rock either… Brittany says why would someone lay a trap like that?
Aubrey’s cocky self-assuredness is gone, and he laments that the only person who knows what the fuck they’re doing out here in the sticks is gone. Brittany takes charge, but Bruno teases her, we’re not your students, miss.
Aubrey goes for a piss (I have an enlarged prostate, OK, I can’t help it. Man, you’ve got an enlarged sense of your own worth, that’s what you’ve got, says Bruno). Shania begs him not to go, just go behind that bush, he whispers that he needs a number two and says, what’s the worst that can happen?
Horror situation: They wake up from a horrible accident with Justin mysteriously missing, having left behind a lot of blood.
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock at what has happened – they just survived a horrible accident, but Justin has disappeared, leaving a lot of blood behind.
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension – was this an accident? Justin is gone, but there is no blood trail and the tires were purposely slashed by something in the road.
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear: did someone do this on purpose?
EXT. CLEARING – DAY
Aubrey walks into a clearing away from the others, to find a suitable dumping place, but almost gets killed in a fiendish trap. He steps on the trap mechanism, which makes a clicking noise that makes Aubrey move to one side, just in time, as a spear flies out of the ground and just grazes his knee. He cries out in shock and pain and the others quickly come to investigate.
They all take close look at the trap – Brittany takes the lead. She says this isn’t a regular hunter’s trap. It is very well made and fiendishly clever – none of them has seen a trap like this before. It looks designed to kill people, not animals. Bruno laughs it off – he’s not ready to believe this.
Horror situation: Aubrey walks into a lethal trap and narrowly escapes with his life
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense as Aubrey steps on the trap and sets it off
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise and shock as the trap fires a spear at him, grazing his leg
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as they gradually realize that someone is out to get them
EXT. CAMP – DAY
They go back to their camp: While Aubrey escaped with just a minor flesh wound, this makes him even more of a whining annoyance. Brittany, Celine and Aubrey think that they are being hunted, but Shania, still won’t accept it. We’re not in Texas! This isn’t a massacre, it’s just hunting season and we got unlucky, that’s all. We got into an accident because someone was driving too fast, and Aubrey walked into a hunter’s trap. It will all be fine once Justin gets back.
Celine rips into her: Justin lost like a gallon of blood and then just disappeared without leaving a blood trail – do you think he somehow patched himself off before setting off to find help? Yes, I do, Justin’s a real outdoors guy – he’ll have used his first aid kit to cover his wound and… Brittany shows her the first aid kit. It hasn’t been touched. Get real – he’s not coming back!
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Bruno decides to be all macho and go off in search of food. He has a spear gun and some spears and sets off looking to hunt for “a deer or something”. Brittany knows this is a bad idea but wants to keep an eye on him and recce the area “It would be good to get a lay of the land”. Celine also goes with them, Shania stays with Aubrey, who has no intention of going anywhere or doing anything. “Did you bring snacks, baby?” “Of course I did, sweetie.”
EXT. WILDERNESS _ DAY
Brittany and Celine are arguing behind Bruno, Celine now convinced that Justin is dead.
Bruno turns around, annoyed with all this bickering and asks them to shut up – how the hell are we supposed to kill a deer with you making all this noise? And anyway, I thought you were over Justin? As Bruno turns his head around to talk to them, he walks backwards. He trips a wire and as he turns around, a huge axe swings down from the tree above him and splits his head in two.
As he falls backwards to the ground, he fires the spear gun into the air. The two women stare at Bruno for a moment, stunned, not believing what they’ve just seen. Suddenly, the spear comes back to earth, landing in Bruno’s chest. They both scream fuuuuuuuck! Now it is undeniable: these traps have been laid to kill them – they are being hunted and the killer is nowhere to be seen.
The two women leave Bruno there and head back to the camp, after picking up his spear gun and wrenching the spear out of him. They are both horrified, and Celine blames Brittany for everything, she just won’t stop bickering.
Horror situation: Bruno is killed by a horrible trap that is clearly aimed at people, not animals
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror as Bruno’s head is sliced in two
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Panic at the horrific scene they have just witnessed
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear that someone is out there coming for them all
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought!
EXT. WILDERNESS TRAIL – DAY
They walk along the trail in trepidation, scared to death that they will set off another trap and die. For a while they follow behind a rabbit, but it dies when it is blown up by a landmine. They try to make their way back to the original trail they took to get here, but Brittany walks into a wire, which sets off another trap. She trips on a rock and falls just in time. Five arrows all whistle over her, all coming from different directions, missing her by inches. That was close.
But there is a scream behind her – Celine has been hit by an arrow – clean through her left boob. Brittany finds one of the crossbows that fired one of the arrows – this is a really intricate trap. Someone really wants us dead. They head back to the camp, Celine refusing Brittany’s help – I got shot in my boob, not my leg, I can walk just fine!
Horror situation: Two more murderous traps are set off
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise and horror as the rabbit is blown up and its entrails splatter the two women
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension as they try to avoid another trap
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear that they will both die out here
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock when Brittany sets off another trap and Celine is shot
EXT. CAMP – DAY
They get back to the camp and tell Shania and Aubrey about what happened. Aubrey is freaked out and is also devastated at losing his other best friend. When Shania tries to convince them these are probably just some animal traps set by hunters, Celine points to her breast arrow and asks if this looks like the work of a hunter. Aubrey explodes sarcastically, and Shania says fuck you and walks away. Brittany convinces Shania that these are no hunters’ traps, there’s a maniac out there, the sooner you accept that, the better the chance we have of surviving. Brittany snaps the arrow and takes it out of Celine’s boob and helps her to patch it up.
EXT. CAMP – DAY (Cont.)
Brittany gets them all to start looting the car for anything that might protect them, then regroup: – we need to be able to fight this fucker. They regroup and show their weapons. Aubrey has a BB gun, shows it off, Celine asks if that’s a BB gun? Yes, yes it is. God help us. “This could take someone’s eye out.” Celine has a pair of tweezers, (“You’re gonna pluck his eyebrows to death? asks Aubrey. “Shut up BB boy. These are fucking sharp tweezers”). Brittany has the spear gun and a large hunting knife (she offers the knife to Celine who refuses, saying she is just fine with her tweezers, thank you very much). Shania says, I’ve got Lucy. Lucy? She pulls out a .44 Magnum. WTF?
She tells them of when she was younger, she got attacked by two men who tried to drag her into an alleyway. Thankfully, unbeknown to Shania, her mum was psychopathically over-protective and she used to follow her when she went out at night. “My mom shot them both in the ass, then taught me how to shoot. I’ve been packin’ ever since. They rest up for the night in their makeshift camp. Aubrey: you think you know somebody… You didn’t know she has a gun? I had no idea!
EXT. CAMP – NIGHT
As the four survivors sleep, a figure lurks in the camp: it could easily kill them but doesn’t. We only see its shadow. It lurks around the women, sniffing them and licking their necks and arms. As it walks away, it snaps a twig. Quick as a flash, Shania sits up and fires a few shots into the dark. There are two cries of pain. “I got the bastard!” and the others wake up really quickly. Aubrey limps back to the camp, “Don’t shoot!” a bullet having grazed his leg. He had gone behind a bush for a pee. But he did see a shadowy figure get shot. He didn’t go down, but he took a bullet.
Brittany says we’ll go after him in the morning. Celine wants to go now, Brittany says off you go, chasing off after a psycho killer who’s been laying traps for us, in the dark. Fair point. Bitch. One of us has to stay awake, I’ll take first turn, holding the spear gun. She won’t take the gun, scared she’ll kill someone with it. That’s kinda the point. Aubrey finally tries to be macho, there’s no way I’ll be able to sleep now, I’ll take first watch.
Horror situation: The killer comes into their camp
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Creepy moment when the killer is sniffing and licking the women
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Dread that he might kill one or more of them
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock when Shania shoots Aubrey
EXT. CAMP – EARLY MORNING
Brittany wakes up and sees that Aubrey is indeed asleep, cradling the spear gun in his arms. Pissed off, she wakes him and the others up, let’s eat then let’s take the fight to this bastard. They all start eating from the food coolers they brought with them.
ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
EXT. WILDERNESS TRAIL – DAY
Armed as well as they can be, they follow the blood trail left by the killer. Brittany beats a path with a very long stick. The trail dries up, but they see smoke and come to a very dilapidated house.
EXT. DILAPIDATED HOUSE – DAY
Three small, ragged-looking children play in the yard with a gun. One of them waves it around and accidentally shoots it, closely missing one of the other kids, who only has one ear. “If you go shooting my other ear off, Annie,” she cries. “Vickie will kill you!”
The survivors can’t believe that this could be the killer’s home – there are children here! At the sound of the gunshot, a young woman, VICKIE, comes out of the house, angry and afraid, and shouts at the kids, What have I told you about playing with guns on a Sunday? She stops when she sees the strangers. They ask if she has seen someone come by with a wound – they tell her they are being hunted. She shakes her head but says there are a lot of hunters out these parts, but I ain’t seen nobody for weeks.
They ask her for help but she says she ain’t got no phone and don’t want to get involved. If there are hunters out there, she has to think of the kids. Shania asks if they can stay with her – the woman looks scared – no, I don’t know you, I can’t have strangers coming into my house. I’m sorry. Y’all gotta leave. Aubrey: anyone else getting a hills have eyes vibe? No? just me? Fuck. They leave.
Horror situation: They find a creepy family living in a shack
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Creepy moment when the child almost shoots its sibling
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense: is this the killer’s family?
INT. HOUSE – DAY
Vickie comes inside the ramshackle house and talks to her brother, EARL. He heard the conversation. She thinks Lonnie has been killing people. Trapping them. Last night’s dinner wasn’t no carrion. Earl is furious. He’s killing again. I’ll go find him.
EXT. WILDERNESS TRAIL – DAY
On the way back to the camp, Brittany and Celine set off traps: Shania prevents Celine from being killed, though Celine is maimed (again) and Brittany miraculously survives, although her leg is snapped in two. She straps a piece of wood to it with a couple of belts, but she is horribly wounded.
Aubrey says fuck this, come on, Shania, she says no, we’ve got to help them, he says fuck that, come ON. Shania shouts at him, don’t be such a fucking coward! Wanting to live does not make me a coward. See you back at the camp. She shouts after after him, incensed, he wavers, but then turns and runs, falling into a pit of snakes. Lying there, he is winded and doesn’t realize he is surrounded by very angry serpents.
Shania’s initial reaction is to jump into the pit to help Aubrey, but Celine of all people stops her. Shania struggles to hold her shit together, she is terrified for Aubrey. Aubrey sweetie, are you OK? He stirs a little, still stunned. He is about to sit up but she quickly calls out, don’t move! He replies brusquely “Don’t tell me what to do, I’m fine to move. You’re always telling me what to do…” As he moves to get up, several of the snakes bite him. He screams as other snakes attack and soon he falls silent. Shania struggles in Celine’s arms then breaks down, not quite able to believe what she’s just seen. She holds her belly.
Horror situation: Celine and Brittany are injured by traps, Aubrey falls into a pit of snakes
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise as Celine and Brittany set off traps
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror at Brittany’s nasty injury – she snaps her leg in two
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Dread and fear for Shania after Aubrey falls into the pit
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror when Aubrey is killed by the snakes
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock for Shania at what has happened – her unborn baby’s father has just died in a horrible way, right in front of her
EXT. CAMP – DAY
Back at the camp, Celine roots around in her bag, then takes hold of Shania and pops a pill in her mouth – swallow. Brittany says, come on sweetie, we need you. We have to fight this fucker.
Brittany says she has a plan.
EXT. WILDERNESS TRAIL – EVENING
Lonnie comes along the track where they all got trapped and finds Aubrey still in the pit, his face contorted in a complaining expression. We see Lonnie’s silhouette; he is dressed like a ragged pianist, with top hat and tails but no shoes. He walks in a very menacing fashion, confident and dangerous, carrying a vicious-looking long hook with a rope attached to it, which he aims to use to pull Aubrey out of the pit, and another metal hook hangs from his belt.
As he starts to pull Aubrey’s body out of the pit, he is shot by a bullet and then by a spear. Shania comes out of hiding with her gun firing. As Lonnie’s face lifts and we finally see it – a hideous, deformed child-like in-bred face. He manages to get away but is bleeding badly. Shania shoots again and he takes one in the shoulder.
Horror situation: We finally meet the monster
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Monster reveal: we see Lonnie, a creepy-looking weirdo
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Dread at what this deformed creep is capable of
EXT. WOODED AREA – EVENING
He leads them into some covered woods and Brittany almost falls into a trap, but teeters on the edge, trying not to fall in. Celine pushes her in. Shania screams, Celine! And shoots Celine, in the other breast, and Celine runs away, cursing her. Shania helps Brittany out of the trap: she is, unbelievably, still alive, but this time with her arm snapped in half. She shrugs it off.
Horror situation: Betrayal as Celine pushes Brittany into a trap
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Shock at Celine’s attempt to kill Brittany
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror at Brittany’s new injury, her arm being snapped in half
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear for the fight ahead
EXT. WILDERNESS CLEARING – EVENING
Lonnie has caught up with Celine and they are fighting, but with both of them very injured it is hard for each of them to deal a final blow. He is hideous – he looks like an in-bred child in the face, but with a man’s body comically and hideously deformed.
Lonnie is badly shot up, with one arm useless, while Celine is bleeding from both breasts. He draws back his hook to kill her, but Celine stabs him in the eye with her tweezers. He screams, drops the hook and slowly pulls out the tweezers, which pops his eyeball out. He looks at the eye for a second, pulls it off the tweezers and stuffs it back in his eye socket. He turns back to Celine, who has been watching this with morbid curiosity. He then proceeds to stab Celine in the chest with the tweezers.
He stops when Celine appears to be dead and looks up in time to see Brittany and Shania hobbling towards him (Shania helping Brittany to walk). Lonnie goes after them, very slowly, brandishing his hook in one hand and the tweezers in the other.
Brittany can’t do much, but Shania shoots him twice before running out of bullets. Lonnie keeps coming and hits Shania, knocking her to the ground. Brittany is also on the floor now, unable to get up with her snapped leg, but she screams at him, come on you bastard, I’ll bite your legs off. I’ll rip your fucking heart out with my teeth!
Lonnie stands over Brittany, raises his hook and is about to deliver the final blow… She summons up all her strength and kicks him in the balls with her one good leg. She is an amazing example of the sheer willpower to live. Lonnie falls to the floor, Brittany kneels on her good leg, lifts up the hook with her good arm and is about to plunge it into him when a gunshot goes off. It is Lonnie’s brother and sister, with crazy feral kids in tow.
Earl has shot into the air and now points the rifle at Brittany. Just leave him now, he won’t bother you no more, we’ll make sure of that. We’re not bad people. Lonnie just likes to bend the rules a little. Vickie helps Lonnie up and takes him away. Earl says come with me, I’ll help you get home. The two women look at each other, unwilling to trust him. “I’m not like my brother, I’m no killer. And if I wanted you dead, you’d be dead.”
Horror situation: Celine is murdered by Lonnie and Shania and Brittany have to fight him
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror and panic for Celine as she fights Lonnie
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Creepy moment when Lonnie’s eye pops out and he pops it back in
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Horror when Lonnie stabs Celine to death with a pair of tweezers
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear and panic when Lonnie comes after the two women and seems to be unstoppable
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Anguish when he easily knocks Shania to the floor
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Fear that both women will be killed by Lonnie
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Panic as Brittany musters her last strength to take down Lonnie
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Surprise when Earl shoots his gun into the air
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Release when Lonnie’s family say they’ve come to take him away
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Suspense as the women don’t trust Lonnie’s brother and can’t be sure that he won’t kill them
EXT. CLEARING – EVENING
Earl leads them to a trail and points to a wheelbarrow. I’ve got some transportation you can borrow. Brittany climbs in and Earl points to the trail. Follow that trail for a couple miles, you’ll come to a road. Cars come along there once in a while. The women set off, silently.
Horror situation: The women come face to face with the killer’s family
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Release that they are being shown a way home
[if !supportLists]· [endif]Apprehension that Lonnie or his brother may still come after them
EXT. DIRT ROAD – EVENING
Shania, her head covered in blood, and Brittany, hardly conscious, slowly make their way to the end of the trail, which brings them to a road. They eventually manage to flag down a car. As they tell the driver what happened, a beaten-up pickup truck slowly drives in the other direction. They see Lonnie and his siblings in the front, and the feral kids and a very large freezer on the back.
Horror situation: They see the family leave and realize Lonnie will be free to kill again
Dread that Lonnie is still out there
Horror as they realize that their dead friends’ bodies are in the freezer and will be the family’s main course for some days to come
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Madeleine Vessel’s Horror Outline Version 1
What I learned doing this assignment is using the horror map and fleshing out horror situations really brings the story together. While my outline is rough at this time, it’s definitely the seed of a full-blown horror script. YAY!
HORROR OUTLINE
1. INT. ABBOTT LIVINGROOM – DAY (LATE AFTERNOON)
The Abbott family (GRACE and FRANK – parents) and their girls (KATHRYN, 14, and MALLORY, 12, watch TV news. The newsman reports that a boy, MAX BRACKETT, 14, was found dead in the snow on the grounds of Glenbrook Middle School. Law enforcement suspects hypothermia.
Mallory freaks out because she knew Max, a talented wood carver.
Kathryn watches the snow falling outside. She asks her mother if they can get a ride, but both Grace and Frank have other plans. Grace assures the girls she will pick them up after the party. “Call me when you’re ready to come home,” she says.
After Mallory checks herself in the mirror one last time, the girls head out into the snow.
NOTE: OPENING SCENE:
Horror Situation: Tormented/spooked” A teenage boy is found dead, possibly from hypothermia.
· SHOCK: Mallory and Kathryn know the dead boy.
· FEAR: The idea of a boy their age dying in the snow frightens both Mallory and Kathryn, especially as they are about to set out in it to a friend’s birthday party.
· SUSPENSE: Will they make it safely to the birthday party.
2. EXT. GLENBROOK MIDDLE SCHOOL – NIGHT
Kathryn and Mallory pass Glenbrook Middle School on their way to BEDELIA UMBRA’S 13<sup>th</sup> birthday party. Police crime scene tape still cordons off the spot where Max’s body was found. Mallory finds a pocketknife nearby. She recognizes it as belonging to Max. Kathryn tells her to put it back where she found it. Mallory pretends to do just that, but secretly, she pockets the knife. Unbeknownst to the girls, Max’s ghost follows them.
3. EXT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – NIGHT
The girls pass by Old Lady Setter’s house. They see her leaving the house with a suitcase.
4. INT. UMBRA HOUSE – NIGHT
At the birthday party, everyone exclaims over Mallory’s clothes and makeup. She basks in their admiration. Vanity, vanity.
5. INT. UMBRA HOUSE – NIGHT
At the birthday party, Bedelia opens a gift from her mother, LILI. It’s a Ouija board. Immediately, Bedelia wants to play with it. Kathryn, who is Catholic, aghast. Max, who has been hovering around Mallory, also shrinks back. Kathryn whispers in Mallory’s ear that they are not permitted to play. Mallory refuses to heed Kathryn’s warning. She doesn’t believe in that taboo. “It’s just a game,” she says. “What harm could it do?”
All the girls except Kathryn are lured into playing with the Ouija Board. Kathryn silently calls on St. Michael the Archangel to defend them from evil.
Mallory takes her turn at the Ouija Board. She asks the Ouija Board, “When will I die?” The Board answers, “On your 13<sup>th</sup> birthday. Mallory loses it.
Kathryn tries to calm Mallory down. She says, “The Ouija board’s trying to scare you.” When Mallory won’t calm down, Kathryn announces that they will walk home. The girls head out into the dark and the snow. Kathryn prays the rosary as they go.
Horror Situation: Tormented/spooked: The Ouija board tells Mallory she’s going to die before she’s 13, which is the following day. She’s spooked.
· APPREHENSION: The Ouija board is associated with the devil.
· SHOCK: When the Ouija board tells Mallory she will die before the next day, she loses it.
· SUSPENSE: As the girls step out into the night, snow falling, Mallory must be wondering if she really will die before midnight. And if so, how?
6. EXT. SHORTCUT THROUGH A WOOD – NIGHT
The girls take a shortcut through the woods and get caught in blizzard conditions. Looking for shelter, they come across Old Lady Setter’s house. On the porch, a light is on. Through a window, the girls see a light on inside.
Mallory wants to go inside. “Old Lady Setter isn’t home. She’ll never know.” She seeks and finds a window unlatched and with its bars open. Kathryn tries to stop her, but Mallory climbs in. Reluctantly Kathryn climbs in after her. Max enters behind her.
7. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Once inside the house, the window falls down behind them and locks by itself. Then bars close over the window and lock. Kathryn tries to unlock the window to no avail. She tells Mallory it must be rusty. She tells Mallory, they should check the front door and make sure it opens. When they reach the front door, it won’t open. Mallory freaks.
Horror Situation: Isolated/trapped: Kathryn and Mallory find themselves inside Old Lady Setter’s House and there seems to be no way out.
· FEAR: The window and window bar covering lock by themselves.
· SUSPENSE: They make their way to the door, checking windows on the way. All the windows they pass and the front door are securely locked and will not open despite Kathryn’s best efforts.
· DREAD: There may be no way for the girls to get out of the house.
8. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
The living room is an antique showroom. One of the antiques on display is a baby grand piano. Nearby that is a candelabra complete with candles and a box of matches at hand.
Mallory, who knows how to play, sits down in front of the piano. It’s an old Steinway. She puts her fingers on the keys and starts to play. No sound comes out.
When Kathryn joins her, she sees the problem with the piano. The ghost of a teenage girl lies across the strings of the piano. Kathryn sees the last moments of the ghost girl’s life in a vision. She was a child prodigy who died of a drug overdose at a fraternity party in 1967. One bad choice, and she was dead.
The ghost girl is Frances. She tells Kathryn to tell Mallory to take her hands off the piano.
Kathryn distracts Mallory by turning her attention to an ornate wall mirror. Mallory preens in front o fthe mirror until behind her she sees Frances lying across the piano strings. Turns out Mallory can see ghosts when they are reflected in a mirror. She freaks.
Kathryn calms Mallory down then looks at other items on display. One is a M1917 doughboy helmet, used by U. S. soldiers in World War I, she sees in a vision that it belonged to a soldier killed by a bullet to the chest at Argonne in France. He was 19 years old and unlucky enough to be caught up in the deadliest battle of the war.
Touching a steering wheel, she sees in a vision that it’s from a 1922 Sunbeam that crashed during a pick-up road race, killing the driver, an adventurer and risk-taker, who died at the age of 23.
Shivering, Kathryn takes out her rosary. The visions go away.
Then, suddenly, all the lights go out.
Mallory screams. Kathryn calms her down. “It’s the storm. I’ll check the circuit breakers.”
Feeling her way back to the candelabra, Kathryn lights the candles and carries into one room and then another. Mallory frantically sticks to her side.
Finally, they find the circuit breaker box. Kathryn checks the circuit breakers. None are blown.
Kathryn takes out her mobile phone. “We need to call Mom.” But there’s no phone service.
Mallory takes out her phone, tries to call home. It doesn’t work either.
Horror Situation: Isolated/spooked: The girls are trapped in a locked, ghost infested house, and no one knows where they are.
· FEAR: They meet a ghost girl, FRANCES, whom Mallory can only see as a reflection in a mirror. Then the lights go out. They try their mobile phones, but there’s no phone service.
· SUSPENSE: The lights go out. They try their mobile phone, but there’s no phone service.
· DREAD: They’re trapped in a haunted house, and no one knows where they are.
9. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – BATHROOM – NIGHT
In the bathroom, Kathryn holds the lit candelabra while Mallory uses the toilet. It’s the only warm room in the house. Kathryn shuts the door to keep in the warmth.
As Mallory preens in front of the mirror, there’s a sound behind the shower curtain. Kathryn pulls back the curtain and sees Max hiding there. He tells Kathryn that he came with them from the middle school. He wants his pocketknife back.
Kathryn confronts Mallory, takes back the pocketknife, and hands it to Max. If falls with a thud onto the shower floor.
Mallory sees Max’s reflection in the mirror and freaks.
Turns out Max doesn’t know he’s dead.
Kathryn picks up the pocketknife and realizes that Max must be attached to it in some way.
Max, hearing what she says, remembers what happened to him.
He remembers what happened to him. He’s full of anger toward his stepfather, who beat him and sent him out of the house to die. He blames his mother for allowing his stepfather to abuse him.
Now he accepts that he’s dead.
Suddenly, the temperature of the hot air coming out through the heater vents turns up. They start to perspire. Only Max is comfortable.
Kathryn opens the bathroom door. Cool air rushes in.
10. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – HALL – NIGHT
Holding the candelabra, Kathryn enters the hall and turns left. Mallory and Max follow after her.
Kathryn stops at the entrance to a kind of posh parlor. Behind her, Mallory exclaims over its splendor.
The three enter.
11. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – PARLOR – NIGHT
Inside the parlor, the ghost of a beautiful woman confronts Kathryn. Mallory senses that Kathryn sees another ghost. Max doesn’t like the color of the ghost’s aura.
The ghost of the beautiful woman, DELINDA, asks Kathryn if she wants to see something wonderful. Tentatively, Kathryn follows her to an old clothes trunk.
The lid of the trunk flips up of its own accord. Kathryn and Mallory look in. It’s full of dazzlingly beautiful ball gowns. Mallory holds one up. She wants to try it on. Max doesn’t want her to do it. Kathryn tells her it’s not a good idea. But Mallory insists.
The dress is lace-up. Mallory asks Kathryn to help her with the laces. Kathryn refuses. Max doesn’t want her lacing up the dress either.
Suddenly, Delinda swoops in and laces up the dress. Mallory is in a stranglehold. Delinda laughs wickedly.
Kathryn tries to loosen the laces to no avail.
Mallory SCREAMS until there’s no air left in her lungs. She starts to turn blue.
Kathryn loses it. Her sister is dying before her very eyes.
Max urges Kathryn to use his pocketknife.
As Kathryn frees Mallory, other ghosts appear out of the woodwork. They are all raging, throwing things, threatening. Kathryn puts away the pocketknife and pulls out her rosary beads.
The ghosts retreat into the woodwork.
Kathryn puts away her rosary beads.
Horror Situation: Deceived/tortured: A malevolent female ghost entices Mallory into trying on a ball gown then tortures her by tying the laces tight enough to suffocate her.
· APPREHENSION: Max tells Kathryn they shouldn’t trust the female ghost (Delinda). He doesn’t like the color of Delinda’s aura.
· SUSPENSE: Despite Kathryn’s warnings for her not to, Mallory tries on a ball gown that Delinda encourages her to wear.
· SHOCK: When Kathryn refuses to help Mallory tie the ball gown’s laces, Delinda takes over. As the laces tighten, Mallory faints, turns blue, threatens to die.
12. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – PARLOR – NIGHT
As Malory comes to, a clock chimes. It’s a quarter hour before midnight.
Remembering the Ouija board’s prediction, Mallory is convinced she has only 15 minutes to live.
She loses it. SCREAMS BLOODY MURDER.
A dark fog seeps out from behind the window curtain and appears in front of Kathryn and Mallory.
“I am Legion. You are mine.”
Immediately Legion possesses Mallory.
Kathryn begs Legion to leave Mallory and enter her instead.
Legion obliges, suddenly diving out of Mallory into Kathryn. Kathryn is possessed.
Finding herself all alone with a ghost and a possessed sister, Mallory loses it.
When she runs out of breath, Mallory contemplates. Then she does what she never does. She prays. Taking the rosary from Kathryn’s pocket, “I believe in God the Father…
Max joins Mallory in prayer.
Horror Situation: Tormented/Possessed: The demons named Legion possess Mallory, who is vulnerable to possession because she is convinced she will die before she turns 13.
· ANGUISH: Kathryn reacts to Mallory’s conviction that she’s going to die.
· PANIC: The demons, Legion, say, “You are mine.”
· HORROR: Legion possesses first Mallory then Kathryn.
· HYSTERIA: Mallory loses it when she sees Kathryn, whom she depends upon, in the control of demons.
13. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – FOYER – NIGHT
There’s a sound of a key in the front door. Suddenly, everything in the house puts itself to right. Old Lady Setter enters. “Anybody there?”
The demon, LEGEND, exits Kathryn and flees in terror.
14. INT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – PARLOR – NIGHT
Old Lady Setter enters the parlor to find Kathryn and Mallory huddled together in terror.
Mrs. Setter doesn’t seem surprised to find Kathryn and Mallory in the house.
She gives Kathryn a box, tells her to give it to her mother, then shows the girls to the door.
The girls disappear into the night with Max following after them.
15. EXT./INT. ABBOTT HOUSE – NIGHT
Kathryn and Mallory and Max arrive home to find Grace and Frank out of their minds with fear that something terrible happened to the girls.
The girls find out that the police are out searching for them.
Mallory realize the error of her ways.
Kathryn realizes that Mallory does not need her anymore.
16. INT. POLICE STATION – DAY
Malory and Kathryn go to the police.
Kathryn tells the police about what she knows about Max’s situation.
The story of Max’s abuse is exposed on TV news. His stepfather is arrested.
17. EXT./INT. THE BRACKETT HOUSE – DAY
Kathryn, accompanied by Mallory and Max take the pocketknife Max’s mother.
Max sees his mother is in a terrible, grieving state and has pity on her. He forgives her for everything.
Immediately, Max’s spirit goes poof. He’s gone, hopefully to heaven.
18. EXT. OLD LADY SETTER’S HOUSE – DAY
On their way home from the Brackett house, the girls pass by Old Lady Setter’s house. They see her leaving the house with a suitcase.
They quicken their pace.
Old Lady Setter passes them in her car. She waves at them. They wave back.
They turn and look back at Old Lady Setter’s House and see a light turn on in the window.
They girls look at one another and then tear off running for home.
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MICAH’S HORROR OUTLINE VERSION 1
What I learned doing this assignment is the value of being able to scan through my outline and see where all my horror situations are.
EXT. BARREN PROPERTY – DAY
A boy and a girl play near a barren hill on witch is an old house. An old woman warns them off going onto the property.
INT. HERMIT’S HOUSE – DAY
All the mirrors are broken. The Hermit sits in a chair, cursing a wryneck bird that perches on a chair, watching him.
INT. HOME – NIGHT
The boy’s Father explains to keep away from the property, and that the Hermit isn’t bad but a very unlucky man.
EXT. BARREN PROPERTY – DAY
The boy plays with his dog. It runs onto the property and the boy pursues.
INT. HERMIT’S HOUSE
The Hermit hears the boy outside and goes to the window.
EXT. BARREN PROPERTY – DAY
The Hermit cries out for the boy to leave. Other townsfolk hear and call for the boy, but dare not go after him.
The boy’s leg plunges into a gopher hole and breaks. His dog comes to help, but is attacked and killed by a wolf. A pack of wolves surrounds the boy.
The Hermit leaves his house to aid the boy and is shot dead by the Father, who has retrieved a rifle. The wolves run off.
Holding on the dead Hermit’s face, we hear: FELIX: “Some people have all the luck.”
HORROR SITUATION: The boy unwittingly enters zone of evil supernatural influence
Anxiety: The boy has been warned that it is dangerous to go onto the property, but does anyway.
Monster Reveal: The evil has a range of influence
Surprise: The boy’s leg goes into the gopher hole
Shock: The dog is attacked by a wolf and killed
Suspense: The wolves close in on the boy
Anguish: The townsfolk, including the boy’s parents, dare not go to help him
Hysteria: The boy’s mother needs to be held back to keep from going to him
Shock: The Hermit is shot by the father
Release: the wolves disperse
Monster Reveal: the evil is dispelled once the person it is tied to is killed
EXT. BASEBALL DIAMOND – DAY
Felix narrates about the nature of luck. Little Felix runs to catch a ball, slips and breaks his arm.
EXT. BASEBALL DIAMOND – DAY
Little Felix is in a cast, watching the game sadly from the dugout.
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL – DAY
Young Felix is picked on.
EXT. DRIVE-IN – NIGHT
Young Felix sits alone in his car, while two teens are fucking in the car next to him.
INT. PARTY HOUSE
Felix and Young Tina get drunk.
INT. BEDROOM
Felix and Tina make out on the bed.
INT. BATHROOM
Felix and Tina behold a positive pregnancy test.
PHOTO MONTAGE: wedding photos, baby photos, little June growing up, Felix passing the bar(?) and opening up a practice as a contract lawyer, things turning for the worse, the housing market crash, Covid, Felix loses his father, he and Tina fight, they split up.
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE
Felix is shown a CAT scan by his doctor and sees a brain tumor.
End of narration.
INT. FELIX’S KITCHEN – NIGHT
Felix sits alone, eating Chinese food and reading about inoperable tumors on the internet. He makes the comment that he wishes he could give someone else his luck right as he opens one of three fortune cookies. The fortune states: “You can.” Felix opens the next one. It reads: “Answer the door.”
There’s a faint tapping at the door.
EXT. FELIX’S PORCH – NIGHT
A wryneck bird surprises Felix.
INT. FELIX’S KITCHEN – NIGHT
Felix gets the last cookie, opens it: “Make the deal.”
EXT. FELIX’S PORCH – NIGHT
Felix agrees to whatever deal the bird is offering. It attacks and scratches him, then disappears. The scratch is gone.
INT. FELIX’S KITCHEN – NIGHT
Felix checks his face in the window and finds no scratch. He looks at the fortunes; they’re all normal. Felix glances at the symptoms of brain tumors on his computer and sees “hallucinations.” He weeps.
HORROR SITUATION: Felix makes a deal with the Jinx.
Creepy Moment: The fortune cookies seem to be answering Felix’s thoughts. One of the fortunes him tells him to answer the door right before there’s a knock at the door.
Monster Reveal: a wryneck bird, like the one seen with the Hermit, is on the doorstep.
Creepy Moment: the last fortune cookie tells Felix to make a deal.
Surprise: Once Felix agrees to the ambiguous deal, the bird flies at him and scratches him.
Creepy Moment: the scratch disappears and the fortunes have become normal
Anguish: Felix thinks his tumor is causing him to hallucinate
INT. FELIX’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Tina arrives to have Felix sign the divorce papers. She notes that it’s cold when she stands near Felix.
Tina senses something wrong, that he’s wearing glasses now, that he seems groggy, but he tells her it’s nothing, he just has a headache. Felix is disappointed that June won’t come in to see him.
INT. CAR – DAY
June waits in the car, texting with her boyfriend.
INT. FELIX’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Tina expresses concerns about June’s older boyfriend. She stubs her toe.
EXT. FELIX’S HOUSE – DAY
Felix goes to get the mail and talks to his neighbor. As they chat, a mailman going by is drenched when the sprinklers come on. Then a passing car knocks the side mirror off the neighbor’s parked car.
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE
The doctor notes that it’s cold in his office. Felix tells him he’s been feeling a little better, and the doctor expresses that his treatment has been going much better than expected.
EXT. FELIX’S HOUSE – DAY
Felix is talking with his neighbor again, who notes that it’s cold near Felix, though his wife across the fence doesn’t feel it.
The neighbor’s brother-in-law begins to back out of the driveway, unaware that his five-year-old nephew is in his path. Felix sees this at the last second. The boy’s mother throws herself against the back of the car, being knocked down as her brother hits the breaks. Crisis averted.
HORROR SITUATION: the brother-in-law is about to back the car over a young child
Monster Reveal: the neighbor notes the cold near Felix, a telltale sign of the Jinx’s influence; however, his wife further away does not feel the cold.
Suspense: the brother-in-law gets in the car, not realizing his five-year-old nephew is directly behind the car in the driveway
Dread: the car backs toward the child
Panic: Felix sees what’s about to happen and begins to cry out
Shock: The boy’s mother jumps behind the car and is knocked down
Release: the brother-in-law slams on the breaks before the child is harmed.
INT. JUNE’S BEDROOM
June and Ivar make out, though he slows things down. June expresses her upsetmet over her parents’ divorce. She makes Ivar promise never to leave her. She has the idea to sneak out and go to a hotel
EXT. HOTEL – DAY
Establish dilapidated hotel in the shitty part of town. A pregnant woman, CANDYCE, gets a case out of her car and enters.
INT. LOBBY
Lily checks in Mr. Lamb, who insists on tipping her even though she says it’s against policy. He goes up to his room.
Nico and Candyce check in. Nico is grumpy, Candyce lighthearted. Candyce makes a joke to Lily, who is confused by Candyce’s pregnancy.
INT. ALFRED’S ROOM
Alfred sits on the bed, looking sadly at a picture of his wife. There’s a gun in his suitcase.
INT. LOBBY
Nico, who doesn’t like elevators, asks where the stairs are. She enters one staircase, then returns irritated. This staircase is only for the odd numbered floors. She finds the even floor stairs.
INT. EVEN STAIRWELL
The stairs creak a lot as Nico ascends.
INT. FELIX’S LIVING ROOM
Felix is marveling that he no longer needs to wear his glasses (or some other sign of recovery) when Tina calls. She doesn’t know where June is, and doesn’t have the tracker app on her phone. Felix checks his phone and sees she’s gone to a hotel. He tells Tina he’ll take care of it.
INT. CANDYCE AND NICO’S ROOM
Candyce lights candles and tries to get Nico in a romantic mood.
EXT. INTERSECTION NEAR HOTEL – DAY
It’s cloudy overhead, and there’s a low rumble of thunder. Felix is waiting at a traffic light when a big rig turns on its side and crashes in the intersection, blocking the street to the hotel. No one is hurt.
HORROR MOMENT: a big rig crashes
Shock: the tire on the big rig blows
Suspense: it careens into the intersection, other cars swerving
Release: the driver climbs out, unharmed
Felix gets out of his car and jogs down the street to the hotel.
EXT. HOTEL – DAY
The wryneck watches as he enters.
INT. LOBBY
Lily’s pen leaks onto her hand as Felix approaches her. She also notices a chill. Felix shows her a picture of June and asks if she’s in the hotel. When Lily says she can’t divulge information about guests, Felix tells her that if she doesn’t comply she’ll be party to statutory rape. A flustered Lily acquiesces.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Mallory is on the phone with her mother when Felix comes off the elevator and suddenly her connection dies. She freaks when she sees a cockroach.
Felix hears the sounds of sex coming from a room and knocks on the door.
INT. PEARL AND AUTUMN’S ROOM
Pearl and Autumn are having sex in their room. Their condom breaks and Autumn rushes to the bathroom.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Lily tells Felix it’s the wrong room, and leads him to the correct one. Ivar answers the door in his boxers, surprised to see Felix, who pushes past him.
INT. JUNE AND IVAR’S ROOM
Felix finds June wrapped in a sheet and tells her to get dressed. Both she and Ivar try to explain, but Felix is having none of it. Ivar knocks over a lamp and sets it back up without the shade.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The argument spills out into the hallway as Felix drags June away.
Alfred enters the hallway and tries to calm everyone, advising Ivar to back down.
INT. PEARL AND AUTUMN’S ROOM
Pearl snorts cocaine. Autumn re-enters and asks him what all the noise is outside.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Autumn, Pearl, Candyce, Nico, and Mallory all come to check on the scene.
Alfred’s pacemaker fails and he has a heart attack. Mallory realizes what’s happening, tells someone to call an ambulance while she gets something from her room.
INT. MALLORY’S ROOM
Mallory gets a medical thing from her room, not realizing that the bottle of naxolone drops to the floor.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Mallory applies the medical thing to try and alleviate the attack. Felix gets off the phone, but remembers the accident at the intersection and realizes an ambulance won’t be able to get through. They decide to carry Alfred downstairs so they can get him to Felix’s car.
The elevator busts. They have to take the stairs.
INT. EVEN STAIRWELL
As they head down the stairs, the stairwell collapses, Mallory nearly falls, but Felix and Ivar help her up while Lily supports Alfred. They are forced to head back upstairs.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Alfred panics, says he’s not ready to die after all, fears there’s nothing on the other side. He dies.
HORROR SITUATION: Alfred has a heart attack and various accidents prevent anyone from getting him help
Shock: Alfred’s pacemaker fails and he begins having a heart attack
Suspense: Mallory runs to get him a medical thing that I’ll look up later
Anguish: Felix remembers that the intersection is blocked off and help won’t be arriving soon
Anxiety: the characters wait for the elevator; they hear it stop, but the door won’t open. They are forced to take the stairs.
Shock: the staircase collapses
Terror: Mallory nearly falls to her death
Release: Felix and Ivar save Mallory
Hysteria / Anguish: Alfred doesn’t want to die after all, but is slipping away; everyone watches on helpless
Character Death: Alfred
Ivar comforts a frightened June, to her father’s vexation. Mallory is hit hard. When asked if she’s a doctor, she relates that she’s a former paramedic who quit because she got tired of seeing people die.
Nico yells at Lily for the hotel’s unsafe state.
Pearl becomes panicky. Nico yells at him to be quiet. Autumn and Candyce calm their respective partners. The characters note a drop in temperature around Felix.
Nico calls the police, explaining the situation and emphasizing there’s a pregnant woman in the building.
They’re going to have to wait. Mallory asks that they move Alfred out of the hallway.
INT. ALFRED’S ROOM
They lay him on the bed. Nico notices the gun on the bed.
EXT. INTERSECTION NEAR HOTEL – NIGHT
Police are trying to move the big rig, but it’s going to take time.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Autumn talks about putting out positive vibes, to Nico’s annoyance.
Felix glances in a hallway mirror and sees his reflection start to become the Jinx. He has a sense of what’s happening, but says nothing.
HORROR SITUATION: Felix sees the Jinx for the first time
Creepy Moment: Felix sees his reflection begin to transform
Monster Reveal: the Jinx is bonded to Felix
June becomes friendly with Candyce, and asks her about the baby. Candyce makes a joke about being impregnated by a Swedish bodybuilder.
People note the cold. Ivar goes to get a blanket for June.
INT. JUNE AND IVAR’S ROOM
Felix follows Ivar and talks to him about his relationship with June. Ivar trips and falls on the lamp, breaking the bulb which punctures his throat. Felix calls for help.
INT. HALLWAY
Mallory and June rush to the room.
INT. JUNE AND IVAR’S ROOM
Mallory tries to cover Ivar’s wound, but he dies. It upsets her deeply.
June and Mallory are suspicious of Felix. He tries to comfort June, but she keeps her distance.
HORROR SITUATION: A freak accident kills Ivar
Anxiety: we now know that it’s not safe to be around Felix
Shock: Ivar trips and impales his throat on the broken bulb
Suspense: Mallory rushes to give medical aid
Character Death: Ivar bleeds to death
Anguish: both Mallory and June are upset, and both are suspicious that Felix may have killed Ivar
INT. HALLWAY
The three return, only reporting that Ivar had an accident, though Mallory keeps her eye on Felix.
Pearl babbles about conspiracy theories, suggesting they’re in some kind of controlled experiment; the elevator, the stairwell, the crash, Alfred, and Ivar can’t all be coincidences. Autumn suggests a supernatural cause, which Nico balks at.
Pearl is for getting out of dodge, and Nico agrees. If they can just get to the floor below, they can take the other staircase. They open the elevator doors and find the car stuck between this and the next floor down. Lily advises against this, citing regulations and insisting the police will be here soon. Candyce is worried but Nico assures her.
Nico and Pearl climb onto the car and open the ceiling hatch.
INT. ELEVATOR CAR
They drop down and try to pry open the doors. Only the top foot and a half of the lower floor doorway is expose. They begin trying to pry the outer doors open.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix stands near the open elevator doors.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
The cable suddenly snaps. The elevator drops several feet and the breaks take hold.
INT. ELEVATOR CAR
Now they’re halfway past the outer doors. Do they try to open them or do they retreat?
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Everyone is trying to see down into the shaft, including Felix.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
The brakes creak.
INT. ELEVATOR CAR
Pearl and Nico scramble to get out.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
Autumn and Mallory kneel down to help pull them out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix looks over his shoulder and sees the wryneck on a stand, flopping its head.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
Pearl coughs and becomes dizzy. He tries to help Nico up, but can’t.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The others turn to Felix for help, but he backs away.
June and Autumn hold onto Mallory as she leans into the shaft.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
The brakes creak and the car drops an inch. Nico runs, jumps, and is caught by Mallory, who pulls her up.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Nico climbs to safety.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
Pearl sorta comes out of his daze and tries to jump, but misses.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix backs further away.
INT. ELEVATOR SHAFT
Pearl jumps and is caught by Mallory just as the brakes fail and the car plummets. Pearl is hauled up.
HORROR SITUATION: the elevator cable breaks while Nico and Pearl are inside
Anxiety: Nico and Pearl climb into the elevator shaft in the middle of a horror movie; never a good idea
Suspense: Felix is nearby; something bad is sure to happen
Shock: the cable snaps and the car starts to fall
Suspense: Nico and Pearl aren’t sure whether to try to get the outer doors open or retreat; they go for the doors
Dread: the brakes creak
Suspense: the two evacuate the elevator car
Creepy Moment: Felix sees the wryneck watching him and flopping its head
Anguish: Mallory and Autumn can’t reach them, and Pearl begins suffering ill effects from the cocaine
Shock: the car drops an inch
Release: they manage to get Nico out
Terror: Pearl is still in the shaft
Panic: Pearl comes to his senses and tries to jump to the others
Terror: the brakes fail and the car plummets
Release: they grab hold of Pearl in the nick of time
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Mallory demands to know why Felix chickened out on them, and becomes horrified when she sees the head of his shadow flopping like the wryneck.
Confrontation. Felix tries to explain himself. Pearl freaks out. Nico threatens Felix. June defends her father.
Autumn notices the cold. She moves to the far end of the hall and feels the difference in temperature. She suggests the cold indicates the range of the Jinx’s influence.
Felix agrees to quarantine in a room, but insists that June stay on the phone with him.
NOTE: Throughout, the symptoms of Felix’s tumor (fatigue, difficulty speaking, headaches, nausea, imbalance) subside and he becomes stronger, quicker, and more focused.
INT. TBD ROOM
Felix waits alone, not knowing what to do. The wryneck appears, chirping in a way that sounds like laughing. Felix attacks the bird, chases it, eventually capturing it and killing it. It reappears elsewhere, still laughing at him.
HORROR SITUATION: the wryneck torments Felix
Creepy Moment: the bird cackles at Felix
Suspense: Felix tries to capture the bird, chasing it across the room
Release: Felix catches the bird and kills it
Creepy Moment: the bird reappears elsewhere in the room, still alive
Monster Reveal: killing the bird does not stop the Jinx
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
Nico looks out the window.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
It thunders overhead and rain falls.
Down below, guests and staff have fled the building, police and medics tending to them. Up the street, they’re still trying to drag away the big rig. Nico urges them to hurry up.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Pearl paces nervously, unaware that his shoes have come untied as he passes the elevator again and again. He’s showing early signs of overdose. Mallory questions him, but he just says he’s coming down from his high.
Candyce calms herself singing to her baby, and encourages June to join in. Pearl tells them to be quiet. Nico jumps to Candyce’s defense. There’s an argument. Autumn cuts in and tells Pearl to tie his shoes.
HORROR MOMENT: Pearl is in danger of falling down the open shaft
Anxiety: Pearl is pacing past the elevator, doesn’t realize his shoe is untied
Suspense: Pearl begins to feel ill again; he’s even more likely to fall
Release: Autumn points out his untied shoe
INT. TBD ROOM
Felix’s phone is nearing death. He finds a charger and plugs it into a power strip, the wryneck watching. There’s a spark and the power goes out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The lights go out.
They set up cell phones along the hallway to act as lights.
Cockroaches swarm over Mallory, who becomes hysterical, nearly backing into the open elevator shaft. Autumn calms her, has her step away from the shaft, and then removes the cockroaches.
HORROR SITUATION: Mallory is covered in cockroaches
Anxiety: the lights go out
Creepy Moment: cockroaches begin crawling onto Mallory
Panic / Hysteria: Mallory is terrified of insects and freaks out
Suspense: Mallory moves dangerously close to the elevator
Release: Autumn calms her
Creepy Moment: Mallory has to endure as Autumn brushes the cockroaches off her
Pearl’s overdose kicks into full swing. Recognizing the symptoms, Mallory runs to get the naxolone from her room. But Felix’s room is in between.
INT. TBD ROOM
Hearing the situation over the phone, Felix says he’ll get the naxolone.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Mallory guides Felix over the phone.
Felix exits his room and enters Mallory’s.
INT. MALLORY’S ROOM
Felix unknowing kicks the naxolone with his foot, sending it further under the bed. He can’t find it. His phone dies.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Pearl is dying. Mallory throws caution to the wind and runs for her room.
INT. MALLORY’S ROOM
They scour the room.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Pearl is losing consciousness.
INT. MALLORY’S ROOM
Mallory finds the bottle and bolts out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix follows her. Mallory trips while rushing it to Pearl and it slides toward open elevator. Seeing this, Felix retreats back toward his room.
Autumn grabs it just before it goes over the lip and rushes it to Pearl. Too late. He’s dead.
HORROR SITUATION: Pearl is dying of a drug overdose
Shock: Pearl becomes very ill, losing balance and breathing with difficulty
Suspense: Mallory recognizes that he’s having an opium overdose, probably from something mixed in with his cocaine
Fear: In order to get to the life-saving naxolone, Mallory has to pass Felix’s room
Suspense: Felix goes to the room instead, guided by Mallory over the phone
Anguish: Felix doesn’t realize he’s kicked the naxolone farther under the bed. Meanwhile, Pearl is dying.
Panic: Mallory joins Felix in the search for the naxolone
Suspense: they find it and Mallory runs back to Pearl
Shock: Mallory trips and the naxolone almost goes into the elevator shaft
Release: Autumn grabs it
Character Death: they are too late to save Pearl
Monster Reveal: there’s some visual demonstration that this causes the Jinx’s field of influence to spread, TBD
[ESTABLISH SOMEHOW THAT THIS CAUSES THE JINX’S POWER TO SPREAD]
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
A melting candle ignites the bed sheet in the room and a fire breaks out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Everyone is comforting Autumn.
Lily smells the smoke, goes to check. It’s cold near the room.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
Shit! Fire!
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Lily runs to the fire cabinet. She grabs the extinguisher and Nico grabs the hose.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
Lily tries to put out the fire, but it’s too much. Nico’s hose won’t work.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Nico runs to another room. Mallory follows.
INT. ANOTHER ROOM
Nico grabs the bed sheet and rushes to the bathroom.
INT. BATHROOM
Nico turns on the bathtub and soaks the sheet.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
Nico slaps at the flames while Lily sprays with the fire extinguisher. Felix enters to help, but Nico tells him to get the fuck out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix retreats back into his room.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
June comes in and tosses water from an ice bucket on the flames.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
June and Candyce exchange buckets. Candyce passes the empty one to Mallory.
INT. BATHROOM
Mallory fills an ice bucket with water.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The buckets are exchanged again.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
The fire is put out. Nico chokes on the fumes and collapses. Lily goes to help her up.
The leg of a burnt dresser snaps. The dresser falls. Lily pushes Nico out of the way before being crushed by the dresser.
HORROR SITUATION: a fire breaks out
Surprise / Shock: a fire starts in Candyce and Nico’s room
Suspense: the characters scramble to put out the fire
Release: the fire is extinguished
Shock / Terror: the dresser falls on Lily and crushes her head
Character Death: Lily
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Candyce and Mallory immediately feel the cold.
[CONTINUE TO ESTABLISH THE BROADENING OF THE FIELD]
They hear June screaming and run to see
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
Mallory rushes to Lily but quickly sees it’s a lost cause.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Mallory is furious and begins kicking the walls.
Autumn becomes hysterical. Candyce tries to comfort her, but Autumn becomes belligerent. Nico steps between them, and the two begin shoving each other. Autumn falls backward into the open elevator shaft. Nico screams “Nooo!”
HORROR SITUATION: an argument breaks out and Autumn is accidentally killed
Anxiety: emotions are running high and the characters begin bickering
Hysteria: Nico and Autumn begin shoving
Shock: Nico accidentally shoves Autumn backward into the elevator shaft
Character Death: Autumn falls to her death
Anguish: Nico is overwhelmed with guilt
Silence. Everyone is in shock. Then Candyce goes into labor.
Nico gets up and goes to Alfred’s room.
INT. ALFRED’S ROOM
Nico retrieves Alfred’s gun.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The others see Nico approaching.
June stops her. There’s a struggle. The gun goes off, shooting Nico in the leg. She falls, another shot going off. It ricochets and nicks the artery in June’s neck.
INT. TBD ROOM
Felix hears the gunshots and Mallory screaming Nico’s name, and runs out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix rounds the corner to see Mallory tending to Nico. Mallory gets the bleeding under control and tells Felix (who’s keeping his distance) she’ll be fine.
Felix tells her to throw him the gun. Nico tries to stop her, but Mallory complies.
Just as Felix picks up the gun, an earthquake strikes.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
Everyone wobbles. Windows shatter. Cracks form on the sides of the building. All along the street, buildings wobble.
INT. LOBBY
The floor splits. Part of the ceiling collapses.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
A piece of the ceiling caves in, blocking Felix from returning to his room. He tells the others to get away from him and keep June safe.
As they are running away, the floor collapses beneath Mallory.
INT. NEXT FLOOR DOWN
Mallory hits the floor below and breaks through it.
INT. TWO FLOORS DOWN
Mallory splats against the floor.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
Felix shares a final glance with June, then retreats into the furthest room he can. Candyce and Nico drag June away.
HORROR SITUATION: Nico attempts to kill Felix and everything goes to shit
Shock / Panic: Candyce goes into labor
Suspense: Nico retrieves Alfred’s gun and heads toward Felix’s room. They others try to stop her.
Shock: both Nico and June are accidentally shot
Panic: hearing the gunshot and his daughter’s name, Felix rushes to help
Terror: an earthquake strikes and the building begins to crumble
Shock: the ceiling collapses behind Felix, preventing him from getting distance between himself and the others.
Character Death: the floor collapses beneath Mallory
Suspense / Hysteria: Felix tells the others to keep June safe before retreating into a room with the gun; he’s going to kill himself
INT. FARTHEST ROOM
The three enter the room, June not wanting to let her father go. Candyce says it’s not cold in the room.
INT. FELIX’S ROOM
Felix prepares to shoot himself and sees his reflection in the mirror. It has its back to him. Suddenly, the head flips backward and gawks at Felix upside down. The reflection turns to face him, the head transformed into the birdlike Jinx.
Felix hears the Jinx’s voice in his head, learning that it wants to cause as much misfortune, suffering and death as possible. Felix has flashes of several historical accidents: the Great Fire of London, the Hindenburg Disaster, the Chernobyl meltdown, the Deepwater Horizon spill.
No more! Felix brings the gun to his head and fires. The gun jams. He smashes the window open, puts his foot on the sill. He slips on the rain water and falls on his back, spraining it, unable to move. The Jinx taunts him the whole while.
HORROR SITUATION: Felix attempts to kill himself
Suspense: Felix prepares to shoot himself
Creepy Moment: his reflection in the mirror is acting independently of him; it transforms into the Jinx
Monster Reveal: the Jinx tells Felix is desire to cause suffering and gives him a glimpse of its prior atrocities
Shock: Felix pulls the trigger on himself, but the gun jams
Anguish: Felix attempts to jump out the window, but falls and is rendered immobile. He’s helpless to do anything to stop the Jinx
INT. FARTHEST ROOM
Candyce is having labor pains.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
The fire truck is finally able to reach the hotel. The ladder is extended to the open window and a firefighter climbs up.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
The firefighter enters the window and calls out.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The firefighter notes the cold, calls out again.
INT. FARTHEST ROOM
They hear him.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
They call back. He tells them to come to him. They dread doing so but have no other choice.
They meet him at hole in the floor. He tosses them a rope, pulling on it as June leaps across the gulf.
Candyce next. She grabs hold of the rope, jumps. She lands at the edge of the hole and the floor gives out beneath her. June and firefighter are nearly dragged down with her.
Nico leaps over the opening and helps them all up.
HORROR SITUATION: the characters need to get over the hole in the floor to get to safety
Fear: the three women have to jump over the pit to get to safety
Suspense: June jumps first
Release: June makes it
Suspense: Candyce next
Shock: Candyce doesn’t make it, and she, June, and the firefighter nearly all go down together
Panic: Nico jumps without a rope
Release: Nico saves them all
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
The firefighter gets on the ladder first.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
It’s raining hard. The firefighter turns to face Candyce, slips, nearly falls.
Candyce is terrified, but Nico kisses her and hands her off to the firefighter. Everyone moves slowly. June and Nico hold the ladder.
The rubble beneath the fire truck shifts. The ladder shakes. The firefighter falls to his death. Candyce loses her grip and dangles over the ground below. Nico climbs out onto the ladder and saves Candyce.
Another firefighter comes to retrieve Candyce, brings her down.
Lightning strikes a transformer. The pole slams against the hotel and the power cable comes a-swinging. Nico dodges it. It comes swinging back. Nico slides down the ladder and leaps off just as the cable electrifies the ladder. Nico’s leg is broken, but she’s otherwise okay.
Using their hose, the firefighters blast the pole far back enough that the cable falls away from the ladder.
HORROR SITUATION: Candyce and Nico try to get down the fire ladder as accidents keep happening
Fear: it’s raining; the fireman slips, nearly falls; Candyce is terrified to climb out
Shock / Terror: the fire truck is jostled; the firefighter falls to his death; Candyce loses her footing and dangles by her hands
Character Death: the firefighter
Suspense: Nico climbs out to save Candyce; another firefighter climbs up to get her
Release: Candyce is brought down to safety
Shock / Terror: Lightning strikes a nearby transformer; a power cable threatens to electrocute the ladder and Nico
Release: Nico slides down onto the truck just before the ladder is electrified
It’s June’s turn. But instead of going down the ladder, she instead goes to rescue her father.
INT. FELIX’S ROOM
Felix has barely gotten to his feet when June enters. He tells her to get away, but she holds him up. The Jinx won’t allow him to die, she reasons, so as long as they’re together, she’s safe.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
June supports Felix as they stumble through the hall. The floor creaks. Debris threatens to fall. But they make it to the room.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
They reach the ladder.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
The power pole slips and falls onto the fire truck, electrifying it. The truck explodes and the ladder falls.
INT. NICO AND CANDYCE’S ROOM
Now what?
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
They take the useless fire hose and drop it down the opening in the floor. Candyce holds onto her father’s back as he climbs down.
INT. NEXT FLOOR DOWN
They reach the floor and hobble toward the odd-number staircase. The ceiling collapses and Felix pulls his daughter away just before she’s crushed.
INT. ODD STAIRWELL
They move slowly down the stairs. Bits of the staircase crumble, threatening to separate the two. The stairwell caves in. They falls down the stairs, stopping with an inch between a rebar and June’s face.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY
The whole thing is collapsing.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
Debris falls from all sides. Everyone backs up.
INT. STAIRWELL
The two get up, climb over the debris. It’s blocking the door. They remove it together. Pull the door open just wide enough for one. Who goes first? They hold hands. Felix will go first and pull June after him. They start.
INT. LOBBY
A pillar collapses, exposing a water main. Water shoves the door closed on June’s arm.
INT. STAIRWELL
Rubble falls all around June.
INT. LOBBY
Felix screams for help.
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
Firefighters come running.
INT. LOBBY
One slips on the wet tiles. The other gets to Felix.
INT. STAIRWELL
The roof of the stairwell caves in.
INT. LOBBY
The firefighter and Felix get the door open and free June just in the nick of time. They flee to the exit, the building collapsing all around them. They leap out the door.
HORROR SITUATION: Felix and June escape from the collapsing hotel
Apprehension: Felix and June move together to the room where the fire ladder is waiting
Shock: the fire truck is destroyed and the ladder comes down
Fear: Felix and June are forced to find another way out
Suspense: they climb down the hole to the next floor down
Shock: June is nearly crushed by the falling ceiling
Suspense: they head down the stairwell together
Terror: the stairwell crumbles, the two are nearly separated, June is nearly killed; the entire building is coming down
Suspense: who goes through the door first?
Anguish: a broken water main spews high pressure water on the door, prevent June from being able to get out
Release: they all escape just as the building comes down
EXT. HOTEL – NIGHT
The hotel comes down. Everyone seems safe. Felix and June hug. Stand. Holding hands, a foot apart.
A police car approaches.
INT. POLICE CAR – MOVING
The wryneck zips past the windshield and startles the driver.
EXT. HOTEL
The police car skids, hits the fallen power pole, flips.
Slow mo: it heads straight for June. Felix spins her out of the way, taking her spot. The car hits him, sending him flying into a standing piece of wall.
June comes to her dying father’s side. They have a final moment before he goes.
The wryneck flies off.
HORROR SITUATION: an out of control police car heads for June
Shock: the wryneck startles the police and their car goes out of control
Dread: the car is headed right for June
Anguish: Felix swings her out of the way at the last second and takes the blow
Character Death: Felix
-
TO SERVE HUMANS Outline
INT. HOMELESS TENT IN A HOMELESS CAMP – DAY/NIGHT
Homeless man raises the new born Andrew. The man dies. Andrew enters an orphanage.
1. INT. ORPHANAGE – DAY
The orphans who compete to be adopted hate Andrew because he’s cute and more adoptable.
Not adjusting well, Andrew has panic attacks. Three mean boys bully him. He’s miserable. Betsy and Clare laugh when Andrew flubs his first writing lesson. That night Clare flashes her bare chest at him. Andrew is embarrassed. Elizabeth thrusts his hand into her pants. He turns red and runs away.
2. EXT. TWO LANE HIGHWAY – NIGHT
A man wearing a cape claims Andrew from the orphanage. Says he’s his son, takes him out in the country, and gives him a high voltage shock. Andrew flaps his arms and flies around the man’s head, has strange hallucinations. The man drops his cape. His skin is scaly like the creature from the Black Lagoon. He attacks Andrew who accidently kills him and returns to the orphanage.
3. INT. ORPHANAGE – NIGHT
The three boys gag Andrew and throw him down a staircase. He takes flight and kicks their butts.
4. EXT. COLD, WINDY, RAINY CITY STREET – NIGHT
M’Lord shows homeless cannibals the orphanage. Millicent wants to adopt.
5. EXT. ABANDONED BUILDING – DAY
Millicent adopts Andrew, takes him inside, ties him up and cooks him to eat. He crashes through a window to escape. She follows but cuts herself and bleeds out. He bakes her in the oven and makes the best meal he’s ever had. When cops surround the building, he goes to the roof and flies away. Detective Mable finds his fingerprints and identifies Millicent’s burned hulk as Andrew’s body.
6. INT. ORPHANAGE – DAY
In disguise, Andrew adopts Betsy from the orphanage and barbecues her in an abandoned house across the state line in Arizona. A SWAT team enters. Andrew disappears from inside a bathroom.
Rooky cop Ethel finds a fishy scale in the toilet. She later becomes a crime scene forensics specialist. Outside the tiny Andrew exits a sewer. As he runs away, he grows back to full size.
7. INT. ORPHANAGE – NIGHT
Andrew coaxes Clare to sneak out with him. He takes her to a random house. Later a housewife returns from shopping and finds Andrew giving Clare a bath in her kitchen sink. Still later, the husband returns from work. In the sink he finds human bones. He runs screaming from the house. Cops arrive. A tiny Andrew climbs from a storm drain outside and returns to adult size.
Midpoint: Homicide detective Mable and forensics specialist Ethel meet at a homicide cop conference, compare crime scenes notes and finds the evidence points to a single killer—Andrew.
During recess, Andrew takes a mean boy, David to a deserted mansion and gives him a bath. He bakes a cake, cuts a slice and serves it to him. After a few bites, David convulses, has a seizure. Andrew cuts him up and roasts him.
8. INT. EMPTY HOUSE – DAY
In another kitchen, Andrew jams Elizabeth’s hands down the garbage disposal and turns it on. A housewife arrives and surprises him in her kitchen. He does the same thing to the housewife’s hands and suffocates them both in black plastic bags.
9. EXT. TWO LANE HIGHWAY BRIDGE – NIGHT
He throws the bags off the bridge. They land in the river and sink to the bottom.
Scene: Hot summer night. High school prom in the gym. Music is loud.
Mable and Stu. Dozens of kids dance. After a dance, Maggie goes to the ladies.
Anxiety: She returns. Gym’s now empty. Spooky. Lights off. Silence is deafening. She walks cautiously. Gym’s reverted to pre-WWII smelly basement it was before.
Surprise/scare: She goes to exit. Door is locked. Outside a foot of snow. Eerie noises. Wind shakes door. Frigid air blows in. She shivers. Gasps, breathes faster.
Release: She rushes back into the restroom. Closes her eyes. Great relief.
Shock: She opens her eyes. The dark room’s now grimy janitor closet it was decades ago.
Fear: The door slams shut behind her. She grabs the handle. It’s locked.
Dread: She feels a draft on her neck. Reluctantly turns around. Window is open. A black, shiny-with-slime creature slithers in. Long tail twitches. Vanishes into blackness. She shrieks. Can’t breathe.
Release: She grabs door handle. This time it opens. Jumps out. Slams door shut. OMG. That was too close. Great relief. Starts to breathe again.
Panic: She realizes somehow she’s still in the room! Again feels a draft on her neck. Slowly turns. The black slimy creature towers over her.
Anguish: She backs up. Creature sniffs her scent. Slips after her. Pins her to the wall. Its tail slips under her dress. Slithers up her bare legs.
ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR
Not adjusting well, Andrew has panic attacks. Three mean boys bully him. He’s miserable.
Scene: A man claims he’s his son, takes him out in the country and gives him a high voltage shock. Andrew is able to fly, has strange hallucinations. His skin is scaly like the creature from the Black Lagoon. The man tries to hit him. Andrew accidently kills him. Returns to the orphanage.
Reaction – The 3 boys push him down some stairs.
Monster Reveal – He flies at them and kicks their butts.
Horror Situation – Led by M’Lord, homeless cannibals case orphanage. Millicent visits the orphanage so she can adopt and eat a boy child.
Suspense: Father Mike shows Millicent the kids. Andrew hides but she adopts him.
Dread: A mind reader, Andrew knows she wants more than simply to adopt him.Shock: She locks him into a toddler’s stroller. He tries to free himself but can’t.
Monster Reveal: She pushes him to an abandoned house. She stares at the front door. The lock magically springs open.
Fear: Inside she puts a cloth with a chemical on it over his mouth. This scares Andrew. He passes out.
Anguish: Andrew wakes up as she padlocks him in a hot oven. She sharpens a carving knife.
Relief: She visits the bathroom. He stares at the padlock. It pops open. He rolls out of the oven.
He crashes through a window to escape. She follows but cuts herself and bleeds out. He bakes her in the oven and makes the best meal he’s ever had. When cops arrive, he jumps from the rood and flies away. Detective Mable finds his fingerprints and identifies Millicent’s burned hulk as Andrew’s.
Horror Situation – In disguise, Andrew adopts Betsy and barbecues her in an abandoned house across the state line in Arizona. When a SWAT team raids the house, he hides in a bathroom.
Suspense:
Monster Reveal – When the cops break in, he’s disappeared.
Rooky cop Ethel finds a fishy scale in the toilet. She later becomes a crime scene forensics specialist. Outside he exits and sewer and gets away.
Character Death 2: Betsy
Why: Betsy laughed when he flubbed his first writing lesson
How: Barbecue
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Horror Situation: Disguised as a elderly woman, Andrew takes his newly adopted Clare into a random house. Later a housewife enters and finds “Millicent” giving Clare a bath in her kitchen sink. Still later, the husband returns from work.
Monster Reveal – In the sink he finds human bones. He runs screaming from the house. Cops arrive. A tiny Andrew climbs from a storm drain outside and returns to adult size.
Character Death 3: Clare
Why: Clare prick teased him
How: Butchers her in the sink
Midpoint: Homicide detective Mable and forensics specialist Ethel meet at a homicide cop conference, compare crime scenes notes and find they point to a single killer—Andrew.
Horror Situation – Andrew plops latest adoptee David in a bathtub in a mansion, cuts the cake he just baked and serves him a slice.
Monster Reveal – After a few bites, David convulses. Has a seizure. Andrew slaughters, roasts him.
Character Death 4: David
Why: David was a meany to Andrew
How: Poisoned cake
Scene: In kitchen, Andrew jams Elizabeth’s hands down garbage disposal and turns it on.
Release: Sobbing, she sees lady of the house walk in. Surprises him in her kitchen.
Fear: He processes her hands the same way and places both women in a plastic bag.
Later, on a bridge he empties the bag. Their remains drop into the river.
Character Death 5: Margaret
Why: Margaret laughed at him
How: Feeds her to a creature
EXT. DESERTED TOTALLY DARK MANSION – NIGHT
Margaret opens, climbs in the kitchen window over the sink. Flips the light switch. No light goes on.
Horror Situation: Margaret enters mansion in search of her blind date.
Anxiety: A bat smashes into her hair, gets entangled. She shrieks. Bat flies out the window.
She searches the kitchen. Cobwebs, spooky noises, clogged toilet smells.
Surprise/scare: A horse whinnies. Lightning flash: A creature on a stallion. Flash again. It’s gone.
The dark creature slithers under the backdoor into the kitchen.
Shock: She has a Boa constrictor in one hand. A human fetus in other. Boa inhales fetus. Vanishes.
She answers her phone. Detective Ethel says they’ll be there ASAP. She sobs her gratitude.
Fear: She hears unhuman sound, races through the mansion and tiptoes up the creaky staircase.
Andrew abruptly appears before her. She gags at the blood and tissue on his mouth. He giggles.
He taps his head switching on a waltz. He takes her in his arms and dances her into the bathroom.
Release: She’s relieved. Smiles delight at seeing him again.
He sits on the side of the tub, pulls her down onto his lap and inhales her fragrances.
Dread: She reacts to a serious cut on the top of his head.
He reaches behind her and retrieves a china tea pot. In the other hand he holds a matching tea cup.
Release: She sips, smiles. It’s just the way she likes her tea. She’s relieved and slowly relaxes.
Panic: He looks up and is face to face with the dark creature.
Anguish: The creature crawls on top of her like a blanket. She shrieks.
Later Andrew removes gristle off a femur. Drops it into the bone pile in the kitchen sink.
He hears noise, sees police SUV pull up. Ethel jumps out, gun drawn, runs toward backdoor.
Andrew lifts a foot off the kitchen floor and flies through the mansion to the stairs.
He zooms to the second floor without touching a step.
Ethel tiptoes in the backdoor. Meets Lucy in the kitchen. They relax. But it’s only for a moment.
Lucy turns on her flashlight. They gasp and are repulsed by the pile of bones in the sink.
From the top of the stairs, Andrew stares down at them and waves bye.
Ethel spots him, screams. She and Lucy pull out their pistols and run to the foot of the stairs.
Andrew laughs, turns to a window that abruptly opens. He flies effortlessly out the window.
Character Death 5: Elizabeth
Why: She’s one of the kids who humiliated Andrew in class
How: Garbage disposal
ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR
FIGHT TO THE DEATH
Horror Situation – Andrew tasers and takes Floyd to a loading dock at a closed factory.
Monster Reveal – He chains him, gets on a forklift and pulls the chair he wrapped around his waist until Floyd’s abdomen pops from his stomach. His spine snaps. His liver protrudes.
Character Death 6: Floyd
Why: Floyd led the mean boys who made Andrew’s life miserable
How: Ripped apart by a forklift
Mable and Ethel enter the front and back doors simultaneously, guns drawn.
In his right hand, Andrew holds a barber’s razor to the throat of Tara, Mable’s little girl.
HYSTERIA – Mable takes careful aim. Ethel yells, NO! He’ll kill Tara.
Mable hesitates. Ethel shoots Andrew in his right shoulder. He drops the razor. Snatches a steak knife with his left hand, prick’s Tara’s neck, dares them to shoot because he’ll kill Tara.
THRILLING ESCAPE FROM DEATH
Ethel aims and fires a bullet into M’Lord’s heart.
DEATH RETURNS TO TAKE ONE OR MORE.
Andrew reappears, throws a knife. It plunges into Ethel’s throat. She slumps to her knees. Bleeds out.
RESOLUTION
Mable and Tara stand before Ethel’s gravestone in Rose Hills Cemetery.
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