Day 16 Assignments

[Dennis Chrisman]

Lesson 16

Subject line: Dennis Chrisman Outline Version 1

Tell us what you learned as you rewrote your script. Using techniques
learned from the programmed text, I found it is easier to plan for and write
action scenes.
Tell us the main improvements you made in your
outline. Adding the techniques gained
from the “Action” class improves the over all script. The methods taught in Lesson 15 gave the
script a better feel of actual action stirring the audiences’ emotions
with suspense, action, and hope.
Tell us what you want the next person focusing on. Action can be
easily written with a little planning; however, suspense and hope make the
audiences emotions go up and down, with them hang onto their seat.

Hell in a Handbasket

Logline: After an economic collapse, a young mother and four children inadvertently perturb a motorcycle gang while on their way to her father’s farm.

Opening: (p, 1 – 10)

The United States (US)is bankrupt and announced the protocol Force Majeure is in place and the US is under Martial Law. Nancy (NANCY) (29) goes to the gun range to shoot her 9-millimeter (mm) Glock.

(Subplot A) She calls her dad (JAMES) (70) who lives on a self-sustaining farm. James invites Nancy and Tom to visit the farm this next week. They agree to go.

(Subplot B) Husband Tom (TOM) (32) tries to get gas and go to work. At the Gas Station a man named Machete (MACHETE) (45) kills the gas station owner. Tom leaves.

Nancy and Nikki, (NIKKI) (9) start out to the James’ farm. They come across a stranger who tells them a renegade gas station called the “Last Stop” has gas.

The stranger also tells them to be very careful at the Last Stop, it’s a dangerous place that buys and sells everything, to include women and children.

Nancy comes across a woman Sara (SARA) (26) in distress at a security checkpoint. Nancy uses as M-45 adaptor to mount on the Glock 9 mm’s receiver, to shoot the guards.

She saves Sara and her son Jamal (JAMAL) (12). She drives across the bridge to the “Last Stop”

(Subplot B) Tom is abducted and forced into the Army. He is sent to the Pacific Front to fight the Chinese.

Inciting Incident (p. 10 – 15)

At EXT. CIMARRON BRIDGE – NIGHT

Nancy and Nikki, along with Sara and her son Jacob, drive across the Cimarron River bridge in a late model SUV. The come to a Gas Station and Store known as the “Black Market”.

EXT. THE BLACK MARKET – PARKING LOT – NIGHT

The building and the parking lot are well lit. Nancy pulls in line to get gas at the station, creeps ahead and stops. In doing so she unknowingly butts in front of a Harley Davidson motorcycle.

The motorcycle’s owner SOUNDS his horn, stops and gets off his bike.

The owner wears a filthy jean jacket with the sleeves cut off. A name tag over the left pocket reads, “Machete”. Machete (45) is tall, masculine with long filthy brown hair. He puts the bike on its kick stand and makes a beeline to Nancy. He gets in Nancy’s face.

MACHETE

What the hell is wrong with you. I was here first.

NANCY

Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t see you waiting. If you’ll

excuse me, I need to pay for the gas.

Machete grabs her by the shoulders…

Nancy shakes him off…

She takes two steps back; executes a spinning round house kick, THUMP, she levels Machete flat on the ground.

Behind Machete his cohorts on their bikes, LAUGH, and YELP at Machete’s demise.

Nancy heads into the Black-Market leaving Machete on the ground unconscious. A couple of his biker buddies help him on his feet. After several minutes—

MACHETE (OUT LOUD, TO HIMSELF)

I’m going make her pay for more than just gas.

Machete walks to the SUV and opens the back door. Nancy’s daughter Nikki sits in the rear of the SUV.

She holds a nine MM pistol in the ready position.

SHOCKED Machete takes several steps back…

He SNEERS and steps forward…

Nikki lowers the pistol; BANG Nikki pulls the trigger.

Machete grabs his foot and yells some more. The bullet severed two of his toes.

Behind Machete his cohorts, on their bikes, LAUGH, and YELP at Machete’s demise.

Nancy comes out of the Black Market; she looks over at Machete, then rushes to the SUV.

She shuts the back door, climbs into the driver’s seat; starts the engine. She turns and looks at Nikki

NANCY

Nikki are you alright?

Nikki hods her head. Nancy pulls away from the gas pump and onto the highway.

The bikers gather around the gas pump. One biker parks his bike and goes into the Black Market. Speaking with the clerk he finds out the Nancy got the last of the gas.

First Turning Point at end of Act 1 (P. 15 – 35)

It’s night; Nancy drives along an empty highway with the kids singing in the back of the SUV. They stop at a lone farmhouse to get water and sleep. An older couple lives there.

They have a boy (Greg) (7) and a girl (Susan) (6) that walked upon their farmhouse. They are orphaned. The older couple gives them to Nancy for care.

The gang is not that far behind them, they stop; light a fire and setup camp for the night.

Machete has his boot off; looks at the gap left by his two missing toes. He wraps a rag around the bloody wound, howling in pain.

He vows to capture that woman and sell her and those kids at the “Last Stop”. The other bikers make fun of Machete.

Mid-Point (P. 25 – 35)

(Subplot A) James drives to a neighbor’s house to pick up fencing. The neighbor is dead. Next, he drives to the local town to find it’s in shambles. He runs across two young teenage boys trying to steal a rat from a young girl. James puts a stop to it, gathers them up, and takes them to his farm.

(Subplot B) Tom is soldering at the Pacific front. He sits in a World War I style trench in a dugout cubby hole. He’s visible tired, filthy, and appears to be malnourished.

(Subplot B) He hears a loud buzzer. He gets up, picks up his weapon and heads over the top, then moves into to Deadman’s Land along with hundreds of other soldiers.

Nancy and has parked the SUV, she and Sara are outside leaning over the hood looking at a map and holding a compass. They hear but don’t see the motorcycles.

Suddenly, Nancy points to the map then shows Sara the compass. They pile into the SUV and start down a steep rock incline. She ends up on the main road and drives forward.

Second Turning Point at end of Act 2 (P. 35-55)

(Subplot B) Tom is SHOT. He falls to the ground unable to get up. He hears the busser signaling retreat. He appears to be stuck in Deadman’s’ Land. A Chinese bugle sounds. Tom’s scared; he hears rumbling near him.

(Subplot B) He pulls his rifle close and removes the bayonet and holds it in his hand. Medics with red cross bands on their arm and on their helmet pick him up, put him on a stretcher; take him back to the US side.

Nancy and the kids turn onto a sandy road and up the mountains to a Ranger Station at the end of the road. They are able to break in the station, eat and find comfort sleeping in bunk beds.

Back on the road Nancy and the kids drive down the mountain. She passes the gang’s makeshift camp. The motorcycle gang follows and catch up to her.

Nancy takes another turn onto a sand covered road. The motorcycle gang can’t ride their bikes in the sand. She loses the gang; becomes lost herself. She eventually ends up on the highway just ahead of the bikers.

The gang is on the blacktop and behind Nancy. Various gang members pull alongside the SUV and strike it with motorcycle chains. Nancy swerves to avoid the damage. At some point she drives off the road and becomes stuck.

The gang grabs Nancy by the hair and drags her out of the SUV. They grab Sara and the kids and pull them out of the SUV. They tie them up with zip cords. Nancy and the kids stand with their hands behind their backs.

Machete walks to Nancy and slaps her in the face. Sara comes to her rescue. Sara has pulled her hands in front of her and climbs on top of Machete; chokes him with the cable tie that secures her hand.

Machete flings her off of him and hits her in the head with the butt of a rifle. Blood trickles from both her ears. Sara is dead.

Nancy is furious. She slips from her cable ties and runs to the SUV. Along the way, she uses KARATE CHOPS, KICKS and THROWS to keep the gang at bay. She makes it to the SUV, puts it into reverse and backs over several bikers and their bikes. She pulls forward, opens the doors and gets the kids into the SUV.

Crisis (P 55 – 85)

Nancy and the kids minus Sara are driving fast to get away from the gang. Various members of the gang ride up to the SUV and try and serve into to it off the road. They drive up and damage the SUV by striking it with motorcycle chains and clubs.

We see steam coming out of the radiator and a bent wheel rim. The motorcycle gang continuous their pursuit and assault on Nancy’s SUV.

They roar up to the vehicle and kick it with their feet, use motorcycle chains to flail the side of the truck, doing everything possible to force Nancy off the road so they can recapture their prey.

Nancy, however, is still not ready to call it quits, especially when they are so close to the farm. As Nancy drives down the road, she sifts her knees to the steering wheel to steer the SUV; grabs her nine MM pistol from the car seat. She quickly holds the pistol in her hand and checks the clip; there are four bullets left.

She calls for Nikki. Nikki comes from the back of the SUV. She’s covered in shards of glass and carefully brushes the broken glass from her clothes; she is unharmed.

Nancy gives her the pistol and tells her to shoot the gas tanks. Nikki leans against the upper edge of the rear seat as it folds up next to the front seats.

She spots a Harley Davidson Electro-Glide, a police vehicle in another life with police accouterment. The rider wears a police crash helmet.

Nikki aims the pistol at the motorcycle through the SUV’s busted out rear window. BANG. She hits the motorcycle gas tank. Precious gasoline begins to spill out of the tank and on to the road.

The leaking gas spills onto the motorcycle’s exhaust pipe and catches in FIRE. The bike and rider immediately swerve off the road, into a ditch; the bike explodes. The rider appears to be unharmed.

Another biker riding a Harley Davidson Cruiser takes the place of Electro-Glide. Nikki takes aim at his motorcycle’s gas tank and FIRES. It explodes immediately and the biker flies off the motorcycle.

Nancy drives her SUV to the top of a hill; on the other side of the hill at the bottom is James’ farm.

Only one lane of the road is open. The other lane is fenced along with the rest of the farm. A security checkpoint is at one end of the gate.

A biker roars up to Nancy’s SUV he has a sawed-off shotgun. He drives the bike, aims the shotgun at Nancy’s tires, and FIRES. The shotgun round rips into Nancy’s right rear tire.

The SUV suddenly swerves to the right. Nancy throws herself onto the steering wheel and struggles to hold the SUV on the road. The SUV begins to fishtail then suddenly drives straight.

Out of nowhere a Molotov cocktail EXPLODES near the biker closest to the SUV. The biker swerves to avoid the explosion and runs off the road. The bike hits the ditch and becomes airborne. The biker flies in the opposite direction.

More Molotov cocktails fly through the air, EXPLODE on the road and into bikes causing pandemonium. Sparks fly from the wheel that had a flat tire; the rubber wore down to the steel rim.

They are very close to the James farm.

On gang member rides to the front of the SUV uses a club and smashes it into the SUV’s radiator. Nancy continues to weave and speeds forward to avoid the motorcycle gang.

The SUV starts to overheat, steam rolls out from under the hood. She continues to weave to avoid the gang.

Climax (P. 85 -100)

(Subplot A merges with the Plot) The farm is in sight. There is a heavy gate to the entrance of the farm. At the far southwestern corner of the farm stands a guard post within the fenced barb wire.

The farm boys use various handmade weapons such a trebuchet to fire upon the motorcycle gang.

The rest of the kids from the farm run to open the gate and provide a defense for Nancy and the kids so they can get into the farm.

James has issued weapons and the crew provides a formidable defense and eventually brings the motorcycle gang to its knees.

Most of the bikes are inoperable. The entire motorcycle gang is wounded in some fashion.

Nancy and the kids drive their battered SUV through the gate and around behind the fam house; they join in defending the farm.

Resolution (P. 100 – 110)

The motorcycle gang surrenders. They stand in a group outside the entrance gate. James tells them to get on what’s left of their bikes and move out except Machete.

With two toes missing and a gunshot wound to the opposant leg, James takes his motorcycle jacket, gives him a gallon of water, and sends him on his way on foot.

(Subplot B merges with the Plot) Tom dresses in civilian clothes. He walks with a limp, uses a cane and carries a backpack. He comes in sight of the farm.

A young lookout sounds a warning cry. James and Nancy come running from the house. As the man limps closer. At some point Nancy recognizes him as Tom. She runs to him, hugs and kisses him.

FADE OUT