Day 16: Sell Your Script in the First 3 Pages

[Elliott Williams]

<div>Subject: Elliott Williams Amazing Opening Scene
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“What I learned doing this assignment is…?” This takes more work than I can give it right now. But I did this exercise earlier when we started rewriting.

</div><div>AFTER</div><div>

TEASER
The SILHOUETTE of a man watches through the glass from an observation room.
THREE SOLDIERS escorted by two doctors and an armed military guard, are led to three tables and strapped in, lethal injection style.
The doctors inject medication into the IV drips.
One Doctor leans over, whispers in the ear of one of the soldiers.
DOCTOR
Thank you for your service.
INTERCOM VOICE (O.S.)
Clear the chamber.
The strapped in soldiers seem clammy, frightened. They breathe heavily. Anticipating.
The Doctors and guards leave.
A countdown begins. 5..4..3..2..
A valve flips and pumps medication into the soldiers. Their bodies go still.
INTERCOM VOICE
Vitals?
DOCTOR
No change.
Abruptly, the three bodies spring to life in a convulsing rhythm – violent and uncontrolled.
INTERCOM VOICE
What is happening?
DOCTOR
I don’t know.
Two of the bodies begin to change to…
WHITE, CRACKED, and PARCHED skin, like a dried river. Flakes of white flesh float off the skin and disappear: burning embers that vanish like fireflies.
The men’s bodies enlarge and distort. Their eyes redden, bulging without distinction between pupil and iris and their gums go slick black. It’s a gruesome sight.
The two men, completely turned to hulking white creatures devoid of humanity, break free of their restraints while the third, who’s yet to change, continues to convulse.
INTERCOM VOICE
The antidote!
The Doctors rush in, it’s too late. The Doctors are savagely mauled.
INTERCOM VOICE
Kill them.
The Guards rush in while the creatures feast and unload their clips. The creatures walk through the bullets, gnash their flesh and break bones.
Suddenly both creatures freeze. Their eyes roll up in their heads as their bodies appear to be in petit mal seizure.
The Silouetted Man from earlier, 30’s handsome, in a lab coat, is also frozen, with his eyes rolled up in the back of his head.
The Creatures, sedate, trudge out of the room as the third soldier remains, still in seizure.

“THE SEEN”

SUPER: FIFTEEN YEARS LATER.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
The ROAR of a vacuum pushing back and forth in a middle class modest living room. ABIGAIL DENCH, 48, a handsome woman, but the years of being the rock of the family have taken their toll.
The vacuum noise isn’t a vacuum. It’s a malfunctioning pump for a CPAP Abigail is trying to fix. CLICK, CLICK, CLICK. The pump sound turns off. In the distance, barely audible, a scratching sound.
ABIGAIL
Brent!
No response. Abigail starts back to work, using her needle nose pliers,…scratch, scratch, thunk.
Abigail, slowly, quietly rises from the table and pulls a handgun hidden behind the sofa.
She listens at the door to the basement. Nothing.
Abigail opens the door, turns on the light and steps inside.
ABIGAIL
Brent!
BASEMENT STAIRWELL
The light only extends the length of the stairwell. The rest is in shadow.
Abigail goes down, with the gun at the ready.
She stops midway, scared as hell, her eyes adjusting.
Gradually, Abigail makes out a silhouette in the darkness, like an animal, it tremors. HOLY SHIT!
ABIGAIL
I see you, you little shit.
The shape shifts and distorts seemingly reconfiguring to something human. Abigail reflexively falls back in disbelief.
The shape lurches toward the stairs.
ABIGAIL
Stop! Stop!
Abigail fumbles with the gun as the shadow is almost on her.
Out of the darkness, a disheveled, dirty, young woman, 20’s, collapses at the base of the steps.
INT. BATHROOM – LATER
The Young Woman, TRACE DENCH, pretty with an edge, in the tub starts awake, gasping for air, up to her neck in ice.
ABIGAIL
There you are.
Trace gasps as she’s trying to catch her breath.
ABIGAIL
This what happens when you wrestle the world.
Trace attempts to escape the freezing tub, but..
ABIGAIL
Hold. Hold. Just a few more seconds. Gotta get that temperature down.
Trace relents. A tinge of blue in her skin as her lip quivers.

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