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Day 2 Assignment
Reply to post your assignment.
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11 Replies
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Amy’s Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned doing this assignment is that there are many ways you can create anticipatory dialogue and that it makes the script a better read.
Andrea
Basic character traits: well-spoken, image conscience, playful, competitive
Want/Need: Wants to become a network anchor, wants Josh and her kids back, needs to feel validated
Paradoxes: Wants to be a good wife and mother but also wants a demanding career
Secret: She once gave a co-worker the wrong directions to a story location so that she could beat her to the story
Flaw: She can be selfish
Special: She was the ugly duckling at school until her braces came off and her acne went away, then she became one of the popular girls.
INT. NEWSROOM – MAKEUP ROOM – NIGHT
Andrea starts to get up from the makeup chair. Joannie runs in with papers in her hand.
JOANNIE
Here’s your script. How’d you get Tom to let you do the live instead of Cynthia?
ANDREA
I just convinced him she needed time to get ready for the regular newscast. Besides, he knows how bad I want the extra exposure.
JOANNIE
You’re missing dinner with your family again.
ANDREA
There will be other dinners.
JOANNIE
No if you become the 6 o’clock anchor. Do you ever think about just staying where you are?
ANDREA
What? And be the noon anchor for the rest of my life? I would die!
JOANNIE
I’m just saying…
ANDREA
What?
JOANNIE
Look, we’ve been friends for years, so I feel like I can say this. You shouldn’t take your family for granted. We’re never guaranteed tomorrow.
ANDREA
What are you talking about? I don’t take them for granted, but my career is my life.
Joannie sighs.
JOANNIE
Yeah. I know.
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I like the idea of anticipatory dialogue for atypical scenes, i.e. not in the woods hunting for a serial killer because that already creates suspense. I have trouble making the reader turn the page in sweet scenes. In this scene, two forty year old friends have a nightcap Hanukkah 2020 by the fireplace but the talk evolves into making a Will, something anyone can identify with, something that will instantly have the audience or reader worry about their future. There is secret conflict between the men because Rodney later dies of COVID that night and Jake lives with his wife and has a child but succumbs to Parkinson’s as he ages. It is a set-up for a pay-off when Rodney’s parents die of COVID, heart attacks, and mutual orgasms on their bed upstairs forcing the men to perform CPR during COVID and get infected. Needless to say, BB sprayed the COVID sanitizer everywhere around the Colonial during the party but he has a habit of disappearing successfully.
INT. COLONIAL – EVENING
JAKE
My beloved deceased wife Priceless had a suicide note but not a Will.
RODNEY
But she didn’t have a real estate.
JAKE
She never had the sculpture made of her in her prime that was good enough to be in the American Wing at the MET. That was her dream. Now that will have to use her photos and films. You must have a Will.RODNEY
Of course. I have a son and a wife. My parents left everything to me to give to them as I choose, and I choose. I even did my Will with a lawyer. You want my lawyer’s name?
JAKE
Can’t pay him. Virtual fitness doesn’t make as much as the real thing. My parents are still living, and I don’t have any significant assets because I tend to spend money as soon as I make it–I live life. I don’t save for the future. But I have a daughter, I mean, not officially, only by genes and blood.
RODNEY
And rape. I remember. But legally Mina belongs to Fadma, and Ibrahim is there as financial back-up. You don’t want to complicate the kid’s life.
JAKE
I love kids. I wanted Priceless to get pregnant. I feel sometimes like Kisele is my kid.
RODNEY
We appreciate your babysitting, but he is mine. You don’t have to leave him anything in your Will.
JAKE
keep thinking I will marry again or make money or maybe adopt a kid, so it is hard to make Will decisions now.
RODNEY
You never know when you are going to go.
JAKE
I feel badly that you have been alone most of your married life and now Litonya is in jail.
RODNEY
That is life. At least I have my health, sort of. My parents were lucky in a way. I spent a lot of time on my Living Will.Talkative Jake is surprisingly silent for a few minutes.
JAKE
I love life.
RODNEY
I love my family and I don’t want to be a burden to anyone. That is what we spent the most time on–the Living Will. If I can’t take care of my family, forget me.
JAKE
Look at my dad. Everyone takes care of him, and he still lectures.
RODNEY
But he is a history professor–his brain doesn’t need a body. My brain is connected to my hands. For years my brain would barely let me talk.
JAKE
Dude–I am so glad you don’t stutter anymore, even in public with girls and all!
RODNEY
So if I have a heart attack, stroke, or get Parkinson’s, Lou Gehrig’s, terminal cancer, or deadly diabetes, sign me out. DNR. Or I will go to Canada, Oregon, Scandinavia or whatever. I don’t want anyone to diaper my dick.
JAKE
Eventually dicks die down anyway and it’s just another useless piece of meat. But some nurses are so cute, they might revive me. If my hands shake too much, I could be happy just listening to music–
RODNEY
You are already getting a bit deaf.
JAKE
Then I will get a hearing aid. I love fitness but if my legs go, I’ll do wheelchair aerobics; if I go blind, I will finally get that massage license. They have all kinds of cancer treatments so I would fight that motherfucker till the end. No matter how tired I am, I never lose my appetite for life. I would get something out of a coma!
RODNEY
Come on, Dude–you are delusional. But if you really believe all this, you better write a special Living Will that keeps you living because by the time the Baby Boomers exhaust Medicare, we may not be able to afford endless medical treatment.
Jake starts doing push-ups and sit-ups.
JAKE
My parents are leaving me money for long-term care, although their colonial mansion goes immediately to the Huguenot Historical Society. They don’t trust me with that house–never did. Remember our first teenage party?
RODNEY
Yeah. I own my parents’ , antique car garage which Litonya would hate, and that dollhouse that needs new babies. I would love to have more kids.
JAKE
Is there a way to get Litonya pregnant so she can have another kid?
RODNEY
Very complicated. I keep trying.
JAKE
Anyway, you convinced me to see your lawyer to make a Living Will that keeps me living as long as possible. Since you want to “die at the right time,” and leave your best to the next generation, you better have more kids. Would you consider divorcing Litonya?
RODNEY
Never. You know how loyal I am.
JAKE
I wish she were as nice a person as you. But she is so connected to the earth that she is almost otherworldly in her superwoman magnificence. Remember when we first saw her naked in the wilderness climbing that waterfall?
RODNEY
Never forget it.
JAKE
Funny that you had Priceless before me. Did you love her as much as L?
RODNEY
I don’t think about all these things. I loved Priceless when I was with her but figured she might be using me. When I saw you two, I realized that you were more compatible than I was. You have always been my best friend, so I had no problem giving her up. A marriage with Priceless would have been difficult.
JAKE
But a marriage to a prisoner was even more difficult.
RODNEY
At least we have Kisele. She is so busy with her research and then–Look, before your optimism makes you forget that you are theoretically terminal, here is my lawyer’s card.
JAKE
Thanks Dude. And give me your Will on my cell phone–just in case I am there and need to follow it.
RODNEY
Except that how can you unplug me or refuse CPR or antibiotics or even food and water for me if you want eternal care? Wouldn’t that be going against your principles?
JAKE
I also value our everlasting friendship. All friendship is based on accepting differences. What is good for you may not be good for me and vice versa. I am there for you, buddy.
RODNEY
Should we give up alcohol completely?
JAKE
One cold beer is okay on a hot day or a hot toddy to chase the cold away. Yeah, I want to live forever. But pain could be a problem. I would have to become a drug addict if pain got too much. What’s that noise?
RODNEY
Parents having sex on their waterbed.
JAKE
Can’t believe they are doing it in their seventies in the middle of a pandemic and I must satisfy myself at 40. Gotta hand it to them, bro, keepin the flame alive for more than forty years.
RODNEY
Better than me and Litonya.
JAKE
Give yourself a break. She’s only been out of prison six months and she must spend so much time at Lamont finishing her PhD.
RODNEY
True, but I wish I could satisfy her more..His parents’ moans are getting orgasmic.
JAKE
Do they know we can hear them?
RODNEY
I think they think everyone left. We all keep curfews because of COVID.
Suddenly Jen screams, “Help! Help!”
They run upstairs but when they open their bedroom door, she has stopped. They are silenced, wrapped in each other’s arms, naked. Jake uses his CPR skills to look, listen, and feel for a pulse. Nada. Rodney covers his parents’ private parts and begins compressions, sloshing around on the waterbed.JAKE
You gotta put them on a hard surface..Rodney is sweating, looking like he is about to pass out.
RODNEY
Careful. It takes all our strength to move his obese mom whom Jake immediately starts compressing. When they rotate, they bring down his dad and Rodney continues pounding on his mom. Hard and fast. But not hard and fast enough because it is his mom.
JAKE
We need an AED. Calling Joe to see if he can come over. He has fresh ones in his trucks. There aren’t any restaurants open now around here.
RODNEY
Shit. You called 911?
JAKE
Yeah, but this is the country. We should get them into a car and take them there ourselves, but we need Joe and the AED. Joe doesn’t answer. Maybe he is doing something for the FDNY.
They do mouth to mouth without worrying about protective barriers because these are their parents, well, they are like second parents to Jake. After about ten minutes of exhausting work, SIRENS. EMS arrive in space suits, COVID careful, and immediately try to shock them with AED. The four of them succeed in bringing this loving couple, weighing about 500 pounds between them downstairs.
RODNEY
Where are we going?The medics reply
Kingston is closest. There could be traffic on the bridge to Poughkeepsie. -
PS 80 Michelle Damis Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned doing this assignment is that I can enter into Final Draft and cut and paste, I was having a really hard time feeling like I wasn’t being efficient by having to type it in, then knowing later I would have to re-type into Final Draft. This is actually a big relief and motivating as it feels like progress has officially begun.
EXT. SMALL LAKE/PARK AREA – DAY
Marin is on a paddleboard with her younger sister RACHAEL (mid 40’s, athletic, it is obvious they are sisters). Marin is really going for it, Rachael is having a hard time keeping up.
RACHAEL
God Marin! Slow down….what has gotten into you?
MARIN
I’m just having a good day!
Marin yells back, wind blowing her hair, smile plastered.
RACHAEL
Can your good day be just a little less “aggro”?… Please!
MARIN
OK…slow-poke.
Marin teases her sister but slows down to wait for her. Rachael catches up quickly.
RACHAEL
Geez…Did You have had some awesome empty-nester, morning sex or what?
They now paddle side by side. Marin gives her a big sister smirk.
MARIN
Well, that would require my nest to actually be empty.
RACHAEL
What? Did Nina come home? When?
MARIN
Yep. 3 weeks ago.
RACHAEL
How come you didn’t tell me? What happened?
MARIN
I didn’t want you to worry. She couldn’t find a job after graduation, and you know Jim, he is a big softy. So she is home and I’m back to being a ghost. But, not for long…
Marin now has a slightly mischievous look on her face.
RACHAEL
Ooohh…Did she find a job?
MARIN
Nope…we’re going to take in a renter
Rachael looks confused.
MARIN
And that will pay HER rent in town!
RACHAEL
So you would rather have a perfect stranger in your house than your own daughter?
MARIN
Don’t judge Rachael. Yours are still little. Just wait, one day you’ll wake up and they’ll hate you for no apparent reason.
RACHAEL
But will they kill you?… I mean, you could totally end up with a serial killer or something…
MARIN
At least I know how to deal with a serial killer. They don’t teach you damn thing about daughters in law school.
RACHAEL
Well, you are much braver than I.
MARIN
It’s not so much bravery as it is desperation.
Rachael pulls ahead slightly.
RACHAEL
Race you to the dock!!
They both start paddling hard.
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Budinscak Anticipation Dialog
Day 2
What I learned doing this assignment:
o Techniques to draw the reader to our character, make them worry/wonder about them.
o Curiosity caught the reader, and the cat’s pissed.
Character Names:
Jack – slick/street smart, selfish, condescending, generous
Subtext – Conniving
Logline – Jack isn’t a role model, nor does he want to be, but … when presented with a captive audience – his nephews, Puck & Sal – he will present whatever version of his facts as he sees fit.
Don Vito – Dictatorial, aloof/arrogant, narcissist, sneaky
Subtext – Underhanded
Logline – Don Vito rules with an iron fist and relishes his reputation. He is rarely fooled and plays a nasty game of poker, especially when he holds all the cards.
Setup:
It’s the beginning of the story and Jack has witnessed the moving body bag being removed from the hearse. Don Vito grills Jack about what he saw and Jack convincingly admits to seeing nothing or knowing anything.
INT. FUNERAL HOME OFFICE – NIGHT
Seated in a plush chair, Don Vito leans forward and places his elbows on the desk, his hands together, but not for prayer. On the opposite side of the desk, Jack leans back in his shitty metal folding chair. He’s ready for battle.
DON VITO
Jack, do you know why they call me the Weatherman?
JACK
With two brothers as morticians, your family wanted a meteorologist?
DON VITO
Jack, you’re a funny man. No, make that clever. Clever is better. They call me the Weatherman cuz I have an uncanny knack for calling when and where lightning will strike.
JACK
And when is the lightning strike coming?
DON VITO
Hard to tell right now. It’s kinda cloudy.
JACK
How may I help?
DON VITO
I need you to do a personal favor for me. Will you?
JACK
Always, Don Vito.
DON VITO
Bless you, Jack. All I need is for you to make a delivery for me. That’s it.
JACK
What’s the catch?
Don Vito motions towards Carmine’s, the restaurant across the parking lot.
DON VITO
You’ve got until Monday at 2:00. At 2:01, I guarantee lightning will strike Carmine’s and burn it to the fucking ground.
Jack sits in silence. Now it’s the Don’s turn to lean back and relax.
DON VITO
Jack, it’s what you don’t say that speaks the loudest.
JACK
Why me?
DON VITO
Cuz we’re business partners. We’re attached, like the letters M and N. You know what I mean?
The wheels are turning in Jack’s head as he shakes it no.
DON VITO
You can add N to one word and get the exact opposite meaning than with a M. Watch. Skim means to get fat while skin means to take away. Let’s use it in a sentence. If you continue to skim from me, I will skin you alive.
JACK
Don Vito, I’ve always answered the call for you. Whenever, wherever for whatever, I’ve been there. Have been, will be. Always.
DON VITO
Jack, I know you’re taking a little extra for yourself.
JACK
I’m sorry, Don Vito, I don’t know what you’re talking about.
DON VITO
Are you saying the elves who make shoes snuck in and stole it?
JACK
I know I didn’t do it. I can’t vouch for the elves
Don Vito leans forward, Jack leans forward.
DON VITO
We’re fast approaching the point of no return. Once we’re there, I am no longer your friend, I become the guy you must avoid. Capisce?
JACK
I understand. With my integrity in question, I will prove myself to you once again. I accept and will handle your favor.
DON VITO
Always good to come to an understanding with you. I’ll see you ….
JACK
(cutting in) … tomorrow morning. Good night.
Jack rises from his chair.
DON VITO
Tick tock, Jack, tick tock. The clock’s started.
As soon as the door shuts after Jack leaves, Don Vito picks up the phone and punches in a number.
DON VITO
We have one more guest for the party. That makes four. (laughs) Well, three and a half anyway.
Don Vito chuckles at his own macabre wit as he leans back in his chair.
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Rob Bertrand’s Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned: I learned the eleven types of anticipatory dialogue and how they help keep readers turning pages.
Annie Andrews – Protagonist
Basic character traits: Sarcastic, quick tempered, fragile teenager who aches for acceptance.
Character Logline: Annie is a high school student, overwhelmed with guilt over the death of her mother, who’s struggling to come out to her traditional father.Jessica Andrews – Side Character
Basic character traits: Shy, Nervous, Crafty, and inherited her sister’s gift of sarcasm.
Character Logline: An eight-year-old girl becomes obsessed with horror movies after the death of her mother and soon starts to believe there’s a monster living in her closet.Jocelyn Wilcox – Side Character
Basic character traits: Free Spirited, Rebellious, Seductive
Character Logline: A free spirited rebel, who lives in fear of her overprotective parents.Danny Laplante – Antagonist
Basic character traits: Traumatized, delusional, Liar, who’s dangerous.
Character Logline: Danny is a high school drop out with a history of mental illness, who becomes obsessed with tormenting Annie after she rejects his affections.INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY
The afternoon rush has the baristas working double time, as a group of rowdy high school kids pile through the door. This is the place to be after school.
In the back corner booth, Annie sits with Jocelyn and Jessica. They each drink a giant blended energy drink of various colors, topped with a mountain of whipped cream. Jocelyn’s drink is so large it obscures her face.
JOCELYN
No way!Jessica pushes the drink away, revealing her face.
JESSICA
I hear it every night, in my closet. I swear.ANNIE
Jess, we talked about this.JESSICA
I heard footsteps!JOCELYN
This is so fucking cool! I’m snapping Armando!Jocelyn fingers move fast as lightning over her phone.
ANNIE
It’s just a creaky old house.Jocelyn receives a message and smiles.
JOCELYN
It’s on! Tonight! We’re having a Séance!Jessica’s eyes go wide.
JESSICA
Like The Changeling?JOCELYN
The…what?From across the coffee shop, the bell above the door rings. Annie recognizes him instantly. It’s Danny Laplante. She sits down low in the booth.
Danny takes a place at the end of the order line.
ANNIE
Oh shit! It’s him!Jocelyn and Jessica both lean over at the same time to look.
JOCELYN
Who?ANNIE
The dude I ditched at the fair.JOCELYN
Oh yeah! What’s his face…JESSICA
Danny.JOCELYN
(shouts)
Hey Danny!Jocelyn ducks low in the booth, laughing.
Danny looks over, sees Annie.
ANNIE
What are you doing! Oh, shit! He saw me. He’s coming over…Danny appears at Annie’s table. He looks unwell, dark circles under his eyes, like he hasn’t slept.
DANNY
Hi, Annie. You’re alive…ANNIE
Uh….yeah…about that.DANNY
It’s my fault. I…I know I freaked you out. I just wanted to apologize.ANNIE
Thanks.Jocelyn clears her throat.
ANNIE (CONTINUED)
Oh…this is my friend Jocelyn and this is my little sister, Jessica.Danny doesn’t see them. He looks only at Annie.
JOCELYN
S’up?JESSICA
We’re having a séance.Danny finally breaks eye contact with Annie.
DANNY
A séance? Sounds spooky…JESSICA
Our house is haunted…ANNIE
Jessica!DANNY
Hauntings can be dangerous. Maybe I could come over and–ANNIE
–No! Uh…I mean…my dad won’t allow boys over when he’s not home.DANNY
Well…what he doesn’t know, won’t kill him, right?Annie looks to Jocelyn for help.
JOCELYN
Sorry bro, girls only. Like, catch a hint.Danny glares at Jocelyn
DANNY
You think it’s your mom? Haunting you?It’s the first time Jessica has thought of this. Her face becomes concerned.
ANNIE
We should go…The girls squeeze out of the booth and head towards the door.
DANNY
(loud)
Maybe she just wants you to apologize?!JOCELYN
Take a shower, bro!
Annie doesn’t look back. The door crashes as she escapes out the door.
CUT TO:
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Jodi’s Anticipatory Dialogue – Day 2
By using anticipation dialogue it helps build a road map. Mine was an emotional road map of Elizabeth’s pain. By using the eleven techniques it helped build on each character. The possible consequences, the warnings, the timelines, the predictions; whether the character believes them or not, the reputations and challenges. It made for a much fuller bodied scene.
Pam Karras
Traits: Logical, Aggressive when mad, Compassionate, TenaciousSubtext: Life must be fair for all
Pam sees the pain and suffering of people living in her state, which has grown exponentially with the SB8 law which has put more women and children into poverty and changed lives for the worse. She decides to run for the Governorship to try to reverse this law.Elizabeth Bailey
Traits: Loving, Assertive, Vengeful
Subtext: Sorrow filled
Elizabeth’s Daughter Karen was killed. She does everything she can to numb the pain, she can’t let go and creates a group set out on revenge.
Charles Wright
Traits: Grounded, Ethical, Loyal
Subtext: Committed
Charles knows Elizabeth must handle her Daughter’s death in whatever way will help her. He is by her side through the thick and thin of it, even though he feels Elizabeth is handling Karen’s death very unethically.
INT. ELIZABETH’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Pam is sitting in Elizabeth’s living room with Elizabeth and Charles.<div>
PAM: We’ll
get em’. Whoever is involved, we’ll get
them.</div><div>
ELIZABETH: That’s
what you said last time you were here. And
why is it whenever I go to your department I’m shooed off like a blood sucking mosquito.PAM: Who
shooed you off? Did you ask for me?ELIZABETH: Whoever
mans the desk there, and I always ask for you.CHARLES: Yeah,
she’s tried to tell you guys anything we hear.Pam reaches into her pocket and pulls out a business
card.PAM: I’m so sorry
that’s happened to you Elizabeth, I can’t imagine why that would have happened.ELIZABETH: It
happened a couple of times.PAM: Here’s
another card, tack in on your door if you have to, keep it accessible. Just ask for me, and I’ll get your call.Elizabeth looks at the card and tosses it on the
coffee table as if it’s useless.PAM: Hang in
there you two, it’s been a while now and we’re still getting anonymous leads
about Karen’s accident.ELIZABETH: (in
tears) Accident. It was no accident.Charles rubs Elizabeth’s back as Pam takes her hands.
PAM: Hang
tight Elizabeth. We’ll have him in
custody with four weeks. I know it’s
not fast enough for you two, but we have to dot our i’s and cross our t’s so
the case doesn’t get thrown out with a loophole.ELIZABETH: I’ll
have better luck going after the bastards myself.PAM: You do
and that’s a sure way to let em’ walk free and you end up in jail. We don’t want Karen’s case endangered. Give us time. Please give us time.Charles is still rubbing Elizabeth’s back.
CHARLES: It’s
okay Mama Bear. (To Pam) She’s a Grizzly
when it comes to her cub.ELIZABETH: (through
tears) You have four weeks. If you don’t
have Karen’s killer by then, I’m gonna get em’ myself.Pam stands.
PAM: (sternly) I hope for your sake that you’re blowing off
steam right now. I know you want more, immediately,
but the system works slowly and solidly.
Trust me (beat) please. I’ll
check back in with you soon.She looks at Charles, he nods in agreement as he
holds Elizabeth.Pam leaves as Elizabeth sighs heavily into Charles
chest then she walks over to the mini bar and grabs a full bottle of Vodka. She holds it close to her chest while unscrewing
the lid. She starts chugging it as fast
as she can.</div>
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DAY 2 BOB SMITH’S ANTICIPATORY DIALOGUE
What I learned is…?
Look for every opportunity to add anticipation of what is to come.
This is a sequence of five scenes.
Character traits, subtext and Character Loglines of the characters involved:
EMIL JANNINGS: His traits are that he is Jealous, imperious, fearful (about his possible
loss of star-status and for his future career). Subtext: Deceitful and manipulative.
Logline: Emil Jannings is the Oscar-winning star of “The Blue Angel” but is jealous of Marlene Dietrich whom he fears will undermine his star-status.
MARLENE DIETRICH: Her Traits: Ambitious, creative, subservient (to director, von Sternberg). Subtext: Domineering (publicly); subservient to von Sternberg; contemptuous of Jannings.
Logline: Dietrich is the unknown discovered by director, von Sternberg and cast in the prominent role of showgirl Lola Lola whom he grooms for her role and for future stardom, although she is in a feud with the film’s star (Emil Jannings).
JOSEF von STERNBERG: Traits: Perfectionist, artistic, exacting.
Subtext: Demanding.
Logline: Josef von Sternberg is the celebrated director of “The Blue Angel” who cast his discovery Marlene Dietrich as Lola Lola in defiance of the studio brass and the star (Emil Jannings) and now find himself in a relationship of both lover and mentor of Dietrich while trying to direct “The Blue Angel” and play referee in a feud between Jannings and Dietrich.T
KURT GERRON: He plays the Magician in “The Blue Angel.” Traits: Affable, amiable; Subtext: Conciliatory.
Logline: If Santa Claus were clean shaven, younger and Jewish, he would be Kurt Gerron; a real show business trouper who spreads joy.
HANS ALBERS: He plays Mazepa the strongman in “The Blue Angel” Traits: Intelligent, cautious. Subtext: conceals rather than speaks.
LOGLINE: A dashing young actor with a future who is building it by acting in “The Blue Angels.”
HEINRICH MANN: He is the author of “Professor Unrat” which is the novel on which “The Blue Angel” is based. Traits: Bookish and peevish. Jealous of living in his brother’s (Thomas Mann) shadow. Angry at von Sternberg for not casting his mistress in the role of Lola Lola and giving it instead to Marlene Dietrich. Subtext: Angry and trouble making.
LOGLINE: The angry author who tries to sabotage “The Blue Angel” because he fears it has mangled his novel on which the film is based.
INT. THE STUDIO SCREENING ROOM – DAY
The room is dark except for a shaft of light onto the screen on which the dailies are being projected. Watching the dailies and sitting in the dark, are HEINRICH MANN, author of “Professor Unrat” the novel on which “The Blue Angel” is based and Emil Jannings, the star of “The Blue Angel” who is smoking a cigarette.
We see on screen, the image of Dietrich (as Lola Lola) remove a hoop dress exposing her legs, in addition to her top piece of the costume, she wears only panties. We see Jannings (as the Professor) admiring her but embarrassed
Janning seated next to Dietrich at the cluttered table, drops a cigarette box, he bends down onto the floor and begins picking up cigarettes, getting a good look at Dietrich’s legs.
Next we see Dietrich climb the spiral staircase to her apartment. As she reaches the top step, at which point we only see her legs on the staircase, she slips off her panties and drops them on to the shoulder of the unsuspecting professor (Jannings).
Next we see Dietrich (as Lola Lola), now wearing what looks like a black bottom of a two piece bathing suit and a dark blouse, climbing up on boxes to reach a top box for a costume.
Next, Dietrich is in costume for the next act. She seductively says to Jannings, “How do you like me now?”
The dailies end. The lights fade in full. Jannings, still smoking turns to Mann.
JANNINGS
You like it?
MANN
I liked Miss Dietrich’s legs. But that’s
The problem. Miss Dietrich’s legs
dominate every scene. May I have a
cigarette?
Jannings puls out his gold cigarette box and opens it. Mann takes a cigarette. Jannings lights it for him. Mann puffs on it nervously.
JANNINGS
What do you mean Miss Dietrich’s legs dominate
Every scene?
MANN
Can’t you see it? Mr. von Sternberg is mangling my novel into a pornographic film – and you can tell him that for me.
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY
STERNBERG
(cojoling)
Emil, every author complains about how the
director turns his precious words into something
different, but “pornography”? It’s absurd!
JANNINGS
It’s what he thinks. The distributors and audiences may think so
too. I thought you should know.
STERNBERG
Emil, to portray Lola Lola as seductive is not pornography.
In order to show how your character and the school boys
are smitten by her, I have to portray her as seductive. There is
something else about Heinrich Mann, when his girl friend
auditioned for the part of Lola Lola, I rejected her and cast
Marlene in the role.
JANNINGS
I was not aware. I always benefit from our discussions. But.
You never seem to be available to me or other members of the cast.
Only Marlene.
STERNBERG
Of course. You are the seasoned actor and the star. She is the novice who needs special support and direction. It would be
helpful if you, as the star, lent your support to her, as well.
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY.
It is another day during a break on the set.
Jannings, Gerron, and Albers are present.
JANNINGS
Sergei Eisenstein! Buster Keaton! We have had
every great director visit the set of “The Blue
Angel,” except the director of “The Blue Angel.”
Except when he has a scene to shoot.
GERRON
I wouldn’t be concerned about this, Emil.
I just follow his direction and act until he likes
it and he says, “Cut. Print.” By the way, I have
news that will interest –
ALBERS
(onterrupting)
In the end, we all must support each other. And.
Actors must support the director.
GERRON
And you have been very supportive, Hans.
JANNINGS
Yes. Even though your scenes are not scheduled
to be shot as yet, you are on the set every day to
support us. You have been a true friend.
ALBERS
Then, as I friend, I must tell you, Emil, your
complaints about the director and his
relationship, whatever it is, with Marlene
are noticed by many. Your feeling snubbed
as the star and walking off the set – twice –
is doing no good for the production, or yourself.
GERRON
Gentlemen, I do have something important to share.
JANNINGS
What can be more important than the directorial
malpractice on the set of a major motion picture?
GERRON
The question about how to survive the Nazis.
Remember our talk a the Club Silhouette after
Hirschfeld’s prophesy of Nazi rule. The Question:Is it morally permissible to cooperate with an enemy
in order to save your own life and the lives of others. I finally went to Temple and asked Rabbi Prinz.
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. A SPLENDID REFORMED TEMPLE IN BERLIN – NIGHT
It is the traditional Sabbath Eve Kabalat Shabbat service of Friday evening. The service is concluding with a robust singling of the Yigdal hymn. Everyone in the congregation is standing, even those whose seats are on the Bema on either side of the Ark. Those seated at the Bema include RABBI JOACHIM PRINZ, 30, a charismatic Rabbi, THE CANTOR to the right of the Ark, and on the left, the SYNAGOGUE PRESIDENT, and another LAY OFFICER.
Standing in the congregation, Gerron himself is robust in lending his professional voice to the singing of the Yigdal.
As the hymn comes to an end, Rabbi Prinz, crosses to the center of the Bema, top step, and pronounces the final blessing with uplifted hands over the congregation.
PRINZ
“The Lord Bless you and keep you.
The Lord make his face to shine upon
you and be gracious unto you. The Lord
Lift up the light of his countenance upon
you and give you peace”
CONGREGATION
Omayn.
PRINZ
Shabbat Shalom.
CONGREGATION
Shabbat Shalom.
Prinz steps down from the Bema and shakes hands with a few congregants, one of which is a child whom he bends low to the child’s level to address.
Gerron crosses to Prinz.
PRINZ
Ah, Kurt. I am so glad to see you. You had
told me you had a question.
GERRON
Yes. I do.
PRINZ
Well, join me near the Holy Ark and the Eternal Light anf
Prinz leads Gerron up onto the Bema. Prinz sits at his his seat and prayer desk. Gerron takes the Cantor’s seat.
GERRON
Rabbi, like everyone, I am concerned about the rise of
Nazism. I fear they will rule Germany. My question, is it
permissible to cooperate with the Nazis as a way to protect
one’s own life and that of my loved ones.
PRINZ
If it cannot be avoided, as long as no lives are taken,
it is permissible. In Spain, Portugal, and the New
World, there are Secret Jews who outwardly were
Christian to save themselves from the Inquisition.
DISSOLVE TO:
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY (as before)
JANNINGS
May we never have to face it, but it is good to know
That your eminent Rabbi’s opinion is that it is
permissible to collaborate with the Nazis in order to
survive. Let’s hope we are not faced with such a choice.
GERRON
Yes. But. I fear Hirschfeld’s premonition about the Nazis will come to pass.
-
Armand Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned…
“Anticipatory dialogue uses statements or questions that create expectation in the reader’s mind. It causes the reader to wonder/worry about some future event in the script.”
1. Direct prediction.
2. Indirect prediction.
3. Countdown.
4. Imply consequences.
5. Imply hopelessness.
6. Shield from consequences in advance.
7. Warnings.
8. Create reputation for the villain.
9. Confront someone hiding from a future consequence.
10. A challenge issued.
11. Silence at a strange time.
Name: TYLER, THE GHOST
Traits: Arrogant, Sarcastic, Immature, Romantic
Subtext: Scared, in Denial
Character Logline: Tyler is the ghost of an entitled college jerk who was murdered 20 years ago by a masked serial killer, and now has to overcome his hidden guilt and fears to save a new group of college kids from suffering the same grisly faith as him.
Name: MADDIE, THE FINAL GIRL 20 YEARS LATER
Traits: Brave, Tough, Stubborn
Subtext: Paranoid
Character Logline: Maddie is the sole survivor of the original massacre who is obsessed with the return of the masked killer who was never caught and sets out to stop the killer at any cost now that the killer’s back.
Name: CHARLES, THE MASKED KILLER WHO WAS NEVER CAUGHT
Traits: Nerdy, Rational, Sadistic
Subtext: Concealing, Nice Exterior
Character Logline: Charles is Tyler’s nice and nerdy half-brother (only seen briefly in the opening scene) who wants to fulfill his secret urge to murder people and getting away with it, but now has to face off with the ghost of his brother and the final girl (Tyler’s girlfriend) he’s always loved.
LEX, THE GOTH HIGH SCHOOL GIRL
Traits: Prickly, Sarcastic, Intelligent, Resourceful
Subtext: Insecure, Lonely
Character Logline: Lex is a brilliant high-school goth obsessed with true crime and grisly murder mysteries who (secretly) came to the manor with her college-aged sister (and her party friends) to attempt communicating with Tyler’s ghost.
SCENE:
INT. LEX’S BEDROOM – MANOR – NIGHT
Tyler speaks to Lex using her EVP (electronic voice phenomena) app.
TYLER
Listen to me. If you and your friends don’t leave right now. You’re all going to die.
LEX
They’re my sister’s friends. And we’ll never get them out of here, they’ve been drinking for hours.
TYLER
All I need is 5 minutes inside of you.
LEX
I would slap you if I could.
TYLER
You know what, forget it. The killer is already inside hiding somewhere, everyone is already dead… Just like the last time.
LEX
If we lure them outside, we can get them in the car.
TYLER
We need to do it fast, I know the killer will show up right away.
LEX
If he shows up, I’ll kill him.
TYLER
“If he shows up, I’ll kill him.” Are you stupid? The killer will not stop until you, your sister and everyone else is mutilated, decapitated, impaled in clever yet gruesome ways, chopped into tiny pieces—
LEX
Alright, I get! Running away it is.
-
Pablo’s Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned: I suppose I lean on dialogue too much to tell the story. But this really does help push the story forward in that readers/viewers will want to know the answer to the question you are suggesting in the scene. The example I wrote quickly will likely not be what I go with but I was easily able to convey potential consequence with a bit of warning and secrecy. It also forms more a of conflict between two characters.
INT. PRODUCTION STUDIO – DAY
Pete is tapping, swiping and scrolling a tablet. His brow scrunched and he’s chewing on his lip. He side-eyes Frank. He taps his foot a few times and then heads towards him.
PETE: Frank. I sent out a dozen.
FRANK: Yeah?
PETE: The hub shows that eighteen in use.
FRANK: Are they not on the GPS?
PETE: No. They’re trackers are off.
FRANK: Under repair?
PETE: I checked myself.
FRANK: We lost two last month.
PETE: Those are accounted for.
Beat.
FRANK: I’d bet Sal and Bobby broke them down for spare parts and forgot to take them off the list.
PETE: I don’t think so.
FRANK: Well, what do you think then?
Beat.
PETE: Six would have been drop-off. Which is something we don’t do anymore.
Beat.
PETE: Right?
FRANK: Right.
Frank takes a drag of his vape pen.
PETE: Frank. If it turns out you are still working with Sapo-
FRANK: Oh come on, Pete.
PETE: If you are. Then I walk away right now, man.
FRANK: Stop it.
PETE: I’m serious. This thing we got going with the BP, it’s weird but… I’m not trying to get locked up.
FRANK: The BP ain’t shit.
PETE: They already have a couple of our buzzards. They’ve got the haul from that last drop off. They really do have us by the balls here, man.
FRANK: The BP is easily the weakest branch of authority there is, Pete. The whole reason they are making us do this is because they need us. They get no help from up top. So they have to make these “deals” to get by.
Beat.
PETE: Are you still making runs?
FRANK: No.
Beat.
Pete gives Frank an unconvincing nod. He turns and tosses the tablet on his desk. He sits and makes himself busy on his desktop. Frank watches him for an extra second and goes back to piloting.
-
Janeen’s Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned is that any dialogue in any scene can include anticipatory dialogue. It just needs to be added to what is already there.
Characters:
Morgan Day <div>
Basic Character Traits:
Insecure; Curious/Eager to learn; Perfectionist — can’t leave well enough alone; Bold under pressure
Subtext Character Traits: Intimidated, Crafty
Logline: Morgan is a wealthy fashionista who wants to help other women to prove to herself that she is not just a trophy wife.
Possible areas of subtext: Pretends to believe she is inferior to her husband. Collects friends who help intimidated women while not realizing she is intimidated. Pretends altruism while her work is a form of revenge against her husband.
<div>
SCENE
INT. MORGAN’S CAR – CONTINUOUS
Morgan calls 9-1-1 and boldly states that a woman asked her to call for help at the designer’s address. Two males cops arrive and Morgan follows them to the designer’s house.
MORGAN drives down the street until she’s out of sight of the Richards house. Then she pulls over, takes a deep breath, gets out her phone and prepares to make a call.
She punches 9-1-1 and waits, considering.
She hits call, takes a deep breath and waits.
9-1-1 OPERATOR
Nine one one. What is your emergency?
Morgan steels herself.
MORGAN
I was just at 427 Hampton Square Road. As I was leaving, a woman in the living room with two children gave me the sign for help, so I’m calling.
9-1-1 OPERATOR
Sign for help?
MORGAN
You know, from TikTok — hand up, thumb across the palm, then fold down the fingers.
9-1-1 OPERATOR
Okay, ma’am. Do you have reason to believe she’s in immediate danger?
MORGAN
I saw her in a women’s shelter with bruises recently. She looked scared tonight, huddled in the dark with her toddlers.
9-1-1 OPERATOR
So you were in the house?
MORGAN
Yes, her husband is –
Morgan hesitates.
MORGAN
Someone I know. I was there on business.
9-1-1 OPERATOR
Do you have reason to believe this woman is in immediate danger?
Morgan’s frustration reaches it’s limit.
MORGAN
She asked me to send help so I have reason to believe she thinks she’s in danger. Are you sending someone or do I have to go back in there myself?
9-1-1 OPERATOR
Someone’s on their way. I’m just trying to understand the emergency.
MORGAN
He may well kill her this time. Send someone.
Morgan hangs up and waits.
INT. MORGAN’S CAR – LATER
A squad car goes by Morgan’s car with lights on, but no siren. It pulls into the Richards’ driveway. Morgan follows, stopping just outside the gates.
Two male cops get out of the car and MORGAN throws her head back against the headrest in despair.
MORGAN
Damn it. Don’t fall for his bullshit.
Fingers tensed on the steering wheel, Morgan watches as the police disappear into the house.
</div></div>
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Emmanuel’s Anticipatory Dialogue
What I learned doing this assignment is dialogue should not always be on the nose or matter of fact. Allow the reader to wonder and discern what the character might say or surprise the reader with dialogue that is not expected.
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