Day 2: What I learned

[Julie Scorziell]

I learned that this scene felt almost exactly the opposite of the opening scene in The Dark Night. There, a fight between evil v. good started right away with lives in the balance. Here, a boy’s life is in the balance as well, but it’s unclear that the fight lies between evil v. good. Instead, the characters and story is much more nuanced and will take time to unravel. Important to note again, though, in both, someone’s life is at stake.

Someone once told me something or someone always has to die in a story, whether it’s literally, or a symbolic or figurative death. In my story, there is sort of a death, but I need to make it more clear so that the stakes are raised. I also need to be more definitive about the inciting incident and when the journey begins.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 1 month ago by  Julie Scorziell.

[Rich Goldstein]

It’s readily apparent that the scene is masterfully written. We were given almost simultaneous introductions of a group of twelve characters, ensuring distinct personalities and voices come through as the story is unfolding. We can also glean who the toughest opponents are going to be for the protagonist. Combining certain actions and dialogue inherent in character traits reveals how conflict can be played out on various levels.

[Carol Kennedy]

This is what I love about ALL art forms – the subtle nuances. The dialogue is amazing and draws you in but very quietly. The environment that they are in is in very stark contrast to the Dark Knight but dealing with a lot of similar issues, only under a different forum. I went back and added some of these elements to my script and it’s SOOO much better!

[Ali Jordan]

What I learned is that if you edit your inciting incident then your entire screenplay needs to be updated as well. I actually simplified my inciting incident but I think it packs a bigger punch now. Problem is, tying everything else together to fit the new scene without forcing it.

[Ar Marewski]

What I am intrigued by is, that the character voting for “not guilty” is very calm and “contained”. He is not at all agitated by the time pressure some of the others are creating, his reasoning is very simple and at the same time puzzling: He’s the only one saying “no” but also the only one saying “I don’t know”. One would expect for him to start arguing. But he doesn’t. He just want’s to “talk”. His strong sense of justice is perceptible. Everybody else has his mind made up. But he is just honest about his not-knowing. As the scene progresses we find that most of the “knowing” of the other men comes from prejudice or laziness (Both of which in essence are the same). We want to know, who this man is, where his determination and courage come from and why he is willing to endure the averseness of eleven other men. When he talks about the deprived life of the defendant, we get the feeling he knows what he’s talking about – maybe out of his own life-experience? In the end of the scene, when the first man reluctantly starts talking and says:”It’s hard to put in words…”, I get the feeling the “no-sayer” is probably right and I’m drawn into the story, because now I want to know HOW all laziness and prejudice will be exposed.

I am not sure how to use the insight from the scene for my own opening just yet, it’s a totally different setting and genre, but maybe I find a way to plant something as powerful in my beginning. I’m really impressed by the simplicity of it. This man’s simple “I don’t know” has it all. And his courage to make it a point. And it’s even more relevant this day and age. We all think we ought to know, to the extend that we even make or believe fake news, just not to admit that we really don’t know.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 1 month ago by  Ar Marewski.

[John Woodward]

While 12 ANGRY MEN is based on a play that is dialogue driven, and is in a very different genre from my screenplay or THE DARK KNIGHT, all three opening scenes have in common the following elements: scene arc, situation, conflict, moving the story forward, entertainment value, setups/payoffs, invitation to the journey, challenging situations, interesting action, intriguing dialogue, and character motivations and/or needs that propel them to go on the journey.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 1 month ago by  John Woodward.

[Roddy Blelloch]

What I found so appealing with this scene is how the conflict was launched – not by the count of 11 to 1, or the one naysayer but the reaction of the juror who was most adamantly in opposition to the possibility of innocence – “Boy oh boy, there’s always one.” In an other wise low key opening this draws a line in the sand and suddenly intensifies the conflict. I felt my adrenaline rise instantly. This moment pushed the story forward and made me want to know how it would resolve itself.

[Christine Young]

This movie probably was an inspiration for someone like Aaron Sorkin. It has all the hallmarks of a Sorkin script. Conflict. Conflict. Conflict. I said it is a character study set in a contained space which helps raise the tension. It is an example of how choosing your subject matter, setting the location, and how characters with differing points of view help make a great story.