Day 20 Assignment

[Robert Springfield]

Rob Springfield’s Completed Act 3

What I learned doing this assignment is finishing pages first is more important than quality at this stage of writing.

OUTLINE REMAINING SCENES ACT 3

ACT 3: The family finally arrives at the casino strip in Las Vegas. Mark comes up with a good idea at the hotel to trick the killers that are laying wait.

EXT. LAS VEGAS – CASINO – BACK PARKING LOT – DAY

BEGINNING: Mark and Jeff arrive in the parking lot behind a casino hotel with several other cars. They know that John Stein and Manny are somewhere close by.

MIDDLE: Mark uses the app to trigger the car alarms of about 20 cars to divert attention away from them.

END: Several squad cars arrive with blaring sirens. Mark and family vanish amid the glare of police lights and noise.

INT. CASINO HOTEL/GAMING AREA – NIGHT

BEGINNING: Mark uses the app to hack into the hotel computer and get a room assignment under an alias.

MIDDLE: Mark uses the app to disguise himself and Jeff.

END: Jeff enters the gaming area unnoticed and begins to play near John Stein, but doesn’t realize it.

INT. GAMING AREA – NIGHT

BEGINNING: As Jeff wins big while sitting across from John Stein. Stein begins to suspect something from his appearance.

MIDDLE: Mark sees from across the room, and tries to get Jeff’s attention.

END: Stein’s men start to gradually appear as Jeff becomes more animated and oblivious at the table. Mark creates a distraction to get Jeff away from the table.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by  Robert Springfield.

[Arial Burnz]

Subject: Arial’s Act 3 – Outline Remaining Scenes of Act 3

What I learned doing this assignment is…that getting this information down and being flexible about the story at this stage is going to save me a ton of writing! AND this is a great way to lock in those scene cards so I can figure out how many pages I’m in for. It’s easier to delete a scene card than it is a written scene I’ve put my heart into. I’ve got LOTS of in-between scenes, so I can imagine I’ll be consolidating and cutting. But here they are…

Summary from the Midpoint to Turning Point 3…

• Midpoint – Syndra and Aylen escape, but Syndra dies and passes the map to the treasure, and her endorsement to the magic college, on to Aylen.
• React/Rethink – Aylen must do this alone now.
• Make a New Plan – Get the treasure, go to school, get revenge.

EXT. CITY OF THALLAN – DAY

Placeholder Scene: Not sure how this will go down because I need to come up with a Meet Cute for Aylen and Gwen. Gwen is a thief and will be Aylen’s “Jacopo”, but I don’t want to repeat what the Touchstone Pictures version did with the knife fight, which wasn’t in the original novel. I’m thinking Gwen will try to trick Aylen because her prisoner’s rags are a dead giveaway that she’s escaped. Gwen might try to get the reward for turning her in, but I want Gwen to be beholden to Aylen, so I’ve gotta work it out. They call her Nanwera – the Elvish word for ransom.

INT. THIEVES DEN – DAY

BEGINNING: Three Months Later – Aylen (Nanwera) is leaving and saying her goodbyes to the leader of the den.

MIDDLE: Aylen’s served her obligation to the thieves, but has also befriended them in this time, which will come in handy later in the story. We learn during this conversation that he’s got a thing for Aylen, but she is going off to learn magic at the lyceum and romance is not on her agenda right now. Revenge is.

END: He understands and wishes her well. He tells her he is there if she needs him…for anything. Good friends are hard to find. She vows she will call upon him when the time is right.

EXT. LOUREAN MOUNTAINS – DAY

BEGINNING: Gwen and Aylen leave the city and set off to go find the goblin king’s treasure, which – according to the hologram map – is deep in the Lourean Mountains in a place called Amon Fae.

MIDDLE: A montage of events shows them following the clues, which lead them to the hidden entrance to the treasure trove. They’re swimming in gold coins, jewels and the cavern is filled with riches beyond their imagination! Gwen suggests Aylen forget her revenge and find happiness in living anywhere in the world.

END: But Aylen refuses. She wants those who wronged her to pay, to suffer as she did, and for justice to be served for the child she lost. Gwen says she owes Aylen her life, so will do whatever she asks. Aylen asks her to go to Radario and use her thieves guild connections to learn what happened to Aylen’s family, friends and enemies since she was sent to prison. In the meantime, Aylen will go to the Lyceum in Havencrest and become a sorceress. They’ll meet back at the tavern in Thallan. Aylen will contact Gwen once she’s done with school.

INT. LYCEUM OF HAVENCREST – DAY

BEGINNING: Aylen arrives at the college and presents her medallion as proof of entry.

MIDDLE: The fee is substantial, but that’s no problem. She presents a chest filled with gold. Nice! She is introduced to her new mentor – Esmeralda Xandu – who questions Aylen about her education (Syndra in the prison for 15 years, but no hands-on experience – all book knowledge) and what her kinships are.

END: Aylen doesn’t know, so Esmeralda says they’ll help her learn all that.

INT. LYCEUM OF HAVENCREST – MONTAGE

BEGINNING: The montage will show Aylen getting tested and trained.

MIDDLE: Aylen starts out like someone with a loaded gun who has no experience with shooting, but we’ll see her progress.

END: Finally, we will see her receive her robes, showing her status as a Sorceress.

INT. LYCEUM OF HAVENCREST – DAY

BEGINNING: Esmeralda will give Aylen her own medallion, which is her license to practice magic. The robes are meant for formal occasions, worn if she is appointed as a royal mage, or when called upon by the high council. Otherwise, it is highly advised she wear civilian clothes. No need to draw attention to her status outside of those circumstances. She’d be asking for trouble. But she is to wear her medallion at all times.

MIDDLE: We learn in this goodbye between Aylen’s mentor and a few of the professors that Aylen has the record of having gone through the classes faster than any student in the entire world of Evanterra. There is one other student who held that record, but Aylen beat it by a few years. Who was she? Kylantha von Abel, the Queen of Solinta.

END: Whaaa??? Aylen does her best to keep her composure, but Esmeralda notices. Aylen says she is staggered by the news. To best the queen is quite an accomplishment. Aylen says her goodbyes and takes the faery portal back to Thallan on shaky legs.

INT. TAVERN (NEED NAME) IN THALLAN – DAY

BEGINNING: When Aylen arrives in Thallan and checks in at the tavern, Gwen has been there about a week and organizing her notes and intel.

MIDDLE: Of course, Aylen shares the news about Kylantha being queen. The mage part was expected, but the best in her class…in the world? Although Aylen beat her record in a landslide victory via time, the fact that Key is queen gives her political power. She might be harder to bring down. They’ll have to think about that one.

As for everyone else: Aylen’s mother died shortly after she went to prison; Qiren is now a Jewel of the Crown and legal advisor to Queen Kylantha (grrrr); Tanyth owns a couple of taverns in town now; Jaeros and his wife are poor and wasting away; and Dylan…he was the hardest to find. Gwen only just returned a week ago and with very little info about him.

END: Aylen wants all the details of her enemies. They need to discover their weaknesses, who they do business with, what are their current goals, and who is on their list of enemies. Let the avenging begin!

Placeholder Scene: Revenge against Tanyth – not sure what I’m doing yet.

Placeholder Scene: Revenge against Qiren – not sure what I’m doing yet.

INT. LOUREAN ROYAL COURTHOUSE – NIGHT

BEGINNING: Dylan turns in the latest criminal he’s apprehended and gets paid.

MIDDLE: The Lourean prefect who pays him says he did a little digging in Dylan’s case about trying to find proof of his father’s innocence, but he keeps getting stonewalled. Dylan tells him to stop looking. This has Kylantha all over it, and she’s too powerful to come up against. As Queen, she has the power to clear Dylan’s family name, but her price is too high – marriage. Although he could be king, he wouldn’t dare go up against her. She is a powerful mage. No. He’d become her lap dog. Forget it.

END: Dylan has to admit defeat and get on with his already ruined life. Why make it worse by becoming Key’s slave?

Things start going well, until… – When Aylen tries to entrap Dylan in her web of revenge, she learns he isn’t a bad guy and they reunite. Aylen loneliness and releasing of her anger has her wanting to give up on her quest to avenge herself, their baby, and Syndra.

Turning Point 3 – Before Aylen and Dylan can get on the road to leave the country, Dylan is kidnapped by Kylantha and demands a final confrontation with Aylen. Aylen has avoided confrontations, and although slowly has come around to realizing they cannot be avoided as often as she’d like, this final confrontation is what will push her to make that final inner change. Some things are worth fighting for in order to obtain peace.

[Harley Grant]

Harley Grant’s Completed Act 3

What I learned doing this assignment is to focus on the action and move the story forward without trying to be perfect.

Key Scene 1: Reaction/Rethink.

Beginning: Priyanka opens the envelope and takes out the letter. She carefully places the sheets of paper in front of her as she reads each page. When Priyanka finishes, she starts to cry.

Middle: Rick asks her what the letter says. Priyanka tells him that unless the document is a sick joke, her father may be alive.

End: Priyanka takes Rick’s car and heads out alone in search of her father.

Act 3, Key Scene 2

Beginning: Priyanka pulls up to a cabin on a lake. This is where her family used to spend the summer before her parents died. She walks up to the front door, opens it, and no one is there.

Middle: Priyanka opens empty cabinets, drawers with only cutlery, and a fridge with some stale food. Then, she takes her time to examine family photos. Priyanka pauses while looking at one picture with just her father and her. She smiles and decides to take it with her. As Priyanka begins to walk out, she hears a rustling under the floorboards. She turns around and her father Brahm walks up from a hidden door in the floor.

End: Beginning: Brahm and Priyanka embrace. She is in complete shock. Brahm explains that he was in a medically induced coma. When he woke up, his partner Ranu explained that Rohan had killed his wife and nearly killed him. Ranu persuaded Brahm that would be best if he stayed “dead” until things were either safe or it was necessary for him to come out of hiding. As a result of Rohan being released from prison, Brahm decided to have Ranu reach out to Priyanka.

Act 3, Key Scene 3:

Beginning: Priyanka has a ton of questions and explains to her father that Rohan has taken Sia. They decide that they will need to develop a plan to get Sia back.

Middle Brahm tells Priyanka that according to Ranu, Rohan has taken Sia to the family home with Raj who does not know that he is alive. Brahm tells her that he designed the house and it cannot be penetrated. Priyanka laughs and explains that she found a secret route out when she was a teen. Brahm smiles. Priyanka is smiling.

End: Things go well, until… The door swings open. Raj walks in. He points a gun at Brahm and says, “Hi, old man.”

Act 3 Turning Point

What I learned doing this assignment is that my protagonist’s low point is both a key part of her journey and another way to show the complexity of her character.

Beginning: Raj tells Brahm and Priyanka how happy and disappointed he is to see their father. Brahm tells Raj and Priyanka that Rohan killed their mother and nearly killed him. They were both left for dead. Brahm was forced to watch as his wife died in his arms.

Middle: Raj does not believe his father’s story. Brahm tells him to ask his partner. Raj sends a message to Rohan who arrives a few minutes later. Brahm confronts Rohan.

End: Rohan confirms the story. He shoots and kills Brahm and Raj. He takes a sobbing Priyanka out to his car and drives away.

Beginning: Priyanka turns on her cell phone and dials Rick. She yells at Rohan about killing her entire family.

Middle: Rohan and Priyanka arrive at the Priyanka’s childhood home. When they enter the house, Rohan’s guards take Priyanka’s phone and lock her in a bedroom.

End: Priyanka uses the only escape route – through the ventilation system and Rick is waiting for her at the back of the house.