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Day 26 Assignments
Reply to post your assignment.
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6 Replies
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Angelina Fluehler – Solved Character Problems!
“What I learned doing this assignment is…?” I checked all the points (A.-G.) – none of them is the case. Thanks for this check list. It is amazing to have them done.
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What I learned about doing this assignment is utilizing this checklist. It allows me to go deeper and make certain characters stronger. And I’m currently giving one of my lead characters a stronger voice and more scenes. This is an excellent checklist.
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Gerry Cousins – Solved Character Problems
What I learned doing this assignment: This was perhaps the most difficult assignment for me. I had to be perfectly honest with myself in order to move forward truthfully. Definitely this structure had a great deal to do with my dilemma. But I found out that cross skills, i.e. acting, could absolutely help me in this situations. The Lesson: Use everything at your disposal to get where you need to be.
Once again, I call your attention to the fact that this is a straight play in two acts and not a screenplay in four acts. It is also a play-within-a-play which has its own kind of structure. However, I have spent a full day thinking about my principal Antagonist. And while I hope I am not self-justifying, I think my Protagonist, JENNA and Antagonist, SID, who are also writing partners, do very well in moving the story forward. At the end, JENNA changes remarkably, and although SIID grows as a character, his change is not nearly so dramatic.
As an acting teacher, I taught my students in learning audition technique to break down their scenes into beats, figure out what they wanted in each beat and to use verbs—adjusting throughout– to achieve their goal. I have analyzed a few of the scenes that I thought may be weak insofar as the Antagonist is concerned. I find that the collegial relationship as colleagues that they enjoy, also includes a great deal of sparring between them but does not stop them from getting done what they set out to do.
Further, regarding the play-within-a-play structure, MOLLY is the clearly defined Protagonist. Everyone else is an effective Antagonist.
A.
Weak protagonist or antagonist. NO
B.
Protagonist Too Good or Antagonist Too Bad
NO.
C.
Weak character intros. NONE
D.
Characters not in action. Action ThROUGHOUT
THE PLAY
E.
Protagonist journey not strong.
VERY STRONG
F.
All the characters seem the same.
NO
G.
Lead characters not present. ALWAYS
PRESENTIn summation, there was one change I did make near the end of the play. It was a question delivered by the Protagonist to which the Antagonist does not respond.
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Carol Dougherty’s Solved Character Problems
What I learned doing this assignment: As I went through scenes to see what needed help, I realized that even a single action or series of actions can have an emotional impact on a scene. As human beings, we rarely do anything without a reason, and the same should go for our characters. Sometimes we don’t even know ourselves why we do something – I remember an episode of M*A*S*H in which Hawkeye tells a woman why he wants to marry her and all the while he is moving, literally trapping himself in a corner. It was brilliant. So I tried to use that kind of emotional response that expresses itself in action.
Character problems: One of the problems listed jumped out at me and I know it’s the primary one to be addressed. It’s D. Characters not in action. I tend to start with dialogue because for whatever reason, that comes easier for me. And this is not an action film, so I really have to work to make the action meaningful, other than in rehearsal or on the stage. In the more problematic scenes, I tend to have characters facing off, which is fine up to a point. I’ve found a few scenes that really are in need of some action and worked on those.
First scene update:
INT. PUB – NIGHT
Pen, Terry, Kate, and Sebastian are at a favorite pub. The front area, where the bar is, has most of the tables and a darts area. They sit on a slightly elevated level at a round table which is usually where Sebastian holds court when he comes in. On this night, everyone else is leaving them alone.
Pen notices Kate has her attention on Terry, who is telling a story, but she seems miles away. She glances at Sebastian, who is watching them, and she takes a drink.
TERRY
I don’t think any of you are listening. I am offended.
(with a grin)
SEBASTIAN
Nonsense. You were telling Katelyn about your music hall experiences.
KATE
You all seem to love the old English music halls. Too bad there’s nothing like it around here.
TERRY
I’ve seen some DVDs and CDs online. Not quite the same, but not bad. And there’s always Olivier’s film, The Entertainer. Sebastian, care for a game of darts?
PEN
I am not coming over to watch you two play again. It’s pathetic.
SEBASTIAN
Never mind, my darling. You and Katelyn can sit here and deplore our appalling lack of skill.
Terry and Sebastian go over to the darts, several other members of the company move from the bar to join them.
As soon as they are out of earshot, Kate speaks.
KATE
Pen, did I upset you at rehearsal today?
PEN
No.
KATE
Then what happened? Why wouldn’t you talk with me?
PEN
(with a rueful smile)
I’m not very good at explaining myself. Maybe I need someone to write my lines for me.
Kate smiles back and waits.
PEN
There’s nothing else when I work. Nothing. No one. And Viola is not an easy part for me, as you may have noticed.
(drinks)
Sebastian has a way of working that encourages actors to deep and uncover truths that are difficult to experience at times. No one can explain exactly what he does or how he does it, but I’ve never met anyone who can bring out a performance like he can.
(she watches him play darts for a moment)
His rehearsals are inspiring, exhilarating, and exhausting. Terry can dive into a part, shatter everyone in the rehearsal hall with his emotional intensity, then during the break he can laugh and chat like nothing happened. I can’t.
KATE
I’ve seen you talk with Terry during breaks.
PEN
(shakes her head)
Not the same thing. We’re acting together, he’s my partner. We’ve been a part of each other’s lives since we were children.
KATE
I appreciate your candor, Pen. I can’t say I completely understand it, but I’ll try not to invade your space in rehearsals again.
The front door of the pub opens, and they both look
up at the stranger, a young man, who enters. The color drains from Kate’s face and she gets to her feet. Pen gets up and stands beside her, watching him.
The young man, MICHAEL (27), moves through the crowd with the regal grace of a lion, and lights up the room with an aura of burnished gold, from the wavy locks that cascade to his shoulders to the metallic shimmer of gold threads woven into the fabric of his shirt.
He checks each booth and table, hunting for someone. Terry gets one look at him and goes over to greet him. They speak briefly and Terry points toward Pen and Kate.
Michael’s head snaps around. He sees Kate and lets out a crow of delight.
MICHAEL
Kate! Finally.
KATE
Michael.
She watches him lope toward them with a poker face, and Pen wonders who he is and why Kate doesn’t seem too happy to see him.
KATE
What are you doing here? I only got your letter today?
MICHAEL
Fine. I’m fine.
(he appraises her with a glance)
You look good, Kate, really good. This place agrees with you.
He flashes an ingratiating smile at Pen.
MICHAEL
(to Kate)
Aren’t you going to introduce me?
KATE
Of course. Pen, this is a friend of mine from school, Michael Lindquist. Michael, Penny Parrish.
Pen holds out a hand to him.
PEN
(friendly, not warm)
How nice to meet a friend of Katie’s.
His eyes narrow when Pen calls her Katie.
MICHAEL
Wow.
(he shakes hands)
It’s great to meet you Ms. Parrish. I love your work. Kate must have told you we drove through the night last fall to catch your final performance in Antony and Cleopatra.
Pen glances at Kate, startled. Kate refuses to meet her eyes.
PEN
No, she didn’t say, but then we’ve had quite a busy rehearsal schedule.
Michael shoots an irritated look at Kate, then turns the smile back on when Terry and Sebastian rejoin them.
PEN
Michael Lindquist, I’d like you to meet Sebastian St. James and Terence Patrick Gibbs. Michael is a friend of Katie’s.
Everyone sits at the table and more drinks appear. Michael and Terry are seated next to one another and are engaged in a quiet discussion, while Kate sits watches Michael apprehensively. Sebastian also observed Terry and Michael with a slight frown. He exchanged concerned glances with Pen.
PEN
(quietly)
Katie? I think I’m going to head home. Would you like to walk with me?
KATE
(glances at Michael)
I don’t think so. I think I’ll stay awhile.
Down near the bar, Sandy put on her jacket. Pen slid out of her seat.
PEN
I’m knackered. Think I’ll catch a ride with Sandy.
She darts toward the door to intercept Sandy.
PEN
Sandy! Would you mind dropping me off at the farm?
Sandy spins around, red curls bouncing.
SANDY
Sure, my car’s right outside.
Sandy and Pen exit. Pen glances up to the elevated table and Kate is watching her.
Second scene update:
INT. PEN’S DRESSING ROOM – NIGHT – IMMEDIATELY AFTER CURTAIN
Pen is in her dressing room in her opening night party dress. Her only jewelry is the silver pear necklace Danni gave her on the chain Kate gave her. She stands at her makeup table and inhales the fragrance of the deep peach roses in the vase. The card simply says, Kate.
Pen goes to the door, nervous about the opening night party and what Kate will say to her. She squares her shoulders and opens the door to find about to knock on the other side. Kate’s flushed face tells Pen she remembers this is exactly how they met for the first time.
PEN
(steps back)
Katie, do come in.
KATE
Just for a second.
Kate enters and moves to the center of the room, between the chair and chaise, using them as a barricade.
KATE
It was a wonderful performance tonight, Pen. Terry would have been proud.
PEN
Thank you.
KATE
I wanted to tell you myself – I’ve accepted the job in Chicago.
Pen struggles not to show any feeling other than polite interest on her face.
PEN
You have? When will you go?
KATE
Soon. Sebastian said whenever I’m ready. Sometime next week, I guess.
PEN
You must be very happy.
KATE
Must I?
PEN
Well, aren’t you? I thought this was what you wanted.
They stare at each other, Pen confused, Kate composed on the surface. Only the tense set of her shoulders shows there is something powerful being held back.
PEN
Don’t go, Katie.
KATE
Why not?
PEN
You said it yourself before, you could spend years with Sebastian and never stop learning.
KATE
That’s true.
PEN
Then why go?
KATE
We both know the answer to that.
Pen paces, like a tiger in a cage. During the next few exchanges, she circles the chair and chaise lounge area where Kate stands, as if trying to contain Kate.
PEN
I don’t. You love the company. You know Sebastian wants you to direct. Why do you have to go?
KATE
Why did you do it, Pen? Why did it have to be so public? Did you need a stage?
PEN
Is that what you think?
KATE
What else can I think? How many times have we been alone since you got back – not one word. Were you just using me to get everyone’s sympathy?
PEN
(stops in her tracks, facing Kate)
How can you think that? I wanted you to know that I meant it, that I wanted to tell the whole world that I love you.
Kate listens, her face stony.
PEN
And I wanted to tell you as soon as I got back. But you were so angry with me you never gave me a chance. When I had time to think about it, I thought maybe I should do what you would have done.
KATE
You think I’d have left you hanging like that after what we shared before you left? You don’t know me at all if you think that.
PEN
Katie, what I’m trying to say is that it seemed as if you had made a decision for yourself. And that I had to honor that decision, as you would have. I just wanted to give you the same kind of respect you tried to give me.
Kate stares at her, incredulous.
KATE
I’m trying to understand, Pen. But if you loved me, why didn’t you respond at all to my letter? Do you have any idea at all how much that hurt me?
PEN
Would you sit down and let me try to explain? I feel like you’re all set to flee if I say the wrong thing. And I know the last time I tried to explain myself it didn’t make much sense.
Kate sits on the gilt chair and Pen sits across from her on the edge of the chaise lounge.
PEN
I told you about my dad leaving and about Danni’s suicide. What I didn’t tell you was that I felt responsible for both.
KATE
You couldn’t have been.
PEN
No, but for a long time I believed I was, and I couldn’t even tell Terry, especially about Danni, because I was sure I’d lose him, too. When your letter came, I was in the midst of sorting all of that out. I’d no idea what to say to you because all I wanted right then was for you to come and be with me through all of it.
KATE
I would have come, Pen.
PEN
(smiles)
I know you would. And that’s why I couldn’t talk to you. I needed to do it on my own.
KATE
Thank you for telling me.
Pen’s shoulders sag a little as she can see Kate is not completely convinced. She takes one of Kate’s hands in hers and looks down at it as she speaks.
PEN
There’s a line in Much Ado About Nothing, “Taming my wild heart to thy loving hand.” I always thought it sounded like a prison sentence and I never wanted to offer anyone a tamed, watered-down heart to keep on a leash.
She lifts Kate’s hand to her cheek for a moment and closes her eyes. Kate’s eyes are riveted to her, and she is barely breathing as she waits for what Pen will say next.
PEN
Before Danni died my heart was wild, passionate, fierce. And I thought that heart died with Danni. Until I met you.
Pen opens her eyes to meet Kate’s.
PEN
What you awoke in me wasn’t just that young girl’s heart, it was the heart of the woman I’d become, with all of my shame and regret, my grief and loss, and a depth of love I never even imagined. Katie, from the day we went out in the rowboat there has been no one else, not Sam or anyone.
KATE
Why not?
PEN
Because I love you and only you.
KATE
And I love you.
Kate brings her other hand up to cradle Pen’s face in her hands and they come together in a kiss of fierce tenderness.
A knock on the door interrupts them.
PEN
(her voice hoarse)
Yes?
MICHAEL (V.O.)
Pen, people are asking for you at the party. Will you be coming soon?
Pen and Kate laugh quietly.
PEN
Thanks, Michael. Be there shortly.
They sit and look at each other for a moment with radiant smiles. Pen stands and pulls Kate up with her.
PEN
Would you like to be my date for the opening night party?
KATE
I’d love to.
Pen holds out her hand and Kate takes it. They walk to the door together.
FADE TO BLACK
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Wow. Wow. Wow. I have had an awakening. When I started this class, I had an opening scene in mind, and it’s pretty good as a standalone scene. And my second scene was “OK” too, but a little less. And each lesson I wrote seemed to deviate more and more from the premises of the lessons. I was feeling uneasy, like “why is it so hard to write what’s needed in this lesson?” And then we got to “fixing structural issues”.
At that point, as I laid out my beats, it became obvious that what I had was a mess. The story was disjointed, narrow, it needed air. Worse, I had not really “told the story” at all. There was no friendship in my story, or ambition, jealousy, betrayal. No secrets, no intrigue. It was a bare bones action packed movie without much “drama”, and worse, it simply didn’t do what the instructions were for the assignments. It wasn’t about humans.
I have had an epiphany! And the epiphany alone is well worth what I paid for the course. I am going to go back and start with a brand new pitch; to support it I’m going to outline four acts in some detail for this new screenplay. I’m going to apply everything I’ve learned to ensuring that I’m not deviating from the structures and techniques presented in this course. I’m going to write a brand new 20% screenplay, and then I’m going to apply all the “corrective” lessons at the end – structure, dialog, characters.
You have shown me the errors of my ways, and I can’t thank you enough. It’ll be a little lonlier writing this new screenplay, but it’ll be MUCH better as a first draft than ANYTHING I could have made out of the half-baked screenplay I’ve got so far.
Thank you. I’ll be back.
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M.M.’s Solved Character Problems
What I learned in this assignment are the various character problems and the questions to ask to fix them before moving on to the 2nd draft.
Placeholders needed to resolve all these issues:
A. Weak protagonist or antagonist.
B. Protagonist Too Good or Antagonist Too Bad.
C. Weak character intros.
D. Characters not in action.
E. Protagonist journey not strong.
F. All the characters seem the same.
G. Lead characters not present.Specifics:
Lead Character/Protagonist: Bella Cortez – need to show the other side – anger, tears – she is too level-headed and one-sided and needs to break down earlier before she calls Luke after she locks herself in the bathroom after Emilio knocks her down (and possibly hurts the baby).
A – too weak; B. too good; C. weak character intro; E. protagonist journey could be stronger with the pro life movement
Lead Character/Antagonist: Emilio Cruz – Need to show redeeming qualities such as kindness or tolerance instead of just his hot-headedness, arrogance,and violent temper.
B. Too bad; C. Character not always in action; G. lead character not always present
Supporting Character: Luke Morrison – need more interaction with Mia showing his frustration/anger with her instead of just putting up with her; he needs to put his foot down and break up with her – too cliché to do it in a restaurant but something else public would work better – Mia can explode at the MLB draft too and he has to have her removed. C. weak character intro; D. character needs more action F. character seems the same as others;
Supporting Character: Coach Matt Morrison – need more interaction with Bella relative to agents. C. weak character intro; D. character needs more action F. Character seems the same as others;
Recurring Characters: Hector and Inez (primarily Inez): B. Too bad, not showing the good side enough; C. weak character intro; D. character needs more action; F. Character seems the same as others.
Recurring Character: Valentina (Bella’s mom): B. Too good; C. weak character intro; D. character needs more action F. character seems the same as others.
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