Day 3 Assignments

[Wendy Weising]

Assignment 3

Wendy Weising’s Pilot Structure

What I learned doing this assignment is everything continues to change, which is good. It’s getting better.

Present the first draft of your pilot Acts.

Teaser:

Essence: Jane stands with her
army, overlooking the enemy, and yells charge. They clash with the enemy,
sword to sword. <div>

<div>

Turning Point: Just as Jane
swings her sword, she slaps her husband who was sleeping next to her. He
grabs her arm and yells, waking Jane. When she tells him the dream, he
laughs at her and tells her that he can’t think of anyone less likely to
be a warrior. She can’t even confront their kids.

Act 1:

Essence: Jane tries to be the
perfect wife and mother, but her husband controls her, her kids don’t
listen to her, and she’s afraid to confront the kids’ coach for putting
her kids down. Her husband always ends up fixing things for her, which
makes her feel useless, so she shuts down for a couple of days and then
works harder to be perfect.</div><div>

Turning Point: Dan tells Jane
to check the mailbox for an important letter. When she does, a car that
suspiciously looks like his slams into her.

Act 2:

Essence: Jane wakes up in a
hospital, in restraints. When she begins to scream for her kids, Dr. Zyn
tries to calm her down, and Dr. Jones tells her that she has no kids.
Polly spies on them. After they leave, Polly and Ava scurry into the room.
Polly cleans while Ava presents food. Ava wants to take off the
restraints. Polly isn’t sure but produces a key. Ava frees Jane. </div><div>

Turning Point/Midpoint: Jane waits
until she is alone at night and then sneaks out of the room. She runs down
dark hall after dark hall, trying to find a way out of the hospital. She
sees light coming from under a door and goes through it. Doctors have just
taken the top off a comatose patients’ skull and are cutting out part the
brain. She thinks she sees one of them taste it. Polly and Ava, who have
followed Jane, pull her out of the room. Polly tells Jane, “This isn’t a
hospital. Those aren’t doctors.” Ava says, “There’s only one way patients leave
here—dead.” Just then Dr. Jones appears with two nurses. They drag Jane
back to her room. She doesn’t resist.

Act 3:

Essence: Jane lies in her bed
in restraints again. She has shut down and won’t talk. Dr. Zyn argues with
Dr. Jones about the restraints. He loses. Dr. Jones rails against Ava and
Polly, but when her back is turned, Polly steals a book off her shelf and
winks at Ava. Later, they go to Jane’s room. Ava sings a song about a bird
being poisoned as she strokes Jane’s hair. Polly shushes her and holds up
a book. </div><div>

Turning Point: When Jane
finally reads the note in the book, it says, “Don’t believe them. They’re
lying.” Ava sings, “We’re bustin’ outta here.”

Act 4:

Essence: Jane has snapped out
of her depression and is questioning Polly and Ava about the hospital.
Suddenly, Dr. Jones enters with a group of nurses and shoos Polly and Ava
out of the room. The nurses begin inserting tubes into Jane. She panics.
Dr. Jones tells her they’re just giving her some fluids. They put a mask
over her face and squeeze a bottle of a gray, gelatinous substance through
a hole in the mask. She falls asleep. </div><div>

Turning Point: Dr. Jones makes
a deal with Polly: She becomes her spy or she becomes brain serum. Dr.
Jones is hosting a party. When Ava appears dressed in an evening gown, Dr.
Jones introduces her to a hideous-looking man who takes her hand and leads
her out of the room. Dr. Jones tells Dr. Zyn that she has chosen him as
her mate, and then she announces it to the party.

Act 5:

Essence: Dr. Zyn enters Jane’s
room while she’s sleeping. He strokes her hair, kisses her forehead, and
whispers, “I will always love you.” Polly is watching. She tells Dr. Jones.
Dr. Jones reminds Dr.
Zyn that they will mate that night after dinner and that if he doesn’t
want Jane to mysteriously die, he had better perform well and often. She
has all the tubes and restraints taken off Jane. </div>

Lock In: She asks Jane if there
is anything she wants to know. Jane asks her is what the hospital really
is. She tells Jane the truth: It is a facility where her own alien race
extracts human brain tissue and chemicals for a serum. They need it to
survive. She tells her that she will never be able to escape, and if she
tries again, she next on the brain donner list. Jane won’t want that
because she does have children…in another facility. Jane decides she must
escape.

</div>

[Ben Ather]

Subject line: Ben’s Pilot Structure

What I learned doing this assignment is

I tried to make the structure about Rain and left out other stories for sake of the flow, but that may change in the future, considering that other stories have strong turning points also. Especially Array reveal of who he is.

ASSIGNMENT

===========

1. Present the first draft of your pilot Acts.

PILOT STRUCTURE

Teaser:

Essence: A rift appears in the sky, sucking land and everything into it. Terra and four sorcerers attempt to seal it, with four sorcerers sacrificing their lives.

Turning Point: Terra and four sorcerers stopped the rift from wreaking havoc, but it’s still there, held together by giant chains.

Act 1:

Essence: Rain is an ugly beggar girl shun by everyone, even beggars and ugly ones. Her adopted beggar sister has taken over their shelter and forces her out of the city. There is rumour that she caused her mother’s death in childbirth.

Turning Point: Rain discovers her birth father, Eucher, abandoned her because she’s ugly to learn magic and bring pride to the family. Turns out magic is taught to pretty ones.

Act 2:

Essence: Rain locks herself in the shelter after finding out the truth of her abandonment. Old Beggar tries to make her feel better. It doesn’t work.

Turning Point/Midpoint: Rain tells Old Beggar her decision to learn magic to prove Eucher wrong and wants his help to get into the Affinity Academy.

Act 3:

Essence: Old Beggar refuses to help Rain because of the rule. Rain decides to find her own way and meets Mani who can get her into the Affinity Academy, but she has to pay double the charge. Rain looks for a job.

Turning Point: Grocery man mocks Rain, and she steals his money but gets caught and beaten almost to death.

Act 4:

Essence: Rain uses her condition and life to threaten Old Beggar into helping her. Left with no choice, Old Beggar takes Rain to strange sorcerer who can make her a special disguise.

Turning Point: Turns out wearing the disguise for too long will lead to Rain’s demise and must decide whether to go ahead with it.

Act 5:

Essence: Rain goes ahead with the disguise and returns to the city with Old Beggar to join the children. They get into the Affinity Academy as new recruits.

Turning Point: Turns out Old Beggar is actually Terra the head of the Affinity Academy and conspired with Mani who caused Rain pain.

[Timothy Barley]

Tim Barley’s Pilot Structure

What I learned from doing this assignment is that this was very helpful to highlight each act without having to get too deep into writing it all out.

TEASER:

Essence: A young Alex stands in a hallway with his father in a large, dark home. His father tells him that he must go into the room and he has to wait there. The door shuts and we see a bright light from under the door…

Turning point: As we transition now to a bored adult Alex at his desk reading about historical conspiracy theories.

ACT 1:

Essence: Alex is just going through life’s motions. He is good at things, talks to people easily, plays sports well, and could be great. But, he’s obviously just running from something and wants to “not make waves.”

Turning point: Alex’s boss wants him to do more work while they “look to hire someone.”

ACT 2:

Essence: Working late, Alex stops by a coffee shop for coffee on the way home where they get his order wrong. Wishing it were different, it suddenly is.

Turning point: While thinking he is being followed, a dark car with mysterious occupants begins following him and chases him through downtown city streets.

ACT 3:

Essence: Alex makes it home to find his neighbor Allistar there waiting for him. Feenix arrives soon after.

Turning point: Between their family squabbling, they two of them tell him about his past and who he is what he needs to do.

ACT 4:

Essence: Alex faces the truth about his power and navigates his office in a new light, as in another part of the world, Edris gets an assignment in LA.

Turning point: Alex has to now figure out who wants to help him and who wants to kill him or worse.

ACT 5:

Essence: Alex enters the world of the unseen to learn more about who he is as Edris arrives in LA and tells him his side of things.

Turning point: Alex can no longer hide from his past. Everyone wants something from him. He can do more and more things. Humans are after him. The Ancient Houses are after him. His friends may or may not have ulterior motives. And there’s something about someone close to him radioing a message to someone with some advanced technology, even for us.

[Linda Anderson]

Linda Anderson’s Pilot Structure

What I learned doing this assignment is I probably need to make the turning points more outrageous but they’re not coming to me yet.

First draft of pilot Acts.

Teaser:

Essence: Louise’s over-the-top reaction to having her memoir rejected

Turning Point: Blinded by tears, Louise plunges her bicycle into Derrick’s car

Act 1:

Essence: Each main character has been rejected and is a loser in an important way.

Turning Point: Introduce all lead characters and their worlds.

Act 2:

Essence: Louise and Derrick connect when she plows into his car. The accident prompts them to tell the truth to each other about what failures their lives are.

Turning Point: Derrick waits with Louise while she’s in hospital observation. The sequence of events about her dream of being a famous author and finding out her memoir had been rejected shows how she became hysterical. Derrick tells Louise his real life story as a “recovering” alcoholic. Louise is uninterested, even annoyed. He needs her to care.

Act 3:

Essence: Louise and Derrick each switch to secretly lying to each other.

Turning Point: To gain Louise’s attention, Derrick passes off Chester’s (Derrick’s crime boss father) life story as his own. Louise is so impressed that she resolves to steal Derrick’s/Chester’s life and write a fake memoir that will make her a bestseller.

Act 4:

Essence: Derrick wants Louise to care about him. Louise wants to use Derrick to make her a successful author.

Turning Point: Derrick offers to teach Louise clowning. Spice up her life so she has a more interesting memoir to rewrite. She accepts his invitation in order to spend time secretly interviewing him and cover up her deception.

Act 5: Lock In

Essence: The stakes are raised.

Turning Point: Louise gets medical report that she has age-related macular degeneration and may be going blind. Now she’s working against time to achieve her dreams. Derrick hides a bottle in the glove compartment of his car. Feels desperate to connect with Louise before he drinks himself to death.

[Laurie Brown]

(Laurie Brown’s) Pilot Structure 1.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to use the framework more to my advantage.

Teaser:

Essence: Geri is a mama’s girl, over achiever and just wishes she could make her mom happy.

Turning Point: Running home with her straight A report card she finds her mom in the kitchen in a pool of blood.

ACT 1:

Essence: Determined to protect her estranged Dad she takes a picture and steals the hat at the scene of the crime –

Turning Point: vowing to her mother to gain the power she never had and find the real cause of her mother’s death.

ACT 2:

Essence: Her estranged Dad drops her off at military school where his friend, the headmaster, promises to “take care of her”

Turning Point: With Marge’s help- the headmaster finds the hat in her belongings and steals it from her, saying girls will never grow up to be in the Army.

ACT 3:

Essence: Marge and Bette befriend her, tell her the rules and tell her they will show her how to please the headmaster and stand up to the bullying from the other girls.

Turning Point/Midpoint: Geri makes up a big story about her obsessive- compulsive disorder, gaining their sympathy and alliance, but swears them to secrecy.

ACT 4:

Essence: Graduation Day and Marge, Bette and Geri vow to each other that when the army allows women to enlist they will be the first amongst them. Geri vows to be the first female colonel in the US Army.

Turning Point: Bette and Marge help Geri steal back the hat.

ACT 5:

Essence: They graduate nursing school and get jobs with the Army. Bette goes to Korea. Geri meets Leo and falls in love and they get engaged.

Turning Point: Marge gets sick and is quarantined. Then Geri gets sick, too.

[Elizabeth Dickinson]

Module 3 Lesson 3 Creating Pilot Structure

Elizabeth Dickinson’s Pilot Structure

What I learned doing this assignment is parts of this are relatively straightforward.

1. Present the first draft of your pilot Acts.

Teaser:

Essence:
Oversoul wants to become angel
Turning Point:
Oversoul learns it must purge regrets of 5 past lives, starting with young
1^st century Celt boy who becomes gladiator.

Act 1:

Essence: Celt
and best friend Coran discover Romans near their village
Turning Point: Celt
and friend tell the village. Village prepares – some villagers hide, some
stay.

Act 2:

Essence: Romans
arrive, say they want young boys to serve the emperor.
Turning
Point/Midpoint: Celt volunteers to go, along with twin Piran and Tyran.

Act 3:

Essence: Coran
follows Romans, invites Celt to escape.
Turning Point:
Celt returns to camp to bring Piran. Cletus cuts out Piran’s tongue.

Act 4:

Essence: Piran
won’t leave with Celt and Coran.
Turning Point:
Celt won’t leave Piran.

Act 5:

· Essence: Celt discovers translating and teaching Latin is considered enemy collaboration by peers. Celt tries to cut out his own tongue.

· Turning Point: Spurius believes Celt is of no more use as translator. Celt is abandoned to the low value slaves. Celt leaves Britannicus on a ship.

[P.G. Sundling]

Teaser:

Essence: Maria is president and nuclear war happens on her watch.

Turning Point: A strange creature rises from the mushroom clouds of a nuked city.

Act 1:

Essence: Maria and James started a billion-dollar software company, but Renquist steals control of it with a shady contract. Renquist will kill Maria once he has found all copies of the surveillance tapes. Renquist attacks James in every way, even petty things like blocking his unemployment. Lawyers and friends won’t return his calls because everyone is afraid of Renquist.

Turning Point: James decides to run for president, as a power-up to defend against Renquist’s power and influence.

Act 2:

Essence: James wants MJ to be his VP, but he has to prove he can bluff. He bluffs some punks with steam in a steampunk bar. After the bar, they do a practice campaign video with James drunk that goes off the rails.

Turning Point/Midpoint: In spite, Maria uploads the embarrassing video unedited.

Act 3:

Essence: James wakes up in Maria’s bed thinking they had drunk sex, but he’s still fully clothed. James goes home and finds his apartment in shambles. Maria confesses about the surveillance tapes. They rush to MJ’s place where there are intruders.

Turning Point: Maria attacks and chases the intruders, but instead of catching them, she gets taken away by police.

Act 4:

Essence: Renquist has crooked cops on his payroll. One of Renquist’s people interrogates None in the police station. They offer him a deal if he’ll turn on Maria, but he doesn’t. The embarrassing video where he talked about being like None of the Above went viral but no one is talking about James Wong.

Turning Point: James changes his name to None of the Above and gets Maria to change her name to More Jobs to match their viral video.

Act 5:

Essence: The name changes are successful. James blamed his brother Shen for losing the company as his lawyer. Out of options, None of the Above(None) makes peace with his brother and asks him to be the campaign manager. Shen goes over the remaining options in the contract, but no options are useful. Out of options on using the contract, they are committed to the president idea.

Lock In: They have to get on the ballot before Take Back America realizes they’re a real campaign.

[Avi K]

Avi Kapurala’s PILOT STRUCTURE

What I learned doing this assignment is: Everything continues to evolve and change. It’s a great experience.

Teaser:

Essence: Viktor, Jacob and Maya are introduced. Viktor’s boxing match is the centerpiece.

Turning Point: Jacob and Maya have a drink together, after many years.

Act 1:

Essence: Viktor and Maya Brazhinsky are a power-couple in the world of finance. Their marriage is strained. Maya’s father is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, bringing up family tensions. Someone is secretly following Viktor’s movements.

Turning Point: Maya’s father gets hit by a car when he wanders out due to his Alzheimer’s. Maya meets her family after a very long time (Maya’s loneliness wound is triggered, Viktor’s wound of the affair between her and Jacob is triggered by Jacob sending her flowers).

Act 2:

Essence: Maya’s father dies, adding emotional strain to the Brazhinsky’s marriage. They are prepping for a huge M&A deal amidst the tension.

Turning Point/Midpoint: Maya’s father dies, Viktor is blackmailed by Jacob with the evidence he has gathered on the stock manipulation of PrimaCorp. Viktor makes a mysterious phone call. (Jacob’s wound of his hatred for Viktor and his father is triggered).

Act 3:

Essence: Viktor sees his dominatrix, then tells his clients he’s dropping the deal and deals with the disappointment with his staff. Has a showdown with Maya where he punches her.

Turning Point: Maya leaves Viktor (Viktor’s worst fear is triggered).

Act 4:

Essence: Viktor tries to make things better by attending Maya’s father’s funeral, but things go south and a showdown between Viktor, Maya’s family and Jacob. He is arrested?

Turning Point: Jacob invites Maya to get away with him to his retreat and relive old days.

Act 5:

Essence: Viktor kills Claire Logan and disposes off her body. Jacob shows Maya proof…

LOCK IN: Viktor’s deal is lost losing him millions. His wife has decided to leave him and Jacob vows to destroy Viktor completely. Jacob has evidence that Viktor is a killer. How will he use it?