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Day 4 Assignment
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Janeen’s Character Story Lines
What I learned doing this assignment is I had to move a few things around to accommodate appropriate turning points for each act. Each character’s story is spread differently throughout the acts which means some acts will feature more about one character than another. Short scenes can be used later so we don’t “lose” characters for a lot of time between acts when their story isn’t front and center. I haven’t done that yet.
Cara’s Story:
Beginning: Cara and Mindy are lifelong friends. She is a mind control/intentional medicine practitioner in LA.
Turning Point: At Christmas, gets asked to be the executor/guardian of the twins’ estate if anything happens to Mike/Mindy.
Midpoint: Gets a call that Mike and Mindy are dead and she has obligations to the family. Comes to the farm, believes she should take the kids back to LA and rent out the farmland. Goes to the funeral and meets Jim who she’s heard about for years. He is very charming.
Turning Point 2: Her boyfriend breaks up with her — not willing to take on temporary kids/family.
Major Conflict: Randi convinces her that a huge part of the kids’ legacy will be gone if she doesn’t farm for them — Mike’s brothers will come down from Alaska.
Ending: Opts to stay, out of guilt that she may have caused Mike/Mindy’s accident with her own wish for Mike. Thinks Jim/Hunter will help her and then sees Jim’s violence
Randi’s Story:
Beginning: Randi loves being the aunt/grandmother to the twins and her matriarchal position on the farm.
Turning Point: Randi finds out she has Alzheimer’s
Midpoint: Randi tells Mindy she has Alzheimer’s
Turning Point 2: Mike and Mindy die and she realizes she has to make Cara stay or risk losing the twins’ legacy that she has promised to pass on.
Major Conflict: How can she get Cara to stay?
Ending: Convinces Cara to stay, but sees that Cara is thinking of Jim as a replacement for the boyfriend (and Mike) she just lost. Wonders if Cara will still come when she sees Jim get violent with his boys.
Mindy’s Story:
Beginning: Cara and Mindy are best friends. Cara talks to her in college about how great Mike is, but already taken. Cara is gone 2nd semester and she gloms onto Mike, securing him before Cara returns.
Turning Point: Molly dies and something doesn’t seem right. She and Mike investigate.
Midpoint: Randi tells Mindy about her Alzheimer’s — makes her promise not to tell Mike or Cara and make Cara take over the farm or Mike’s brothers from Alaska will get it, not the twins as Mike (and his deceased dad) wants.
Turning Point 2: Mindy talks Cara into it, but gets a premonition about her own death — Jim or Cara?
Major Conflict: Mindy has to decide to enlist Cara for taking over the farm and Mike wants to expose the evidence they have that Molly’s death may not have been a suicide.
Ending: Car Crash into train.
Jim’s Story:
Beginning: Jim and Mike are buddies growing up with Jim’s dad being a mean drunk who impresses on Jim that they need more land and he should marry it. Jim is into Molly for the land and because she is cute, but she is into Mike who she is dating.
Turning Point: Mike goes to college and Molly still refuses him until Mike comes home and ditches her.
Midpoint: Molly agrees to marry him and he does so for her land. His dad dies soon after.
Turning Point 2: Molly has Hunter just 8 months after they marry and he thinks Mike is the biological father.
Major Conflict: Blows up at Molly and she commits suicide. (perhaps only the funeral scene or we see Molly die at the crossing)
Ending: 1. Jim sees Mike and Molly’s death as a chance to get more land and tells his sons that’s what they must do — find a way to farm Mike and Molly’s land and eventually take over the rental land. 2. Jim vamps Cara and the boys fight about it on the way out.
5. First Version of my Outline:
Teaser: The accident
Essence: Mike and Mindy leave for a NYE party, Mindy chats with Cara about her boyfriend and desire for a baby. They crash into a train when there are no brakes on their car.
Turning Point: The word “Molly” uttered between Mike and Mindy as they crash.
Act 1:
Essence: (C Beginning) Cara and Mindy are lifelong friends. She is a mind control/intentional medicine practitioner in LA.; (M Beginning) Cara and Mindy are best friends. Cara talks to her in college about how great Mike is, but already taken. Cara is gone 2nd semester and she gloms onto Mike, securing him before Cara returns;
(J Beginning): Jim and Mike are buddies growing up with Jim’s dad being a mean drunk who impresses on Jim that they need more land and he should marry it. Jim is into Molly for the land and because she is cute, but she is into Mike who she is dating.
(J Turning Point 1): Mike goes to college and Molly still refuses him until Mike comes home and ditches her.
(J Midpoint:) Molly agrees to marry him and he does so for her land. His dad dies soon after.
(J Turning Point 2): Molly has Hunter just 8 months after they marry and he thinks Mike is the biological father.
(R Beginning) Randi loves being the aunt/grandmother to the twins and her matriarchal position on the farm.
Act 1 Turning Point: (J Major Conflict) Jim blows up at Molly and she commits suicide (perhaps only seeing Molly die at the crossing and then the funeral scene of people saying they are so sorry — suicide?)
Act 2:
Essence: (R Turning Point 1) Randi finds out she has Alzheimer’s
(M Turning Point 1) : Molly dies and something doesn’t seem right. Mindy and Mike investigate.
(R Midpoint, M Midpoint) Randi tells Mindy about her Alzheimer’s — makes her promise not to tell Mike or Cara and make Cara take over the farm or Mike’s brothers from Alaska will get it, not the twins as Mike (and his deceased dad) wants.
(C Turning Point 1): At Christmas, gets asked to be the executor/guardian of the twins’ estate if anything happens to Mike/Mindy.
(M Turning Point 2): Mindy talks Cara into it, but gets a premonition about her own death — Jim or Cara? Mindy uses her mind control to do this against Mike and Cara’s initial wishes
Act 2 Turning Point: (M Major Conflict): Mike wants to expose the evidence they have that Molly’s death may not have been a suicide and Mindy reluctantly agrees.
(M Ending) The NY’s Eve accident where Mike and Mindy’s car crashes into the train just as Molly had.
Act 3:
Essence: (C Midpoint) Cara gets a call that Mike and Mindy are dead and she has obligations to the family. Comes to the farm, believes she should take the kids back to LA and rent out the farmland. Goes to the funeral and meets Jim who she’s heard about for years. He is very charming.
Act 3 Turning Point: (R Turning Point 2) Randi realizes she has to make Cara stay or risk losing the twins’ legacy that she has promised to pass on to them.
Act 4:
Essence: (R Major Conflict) How can she get Cara to stay? Randi explains rental land to Cara and what it means to the farm; Cara’s boyfriend says he will not come to Iowa or do long distance; Kids don’t want to leave the farm;
(C Turning Point 2) Cara’s boyfriend breaks up with her — not willing to take on temporary kids/family.
(J Ending 1) Jim sees Mike and Molly’s death as a chance to get more land and tells his sons that’s what they must do — find a way to farm Mike and Molly’s land and eventually take over the rental land.
Act 4 Turning Point: (C Major Conflict) Randi convinces Cara that a huge part of the kids’ legacy will be gone if she doesn’t farm for them — Mike’s brothers will come down from Alaska.
Jim has promised that he will help Cara with all of the farming Randi is livid and explains about Molly’s accident/suicide;
Act 5:
Essence: (R Ending) Having convinced Cara to stay, Randi sees that Cara is thinking of Jim as a replacement for the boyfriend (and Mike) she just lost. Wonders if Cara will still come when she sees Jim get violent with his boys.
Hunter says he’s helped Mike’s dad and Mike with the equipment for years and can help Cara too; Randi guilts Cara after looking at her Alzheimer’s diagnosis; The Twins guilt Cara;
Act 5 Climax/Turning Point/Lock In: Cara does some mind control work and decides she must honor her commitment to Mindy/Mike and thinks about Jim as a replacement for her boyfriend.
( C Ending) Cara opts to stay, out of guilt that she may have caused Mike/Mindy’s accident with her own wish for Mike. Thinks Jim/Hunter will help her and then sees Jim’s violence
Act 5 Lock In: Hunter says he’ll help her and Jim is furious with Hunter; Gabe flinches; the twins shudder; Randi gasps; Cara is shocked;
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Jean’s Character Story Lines
What I learned doing this assignment is that taking the main characters through each step helped me make sure that the conflicts and turning points are present and move the plot along.
SHARRA LANE
<div>
Beginning: Sharra is looked
over for a promotion. Dash offers to look around for her. At home, she searches
for a new career with adventure. She reacts oddly to the Vault logo.
Curious, she has the interview with Lazarus but is convinced the job isn’t
for her, yet agrees to take the weekend to think about it.
</div><div>Turning Point: She
discovers her boss is embezzling money and makes a USB stick. Sharra takes
up Dash’s job offer out of state. She goes to return the Vault contract.Midpoint: Sharra is
mugged/stabbed in front of the Vault office building – a message to desist. A
Vault medic miraculously heals her. Sharra snoops into her file and finds
information on her family.Turning Point 2: Sharra
visits her parents’ gravesite looking for advice. She does the right but
stupid thing and confronts her boss – he knows she knows – about the
money, the stabbing. He threatens her. She quits.Major Conflict: Sharra gets
attacked again, courtesy of her boss. Faolan saves her, warns her to take
the out-of-state job. She tries to go home, but her place is being
watched.Ending: Sharra agrees
to go with Lazarus after he promises information about her parents’ death.
He arranges for ‘movers’ to collect her things. Holding Lazarus’s hand,
they both vanish and reappear in a future place that surprises Sharra.</div>
LAZARUS MAITLAND
<div>
Beginning: Lazarus deliberately
collides with Sharra, drops his pocket watch. Plants a seed about her future.
Tanner to watch from a distance.
</div><div>Turning Point: Lazarus interviews
Sharra. Tanner listens in, he’s not convinced she’s a good candidate.
Lazarus knows differently.Midpoint: Sharra is stabbed
and the contract is stolen. Lazarus links Tanner to bring Cam who heals
Sharra with medical equipment from the future. Lazarus sends Tanner back
in time to stop the mugging. Lazarus keeps Sharra overnight in his office.Turning Point 2: Lazarus
catches Sharra snooping on his computer. He tries to convince her to go
with him right then. She still
refuses.Major Conflict: Lazarus
reads the note his future-self had left for him. Tanner comes back empty-handed and at a dead-end about the mugger. They argue over Sharra’s suitability.
Sends Tanner to keep an eye on Sharra.Ending: Sharra shows up
at Lazarus’s office. He convinces her to join the agency. She agrees. He
shifts her to the Vault.</div>
TANNER HOLMES
<div>
Beginning: Tanner saves Ben
Franklin from death. Checks in with Lazarus. New assignment – Sharra Lane.
She drops her things, he helps pick them up, learns she’s dissatisfied
with her job. He gives her the Vault business card.
</div><div>Turning Point: Tanner
listens in on the interview. He tries to dissuade Lazarus from pursuing
Sharra as a recruit. Tanner leaves for the Vault.Midpoint: Tanner is
called back to Sharra’s timeline and to bring Cam – Sharra’s stabbed!
Lazarus sends Tanner to stop the mugging. Tanner shifts back right before
the mugging but is too late to stop it. He races after the mugger only to
find him getting into a taxi. He gets the license plate number.Turning Point 2: Tanner
gets to the mugger’s home, finds out someone else was there before him and
took the contract. Tanner beats the crap out of him for hurting a woman.Major Conflict: He goes back
to Lazarus with the news. They argue over her suitability. Lazarus sends a
begrudging Tanner to watch over Sharra. Watches her at the gravesite and
sees her loneliness.Ending: Tanner finishes
a fight with the goons sent by Sharra’s boss. He takes her to Lazarus to
keep her safe, still not convinced she’s Vault material. Lazarus gives him
the job to get her things. He watches them vanish.</div>
FAOLAN
<div>
Beginning: It’s London 1825.
Faolan is hurt. He sends his butler away and attends a stab wound in his
side. He pulls out a Vault uniform. He’s not happy.
</div><div>Turning Point: Faolan shifts
into the Vault, sneaks to the terminus and onto the computer. He gets Sharra
Lane’s recruitment information – place and date and leaves.Midpoint: He shifts into
Manhattan and jogs to the Vault office. He gets there to hear Sharra
screaming. He takes down the mugger. There’s a note on the mugger, someone
hired him. Faolan gets the mugger’s address from his license and takes off
in a taxi with the Vault contract.Turning Point 2: Faolan
breaks into the mugger’s house and hacks into his computer, getting the name
J.D. Dash. The mugger is there. Faolan shifts out.Major Conflict: Faolan is back,
drawn to Sharra. Catches her boss’s goons assaulting Sharra and comes to
the rescue. Takes them out. Warns Sharra away from the Vault Agency. Spots
Tanner and vanishes.Ending: Faolan is back in
London, for a dinner party. He changes out of his vault uniformTeaser:
Essence: Tanner saves a young Ben Franklin from certain death. Checks in with Lazarus. New assignment – Sharra Lane.
Turning Point: Tanner vanishes into thin air.
Act 1:
Essence: Sharra collides with Lazarus, he loses his pocket watch which Sharra finds. Sharra gets passed over for a promotion. She searches for a new career, something more adventurous. Dash offers to look around for her.
Turning Point: Sharra drops her things. Tanner helps her pick them up, learns she’s dissatisfied with her job. He gives her the Vault business card. She has an odd reaction to the logo. It’s weird. It makes her curious.
Act 2:
Essence: It’s London 1825. Faolan is hurt. He sends his butler away and attends a stab wound in his side. He pulls out a Vault uniform. He’s not happy. Sharra has an odd interview with Lazarus, isn’t convinced it’s for her, yet agrees to take the weekend to think about it. Tanner listens close by, later, he agrees – she’s not a good candidate for a recruit. Lazarus knows differently. Tanner leaves for the Vault. Faolan, a man from 1825, puts on a Vault uniform and vanishes to reappear at Vault headquarters to gather information on Sharra. Sharra discovers her boss is embezzling money and makes a USB copy.
Turning Point/Midpoint: Faolan shifts into the Vault, sneaks to the terminus and onto the computer. He gets Sharra Lane’s recruitment information – place and date and leaves. Sharra researches Vault Agency. Comes up with nothing. Dash meets Sharra. He’s found a position outside the state for her. She goes to return the Vault Agency contract. Sharra is mugged/stabbed in front of the Vault office building – a message to desist, her satchel with the contract gets stolen.
Act 3:
Essence: Faolan shifts into Manhattan and jogs to the Vault office. He gets there to hear Sharra screaming. He takes down the mugger. Sharra makes it to Lazarus’s office. Tanner is called back to Sharra’s timeline and to bring Cam – Sharra’s stabbed! There’s a note on the mugger, someone hired him. Faolan gets the mugger’s address from his license and takes off in a taxi with the Vault contract. Cam heals Sharra with medical equipment from the future. Lazarus sends Tanner back in time to stop the mugging. Lazarus keeps Sharra overnight in his office.
Turning Point: While alone, Sharra sneaks onto Lazarus’s computer, into her file. Lazarus comes in, stopping Sharra just as she discovers a section on her parents’ death. Embarrassed, she makes an excuse and leaves. Faolan breaks into the mugger’s house and hacks into his computer, geting the name J.D. Dash. The mugger is there. Faolan shifts out. Tanner gets to the mugger’s home, finds out someone else was there before him and took the contract. Tanner beats the crap out of him for hurting a woman.
Act 4:
Essence: Faolan, another rogue agent, secretly starts to investigate. Tanner shifts back right before the mugging but is too late to stop it. He races after the mugger only to find him getting into a taxi. It’s Faolan but Tanner can’t see. Tanner gets the license plate number.
.Lazarus reads the note his future-self had left for him. Tanner comes back empty-handed and at a dead-end about the mugger. They argue over Sharra’s suitability. Lazarus sends a begrudging Tanner to watch over Sharra. Tanner is there, sees her loneliness and loss. Sharra visits her parents’ gravesite looking for advice. She does the right but stupid thing and confronts her boss – he knows she knows – about the money, the stabbing. He threatens her. She quits.
Turning Point: Sharra gets attacked again, courtesy of her boss. Faolan is back, drawn to Sharra. Catches her boss’s goons assaulting Sharra and comes to the rescue. Takes them out. Warns Sharra away from the Vault Agency. Spots Tanner and vanishes. Tanner finishes the job.
Act 5:
Essence: She tries to go home with Tanner, but her place is being watched. Forced to flee or be killed, Sharra agrees to go with Tanner to Lazarus. Faolan is back in London. He changes out of his vault uniform into dress clothes for a dinner party he’s hosting. He has the satchel and a photo of a smiling Sharra.
Tanner and Sharra agree for the first time – still not convinced she’s Vault material. Lazarus offers a trial basis, she can go anywhere she wants after that. Lazarus gives Tanner the job of packing her things. Sharra gives him a key.
Lock-in: Running from an unknown assailant, Sharra vanishes with Lazarus and reappears in a future otherworldly place that surprises Sharra.
</div>
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Mod3, Lesson 4 – Character Story Lines
I learned that every exercise brings up more events as well more problems that need to be solved in the telling of this story.
Lane Baer’s Story Line
Beginning:
Baer begins depressed. He’s financially strapped, his wife Marta is aloof, and her insecurities affect them both, Paige is her usual precocious self, and the publisher’s deadline for his second novel is breathing down his neck. He’s written over a hundred pages but he’s not happy with them. He hears about a job teaching literature at a posh girl’s school.
Turning Point 1:
He interviews and gets hired at the Caroline Russell Brown School for Girls. The head mistress, Margaret Gilgood is a hellion on wheels. This is not going to be an easy gig, but it does provide him with a much-needed paycheck.
Midpoint:
His first day of school he meets Leylah Hafez, a senior in his lit class. She is beautiful and exotic, and she is immediately enamored with him.
Turning Point 2:
Baer is befriended by Christian Savage, the history teacher, who is suffering the loss of his baby girl to SIDS, and a divorce from his wife, Naomi. As an act of kindness, Baer invites him home for Sunday dinner.
Major Conflict:
Savage is murdered. All three Baers cross his path on the day he’s murdered leaving evidence that one of the three, or Margaret Gilgood could have killed him.
The World Has Changed:
He and Marta are considered persons of interest. Their eccentric little family life is crushed.
Marta Baer’s Story Line
Beginning:
Marta is insecure and depressed. She contrives a “game” to play with Lane manipulating him to telling her she’s beautiful and smart.
Turning Point 1:
While working at the bank she suffers a migraine which is common for her. She needs medication. She takes some time off to go to the drugstore. There she is sidetracked by the cosmetic sales lady who convinces she needs a make-over. She looks in the mirror. She’s stunned. No longer is she a plain jane. Now she’s a sexy, sultry woman. She’s tests out her new personality on a young man she comes across on the street. He finds her attractive and tells her so. She decides to go home before going back to the bank, so she first removes the make-up.
Midpoint:
At home in the master bedroom, she takes her medication and prepares to lie down for a short rest. Someone enters the house. Paige is at school and Lane is at his interview. She’s frightened. Finds Lane’s gun. Paige walks in home early from consultation day at school. Marta hides the gun in the bedcovers. Paige goes to her room and Marta lies down. Lane returns. Climbs in bed with Marta. He finds the gun.
Turning Point 2:
Savage comes for dinner. Marta appears in full make-up and in a sexy red dress. It is clear Savage is attracted to her and she to him. Paige, who adores her father and is protective of him, immediately fosters a deep hate for Savage.
Major Conflict:
Paige sneaks out to Savage’s apartment to demand he stays away from her mother as he doesn’t want his father to be hurt. When he doesn’t take her seriously, she goes home and reports that he raped her.
The World Has changed:
At the neighborhood bar, Baer tromps in accusing Savage of raping his daughter. Savage denies even touching her. Baer threatens Savage physically and a patron has to pull Baer off of Savage. Marta goes to Savage’s apartment to ask him if it is true he raped Paige. Savage denies the accusation. Marta threatens him with the gun that accidentally goes off. Savage is unscathed.
Paige’s Story Line
Beginning:
Paige sixteen-year-old is surly and precocious. She has a boy friend who she is considering having her first experience of sex with him. She is glad her father got the job at the school, although she considers the girls he will be teaching as “rich sluts.” She loves her mother but doesn’t respect her. Hates that her mother spends days in bed with headaches. She’s aggressive when dealing with her parents.
Turning Point 1:
She finds her mother in the master bathroom dying her hair. She assumes this must mean Savage, or “Potato Head” which she calls him must be coming to dinner again. Her hackles are up. She must do something to keep him away from her mother.
Midpoint:
She goes to Savage’s apartment to warn him to stay away from her mother.
Turning Point 2:
Paige accuses Savage of raping her.
Major Conflict:
Her parents are logically deeply disturbed by her accusation.
The World Has Changed:
Her parents ground her and never take their eyes off her.
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Tracy El Pueblo Character Story Lines
What I learned doing this assignment is that I have plenty of holes to fill in once characters reveal them! Need storylines to touch each other or dovetail end scenes, or mirror each other in opposite ways.
2. Create a beginning, middle, and end of the character’s story for the pilot (I have 5 characters).
Antonia
Beginning: Antonia sits stiffly in her grandmother’s parlor. Mr.
Lopez is being entertained/interrogated as a marriage prospect for
Antonia. <div>Turning Point: When Grandmother asks Antonia to pour Mr. Lopez
a drink, she instead walks out to the outdoor kitchen and screams.Midpoint: Grandmother berates Antonia for rejecting
this “young” suitor of age 40. She’s been wrong to give Antonia
choice, gotten spoiled. Antonia digs
in about an arranged marriage: won’t do it — wants choice and love.Turning Point 2: Antonia runs into her aunt’s house,
complaining about Grandmother. Encounters priest called to help her
suffering uncle.Major Conflict: Antonia sent unaccompanied to the native
village to fetch the shaman. Antonia’s uncle dies of mysterious illness.Ending: After the funeral, Grandmother tells Antonia since
she’s not interested in any suitor, she’s getting a reputation as an old
maid. She’ll live with her aunt to care for her children until the new
baby is born. Antonia refuses to grind corn — I can’t be nanny and maid,
too — hires woman from the native village. Sees soldier coming from her
grass hut, and goes into another where a woman stifles a scream.(Dilemma to be explored — a woman’s worth is judged by her
sexuality; must distance self from it to be taken seriously. Sexuality is
a weapon in a man’s arsenal that
doesn’t dent his authority)Lucas
Beginning: Lucas attends the trial of rebels/patriots in <st1:city w:st=”on”><st1:place w:st=”on”>Mexico City</st1:place></st1:city> as a law student</div><div>
Turning Point: In his university class, appropriates speech of
prosecutor to articulate his position as loyalist — against many of his
own caste since criollo started this.Midpoint: Lucas receives word that his father is ill.
Even after reading how he was injured, Lucas opts to stay in the city.
Gives off air of well-to-do to girl’s family he’s courtingTurning Point 2: With girl he likes at dance class, he receives
a poor critique of his style. Afterwards, Lucas is approached by soldiers
to join the military to fight insurgents, spy on friends who might be
insurgents against their own criollo class.Major Conflict: Lucas receives word that his father died by
suicide. He’s cut off from funds and must return home.Ending: At home, his father is denied funeral or burial since
committed major sin. Lucas informed he inherits nothing but must seek his
own fortune. He’s being sent to El Pueblo in the northern frontier to
childless uncle, the Mayor. Lucas sees this as a good thing to escape
conscription, and since family now ostracized by church, there is no opportunity to
advance.Father Diego
Beginning: Father Diego’s graduation from seminary (where
Father Serra trained) is celebrated
with his family in the city of <st1:city w:st=”on”><st1:place w:st=”on”>Queretaro</st1:place></st1:city>
— the birthplace of the revolution. </div><div>Turning Point: Not interested in serving in small family parish
or the Franciscans who head to missions in northern frontiers. Wants to
continue in social justice tradition of Father <st1:state w:st=”on”><st1:place w:st=”on”>Hidalgo</st1:place></st1:state>.
Liberate his own upper Criollo class and low caste Indians.Midpoint: Intends to travel to <st1:city w:st=”on”>Mexico
City</st1:city> to see imprisoned Josefa Ortiz, secret organizer of
revolution from <st1:place w:st=”on”><st1:country-region w:st=”on”>Spain</st1:country-region></st1:place>.
Saw her once while student when she
was held in convent locally. His father is very alarmed! Wants no conflict
with their trade in northern <st1:country-region w:st=”on”><st1:place w:st=”on”>Mexico</st1:place></st1:country-region>. Talks father into
travelling with him…or father talks Diego into coming home. Father meets
in secret with bishop to secure a safe future for Diego.Turning Point 2: At home in parish church, local priest hiding
Indian insurgents. Wants Diego’s help to enlist his father. Instead, his father trades them off (for thier “protection”)Major Conflict: Diego discovers his father is involved in
African slave trade into US and with Comanche — delicate balance keeping
Comanche from raiding their province and must give them Indian slaves at
least to keep them at bay. Moral conflict for Diego.Ending: Diego told he must leave home, but not to <st1:city w:st=”on” style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”><st1:place w:st=”on”>Mexico City</st1:place></st1:city>. Father
has arranged for escorted passage to <st1:state w:st=”on” style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”><st1:place w:st=”on”>California</st1:place></st1:state> province out of harm’s way.
His position as a secular priest is to pray for each family member each
day — the church receives the large bequest that he will administer as
long as goes away for awhile. Stay out of the war along the way! Scout out
good trading options with the west coast. Get a look at the fabled Spanish
galleons.Joseph
Beginning: Joseph walks happily along the wharf of ships, turning
in at a dry-docked ship in mid build. In <st1:place w:st=”on”><st1:state w:st=”on”>Connecticut</st1:state></st1:place>? Visits with younger
brother still under apprenticeship. Sees old master (good or bad?)
Parents? Poor? </div><div>Turning Point: Approached by merchant to sign up for new
whaling adventure in south Pacific as needs second carpenter onboard–
whale oil getting scarce in Atlantic. Need to try new area. Joseph turns
him down — merchants cut corners, not going away for two years. I’ve put
in more than my time, mate. Landlubber now.Midpoint: Joseph courts young lady at the finishing
school in <st1:place w:st=”on”><st1:city w:st=”on”>Boston</st1:city></st1:place>
(how long to travel there?) Set a date? How did they meet? Daughter of
master? Forbidden love?Turning Point 2: In pub with brother to celebrate what? Lots of
folks around. Asked again if will join crew of young captain, eager for
adventure.Major Conflict: Joseph awakes on deck of the whaling ship,
chained to the mast. Furious! Cheer up mate, he’s told. Will earn tatoos
for crossing the equator and going around the Horn, and finding lots of
native women or Argentinean women.Ending: Joseph turns away from the view of <st1:place w:st=”on”><st1:city w:st=”on”>Boston</st1:city></st1:place> in the rear, accepting his fate
— faces forward to the sea. He knows the eastern coastline and will jump
ship later to return.Thomas
Beginning: Thomas joins in the revelry in the streets of <st1:place w:st=”on”><st1:city w:st=”on”>Buenos Aires</st1:city>, <st1:country-region w:st=”on”>Argentina</st1:country-region></st1:place>, packed with
sailors. The first anniversary of <st1:city w:st=”on”><st1:place w:st=”on”>Independence</st1:place></st1:city>
is celebrated! The first Spanish country to break free, inspired by the <st1:place w:st=”on”><st1:country-region w:st=”on”>US</st1:country-region></st1:place>
revolutionary war and War of 1812 that many of these mercenaries fought
in. The anniversary to be marked by sailing two warships in opposite
directions to destroy Spanish targets. The captains introduced. Payment is
equal shares of booty. Huzzah! </div>Turning Point: Thomas in bar hears locals disparaging Bouchard
and treatment of sailors left in leaky ship after war in <st1:place w:st=”on” style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”><st1:country-region w:st=”on”>Peru</st1:country-region></st1:place>. They won’t sail with
him. (Share any Thomas’s story working with LaFitte to defeat British but
later spying on Mexican patriots while running supplies to Galveston for
Spanish made Thomas angry and left to support rebels in Argentina)?Midpoint: Thomas signs up with Captain Bouchard since
he heads to <st1:place w:st=”on” style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Africa</st1:place> and the Spanish spice
route. Doesn’t want to go around Horn. Mostly international crew – French,
British, American who fought each otherTurning Point 2: Thomas asks more about Bouchard? Unrest aboard
the ship among the crew as multiple delays in getting going. The financier
of the ship wants to come along. The captains two brother-in-law come
aboard — bossy without knowing anything.Major Conflict: A huge fight breaks out before they have even
left. Some barricade themselves in quarters. Marines called in. One sailor
tries to knife Bouchard and is shot. Thomas stays out of the melee and is
rewarded — not assigned to rigging?Ending: Thomas considers jumping into the harbor to swim back
to shore. Ship weighs anchor, heading east to <st1:place w:st=”on” style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Africa</st1:place>.
(Timeline issue: Depart July 9, 1817 – winter – a year to day of
independence, and a year preparing for voyage — so maybe need to see
Thomas getting to Argentina first? left Lafitte earlier in year but would
that be good sailing time? Or in 1816?).<div>
</div>
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Jack’s Character Story Lines
What I learned from this assignment is that by following the outline for character storylines, I thought of new plot points
Character Story Lines for CONCEIVED
VICTORIA
Beginning: Where does the character start? – She lands her
jet, thinks she’s in charge
Turning
Point: A twist that locks them
into a conflict. – Finds out that she has been raising Kayla’s son in England as a royal-blooded sonMidpoint: A twist that causes everything to change. Her fund is
hackedTurning
Point 2: Another twist that takes them
to the biggest conflict. Her eggs are switched
Dilemma: The character is faced with two equally unacceptable
choices. They lose either way. – If she pays the ransom by furnishing the
queen’s skin she risks everythingMajor
Conflict: The ultimate experience of this
conflict: She must save the queen’s money but must conspire to clone the queen in
order to do thatEnding: Their world has changed. Victoria is now taking major risks,
something she hatesKAYLA
Beginning – She is infatuated with Victoria and is a member of the child-free movement
Turning Point – She decides to freeze her eggs for future fertilization
Midpoint – She is disrespected, decides to switch eggs with Victoria’s
Turning Point 2 – Sugarcane king’s Haitian wife places voodoo curse on her
Dilemma – Get Micheline to release curse by bending to the will of the sugarcane king
Ending – Ironically, she won’t raise her own child, exactly what her internal wound is regarding her absent father
CHARLES
Beginning – Co-pilot and Bodyguard
Turning Point – Betrays Victoria
Midpoint – Makes Deal with Chinese communists
Turning Point 2 – Asks for his own bitcoin ransom demand in addition to the communists’ demands
Dilemma – Must protect Victoria against communists so she can fulfill his demand
Ending – He conspired to clone the queen
PROFESSOR MATTHEWS
Beginning – World renown gene editing specialist and excommunicated Druid
Turning Point – Hatches a plan when Victoria agrees to freeze her eggs
Midpoint – He steals the wrong eggs, not knowing they’ve been switched
Turning Point 2 – Daughter Bryony refuses to abort female child
Dilemma – He knows his experiments fail, yet he promotes them
Ending – Learns to love his granddaughter, Dana the Celtic princess.
SANTIAGO
Beginning – Wants to sell Hitler’s genes
Turning Point – Obtains Victoria’s eggs (But actually Kayla’s)
Midpoint – decides to gene-enhance the embryo
Turning Point 2 – Finds out he’s been selling quarter-black babies to neo nazis
Dilemma – Tell the truth or not
Ending – Falls for Kayla
.
JEREMY
Beginning – Kayla’s secretary, a goof-off video game player
Turning Point – Meets Windy Moon, whom he falls for
Midpoint – Meets Jimmy Gregory’s daughter, an AI person who says she can help Jeremy’s with his gaming
Turning Point 2 – Jeremy learns the truth of Kayla’s betrayal
Dilemma – tell Windy Moon truth and lose Kayla and job?
End – becomes a serious person instead of a goof off
– becomes AI expert
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R. Reid Jr.’s character Story lines
*Bruce
Bruce is being forced to take a trip to get something for his boss far away that was stolen. His wrist is already in digital cuffs and he is told if he doesn’t retrieve the items his ‘home world’ will be killed. He goes unconscious from a smack or two.
Bruce wakes up and adjusts his wrists. Was it a dream? He fixs his collar and goes into the president of the bank and tells him he representing 3 of his clients with safety deposit boxes. He is waved away until he says one of the names. Minutes later he is representing the bank to find out what happened.
Turns out the Agents are looking into the bank robbers who lost their memories suddenly after being caught. Bruce as an insurance adjuster can do that.
Bruce has a device that helps him trace a purple mist that leads him to a bar where he talks briefly to Snowy who is the latest victim like the bank robbers. She leaves the bar with a friend who says she had a bad night.
Bruce cannot connect with people, so he enrolls in a course and in his class is the same girl who spoke briefly at in the bar only she has no clue of being there.
Bruce blends into the Agents’ investigation and sees a face on a active case to find out Snowy was a victim the day after he saw her. And after attacking a man in the park she couldn’t recall what or who she was. And was let go.
Bruce turns around in the same crowded bar with Snowy and the their study group a quiet visitor sits in Snowy’s seat for a few minutes while everyone is in the washroom or getting drinks. She ask Bruce if he knows her. Bruce thinks it’s a joke but says no, thank you and that he is not looking. She gets up. And after everyone sits down Bruce gets a flash gets up and realizes that he does know her from somewhere. He looks around the bar quickly and outside but she is gone. The Bar back give Bruce a note from the girl.
Bruce checks in with the Agents and overhears and outside call from the male lead of the investigation. And he says he will do whatever it takes to find the person behind this and will sacrifice a partner like he did last time to get that promotion.
Bruce decides to work through or with Snowy only he hasn’t told her who he is.Snowy
Snowy is picked out by a woman who emits a purple mist over Snowy and is given a suggestion that she knows Fung Fu. She believes it and lays out two guys who were approaching her too forcefully in a bar.
Snowy follows the woman and next we see her waking up in her own place, kind of like she is hung over.
Snowy goes to the park hooded up and approaches a guy in the park. The mysterious woman is talking into a box in her wrist and Snowy is hearing it.
Snowy attacks the man with a device in her bag and he man goes limp. Someone in the park gets on their phone and reports it, the Agents hear of this attack and check it out before the police can get there.
Meanwhile, Snowy has dropped off the device in the trash and the mysterious woman picks it up and goes off.
Snowy is walking away when the Agents spot her. She dashes and the female agent gives chases first and after Snowy is cornered she starts to fight back until she goes limp for a second. And kind of wakes up not knowing anything that happens.
The Agents get her to take a test and there is nothing in her system that is chemical.
Snowy is let go and she goes to classes. She is in class and the prof asks everyone to form a group of 5 for their lab. Bruce turns to see Snowy is in his class next to him, but she doesn’t recall seeing him. They join three others for their group.Beginning: Snowy goes into bar after fight with boy.
Turning Point: Woman listens to story but induces her with purple mist. Woman takes Snowy out of bar.
Midpoint: Snowy wakes up under some inducement and paralysis a man who was smuggling women.
Turning Point 2: She is freaked out by this and slowly opens up to those she will trust and Bruce puts him in the position to be that person.
Major Conflict: Snowy doesn’t know if she can trust anyone but thinks her drink was majorly spiked.
Ending: Snowy is trust her classmates, especially Bruce but the Mysterious woman is still showing herself to Bruce as a person of interest.Beginning: Bruce has the nightmare of nightmares but goes about finding an ‘in’ with the bank President with 3 dead box holders of his bank. He asks there estates to represent their boxes. He finds a way to speak to the Bank President and raises a fuss that he will make public if the bank president doesn’t let him represent the bank and get to bottom of who robbed his bank.
Turning Point: working with the agents he has to steer them away from finding clues.
Midpoint: bumping into Snowy as she leaves the bar and ends up showing up in her class and they become lab mates.
Turning Point 2: The Mysterious woman pops suddenly out of nowhere in to ask a strange question to Bruce, if he remembers her. He says no only to chase after her a minute later but she is gone like the wind!
Major Conflict: The nightmares Bruce is having, can they be real ? And the people and places are just fuzzy for now? Could this Mysterious woman be part of that?
Ending: Bruce decides to keep the Agents at bay after hearing their leader over the phone he will do sacrifice who ever needs to killed to get the job done. Bruce decides to gain the trust of Snowy and get to the bottom of her Blacked-out moments when she committed a crime and has no memory of it while he deals with his nightmares of people and places he doesn’t know.Act 1:
Essence: Bruce is on the hunt for something. And his intel leads him to a number of people and a bank. Snowy is a college student who is tricked with a device Bruce is able to track but never finds who is yielding it behind the scenes to control people.
Turning Point: Then the bank gets robbed Bruce puts in motion to represent dead safe box holders and rattles the Bank’s president to go public unless he can be allowed to present his client’s interests. The Bank president asks him to instead represent the bank and introduces him to the Agents in charge.
Act 2:
Essence: Snowy is approached by a woman while in a state of grief who emits a purple mist while talking into Snowy’s ear. While in the bar she has some men aggressively hitting on her. This woman tells a command to a bracelet that now is heard in Snowy’s ear that she knows Kung fu. She takes the guys out and amazes those in the bar and gets applause by the women in the bar. Bruce bumps into Snowy at the bar but the Mysterious woman tells Snowy that it is time to go and sleep for tomorrow’s big job and she leaves.
Turning point:The next day Snowy wakes up and takes a device out of her pocket at a park and uses it to shock a man and puts the device near a bin that is picked up by the mysterious woman.
Midpoint The agents scan a report of an unusual attack in a park and think it might be something. They see a woman (Snowy) walking strange like she is getting off of a drug. They run after her when she runs. She is cornered and starts to fight back and is beating one of the Agents who runs ahead but quickly shuts off as the female agent comes on the scene a few seconds later and can’t recall who she is or what is happening. Her weapon used is now in the hands of the Mysterious woman who left earlier.
Act 3:
Essence: Bruce must make an in road with the banks to get access to those also looking for answers who might stumble on the TECH.
Turning point: An insurance agent looks down at his bracket and realizes he is missing a class as he talks to the bank president about being robbed but will help him get to bottom of what happened to prevent it. Hie is hired to find out what happened on behalf of the bank.
Essence: Turning Point/Midpoint: <b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>The insurance agent is the only one who believes the people were “induced” with something and is only looking for that substance that induce them. The Agents are working with the insurance agent to get full cooperation of the bank.
Act 4: The insurance agent is talking with the agents over coffees and they try to compare what happened at the bar to the girl they caught in morning but had to let her go. The agents sees it as a dead end and cuts the meeting short cause of his next appointment is starting in thirty minutes. He leaves and enters a campus, he goes into a bathroom and changes out of tie and puts on a casual shirt instead of the formal one he has. He finally shows up at class. He checks in with the prof for the class and takes a seat in the class. After the class the prof asks people to turn to the people around them and form a study group with three others.
Essence: Turning Point: <b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Turning around the insurance agents sees the girl from the bar. The audience sees the flash back to THE AGENTS stopping the same girl. The insurance agent only knows her from the Bar the night before. She introduces herself and so do the other people. But she has no clue they met briefly the night before. And the insurance guy has no idea The Agents detained her briefly.
Act 5: We have a brief flashback to one of the two Agents, the female agent while the insurance agent is using his bracelet outside the office to hear the Male agent talking. The female agent watching the cream in a cup day dreams and is reliving how she got to not trusting men after getting pushed around by another guy in a relationship /working colleague in a relationship. She got out of it and the agent was asking her to do something shady that ended up with him arrested and her with some bruising on her face. The other agent in present day is talking to a boss on the phone and says, he doesn’t care who he has to go through that includes coworkers to make the arrests. The boss agrees with him to do whatever it takes and step over whoever her has to to get that arrest and further his career in their bureau.
Essence: Lock In: Bruce, the main character is on his way home and an old man stops him and asks him if he has made a decision. Bruce remembers back as he is going to group time with the group and sees Snowy’s smile as she flicks a paper at him vs. seeing the arrest style of the two agents and coffees with The Agents, essentially the female agent Rebecca who is he is comparing memories with. Bruce seems to make the decision to work more with the girl in the class than the female agent, thought in another flashback she is slowly respecting him for his work ethic and he doesn’t notice her checking him out. Even the other agent points it out while she is in the bathroom and he brush it off and says he is only professional. While at school with the other older students he is more himself. The old man says, it sounds like the decision is made. Yeah, for now, Bruce responds. The old man says, who is your memory? Bruce, still foggy. It is like I can’t remember anything except this job. The old man continues, do you really think this girl is going to help you find what you boss asked you to find? Better than working with an agency that only wants to get ahead (he pictures the guy agent talking to his boss) or bust some heads (he thinks of Rebecca who is tough as nails). I did meet this one woman Bruce remembers, he recollects at the put when Snowy, the girl from class went to the bathroom a mysterious woman sits briefly in Snow’s seat. Bruce is a little shocked and says, do we know each other? The mysterious woman, I thought you would remember me. Bruce, would I from…? The mysterious woman looks up and sees Snowy coming back. If you remember come and find me. She passes Snowy who looks at her like she knows her. She sits down. Who was that, the rest of the group comes back ready to tackle a bit more work. Suddenly Bruce does get a flash back. Are you okay? Bruce does remember this lady and they are talking about something technical and she brushes his arm as he asks her to pay attention. Bruce notices she left a handkerchief and says, wait a minute and gets up and picks it up to return it and goes to the door as he looks around and she is not outside or walking.
Bruce in present time is talking to the old man again and says, I think I have made my choice. And while he is talking he walks back to the group and puts the handkerchief on his head and says what and all four of them laugh and he sits. Bruce, now where were we?….
Copyright 2018 – 2021, Hal Croasmun, All rights reserved
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Rob’s Character Story Lines
What I learned doing this assignment is the value of isolating each character’s storyline in creating the overall outline.
Character: David / The Mirage
David begins as an isolated loner who quietly lives by his own rules and flies under the radar. After rescuing Julia from a demon attack he is reluctantly drawn into conflict with the demons and forced to flee his home after they discover where he lives.
Beginning: An isolated loner with supernatural powers who lives in secret among humans, quietly living by his own rules and flying under the radar.
Turning Point: When Julia is attacked by a demon he reveals himself to her to save her life.
Midpoint: The Mirage discovers that Julia has pictures of him and the demons that he never knew about. (“Nobody can see them except me .. other than those who are about to die.”) He interrogates her but she doesn’t know anything about him.
Turning Point 2: After the Mirage abandons Julia, she tracks him down and brings the demons to his doorstep
Major Conflict: The Mirage fights a bunch of demons who succeed in kidnapping his sole friend and confidante, Madeleine.
Ending: The Mirage, once a determined loner, reluctantly teams up with Julia to rescue Madeleine and defeat the demons.
Dilemma (optional): Get involved in Julia’s problem or leave her to it.
Character: Julia
Julia begins as an ambitious career archaeologist. After an attempt on her life by a terrifying demon her focus turns to survival and understanding her assailants. She tracks down the Mirage in an attempt to enlist his protection.
Beginning: Julia is an ambitious archaeologist with her career on the line after a failed archaeological dig
Turning Point: She is attacked by a demon
Midpoint: Julia asks the Mirage for his help but he refuses, telling her the attack was random
Turning Point 2: The demons attack again, this time at the Mirage’s own house.
Major Conflict: Julia and the Mirage fight the demons but fail to prevent them kidnapping Madeleine
Ending: Julia, once focussed solely on her career, teams up with the Mirage to fight demons and rescue Madeleine.
Dilemma (optional):
1. First draft of “The Mirage” Pilot Outline.
Teaser:
Essence: A bunch of studs assault a young woman.
Turning Point: The “woman” is a demon who kills them all.
Act 1:
Julia is an archaeologist whose career is on the line after a failed archaeological dig. Her boss, Vincent Chamberlain, is furious. A mysterious figure known as “The Mirage” has the attention of the press and the police. Julia is being stalked by a wicked-looking stranger.
Turning Point: The stalker is a demon! The Mirage rescues her then flees.
Act 2:
The Mirage returns home where he lives with Madeleine and reveals his encounter with the demon and Julia. He is an isolated loner with supernatural powers who lives in secret among humans, quietly living by his own rules and flying under the radar. He has taken a risk to reveal himself to Julia to save her life.
Julia returns home. The Mirage secretly watches her, invisible. Julia reveals that she has pictures of the demons and the Mirage in various forms of battle. The Mirage reveals himself again and confronts her: “Nobody can see them except me .. other than those who are about to die.” He interrogates her but she says she doesn’t know anything about him.
Julia asks him to tell her more about himself but he refuses and says the attacks are random, then abandons her.
Detective White investigates the teenagers’ death.
Act 3:
The Mirage returns to the scene of the attack on Julia to collect the demon’s “essence” from the scene, and experiments with it in his underground lair. He fails in whatever mysterious experiment he is performing. We find him on the moon, reflecting on the situation.
Turning Point: There is a pile of corpses on the dark side of the moon.
Act 4:
Detective White interrogates two hardened criminals who have been captured by the Mirage after abducting a child. They are terrified of the Mirage. When he touched them they felt terror that chilled them to the bone and generated deep remorse. We see the Mirage’s spectacular rescue of the little girl from them in fleeting flashbacks. White is skeptical about the crooks story but intrigued.
We can see the Mirage in the room with them, invisible, watching the criminals interaction with White – the setup for their ongoing conflict.
Turning Point: Julia tracks down the Mirage and unwittingly leads the demons to his doorstep.
Act 5:
Julia unwittingly leads the demons to the Mirage’s doorstep and they fight. The Mirage discovers that his voice has the power to hurt the demons. He fights them off but they succeed in kidnapping his sole friend and confidante, Madeleine.
Lock In: Madeleine is kidnapped and the demons force the Mirage to flee from his home. The Mirage, once a determined loner, reluctantly teams up with Julia to rescue Madeleine and defeat the demons.
Cliffhanger: The demons stalk Vincent Chamberlain then reveal … Vincent is leading the demons!
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Mod. 3 lesson 4
What I learnt from this assignment is that within the pilot there must be an arc for the characters, we must see a change within them.
Beginning:
10 year old Joe is frightened by his parents fighting, scared his dad is going to lose another job and go back to jail again. <div>Abbey begs Father Thomas (her captor) to let her go back home. She is trapped and desperate.
<div>
Turning Point:
She finds tools and tries to hot wire the car.His dad disappears and Joe is told that he has a good job but Joe is doubting it. His grandmother also doubting it.
Midpoint:
Joe’s father turns up, suddenly wealthy and they move to a new house – beyond anything Joe could dream of, but he feels something is not right in the house.
Someone or something sinister is banging at the door. It is relentless, trying to get into the house.Abbey is afraid for her life.
Turning Point 2:
Joe doesn’t trust the people Michael works for, the neighbours, the housekeeper. He sees his brother is starting to pull away from him also. But he has found one friend who is not allowed to play with anyone. He decides to pursue the friendship anyway.
Abbey decides to escape on foot.Major Conflict:
Joe wants to go back and live with his grandmother but his family won’t allow it.Abbey wants to go back to her family but they don’t want her. They won’t even return her calls, even when she is being threatened. </div>
Ending:
The father destroys Joe’s grandmother’s phone number so he can’t call her.
Abbey leaves the property but is stopped by a scary figure holding an axe.
(Dilemma is optional.)</div>
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