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Day 4 Assignments
Reply to post your assignments.
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18 Replies
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What I learned: Ever time we inspect who we think these characters are, something evolves. Something we never realized before. Some facet jumps out at us, and they are transformed, or perhaps we are. Some characteristic of a friend, an enemy, a sibling, threads its way into our intellect of who these charcters are. It nudges us into a new direction. That’s what this lesson does. Thanks
LOGLINE: A magical dragon’s penchant for stealing, results in a prison sentence for his only friend, forcing them to go on the lam to outer space.
For the Love of Percy
A buddy screenplay.
Character profile:
Percy the Dragon: One of the screenplay’s protags; the other is his buddy, Dusty.
Character Traits: Impulsive, undercover, invisible; evasive, secretive
Character subtext: A long-nosed, yellow-fanged, fire breathing, thieving, Robin Hood type, dragon.
Flaw: Inability to comprehend the laws of man.
Need: To belong/ be believable, which stems from trying to fit in a human world.
Want: To protect/save his friend Dusty– his only friend in the world.
Character Arc: Percy arcs from a dragon, deserted on earth, to king of the Planet Freome with Dusty.
Fear: Fear of losing his only friend and never have a life on earth.
Agenda: Escape Earth. Find a good- looking female, (one with swagger,) and include Dusty as family.
Secret: He loves Princess Zenith, from Planet Freome, not knowing she is his sister.
What he doesn’t want to admit to himself: He may never be able to fill his agenda and end up alone.
Trait for improving script: Crafty. One given to deceptive plotting instead of clueless plotting.
Dusty Greene- An overweight, 9 y/o, vulnerable, foster kid with red hair, freckles, and Coca Cola glasses. A buddy protagonist with Percy.
Character Traits: Insecure, bullied, isolated, invisible.
Character Subtext: Clueless; invisible/the Little John in Robin Hood—never quite sure of himself.
Flaw: No confidence.
Need: to know who he is.
Want: To be accepted
Character Arc: From a kid who doesn’t know who he is, to a royal subject on another planet.
Fear: To never fit; to not ever find true love.
**Agenda: Be a brave knight in shining armor with Percy, instead of a coward against his three bullies.
Secret: No one knows he knows a dragon, and he’s his best friend.
What he doesn’t want to admit to himself? That his life may never change.
Trait for improving script: Bravery– something needed for his self concept.
Nurse Phoebe:
Royal Aunt to slain king and queen; Nursemaid to their infant twins, Prince Percy and Princess Zenith.
Character Traits: Dedicated, loyal, intelligent, magical,
Character subtext: A Maid Marion. Do-gooder, supporter to her murdered brother, and his queen.
Flaw: She masks her emotions, but lives in constant fear after the takeover.
Need: Obsessed with protecting the prince and princess– even at the risk of her own life.
Want: to survive
Character arc: The nurse who protects the infants, becomes the matriarch of the family,
Fear: For her life.
Agenda: To ensure the twins survive the takeover and continue her family’s lineage.
Secret: Always on the lookout for escape.
What she doesn’t want to admit to herself: That she is living on hope, knowing the wicked queen wants her dead. What will happen to the prince and princess if this happens?
Trait for improving script? sensual, attracting the dragon king to her plight.
Princess Zenith:
Dragon princess, daughter to slain king and queen. Twin to Percy. Kidnapped by invading king.
Character traits: Confident, spoiled, demanding
Character subtext: A Rapunzel princess, who lets down her hair, whenever she can get away with it.
Flaw: Lives in a fairy tale where princesses marry for love and not political implications.
Need: To make her own choices without the king’s interference. To grow up.
Wants: Percy
Fear: That she will not be able to marry for love, but for the good of the kingdom.
Agenda: To find a way to find Percy.
Secret: She dreams of escaping and tracking down Percy, her true love.
What she doesn’t want to admit to herself: That she may have lost Percy forever.
Traits for improving script: A suspicious nature that makes her question her kidnappers.
TOBY MILLS, 39, An old Army buddy of Dusty’s. He comes to the funeral and cabin.
Character Traits: A party animal, womanizer, and salesmen.
Character Subtext: Toby is Dusty’s old Army buddy– a Fonzie party animal.
Flaw: An old Fonzie party animal.
Need: To be young.
Wants: A good time.
Fear: He’s losing his looks.
Agenda: Eat, drink and be merry.
Secret: He’s homeless; his women pay for his ride.
What does he not want to admit to himself? That he has made a mess of his life and he hangs onto friends like Dusty, cause that’s all he has left.
Traits for improving script? The sly trait. After he says good by to Dusty for the last time, Dusty’s, heirloom, dragon pendant that’s his father left him, is missing. Toby is a thief…
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- HI – Notes in Bold Bullet Italic, and I emailed them.
LOGLINE: A magical dragon’s penchant for stealing, results in a prison sentence for his only friend, forcing them to go on the lam to outer space.
For the Love of Percy
A buddy screenplay.
Character profile:
Percy the Dragon: One of the screenplay’s protags; the other is his buddy, Dusty.
Character Traits: Impulsive, undercover, invisible; evasive, secretive
Character subtext: A long-nosed, yellow-fanged, fire breathing, thieving, Robin Hood type, dragon.
Flaw: Inability to comprehend the laws of man.
Need: To belong/ be believable, which stems from trying to fit in a human world.
Want: To protect/save his friend Dusty– his only friend in the world.
Character Arc: Percy arcs from a dragon, deserted on earth, to king of the Planet Freome with Dusty.
Fear: Fear of losing his only friend and never have a life on earth.
- In his agenda you list “escape earth” but it looks like he wants to have a life on earth?
Agenda: Escape Earth. Find a good- looking female, (one with swagger,) and include Dusty as family.
Secret: He loves Princess Zenith, from Planet Freome, not knowing she is his sister.
What he doesn’t want to admit to himself: He may never be able to fill his agenda and end up alone.
Trait for improving script: Crafty. One given to deceptive plotting instead of clueless plotting.
Yes! Perfect – make it crafty.
Dusty Greene- An overweight, 9 y/o, vulnerable, foster kid with red hair, freckles, and Coca Cola glasses. A buddy protagonist with Percy.
Character Traits: Insecure, bullied, isolated, invisible.
Character Subtext: Clueless; invisible/the Little John in Robin Hood—never quite sure of himself.
Flaw: No confidence.
- Need: to know who he is. *to gain confidence and a sense of self?
- Yes! This all looks good.
Want: To be accepted
Character Arc: From a kid who doesn’t know who he is, to a royal subject on another planet.
Fear: To never fit; to not ever find true love.
**Agenda: Be a brave knight in shining armor with Percy, instead of a coward against his three bullies.
Secret: No one knows he knows a dragon, and he’s his best friend.
What he doesn’t want to admit to himself? That his life may never change.
Trait for improving script: Bravery– something needed for his self concept.
Nurse Phoebe:
Royal Aunt to slain king and queen; Nursemaid to their infant twins, Prince Percy and Princess Zenith.
Character Traits: Dedicated, loyal, intelligent, magical,
Character subtext: A Maid Marion. Do-gooder, supporter to her murdered brother, and his queen.
Flaw: She masks her emotions, but lives in constant fear after the takeover.
- Maybe her flaw needs to be more about her character – example: She lacks courage to stand up and be heard
Need: Obsessed with protecting the prince and princess– even at the risk of her own life.
Want: to survive
- Don’t we all? Is there a deeper want you can come up with?
Character arc: The nurse who protects the infants, becomes the matriarch of the family,
Fear: For her life.
- That ‘she isn’t strong enough to survive’?
Agenda: To ensure the twins survive the takeover and continue her family’s lineage.
Secret: Always on the lookout for escape.
What she doesn’t want to admit to herself: That she is living on hope, knowing the wicked queen wants her dead. What will happen to the prince and princess if this happens?
Trait for improving script? sensual, attracting the dragon king to her plight.
- Hmmmm. Not sure… maybe her secret is that she actually loves him? Or that she deceives him into thinking so? Then you may have basic for this.
Princess Zenith:
Dragon princess, daughter to slain king and queen. Twin to Percy. Kidnapped by invading king.
Character traits: Confident, spoiled, demanding
Character subtext: A Rapunzel princess, who lets down her hair, whenever she can get away with it.
Flaw: Lives in a fairy tale where princesses marry for love and not political implications.
Need: To make her own choices without the king’s interference. To grow up.
Wants: Percy
Fear: That she will not be able to marry for love, but for the good of the kingdom.
Agenda: To find a way to find Percy.
Secret: She dreams of escaping and tracking down Percy, her true love.
What she doesn’t want to admit to herself: That she may have lost Percy forever.
Traits for improving script: A suspicious nature that makes her question her kidnappers.
- Not sure the princess being in love with her brother flies. Have you considered that she remembers and adores her older brother and will do anything to find him?
TOBY MILLS, 39, An old Army buddy of Dusty’s. He comes to the funeral and cabin.
Character Traits: A party animal, womanizer, and salesmen.
Character Subtext: Toby is Dusty’s old Army buddy– a Fonzie party animal.
Flaw: An old Fonzie party animal.
Need: To be young.
- To be ‘thought of as one of the young crowd”?
Wants: A good time.
Fear: He’s losing his looks.
Agenda: Eat, drink and be merry.
Secret: He’s homeless; his women pay for his ride.
What does he not want to admit to himself? That he has made a mess of his life and he hangs onto friends like Dusty, cause that’s all he has left.
Traits for improving script? The sly trait. After he says good by to Dusty for the last time, Dusty’s, heirloom, dragon pendant that’s his father left him, is missing. Toby is a thief
- Therefore not really a friend, so you can play on that to add conflict to the script.
- HI – Notes in Bold Bullet Italic, and I emailed them.
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What I learned from doing this assignment is that I should make my main protagonists more relatable so that their actions are more understandable even if the audience doesn’t condone them, and I should make the antagonist an even worst person so they can root against him
Logline: When a police detective learns that his psychopathic wife has had a relapse, he must do whatever he can to keep her safe as a private investigator closes in on closing the case.
3 main characters:
1) CONNOR MURPHY: Police detective who covers up a murder to keep his recovering psychopathic wife out of jail.
Traits: Loyal, resourceful, patient, indulgent
Subtext: He doesn’t believe in the law. Not anymore.
Want: To stop the arrest of his wife
Need: To protect his loved ones
Flaw: He lacks empathy for people he doesn’t love
Character arc: From admirable law enforcer to criminal
Fear: That he will wind up alone
Wound: His mother had a mental disorder and she was taken away from him as a child.
IMPROVED TRAIT: Indulgent
If I make Connor more indulgent in other things (i.e. what he eats and drinks) then it might make an easier transition for him to indulgent in the life of crime
2) MALLORY MURPHY: A school teacher and recovering psychopath who falls off the wagon
Traits: kind, hospitable, insecure, psychopathic
Subtext: She doesn’t get mad, she gets even.
Want: To stay with her husband Connor
Need: To see justice in the world
Flaw: She tends to be resentful
Character arc: From happy housewife to natural born killer
Fear: That she’ll be forever misunderstood
Wound: A prank gone horribly wrong she committed as a teen hurt someone she wasn’t trying to hurt
IMPROVED TRAIT: Insecure. This way she is vulnerable enough that she would want to lash out and see “justice” carried out as she sees it. Plus she would need her husband’s protection more.
3) WESTON TRENT: Private investigator hired to solve a murder and suspects it might be linked to murders in the past
Traits: driven, suspicious, curious, unorthodox
Subtext: He’s willing to cross the line to achieve an objective
Want: To solve the murder he’s been hired to solve
Need: To execute justice, even if it means taking it into his own hands
Flaw: He jumps to conclusions
Character arc: From respectable private eye to vigilante
Fear: That his self-started business will fail
Wound: unknown (originally I had his own brother be one of Mallory’s past victims but I think that generates too much sympathy for his character)
IMPROVED TRAIT: Suspicious. Having Weston be less even keel would alienate him from other law enforcers and put him in more of a position where he needs to go rogue.
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ASSIGNMENT 4 CHARACTER PROFILES
What I learned from discovering my characters is how it fires up my creativity to discover and apply traits that make my characters have motive based subtext in every line.
LOGLINE:
Based on real events this gritty account follows fighter pilots in Vietnam battling bureaucracy, flawed weapons, a deadly enemy and inner demons that just might be the worst of all.
Character name: Connelly
Role: Fledgling Fighter Pilot
Core Character Traits:
Swaggering
Hubris
Impetuous
Bitter
Sexy
Character Subtext Logline: Connally is a young, gifted albeit self destructive pilot.
His Mission: To get his wings back.
Want: To show that he is better than everyone.
Character Arc: By the end of the script his need to prove himself is replaced by the desire survive and win back Maggie’s love.
Character Name: Maggie
Role: Intelligence Officer
Character Traits:
Buttoned down
Bright
Impish
Adventurous
Sensual
Character Subtext Logline: Beneath Maggie’s austere surface is a wild child who is attracted to bad boys like Connally.
Her Mission: To prove the Combat Tree system works in combat.
Want: Show that she’s better than the good old boys and be with Connally.
Character Arc: The insecure newbie blossoms into a strong, confident woman who isn’t afraid to disobey orders to save the man she loves.
Character Name: Prof.
Role: Wing commander 432nd Fighter Wing.
Character Traits:
Staunch
Genius
Mentor
Fatalistic
Disillusioned
Character Subtext Logline: Prof is a once an unquestioning patriot who is now doubting the legitimacy of the war.
Mission: To train pilots how to shoot down the enemy.
Want: To save the lives of his pilots and go home to his family.
Character Arc: By the end he is caught between loyalty to his country and the realization that Greed, not God is on not our side.
Character Name: Mad
Role: Wild Weasel Pilot.
Character Traits:
Gallant
Kind
Tough as Nails
Gruff
Obstinate
Character Subtext Logline: Mad is an unflappable tough guy who is damn sure of himself and his purpose.
Mission: Wild Weasel Pilot. The most dangerous mission in the air. Take out Missile sites while they’re shooting at you.
Want: To win the war.
Character Name: Strawman.
Role: Mad’s Backseater.
Character Traits:
Stalwart
Easygoing
Goofy
Socially awkward
Resentful
Character Subtext Logline: Strawman, the runt of the litter, tries to use hummer to fit and can’t understand why no one takes him seriously.
Mission: Wild Weasel Weapons System Operator.
Want: To be respected by the guys, not realizing he already is.
Improved Character: Maggie.
Before she was a straight laced officer who against all logic falls for Connelly. Now she has a wild side that is attracted to guys like him.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Greg Kanaga.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Greg Kanaga.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by
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Judith’s Character Profiles – Lesson/Assignment 4 –
What I learned is really looking at each character and their role in the story made me select traits that serve the character and the story.
Logline: When an estranged sister arrives pretending wanting to make up, her unsuspecting sibling welcomes her with open arms only to discover her sister has evil intentions.
Character One: Rachel (1)
Role: Villain – out to get her younger sister for past “offenses”
Core Character Traits: revengeful; scheming; patient; critical; deceitful
Character Subtext Logline: Rachel is a deceptive older sister who is pretending to want a loving relationship with her younger foster sister.
Want:/Need: Rachel wants revenge for past hurts but needs to let go of childish hurts and old beliefs and move on with her life.
Secret: she’s pretending to want a relationship, but she wants to get Emily for past hurts by appealing to her need for love and family.
IMPROVED ITEM: Change patient to calm because I think it is more useful to develop her scheming side and make her more sincere.
Character Two: Emily (3)
Role: Protagonist – learns that her sister doesn’t want what she says she wants and she must defend herself and the ones she loves.
Core Character Traits: ambitious; creative; stubborn; hopeful; optimistic
Want:/Need: Emily wants a loving relationship with her mother and sister, but what she needs is her independence and to move on.
Character Arc: Emily starts out wanting a loving relationship with her mother and sister but ends up realizing that the love she wants she already has with her husband and adopted child.
IMPROVED ITEM: changed optimistic to assertive because optimistic was too close to hopeful.
Character Three: Eugene (6)
Role: supportive, loving husband to Emily
Core Character Traits: supportive; loyal: suspicious; tenacious;
Flaw: workaholic
World View: the world is a tough place, watch out or they will get you.
IMPROVED ITEM: liked what I had
Character Four: Lynn (2)
Role: Emily’s best friend
Core Character Traits: insightful; caring; tuned into how people feel; indirect
Flaw: not able to say no
Something they don’t want to admit about themselves: Needing to feel loved, they always put others first and neglect their wants.
IMPROVED ITEM: like what I had
Character Five: Detective Thomas (5/4)
Role: find the truth of what happened at 1301 Friendly Lane.
Core Character Traits: curious; independent; argumentative; abrasive
Character Subtext Logline: He’s a dogged detective who won’t stop pursuing a case until he gets an answer he knows is the truth.
Flaw: critical of others
What makes this character unique? He doodles when he’s investigating a case.
IMPROVED ITEM: things are okay as is.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Judith Watson.
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by
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Frank Gaide – Character Profiles
What I learned: This process weeds out extraneous description and allows you to narrow focus only on core character elements. I discovered myself applying the “front door” and “back door” tools effortlessly.
LOGLINE: “The Ugly Boat”
When an aimless young thief and his cut-throat brother get trapped on a boat with a million dollars in mob money and four dangerous strangers scheming to eliminate each other, he must decide who he can trust to survive.
CHARACTERS:
1 – TERRI (22)
Role: low level criminal/half-brother/husband and dad.
Flaw: guilt
Ch. Traits: liar – addict – dreamer – selfish
Ch. Logline: Terri is a hapless criminal who will do anything, but work, to hold onto his failing marriage.
Mission: to impress his wife with money.
Secret: jealous of his stepbrother.
Life Metaphor: money can’t buy happiness.
Arc: selfish to giving.
Change: passive trait to addict – instead of Terri living a passive life following his older brother, the word addict describes a more serious habit he has following a life of crime and unable to find discipline to overcome it.
2 – RONNI (24)
Role: low level, criminal sociopath/half-brother/boyfriend.
Ch. Traits: compulsive, abusive, self-destructive, confident
Flaw: jealousy
Ch. Logline: Ronni is a destructive criminal who eliminates anyone and anything in his path to get what he wants.
Mission: to punish his dad.
Secret: losing his mind
Life Metaphor: cut off your nose to spite your face.
Arc: mean to deadly
Uniqueness: big as hulk for his age
Thing He Won’t Admit: respect for his dad
Change: cynical trait to self-destructive because it’s most in Ronni’s nature to harm himself through unchecked emotion than imagining a lost world.
3 – ROSE (21)
Role: Ronni’s girlfriend
Flaw: artless
Ch. Traits: fierce, faithful, candid, naïve
Ch. Logline: Ronni’s gun moll who would go to hell and back for him.
Mission: to please Ronni
Arc: faithful to disloyal
Secret: jealous of Terri’s marriage to Kat
Thing She Won’t Admit: Terri is cuter than Ronni
Change: honest trait to candid because honest makes her too angelic.
4 – IZZY (40s)
Role: cheating wife/girlfriend
Ch. Traits: deceitful, selfish, controlling, gambler
Flaw: too self-reliant
Ch. Logline: Izzy is a white trash, femme fatale with brains fighting to get out of a trapped marriage for lack of money.
Mission: get rich and exit her life and marriage
Life Metaphor: take what life gives you
Thing She Won’t Admit: hates her boyfriend, Diesel.
Secret: would love to make love with a young man
Change: maverick trait to gambler because Izzy isn’t just a rebel, she’s the type of exciting person willing to bet her life on choices, win or lose.
5 – RED (55)
Role: mob boss/dad
Ch. Traits: cold-blooded, sadistic, confident, vengeful
Flaw: arrogance
Ch. Logline: Red is a brutal mob boss and drug dealer who would stop at nothing to maintain his power over South Boston.
Mission: to become more powerful through dealing drugs
Secret: who is his son, Terri or Ronni?
Thing He Won’t Admit: Love for Ronni
Change:
6 – DIESEL (60)
Role: boat owner, fisherman/boyfriend
Ch. Traits: reckless, narcissistic, stubborn, witless
Flaw: cocky
Ch. Logline: Diesel is an aging fisherman desperate to hold onto his virility and eager to exit the failing fishing business by smuggling drugs.
Mission: to get rich without fishing
Thing He Won’t Admit: he hates taking orders from Izzy
Secret: he knows Izzy is just using him
Change:
7 – KAT (20)
Role: wife and mother
Ch. Traits: skeptical, tenacious, malcontent, loyal
Flaw: too romantic
Ch. Logline: Kat is a strong, young wife and Mom who believes the only way to save their failing marriage is if Terri goes to work and abandons Ronni and their criminal dreams.
Arc: fear of being a single mom to finding courage to leave her husband
Secret: move as far away as possible from South Boston
Life Metaphor: fool’s paradise
Change: too caring flaw to romantic because her life ambition is more fantasy related than hard core reality.
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Leo’s Character Profiles
What I learned doing this assignment is that it is helpful to do character analysis on more than just the two or three main characters. I had never gone beyond that before.
LOGLINE – DEAD SOLDIERS – Horror – When her music school is sabotaged by a gang of vampires, an Army widow is helped by a voodoo priestess to raise her dead husband and his ancestors from their graves to battle the vampires and try to save her students.
Character 1: Acadia
Role: Protagonist. Owner of Academy for the Lively Arts
Core Character Traits: caring, talented, matter of fact, reality-basedCharacter Subtext Logline: After an unfortunate, lonely childhood, Acadia is coming into her own, but tends to sarcasm to hide feelings and needs.
Flaw: Pessimistic because she keeps losing people
World View: Doesn’t believe in the supernatural
IMPROVED ITEM: Change “matter of fact” to “emotionally vulnerable”, because that’s what causes her subtext, and “matter of fact” is not that different from “reality-based”.Character 2: Fabien
Role: Antagonist. Wants to get control of Academy for the Lively Arts because it is over a demonic portal.
Core Character Traits: Arrogance
Character Subtext Logline: Fabien hates himself but wants power over others to boost his ego
Flaw: He trusts no one
Secret: He’s a vampire.
IMPROVED ITEM: Change “wants power over others to boost his ego” to “wants power to take revenge on the city he blames for making him evil.” My original vision of Fabien was too generic of a vampire character. I see him now as a deeply damaged, sad, and vengeful character. Also, will add “charm” and “duplicity” to his Core Character Traits.Character 3: Bianca
Role: Mentor to Acadia and secretly a Voodoo Queen.
Core Character Traits: Caring
Character Subtext Logline: Wants to help Acadia because of all the good she is doing for the kids in the neighborhood, but needs to hide her voodoo connection.
Flaw: Impulsive
Secret: She had an affair with Fabien when they were young and she has never found another man.
What makes this character unique? She was part of Fabien’s world, but resisted corruption.IMPROVED ITEM: Need to develop this character more, so will add Core Character Traits of charitable, creative, and strong willed.
Character 4: Ben
Role: Sidekick/Guardian for Acadia
Core Character Traits: loyal, brave
Flaw: Physically weak in Zombie form compared to when he was alive.
Want/Need: To see Acadia happy again
Character Arc: Confusion about what has happened to acceptance of the spiritual world.IMPROVED ITEM: Had not analyzed Ben before or thought about his archetype so everything is new and should help.
Character 5: Mia
Role: Cotagonist. Teenage Mia wants to help Acadia, but her hidden personal problems and moral choices create problems for Acadia.
Core Character Traits: Passionate, morally confused
Character Subtext Logline: Mia’s desperation to find help for her disabled mother causes her to make choices she must hide from everyone.
Flaw: Lacks moral compass
Mission/Agenda: Get money for her mom
Secret: She has done favors for Fabien in return for money
IMPROVED ITEM: As with Ben, had not written down any of this before, so everything is an improvement. -
Althea’s Character Profiles
What I learned from this assignment is that the characters will reveal themselves throughout the writing process. Again, I see how helpful looking at individual parts in isolation can be.
LOGLINE: Missing her deceased mother and desperate to grow up, a plant-loving middle schooler secretly plays matchmaker for her Father, using a popular dating app.
Character Name : Roberta (Bobbie)
Role: Middle schooler/daughter
Core Character Traits:
– Sensitive intellectual
– Reserved
– High Achiever
– Focused
– Stubborn
Character Subtext Logline: Bobbie is a teenager who wants to distract her Father so she can act more grown up.
Flaw: Too stubborn to see the community of support around her.
Life Metaphor/identity: She will always be Daddy’s little girl.
Mission: Find a girlfriend for her Father
Want: More independence, Acceptance Need: Love, Security,
Character Arc: Goes from feeling alone to valuing the community of support she has.
Change:
Focused to frequently in a zone and detached from the world.
Character Name: Robert Gladden, MD
Role: Father/Physician, Best selling Author
Core Character Traits:
– Charming
– Responsible
– Short fuse
– Workaholic
Character Subtext Logline: Robert feels a disconnect between him and his daughter since the passing of his wife 2 years ago that causes him to hold on too tightly.
Flaws: Confident bordering on arrogance.
Doubts that he can make a real connection with Bobbie.
Life Metaphor/identity: I can understand the mysteries of the brain but can’t have a meaningful relationship with my daughter.
Want: Better relationship with Bobbie Need: Love, Faith
Character Arc: Goes from unsure around Bobbie to more hopeful about their relationship.
Change:
Elevate responsible to hovering, paying too much attention for a teenager’ comfort and also fits since he is the only parent alive.
Character Name: Dee
Role: Middle Schooler/Bobbie’s Best Friend
Core Character Traits:
– Loyal
– Supportive
– Good Natured
Character Subtext Logline: Dee supports Bobbie but tells her what bad ideas lying and going to the party would be.
Character Name: Monaglenn
Role: Nemesis to Bobbie/ New girl
Core Character Traits:
– Typical Mean girl
– Snooty
– Jealous of Bobbie’s apparent confidence
Character Subtext Logline: Monaglenn is a bully who recently moved to town and is won over by Bobbie’s act of kindness.
Flaws: Angry and mean on purpose.
Life Metaphor/Identity: Queen Bee
Want: Followers, To move back to Charlotte Need: Love, a hug, approval
Character Name: Adira Holloway
Role: Dating app developer/potential love interest for Robert
Core Character Traits:
– Risk Taker
– Resilient
– Driven
– Dreamer
Character Subtext Logeline :Hurt from many previous relationships, Adira creates a dating app so everyone else can fall in love.
Flaw: Workaholic
Life Metaphor/Identity: Dedicating her life to the happiness of others.
Want: Prove she can be successful apart from her Father.
Need: Love, Better life balance
Character Arc: Goes from no time for romance to seeing Robert as a possible love interest.
Change Driven to compulsive and micromanaging.
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What I learned doing this assignment: This was very interesting; as I lost a massive amount of updated work I’d done on characters – I started with a old version and re-wrote, elevated as I transferred the info. I used a ‘full profile chart’ I created in the pro-series class, and it’s unbelievable how much each character grows when you look at so many of their sides… I became each character, really delved into what and how they think, what motivates them and at their deepest level who they are. Very enlightening.
Diana / Character Profiles
The heir to a Big Game Hunting empire falls hard for a wildlife conservationist, forcing him into a life-changing altercation with his sadistic father. His plans to convert a failing Wildlife Sanctuary into a Naturalist Hunting Lodge with his best mate are completely derailed, and he must choose between his new love, lifelong friend, and his family legacy.
Character #1 – Dakarai ‘Kai’ Richards
Role: Protagonist
Core Character Traits: Captivating, Compassionate Rebellious, Confident, Wild, Naturalist
Character Subtext: I am protected, and in turn I am a guardian, I can overcome all challenges.
Flaw: Terrified of true intimacy for fear of losing the one he loves
Motivation: To escape his father’s control and leave ‘that’ world, and all the pain he’s endured behind – to start fresh and new
Want: To escape Africa and build a new life with his best mate Adam and build a naturalist hunting lodge.
Want shifts to#2: to find a new balance that can work for the three of them, and mature into the man he knows he can be, becoming worthy of Tara’s love and admiration
Need: to prove to himself he has the strength to overcome his fears
World View: Deep respect for nature and all life, he is the caretaker of his world
Secret: Kai knows his father murdered his mother and before he left Africa, he gave the DIG proof of his father’s corruption. ALSO Kai is immediately infatuated by Tara, but has no idea how to reach her
What’s Special: He’s extremely passionate, loyal, and loving with deep spiritual Maasai beliefs
CHANGE: On the surface he is extremely confident, but I added fear to his base character, therefore he becomes more real, less perfect.
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Character #2 – Martin Richards
Role – Antagonist
Core Character Traits: Sadistic, Ruthless, Powerful, Corrupt, Entitled
Character Subtext: It’s ALL mine!
Flaw: Overconfidence, believes he is utterly untouchable
Motivation: To secure his dominance over Kai and ultimately take over and convert the sanctuary into a Big-Game Hunting lodge
Want: to have dominance over all things, to be revered as a god.
Need: force Kai into submission, and mold Adam into his heir
World View: The worlds for my taking; I’ve earned dominance over all things
Secret: Covered up his wife’s murder with a ‘hunting accident’. Had long term affair with Adam’s mother, is Adam’s father
What’s Special: He’s an expert marksman
CHANGE: I increased his ruthlessness, making his more despicable and a greater threat
———————————————————————————————Character #3 – Adam Jackson ‘AJ’
Role – Best Buddy AND Antagonist #2 (deuteragonist)
Core Character Traits: Dependent, resentful, fearful, addictive, immature, Antagonistic
Character Subtext: It’s not my fault! Everyone turns on me.
Flaw: His insecurities and addictions cause him to manipulate the people he cares most about; he feels he’s not worthy of attention and love
Motivation: anger and addiction are motivating his actions, he’s out of control. He’s hurt by what he sees as rejection, displeasure from Tara
Want: To start over, secure a new future with his best mate. Hurt Tara for rejecting him.
Need: To regain Tara’s trust, acceptance, and love. To make amends with Kai, and overcome his addictions
World View: I’ve gotta cover my arse, can’t count on anyone else to
Secret: extremely envious of Kai, always wished Martin was his father. Actually, is in love with Tara
What’s Special: He is one of the best Zoologists and wildlife biologist in Australia
CHANGE: gave him more vulnerability, not as an excuse for his bad behavior, but as a means of understanding his motivation and character
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Character #4 – Tara (no last name)
Role – Protagonist’s Love Interest
Core Character Traits: Authentic, Sensual, Magical, Steadfast, Wildlife Advocate
Character Subtext: I am here to protect all life; I can overcome all obstacles and offer my help to those in need
Flaw: Tara’s fearful of being left alone, so she’s shut people out and focuses all her attention on her wildlife and conservation.
Motivation: Save the wildlife Sanctuary and maintain control and balance
Want: To build a team who are loyal, honest, and trustworthy and share her conservation mission
Need: to overcome her fears, so she can forgive Adam, trust Kai and open herself to the possibilities
World View: I’ll do what it takes to protect nature, wildlife, create peace and serenity into the world.
Secret: She gets lonely sometimes and wants a worthy partner to share her life with. Tara’s blown away by Kai and thinks ‘he’s the one’.
What’s Special: A deep spiritual bond with wildlife, willing to make any sacrifice to protect those she loves, a profound connection with mystical AU Aboriginal beliefs
CHANGE: changed her background, so she is actually raised by the AU Aboriginal Tribe after her mother’s death, and she inherits/learns their mystical ways and deeper connection with nature
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Character #5 – Deputy Inspector General Bahari Zuberi (DIG Barahi Zuberi)
Role – Secondary Character, Cameo
Core Character Traits: courageous, foresightful, discreet, incorruptible
Character Subtext: My mission is to rid the world I can reach, of evil and corruption
Flaw: puts himself ion danger to accomplish his mission
Motivation: To make sure justice prevails
Want: to bring Martin Richards to justice for murdering his wife, and corrupt activities
Need: to protect Kai, his nephew, at any cost
World View: It is man’s responsibility to protect all life and promote peace in the world.
Secret: He’s hiding evidence that would bring Adam up on charges
What’s Special: He’s a career military man, multi weapons expert and brave beyond belief.
CHANGE: Added family ties to Kai, his mother Jade was his sister, which makes Martin his brother in law.
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David’s Character Profiles.
“What I learned doing this assignment is…?” It’s relatively easy to change the role of a person in a script and then change the character profile. It’s more difficult to improve a character profile because the person fits into a jigsaw puzzle of many different parts. Of course, this was the challenge of the assignment.
The logline is:
A bullied eighteen-year-old needs to solve the mystery of a treasure map, or a Cult of religious psychopaths, descended from the Spanish Inquisition, will murder his family.Improve at least one item on each character profile.
Paul Mouton.
Role. The Protagonist. Poor high schooler. Family member. An eighteen-year-old who drives the story by finding and defending a sunken treasure from religious fanatics.
Core traits. Anxious, fearful of failure, reticent, bookish, needy.
Character subtext logline. Paul is a high school student who has adventure thrust on him by his family. Embarrassed by his poverty and overwhelmed by his brave father’s death, he runs from challenges.
Flaw. He feels inferior but pretends otherwise.
Want/Need. To find a treasure. To feel successful. /To be loved. To feel unpressured.
Mission/Agenda. To achieve something notable. To leave his town.
Character Arc. From timid, soft, and uncommitted to bold, hard and involved.
World View. Beaten down by circumstances.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Protect oneself by not committing.
Secret. He is embarrassed by his poverty.
Something they don’t want to admit about themselves: Afraid.
What makes this character unique? Smart. Can think.Improve Items.
Role. The Protagonist. Poor high schooler. Family member. An eighteen-year-old who drives the story by finding and defending a sunken treasure from religious fanatics.
Core traits. Curiosity. Paul’s uncle Jack tries to conceal the map and his family’s history from Paul. Paul’s curiosity drives him to discover the secret while remaining ignorant of the Cult, who are still hunting him.
Character subtext. An academic curiosity drives Paul.
Flaw. He doesn’t know when to stop.
Want/Need. To solve problems. /To feel rewarded.
Mission/Agenda. To find the answer to the strange behaviors.
Character Arc: From nerdy bookish to practical achiever.World View. Life is a mystery to be solved.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Something is missing in his life.Secret. He wants to belong.
What makes this character unique? Cerebral.
Change Items.
Core traits. Angry. He resists the attempts of people to help him until he realizes the danger, he has placed them in. Then he fights back.
Character subtext. Paul wants to rescue people. He is well off and sophisticated. Sandy is not.
Or Paul is reckless and initiates the action. He drags people into the search and endangers them.
Flaw. Feels superior until others rescue him during the search.
Secret. Gay. Sandy is male. Or Paul falls for Syd.
Captain Jack Mouton
Role. Patriarch of the Mouton family. Keeper of the treasure map and its history.
Core traits. Obsessed, tribal, stubborn, old-fashioned.
Character subtext. He wants to retain his family role as patriarch.
Flaw. Intolerant, old-fashioned, limited.
Want/Need. To stop searching. / To relax.
Mission/Agenda. To achieve the end of a centuries-old search.
Character Arc: Crusty old shrimper to relaxed old bar owner.World View. Real men do real work.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Keep moving.Secret. Something they don’t want to admit: He is obsessed
What makes this character unique? Commitment to an unlikely goal.
Improve Items.Role. Patriarch of the Mouton family. Keeper of the treasure map and its history.
Core traits. Uncertain. Little drive to finish the search.
Character subtext. After 200 years it’s time to stop.
Flaw. Won’t express himself. Won’t ask for help.
Change Items.
Role. Comic relief. The salty old curmudgeon who doesn’t believe the map Paul finds.
Core traits. Vengeful. Wants to kill Cult members for all the murders over the years.
Character subtext. Angry at the times leaving him behind with no close friends and no future. Puts barriers in the search.
Character Arc: Defeated failure to successful treasure hunter.
Flaw. Boastful. Gives away information.
Want/Need. To be recognized as an important person. He pushes the search to a dangerous direction.
The Grand Inquisitor
Role. The antagonist. An evil, sophisticated religious fanatic. Seeks the treasure and will do anything to get it.Core traits. Fanatic, amoral, religious, unswerving.
Character subtext. Sincerely believes he can restore the Inquisition and will get to Heaven.
Flaw. Feels superior.
Want/Need. To rule on Earth and Heaven and become a Saint.
Mission/Agenda. Find the Santa Elena. Restore the Inquisition.
Character Arc: Calm, powerful, and successful to uncontrolled, weak, and loserWorld View. Everything not in his false worldview is false.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Crush anything in his way.Secret. His plan.
What makes this character unique? Pure malice.
Improve Items.
Role. The Antagonist. An evil, sophisticated religious fanatic. Seeks the treasure and will do anything to get it.
Core traits. Insane. Must catch himself from going berserk.
Character subtext. Must be rewarded on earth.
Flaw. Wants gold now to finance an expensive lifestyle.
Want/Need. Money and religious success. / Sex.
Change Items.
Role. He rejects the past malice of the Cult because he has found a pacific religion. He destroys the Cult from inside while pretending to attack Paul’s crew.
Core traits. Duplicitous, and benevolent. He must maintain an undercover façade while betraying his Cult.
Character subtext. Anguished at his Cult’s past and seeks redemption.
Flaw. Too soft-hearted for his new goal.
Want/Need. To get to Heaven. Protects Paul in secret.
Sandy Landry.
Role. Protagonist’s girlfriend. Contrasting background and world view compared to Protagonist.
Core traits. Sophisticated, worldly, independent, romantic.
Character subtext. Her own person.
Flaw. Doesn’t compromise.
Want/Need. To live a civilized life of achievement.
Mission/Agenda. Live a genteel life.
Character Arc: Becomes more involved with the group.World View. The world is her oyster.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Take the easy way.Secret. Dislikes her social-climbing mother.
What makes this character unique? Independent of others’ expectations.
Improve Items.
Role. Protagonist’s girlfriend. Contrasting background and world view compared to Protagonist.
Core traits. Sexy, uninhibited.
Character subtext. Many mores are meant to be ignored.
Flaw. Incautious.
Want/Need. To live a full life. / Excitement.
Mission/Agenda. To live fully.
Character Arc: To become Paul’s girlfriend and then when he becomes a success to move on.World View. The world is meant to be exploited.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Take the self-centered exciting way.Secret. Is conscious of hurting people but does it anyway.
What makes this character unique? Selfish.
Change Items.
Role. A secret member of the Cult. She tries to get the secret of the map from Paul and will kill him if necessary.
Core traits. Greedy, amoral, predatory. Will do anything to get Paul’s love and trust. Will destroy the Cult too if needed to get what she wants.
Character subtext. Feels basically inferior. Needs to get her way.
Flaw. Can’t always think or wait to achieve her goals.
Want/Need. To be boss.
Mission/Agenda. To run the Cult. She will fight the Grand Inquisitor.
Character Arc: From pleasant loving teen to a vicious killer.World View. A psychopath.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Anything is justified to succeed.Secret. She is a monster.
What makes this character unique? Her pathology.
Lenny Felder.
Role. Sidekick. Father figure.
Core traits. Practical, technical, earthy, brave.
Character subtext. Comfortable only when doing.
Want/Need. To be solving problems.
Mission/Agenda. To fulfill a moral obligation.
Character Arc: From adventurous to settled.World View. Do a job.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Get the job done.Secret. Doesn’t say.
What makes this character unique? A character that approaches the goal from a practical, not an emotional, direction.
Improve Items.
Role. Sidekick. Father figure.
Core traits. Protective.
Character subtext. Looking for a home.
Flaw. Difficulty to make emotional connections.
Want/Need. To help Paul socially. / To belong to a family.
Mission/Agenda. To protect the family.
Character Arc: From engineer to a family member.World View. Work with people.
Life Metaphor/Identity. Join a family.Secret. Doesn’t know how to be a member of a group.
What makes this character unique? Lives in the present.
Change Items.
Role. A historian who came across papers in the Vatican that informed him of the treasure. He is going to steal it.
Core traits. Unscrupulous but not violent.
Character subtext. History is an exciting way to enrich himself.
Flaw. Greedy but too soft.
Want/Need. Recognition as a historian and the money.
Mission/Agenda. Sees history as an adventure in loot.
Character Arc: Greedy excited academic to failed treasure hunter to on to the next adventure. Maybe with Paul.World View. A fun and adventurous place.
Life Metaphor/Identity. A pirate.Secret. He wanted to be a writer.
What makes this character unique? He perverted an academic discipline.
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Hi Diana,
Your script is coming along nicely. I tried to be as specific as I could, as bland does no one a favor. Overall, I am enjoying your script.
Kai: He makes a good protag. Same advice about your multiple traits. Though I, too, am sifting through traits in our assignments. (I imagine Hal will get to this, but it’s something we should already know. We should go for the gusto. Write with the most identifying trait and stick with it throughout the script.
I wondered if Kai had any proof concerning his father killing his mother? Also, does his flaw show up down the road? Do you show him having trouble with intimacy? I think a lot of what we write about our characters never show up on our scripts. We kind of gloss over them and they fade away, and we lose an opportunity to show the character as we initially viewed him. Vulnerability takes the stage with weakness and flaws– a chance for the audience to identify with the character. I love Kai’s world view. Shows he is an admirable character…
Martin Richards: I love his core character traits. But, I would pick the strongest three. Narcissism covers a lot of his entitled trait. Ruthless and powerful are neighbors—too much alike. Corrupt is stronger than ruthless. In fact, they’re kin. Lol. Oh my gosh—so much fun.I believe his flaw/want sifts down to narcissism.
The secret is confusing to me. I thought Martin was Kai’s father, and all of a sudden, he’s Adam’s. And then, Adam’s wishing Martin was his father. I think that was the only thing that was fuzzy. You write so well…
Adam Jackson: Once again, too many traits. I remember in the MSC, Hal made us convert dialogue and action based on the character traits. It was a real pain, but it did define the idiosyncrasies of that character, no matter if we liked it or not. How do you do that with six traits? It’s a bit much. You are thorough and that’s good, but you can winnow them down and pick the strongest ones. That’s what I would do. Just an opinion.
What’s special: If the guy is the best zoologist/biologist, it would add to his confidence levels in how he handles his life. Since it doesn’t, I would consider the why of his insecurities. Lend him some incompetence. Show that he is not good at his job; which in turn, would define his insecurities. Just a suggestion.
Martin Richards: I love your core traits. He should be easy to write cause he’s so defined. But I would further define it by picking out the three strongest traits. Narcissism covers a lot of territory. Ruthless and powerful are cousins. Jealousy would be a good one. Most narcissists harbor a lot of jealousy. But I think his flaw is narcissism. Just my take on it…I’m probably way ahead on these traits, but how can one re-write without clarity?
Tara: I’d give her a last name. Complete her. It lends integrity. Core traits: too many. I love Tara. She’s someone I would like to meet. She seems real.
Zubini: I had coverage on one of my scripts awhile back, and the person who wrote it, couldn’t even get my character’s names right. When people care they get things right. It was a waste of time and money. I notice names, and his is unique. Good choice. His subtext to me is, he’s a cowboy with a white hat. The guy who saves the fainting damsel in distress. Great character. Overall, enjoyed your writing and your character profiles. Thanks. KC
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Heather’s Assignment Day 4
What I learned from doing this:
I always do character studies, but not with this structure. This way is targeted to actually use in your screenplay as opposed to a novel.
1. List your logline.
Absolution: A dying priest, the only witness to the murders at a Residential School, seeks forgiveness from the boy he abused – before a renegade attorney from the Vatican silences them both.
The Trinity:
A)
Father John Ambrose – dying from Kidney cancer. The Priest seeking redemption.
Core Character traits:
A little more worldly than your average priest
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Exasperating sense of humor.
Tenacious
Faithful
Flaw: Doesn’t believe in himself
Character Arc: His faith becomes stronger as he sees the Cree’s outlook of God
Secret – has stashed photographs of the headmaster murdering children in a stone wall.
Character subtext Logline:
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, even though I am not worthy”.
Improvement: Ambrose’s faith wavers throughout because of what he has witnessed in the church. He learns to see God in everything through Jody’s eyes and his faith becomes strong. When he dies, it is with a radiant smile on his face. He knows where he is going.
B)
Bishop Robert DeGaul – head of the dioses for Southern Ontario and Ambrose’s superior. Also Ambrose’s longest friend.
Core character traits:
Could be described as a “Warrior of God.”
Gracious
Dignified
Courageous
Character Arc – his faith in the Catholic church withers over the course of the story, until he choses to become a simple man of God – a hermit, (although it is not stated outright but implied)
Something they don’t want to admit about themselves – He is tired from carrying the confessions of all of those who have come to him for absolution. He just wants to take off the armor of God and find peace.
Character’s subtext logline:
“Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil for thou art with me. Even those evils that hide within the church.”
Improvement: DeGaul’s arc is a negative arc throughout the story. But by giving him a community to belong to and an accomplished goal, he is the tired warrior allowed to rest at the end of the movie.
C)
Cardinal Ignacio Angelino: Lawyer representing the Vatican
Core character traits:
Fixated
Devoid of humor
Driven
Absolutely believes he is righteous
Flaw:
So concentrated on his goal he can’t see what’s around him.
Mission/Agenda
To do whatever it takes to ensure the continuation of his order within the Holy
Roman Catholic Church.
Improvement: Angelino was just a quazi- antagonist before. Now he has more depth.
Character’s subtext logline: “Who may ascend into the hill of the Lord? And who may stand in his Holy place?” Those of us who do the hard things that must be done in the name of the Lord.
Jody Youngblood: the child Ambrose was forced to lock in a tiny cupboard until he stopped speaking his native language.
Core Character traits:
PTSD – claustrophobia and mistrust
Alcoholic
Loner
Deep thinker
Wilderness expert
Character Flaw: Stubborn
Want: the closeness of a brother he used to have with Ambrose.
Character subtext logline:
Everyone is out to hurt to hurt you. Don’t trust anyone, because they always leave you.
Improvement: Having Jody be responsible for the man who he blames for his whole life’s problems makes him confront the truth that other people have life and death issues they have to confront in their lives. Ambrose didn’t abandon him. He saved him from being one of those murdered children. The price was Ambrose being shipped somewhere else and being unable to contact him. Jody has to face this issue and stop blaming Ambrose for the way his life turned out.
Joe Oliver: 18 year old son of the Chief.
Core character traits:
Angry
UnsureQuick thinker
Well liked
Character Flaw: leaps before he looks.
Mission: Wants to make a difference in the world.
Character subtext logline: What do I have to do to make people notice me and not my race?
Improvement: By having Joe
take responsibility for getting the evidence to the courtroom when Ambrose
can’t, it pulls him out of his teenage angst and makes him grow. He’s doing
this for the community, not for himself and the fact he has to fight someone trying
to kill him solidifies the whole experience for him.-
These are profound character traits and beautifully expressed.
I might suggest making Angelino more evil. Perhaps “assassin” rather than “rogue attorney”.
DeGaulle’s arc doesn’t seem “negative” to me.
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Benito Selim’s Character Profiles
What I learned doing this assignment is breaking down each character to their foundation gives for a better rewrite. If you’re having trouble with each character’s voice breaking them down will uplift them more to stand out as an individual.
DETOUR- HORROR
Two sisters and their friends on their way to the Florida Keys for spring break become stranded in the everglades. Their situation becomes dire as they are hunted by reptiles who have grown mysteriously aggressive, and unprovoked.
CHARACTER PROFILES
Character 1: Kayla Evans
Role: Main character, Sister
Core Character Traits
– Party girl
– yearning for acceptance
– Naive
Character Subtext Logline: Kayla is a party sorority girl who is naïve to people befriending her because she just wants to be accepted.
Flaw: feels like she failed her parents because she isn’t an academic success.
Life Metaphor/Identity: Having her own voice and not being compared to her sister.
Want: A new life. Need: Being her own individual and having a loving relationship with her sister.
Character Arc: Goes from a slacking party girl to a hero to save multiple lives.
Character 2: Lynette Evans
Role: Main character 2, Sister
Core Character Traits
– Academic
– socially awkward
– Depressed
Character Subtext Logline: Lynette is an academic who is punished under her genius state.
Flaw: Despite being younger feels she can’t leave her sister alone, offers help when not needed.
Life Metaphor/Identity: a survivor under elements she deemed to fail.
Want: To live not just exist. Need: A solid and loving relationship with her sister.
Character Arc: Goes from a perceived bookworm to hardcore survivalist.
Character 3: Aaron Lender
Role: Herpetologist (reptile doctor)
Core Character Traits
– Reptile enthusiast
– Wants to find a new break through on reptiles
Character Subtext Logline: Dr. Aaron Lender is Herpetologist who constantly is researching reptiles, he wants a breakthrough study to uplift his position towards his legacy.
Flaw: feels shunned by his peers and wants to excel his field.
Life Metaphor/Identity: Becoming a sought after and respectable Herpetologist.
Want: A legacy. Need: Taken seriously.
Character Arc: An intern learning the ropes of being a reptile doctor to having a breakthrough study on new characteristics of reptiles.
Character 4: Paul Banks
Role: Park Ranger, wildlife wrangler
Core Character Traits
– Wildlife enthusiasts
– Connects with the land and its inhabitants of the swamp
– Survivalist
Character Subtext Logline: Ranger Paul Banks is an expert survivalist who is using his skills to preserve the everglades swamp.
Flaw: Excels at his job without promoting.
Life Metaphor/Identity: Becoming the head ranger and implementing programs to keep the swamp resourceful.
Want: to be the head man in charge. Need: Taken seriously.
Character Arc: A park ranger that loves the outdoors to a survivalist hero that saved multiple lives.
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LESSON 4:
LOGLINE: A magical dragon’s penchant for stealing, results in a prison sentence for his only friend, forcing them to go on the lam to outer space.
For the Love of Percy
A buddy screenplay.
Character profile:
Percy the Dragon: One of the screenplay’s protags; the other is his buddy, Dusty.
Character Traits: Impulsive, undercover, invisible; evasive, secretive
Character subtext: A long-nosed, yellow-fanged, fire breathing, thieving, Robin Hood type, dragon.
Flaw: Inability to comprehend the laws of man.
Need: To belong/ be believable, which stems from trying to fit in a human world.
Want: To protect/save his friend Dusty– his only friend in the world.
Character Arc: Percy arcs from a dragon, deserted on earth, to king of the Planet Freome with Dusty.
Fear: Fear of losing his only friend and never have a life on earth.
Agenda: Escape Earth. Find a good- looking female, (one with swagger,) and include Dusty as family.
Secret: He loves Princess Zenith, from Planet Freome, not knowing she is his sister.
What he doesn’t want to admit to himself: He may never be able to fill his agenda and end up alone.
Trait for improving script: Crafty. One given to deceptive plotting instead of clueless plotting.
Dusty Greene- An overweight, 9 y/o, vulnerable, foster kid with red hair, freckles, and Coca Cola glasses.
Character Traits: Insecure, bullied, isolated, invisible.
Character Subtext: Clueless; invisible/Little John in Robin Hood—never quite sure of himself.
Flaw: No confidence.
Need: to know who he is.
Want: To be accepted
Character Arc: From a kid who doesn’t know who he is, to a royal subject on another planet.
Fear: To never fit; to not ever find true love.
**Agenda: Be a brave knight in shining armor with Percy, instead of a coward against his three bullies.
Secret: No one knows he knows a dragon, and he’s his best friend.
What he doesn’t want to admit to himself? That his life may never change.
Trait for improving script: Bravery– for his self concept.
Nurse Phoebe:
Royal Aunt to slain king and queen; Nursemaid to their infant twins, Prince Percy and Princess Zenith.
Character Traits: Dedicated, loyal, intelligent, magical,
Character subtext: A Maid Marion. Do-gooder, supporter to her murdered brother, and his queen.
Flaw: She masks her emotions, but lives in constant fear.
Need: Obsessed with protecting the prince and princess to the risk of her own life.
Want: to survive
Character arc: The nurse who protects the infants, becomes the matriarch of the family,
Fear: For her life.
Agenda: To ensure the twins survive the takeover and continue her family’s lineage.
Secret: Always on the lookout for escape.
What she doesn’t want to admit to herself: That she is living on hope, knowing the wicked queen wants her dead. What will happen to the prince and princess if this happens?
Trait for improving script? To be more sensual attracting the dragon king to her plight.
Princess Zenith:
Dragon princess, daughter to slain king and queen. Twin to Percy. Kidnapped by invading king.
Character traits: Confident, spoiled, demanding
Character subtext: A Rapunzel princess who lets down her hair whenever she can get away with it.
Flaw: Lives in a fairy tale where princesses marry for love and not political implications.
Need: To make her own choices without the king’s interference. To grow up.
Wants: Percy
Fear: That she will not be able to marry for love, but for the good of the kingdom.
Agenda: To find a way to find Percy.
Secret: She dreams of escaping and tracking down her true love, which is Percy.
What she doesn’t want to admit to herself: That she may have lost Percy forever.
Traits for improving script: A suspicious nature that makes her question her kidnappers.
TOBY MILLS, 39, An old Army buddy of Dusty’s comes to the funeral and cabin.
Character Traits: A party animal, womanizer, and salesmen.
Character Subtext: Dusty’s an old Army buddy, a Fonzie party animal.
Flaw: An old Fonzie party animal.
Need: To be young.
Wants: A good time.
Fear: He’s losing his looks.
Agenda: Eat, drink and be merry.
Secret: He’s homeless; his women pay for his ride.
What does he not want to admit to himself? That he has made a mess of his life and he hangs onto friends like Dusty, cause that’s all he has left.
Traits for improving script? The sly trait. After he says good by to Dusty for the last time, Dusty’s, heirloom, dragon pendant that’s his father left him, is missing.
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PATTI’S CHARACTER PROFILES
What I learned doing this assignment is that your character has to be a real person, not some one dimensional cliche.
LOGLINE: A Harvard biologist returns to her roots when she inherits a house in unhinged Key West and discovers mystery, murder, magic, and mayhem are part of her inheritance. As a deadly hurricane turns towards the island chain, she must come to grips with the past and future, both as dangerous as the coming storm.
1. Character Name: Rose Kelly
Role in the Story: Scientist, daughter, sister
Core Character Traits:
Independent Loner
Witty
Abrasive
Stubborn
Character Subtext Logline: Rose needs bucks to continue her research and sees the house she inherited as the way to get them.
Flaw: Rose was raised to coldly approach any mystery with a scientific mind, so she doesn’t believe in anything intangible. Also, she sometimes doesn’t think before blurting out something rude, and pretty much doesn’t care.
Want: A loving family. Need: Supportive friends.
Character Improvement: Character arc has Rose becoming less independent and more reliant upon her friends, and discovering that friends can be better than family.
2. Character Name: Miller “Hotdog” Robinson
Role in the Story: Childhood best friend to Rose and Mitsu. Bartender, frustrated writer.
Core Character Traits:
Ladies’ Man
Handsome and Gregarious
Big-hearted, giving
Sincere
Character Subtext Logline: Bartender by day, frustrated writer by night, searching for words and love.
Wants: Everyone to get along as one big happy family. Needs: Searching for love, from his mother and others.
Character Improvement: Miller finds that good looks and charm aren’t enough to win the woman he wants, and this realization breaks the writer’s block he has been experiencing.
3. Character Name: Mitsu Beaudreux
Role in the Story: Childhood best friend to Rose and Miller. Florist who secretly dabbles in Voodoo.
Core Character Traits:
Generous
Secretive
Intelligent
Insightful
Character Subtext Logline: Doesn’t always want the mystic gifts she was born with.
Secret: Doesn’t want others to know of her Voodoo heritage, thinks of it as a curse not a gift.
Character Improvement: Sometimes you have to go with what you know is right, even if others won’t understand, so Mitsu will finally embrace her Voodoo heritage.
4. Character Name: Stuart McCoy
Role in the Story: An attorney and Rose’s distant cousin who would do ANYTHING to get his hands on the treasure he believes is hidden in Rose’s house.
Core Character Traits:
Rude
Self-centered
Sneaky
Greedy
Character Subtext Logline: The man everyone loves to hate, but wins cases for his clients. Doesn’t appear to have any redeeming qualities.
Secret: wants to be loved and accepted instead of despised.
Character Improvement: Well, maybe he’s not ALL bad….
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by Patricia Snyder.
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Your character’s traits seem well developed.
How is Rose’s role related to daughter and sister?
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This reply was modified 3 years ago by
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What I learned doing this assignment is that examining these characters under such a bright light makes them come even more alive to me.
Susan’s Character Profiles
Triplicity: Barely surviving a brutal wildfire that consumes her life’s dream, a tortured veterinarian must overthrow the emotional yoke of three men’s wounded psyches to save herself from their wreckage.
1. Kari
REQUIRED:
Role in the story: Lead character
Core Character Traits (no more than five)
– innocent
– compassionate
– denial
– loving
– trusting
Character Subtext Logline: By treating others well she mistreats herself.
OPTIONAL:
Flaw: rose-colored glasses
Want/Need: to be needed
Mission/Agenda: to save her marriage
Character Arc (if any): complete neglect of self to attainment of self-worth
World View: everyone is good
Life Metaphor/Identity: gives away her own identity
Secret: abusive relationship
Something they don’t want to admit about themselves: codependency
What makes this character unique? She doesn’t think evil exists in the world, just people demonstrating their own hurt.
I changed hurting as a character trait to denial. She isn’t hurting on a constant level because she is essentially a joyful person. Her hurt stems from shock and denial that someone who proclaims to love her can consistently mistreat her.
2. John
REQUIRED:
Role in the story: Kari’s husband
Core Character Traits (no more than five)
– entitled
– arrogant
– selfish
– abusive
– controlling
Character Subtext Logline: He sees himself as a victim of these traits that he believes exists in everyone else, but not him
OPTIONAL:
Flaw: He thinks control will bring him happiness
Want/Need: others catering to him to prove their love for him
Mission/Agenda: having people’s respect
World View: His needs are more important than anyone else’s
I changed his mission/agenda from being viewed as a king to having people respect him, where respect in his mind means that he is always right and any disagreement means disrespecting him.
3. Jack
REQUIRED:
Role in the story: Lead character’s love interest
Core Character Traits (no more than five)
– romantic
– charismatic
– handsome
– superficial
– energetic
Character Subtext Logline: He is able to mold himself in the eyes of others to get what he wants from them.
OPTIONAL:
Flaw: empty inside, all is for show
Want/Need: hungry for attention
Mission/Agenda: to be praised
World View: he is a gift to the world
Secret: All this attention doesn’t fill the hole in his soul
Something they don’t want to admit about themselves: he thinks rejection is the worst thing in the world
I changed him not knowing how to deal with rejection to him responding wildly and completely withdrawing after rejection because his self-image completely rests on others’ reactions to him.
4. JJ
REQUIRED:
Role in the story: Soul mate to lead character
Core Character Traits (no more than five)
– vulnerable
– gentle
– devastated by life
– sweet
– deep waters
Character Subtext Logline: Though he plays the victim, he mistrusts kindness, which completely closes himself off from others.
OPTIONAL:
Flaw: terrorized by his past
Want/Need: a mother
Mission/Agenda: to spread his pain
World View: Life is only pain
I changed his logline from him being so damaged that he can’t recognize kindness to him violently mistrusting kindness. This will sharpen his reactions to kindness in the story.
5. Bridget
REQUIRED:
Role in the story: Lead character’s friend/savior
Core Character Traits (no more than five)
– down to earth
– friendly
– humorous
– helpful
– honest
Character Subtext Logline: she needs to validate her own experience by helping others out of abusive relationships
OPTIONAL:
Flaw: still holds resentment and anger
Want/Need: revenge against her ex (Kari’s current boyfriend)
Mission/Agenda: to wake up Kari
World View: Romantic relationships aren’t worth it
I changed her world view that romantic relationships aren’t worth it, to a healthy recognition that some romantic relationships aren’t worth it, but not all, and now she has the wisdom to tell the difference.
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