Day 5: Elevate Your Characters’ Stories

[Elliott Williams]

Elliott Williams

What I learned – This is a clear way to see if a character actually has an arc. Although this can be helpful it can be time consuming if you get caught up in the details.

APRIL

BEGINNING: April tries to establish her independence from her parents.

MIDDLE: April tries to uncover why the CIA took her father away.

END: April has to find out how to keep from ending up like her father.

CHARACTER ARC DETAILS

ACT I

1) April comes home in disarray

2) April is angry that her mother put her back on her meds

3) April tells her parents she’s not taking meds anymore as she’s taking back her life.

4) April steals from her parents and then attempts to stop her father’s attack on her mother.

5) April tells the authorities she doesn’t know anything about why her father did what he did.

6) April tries to find anything about her dad that she doesn’t know. She finds a cache of marked magnets.

7) April goes to the police station to get answers, but she finds out the CIA took him away.

ACT II

1) April tries to get into a military outpost to find her dad but she’s denied.

2) April finds an old man who used to be a guard who tells her there was an accident at the outpost years ago. He tells her she’s using the wrong name for the guy in the picture she’s using.

3) April follows a guy, Kerry, who stands out, into a bar and seduces him, then asks for help.

4) April uncovers information about her father’s research under his new name and finds articles.

5) Kerry helps April get access to old files. She has visions that allow her to see someone who was a part of an old experiment. They have to find him.

6) They find Ayoki Koji, an addict. She feeds him and tries to get information, but he won’t talk. They get captured by the military.

7) April asks Field Officer Gaskins where her father, Ayoki and Kerry are, to no avail?

8) April has a vision as Ayoki and he enters her cell accusing her of trapping him for the military. She convinces him that she didn’t do it.

9) She follows Ayoki through the building as they find Kerry.

10) She follows Kerry as he leads them to her father.

11) April tries to free her father as he’s strapped down on a table, in bad shape, changing into some kind of beast. He tells her not to release him and apologizes for what he’s done to her. She is clairvoyant and in danger the longer she stays in the building. She has to get out before he changes into a beast and she does too.

ACT III

1) April escapes with Ayoki and Kerry. They try to get out of the building while avoiding soldiers who are trying to take down her father as a monster.

2) They hide in an unlocked room and discover Gaskins trying to hang himself out of despair. They save him and come up with a plan.

3) April, with the team, find magnetic coffins in the basement with a creature banging around inside.

4) April notices that Ayoki is changing and becoming weaker.

5) April escapes the room when her father cracks the magnetic case to free the other beast.

6) April runs to the entrance again, as her team gets decimated by the creatures.

7) April controls the creatures with her mind and makes them destroy each other.

8) April hitch hikes

9) April goes to the basement of her home and uses the magnets and her medication to reverse the changing of her skin.

Character Broad Strokes

1) April comes home and witnesses her dad, Brent, murder her mom.

2) April tries to get answers as to why, but she has to find him first. She finds out he has a secret past running classified tests for the military and his real name is Dr. Gant.

3) April finds Kerry who helps her break into a military outpost where he may be held, which leads to her finding an old test subject of his, Ayoki Koji.

4) April, Kerry and Ayoki meet, but are captured by Field Officer Gaskins.

5) They try to escape and break out Dr. Gant, but he won’t leave and confesses that his old tests have impacted April, she’s a clairvoyant. He transforms into a deadly beast, so they have to leave him.

6) They find Field Agent Gaskins who has a plan for stopping the Dr. Gant beast, but there are more beasts that need to be stopped.

7) The plan fails, Ayoki becomes one of the beasts when April can’t really use her abilities and they barely escape.

8) April finds out they are trapped, all of the beasts are free and everyone gets killed off except April, because she stops the beasts when she realizes she has the clairvoyant power to control the beasts.

CHANGES:

Beat 1 – This beat needs to be broken into two beats. The first is she confronts her parents about putting her on medication for all her years without exploring alternatives. And beat 2 can be that she witnessed her Dad murder her mom.

BRENT

BEGINNING: Brent rejects April and tells her to leave his house against his wife’s objections.

MIDDLE: Brent is abducted by the CIA after he kills his wife.

END: Brent confesses that he was trying to protect April from his past before he transforms into a beast.

Character Broad Strokes:

1) Brent rejects his daughter April and tells her she needs to leave in the morning.

2) Brent is possessed and murders his wife.

3) Brent is captured by the military and, when April finds him, he confesses that he ran secret tests on soldiers and some of those tests have affected April.

4) He transforms into a beast that rampages and kills many people.

CHANGES: Beat 3 needs to be split into Brent is arrested/captured. Beat 4 Brent confesses before he transforms.

ABIGAIL

BEGINNING: She tries to patch up the problems between Brent and April.

MIDDLE: Abigail justifies Brents actions to April.

END: Abigail tries to fight off Brent before he kills her.

Character Broad Strokes

1) Abigail medicates April to stop her seizure.

2) Abigail attempts to keep peace between April and Brent

3) She attempts to fight off Brent as he tries to kill her, to no avail.

CHANGES: Beat 3 – Maybe Abigail tries to kill Brent because she can finally express her contempt for Brent/Abigail’s problem.

KERRY

BEGINNING: Looking for love/validation in a bar.

MIDDLE: Helps April find her father in exchange for research he can use.

END: He helps April discover her power

Character Broad Strokes

1) Kerry is flattered that April is trying to pick him up until he realizes she is trying to use him. But he goes along with it once he realizes she may help him get access to her father’s research.

2) Kerry gets fired.

3) Kerry helps April find Ayoki Koji because he may be able to help.

4) Kerry gets captured by the military with Ayoki and April and he’s tortured.

5) Kerry helps them find Dr. Gant.

6) Kerry is dead weight from here on until he gets killed.

CHANGES: New Beats –

Kerry helping April was a ruse that lead to them getting captured. So Beat 4 is split and beat 5 becomes Kerry confessing that he had to betray April to get directly to Gant.

Beat 6 becomes 7 and he’s studied Dr. Gant’s work, he can help April learn to use her abilities to redeem himself.

AYOKI

BEGINNING: He makes April buy him food for information, then refuses to give any.

MIDDLE: He threatens to kill April if she helped the military find him.

END: Koji sacrifices himself to save the group and hopefully the world.

Character Broad Strokes

1) Ayoki refuses to give April information about the secret program he was involved in. He wants nothing to do with society

2) He gets captured by the military with April and Kerry

3) Ayoki escapes his room to kill April for leading the military to him.

4) Ayoki helps to free everyone else, but learns from Dr. Gant that the longer he is with other clairvoyants involved with the program, including the beasts, he will transform into a beast as well.

5) Ayoki tries to escape with April and Kerry, but they find out from Gaskins that there are more creatures and the only person who could contain them was a strong clairvoyant like Dr. Gant. Ayoki volunteers to try.

6) Ayoki tries to stop the beasts, but he isn’t strong enough. His efforts only expedite his change.

7) Ayoki sacrifices himself to slow down the beasts while everyone else escapes.

CHANGES – None at this time.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by  Elliott Williams.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by  Elliott Williams.

[KAREN GRIFFIN]

Red Jam on Your Face – Piper’s Journey

1. Piper dreams of a unkept little girl who has a snake heading for her.

2. Piper wakes up from a nap

3. Piper walks into her office, her shoes clanking the floors. A co-worker complains loudly in front of the whole office about Piper’s walking in the hall.

4. Joel calls Piper. He tells her he is in their hometown. They talk about all of the hurtful things down to them brought on by peers…they talk about how the comments made their lives hard to live there.

5. Piper watches her co-workers leave in a group together. She tells Joel that she’s still left out of things.

6. Joel tells Piper that he’s going to go see her after his gig there. He doesn’t want to be her best friend anymore; he wants to be her boyfriend.

7. Piper gets a text from mom saying that she sent her an airplane ticket to come home. She’s reluctant but Joel’s there; so, she decides to go.

8. She goes to her closet and pulls down a suite case. A prayer card falls from her closet. She reads it. It’s the Guardian Angel prayer. She looks to Heaven and says she means it.

9. Sun gets bright. Silhouette hand touches her arm. Piper scratches her arm. Sees nothing on it or near her.

10. A woman smiles and waves at Piper. Piper waves back.

11. Piper gets home. She stops at a store to get a drink. Woman stops there, too. She calls Piper’s name. She says her name is Leela. She asks Piper about the town; says she needs kind of a tour guide. Piper is brief. Leela says that she can tell Piper is uneasy about this place…that she understands what it’s like to be an outsider. They become fast friends.

12. Piper runs into Mixie. Mixie’s demeanor is gloating and condescending towards Piper. Piper has a tough time being in Mixie’s presence but responds politely, which is undeserving for Mixie. Leela notes Piper’s behavior.

13. Piper calls Joel. No answer. She’s frustrated she can’t talk to Joel.

14. Piper tries to keep herself hidden from everyone. She notices everyone walking towards the Intracoastal Canal. Piper doesn’t want to go. Leela says that what happening down there is unavoidable.

15. They walk to the canal. Piper tries to be as inconspicuous as possible.

16. Mixie tells Corey that Piper is there. She whispers something into Corey’s ear. Corey checks out Piper a little. Piper sees all of this.

17. Mixie gives a big ‘hi’ to someone near Piper totally ignoring Piper’s presence.

18. Joel’s car is pulled out of the canal. Piper breaks down in tears and grief in front of everyone. All eyes turn to her.

19. Murmuring occurs. Piper sees this. She tells Leela that she wants to leave.

20. In Piper’s bedroom at her parents’ home, Piper tells Leela that she wants to leave. Leela asks Piper why she wants to leave. Piper says because no one likes her here and she doesn’t want to hear what anyone has to say about her or Joel and her. They are fake. She doesn’t trust anyone. The great divide. They threw Piper away a long time ago. Piper wants to run away.

21. Leela acknowledges Piper’s pain. Leela asks Piper what she really wants. Piper confesses that she wants to be loved, authentically. She wants to be valuable. She wants this dark cloud to move from her.

22. Leela tells Piper that she will take her to a place where Piper will get love and be very valuable. They go to a shelter.

23. Leela tells Piper that things are not going well for these people in the shelter; but a shelter is here because these people matter.

24. Piper talks to a person going through a rough patch but not giving up.

25. Piper attends a tea party. She sits with a group of women. They begin to gossip. Piper walks out.

26. Piper angrily walks to her car. Leela joins her. Leela tells Piper that things are about to get heavy. Piper asks how she knows this. Leela says to light, to guard, to rule, to guide. Piper is puzzled.

27. Piper and Leela are riding when Corey stands out in the road.

28. Leela says that she will handle this and she gets out of the car. Piper waits a minute, and she gets out of the car.

29. Piper watches others come out of the bushes of the Houma shortcut, including Mixie.

30. Corey asks Piper why is she here. Piper asks Corey the same question.

31. Piper tells everyone that they are nasty. They do awful things.

[Mary Andrews]

DAY 5: MARY J ANDREWS: ELEVATE YOUR CHARACTERS’ STORIES

( 1HR. PILOT PARANORMAL SCI FI )

WHAT I’VE LEARNED: To separate the pilot arcs from the series arcs.

1) PROTAGONIST Rael Pointe

B E G I N N I N G: Rael fends off an attack when Ambassador is delivered to Nemesis on Tanivol.

M I D D L E: Rael adds Tristen to his team to help save ambassador and hunt for psychic terrorists.

E N D: Rael’s Mother (Head of Dark Ops) is on death bed and he realises he is in the cross-hairs

2) ANTAGONIST T.L. Harbringer The Corporate Overlord/master of the Hive Workforce Planet A Chosen One of the Oracles, he runss “the psychic terrorists” Rael is seeking

B E G I N N I N G: always in the background, he orchestrates the Tanivol attack on Nemesis

M I D D L E: he lures Rael to capture Tristen

END: he has Rael’s mother poisoned

3) CONNECTING CHARACTER Tristen: A Chosen One of the Oracles. mission: to save her world.

B E G I N N I N G: Tristen is enslaved and used to mind-jack the ambassador to bait Rael to find her.

M I D D L E: Rael’s team capture Tristen and Ira rewrites her mind, placing her under Rael’s command.

E N D

4) SUPPORTING CHARACTER FOR PROTAGONIST Ira Haze Laynald Lockheim

B E G I N N I N G: Ira Haze is youngest of crew early 20’s has paranormal powers and training but team mates treat him like a child and out of loyalty he takes it, but does not like it….he discovers the ambassador is being controlled by someone who is being used as a ocnduit for torture.

M I D D L E: To save his captain from being controlled by Tristen, he rewrites her mind, forcing her to become Rael’s slave, but it does not sit well with him…he has now become the same as those who enslaved him at the Wall and killed his mother.

E N D: Ira begins to enjoy working with Tristen and is guilty about having rewritten her mind.

4) SUPPORTING CHARACTER FOR PROTAGONIST Laynald Lockheim / Ira Haze

B E G I N N I N G: Laynald sees himself as a mentor because of his age and as a protector…he strives to protect during attack

M I D D L E: Laynald is suspicious of Tristen’s loyalty

E N D:

5) SUPPORTING CHARACTER FOR ANTAGONIST Tristen / Mallory Switt / T.L. Harbringer / The Oracles

B E G I N N I N G: TRISTEN allows herself to be used as a slave and follows the path the Oracles have foreseen.

M I D D L E: She becomes involved with the Nemesis team and Ira.

E N D: she will do the captain’s bidding and prove her worth to the team and Ira will become sympathetic.

I’m still having trouble with the opening. It is hard to present a display of Rael’s Compu-link and make it interesting…maybe I should jump ahead

and have him flash searching ads being broadcasted to ships on Tonivol (it’s a pleasure planet) maybe have the ads interrupt his business call. Hmm.

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[Mary Chamberlin]

Mary and Rich’s Character Story Beats

What we learned in this exercise is reflection and immersion in the characters allows us to make sure they sync well with the overall genre, plot, logline, and structure.

Protagonist/Antagonist 1 – Morty

Role – Gen X Protagonist, laid off now student

Core Character Traits – Adventurous, Optimistic Pessimist, Secretive, Fatherly (Note irony of simultaneously secretive and adventurous)

Character Subtext Logline – doesn’t feel old yet constantly mentions age, may have waited too long to pursue his dreams

Want/Need: to accomplish something even if it is short-term

Character Arc: friendless to family

Secret: He has a lot of creative ideas, but uneven priorities

What makes this character unique? Never gives up, teasing dry sense of humor

BEGIN – Morty returns to school, gets paired up with his polar opposite

MIDDLE – He dips his toe in dating and social media, trying to escape his secret loneliness

END – Morty stands up for what he believes, in the process finds new avenues/relationships

Broad Strokes –

Laid off and alone, he returns to school only to be rebuffed for his age

His secret (profound loss) conflicts with Jax’s (fight for freedom) – they are locked into their secrets

Morty takes to Kyle, releasing his inner pain about the loss of his wife and child in an accident and gives him a family again

Has trouble relating to a GenZ using GenX methods (home phone, text msg, drive around, etc) until Jax gets him to try a dating app and social media. He likes them, grows him out of his secret and plunges him forward with life

IDEA – Specify “In the near future” All cars are EV (except Mabel) – can also season with a couple futuristic twists.

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Protagonist/Antagonist 2 – Jax (each others Antagonist here)

Role – Gen Z Protagonist, punk loner, wishes to be elsewhere

Core Character Traits – loner, withdrawn, mellow, too nice to be ambitious

Character Subtext Logline – is at heart an old soul, trying to let go of anger to find peace, doesn’t like attention, yet has notable tattoos

Want/Need: to feel accepted and appreciated

Unique: is very even-keeled

Character Arc: scattered boy to responsible man

Improvements: change withdrawn to Fidgety, mellow to Justice seeking

BEGIN – Withdrawn and forced to attend school, he begrudgingly starts work on a project that he becomes interested in thru and despite Morty

MIDDLE – In helping Morty, he helps himself open up to Melanie and his father (so not financially blackmailed)

END – Forced to accept truths and reject lies, he steps up to become the man he wants to be with the life he desires

Broad Strokes –

Punk facade shields Jax from people, except Morty, Kyle and Melanie.

He is smart and begins their screenplay on solid footing – a space adventure

Jealous of Kyle’s infatuation with Morty, he is chided by Melanie and steps back to look at himself

Angered by Morty dating Melanie’s Mom, again he is trying to be something he is not.

He opens up to Melanie and Morty and completes the project – even though it fails, it leads to something better.

IDEA – Jax is creative on design and sets, so perhaps a THEATER PLAY would be a better project here.

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Connecting character – Bella Bustamonte

Role – Teacher and Love Interest

Core Character Traits – air force grunt, direct, sexy mature, tough love

Character Subtext Logline – Although teaching kids, she doesn’t understand them well, tries boot camp learning method

Want/Need – to help create winning screenwriters, to live the military life

Secret – Thinks of herself as a Military Hemingway, finds Morty attractive even in his feeble attempts to date her

What makes this character unique? Called a ballbuster, she’s really a strong woman who gets what she needs

BEGIN – Tough teacher tries to relate to young students (from GenX perspective) and mostly fails

MIDDLE – She’s more than we thought – she’s Air Force Reserve and still flies. Won’t date students.

END – She doesn’t pick “YARD WARS” but after class ends begins to date Morty

Broad Strokes –

Stays pretty much the same across story

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Supporting character for Protagonist – Melanie

Role – Gen Z BFF and love interest

Core Character Traits – sweet, quiet strength, loyal and composed, also an old soul like Jax

Character Subtext Logline – Stomped by the world, she is happy with her world including her precious but vulnerable Kyle

Want/Need – to live her life in peace and love with a little more stability

Secret – protective of her Mom who also has been kicked around

BEGIN – Appears to be a parasite, but she is NOT

MIDDLE – She aids Jax in loosening up his anger and judgement

END – She returns his love and takes them to the next level

Broad Strokes –

Accepts help from Jax willingly, even as she provides friendship to Jax unconditionally

Her nurture instinct for Kyle is fulfilled when Jax professes his love and she recoprocates

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Supporting character for Antagonist – Kyle

Role – child to be fathered by Morty and Jax

Core Character Traits – Precocious, direct, moody, adventurous

Character Subtext Logline – Opposite of Jax still sharing many traits

Flaw – Epileptic fits haunt his life

Want/Need – to be normal, to fly

Secret – wishes he could have two Dads and one Mom

BEGIN – Playful

MIDDLE – Ashamed

END – Boldly moves forward

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Supporting – Benny Arnold (Jax’s Dad)

Role – Antagonist

Core Character Traits – In the box, Money-focussed, Prestige motivated, Cold

Character Subtext Logline – If Jax doesn’t release his anger he’ll be just like his Dad in the end

BEGIN – pesty and demanding

MIDDLE – uncompromising

END – abashed by Jax refusal and Morty shaming