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Day 6 Assignment
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12 Replies
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David’s Mystery Sequence
“What I learned is…?” It is still difficult for me to distinguish secret, coverup and mystery from each other. Especially, when they can apply to different characters who are interacting with each other. It seems clear in the examples and the lesson, but when the script is still amorphous, not so. Are there transitions, scenes and/or actions that are neither?
What is the big secret that the Villain is covering up?
In his insane, perverted mind, the Villain needs to find the Santa Elena and recover the treasure to reestablish the Spanish Inquisition from his present Cult.
How many ways can they cover that secret? Those become the mysteries.
Maintain the unquestioning obedience of the Cult fanatics.
Remove potential threats to the Cult and the goals.
Spy on a family that may have a map to the treasure.
Force some in the family to reveal what they know by direct or indirect force.
Find and steal the map.
Follow the map-holders to the treasure.
Plant Cult fanatics among the map holders.
The first mystery must engage the Hero into solving it.
Paul’s parish priest is sacrificed on the altar of his church. There is evidence of a dozen people involved. Evidence left behind implicated Paul’s Uncle Jack. He has an alibi. Then Jack disappears with foul play evident. Paul becomes involved.
Sequence the mysteries so that each one leads us to the next one. Include ONE Red Herring mystery if you can.
MAIN MYSTERIES.
A. Will Paul ever become assertive?
B. Why was the priest sacrificed?
C. What happened to Jack?
D. Why would a cool girl like Sandy like a nerd like Paul?
E. Who is following Paul?
F. What is the history of the treasure?
G. What is the secret of the map?
H. Who will recover the treasure?
Create a Mystery Chain for each main mystery.
Will Paul ever become assertive?
· Paul bullied. Avoids conflict. Feels loss of father.
· Becomes concerned about priest’s murder.
· Investigates Jack’s disappearance.
· Threatened by other students.
· Meets Sandy.
· Being followed. Confronts person.
· Neighbor killed near him.
· Jack returns.
· Paul learns about map and history.
· Paul organizes treasure hunt.
· Sabotages Cult boat.
· Begins treasure salvage.
· Fights for his life.
· Overcomes his fears to win.
· Gets Sandy.
· A final act of assertiveness.
Why was the priest sacrificed?
· Coordinated attacks on Paul and family.
· Cultists
· Slaughter of apostate family.
· Map history.
· Paul’s mother kidnapped.
· Final attack of piracy.
What happened to Jack?
· Priest killed.
· Foul play and disappearance.
· Meets Lenny in a bar and enlists him in the treasure hunt.
· Man following Paul.
· Jack returns.
· History of the map.
Why would a cool girl like Sandy like a nerd like Paul?
· Sandy is a good-looking, social girl. Paul loves books.
· Paul is told Sandy is from a family connected with the Cultists.
· Sandy’s father was associated with the death of Paul’s father.
· Did Sandy lure Paul into a trap of Cultists?
What is the secret of the map?
· How can the study of history lead to a solution?
Who will recover the treasure?
· Paul’s friends are outmanned and outgunned.
· There may be a Cult plant with the treasure hunters.
· How can Paul win when all his friends are drugged and he is held at gunpoint?
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I had some of the exact same revelations doing this assignment, David. The differences between secrets, cover-ups, and mysteries were finally made clear to me. I experienced several ah-ha moments that prompted me to go back to redo my homework twice to make sure I understood the impact of cover-ups for each mystery. It wasn’t as clear before for me. It’s certainly a challenge to go in with a script already, and my lesson answers for this may still change as we move forward in the course.
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It looks like several people had the same problem. I had to go over the lesson several times to get, even, a working facility. Also, the script is one I have been working off and on, mostly off, for several years. I realized it was a drama that now needs to be changed to a thriller. So, I have to think new and rethink old. Poor Sandy, she was an open, affectionate girl and now she is a treacherous bitch, maybe.
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Noree’s Mystery Sequence
This assignment was challenging for me because I’m going back into a script with an opportunity to correct it, and so I believe it’s harder to reshape something finished than rebuild it. You have to break a lot of patterns that you were set in, and for me, I realized the areas where I was stuck in my rewrite were due to elements that were presented in this assignment. It was a huge revelation to be shown, plainly, how to build mysteries from a big secret and in my script, and that there are places where the mystery needs to be clearer. I also was mixing up secrets and mysteries at times in my thought processes before this lesson; as well as pointing too much to the villains early on and not fully utilizing cover-ups. This was great, and challenging.
What is
the big secret that the Villain is covering up?•Dr. Morado is holding an
entire neighborhood in bondage to exploit their genetic immunity.How
many ways can they cover that secret? Those become the mysteries.•Who killed Raven’s parents?
•What is Marcus hiding?
•Who are the people of
Neighborhood H?•Is Hermetix responsible for
years of medical death and torture?Create
a Mystery Chain for each main mystery.
Mystery 1: Who killed Raven’s Parents?
•Raven
injected them with a substance, did she mean to kill them?•Lenny
is Raven’s parents’ pharmacist, legally and illegally – what about him?•Raven
doesn’t communicate with her coworkers for weeks after the death.•Raven
is willing to break the law when it benefits her.•Raven is kidnapped in the subway tunnels by “vagrants”
Mystery 2: What Is Marcus Hiding?
•Marcus
does everything Dr. Morado tells him to do.•Marcus
shows up at Raven’s house unannounced.•Marcus
finds algae residue on Raven’s chair and pockets it.•Marcus
is seen talking to the driver of the body dump van.•Raven
discovers evidence of Neighborhood H on Marcus’ laptop.Mystery 3: Who Are the People of Neighborhood H?
•They
are terrified of outsiders•Raven’s
dad is a descendant, how did he get on “the outside”?•They
are non-reactive about the gruesome body dumps.•Some
are privy to a network of underground tunnels where others live.•They
are all immune to disease and the effects of climate change.Mystery 4: Is Hermetix Responsible for Years of Medical Death and Torture?
•Hermetix
began as a research hospital for women’s reproductive issues.•Dr.
Morado is leading the charge to help humanity overcome the recent changes
in the water supply.•Hermetix
is a world renown research institution.•Hermetix
is releasing a gene therapy protocol that will stop people from dying
from the water, soil, crater leakage, and toxic algae. -
Gledé’s Mystery Sequence
Mystery 1: Who framed Shelby for murder?
* A mysterious stranger stalks Shelby and threatens the lives of her children if she tells anyone about him.
* Why does the stranger know so many details about Shelby’s life?
* The stalker communicates with Shelby’s teenage daughter, Abbie.
* Shelby has been keeping secrets from her family about her past. Her stalker could be someone who has a problem with her.
* Shelby makes a strange move. Though bail is granted at her hearing, she tells her husband Jason not to pay. Why is she willing to go to jail? Does she know who’s behind the frame and why?
* The stalker sends a note to Shelby in Jail, telling her to cooperate or else… The note includes a hand drawn image of two coffins with Shelby’s children’s name on each.
* Shelby and her supporters deduce the stalker must be the culprit but who is he and why did he target Shelby?
Mystery 2: What is Shelby hiding?
* Her affair with Alessandro Rossi, the murder victim.
* Her family didn’t die in a fire when she was a teenager, as she told her husband and children.
* She provided funds and resources to help Alessandro Rossi leave the country with his daughters to escape their abusive mother, but he was killed before he could leave.
* That she was being stalked and harassed before she went to jail
Mystery 3: Who is Mia Lansing?
* Jason and his investigator fly to Kenner, LA to find out more about Mia Lansing, Shelby’s childhood friend. A woman named Betty tells them Mia was her daughter and she’s dead.
* Believing it’s Mia Lansing on the other end of the line, Koczak says he needs to speak to her urgently and they should meet. Jason shows up at the appointed time and learns that Mia Lansing is a green-eyed blonde who enlisted Koczak’s help to frame Shelby.
* Jason is baffled, because Betty Lansing from Kenner, LA is a black woman and said her daughter Mia was dead.
* Shelby’s lawyer visits her in jail with the good news; Koczak confirmed that a woman named Mia Lansing was behind the frame. Shelby knows this can’t be true because she is Mia Lansing.
Mystery 4: Does Vivian know who framed Shelby for murder?
* When the police visit Koczak to take his statement about Mia being the mastermind behind framing Shelby, they find his dead body.
* Jason discovers a listening device inside one of the crystal swans he gave Shelby as an anniversary present.
* Shelby’s daughter, Abbie, finds prescription pills written out to Mia Lansing in the guest bedroom of the family home.
* Jason’s PI follows Vivian one day when she goes shopping; she ends up at a secret apartment instead.
* The PI stakes out the apartment; a blonde woman walks past him and smirks in his direction.
* Shelby confesses to Jason that she is Mia Lansing. Jason is puzzled by the fact that Vivian sent him on a wild goose chase to LA in search of Mia Lansing. She had to have known that Shelby was the real Mia Lansing.
* A mysterious man shows up at the Cooper residence, claiming to be Mia Lansing’s brother, Michael.
RED HERRING – Mehmet Koczak
1. Koczak wants revenge against Shelby because she ratted him out for corporate espionage when they were both scientists at the same biotech company.
2. He lost everything; his career, reputation and family and now sees an opportunity for a comeback/get even.
3. He warns Abbie, Shelby’s teenage daughter in an anonymous note that something bad is about to happen; he implies that Shelby is a deceiver and must pay for her sins.
4. Warns Abbie that if she reveals their communication, he’ll come after the rest of the family.
5. Shelby receives a Christmas card in prison. Emma Chan, her post-doctoral fellow is one of the signers. It jogs Shelby’s memory that Emma mentioned running into Koczak who asked questions about Shelby.
6. Koczak now becomes the prime suspect.
7. He calls the villain, but Jason picks up instead. Jason extracts details from him about his involvement in framing Shelby and the real mastermind, Mia Lansing.
8. Koczal wasn’t the killer. The real killer killed him.
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Rachelle’s Mystery Sequence
What I learned is… This lesson was such a puzzle! I definitely overthink assignments, which makes it take longer to complete. I honestly agonized over this, which I wish I hadn’t. The brainstorming is fun, but I become frustrated. Once I decide that I just NEED TO GET IT DONE it all falls into place. I had to let go of a lot of the previous drama layout I had done for this story.
1. The big secret Xander is covering up is his own history with the Bardot family (Cyn and Jules) and the fact that he purposefully inserted himself into Jules’ life to take advantage of their family’s misfortune to cash in on the inheritance he was sure Jules would receive on her mother’s passing. His biggest secret is his sociopathic, con-man nature.
2. He covers his secrets by not having interactions with both sisters at once. Cyn knew him as Alex back in high school, Jules knows him as Xander; they would not automatically assume he is the same person. He is able to pit the sisters against each other through manipulation. Whatever else he does relies on the fact that people do not really know who he is or where to find him.
3. The first mystery that engages the hero (Cyn) is why her mother made her executor of her will when Jules was the one who stayed behind to take care of her.
4. Mystery sequences with RED HERRING…
Xander casually bumps into Jules, she doesn’t recognize him (or does she), and he pursues a relationship with her.
When her mother keeps hanging on despite her illness, Xander encourages Jules to steal drugs from the hospital where she works; to ease her mother’s suffering.
Jules will appear guilty (RED HERRING) whether she gives her mother the drugs or not.
After her mother’s passing Jules becomes furious that she must contact Cyn to execute the will. She both envies and idolizes her – Cyn is the one who got out of the small town to make a name for herself while Jules stayed home to be ‘good’ and take care of their mother.
Because of her jealousy, Jules will try to sabotage Cyn’s happiness and livelihood.
Both sisters will be dating Xander/Alex simultaneously without knowing it.
Cyn is fed up but won’t give Jules the satisfaction of handing it over to her, so she gives it all to Alex/Xander so she can go back to L.A. with a clean conscious.
During the final sister show-down they will realize that they have been dating the same man and he has played them both. The RED HERRING reveal. Then they can go after Xander together.
5. Mystery Chains:
The main mystery is the death of Cyn and Jules’ mother. Why did she leave everything to Cyn and did she die of natural causes (her disease)?
Jules was the clear heir, did their mother know something Cyn doesn’t?
Jules has access to lethal drugs, did she end their mother’s life early?
Jules harbors a hatred for Cyn, did she call her back just to torment her?
Jules does whatever she can to make Cyn’s life a living hell.
Mystery 2: What is Jules hiding?
She’s dating Cyn’s ex (though she appears clueless of the fact)
Engagement and pregnancy?
Mystery 3: Who is Xander/Alex?
Both women talk of this man whom they know intimately, but the three have never been in the same room at the same time.
(Audience may know before the women figure out who he is). Does this ruin the thriller element?
Mystery 4: Did Jules end her mother’s life early to cash in on an inheritance she thought was hers?
Jules is sad, lonely, desperate. Was she looking for this as her way out?
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Leo’s Mystery Sequence
What I learned is that I don’t have a big enough mystery and excitement at the beginning. I will need to come up with that.
1 – What is the big secret that the Villain is covering up?
He knows Matt’s father and wants to find him so he can kill him.
2 – How many ways can they cover that secret and 4 – Sequence:
Hank volunteers to help Matt – Mystery 1: Where is Luke?
Hide his relationship to Luke – Mystery 2: Who is Hank?
Hank blames Luke for his own crimes (Red Herring)
Hank doesn’t want any police blowing his cover – Mystery 3: Why no police?
Pretend he is a fan of Matt’s work – Mystery 4: Why does Hank know so much?
Hank thinks Bill know too much – Mystery 5: What happened to Bill?
3 – The first mystery must engage the Hero into solving it.
Mystery 1: Where is Luke? – Matt must find his dad, Luke, in order to save his own life.
5 – Create a Mystery Chain for each main mystery.
Mystery 1: Where is Luke?
— Lies about Luke breaking the law
— Lie about his background and his injuries.
Mystery 2: Who is Hank?
— Pretend to not know anything about Matt’s background.
— Create an incident that “makes him change his mind” and agree to help Matt.
Mystery 3: Why no police?
— Lies about wanting to protect Luke from unfair prosecution
— Convince Matt not to involve the police in trying to find his dad.
Mystery 4: Why does Hank know so much?
— Recruit people to infiltrate Luke’s survivalist group.
— Kill the recruit and make it look like Luke did it.
Mystery 5: What happened to Bill?
— Try to get rid of Bill, so Matt is totally dependent on him.
— Train Matt to overcome the obstacles Luke has set up to protect his hermit camp.
— Arrange the final meeting so he can first kill Matt in front of Luke, then kill Luke.
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Michael’s Mystery Sequence
<div>What I learned “I have to stop and ask myself what was the secret, what constitutes the coverup, keeping the nomenclature straight requires work.</div><div>
1] What is the big secret that the Villain is covering up? Jim wants the engraving plates that Luke, Dino’s father, has hidden before going to prison. Jim uses Dino as leverage.
[2] How many ways can they cover that secret? These become the mysteries. Through
[3] The first mystery must engage the Hero into solving it. Dino is being framed for the murder of his teacher. He has to solve it or face being charged with murder!
[4] Sequence the mysteries so that each one leads us to the next one.
Mystery Chain for mystery number one: (a) Cindy was brutally murdered in her bed, in a locked and alarmed home, begs the question how; (b) The initial suspect, the husband, was out of town at a continuing education conference; (c) Whoever killed her, knew the alarm code, knew the layout of the house; or knew how to bypass security measures (d)
[5] Include ONE Red Herring mystery. Red Herring is the school janitor, Jake Porter. He has a history of stalking and assault, so he initially fits the profile. Plus, he doesn’t have an alibi for the night of the murder. Additionally, he has photos of Cindy on his Camera in his locker at school.
Secret (1): Jim murders Cindy, Dino’s teacher. It is not shown, just reported after the fact.
Cover up (1): The murder is gruesome, personal and points to a lover/intimate familiar.
Secret (2): Jim starts sending the police detectives clues pointing to Dino as the killer
Cover up (2): Jim wins over one of the detectives & a police chief who wants case closed
Secret (3): Jim hates Dino’s father & threatens to finish framing Dino unless he gets plates
Cover up (3): Jim sidles up to the police chief & acts like a concerned parent re: Dino.
Secret (4): Jim finds and murders Leah, the detective, helping Dino to catch him.
Cover
up (4): Jim calls in the murder, tells the Chief that Dino did it and where he
is.</div> -
Sophia Banks- I learned that the cover up and secret are very important to the story.
1 That he controls this whole dark web and the Kin feed is a cover for it, and he is responsisble for Ryan sister murder. And that he himself is so afraid of living and of death that he doesnt do anything.
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1 SECRET Villian murder Ryan sister in a thrill paid for by wealthy people.
COVER UP. it was an accidental killing by the mob boss.
2 Secret- Ryan flat mate, Jack was getting to close to the murder.
Cover up- Villian trying to frame murder on Ryan by killing his boss.
3 Secret 3 Who set Ryan up?
Cover up? Send in paid police to tell him it was the mob boss- red herring.
Secret- Ryan discovers the Mob boss works for someone.
Cover-up? Send in Assasins to try and kill him and take him out.
Secret- Ryan discovers that the Villian thread comes from kin-feed.
Cover-up – Have the web start attacking him and point him to another villain who was fired- elon muk type.
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Linda’s Mystery Sequence
What I learned doing this assignment is starting with the secret and creating the cover up made plotting the mysteries so much easier and clearer. It’s amazing how engrossing and complicated / confusing a thriller can seem, but when layed out using this approach they are really very simple.
What is the
big secret that the Villain is covering up?Vittorio Genovese is taking over the Philadelphia mob.
How many
ways can they cover that secret? Those become the mysteries.Secret: The villain is taking over the Philly mob and will bring it to prominence again.
Cover Up: The villain convinces the hero and the community, it’s the only way to keep the streets safe.
Secret: Eliminates current mob boss and biggest rival.
Cover Up: Gets the police to kill the current mob boss and rival.
Secret: Has community call 9-1-1 to report an impending mob hit.
Cover Up: Leaks info of impending mob hit.
Secret: Sets hero up for a crime.
Cover Up: Convinces hero it’s the right thing to do to save his family.
Secret: Is behind the threats to the hero’s family.
Cover Up: Offers to help the hero and takes action to that effect.
Secret: Can’t have the police investigate.
Cover Up: Plays on his experience as prosecutor to give hero reason to keep quiet about the threats.
Secret: Is stalking the hero.
Cover Up: Is with the hero when he gets some of the stalking messages.
Secret: Going to push hero to give up prosecuting to be his consigliere.
Cover Up: Befriends hero.
The first
mystery must engage the Hero into solving it.The hero is stalked and threatened.
Sequence the
mysteries so that each one leads us to the next one. Include ONE Red
Herring mystery if you can.Mystery #1: Who is stalking Leo?
Mystery #2: Who wants Leo to quit his job and why?
Mystery #3: What is Vittorio hiding?
Mystery #4: Who set up Leo?
Mystery #5: Who will take over the Philly mob?
Create a
Mystery Chain for each main mystery.Mystery #1: Who is stalking Leo?
· He’s a prosecutor – red herring is a defendant
· “Code” cited for why they won’t go after his wife and daughter
· Mob hit and Antonio insinuates Leo is going to let him go
· Stalking paused while Antonio in custody
· Leo receives a message from the mob
Mystery #2: Who wants Leo to quit his job and why?
· Threats to get him to quit his job as investigations into mob heat up
· Antonio cocky, doesn’t say he isn’t the stalker
· Something related to stalking find on Antonio
· Vittorio points him toward someone in Antonio’s organization
Mystery #3: What is Vittorio hiding?
· Returns from a trip to Italy
· Dodges questions about his trip
· Shady about his job
· Run into a woman who mentions he’s no longer at company where Leo thought he still worked
· Tells Leo he has something bigger in the works, but can’t tell him yet
Mystery #4: Who set up Leo?
· Gets a text from Antonio to meet him
· Turns out to not be from Antonio
· One of Antonio’s men told Leo is coming after him
· Someone tipped the cops off
· Leo backed into a corner where he has to kill Antonio or he will kill him
Mystery #5: Who is going to takeover the mob?
· Vittorio poses the question when Antonio still alive
· Vittorio discusses the protection the mob afforded the community and the lack of it now due to Antonio’s failings
· Leo says if Antonio falls that will be the end of the Philly mob
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Gordon’s Mystery Sequence
What I learned: The villain’s secret drives the mystery.
What is the big secret that the Villain is covering up?
First Secret
Murder.
Cover up of First Secret:
A catastrophic collapse of a building kills hundreds.
The first mystery engaging the Hero into solving it:
Gwen’s mother, a tenant, perishes in the building with hundreds more.
Sequence of mystery chain engaging the hero re. the First Secret:
Jeb Briar just bought the building a few months back. From Day One of his ownership he’s hired teams to inspect it and determine how best to renovate the building, to resolve its dilapidated state and to keep all tenants in place without raising rents.
News media idolizes him. Tenants cling to him in gratitude for his contribution to help them survive. He’s a respected guy in the public’s eye.
His stated mission is to avoid contributing to the community’s already significant homeless problem and instead, help in some fashion to reduce it. That’s why he’s renovating, not tearing it down like others have who tore down old apartments and replaced them with new, highly sought after high rise condominiums while adding further to the homeless population.
The building collapses. It’s an event that causes the world to pause. Hundreds are killed.
Enter Gwen. She’s devastated with the loss of her mother in the collapse. But to survive she must keep working. To support her bereavement, with her company’s permission, she downloads files from her assigned project to work at home while she copes with her loss.
Following a quick investigation the former owner of the building is arrested. The inspection team determines the collapse is due to years of negligent maintenance. The former owner is charged with numerous counts of negligent homicide.
Gwen is a talented internet security analyst. Her company is in the business of reducing security threats from cyber and ransomware attacks. As it turns out the newly assigned project involves Jeb’s group of companies.
Jeb discovers that someone, somehow, may have confidential files relative to his private life and also of the building. He doesn’t know if this person knows what they have. Nonetheless the materials are sensitive, revealing and devastating to him.
Jeb hires someone to track the documents and do what is necessary to return them.
Gwen unwittingly has Jeb’s private material. Therein lies the truth that Jeb doesn’t give a shit about the homeless. In fact he’s intentionally sabotaged the building to make it appear that its collapse was due to the prior owner’s years of neglect.
In fact Jeb needs to be permanently rid of the lot so he can rebuild just like the others, to make a huge profit.
Jeb also paid for the inspection teams that determined that the former owner’s neglect was the cause of the collapse.
All secrets of Jeb’s relative to the building are in these documents.
The race is on between Gwen’s discovery of what she has of Jeb’s, and with Jeb who must retrieve the documents at all costs and eliminate her before he’s found out.
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0Create your mystery sequence. Give us the answer to these questions.
What is the big secret that the Villain is covering up?
The gynecologist wants the baby for himself to give it to a disturbed pedophile network. He blackmailed them, but they turned it around and demanded a baby. They are influential people and capable of making him disappear. They will kill the girl when it’s all over.
How many ways can they cover that secret? Those become the mysteries.
· What is the billionaire couple doing with all these young girls? And why is she treated differently than the other girls?
· Why is she still pregnant?
· Why is the gynecologist helping her escape?
· Who are the people that are after the gynecologist?
· Why isn’t her stepfather looking for her?
· RED HERRING HOUSEKEEPERS?
The first mystery must engage the Hero into solving it.Sequence the mysteries so that each one leads us to the next one. Include ONE Red Herring mystery if you can.Create a Mystery Chain for each main mystery.Answer the question “What I learned is…?” and put it at the top of your assignment.Create the end goal of the Villain. What are they trying to accomplish or stop that is so valuable that they’ll go to any means to achieve the goal?
· Gynecologist wants the baby for himself to give it to disturbed pedophile network. He blackmailed them, but they turned it around and demand a baby. They are powerful people and capable to have him disappear. They will kill the girl when it’s all over.
Look for how the Villain might execute the plan. What would need to take place to make that plan happen in a covert way? Brainstorm devious, dangerous, covert, and even disturbing ways your Villain could make all of this could happen.
· He doesn’t perform an abortion on the girl.
· He lies to the billionaire couple about his motives.
· He blackmails the girl’s stepfather: don’t report her missing otherwise I’ll go to the police tell them you sexually abused your stepdaughter.
· He abducts the girl when she runs away. He chases her. She falls so hard; she loses the child.
· Now he wants to kill her.
How can the villain’s plan and their actions be covered up?
· He lies about the abortion; she will find out she’s pregnant when it’s too late.
· He lies to the billionaire couple about his motives
· He tells the girl the billionaire couple are villains and that they have forced him not to perform the abortion. She must trust him. The couple are villains because they are abusing young girls. But they do want to have the baby.
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