Day 6 Assignments

[Janeen Johnson]

Janeen’s Ready for Critique!

The Empowerment Guild – Drama

Synopsis:

Morgan Day wants very much to be more than the trophy wife of a famous writer. To empower herself, she learns the Waterman Method, a form of mind control that can be used on herself or others. Her favorite couture designer abuses his wife, Amber, who Morgan knows. The wife asks for her help, but won’t press charges against her husband and the result is a restraining order against Morgan for the designer and his family.

Still determined to help Amber, Morgan begins using the Waterman Method to empower Amber to act to save herself and her kids. Morgan enlists the help of her fiber guild members who include a police officer, women’s shelter owner, family law lawyer, and ER nurse. As Morgan empowers other women in the shelter they begin fighting back against their abusers. Amber, after one too many beatings, kills her husband. Her defense team uses Morgan and the guild’s “help” as part of her defense and the prosecutor files charges against the guild members for incitement to murder. Amber’s case is ruled self-defense and the prosecutor can’t prove that the Waterman Method is any more than thoughts and prayers, not something he can prosecute.

MY FIRST TEN PAGES

INT. STRETCH LIMO – NIGHT

Inside a stretch limo, the occupants run the gamut from languid daydreamer to frenzied couture designer.

MORGAN DAY, resplendent, concentrating, stares into the evening traffic of the city, seemingly oblivious to the conversation in the limo, but secretly steeling herself to show them all.

DANIEL RICHARDS, fashion designer extraordinaire, a delighted smile glued to his face, kneels on the floor of the limo, furiously working to hem, tack, fluff, and primp a dress he has hastily designed for the WOMAN opposite Morgan in the limo.

The woman flutters and delights in Richard’s attention to her dress while her husband, a BOOK EDITOR, is focused only on the man across from him, GAVIN DAY.

Gavin Day, fifteen years Morgan’s senior, a combination of George Clooney and James Bond, chats with his editor. He is superior to everyone in the limo, perhaps in the world.

GAVIN

Having a beautiful woman by my side makes me feel complete, alive. You must feel it too.

The editor looks at Morgan.

Gavin, eyebrows raised, looks at Daniel and the editor’s wife.

The editor winces, quickly looking at his own wife.

EXT. STRETCH LIMO – NIGHT

The limo stops next to a red carpet. Reporters press in.

GAVIN gets out, helps MORGAN out of the limo. She is elegant, serene, benevolent, and all eyes are on her.

Cameras flash, videographers jockey for position. Questions are rapid fire, she has no time to answer before the next one tumbles over it.

REPORTER 1

Ms. Day, when did you know you had such extraordinary powers?

REPORTER 2

Now that you’ve solved child poverty in the U.S., when will you turn your powers to world hunger? That will surely be next, right?

Morgan nods, smiles, aglow. Gavin fades out of the camera flashes, part of the backdrop.

REPORTER 3

You’re the honoree tonight. How does that feel?

REPORTER 1

Have you heard from the President?

REPORTER 2

Has the head of UNICEF contacted you about extending your work into children’s health?

REPORTER 3

There are rumors you’ll be getting the Nobel this year.

REPORTER 1

Will you be asking the public to assist in these efforts? So many people want to help. A word from you…

CUT TO:

EXT. STRETCH LIMO – NIGHT

The driver opens the limo door, this time for real. Morgan exits the limo onto the red carpet.

She smiles, dazzling in the perfect dress. Cameras snap, but reporters wait silently.

Gavin follows her out of the limo. Reporters shout questions, jockey for position.

REPORTER 1

Gavin, your latest book has turned the business world upside down. What’s next?

REPORTER 2

You’re being honored tonight, is a Pulitzer next?

Gavin smiles modestly, shakes his head slightly, everyone knows the Pulitzer is in the bag.

REPORTER 3

What about a Nobel?

Gavin signals for quiet.

GAVIN

Please, please, thank you for your questions. I’m here tonight to enjoy the gala. We’ll have a press conference tomorrow morning and I’ll answer all of your questions, including what’s next for me. My editor will give you the details.

Most of the reporters clamor for the cards the BOOK EDITOR is handing out like candy. The editor’s WIFE smiles proudly in her Daniel Richards original. No one notices her.

Daniel, sweaty and exhausted, climbs off his knees and into a seat in the limo. He pours himself a bourbon as the driver closes the limo door.

A reporter nods toward Morgan, next to Gavin.

REPORTER 1

Is this your daughter, Mr. Day?

GAVIN

No, no. This is my wife, Morgan, the light of my life. Doesn’t she look beautiful tonight?

He smiles proudly, drawing the reporters attention to Morgan’s head to toe visual perfection with a sweep of his arm.

Morgan smiles, looks up at Gavin with appropriate awe. She is the perfect trophy wife.

EXT. RICHARDS HOME – EVENING

DANIEL RICHARDS, early 40s, fashion designer extraordinaire, now sweaty, exhausted, and half lit, lowers the window of the stretch limo when it stops at the gates of his posh home.

He takes a phone call while punching in his code. He is solicitous and caring.

DANIEL

Lola, dear, it is wonderful to hear from you. Your dress fits perfectly, right?

LOLA

It’s lovely, but there is a problem — nothing big, but I’m sure you can fix it before the awards show on Thursday.

Daniel has concern on his face and helpful conciliation in his voice as the limo pulls into the circle drive.

DANIEL

Whatever is wrong, my dear?

LOLA

Terrence has picked a different tie. You’ll have to re-dye my dress – and the shoes and clutch, of course, but you should have plenty of time – it’s three days.

(triumphantly)

You’ll be delighted to know I’m wearing diamonds so I won’t have to change my jewelry.

Daniel’s hand pulses on the door handle, strangling it over and over as the limo pulls up in front of his house. Brightly, calmly, he responds.

DANIEL

That’s wonderful. What color is the new tie?

LOLA

Green. A lovely shade. I’m sure you can match it.

Daniel clenches his teeth, but his voice is still smooth and sweet.

DANIEL

Yes, Lola, dear. I’m sure I can match it. Send me the tie, dear.

LOLA

I’ll have my chauffeur drop it off in the morning.

The limo driver opens Daniel’s door.

Lola clicks off and Daniel glares at the phone.

DANIEL

You stupid bitch. I can’t dye a red dress green.

Dictating a message on his phone.

DANIEL

Message to Tara. See if we have enough of the white silk to remake Lola’s dress. Get another pair of shoes and a clutch to dye too. She’ll send her husband’s third new tie – green, this time – in the morning.

He pushes the button to send the message and exits the limo, not glancing at the chauffeur.

He stops before opening the door to the house, closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

The limo pulls away.

INT. RICHARDS HOME – CONTINUOUS

To one side of the entrance hall, the opulent dining room is set for a romantic dinner for two.

On the home’s elaborate staircase, AMBER RICHARDS, late 20’s, beautiful, dressed for dinner, but herding a 4-year-old, DAN JUNIOR and a 2-year-old, ALICE, up the first couple of stairs. She turns, startled, then afraid, when she hears the door opening.

DANIEL enters, looks quickly at the dining room and smiles. Then he sees Amber and the kids on the stairs and is immediately furious.

DANIEL

You idiot! You know the kids are supposed to be in bed by seven-thirty and it’s seven-

He quickly glances at his phone.

DANIEL

thirty-one.

Amber quickly puts Alice’s hand in Dan’s and waves them up the stairs. Alice balks at leaving Amber.

Amber looks back at Daniel, positioning herself to block Daniel’s line of sight to the kids.

AMBER

I’m so sorry, Daniel. I heard you at the gate as I was taking the kids up, but thought I should put your dinner on the table before I saw to them since I knew you’d want your dinner. It will only take me a second to get them upstairs. They’re ready for bed, you see.

Daniel steps briskly to the stairs and slaps Amber hard on the face.

DANIEL

They should already be up there. You know that.

DANIEL

(slap)

How many times do I have to tell you before you do as I ask?

Daniel hits her arm with his fist and Amber falls back against the stairs.

Alice cries and Dan Junior tries unsuccessfully to shush her.

Amber glances at them in fear, struggles to get up off the step and away from the stairs to take the kids out of Daniel’s line of sight again.

AMBER

Your dinner is on the table. A beautiful steak, just the way you like it. And –

Daniel slaps her face again.

DANIEL

Shut up and stop making excuses.

Daniel storms to the dining room and Amber turns to motion the kids, both crying now, to hurry as they trudge up the stairs.

She watches Daniel for a moment to be sure he’s not turning back to her and then rushes up the stairs, picking up Alice and grabbing Dan Junior’s hand to move them more quickly.

INT. RICHARDS HOME – MINUTES LATER

DANIEL is smiling as he works on his steak and wine when AMBER comes into the room, a smile on her face, slap marks bright pink.

DANIEL

The steak is perfection. You’re an excellent chef. Please, sit.

Daniel half-stands as he motions Amber to her chair. Amber, abashedly flattered, moves to her seat.

DANIEL

Let me get you some wine.

AMBER

(smiling)

Thank you, dear.

INT. CLASSROOM – DAY

Tall and professorial, BENSON WATERMAN stands at the front of the room, fielding questions. He answers most questions with rapid dispatch and practiced clarity, but looks satisfied and eager when one student raises her hand.

MORGAN DAY is a high fashion model, or she could be if she looked vapid and disinterested, but her eyes are piercing, seeing into souls and finding the gut level intent of anyone she turns them on. Her face is engaged and engaging, smarter and kinder than most. She commands rooms, conversations, and respect without realizing she’s doing it and would be surprised if anyone called it out.

She wears a large diamond ring and men automatically envy her husband.

Waterman nods to her in anticipation of a challenge.

MORGAN

We’re still students. To what extent is the mind control we’re trying to achieve supposed to be effective at this point?

WATERMAN

If you’re doing mind control and you truly believe that you are putting thoughts in other people’s heads, you are. The confidence and assurance of the practitioner, not the receiver, is all that matters.

Morgan’s eye has a glint of mischief.

MORGAN

I think, therefore you do?

Waterman chuckles with satisfaction.

WATERMAN

Exactly as you say. We’ll see you all next week. Do your homework.

Waterman quickly exits the room.

Morgan walks from the room with other adult students, but she outclasses them despite their exalted job titles, Ivy League educations, and pompous demeanors.

STUDENT 1

You just flat out asked Waterman if the method he’s spent his life developing actually works.

Morgan laughs in amusement.

MORGAN

I just asked him if what we’re doing works yet. My husband asked me that after class last week so I told him I’d find out when I would be an effective Waterman practitioner.

STUDENT 1

Is he afraid you’ll have him flapping his wings like a chicken?

MORGAN

No, he’s a writer and he wants all the facts about everything.

STUDENT 1

Wait, you mean Gavin Day is your husband?

Morgan becomes disappointed and thoughtful as they head for the exit.

MORGAN

Yes.

STUDENT 1

Does he make fun of the Waterman Method?

MORGAN

(shaking it off)

No, of course not. The Waterman Method is real or we wouldn’t all be here, paying a ridiculous amount to take his class. We’d just stick to the book and pretend we thought it was nonsense if it wasn’t real, right?

STUDENT 1

(chagrinned, but laughing)

You’re right, of course. You always are.

Reaching the exit door of the building, Morgan touches Student 1’s arm as she heads into the revolving door.

MORGAN

See you next week. Practice!

Student 1 follows her through the door, watching with admiration as Morgan strides effortlessly down the sidewalk with all the looks of a model, but no hint of a runway strut.

INT. WOMEN’S SHELTER LOBBY – DAY

MORGAN enters the women’s shelter with an armload of dresses in hanging bags. A woman follows her with an armload of shoe boxes and a tote with purses in it.

Morgan drapes her bags over the back of a chair in the lobby.

MORGAN

I’ll just let Bridget know I’ve brought in a few things.

AMBER sits on a sofa in a waiting area, her back to the office. She has a bruise on one cheek, on her wrists and on her neck. She recognizes Morgan’s voice and pulls her kids closer, sinking down into the sofa to hide herself.

One of the kids pops up over the top of the sofa to squeal at the sound of Morgan’s voice.

AMBER

(whispers)

Shush! Sit down.

Morgan does a double take toward the couch and recognizes a bracelet on Amber’s wrist as Amber grabs the toddler and pulls the child down next to her.

MORGAN

That’s a Daniel Richards original. I just brought in a dress that would look fabulous with that. Let me find it for you —

Morgan rushes the dress to the couch and draws back in shock when she sees it’s Amber.

MORGAN

(abashed)

You have to promise me you won’t tell Daniel that I donated that beautiful black silk dress he made for me two years ago.

Amber waves her away.

AMBER

No problem. I won’t tell him.

MORGAN

I just think it’s better to let someone else wear these beautiful

MORGAN

styles than to let them sit in my closet, you know?

She draws closer to Amber and spots the bruises on Amber’s wrist and neck as Amber tries to hide the bruise on her cheek with her hand. Morgan is shocked.

MORGAN

Oh dear, what happened? Were you mugged?

Morgan sits on the couch next to one of the kids and leans in close to Amber.

AMBER

No, no, of course not. I was carrying too many things at once — staging them to bring here — and, and tripped on my way down the stairs.

MORGAN

I’m so sorry. Let me see. Have you seen a doctor? Those bruises look awful. What did Daniel say? Did he take you to the ER?

Amber shoos her back.

AMBER

Daniel knows I’m fine. I am. I was just clumsy and trying to carry too much at one time. I’m fine.

Amber looks away. Morgan cocks her head a little as she ponders, then has an insight.

MORGAN

Good god! Daniel didn’t do that, did he?

Amber blushes, shifts quickly, puts a smile on her face.

AMBER

No, I told you, I fell. I’m fine. Daniel would never hit a woman.

(looking down quickly and then back up to face Morgan fully)

I’m here donating, just like you. And you’d better not tell Daniel you saw me here either.

Morgan is puzzled. Amber pulls her sleeve over her wrist when she sees Morgan glance at it.

AMBER

He thinks I sell all our old things, but I bring them here. Especially the kids’ clothes. People here always need those.

Morgan looks a little relieved.

MORGAN

Of course. I won’t tell if you won’t.

Morgan continues to stare at Amber’s bruises. Bridget comes out of her office and spots Morgan.

BRIDGET

Morgan, dear! Come in. I’ll give you a receipt for all these wonderful clothes.

Bridget leads Morgan to her office and nods sympathetically to Amber as she does so.

Morgan looks over her shoulder at Amber with a quick wave, frowns and follows Bridget to the office.

[Robert Smith]

BOB SMITH READY FOR CRITIQUE

What I learned doing this assignment is…?

I learned that there is a forever useful criterion and rules for killer openings.

SYNOPSIS

TITLE: “Moths Around a Flame: The Making of “The Blue Angel.”

ACT ONE: Oscar-winning actor Emil Jannings seeks to revive his acting career in post-war Berlin and perhaps return to Hollywood. However, he learns at US Army Headquarters that he must satisfactorily explain why he appeared in Nazi propaganda films or face denazification, i.e., be barred from public appearances, effectively, ending his acting career. To explain, he recounts how he had experienced Nazi violence first hand during the early weeks of the production of “The Blue Angel” in 1930 and how he was advised that the only way he could survive the Nazis, especially, with a Jewish mother was to appear in their propaganda films. The entire film is a flashback of this time during the making of “The Blue Angel.”

ACT TWO: Kurt Gerron, a Jewish cast member, consults his rabbi with the question, Is it permissible to appear in the enemy’s propaganda films as a way to save one’s life and the lives of loved ones, the Rabbi answers, Yes, as long as no lives are taken in doing so. This answer is a reassurance to Jannings who now has more immediate problems. He is the star of “The Blue Angel” but fears upstaging by the director’s ‘discovery’ Marlene Dietrich. He complains to Sternberg who is reassuring but dismissive, and does not partner with Jannings, the Star, but spends most of his time mentoring Dietrich, who is clearly Sternberg’s mistress. The growing feud starts to disrupt fellow actors and crew members. Dietrich’s role is Lola Lola the cabaret showgirl love-interest of the straight-laced professor (played by Jannings) who is ultimately ruined because of his infatuation with her. When Jannings’ character strangles Dietirich’s character in the film, the over-acting Jannings actually injures Dietrich. Director Sternberg, pleads with the actors to put aside their needless rivalry and partner-for-art’s sake to make “The Blue Angel” a masterpiece, which they do. Dietrich sings her signature song, “Falling in Love Again,” and Jannings profoundly enacts the death of the professor as he dies a broken man clutching his teacher’s desk in his old classroom. Dietrich and Jannings reconcile and she invites him to come to Hollywood with her and Sternberg but Jannings says he must remain in Germany because Hollywood has already excluded him from “talkies” because of his heavy German accent. His only option, especially, after threats from pro-Nazi Studio Chief Hugensberg, is to appear in Nazi propaganda films. His conscience is free to do so on the basis of the Rabbi’s counsel to Gerronl that as long as lives are not taken, it is morally permissible to appear in Nazi propaganda films.

ACT THREE: Jannings makes it clear that he appeared in Nazi films because he feared terrible reprisals if he refused. However, it is discovered in Jannings’ dossier that he had campaigned for the Nazi Party during the Reichstag elections of 1938. This automatically requires Jannings’ denazification and the end of his dreams of reviving his acting career. The last image is that of Jannings, like his Professor in “The Blue Angel” clutching his Oscar, a ruined man – this, in contrast to Dietrich (a Nazi-critic) who leaves Germany for Hollywood and stardom, including singing her song “Falling in Love Again” even to troops fighting the German Army. It is ironic how life imitates art in the way Dietrich and Jannings end up like their characters in “The Blue Angel.”

MY FIRST TEN PAGES +

My choice of opening is a set up/twist opening combined with a contrast and action opening. What follows is the initial outline, then the scene.

INSERT: Documentary footage of the Allies fighting the German Army.

EXT. A US ARMY BASE AMPHITHEATRE – DAY

Thousands of TROOPS in the audience.

MARLENE DIETRICH is at the microphone. Her show is already in progress. She tells the troops, “Hey, guys! Give those Nazis the licking they deserve!”

The Troops applaud.

Marlene Dietrich says, “Here is my song from “The Blue Angel”

Dietrich begins to sing “Falling in Love again.”

The troops applaud as the song begins.

Her song continues AS background for the following actions.

General Eisenhower (VO) announces:

EISENHOWER (VO)

“From General Order One-zero-six-seven:

“Denazification: All who have rendered public

support to the Nazi Party shall be barred from

public appearances.”

Dietrich’s song fades and ends.

EMIL JANNINGS appears at the US Headquarters Berlin, waving his Oscar statuette yelling to the guards: “Don’t shoot! Don’t shoot! I won an Oscar!”

He tells the guards he wants to revive his acting career but the guards tell him he must be vetted and perhaps denazified.

Jannings proceeds to an interview with Major Kent Kershaw who is a fan but sticks to the business at hand. He tells and asks why did Jannings act in Nazi propaganda films. He tells Jannings that if his answers are not satisfactory, denazification would be required which would, in effect, kill all chances of reviving his acting to career. To answer Kershaw’s question, he tells of events during the production of “The Blue Angel.”

INSERT – – DOCUMENTARY FOOTAGE: US TROOPS BATTLE GERMAN TROOPS IN EASTERN FRANCE.

NEWSREEL NARRAOR (VO)

While our Army advances over the Rhine River

into Germany, movie star and singer

Marlene Dietrich, herself of German origin and

now an American citizen does her share for the

war effort as she entertains our troops.

EXT. AN ARMY BASE AMPHITHEATRE – NIGHT

This is filmed to look like newsreel footage.

A USO entertainment show for the US troops on the European front. MARLENE DIETRICH is at the microphone.

DIETRICH

Hey, guys! Give those Nazis the licking they deserve!

TROOPS hoot and applaud.

DIETRICH (CONT’D)

I became an American citizen,

you know. So, thank you, my fellow

Americans.

Troops applaud.

DIETRICH (CONT’D)

I am going to sing to you a song

from “The Blue Angel” in which

I appeared with Emil Jannings.

Troops boo at the mention of Jannings.

DIETRICH

No, don’t do that. I asked him

to leave Germany with me and come

to America. I suppose he had his

reasons to not leave. But.

He might have been up here on stage

with me now. Instead of

hiding out somewhere in Berlin.

First, from the Nazis, now from

the Russians. He was a great actor

who won the first Oscar for Best Actor.

But enjoy the song from our film.

Dietrich sings “Falling in Love Again” continuously, it is background music until noted below.

GENERAL EISENHOWER (VO)

“From Joint Chief’s Order One-zero-six-seven:

“Denazification: All who have rendered

public support to the Nazi Party shall be barred from public appearances.”

Dietrich’s song fades and ends.

EXT. POST WORLD WAR 2 BERLIN U.S. ARMY HEADQUARTERS – DAY

Super: BERLIN – AMERICAN SECTOR – 1945

Letters on the building spell, U. S. ARMY HEADQUARTERS

MILITARY POLICE (M. P.’S) are on guard duty at the kiosk at the gate.

The figure of a man emerges from the surrounding rubble, walking toward the M. P.’s. He is EMIL JANNINGS, age 60. He carries an Oscar statuette.

The M. P.’s put their rifles at the ready to aim and shoot.

M. P. #1

Halt! Who goes there?

JANNINGS

(brandishing his Oscar statuette)

Don’t shoot! Don’t shoot!

I won an Oscar.

The M.P.’s ease up and cross to Jannings.

JANNINGS (CONT’D)

Thank you, officers. I am Emil

Jannings.

M. P. #1

The actor?

JANNINGS

(reading from the Oscar)

“Best Actor,’ 1929 for “Last

Command” and “The Way of All

Flesh.”

M, P. #2

We need to see your papers.

JANNINGS

The Russians bombed Berlin back

into the Stone Age and you want

papers! Well, I have no papers!

I had hoped the Oscar would suffice

to confirm my identity.

M. P. #1

Of course it does. Why have you

come here?

JANNINGS

Isn’t it obvious? Why else do

people appeal to America? For

freedom! I have an acting career

to revive.

M. P. #2

He needs to be vetted.

JANNINGS

“Vetted”?

M, P. #2

Yes, you may need to be

denazified.

JANNINGS

Me? Denazified?

M. P. #1

Yes, you have to speak

with Major Kershaw.

JANNINGS

Major Kershaw?

M, P. #2

Major Kent Kershaw. He is

our Security Officer.

M. P #2 escorts Jannings through the gate and up to the front door of headquarters. They enter.

INT. U. S. ARMY HEADQUARTERS – OFFICE – DAY

Jannings is seated at the desk of Major Kent Kershaw, whose name and rank are on a name plate facing Jannings as does KERSHAW himself, seated at his desk.

Jannings has placed his Oscar on the Major’s desk.

Kershaw has a dossier file on Jannings open before him.

JANNINGS

It seems you already know more

about me than I know.

KERSHAW

Speaking personally, it’s an honor

to meet you, Mr. Jannings. One of

my favorite movies is “The

Blue Angel” Your performance as the

professor was superb. I am

surprised you did not win an Oscar

for it.

JANNINGS

I am surprised an Oscar didn’t go

to Marlene Dietrich’s legs.

Both have short laugh.

KERSHAW

I’d like to know about the making

of “The Blue Angel.” But we have

business to discuss here. I

understand You want to live here

in the American Sector.

JANNINGS

Yes, sir. East Berlin is a

Russian-dominated Hell Hole. I also

want to revive my acting career.

In fact, I may want to go back to

America. I lived in Hollywood, you

know.

KERSHAW

Well aware. However, before we can

give you these privileges, you have

to appear before the Commission. I

will advocate for you as best I can,

but you must explain, how did an

actor – a man of your stature – allow

himself to be used by the Nazis in

propaganda films.

JANNINGS

That’s easy. I did it in order to

survive. Had I refused, the Gestapo

would have carted me off to

God-knows-where.

KERSHAW

Fear.

JANNINGS

All Germans who weren’t Nazis were

living in fear. Now I am sixty years

old. I put up with twelve years under Hitler. I do not want to live in the

Soviet Sector for the rest of my life

under Stalin.

KERSHAW

Tell me about it. The Commission must

be satisfied that you do not need

denazifiation.

JANNINGS

What would de-nazifiqion entail?

KERSHAW

You could not make any more public appearance.

JANNINGS

You would end my acting career? But

it’s all that I live for. How can you

denazify me? I never was a Nazi!

KERSHAW

That is what you must demonstrate

to the Commission: how it happened

that you were used by the Nazis. But

first, I need to hear your story.

JANNINGS

Well, I’ll tell it as best as I can

remember. You’ll be pleased to know

my story goes back to the time of

the making of “The Blue Angel.” It

was 1929. Your Stock Market crash was devastating to Germany. Nazi Party

membership soared. I experienced the violence of the Stormtroopers, first

hand. It was on an evening, early in

the production, when Marlene Dietrich

took us all out to a night on the town. Marlene invited me even though we did

not get along.

INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL – NIGHT

The crew has left.

Cast members linger, seated in a circle with director, JOSEF von STERNBERG are: Emil Jannings, KURT GERRON, and HANS ALBERS.

Jannings introduces each person, each of whom come into focus as

Jannings introduces each by name.

JANNINGS (V.O.)

(continuing his story

to Kershaw)

There was Kurt Gerron, and director

Josef von Sternberg. Even Hans

Albers was there. His scenes were not scheduled to be shot, as yet. But

Hans would visit the set just to be

of support to his fellow actors. Hans

was an actor’s actor. Then, of

course there was Marlene Dietrich.

Marlene Dietrich enters.

Dietrich is dressed in characteristic tuxedo, tails, top hat. She smokes.

JANNINGS

Marlene, why are you dressed like that?

DIETRICH

It’s the only way a gentlemen should

dress.

JANNINGS

What’s the occasion?

DIETRICH

I am so thrilled to be playing the

part of the showgirl Lola Lola and

working with all of you, that I’d

like to take all of you out on the

town, and show you “the Berlin of

Lola Lola.”

JANNINGS

You mean “the Berlin of Miss

Dietrich.”

DIETRICH

“Miss Dietrich”! “Miss Dietrich”!

You all have my permission to call

me “Marlene.” I can ‘t stand the

formality. I am taking you out and

it is my treat because it is my first

leading role in a motion picture that

is the first “talkie” in Germany.

STERNBERG

Simultaneiously filmed in English for

the world to see you, my dear.

JANNINGS

You have a leading role, Marlene, but

as the star of “The Blue Angel,” I am

the one who should provide such largess

to the rest of the company and for you.

STERNBERG

Emil. Let Marlene provide largess. She

will soon be a star after “The Blue Angel.” I am taking Marlene back to Hollywood, to Paramount.

JANNINGS

But I am the star of “The Blue Angel.”

STERNBERG

No need to be defensive, Emil.

DIETRICH

(to Jannings)

And it is an honor to share the screen

with you. Of course, you are the star,

Emil. Allow me to host the star for a

Night of fun.

GERRON

It is too much for any one person.

I suggest separate checks. And we

all pitch in to pay for Miss – uh,

for Marlene.

DIETRICH

I wont hear of it. My treat.

All ad-lib their thanks.

STERNBERG

Remember, Marlene. Watch what

you eat. You still need to lose

a few pounds.

DIETRICH

I plan to exclude Schwarzwald

Kirchtorte and continue my training

at Mahir Sabri’s Boxing Studio.

ALBERS

Sabri? The Turkish Boxing Champion?

DIETRICH

Yes, would any of you like to join the

studio to shed a few pounds?

JANNINGS

I have already taken off forty pounds.

DIETRICH

Time to lose the next forty.

Jannings is not amused.

DIETRICH (CONT’D)

I’m only kidding, Emil.

Anyway, I’ll get literature about his

studio for all of you to read and

consider. But. For tonight, it’s Club Silhouette! That’s where you’ll meet

“the Einstein of Sex.”

GERRON

Who is that?

DIETRICH

Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld.

JANNINGS

(wryly)

I thought “the Einstein

Of Sex” was you, Marlene.

DIETRICH

I’ll take that as a compliment.

Emil, think of how the

straight-laced character you play –

Professor Rath – would regard Dr.

Hirschfeld and the Club Sllhouette.

STERNBERG

That’s a good suggestion.

(to Jannings)

Take it as coming from the

Director, Emil.

JANNINGS

I have had years of experience.

I know how an actor prepares.

DIETRICH

Gentlemen, onward to the Club

Silhouette.

JANNINGS

Isn’t that a gay cabaret?

DIETRICH

You don’t have to be gay to enjoy it.

Lot’s of show business people will be

there.

INT. THE CLUB SILHOUETTE – NIGHT

The club is art deco with a brash Victorian bar of one piece of wood and mirrors, lavishly supplied with liquors.

On stage, a chorus line of DRAG QUEENS enter and begins a musical number.

Marlene Dietrich, Josef von Sternberg, Emil Jannings, Kur Gerron, and Hans Albers enter.

DR. MAGNUS HIRSCHFELD and his partner GEORGE wave to Dietrich inviting her and her party to join them. Hirschfeld calls to a waiter to move another table together with his own so that all may be seated together.

Ad-lib: Dietrich introduces Dr. Hirschfeld to everyone in her party and they to him.

No sooner are they seated, the sounds of a marching army emanate from outside. They are the NAZI BROWN SHIRTS who march to the tune of the “Horst Wessel” which they sing.

They halt and stop singing in front of the Club Silhouette. Next, with homophobic curses they hurl rocks through the windows of the club. Glass shatters. The crowd in the club is paralyzed into silent fear.

Outside the Brown Shirts come to order and march forward, again, singing the “Horst Wessl.”

The Club Silhouette crowd are relieved.

Hirschfeld speaks his mind.

HIRSCHFELD

Luckily, no one was injured.

But when the Nazis take over –

which I fear is inevitable –

gays and Jews will be

annihiliated. And I am both.

ALBERS

You really think these fascist

idiots can take over a modern

nation like Germany?

HIRSCHFELD

It is because we dismiss them

as idiots that we don’t see

the power they have, and so

there is a surge in their

followers.

GERRON

I am also a Jew and I can smell their

takeover coming. And these Nazi scum

call themselves the Master Race! Many

Jewish leaders are saying it is time

for us to go to Palestine.

HIRSCHFELD

I am going there to visit next year.

I am not religious but I want to see

the land of our heritage. But. I am skeptical of this Zionist philosophy

of return. There are Arabs there who

don’t want us in Palestine even though

Jews have lived in Palestine since

before the land was first called

Palestine by the Romans. They are

killing us there. There are even

pro-Nazi Arabs here in Germany who

will reinforce Jew-hatred when they

return home.

ALBERS

In that case, where can anyone go?

I am not Jewish, but to the Nazis

I am a traitor to the Aryan race

because the love of my life is Jewish.

GERRON

I didn’t realize that Hansi is Jewish.

JANNINGS

This effects me too. My mother was

Born in Russia of Jewish origin.

DIETRICH

You overlook one thing! If by some

remote chance they did take power, they

would have to stop their crazy racial

hatred. The German people would not

stand for it. They Nazis would have to

change their message.

HIRSCHFELD

You are mistaken, Marlene. The German

people have allowed the Nazi movement

to grow despite Hitler’s imprisonment

where he wrote “Mein Kampf” There are

more Germans who have read his book and

are persuaded to his views than there

are Germans repulsed by it. My advice

to all of you is flee Germany before

they take power

ALBERS

I can’t live in any other country

but Germany – bad as it may become.

HIRSCHFELD

Are you willing to send Hansi abroad

for her own safety?

Albers does not answer.

JANNINGS

Like Hans, I don’t think I could

live anywhere else but Germany but

how do I survive the Nazis?

HIRSCHFELD

For one thing, don’t talk about your

Jewish mother. You and Hans are actors, appear in Nazi films.

JANNINGS

In other words, hide from the Nazis in

the open?

GERRON

How far do you go in cooperating with

an enemy in order to save your life and the lives

of your family? What is morally permissible? I know a great Rabbi, I will ask him.

STERNBERG

Well, as a Jew, I am glad I can get

out of Germany and go home to America,

to Hollywood.

DIETRICH

Take me with you.

STERNBERG

If Rudi permits.

DIETRICH

(to Hirschfeld)

Rudi’s my husband.

STERNBERG

We can find work for Rudi

in Hollywood as an Assistant

Director.

The music strikes up again

M. C.

And now, ladies and gentlemen,

the one and only Benny Brody.

Benny Brod, a Jewish comedian, enters.

BROD

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.

Did you hear this one? Hitler met

Jesus Christ. He asked Jesus, “Tell

me: How did you feed 5,000 people

with just five loaves and two fish?”

Jesus said to Hitler, “First, you tell

me: How did you make a the whole

German nation drunk without alcohol?”

GERRON

(to Brod, so that the

whole audience can hear)

Well said, Benny! The Nazis are the

scum of the earth.

BROD

Well said, Kurt! But from here on

just remember, I did not write you

into my schtick. Stick to Marlene

and “The Blue Angel.”

Some laughter.

JANNINGS

Impossible. I am the one who is

already stuck with Marlene Dietrich.

Because she is stuck to the director.

Some laughter and applause.

FADE OUT.

• This reply was modified 3 years, 3 months ago by  Robert Smith.

[Rob Bertrand]

Hi Bob,

Just gave your 10 pages a read. I feel like all the lessons are there. I think what I love most about your script is how classic it feels. It’s a real throwback to a golden age. Everything is there and I really get a sense of where the story is headed by page 10. I think my only critique would be your character descriptions. Currently, they don’t tell me much about your characters. For example, when we first meet Marlene Dietrich, all we know is she is on the microphone. I’d describe her essence more. Maybe with her experience she has the audience in the palm of her hand? Same goes for Jannings…When we first meet him, all we know is he’s carrying an Oscar statue. What does he look like? Is there fear in his eyes? Are his clothes old and worn out? Or did he put on his finest threads? I want to know more!

Can’t wait to read the whole script!

Rob

[Robert Smith]

Thank you, Rob. I appreciate your kind words and how much you like my script and also have some very useful suggestions about character descriptions. I’ll address that as I get to my first draft.

Bob

[Rob Bertrand]

Rob Bertrand Ready for Critique

Synopsis: After the death of her mother, Annie Andrews has fallen into a deep depression. In order to stay in online school, she agrees to go on a date with a boy she met online. After rejecting that boy, in favor of the mysterious new girl in town, Annie begins to experience paranormal activity around her house. Soon Annie and her sister Jessica become convinced that their house is haunted by the spirit of their late mother. As Annie’s relationship with her new girlfriend grows, so does the intensity of the paranormal activity. After sharing their first kiss, Annie’s girlfriend is attacked by an unseen presence and she’s hospitalized.

Annie’s father, Jack, believes his daughters are faking the paranormal activity for attention. His feelings are assured, when the police find evidence suggesting he’s right. Fed up, he grounds his daughters after a family argument gets personal. Worse, Annie’s girlfriend no longer wants to see her, considering the near-death experience she had with the ghost in Annie’s house. Isolated and unbelieved, Annie and her sister become determined to prove the paranormal to be true. But in the climax, we discover the house isn’t haunted by the ghost of Annie’s mom. The boy that Annie went on a date with has been living in her walls and after a psychotic break has taken on the persona of Annie’s mother. He wants Annie all to himself and has taken her father and girlfriend hostage. In the end, Annie has to make a choice. Who lives? Her father or girlfriend.

FIRST 10 PAGES

EXT. FIELD – WEDDING VENUE – NIGHT

Magic hour sets over a picturesque landscape, punctuated by the rhythmic bass of modern hip-hop. Somewhere a wedding reception is in full swing.

Through a field of parked cars, weaves a teenage girl, pulling her younger sister by the hand.

Meet, ANNIE ANDREWS, 16, purposefully plain, unintentionally pretty. The type of girl that prefers a hoodie and beanie over the sun dress she’s in now. Careful! She wields sarcasm like a deadly weapon and right now, she’s pissed.

Trailing behind is JESSICA, 8, lover of all things horror and dedicated gamer. She may be shy in the real world, but online? She’ll eat your soul alive.

JESSICA
Mom and dad are fighting.

ANNIE
No shit. Now, hurry your little ass up.

The sisters cut through a row of cars and find their parents arguing beside their mom’s 69 VW Bug.

The guy who can barely stand is JACK ANDREWS. A hardworking, harder drinking, blue-collar conservative.

JACK
(slurred)
Gimme the fucking keys, Nora.

NORA ANDREWS, late 30s. On a normal day, she’s an overworked mother, who bears the weight of her dysfunctional family on her shoulders. But tonight, that all ends.

NORA
(angry)
You said you had this under control!

JACK
Give me…my fucking…keys!

NORA
(whispers)
Get in the backseat, Jack or so help me God, I will leave you here. I will leave you and take the kids…

Annie and Jessica approach quietly.

Jack goes to say something, but the look on Nora’s face stops him cold. He caves and crawls over the driver seat and plops himself into the back.

Nora slams the door in his face.

ANNIE
Mom, are you okay?

NORA
Annie….I need you to…I need you to drive.

CLOSE ON the car keys in Nora’s palm.

INT. NORA’S BUG – MOVING – LATER

A light rain falls as the wipers churn rhythmically.

Annie grips the steering wheel with the white-knuckle confidence of a student driver.

Nora stares out the passenger seat window, lost in thought.

NORA
Wasn’t that a beautiful wedding?

Jack quietly stews in the backseat, as Jessica plays her Nintendo Switch, doing her best to ignore him.

ANNIE
Yeah, until Dad caused a scene–

JACK
–Over a couple of homos? Shit, man…

Jack stares daggers at Annie.

NORA
They looked so happy together…

ANNIE
It’s twenty-twenty-two, dad. Gay people exist!

Nora attempts to change the subject.

NORA
I think I’m going to take a hot bath when we get home–

JACK
(angry)
–We should have won that fuckin’ anniversary dance!

Annie rolls her eyes.

ANNIE
Give me a break, dad.

JACK
(angry)
It’s fuckin’ bullshit! Marriage wasn’t even legal for them thirty-two years–

ANNIE
(angry)
Dad! Stop!

The rain is really coming down now. Nora reaches over and turns up the wipers. The rhythmic sound amping the tension.

JACK
Right! I forgot! Complain and get cancelled. The queers own this world now.

Annie is hurt to the very core of her being.

ANNIE
You’re such a homophobic asshole!

EXT. CROSSROAD – HIGHWAY – AERIAL – NIGHT

High above a four-way intersection, two vehicles approach the crossroad. A yellow light blinks its warning as the rain comes down in buckets.

INT. NORA’S BUG – MOVING – LATER

The wipers, now set to full blast, are no match for the torrential downpour.

NORA
Don’t listen to him. That’s the liquor talking. Love is love. No matter how you find it.

JACK
Pssshhht.

Annie’s face is a mask of terror. Headlights approach from the side road.

ANNIE
Mom! What do I do?

NORA
You’ve got the right of way. They’ll yield to you.

It’s hard to hear over the noise of the wipers. Annie is panicking.

ANNIE
I can’t see!

JACK
Why can’t women wear miniskirts in San Francisco?

The approaching truck is not slowing down, it’s speeding up!

ANNIE
Shut up!

JACK
Because their balls would show!

Jack erupts into a fit of laughter.

Nora looks back, anger burning in her eyes. The light of the approaching car illuminates her from behind. It’s close. Too close!

NORA
(angry)
Jack, please–

–It’s too late. Screeching tires and a blazing truck horn scream through the night. The truck barreling towards them.

The second before impact.

INT. CHURCH – FUNERAL – DAY

Rain patters against a beautiful stained-glass window, as a pipe organ plays Ava Maria.

In the front pew, sits Jack, Jessica and Annie. Jack looks a mess, with bloodshot eyes and unkempt hair.

Jessica can’t hold back the tears. She leans close to Annie, whose protective arm she clings to.

There’s no tears in Annie’s eyes. Only anger and rage.

All eyes are on them.

Annie looks over to her father. His hands shaking in his lap.

Her eyes shift back to the coffin. Only now, it’s been replaced by the smoking wreck of Nora’s VW Bug. Nora’s mutilated body is trapped. Her head nearly decapitated.

The light fades to black. Thunder CRACKS as lightning flashes, illuminating the silent audience behind them. Their faces decomposing flesh.

Nora’s dead eyes shoot open and when she opens her mouth to speak, it pours blood and gore. Her voice is hard as gravel.

NORA
Look at what you’ve done to me! Look at what you’ve done to my family!

Nora throws her head back, as blood pumps out of her neck, showering Jack, Annie and Jessica in warm, red gore.

They scream.

INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – ANDREW’S HOUSE – MORNING

CLOSE ON Annie’s eyes as she’s startled awake, screaming from the nightmare.

SUPERIMPOSED: Seven months later.

She takes a moment to catch her breath, before rolling over to check her phone. Her eyes go wide.

INT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY – MORNING

Annie exits her bedroom and is greeted by the sounds of wedding music from her parents’ room.

ANNIE
Grandma?

She heads off to investigate.

INT. JACK’S BEDROOM – DAY

The bedroom door cracks. Light peeks in revealing Annie.

ANNIE
Grandma?

She enters the room, stepping over empty liquor bottles on the floor and throws open the drapes.

Sun cuts through the bedroom like a knife to reveal Jack, sound asleep, clutching Nora’s wedding dress to his body.

Annie is shocked to see him.

ANNIE
What the hell are you doing here?

Jack groans and pulls the covers over his face.

JACK
I’m back.

ANNIE
Where’s Grandma?

JACK
She went home, I guess.

Annie surveys the scene. Jack and Nora’s wedding video plays on a loop on a TV on the dresser. The wedding dress triggers her. She pulls it from his grasp.

ANNIE
What the hell are you doing?

Jack sits up. Shakes the cobwebs from his mind. Stretches.

JACK
I like the smell.

Annie wants to smell the dress, but can’t.

JACK
She looked so beautiful that day. Fuck, we were just kids…

Annie looks at the wedding video on TV. Her mom, happier than we’ve ever seen. She clicks the TV off. Wads the dress up in a ball and throws it on the ground.

ANNIE
Well, she’s dead now….so?

JACK
God damn it, Annie! That dress meant a lot to you your mother! It was her favorite thing…

ANNIE
Get up, pops. I need a ride to school and I can’t be late!

INT. HEAD OFFICE – HIGH SCHOOL – MORNING

The phone rings off the hook, as the Front Desk Aide fights with a group of unruly boys.

Amidst the chaos, sits Annie and Jack. Side by side, but they couldn’t be any farther apart. Both stare at a door marked: GUIDANCE COUNSELOR. Both want to be somewhere else.

Behind the door, the unmistakable sound of an argument.

JOCELYN (O.S.)
(angry)
Oh…sure! Side with the fascist!

BECKY (O.S.)
Shall I call your dad? Is that what you want, Jocelyn!?

The door BURSTS open to reveal JOCELYN WILCOX, 17. Professional new kid. Her pink hair, nose ring and punk t-shirt scream teenage rebel. Her current attitude: Fuck you.

For Annie, it’s love at first site.

BECKY
That’s it, young lady! I’m calling…

JOCELYN
Do whatever the fuck you want, Becky. I’m outta here…

Jocelyn catches Annie staring and winks as she slides on a pair of sunglasses. She storms off, as her Step-mom chases after her.

In the doorway, stands ROBIN WILKES, 50s, overworked and underpaid, Guidance Counselor extraordinaire. She wears years of experience on her denim vested shoulders.

ROBIN
Uh…yeah…sorry to keep you waiting. Please, come in.

Annie and Jack both sigh.

INT. ROBIN’S OFFICE – HIGH SCHOOL – MORNING

Certificates and awards line the wall, along with family photos that haven’t been updated in a while.

Robin, sits behind a complicated mess of paperwork.

Annie and Jack sit far apart.

ROBIN
Yes…uh…

Robin checks the name on her file.

ROBIN (CONTINUED)
Mr. Andrew’s, I’ve invited you here to talk about Annie’s grades.

Annie rolls her eyes.

ANNIE
Do I have to be here for this?

ROBIN
I’d like you to be a part of the conversation, Annie. Your voice is important!

ANNIE
Like I get a say in any of this.

JACK
Let her talk, Annie.

ROBIN
Mr. Andrew’s, I know that your family has suffered an immeasurable loss.

JACK
Jack. Call me Jack.

ROBIN
Okay. Jack. I’m very sorry. You’ve been through a lot.

JACK
Yes. We have.

ROBIN
In a previous meeting with me, Annie made a comment that her family has become…

She checks her notes again.

ROBIN (CONTINUED)
Absolutely miserable.

Annie shoots her a look of disgust.

ANNIE
That’s not what I said! God!

Jack shoots Annie a sharp look.

JACK
You told a stranger that our family is miserable?

ANNIE
(angry)
I don’t know? Maybe because when mom died, you dumped Jessica and I off with Grandma and disappeared for six months?

Jack looks away embarrassed. His eyes haunted with memory.

JACK
I…um…

ANNIE
It would’ve been nice to get a phone call!

JACK
(angry)
Oh, poor you! Life’s so fucking hard…Did you have a roof over your head?

Robin steps in to redirect the conversation.

ROBIN
As you know, the school made an exception and allowed Annie to move to online school. It’s been seven months…in that time, Annie’s grades have slipped from a four point oh grade point average, down to a two point five.

JACK
(shocked)
What?

ANNIE
Don’t worry about it. I’ve got it under control.

ROBIN
No one is judging you, Annie.

JACK
I am. I’m judging.

ANNIE
(angry)
Well, excuse me…but I don’t give a shit what you think–

ROBIN
–I think it’s time that Annie came back to the live classroom. I think she could really benefit from social interaction.

ANNIE
(laughs)
Fuck that! I’m staying home.

JACK
Annie…can’t you just be normal for once and go to real school, like everyone else?

Annie shakes her head, insulted and ready to explode.

ANNIE
If I could be normal, then trust me, I would! But I’m not coming back to this hell hole.

JACK
I think Mrs. Wilkes is right. You do need some social inter–

ANNIE
–I’m going on a date Sunday! I’m meeting people just fine!

Jack is caught off guard. Robin’s eyes light up with excitement.

ROBIN
Oh! Wow! That’s wonderful, Annie!

[Robert Smith]

Hi, Rob!

Excellent work. Something I may not have remarked upon is so evident here. I like the way your description/directions have an engaging conversational style. YOu have an excellent first ten pages that have all the principal elements to keep me reading, and I am sure will keep others pegged to the pages. I hope they will soon peg a producer.

Bob

[Michelle Damis]

EMPTY NEST is the story of a bored, depressed, existential, homeless vampire (Osgood)that ends up living with empty-nester, wannabe parents (Jim and Marin) that take in a tenant so that they can be free of their soul-sucking daughter(Nina). They have essentially traded a soulsucker for a bloodsucker.

Osgood discovers there are things that he really hasn’t experienced in his 600 plus years of existence.

INT. STUDY/LIBRARY- MODERN DAY – NIGHT

An UNKNOWN MALE FIGURE sits in an expensive leather chair next to a roaring fireplace. A well-aged book wide open on his lap, the classic fairytale words, “Once Upon a Time” visible. SIBLINGS, 16yrs old, one female, one male, sit with uncertainty on the couch opposite.

MALE FIGURE(V.O.)

Let us begin. The year was…

EXT. CONCERT VENUE 1987 – NIGHT

DURAN DURAN on stage performing, “Hungry like the Wolf”. The crowd going crazy, a sea of 80’s fashion, and new-wave hair.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

1987?… That’s not right. Let me think… Hmm…Oh Yes!

Closeup “Twilight Zone” style clock face speeding forward.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

2022… I began that year as unquestionably the world’s most bored vampire and unbeknownst to me I was soon to be homeless.

INT. STUDY/LIBRARY – MOMENTS LATER

The siblings exchange a glance, half curious, half disbelief.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

Yes. A vampire. Completely bored with my own existence. Over 600 years of mundane, unexciting, eternal disappointment. The worst curse imaginable.

The flames of the fire transform into a pile of burning garbage, continuing into a montage of the destruction of the planet and its resources.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

Add to that, endlessly watching mortals waste. They waste everything; the planet, their resources, themselves. They repeat mistake after mistake. They never learn.

Montage shifts to: Money, banking, stock market, violence.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

And greed… Stupid pieces of paper they make the center of their universe. They even murder for it…the emptiest of all reasons to kill in my opinion.

Black and white clips from old vampire movies, villagers with pitchforks, etc… Blends into montage of humans committing various atrocities over time.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

Ironically, humans call vampires evil. Well, the ones that believe in us anyway. Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black? But, I digress(deep sigh)…back to boredom.

Clip of a “bored” stereotypical “Dracula” vampire.

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

“Bored to death”?… I wished! Did you know that vampires cannot kill themselves? It’s literally impossible… Trust me. I tried. And tried. And tried.

Montage of various stereotypical vampires trying to kill themselves: falling, drowning, poison, hit by train, etc…

MALE FIGURE (V.O.)

Even that got boring…

INT. OLD HISTORICAL BUILDING – NIGHT

A MALE FIGURE stands, face concealed, gazing out a window.

MALE FIGURE(V.O.)

At the time I was living in an abandoned building, it was an architectural gem and it was free. I preferred not to use currency when I could avoid it… One of my few principles.

Over the centuries I’d gone from pauper to millionaire and back several times, it was easy when you had the time on your hands that I did… It was like taking candy from a baby… which I’d also done a time or two.

This is the first time we see OSGOOD THE VAMPIRE, mid to late twenties, handsome, but not perfect. His face full of character and charm, with piercing eyes that hold centuries of stories. He is bent over a pram and a crying baby.

OSGOOD

(to camera) Did you expect a monster? Oh…and I can’t turn into a bat and I DON’T sparkle…

Flashback of Osgood at a desk piled with books. Close-ups on books: Medical, Law, Architecture, Engineering, etc…

OSGOOD (V.O.)

I also read a lot. I could’ve passed any number of exams, to be a lawyer, a doctor, an electrician. Again, time was on my side, but I hated it.

Flashback to a group of children playing in slow-motion. Time lapse footage baby to death-bed

OSGOOD (V.O.)

When humans are young time seems to go painfully slow. As they age, time continuously accelerates until their final moments are but a blur.

A flashback of Osgood with a dying patient in a hospital bed.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Mortals have one thing in common, it’s that no one gets out alive. Whether by my hand or not, their time is finite and I envied that.

A coffin lowering into the ground.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

You know Vampires don’t sleep in coffins to avoid the sunlight, right? It’s really a symbol of what they can never have.

INT. ABANDONED HISTORICAL BLDG – NIGHT

Osgood turns away from the window he was standing in earlier. Dead serious with his infinitely wise eyes.

OSGOOD

(directly into camera)

The grass IS always greener.

He crosses the room to a mirror, smoothing his hair.

OSGOOD

(in mirror)Yes… I can see my reflection.(turning to camera) More rumors.

Osgood selects a jacket off the rack and puts on his shoes.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Think about it… Never seeing yourself change, is far worse than never seeing yourself at all.

INT. STAIRWELL ABANDONED BUILDING – NIGHT

Osgood glides down the dimly lit stairs.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Of course, I spent my days out of the sun. Unfortunately…the daylight thing is an issue…

EXT. ABANDONED HISTORICAL BDLG – NIGHT

Exiting the building into the cool night air. Osgood loves the smell of honeysuckle, he doesn’t know why exactly.

A flyer posted on the nearby fence catches his eye. “NOTICE” in BIG, RED LETTERS. He reads it quickly and shoves it in his pocket before heading down the street alone.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Nights I often met up with other vampires. We’d frequent places typically open late.

EXT. LAUNDROMAT – NIGHT

Osgood is walking past a laundromat. Through the window a LONE PERSON is seen digging thru a dryer suspiciously.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

All night laundromats were surprisingly interesting places. You wouldn’t believe how many people steal underwear. There are a few less thanks to me.

Clip of lone person with panties and a terrified face. Blood spatters on dryer door glass. From inside the machine we see Osgood wipe the blood spatter with a rag.

OSGOOD

(thru the glass)Such an easy place to clean up too.

EXT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT

Osgood walks along a wall of graffiti belonging to a nightclub. The music THUMPS from within like a heartbeat.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Nightclubs were natural hangouts of course… Alcohol has no effect on us, no taste either. We CAN eat anything, but nothing has flavor or sustains, but blood.

A line of people wait to get into the club. A BOUNCER waves him to the front of the line letting him pass. Osgood slips him a hundred dollar bill. (Freeze-frame on bill).

OSGOOD (V.O.)

My hatred of standing in line trumps my money principle.

INT. NIGHTCLUB – CONTINUOUS

Osgood walks down a long ramp into the bar. MUSIC BLARING.

OSGOOD

(to camera) Human blood has the most flavor…animal blood varies.

Stopping at a viewpoint over a sea of mortals writhing on the dance floor like a pit of snakes.

OSGOOD

Some humans are animals.

He overlooks the crowd with a forlorn, faraway gaze.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

I started a game with myself long ago to pick the most despicable humans I could. Naively, I thought I could somehow do good.

Shrugging with disappointment.

OSGOOD

(to camera)I never made much progress.

INT. NIGHTCLUB BAR – CONTINUOUS

Osgood’s gaze transitions to his POV. A guy at the bar(MR. DRINK SPIKER, a little to old for the crowd, ex-athlete, white-privilege all but stamped on his forehead) sneaks something into a BEAUTIFUL, OBLIVIOUS WOMAN’S drink.

Across the bar a pair of fury-filled, green eyes belonging to NINA BREWSTER (23, Medusa like curls, Athena’s beauty, and all of Pandora’s curses locked up in her attitude) observes the “sly” attack.

Without losing visuals on her target, Nina slams a shot of Vodka flavored courage, and beelines for the assailant who has no idea the wrath heading his way. Nina darts around the bar, whisks the spiked drink away from its prey and confronts the predator. She taps him on the shoulder.

NINA

Excuse me.

He turns, towering over her petite frame. She steps in closer, hand raised, drink perched in her tiny palm, smiling.

MR.DRINK SPIKER

Well Hello.

He oozes. She sparkles.

NINA

You forgot your drink at the bar, and you look REALLY thirsty.

His creeping eyes now static. She raises the drink closer to his face. Taunting.

NINA

What? It looks delicious… Come on, drink up!

His face flushes like a douchebags red Corvette(that probably is sitting in the parking lot). Nervously, he looks around, his eyes momentarily connect with Osgood’s, who has a decent seat for the show. He turns to leave, Nina grabs his arm, he comes out swinging, Nina ducks.

The commotion catches the BARTENDERS attention, he and a BOUNCER are on the spot in seconds, but not before Nina throws the drink in Mr. Drink Spikers face. He lunges at her. The bouncer is bigger and quicker, the douchebag is in a headlock before he knows what’s happened.

BARTENDER

What’s going on here?

NINA

He put something in that woman’s drink.

Motioning to the still oblivious beauty at the bar.

NINA

I thought he might like a sip.

MR.DRINK SPIKER

That’s BULLSHIT!

He screams from the headlock that just got a bit tighter.

MR.DRINK SPIKER

I don’t know what she’s talking about.

He barely squeaks out. His red flush quickly turning blue.

BARTENDER

We’ll take it from here. In the future, let us handle it, OK?

NINA

Suuuure.

BARTENDER

(leaning close) And hey, drinks are on the house for you tonight. Good work.

He discreetly extends his hand for a fist-bump, only to receive a thankless eye-roll.

Nina’s cell phone VIBRATES. Text reads, “WE’RE HERE!” Looking up, she spots THREE FRIENDS about her age. They look like they all just walked out of Forever 21. She heads their way.

Osgood follows Nina with his eyes, not breaking his stare even when a SEXY WAITRESS interrupts him.

SEXY WAITRESS

Can I get you a drink?

OSGOOD

I’ll be having a drink later.

The sexy waitress moves on…her ego almost bruised.

Osgood stands fixated until ELLIS (30’s, strong, black vampire) and YEE-LING (early 40’s, Chinese vampire. Her elegant, shiny hair falling to her waist) both appear out of nowhere on either side of him as he watches Nina.

“Freeze” on Ellis(text across screen)“Vampire-401 Years”.

“Freeze” on Yee-Ling(text across screen)“Vampire-192 Years”.

Ellis leans closer registering Osgood’s view of Nina.

ELLIS

For later?

OSGOOD

I don’t think so…

Yee-ling glances at her phone.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Yes, vampires text. Why wouldn’t we? Who do you think invented the blue light filter?

Flashback of a stereotypical vampire looking at an old cell phone with a bright screen going up in a puff of smoke.

OSGOOD (V.O.)

Serious lifesaver…

YEE-LING

Pasha is waiting for us, come on…

INT. NIGHTCLUB/VIP COUCH AREA – MOMENTS LATER

PASHA (the fittest 85-year-old Russian on the planet. The baby of the group, bottom of the pecking order) Pasha enthusiastically waves Yee-Ling and the others over to private, plush, white VIP couches.

“Freeze” on Pasha (text across screen) “Vampire – 2 Years”

Osgood positions himself where he can still see Nina across the dance floor. A waitress drops off bottle service.

ELLIS

Ozy…What’s new with you?

Osgood really hates that word, ”new”. His glare quickly changes as he remembers something. He reaches into his pocket and throws the folded piece of paper at Ellis. Yee-ling, panther-like, snatches it out of the air.

ELLIS

What is it?

Yee-ling scans it quickly.

YEE-LING

Ozy has to move… Again.

She tosses the paper to Ellis. CLOSE-UP ON FLYER. Osgood’s building is being torn-down to build fancy new condos.

ELLIS

Why don’t you just give in and buy one of these new condos? It’ll be years before the gentrification catches up.

YEE-LING

(mocking)Because he looooves his “architecture”…

PASHA

Yeah, Ellis told me you have plenty of money…

Pasha realizes he should just shut up. A phone RINGS. Yee-ling answers.

YEE-LING

(speaking perfect Swedish)

Osgood looks at Ellis confused.

ELLIS

Babbel… She’s addicted…

They listen to her in awe. Yee-ling hangs up.

YEE-LING

That was Magnus, he wants us to meet him at the bowling alley.

Pasha excitedly hops up, his young Vampire status keeps his enthusiastic. (Give him a few years.)

ELLIS

Let’s go then…

Before following the others out Osgood scans the room, getting a last glance of Nina on the dance floor.

EXT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT

Osgood and the others exit, the cops are next to a squad car wrapping up with Mr. Drink Spiker.

Ellis, Yee-Ling and Pasha immediately head down the street. Osgood doesn’t move.

PASHA

(yelling) Ozy…?

In the background Mr. Drink Spiker sulks away, citation in hand.

OSGOOD

I’m just not up for Magnus tonight. You guys go.

YEE-LING

(in Russian)Suit Yourself.

ELLIS

(to Pasha) What did she say? Nevermind, I can’t keep up…

Osgood watches them walk away, then heads in the opposite direction. He quickly catches up with Mr. Drink Spiker who is fumbling with his keys.(which of course ARE to a “douche-bag-mobile” sportscar). The two make eye contact. It’s true that the eyes can say it all.

An incoherent blur of fast movement, blood spatters on car window.

INT. NIGHTCLUB/DANCE FLOOR – NIGHT

Nina dances the night away, her whole life ahead of her. Music pumping, flashing red lights transition into.

INT. BREWSTER HOUSE MAIN BEDROOM – EARLY MORNING

Flashing red of alarm clock – 4:50am. A manicured hand silences the alarm.

MARIN BREWSTER, (mid 50’s, healthy and vibrant looking, even at the crack of dawn) slides quietly out of the bed. She tries not to disturb her husband of 30 years.

JIM BREWSTER (mid 50’s. George Bailey, Ted Lasso and Rudy (NOT Giuliani BTW) rolled into one. Seriously the best person anyone knows). He even looks happy when he sleeps.

[Amy Falkofske]

Hey Michelle,

Do you want to exchange feedback?

Amy

[Michelle Damis]

Yes. That would be great! Thank you

[Amy Falkofske]

Great! I’ll take a look at your pages this weekend.

Amy

[Michelle Damis]

Posted your feedback under the #7 forum. I think that’s what we are supposed to do.

[Amy Falkofske]

Hey Michelle,

I posted your feedback in Day 7.

Amy

[Amy Falkofske]

Amy is Ready for Critique!

Synopsis: Andrea is the noon news anchor at the local TV station. Her dream is to anchor the network news. She pursues this like her life depends on it because to her, it determines her worth. Truthfully, she doesn’t actually enjoy covering hard-hitting news, but she’s in denial about that. She is married to Josh and has two kids, Benjamin and Chloe, but she is neglectful towards them because she is so focused on her career.

One day she goes to cover the new supercollider at the local university. She accidentally gets sucked into the machine and ends up traveling through time and visiting different memorable points in her life. When she eventually comes back through the machine, it’s a year into the future and she has been missing from her life for a year. The woman that Josh hired to be the kids’ nanny, Meagan, has taken over her life and is now engaged to Josh. Andrea isn’t that concerned about her family but distraught that she no longer has a career. After some begging, Andrea’s old boss agrees to hire her back.

Josh drops Meagan like a hot potato and tries to pick up where he and Andrea left off. He pursues her for a while, but gets tired of being rejected and decides he’s going back to Meagan. Once Andrea realizes what’s she lost, she starts to think twice about her priorities. Now she has to compete with Meagan for Josh’s attention. She also starts making an effort with her children, although she’s not doing a very good job because she’s still torn between them and her career.

While all of this other stuff is going on, Andrea is pressing the professor for information about the machine and whether Meagan knew that it was capable of time travel. She also pressures him to help her go back to the time period she came from so she can get her career back.

First 10 Pages

FADE IN:

INT. – UNIVERSITY SCIENCE LAB – DAY

A large tube-like machine WHIRS LOUDLY. It’s huge. It takes up almost the whole room. It’s a supercollider.

An old man is running back and forth frantically. This is Dr. Smitty.

DR. SMITTY

TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!

A young woman stands next to the machine unfazed, smug. It’s MEAGAN DONOHUE, 30s. She is Dr. Smitty’s teacher’s assistant.

A man holding a camera stands frozen in place, not sure what to do. This is WBEN anchor Andrea Richards’ cameraman, MARK.

DR. SMITTY

(to Meagan)

COME ON YOU DOLT! JUST DON’T STAND THERE.

Dr. Smitty runs towards the machine.

He reaches for the switch, but…

ANDREA RICHARDS, 30s, suddenly pops out of the machine. The normally quaffed news anchor is disheveled and completely disoriented.

Meagan frowns. Mark stands with his mouth open.

DR. SMITTY

THANK GOD!

ANDREA

I’m back!

DR. SMITTY

What happened? What did you see?

ANDREA

I’ve got to go home. I need to talk to my family.

Andrea bolts out of the lab.

DR. SMITTY

Wait! Mrs. Richards, we need to talk about this.

INT. – NEWS DESK – TWO WEEKS EARLIER

ANDREA RICHARDSON, (35) peers into a mirror and scrunches up her face. She is in her happy place, behind the anchor desk, where all her life’s purpose is and most of her self-worth lies.

ANDREA

Ick!

She fixes her lipstick and rights a stray hair, then smiles a satisfied smile.

ANDREA

All better!

FLOOR MANAGER (O.S.)

Going live in 30.

Andrea quickly slips the mirror under the desk. Her brow furrows as she studies her script.

FLOOR MANAGER

In 5-4-3-

The floor manager points to Andrea.

She plasters the smile back on her face and looks directly into the camera.

ANDREA

Good evening and welcome to WBEN’s 5 News at Noon. Breaking at this hour, the late David Miller’s painting entitled “Love Unrequited” was stolen from the Johnston City Art Museum.

Andrea turns to the monitor behind her on the set.

ANDREA

With me now is the museum’s curator, Seth Meyers. Seth, thank you for joining me.

INT. MUSEUM – DAY

SETH MEYERS stands in front of a blank wall.

SETH

You are very welcome, Andrea. You’re looking very pretty today.

INT. – NEWS DESK – DAY

ANDREA

Uh, thank you. Seth, this extraordinary painting was valued at 4 million dollars, correct?

INTERCUT CONVERSATION

SETH

That’s correct, Andrea. This was David Miller’s last painting before he passed away. It was a portrait of Sadie Wilson, the woman who was the love of his life. Sadly, his love was unrequited, thus the title of the painting, ‘Unrequited Love.”

ANDREA

Seth-

SETH

Andrea, I wanted to take this opportunity to let you and all your viewers in on a secret of mine. I too have unrequited love. It’s you, Andrea.

LAUGHTER CAN BE HEARD in the studio.

Andrea stifles laughter herself.

The floor manager signals to Andrea to wrap up the interview.

ANDREA

Sorry, Seth. Gotta go!

INT. –NEWSROOM – MAKEUP ROOM -NIGHT

Newsroom employees can be seen through the door scurrying back and forth. Something exciting is happening.

The MAKE-UP LADY is putting blush on Andrea.

Andrea punches a few buttons on her phone and puts it up to her ear.

INT. – KITCHEN – NIGHT

JOSH RICHARDSON, (30s), Andrea’s husband’s phone buzzes. He picks it up and continues to stir something in a skillet.

JOSH

I hope you’re calling to tell me you’re on your way home.

INT. – NEWSROOM – MAKEUP ROOM – NIGHT

Andrea shoos the MAKEUP LADY away.

ANDREA

What are you wearing?

INTERCUT PHONE CONVERSATION

JOSH

Two unhappy children.

ANDREA

I have to cover this story. It could be my big break.

JOSH

I’ll miss you too.

ANDREA

But you’ll love all the money I’ll be making when I get hired by the network.

Josh sighs and hangs his head.

ANDREA

Besides, you’ll be up when I get home, right? For some quality time?

A smile spreads across Josh’s face.

JOSH

Ugh! What am I going to do with you?

INT. – KITCHEN – NIGHT

Chloe and Benjamin sit at the kitchen table. Chloe writes furiously, looking back and forth between her paper and her textbook. Benjamin reads. Josh is engrossed by something on his phone.

Chloe abruptly stops what she’s doing and looks up at her dad.

CHLOE

Dad?

JOSH

(without looking up)

Yeah?

CHLOE

When’s mom coming home?

JOSH

She’s not.

Josh finally looks up.

JOSH

She was discovered today.

CHLOE

Discovered?

JOSH

Yeah, by a Hollywood director.

BENJAMIN

Really?

CHLOE

Is mom going to be in a movie?

JOSH

I’m sure she will eventually. She’s very attractive and the camera loves her.

BENJAMIN

But what about us? You said she was just working late.

JOSH

You’ve got me.

CHLOE

No offense dad, but you can’t even do 7th grade math.

JOSH

Neither can your mom.

CHLOE

Dad! Are we ever going to see her again?

BENJAMIN

Yeah! I can’t believe she would just leave us like that!

JOSH

Okay, relax you two. She IS just working late, and I don’t know exactly when she’ll be home. Knowing her, probably after we’ve all gone to bed.

Chloe and Benjamin sigh in relief.

CHLOE

DAD! That wasn’t funny!

EXT. – UNIVERSITY SCIENCE LAB – NEXT DAY

The MAYOR of Johnston City stands next to a MAN in a lab coat just in front of the double doors leading inside the lab and behind a huge red ribbon. He holds a giant pair of scissors. They stand before a small gathering of people, one of which is Meagan.

Andrea stands off to the side with Matt. Matt is holding his camera and recording the ceremony.

MAYOR

And so I’d like to invite Dr. Ronald Smity up to help me cut the ribbon and officially open the Johnston City University Science Lab.

DR. SMITTY, 60S, sports a head full of white hair. He walks with a cane and wears glasses on the tip of his nose.

DR. SMITTY

Thank you, Mayor. It’s an honor to be with you here today. We already have lots of important work in progress, and I can’t wait to share it all with you.

MAYOR

Great! Let’s cut the ribbon!

They cut the ribbon.

There is APPLAUSE FROM THE CROWD and the CLICKING OF CAMERAS CAN BE HEARD.

Meagan rushes up to Dr. Smity.

MEAGAN

Dr. Smitty?

DR. SMITTY

Yes?

MEAGAN

I’m your new teacher’s assistant.

DR. SMITTY

Oh, yes. I did hear that you were coming. Nice to have you.

MEAGAN

I’m really excited to get to work with you on the new supercollider. I hear it’s nearly finished.

DR. SMITTY

Yes, getting very close.

MEAGAN

I’ve been doing some research, and I understand that time travel is a very real possibility with the supercollider.

Dr. Smity looks taken aback.

DR. SMITTY

Uh, yes, possible, but not advisable. Why are you-

ANDREA (O.S.)

Dr. Smitty!

Dr. Smity tears his attention away from Meagan.

DR. SMITTY

Yes?

ANDREA

Andrea Richards with WBEN. I wonder if could steal a moment of your time for an interview.

MEAGAN

Andrea Richards! I watch you on TV every day!

She holds her hand out the Andrea.

MEAGAN

Meagan Donahue. Dr. Smity’s new TA.

ANDREA

Nice to meet you.

MEAGAN

Our sons are on the same baseball team. I know your husband.

ANDREA

You know my husband?

MEAGAN

And your kids!

Dr. Smitty clears his throat.

DR. SMITTY

Um, ladies.

ANDREA

Oh! So sorry, Dr. Smity. Where were we?

INT. – UNIVERSITY SCIENCE LAB – ONE WEEK LATER

Andrea positions herself beside the supercollider readying herself to be on camera. Dr. Smitty is standing to her left.

Mark points his camera at her.

MEAGAN (O.S.)

Wait! You can’t start without me.

DR. SMITTY

Meagan, you’re late.

MEAGAN

The traffic was terrible. This mean guy in a Toyota wouldn’t let me merge. This always happens to me.

ANDREA

Meagan? Have we met?

Meagan plasters on a fake smile.

MEAGAN

Yes. We met at the dedication ceremony. I just couldn’t miss you being here today.

DR. SMITTY

Shall we get started?

ANDREA

Yes. Let’s get started. Mark, are you ready?

MARK

Ready in 3-2-

Mark points at Andrea.

ANDREA

I’m here with Dr. Smitty and-

MEAGAN

Wait! Why don’t we turn the machine on?

DR. SMITTY

That’s not advisable.

ANDREA

Actually, Dr. Smitty, I think that’s a great idea. Show the folks at home what it looks like in action.

DR. SMITTY

You don’t understand. That’s very dangerous.

ANDREA

But I’m Andrea Richards.

Andrea checks her reflection in the camera.

ANDREA

The whole town will be watching this.

DR. SMITTY

No. I just can’t.

MEAGAN

Dr. Smitty. Don’t you want to impress the those scientists at Harvard who doubted you. You built this. Show them what this baby can do.

Dr. Smitty ponders what Meagan has just said, hesitates, then finds his resolve.

DR. SMITTY

All right. I’ll turn it on.

Dr. Smitty leans across Andrea and locates a large switch. He pushes it up and the machine whirs to life.

ANDREA

Great! Let’s begin again.

Mark cues Andrea to begin speaking.

ANDREA

I’m Andrea Richards with WBEN and-

MEAGAN

Wait!

Dr. Smitty rolls his eyes, exasperated.

DR. SMITTY

What now?

MEAGAN

Maybe Andrea should stand closer to the machine, you know, for impact.

Then two things happen at once. Andrea takes one step to her right closer to the machine as Dr. Smitty grabs her arm to pull her back, but…

It’s too late.

SWOOSH

Andrea gets sucked into the machine and disappears.

[Pablo Soriano]

INT. LIVING ROOM – DAWN

A cracked, dusty window looks out over some flat, obscure terrain as the sun creeps over the horizon. CRASH. A flashlight cracks the window, a few more times for good measure as light floods into the room. We now see it’s a vast desert.

ANDRES(V.O): My mother was never someone who liked to start any trouble.

IRMA, a cute, Catholic mother that, with just a look, could make the Devil feel guilty, splashes some fluid on the arm of a ragged couch. She lights a match. The light from the flame reveals a black eye and a scab on her lip.

ANDRES(V.O.): But she would if she felt she had to.

She gives the sign of the cross and whispers a short prayer before she gently flings the match on the fabric. As the fire spreads, she looks over to the next room. As the fire spreads, she looks over to the next room.

IRMA(Whisper): Antonio.

INT. NURSERY – DAWN

ANDRES(V.O.): My brother, on the other hand, would start trouble on a whim.

ANTONIO, a turbulent teen, was marveling at the damage he had already done. Standing in a child’s bedroom as an old crib burns along with several stuffed animals. Satisfied, he dashes out.

INT. LIVING ROOM – DAY

Irma hands Antonio a small duffel bag.

ANTONIO: Where’s Andres?

CRASH.

INT. KITCHEN – DAWN

ANDRES is a small and decent child. Powdered with dirt and sand, he hesitantly stabs at the remaining kitchen windows with a broom handle.

ANDRES(V.O.): I never liked to break rules, much less break a window.

IRMA(O.S.): Andres. That’s good enough.

INT. LIVING ROOM – DAWN

Andres enters looking at his mother as if waiting for the next instruction. She grabs both of her sons by the arm and pulls them by the front door which is wide open. She pulls them down to a crouch.

ANDRES: Now what, mama?

IRMA: We wait for more smoke. Try not to breathe it in. We’ll need a lot of it to cover us.

EXT. GHOST TOWN – DAWN

As the smoke begins to drape over the abandoned houses, a drone ominously hovers above, its propellers wisp the smoke into black coils.

TITLE SCREEN: THREE DAYS EARLIER

EXT. DESERT – NIGHT

Dead of night, the rocks and cacti are as still as the moon overhead. Some whispers and gravelly footsteps break the silence as a gaunt, Mexican man crouches behind tarbush. A young girl piggybacks aiming a flashlight ahead. He’s out of sorts, and the small flashlight isn’t much help. BUZZ. He frantically scans left and right, looking for the source of the sound. Frightened, scrambles from one desert fauna to the next. The man looks back with his flashlight but still can’t find where the sound is coming from. One deep breath and he picks up a sprint.

EXT. EL RIO GRANDE – NIGHT

We see a bird’s eye view of the father and daughter in night vision. His eyes glow brightly, visibly showing fear as he desperately makes his way across the shallow Rio Grande.

He heads towards the massive metal fence. All the while, the night vision camera from above follows them as they walk along the fencing.

EXT. TEXAS BORDER – NIGHT

With urgency, the man runs along the fencing and with a sigh of relief, comes upon an opening. He passes through. Suddenly a spotlight from an SUV blinds him. The side of the car reads: U.S. BORDER PATROL.

OFFICER(in Spanish): Stop! Don’t move!

With the light now on him, we see he is drenched in sweat, his shirt is torn apart. His daughter is sunburnt and her lips are chapped and bleeding. Completely defeated, he doesn’t put up any fight as he is completely surrounded by men in green uniforms. The gaunt man hears the BUZZ again. He looks up to see several drones hovering over him.

INT. US BORDER PATROL, EL PASO SECTOR – NIGHT

Chief Patrol Agent THOMPSON, as shown on his badge, a tree stump of a man, stares at the monitor displaying the apprehension of the illegal immigrants in night vision. The gaunt man on-screen stares back before he is then collected by the officers. Thompson is accompanied by a few other agents of varying ranks though he is clearly the one in charge. All are standing, aside from one man who sits on an old office chair. FRANK KAZAKOWSKI(50), a rough-looking man with a clean crew cut, sits rigidly with a look of indifference. He is no agent. His left hand is handcuffed to the arm of the chair.

THOMPSON: So how long do the batteries last on those birds?

Frank clenches his jaw.

THOMPSON: I asked you a question, Frank.

FRANK: I did what you asked. What is it that you want?

Thompson is unruffled.

THOMPSON: This was just a trial run. But I’d say it went well. Which is good… For your sake.

Frank leans back on his chair, ready to listen.

THOMPSON: You’re gonna help us. You’ll be my eyes in the sky.

Frank smirks.

FRANK: I highly doubt you’ll get the approval.

THOMPSON: Who says I’m requesting any?

Frank chuckles.

FRANK: Won’t the DEA be expecting you to hand me over?

Thompson shakes his head.

THOMPSON: They don’t know you’re here. They have no idea about your drug-smuggling drones.

Frank’s smile disappears. Thompson closes in.

THOMPSON: Here’s the deal: Your team is done importing goods. From now on, you work for me. And you’re going to help me catch illegals.

FRANK: Like hell, I will.

THOMPSON: It’s that or you and friends go straight to prison. We know where your men are. Just one phone call and this deal goes up in smoke.

Frank shakes his head. Thompson gets in closer.

THOMPSON: How long you think you would last in County Detention, Frank. Sapo’s got some connections there. They find out you’ve been pinched, they’re going to want to make sure you keep your mouth shut. Permanently.

Beat.

FRANK: So what, you’re going to put me on the payroll?

Thompson squints.

FRANK: We’re going to need some… “government funding” if you will. My birds don’t fly for free. There will be costs.

Thompson turns to look at his men. He laughs heartily. The other agents echo his laughter.

THOMPSON: This is a simple offer, Frank. The only exchange we’re going to make is you telling me when the wetbacks reach the wall and where we can find them. Other than that, I’ll pretend you don’t exist.

FRANK: That ain’t fair. That’s a shit ton of man-hours for nothin’.

THOMPSON: You’re a smart man. I’m sure you’ll find other ways to make an income. But it ain’t gonna be with Sapo. Cuz if I find out you bring even an ounce into Texas, I’ll bury you my fuckin’ self.

Thompson takes Frank’s silence for compliance. He unlocks the handcuffs and hands Frank an outdated smartphone.

THOMPSON: I’ll be in contact. And you’d better answer. Now get the fuck out of my sight.

Frank rubs his wrist as he gets up and heads for the door.

THOMPSON: Oh and Frank?

Frank stops but doesn’t turn.

THOMPSON: Not a single person makes it across on your watch, you got it? If one stinkin’ spick gets through, you’re done.

Frank is already walking out the door and doesn’t bother closing it behind him.

INT. ESCANDON RESIDENCE – DAY

Irma stands defiantly with a mop as she wards off her husband, RICARDO, the town drunk. She’s got one black eye and a bloody lip. He isn’t without a couple of lumps either.

ANDRES(V.O.): Like I said… If she had to… start trouble, that is.

Irma whips the mophead at her husband causing him to flinch.

ANDRES(V.O.): As for my father? Well. Trouble stuck him like the stench of booze.

RICARDO: You won’t make it.

IRMA: You think I won’t try? Lord knows you won’t come after us.

RICARDO: No?

IRMA: Not a chance. You’d miss the craps table too much. And the free tequila.

RICARDO: Irma. Why are you making this so difficult?

IRMA: Ricardo. I’ve told you, there is no more money.

RICARDO: You’ve always got a stash somewhere.

IRMA: Not anymore. You’ve spent it all.

RICARDO: Well, then how do you think you’re going to make it to the States, then? The Coyotes don’t do it for free.

IRMA: It’s already been taken care of.

RICARDO: Irma. Sapo is going to kill me.

IRMA: I will sleep soundly knowing that it was no fault of mine.

Ricardo leaps at her and grabs the mop handle. Right as he’s about to give her another blow…

ANDRES(OS): Stop!

ANDRES, the youngest and most gentle son, is at the doorway, eyes already welling up. ANTONIO, comes up right behind him. Once he sees the situation, he shoves his little brother out of the way and lunges at his father. Both grab each other by the collar as Irma pushes the dirty mop into her husband’s face.

ANDRES: I said STOP!!!

Everyone freezes in their offensive poses. Ricardo shoves his son off as Antonio snarls at him.

ANDRES(V.O.): This is the last time we’d all be together. This is the last memory of my father.

Andres begins to cry and runs into his room, his school backpack awkwardly bouncing.

ANTONIO(to Ricardo): It’s not like you can beat more money out of us. Just fuck off already.

RICARDO: Don’t talk to your father like–

ANTONIO: Fuck! Off!!

IRMA: Antonio. Go see if Andres is alright.

Antonio fakes a punch and Ricardo flinches as he storms out of the room. Ricardo gives one more desperate look at Irma.

RICARDO: What am I going to tell Sapo, eh?

IRMA: Tell him I say “hi.” What the fuck do I care.

Ricardo leaves and Irma holds her mop the way a conquistador would stick a flag in the territory they now claim. Her firmness begins to melt as she starts to weep. But only for a moment. She gathers herself and cleans up the mess their fight had caused. Antonio stands on the doorway.

IRMA: How is Andres?

ANTONIO: How do you think? You should be the one to talk to him.

Irma points to her black eye.

IRMA: Maybe not right away.

Antonio gives the look of disapproval that many teenagers give to their parents.

ANTONIO: Whatever.

He heads for the door.

IRMA: Where are you going?

ANTONIO: I don’t know. I just don’t want to be here.

Before Irma can say anything, he’s already out the door.

IRMA: Yeah. Neither do I.

INT. FRANK’S DRONE HEADQUARTERS – DAY

PETE, a walking number 2 pencil, immersed in several of his laptops, locked into the surveillance cameras around the property, constantly checking his phone. The rest of the team are at their own computers, waiting. On-screen, a pick up truck pulls into the backlot.

PETE: He’s here. And he’s alone.

The team regroups, all standing now. Frank walks in.

PETE: Holy shit. When you told us to meet you here, I figured for sure that–

FRANK: That the DEA would swarm in? I wouldn’t do that to you guys. I’d sooner give them the names of the suppliers than my own team.

PETE: What happened last night?

Frank looks around at the rest of the crew.

FRANK: Everyone go home. Except Pete.

JOE: Is everything alright, Frank? Are we fucked?

FRANK: Not yet. Just go home to your families.

LUIS: Should we be thinking of cuttin’ town?

FRANK: Maybe. But for now, y’all will need to distance yourselves from… this. Focus on your day jobs if you have any. I’ll reach out to you guys if I need you.

The group gives each other uneasy glances and slowly makes their way out. When everyone is gone, Frank and Pete stand there in silence.

PETE: I guess the fact that you’re out here and not in there is a good sign.

FRANK: It’s safe to say that the Federales need all the help they can get.

PETE: Lemme guess. They want a cut.

FRANK: Not exactly.

PETE: Well, what do they want then?

FRANK: I’ll explain it all to you in a minute. But first, we gotta call Sapo.

PETE: Um. I don’t think it’s a good idea to tell our supplier that you just got caught by the border patrol.

FRANK: I’m not. But we are going to need some leverage if we want to continue doing business.

PETE: Frank?

FRANK: Yeah, Pete?

PETE: Are we fucked?

FRANK: Not yet, Pete. Not just yet.

INT. FACTORY – DAY

Irma punches rivets into jeans using bulky, deafening machinery. Repeating the same action over and over. If she wasn’t singing the tune on the radio, you’d think she was a part of the mechanism itself.

HECTOR, a roly poly in a short-sleeve button-down and a clip-on tie, is fixated on the clipboard in hand. Marching up to Irma’s section, never looking up.

HECTOR: Irma.

The machine stops when she turns to him.

HECTOR: Your break isn’t for another two hours.

She checks her watch.

IRMA: OK?

HECTOR: Well, your husband’s here and he says he’s meeting you for lunch.

Irma throws her head up, clenches her fists, and is just about to yell at the sky before she takes a quick breath and gathers herself.

IRMA: I’m sorry, Hector. I’ll tell him to leave.

HECTOR: Remember you have to submit requests to change up your schedule.

IRMA: No. I know. He was just… trying to surprise me. I’ll go talk to him.

Another quick breath and she curves around Hector.

HECTOR: This will have to cut into your break time.

Irma turns, mouth agape, hands on her hips. Her eyes are laser beams. Mom is pissed.

HECTOR: Or… I can let it go… this one time. But remember–

Irma is done with the conversation and turns on a heel. Hector nods, looks to see if anyone saw her blatant disrespect, and dives back into his clipboard. He marches over to the next sector.

INT. BREAK ROOM – DAY

Ricardo is smacking the side of a vending machine when Irma stomps in.

IRMA: What do you want?

RICARDO: I want the goddamn Cheetos I paid for.

SMACK.

IRMA: What?

RICARDO: The damn machine ate my money.

Irma looks at this man-child with such disdain. Enough.

IRMA: What. Do. You. Want.

Ricardo gives up on his snack and turns to her.

RICARDO: I’m going to need you to get your next paycheck in advance.

Beat.

IRMA: What?

RICARDO: I don’t think you truly understand the severity of the situation.

IRMA: I don’t care. Ricardo, solve your own problems for once.

RICARDO: I… I… This… is the only thing I can come up with, Irma.

IRMA: To get an advance? That’s all the money we have. How are we-

RICARDO: Irma, please. As my wife, it is your responsibility to–

Irma’s whole body deflates as she rolls her eyes. She’s heard this argument too many times.

IRMA: Oh please. Cut the bullshit.

Ricardo looks at her feet as a tinge of desperation runs down his face.

RICARDO: You really don’t understand the seve–

IRMA: Severity of the situation. Yeah, I heard you.

Beat.

RICARDO: You really don’t care what happens to me.

IRMA: When did you ever care about us, Ricardo?

RICARDO: Of course, I care about you, Irma.

IRMA: No. US! Not just me. You have two sons. When was the last time you spent quality time with your own children? I’d give you a little bit more credit if you were actually a good parent.

Ricardo is defeated. He has no argument.

RICARDO: I’ll make it up to them.

IRMA: Ok. I’m going back to work now.

She heads for the door.

RICARDO: Irma. Those boys might lose their father.

IRMA: They lost him a long time ago.

The door slams shut. Ricardo stands alone. He turns to the vending machine and gives it one last SMACK in frustration.

INT. FACTORY OFFICE – DAY

Hector, still jotting on his clipboard is just about to sit down when Irma walks in.

IRMA: Hector. I’m going to need an advance on my next paycheck.

[Michelle Damis]

Pablo, would you like to exchange feedback? Mine is above. PS.. I was able to copy the 10 pages into a Word document insert all my comments and then repost the 10 pages with my feedback into FORUM #7 (which I believe is where our feedback is to be posted-if I’m doing it correctly)

[Pablo Soriano]

Of course. Apologies for the late reply.

[Pablo Soriano]

Hi Michelle,

I’ve posted my notes of your first ten pages on the Day 7 Assignment forum. Sorry for the delay. Hope you find it helpful.

[John Budinscak]

I’m having problems posting my Day 6 assignment. For the past few days I’ve made multiple attempts with both word documents and pdf files – all to no avail. I’ve sent emails to Support asking for help and simply receive a reply that my ‘request has been received’. I’ve stated I can send the completed assignments as attachments so someone could post it on the site for critique and I’ve received nothing in return. May I please get some help?

Thank you.

Budinscak Ready For Critique

Day 6

Synopsis:

A restaurant shares a parking lot with a funeral home. Jack, a chef and low-level criminal, sees something he shouldn’t have when he ventures to the dumpster in the parking lot. When questioned by Don Vito, a local crime boss, Jack denies seeing anything. But Don Vito doesn’t believe Jack and asks that he do him a favor – to personally deliver a package for the Don. In return, Don Vito promises NOT to burn the family restaurant to the ground. Jack agrees to make the trip to what he believes is Atlantic City – it’s not. And he doesn’t realize his two pain-in-the-ass nephews are stowaways in his Caddy and will tag along for the entire trip – they do. The reveal of the location AND his passengers are after page 10.

TITLE: Route 30A to Burbank

FADE IN:

SUPER: “1988”

EXT. PARKING LOT – NIGHT

A hearse leaves a funeral home and navigates a large parking lot shared with a quaint restaurant, Carmine’s.

INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

The kitchen, while clean, shows it age. Music plays from a small radio on an upper shelf, just below a matronly portrait of the family matriarch.

JACK, late 20s, a miniature nuclear warhead with a hair- trigger detonator yet slicker than a two day oil spill, moves gracefully in synch to the music as he cooks. He’s a natural in the kitchen.

JACK

This is intoxicating, Ma, you taught me good. Bet you didn’t think I could use intoxicating in a good way, did you? Me neither.

(looks at portrait)

Now don’t be mad for me wasting food.

He spins a knife and slices a loaf of Italian bread in half. He pulls a wad of cash from his pocket, stuffs it between the bread halves and slides the bread in a bag.

JACK

I know you’re gonna be really pissed when you see where it’s going. I promise, last time I see the old man, or whatever he calls himself.

Jack scribbles ‘FH’ on the bag and stores it next to the radio. He approaches a large pot of sauce and inhales deeply.

JACK

I promise I’ll be a better person. I know I say that all the time, but I mean it. Starting … tomorrow. I can’t tonight. I gotta do one more thing. Promise. Okay?

Knock, knock – someone’s at the kitchen door.

JACK (sing songy)

Who is it?

TOMMY

It’s your brother with two surprises.

JACK

As long as it isn’t those two little ass…..

In through the door walks Jack’s brother, TOMMY, a large, living teddy bear in his mid 30s with cousins PUCK, 12, a dweeb, and SAL, 12 and exuding sneakiness. Jack isn’t thrilled to see his nephews and lets it show.

JACK

If it isn’t Puck and Sal. And what brings you two disasters into my kitchen? Did Uncle Tommy force you?

TOMMY

They wanted to help, right boys?

SAL

That ain’t what happened.

PUCK

Why is it that Sal and I have to help?

Sal mocks Puck behind his back. Puck knows, Sal doesn’t care.

PUCK

I know you’re making fun of me.

SAL

No, I’m not.

PUCK

I can see you. Why be so conniving?

Sal wants to pound Puck’s smug mug.

SAL

I know what that means, I looked it up. Your picture’s there.

Sal pushes Puck, Puck pushes back and it’s on. In seconds, glasses are broken, flour fills the air and sauce is splashed on the floor.

JACK

HEY!

Everything and everyone stops, even the flour is suspended in midair. Tommy shoots Jack a ‘don’t go crazy now’ look. Sal comes up from behind and pushes Puck.

SAL

Tag, you’re it.

Sal spins away, takes a step and bounces backwards off the wall known as Uncle Tommy. Tommy grabs a hold of both nephews.

JACK (to Tommy)

Still wonder about my feelings?

Neither nephew return Jack’s menacing stare, they study the floor instead. Jack exhales long and slow composing himself.

JACK

Puck, you grab the meat. Sal, you got the sauce. Go. NOW!

Tommy holds the door while the nephews quickly exit the kitchen. He giggles as Jack mouths expletives at him.

TOMMY

It’s family, Jack, they’re boys.

JACK

Family? They ain’t my boys.

TOMMY

You can’t carry a grudge forever.

JACK

I’ll never forgive them.

Tommy’s giggle gets louder.

JACK

You go ahead, enjoy their company out there. I’ll stay and clean up their mess. Go on.

Tommy laughs out loud, Jack pelts him with pieces of bread. The radio flips from music to news.

NEWSCASTER

A key government informant in the battle against organized crime has gone missing.

EXT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

Jack tosses a couple of bags of trash in the dumpster when he sees his friend and stoops to pet a big orange tabby cat.

JACK

Hello there, Rusty.

Jack watches a hearse pull into an open garage door at the funeral home. MEN exit the hearse and rush to the open back door. They struggle with a body bag that jerks around wildly.

JACK

I’ve never seen one do that.

Jack steps back, right on Rusty’s tail – Me-YEOW!

The men by the hearse look over, but hustle their package inside and shut the garage door.

Carmine’s back door opens, a hand slips out a saucer of milk.

JACK (O.S.)

Sorry, Rusty.

INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

DINING ROOM

• This reply was modified 3 years, 3 months ago by  John Budinscak.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 3 months ago by  John Budinscak.

[Amy Falkofske]

John,

Sorry you’re having issues. You can send it to me at amy2of4falkofskes@verizon.net and I will try to post it for you.

Amy

[John Budinscak]

Amy,

Thank you, Amy, I appreciate your offer very much! I am going to try and paste one page at a time. If that doesn’t work, I’ll send you an email to you with the lesson as an attachment. A sincere thank you!

John B

[John Budinscak]

Amy,

I just sent an email – Subject Line: Budinscak Day 6 Lesson – with two attachments, one a word doc and the other a pdf file. I went to edit my post, but I was only able to paste a couple of pages before being denied access by the firewall. Your offer is greatly appreciated – thank you.

Sincerely,

John B.

[Amy Falkofske]

Posting for John Budinscak…

Budinscak Ready For Critique

Day 6

Synopsis:

A restaurant shares a parking lot with a funeral home. Jack, a chef and low-level criminal, sees something he shouldn’t have when he ventures to the dumpster in the parking lot. When questioned by Don Vito, a local crime boss, Jack denies seeing anything. But Don Vito doesn’t believe Jack and asks that he do him a favor – to personally deliver a package for the Don. In return, Don Vito promises NOT to burn the family restaurant to the ground. Jack agrees to make the trip to what he believes is Atlantic City – it’s not. And he doesn’t realize his two pain-in-the-ass nephews are stowaways in his Caddy and will tag along for the entire trip – they do. The reveal of the location AND his passengers are after page 10.

TITLE: Route 30A to Burbank

FADE IN:

SUPER: “1988”

EXT. PARKING LOT – NIGHT

A hearse leaves a funeral home and navigates a large parking lot shared with a quaint restaurant, Carmine’s.

INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

The kitchen, while clean, shows it age. Music plays from a small radio on an upper shelf, just below a matronly portrait of the family matriarch.

JACK, late 20s, a miniature nuclear warhead with a hair- trigger detonator yet slicker than a two day oil spill, moves gracefully in synch to the music as he cooks. He’s a natural in the kitchen.

JACK

This is intoxicating, Ma, you taught me good. Bet you didn’t think I could use intoxicating in a good way, did you? Me neither.

(looks at portrait)

Now don’t be mad for me wasting food.

He spins a knife and slices a loaf of Italian bread in half. He pulls a wad of cash from his pocket, stuffs it between the bread halves and slides the bread in a bag.

JACK

I know you’re gonna be really pissed when you see where it’s going. I promise, last time I see the old man, or whatever he calls himself.

Jack scribbles ‘FH’ on the bag and stores it next to the radio. He approaches a large pot of sauce and inhales deeply.

JACK

I promise I’ll be a better person. I know I say that all the time, but I mean it. Starting … tomorrow. I can’t tonight. I gotta do one more thing. Promise. Okay?

Knock, knock – someone’s at the kitchen door.

JACK (sing songy)

Who is it?

TOMMY

It’s your brother with two surprises.

JACK

As long as it isn’t those two little ass…..

In through the door walks Jack’s brother, TOMMY, a large, living teddy bear in his mid 30s with cousins PUCK, 12, a dweeb, and SAL, 12 and exuding sneakiness. Jack isn’t thrilled to see his nephews and lets it show.

JACK

If it isn’t Puck and Sal. And what brings you two disasters into my kitchen? Did Uncle Tommy force you?

TOMMY

They wanted to help, right boys?

SAL

That ain’t what happened.

PUCK

Why is it that Sal and I have to help?

Sal mocks Puck behind his back. Puck knows, Sal doesn’t care.

PUCK

I know you’re making fun of me.

SAL

No, I’m not.

PUCK

I can see you. Why be so conniving?

Sal wants to pound Puck’s smug mug.

SAL

I know what that means, I looked it up. Your picture’s there.

Sal pushes Puck, Puck pushes back and it’s on. In seconds, glasses are broken, flour fills the air and sauce is splashed on the floor.

JACK

HEY!

Everything and everyone stops, even the flour is suspended in midair. Tommy shoots Jack a ‘don’t go crazy now’ look. Sal comes up from behind and pushes Puck.

SAL

Tag, you’re it.

Sal spins away, takes a step and bounces backwards off the wall known as Uncle Tommy. Tommy grabs a hold of both nephews.

JACK (to Tommy)

Still wonder about my feelings?

Neither nephew return Jack’s menacing stare, they study the floor instead. Jack exhales long and slow composing himself.

JACK

Puck, you grab the meat. Sal, you got the sauce. Go. NOW!

Tommy holds the door while the nephews quickly exit the kitchen. He giggles as Jack mouths expletives at him.

TOMMY

It’s family, Jack, they’re boys.

JACK

Family? They ain’t my boys.

TOMMY

You can’t carry a grudge forever.

JACK

I’ll never forgive them.

Tommy’s giggle gets louder.

JACK

You go ahead, enjoy their company out there. I’ll stay and clean up their mess. Go on.

Tommy laughs out loud, Jack pelts him with pieces of bread. The radio flips from music to news.

NEWSCASTER

A key government informant in the battle against organized crime has gone missing.

EXT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

Jack tosses a couple of bags of trash in the dumpster when he sees his friend and stoops to pet a big orange tabby cat.

JACK

Hello there, Rusty.

Jack watches a hearse pull into an open garage door at the funeral home. MEN exit the hearse and rush to the open back door. They struggle with a body bag that jerks around wildly.

JACK

I’ve never seen one do that.

Jack steps back, right on Rusty’s tail – Me-YEOW!

The men by the hearse look over, but hustle their package inside and shut the garage door.

Carmine’s back door opens, a hand slips out a saucer of milk.

JACK (O.S.)

Sorry, Rusty.

INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

DINING ROOM

The dining room is neat, yet worn – it’s ready renovation. Tommy leans on a wall covered with pictures of family events held at Carmine’s. He spots Jack’s lost-in-thought expression.

TOMMY

You alright?

JACK

Yeah, I think so. Why?

TOMMY

You had that same look when you figured out Santa Claus wasn’t real.

JACK

Santa and the Easter Bunny had the same handwriting.

TOMMY

How about this?

Tommy wears a shit-eating grin as he points to one picture in particular where Jack’s disheveled and the boys are all smiles eating ice cream cones.

JACK

The bank ride. Gee thanks, Tommy.

TOMMY

Let it go.

JACK

No. C’mon.

At the table, Puck and Sal eat with their aunt CAT, 30s, a stern librarian who scares them, and Aunt BETTY, 30s, free spirit who lets them get away with murder. On the end of the table is a new fangled ‘speakerphone’.

TOMMY

Can’t believe I’m saying this, but Jack’s a better cook than ma.

CAT

Stop. Ma?

TOMMY

I ain’t kidding. Jack, wha’d you use that gives it that kick?

JACK

You know I won’t tell you.

CAT

Tommy’s right. This is…

SAL (blurts out)

Good shit.

Puck giggles immediately. Jack gives Sal a pretty good slap on the back of his head.

SAL

Ouch. Why’d you do that?

JACK

Because you’re wrong. This is GREAT shit.

Puck snorts a laugh, Jack cuffs Puck.

BETTY

We should do this more often.

JACK

What’s that? Eat here for free or have me hit the boys?

BETTY

Get together, talk, eat, enjoy each other’s company. Know what I mean?

JACK

Ehhh.

BETTY

Our cousin Marie and her family are coming to town. We should get together as a family.

JACK

Which cousin?

BETTY

She’s a cousin once removed… um, how the hell do I know, she’s family.

JACK

So you want to have a get together? Like a family union?

CAT

It’s reunion. You said union.

JACK

How can it be a RE-union if you’ve never had one before.

Everyone looks at each other confused, except for Jack who’s waiting for his statement to sink in.

CAT (motions to nephews)

Can you pick up their moms at JFK next Tuesday morning?

JACK

I’ll have to check my schedule.

CAT

Excuse me?

JACK

I’m a busy guy, I’ll see what I can do.

Tommy uses bread like a sponge to clean his dish. Beads of sweat form a bridge between his eyebrows. Sal and Puck exchange curious glances.

JACK

Sal, once Tommy starts eating, keep your feet and hands clear.

That gets a chuckle from everyone.

JACK

Do what now?

CAT

Kennedy Airport, Tuesday morning.

Jack shrugs ‘yeah’, then motions to the boys.

JACK

What’s gonna happen to these two delinquents?

CAT

They’re mine for a couple of days.

The boys exchange helpless glances – they want to cry. Jack flashes a devilish grin – he’d be scared, too.

JACK

Doesn’t that sound like fun.

Tommy dries his head with a handful of napkins.

JACK

A little too spicy?

TOMMY

No, it’s great. I just can’t stop sweating. Ma would be proud.

JACK

She’d be envious.

Cat pinches Jack’s cheek – hard. He winces.

CAT

That’s from ma. Want to do a little something for cousin Marie and Aunt Susie? Maybe here?

JACK

Yeah. Here or outside. We’ll talk about it.

Cat leans in and whispers so only Jack can hear.

CAT

Tommy’s right, ma would have been proud, but don’t be an jerk.

INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT

KITCHEN

Jack’s just about finished cleaning up when Tommy sticks his head in the door.

TOMMY

Everybody’s gone and the place is locked up. Need any help?

JACK

Nope, I got it. See you tomorrow.

As soon as the door shuts, Jack grabs the “FH” labeled loaf of bread and heads out the back door.

EXT. PARKING LOT – NIGHT

Jack carries the loaf of bread like a football as he navigates would-be tacklers in the dark, empty parking lot. Suddenly, he’s engulfed in light, specifically headlights.

A limo pulls up next to Jack, a head slithers from the open back window. Crime boss, DON VITO, 60s, is a snake’s snake.

DON VITO

Jack, I’m glad you’re here. I’ll see you inside.

A funeral home garage door opens for the limo. The funeral home front door opens for Jack.

INT. FUNERAL HOME – NIGHT

In an ornate office, Don Vito sits in a plush chair behind a fancy desk. Jack sits across from him in an uncomfortable folding chair. A large MAN stands next to Jack.

DON VITO

Jack, I see you brought some goodies.

JACK

Stuffed bread.

Jack yanks out the special bread loaf and proudly separates the halves. There’s enough cash to make Don Vito smile, yet he doesn’t.

JACK

We hit a few winners.

DON VITO

I bet. Anything else?

JACK

Sorry I didn’t bring calamari?

DON VITO

I used to love your momma’s calamari.

JACK

It was always fresh.

DON VITO

Like it fell off a truck?

JACK

It jumped in the boat.

Jack waits for a laugh, smile, anything from Don Vito; but it never comes. Don Vito nods and the large man leaves the room. It’s just Jack and the Don.

DON VITO

Anything else?

JACK

I don’t know nothing else. Why?

DON VITO

I hear things, workers talk.

JACK

And what do the workers say?

DON VITO

They say they saw you earlier this evening.

JACK

Unless they came in the restaurant, I don’t know what they’re talking about.

DON VITO

So, you say my men lie to me?

JACK

I didn’t say that.

DON VITO

Then what are you saying cuz no one’s ever lied to me twice.

JACK

I’ve been cooking. I haven’t even been outside.

DON VITO

Not even to take out the trash?

JACK

Nope.

Don Vito pulls Rusty’s milk saucer from a desk drawer. Jack’s poker face belies the wheels turning upstairs.

DON VITO

The milk was still cold.

The two men simply stare at one another. Neither blinks.

DON VITO

And now, I need a favor. From you.

JACK

What is it, Don Vito?

DON VITO

I need you to personally deliver a package on my behalf.

JACK

Where to?

DON VITO

I can promise you beautiful weather, pretty women and new casinos to fine tune your gambling skills.

JACK

I love Atlantic City. And what do I get in return?

DON VITO

Do you know why they call me the Weatherman?

JACK

With two brothers as your family wanted a call me the morticians, meteorologist?

DON VITO

You’re funny. Actually, make that clever, that’s better. They call me the Weatherman for my uncanny knack for predicting when and where lightning will strike.

JACK

What’s the weather forecast?

DON VITO

Still a little cloudy?

JACK

Let’s clear it up. Watch’s the story?

DON VITO

You make the delivery Monday at 2:00 PM sharp. If not, at 2:01, lightning will strike Carmine’s and burn it to the fucking ground.

Jack stews in silence as the Don relaxes in his chair.

[John Budinscak]

Amy,

Thank you – very much! Whatever I can do to return the favor, just ask. I appreciate your help!

Sincerely,

John B.

[Amy Falkofske]

No problem! You’re welcome!