-
Day 6 Assignments
Reply to post your assignment.
-
10 Replies
-
What I learned from this assignment… a high quality fast read that captures a show runners attention must have key elements to sell the pitch bible.
Brigitte Timmerman – Refuge Nation
In a future dystopian world, the environment of the earth is in peril and the U.S. Government is broken down. The United States is fragmented and many Native American tribes have retrieved their broken treaty land back. These tribes have become their own nations completely independent of the United States. They speak their native language, practice their cultural ways and protect themselves from the outside world. Many of the Native Nations’ environments are thriving with fertile land and clean water. They are far better off than the U.S. territories.
Activist Irene along with Jessie, her rebellious younger sister travel with their nine-year-old Nephew Isaac who is half Native American and a seven-year-old Muslim girl Mira. Irene adopted Isaac after her and Jessie’s niece died of a drug overdose when he was two. They took in Mira after her parents were killed when their community was raided. They travel through what is left of the United States and Native Nations in a school bus turned RV and home. They are in search of Isaac’s Native American relatives and Native Nation. Isaac’s ancestor Grandpa Frank, a Native American spirit travels with the family that only Isaac and Mira can see. Irene picks up on Grandpa Frank’s guidance unknowingly and thinks they are her own thoughts.
Irene, Jessie, Isaac and Mira have been forced to live on the road for months after their community was raided and everyone killed including Mira’s parents. Isaac is their key to survival. If they can find what Native Nation Isaac belongs to, the nation will allow the whole family to seek refuge there. They stayed briefly in bleak conditions of a displacement camp. They also survived encounters with raiders. Irene’s sister Jessie puts the family’s safety at risk with her substance abuse and erratic behavior. Irene’s goal is to keep the family safe until they find Isaac’s Native Nation.
A special test is conducted at the Native Nation to find if Isaac has their bloodline. They travel hundreds of miles to Ojibwe Nation and find the test is negative. They then travel to Oglala Lakota Nation and find Isaac does not have or enough of their bloodline to take him and the family in. On their travels the family finds a relative, rancher Calvary Cullom who resides in the Sandhills Nation that claimed it’s independence from the US. The Sandhills Nation is thriving due to they are above one of the largest water reserves in the world. They are extremely protective of their land. Calvary unfortunately cannot take them in at the time due to family politics.
Will the family find Isaac’s Native American family to seek refuge?
-
This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by Brigitte Timmerman.
-
This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by
-
Lesson 6: Opening Summary That Sells the Season
I learned from this assignment that writing a summary as good as the one for Ozark is my goal, and also that improving this summary may require re-thinking of some of my binge-worthy elements.
Phyllis’ Show Summary:
DUNCAN’S FOLLY
One Hour Supernatural Drama
EPA investigator Sasha Lambert has the perfect job to fulfill her calling to fight climate change. It’s her life. She’s even got Price Oil in her crosshairs, with a criminal indictment. She’s riding high. Then it all falls apart when her boyfriend at Justice betrays her to obtain a career-making settlement with Price’s CEO. The condition? Sasha is fired for malfeasance. Now, she is kryptonite in her field. And her meager savings are running out. What she wouldn’t give to be:
Billionaire environmental activist Duncan Price. Black sheep of the oil dynasty that bears his name, he funds climate scientists and supportive politicians and, at night in his mansion, pursues his secret hobby, following stories of suspicious deaths during extreme climate events. He has clippings covering a wall, police investigation style. But it’s not going well. He’s having a fiery argument with his private investigator about his poor performance. After firing him, Duncan surveys the room, distraught.
Sasha is packing up to move in with her mom when she hears a helicopter droning overhead. It’s from Duncan, who wants to meet. Now. Blown away, Sasha finds herself at his mansion, listening to how impressed he was that she caused his sister to pay the biggest fine in company history. He offers her a job, which she assumes will involve his usual endeavors. But after Sasha signs a non-disclosure agreement, Duncan reveals their true mission.
He wants to hire her as an investigator to track down deadly creatures spawned by the build-up of greenhouse gases.
A dumbstruck Sasha listens to him say that he’ll do the killing. And they’ll be doing more than protecting innocent lives; if his theory is correct, these creatures will absorb immense amounts of greenhouse gases when they die. This may be the most important fight against climate change she’ll ever undertake.
Great, the man is delusional. Off her hesitation, Duncan sweetens the deal: if she stays for three years, he’ll fund an environmental foundation for her. Given that carrot, Sasha figures she can do a little humoring.
But how far will she go, and how far will she let Duncan go, in pursuit of these imaginary creatures, especially when they turn out to be real?
-
Mod 2 Lesson 6 Assignment
Bob’s Show Summary
What I learned doing this assignment was to keep plowing forward. Changes keep coming with each lesson and will be reconciled later.
MOUNT MORIAH
One hour drama
Daniel Shay is not your typical intelligence agent (Expertise). Orphaned at thirteen when his parents were shot down my terrorists during his Bar Mitzvah celebration in Jerusalem (Empathy/Distress). Adopted by his uncle in Israel, Daniel vows to do whatever it takes to get revenge for his parents’ murders (Major Scheme Revealed).
Trained and educated by his uncle, Daniel is selected for the elite IDF Talpion program where he excels at mental and physical tasks (Expertise), all the while hiding his festering quest for vengeance. At the commencement of his IDF commitment, Daniel joins the Tel Aviv unit of Mossad (Intriguing World), ostensibly to track and prevent terrorism but secretly planning to use Mossad files to track his parents’ murderer (Secret Identity).
As he gets deeper into anti-terrorism efforts, the trauma from his childhood begins to resurface and he experiences more frequent bouts with depression and PTSD (Undeserved Misfortune). Seeing his Rabbi/therapist is insufficient, and Daniel turns to pills, alcohol, and prostitutes to cope with the depression and PTSD (Coping Mechanism). One of the “prostitutes” he picks up is Christina Wade, a fanatical member of the Temple Mount Society (Secret Identity). Christina’s goal is to manipulate Daniel into helping the society destroy the Dome of the Rock and fulfill Biblical prophesies to bring about the “End of Days.” (Major Scheme Revealed)
Daniel’s bureau chief, Avi, notices Daniel’s instability and has other officers tail him (External Character Conflict). After learning of Daniel’s liaison with Christine, Avi forces her to spy on Daniel for him (External Character Conflict/Twist). Daniel, feeling pressure to find the murderer while he is still functional, takes extra risks when trying to get information from the Mossad database. Almost being caught, Daniel incriminates a fellow officer to take the heat off of himself (Forced Decision They’d Never Make).
The sniper who actually took the shots that killed his parents, Najeh, has now reinvented himself and is a candidate for the Knesset (Twist). Daniel collects information on Najeh as part of his general intelligence but doesn’t connect him with his parents. Najeh wins his seat in the Knesset but shortly thereafter, he meets with terrorists to determine how to best use his position to aid them (Deception/Layer Uncovered).
Riddled with guilt at setting up a fellow officer and worried about being caught, Daniel redoubles his efforts. As he does so, he finds out that Christina is allegedly reporting his activities to Avi (Intrigue). He blows up on Christina in a burst of anger withheld for fifteen years (Shocking Event/Wound).
Daniel confronts Avi who reconciles with him and provides a tip that brings Daniel in touch with a terrorist cell with knowledge of the attack that killed his parents. Daniel separates one of the terrorists from the uncooperative group and tortures him to obtain information (Forced Decision They’d Never Make).
The information received through torture points Daniel at Najeh. Daniel brings this to Avi, who tells him that Najeh has reformed himself and members of the Knesset are untouchable. (Impossible Goal)
(Open Loops) Daniel knows who killed his parents but with Mossad deeming him untouchable, will Daniel ever be able to get revenge? If not, can he live with the anger and depression he’s been holding in? Will Daniel be able to live with the fact he resorted to torture and “behaved like one of them”? Will he be able to form a real relationship with Christina?
(Final Loop/Extreme Dramatic Question) How will Daniel exact revenge for his parents’ deaths. Will Daniel defy Mossad and help Christina with her efforts to bring about the “End of Days.”
-
What I learned doing this assignment is…There are three different versions of the opening summary: PILOT AS INCITING INCIDENT, HIGHLIGHTS OF ENTIRE SEASON, ENGAGE US IN THE MAIN MYSTERY. I chose Pilot method.
Summary: Verna Williams is at the end of her rope. Unemployed, facing foreclosure and needing a liver transplant, she applies for a job too good to be true – Vice President of Special Services with a salary of half-million annual. When she’s selected as one of the final thirteen candidates, she knows she’s the most needy but the least qualified.
Arriving at the corporate facility, all electronic devices are confiscated and strict rules must be observed. The bizarre setting is fifty miles from anywhere. There is no internet, no cell service, no staff and no contact with the outside world for ten days. Their only means of communication is a Panic Button, however, if it’s pressed, no matter what the reason, everyone is disqualified!
The Pilot climaxes when a body of Karen Hodges is found in her bathroom. The death was accidental and surely this must be “thee” exception to pressing the Panic Button? Taking no chances, desperate and with nothing to lose, Verna threatens to kill the first person who tries!
Verna stands her ground and the season is underway when the group votes to put the body in the walk-in freezer for ten days and continue the competition. The rules will be enforced by the candidates themselves as they engage in a series of increasingly stressful “Corporate Games” to determine a winner.
As the season unfolds, it is revealed that the corporation is not what it seems and nobody really knows what the job entails. All bets are off when a second body is found and everybody realizes there’s a Killer among them!
-
This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by H.G. MIDDLEMASS.
-
This reply was modified 3 years, 2 months ago by
-
Kim’s Show Summary
What I learned from this assignment is ways I can follow one clear path to a summary when so many subplots want to take center stage.
One Hour Suspense Drama
Pretending to be an affluent, sophisticated, well-adjusted member of society is a challenging aspect of Natalie Howard’s life. Raised, if you can even call it that, by a mother chained to prostitution and a father imprisoned for selling fentanyl-laced heroin, she’s had to wear metaphorical armor all her life. At age twenty, she was diagnosed with Dissociative identity Disorder. In layman’s terms, Multiple Personality Syndrome. It was her psychiatrist, Eric Howard, that came to the rescue, marrying her and changing her life. She went from dumpster-diving for scraps to lobster and steak meals at the elite Aloha restaurant. There’s still a lot he doesn’t know about her, and she has no intention of telling him. Her past needs to remain in the dark.
But he has his secrets, too. Because he, also, suffers from Dissociative Identity Disorder. His doting mother is the only one who knows, and she’ll do anything to protect him. Anything. And since Eric has no sense of self, despite helping people become mentally stronger, his choices are poor, his judgment cloudy, and his need to escape reality with alcohol much too solid.
When one of Natalie’s personalities attacks Eric in a fit of jealous rage, their lives are upended. Eric’s daughter from his previous marriage is caught in the middle, a fourteen-year-old whose mother doesn’t trust Eric’s new wife not to harm others. But Natalie knows she would never harm Eric, and definitely not the daughter she loves like her own child. Something else is going on. But while Eric is busy pretending everything is fine, Natalie comes to terms with the fact that her multiple personalities are trying to tell her something. Through the help of her new-age friend LaDonna, it becomes evident Natalie’s soul is permanently linked to Eric’s. This isn’t a psychiatric disorder. It’s reincarnation. And the only way her soul can rest is for her to put right the mistakes her soul has made in the past.
Her past-life regression therapist, Claudia, is eager to help Natalie using hypnotism to retrieve past-life memories. Except she has an ulterior motive. She wants to separate Eric and Natalie. Her soul, too, is linked to this couple. She’s known it for years. How perfect that after all this time Natalie has sought her out. Although her Dissociative Identity Disorder has shown a different pathway, it’s still the same story, her personalities linked to Eric and Natalie’s. Her soul meant to co-mingle with Eric’s soul.
With Natalie’s attempted murder charge looming, Eric’s ex-wife’s attempts to obtain full custody of his daughter, a therapist with an agenda, and a multitude of personalities bobbing to the surface, Natalie must drop her armor, and Eric needs to grow a backbone. They can’t repeat the mistakes of their past. They need to make changes for tomorrow.
But then a fourth person arrives. And the secret Natalie has been hiding from Eric all along might be the one that prevents their souls from ever achieving that necessary peace.
-
Lesson 6
Subject: Marcus’s show Summary
What I learned doing this assignment is another piece of the Pitch Bible puzzle.
Trabeus is a kindly old man who everyone in the neighborhood loves. No one knows he’s in witness protection. Or that he’s a contractor to a local gang. And only his henchman, Marius, knows that he is a powerful sorcerer. Trabeus has infiltrated the gang to stop their activities and protect his neighborhood – without the Feds, this time. Marius, a magical indentured servant, wants his long overdue freedom.
Elderly retired witch, Cassandra, feels useless and incompetent in the 21st century. Her spiraling life crisis suddenly comes to a halt. Her archenemy, Trabeus, has partially undone a spell she cast on him many years before. Now it tugs at her. In an effort to locate the evil Trabeus, she uses the spell’s connection to him, but does it badly. Now she’s got a purpose in life, final destruction of Trabeus. It will be her last great contribution to the world. Cassandra has a terminal disease that can’t be cured with medicine or magic. Except for one dark and dangerous spell.
Trabeus, using infallible magic, locates a rival gang member he’s been ordered to interrogate. But he finds, tortures and kills an innocent man. Devastated, he figures out what happened and he knows Cassandra will be after him. Witness protection will slow her down. The fact that his atrocity makes all the local papers will help her – if she can figure out the internet. The fact that her magical connection to him is a two-way street might help him defend himself.
Yet Trabeus is excited by the imminent renewal of hostilities with Cassandra. His old secret lover, Beatrix, is a member of Cassandra’s coven and will surely be assigned to find Trabeus. They can finally be together. Marius may have something to say about that. He lures her and intercepts her on her way to her reunion with long-lost Trabeus.
-
Assignment lesson 6 module 2
Marie’s Show Summary
What I learned doing this assignment is how to write a 1st draft summary and chose one of three possible formats.
I chose « Engage in the main mystery »
CYBER ANGELS
One hour supernatural crime
Skyler, a guardian angel must protect Rose a teen hacker. He failed his previous mission and is haunted by the traumatic memories of the boy he didn’t save. He must redeem himself by saving Rose.
But suddenly, he cannot connect with Rose any more and despite the help of his mentor, and his friends at the school of angels, despite the classes he had on teenage behaviors, he keeps on failing his mission: The harder he works, the more Rose acts devilishly and the more he lies about it to everyone.
Skyler’s arrival at the school of angels has been a mystery and half of the school thinks he is special because of a prediction. The rumor says that he will save the angels from destruction. The other half of the school thinks he is a fallen angel.
Skyler feels he can’t be special with his dylexia, his drive to do bad things and when he starts committing crimes to save Rose and enjoying it, he definitely believes he is a fallen angel.
When he discovers that Fallen Angel have started to inflitrate the world of guardian angels and have embodied half of the students but were unable to embody him, he is confused about his identity again. Is he one of them or is he « chosen » who will save the guardian angels?
The plan of the Fallen angels is to cut human being from celestial protection and destroy earth.
On earth, Skyler must save Rose and stop her from hucking the water’s filtration system in the whole country for a ransom.
At the school of angels, Skyler must save all the students that have been embodied by demons.
Will Skyler believe enough in himself to lead the war against the Fallen angels?
-
Diana’s Show Summary
What I learned: By following the template Hal provided, I was able to see the major turning points much easier and actually changed the story some to make it even better!
1. Choose the Summary Format you like best.
(Engage Us in the Main Mystery)
2. Create an outline using this structure or something similar:
Set up — Character’s normal situation (Jake’s life is miserable)
Twist/Hook
Real situaiton – Major Empathy / Distress (Set up for his wife’s crimes)
Twist/Hook (Wife is a career criminal and married to four other men)
Impossible to solve conflict or major mystery. (Youngest son headed to prison to kill Jake)
Final Hook into the Series – Extreme Dramatic Question (Can Jake and one of Lupe’s other husbands work together to destroy her life?)
3. Turn it into a rough draft.
As Long As We Both Shall Live
One-Hour Drama
IT specialist, Jake Kennedy, has a life filled with normal problems. He’s passed over for a promotion at work; his wife is cheating on him; one of his kids is in juvie; the other is spying on the girl next door; and he is oblivious that his wife is a career criminal who’s setting him up to take the fall for her crimes.
Oh, and Jake’s wife, Lupe, is married to four other men!
Teaming up with her mother, Lupe marries men to bankrupt them and destroy their lives by setting them up to take the fall for her financial crimes as she steals away with a new alias and a fat bank account in search of her next victim. When Jake’s eldest, Carlos, discovers his mom’s secret, he must decide if he should confront her or go further down the rabbit hole she has dug.
But before he can do either his mother’s boyfriend kidnaps him to keep him quiet.
With his dad in prison and his mom AWOL, Carlos learns his brother Mike is getting out of juvie and heading straight for prison…to kill his dad! Unable to warn his father in time, Carlos must do the unthinkable: Kill the boyfriend to save his father.
But Carlos fails and is beaten by the boyfriend and left for dead.
When Carlos wakes up, he discovers his mother has emptied all of their bank accounts and sold all of their assets. With no one else to turn to, Carlos teams up with one of Lupe’s other husbands to free his father and find his mother.
How do two strangers married to the same woman work together to catch (and destroy) their wife?
-
Eric Watterson’s Show Summary
“What I learned doing this assignment is how to create a show summary using specific plot lines.
===========
Summary Format: Pilot as Inciting Incident
===========
Outline using prescribed structure:
Set up – Character’s normal situation – For the last two months, Anthony David a middle-aged man has been treated at the local hospital for total amnesia and has visions of dark creatures beating up a group of young kids. As a way to help him cope, his therapist found him a part-time job as a handyman and grounds keeper.
Twist/Hook: Unknown to him, his amnesia is actually the result of an experimental drug being used by the company LIVE Pharma in charge of his therapy.
Real situation – Major Empathy / Distress: Another side effect of the drug is episodes of painful sycosis, that cause him to see Dark Creatures that no one else can see. He consistently has dreams of dead soldiers that he doesn’t remember and visions of swirls of darkness and dark creatures whispering “Kill Them All.” During one of his episodes, he sees the creature attacking a woman and he steps in to defend her. In doing so, he puts a man in the hospital.
Twist/Hook: As a result of his assault, Anthony is given the option of moving into a Group Home for boys for troubled boys as the handy man and support or face 5 years in jail for assault. funded by LIVE Pharma for further treatment. While in the jail cell, another inmate confronts him and he sees and hears two conversations. one from the man and the other from the darkness around him. He has a dream showing a boy hearing from a father “Soon son.” He sees a vision of Athena man in a battle and he says, “Find it.” Following the images from painful vision, he locates the CENTRY medallion and is immediately attacked by unknown creatures. They chase him into the street and he’s hit by a car. He immediately begin to have visions of boys being hurt and tormented with scream saying “Kill Them All.”
Impossible to solve conflict or major mystery. After being arrested he’s being released into the custody of LIVE Pharma as a groundskeeper. instead of pressing charges the doctor he assisted is requesting his assistance Assist the home counsellor with her experiments or spend time in jail
Final Hook into the Series – Extreme Dramatic Question: After visiting the group home for the first time, he sees the exact boys from his dream sitting in a group with dark creatures floating around them, whispering to each other the words, “Kill Them All.” How can a troubled handyman find peace for himself forced to serve a group of troubled teens.
===================
Rough draft.
Anthony David is a troubled middle-aged man, being treated at the local hospital for total amnesia. However, he is also suffering silently, from painful and troubling dreams and visions of a group of teens being beaten up by dark creatures whispering the words, “Kill Them All.”As part of his therapy, he’s assigned a part-time job as a groundskeeper and handyman. Unknown to him, his amnesia is actually the result of an experimental drug that was used on him by the company his therapist works for.
One day Anthony sees a man abusing his wife surrounded by Dark Creatures. Without thinking, he steps in to defend her. He puts the man in the hospital and is sent to jail. While in the jail cell, another inmate confronts him and he sees and hears two conversations. One from the man and the other from the darkness around him. The two begin to fight in the cell and Anthony makes quick work of him. As he stands over the man surprised of his skills, he’s taken into another painful vision of a strange house, neighborhood and address and a voice speaking to him the words, “Find it.” Following the images from the painful vision, he researches and locates the house and finds a dirty CENTRY medallion underneath dirt and rubble. As soon as he finds it, he’s immediately attacked by dark creatures. The creatures chase him out of the house and into the street and he’s hit by a car. He immediately begins to have visions of boys being chased and beaten while hearing the words, “Kill Them All.” And suddenly wakes up in the hospital.
As a result, Anthony is given the option of moving into a Group Home for troubled boys for more direct counsel and as the home handy man or face 5 years in jail for assault. Feeling like he’s losing his mind, Anthony decides to go to jail or a mental ward to be removed from people. Before taking Anthony to the mental hospital, the arresting officer decides to stop by the group home to visit some of the boys that he knows personally. Anthony reluctantly follows the officer into the group home only to see the exact same boys from his vision talking to the officer as Dark Creatures swirl around them whispering the words, “Kill Them All.”
Anthony is suddenly left with a moral dilemma. Does he run and try to get the mental help he needs, or does he move into this group home full of misguided teens that are being targeted by a horde of dark forces that only he can see?
-
What I learned: Getting interest in a show begins with an intriguing summary.
Series summary of Blank Slate
Joshua Blanks knows he has a lot to be grateful for. His wonderful wife Henna. The sound relationship he has with his daughter Leila. But being cheated out of that Pulitzer and then being downsized from his reporting job hangs over his life like a toxic cloud.
Today, though, his career is looking up. Today, his assignment is to observe a potentially groundbreaking quantum multiverse theory experiment. Something about sending a mouse into an alternative reality. It doesn’t sound all that great, but at least it’s serious, and it makes him feel a little like the respected newsman he once was.
Until the particle accelerator blows up.
Joshua finds himself in another reality where things aren’t as good as in his “baseline” existence. His relationships with Henna and Leila are a mess. He keeps skipping from one random alternative reality to another, perpetually knocking him off balance and forcing himself to fake his way through his own life.
Worse, he’s being pursued by international spies who don’t have his best interests at heart. Worse than that, someone is trying to kill him. And worst of all, that someone is the only person who can help him get back to his baseline life—Prof. Salva Seguir, who led the experiment and died in the explosion, which means she can’t go back to the baseline to take credit for her discovery.
And she blames Joshua.
All Joshua has going for him are his skills as a reporter. But at journalism school, they don’t teach you how to survive spies, navigating your way through a life you haven’t lived—and a vengeful woman with nothing to lose.
Why is all this happening? Because Joshua doesn’t know that he knows something about the experiment that could change the course of the world.
Log in to reply.