• Julia Keefer

    Member
    November 18, 2021 at 10:59 pm

    As I changed my location for my climax to a boat instead of a NYC apartment, I accidentally locked my two protagonists below deck in the empty research lab with the precious Bright Space Brain Buffet. The bad guys were supposed to be poisoned and sacrificed but maybe it was just a sedative. After Litonya and Jake kill Ibrahim and throw him overboard (there is an eco argument about that too), Betty recharges and locks them in the basement instead of sweetly sacrificing herself as planned. How long will she or can she live? Will she keep them locked forever? Can she capsize them or abandon ship and escape to the Caribbean? There is no Internet or phones so they can’t contact their kids. So they are stuck in this CRUCIBLE without a bed–just lab materials and a dorm fridge with oranges, skim milk, and water. Jake takes the drugs but Litonya won’t. That could be the first argument. Then they have a different kind of sex as the neurotransmitters take effect and his penis rises to the occasion but maybe she isn’t as eager as she used to be. They review their lives together. Her Green mission has not been fulfilled. Why won’t she take the drugs? This crucible has suddenly created more questions than answers but I guess that is good to get the audience on the edge of their seats between climax and resolution. It is also an opportunity to deepen the relationship between Jake and Litonya, adding conflict I didn’t want them to have because I wanted to live their perfect relationship. Now I must make myself write all this down in the novel BEFORE I let myself come to a conclusion so I can tease the reader.

  • Armand Petrikowski

    Member
    November 19, 2021 at 6:58 pm

    Armand’s Crucible

    What I learned… “A crucible puts opposing characters in a closed environment where they have to face each other and can’t escape.

    Characters caught in a crucible won’t declare a truce and quit. They’re in it till the end. The key to the crucible is that the motivation of the characters to continue opposing each other is greater than their motivation to run away. Or they can’t run away because they’re in a prison cell, a lifeboat, an army, or a family.”

    Creating a crucible is easy. Consider your story and ask these questions:

    A. What closed environments already exist that can be used as

    crucibles?

    B. Where are the conflicts in the story that would be intensified by

    creating a crucible?

    C. What characters would you like to confront each other and what

    crucible could make that possible?”

    ASSIGNMENT:

    TYLER, THE GHOST

    Traits: Arrogant, Sarcastic, Immature

    Subtext: Scared, in Denial

    LEX, THE GOTH HIGH SCHOOL GIRL

    Traits: Curious, Brave, Sarcastic, Intelligent

    Subtext: Insecure, Lonely

    INT. CLOSET – NIGHT

    Hurried, Lex hides inside and locks the door, she’s more terrified than she’s willing to admit. She holds on tightly to her voice app. Tyler runs through the wall, landing next to Lex.

    LEX

    (whispers)

    That was the killer. Your killer.

    TYLER

    Told you so.

    LEX

    I think we lost him. We need to warn the others.

    Lex reaches for the door knob.

    TYLER

    Wait.

    LEX

    My sister is out there! I have to warn her.

    TYLER

    You’ll die.

    LEX

    So I’ll become a ghost.

    TYLER

    That’s not how it works. You don’t know who moves on and who becomes a ghost.

    LEX

    I can’t let the killer hurt my sister.

    TYLER

    And I can’t let you die.

    LEX

    But you’ll let everyone else die. You’re the coward everyone says you are.

    Tyler jumps inside Lex’s body. He assumes control of her.

    As Lex, Tyler opens the door and exits.

  • John Budinscak

    Member
    November 20, 2021 at 2:46 am

    Budinscak Crucible

    Day 7

    What I learned doing this assignment:

    o Some crucibles are created organically and this is a chance to ramp up the tension and conflict.

    o My scene is the climax and has all the key characters in one place to settle the score.

    2. Characters

    Jack – slick/street smart, selfish, condescending, generous

    Subtext – Conniving

    Don Vito – dictatorial, aloof/arrogant, sneaky, narcissist

    Subtext – Underhanded

    FBI Guy – edgy, all knowing, unscrupulous, agreeable

    Subtext – sneaky

    Setup:

    We’re in Act III, Jack has delivered the package to Burbank and he’s waiting on Don Vito to grant ‘amnesty’.

    For this example, the nephews are with their captor in another room while this takes place. This is an abridged version of the scene to provide this crucible.

    SCENE:

    INT. FUNERAL HOME – DAY

    Don Vito asks one of his men to take Puck and Sal to another room. Jack watches his boys leave the room

    DON VITO

    Jack, you made the delivery on time. I’m impressed.

    JACK

    I told you it’d get done. Where you taking my nephews.

    DON VITO

    To a quiet place.

    JACK

    They’ve done nothing, keep them out of it.

    DON VITO

    Exactly what I intend to do.

    JACK

    When can we go?

    DON VITO

    Jack, Jack, Jack. I promised I wouldn’t burn your restaurant down, but I never said you would go free.

    Off to the side, a door breaks down and the FBI team bursts into the room.

    FBI GUY

    Don’t anybody move.

    DON VITO

    You two. What do you want?

    FBI GUY

    We want what you promised us.

    DON VITO

    You’re going to get what you need.

    Two of Don Vito’s men, guns drawn, appear behind the two FBI agents. They press their guns against the agents’ heads.

    FBI GUY

    Feels like a big caliber weapon

    MAN 1

    It is.

    Click – the unmistakable sound of a shotgun loading. Everyone freezes.

    DRIVER

    Jack, you were right. It was under 3 minutes for everyone to turn on each other.

    Jack’s all smiles. He grabs Man 1’s gun and pushes the guy out of the way.

    DON VITO

    Jack, don’t forget, I kept my …

    JACK

    Shut up.

    Driver and Jack lead the men to the casket display room.

    JACK

    Driver, what are those Porsche digits?

    Driver

    9 1 1.

    JACK

    Exactly. Dial ‘em up.

    Driver smiles and keeps the shotgun leveled on the group as he walks to the funeral home’s main phone and makes the call.

  • Rob Bertrand

    Member
    November 20, 2021 at 10:06 am

    Rob Bertrand’s Crucible

    What I learned: I learned that a crucible puts two opposing characters in a closed environment, where they are forced to face each other.

    Annie Andrews – Protagonist
    Basic character traits: Sarcastic, quick tempered, fragile teenager who aches for acceptance.
    Subtext: Hiding Something. (She’s gay.)

    Danny Laplante – Antagonist
    Basic character traits: Traumatized, delusional, Liar, who’s dangerous.
    Subtext: Plotting/Scheming

    INT. DANNY’S HOSPITAL ROOM – NIGHT

    DANNY’S POV

    Over complete darkness, the deep bass of a muffled heartbeat. Somewhere faint, the steady chirp of hospital equipment.

    Time moves differently, as ghost like figures of nurses and police investigators drift in and out of the room. Their bodies a blur of motion.

    A male shape leans close. His voice deep and drawn out like a half speed recording.

    DETECTIVE
    Danny. I know you can hear me, Danny. I need to ask you a few questions–

    DOCTOR (O.S,)
    — Detective, please. He’s in no shape…

    The voice falls away as the darkness overtakes Danny. A new voice, familiar and motherly.

    DANNY’S MOM (O.S.)
    (whispers)
    They gave you the good stuff…I made sure of it, hon. My sweet boy.

    The darkness begins to lift. Eye’s blink away the cobwebs of drowsiness.

    Danny’s eye’s snap open to reveal Annie, standing in the shadows at the foot of his hospital bed. Her face is calm.

    END DANNY’S POV

    Danny lays in a hospital bed, under blankets. The hatchet now removed from his shoulder, replaced by bandages that are now seeping blood.

    ANNIE
    (seething)
    Hello, Danny.

    DANNY
    (weak)
    A…ann…Annie? I knew…I knew you’d come…for me. I knew you…come back to me.

    ANNIE
    Shut the fuck up, Danny. You need to listen.

    A flash of anger, as Danny lunges for Annie only to find both hands handcuffed to the bed.

    There is no fear

    ANNIE
    Whatever this is? It’s over.

    DANNY
    Don’t say that….don’t! We’re meant…to be….together!

    ANNIE
    No, Danny.

    DANNY
    (screams)
    You don’t say no, to me!
    (sweetly)
    I know you, Annie. I know you better than anyone. You…need me! I’m the only one who gets you.

    ANNIE
    No, Danny! You don’t get me. You will never get me. This…this is the last time we will ever speak. This…is the last time you will ever see me. So, I want you to listen, very carefully. Leave…me…alone. Leave my family alone! Stay far away from us. Do you understand, Danny? I’m telling you, no. To be crystal fucking clear…I do not want to be with you. I do not want to be your friend. And you certainly ain’t my fucking mom! You need to get this in your sick head. Fuck no, Danny. You need to listen when a girl says no. You…are not allowed to do this to me. Or anyone!

    DANNY
    (sweetly)
    I’ll convince you. You’ll see…

    ANNIE
    I’m warning you, Danny. Stay the fuck away from me and my family.

    DANNY
    (angry)
    Or what? What are you gonna do, Annie!?

    ANNIE
    I’ll kill you.

    Danny laughs and winces at the pain.

    DANNY
    Don’t…don’t make me laugh…

    ANNIE
    I’m not afraid of you, Danny.

    DANNY
    You will be.

    Now Annie laughs.

    ANNIE
    I know you can’t hear this right now. But you need help Danny. Real help. You’re mentally ill, dude. Luckily, the prison will see that you get the therapy you need.

    DANNY
    (angry)
    Therapy?! Everyone’s answer to the fucked-up things we do to each other is therapy! My daddy…he could’a used therapy. Maybe it would’ve prevented him from touchin’ me all those years. Oh…yeah…mommy knew. But she didn’t fuckin’ care! Because when he was busy with me…she wasn’t taking a beating. Is that why I’m crazy, you think? Is that why they sent me to Dr. Horen? Ten years old, spillin’ my guts out to a man I was told was an authority figure. He sure did love those stories about my dad! Used to make me tell them…while he was raping me. Over and over….

    Tears fall down Danny’s cheeks.

    ANNIE
    Oh my god, Danny…did you…did you tell someone?

    DANNY
    Everyone! You think they believed? You think they believed a troubled, ten year old punk…like me? They laughed and sent me back. And when he finally got busted…you know what they said? They said…this kid’s gonna need…therapy.

    ANNIE
    I’m sorry Danny.

    DANNY
    Why can’t you love me?!

    Annie walks to the door.

    DANNY (CONTINUED)
    Why! Why can’t you love me?!

    Without looking back.

    ANNIE
    Goodbye, Danny.

    With that, she’s gone.

    DANNY
    Annie! Come back! Annie?

    CUT TO:

  • Amy Falkofske

    Member
    November 20, 2021 at 3:50 pm

    Amy’s Crucible

    What I learned doing this assignment is this technique is better if the situation that the characters are in forces an issue. That’s not what happened in this scene. Anyway, I can see how this adds suspense and makes a scene more interesting.

    Andrea

    Basic character traits: well-spoken, image conscience, playful, competitive

    Want/Need: Wants to become a network anchor, wants Josh and her kids back, needs to feel validated

    Paradoxes: Wants to be a good wife and mother but also wants a demanding career

    Secret: She once gave a co-worker the wrong directions to a story location so that she could beat her to the story

    Flaw: She can be selfish

    Special: She was the ugly duckling at school until her braces came off and her acne went away, then she became one of the popular girls.

    Subtext: concealing

    Josh

    Basic character traits: inquisitive, honest to a fault, dad jokes, his kids’ biggest cheerleader

    Want/need: Wants to do right by the people in his life, needs to feel like he’s number one to his partner

    Paradoxes: He is a hardcore rule follower, tough on crime, but also a softie when it comes to his family

    Secret: He once hid the details of a crime to keep a family from being torn apart.

    Flaw: Has a temper

    Special: He comes from a long line of men who were notoriously good at solving crimes.

    Subtext: polite

    INT. AIRPLANE – DAY

    Andrea and Josh sit across from one another. Andrea looks into the TV camera being held by the CAMERAMAN.

    ANDREA

    Ladies and gentlemen, as promised, I’m about to jump out of this plane, and I’ve got my husband Josh here for moral support. Are you ready for this Josh?

    JOSH

    Anything for you, honey.

    Andrea giggles.

    ANDREA

    I’ll take that as a yes.

    The INSTRUCTOR walks up to them.

    INSTRUCTOR

    All right! You two are next!

    Andrea looks into the camera.

    ANDREA

    Oh, dear. Here we go.

    Andrea stands up and grabs Josh’s hand.

    They walk to the big opening on the side of the plane, the camera following them.

    INSTRUCTOR

    Okay. Josh, you go first. Then Andrea immediately after.

    Andrea looks nervously at the camera.

    ANDREA

    Okay.

    INSTRUCTOR

    Go!

    Josh tentatively jumps and he’s gone.

    INSTRUCTOR

    Okay, Andrea. Go!

    Andrea hesitates a few seconds but then jumps.

    ANDREA

    Aaaahhh!

    EXT. SKY – DAY

    Both Andrea and Josh a freefalling some distance away from each other but close enough to hear each other yelling.

    JOSH

    Honey, are you okay.

    His parachute deploys.

    ANDREA

    Uh… I think so.

    Andrea’s parachute deploys.

    JOSH

    I’ve got something to tell you.

    ANDREA

    What?

    JOSH

    I hired a nanny.

    ANDREA

    What? Why? Who is it?

    JOSH

    Her name is Meagan. She’s a TA at the university.

    ANDREA

    You’re telling me this now?

    JOSH

    You’re never around to talk to.

    ANDREA

    Unhire her.

    JOSH

    I’m not going to do that.

    They approach a green meadow.

    ANDREA

    I don’t want some stranger in my house and spending time with my children.

    JOSH

    Well, there’s another option.

    ANDREA

    What’s that?

    JOSH

    You could spend time with them.

    Josh flutters to the ground while Andrea still floats through the air.

    Andrea has a scowl on her face.

    Then she lands a few feet away from Josh.

    A WOMAN comes over to help them out of their parachutes.

    Andrea shrugs out of hers and storms off.

  • Michelle Damis

    Member
    November 21, 2021 at 12:09 am

    PS 80 Michelle Damis Crucible

    What I learned doing this assignment is that I already have three crucibles already lined up in the 3<sup>rd</sup> act (one is probably technically the end of the 2<sup>nd</sup> act.)

    I have Ted the vampire and Nina alone in her apartment. He knows that she knows he is a Vampire, but she doesn’t know he knows. He will confess and tell her he is leaving etc…(he will have a little fun in the process)

    Ted and Jim will have to team up to save Marin and Nina, they will be mostly in a car making the journey to find them and Ted will be confessing all to Jim and Jim will ask lots of questions

    Marin and Nina will be trapped together by the vampires and thinking they will die. Both confess their secrets and bury the hatchet (so to speak).

    I’m not ready to write these scenes yet as so much that happened prior will flavor them, but I’m thrilled to know that I was on the right track in setting these situations up to begin with.

  • Janeen Johnson

    Member
    November 21, 2021 at 7:54 pm

    Janeen’s Crucible

    What I learned from doing this assignment was that putting people in a snow globe guarantees they’ll fight endlessly – or until one dies.

    Scene essence: Daniel berates and slaps around Amber for trying to escape from him and steal his kids while not keeping their private matters private. Says his reputation will suffer because of her and she would have nothing without him. She whimpers.
    Characters:

    Daniel Richards

    Basic Character Traits: <div>

    Temperamental artist

    Insecure

    Incredibly good designer

    Perfectionist

    Subtext Character Traits: Cloaking, Vengeful

    Logline: Daniel is a fashion designer who finds himself venting his frustrations with his clients on his submissive wife but Morgan is somehow empowering his wife to defy him and that must stop.

    Possible areas of subtext: Obsequiously bows to his clients’ wishes in fashion. Gets as nitpicky with his wife at home as he feels his clients are with him. Hates anyone who challenges his right to be absolutely, unequivocally in charge at home.

    Amber Richards

    Basic Character Traits:

    Loving

    Gentle

    Long-suffering

    Fiercely protective of her kids

    Subtext Character Traits: Intimidated, Secretive

    Logline: Amber is a good mother and must find the courage to protect herself and her children from her vicious husband before he kills them.

    Possible areas of subtext: Pretends she is in control in front of her children no matter what Daniel is doing to her.

    SCENE

    INT. RICHARDS HOME – DINING ROOM – EVENING

    DANIEL and AMBER sit quietly at the formal dining table, remnants of dessert are at their places. Amber is quietly looking at her plate while Daniel is leaning back in his chair, master of all he sees.

    DANIEL

    Let’s have coffee in the conservatory.

    AMBER

    Of course. I’ll fetch it.

    She rises from the table, picks up the dessert plates and moves soundlessly to the kitchen.

    Daniel stretches out a bit more, languidly surveying th eroom, fixing on Amber’s place at the table.

    After a few moments, he abruptly gets up and exits to the conservatory.

    INT. RICHARDS HOME – CONSERVATORY – CONTINUOUS

    DANIEL stands at one of the large windows, surveying the grounds, beautifully and subtly backlit. He turns when AMBER enters, carrying a tray with coffee and cups.

    Daniel motions to a low table in front of a dainty sofa by the windows. He steps into the center of the room as Amber sets it down.

    Standing between Amber and the door to the room, he pins Amber with his gaze when she has deposited the tray on the table.

    AMBER

    (haltingly)

    Would you like something more to go with the coffee?

    Daniel pauses a beat.

    DANIEL

    Come here, dear.

    Fear rises in Amber’s eyes, but she moves, zombie-like, toward him in the middle of the room.

    She stands, her arms limp at her side, in front of him.

    He backhands her to the face and she reels, clutching her cheek.

    DANIEL

    Don’t you EVER run away to a shelter again and disgrace me in front of my clients.

    AMBER

    (shrinking away)

    I didn’t.

    Daniel looms over her.

    DANIEL

    Do you deny being at a women’s shelter today? Do you?

    AMBER

    No. Like I told Mrs. Day, I was there to drop off some of the children’s old clothes. They appreciate our children’s nice things so much and it’s a lovely tax deduction for things the kids have grown out of.

    Daniel raises his hand again and Amber shrinks further.

    DANIEL

    Did she ask about the bruises?

    Amber shakes her head yes.

    DANIEL

    And what did you say?

    AMBER

    (pleading)

    I told her that I tripping bringing the kids’ things down the stairs to prep them to donate. She knows how clumsy I am. She totally believed me.

    DANIEL

    Why wouldn’t she believe you? It’s the truth, isn’t it?

    Amber looks everywhere around the room for a response and finally settles on the floor at her feet.

    AMBER

    Of course it’s the truth.

    DANIEL

    It’s the truth, alright.

    DANIEL

    If you try to blame me in any way for your clumsiness, I’ll lose business and you’ll lose all of this. All of it. And if you ever go to that shelter again, I’ll take the kids away from you and throw you out in the gutter and you’ll never see them again.

    Amber whimpers, cowering.

    Daniel pulls her up by one arm to stand directly in front of him. She dares not look him in the eye.

    DANIEL

    You will never —

    He back hands her face again.

    DANIEL

    Ever —

    He punches her in the gut and she doubles over.

    DANIEL

    Risk my career and reputation again like that, will you?

    He grabs her by the neck and pulls her up to him.

    DANIEL

    Will you?

    AMBER

    (whimpering)

    No, never. Never.

    He lets go of her and she crumples to the floor.

    Daniel takes a deep breath, closes his eyes for moment and then relaxes. Stepping to the sofa and table.

    DANIEL

    Drink your coffee. I know you hate cold coffee.

    AMBER

    (still whimpering)

    Yes, Daniel.

    </div>

  • Emmanuel Sullivan

    Member
    November 23, 2021 at 8:08 pm

    Emmanuel’s Crucible

    What I learned doing this assignment is crucible scenes are crucial and I love them when done well in movies. To put the protagonist and antagonist in proximity and force them to confront each other is great entertainment.

  • Elizabeth Koenig

    Member
    November 26, 2021 at 1:49 am

    What I learned: a crucible intensifies the emotions

    Elizabeth’s Kitchen crucible

    GRACE: Basic traits: Hard-working; playful/creative/musical; positive/enthusiastic; SUBTEXT: works too hard so people won’t leave her (changes)

    Mike: loves simply; salesman – can sell water to a fish (if he’s sober); Fun; Impulsive/addictive (changes – modulated) SUBTEXT: good at learning and changing, if he’s given direction.

    Christopher: subtext: avoids feelings-like Ed, which makes him lethargic (changes); Caring; Brilliant in computer science; passive-aggressive

    INT. LINDA’S KITCHEN

    Dishes in the sink. Appliances smothered in Adam’s sewing.

    GRACE

    (Desperate – to Mike)

    How can I make dinner in here?

    MIKE

    (Thinking)

    Well. We agreed to not shut down his creative impulses—

    Mike lifts a fabric piece, that’s becoming a lovely suit—

    MIKE

    (Proud and jazzed)

    And it’s for our wedding!

    Only, it strikes her like lightening—

    GRACE

    (Livid)

    How can YOU make dinner in here?

    Mike’s momentarily confused, before he remembers—

    MIKE

    OH. Yeah. Disrespectful that you do all the cooking. I’m sorry, Grace—

    Except, this belated acknowledgement of years of inequity—Grace starts to wail. Before, suddenly, she-

    Hucks a dirty pan across the room. CRASH!

    MIKE

    (Dodging noodles from last night’s dinner)

    Jesus!

    Now it’s a potholder. An apple, as Grace’s shrieks. A growing wave of fury—

    GRACE

    I hunt! I gather! I cook! I clean!

    A spoon hits a chair. An opener smacks the fridge.

    GRACE

    I do everything! Why is it all me?

    A fork. Anything Grace finds that won’t shatter and make her life yet worse. As—

    Linda, enters, gets smacked by an orange peel.

    LINDA

    What the—

    More realized rage as Grace faces her mother—

    GRACE

    How are YOU going to make dinner in here?

    Linda is deeply perplexed. Retreats to the doorframe —

    LINDA

    You’re the one who makes dinner.

    GRACE

    I do. I DO. And why IS that?

    Linda looks at Mike. She’s never thought about it either.

    LINDA

    Because you like to?

    Grace, mid-apple windup. Wants to nail her mother. But—

    GRACE

    Jesus!

    Sends it splattering the basement doorframe, before

    Christopher emerges, apple in his hair.

    CHRISTOPHER

    What’s—?

    MIKE

    (Calmly. Echos Ed)

    An expressive moment.

    Which sends Grace into the stratosphere—

    GRACE

    Expressive? You haven’t seen anything yet!

    Grace raises an entire dish rack of clean glasswear as—

    Adam and Kristian appear in the remaining doorframe. You can practically hear everyone’s sweat before—

    Grace surprisingly’s totally defused. Slides to the floor. Arms cradling the rack, like it holds the world’s children. Keeping it entirely safe as—

    Her enormous sobs bring Mike to his knees beside her—

    MIKE

    It’s okay, it’s okay

    And, Adam and Kristian at the same time—

    ADAM AND KRISTIAN

    Mom! It’s okay.

    And, as Linda, slips, silent into the shadows of her bedroom—

    An expression we’ve never seen on Christopher’s face. Like his pilot light has suddenly been relit.

    CHRISTOPHER

    (Grabs keys off the counter.)

    I’m done.

    Looks at Grace—

    CHRISTOPHER

    We’re done, sister.

    Ruffles the kids’ heads as Christopher walks past and we—

    Hear the front door open. Shut.

  • Robert Smith

    Member
    November 27, 2021 at 9:19 pm

    PS80 DAY 7 BOB SMITHS CRUCIBLE

    What I learned doing this assignment was…?

    A crucible is necessary for a dramatic story and mine has one: Is it morally wrong to collaborate with enemy when it is the only means to save your own and the life of others?

    CRUCIBLE SCENE:

    Character traits, subtext and Character Loglines:

    EMIL JANNINGS: His traits are that he is Jealous, imperious, fearful (about his possible

    loss of star-status and for his future career). Subtext: Deceitful and manipulative.

    MARLENE DIETRICH: Her Traits: Ambitious, creative, subservient (to director, von Sternberg). Subtext: Domineering (publicly); subservient to von Sternberg; contemptuous of Jannings.

    JOSEF von STERNBERG: Traits: Perfectionist, artistic, exacting.

    Subtext: Demanding.

    KURT GERRON: He plays the Magician in “The Blue Angel.” Traits: Affable, amiable; Subtext: Conciliatory.

    HANS ALBERS: He plays Mazepa the strongman in “The Blue Angel” Traits: Intelligent, cautious. Subtext: conceals rather than speaks.

    DR. MAGNUS HIRSCHFELD: Known as a sexologist and first ever gay advocate in Germany who also advocates for a more sexually open society. Traits: caring, father-like, warm, and very smart. Subtext: Wants things to be right and for the good in a society that is becoming more Nazi.

    The Crucible question is: Is it morally permissible to collaborate with an enemy (the Nazis) if it is to protect your own life and the lives of others?

    BACKSTORY TO THE SCENE: Marlene Dietrich is treating director von Sternberg and fellow cast members to a night on the Berlin cabaret scene. They are in the Club Silhouette, a gay cabaret frequented by show people of all orientations. Suddenly,

    INT. THE CLUB SILHOUETTE – NIGHT

    Emanating from the street outside are the sounds of a marching army. They are the NAZI BROWN SHIRTS who keep march to the tune of the Horst Wessel which they sing.

    They halt and stop singing. Next, with curses they hurl rocks through the windows of the club. Glass shatters. The crowd is paralyzed into fearful silence. .

    Outside, the Brown Shirts come to order and march forward, again, singing the Horst Wessel. The sounds come to an end.

    The crowd in the Club Silhouette is relieved.

    Hirschfeld speaks his mind.

    HIRSCHFELD

    Luckily no one is injured. But when the Nazis take

    over – which I fear is inevitable – homosexuals and

    Jews will be amihiliated. And I am both.

    GERRON

    I am also a Jew. And these scum of the earth Nazis

    say they are the Master Race. Is it time to go back

    to Palestine.

    HIRSCHFELD

    I am going there next year. I am not religious

    but I want to see the land of our heritage. I don’t

    think I’ll stay. The Arabs don’t want us there,

    even though Jews have lived in the land for thousands

    of years, they are killing us.

    ALBERS

    Well, this effects me. The love of my life is Jewish.

    GERRON

    I didn’t realize Hansi was Jewish.

    HIRSCHFELD

    My advice to you is take Hansi and leave Germany.

    ALBERS

    I can’t live in any other country but Germany – bad

    as it may become..

    HIRSCHFELD

    Then send Hansi abroad for her own safety and hopefully

    meet later.

    JANNINGS

    I am in a similar situation to Hans: My mother is

    of Jewish origin. I too need to stay here but how do

    I survive the Nazis?

    HIRSCHFELD

    First of all, tell no one about your mother.

    (to Albers)

    Same with Hansi. Then, I recommend for your own

    sake and the sake of your loved ones, that you

    pretend to support the Nazis. You are actors, make

    a few films for the Nazis.

    JANNINGS

    In other words, hide in the open?

    GERRON

    How far do you go in cooperating with an enemy

    when it’s to save you life and the life of your

    family? What is morally permissible? I wonder

    what a Rabbi would say.

    JANNINGS

    About what?

    GERRON

    Is it permissible to collaborate with an enemy

    in order to save your life and life of your loved

    ones?

    ALBERS

    I would like to know his answer.

    JANNINGS

    So would I. I”d like to know the

    judgement of a Rabbi.

    GERRON

    I’ll ask my Rabbi. He is a great ethicist.

    STERNBERG

    I am not religious, but I am a Jew. This puts me with

    all of you in a moral struggle. I’d like to know what a

    Rabbi says. Fortunately, for me, the matter is decided.

    As soon as we finish “The Blue Angel,” I can get out of

    Germany and go home to America, to Hollywood – half a world away from

    Herr Hitler and his degenerate mob of Nazi nuts!

    DIETRICH

    Take me with you.

    STERNBERG

    With Rudi’s permission, of course.

    DIETRICH

    Of course.

    (to Hirschfeld, Jannings, Albers, and Gerron)

    Rudi’s my husband.

    STERNBERG

    Rudi must come with us. We can get him a

    job as an Assistant Director.

  • Pablo Soriano

    Member
    December 1, 2021 at 7:13 am

    Pablo’s Crucible

    What I learned: This is challenging because my three main characters never actually meet face to face. So… the best I can come up with is Irma having no choice but to tell her sons that their father is dead. Technically, Irma and Antonio are opposing characters. One of them has to consider turning back in order for there to be some sort of crucible. If they go back, they are then forced to work for the casino or worse. If they get caught by the border patrol, same outcome.

    The family takes shelter in an abandoned home. They sit around a small fire made from old furniture as firewood. Irma hands the last sip of water to Andres as he munches on the last piece of bread.

    ANTONIO: I want to go home.

    ANDRE: Me too.

    Irma says nothing.

    ANTONIO: Maybe dad is looking for us.

    Irma remains silent.

    ANTONIO: Mom-

    IRMA: We can’t go back.

    ANTONIO: Why not? Dad-

    IRMA: Enough!

    Antonio stands and heads for the door.

    IRMA: Antonio. Don’t!

    ANTONIO: If we get caught we will just be sent back. They’ll probably have some food and water for us at the detention center.

    Antonio has his hand on the knob.

    IRMA: If we go back, I’m as good as dead.

    Antonio pauses.

    ANTONIO: What?

    Irma stands as she looks at her two young sons.

    ANTONIO: What are you talking about?

    IRMA: Antonio. There’s no easy way to say this. But… Your father was killed.

    Andres is frozen. Antonio turns to face his mother.

    ANTONIO: What?

    IRMA: Your father got in trouble with some really bad people. They meant to only hurt him. They went too far.

    ANTONIO: Dad is… Dead?

    Andres begins to cry. Irma holds him.

    IRMA: I’m so sorry, baby.

    ANTONIO: Why didn’t you tell us?

    Irma doesn’t answer.

    ANTONIO: Wait. Those men at the station… They wanted to… kill us?

    IRMA: No. They want to recruit you. They want to turn you into one of them. But now… Now that we ran away… I’m not sure what they’ll do to us if we go back.

    Antonio’s mouth is agape. He slowly looks to the floor.

    ANTONIO: Mom. What the hell!?

    He paces and eventually slumps to the floor against the wall on the other side of the room.

    IRMA: We have to make it across.

    Andres is sobbing now.

    ANTONIO: You bitch.

    IRMA: Antonio!

    ANTONIO: Why didn’t you tell us?

    IRMA: How does a mother tell her children that we are running for our lives?

    Antonio is fuming.

    IRMA: We can do this.

    ANTONIO: Well we don’t have a choice, do we?

    Beat.

    IRMA: No. We don’t.

    ANDRES: Mama. I don’t want to die.

    Irma closes her eyes and fights back tears.

    IRMA: I’m not going to let anything happen to you, baby.

    She looks to Antonio for help.

    IRMA: We have to work together, we can do this.

    There’s a long moment of silence.

    ANTONIO: We need to rest. We have a better chance at avoiding the drones if early in the day. While they recharge their batteries.

    Antonio stands and walks towards his family.

    ANTONIO: Andres. I’m going to need your help.

    ANDRES: But-

    ANTONIO: Do you think you can make some weapons for us? A hammer or a mace? Something to swing.

    Andres stops crying.

    ANDRES: We’ll need rocks. And something to tie them.

    ANTONIO: We’ll have to use what we have.

    Antonio grabs a cinder block and throws it against the wall. It startles his mother and his brother. He takes off his shoes and socks. He then hands Andres his walking stick, a chunk of broken cinder block and one of his stocks.

    ANTONIO: You think you can make something with this?

    ANDRES: Maybe. What are we going to do?

    ANTONIO: Just trust me. Let’s get some sleep. But tomorrow morning, you’ll start making me something I can use to bash these drones.

    Beat.

    ANDRES: Your socks stink.

    ANTONIO: Shut up.

    IRMA: Antonio. Don’t-

    Antonio gives her a cold, indifferent stare. She nods.

    IRMA: Your brother is right. Let’s get some rest.

  • Jodi Harrison

    Member
    December 13, 2021 at 12:09 am

    Jodi’s Crucible – Day 7

    Crucibles are used to create dramatic tension, and they are often in the third act. With a closed environment where the characters can’t leave and must confront each other, crucibles create tension and elevate suspense. It is also a good opportunity for a character to have to confront their fear. Crucibles can be scenes or in the entire story.

    CHARLENE: Quiet, Proper Subtext: Leader

    ED: Fear of Heights, Positive Subtext: Non-confrontational

    BRUCE: Tough, no class Subtext: Opportunist

    STU: Tweaker, amoral Subtext: Shock value

    Charlene and Ed are pretty good kids. They recently graduated from High School and decided to take a ski day together. Unfortunately, they are forced to ride the ski lift with Bruce and Stu who are idiots, and only care about how much they can intimidate others, they have no filter and just care about a good time. Ed has a fear of heights.

    EXT. MOUNTAIN DEW SKI LIFT – MORNING

    Charlene and Ed are anxious to start skiing. They head towards the ski lift. Two tweakers, Bruce and Stu are in front of them sans skis and it looks like Charlene and Ed will have to share the lift with them.

    ED:

    Char, how’d you like to hike up? I’m not feeling the lift right now.

    CHARLENE:

    We’ll get there faster and have a lot more time to ski if we brave it.

    ED:

    You know it freaks me out a bit, being that high without my feet touching the ground.

    CHARLENE:

    This is a good time to conquer that fear, we won’t be that far from the ground.

    ED:

    Maybe next time, but those guys creep me out too.

    CHARLENE:

    Eh, don’t let those tweakers bother you, they’re harmless. I went to school with the tall one.

    Ed is ambivalent but follows Charlene. They reach the lift Operator.

    ED:

    Can we have our own chair?

    LIFT OPERATOR:

    Sorry, four to a chair, thems’ the rules when we’re backed up.

    CHARLENE:

    Well, he’s got a little fear of heights.

    LIFT OPERATOR:

    The hike path is to the west of here, it’s not that far.

    ED:

    All good, man.

    Charlene looks at Ed, he begrudgingly nods okay.

    The chair swings around where the four of them are standing, they all hop on. Ed is on the outside, hugging onto the railing. They are in total silence as the chair lift climbs higher.

    CHARLENE:

    So, Bruce, how’s everything going?

    Bruce looks quizzically at her.

    CHARLENE:

    I’m Charlene Frannell. I was in your senior class.

    Bruce nods.

    BRUCE:

    You that girl who narced on my friend?

    CHARLENE:

    What?

    Bruce looks at Ed through his glassy eyes.

    BRUCE:

    No, he’s the one.

    CHARLENE:

    He didn’t go to our school.

    BRUCE:

    Must’ve been somebody else.

    Trying to be a part of the conversation while facing outward.

    ED:

    So, you guys skiing today?

    STU:

    Man, you two ask a lot of questions.

    Stu brings out a pint of whiskey and takes a gulp.

    BRUCE:

    We’re zip lining.

    Bruce takes a gulp after Stu.

    ED:

    Oh, that’s cool.

    STU:

    Why’d sit so far away chica? We don’t bite.

    Stu makes an obscene gesture to Charlene. She and Ed muster appeasement. Ed stares out at the trees biding his time on the chair lift.

    BRUCE:

    Whooohooo!

    STU:

    Badass fucking view, right?

    Charlene rolls her eyes.

    BRUCE:

    Fuck yeah! I’d like to do a chick up here, the quarter mile high club right!? How bout you Char (beat) Char, Char.

    Bruce grabs for Charlene’s breasts, she screams. Tipsy, Bruce and Stu laugh out of control. Bruce fires up a joint. Charlene hugs into Ed. Ed shouting to them with his eyes closed while he faces outward. Ed tries to let go of the railing to protect Charlene, but quickly grasps the railing again. Charlene is on her own.

    ED:

    I’m glad you’re having fun, but can you lighten up on the language, there’s a lady present.

    STU:

    Chill dude.

    Bruce starts swaying forward and backward as if on a large swing.

    BRUCE:

    If I’m rockin’ don’t come knockn’. Whooohooo!

    STU:

    You pussy, you gotta stand up and put your body into it if you want to rock!

    Stu stands up and grabs the right side of the railing. Ed, fearing he’ll fall off wraps his arms around the left side of the railing, Charlene wraps her arms around Ed. Stu starts moving back and forth trying to get the chair to really swing wide.

    ED:

    (shouts)

    That’s enough! Stop it! We’re 500 feet in the air you idiot!

    STU:

    What’d you call me!?

    Stu reaches over Bruce and Charlene and lunges at Ed. Stu grabs the back of his jacket and yanks him towards him over Charlene and Bruce’s laps. Ed loses his grip on his skis and one falls to the ground down below, shattering into pieces.

    BRUCE:

    What the fuck! Stop it! Get the fuck back you guys! You guys need to chill.

    Reacting, Ed turns towards Stu.

    ED:

    Look what you did you asshole. You’re gonna pay.

    STU:

    (laughing)

    I’m gonna pay huh? Pussy, you can’t even let go of that rail, I’m gonna pay.

    Charlene is crying silently, hugging onto Ed. The chair lift system shuts down and stops. They all go quiet. The chair is still swinging uncontrollably, Stu and Ed slowly sit back.

    A half hour goes by but seems like an eternity sitting high atop the ground in the chair lift. Patrol at the bottom cruise by in their snowmobile.

    SKI PATROL PERSON:

    Folks, it’s gonna be okay, we’ll be up and running in a few minutes.

    A half hour goes by and they’re still stuck on the slope. Bruce starts to try to stand but still slightly drunk and high he sways back and forth. They all react.

    ED

    Stop it.

    CHARLENE:

    What’da think you’re doing?

    STU

    Asshole get down!

    BRUCE:

    This thing ain’t never going to start and I gotta piss!

    Bruce seems to be standing carefully and slowly, he unzips his pants and pulls out his penis. Stu thinks he’ll be funny and give Bruce a little scare and jerks the chair lift. Bruce screams and tries to grab the railing but misses. He’s starting to fall off the chair backwards, quick thinking Charlene grabs one leg and Stu grabs the other. Bruce is dangling and swaying in the air. He is now screaming and trying to fight the fall by wiggling.

    CHARLENE:

    Bruce, relax, don’t wiggle, we’ve got your legs, just try to rock high like if your on a swing set.

    STU:

    Yeah, dude, we got you.

    Bruce starts swinging slightly and then building more momentum he swings higher. Unfortunately, since his pants are unzipped nothing is holding Bruce in at this point. Both Charlene and Stu’s hands are slipping on his loose levis.

    BRUCE:

    Hold on. Don’t let me die, I don’t wanna die.

    Charlene and Stu try frantically to keep holding on to Bruce’s pants.

    CHARLENE:

    We got you. Keep swinging Bruce.

    As soon as Charlene says this, she and Stu feel empty levis. Bruce screams to his death.

    ED:

    Bruce, Oh my God!

    Stu is stunned into silence. Charlene loses it, she wails in fear of what just happened.

    ED:

    Oh my God, Oh my God, you just killed Bruce!

    STU:

    No, I didn’t, it was an accident. He slipped.

    ED:

    He slipped because you were jerking the railing!

    STU:

    No, I didn’t. He slipped, he was drunk and high.

    Charlene:

    Yeah, couldn’t you have thought of that BEFORE you jerked the rail, he’s DEAD!

    Stu pulls out a switchblade and opens it revealing a sharp blade as he threatens them both.

    STU:

    Look, he fell, he did it. I didn’t. And it you say any differently, you’re dead too.

    They all stop in their tracks. The ski lift starts moving again. They all sit back staring straight ahead in silence.

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