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Day 8 Assignments
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PS80 DAY 8 BOB SMITHS CHARACTER OUTLINE
“What I learned doing this assignment is…?”
Weaving character into the outline is a shortcut to discovering the direction of a story and where and how certain character components can be revealed to impel the story.
ASSIGNMENT 1
Add character arc parts I like to the outline.
These are included in the additions to the outline in Assignment 2 in bold.
ASSIGNMENT 2
NOTE: There is a dramatic triangle here (Emil Jannings, Josef von Sternberg, and Marlene Dietrich. Accordingly, the character arcs of all three are weaved into the outline, below in bold.
OPENING:
Title: Berlin – American Sector, July, 1945.
EXT: US ARMY HEADQUARTERS –
Brandishing an Oscar statuette, Emil Jannings (now 60) presents himself at US Army headquarters shouting, “Don’t shoot! I won an Oscar!” Jannings seeks asylum from the Soviets in the free (Allied) sector of Berlin. Jannings: I didn’t survive 12 years under Hitler just to live the rest of my life under Stalin.”
INT. OFFICE US ARMY HEADQUARTERS – DAY
INCITING INCIDENT: A US Army intake Officer, who is a film buff wants to know what it was like filming “The Blue Angel” and why an actor and man of Jannings’ stature allowed himself to be exploited by the Nazi propaganda film industry to which Jannings replies by telling the story of this film, but in regard to allowing himself to be exploited in Nazi propaganda films, Jannings’ answer is one word: SURVIVAL.
INT. SCREENING ROOM – DAY
Against the wishes of the studio brass and his star (Jannings) for a more experienced actress, von Sternberg, threatens to leave the production if he cannot work with his discovery (Marlene Dietrich) in the role of the cabaret showgirl Lola Lola who is the love-interest of the professor portrayed by Jannings in the film – who immediately believes Dietrich is upstaging him as the star which starts their conflict.
INT. THE BLUE ANGEL STUDIO SET – DAY
After filming the first rendition of “Falling in Love Again,” Dietrich invites von Sternberg and Jannings, and fellow cast members Kurt Gerron, and Hans Albers ‘out on the town’ of the Weimar “Berlin of Lola Lola”- all Dietrich’s treat. All accept and leave the set and studio, but not before Jannings objecting that such largesse is the prerogative of the star and he will pay – von Sternberg insists, let Dietrich enjoy offering the largesse. This just convinces Jannings that Dietrich is attempting to become the ‘star’ of the film and is undermining him. Dietrich even turns the largesse onto Jannings, saying that she is so honored to be appearing with so eminent an star as Janning, allow me to treat you, she says to him.
INT. SABRI MAHER’S BOXING STUDIO – NIGHT
Dietrich assures von Sternberg she will dutifully lose weight as he requires at the Sabri Mahir Boxing Studio where she has already taken up boxing. Dietrich introduces the group to her trainer, Turkish Boxing Champion Sabri Mahir and has a faux boxing match with fellow actress Carola Neher, and knocks her out with a right cross in order to impress her guests, and then invites everybody to join her at the gay cabaret, Club Silhouette a favorite hangout of show people and the intelligentsia.
INT. CLUB SILHOUETTE – NIGHT
Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld (Berlin’s “Einstein of Sex”) invites Dietrich and company to sit with him. In celebration of her getting the part of Lola Lola, Dietrich buys drinks for everyone in the club, including those who said she can’t act. Carola good-naturedly chides Dietrich, “Just because you got the part, doesn’t mean you can act.” Jannings, not good-naturedly, adds: “It’s her legs that know how to act.” When Nazi Brown Shirts hurl rocks through the club’s windows, Hirschfeld frighteningly predicts an end to freedom with a soon and inevitable Nazi take-over. Among Jannings, Gerron, and Albers, a discussion ensues on survival under Nazi rule. Gerron as a Jew, would have to flee Germany, Albers would send his Jewish mistress to safety in England, Jannings who has a Russian born mother of Jewish ancestry can only see cooperation with the Nazis as his only option to survive and protect himself and loved ones, in other words, hiding in the open. But is there a line that should never be crossed? Gerron says he will consult his Rabbi, Joachim Prinz, and ask if there it is permissible to collaborate with an enemy in order to preserve one’s own life and that of one’s loved ones. who said collaboration with an enemy is permissible as long as lives are saved and no lives are taken by doing so.
INT. APARTMENT OF JOSEF VON STERNBERG – NIGHT
In regard to von Sternberg’s relationship with Dietrich, his wife (Riza Royce) confronts him, “Why don’t you divorce me and marry her?” He answers, “I’d sooner share a phone booth with a cobra.”
INT. SYNAGOGUE STUDY OF RABBI JOACHIM PRINZ – DAY
Kurt Gerron asks the question: Is it permissible to collaborate with an enemy in order to save one’s life and the lives of loved ones. Rabbi Prinz replies, “collaboration with an enemy is permissible as long as lives are saved and no lives are taken by doing so.”
INT. STUDIO SCREENING ROOM – DAY
HEINRICH MANN, upon whose novel (“Professor Unrat”) “The Blue Angel” is based, and Janning have both seen rushes of the recent shoot. Mann says that von Sternberg “has turned my novel into pornography. All that stands out in this film is Miss Dietrich’s legs.” Jannings agrees with Mann.
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY
On a break, Gerron tells Jannings about the meeting and Jannings is relieved about Prinz’s response then he turns to more immediate problems on the set of “The Blue Angel.” Jannings complains to Gerron and Albers that von Sternberg is constantly with Dietrich and neglected his partnership with other actors in creating a great film including the real star of the film, Jannings himself. Gerron and Albers try to reassure Jannings. Von Sternberg appears and Jannings puts his complaints to him directly. Von Sternberg explains that Dietrich needs the extra attention because she is new and unformed. Jannings boldly relates to von Sternberg what Heinrich Mann said about von Sternberg’s turning Mann’s novel into pornography. This doesn’t faze von Sternberg. Jannings then complains that von Sternberg’s attention to Dietrich is inappropriate, it is like Pygmalion with Von Sternberg’s Henry Higgins controlling Dietrich’s Eliza Doolittle, or more sinister, the controlling von Sternberg’s Svengali over Dietrich’s Tribly, or more ironic, von Sternberg’s Professor Rath’s obsession with Dietrich’s Lola Lola that leads to ruin. To this, von Sternberg rebuffs Jannings, calling him a mad man and further states, “Emil, you are the star of “The Blue Angel. Marlene is the novice and needs attention as well as support from you, as the star.”
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY
The conflict between Jannings and Dietrich escalates to violence when Jannings overacts a scene of strangling Dietrich’s character that he actually strangles Dietrich and injures her. Dietrich reacts with enraged humor, “I am angry.” Von Sternberg: “At Jannings?” Dietrich: “Angry at that over-acting ham, yes. But I am angry with myself.” Von Sterberg: “Angry with yourself?” Dietrich: “Yes. I played along at first for the sake of the scene but I could have decked him with my right cross.” Von Sternberg calls on both actors to partner up in the name of the art and finish the film, convincing them that together we are all collaborators in creating a great film. Jannings apologizes. Dietrich accepts.
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY
Von Sternberg’s intervention has worked and Dietrich and Jannings turn in stellar perfomances especially in Dietrich’s signature song, “Falling in love again” and Jannings’ scene of the ruined professor dying.
INT. STUDIO SET OF “THE BLUE ANGEL” – DAY
After the film wraps, Jannings, convinced he has no future in Hollywood because his accent makes him unsuitable for ‘talkies,’ asks studio chief Alfred Hugenberg (a Nazi-supporter) for advice and he answers that he should work in Nazi cinema. Jannings informs Gerron and Albers who say that they have plans on what to do in the event of a Nazi take-over, Gerron (a Jew) will flee to France, Albers will send his Jewish mistress to England. Jannings, will protect his mother, a Russian born woman of Jewish origin if need be by working in Nazi cinema, for the sake of survival.
INT. OFFICE US ARMY HEADQUARTERS – DAY (AS BEFORE)
In answer the question of how he allowed himself to be used by the Nazis, Jannings tells the US Intake Officer, that if he had not worked for the Nazis he may have died and also his Russian Jewish mother. Jannings recalls the fact, that while Gerron was a prisoner in Thereisenstadt, he had made a propaganda film It didn’t save his life, however, he and his family were sent to Auschwitz. The US Officer informs Jannings that he understands Jannings doing propaganda films in order to survive, but he crossed a line: “You received the title ‘artist of the state’ from Goebbels and you campaigned in 1938 for the Nazis in the Reichstag elections. So, you must be de-nazified.” Jannings protests: “If Gerron had survived, would you de-nazify him?” Effectively, Jannings acting career ends and he is ruined in a manner that mirrors the ruination of his Professor Rath character in “The Blue Angel.”
RESOLUTION: Closing Titles:
Emil Jannings never acted again. He died in 1950 of liver cancer. He was given a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
Marlene Dietrich and Josef von Sternberg went to Hollywood and made many acclaimed motion pictures through the 1930’s. Dietrich condemned Hitler and Nazism, She became an American Citizen and entertained the troops even as they marched against the German Army.
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Amy’s Character Outline
What I learned doing this assignment is my scenes will probably be better for doing this. I couldn’t come up with something for every scene, but I improved a lot of them.
INT. – STUDIO – NIGHT
Andrea interviews her husband, Josh, a detective, about the murder that happened in the town. It becomes apparent that they have an issue with one of them, Andrea, being a neglectful parent.
COMPETITIVE: Andrea won’t let Josh end the interview because she knows other stations are waiting to interview him.
TEMPER BUT A SOFTIE WHEN IT COMES TO FAMILY: Josh almost loses his cool but patiently endures Andrea trying to get him to talk about things he’s not allowed to reveal about the case
INT. – UNIVERSITY SCIENCE LAB – DAY
Meagan, a graduate student at the university and a teacher’s assistant for the lab’s top scientist, attends the dedication ceremony for the science lab with the top scientist in charge of building a supercollider.
LYING: Meagan tells the professor she’s a big fan of his work, but when he tries to talk to her about it, she’s clueless.
INT. –NEWSROOM – NIGHT
Breaking news happens. Andrea calls home to let her family know that once again, she will not be home for dinner.
COMPETITIVE: Andrea argues with Josh that this story could be the one that gets her promoted to the network
INT. – KITCHEN – NIGHT
Josh helps the kids with their homework while juggling his own work issues. The kids complain about their mom not being there.
DAD JOKES/KIDS’ CHEERLEADER: Josh tries to get his kids’ attention off the fact that their mother is not there by cracking one of his jokes. He assures them that she loves them.
EXT. – BASEBALL FIELD – NIGHT
At Andrea’s son, Benjamin’s baseball game, Josh is there but distracted by issues at work. Benjamin wonders where his mom is.
INT.– ANDREA’S HOME – NIGHT
Andrea comes home to a dark house and a cold plate of food on the table. She sleeps on the couch.
SELFISH: Andrea reads a note left by her daughter and is touched briefly but quickly puts it down to re-watch the breaking news coverage she delivered that night
INT. – ANDREA’S HOME – DAY
Josh informs Meagan that he hired a nanny. Her name is Meagan, the TA from the university. Josh and Andrea get into a fight.
INT. – NEWSROOM – DAY
Andrea discusses with her boss the exciting new development at the local university, the completion of a supercollider. Her boss assigns her the story.
COMPETITIVE: Andrea’s boss wants to give the story to a reporter, but Andrea wants to take herself even though she is the anchor because it’s such a big story. She convinces her boss to give it to her.
EXT. – POOL – DAY
Andrea’s daughter has a swim meet. It’s her time to swim, but she cries because her mother isn’t there. She has to be coaxed into the pool by her dad.
INT. –UNVERSITY SCIENCE LAB – DAY
Andrea interviews the professor (with Meagan there) who demonstrates for her how the supercollider works. Andrea gets sucked into the machine and disappears.
PLAYFUL: Andrea cracks jokes with the professor while she interviews him.
CONNIVING: Meagan kisses up to Andrea and pretends to like her.
INT. NEWSROOM – DAY
It’s many years in the past. Andrea is just an intern at the station.
COMPETITIVE: Andrea begs a reporter to take her with her to her story. Andrea starts interviewing people when she gets there.
EXT. – STREET – DAY
Andrea is now a reporter at the station. She interviews a cop named Josh.
PLAYFUL: Andrea flirts with Josh
INT. CHURCH – DAY
Andrea is at her wedding.
INT. – HOSPITAL – DAY
Chloe is born.
INT. – ANDREA AND JOSH’S APARTMENT
Chloe celebrates her first birthday.
INT. – HOSPITAL – NIGHT
Benjamin is born.
EXT. – BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Andrea, Josh and Chloe attend Benjamin’s T-ball game.
INT. – NEWSROOM – DAY
Andrea finds out she’s gotten the anchor position at the station.
INT. – UNIVERSITY LAB – DAY
Andrea shows back up but no one is around. She calls the station to tell them something went wrong with the story, but they think it’s a prank and hang up on her.
INT – ANDREA’S HOME – DAY
Andrea drives to her home, but her key doesn’t work, so she rings the bell. Josh comes to the door and nearly faints at the sight of her.
INT. – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
The kids see Andrea are both relieved to see her. She’s confused by their reaction. She tells them about getting sucked into the supercollider and traveling through time.
INT. – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Meagan shows up wearing an engagement ring. Andrea learns that she’s been missing for a year.
COMPETITIVE: Andrea, threatened by Meagan, tries to fire her as the kids’ nanny
COMPETITIVE: Andrea insists that everything that happened over the past year with Meagan, Josh and the kids is null and void since she’s back now.
PLAYFUL: Andrea hurls funny insults at Meagan
MOTHERLY: Meagan gives Andrea a lecture about how she got what she deserved for leaving and she just needs to accept things the way they were
INT. – SCIENCE LAB – DAY
Andrea talks to the professor who is intrigued by her story but unsure how or why the events unfolded as they did. She questions the professor about his relationship with Meagan, but he refuses to talk.
INT. – NEWSROOM –DAY
Andrea realizes that she doesn’t have a job at the station anymore, much less a career. She begs her boss to take her back as a reporter.
NEED FOR VALIDATION: Andrea starts to cry when she realizes her career is gone. She tells her former boss that she’s nothing without her career.
INT. –SCHOOL HALLWAY –DAY
Chloe is practicing for her school play when a prop falls on her. The popular girl who is the lead starts laughing at her inciting everyone else to laugh at her.
EXT. –BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
At Benjamin’s game, the pitcher dislocates his shoulder. Benjamin asks the coach if he can pitch, but he says no.
EXT. – GROCERY STORE – DAY
Andrea’s daughter’s swim team is having a bake sale. Andrea threw something together late last night after work. He daughter is embarrassed by the cookies. Meagan’s cookies are a hit.
SELFISH: Andrea brings her terrible cookies to the bake sale as a half-hearted attempt to be a good mother.
INT. – STREET – DAY
Andrea and Josh attend the town’s food festival and start getting reacquainted. Things are going great until Megan finds them and pulls Josh away on some “emergency.”
CONNIVING: Meagan invents a reason to pull Josh away from Andrea.
COMPETITIVE: Andrea accuses Meagan of lying just to get Josh away from her.
POLITE: Josh plays peacemaker between Andrea and Meagan.
EXT. – STREET – DAY
Andrea calls her daughter and tells her she’s on the way to her school play, but then discovers that she has a flat tire.
INT. – AUDITORIUM – NIGHT
Andrea arrives at the school after the play is over upsetting Chloe. Andrea asks Josh to take her back, but he admits that things weren’t that great when she was around.
INT. – NEWSROOM – DAY
Andrea looks at footage from the rededication of the science lab a year ago and sees Meagan talking to the professor.
INT. –CLASSROOM – DAY
The professor confesses to Andrea that he told Meagan that time travel was possible with the supercollider.
TOUGH-AS-NAILS REPORTER: Andrea badgers the professor until he confesses.
INT. – ANDREA’S HOME – NIGHT
Chloe confides in Andrea about her bully. Andrea gives her advice that’s not really helpful.
SELFISH: Andrea tries to play the part of a good mother by giving her daughter advice, but her heart is not really in it.
EXT. – BASEBALL FIELD – NIGHT
Andrea confronts Meagan in front of everyone about her sending her back in time. Josh doesn’t believe Andrea and gets mad at her.
PLAYFUL: Andrea makes a game out of exposing Meagan and taunts her about her “stolen” family.
A SOFTIE WHEN IT COMES TO FAMILY: Josh takes pity on Meagan when Andrea accuses her and takes up for her.
EXT. –BASEBALL FIELD – LATER
Benjamin gets a chance to pitch but walks every hitter.
INT. – SCIENCE LAB – NIGHT
Andrea tries unsuccessfully to push Meagan into the supercollider and send her to a different time
INT. – NEWSROOM – DAY
Josh admits to falling in love with Andrea again but announces that he’s going ahead with his marriage to Meagan because life is better with her.
POLITE: Josh compliments Andrea on getting her career back and working hard to get her relationships with the kids right before softly letting her down.
INT. – STUDIO – NIGHT
Andrea’s boss threatens to fire her if she leaves to go see her daughter’s dance recital instead of covering the fire at the science lab.
NEED TO FEEL VALIDATED: Andrea reluctantly agrees to go cover the story because the thought of losing her career again is unbearable. She keeps going back and forth between getting in her car to leave and getting in the news van. Finally, the cameraman says he’s leaving with or without her and she hops in the van.
INT. – SCIENCE LAB – NIGHT
Andrea shows up just as the paramedics are wheeling the professor out with cameras rolling. The professor says that he saw Meagan slip out the back just before the fire started.
INT. –AUDITORIUM – BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
Chloe tells Josh and Meagan that she’s giving up on her mother, that she must not love her. The popular girl who made everyone laugh at her during the play overhears this and taunts her.
DAD JOKES: Josh cracks a joke to try and cheer Chloe up.
CONNIVING/MOTHERLY: Meagan hugs Chloe and assures her that she’s there for her even if her mother doesn’t care about her.
INT. –AUDITORIUM – NIGHT
Josh calls Andrea and asks for help with Chloe.
INT. – AUDITORIUM – NIGHT
Andrea shows up with her cameras and the police. They detain Meagan for questioning.
INT. – AUDITORIUM – BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
Josh realizes Andrea was right about Meagan. Andrea goes backstage to talk to Chloe and has choice words for her bully.
INT. – AUDITORIUM – LATER
The performance is done. Chloe runs off the stage to her mom and dad and brother. Andrea’s boss calls and fires her. She says that’s okay because her family is more important. Suddenly…
INT. –SCIENCE LAB – DAY
Andrea is back at the science lab. She runs out of the lab.
INT- ANDREA’S HOME – NIGHT
Andrea runs through the house calling to her family afraid that everything that just happened has been erased, but to her surprise, it hasn’t. The present and future have merged. Andrea’s family is reunited.
EXT. – BASEBALL FIELD – NIGHT
Benjamin gets to pitch and strikes the hitter out. He looks back at his mom, beaming. Andre and Josh kiss.
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Budinscak Character Outline
What I learned doing this assignment is:
o I’m glad I gave my characters a more range by revising their traits.
o I’ve adjusted/revised my characters’ traits as I’ve gone through the modules.
o I focused on the first 15 minutes of the movie.
REVISED OUTLINE:
INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT
KITCHEN
Jack – Showman, slick – in one motion, JACK slices a loaf of Italian bread in half and fills it with a wad of cash. He slips it back in its bag and scribbles “F H” on it. He hides it on the top of a shelf.
TOM, Jack’s brother-in-law, drags nephews PUCK and SAL into the kitchen. Jack sneers at the two preteen cousins. He gives them orders to carry food and cuffs Sal in the back of the head.
INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT
DINING ROOM
Jack – Conniving – Jack carries the conversation with his extended family present and occasionally makes fun of his two nephews. When Puck makes an insightful comment questioning his uncle, Jack cuffs Puck on the back of his head – harder than he hit Sal.
EXT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT
Jack – Street smart – Jack watches the activity at the funeral home across the parking lot. MEN struggle with a body bag – it jerks wildly – pulling it from the hearse. Jack counts the men, the number of seconds to get the back from the hearse into the funeral home – and nods to himself that he could escape. Jack spins around to go back inside and steps on a cat’s tail. The cat screams and the men from the funeral home look over.
INT. CARMINE’S – NIGHT
DINING ROOM
Jack – Condescending, Big Heart – Jack makes fun of his nephews, it’s good-natured ribbing and the boys love it.
Puck – Nerdy, Devious – Puck questions his uncle and Jack doesn’t like being showed up. He smacks the back of Puck’s head.
Sal – street smart, sneaky – when Jack asks for silence, Sal makes a sound and blames Puck. Puck suffers the punishment and Sal skates from blame.
EXT. PARKING LOT – NIGHT
Jack – street smart, big heart – Jack crosses the parking lot with the loaf of bread (figurative and literally) and some leftovers from his family’s dinner. He feigns ignorance when he’s questioned by Don Vito’s men on what he saw.
INT. FUNERAL HOME – NIGHT
Don Vito – Narcissist, sneaky – Don Vito questions Jack about what he saw, but Jack claims ignorance. The Don says that to make things whole, Jack must do him a favor. He must deliver a package for Don Vito, and in return, the Don promises NOT to burn Jack’s family’s restaurant, to the ground
Jack – Street smart – Jack knows as soon as he claims he saw something, it’s over. He continues to say, and rather convincingly, that he never saw a thing. And after hearing Don Vito’s offer, Jack agrees to make the delivery.
INT. CARMINE’S – DAY
Jack – Showman – Jack brags to his family that Don Vito needs his help and asked Jack for a favor. He outlines a grandiose plan for the upcoming weekend – Jack’s going to Atlantic City. He never tells anyone what would have happened if he said ‘no’.
Sal – sneaky – Sal hears Atlantic City and seizes the opportunity. He convinces Puck to go along with his plan and the result – Puck and Sal will be swimming in the ocean off Atlantic City.
Puck – Book smart, gullible – Puck believes his cousin and follows him blindly into the adventure.
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[PS80] Day 8: Fill Your Outline with Character
Armand Character Outline
OPENING
Tyler, a privileged and arrogant college kids, has invited his friends for a weekend at his family manor. Tyler is avoiding confronting his recent expulsion.
Charles, Tyler’s half-brother and confidant, advises Tyler to tell the truth to their hard-to-please father.
When a masked serial killer murders all of Tyler’s friends, Tyler has the initial instinct to protect his girlfriend Maddie. Ultimately, getting scared and killed.
THE INCITING INCIDENT
The serial killer chases after Maddie, we don’t know what happens next.
\With his cowardice and Maddie as the last two things on his mind before his death, Tyler is “cursed” and becomes a ghost, secretly regretting his choices.
BY PAGE 10, WE KNOW WHAT THE MOVIE IS ABOUT
As the years go by, Tyler has “nightmares” of the masked killer roaming areas of the manor, and he tries to avoid the killer at all cost.
The killer, who is secretly Charles under the mask, treasures the memories of his murder spree and keeps coming back to the manor throughout the years (unaware Tyler’s ghost is there).
New college kids arrive to party for the weekend after the manor is finally sold 20 years after the massacre.
FIRST TURNING POINT AT THE END OF ACT ONE
Tyler realizes the serial killer is back. Empowered by the fact that he’s a ghost and can’t be harmed again, Tyler tries and fails (miserably) to save one of the college kids from a gruesome murder.
The killer realizes something supernatural is occurring due to Tyler’s intervention.
Tyler tries to warn the college kids to leave. He finds a way to communicate with Lex, the teen sister of one of the college kids.
MIDPOINT
Maddie, now a badass vigilante, shows up and fights off the killer before he murders the main college kids.
The killer, who has been in love with Maddie all these years, lets her live while he digests the shock of seeing Maddie alive.
Tyler is genuinely happy and relieved to find out Maddie is alive. He tries reconnecting with her, but refuses to apologize for his actions 20 years earlier.
SECOND TURNING POINT AT END OF ACT 2
The serial killer murders Lex while she tried to protect her sister. Tyler goes into hiding, unable to confront this loss.
CRISIS
The killer kidnaps Dallas, Lex’s sister.
Tyler admits his fears to Maddie. He apologizes to her.
CLIMAX
Tyler and Maddie unmask Charles as the serial killer. Charles admits his motivation deep down is the pleasure he feels when he kills.
Tyler confronts Charles, and defeats him.
RESOLUTION
Lex is alive, grows closer with her sister Dallas.
Maddie, badly injured by Charles, dies.
Tyler’s soul is freed and he moves on to the after-life with Maddie’s soul.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by Armand Petrikowski.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by
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Rob Bertrand’s Character Outline
What I learned: I learned out to use my character profiles to insert character into my outline.
Updated 11/6/21
FADE IN:
EXT. WEDDING VENUE – DUSK
ALCOHOLIC – Jack can’t drive because he and Nora have had too much to drink. Even though, Jack promised to be the designated driver.
WANTS TO BE LIKED – Annie volunteers to drive. She has her learner’s permit.
INT. ANDREWS CAR – NIGHT
QUICK TEMPERED – Annie argues with Jack after he makes an intolerant comment about gay marriage. Distracted, Annie runs a stop sign and the family is broadsided by another vehicle. Nora dies at the scene.
INT. LIVING ROOM – DAY
QUICK TEMPERED – At the funeral reception, Annie overhears Jack tell someone that if he hadn’t let her drive, that Nora would still be alive. We are introduced to the friendly elderly neighbors.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – DAY
WANTS TO BE LIKED- A year later, Annie is getting her makeup done by her best friend, Jocelyn. We learn that Annie has a date with a boy she met online, but she doesn’t really want to go. Annie has a crush on someone else. Jocelyn admits to breaking up with her boyfriend.
INT. FATHER’S ROOM – DAY
NERVOUS – Jessica enters to wake her father for work and discovers he fell asleep clutching Nora’s wedding dress. Empty liquor bottles litter the floor.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – DAY
SOFT SPOT – Jack pokes his head in to say goodbye before leaving for work and remembers that Annie has that “thing.” He think’s getting out of the house and socializing is a good thing.
QUICK TEMPERED – Annie asks when she can get her driver’s license. Jack doesn’t think she’s ready. The conversation ends with an argument. Jack is saved by the doorbell.
INT. LIVING ROOM – DAY
FRAGILE – Annie answers the door and is thrown off. Danny looks nothing like how he described himself. Instead of blonde and athletic, he has greasy black hair and is super skinny. He’s sloppily dressed in dirty clothes.
REBELLIOUS – Jocelyn and Jessica decide to follow Annie from a distance.
EXT. COUNTY FAIR – NIGHT
DELUSIONAL – The date with Danny is awkward and uncomfortable. Danny wants to know everything about Annie’s dead mother. Danny thinks a mother is the heart of a family.
EXT. FERRIS WHEEL – COUNTY FAIR – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Danny and Annie ride the Ferris wheel. Annie admits that she sometimes thinks the wrong parent died.
OBSESSED – Danny tries to kiss Annie. Repulsed, Annie rejects Danny, who doesn’t take it well. Annie texts Jocelyn that she needs to bail. Jocelyn texts back where to meet.
EXT. BATHROOMS – COUNTY FAIR – NIGHT
FRAGILE: Annie tells Danny that she’ll be right back. She enters the restroom, then exits the opposite side, where she meets Jocelyn and Jessica. They disappear into the crowd.
EXT. RESTROOMS – COUNTY FAIR – NIGHT
OBSESSED – Danny grows impatient for Annie. He asks a stranger if she saw Annie inside and they shake their head. Danny shouts into the lady’s restroom for Annie. No response.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Jessica wants to watch a scary movie and begs until Annie says yes. The phone rings off the hook, but Annie doesn’t answer. She knows it’s Danny.
INT. KITCHEN – MORNING
FRAGILE – Jack stumbles in from work, as Jessica and Annie eat cereal. Annie tells him about Danny. Jessica thinks the house is haunted and that there’s a monster in her closet. Frank tells them to clean their dishes before they leave for school and no more scary movies.
INT. LIVING ROOM – DAY
PROTECTIVE – Jack answers the front door and finds Danny, wearing the same clothes as yesterday, on the porch. Jack tells
OBSESSED – Danny to stay away from his daughter. Danny tells Jack that Annie was right, it should have been him that died.
EXT. ANDREWS HOUSE – DAY
SARCASTIC – Annie and Jessica arrive home from school. Jack left a note, he picked up a shift and won’t be home till late. Money for a pizza on the fridge.
INT. KITCHEN – DAY
SARCASTIC – Annie finds a bowl of half-eaten cereal on the counter and gets on Jessica’s case for not cleaning up after herself. Annie doesn’t want to be Jessica’s mom. Jessica swears she put the bowl away. There’s no money on the fridge.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – As Jessica and Annie eat ramen, they hear the sound of heavy furniture moving in the basement. Annie sets down the TV remote and the girls cautiously head downstairs.
INT. BASEMENT – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie peeks into the room and flips on the light. Nothing is there. From upstairs, the TV volume goes full blast. The girl’s scream.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
QUICK TEMPERED – Annie and Jessica search frantically for the remote, but it’s missing. Annie finds the volume button on the TV and turns it down. The remote-control flies out of the kitchen and explodes against the wall. Annie smells her mother’s perfume.
INT. JESSICA’S ROOM – NIGHT
MOTHERLY – Annie tucks Jessica into bed.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – NIGHT
SARCASTIC – Annie enters her room and finds her window open. She doesn’t remember opening it. Jessica screams from her bedroom.
INT. JESSICA’S ROOM – NIGHT
MOTHERLY – Annie rushes in. Jessica tells her there’s a monster in the closet. Annie blames it on the scary movie. She checks the closet, but nothings in there. Annie explains that monsters aren’t real.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie begins to change into her pajamas, but gets the feeling she’s being watched.
INT. LIVING ROOM – MORNING
ALCOHOLIC / FOUL MOUTHEDD – Jack gets home from work and is pounced on by his daughters. They talk over each other, explaining the creepy phenomenon. Jack thinks they’re pulling pranks. Jack doesn’t want them watching scary movies anymore.
EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD – DAY
WANTS TO BE LIKED – Annie, Jessica and Jocelyn walk home from school. Jessica tells Jocelyn about the creepy things happening around their house. Jocelyn asks if it could be their mom and freaks Jessica out. Jocelyn wants to do a séance.
INT. BASEMENT – ANDREW’S HOUSE – NIGHT
WANTS TO BE LIKED / FRAGILE – Annie, Jessica, Jocelyn and their flamboyant friend Robert, perform a séance. When asked if the spirit blames Annie for the death of Nora the spirit replies yes.
ALCOHOLIC – They are interrupted by Jack, who’s a bit drunk. He’s furious at them for playing around with devil worship.
QUICK TEMPERED – Annie and Jack have an emotional fight. Jack accuses her friends of drinking all his beer. Annie embarrasses Jack for sleeping with her mom’s wedding dress.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGIEL / WANTS TO BE LIKED – Jocelyn consoles Annie, who’s upset that her mom blames her for her death. Annie thinks her father hates her.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOUSE – NIGHT
FOUL MOUTHED – Jack throws Nora’s wedding dress in a trash can and closes the lid.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – MORNING
SARCASTIC – Annie watches Jocelyn sleep. Jocelyn wakes and they share their first kiss. They are interrupted by pounding on the wall. Jocelyn leaves and there’s a loud crash from the hallway.
INT. LIVING ROOM – MORNING
FRAGILE – Annie finds Jocelyn in a heap at the bottom of the stairs. Her arms are broken.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOUSE – MORNING
QUICK TEMPERED – Paramedics load Jocelyn into the back of an ambulance, as she mutters about being pushed from behind. Annie has an argument with her father.
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
PROTECTIVE – Jocelyn’s parents argue with Jack in the hallway.
FRAGILE – Annie questions Jocelyn about what happened. Jocelyn only remembers a lady in white and the feeling of being pushed.
INT. JACK’S TRUCK – DAY
FRAGILE / WANTS TO BE LIKED – It’s a tense ride home. Annie texts Jocelyn, but it goes unread.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – EVENING
FRAGILE – Jack pokes his head in to say goodbye. Annie doesn’t speak to him. She watches out the window as Jack backs out of the driveway. Annie hears whispers in her room.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
SARCASTIC / QUICK TEMPERED – Annie and Jessica watch a mindless reality show, while armed with a baseball bat and kitchen knife. Suddenly, noises from the basement.
INT. BASEMENT – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie and Jessica, investigate the basement and discover a message written in blood. “It’s your fault!” The freezer pushes towards them.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOME – NIGHT
FRAGILE – The sisters flee the house and head to the elderly neighbors we met at the funeral reception.
INT. BASEMENT – NIGHT
FOUL MOUTHED – Police search the house, but there’s no sign of anyone. A cop tells Jack that the message was written in ketchup and that the girls must be acting out for attention. Jack is furious.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
QUICK TEMPERED / FOUL MOUTHED – Jack and Annie have a brutal argument. Jack tells his daughters, “Don’t cry wolf.” Jack understands that Annie’s pain because he lost her too. Jack says he has to live everyday with…Annie cuts him off, “With the girl that killed her?” The argument ends with Annie wishing her father was dead.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – VARIOUS
Montage – Annie secludes herself in her room as the season changes from Fall to Winter.
EXT. HIGH SCHOOL – DAY
WANTS TO BE LIKED / FRAGILE – Annie sits with Robert, eating lunch. She waves at Jocelyn, but it’s not reciprocated. Robert asks about the house and Annie reveals that it’s been quiet lately.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – NIGHT
WANTS TO BE LIKED / FRAGILE – Annie video chats with Jocelyn. Jocelyn explains that she can’t see Annie anymore because she’s getting back together with her boyfriend. Annie gets teary eyed.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
NERVOUS – Jessica watches TV on the couch. She’s startled by a red ball that rolls out of a closet.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM
FRAGILE / QUICK TEMPERED – Jessica bursts in, scaring Annie and Jocelyn half to death. Jocelyn sees the lady in white behind Annie and Jessica. Annie ends the video chat before Jocelyn can warn her. Jessica consoles Annie, when a loud voice screams Annie’s name from downstairs.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie and Jessica ease their way down the stairs, searching for the signs of trouble. They search the living, but nothing is there. Suddenly, a crash from Annie’s room.
INT. ANNIE’S ROOM – NIGHT
SARCASTIC / FRAGILE – The room looks like a tornado hit it. The bed and furniture have been toppled. Clothes and knickknacks have been thrown everywhere. On the wall is written: “You don’t belong!” One by one, pictures frames hung on the wall fly off the shelf, nail and all.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie and Jessica run down the stairs, as pictures fly off the living room wall. A cross slowly spins upside down. Annie pulls Jessica out the door.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOUSE – NIGHT
The sister’s run to the safety of the neighbors.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOUSE – LATER
FOUL MOUTHED – Jack’s truck skids to a stop in front of the house. The elderly Neighbor greets him in the drive way. The neighbor says he looked around, but everything seemed normal. He didn’t call the cops.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
FOUL MOUTHED / PROTECTIVE – Jack enters the house, only to discover the house is completely wrecked. Every light has been shattered. He’s drawn to the sound of static coming from upstairs.
INT. JACK’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
PROTECTIVE – Jack opens the door slowly to reveal a message on the wall that reads: “Marry me!” There’s a quick flash of what appears to be Nora in her wedding dress. Jack is knocked out from behind.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOUSE – NIGHT
QUICK TEMPERED – Annie grows impatient. She heads inside her house to find her father.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie enters slowly, sizing up the mess. There’s no sign of her father. From upstairs, the sound of wedding music.
INT. JACK’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
HIDDEN STRENGTH/ QUICK TEMPERED – Annie opens the door and finds her father, tied to a chair with a head wound. The ghost haunting the house is revealed to be Danny, who’s wearing Nora’s dirty wedding dress. He’s completely insane and has taken on Nora’s persona.
DELUSIONAL – Danny gives Annie the choice: The wrong parent died? Kill your father and you can have your mom back. You wanted him dead.
Danny chops off Jack’s left wedding ring hand. Annie convinces Danny to give her the axe so she can kill her father. It’s a trick and she drives the axe into Danny’s shoulder.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOUSE – NIGHT
HIDDEN STRENGTH- Annie drags her dad to safety as Danny watches from the upstairs bedroom window. Jack is losing a lot of blood. Annie has no choice but to drive her dad to the hospital.
INT. JACK’S TRUCK – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie is scared to drive, but Jack believes in her.
INT. JACK’S TRUCK – MOMENTS LATER
HIDDEN STRENGTH – Annie weaves through traffic as her father fights to keep his eyes open.
EXT. EMERGENCY ROOM – HOSPITAL – NIGHT
HIDDEN STRENGTH – Annie screeches to a halt and jumps out. She runs inside.
INT. EMERGENCY ROOM – HOSPITAL – NIGHT
QUICK TEMPERED – Annie, covered in blood, screams for help.
EXT. EMERGENCY ROOM – HOSPITAL – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Hospital staff swarm the truck and put Jack on a stretcher. Annie watches in horror.
INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Police use a dog to search the house. The dog catches a scent and barks at the basement door.
INT. BASEMENT – NIGHT
DELUSIONAL / DANGEROUS – The search dog barks at the freezer in the corner. Police move the freezer and discover a large hole in the wall. A cop shines a flashlight into the hole and illuminates the face of Danny.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOME – NIGHT
LIAR – Danny is handcuffed to a gurney and placed in the back of an ambulance.
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – NIGHT
FRAGILE – Annie learns that her father is going to live. Annie breaks down with tears of joy, until she over hears that Danny is at the same hospital.
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
PROTECTIVE / HIDDEN STRENGTH – Jack rests in a hospital bed, with Annie and Jessica by his side. A police detective explains Danny’s history of violence and the charges he’ll face.
INT. WALLS – ANDREW’S HOME – VARIOUS
MONTAGE:
Danny slips through Annie’s open window.
Danny discovers the basement crawl space.
Danny takes the pizza money.
Danny watches Annie through a peephole he made.
Danny crawling through the walls to different peepholes.
Danny banging on the walls.
Danny slamming nails with a brick to make picture frames fall.
We see food wrappers and beer bottles filled with urine.
A pile of tissues and a stolen bottle of lotion.
INT. JACK’S HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
HIDDEN STRENGTH / PROTECTIVE – Annie is disgusted. Jack takes her hand and tells her that they will get through this together. The police detective leaves. Annie opens up to Jack and finally comes out to him. Jack is loving and supportive.
INT. HALLWAY – HOSPITAL – NIGHT
HIDDEN STRENGTH – Annie waits for the Guard to step away from his post at Danny’s door and sneaks in.
INT. DANNY’S HOSPITAL ROOM – NIGHT
SARCASTIC / HIDDEN STRENGTH – Annie confronts Danny, who’s handcuffed to the bed. We think she’s going to hurt him.
TRAUMATIZED – Danny reveals his backstory
HIDDEN STRENGTH – She tells Danny that she told her sister that monsters aren’t real. But she was wrong. She calls him a monster and tells him that he needs to get help. She ends the conversation by forgiving him.
EXT. LOCAL CEMETERY – DAY
FRAGILE – Annie sets a bouquet of flowers down on Nora’s grave. She’s joined by her father and sister. They embrace, with tears in their eyes.
INT. DANNY’S HOSPITAL ROOM – NIGHT
A Nurse enters to check on Danny, but he escaped. She alerts the guard.
EXT. ANDREW’S HOME – DAY
PROTECTIVE – A few weeks later, the Andrews watch as movers load a moving truck. Jack receives a call about Danny.
HIDDEN STRENGTH – Annie isn’t worried. The family gives the house one last look before saying goodbye. When it’s time to go, Jack tosses Annie the keys to her first car.
INT. SUBURBAN HOME – DAY
DELUSIONAL – A mom enters the house, followed by her two young children. She finds the back door open and a dirty cereal bowl on the kitchen counter. A knife is missing from the butcher block.
FADE OUT
-
This is the most overwhelming assignment yet that would take me a year to do properly. Instead of stressing, I will upload a messy draft I have now so I don’t get too far behind. My plan is to keep working on this assignment every day while trying to put more descriptive scenes in the novel and do the other daily assignments. So far it is not working. Part of the problem is the inability to write the screenplay in proper screenwriting software and then the fact that my third novel is still not working, despite all my plotting etc. Just a few scenes are filled in but I understand the need to make the characters playable like Shakespeare’s actors.
The entire outline showing ALL of your scenes in the movie.
1)EXT. SUMMIT – GARDEN ROOF- SUNRISE
IBRAHIM AL HARBI and his ten year old son OMAR arrive to pray as the sun rises behind the crowded skyline of Long Island City.IBRAHIM
The Summit brings us closer to God.
His daughter CORAL works on the roof garden with KISELE FELDMAN, also ten years old.
KISElE
Nature is our God.Ibrahim clenches his fist with this blasphemy but prepares the prayer mats.
SANDRINE, his wife, and DELPHINE, the other triplet, are doing band exercises with JAKE LA ROCHE, a 40 year old trainer.
IBRAHIM
Turn off the music. Prayer time.
Jake switches his phone to loud, resonant call to prayers in Arabic as the women twist and stretch more vigorously.
IBRAHIM
No, bro. Off, now.Jake is a people pleaser, so he salutes and mumbles “rain check,” to the ladies.
JAKE
You’re the boss. They know what to do, or not. Damn Best Butt Ever, they got the wings of angels! I gotta client uptown. Later.Jake flies off the roof like a hornet on speed.
The ladies finish their exercises gracefully as Ibrahim and Omar go through their rituals on the wings of angels because the other four members join them. Ibrahim blows kisses to everyone, avoiding contact, puts on an N95 mask, takes the elevator, gets his car out of the garage, and drives on the FDR.
3) EXT. IBRAHIM’s CAR – DAY
Ibrahim picks up Boat Bob, quickly transformed from a homeless man camping out by the East River Esplanade to a clean, sixty-year-old hiker with a big backpack.4) EXT. GW BRIDGE – DAY
Looking at the signs and the net.IBRAHIM
You are not alone. Call 911. This is the choice place for New Yorkers to commit suicide.BB
We can help.IBRAHIM
But this magnificent bridge is more dramatic. And it’s like winning the lottery—a tiny chance you will be saved by global attention.
BB
I like death too much to end it forever. I need to keep enjoying it as long as I can.They notice Jake running with his client.
IBRAHIM
Now there’s a man who uses every second. He was training my family at dawn on the roof.Jake pockets a small sharp basalt rock from the Palisades cliffs.
BB
Don’t tell me Jake also throws stones.
IBRAHIM
I hate to be rude and crude but shut the fuck up. Fermes ta gueule. Fermez la bouche. Put on your mask. It’s a pandemic!5) EXT. PALISADES – DAY
Ibrahim and BB pick up LITONYA LENAPE, a geologist at the Earth Observatory.LITONYA
I love nature. I would kill my fracking father again. I am not reformed after seven years in jail.BB
Jail sucks. I spent seven months in jail and that was enough.3) EXT. SOLAR HOUSE – DAY
They drop Litonya off at her solar house on Huguenot Street so she can prepare her dissertation defense for her PhD in geology.4) EXT. COLONIAL – DAY
Ibrahim leaves BB at the Colonial garage, a huge house with antique cars where BB helps Kisele and the kids design eco boats.5) INT. TUDOR MANSION – EVENING
Ibrahim finishes his day alone in the Green Room of his home on Huguenot St. with Muslim prayers. Out his window he sees Jake covered in turquoise paint. BB watches everything from the woods.6) EXT.TURQUOISE CHURCH – DAY
Jake is painting a pink church turquoise to turn it into a virtual fitness studio. FADMA and MINA pass by, Ibrahim’s former wife and daughter. We learn that four of Ibrahim’s kids have Jake’s sperm.7) INT. LA ROCHE STONE HOUSE – DAY
Jake makes and serves lunch to JEAN LA ROCHE, his dad and a history professor locked in with ALS. His mom, DR. JOAN LA ROCHE stops by on her way to work.8)INT. NEW PALTZ MEDICAL CENTER – DAY
Dr. Joan tests positive for COVID. BB sprays sanitizer everywhere.9)INT. LA ROCHE STONE HOUSE – DAY
BB is obsessively cleaning the mansion in preparation for her quarantine. Jake morphs into a caretaker for parents.10)INT. CPR OFFICE -DAY
Jake practices CPR on dummies. JOE, BB’s adopted son, helps. Then he puts on his firefighter uniform. BB enters and he and Joe talk about boxing their first loves. FLASHBACK to the funeral of Joe’s first boxing coach in the New Paltz cemetery who died of Alzheimer’s.11)EXT. LAWN OUTSIDE COLONIAL MANSION – EVENING
During the Feldman’s super spreader academic event, BB sprays his sanitizer, secretly laced with COVID.12)INT. FELDMAN’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
As they have sex on their waterbed, JEN and ELIOT FELDMAN code. Jake and Rodney rush in to perform CPR. Then Joe arrives with two stretchers. BB helps out as usual.13) INT. HOSPITAL—NIGHT
The Feldmans are DOA. Rodney is detained for testing positive for COVID, low oxygen saturation and fever, but Jake and Joe go home. Rodney dies that night of a cytokine fire.14) EXT. NEW PALTZ CEMETERY – DAY
A service is held for Jen, Eliot, and Rodney. Litonya, Jake, and Kisele stay longer at Rodney’s grave and leave together. BB is immaculately dressed as part of the morticians’ team. Inciting Incident.15) INT. COLONIAL MANSION
A series of shots inside shows BB cleaning and doing construction for the Feldman relatives, filthy homeless rejects from Manhattan. This montage ends with LANA coding from COVID on the toilet from BB’s squirter but also because she was anti-vax. Jake and Joe enter but it is too late for CPR because rigor mortis has set in.16) INT. BOXING STUDIO – DAY
Joe tries to get his long haul COVID wife CS, Cheering Spear, back into ring shape but it isn’t working. BB and Jake offer suggestions since they are all recovered.12) EXT. SUMMIT ROOF – EVENING
Jake is training clients, including Ibrahim. As NIGHT approaches, Jake leaves and BB slips in for a secret discussion and an exchange of goods and services.13)EXT. OUTDOOR RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Ibrahim is having dinner with his wife and triplets. When they leave, BB drops a match on the wood bungalow that instantly blows up, burning SENIORS in a nearby tenement in NYC’s UES. Then he sprays the sanitizer on others in the Plexiglas cubicles.19) EXT. SUMMIT HIGH RISE – DAY
BB and others watch as Hurricane Ida pummels the East River and the Summit pancakes down.
A SERIES OF SHOTS
The pile transforms for search and rescue. Remains of OMAR and SANDRINE, Ibrahim’s wife and daughter are found.20) EXT. NEW PALTZ CEMETERY – DAY
A Muslim service for Omar and Sandrine. Ibrahim can’t trust God anymore. Fate versus human will. BB helped prepare the corpses because they were too burnt for Ibrahim to look.A few days later, eyes look upward.
STOCK FOOTAGE of Blue Origin Space Trip.
CLOSE on Ibrahim smiling with a thumbs up.
EXT. FELDMANS’ GARAGE
Litonya and Ibrahim stand 12 feet apart amidst ecoboats in construction.
LITONYA Traitor. Do you know how much gas it takes to blast off into outer space?
IBRAHIM It gave me more appreciation for the earth.
LITONYA Bullshit.
IBRAHIM You were never more than a consultant for the EvergreenEnergy Company. Rodney is gone and I am too tired and busy to–
LITONYA What about Kisele?
IBRAHIM At eleven years old, he can’t run the company but I will hire environmental engineers to help with his ecoboats or whatever dream.
LITONYA What are you going to do? Cheat on Bezos with another space venture?
IBRAHIM I am focusing on science and engineering in a bigger way to save the earth.
LITONYA Bullshit. I don’t trust you.
IBRAHIM We have the same mission but different ways of going about it. I promise to help your kids. At least you have kids of your own.
LITONYA I am sorry about your loss. The Summit collapse was so unexpected.
IBRAHIM Nature is the worst terrorist. We must fight her. We can’t be pawns in her bipolar madness.
LITONYA Look, I don’t argue. I don’t care enough about people to fight with them.
21) INT. TUDOR TOWER – EVENING
Ibrahim warms himself by his historic Tudor fireplace. He dyed his hair black last night to hide his senior salt. Time to put more pepper in his life. He wears enormous orange slippers in honor of Halloween evening. As he opens the door, Aaanadi is the first one in, waddling in an orange jumpsuit with a puffy pumpkin hat topped by a green stalk and a golden halo. She flaps golden wings and smiles joyfully.
AANADI
I’m one and a half and I can light up and fly!
CS is dressed as a witch, looking like a kid because she is 4’9” and around 90 pounds ever since she got long haul COVID. She hides her portable oxygen under her Halloween mask. She wears a skeleton pant suit that used to be tight. Their costumes make Ibrahim smile.
IBRAHIM
CS, you look as young and happy as your trick or treating toddler.
CS puts down a knapsack and adjusts the oxygen in her nose to breathe better.
CS
I am not playing like a kid, but I like this disguise. Just don’t give me or Aanadi candy.”
IBRAHIM
Joe?
CS
He must cover today, tomorrow, and all week because thirty percent of the firefighters will be put on unpaid leave since they won’t get the vax. Joe is double vaxxed and recovered so even though he theoretically left in summer 2020, he is always ready to get paid overtime.
IBRAHIM
Heroes. Front line workers. He worked so hard on the Summit condo collapse. I’m sorry for your loss. People never get over stuff like that. I would die if I lost Joe.
CS
I still have a lot to live for but you are right, the loss was devastating. Hurricane Ida killed Sandrine, Omar, and my faith. I want to divest completely from the EvergreenEnergy Company.
CS
Big mistake. The future is in renewables. You set that company up with Rodney. It is Kisele’s and we are talking about his trust fund.
IBRAHIM
I thought your belligerence was limited to boxing. Litonya and I discussed it. She was never more than a consultant for EE. Her heart is made of stone and her body is glued to her rocks. I will get mentors in environmental engineering to help Kisele with his ecoboats but my portfolio goes completely to STEMGARCHS.”
CS fidgets with the black lace over her witch eyes. “They are a new and controversial company. They may have helped start the pandemic.”
Ibrahim breaks out of his formal prose, “Shit! Don’t tell me you are persuaded by Internet misinformation.”
“Most people agree that COVID was a bioweapon and companies like STEMGARCHS are at fault. I want nothing to do with anyone or anything that would spread this horrific virus that has ruined my life and others.”
As she finishes her sentence, Ibrahim opens the door. Her husband Joe bursts in, dressed as a real firefighter, accompanied by his adopted father, BB, who ironically has spread the virus with his special sanitizer, but that is a secret he and Ibrahim will never confess. Joe picks up his cute little orange pumpkin and covers her round face with kisses. BB winks at Ibrahim, a little out of character.
Ibrahim takes control, “Happy Halloween everyone. BB help me organize some treats.” As CS and Joe pay attention to their little darling, Ibrahim and BB prepare pumpkin pie with whipped cream and hot apple cider. Everyone sits by the fire indulging in these treats.
Joe looks at his watch, “I gotta go back to the firehouse tonight. On call for the next week. The city is short of ambulance drivers, EMS technicians, police, sanitation workers—you name it.”
Ibrahim shakes his head, “We are lucky to have these vaccines. Long live Big Pharma.”
Joe objects, “I agree, sort of, but many of my colleagues think there are long term bad effects of getting vaccinated every six months. Not sure how I will feel after my fourth booster.”
BB watches, listens, and cleans up, a man of few words. “If you have to work for the next week or so, I will drive CS and Aanadi back to New Paltz tonight. We should leave soon.”
Ibrahim brings out books and toys. Aanadi is magnetic enough to focus attention on her needs and wants, hiding the nefarious underbelly of what is really going on. Joe gulps down a second piece of pie, kisses his family goodbye and leaves to serve the city. BB packs CS and Aanadi into the back of the car and is as quiet as a chauffeur, driving quickly and carefully for the next 90 minutes, until he delivers them to their solar house and parks himself in the huge garage where he makes his nest inside a boat they are working on. He hasn’t slept in a real bed for years. Even in his dreams, he never feels guilty.
22) INT. BOAT – DAY
Jesse is born. CS and Joe are godparents.23) INT.TUDOR MANSION – DAY
Delphine coaches her dad to talk more American with yeah, ya know, ha ha ha in an amiable monotone.
Ibrahim meets BB in his office. Papers are exchanged.
A SERIES OF SHOTS
as his home is transformed into a modern art gallery with the return of Fadma, his former wife, and their daughter Mina, also an artist. Ibrahim argues CS his financial advisor still recovering from long haul COVID. BB enters and they have an argument about CS. Ibrahim says CS knows too much.22) EXT. GARAGE – DAY
BB toys with the last antique car, fixing the brakes.FLASHBACK
EXT. CAR – DAWN
Leo putters with a car fixing brakes.23) A SERIES OF SHOTS Beginning of Plot Point One
His wife NATALIA crashes the car on a snowy road. It blows up killing her.
Leo lovingly prepares her body for burial.
Leo lustfully satisfies himself after hours.
People come and cry, especially his handsome adopted son JOE.
Leo and his son JOE go to the funeral of Floyd Patterson at the same New Paltz cemetery.
Leo watches him box in his boxing conditioning studio as beautiful girls watch.24) EXT. SOLAR HOUSE – DAY
The antique car blows up in the driveway instantly killing Norm and Keith. CS, Joe’s wife, runs out and passes out from flames. SIRENS scream and Joe arrives to pick up CS, but the geothermal basement explodes, killing him and demolishing the house.25) EXT. CHURCH CEMETERY – NIGHT
Ibrahim and BB are screaming at each other. Then BB is left alone crying at Joe’s grave.
BB
A hero. No one can replace him. What the fuck was he doing here?
IBRAHIM
His duty. Fight fire. Your timing was off. You are good but your timing is flawed.DREAM to NIGHTMARE of his Bobby/Leo/BB’s past as a serial killer rapist. BABY IN WOMB rocking blissfully. Forceps violently pull him out of the womb into the tomb.
INT. FUNERAL PARLOR- DAY
Bobby’s right eye is made of glass as he beautifies the corpse. His right hand slips under the table as his shoulder vibrates him to an ecstatic explosion.EXT. CLIMBING PITCH – DAY
Bobby has transformed into smiling LEO, the hospitality guy, selling food and drink to BEAUTIFUL BUFF CLIMBERS, especially Litonya Lenape, the top climber and a geology prof at the college. SCREAMS as gorgeous climbers collapse on the ground. Leo/Bobby mounts them, then hides the evidence.26) INT. TUDOR TOWER – NIGHT
Ibrahim and BB are consulting in his new office overlooking Fort Washington Park where they keep vials for neurodegenerative diseases. BB talks about sex reassignment. Ibrahim must be convinced.27) INT. HOSPITAL – DAY
A SERIES OF SHOTS in various hospital rooms as BB slowly emerges as Betty, a sixty-something woman. Plot Point One28) INT. COLONIAL MANSION – DAY
Betty cooks as well as cleans for Jake, Litonya, Kisele, and their little ones, Aanadi, his granddaughter, and Jesse, their newborn.29) INT. LA ROCHE STONE MANSION – DAY
But Jake is no longer laughing because his dad is locked in with ALS and his mom is locked out with Alzheimer’s and he is desperate for something to help them. It takes both Jake and BB to bring his mom back from the woods.30) EXT. WOODS – NIGHT
Betty goes for a moonlit canoe ride and is raped by the banks of the Wallkill. FLASHBACK to Leo’s rapes and murders where cadavers disintegrated into nature. Ironically, she feels more empowered, but her perpetrators run away scared because of her unexpected reaction.31)EXT. NEW PALTZ MAIN STREET – DAY
Betty struts through the street a bit like Priceless did years ago after he as Leo tried to rape her. FLASHBACK to Priceless dancing in Muddy Mansion and the younger Leo tying her up near the French church.32} INT. LA ROCHE STONE HOUSE – DAY
Betty and Jake care for Jean and Joan La Roche, seriously disabled by ALS and Alzheimer’s.33) EXT. IBRAHIM’S BOAT – DAY
Betty sails down the Hudson venturing into a secret lab with masked scientists looking as anonymous as the men who raped her. Delphine, one of Ibrahim’s daughters, is a brain scientist.34) EXT. TUDOR TOWER
Ibrahim and Betty fight about the STEMGARCHS drugs.35) INT. HOSPITAL – DAY Midpoint
Betty is given a precious vial of drugs called the Bright Space Brain Buffet.
A FEW MONTHS LATER. She reads more quickly and holds a zoom conference talking faster and with bigger words than ever before like a STEM college student.36) INT. LA ROCHE STONE MANSION – NIGHT
Jake is helping his father, Jean, pass on to a better place with a massage. Betty helps take out the corpse.37) EXT. CHURCH CEMETERY – DAY
Jean La Roche’s service is attended by townspeople, the kids, Litonya, and Jake but there is no sign of Ibrahim. Jake pleads with Betty to find out about Ibrahim’s research because he heard Delphine talking about it with Coral and Kisele.38) INT TURQUOISE CHURCH GYM – DAY
Jake loses his balance and drops weights because of his tremor as he works out with his kids. He may have Parkinson’s and is desperate to find cures for him and his mom.39) EXT. PALISADES – DAY
Litonya and Jake argue about the EE Company, saving the planet, and their degenerative diseases. She feels she will be recycled like rocks but is Jake still a Christian?40) INT. TUDOR TOWER – NIGHT
Ibrahim and Betty have successfully turned back time with their secret brain buffet. Ibrahim says that the STEMGARCHS control the distribution and we cannot give it to anyone.41) INT. NEW PALTZ LIBRARY Years Later
SERIES OF SHOTS
For Haunted Huguenot Street, Jesse attends all the events, talks to people of all ages, pores through books, and tries to uncover what happened years ago. He has a hunch that BB might be connected because of his arrest for assault and the way he or she is now. He finds a way to hypnotize Betty with the help of Aanadi, a yoga/meditation/hypnosis expert. The screams, details, visions, nightmares, and actions make them think Leo might have been the killer. The kids are good actors and follow Betty around, making notes. Delphine pretends it is a play they are rehearsing for a ship performance.42)FLASHBACK to Leo’s time in jail for assault, a short one because he was a model prisoner, always cleaning.
43) EXT. EAST RIVER ESPLANADE – NIGHT Plot Point Two
Betty is raped by a gang like the gang who beat her up as teenage boy and wiped out his right eye. FLASHBACK to the bloody eye and ZOOM BACK to the present glass eye.44)EXT. BOAT – DAY
Delphine nurses Betty’s bruises but as the gang tries to attack her, she throws them overboard into the river with Betty’s help. Betty has too much strength and power for a woman in her eighties and Delphine wants to know why.45) INT. LA ROCHE STONE MANSION – DAY
Jake pleads with Betty for the Alzheimer’s drug to get the sticky glue out of his mother Joan’s brain. Betty feigns ignorance because she is just a cook. They struggle with Joan and eventually she trips and falls because Betty secretly arranged the carpet that way. Her Living Will says DNI, DNR, no antibiotics, so Jake must refrain from giving her CPR.46) EXT. CHURCH CEMETERY – DAY
Joan is laid to rest beside her husband Jean, but their son Jake will not rest. His Parkinson’s is worse, and he is terrified it will progress to Lewy Body dementia. Betty didn’t come to this funeral for the first time. Where is she?47) INT. LA ROCHE LIBRARY – DAY
Litonya and Jake consult with Jesse, Aanadi, Kisele, Coral, and Delphine about Betty and the brain buffet.48) EXT. BOAT – NIGHT Crisis
Jake confronts Betty with his crimes as Leo. She then confesses to the COVID murders, the tenement and outdoor restaurant torches, and other non-sexual crimes. Jake makes a deal for secrecy in exchange for the precious drugs that Ibrahim will not give him, always pretending to be powerless.49) INT. TUDOR TOWER – NIGHT Climax
Betty cooks a delicious Mediterranean meal. Ibrahim is depressed because he lost his position as CEO and billions of dollars and has the last supply of Brain Buffet drugs. As they sit down to eat, Betty tries to give Ibrahim the poisoned part, but Ibrahim wants to share everything. Torn between a possible death with him now or exposure of her past crimes and imprisonment, Betty chooses the former, but eats more slowly.TIME SLOWS DOWN.
Ibrahim sinks forever into his sofa, so they think. Betty wobbles to the door opening for Jake and the kids who run in and up to Ibrahim’s office to get the secret drugs. Suddenly Ibrahim awakes and takes a weapon out of his pocket for a final, dramatic struggle that he loses when Jake is forced to finish him off. Jake takes the drugs right away, but Litonya refuses.
50) EXT. INWOOD COVE – NIGHT
Jake, Litonya, and the kids put Betty on her boat as her lights are going out. She gently rocks herself to death.FLASHBACK to a shot of Bobby rocking in the womb.
Conclusion Fate marries Will.
51) EXT. HUDSON RIVER – DAY
We transform to survive. We transform as we die.FINIS
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Janeen’s Character Outline
What I learned doing this assignment is that adding specific words will help me remember to add more character when the scenes are written. They also bring the outline to life more. I still have work to do on it….
Morgan Day – Traits: Insecure, Curious/Eager to learn; Perfectionist; Bold under pressure; Subtext Character Traits — Intimidated, Crafty;
Daniel Richards – Temperamental Artist; Insecure; Incredibly Good Designer; Perfectionist; Subtext Character Traits: Cloaking, Vengeful
REVISED OUTLINE
PLOT IN STRUCTURE
INT. RICHARDS HOME – EVENINGRichard slaps and punches his wife, Amber, because she didn’t have the kids in bed already when he got home. He yells at the kids, ranting about how perfection is demanded of him at work and they cannot do even the simplest things right.
INT. CLASSROOM – DAY
Superficial Morgan leaves her mind control class excitedly chattering with her classmates about mind control. Is mind control real or is it really just about boosting confidence? When a classmate finds she is Gavin Day’s wife, Morgan loses some of her cachet and withdraws from the conversation to run an errand.
INT. WOMEN’S SHELTER LOBBY – DAY
Morgan sees Amber Richards, her designer’s wife, with their two kids at a women’s shelter. Morgan chats excitedly about Daniel’s work for her and Amber pretends she’s there on a charitable mission, but Morgan sees the bruises, asks about them but gets no answers and is distressed.
INT. SHELTER OFFICE – DAY
Bridget, who runs the shelter, tells Morgan that Amber won’t press charges and is going back to her husband after being at the shelter only a few hours. Morgan realizes she needs to
do more to help women who are at such a disadvantage — perhaps using the Waterman Method or helping them to learn it. Bridget is skeptical.INT. DESIGN STUDIO – DAY
Morgan and Daniel Richards greet with fake kisses and she cautiously tells him she’s seen his wife at the shelter, donating clothes. He turns the subject and plots his revenge for Amber’s betrayal, fussing more than ever with his fashions.
INT. RICHARDS HOME – EVENING
Daniel berates and slaps around Amber for trying to escape from him and steal his kids while not keeping their private matters private. Says his reputation will suffer because of her and she would have nothing without him. She whimpers.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – DAY
Morgan eagerly commits to helping women with Waterman and decides Amber needs to empower herself to leave Daniel so she
puts her copy of Waterman in her purse. It will strengthen Amber’s self-confidence and help her feel she is capable of leaving Daniel.
INT. RICHARDS HOME ENTRY – EVENING
After greeting, Morgan follows Daniel to his studio. She slips a Waterman book onto a table with a significant look at Amber who is holding her kids in the darkened living room. Morgan is smug toward Richard since she has helped Amber.
INT. RICHARDS HOME STUDIO – EVENING
Morgan and Daniel consult on the design of a dress and both are fussier than normal about fit and embellishment due to his anger and her self-congratulation. As Daniel walks Morgan to the door, she sees Amber giving her the covert sign for help. Startled, she nods to Amber, stiffens her spine and exits.
INT. MORGAN’S CAR – CONTINUOUS
Morgan calls 9-1-1 and boldly states that a woman asked her to call for help at the designer’s address. Two males cops arrive and Morgan follows them to the designer’s house.
EXT. RICHARDS HOME – CONTINUOUS
Daniel is in cuffs, Amber and her kids are in tears and Daniel murmurs assurances of love and his swift return to them.
When Morgan arrives, Daniel rages at Morgan to mind her own business and stay out of their simple family spat. Morgan is shaken and unsure she helped Amber.INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – LATER
Morgan, making light of the incident and not mentioning her involvement, tells the guild that includes Bridget and Cinda (a cop) that Daniel has been arrested and she’s not sure what she’ll wear to the gala.
INT. POLICE STATION – EVENING
Daniel decides to capitalize on what the cops witnessed when Morgan lit into him. Because Amber refuses to testify, they side with him and ask for the restraining order he wants against Morgan.
INT. POLICE STATION – LATER
The two cops argue with Cinda and her partner, Rod, that it’s not abuse if the wife won’t press charges, but Rod sides with Cinda so we know he’s reasonable.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – EVENING
Cinda and Morgan update the guild. Daniel got a restraining order against Morgan for trying to incite Amber to leave him by giving her the book. It comes out that Morgan made the 9- 1-1 call. The guild members are sympathetic. Morgan realizes she is shackled and cannot help Amber directly, but wants to do more.
INT. CLASSROOM – DAY
Morgan’s Waterman instructor tells her that she cannot use Waterman to harm anyone or it will come back on her. She can, from a distance, empower an abused wife to have the strength she needs to escape from her abuser and Morgan straightens a bit.
INT. RICHARDS HOME – EVENING
Daniel, vengeful and angry, slaps around Amber again, taking her car keys and phone away from her. He’ll buy whatever they need. He spanks the kids for crying when they see him hit Amber ordering them to get control of themselves and properly represent the family and his business.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – EVENING
Morgan uses Waterman to heal Amber’s bruises faster. Then she empowers her and reduces her fear and emotional pain. All of this is done from a distance.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – EVENING
Morgan’s husband, Gavin, a wealthy writer, doesn’t think it’s ethical to help someone without their permission and mentions the restraining order. Deflated, she argues she’s staying away and feels compelled to do something.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – EVENING
The guild includes Cinda, Bridget, Emily (a lawyer) and ER nurse Rhonda. They explain abused women’s behavior and the fears/pride that govern their actions. Rhonda has heard of intentional medicine and Morgan is eager to learn more.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – LATER
Morgan’s husband warns her to stay out of Daniel’s way — he’s dangerous and if he will beat his wife, he won’t think twice about beating Morgan if he runs into her. Stick with her little mind control stuff. This infuriates her and she quietly seethes, resolving to do more.
INT. CAFE – EVENING
Bridget tells Morgan what shelter women need most to leave, citing one resident that Morgan can try to help with confidence and bruise healing.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – LATER
Morgan watches an intentional medicine lesson, tries the technique on herself and seems to feel better. Her husband warns her about interfering, but she says the shelter’s current residents need support, courage and empowerment. She leaves the room when Gavin tells her again not to interfere.
INT. POLICE STATION – EVENING
A wife Morgan has “helped” breaks the nose of her husband during a fight. Rod thinks it’s abuse, but Cinda checks the records and says it’s merely the wife fighting back instead of taking the beatings like usual. He ponders.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – TWO WEEKS LATER
Bridget tells Morgan that the woman they talked about has healed and developed the confidence needed to get a job at her old financial planning firm. Morgan is gratified and eagerly notes the name and situation of someone else at the shelter.
INT. POLICE STATION – MORNING
Cinda tells Rod about how successful Morgan has been. He is skeptical and wonders if it’s ethical.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – TWO WEEKS LATER
Bridget, Cinda and Morgan shares Morgan’s successes. She shares books and web addresses for the training and the other guild women join her in learning Waterman and intentional medicine.
INT. CLASSROOM – DAY
Morgan asks the Waterman instructor if Waterman from a distance is legally OK. He says the law doesn’t recognize it as a
true power and likens it to offering “thoughts and prayers” which is always OK. Morgan smiles slyly.INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – TWO WEEKS LATER
Bridget tells the group that three women who were repeat tenants of the shelter have now found the courage to leave their abusers for good. One struck her abuser with a brick, leaving him unconscious, as he tried to prevent her from leaving with the kids.
Another fought with her abuser getting a broken jaw out of the deal when her abuser did a lot more than slap her this time. The third, changed the locks on the house, but left to go to her mother’s with the kids, leaving the man without access to the house she had had before they started living together. Morgan ponders if it is ethical when she hears about the woman who hit her abuser with a brick after he hit her.
INT. POLICE STATION – DAY
Cinda find ways to lock up a couple more abusers on second calls by focusing on getting her boss to look more favorably on preventing further domestic violence.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – TWO WEEKS LATER
Rhonda says that Amber came through the ER with a broken wrist. She again refused to press charges when consulted privately but Daniel hovered and eventually took her home. Morgan, now with true purpose, resolves to find a better way to help Amber.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – EVENING
Daniel, certain Morgan is somehow in touch with his wife, threatens to kill Morgan if she continues to put thoughts of leaving into his wife’s head. Daniel is sure Morgan’s violated the restraining order. Morgan is baffled, visibly shaken and shuts off the intentional medicine video she was watching. Then she straightens, realizing that somehow, some way, Amber has been helped by her. It IS working.
INT. POLICE STATION – MORNING
Cinda works on her boss to take abusive patterns into consideration more often in charging — including checking hospital records, police calls, and shelter info before releasing an abuser.
INT. CAFE – EVENING
The guild ladies tell Morgan she is making a difference. Emily does pro bono legal work for a stream of women, Rod talks to the men while Cinda talks to the women on domestic disturbance calls and Bridget has more women and children leaving her shelter in success.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – EVENING
Morgan schools Gavin that Waterman gives abused women strength, takes away their fear and emotional pain and gives them the confidence to act. Waterman can’t be used for evil. Gavin says define evil. A man beating his wife? A wife striking back? She ponders. Is she helping or making women monsters like their husbands?
INT. ER – EVENING
Amber is wheeled in by paramedics, but won’t press charges saying she has been cut off from all of her friends, has no money or credit, no job, internet or car keys and Daniel has said he will take the kids if she leaves.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – EVENING
Rhonda relays Amber’s predicament to the guild and Morgan convinces them to use all of their combined efforts to empower Amber to protect herself and her children. They are very specific in their empowerment to protect herself and her children.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – EVENING
Gavin supports Morgan in court to fight the renewal of the restraining order. He worries that if Daniel finds out about her mind control work, they may say she is violating the restraining order.
INT. RICHARDS HOME – EVENING
Amber hasn’t done something to Richard’s exacting taste and he slaps her around for it, berating her for being sloppy instead of learning to be fastidious from him. Her bruises aren’t even healed. She hides her anger until he leaves and then says, “No more.”
INT. RICHARDS HOME – MORNING
Amber retrieves her hidden stash of pain pills from her ER visits. She contemplates them.
INT. FIBER GUILD MEETING – EVENING
Rhonda fears for Amber’s life because Daniel’s violence is escalating. The guild does Waterman and intentional medicine together to empower Amber to take care of herself and protect herself and her kids. Morgan urges Amber to be fierce in her protection of herself and her kids and does it often.
INT. RICHARDS KITCHEN – DAY
Amber bakes Richard’s favorite dessert and gets the kids to bed early so that he and mommy can have a special dinner. Amber is smiling.
INT. RICHARDS LIVING ROOM – EVENING
Amber hands Daniel a big piece of cake and a cup of coffee. She excuses herself to clean up the kitchen.
6.
INT. RICHARDS LIVING ROOM – LATER
Daniel is sleeping deeply in his recliner. With surgical precision, Amber positions the knife over his heart and pushes it in with great force. She pulls the knife out, waits, checks to see that he is no longer breathing, and then calmly calls the police.
INT. POLICE STATION – LATER
Amber is in an interrogation room, her fresh bruise obvious, her manner stoic. Cinda asks her what happened. She explains, ending that this was her only choice.
INT. POLICE STATION – DAY
Rod talks to the prosecutor about the guild’s work in encouraging women to fight back. There is now a history of women harming their abusers because of the guild. The prosecutor charges the guild members as accessories.
INT. POLICE STATION – LATER
The guild members, even Cinda, are all in separate interview rooms, charged as accessories to murder.
INT. MORGAN’S HOME – NIGHT
Gavin protectively declares he will testify if needed that she never talked to Amber and that all she did was the equivalent of thoughts and prayers. Morgan again shrinks, feeling coddled, not empowered.
INT. COURT ROOM – DAY
One after another, guild members testify to “thoughts and prayers” only. On cross-examination, they say that their prayers were asking that she would be strong and heal quickly, never that she hurt her husband. If Daniel was abusing Amber and she saw no other way out, it was self-defense.
INT COURT ROOM – DAY
Amber’s stabbing of Daniel is determined to be self-defense and she is ordered to counseling, but not deemed a danger to herself or her kids. The guild celebrates.
INT COURT ROOM – DAY
The guild presents a passionate defense including the Waterman teacher who swears he wasn’t involved. The charges are dropped. Morgan realizes she has truly made a difference and is seen by the courts and the guild as someone other than just “Gavin Day’s wife”.
INT. DESIGN STUDIO – DAY
Morgan is working with a female designer who says her neighbor is being beaten by her husband. Morgan confidently hands her a Waterman book with a link to intentional medicine training written inside the front cover. She smiles slyly and says “Thoughts and Prayers” are about all we can do for her.
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What I learned doing this assignment is to analyze the main character’s actions in each scene and improve them based on their character profile.
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Jodi’s Character Outline – Day 8
Doing this assignment I saw my limitations of traits and flaws that I had chosen before. Some things looked incomplete and some things looked one-dimensional. It took me awhile but I feel I improved upon Pam’s profile and now it shows more dimension, thus having more behavior to work from with her scenes. I also realized I needed to develop more Antagonists scenes. I started this outline with Pam’s first scene.
EXT. SAME – LATER
TENACIOUS/SPECIAL/FLAW: Show tunes echoing through the otherwise quiet canyon, Pam arrives on the scene and investigates the fatality wreckage with another Officer in her unit. She keeps the other officers on their toes. She finds a lead. While speaking to the Coroner she pops M&M’s constantly.EXT. BAILEY HOME – LATE AFTERNOON
COMPASSIONATE/FLAW: Before Pam knocks on the door she finishes the last bite of her sandwich. Pam informs Karen’s Mother and her boyfriend of Karen’s fatal accident.
INT. CLINIC – MORNING
TENACIOUS: Pam’s investigation gets stopped by the HIPAA act as she needs a court order for that, but she does finds out about the bounty hunters who hang out there.INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE – NIGHT
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL: Pam asks her Social Worker friend Chloe for advice on different avenues to get around hipaa and needs info asap, as an upsurge on hit and run deaths.
INT. PAM’S HOME OFFICE – NIGHT
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/FLAWS: Pam does research for the lack of funding. She finds masses of poverty stricken women and children, new orphanages, increased foster care staffing and foster home payments, welfare spiraling out of control. She finds articles of abuse, molestation, neglect of unloved, unwanted children. She looks into the death penalty. She pops M&M’s like there’s no tomorrow.INT. LIBRARY – NEXT DAY
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL: Pam asks the reference desk for updated stats on the state’s government budgets, surpluses, deficits and sources of the information.
INT. WELLES HOME – DAY
AGGRESSIVE/COMPASSIONATE/PARADOX/NEED: Pam relays her findings to her Parents. Her Father tells her to leave it alone. It’s God’s will who becomes pregnant and must carry this burden. Pam’s Mother acquiesces with his point of view. Pam is at odds with herself and her family’s way of thinking. She knows the situation is unacceptable.INT. POLICE HEADQUARTERS – DAY
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/WANTS: Pam asks her friend in MIS to help her extract information on new orphanages and foster homes in the last four years. She is given a pile of pages representing hundreds of orphanages. She also needs the Operation Life List (OLL) database to find the harmful bounty hunters.
INT. PAM’S DESK – SAMETENACIOUS/SPECIAL: She gets back and the Police Chief says the court order is not in yet, backlogged. She hums the song “Do you hear the people sing” from Les Miserables, under her breath.
INT. ELIZABETH’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/WANTSPam checks in with Elizabeth with no good news for her. She makes promises she might not be able to keep. Pam leaves and Elizabeth opens a bottle of Vodka chugging it as fast as she can.
INT. PAM’S CAR – DAY
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/COMPASSIONATEPam checks out the orphanages. Row after row of shoddy buildings, like barracks. Very young children and toddlers play outside, with ratty clothes, one worker per thirty children. Older children are working.
INT. ORPHANAGE ROW BUNKHOUSE – SAME
COMPASSIONATE/LOGICAL/WANTS&NEEDS
She gets a childcare worker to talk to her. The worker tells her they are all loved and cared for which sounds like she’s said this a thousand times before, unemotional as a script the workers have to say.
INT. MESS HALL – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/LOGICAL/AGGRESSIVE/WANTS&NEEDS
She falsely flashes her badge pretending to have authority to see how the children are taken care of and fed. There is little time to show affection to a child as each worker has their duties to perform. The dished out food is without love or care, your daily basics.
By page 10, you know what the movie is about:
EXT. PARK – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/WANTS&NEEDS/PARADOX
Pam shares with her friend that she feels her hands are tied, that she can’t give proper justice to many women and the unloved, unwanted children. Chloe tells her she has some people she wants her to meet.
INT. RESTAURANT – DAY
LOGICAL/COMPASSIONATE/WANTS/PARADOX
Pam meets Chloe’s group. A Physician is going to challenge the law with his upcoming abortion civil lawsuit. They’ve got a meeting Monday with the Governor. Can Pam meet them there?
INT. GOVERNOR’S OFFICE – DAY
AGGRESSIVE/TENACIOUS/WANTS/PARADOX
When pressed with questions the Governor excuses the group off as silly women and has his secretary escort them out.
INT. OUTSIDE THE GOVERNOR’S OFFICE – SAME
LOGICAL/AGGRESSIVE/WANTS/PARADOX
The group knows the misogynist Governor only cares about controlling women under the guise and pretense of being concerned of all ‘Heartbeats’, so how could he be pro-death penalty?
INT. SUPPORT GROUP – DAY
Elizabeth learns about the bounty hunters. She introduces herself to the group talking how her Daughter Karen died seven weeks ago. She shares that she numbs herself with booze and pills.
INT. KARRAS HOME – ENTRY WAY – LATE AFTERNOON
LOGICAL/PARADOX
Chloe says they want to start a campaign for the Governorship as elections are coming up in the next few months. Pam is very reluctant to do this as the Governorship was not in her family’s plan.
INT. VERONICA’S KITCHEN – SAME
Veronica finds out she’s pregnant and is surprised Carlos does not want to help. She calls her doctor.
INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT – SAME
Elizabeth tries to tell the police she got information that it’s the bounty hunters who killed her Daughter. She is ignored. Her eyes have steely determination as she exits.
INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE – EVENING
COMPASSIONATE/WANTS/PARADOX
Pam realizes she cannot turn her back on these thousands of unwanted children and the life they’ve been dictated to have. Deepening budget cuts and millions of new families living below the poverty line needing monthly financial help, Pam’s Daughter Eliana asks if she’ll try to challenge the way things are?
INT. ELIZABETH HOME OFFICE – NIGHT
She starts a website with STEVEN HAYS, Karen’s boyfriend. They call it “Target Practice”. They instantly see traffic on their site. Her face softens and she smiles for the first time in weeks.
INT. KARRAS KITCHEN – MORNING
LOGICAL/TENACIOUS/FLAW/PARADOX
Chloe and Pam discuss who should be contacted next to create the plan; (unions, organizations, free clinics and a network of concerned Mothers from all over the state), after she talks with her family.
INT. KARRAS DINING ROOM – NIGHT
LOGICAL/COMPASSIONATE/WANT
Pam discusses with her family why she’s wants to run for office. Her husband reminds her that the Governor is well established with the conservatives but there is a shot for her to beat him because they’re actually an overall minority in the state.
INT. WELLE’S HOME – DAY
LOGICAL/NEED/FLAW/PARADOX
Pam’s very conservative and pro-life parents are shocked at the news, they tell Pam she is a traitor to run against their beloved Governor for what they believe is an sinful and amoral cause. Pam eats cake that’s on the table.
FIRST ACT TURNING POINT:
INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE – DAY
TENACIOUS/COMPASSIONATE/WANT
Forced term women start calling her after hearing through the grapevine she’s trying to organize help. One call is a lead on a physician who the caller just got an abortion from. She gets the info.
INT. REPRODUCTIVE CLINIC – DAY
TENACIOUS/WANT/FLAW
Pam goes to this physician who is still giving abortions, and asks him to join their legal challenge of the SB 8 bounty hunter law. The group arranged getting a local news interview. Pam prefers Chloe be the spokesperson.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT – DAY
TENACIOUS/FLAW
Pam anonymously receives information on who’s on the bounty hunters hit list on the Texas ‘Operation Life List’ website. She feels things are starting to turn in a positive direction. Chloe pulls out of the live interview at the last minute. Pam finishes swallowing as the camera turns to her.
INT. WELLE’S HOME – DAY
Pam’s parents are embarrassed seeing Pam on television organizing funding for any physicians who challenge this law in court. They are furious and disillusioned.
INT. ELIZABETH’S HOME OFFICE – EVENING
She gives the license number to one of her henchmen of a person who brought a civil lawsuit of 10k against someone involved in helping an abortion. She dispatches her men throughout the state to stalk and attack.
Mid-Point:
INT. REPRODUCTIVE CLINIC – MORNING
Veronica learns she is eight weeks pregnant. The Gynecologist gives her the same pamphlet as Karen received, along with a business card with Pam’s name and number on it.
INT. KARRAS DINING ROOM – MORNING
NEED
Pam’s Brother Edward enters for the monthly family brunch but only sees the Karras’s. The parents are missing from this longstanding family tradition they have. “great video sis, whatcha have stuffed in there a hoagie?
INT. WELLE’S ENTRY WAY – DAY
NEED/PARADOX
Pam shows up with flowers for her parents. They give her an ultimatum to give up her endeavor or give up her family. She must choose.
EXT. KARRAS GARDEN – DAY
NEED/SPECIAL/PARADOX
The only remedy when feeling down is gardening. She half heartedly and intermittently digs a hole for a pot of flowers. She brushes off her parent’s ultimatum, wipes her eyes and continues digging.
INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE- MORNING
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/COMPASSIONATE
She asks Ellie for her help with making a website for the ‘Right to Choose’ movement. She is very happy to have this avenue open to women and children for communication.
INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/WANT
Her website crashes and her phone starts ringing off the hook as the need for help is high amongst children, welfare families and women who resent their forced babies. Many of the women don’t know how they can raise these mandatory unwanted children on 267.00 a month that the state gives them.
EXT. KARRAS GARDEN – DAY
TENACIOUS/COMPASSIONATE/LOGICAL/WANT/SPECIAL
Pam and Chloe discuss funds they’re trying to find to help people that have reached out to them, but the need is greater than they can raise as each year over 100,000 abused and neglected children in the state need her help. (Texas stats) and knowing 31,000 children in state foster care (2019, Texas stats) are now growing exponentially.
INT. ELIZABETH’S HOME OFFICE – EVENING
She dispatches three henchmen to harass, and create auto and home property damage for the three bounty hunters on her list who started a civil lawsuit right of action for the 10,000.
EXT. MONTAGE – SAME
We’ll see the three attacks. One will go wrong and someone is killed.
INT. VERONICA’S KITCHEN – DAY
Veronica calls the number on the card.
INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE – SAME
Pam’s volunteer Assistant DELORES SCHMIDT, tells Veronica of the one to two month back log. She will set the appointment immediately.
INT. KARRAS HOME OFFICE – SAME
Delores picks up the phone after her call with Veronica and makes the appointment for her.
INT. KARRAS DEN – NEXT MORNING
COMPASSIONATE/WANT/PARADOX
Pam sees a news clip of this group and is happy initially that other people are involved but the news clip then reveals that someone killed one of these deputized citizen’s turned bounty hunter.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATIONS BRIEFING ROOM – MORNING
NEED/PARADOX
The Police Chief commands an all hands on deck directive to find this group, excluding Pam because she could be one of the suspects since she is publicly for the same cause. Some of her fellow officers shun her.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT – DAY
TENACIOUS/AGGRESSIVE/PARADOX
Using the state-wide database on the sly, Pam tries to find out the source and leadership of this secret group.
EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/WANT
A man slips into Pam’s car while she is in the drivers seat. He has some information for her on the group.
INT. PARKING STRUCTURE – SAME
A bounty hunter gets attacked and beaten up by Steven Hays.
Second turning point at end of Act 2:
INT. KARRAS DINING ROOM – NIGHT
WANTS/NEEDS/FLAW/PARADOX
Being under-funded, slandered and falsely blamed of organizing the hits on citizens, along with being outcast from her family, Pam feels the odds are against her and thinks about quitting. She takes a pie out of the refrigerator.
EXT. MALL – DAY
Veronica notices someone is following her. She flips the guy off calling him a puto. He turns around so she can’t see his face.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT – DAY
Pam gets a phone call from an evangelical preacher. She writes down an address.
INT. EVANGELICAL CHURCH OFFICE – DAY
LOGICAL
Pam meets the evangelical anti-abortionist crusading preacher who is now pro-choice. He tells her why. Which gives her the faith to continue in this uphill battle.
INT. VERONICA’S CAR – SAME
A car is following Veronica aggressively. She fumbles but finds a card that says ‘Target Practice’ on it. She calls and tells them where she is.
EXT. ELIZABETH’S HOME OFFICE – SAME
She tells Veronica to stay where she’s at and she’ll dispatch someone to her immediately.
INT. VERONICA’S CAR – SAME
Veronica waits for the guys who are going to help her get rid of the man who is following her. They arrive within minutes.
INT. TELEVISION STATION – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/WANTS/FLAW
The Governors wife had an abortion in her younger years. Pam chooses not to use this information.
INT. TELEVISION STATION – EVENING
WANT/FLAW/SECRET/SPECIAL
Elias and Eliana give her moments of encouragement before she goes on air for the debate. Pam fears someone might have dug into her past. She hums a show tune under her breath when she starts to walk on stage.
INT. SAME – LATER
LOGICAL/FLAW/SECRET/WANT&NEED/
One candidate finishes his speech, Pam is introduced and she starts her concerns.
INT. A BOUNTY HUNTER’S HOME – NIGHT
The couple leaves their house. Steven and his computer wiz friend break in. The friend goes to the computer and starts hacking past the password, while Steven finds a wall safe easily.
EXT. SAME HOME – SAME
The couple approaches their home and sees the front door open, the safe is open and empty. Their place has also been trashed.
INT. ELIZABETH’S HOME OFFICE – SAME TIME
Steven hands her the valuables and account numbers they got from the home. She is pleased.
INT. KARRAS KITCHEN – MORNING
NEED
Ten days after the debate Pam’s telephone rings. She is congratulated for winning the primary.
INT. SAME
NEED/AGGRESSIVE/PARADOX
The phone rings again, Pam has a smile on her face expecting another well-wisher. Her face soon turns to anger. She is threatened to pull out of the race. She slams the phone down resolutely.
INT. SAME
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/WANT
Pam heads to her keyboard and starts typing an Op Ed piece on the devastation of the state and the enablers too willing to keep the status quo.
INT. OPERATION LIFE LIST HEADQUARTERS – DAY
TENACIOUS/AGGRESSIVE
Pam serves the OLL president a court order to search the premises. She confiscates documents listing bounty hunters and their addresses.
LIST – of MONTAGE
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/AGGRESSIVE
Pam starts knocking on doors and checking cars out for any indication of wreckage. She finds none.
INT. THOMAS WELLES CHURCH – MORNING
Thomas sees that a few of his singers and church members are missing. Quizzically, he begins his sermon.
INT. SAME – LATER
While shaking members hands Thomas hears murmurs of ‘draft dodger’. One CHURCH MEMBER tells him of the rumors and let’s him know the church that some of his congregation are now going to instead.
EXT. BOUNTY HUNTER HOME – DAY
Steven hot-wires a decked out car. A dog barks at him ferociously. Steven gives him dog treats. He pets the dog and drives off as the owner charges out of his house shouting. The dog sits silently.
INT. KARRAS LIVING ROOM – EVENING
NEED/PARADOX
Pam’s Mother Patricia visits. Her purpose is to blame Pam for the ‘trouble’ she is causing her Father. Pam is clueless about the incident. Patricia leaves abruptly.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT, PAM’S DESK – DAY
LOGICAL
Pam gets an anonymous call from the passenger of the monster truck.
INT. ELIZABETH’S DINING ROOM – LATE AFTERNOON
She is counting lots of money. They’ll have funding for a year. She now lives in a better home, but nothing takes her sorrow away. She feels her Daughter with her when Steven is around.
INT. MONSTER TRUCK DRIVER – NIGHT
TENACIOUS/AGGRESSIVE/WANT
Pam is told by the redneck driver that she can’t do anything. There’s no way she can prove he caused the girl’s death. He tells her his lawsuits bought him a dandy truck. He warns her that she better back off.
INT. CELL PHONE – SAME
AGGRESSIVE
Driving home from her confrontation with the redneck, she gets a call on her cell phone.
INT. KARRAS DINING ROOM – NIGHT
Her husband has dinner ready for her. This is one respite moment for Pam.
INT. VERONICA HOME – SAME
She is called with the date and time for her abortion.
INT. KARRAS KITCHEN – BEFORE DAWN
COMPASSIONATE/FLAW
The phone rings, it is the emergency room, a nurse tells Pam that Chloe has been beaten up and is unconscious, she is being notified as Chloe’s emergency contact. She starts to take a turnover with her, but immediately puts it back. She runs out the door.
INT. EMERGENCY ROOM – NIGHT
COMPASSIONATE/AGGRESSIVE
Seeing Chloe black and blue, swollen, and in a cast, Pam swears revenge for her.
EXT. MONSTER TRUCK REDNECK – NIGHT
AGGRESSIVE
Pam grabs the redneck’s collar and bangs his head on her knee. She uses a stun gun on him and curses him for hurting her friend. He screams about how he doesn’t know anything, she eventually is convinced.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT – DAY
AGGRESSIVE/WANT
Pam’s file for the dead girl is missing from her desk. She finds a small piece of paper that has Chloe’s name, address, and a time on it, on Detective Salts desk. She runs out of the office.
EXT. POLICE DEPARTMENT BUILDING – DAY
TENACIOUS/AGGRESSIVE/WANT
As she is running towards her car she see Detective Salt with one of his friends. After roughing him up she finds out the contract came from the Governor’s office.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT – SAME
AGGRESSIVE/WANT
Pam marches into the Chief’s office ignoring his meeting and tells him what happened. She wants to formally charge Detective Salt and wants to start an investigation into the Governor’s office of who requested the attack on Chloe.
EXT. KARRAS MAILBOX – MORNING
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL
Pam starts making inroads and the opposition is nervous. Pam receives a threat in the mail that is a copy of her Father’s military record which shows her Father as a Draft Dodger. She is warned to pull out of the race.
Crisis:
INT. EVANGELICAL CHURCH OFFICE – DAY
LOGICAL/PARADOX/WANT&NEED/PARADOX
Pam confides her challenge with the Preacher that she is torn between wanting to help her parents or helping to create a better life for her Daughter, and fighting for all women’s freedom of choice, she decides to continue in the fight.
INT. TELEVISION STATION – EARLY EVENING
COMPASSIONATE/WANT/FLAW
Pam is very glad to see Ashley Lee again, this time there are other people within hearing distance.
INT. ELIZABETH HOME OFFICE – EVENING
Five new bounty hunters to hit. She saves a special one for Steven.
INT. TELEVISION STATION – EVENING
LOGICAL/COMPASSIONATE/WANT/FLAW
Debate night. Pam annihilates the Governor with current statistics. The state has dire financial needs but the Governor only cares about controlling women under the falsehood of saving heartbeats, which is in direct opposition to his and his conservative legislatures pro death penalty law.
INT. DELORES CAR – DAY
Delores takes Veronica to the pick up location, as they drive they are followed by bounty hunters.
INT. KARRAS KITCHEN – NEXT MORNING
WANT&NEED/SPECIAL
The Governor falsely accuses Pam publicly as being a part of the vigilante group who are attacking the bounty hunters. Pam huffs and turns the television off. Sings loudly “The song of angry men…when tomorrow comes!” from a Les Miz song.
INT. KARRAS KITCHEN – SAME
COMPASSIONATE/LOGICAL/WANT
Pam reads the headline that another woman was found dead from an attempted self-abortion, which makes 112 now this year. Pam asks “at what point do the heartbeats of these women matter and the full lives they are living?” Her husband asks about the abortion pill.
EXT. MEETING LOCATION – SAME
They meet the pick up driver and the three other girls in the car going for the same purpose. A bounty hunter follows them for miles and then turns back when close to the state border.
INT. REDNECK’S HOME – MORNING
Steven goes after the redneck with a vengeance knowing that he is the guy who caused Karen’s death.
EXT. REDNECK’S FRONT YARD – SAME
Steven sets his red truck on fire, and then attempts to set the Redneck on fire. The cops arrest him.
INT. FATHER’S CHURCH – MORNING
The congregation thins out even more. Protesters chant ‘draft dodger and baby killer’ outside. A fire inspector tells Thomas he has been shut down for fire safety violations, and shouts to the congregation that everyone must leave.
EXT. KARRAS HOME – DAY
Pam and Eliana drive off in their car and are followed by the Operation Life List people.
INT. KARRAS KITCHEN – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/WANT/SPECIAL
Pam’s husband’s state government contract was cancelled and he and his crew were locked out. Pam heads out to the garden “I gotta go dig”.
INT. TRAFFIC INVESTIGATION UNIT – DAY
TENACIOUS/LOGICAL/WANT
Pam finds out who the leader is of the vigilante group attacking the bounty hunters. She goes out the door.
INT. ELIZABETH’S HOME – DAY
COMPASSIONATE/LOGICAL/AGGRESSIVE/WANT
Pam confronts Elizabeth, Elizabeth blames Pam and her department for not carrying out justice for her Daughter. She gently handcuffs Elizabeth after their exchange.
INT. KARRAS DEN – NIGHT
LOGICAL/WANT
The newscaster relays the execution of another death row inmate, this makes 50 ‘heartbeats’ killed since 2015 on the Governor’s watch. The Governor proves himself a double-speak hypocrite.
EXT. REDNECK’S HOUSE – LATE AFTERNOON
AGGRESSIVE/WANT
Pam arrests the redneck.
INT. CONVENTION CENTER BALLROOM – NIGHT
FLAW
Pam and her family arrive at the big ballroom. They are shown to the waiting room. Pam makes a beeline to the snack table.
INT. WELLE’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Pam’s votes are far below the Governor’s in the race. Thomas feels he must support his Daughter he and Patricia leave to be with her.
INT. CONVENTION CENTER BALLROOM – NIGHT
FLAW/NEED
Pam is nervously eating carrots. Ashley Lee enters with her make-up kit. Pam picks up the phone and walks out the door.
INT. RITZY HOTEL BALLROOM – NIGHT
AGGRESSIVE/WANT&NEED/
She threatens the Governor that she’ll use the information about his wife if his people don’t back off. Stop the threats and harassment of her and her family members or else.
EXT. CONVENTION CENTER BALLROOM – NIGHT
Without a pass Pam’s family try to enter the convention center where the celebration will be taking place, but is blocked by security detail, Patricia calls her Granddaughter.
INT. CONVENTION CENTER WAITING ROOM – NIGHT
The Granddaughter tells her Mother she’s going to run down to get the Grandparents and Uncle. Pam is surprised and pleased.
EXT. CONVENTION CENTER BALLROOM – NIGHT
The Granddaughter brings out three security badges for the Grandparents.
Climax:
INT. CONVENTION CENTER WAITING ROOM – NIGHT
NEED
Thomas lets Pam know how much they support her no matter their differing beliefs. Pam is overjoyed with their change of attitude.
Resolution:
INT. CONVENTION CENTER BALLROOM – NIGHT
Pam is now in the lead. They are very excited but also know the votes can turn again. Chloe and John are introduced, they beam at each other and are a little flirty.
INT. CONVENTION CENTER WAITING ROOM – NIGHT
NEED
The final results come in. Thomas and Patricia are awoken out of their sleep when everyone begins cheering. Pam, and her husband and Daughter rush out to the Ballroom. The family follows.
INT. CONVENTION CENTER BALLROOM – NIGHT
LOGICAL/WANT
Pam wins the election with a large number of the voters. In Pam’s acceptance speech she vows that her first line of business when she takes office is to obliterate the ‘heartbeat’ SB8 law.
INT. THOMAS’S CHURCH – MORNING
The Gospel choir is singing an upbeat song with the two singers who stuck with Thomas smiling at him. Thomas smiling back at them nods, and then looks out at his full congregation again. Pam and family are front and center singing along.
EXT. REPRODUCTIVE CLINIC – MORNING
The Governor’s Daughter exits a care clinic looking forlorn. The bounty hunters are waiting to start following her.
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PS 80 Michelle Damis Character outline
What I learned doing this assignment is that I luckily had quite a few character traits built in which boosted my confidence as a newbie. I also found my own path with this assignment in terms of creating a template I can pull out as I go through the scenes. I am submitting part of my outline but not all of it. In many places I would either underline what I added or I made notes to remind me to focus on a particular trait…for example D=determined/stubborn would que me to revisit those traits in particular when I am writing that scene. I do appreciate the structure and putting it into action but I’m going to not do the complete outline right now as I know I can use this very helpful technique anytime. I feel compelled to get caught up on assignments, so I’m going to forge ahead.
INT. COZY LIBRARY-ISH ROOM – NIGHT
An unseen man sits in a leather chair, cozy room, fireplace.
INT. VERY OLD INTERIOR – NIGHT
Ted narrating. “The year was (pick a time hundreds of years ago) show Ted in those clothes etc(or don’t show Ted just show the era)… “Wait, what am I doing? Totally wrong year…)
INT. TEDS “LAIR” ABANDONED BLDG – NIGHT
Narrated cont. “Correction, the year was ____ (could do 2022 or could totally have fun with 1987) He is sharing what his life is like being a vampire. Where he has lived, how he gets by, what other vampires do etc… Ted is getting ready to go out on the town-primping, choosing outfit etc….
EXT. DOWNTOWN STREETS – NIGHT
Ted walking to night club, narrating still. Explains more about vampires in general (folk-lore, misconceptions), etc… Observe humans being rotten to each other, more details about his feelings of disdain toward humans. We see Ted do something “kind” for a homeless human.(?dropped money and returned it –HONESTY-) “Just a bite” opportunity for humor/irony.
INT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT
Ted sees his vampire friend. Ted narrates background on “friend” (lots of sarcasm here)(very young in vampire years) explains a bit about other vampires in his life. We then see Nina in the night club in the background. Waitress approaches – Ted, “I’ll be having a drink later” comment. (Audience should think she is going to be a victim)
INT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT
(we leave narration) Ted sits down at bar with his vampire friend, they start chatting. Discussing something Ted has been reading (wise/knowledgeable)
INT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT
Nina arrives at bar next to Ted, orders drink. Nina impatient and short with bartender. Ted reacts with a sarcastic/practical comment. Nina ignores Ted is suspicious, she is distracted by a guy being too pushy with a girl nearby, she intervenes, Ted notices. Nina comes back to grab drink, snarky comments between Ted and Nina.
INT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT
Nina sits down with a few friends, brings her friends up to date with her situation, she has had to move back home with parents-not happy. No job, etc… D=determined/stubborn/impatient.
INT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT
Ted narrates observing humans. D=Honest/Sarcastic /Idealistc
INT. NIGHTCLUB – NIGHT
Ted and friend select that nights victim(s) (they select someone that deserves it from the audience perspective), Nina almost a target of his friend, Ted dissuades “She only looks like a bitch, pick someone else” (she is clueless that she was almost “dinner”)
EXT. OUTSIDE CLUB ALLEY – NIGHT
Quick scene of victims (don’t show any gore) Ted narrates as he walks how and why he picks his prey. <u style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>D=Wise/Practical/Idealistic
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Jennifer’s Character Outline
WHAT I LEARNED: Any action that a character takes needs to accurately reflect her motives in the scene. I ended up not doing too much addition for minor characters because it got too long to be useful for now, but it’s been a helpful exercise overall.
OUTLINE:
INT. SCHOOL GYM — DAY
Jessica, Amanda, and Ethan compete in the last round of the Young Philosophers Think-off. These aren’t your average high school students slinging around high-level philosophical concepts. It’s clear Amanda and Ethan are the naturals here and Jessica is the hard worker pushing to try to win via sheer force of will. Judges declare Amanda the winner, but Jessica and Ethan are neck and neck. Jessica is crushed and kicks herself for not going for it in the final round.
INT. JESSICA’S HOUSE — MORNING
While drinking their morning coffee, Jessica’s parents do a round of reverse engineering to determine why Jessica lost. Jessica sits listening, frustrated and desperate for their approval. We learn that Jessica’s parents are politicians (father is mayor, mother is a US senator), and her father wants to teach Jessica all the greasy ways he used to get ahead. Jessica’s mother isn’t impressed by that but still tells Jessica to focus on the goal, part of which is to go to Chapman U and create a “power base.” Jessica’s father confirms he and Jessica will go on a hike the next day. She balks, but he reminds her it was always her favorite, that it will be relaxing because she “knows it like the back of her hand.”
Later:
INT. JESSICA’S ROOM — NIGHT
Jessica kicks herself for hesitating in the final round. Why didn’t she just go for it? She’s stressed almost to the point of unhinged. She looks out her window and sees her younger neighbor Jillian looking at her timidly from her own bedroom window. Jillian looks away instantly when caught.
INT. SCHOOL CLASSROOM — DAY
Jessica and Amanda learn of the prestigious scholarship to Chapman U for one service-oriented junior before AP Literature class. Jessica instantly starts jotting down thoughts on how to win into her strategy notebook and texts her father that they need to make a plan, but doubts herself when Amanda mentions she’s already fulfilled many of the scholarship’s public service requirements and Jessica has not, instead focusing on her tech skills (establishes tech expertise). How can Jessica look the part of the good citizen and stat? Her secret hatred of Amanda and Ethan becomes clear, knowing that the three of them are the clear frontrunners. Amanda gets that Jessica is flipping out and looks at Jessica, mouthing the words to a formula Amanda has worked out about how Jessica operates. [NEED TO STREAMLINE THIS]
Ideas to incorporate potentially:
“I’m not even sure I want to go to Chapman. I can’t decide. I’m torn between Yale and Juilliard and just can’t decide which of my talents I want to focus on for undergrad.” (This would be terribly painful for Jessica to hear — that Chapman is Amanda’s consolation prize.)
“Don’t you ever think about anything other than joining the rat race and getting ahead, Jessica? You’re a teenager. Enjoy it while it lasts. One day we’ll all wake up wrinkled and aware that we’ve wasted some part of our potential.”
“Cut the pretention, Jessica. Not all of us have parents who are practically royalty, and we still do OK.”
“I might tackle this. I can always go for a good challenge. They’re so rare.” Smirk reflects sarcasm.
“This could be good for a laugh.” (Jessica would seethe over this, noting that Amanda spent 2 weeks in London at a workshop and now thinks it somehow makes her British.)
“What would make you think I wouldn’t want this scholarship? My parents aren’t made of money.”
Teacher might announce that Amanda and Jessica should listen up at the beginning, and Jessica would hate being lumped in with Amanda, whom she sees as inferior.
BY PAGE 10:
We know that Jessica is on a mission to win at the competition and life in general at all costs. (We just don’t know which costs that entails yet.) She has her father as an ally.
INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA — DAY
Jessica does service project (chocolate truffle fundraiser for children’s charity). She literally forces a low-level (rankwise) scholarship competitor out of helping so she looks better because it’s easier to pick on the “little guy” rather than a true peer. Amanda notices and defends the competitor’s actions, noticing that the competitor isn’t likely to outrank either of them in the scholarship competition. Jessica starts preparing for next “achievement” while still at event.
EXT. RACE EVENT SIGNUP TABLE — DAY
A couple days later Jessica sits at table signing people up for a charity race while sporting her own number for the race. Jessica walks up to get her number and notes that she, Amanda, Ethan, and 3-4 others are leading in the competition according to her inside source. Amanda casually mentions oversleeping and hasn’t prepared for the race, which angers Jessica. Neighbor Jillian comes up, Jessica says a snarky hi, and Jillian runs in the race as well. Jessica walks away from the table to warm up and seethes secretly to her father (mother is rarely there), who reminds her to save some of this anger to push through at the end of the race, harping on followthrough and showing outwardly that she’s calm and cool. “Act the part, dear.”
EXT. RACE FINISH LINE — DAY
Jessica sails past other runners (including a teacher who cheerfully says “It’s all for a good cause”) including a runner from another school — another scholarship competitor — who is hurt. Others stop to help the guy out while Jessica secretly mocks them for being weak in a voice mimicking her mother. In V.O. we hear Jessica share her desire to win and her anger at the current scholarship situation. Amanda has been running the race but gives up cheerfully and walks instead. Jessica can’t understand how she can be so blase about losing. Ethan has stopped to help the injured runner, but comes from behind to beat Jessica while we hear her V.O. hesitance as she thinks through her anger toward her scholarship competitors, which slows her down because she’s lost in thought and holds back at the end. Ethan and Amanda discuss Jessica being on the verge of cracking from the pressure, bond over that and their own admissions of fear of failure.
EXT. RACE EVENT OFFICIALS’ STAND — DAY
Jessica secretly turns Amanda in on a strange technicality (either accidentally curses under her breath or wears ear buds and listens to music, which are both against the rules), so she loses her standing in the race. Amanda laughs it off, which angers Jessica as she attempts to convince Amanda how important this was for Amanda’s standing in the competition. Projection much?
INT. JESSICA’S BEDROOM — NIGHT
Jessica reads book on how to best others verbally. We see a stack of books like How to Win Friends and Influence People and acting books. V.O. Jessica shares that even though her parents have been grilling her like she’s in court for years, she’s decided to add to her rhetorical repertoire to include the subtle art of manipulation. Her mother thinks books like these mean she’s trying too hard, but Jessica doesn’t want to leave anything to chance. She knows she’s not likeable the way she is.
INT. SCHOOL ACTIVITY ROOM — EVENING
Amanda and Ethan discuss Jessica and themselves being 3 of the 6 semifinalists left in the competition while waiting for a history academic competition to start. They are concerned with Jessica’s behavior, decide to keep an eye on her. Jessica enters with stacks of notes and reviews her flashcards intensely. V.O. shares her insistence that she deserves this win. Jillian is a junior member of Jessica’s school team.
Later:
Jessica competes with Amanda on her team (Ethan is there as moral support for Amanda; they are getting closer), and when the opponent reveals a tiny weakness, Jessica twists the knife in the guy’s insecurity using a tactic she just learned from her book. He manages to answer correctly, winning the competition, but only barely. Jessica is visibly frustrated it didn’t work, knowing how close she came to succeeding, tries to put on a stone face but doesn’t manage it.
INT. SCHOOL CLASSROOM — DAY
Amanda quietly checks on Jessica to ask if she’s OK after losing the night before. Jessica hisses a mean response, but softens in how she looks at Amanda. In V.O. Jessica shares that she can’t let herself get soft, practices the technique that didn’t work in the academic competition in the previous scene.
SECOND TURNING PT AT END OF ACT 2:
After “helping” another competitor get disqualified for the scholarship, Jessica realizes that just beating or eliminating her opponents isn’t actually making her look good in the eyes of the scholarship committee. She has to try the principle of “Be magnanimous” that she learned from her book, needs to look convincingly kind outwardly and show good sportsmanship regardless of how she feels inside. If that doesn’t work, she will have to take drastic action.
INT. SCHOOL GYM — NIGHT
Jessica runs important fundraiser at homecoming dance (she has forced her way into leadership as a junior) while two other scholarship competitors help out. She is there alone with no allies so she talks to Amanda briefly, who came with Ethan. She catches two other competitors making out, which is against the morality clause of the scholarship, and then …
INT. PUBLIC BATHROOM — NIGHT
Jessica tips off the dance chaperone and anonymously notifies the scholarship committee that the other competitors have done something against the rules. She smiles. Jillian sees her there but walks away quickly when observed.
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY — DAY
Ms. Sarah Collins (teacher on scholarship committee) looks on with concern as Jessica verbally abuses Jillian and accuses Jillian of stalking her, then turns around to greet Amanda cheerfully.
INT. JESSICA’S HOUSE — DAY
While Jessica’s mother drills her on facts for the next academic competition as Jessica stuffs items into bag for charity, Jessica interrupts to note that just eliminating competitors isn’t working and that she’s trying to show her commitment to service outwardly. Her mother encourages her to “think outside the box.” How can Jessica get ahead? A gleam in her eyes.
INT. JESSICA’S ROOM — NIGHT
How to beat them? Oppo research. Jessica types up a detailed analysis of Amanda and Ethan. But she also needs something else to help her shine.
INT. SCHOOL CLASSROOM — DAY
Jessica speaks conspiratorially with Amanda to befriend her, an act of manipulation using rules Jessica has learned through her reading. Caught up in the moment, Amanda accidentally reveals info that makes Jessica jealous and shares that Ethan has a deadly food allergy to hazelnuts.
EXT. SCHOOL PARKING LOT — NIGHT
Jessica works to befriend Ethan before a competition. He mentions a recent win that gives him more points toward the scholarship. He is in first, Amanda in second, and Jessica in third place for scholarship. Ethan sees through Jessica while Amanda does not, not exactly anyway. Jessica scans lines for an audition of some sort.
CRISIS:
All other students besides Jessica, Amanda, and Ethan have been eliminated from the competition. Jessica is more committed to winning than ever, but Amanda and Ethan continue to best her. She’s going to have to go outside her comfort zone.
INT. SCHOOL — DAY
Jessica submits another justification (TBC) for why she should win scholarship, thinking it will get her ahead.
INT. SCHOOL LUNCHROOM — DAY
Two days later, Jessica checks her phone and sees scores have updated, but she’s still in third place. Her world is rocked. What can she do to push things over the top?
INT. BOOKSTORE — DAY
Jessica buys a stack of true crime, chemistry, and medical books in cash while wearing a cap and plain sweatshirt/hoodie. Ms. Mitchell is also there and sees her, is going to say hello and hesitates. Jillian lurks in the background and takes a photo of the books Jessica just bought. Jessica doesn’t see either one and leaves.
INT. JESSICA’S BEDROOM — NIGHT
Jessica starts overachieving at trying to find a way to kill herself by overresearching different methods, getting overwhelmed, and resolving to do X (funny — possibly writing a program to help her make the decision of how to do it). Just as she gets started trying to follow through, her father walks in and gives her a creepy pep talk about going the extra mile and needing this win. Jessica smiles weakly and puts away what she was about to do. Her mother interrupts to talk political strategy with her father and says to her, “You’ve got to put yourself in front, Jessica. No one will do it for you.”
CLIMAX:
Jessica is on a mission to win now at all costs.
INT. SCHOOL LIBRARY — DAY
Jessica runs a protocol on the library computer that makes her work totally anonymous and shuts down the video camera. She then forges something implicating Ethan doing something unethical TBC and forwards it to Ms. Collins.
INT. CLASSROOM — DAY
Ms. Collins speaks seriously to Amanda and Jessica about Ethan’s sudden elimination. Amanda is upset for Ethan and mentions being worried about Jessica’s parents putting pressure on her. Jessica is grateful but also too proud to admit it. V.O. Jessica lets us know she hadn’t counted on Amanda feeling worse because of Ethan’s elimination. Something to exploit? Then …
INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY — DAY
Jessica exits classroom and sees Jillian watching her. She walks over to Jillian and tells her she doesn’t appreciate Jillian following her around. (This will link back to the materials in the book on manipulation that Jessica read, and it’s clear Jessica is getting more paranoid.) Jillian tries to defend herself, but Jessica insists Jillian back off.
EXT. JESSICA’S BACKYARD — NIGHT
Jessica sits in front of a fire burning in a fire pit. Her father peeks out at her and asks what she’s doing. Her answer: strategizing how to win. He nods his approval. Jillian looks out a window of her house and sees Jessica by the fire.
EXT. SCHOOL GROUNDS — NIGHT
Jessica arrives at the school with coffees in hand for herself, Amanda, and Ethan. An academic competition is about to start. Ethan confirms what’s in the coffee to make sure it’s safe and drinks. Amanda doesn’t make it to the event at the last minute.
INT. SCHOOL GYMNASIUM — NIGHT
Jessica and Ethan help put things away after competition and walk outside to the parking lot carrying a heavy item (table, chairs).
EXT. SCHOOL PARKING LOT — NIGHT
Ethan has acted normal until now, but turns on Jessica once no one is looking because he knows she must have been the one to get him in trouble. He still has an “in” to get into Harvard, he says, but he really wanted Chapman and may not even get in now, never mind losing the scholarship. He asks how she did it. Jessica discusses it casually while grabbing something out of her bag. A glove and a bottle of … something. She makes sure no one is looking, puts the glove on while Ethan is wrangling the item around in his car’s trunk, and dabs the edge of the bottle carefully with one gloved finger. He is almost done loading the trunk and calls her a piece of work. She looks like she might be softening or even try to kiss him, then puts one finger up to his mouth and says, “Shhh.” He starts to feel strange instantly and breathes funny. He looks for his bag and collapses, asking Jessica to go inside and get his adrenaline shot. For a moment she is in shock, then visibly relaxes, turns on fake tears, and runs inside screaming that she needs help.
INT. SCHOOL GYMNASIUM — NIGHT
Jessica looks frantically for Ethan’s backpack and riffles through it to search for the medicine while the other couple people look on. An ambulance siren rings in the background.
INT. JESSICA’S KITCHEN — NIGHT
Jessica’s father asks how that night’s competition went while eating and reading a business magazine. She glibly says a contestant died from anaphylaxis and that it was horrible. Her mother says, “Oh?” and gets back to eating her bloody steak. Her father murmurs “Mmmm-hmmmm” and keeps reading. Jessica smiles.
INT. CLASSROOM — DAY
The next morning, Amanda is visibly shaken. Jessica leans over, buddy-buddy, and says it’s just the two of them now. Amanda tells Jessica she doesn’t have to be strong and if she ever needs to talk to someone, she’s there for Jessica. A moment of gratefulness (or is it recognition?) in Jessica’s eyes.
EXT. SCHOOL EXIT — DAY
Jessica flags down Amanda and asks if Amanda has time to talk after Ethan’s funeral, that her parents don’t understand what it’s like to lose “a peer and a friend” like Ethan. Jessica tells her where to meet (making it look coincidental, but in V.O. Jessica shares how she makes this happen).
EXT. HIKING TRAIL WITH CLIFF — DAY
Jessica and Amanda walk the trail and talk about the funeral. Amanda first tries to talk kindly to Jessica, and they talk about how Ethan died, Amanda noting how scary it must have been for him — and for Jessica to witness. Amanda asks why Jessica wants the scholarship so much. They approach the top of the trail where there is a cliff. Jessica pretends to lose her balance [DO THIS AS A JOKE BETWEEN FATHER AND DAUGHTER EARLY ON!]. Amanda attempts to help Jessica, who dodges her such that Amanda loses her balance and slips off the side of the cliff, hanging on by a thread. Jessica could help but weighs her options – help Amanda and look like a good Samaritan, which would win her points in the competition? Or let Amanda fall. We then see Jessica walking away, a self-satisfied look on her face, as Amanda struggles and slips.
RESOLUTION:
Jessica attends both rivals’ funerals, wins the competition, and rules the school. Another younger student who’s been there all along wants to follow in Jessica’s footsteps.
INT. JESSICA’S LIVING ROOM — NIGHT
Jessica convinces the police that she is innocent of Amanda’s death. The detective asks if she thinks there is a connection between the two deaths. Jessica says they were all great friends and hints that Amanda took Ethan’s death hard. Jessica’s mother and father are the picture of concerned parents while police are there. Then her mother turns to Jessica and asks if this means she’s won the scholarship, a proud smile on her face. Jessica walks into …
INT. JESSICA’S KITCHEN — NIGHT
She pours a cup of coffee, reaches into the spice cabinet and pulls out a bottle we’ve seen before, hazelnut extract, which is what she used to kill Ethan. She hums to herself, happy for a brief moment in time.
INT. CEMETERY — DAY
Jessica attends Ethan’s funeral. She drops cryptic hints that she is responsible for his death, but everyone assumes she is being hyperbolic due to grief and tries to reassure her of her innocence.
EXT. FUNERAL HOME — DAY
Jessica has taken over Amanda’s speech pattern (need to develop this in beginning) when speaking to classmates who ask how she’s holding up.
INT. SCHOOL AUDITORIUM — NIGHT
Ms. Collins announces the winner of the scholarship: Jessica. Much ado. Jessica gives a speech talking about all the service and sacrifice it took to get where she is and how taking action is critical to success. “Always be the best, and forget about the rest.” Someone asks Jessica what she hopes to do in the future. Her answer: Become the second female Senator from her state before heading to the White House. Her parents beam. In the background is younger student Jillian, Jessica’s next-door neighbor, who has been there all along looking on and wants to follow in Jessica’s footsteps. Jillian approaches Jessica and wants to help her older neighbor take on the world. Jessica welcomes her into the fold.
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