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Day 8 Assignments
Reply to post your assignment.
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15 Replies
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Don writes great hope/fears
What I learned doing this assignment Filling in the major plot points gives me a roadmap into the screenplay. HOPE/FEAR makes my screenplay more exciting and emotional.
Concept: Ill prepared urban explorers become trapped on an abandoned riverboat in the Louisiana bayou.
Conflict: The riverboat is a drug lab, their canoe was stolen, they’re surrounded by gators and meth heads in the swamp.
Act 1
Opening: Four college friends met after five years to hike into the bayou to look for an abandoned riverboat.
HOPE: That the trip into the bayou will be a fun time to rekindle old friendships
FEAR: Resentments from the past threaten to ruin the day.
HOPE: When they find a cabin of swamp folk in the bayou, they hope for some friendly guidance as to how to reach the abandoned riverboat.
FEAR: They’re told no boat exists.
HOPE: They hope the swamp folk are wrong and continue deeper into the bayou.
FEAR: Insects and swamp creatures scare and annoy the hikers.
Inciting Incident: A local bayou boy warns them away from the riverboat.
FEAR: The swamp boy warns them away from the boat.
HOPE: The hikers now knew there is a boat and go deeper into the bayou.
Turning Point: Once aboard the riverboat, the boy steals their canoe, stranding them.
HOPE: Aboard the boat, the hikers hope to find interesting treasures.
FEAR: They find a drug lab and drugs.
Act 2
New Plan Get off the boat and back to shore
HOPE: They hope to return without encountering the meth cooks.
FEAR: Their boat is gone.
Plan in Action Swim or wade to shore
HOPE: They hope to make it to shore without encountering a gator.
FEAR: Gators, snakes, leeches.
HOPE: Once on land, they hope to get back to civilization.
FEAR: Someone is bitten by a water moccasin.
Midpoint Turning Point someone is bitten by a snake and they must return to the boat
HOPE: They hope to make it back to the boat again.
FEAR: Covered in leeches, they make it back onboard.
Act 3
Rethink Everything someone must stay with the snakebite victim while the others go for help
HOPE: Two hope to make it back to shore.
FEAR: That loud splash could have been a gator.
New Plan Reason with the meth heads and get the canoe back
HOPE: Two hope that the folks in the cabin have a phone.
FEAR: The eth head kills one of the hikers.
Turning Point: Huge failure/Major Shift Meth heads kill someone. The other returns to the riverboat pursued by meth heads
Act 4
Final Plan Fight the meth heads and take their boat
HOPE: The hiker hopes he can get back aboard.
FEAR: Gators, snakes, leeches and meth heads.
HOPE: The snakebite victim is alive.
FEAR: He is, but failing fast.
HOPE: They can beat survive the meth heads.
FEAR: The meth heads board the boat.
HOPE: They can get to the meth heads boat.
FEAR: A meth head is surprised and killed by the snake bite victim.
Climax/Ultimate expression of conflict A final showdown on the riverboat
HOPE: The two surviving hikers hope they can get to civilization.
FEAR: The swamp boy ambushes them.
Resolution The urban explores steal the boat and call the police
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Josh Lee’s Hope/Fear
HOPE: the characters just need to leave the building when the threat of a supernatural presence emerges.
FEAR: they can’t since the only accessible doors are barricaded shut.
HOPE: the guards can just use their cell phones to call for help. (no one else is allowed a phone).
FEAR: both guards’ cell phones are inexplicably missing.
HOPE: the group locates a secret passage of sorts in the basement of the building that no one knew existed.
FEAR: it’s much too dangerous/impossible to make work/access.
HOPE: at one point they think they’ve found someone who clearly doesn’t belong.
FEAR: but it’s the “ghost” outfit that someone was clearly wearing earlier and they’re all aware at this point they’re involved in some kinda game.
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Auguste writes Great Hope/Fear!
I’m not sure I did this lesson right, but I do understand what you asked for… a little more time might have helped.
ACT 1
1. A screaming mad girl is caught on the sidewalk in front of a burning house by the firemen and taken to the hospital.
2. The social worker thinks she is insane and puts her in a security ward.
3. The girl escapes.
4. The social worker finds her hiding behind a bush in the back yard of the burned-out house.
ACT 2
1. The girl is not insane. She is frightened and very docile. There is a bruise on her forehead, and she has lost her memory. The social worker is sure she made a mistake. This does not seem like the same girl she saw on the night of the fire, but just to be sure she takes her to the doctor for an evaluation.
2. The doctor finds that the girl is sane, but she has amnesia. He releases her to the custody of her aunt, but this bothers him because the firemen insist the fire was arson.
3. When Ivy goes into her room at her aunt’s boarding house the window slides open. Her twin sister climbs in and tells her she must not tell the aunt, the social worker, or the doctor that she is there.
4. Each night Ivy sees her sister climb out the window. She does not come back until dawn.
5. A house is burned down in the neighborhood, and a woman is killed.
ACT 3
1. The social worker checks with the aunt. The fire is verry similar to the one that burned Ivy’s house. The aunt tells the social worker that Ivy was in the house all night long.
2. Ivy fights with her sister. She thinks it was Iris who started the fire. They must be quiet… they don’t want Aunt Alice to know Iris is in the room. Iris can leave the room any time she wants too but Ivy can’t, she has no memory and is helpless. She does not even remember how to read.
3. Another house is burned down. The Doctor and social worker thinks Ivy burned her house down, and the house with the woman in it.
4. The social worker checks with the people in the neighborhood where Ivy lived. No one is sure if there were two girls. They only moved in a few days before the fire, but they all say they saw only one girl.
5. The social worker checks behind the bush where she found the Ivy hiding. She finds two hair brushes. Two boxes of crayons. Two coloring books, and two lunch boxes.
ACT 4
1. The social worker knows there are two girls.
2. She comes to the boarding house to get Ivy.
3. Ivy and Iris are fighting in the room.
4. The social worker throws the door open. One girl jumps out the window. The social worker grabs the girl in the room by the arm and arrest her.
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Jason Writes Great Hope/Fear!
What I learned doing this assignment is that thinking in a Hope/Fear context helps to fill in the blanks from a plot and scene perspective to make sure the story keeps moving.
I’m still working out parts of the story, but here’s a sampling of my Hope/Fear train:
Act 1:
HOPE: Wife and Husband on their honeymoon
INCOMPATIBILITY: There is tension under the surface.
DANGER: Bomb sirens blare; something is happening – panic, disbelief, denial. People rush into the bunker.
DESTRUCTION: The bomb explodes outside; the building is leveled. They wouldn’t have made it if Prepper didn’t close the door when he did.
HOPE: They are safe inside. But TRAPPED.
DEATH: They come across a Dead Man. His throat is slit.
NOT SURE WHO OR WHAT THE REAL THREAT IS: The killer is likely someone trapped inside.
Act 2:
2nd Act Goal: Survive encounter with Prepper.
HOPE: There’s a radiation monitor inside to tell them how bad the outside is… but…
TRAPPED/DANGEROUS: It’s pretty bad, and they can’t get out, and there’s probably a killer among them.
HOPE: There is food and water, but it has also been used as a storage closet. There are tanks of refrigerant stored inside. Someone notes this could be dangerous with toxic gas under pressure.
DANGER/DEATH: Drug Addict is high and freaks out from being trapped inside. He goes off the rails and needs to be subdued. The combo of drugs and excitement makes his heart stop and he dies.
HOPE: Though the tension is high, everyone is discussing calmly. They pat down each other and search purses and backpacks.
DANGER: They find a pistol in the false bottom of a backpack (it seemed too heavy to be empty).
LOSS OF A COMPANION/DEATH: Jeopardy Guy accidentally shoots Inheritance Girl.
PERSON ON THE EDGE: Jeopardy Guy turns the gun on himself. He dies.
THREAT: Prepper gets the gun. Now he is in charge.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Act 3:
HOPE: Prepper doesn’t kill them all; maybe he’s reasonable.
TRAPPED/PRISONER: The Wife, Husband, and Deaf Girl (now awake) are now being held hostage.
HOPE: Prepper is hurt and needs help. He makes Wife tie up the others and help patch him up.
HOPE: The three captives hash out a plan. The plan has been sprung, as Wife and Deaf Girl make their moves.
ATTACK/INJURY: Prepper sees them making their move and attacks. Knocks out Husband with gun. Goes after Deaf Girl, who is trying to get a weapon.
HOPE: Wife gets to the door.
ATTACK/INJURY: After knocking down Deaf Girl, Prepper goes after Wife and stops her from getting away.
HOPE: Husband is up and helping Wife.
DEATH/LOSS OF COMPANION: There’s a struggle for the gun and it goes off. Husband has been shot. Dies.
TRAPPED/PRISONER: Deaf Girl is injured. Prepper ties up Wife with cord.
Act 4:
HOPE: Prepper insists he didn’t kill the first man and everything since then has been a terrible accident. He seems like not much of a threat, but is he mad?
INJURY: Deaf Girl isn’t doing well with her injury, is woozy from a concussion. Wife pleads with Prepper to help her.
HOPE: As Prepper is distracted, Wife is able to free herself.
ATTACK: Wife goes after Prepper.
HOPE: Deaf Girl makes her way up – she’s going to try to escape.
DANGER: Prepper has the upper hand on Wife.
TICKING CLOCK/IMPENDING DOOM: In the fight, a tank is damaged and toxic fumes spew from it, quickly filling the room.
HOPE: Deaf Girl is free, but instead of leaving, she runs to the Dead Man, has a moment, kisses him. WTF?
TICKING CLOCK/IMPENDING DOOM: Fumes fill the room. Prepper is choking Wife. Deaf Girl starts climbing to the ceiling. Wife tries to yell at her to escape.
HOPE: Wife is able to escape and kill Prepper.
DANGER/TICKING CLOCK: Deaf Girl will not leave, not before she gets what she’s after.
DEATH: Deaf Girl falls to her death, unable to breathe.
HOPE: Rescuers have just arrived to help people out of the bunker. Wife is free.
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Still brainstorming this but so far very loose…
Act 1:
• Opening: A couple taking a drive through the countryside have just started their vacation.
• Inciting Incident: The grocery store on Google maps is closed so they decide to stop at a Castle Restaurant.
• Turning Point: They are invited to dine by two charming tour guides and by the end of the meal are too tired to continue on their journey and accept the offer of a bed for the night.
Hope/Fear.
• The couple are playful enjoying the drive and the scenery but they forgot to pack a lunch so they search Google
• Signal is poor just about make out a grocery store in 2 km (isolation)
• The grocery store and café are closed but there’s a caravan nearby and they knock on the door (helpless)
• A guy with a big dog who answers tells them there’s a Castle with a Restaurant up ahead (unpredictable and hope)
• They arrive at the Castle and they decide to take one of the Doctor’s Jet Lag pills (danger)
Act 2:
• New plan: They wake up after hearing strange noises.
• Plan in action: They want to leave.
• Midpoint Turning Point: They realize they are locked in the Castle and are not alone.
• The couple stay over and are woken up by strange noises (threat)
• They are afraid decide to pack up and leave
• All the doors are locked they are trapped
• The jet lag pills are causing them to hallucinate (out of control)
• They begin to see the ghosts but they don’t know if they are real
Act 3:
• Rethink everything: They make a deal with the ghosts.
• New plan: Allow us to leave and we’ll help you pass over.
• Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: Two of the ghosts pass over but take the mining CEO with them.
They decide to communicate with the ghosts (what do they have to lose)
The ghosts kidnap the CEO
Act 4:
• Final plan: One of the Tour Guides tries to help the Doctor.
• Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: All hell breaks loose.
• Resolution: The CEO and Doctor escape and vow to become better people.
One of the tour guides appears from nowhere (hope)
The ghosts don’t like this (unpredictable)
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Renee’s 4-Act Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is how to create more tension and relief throughout the script to ensure that it is engaging.
Concept: When a three-day journey into space is derailed by space junk, the all-civilian crew must find a way to work together to fix the damaged navigation system and return home.
Main Conflict: they only have 90 minutes to find a way to work together and fix the damaged systems.
Act 1:
• Opening: the protagonist stands in front of a whiteboard looking over schematics for a mechanical system.
• Inciting Incident: she is awarded a prestigious award in mechanical engineering and a spot on the all-civilian flight.
Hope: the protagonist is getting to go into space.
Fear: the “commander” is a misogynist and racist and clearly doesn’t like the protagonist.
Hope: protagonist finds a friend among the crew – Matt the 18-year-old trust-fund kid.
Fear: the washed-up actor corners the protagonist and promises to make her time on the ship uncomfortable.
Fear: you wake up on the second day to the blaring system alarm.
• Turning Point: the craft is hit by space junk and the navigation system is damaged.
Act 2:
• New plan: work with NASA to fix the navigation system.
Hope: the com system wasn’t damaged and you can still talk to command.
Fear: the antagonist gets violent when you try to help fix the system.
Hope: the protagonist goes in search of the manual to see if you can find a way to fix the system.
• Plan in action: the antagonist refuses to let anyone help while he fumbles with trying to fix the navigation system.
Fear: the antagonist has shorted out the comm system and the ship can no longer speak with command.
• Midpoint Turning Point: he short circuits the communication system, leaving them unable to communicate with NASA.
Act 3:
• Rethink everything: Constance finds the manual and realizes she designed the navigation system!
Hope: the protagonist flips through the manual and discovers she designed the navigation system.
Fear: they only have 30 minutes until the space junk is on them again.
Hope: the protagonist fixes the system and manages to get in contact with command.
Fear: command informs them there is something wrong with the heat shield.
Hope: the protagonist thinks that she can figure out a way to protect them during re-entry.
Fear: they only have 15 minutes to figure things out.
• New plan: try and convince the others to let her fix the system.
• Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: she fixes the navigation and communication systems, only to find out the heat shield was damaged.
Act 4:
• Final plan: find a way to fix the heat shield.
Hope: working together they come up with a plan that might protect them from burning up during re-entry.
Fear: it’s do or die time. They have to start to navigate back into the earth’s atmosphere.
Hope: she gets to tell her daughters she loves them.
Fear: They start their descent into earth’s atmosphere just as the line of space junk passes over them.
Hope: They make it through alive!
• Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Constance goes outside the ship and finds a way to repair the heat shield. They cross their fingers that they hold during re-entry.
• Resolution: They make it back home safely.
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Matthew Frendo’s Writes Great Hope/Fear!
What I learned doing this assignment was how to create an emotional journey for the audience. And I learned how to do it during the outline phase.
Act 1:
• Opening – Nikki fights some guys off of a beaten girl. She takes her to the hospital, finding a flyer for test subjects that pays good money. Antagonist kills old leader of gang, saying he’s making it too weak and it won’t work for their future plans.
• Inciting Incident – Nikki goes to be a test subject, needing the money, to take the girl’s place.
• Turning Point – 3 Testing subjects find out they are trapped in the building and are there to be hunted as part of a gang initiation while the gang leaders watch from the basement. Antagonist brings initiates there and explains the rules to join their gang.
HOPE: Get money from easy experiment.
DEATH: Butcher kills old gang leader brutally
HOPE: Gets there with others who have same flier.
UNPREDICTABILITY: Place is a condemned building in an abandoned neighborhood set to be demolished.
HOPE: There’s food and drink for them.
INCREASING TENSION: They all pass out after eating/drinking.
HOPE: When they wake up, one of them talks about how this is probably the experiment.
ENVIRONMENT: Gang locks door to condemned building…with them inside.
HOPE: TV set comes on to explain experiment…
DANGER: …and they find out they will be hunted to the death.
Act 2:
• New plan Escape from the building before getting killed.
• Plan in action Nikki calls for police…but the antagonist is a cop. Junkie hides. Tries to climb down fire escape…and it breaks on her. Tries to go downstairs…and gets shot at. Other guy tries to reason with them with sympathy… and they kill him.
• Midpoint Turning Point Nikki jumps over to the next building…but then sees they are going to kill the addict. She hears what her husband told her and looks around at her life. Then she decides to save them and jumps back over.
HOPE: Nikki runs downstairs to leave…
DANGER: …and is shot at by an automatic weapon.
HOPE: Nikki fights thug…
INCOMPATABILITY: …and has a panic attack, accidentally kicking him out of the building to the ground.
HOPE: Nikki goes to an open window and yells for police. She finally throws a bottle and hits their car.
UNPREDICTABILITY: Cops come…and the Butcher talks them away because he is a cop!
HOPE: Nikki tries fire escape…
ENVIRONMENT: …and it ends up falling, causing her to almost fall to her death.
HOPE: Nikki sees other addict get cornered and beg for his life. It looks like thug won’t do it…
DANGER: …then the thug kills him.
Act 3:
• Rethink everything Now is working to find ways to fight back and save the addict too.
• New plan Starts making explosives, kills one for a gun, kills another and taunts bad guys, takes out their cameras. Bad guys are nervous but can’t leave. Butcher sends his main hitman to get her, while calling off cops.
• Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift Gang gets to them and they battle. Nikki hurt near death before she kills another. Find out addict was medic who gets her better.
HOPE: Nikki comes in and saves the addict before they find him.
ENVIRONMENT: …floor gives out underneath them, and they land right next to an initiate.
HOPE: Nikki fights and kills addict, first win since her situation.
UNPREDICTABILITY: Gang sees her fight on monitors and knows she isn’t the one they gave the flyer too…and that she’s dangerous.
HOPE: Nikki taunts them on monitors after realizing they can see her.
INCREASING TENSION: Gang brings out bigger guns, Butcher sends brother to get her.
HOPE: Nikki and addict kidnap brother…
INCREASING TENSION: Find out key (only way out in time) is in addict’s stomach after he at meal in beginning.
HOPE: Nikki makes explosive to get them…
DANGER: bomb explodes on accident, killing 2 initiates but hurting Nikki.
Act 4:
• Final plan They kidnap antagonist’s brother to find out how to get out, and to get leverage, and find out key is in addict’s stomach. They are going to trade him for their lives, when he tries to run and Nikki kills him. And they did it while the antagonist was watching. He chases them.
• Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Nikki fights antagonist, who wants to hurt her for killing his brother, Addict sacrifices himself for Nikki, who kills antagonist in brutal way.
• Resolution Nikki leaves, and sees girl she saved waiting for experiment. Nikki starts to collapse, until the girl helps her up and helps her walk on.
HOPE: Nikki plans to trade brother for their lives…
UNPREDICTABILITY: Addict brother tries to take them on so she kills him…and the Butcher was watching.
HOPE: Nikki takes out their camera system…
DANGER: Butcher sends main hitman after her
HOPE: They now wait for key…
INCREASING TENSION: …except condemned building is set to be demolished in 20 minutes.
HOPE: Nikki kills hitman, about to escape…
DANGER: …except the Butcher is there and shoots her in the shoulder.
HOPE: Addict jumps in front of bullet, saving Nikki…
DANGER: …now Nikki has to fight the Butcher for her life and get out before building is destroyed.
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Matthew Frendo’s Budget
What I learned doing this assignment was how to deal with budget concerns. I learned how to both decrease and increase the budget if needs be.
LOWERING COST
MAIN VARIABLES
• Number of Locations
• Expensive locations
• Number of characters
• Special effects – take out or reduce some action scenes
• Number of pages
• Crowd scenes
• Stunts, Chase scenes, and Fight scenes – Reduce or change some stunts and fight scenes
• Special sets
SECONDARY VARIABLES
• Rights to music, brands, books, etc.
• Explosions and Firearm – Take out explosion and reduce guns
• Kids — shorter work days, tutor on the set
• Animals – need a wrangler, more time to shoot, Humane Society
• Weather — Rain, snow, wind, tornados.
• Water and underwater scenes
• Night scenes
• Helicopters, aircraft, drone shots
• Green screen work
• Extensive Make-up
• Archival Footage
• Anything else dangerous that increases preparation time and/or Insurance. – Less dangerous stunts
RAISING COST
MAIN VARIABLES
• Number of Locations
• Expensive locations – make it a new instead of condemned building
• Number of characters – add in more bad guys
• Special effects – add in more extreme effects
• Number of pages
• Crowd scenes
• Stunts, Chase scenes, and Fight scenes – up the stunts to another level
• Special sets
SECONDARY VARIABLES
• Rights to music, brands, books, etc.
• Explosions and Firearm – add more explosions
• Kids — shorter work days, tutor on the set
• Animals – need a wrangler, more time to shoot, Humane Society
• Weather — Rain, snow, wind, tornados. – add heavy rain to atmosphere
• Water and underwater scenes
• Night scenes
• Helicopters, aircraft, drone shots
• Green screen work
• Extensive Make-up
• Archival Footage
• Anything else dangerous that increases preparation time and/or Insurance.
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Russ writes great Hope & fear
What I learned doing this assignment is I think this story has potential.
ACT ONE
HOPE: Chase had made a good purchase of the house for a fresh start for his family.
FEAR: He is alone in the house. He has no transportation, they are a one-car family. His wife & kid are held up in Chicago.
FEAR: What’s in the ominous shed? Are there things moving in the forest bordering the property?
HOPE: Chase seems eager to refurbish the house. He’s not depressed being alone. He’s inspired.
FEAR: The first random item of clothes turns up on the stump in the backyard.
HOPE: Chase meets kindly neighbor(s) in Mr/Mrs Dickens. Welcome to the “neighborhood”, such as it is, rather remote. But it’s a close-knit community.
FEAR: The previous owner of the house is a story no one wants to tell.
HOPE: Strange things happening on the property, like left-behind clothes, are probably nothing more than town teenagers who head out to the country to party. Nothing to worry about.
FEAR: The next item to show up randomly on the stump comes blood-soaked.
ACT TWO
HOPE: Chase sets up a security camera to watch the stump at night.
FEAR: The camera ‘malfunctions’ at the precise moment the next item appears on the stump, leaving the phenomenon a mystery.
FEAR: Chase becomes more obsessed. Behavior stranger. Won’t call the authorities.
HOPE: Mr/Mrs Dickens checks in on him.
FEAR: When pressed, Dickens reveals that the old owner of the property, Godwyn, was a suspected murderer who hung himself in the tree before it was cut down to this stump.
HOPE: Chase plans to sit up all night and watch the stump himself.
FEAR: The woods at night are terrifying. Things seem to be moving around in the forest and hunting other unseen things. Howls and screeches. Movements that don’t seem natural. Chase retreats inside before anything appears on the stump.
HOPE: Nothing follows him inside. Maybe if he ignores it, there is no real danger.
FEAR: Cannot get ahold of his wife & kid back in Chicago. They are supposed to be on their way by now.
FEAR: The next morning brings a new gore-coated item, and it just might be something belonging to Chase’s wife.
ACT THREE
HOPE: Chase reaches someone else, a family friend, who assures him that everything is alright with his family.
HOPE: Dickens has a stump grinder and is happy to come to get rid of the stump if Chase wants.
FEAR: Chase has worsening nightmares about ghoulish things that might be demons or monstrous alien beings. He is coming unglued.
HOPE: Chase invites Dickens to come to destroy the stump with the grinder.
FEAR: When ground, the stump erupts in blood & gore.
FEAR: The next day, the stump returns unblemished.
ACT FOUR
HOPE: Chase tries to arrange transportation away from the house.
FEAR: Despite his persistent check-ins, no transport arrives.
FEAR: Night falls. The things in the woods are active as ever.
HOPE & FEAR: Chase arms himself and goes off to confront whatever is out there.
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Diana Writes Great Hope/Fear!
What I learned: Adding hope/fear ups the dramatic tension and elevates the quality of the writing.
Act 1:
Opening: Hope: Best friend of Protagonist driving.
Happy. Heads home in middle of day to relax. Fear: Her husband is in bed
with her best friend. Hope: Antagonist gets a phone call, asking if she
can come back to work. Fear: Antagonist refuses. Hope: Husband and friend
are finishing up. Maybe they will finish before the wife gets home. Trapped/Fear:
Wife arrives as they are putting on their shoes. Fear: Will husband be
able to make the bed before wife comes up the stairs? Fear: Will she find
her friend in the closet? Fear: Friend knows it’s her, because of the car
and purse on the counter. Hope: Wife gives him second chance if he answers
question truthfully. Husband lies to her about having an affair. Fear:
What’s she going to do now?
Inciting Incident: Fear: Friend goes on cannibal café
or some site like that and schedules a date for her friend to get her out
of the picture.
Turning Point: Hope for friend who set up the date.
Fear for the woman on the date. Fear: Friend agrees to goes on blind date
with cannibal on a yacht, which is taking off at sunset.Act 2:
New plan: (Fear) Woman realizes she is not on a date.
She is dinner! Has to get off the yacht. But how? Fear: Claustrophic.
Locked in small bathroom. Starts hyperventilating.
Plan in action: Hope: Breaks zip-tie. Fear: Can’t
shimmy the lock free. Hope: Finds pen in purse to use as a weapon. Fear: Cannibal
knocks on door. Hope: Stands by door waiting to stab him with the knife.
Fear: Cannibal knocks her down. Hope: She recovers. Fear: He grabs the
pen. Hope she gets it back from hiim. Fear: He grabs her by the hair and
starts pulling her to the galley.
Midpoint Turning Point: Fear: He
zip-ties her to a chair, tighter this time. Hope: There is a struggle. She
might break free. Fear: He gets the upper hand. Hope: Then she gets the
upper hand. Fear: But he drugs her and out she goes.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Act 3:
Hope: Woman wakes up zip-tied her to a chair, tighter
this time. Her date is not there. Fear: Where is he? When’s he coming
back? Hope: She tries to break free. She did it before. Maybe she can do
it again. There is a struggle and she breaks free when the date returns
and she spits on him, causing him to slap her and the chair falls over and
she uses the momentum to break the zip-tie. Fear: He gets the upper hand
and catches her. Hope: Then she gets the upper hand. Etc. Neither wins. They
are equals, which frustrates them, because they are at a Mexican standoff.
Rethink everything: Hope: Woman is a Navy Seal on
leave. Fear: Man is not just a cannibal, he’s a former Army Ranger (dishonorable
discharge). Hope: She gets the upper hand. Fear: He gets the upper hand.
And as they are wrestling on the floor…Hope: The building frustration
results in passionate love-making where woman finds out her friend set her
up.
New plan: Hope: She can’t eat
her date because she has fallen in love with him and vice versa. Hope: When
woman learns she was set up, they plot to kill and eat her friend.
Turning Point: Huge
failure/Major shift: Hope: They try to abduct her conniving friend (Fear):
They fail and then something really bad happens.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Act 4:
Final plan: Cannibal couple anonymously “award” her
former best friend a private chef’s dinner at their home.
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Cannibal
couple arrives at friend’s house.
Resolution: Cannibal couple eat husband and force
friend to eat her husband before she becomes dessert. ENVIRONMENTTrapped /
Prisoner. Trapped on yacht on the high seas with a cannibal.
Claustrophobic.
She is locked in a tiny bathroom and is freaking out because she hates
enclosed spaces. Set that up early in the movie when her friend’s husband
pushes her in the bedroom closet when his wife shows up.
Dangerous. On
date in confined/remote space with a cannibal.
Restricting. Locked
in tiny room. Hands are zip-tied. Can’t breathe.
Not livable. Will
get eaten if she doesn’t figure a way out.
Hiding outINCOMPATABILITY
Forced to deal
with each other: Friend set up on blind date with cannibal.
Opposing needs/desires.
Friend wants to date. Cannibal wants to eat his date.
Mind games.
Friend who set her up on blind date, wants to kill her. She doesn’t know
her friend found out about the affair.
Psychological
issues. Engraged friend attempts to have her friend killed for sleeping
with her husband. Both people on the date are psychopaths/cannibals.
Triggering each
other. They push each other’s buttons. Sexual tension. Opposites?UNPREDICTABILITY
Not sure who or
what the real threat is! Audience learns both people on the date are cannibals.
Person on the
edge! Woman just realized she is dinner.
Could attack at
any moment. Woman in bathroom trying to figure a way out.
Out of control
situation. Two cannibals try to kill each other. Kill or be killed. Eat or
be eaten.ISOLATION
Psychological
Issues
Loss of a companion
Left Alone: Locked
in bathroom.
Helpless: We
think the woman locked in the bathroom is helpless.INCREASING TENSION
Ticking clock:
Has to figure a way out before the sauces are prepared.
Impending doom:
Is going to get eaten.
What’s the worst
that could happen? She is alive while being eaten.
What is this
character afraid of? Being eaten alive
How many things
could go wrong? She could stab her date. He could slash her thigh. The
yacht could crash into something. The friend who tried to have the other
friend killed ultimately gets killed by her bff.DANGER
Threat: Going to
be eaten by cannibal.
Attack. Locked
in bathroom.
Injury. Both get
stabbed. Perhaps other injuries, like a broken arm, cracked ribs, etc.
Destruction. Boat
almost runs into a large ship.
Death. End of
movie friend’s husband is eaten and she is next.0 -
Jay Writes Great Hope/Fear
What I learned from this assignment is that it is a great exercise! I didn’t ID the specific fears but did list as many hopes and fears as I could. Some I left blank as I still need to work on them.
Using the list of Infinite Possibilities above, brainstorm 5 or more Hope/Fear moments that can occur in each Act. Sequence those Hope/Fear moments to fit the emotional journey you want your audience to have.
ACT 1
1. FEAR: Their ship is damaged. Can they not go home?
2. HOPE: Alpha 2 is on the way with supplies, more people, and a ship that could take them home.
3. FEAR: One of the team passes out. Is she going to be OK?
4. HOPE: Eliza’s (protag) mother is going to be OK.
5. FEAR: Her mother has a heart attack and dies.
6. HOPE: Eliza is ovulating.
7. FEAR: It’s against the rules. What would happen to a fetus or baby born on Mars?
8. HOPE:
9. FEAR: A storm comes in – atypical.
10. HOPE: A new message is coming in from Earth. Priority Message Klaxon.
11. FEAR: The storm knocks out the communications array; they only hear part of the message.
12. HOPE: We can fix it.
13. FEAR: We have to go out into the storm to do so.
14. HOPE: Commander gets to comm array and begins to fix it.
15. FEAR: Commander is killed.
16. HOPE: Eliza assumes command. Has a plan.
17. FEAR: A meteorite punctures the Rec Room hab. Waring Klaxon.
18. HOPE: Sebastian fixes leak.
19. FEAR: While attempting to fix array, there is a Mars quake, dead commander’s body falls into crack, and they hear a shriek coming from the crack.
ACT 2
1. FEAR: Four blips are showing on terrestrial radar.
2. HOPE: Sebastian goes out to assist.
3. FEAR: As he’s exiting the airlock door, a meteorite hits him, knocks him out, and drapes him across airlock door. Waring Klaxon.
4. HOPE: Mateo goes out to assist Sebastian.
5. HOPE: They fix the array. (When does the storm pass Mars?)
6. FEAR: Shrieks are getting closer.
7. HOPE: Elisa and Joanna make it back to airlock door.
8. FEAR: The alien monsters appear. Grab Joanna with a frog like tongue and pull her towards them.
9. HOPE: Eliza tries to save Joanna.
10. FEAR: The alien monsters kill Joanna; they return underground with their pray.
11. HOPE: The remaining three safely enter and shut the airlock door. Priority Waring – the Message!
12. FEAR: The message indicates a comet appeared out of nowhere. Headed for earth. Extinction level event.
ACT 3
1. HOPE: Eliza comes up with a plan. Shelter in the Mess Hall. Shut down all non-essential areas, power, and life support.
2. FEAR: Sebastian is hurt. Eliza takes him to Med Bay.
3. HOPE: Sebastian is going to be OK.
4. FEAR: Mateo believes this is the apocalypse. Goes to his room to retrieve a personal item. Doesn’t know what to do. Asks God for a sign. He is given one. He has new purpose. Takes a metal cross with him.
5. HOPE: In the Mess Hall, Mateo has prepared a celebratory feast.
6. FEAR: He’s getting drunk.
7. HOPE: Eliza and Sebastian shut down all non-essentials, including exterior lighting.
8. FEAR: Mateo sneaks to the Med Bay and steals drugs.
9. HOPE:
10. FEAR: Warning Klaxon – Perimeter Breach
11. HOPE: The floodlights! They turn them back on. One alien scurries away.
12. FEAR: Where’s the other? Under the colony. Smashes its legs into the operations deck.
13. HOPE: Get the high-power flashlights!
14. FEAR Another meteor pierces the hab. Warning Klaxon.
15. HOPE: Mateo goes to seal the breach.
16. FEAR: The alien stabs one of its legs into Sebastian’s leg.
17. HOPE: Eliza chops off the alien’s leg. It scurries back out, sees the exterior lights, and departs.
18. FEAR: Sebastian’s leg is skewered.
19. HOPE: Sebastian is going to be OK.
20. FEAR: With the alien handled, Mateo drugs himself (adrenalin). He calls for Eliza to assist him with a repair in the Ops Deck.
21. HOPE: Mateo visits Sebastian in Med Bay. Checks on him.
22. FEAR: Mateo gives Sebastian a drug overdose.
23. HOPE: Mateo joins Erika. He is being romantic.
24. FEAR: Mateo turns. Tells Eliza she is to be the mother of his child. Eliza fights him. He punches her and knocks the wind out of her. Drags her to the table in the Mess Hall. She dies.
25. HOPE: Eliza is with her mother. A flashback? A dream? Heaven? Her mother says she is forgiven for forsaking God. Tells her daughter she has much to do; that faith will lead her. Eliza’s eyes fly open. She’s alive.
ACT 4
1. HOPE: Eliza sneaks into the Med Bay. Checks on Sebastian. He is alive. She has a plan. They go to the Ops Deck to surprise Mateo.
2. FEAR: They all fight.
3. HOPE: Eliza subdues Mateo. She takes him on her terms.
4. FEAR: Mateo gets back up. Claims ownership of Eliza.
5. HOPE: She kills him. Rushes to Sebastian on the Ops Deck. Gets him to the Med Bay. He’s going to be OK.
6. FEAR: Eliza yells, screams out in pain.
7. HOPE: A baby cries.
8. FEAR: A Klaxon blares.
9. HOPE: A message come in – a large number of humans has survived.
10. FEAR: They are on a ship headed to Mars.
11. HOPE: Eliza’s father is on the ship.
0 -
Julie writes great hope/fear!
1. Tell us the following:
Concept:
A Swiss DJ (Hans) plans to make his
fortune selling a new, lethal drug, and he recruits teen girls to manufacture
it.
Main
Conflict: Anna, DJ’s daughter, who is
desperate to escape his brutality, and his cult of teen girls.2. Fill in each of these with the answers you have right now.
Act 1:
Opening: DJ holds an illegal rave inside Swiss
mountain bunker. Hope that it is an innocent party of teens having fun.
Fear that DJ is bad guy who forces his daughter Anna to sell drugs to the
party-goers.
Inciting
Incident: Jim, undercover, international
DEA agent, tries to arrest DJ for selling drugs to teens. Hope that DJ
will get caught. Fear that he’ll get away and his daughter Anna will get
caught instead.
Turning
Point: DJ escapes. Fear that Anna will sell new drug to Jim, and he’ll
take it. Hope that Anna and Jim are attracted to each other and enjoy wandering
together. Fear that while flirting, they will get lost in the labyrinth of
the bunker. Hope as she leads him deep into the bunker to find a private
place to make love. Fear that they will be discovered by her father. Hope
that they can find their way out of the maze of the bunker.Act 2:
New
plan: To search for way out of Bunker. Hope that they succeed. Fear that
they will run into DJ.
Plan
in action: Fear when DJ follows them, terrifying them.
Midpoint
Turning Point: Jim reacts to the drug.
Hope that Anna has an antidote that works. Fear that Jim will die
from overdose. Hope that Jim will live. Fear that antidote won’t work.
Hope when it works.Act 3:
Rethink
everything: They confess their true
identities to each other. Hope that
the truth will save the day. Fear when
DJ overhears and confronts them. Hope when DJ runs away and they follow
him, hoping to catch him. Fear when he loses them, and they get even more lost.
New
plan: Hope when they hear noise and
decide to follow the noise, thinking that it’s the DJ. Fear of actually
finding him.
Turning
Point: Huge failure / Major shift: Fear
when they get more and more lost. Hope when they stumble upon a group of teen
girls. Fear when they see they’re manufacturing drugs.Act 4:
Final
plan: Hope to convince teens to
stop making drugs and lead them out of the bunker. Fear when they realize
the teens are drugged and brainwashed by DJ. Hope that they can convince
teens to leave. Fear when teens come after them with hypodermic needles.
Climax/Ultimate
expression of the conflict: Fear when DJ arrives. Hope when he tells teens
to stop. Fear when enraged daughter confronts him. He’s furious. They
battle physically. Hope that she will win using her karate skills. Fear
that he will overwhelm her. Hope when
Jim pulls a gun. Fear when DJ knocks it out of his hand. Fear when DJ orders the teens to help
him. Hope when Anna commands them
to help her, thereby freeing themselves. Fear when they seem loyal to DJ
and hesitate. Hope when girls go into action and surround DJ, and Anna
hits him on the head with a rock.
When he moans, fear that he’ll come to. Hope when Anna injects him with his own
strong drug. Fear that they can’t find way out. Hope when Anna says she
dropped luminescent beads that they can follow out. Hope that she and Jim
will get together when she confesses that she did that because she wanted
to spend more time with Jim.
Resolution: Hope that Drug manufacturing operation
ends. Hope that Teens and Anna are free. Hope that Jim has fulfilled his
mission. Hope as Jim and Anna look for the luminescent beads. Fear when they don’t see any. Hope when Anna finally finds the path of
luminescence and they begin the walk to the mouth of the bunker.5. Post your assignment in the forums at https://www.screenwritingclasses.com/forums/
0 -
<div>Bevo Beaven writes Great Hope/Fear</div>
What I learned from this assignment: having the specific details to identify and place in the story – all the hope/fear moments – this is a truly effective way to enhance a story/script – again, the story kind of further wrote itself in the process of doing this assignment.
TITLE: BULLFROG
HIGH CONCEPT:
CONCEPT: Beth wakes up in an 18-wheeler driving across the Utah desert at night, middle of nowhere, discovers she’s the guest passenger of a trucker named Marv. She has no idea how she got there, why she’s there, or how she’s going to get home.
CONFLICT: frustration begins at “FADE IN” as she asks Marv questions to try to figure out answers to this disturbing riddle, did he save her or kidnap her? As they drive, she begins testing him.
REASON FOR CONTAINMENT: middle of nowhere, 1:00 a.m. in the Utah desert, two lane road – no one is anywhere – she’s stuck in Marv’s truck with him on a deserted road—destination Bullfrog, Utah; she’s all alone but for the truck driver Marv.
CHARACTERS:
· BETH: 35, persuasive, smart and successful tech industry electronic sales engineer, supposed to be in New Hampshire today to meet her new boss: Chris, SVP of Sales for her new job at a new company in Manchester, NH.
· CHRIS: 30, he and Beth only speak on the phone, and only when cell service is present. But Chris is also a go-getter racing to the top. He’s pissed at her that she’s going to be absent her first day.
· MARV: Beth’s iconic trucker/rescuer, 50-55, he’s consumed plenty of diner food for 30 years of trucking, always smiling, just here to help, but won’t give her a straight answer. He tells her what happened, but she is suspect of his story. Marv’s trailer is full of boxed electronics from Beth’s new company.
· TRAVIS: 37, hot-tempered, trim, built and handsome, but a total male chauvinist whose comments and views frequently verge him into the misogynist lane, ironic because all he can think about is having sex with women and Beth is his current target. He is Beth’s replacement truck driver and she’s stuck alone with him after Marv’s truck explodes. Travis is the antagonist. He knows plenty but hides it all from Beth until she outwits him and gets him to spill the truth. His trailer is a milk tanker.
· LEAH: 38, Travis’s wife since high school, she’s captive inside the milk tanker trailer.
THE INFINITE HOPE/FEAR POSSIBILITIES
ACT I
<img width=”275″ height=”790″ src=”file:///C:/Users/Owner/AppData/Local/Temp/msohtmlclip1/01/clip_image001.png” align=”left” hspace=”12″ vspace=”5″ alt=”Text Box: TYPES OF FEAR
ENVIRONMENT
• TRAPPED/PRISONER
• CLAUSTROPHIC
• DANGEROUS
• RESTRICTING
• NOT LIVABLE
• HIDING OUT
INCOMPATABILITY
• FORCED TO DEAL WITH EACH OTHER
• OPPOSING DESIRES/NEEDS
• MIND GAMES
• PHYCH ISSUES
• TRIGGERING EACH OTHER
UNPREDICTABILITY
• NOT SURE WHO/WHAT THE REAL THREAT IS
• PERSON ON THE EDGE
• COULD ATTACK AT ANY MOMENT
• OUT OF CONTROL SITUATION
ISOLATION
• PSYCH ISSUES
• LOSS OF A COMPANION
• LEFT ALONE
• HELPLESS
INCREASING TENSION
• TICKING CLOCK
• IMPENDING DOOM
• WHAT’S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN?
• WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER AFRAID OF?
• HOW MANY THINGS COULD GO WRONG?
DANGER
• THREAT
• ATTACK
• INJURY
• DESTRUCTION
• DEATH” v:shapes=”Text_x0020_Box_x0020_2″>TRAPPED/PRISONER: BETH wakes up suddenly to find herself riding as a passenger across the Utah desert in an 18-wheeler. She’s not supposed to be here, she should be in New England meeting her new boss and training in New Hampshire. How did she get here, why, how get back home?
UNPREDICTABILITY/NOT SURE WHO/WHAT THE REAL THREAT IS: Beth is all alone with this male stranger. She is wounded (slightly); how serious is it/she believes she should see a hospital. Who is he? What does he want? Where is he taking her? Who caused that wound? Was it this guy driving the truck?
HOPE: When she awakens MARV is trucking along with country music on, smiling, speaking about growing different varieties of strawberries on the CB radio with some other trucker. He appears harmless and friendly and kind. He explains to Beth why she’s there – he picked her up from the roadside on this dark two-lane in Utah with no town for miles, where her car had crashed – says he rescued her from a guy with a knife who cut her abdomen. She sees she is bleeding slightly. Okay this guy is helping me. He is taking her to Bullfrog, the nearest urgent care or hospital to where they are, they will treat her wound, about a two-hour ride in an 18-wheeler.
TRAPPED/ALONE: she asks Marv if she can use his cell phone to call her boss. He says “sure, but there’s no service till we get to the Shiloh Truck Stop in 40 miles” – she’s captive in this guy’s truck for another 40 miles.
HOPE: after Marv talks about his family, she’s feeling better, she spots a professional photo of a handsome young man about 19 on the dashboard. Beth: “is that your son?” Marv: “oh, no, no, no ma’am. That’s our, well. You might call him our leader.”
UNPREDICTABILITY/HOW MANY THINGS COULD GO WRONG/NOT SURE WHAT THE THREAT IS: Beth: what do you mean your leader? Marv gets a call on the CB. “Yep, we’re headed to Shiloh, Romeo, but you mind your manners, I got a real nice lady passenger with me.”
IMPENDING DOOM: Oh f—, who is this guy he’s talking to and what are they setting up, God!
HOPE: Marv stops at a tiny truck stop called “Shiloh” to go to the bathroom.
IMPENDING DOOM: Beth: wait I know that name – Marv: yep, bloodiest 2-day battle in the Civil War – 23,000 dead and wounded. Beth asks what’s in your trailer. Marv: “illegal aliens, what else.” Then laughs. “You know I’m here to help with you, right?” Then he leaves Beth in the cab to make her phone call. She calls CHRIS back in New Hampshire, her boss. He balls her out for skipping her first day on the new job. At the end of their call there’s a silence and Chris says, “You know I’m here to help with you, right?” She finds what looks like a micro-sized push button electronic thing, a transmitter, beside Marv’s seat.
WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN: She takes it—she’s now planning to escape. Beth finds a sledge hammer near the hitch and breaks the lock on Marv’s trailer’s back door, throws open the doors – packed full of boxes of electronics with her new company’s logo. Her abdominal wound hurts, pulls her shirt up, it’s oozing, there’s a small wire poking out. She excruciatingly pulls the wire and pulls out a little metal cube, no idea what it is. WTF! Who put that there? She tosses it into the trailer and shuts the doors.
HOW MANY THINGS COULD GO WRONG: Beth figures she’s got to get the hell out of Marv’s truck, out of his captivity, and just then another truck pulls in to the tiny fueling area. It’s hauling a milk tanker. She sees the driver turn on the fuel to pump and walk inside the tiny truck stop. Carrying the sledge hammer with her, Beth quickly runs over to that truck, stuffs the sledge hammer in a spot on the trailer, climbs up into the cab and hides in the sleeper cab area behind the driver seat.
HOPE: this trucker must be less of a threat than Marv.
ISOLATION/TICKING CLOCK: she’s alone hiding, waiting for the driver to return. Time goes by, she uncovers from hiding and starts searching inside the cab. Seems pretty normal, pack of cigarettes, logbook. She finds some Oui Magazine copies and other naked women magazines, a worn copy of The Joy of Sex. Then she hears the diesel pump click off – truck tank is full. Then the driver exits the tiny building with Marv and the both yell “Fuck Off!” to each other.
TRAPPED/PRISONER/IMPENDING DOOM: no time to escape Beth quickly hides back in the bed area.
The driver-Travis- gets in the cab. Starts it and mutters to himself what an asshole Marv is. Travis gets on the CB and calls Marv some more names.
THREAT/UNPREDICTABILITY/COULD ATTACK AT ANY MOMENT/IMPENDING DOOM: Marv says the girl is gone. Travis: “Well there you go you stupid shit, you shoulda kept her with you. You gotta find her. One of us has to bring her to Bullfrog.”
HOPE: Beth is pissed. She decides she’s going to take the bull by the horns. Beth to Travis: “What do you mean ‘one of us has to bring her to Bullfrog’?” Travis is taken aback when she reveals herself. He turns on the Travis charm. He’s at first very charming in a bad boy naughty male way. Marv comes over the CB: “Aren’t you gonna help me look for her?”
NOT SURE WHO/WHAT THE REAL THREAT IS: Travis: “you lost her, you find her.” Tells Beth as he pulls out of the truck stop, “We gotta get you outa here.” Over the CB Marv calls Travis a f—ing homo. Beth shows Travis the button transmitter: I found this thing in his truck, what does it do? Travis says, “Hell, I don’t know. Push it and find out.” She looks at him for a beat then pushes the button.
OUT OF CONTROL SITUATION, HOW MANY THINGS COULD GO WRONG, DESTRUCTION: Marv and his truck are instantly vaporized into burning hulk of molten metal under a mushroom cloud. Beth is horrified. Travis mutters quietly: “problem solved.” Travis says, After what you just did, if the authorities find you, you’ll be locked up the rest of your life. You’d better stick with me.
HOPE: Travis says, “I’ll take care of you the rest of the way to Bullfrog. We need to get you to a hospital so a professional can treat that wound of yours. I’m just here to help with you. Besides, I ain’t bad company.”
FORCED TO DEAL WITH EACH OTHER, THREAT, UNPREDICTABLE: Beth is scared, more confused than ever. As the miles progress Travis moves out of charming into chauvinist and finally blatant sex references. Beth decides she’s got to step it up or who knows what will happen to her.
ACT II
HOPE: New plan – As they drive, negotiating the difficult two-lane, windy climbing turns, inclines, descents, Beth engages with Travis; she’s scheming, trying for information.
COULD ATTACK AT ANY MOMENT: he’s just focused on sex, talking about it, eyeing her, she gets angrier—has to control it—with every stupid male chauvinist comment he makes.
HOPE: but she is determined, keeps digging, she’s trying to find his one really hot button so she can intentionally make him angry so he’ll slip and give her answers. Obviously it’s sex; she decides she’s going to try to lead him on.
HOW MANY THINGS COULD GO WRONG: a man calls on the CB: Hey Hard-On what’s your 20? I can’t get a response from Marv. Travis: his radio’s broke. Chris on the CB: have you seen that bitch anywhere. Travis: you betcha – I got her with me right here. She’s resting in the sleeper. Chris: Listen carefully, Hard-On — sell don’t mess her up. She’s the star of the show, right? Travis: you got it boss.
Midpoint Turning Point – She comes out from the sleeper cab with his copy of The Joy of Sex.
MIND GAMES: Beth says: “I like trying new things, mix it up. Don’t you have anything more exciting than this?” He gets really excited, starts almost drooling. He reaches under the seat and hands her a copy of the Kama Sutra. She starts looking through the pages.
NOT SURE WHO/WHAT THE THREAT IS: There’s a copy of the exact same headshot of the same 19-year-old young man Marv had; it’s placed inside the book pages. Beth – what the hell. Beth decides to push a button of his. BETH: “Who’s this? Is he your lover?”
PERSON ON THE EDGE, COULD ATTACK AT ANY MOMENT/ATTACK: Travis explodes: I ain’t no f—ing queer, you liberal big city piece of shit. etc. He calls her terrible names, he suddenly strikes her in the face; she at first recoils, he enjoyed hitting her, he calls her more names, slaps her again – still angry. Beth slowly and softly takes his hand. Travis what’s really going on here? Why am I in Utah with you? How did you know I have a wound? I never told you that. TRAVIS: “Don’t ever call me a queer again. And don’t you ever, ever, ever blaspheme the Leader… never.”
HOPE: He finally calms down. Stares at her holding his hand.
THREAT, IMPENDING DOOM: He says: Look when we get down this hill, I’m gonna pull the truck over and you and me, we’re gonna have sex together. You pick a position from that book that you like. If you do that, if you have sex with me without a fight… then I’ll tell you what’s going on. Beth: “you have to tell me something first, something I need to know, then I’ll think about having sex with you, and if what you tell me is good enough, I’ll do something to you, something so naughty, something I know how to do to a man that’ll give you a whole new reason to wake up in the morning.
HOW MANY THINGS COULD GO WRONG: He looks at her with a dead serious, calmness: “He selected you.”
Act III
IMPENDING DOOM/ATTACK: Beth has to rethink everything – Travis suddenly pulls off the road to collect on her end of the bargain to have sex with Beth. She insists on having it outdoors—in the middle of the two-lane road. He tries to rip her shirt off – Beth: no big boy, you first. Take all your clothes off, lie down in the road and close your eyes. He rips off all his clothes, does exactly what she says, she throws her shirt on him. He gets excited, reaches for her, she comes at him out of the shadows with a large rock, he sees her, gets partway up, tries to attack her, but she hits him in the head with the rock and he goes down hard. His head is injured, bleeds. He’s not moving at all. She pulls back an eyelid – eyes are rolled back. She thinks he dead, that she’s killed him. Beth: “shit, I didn’t want you dead.” Tries to find a pulse but she’s too nervous, can’t find one.
HOPE: New plan – Beth figures she’ll bring Travis’s dead body to Bullfrog and explain it to the police. She’ll have to drive the milk tanker truck herself.
HOPE: the threat posed by Travis is behind her now. Turning Point: Major shift – she begins to pull his body out of the road to the side. She gets him out of the road and starts trying to drag Travis to the passenger side door, she’s trying to figure out how she will lift Travis’ body into the cab.
WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG: Just then she hears a faint voice that says “help me” coming from nearby. Again, “can you help me” – a soft woman’s voice coming from the tanker trailer. Beth leaves Travis’ body and climbs up on the top of the tanker, opens the hatch. A young woman is in there – in the tank that’s half full of milk. It’s Leah, Travis’s wife.
ATTACK/INJURY: While Beth leans over to get a better look, she reaches down for her but she’s too high up. She sees her in there, kind of treading water in the milk. Travis climbs quietly up behind Beth and pushes Beth in. She splashes into the half full milk tank. Travis: “f—ing bitch!” “Both of you are f—ing bitches.” Locks down the hatch. It’s pitch black inside.
ACT IV
IMPENDING DOOM/TICKING CLOCK: Final plan – Beth talks to Leah, find’s out Travis put her in the tank – Beth: why? Leah: Because he’s crazy. That’s all I know.
HOPE: Leah has made up her mind after 19 years of marriage she is going to kill him if she can get out of the tank in time.
IMPENDING DOOM: Beth: What do you mean – ‘in time’? Leah: he’s going to stop at the Millar Farm just before Bullfrog and fill up the tank. Beth: he just filled up at Shiloh. No, it’s a dairy. Leah: did you feel that? Beth: what? Something in here with us? Something just brushed up in the area between my legs.
They talk—Leah and Beth agree his weakness is sex. Tells Beth about their romance in high school. “He was always kinda different, but he was, you know, charming and handsome. All the girls wanted him.” Beth: Do you have kids? Leah: Four miscarriages later, we stopped tryin’.
Leah: what about you? You got kids? Nope. I am unable to have kids. Beth reveals her past, says she had her share of flings, no marriages, but I did get pregnant once; I gave it up for adoption. Saddest day of my life. I was only 16. I was scared. And the fuckin’ guy who did it? I never saw him again. He was weird. That birth was why I can’t have kids at all. It was messed up from the start. Almost aborted the baby, doctor’s orders. But I didn’t. Carried him through, I almost died 3 times: on the way to the hospital, in the birthing room and afterward.
Beth tries to talk her out of killing Travis, because she needs to find out what he meant by ‘He selected you’ – for what? And who? Leah has no clue: like I told you… he’s crazy.
IMPENDING DOOM: He pulls onto a dirt road that makes it is extra splashy and bouncy inside the tank, up to the Millar dairy and loads the tank with milk. As he fills it and the milk level gets deeper and deeper, they both flounder around more in the tank. Treading water in an almost full tank of milk gets hard. Beth asks what is another of his weaknesses—a big one. Leah says it’s private. Beth says, you know men like Travis, that act like him, a lot of times all that macho I’ll fuck you right now bullshit is just a cover up. For latent homosexuality. Leah: you’re saying I married a queer. Beth: I wouldn’t put it like that. Leah: naw, he’s not a fag. Beth: okay well tell me why he carries a photo of a handsome young man around with him. Have you seen it? Leah: yeah, they all have one. We’ve got a great big framed one in the livin’ room. Beth: who is he? Leah: it’s like he’s their savior. all the men that come over they all carry one. They kind of worship him. Even Chris.
IMPENDING DOOM
Beth: Chris? Leah – from the main office back east. When they have their little ceremonies, Chris is there on the computer. Beth: what does Chris look like? Leah describes Beth’s boss, the VP of international sales in Manchester, NH. Well, fuck. That’s my new boss. Shit. What has Travis gotten us into? What about you? you’re not into it at all, huh? Is it a cult, devil worship, what the hell are they doing? All I know is Travis told me he’s supposed to deliver someone very special to him. Where is this guy? Leah: he’s in Bullfrog. Well I kind of fucked up Travis’ plan, didn’t I.
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Travis pulls the truck over as they crest a hill and see Bullfrog just a few miles away. Now he wants to tell Beth what’s going down. He wants to control her thoughts, her fears, get the best of her. He gets Leah out, then Beth.
IMPENDING DOOM
Travis: I know who you are. I know who you gave birth to. He’s gonna change the world. He’ll change the world in spite of you, you goddam bitch. We all will. Beth: what the fuck are you talking about?
Travis: I’m talking about life after extinction. We have you to thank, Beth. You gave him life. He’s the first one who lived past six months, a year, Beth. He’s your flesh and blood and he’s gonna change your world. Travis tells her, that her son is a hybrid. He pulls out one of the photos. Yeah, him, Beth. He’s your flesh and blood. He’s leading a new species to take over this planet, Beth. We’re going to impregnate all human females of childbearing age and give birth to a totally new species of hybrid humans.
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Heather Esancy – Infinite Possibilities
In this assignment, I learned that in the last lesson, I deviated way too far away from the containment concept. I brainstormed TOO much! I have edited to drill down on 2 locations (apartment and car) to maintain the psychological aspect of the story.
Act 1:
FEAR/ANXIETY: Clara is a new widow facing quarantine alone. We hear the news headlines “China Virus” on TV in the background.
WARNING: We learn Clara’s neighbor in her apartment building is a young, Asian single mom who is an ER nurse. We see the apartment’s doors are very close together.
HOPE: The neighbor is gracious and dismisses Clara’s racist mumblings.
<font face=”inherit”>FEAR: Clara is spastic trying to </font>sanitize<font face=”inherit”> groceries she just carried inside.</font>
HOPE: We learn Clara is a talented artist who has a home full of landscape art.
Act 2:
Warning: Clara takes measures for her own safety inside her apartment. She struggles with basic household tasks. Autonomy is new to her.
FEAR: Clara realizes the crack in her wall and the air ducts might be a breach of her neighbors germs getting into her apartment.
Turning Point: Clara rations food and medicine and begins to decline.
HOPE/ New Plan: Michelle (Clara’s daughter) leaves voicemails that she is having groceries delivered and will be making the 6 hour drive to check on her very soon.
Act 3:
We understand that 2 weeks have passed.
Turning Point: Clara is ultra focused and almost manic, painting incredible, vivid scenes that look nothing at all like her previous works.
HOPE: She enjoys the painting and it takes her mind off the news and fear.
Warning: We see an erratically written NOTE on her refrigerator. It is a crinkly, spiral sheet. We can only read “MAN BLUE SHIRT”
As the day turns into night, Clara finally responds to Michelle in an exchange of concerning text messages.
Warning: She has had an emotional shift.
FEAR: The lights flicker in her apartment. Her computer and printer make noises as they reboot. She thinks “they” have hacked her computer and have all her bank access.
HOPE: Michelle and art teacher, Ruby are getting closer to Clara’s house.
Turning Point: Clara flees her home with a dry cleaner bag over her head for protection. She is intent on getting to the bank to withdraw all her money. She believes covid has infiltrated her apartment and she will die soon.
Act 4:
DANGER: Michelle and Ruby arrive. Clara’s apartment is empty. It is riddled with cleaning fluids, gloves and papers, a sterile hoarder’s mess. Many bizarre paintings are strewn about, some are still wet.
HOPE: Ruby marvels with shock and confusion at the abstract work Clara has done but excited to see such interesting work and wants it for her gallery. She deems the art a “graduation of emotion”.
Turning Point: Through scattered documents, we learn Clara received an inheritance.
FEAR: Michelle is frozen reading THE NOTE – we see Clara has written a description of a man in a blue shirt and a silver laptop who she thinks has been watching her make copies of her personal documents on the library copy machine.
Out of control: Clara drives absently, as if she is no longer in her body, taking no heed for red lights. Many near misses, and 911 calls to report her, yet she goes undetected like a bandit.
DANGER: We see Clara left her phone, purse and jacket behind.
DANGER: We see her car at a lakefront, a light shines and we do not see a head in the driver’s seat.
HOPE: Michelle and Ruby are at police station, making a missing person report.
HOPE: At dawn, an old truck with a man pulls up. He is going fishing. He sees Clara’s car is running. The windows are fogged, he suspects it is teenagers “sucking face”. Clara swipes the fog off the window as the fisherman walks away.
DANGER: Police reporting mix ups occur.
Final Plan: The fisherman returns the next day at dawn. In the distance, he sees Clara’s car in the same spot. The vehicle appears to be off. As he gets closer, he sees a ghastly face of a woman in the passenger side. She can barely hold her head up, but shows the fisherman a note with a phone number through the glass.
Blue and red lights approach the lakefront.
Resolution with Ambiguity: Clara is laying down in the back seat. We only see her arm and waist. <font face=”inherit”>CLOSE ON: a tiny bare arm with a dry cleaner bag for a blanket, </font>juxtaposition<font face=”inherit”> on a raw and rainy morning, March 26th, 2020.</font>
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Linda Writes Great Hope/Fear!
I learned how much deeper this exercise can help me make the emotional journey of my characters.
Act 1:
HOPE: Tanji hopes he can finish the task of contacting families of 20 fallen soldiers.
FEAR: He’s watched Mortuary soldiers breaking down with nightmares and what could be permanent PTSD from doing this job.
HOPE: Major Sloan hopes the base looks deserted enough not to attract more bomb attacks.
FEAR: Insurgents could find out a few remained behind on the base and attack and/or IEDs could be hidden in the ruble.
HOPE: Adiba needs to keep working for the Americans to stay connected and get Major Sloan to complete her request for emigration.
FEAR: Adiba’s brother Baqir may come looking for her and do something crazy.
HOPE: Mario will keep Tanji and him safe during this one week they have to stay on the base.
FEAR: With no other backup, they are vulnerable for an attack that could kill all of them.
HOPE: The families will get some closure for their terrible losses.
FEAR: With only Tanji, Adiba, and Mario searching for the soldiers’ effects, they won’t be able to finish the task.
ACT 2
HOPE: Tanji is turning to his divinity training, his father’s ways of dealing with their congregation’s sufferings, and scriptures to help him with unexpected emotions over all this death and loss.
FEAR: He’s losing his faith in God and can’t reconcile experiences in a war zone with what he’s been taught about mercy and protection.
HOPE: Tanji is falling in love with Adiba and learning from her about spirituality vs. dogma.
FEAR: He can never fulfill his love for Adiba because of the differences between their religions and cultures.
HOPE: Mario wants his best buddy Trey to be safe on the next base where the survivors of Camp Wolf were taken after the bombing.
FEAR: He hasn’t been able to find Trey; he might have been hurt or killed.
HOPE: Adiba is falling in love with Tanji and wants to go to America and be his wife.
FEAR: She’ll be condemned by God and forever estranged from Baqir if she marries an infidel.
HOPE: Major Sloan longs to find solace in belief in a God he feels abandoned by and has rejected.
FEAR: He will never know he’s loved or that there’s any purpose to his life.
ACT 3
HOPE: Tanji sees a way out of facing his failure at chaplaincy by going home when his father has a heart attack.
FEAR: He’s giving up on a dream of finding his own mission in life and proving to himself that he’s not a worthless speck.
HOPE: Major Sloan has enough evidence to make a case to get a chaplain replacement and send Tanji back to the states.
FEAR: He’s broken military regulations by having Mario report to him on Tanji and could have serious repercussions.
HOPE: Mario found an unsent email Trey wrote and hopes it may mean he’s alive.
FEAR: Trey may not be alive.
HOPE: Tanji’s breakdown justifies for Mario that he betrayed him.
FEAR: Mario has made a big mistake and broken military regulations by betraying Tanji.
HOPE: Mario hasn’t found any of Trey’s effects or his helmet.
FEAR: He just hasn’t gone to the right spot yet.
ACT 4
HOPE: Tanji can talk Mario down from killing himself.
FEAR: He won’t succeed at talking Mario down and will also be killed.
HOPE: Major Sloan can command Tanji to back off from going into the chapel rubble to minister to him.
FEAR: Mario will kill himself and all of them.
HOPE: Adiba will be able to tell Tanji she loved him.
FEAR: She’ll never have that chance.
HOPE: Major Sloan will be able to make things right with Tanji and tell him he has helped to restore his faith in God.
FEAR: Tanji will never forgive Mario and him.
HOPE: Mario will get psychiatric help at the next military base.
FEAR: Mario won’t live through his breakdown or be court-martialed.
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