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Day 8 Assignments
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I learned that layering is a process, and emerges fairly naturally. My ideas keep shifting but also narrowing in on character and story. I’m also learning that I don’t actually need much time for actual writing, thinking happens passively and then writing happens quickly once I sit down to do it.
Tara’s Beat Sheet -Pass #2
Act 1
Opening:
INT. KAYLA’S MOM’S HOUSE – DAY
Meet Kayla looking after her very ill Mom
Priest comes in to help Mom, pushes Kayla to face reality of her death, Kayla in denial.
Kayla final chat with Mom, heartfelt
Theme – Kayla looks after her Mom, caters to her, we see she doesn’t think of herself at all.
Priest tells her that her life is her own, she is in denial (Priest shows us the ending – freedom)
Inciting incident:
EXT. FUNERAL – DAY
Mom’s funeral
Kayla tries to crawl into grave with her Mom – theme
Priest consoles her
EXT KAYLA’S HOUSE – DAY
Priest helps Kayla with a job and apt in the city.
Theme – Kayla tries to cater to him
EXT. DRIVING – DAY
Kayla drives to city
INT. APT. – NIGHT
Landlady shows Kayla the place, she moves in
Landlady is florida wannabe retired golfer living in her own fantasy – freedom
EXT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla drives up, it’s intimidating
Theme – our personal imprisonment
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla meets warden, he scares her. Meets other social worker, he’s awful
Warden: This is going to be hard, you’ll probably fail
Social worker: this place sucks, you will fail
INT. APT. BUILDING – DAY
Kayla meets neighbor, funny, embarrassing interaction
Nieghbor: she is the embodiment of Kayla’s future, assertive, strong, self determined
EXT APT. BUILDING – ROOF – NIGHT
Turning Point: Kayla is lonely and wants to run, ideates suicide. Neighbor intervenes, suggests 10 dates, Kayla reluctantly agrees.
Neighbor saves her from herself.
INT. NEIGHBOR’S APT – NIGHT (?)
Neighbor helps Kay with profile
Act 2
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla meets some inmate / clients
Inmate 1 – Tries to borrow money
Inmate 2 – Tries to seduce her
Inmate 3 – super angry, chases her around the room, all chained up
INT. KAYLA’S APT. – NIGHT
Neighbor and Kayla go over date responses. Writes back to 9.
IINT. JAIL – DAY
Warden gives her pep talk.
Basically, he’s trapped in his life, ends up telling her his problems. Just don’t get killed.
INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Date 1 – Kayla cries on her date, doesn’t work
Date goes to bathroom, doesn’t come back
INT. JAIL – DAY
inmates pull a fast one on her, she’s embarrassed. The guards laugh at her too. Kayla brought in cookies for inmates.
Inmate 1 – I’m innocent, Kayla makes notes, wants to help
Inmate 2 – I’m innocent, my family, Kayla makes notes
Kayla brings innocent stories to warden, guards mimick inmates stories, make fun of her innocence and cookies.. Kayla finds feces in her office.
INT. WINE BAR – NIGHT
Date 2 – Kayla is desperate, doesn’t work.
Date is overwhelmed , goes to the bathroom, doesn’t come back.
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla tries to mediate between 2 inmates, comically bad
Inmates dump on her instead
Kayla working hard on inmates cases
EXT. STREET – DAY
Date 4 – Kayla date with indifferent guy, motorcycle that she is terrified of and freezes on, and they can’t talk.
Date is unable to look at her, she tries to console him, he erupts on her and speeds away.
INT. BAR – NIGHT
Neighbor pep talk and laughs, girl’s night out.
Neighbor advice
Kayla obsesses over helping the inmates
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla meets with Inmate 1, makes a connection – small
Inmate New – helps her understand truth in some profound way.
EXT. RES TAURANT – NIGHT
Date 5 – Kayla meets with someone like her, not interested.
Date seems to like her, he has 5 kids, widowed, cries all over her. She agrees to help with kids.
EXT. BASEBALL GAME – DAY
Kayla with the dates kids, he shows up but leaves them with her, they are awful.
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla approaches warden wanting to help inmates, gets cold shoulder, ends up writing a bunch of reports for the warden and his asst.
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla is manipulated by an inmate, ends up running a drug errand on the outside, almost gets herself killed.
EXT. BOAT – NIGHT
Date 6 – Kayla meets an avoidant narcissist – she’s interested.
Date is super self-involved and highly critical, fits with her self image.
INT. KAYLA’S APT – DAY
Neighbor tells her to walk away, she agrees but secretly not. She texts him.
INT. GYM – DAY
Neighbor takes Kayla to a self-defence course, Kayla struggles miserably.
Intimidated by instructor
INT. KAYLA’S APT – NIGHT
Narc guy calls back, they go out, she sleeps with him.
INT. JAIL – DAY
Warden approaches Kayla with mor paperwork, she does it. Dad guy calls with another babysitting thing. She agrees.
INT. KAYLA’S – NIGHT
Narc guy calls again for sex, it’s humiliating but she’s into him.
INT JAIL – DAY
Turning Point 2: Narc date ghosts her, warden suspends her when he finds out she helped an inmate on outside. She finds out her Mom left everything to the church.
Act 3
EXT. KAYLA’S APT – ROOF – DAY
Neighbor and friend #2 come to help her
INT. CAFÉ – NIGHT
Date 7 – Kayla goes out with indifferent guy, she confronts him. She leaves in the middle.
EXT. CEMETARY – DAY
Kayla visits her Mom’s grave, heart to heart, puts it behind her.
Faces some facts, angry at her, then forgives her.
EXT. BAR – NIGHT
Kayla has fun with neighbor and friend
She’s getting freer
EXT LUNCH PLACE – DAY
Date 8 – Kayla meets a much older guy, lied about his age. His wife finds out about the date and confronts them, tries to shame her, she fights back.
EXT. PARK – DAY
Narc calls her, she gets together with him, he apologizes profusely, they sleep together.
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla goes back to work, meets with inmate 1, discuss his anger issues, Kayla tries to help. They help each other.
Kayla tells another inmate she can’t help him.
And same for warden
INT. KAYLA’S APT – NIGHT
Kayla dates Narc, going weirdly but he’s calling at least
INT. JAIL – DAY
Kayla gets positive movement with inmate 1 and other inmates seem to be responding
INT. BAR – NIGHT
Date 9 – Kayla meets up with guy, tell shim she’s seeing someone and sorry. He flips out on her. She holds her own.
INT. KAYLA’S APT – NIGHT
Kayla tells Narc she loves him, he soaks it up, doesn’t respond back.
INT. GYM – DAY
Kayla is getting more confident, back at self defense, feeling stronger
EXT. NARC’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Turning point A: Kayla finds narc with another woman
At first she’s apologetic, then finally stands up to him.
INT. JAIL – DAY
Turning point b: Riot breaks out in prison, Inmate 1 is killed, wife is devastated, warden blames her and fires her.
Kayla feels like she wrong all along
Act 4
INT. KAYLA’S – DAY
Neighbor and friend try to help Kayla, Friend tells Kayla she’s moving, the apt is being renovated, they all have to go.
EXT. KAYLA’S – ROOF – DAY
Kayla does soul searching. Spends time alone. Faces her suicidal fears.
INT. KAYLA’S – NIGHT
Narc tries to get back with Kayla, she dumps him.
Kayla gets message from guy who wants to date, Neigbor reminds her 10 dates, she agrees, he’s the last.
EXT. CAFÉ – NIGHT
Meets Date 10 / just friends.
INT. KAYLA’S APT – DAY
Says good bye to neighbor. Not sure what she’s going to do. Soul searching.
INT. SCHOOL – DAY
Applies for job in kindergarten
EXT. SOMETHING FUN – DAY
Date 10 again – going well.
INT. KAYLA’S APT – DAY
Warden comes over and apologizes, asks if she wants her job back, she says no.
INT. INMATES WIFE’S HOUSE – DAY
Kayla meets with wife of dead inmate, strikes up a friendship.
INT. GUY’S HOUSE – DAY
Date 10 again – this could be something. He gets her.
INT. NEW APT. – DAY
Moves into her new apt. She’s on her own and happy.
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Rachel’s beat sheet draft 2
What I learned:
Not sure. This draft is not as different from the last draft as I thought it would be. As in, I didn’t add as much new info re theme/antagonist as I expected or wanted. Makes me fear that I haven’t worked hard enough on it, although I know I did.
So much of what the antagonist does is behind the scenes, unseen, which has made it a challenge to write it in.
I am glad this does not have to be perfect, because things are STILL changing. The antagonist journey and events are changing, to be specific… I can see better now what needs to happen between antagonist and protagonist.
Act 1
EXT. CEMETERY – DAY
Opening: Funeral for Vic’s husband
EXT. HOME – DAY
Inciting Incident: A stranger shows up with an offer to buy their ranch; Vic refuses
Theme should show how Vic, stuck in old ways, feels compelled to keep the ranch running exactly the way her husband would have done it, nobody touch or change anything, as a projection of being a parent to Sarah
(Probably the worst explanation of theme that was ever written…)
INT. HOUSE – DAY
Family meal – Sarah ‘innocently’ asks questions about her real mother, long estranged
EXT. CORRAL – DAY
Vic and Sarah start training a particular horse but Vic is being a helicopter parent/teacher
INT. HOUSE – DAY
Sarah writes a letter, then asks someone to mail it for her when they go to town
Placeholder – we see how important it is to Vic to run the ranch because of the memory of her husband, she’s also trying to do it FOR Sarah; Vic and Sarah butt heads over anything and everything
INT/EXT HOME – DAY
Sarah receives an answer to her letter, this surprises her very much; she sneaks off to meet someone, and we see that it’s her mother (who wants control of the ranch; has promised Sarah they can be a family again)
Turning Point – Placeholder – Vic is still stuck in Old Ways when it comes to the turning point
Act 2
EXT. HORSE PASTURE – DAY
Vic, out working in the pastures, discovers a fence cut down and horses running loose; Sarah helps her fix the fence
EXT. CORRAL – DAY
Vic and Sarah work with the horse but don’t get along
INT/EXT HOME – NIGHT
They wake up to their barn on fire, must rush around and put it out
Placeholder – Sarah sneaks out of the house to meet her mother
Vic stumbles across a letter of Sarah’s, finds out she has contacted her mother (but doesn’t find out all of the plans)
Placeholder – Vic stubbornly refuses help/advice/moral support from her in-laws
Act 3
EXT. CORRAL – DAY
Vic works with a horse, then one of their people returns from the pastures injured having been shot
Placeholder – they are unsuccessful in tracking down the saboteur; Vic is on edge
EXT. CORRAL – DAY
Sarah goes out and tries to ride a horse she can’t control, gets thrown, Vic freaks out
INT/EXT HOME – DAY
Vic and Sarah have a major argument, say lots of hurtful things, Vic finds out that Sarah never truly loved the ranch and felt neglected by her father, Sarah runs off angry
INT. HOUSE – DAY
Vic finds Sarah gone and a ransom note in her place
Act 4
EXT. MOUNTAINS – DAY
Vic locates Sarah, finds out she and her mother staged the kidnapping and ransom to bait Vic out there (and that Catherine was behind everything from the start, the pressure to sell out and the sabotage)
EXT. HOME – DAY
Family members go out to find them
EXT. MOUNTAINS – DAY
Vic helps Sarah escape
Catherine causes a stampede to try to kill Vic
The uncles show up and have a melee with Catherine’s hired goons
Placeholder – still haven’t found out what happens to the villain at the end
EXT. HOME – DAY
Sarah is home safe, she thinks Vic is dead because of her
But Vic is brought home injured but alive
EXT. OTHER LOCATION – DAY – some time later
Vic and Sarah leave the ranch in their family’s capable hands, to build a new life together
Theme showing that she is able to see Sarah as her own person now, and can relate to her on better terms, not just as an extension of her father.
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I learned: that even though what I put forth on the page might not work down the line – it’s a good starting point – it gives me something to work with – something to mold into a better shape. I have a clear idea of my protagonist but I definitely need more fleshing out of my antagonist – this kind of deep dive(s) is most definitely not for the faint of heart – good luck to all of us out there !
Act 1
EXT. ST. CATHERINES PRIVATE SCHOOL – DAY
Opening: FIRST DAY OF MIDDLE SCHOOL
Bobby is no longer a little kid but not yet a teenager…
EXT. BOBBY’S HOME – DAY
Inciting Incident: Bobby’s older teen sister Eileen is kicked out of the house – she is pregnant
EXT. OUTSIDE CATHOLIC CHURCH – DAY
Bobby asks his mother if Eileen is like Mary and did God magically put the baby inside her too?
Placeholder: Bobby’s mother is extremely religious – she has multiple shrines placed throughout the home and lots of and lots of candles …..
Theme: Loss of innocence – Bobby is not a kid anymore and he must grapple at home without the protection of his sister. He starts to realize that she protected him from their crazy mother
INT. BOBBY’S HOME – NIGHT
Without his sister to protect/spare him from his mother, Bobby is scared of his mother – she screams and rants about Jesus, sins, and various saints….
EXT. ST. CATHERINES PRIVATE SCHOOL – DAY
Bobby causes a ruckus in front of school – he SKEETCHES – attracting the attention of boys a little older than him known to be in a local neighborhood street game
Placeholder – With Bobby’s sister gone, he turns to his father – but his father is leaving for an extended work trip leaving Bobby all alone with his mother…….
EXT BOBBY’S HOME – DAY
Bobby is hanging out on his doorstep – he didn’t want to go with his mother to church so she left him outside locked out of the house. A couple older kids from school (the same ones who were impressed with the ruckus he caused) see him and invite him to hang out with them.
INT/EXT HOME – DAY
Without Bobby’s sister around, his mother focuses solely on him – he even catches her watching him sleep. She grows obsessed with her son, especially since her husband is gone more and more. She has control issues, especially due to being raised by her cruel aunt who would often lock her in the basement without nourishment (her own parents having perished in a car crash)- her aunt was deeply religious and taught her the (cruel) ways of the one true Lord….
Turning Point – Bobby joins a gang – his initiation consists of robbing a local neighborhood liquor store – he pulls it off – barely
Act 2
INT. ST. CATHERINES PRIVATE SCHOOL – DAY
Bobby’s counselor is worried about him – he isn’t doing well in his classes – due to his always hanging out with his slightly older troublemaker friends . . .
INT. BOBBY’S HOME – NIGHT
Bobby’s mother punishes him – she whips his back with a studded rosary. Bobby cries and tries to call his sister but his mother has removed the telephone now the only phone is in her room . . .
INT/EXT BOBBY’S FRIENDS HOUSE – DAY
Bobby hangs out at his friend Kyle’s house after school – they shoot at small animals in his backyard. Bobby kills a squirrel and he is saddened but hides his feelings from Kyle.
Placeholder – Bobby tries to contact/see his sister. His mother is scaring him, she is acting crazy, she keeps lighting candles, praying out loud, and counting her studded rosary – he thinks something is wrong with her.
Placeholder: Flashback – Bobby’s mother has repressed memories of a priest coming to visit her aunt – the aunt let the priest harm her while she was in the basement – she disappeared into her mind during these “holy visits” from the priest….
Act 3
INT. ST. CATHERINE’S PRIVATE SCHOOL – DAY
Bobby gets a new arts teacher – the previous teacher was elderly and suddenly passed away. The new teacher Mrs. Williams is much younger – and she intrigues Bobby.
INT. STAGE – DAY
Bobby gets interested in the arts – Mrs. Williams invites him to join an after school theater arts club. Bobby wants to but he can’t – he has gang activities he must parktake in – joy rides, dirty movies, beer, weed, and other mischief.
INT. BOBBY’S FRIENDS HOUSE – DAY
Kyle lets Bobby crash with him – but Kyle’s family are all drug addicts and they press Bobby for money for anything of value – Bobby happily goes out looking for scores.
EXT. TRAINYARD – NIGHT
Bobby breaks into a freight train and shows the score to his friends and some older gang members but things go terribly wrong – one of his friends is killed and some including Bobby are arrested.
EXT. BOBBY’S HOME – DAY
Because Bobby is not yet a teenager he is let back into his mothers custody – the worst possible place for him he thinks – he would prefer juvie to being alone at home with his mother…
INT. BOBBY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Bobby is punished severely by his mother. She also finds a hidden drug stash in his room. She uses a hot iron poker from the family fireplace to burn Bobby with. Bobby runs away.
Act 4
EXT. LOCAL WOMEN’S SHELTER – DAY
Bobby tracks down his sister but she is staying in a home for only girls. Bobby is not allowed to stay with her.
Placeholder: Bobby’s sister confesses that their mother is not only crazy but she is a murderer – she killed her aunt – by smothering her face with a pillow so it looked like she died in her sleep……
INT. ST. CATHERINE’S PRIVATE SCHOOL – DAY
Bobby has no one left to turn to – he confesses everything to Mrs. Williams. She notifies the proper authorities immediately.
Placeholder: No one, not even Bobby can get in touch with his father….
EXT. BOBBY’S HOUSE– DAY
Bobby’s house is on fire – firefighters get his mother out alive just in time. She keeps slapping her face with her studded rosary and shouting hail mary’s. She has bloody welts on her face and is taken to the psych ward.
INT. BOBBY’S FATHERS CAR – DAY – some time later
Bobby finds out his father has a secret family across town. He goes to live with them and his father and will soon go to a new school – where he will hopefully start a new and better life….
Theme: Growth and rebirth – Bobby can grow into the person he wants to become – if he so chooses – out of all the darkness there can be light – rejuvenation after great and many tragedies…..
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I learned that I had already had most of the Antagonists beats in there already. But it was good to discover a couple more that help beef up the plot and build more moments of intrigue. Also, it helps to flesh out my theme so I can think about it and refine it and/or revise it.
Theme(s): Will have to narrow this down as I continue, or maybe this is just 4 different ways to express the same theme:
The relationship between two different generations is a fragile one that needs to be nurtured, lest it be damaged.
Prejudices between age groups/generations will happen, and if we don’t work through them, they will be used to divide us and encourage us to make the other generation scapegoats for our own fears.
Each generation needs the other generation more than we care to admit.
The survival of us as a society depends on different generations working together as equal contributors to society.
Act 1:
INT. GARAGE
Unidentified male loading up a high-tech remote controlled car
EXT. MIDWEST GAS STATION
Middle-aged Couple pulls out of gas station in an old RV after filling up. They drive self-centeredly as they pull out onto the highway. A modern-looking car follows them.
INT. CAR ON HIGHWAY
Wife argues about husband’s driving. The remote car takes the road behind them.
EXT. HIGHWAY
After time with the couple getting to know them, their dynamics, and their subtext (all the time, the car slowly approaches from behind), then the remote car makes its first attack.
EXT. HIGHWAY
Chuck’s first thought is to escape/outrun, throw the ghost-car off course. That doesn’t work because the ghost car has an updated GPS, and he doesnt. But he remains in denial, highlighting his stubborness.
EXT. HIGHWAY
Then the car disappears.
EXT. GAS STATION
Wife convinces chuck to call highway patrol. He doesnt want to, so she does.
Ext. Highway Rest stop
Highway patrol cannot locate the car, but when the police can’t find the car, Chuck feels made a fool of. Chuck says he’s not going to contact authorities again without proof of some sort, which starts a fight with his wife.
EXT. HIGHWAY
The car reappears to them. (apparently its smart enough to outsmart the cops) and begins to chase them again.
EXT. HIGHWAY
New plan – They see the car again and confirm it’s unmanned. Once Chuck sees its unmanned, he goes against wife’s wishes and attacks back somehow.
Act 2:
EXT. HIGHWAY
A cat and mouse battle ensues. Husband realizes traditional societal norms for resolving highway conflicts are not working because of the new tech of the car.
EXT. REST STOP PARKING LOT IN MOUNTAINOUS REGION
TE – his 3rd thought is to sabotage the car. but if he did it entirely his way, it is clear it would backfire. But because of something his wife suggested, he modifies his approach.
EXT. Highway
His plan succeeds. He takes the ghost car down. This makes him feel justified, affirming his lack of trust in the new-tech. (He doesn’t give his wife credit for her part of the solution)
EXT. REST STOP PARKING LOT IN MOUNTAINOUS REGION
Midpoint Turning Point – They just took down the one thing in life the car-creator loved like a son.
Full of rage/revenge, the man decides to personally go after the couple. Now, a high-tech electic car is following them, but this time there’s a driver. we learn, along with the couple that our enemy is a skinny 20-year old kid.
EXT. HIGHWAY MOUNTAIN PASS
TE – Chuck can’t blame technology anymore. Now its good ole-fashioned “man vs kid”. But wife is not going to tolerate being “hijacked” along for the ride. Big battle: Chuck Vs. Kid and Wife vs. Chuck. A “lose-lose” for Chuck
EXT. DOWNGRADE SLOPE
Kid sets up a trap.
Act 3:
EXT. DOWNGRADE SLOPE
Chuck runs over a flurry of rocks that the kid setup as a trap, and then his steering doesn’t work, Chuck flies into a fit of rage, humiliating himself in front of his wife. This makes us wonder what is the deeper cause of so much rage? (wife knows its his fear of inadequacy)
EXT. BOTTOM OF DOWNGRADE SLOPE
The kid’s car approaches them as they sit in their RV, helpless, on the side of the road. It does donuts in the dust. Then it circles around them. But then the kid drives off, leaving them stranded in the desert.
EXT. DESERT – NIGHT
Chuck now has to protect his wife against the wildlife of the desert for a night. This highlights his fear of not having the tools and skills to take care/protect/provide for his wife with basics of food, water and shelter.
PLACEHOLDER: What’s the kid doing? Now that we’ve been following him, don’t we need to know?
EXT. DESERT – NIGHT
They will have to work together to come up with a solution. They spend the night in the desert, but make their way out of it by morning by calling an uber. (Is Chuck at the mercy of an Uber driving millenial?)
EXT. MOTEL ON OUTSKIRTS OF TOWN
As uber pulls near the motel, Chuck sees the kid’s car in the parking lot. He makes the uber driver past as they duck down in the backseast. Then Chuck has him drop them off at the Walmart.
EXT. WALMART TYPE STORE
Without wife, Chuck shops for a gun.
INT. MOTEL ROOM (different motel)
Wife uses psychology and the hotel internet to start to predict the driver’s next move.
INT. WALMART TYPE STORE
Since Chuck never owned a gun before, Chuck must humbly ask the store owner for advice on how to use it.
INT. MOTEL ROOM
Chuck plots killing the kid when the kid sabotages their RV, but his wife’s pleas hold him back from going that far.
Act 4:
INT. MOTEL ROOM
They discuss a trap to outsmart the milennial, but they’ll have to risk destroying the RV. They also have to have the motel clerk teach them how to use a new tracking app.
EXT. RV IN THE DESERT
The kid has returned to the RV to inspect. That’s when Chuck returns to the scene of the crime, alone, to confront him.
EXT. DESERT HIGHWAY
More sophisticated high-energy/suspense cat/mouse scene here.
EXT. DESERT HIGHWAY
Chucks plan worked. Kids car crashes. Now the kid is trapped in his car in the desert, beeding. Chuck and wife have to decide what to do. Do they approach? Do they leave him for dead, finish him off themselves, or try to help him?
INT. KID’S CAR
Chuck and wife approach his car. The kid sees them approaching and starts crying. Their act of approaching proves to the kid that they are a worthy opponent and earns his respect. Because of that, the kid feels shame. When the wife sees that, she is affirmed that they need to help him. Wife ends up being the “healing” this kid needs. They get an ambulance.
EXT. HIGHWAY
In the rental car, Chuck and Wife turn around and drive back to the East Coast, not quite ready to retire.
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What I learned doing this assignment is…persistence is key. Quality will come later.
ACT I
OPENING:
INT – LIVING ROOM – DAY
Katie is live streaming and gaining popularity for her picture perfect life. It’s fake and she isn’t being herself. She’s driving a wedge between her spouse and two teenage girls.
INCITING INCIDENT: During a live stream her husband comes out of the closet. He is trying to share who he really is and she rejects it.
TE1: Katie is humiliated in a very public way. She tries to downplay this as a prank but that backfires. She doesn’t want to admit the truth to her viewers.
CATALYST: Katie’s husband files for divorce.
TE2: Katie is determined to convince her husband that it’s just a mid-life crisis. She is convinced he’s going through an identity crisis when she is the one having the meltdown.
ACT IIa
INT – BEDROOM – NIGHT
Katie confronts her husband but he is ready to move on with his new life. She sees him happy for the first time in a long time.
PLACEHOLDER – Katie gets encouragement from her two teenage daughters who are preparing to leave for college their senior year. Katie starts to feel more alone. She confides in a new coworker, Bridget, who always puts herself out there.
PLACEHOLDER – Katie tries to win back her husband but it fails miserably.
TE3: Not sure what but something must happen for her to feel empowered to start moving on. She signs the divorce papers and her husband moves out of the home.
ACTIIb
TURNING POINT: Katie starts seeing others and goes on dates.
PLACEHOLDER – Katie goes on a date just as a favor to her friend and actually has a good time.
TE4: She gets the feeling of being desired and likes it. She even has an intimate moment with a female acquaintance. She finds a good man but doesn’t know how to be in a relationship.
INT – WORK – DAY
Katie gets a lesson or two in how to find herself from her new friend Bridget. She takes her under her wing as far as dating, makeup, style, clothes, etc.
PLACEHOLDER – Katie has to get back into the dating scene after years of being married.
INT – HOSPITAL – NIGHT
Katie’s husband is attacked and in his vulnerable state asks Katie to have things go back to the way they once were.
PLACEHOLDER – Katie agrees and the husband moves back home. Bridget is upset with Katie because she’s back where she started. She confronts her.
ACT III
INT – HOME – NIGHT
TE5: Katie declines his offer because she’s grown and actually wants to be happy regardless of the pain they’ll both endure if alone.
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WILL’S BEAT SHEET DRAFT TWO
This was an important exercise for me, because I’d had a sneaking suspicion that I was taking the villain for granted, and sure enough, tracking his beats helped me crystalize his vibe a bit more, and he’s developing into a formidable foe. I think a lot will come out in the writing, too.
—- ACT ONE —-
EXT. INT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – COLD OPEN – NIGHT
ANTOINE comes to a Homestead and finds four freshly killed bodies. Intro JEAN CAYATTE who has just escaped from a century of imprisonment. He poses the question, “Who will stop me from doing my bad stuff?”
EXT. DESERT ROAD – DAY
A man named JEREMIAH SMITHMOUTH drives a wagon away from Ambition. A man named BEN WHEELER accosts him. (Is he robbing him?) Ben is headed for Ambition, AZ. He’s chasing a man. Jeremiah warns Ben to not go to Ambition. The town is damned.
Ben discovers that Jeremiah is traveling with his three young children. Ben decides not to rob them. Because the kids are so cute.
Ben ignores Jeremiah.
EXT. AMBITION, ARIZONA STREET – DAY
A young man named WIL TUCKER needs a place to sleep and is told to find LAUREN KILKENNY, who he finds lying out back in laudanum stupor.
EXT. FOOLS GOLD SALOON – DAY
Wil helps Lauren sober up. He’s kind to her, which she appreciated. He’s looking for a place to spend the night, someplace hidden, adding mystery.
EXT. AMBITION STREET – DAY
The arrival of SARAH PARSONS and her father, CONRAD. She stunning. She trips. Wil catches her. Something is kindled.
EXT. HOTEL – DAY
Sarah encounters John Kelley, who appears to be a drunk. He seems to recognize her. The encounter bothers her.
INT. HOTEL – DAY
Sarah sees Wil climbing into the nearby hayloft with his stuff. Intrigued.
EXT. AMBITION, STREET – DAY
TE: When crossing the street, Lauren is accosted by two Apaches, who catch a glimpse of her eyes. They tell her they need to take her to their chief. She refuses. SHERIFF JAKE THORNE misinterprets their aggression and shoots one of the Apaches dead and takes the other (CALICO) into custody.
INT. HAYLOFT – DAY
PLACEHOLDER: Scene with Wil. I’d like to bring up the addiction early on. She’s interested in him, but only kinda. He tells her she needs to get sober.
INT. SALOON – DAY
A crowded evening. Nervous townsfolk. Wil shows up with Sarah Parsons. Hurt blooms in Lauren. She decides to have some Laudanum
TE: Lauren manages to deny herself the indulgence. Only just barely.
EXT. AMBITION, AZ – NIGHT
Night falls on Ambition. Maybe a montage.
INT. SALOON – NIGHT
Massive turning point scene.
ANTAGONIST MOMENT 1: Jean Cayatte enters the Saloon. Maybe a short scene outside. Sees Sarah Parsons. Is transfixed. He believes that she’s someone he can turn into a mate.
Scene should be surreal and weird. He tries to take her into his arms. Wil fights back. Cayatte kills him. All hell breaks loose.
TE: Lauren comes face to face with him. Vampires exist! Ben Wheeler is there, too. His presence will make sense later.
At a key moment, Sheriff Thorne and a bunch of others fill the saloon full of lead from outside. Lauren, Ben and Sarah escape.
EXT. AMBITION – NIGHT
Big escape scene. Lauren and Ben try to get Sarah back to the safety of her hotel. Cayatte catches up to them. This time, they’re saved by JOHN KELLEY, who seems to know how to fight him.
TE: Lauren sees for the first time that something can stand against the vampires.
EXT. AMBITION ALLEY – NIGHT
Face off between Kelley and Cayatte. There’s history there. But Cayatte isn’t interested in fighting. He only wants one thing.
INT. HOTEL – NIGHT
Sarah thinks she’s safe in her room. She tries to close her window. Cayatte grabs her and she’s gone.
EXT. AMBITION STREET – NIGHT
Lauren and Ben see it from outside. Cayatte seems to carry her off as a swarm of bats.
Who the hell was that guy?
—- ACT TWO —-
EXT. AMBITION TOWN SQUARE – MORNING
Conrad Parsons delivers a thunderous speech about the godless town of Ambition. And decries the loss of his daughter. You need to do something, he implores. _Go get this man!_
EXT. AMBITION TOWN SQUARE – DAY
A ten-man posse forms. JAKE tries to round up more, but none are coming. It’s a terrified town.
EXT. AMBITION STREET – DAY
Lauren confronts Ben, who’s about to ride out of town. Help us! But he’s got what he’s come for. Wil’s body lies wrapped in a blanket on his horse. This is not his fight. You should do it yourself. Stop asking others to do your work for you.
te: Lauren is told she has the strength to be a hero.
EXT. AMBITION TOWN SQUARE – DAY
Riders ask Jake if he knows where to go. He absolutely has no idea. They consult a map. Then he remembers… that APACHE.
INT. JAILHOUSE – DAY
Calico refuses to help. They make him an offer he can’t refuse. He says okay. And now they have a guide.
EXT. JAILHOUSE – DAY
Lauren confronts Jake and says she’s going. He won’t let her but won’t tell her why. She insists she’s going anyway. He locks her in a jail cell.
EXT. ROAD OUT OF AMBITION – DAY
The posse rides. Absolute badasses.
INT. JAIL CELL – DAY
Lauren tries to escape. She fails.
EXT. KATE BOGGINS HOME – DAY
They ask for her opinion. She wants to join, because she thinks something happened at the Andersson Homestead and that’s where they should go. But they refuse because Kate is a wild-haired free slave and ain’t no room for her in that group. Dailey calls her a filthy slave or something.
EXT. HIGH DESERT ROAD – DAY
Ben rides with Wil’s body. The body twitches. He’s alive! But when he’s let out of the blanket he burns. Before Ben can even recover from the shock, he spies a wagon off the track.
EXT. HIGH DESERT – WAGON – DAY
The wagon belongs to the Smithmouth family. And everyone has been slaughtered. Enough of this. Ben turns back toward Ambition.
INT. JAIL CELL – DAY
Lauren mopes. Then Ben Wheeler offers to free her. He does, by accidentally tearing the wall of the jailhouse down.
EXT. HIGH DESERT – DAY
Lauren and Ben have to decide where to go. Lauren knows someone who’s wise. Also, she’s half Indian. She can track. But then realizes she’s hopeless at it.
EXT. HIGH DESERT – DAY
TE: Quitting the opium Part One Lauren tries to take some Laudanum. Ben catches her and gives her a choice. She chooses the drug. But she feels terrible after that and throws the rest of it away. (She’s got more hidden away.)
EXT. HIGH DESERT RIVER – DAY
Lauren cleans herself up. Sees her reflection. Taking a bit of pride in her appearance, trying to fix her self-esteem.
EXT. KATE BOGGINS HOME – DAY
She wants to throw in with the two, but Ben refuses. Lauren overrides him, showing her first glimmer of leadership.
Also, she says she knows where the posse is headed.
EXT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – EVENING
The posse ride up. The place shows no sign of life. Or death for that matter. The blood we know should be there is gone. Jake decides they’ll stay there the night.
EXT. HIGH DESERT FOREST – EVENING
Placeholder: Boggins, Ben and interact, and Lauren and Ben clash, possibly with the beginning of a mutual respect.
Boggins says something about how she’s a survivor (SETUP)
INT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – EVENING
The posse members are unwinding. Having a bit of drink.
Hints that they are not alone in the house. Something is in there with them. More for the audience than for the characters.
INT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – NIGHT
SOunds outside. It’s Lauren and Ben and Kate. There’s a conflict. Jake is pissed that she’s there.
Placeholder: Conflict between Lauren and Dailey, who all but admits he shot Lauren’s mother. This might be too extreme.
INT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – UPSTAIRS BEDROOM – NIGHT
TE: Quitting the opium Part Two
Lauren isn’t feeling well. Coming down off the opium. Tormented by guilt. She admits to Ben that it was she who killed Father Byrne. She tries to take some opium. Ben again catches her. But this time, she stops. Even though she’s a wreck. (She keeps it.)
INT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – NIGHT
_Midpoint “Oh Shit” Moment_
Shit hits the fan. Someone notices _Calico is gone_ and goes outside to look for him. About twenty people are standing there. And they’re no longer human. People who used to live in Ambition are now monsters.
INT. ANDERSSON HOMESREAD – NIGHT
_The Big Fight_
The place swarms with vampires. The posse puts up a valiant fight. Lots of things happen:
TE: Lauren kills her first vampire.
Jake is bitten in the calf by a vampire.
A fire starts.
Deputy Daily is killed in a satisfying way?
ANTAGONIST MOMENT 2: Lauren and Cayatte come face to face. And he recognizes her. Begins to understand her spirit. But Jake intervenes before Cayatte can take her.
Ben and Lauren escape out a back window and ride into the woods.
Everyone else is killed.
INT. ANDERSSON HOMESTEAD – NIGHT
Wounded, Jake faces Cayatte (he’s not there). He’s about to die. The house is an inferno.
Someone kills the vampire. A wild man. He grabs Jake and drags him into a trap door, which slams shut as the house collapses into fiery ruin.
EXT. WOODS – NIGHT
Ben and Lauren are pursued through the woods. Lauren smacks a branch, goes down. Ben comes back to help her. They’re both tackled. But it’s not vampires. It’s Apaches. Lauren blacks out.
—- ACT THREE —-
EXT. APACHE CAMP – NIGHT
Lauren regains consciousness. She’s safe. And Ben is there!
But who’s this John Kelley guy?
EXT. APACHE CAMP – NIGHT
_Story Time Part 1_
Possibly drawn out in stages. Kelley and an Apache Medicine man explain who Jean Cayatte is.
Cayatte and Kelley have been fighting each other since the 1700s. He’s been imprisoned in a mine complex nearby for the past 100 years and some damn fool let him out.
Kelley himself is part of an organization called the Threshold, whose main purpose is fighting vampires.
He has cool weapons. He has knowledge. And he’ll take it from here.
EXT. APACHE CAMP – NIGHT
_Story Time Part 2_
The Apaches tell her who she is, according to their dreams. She’s called the Changing Woman, and according to them, will help them find the one who can sew up the night with the day.
Lauren interprets this to mean she’s not a chosen one, but that she knows who he is. (It’s gotta be Ben – set this up)
EXT. APACHE CAMP – NIGHT
TE: Blended in with these dark tales is Lauren’s detox. It’s finally hitting her, and it’s brutal. A literal long, dark night of the soul. The Apache Medicine Chief recognizes Lauren’s addiction and reminds her that the battle has to be won by her.
EXT. APACHE CAMP – DAWN
The Apaches tell her that her father is dead. She learns the truth about him.
EXT. APACHE CAMP – DAWN
Lauren realizes she has a say in how things should go, and convinces him to accept their help. And a new posse of seven is born.
EXT. APACHE CAMP
Placeholder: Kate Boggins rejoins the group, reminding them all, ‘she’s a survivor.’
EXT. APACHE CAMP – MORNING
Placeholder: Perhaps a lovely scene between Ben and Lauren. Attraction forming, but some mistrust and misplaced irritation.
EXT. APACHE CAMP – DAY
Kelley is leaving to face Cayatte on his own.
Lauren says no way, Juan. They’re coming with. A show of leadership. Kelley tells her she has no idea what she’s saying, but he grudgingly acquiesces.
EXT. HANGING VALLEY – DAY
John, Lauren, Ben and Kate are led by Calico and another Apache to a valley where they come to an old mine. The Apaches are forbidden to follow, so they leave them.
EXT. HANGING VALLEY – DAY
The Apaches talk about Lauren. She will find the Changing One, Calico says, but she will die.
EXT. MINE ENTRANCE – DAY
Kelley gives them a pep talk. Leave Cayatte to me. He’s too dangerous.
EXT. MINE ENTRANCE – DAY
Incredibly, Jake shows up, accompanied by a haggard man — ANDERSSON, the patriarch of the family that lived at the Homestead. He’s the man who saved Jake, and had been lurking in the crawlspace below his house. His sanity is in question.
EXT. MINE ENTRANCE – DAY
Jake is too far gone. But Kelley gives him a special substance that restores him a little ways back toward humanity. It won’t last, but it’ll do for now.
EXT. MINE ENTRANCE – EVENING
TE: Primer on Threshold weaponry. Lauren understands for the first time the power and ability of the Threshold.
The goal for the final stage is for them to simply get a crate — something Kelley calls an N.E.D. — into the mine and light a long fuse. Then get the hell out. It will eradicate the nest.
INT. BLACK MINE – NIGHT
The Seven enter and find themselves fighting nerves.
INT. BLACK MINE – NIGHT
Bats swarm. Incredibly intense. And when they clear, Lauren is gone. She has fallen into a crevice, most certainly to her death.
Conflict – Ben wants to go after her, but it’s clear that there’s no hope. And they don’t have time. It’s past sunset.
—- ACT FOUR —-
INT. BLACK MINE – NIGHT
They find an old working elevator and get on…
INT. BLACK MINE – CREVICE – NIGHT
Lauren’s death/rebirth in the depth of the mountain. She has some matches. And don’t forget the Button.
Lauren frees herself and falls into an underground river that takes her into…
INT. BLACK PALACE – NIGHT
On the shore of an underground lake, in the middle of a wild, Gothic wonderland.
INT. BLACK PALACE – NIGHT
Placeholder: A huge set of interconnecting scenes that leads Lauren into despair and hope. She meets someone she knows. She’s saved by Ben. They kiss. Kelley confronts Cayatte for the last time, and everyone fights a horde of vampires.
Everything goes to hell quickly. They succeed in defeating the vampires, but Cayatte is too strong, and makes quick work of them and their plan to destroy the nest and everything in it with the Threshold equivalent of a nuclear bomb.
Lauren sacrifices herself and saves Ben, expressing her love at last
Major turning point. She goes back, and the wild sequence of survival gives her one, last chance.
ANTAGONIST MOMENT 3: Lauren, trying to escape, is caught by Cayatte. Their main conflict, face to face. They fight, but he bites her. The bomb goes off, blasting them out of the mountain, just before sunrise. Realizing he’s lost, Cayatte spares her life and allows the sun to destroy him.
[[Note that here Cayatte finally realizes that he had it wrong. He can’t recreate his lost love based on how she looks. But rather who the person is. But of course, by this point, it’s too late.]]
Lauren is slowly transforming into a vampire and sitting on the mountainside, exposed to the sunlight. Three colleagues of the late John Kelley find her at the crucial time and work their magic, inducting her into the organization, telling her that her previous life is gone.
—- CODA —-
50 years later, Lauren’s love interest, Ben, is on his death bed. Lauren visits him in his final moments, not having aged a day.
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