Day 8 Assignments

[Eric Humble]

What I learned doing this lesson is: that even for a thriller, there are so many possibilities for creating story points within the confines of the contained space. This is one of the skills I needed most and have struggled with — fleshing out enough events to tell a feature film-length story in a contained screenplay. I was able to brainstorm a number of different events, some of which I integrated into the outline, some of which I discarded. But the fact that so many possibilities showed up just by a simple brainstorm session has really given me the confidence to write a thriller — with all its inherent convolutions — as a contained script. I have a wealth of potential material to choose from. I’m excited to see where we go from here!

Act 1:

Opening: D’Quan is in an argument with his strung-out brother when a gun goes off and his brother is killed.

D’Quan is on the run and in hiding at the community outreach center.

Inciting Incident: Robert shoots an innocent man, Standish, while hunting for D’Quan. D’Quan witnesses the shooting, and drags Standish off.

Turning Point: D’Quan calls Robert – he’s got the man he shot, who will die unless he treats the wound… which he’ll only do when Robert proves him innocent! Threat: Hope: D’Quan will treat Standish. Fear: D’Quan will let him die unless Robert does exactly what he says – but he won’t tell him his end goal, just which rooms to examine, what object to look for, etc.

Act 2:

New plan: Robert must figure out where D’Quan is… then must reinvestigate the crime scene – to nail D’Quan!

Plan in action: Robert keeps D’Quan on the phone to listen for background noise, wants to hear from the victim… and tries to examine the crime scene under the nose of his mentor and hero, Markway.

Left Alone: Hope: Robert gets Markway out of the crime scene area by distracting him – lies that he thought he heard a sound. Better if one of them goes around the perimeter to sneak up behind the “intruder.” Fear: Markway doesn’t come back… and Robert discovers a secret door that leads to a dark corridor, where he really does hear someone. And Markway isn’t answering his call.

Psychological issues: Hope: Robert gets some clues while Markway is away. Fear: But Robert has a bout of PTSD from having shot the man.

Psychological Issues: Hope: But Markway returns and pulls him out of it. Fear: D’Quan plays on his increasing anxiety… makes it sound like Standish is much worse than he really is.

Hiding out: Hope: D’Quan has found a place that has what he needs to keep Standish alive, and is a safe distance from Robert. He’ll never be found. Fear: Markway is idly tapping on the pipes in rhythm to a song he has a habit of humming as he examines a crime scene… and Robert can hear the pipe reverberating over the phone from D’Quan’s location. Knows he’s here somewhere.

Robert uncovers evidence that D’Quan supplied opioids illegally to his brother and others – he really is a criminal, and part of what he’s been doing is trying to cover this up.

Triggering each other: Hope: Robert now believes D’Quan that there was a third person there. D’Quan has a clue that will help Robert – he knows about Club Shoot Up. Fear: D’Quan presses him on the police track record of shooting unarmed Black men – and lumps Robert in with them in light of him shooting Standish. Robert refuses to help anyone hostile to the police, refuses to accept that he now stands in the ranks with corruption and racism. D’Quan refuses to acknowledge or help anyone who assumes he’s an inherent criminal simply because he’s Black.

What is this character afraid of? Hope: Markway sees Standish on the surveillance monitor, but assumes D’Quan is the one who shot him. Fear: Markway’s plan involves Markway himself going in to rescue that guy while Robert keeps watch on the screen.

Midpoint Turning Point: Just as the gunshot victim takes a turn for the worse thanks to Robert’s resistance, Robert discovers the body of a drug OD victim in a secret freezer in the sub basement of the Youth Center — evidence that D’Quan may actually be innocent – there’s something more going on here than a family spat involving drugs.

Claustrophobic: Hope: In the darkness, all the exit signs go off – but Robert sees a sliver of moonlight. There’s an exit out to the street! Fear: It’s not moonlight – it’s the light from a freezer. D’Quan has just lured him into a small room where they store dead bodies. Robert is trapped in the freezer with the body when the lights go out. Can’t find the exit.

Act 3:

Rethink everything: Robert reevaluates his values system elevating the police above all else and his inherent racial bias.

New plan: Robert needs to find out what else has been going on at the Youth Center in order to prove D’Quan didn’t do it.

Forced to deal with each other: Hope: Robert and D’Quan are finally on the same page, working together. Fear: They still don’t trust one another, and each arms himself.

Trapped / Prisoner: Hope: Standish sees an opportunity to escape if he keeps pretending he’s really injured. D’Quan will have to get more medical supplies and he can make it to the subbasement or crawlspace that connects the clinic to the Youth Center. Fear: Standish gets more injured during his escape attempt and now he really needs D’Quan to perform surgery on him… but D’Quan won’t because he tried to escape.

They discover Markway’s scheme.

Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: Markway is the murderer, with a mission to eliminate D’Quan and now Robert – and Robert just gave him D’Quan’s location!

Act 4:

Standish is fading – D’Quan can either get him to a hospital and reveal his position or stay hidden but Standish will die.

Final plan: Robert has to head off Markway in order to protect D’Quan, as D’Quan performs an impromptu surgery to extract the bullet from Standish in order to save Standish’s life.

Out of control situation: Hope: Robert believes D’Quan and may be able to talk him down. Fear: Markway has called for SWAT reinforcements who are about to storm the building – and D’Quan is legitimately taking Standish hostage, knife to his throat as Markway closes in on him.

Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Robert lures Markway into confessing everything on record as they play cat-and-mouse through the subbasement connecting the clinic to the Youth Center.

Dangerous: Hope: Robert, unarmed, goes into the woodworking shop where there are power tools he can use as weapons against Markway. Fear: Markway kills the power. All Robert has is a nail gun at low charge.

Restricting: Hope: Robert has found a memo that links Markway to the real estate CEO, and has to get it to D’Quan… but Markway is somewhere nearby and the walls are paper-thin. But Robert uses a code with D’Quan, sending Markway in the opposite direction. Fear: Except he reaches a dead end. Has to double back to the direction he sent Markway if he hopes to get the intel out to D’Quan… or anyone.

D’Quan faces Markway and shoots him to save Robert.

What’s the worst that could happen? Hope: Robert has gotten away with it. Fear: Standish doesn’t back him up once they’re rescued – debriefs his people about Robert shooting him.

Resolution: Robert exonerates D’Quan, but D’Quan is still railroaded for the minor violations by a system that favors White people.

Robert joins Standish’s team; he and Standish vow to expose Markway’s misdeeds despite a system that wants to sweep the scandal under the rug.