Lesson 6

[Renee Miller]

Renee’s Character Death Track

What I learned doing this assignment is how to kill off the characters methodically. Designing the character death track ahead of time will help to keep the story on track when I start writing, which will help to make the story the best it can be.

ACT 1 – SET UP FOR HORROR

Atmosphere of Evil Established
Decades ago, a young historian ventured into a forgotten section of the building, following strange symbols etched into the walls. As shadows moved unnaturally and whispers turned into screams, his lantern failed, leaving him to face an incomprehensible entity in total darkness—an event that still haunts him to this day.

Horror Situation: Someone is trapped in a pitch-black room as the shadows seep in through the cracks.

Reaction: Edmund finds his way up to the top of the lighthouse and hides in the light.

Connect with the Characters
The group is introduced: Stacy (the leader), Jack (the rebel), Eliza (the innocent), and others as they navigate their strained relationships and secrets in the claustrophobic, shared building. Stacy’s discovery of an old journal hints at the town’s dark history.

Horror Situation: Stacy checks the building’s stairwells, freezing in terror as a shadow slowly approaches, its form twisting into her worst fear. Reaction: denial. She brushes it off as a trick of the light because of the storm.

Horror Situation: One of the residents discovers an old ritual book but hears the voices of a loved one calling for help from the darkness, almost luring her deeper.

Reaction: try to solve it. They cautiously investigate the sound but retreat in fear when the voices grow louder and more menacing.

The Characters Are Warned Not to Do It
The historian, Edmund, now a reclusive older man, warns Stacy that uncovering the journal’s truths could unleash something terrible. He cryptically mentions that “the darkness must not be disturbed,” but no one takes him seriously.

Denial of Horror
The characters rationalize the growing strange occurrences as the result of the storm: flickering lights, missing people, and strange noises in the hallways are brushed off as stress and bad luck.

Safety Taken Away
The building’s generator fails, plunging the entire structure into near-total darkness except the dim emergency lighting. The group realizes they're trapped with no way to contact the outside world and the storm blocking all exits.

Horror Situation: A shadow mimics the voice of a loved one, leading a grieving mother into danger.

Reaction: She embraces the monster.

Character Death: Tracy
Why: to start the horror; she gives up on life after her son’s death
How: Gives Up (Disorientation to death: the creatures warp the environment, leading victims into endless hallways or trap-like spaces where they die of exhaustion, starvation, or insanity, all while hearing whispers of torment.)

Horror Situation: A character is kidnapped by the shadows, disappearing into the walls.

Reaction: the group witnesses the group firsthand, causing panic and disbelief. Some are paralyzed with fear, while others try to find an explanation. Some flee the area.

Character Death: Chuck
Why: The character is in denial; as a former military officer, he doesn’t believe in anything that he can’t see with his own eyes.
How: surprised (Absorption: the creature drags victims into the shadows, where they dissolve into darkness, leaving no physical trace behind.)

ACT 2 – THE POINT OF NO RETURN

Monster: The Nature of the Beast
The shadow creatures reveal their presence subtly at first—whispering voices, distorted reflections, and shadows that move unnaturally. Their ability to manifest victims’ fears becomes horrifyingly clear when one character is lured into the dark by a shadow mimicking a loved one.

Isolated / Trapped / Abducted
The group is forced to huddle in the lit areas of the building, but their limited light sources begin to fail. The creatures start dividing them by manipulating the building’s layout and isolating individuals.

Horror Situation: A character is shackled by shadowy tendrils, unable to move as the others flee.

Reaction: the group fractures even more. Some hide, and some try to escape.

Character Death: Edmund
Why: Monster made the decision because Edmund knows their history and is the only one who can stop them.
How: Surprised (Suffocation: Shadowy tendrils wrap around victims, choking the life out of them while inducing visions of their deepest fears.)

One of Us Killed
The shadows claim another victim in a horrifying display, dragging them into the darkness. When the others find their remains distorted and unrecognizable, panic spreads through the group. The group runs, but one member is frozen in fear. The others try to drag her along, but she doesn’t budge. Stacy makes the decision to close the fire doors effectively cutting off the group from the members.

Horror Situation: One character refuses to take action, leaving the others vulnerable.

Reaction: one member tries to fight while the others flee.

Character Death: Jack
Why: made a bad decision; a young rebellious teen, Jack refuses to listen and gets trapped by himself.
How: Thrown into the monster (Distortion: victims are consumed partially, leaving grotesquely twisted, half-shadowed bodies behind as a warning to others.)

MIDPOINT: The Monster is Worse Than We Thought!
Stacy uncovers the full truth: the creatures were born from an ancient ritual gone wrong, tied to the town’s collective guilt and unresolved traumas. Worse, the creatures grow stronger with every death and every ounce of fear, meaning their survival only empowers the darkness.

ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR

Full Pursuit by the Killer
The shadow creatures relentlessly pursue the group, extinguishing their light sources one by one. The shadows manipulating doors, stairwells, and hallways thwart the group's attempts to find safety, turning the building into a labyrinth of terror.

Horror Situation: Two characters who are in the basement trying to get the generator going are chased through the building’s basement by shadows, unable to find the exit.

Reaction: The try to flee, but one trips and falls. They get up and try to fight the shadows.

Character Death: Anthony
Why: a character flaw that compels them to take the wrong action; he will do anything to protect his wife.
How: self-sacrifice (Absorption: the creature drag victims into the shadows, where they dissolve into darkness, leaving no physical trace behind.)

Horror Situation: The other person in the basement is forced to watch as a friend is consumed by the shadows.

Reaction: They hide, paralyzed by fear and guilt, unable to intervene as the shadows consume their friend.

Character Death: Rebecca
Why: the monster made the decision
How: Back into it (Distortion: victims are consumed partially, leaving grotesquely twisted, half-shadowed bodies behind as a warning to others.)

Terrorized
The creatures exploit each character’s personal fears and guilt, driving them to madness. Paranoia sets in as the group begins to turn on each other, unsure of who can be trusted and whether any of them can truly survive.

Horror Situation: Two characters must decide who to save when the shadows approach—a heartbreaking dilemma.

Reaction: one character sacrifices himself and embraces the shadows, giving the other a chance to hide.

Character Death: Patty
Why: A character flaw that compels them to take the wrong action
How: Charge blindly into action (Fear-induced death: the creatures manipulate victims’ minds, forcing them to relieve their worst memories or confront their greatest fears until their hearts give out or their minds shatter.)

ACT 4

Fight to the Death
The group makes a desperate attempt to fight back, gathering the last of their light sources and barricading themselves in a central room. Stacy insists the only way to stop the creatures is to complete the ritual, but the group’s paranoia and growing fear cause division, and they begin to turn on each other.

Hysteria
As the shadows grow stronger, the group descends into chaos. One member accuses Stacy of being the cause of everything and sabotages her efforts to perform the ritual. The creatures manipulate their paranoia, creating illusions of loved ones and past mistakes, driving the survivors to lash out at each other.

The Thrilling Escape from Death
Stacy and the remaining survivors make one final attempt to reach the generator to flood the building with light. They manage to restore power briefly, creating a glimmer of hope, but the shadows adapt, extinguishing the light and plunging the building into complete darkness.

Horror Situation: A shadow creature pretends to retreat, luring the group into a false sense of security.

Reaction: Believing they’ve won, the survivors step out of hiding, only to be ambushed, leading to several brutal deaths.

Character Death: Eliza
Why: They made a bad decision; as the town finance manager she’s been embezzling funds and neglecting upkeep on the building.
How: Escape attempt takes them into it

Death Returns to Take One or More
One by one, the remaining survivors are claimed by the shadows in increasingly horrifying and personal ways. Stacy, realizing the ritual cannot stop the creatures but only delay them, sacrifices herself to buy the others time. However, the others are too consumed by fear to act effectively and are quickly overpowered.

Horror Situation: A character faces impending doom as their flashlight dies in a shadow-infested stairwell.

Reaction: Escape and hide

Apparent Character Death: Stacy
Why:
How: Charges blindly into action

Resolution
The storm eventually clears, and the town is eerily quiet as spring arrives. When the tunnel reopens, those who left for the winter return to find the building abandoned, with no sign of life. Inside, the rooms are marked with frozen, distorted bodies and cryptic symbols burned into the walls. Whispers echo faintly in the halls, hinting that the shadows are dormant but still present, waiting for the next intrusion into the darkness. They find Stacy hidden, barely alive.

Horror Situation: The victims’ bodies are left behind, grotesquely distorted into a half-shadow form.

Reaction: The storm clears, leaving the returning townspeople horrified by the discovery of the abandoned, blood-stained building and faint whispers that hint at the shadow’s lingering presence.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Hello Renee,

Can I ask you how you are able to keep you’re formatting when posting your assignments? Thanks, and have a great day!

Barry

[Renee Miller]

Hey Barry,

The formatting on this WordPress site is atrocious. I post the assignment and then click on the three little dots in the upper right corner and edit it. When it brings you back to your reply, uncheck the box that says to keep a log of the edit, and then hit the post button again. This usually will get rid of the one solid block of writing and put it back to your original formatting.

Renee

[Nick Walsh]

LESSON #6

Nick’s Character Death Track

What I learnt: Some more developed (in my head) personalities I could kill off uniquely as a natural reaction of their traits. The others I’m still working on.

CONCEPT: Six twenty-something buddies go on a week-end mountain bike adventure in the Sierras and end up getting lost, only to become prey to a demented family who collects eyeballs.

Characters:
Leader/Moral One
—Joe Evans (21): Works as a Vet Assistant. He’s the organizer of the group and feels responsible for their well-being. He’s the only one with a gun.

Rescuer
—Gene Harms (20): An unpublished, but determined, spec screenwriter with writer’s block. He’s using this getaway to clear his mind, maybe find something to write about.

Complainer
—Lee Harris (21): Computer geek. Feels naked because he can’t use his cell phone in the wilderness.

Out of control / Obnoxious
—Frank Gargano (23): Privileged. A worldly bum. Looking for adventure.

Rebel / Rule Breaker
—Manny Gargano (20): Frank’s spoiled little brother. He’s a hotshot, master of the mountain bike. Oblivious to life’s troubles. Has Frank to protect him. Very close to Sammy.

Innocent
—Sammy Mills (19), best friend with Manny. They do everything together. One could get the impression that they are gay for one another.

The Carrier
—Buck (40s): NOT a member of the bike group, but the local who brings the horror to the group by getting the Bro gang angry and vengeful at him; and, as an extension, at the bikers.

Character death order:

Character Death 1:
Buck

Why?—His macabre death is retribution for the firecracker incident at the bar and helping the mountain bikers escape.

How?—He is found dead, hanging from a tree branch with his eyes gouged out and his skin peeled from his body.

Character Death 2:
Manny Gargano

Why?—To put his older brother and his best friend in the awful position of deciding to kill him to put him out of his misery.

How?—He is found mutilated on the rocky river bank, barely alive, with eyes gouged out and his torso skinned and pulled over his head.

Character Death 3:
Lee Harris

Why?—Lee is blinded by the fog and steps on a twig

How?—Unable to be seen in the fog, he is shot and killed by a panicked Joe. Sammy is accidentally shot in the leg, as well.

Character Death 4:
Frank Gargano

Why?—The horrid reality of their situation drives him crazy.

How?—He goes mad and charges at a Bro and flies off a cliff with him.

Character Death 5:
Gene Harms

Why?—We, as the audience, logically assume he will be the one to survive and write the most horrific horror screenplay ever, or how else could this story be told? But, alas, grisly mortality takes him from us prematurely. His version of the horror will never make it to the screen.

How?—He steps on a booby trap that horizontally sweeps a springy tree limb with a broad axe attached to the end and severs his upper torso from the rest of his body.

Character Death 6:
Joe Evans

Why?—The remnant Bros are closing in.

How?—Joe makes a suicidal last stand that allows Sammy to escape to freedom.

Character Survivor:
Sammy Mills

Why?—He is protected at critical times by luck and, being the youngest, the other bikers. Ultimately, he must make the desperate decision to abandon the now sightless Joe, if he’s to make it out alive.

How?—He leaps into the raging river and grabs onto a tossing log. He is found by a fisherman the next morning passed out on a log jam on a calm river bend.

xxx

[Deborah Daughetee]

Debbie’s Character Death Track

What I learned from this assignment is that it is more exciting to have the monster kill in various ways instead of the same way for each death. It’s exciting to up the anti on how the characters are killed making each death more terrible than the one before.

Act One – Set Up For Horror

Atmosphere of Evil Established- Crew member is trying to remove weird seaweed from paddle unseen by anyone but the audience.

Horror Situation: Crew member is grabbed by a tendril of mud and dragged back into the depths of the river. Samson hears a scream and investigates, but the paddle wheel is now free of seaweed so he assumes the crew member did his job.

Reaction – Escape: The crew member makes it back onto the deck.

Horror Situation: Crew member is grabbed by a tendril of mud and dragged back into the depths of the river. Samson hears a scream and investigates, but the paddle wheel is now free of seaweed so he assumes the crew member did his job.

Death: Crew Member

Why: He’s part of making this cruise happen

How: He’s dragged into the river by muddy tendrils and drowned

Connect with characters. Passengers and women arrive for the cruise for the inaugural cruise of the newly restored Revenant Queen.

Denial of Horror – Samson reports the missing crew member but captain thinks he just ran off. Samson and the Captain are warned that the riverboat is cursed but the Captain laughs it off. Samson isn’t so sure.

Safety Taken Away – the body of the crew member floats to the surface.

Horror Situation: Screams are heard from inside a room. The doors are locked and no one can get in.

Death: A room full of men

Why: The men were conducting an auction of the women performers

How: It’s not seen on camera, but the aftermath shows the room dripping with water and mud, and the men drowned.

Reaction: Break into the room and discover all of the men are missing. The room is covered with slime, mud, and water. Confusion and apprehensive. They decide to take the boat back, but…

Isolated/Trapped/Abducted:– The boat hits a snag.

Reaction – Denial – The captain sends Samson into the water to free the snag.

Monster: We see tendrils break the surface.

Horror Situation: Samson is attacked by giant Catfish

Reaction and Escape: Quinn tries to save Samson.

Death: Samson

How: He gets into the water to remove the snag and is attacked by giant catfish. Quinn tries to save him, but he is pulled away and under.

Why: He’s in the water. However, he will be the one who returns later on.

Act 2, Point of No Return

Isolated/Trapped/Abducted A thick fog rolls in. It’s impossible to see to remove the snag.

Horror Situation: Bonnie Lou disappears.

Death: Bonnie Lou

Why: She has just come from giving Cassius information on the girls. She is in on the auction.

How: She is confronted by a form we only see in shadow. But the aura of this creature is water, and Bonnie gasps, unable to breathe. Water burbles out of her mouth. She drowns. Tendrils snake in and take her away. She is found later splayed out on the paddlewheel.

Reaction : Quinn and Lilith search for her.

Horror Situation: Quinn and Lilith join him, and they follow the sounds. They hear a plop, as if something fell into the river. They find Bonnie Lou’s body splayed out on the paddle wheel covered in mud
.
Midpoint

Reaction: Lilith makes a speech to reveal the monster.

Horror Situation: An Amorphous humanoid figure bursts into the room

Reaction: Quinn and Lilith run through the halls of the riverboat. They Hide

Horror Situation: The monster finds them but doesn’t attack. She shows her face. Then Jonas comes in.

Reaction: Try to figure it out. Why didn’t it kill them? It was a woman under all that mud. What is happening?

Death: Jonas

Why: Jonas has locked up the girls, so they can’t escape. He bursts in when the monster is confronting Quinn and Lilith.

How: The monster embraces Jonas. When she pulls away, he is covered in leeches which suck him dry of blood. Then, every leech explodes, spreading blood all over the room.
Terrorized: The monster is now roaming the corridors. She finds the girls, but Lilith gets there and throws salt on her. The monster flees in pain.

Act 3 – Full Out Horror

Hysteria

The Captain is lowering a private rowboat into the river. It is the only one that hasn’t been sabotaged.

Death: Captain

Why: he is trying to escape in a rowboat and is in on the auction

How: The rowboat becomes a part of the monster’s body, and the Captain is folded up into her.

Horror Situation: The monster finds Lillith alone and chases her through the corridors.

Reaction: Lilith hides in a room. The monster begins to leak under the door, but then pulls back and moves on. Lilith discovers Cassius books and the fact that he was selling her and her girls to the highest buyer.

Resurrection: Samson climbs up to the riverboat deck.

How: Monster kept him prisoner but didn’t kill him. He broke free.

Horror Situation: Quinn and Lilith confront Cassius. The monster finds them.

Reaction: Hysteria. Cassius tries to sacrifice Lilith to the monster. Quinn grabs Cassius. It’s a fight to the death here.

Death: The Monster

Why: Because it’s the monster

How: Samson comes in with a bag of Salt, which dries her up and breaks her connection to the river.

Death returns to take one more. Cassius gets a gun and holds it on Quinn, Lilith and Samson. He is going to kill Quinn, keep Samson as a slave, and sell Lilith.

Resurrection of the Monster

Death: Cassius

Why: He’s the real villain of the story

How: The monster uses a tendril like a needle and injects copious amounts of river water into him until he explodes into a mess of water, mud and crawly things.

Resolution: The monster returns, but turns into a woman. Acknowledgement of the familial connection to Quinn. Then she returns to the river and is gone. The snag and the fog disappear and the riverboat is free to return to shore.

[Patricia Semler]

Pat’s Character Death Track

What I learned doing this assignment. I knew how I was going to dispatch Dahlia. That was the first scene I wrote from the original idea. Knocking off everybody else was an exercise in intrigue and variety while keeping within the witch’s abilities. Of course the witch had a real problem with men so they get the gruesome endings.

ASSIGNMENT
1. Give us the order your characters die in. With each character tell us the why and how.
• Character Death 1: Librarian who delivers books to Dahlia
• Why: She’s a threat to Esperanza’s efforts to escape.
• How: Loses control of possessed car, crashes into wooden bridge, taking it down.
•
• Character Death 2: Rusty Collier, the average kid easily spooked
• Why: The whispers awaken traumatic memories
• How: He’s lured to the root cellar where he’s drowned in quicksand.
•
• Character Death 3: Teacher Calvin Franklin
• Why: He’s male, in charge, maybe too familiar with Dahlia, the friendship misinterpreted as aggressive
• How: He falls off the roof when his equipment is possessed and undone
•
• Character Death 4: Developer Ivan Whitson
• Why: An obnoxious power male
• How: trying to jumpstart one of his construction vehicles he’s strangled with the cords
•
• Character Death 5: Johnny Ray Cobb
• Why: Stubbornly religious he’s arrogant enough to try to exorcize the spirit
• How: A nail gun is turned on him
•
• Character Death 6: Bryan Stockholm
• Why: This jock picks the wrong time to hit on Arianna which riles Esperanza with righteous fury.
• How: She provides Arianna an escape route, takes her place to entice Bryan close enough to use an electric saw on him.
•
• Character Death 7: Dahlia Stewart
• Why: The remaining adult determined to protect her charges. She decoys the witch by attempting to refocus the binding spell.
• How: She sacrifices herself for the blood the spell needs.
•
• Character Death 8: Arianna Rogers
• Why: She’s a basketcase after all this, being led out to safety by Mika and Nat.
• How: She loses her balance navigating the broken trusses of the bridge, drowns.

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Barry’s Character Death Track
What I learned by doing this assignment is it made me more familiar with my characters and gave me a chance to think more about their traits and role in the script and give more suitable names and character descriptions when the time comes.

Character Death 1 : Alex, the Leader.
Why? Alex is the leader. Killing him first makes us fearful for the others.
How? He is attempting to protect Beth as she goes outside to look for her phone she dropped earlier. She wants to call for help. He is blindsided and snatched. We don’t see the monster, but blood splashes on Beth’s face.
Character Death 2: Chad – the Obnoxious/Out-of-Control one
Why? Chad becomes abusive to the others. He tries to take control of the group and makes a bad decision that puts them in more danger. Maybe he decides to leave, and the others refuse to follow.
How? The monster stalks him. He can’t tell which direction the monster is coming from. He eventually walks backwards cautiously searching for the monster and back into it. He screams and we don’t see what happens.

Character Death 3: Bennie – the Complainer
Why? By this time, we are sick to death of his complaining and are cheering for him to get killed!
How? He is sitting next to the wall inside the cabin next to a window. The monster stealthily moves towards the window. Bennie seems relaxed inside when all of a sudden, the monster’s arm crashes through the window and pulls Bennie through the window. We hear him screaming.

Character Aparant Death: Meghann, the Moral One
Why saved? She is the one who always tries to do the right thing.
How? In the final confrontation, the monster comes after her and Nashoba gets the creatures’ attention. The creature slams Meghann across the room, knocking walls down and debris piles on top of her. She isn’t moving and we assume she is dead.

Character Death 4: Nashoba, the Sacrificial Lamb
Why? He sacrifices himself for the others.
How? The monster is going after Beth. Nashoba distracts the monster. The monster slams Meghann across the room and turn towards Nashoba. The monster tears him apart killing him.

Character Death 5: Beth, the Rebel/Rule Breaker
Why? It seems that the monster has left. Beth screams obscenities in the direction the monster leaves and taunts the monster. Suddenly, the monster appears and knocks her head off. She dies because she couldn’t keep her mouth shut!

[JD Oppen]

JD’s Character Death Track

What I learned doing this assignment is, while strange to write about, how there can be a flow to writing about killing and death, almost like a dance. Even made some side-notes for myself about possible changes. There are so many ways this can go, lol.

Characters’ Order of Death:

Jeff, Candace and Trace survive

First to die: Dina
– She is the innocent one and in love with Angelo, the main character and monster
– Visited by the monster, he does not harm her
– she is attacked by a bear
– Monster attacks bear
– At last attack the bear moves out of the way
– Monster ends up killing innocent girl by accident

Middle Deaths: Bull, Violet, Jazz, Spike
– Bull is so gung-ho he attacks the monster is is killed
– After being saved by Jazz, Violet is slaughtered
– Jazz had arm ripped off, monster smells the blood
– Monster finds and kills jazz
– Goth Male attacks the monster because it killed his GF
– Goth Male dies brutally

*Apparent death: Trace
– Goth girl is killed, bear attacks monster
– She comes back in the end

Survivors are Jeff, Candace, and Trace*

****************************************

Character Death 1: Dina

Why: Because she is the innocent one.

How: By accident by the monster lunging to kill a bear which moves out of the way, the monster and Dina had an affection for each other

Character Death 2: Bull

Why: Escalates the horror as he is the first character to attack the monster

How: Charges blindly into action and is violently ripped to shreds

Character Death 3: Violet

Why: Because we think she escaped the monster by running, then saved by Jazz, brought to safety, so we think

How: Escape attempt takes her into it, and she is slaughtered by the monster

Character Death 4: Jazz

Why: Monster has it out for him because he could not kill him on the first try, after Jazz’s bad decision, saving Violet from the monster’s attack, now he is in a tree with a weapon he made.

How: Attempts something that fails (saving violet AND making a weapon to kill the monster) Initially has an arm ripped off and has to deal with it for a while, but the monster follows his blood trail, sniffs the blood, knows he is in a tree and gets his revenge by further dismemberment.

Character Death 5: Trace

Why: Trace is the apparent death. She is infatuated with the monster.

How: Sacrificed – she sacrifices herself to save the monster. Trace tries to stop the bear when he attacks the monster and is inadvertently killed, so we think.

Character Death 6: Spike

Why: Because he attacks the monster for killing his girlfriend Trace, who we don’t know is not actually dead

How: Betrayed – because the monster killed his girlfriend (so he thinks). Suffers a brutal death as the monster does not stand for being attacked.

***********************************

Character deaths built into my outline:

ACT 1 — SET UP FOR HORROR

Atmosphere of Evil established:

Group of classmates talks about going up to isolated cabin area that is closed to the public because a family was killed by a group of bears, all the while, the visuals are of the bear attack on the family, or just of the barren cabin location.

*Alternate Idea: News footage that is a one year anniversary after the family was killed talking about it, possibly a survivor, and discussing the fact the grounds remains closed to the public.

As well there is some chatter about bringing the main character, whose step brother and sister were mysteriously murdered in their sleep.

Horror Situation: Vicious bear attack
Horror Situation: News reel(s) of vicious bear attack
Horror Situation: Violent deaths of main character’s step brother & sister
Horror Situation: News reel(s) of their deaths
Horror Situation: Glimpses into horrific side effects of main character’s reaction to experimental medication

Reaction: These are really part of the opener

Connect with the characters:

Most characters are classmates watching 2 of their friends playing a championship football game. We see the character’s traits and get an idea how they are and may react in horrific situations by how they are with the game and/or each other. Some are friends watching the game, a couple are cheerleaders and 2 are playing the game. A couple are friends of the main clique, so they are kind of outsiders. The main characters is teased.

As well, 2 other characters somewhat unrelated to this group listen in and decide to go to the same abandoned location for the weekend. They are a scary goth couple, frightening to some just to look at.

Horror Situation: Goth couple talk about violence, and what happened at the cabin location

Reaction: Characters are frightened, some reluctant to go on the trip

The characters are warned not to do it:

The more outsider characters, a friend of one of the cheerleaders, the main character, whose the cheerleader’s friend has a crush on, are all apprehensive about going to this place because of what happened. One of the cheerleaders is also apprehensive. The school basketball player agrees with the football players about how cool, fun and exciting the trip will be in the face of possible danger… bears. Again the main characters is teased/taunted. He really does not want to go, but is mostly talked into it by the friend of one of the cheerleaders.

The goth couple are sitting behind those watching the game and talking about their upcoming weekend, and they chime in about the dangers, then discuss amongst themselves how they should go too just to scare the hell of the group of friends… or protect them. They tell the main character they got his back, establishing some type of friendship.

Horror Situation: Glimpses into horrific side effects of main character’s reaction to experimental medication

Reaction: more of the brutal mutilation of his siblings

Denial of Horror:

The football players are all for it, so is the BASKETBALL player. They are all tough guys, so they are not afraid and don’t think anything will happen. As well, one of the cheerleaders has a crush on the quarterback, so she goes along with what he says. Some of them laugh stating the only thing they have to fear is sleeping around the main character because of what happened to his siblings.

Horror Situation: Goth couple startles others, showing weird piercings & implants

Reaction: Characters are more uneasy, frightened about the trip

Safety taken away:

On the three hour drive, a couple of them fall asleep and appear to be visited by an entity while they sleep. As they get closer to the cabin area they are losing cell phone reception, it is intermittent. Even closer there are signs stating no trespassing, the area is closed to the public. The main characters is taunted again and the girl who likes him stands up for him.

The goth couple travel separately, they could care less about anything going wrong. They are not easily intimidated.

Horror Situation: Entity visits main characters while they sleep on the way to the cabin

Reaction: Those visited are intimidated by the entity, grow worrisome

Monster: The nature of the beast:

The goth girl drives, her boyfriend falls asleep on the way and is visited by the entity. He wakes shaken and frightened, which is way out of character for him. His girlfriend laughs but is also a little excited about the entity her boyfriend dreamt of… maybe even a little jealous.

Horror Situation: Entity visits male goth character on the way to cabin

Reaction: While he is looked, his girlfriend is jealous, she is crazier than him

ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN

Isolated / Trapped / Abducted:

As the main group gets closer their vehicle dies. They must make the rest of the trip on foot and sun is on it’s way down. Cell reception is pretty much non-existent. They reach the cabins at dusk, and there’s no turning back now.

It gets late and it’s time for everyone to sleep. Some of them are visited by the entity as they sleep. They wake in a frenzy. The football players tell them it’s nothing to worry about. They all reluctantly go back to sleep.

Horror Situation: Weather takes a bad turn, wind, some rain

Reaction: starting to lose cell reception in an eerie place

Horror Situation: No trespassing/danger signs, warnings to keep out and weather turns to violent thunderstorm

Reaction: Main characters’ vehicle dies in eerie location from motor  getting wet – they must find cabins on foot in the storm

Horror Situation: All cell reception lost – relied on phones for navigation, cannot find the cabins, darkness falls

Reaction: Make lean-to with tarp(s), They must sleep outdoors and search in the morning

Horror Situation: Fear of noises,

Reaction: think it’s bears, they think they are being  hunted

Horror Situation: Goth couple do not see the broken down vehicle

Reaction: They plow into it

Horror Situation: Goth couple’s injuries look bad, they find the others and frighten them from their bloody injuries

Reaction: The others help them, take them in, clean them up

Horror Situation: Through the night some sleeping characters are visited by the entity

Reaction: one of them is killed

Character Death 1: Dina

Why: Because she is the innocent one.

How: By accident by the monster lunging to kill a bear which moves out of the way, the monster and Dina had an affection for each other

Horror Situation: They search the darkness for the cabins

Reaction: Again they think they are being hunted by bears

One of us killed:

The group is again confronted by the entity and one of them is brutally killed in their sleep. This is really happening now. But no signs of anyone or anything entering the cabin.

Horror Situation: the entity attacks all victims in their sleep, they cannot wake, The characters who most taunted the main character suffer  brutal deaths

Reaction: The linebacker attempts to fight the entity

Horror Situation: Linebacker is mutilated

Character Death 2: Bull

Why: Escalates the horror as he is the first character to attack the monster

How: Charges blindly into action and is violently ripped to shreds

Reaction: The goth male takes control to make weapons, Got girl doesn’t like the idea because she is smitten with the  entity, and quarterback does not like him taking control and attempt to  stop him

Horror Situation: The quarterback and head cheerleader are attacked

Reaction: they barely escape, they survive  – for now

MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought!

Full pursuit by the killer:

The monster is the main character. His experimental meds turn him into a psychotic killer who attacks his victims in their dreams. Now the group of them are all in the same dream and fighting to survive as they realize who it is that’s attacking them.

Horror Situation: The other cheerleader is hysterical – runs and hides outside,

Reaction: she is found by the basketball player, she is being attacked and almost dead

Reaction: The basketball player attempt to save her, drags her back to  cabin

Horror Situation: They are both attacked in the attempt and the girl is  dismembered in front of him

Character Death 1: Violet

Why: Because we think she escaped the monster by running, then saved by Jazz, brought to safety, so we think

How: Escape attempt takes her into it, and she is slaughtered by the monster

Reaction: Basketball player manages to escape back to cabin, pleads to  be let in

Horror Situation: They open the door and one of his arms is ripped off by the  entity as he gets inside

Reaction: The girl who likes the main character is confronted and  realizes who he is, she warns the others

Terrorized:

The killer wages a brutal assault on the classmates who had taunted him. They are hunted in their dreams while the others are terrorized but trying to stop it from happening. They cannot wake.

Horror Situation: They fight to wake

Reaction: They do, the quarterback wakes the main character and beats  the hell out of him rendering him unconscious… They think they are safe

ACT 3 — FULL OUT HORROR

Fight to the death:

The victims are being brutally attacked. They are horrified, but must find a way to unite.

Horror Situation: Now that the monster is unconscious he attacks again

Reaction: this time his victims are awake

Hysteria:

Pandemonium ensues as the victims are being slaughtered, one by one.

Horror Situation: The basketball waits frightened in a tree with a weapon he made

Reaction: monster follows the blood trail from his missing arm

Character Death 2: Jazz

Why: Monster has it out for him because he could not kill him on the first try, after Jazz’s bad decision, saving Violet from the monster’s attack, now he is in a tree with a weapon he made.

How: Attempts something that fails (saving violet AND making a weapon to kill the monster) Initially has an arm ripped off and has to deal with it for a while, but the monster follows his blood trail, sniffs the blood, knows he is in a tree and gets his revenge by further dismemberment.

The thrilling escape from death:

The goth boyfriend helps to unite the group in their dreams. They must find a way to wake the main character so the killing stops. Finally the last few survivors are able to wake and wake up the main character. One of the survivors is the quarterback. He is furious with the main character. Though they appear to be safe now that they are all awake, the quarterback beats the main character, knocking him unconscious.

Horror Situation: The survivors must devise a plan quickly to kill the main character

Reaction: The goth girl tries to save the main character

Death returns to take one or more:

Because the main character is unconscious, he can attack his victims again. But this time the victims are all awake! They work together, deciding to kill the main character while he sleeps so he cannot attack them anymore.

Horror Situation: Bear attacks monster and Goth Girl tries to help the monster

Reaction: She is inadvertently killed (so we think)

Character Death 5: Trace

Why: Trace is the apparent death. She is infatuated with the monster.

How: Sacrificed – she sacrifices herself to save the monster. Trace tries to stop the bear when he attacks the monster and is inadvertently killed, so we think.

Horror Situation: Goth male attacks the monster out of betrayal.

Character Death 6: Spike

Why: Because he attacks the monster for killing his girlfriend Trace, who we don’t know is not actually dead

How: Betrayed – because the monster killed his girlfriend (so he thinks). Suffers a brutal death as the monster does not stand for being attacked.

Reaction: Quarterback seizes the opportunity and kills the main character as he sleeps – it’s over

Resolution:

The surviving victims succeed. They kill the main character and escape as the evil entity is sucked back into the dead main character’s lifeless body.

As they run to the goth couples’ vehicle to leave this place the evil is all sucked back into the main character… As the survivors flee in the car… the main character OPENS HIS EYES!

Horror Situation: Quarterback, head cheerleader, and main character’s girlfriend run for their lives

Reaction: the entity is slowly sucked back into the the  dead body

Horror Situation: They make it back to their vehicle but can’t get it started

Reaction: The last of the entity seeps into the main character’s dead body and the car starts, they drive away

Horror Situation: The main character’s eyes open!

[Barry Barry Durbin Durbin]

Thank you so much! I’ll try that. Good luck to you on your script!

[Ira Drower]

I. Lewis Drower Lesson 6 – Character Death Track
I learned how to create a death list for a horror outline. This helps to organize and identify if the carnage increases properly throughout the script.
Death Order/Mutated Character Name Why Character Died How Character Died
1 Angel Monster stalking prey during blood-red moon Harpooned by a lake plant with extending tentacles
2 Chano Made a Bad Decision – Ran to the garden shed with dirt floor Caretaker ties him to table – Unknown Shadow – kills him
Skeeter – 1 (wing 9) Survives For now
Diane – 3 (wing 2) Survives For now
3 Becky – 4 (wing 5) Innocent who was out when the blood-red moon 1st appears Blood loss when she steps on a carnivorous plant, chgs into water lily
Jack – 8 (wing 7) Miss Marie replaced his blood with chlorophyll Transformed into a monstrous plant w/vines for arms
Grace – 6 (wing 7) Survives Possessed by spirit of Miss Marie
6 Rob – 9 (wing 1) moral reason, to save Leah Captured by Venus Flytrap and dissolved by the plant
8 Leah – 5 (wing 4) Monster stalking Leah inside tank during blood-red moon Drowned by monstrous plant while unblocking tank obstruction
5 Tony – 7 ((wing 8) Bad decision – rode bike into gang searching for compatriot Shot by random bullet as he tries to escape, changes into a tree
Miss Marie – 8 (wing 7) survives
Caretaker – 2 (wing 1) Survives
Cartel Gang Leader 1 – 8 Survives Burned by the fire he started, swims to shore after using machete
7 Cartel Gang Member 3 – 6 Character in denial, meets his brother, Chano – now a plant Chano grabs brother and pulls him outside, stuck to a Strangle wood tree, choked to death
4 Cartel Gang Member 2 -7 character flaw-cartel leader sacrificed him to save himself Ripped apart by vines in a drawn and quartered.

[Ira Drower]

Reposting due to bad formatting:

I. Lewis Drower Lesson 6 – Character Death Track
I learned how to create a death list for a horror outline. Throughout the script, this helps to organize and identify if the carnage increases properly.

Act 1 Deaths:
1) Angel, Cartel pot grower : Monster stalking prey during blood-red moon
Harpooned by a lake plant with extending tentacles

2) Chano, Cartel pot grower: Made a Bad Decision – Ran to the garden shed with a dirt floor.
Caretaker ties him to the table; an Unknown Shadow kills him.

Skeeter, Group Home Teen, enables Becky’s drug addiction. Survives For now

Diane, Group Home Teen, spoiled – Survives For now

Act 2 Deaths:
3) Becky, Group Home Teen, talented swimmer, heroin addict.

Innocent who was out when the blood-red moon first appears.

Blood loss when she steps on a carnivorous plant, changes into a water lily.

4) Jack, College QB dating Diane is egotistical and not a Group Home Member.

When he suggests they go to the shed to find weapons, he is strapped to a table where Miss Marie replaces his blood with chlorophyll.

He transforms into a monstrous plant with vines for arms.

Act 3 Deaths:

5) Tony, Group Home Teen, leader.

Makes a bad decision – While attempting to get help he rode his bike into a gang searching for their compatriot.

He is shot by a random bullet as he tries to escape.

He transforms into a tree upon his death.

6) Rob, Group Home Teen, kleptomaniac, afraid

He dies for a moral reason, to save Leah, he sacrifices himself.

He is captured by a giant Venus Flytrap and dissolved by the plant.

7) Cartel Gang Member 3, Part of search party for other gang members.

His character flaw of being too scattered makes him expendable.
Gang leader uses him as Monster bait to protect himself.

He is attacked by many vines that pull him causing him to be drawn and quartered.

8) Cartel Gang Member 2, Part of search party.

Character is in denial when he opens cabin door and confronts his brother Chano, now a monstrous plant.

Chano grabs his brother and places him against a Strangle Wood tree.

The stringy, hairy bark envelops the man and strangles him to death.

9) Leah, Group Home Teen, the smart one.

Monster makes a decision and stalks Leah inside the large water tank during blood-red moon.

She is drowned by a carnivorous plant while unblocking a tank obstruction.

Miss Marie, a former camp owner – survives in her garden.

Caretaker, Former Camp Handyman – Survives

Grace, Group Home Teen, the moral one – Survives but is Possessed by the spirit of Miss Marie.

[David Zelitzky]

David Z's Character Death Track

What I learned doing this assignment is to pace and escalate the horror events and give them specific meaning.

Definitely in draft mode with preliminary ideas and escalating intensity

ACT 1
Atmosphere of Evil established: Open on unknown girl being dragged into the basement by faceless/masked man and shackled in the dark
They arrive at the ranch and decide to have a party and go swimming / croquet / volleyball

Claire’s father arrives. Claire grabs Marcus to hide the fact that Tasha is her girlfriend.

The Barn Punishment (Psychological & Physical Torture)

Character Death 1: Jordan
WHY: Sarcastic, doesn’t believe Father is as intense as he comes off and makes sarcastic jokes
HOW: The Colonel/Monster forces Jordan outside in the dead of night, stripping him down to his underwear and tying him to a post in the freezing barn. The Colonel whispers in his ear: “Disobedience must be corrected.”
REACTION: No one knows what happened to him. He's gone in the morning. They assume he just took off cause of the pressure.

2. The "Cleanse" (Waterboarding with a Sinister Twist)
Character Death: Jude/ Black, non-binary, Claire’s best friend
WHY: Trigger: Jude kisses their boyfriend/girlfriend by the fire.
HOW: The Colonel /Monster believes in “purification” and forces Jude into an old, water-filled livestock trough, holding their head under while calmly instructing them to "repent." The others scream, helpless.
REACTION: Escalation: Just before Jude drowns, the Colonel stops, letting them gasp for air. He coldly warns: "Love should be clean, not indulgent." The implication is clear—next time, he won’t stop.
They hear screams. Catch sight of the monster. Jude is unconscious. they know something is going on. They need to stick together.
The father says they can't leave. It's booby trapped. He's a paranoid schizophrenic and they're catching on to the fact that he has something to do with this. DO THEY SEE THE MONSTER?
They’re trapped with nowhere to go. Stuck and scared

ACT 2
3. The Obedience Drill (Military Training Turned Torture)
Victim: Tasha
WHY: Sargeant watches his monitors and see Tasha kissing Claire. Tasha tries to escape in the night. He drugs her – the monster takes over.
HOW: The Colonel catches her and forces her into a brutal, impossible obstacle course in the dark. She must crawl through barbed wire, climb an electrified fence, and sprint through an open field while dodging rifle shots at her feet. Escalation: If she fails, the Colonel forces her to watch a live-feed of her captured friends being punished, ensuring she follows orders.
REACTION: Everyone knows they’re trapped now and frantic to get out.

4. The Sermon Room (Mind-Breaking Isolation)

Victim: Marcus
WHY: Marcus defends Claire and refuses to kneel when ordered.
HOW: The Colonel locks Marcus in a pitch-black soundproof room with only a speaker playing old recordings of his sermons: “Obedience is strength. Disobedience is sin.”
Escalation: The darkness warps his mind. The whispers in the recording start to distort—Marcus hears his own father’s voice, his own self-doubts, his worst memories. It’s not just discipline—it’s psychological warfare.
REACTION: Everyone is looking for him. They know they’re trapped with no way out.

5. The Silent Hunt (Prey vs. Predator)
Victim: The entire group
Trigger: They attempt to escape through the woods.
HOW: The Colonel cuts the ranch floodlights, leaving them in total darkness. Then, he starts hunting them.
Escalation: He whistles an eerie military cadence, his voice echoing. He taunts them over the loudspeakers: "You think you’re free? Run. Let’s see how far you get."
Twist: He’s set silent traps—bear traps, tripwires, and hidden pits filled with sharpened bones from past victims.
6. The Confessional (Forced Confessions & Electric Torture)
Victim: Claire
WHY: Claire finally challenges the Colonel’s authority when he accused her of being a lesbian.
HOW: The Colonel straps Claire to an antique electric chair in the basement, forcing her to confess her "sins" while slowly increasing the voltage.
Escalation: He doesn’t ask about escaping—he demands she admit her queerness is a mistake. The true horror isn’t just the pain—it’s that Claire’s own father wants her to erase herself.
REACTION: She refuses to give in even if it kills her. Everyone is looking for her.

7. The Scapegoat Execution (A Friend is Forced to Kill Another) – after Colonel sees them make out…
Victim: Ryan and Marcus
WHY: The group refuses to obey a command.
HOW: The Colonel drags Ryan and Marcus into the yard and places a loaded rifle between them. He tells Marcus: "Kill him, or I kill you both."
Escalation: If Marcus refuses, the Colonel shoots Ryan himself—then hands the gun to Marcus for the next round. The horror isn’t just the death—it’s forcing a friend to become a killer.

ACT 3 –
FIGHTING, RESSURECTION – ULTIMATE FIGHT

DISCOVERS KATIE – EX GIRLFRIEND SHE THOUGHT GHOSTED HER
8. The Branding Ritual (Scarring for Obedience)
Victim: Jude
Trigger: They talk back after the Colonel misgenders them.

Horror: The Colonel ties Jude down and heats a branding iron, saying: “If you don’t know who you are, let me brand you with what you really are: disobedient.”
Escalation: The brand is shaped like a Bible verse—a permanent scar of religious control. But before he presses it down, the lights flicker, and he hesitates—his own demons surfacing.

9. The Mirror Punishment (Forcing the Colonel to Face Himself)

Victim: The Colonel himself (Unintentional Horror)

Trigger: The group finds his hidden past—his love letters and old photos of a male lover.

Horror: Ryan and Claire throw the old letters at him, forcing him to read them aloud. His repression breaks into pure rage.
Escalation: He begins self-harming, scratching at his own skin, screaming that it's a lie. The monster isn’t just external—it’s inside him, eating him alive.

10. The Final Act: The Boiling Room (Transformation into the True Monster)
Victim: The Colonel
Trigger: The group finally turns the tables.

Horror: The group traps the Colonel in the basement boiler room, where the heat warps his mind. He finally sees himself in the mirror—and sees the monster.

Escalation: His hallucinations intensify. He sees the ghost of his former lover. He screams, attacking his own reflection. His body contorts in the heat, his mind fully broken.

Climax: Instead of dying, he locks himself inside, embracing the flames rather than face the truth of what he is. His final words are not of rage, but of regret: “I could have been free.”

A Villain Who Breaks Himself: The Colonel isn't just destroyed by the group—he's destroyed by the truth he tried to bury.

1. The Forced Dinner (Eating with the Dead)
Victim: The whole group

Trigger: The group refuses to sit for dinner after the first punishment.

Horror: The Colonel drags them back to the table, force-feeding them while a rotting corpse sits at the head of the table—the mummified remains of a past victim who "didn’t obey."

Escalation: He speaks to the corpse as if it were still alive, saying: "Unlike you, these kids think they can disobey me."
Reaction: Claire vomits, Jude starts crying, and Ryan tries to flip the table but gets pistol-whipped.

2. The “Brotherhood” Ritual (Psychosexual Horror)
Victim: Marcus

Trigger: Marcus refuses to hit another friend as ordered.

Horror: The Colonel forces Marcus into an old military-style initiation, stripping him to his underwear, smearing mud on his face, and whispering: "You need to be made into a real man."

Escalation: He caresses Marcus’s face but instantly recoils in disgust, breathing heavily as though fighting himself. Then, enraged, he forces Marcus to kneel at gunpoint, screaming, "Say you're weak!"

Reaction: Marcus starts hyperventilating, realizing the Colonel’s rage is a mask for something even more dangerous.
3. The Gas Mask of Silence (Sensory Deprivation & Horror)
Victim: Jude

Trigger: They scream defiantly at the Colonel.
Horror: The Colonel straps an old military gas mask onto Jude’s face—but blocks the airflow, forcing them to struggle for breath.

Escalation: As they thrash, the Colonel whispers: "You don't get to speak. You don't get to exist." Just before they black out, he removes it, making it clear: "Next time, I don’t take it off."

Reaction: Jude hyperventilates as soon as it’s removed. Later, they whisper, "He wants to erase us."

4. The "Hunting Dog" Execution (Turning Victims into Killers)
Victim: Tasha
Trigger: Tasha tries to attack the Colonel with a knife.
Horror: The Colonel breaks her wrist, takes the knife, and hands it to Marcus, ordering him to "prove his loyalty" by stabbing Tasha.
Escalation: If Marcus refuses, the Colonel cuts her himself and hands Marcus the bloody blade.
Reaction: Marcus, sobbing, fakes a stab just to get the Colonel to stop. Later, Tasha whispers, "He’s making us into him."
5. The Ashes of Sin (Forced Body Horror & Branding)
Victim: Ryan
Trigger: Ryan mocks the Colonel’s rules.
Horror: The Colonel burns a Bible page and forces Ryan to hold the ashes in his mouth, whispering, "Cleanse your filthy soul."
Escalation: He duct tapes Ryan’s mouth shut and leaves him gagging on the ashes.
Reaction: Ryan convulses and nearly suffocates, later whispering: "He wants us to choke on his rules."
6. The Flooding Cellar (Drowning & Psychological Horror)
Victim: Claire
Trigger: Claire openly defies him.
Horror: The Colonel locks Claire in a dark basement as water begins flooding in. She must either escape or drown in total darkness.
Escalation: The Colonel speaks over an intercom: "Obedience is breath. Disobedience is drowning."
Reaction: Claire, gasping, starts hallucinating her mother warning her to escape.

The Mirror Room (Forcing Self-Hatred into the Open)
Victim: The Colonel (Unintentional Horror)
Trigger: The group leaves his old love letters out for him to see.
Horror: He stares at his reflection and sees himself as monstrous—his skin cracked, his younger self begging to be free.
Escalation: He punches the mirror repeatedly until his hands are bleeding, screaming at his reflection, "You are not real!"
Reaction: The group sees this moment and realizes: His worst fear is himself.
8. The Glass Coffin (Being Buried Alive)
Victim: Jude
WHY: They keep fighting back despite torture.
HOW: The Colonel buries Jude alive in a glass box underground, forcing them to stare up at the dirt slowly covering the surface.
Escalation: A small intercom inside plays the Colonel’s voice: "Let the weight of your sins crush you."
Reaction: The others frantically dig Jude out, but Jude emerges screaming, unable to stop clawing at their own skin.
9. The Branding Iron of Sin (Horrific Public Shame)
Victim: Marcus
WHY: Marcus refuses to denounce his bisexuality.
HOW: The Colonel heats a branding iron with the word "FRAUD" and presses it against Marcus’s chest, declaring: "This is what happens to men who lie to themselves."
Escalation: If Marcus passes out, the Colonel slaps him awake, forcing him to repeat: "I am a fraud."
Reaction: Later, Marcus whispers to Claire: "I never hated myself before. He wants me to."

10. The Final Horror: The Self-Destruction (The Monster’s True Form Emerges)
Victim: The Colonel (Final Transformation)
Trigger: Claire reveals his past love to the others.
Horror: The Colonel physically starts convulsing, his mind breaking. He sees his younger self, and in a terrifying moment of body horror, he scratches his own face raw, screaming, "I will kill this part of me!"
Escalation: Instead of killing Claire, he burns his own skin, trying to "purge" himself.
Reaction: Claire whispers: "You are the real monster. And you're afraid of yourself." The Colonel stares at her, terrified—not of her, but of what he’s become

• This reply was modified 2 months, 4 weeks ago by  David Zelitzky.
• This reply was modified 2 months, 4 weeks ago by  David Zelitzky.

[Pam Ewing]

Pam’s Character Death Track

What I learned from this lesson is that I need more death! I went back an added some random innocent and the other members of the wedding party.

1. Give us the order your characters die in. With each character tell us the why and how.

• Character Death 1: The Man who protects the bride

– Why: The groom is jealous of him. He has genuine affection for the bride which is threatening to the groom.

– How: He is given a tattoo with special ink that allows the groom to “program” his death. The programmed death is made to look like an allergic reaction – a painful one.

• Character Death 2 and 3: the other man and woman in the wedding party

– Why: The man asks too many questions about what the groom is always doing on his computer. For the woman, the murderer is just sadistically experimenting.

– How: The pair decide to go snorkeling where the woman’s breathing is cut off. As the man and the snorkeling escort team try to get her to the surface to breath, the man starts bleeding. His blood attracts a lot of sharks so that the team cannot fight them off. The team is able to get the woman back to the boat and get her to breathe again. But she goes into a seizure and dies.

• Character Death 4: the bride’s best friend – now the killer is identified as the groom

– Why: He’s mad because as a computer tech he felt inferior to a medical researcher but then this woman needed his help to program her miracle medical tech. It could make her millions and be revolutionary but she wasn’t going to give him credit. He was just an unpaid worker. It will be exposed that the groom stole and abused her nanotech research and might be able to expose his theft and misuse of the product.

– How: The friend is shielding the bride so he programs her to not speak to protect his secret and then he uses his increased power to snap her neck

• Character Death 5: the tattoo shop owner

– Why: He is shielding the bride. He was complicit in administering the nanotech in the tattoo ink and might eventually figure out that the doctored ink was the cause the allergic reaction that killed the best friend

– How: The groom tortures the guy first by pinning him in a chair and scraping him with needles/wrapping a cord around his neck and eventually uses the machine motor to electrocute him.

• Character Death 6: random person who tries to stop him

– Why: The person tries to stop him and a derangement has overcome his senses.

– How: TBD – gruesome thoughts in motion!!

• This reply was modified 2 months, 4 weeks ago by  Pam Ewing.