Lesson 10

[David Wickenden]

David Wickenden – Fascinating Scenes Outline
Assignment #10 – Fascinating Scenes
Vision: I become a writer that the industry respects and wants to work with and it offers me challenges that helps me to continue to grow and be successful.
“What I learned from doing this assignment is…?”
By playing with the interest techniques, you can really turn the story on its head.
• State: I love discovering…
• Activity: …interesting ways to write scenes through Interest Techniques!

Act 1: Magic is Scary
1. INT. BASEMENT OF HOME – NIGHT
• Scene Arc – A child, Eliza, experiments with magic alone in the basement. The magic gets away from her and her mother disappears through a magical portal.
• Essence – Eliza accidentally sends her mother to a different dimension.
• Conflict – The magic is too strong for Eliza to control.
• Subtext – She is not suppose to be playing with magic.
• Hope/fear – She’ll create something wonderful/the magic will hurt her.

• Beginning: Mystery
• Middle: Surprise
• Ending: Uncertainty

SETUP 1 & 4: Eliza PJ 1: A child, (Eliza Blackwood), is playing with magic. Her mother enters the room, and the magic gets away from Eliza and her mother is flung into a different realm.
2. INT/EXT – CAR – DAY
• Scene Arc – The Blackwood children are driving to an estate that they have inherited.
• Essence – Introduction of the characters and their world.
• Conflict – Eliza is at odds with anything that cannot be explained through logic or facts.
• Subtext – Gabriel and Lenore are annoyed with Eliza’s negativity.
• Hope/fear – Hope they can get along/Fear that this might cause them to separate the siblings.

• Beginning: More interesting setting
• Middle: Character changes radically
• Ending: Uncomfortable Moment

Eliza PJ 2: Years later, Eliza, her sister Elenor, and brother, Gabriel, journey to an ancient family estate that they have inherited.
Character Action: Eliza refuses to believe in magic and become hostile and argumentative with her siblings.
Emotional Dilemma:
• Moment: Eliza’s hostility towards her siblings.
• How it plays out: Eliza’s refusal to believe in magic causes friction with her siblings, especially when they express their fears and concerns. Her aggressive skepticism creates tension, leaving her siblings feeling isolated and misunderstood. This sets up Eliza’s internal conflict and the emotional distance she must overcome.
3. INT. BLACKWOOD MANSION – DAY
• Scene Arc – They are attacked by ghosts and rescued by Silas, the caretaker.
• Essence – First encounter with the ghosts.
• Conflict – physical attack
• Subtext – Silas is not who he appears to be.
• Hope/fear – that the siblings will be safe/that the siblings might get hurt or die.

• Beginning: Major Twist
• Middle: Surprise
• Ending: Uncertainty

SETUP 3: Inciting Incident: The siblings enter the mansion, only to be attacked by a swarm of ghosts.
Character Action: Eliza is dumbfounded when she witnesses the ghosts and Silas attacking each other using magic.
1. Surprise:
• Moment: Eliza witnesses ghosts for the first time.
• How it plays out: After entering the mansion, Eliza and her siblings are attacked by a swarm of ghosts. Eliza, who has been staunchly denying the existence of magic, is paralyzed with shock as she sees the spectral entities. This moment shatters her skepticism and sets the stage for her journey into the supernatural.
Silas AJ 1: Silas and his followers appear and help the siblings fight back against the ghosts.
Bonding:
• Moment: Silas helps the siblings fend off the ghosts.
• How it plays out: In the midst of the ghost attack, Silas and his followers arrive and use their magic to protect the siblings. As Silas reassures them, claiming his family has always protected the Blackwoods, a moment of bonding occurs. The siblings feel a sense of gratitude and trust towards Silas, unaware of his true intentions.
Distress:
• Moment: Memories of her mother’s disappearance resurface.
• How it plays out: After the ghost attack, the siblings discuss their past and the inheritance. Eliza’s siblings mention their mother’s mysterious disappearance, triggering distressing flashbacks for Eliza. She is visibly shaken, though she tries to hide it, hinting at deeper trauma and unresolved issues.
Character Action: Silas uses his charm to disarm the siblings all the while setting them up to be sacrificed.
SETUP 2: Silas AJ2: Silas promises to protect the siblings, as his family has always protected the Blackwood family.
Deeper Layer: Silas is not truthful, but is after the power of the ghosts, which were witches murdered in the 1700s by his ancestors.
Turning Point: The Blackwoods agree to help the cult, unaware of the true depth of Silas’s plans and the prophecy involving their bloodline.
4. INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT
• Scene Arc – Elenor asleep. Ghost appears and puts a finger to Elenor’s head and Elenor has a nightmare.
• Essence – Elenor’s nightmare.
• Conflict – Fear
• Subtext – None.
• Hope/fear – Fear of a dream

• Beginning: Intrigue
• Middle: Reveal
• Ending: Cliffhanger

EXT. DREAM – NIGHT
• Scene Arc – We watch as women are burnt at the stake for witchery.
• Essence – A nightmare reveals how women were burned
• Conflict – Fear and hatred for the witches.
• Subtext – They weren’t killed out of fear of evil, but for their powers.
• Hope/fear – That this is a bad dream and nothing else/That this is real.

• Beginning: Mystery
• Middle: Misleading/Reveal
• Ending: Betrayal

Act 2: Searching the past.
Elenor has a vivid nightmare that shows women being burned at the stake. She reveals seeing a large book with an eye on its cover.
5. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
• Scene Arc – The siblings search the library for the book
• Essence – Search for the book
• Conflict – Eliza fights herself over the fact that the ghosts were real.
• Subtext – there is more to Eliza’s fear than meets the eye.
• Hope/fear – the book will have answers/that there is no book.

• Beginning: Mystery
• Middle: Internal Dilemma
• Ending: Uncertainty

The book reveals itself through Eliza.
6. INT- HALLWAY – DAY
• Scene Arc – Eliza follows a floating candle down a hallway to a set of stairs.
• Essence – Eliza is led through the house.
• Conflict – Fear
• Subtext –
• Hope/fear – it reals something/it doesn’t get Eliza killed.

• Beginning: Surprise
• Middle: Internal Dilemma
• Ending: Intrigue

7. INT – STAIRWELL – DAY
8. INT – THIRD FLOOR LOOKOUT ROOM – DAY
• Scene Arc – The candle leads Eliza to a sitting room where she finds the book.
• Essence – Eliza finds the book.
• Conflict – fear.
• Subtext – something is happening that we cannot explain.
• Hope/fear – is the guide being helpful/is the guide bringing Eliza to her doom.

• Beginning: Intrigue
• Middle: Reveal
• Ending: Mystery
9. EXT. LIBRARY _ DAY
• Scene Arc – Eliza explains what she has found to her siblings. Then Margeret reveals Eliza’s role in the disappearance of their mother.
• Essence – Eliza reveals the family history.
• Conflict – The Hawthorns are the enemy, not the ghosts.
• Subtext – they realize their true enemy.
• Hope/fear – they can win/they can lose.

• Beginning: Internal Dilemma
• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment
• Ending: Character changes radically

Eliza PJ 4: Eliza reads the book and sees that it is the history of their family. She reads to learn more.
Excitement:
• Moment: Discovering the family’s magical history.
• How it plays out: Gabriel finds the book with the eye on its cover, and Eliza reads it, uncovering their family’s history. The excitement of piecing together their ancestry and understanding their connection to magic energizes the siblings, fostering a sense of unity and purpose.
REVEAL 3: Deeper Layer: The women were witches and were killed in 1700s. They were of the Blackwood family, killed by the Hawthorne’s who wanted their powers. A ghost, Margaret Blackwood, appears and confirms what Eliza has learned.
Eliza PJ 5: She learns that magic is part of the family legacy, but she refused to accept this.
Major reveal 1: Margaret reveals Eliza’s tampering with magic as a child caught Eliza’s mother and that she has suppressed the memories. Upon hearing of this, the memories overcome Eliza, but she realizes that she has the power of magic.
Trigger their Wounds:
• Moment: Eliza’s suppressed memories come to light.
• How it plays out: As Margaret Blackwood’s ghost reveals the truth about Eliza’s childhood tampering with magic, suppressed memories of her mother’s disappearance flood back. Eliza is overwhelmed with guilt and grief, realizing her role in her mother’s fate. This emotional wound drives her determination to master magic and set things right.

Character Action: Eliza puts aside her disbelief in magic and begins to learn.
Courage:
• Moment: Eliza decides to learn magic.
• How it plays out: Despite her fear and disbelief, Eliza resolves to embrace her magical heritage to protect her siblings. She begins to study the spells and rituals, showing courage and determination. This marks a significant shift in her character, as she starts to accept her power and responsibility.
10. INT. CAVERN – DAY
• Scene Arc – Silas learns that the Blackwood children are aware of his plans. He makes plans to capture Gabriel.
• Essence – Silas is revealed and sets up plans to capture Gabriel.
• Conflict – Silas vs the Blackwood family.
• Subtext – revealed
• Hope/fear – the Blackwood family can overcome/that Silas will win.

• Beginning: Major Twist
• Middle: Betrayal
• Ending: Cliffhanger

Character Action: Silas reveals he true nature.
REVEAL 2: Silas AJ 3: Silas puts plans into place to grab Gabriel as a sacrifice in the coming ceremony to gain supernatural powers.
Betrayal:
• Moment: Silas reveals his true nature.
• How it plays out: Silas’s façade of protection crumbles as he reveals his plan to sacrifice Gabriel for his own gain. The siblings feel a deep sense of betrayal, realizing they have been manipulated. This betrayal fuels their resolve to fight against Silas and protect each other.
Act 3: Fast learner
11. INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT
• Scene Arc – Eliza works at learning enough magic to protect herself and her siblings against Silas.
• Essence – Skill learning.
• Conflict – overcoming her previous bias.
• Subtext – fear of failure.
• Hope/fear – She is becoming powerful/will she be powerful enough?

• Beginning: Internal Dilemma
• Middle: Suspense
• Ending: Uncertainty

Eliza PJ 6: Using the book, and with the help of the ghost, Eliza familiarizes herself with magic, but does not trust in herself.
EXT. GARDEN MORNING
• Scene Arc – Eliza challenged Silas and he immediately attacks her. She doesn’t do a blood sacrifice and she’s defeated and forced to flee.
• Essence – Eliza takes on Silas and loses.
• Conflict – Magic fight Eliza vs Silas.
• Subtext – Good vs evil.
• Hope/fear – She can win/she loses.

• Beginning: Betrayal
• Middle: Reveal
• Ending: Uncertainty

She also does not offer a blood sacrifice. This allows Silas to overcome her.
Distress:
• Moment: Eliza’s initial failure with magic.
• How it plays out: Eliza attempts to confront Silas with newly learned spells but fails because she does not offer a blood sacrifice. Silas’s attack forces her to flee, leaving her feeling inadequate and desperate. This failure amplifies her doubts and fear of losing her siblings.
Character Action: Silas attacks and when he is unable to finish Eliza, he escapes in a rage.
Character Action: Eliza attempts to confront Silas with magic, but fails.
Character Action: Silas doesn’t give up. Moves on to the next sibling.
12. INT. GABRIEL’S BEDROOM – MORNING
• Scene Arc – Knowing his secret is out, Silas makes the bold move and captures Gabriel.
• Essence – Silas grabs a hostage.
• Conflict – Captive.
• Subtext – Gabriel doesn’t know Silas has attacked his sister.
• Hope/fear – Gabriel can get free/Silas will sacrifice Gabriel.

• Beginning: Suspense
• Middle: Character changes radically
• Ending: Cliffhanger

Silas AJ 4: Silas and his members grab Gabriel.
Sacrifice:
• Moment: Silas captures Gabriel.
• How it plays out: Silas and his followers overpower Gabriel and take him captive for the upcoming sacrifice. Eliza and Elenor’s desperation and fear for their brother’s life heighten the stakes, pushing Eliza to further embrace her magical abilities.
13. INT/EXT – ESTATE – DAY
• Scene Arc – Eliza and Elenor search for Gabriel throughout the estate. When they separate to cover more ground, Elenor is captured.
• Essence – Search for Gabriel gets Elenor captured.
• Conflict – hunting for Gabriel.
• Subtext – Is he dead?
• Hope/fear – Will they find him/Is he dead already?

• Beginning: Suspense
• Middle: Misinterpretation
• Ending: Surprise

Eliza PJ 7: With Elenor, Eliza searches for her brother.
Silas AJ 5: When the sisters get separated, Silas grabs Elenor.
14. INT. UPPER READING ROOM – DAY
• Scene Arc – In the upper reading room, Eliza spies two cult members dragging Elenor away. She’s alone
• Essence – Eliza is alone.
• Conflict – They have both Gabriel and Elenor
• Subtext – Will Silas sacrifice both of them?
• Hope/fear – She is alive/Is she dead?

• Beginning: External Dilemma
• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment
• Ending: Major Twist

Eliza AJ 5: Realizing that she is alone, Eliza becomes determined to fight back.
Courage:
• Moment: Eliza’s resolve to fight back.
• How it plays out: Realizing that she must save her siblings alone, Eliza steels herself for the final confrontation. She pushes past her fear and doubt, determined to harness her magic to defeat Silas. This moment of courage solidifies her transformation from skeptic to protector.
15. EXT. KILLING GROUND – NIGHT
• Scene Arc – With the Ghosts on her side, Eliza takes the fight to Silas to save her siblings. She preforms the blood sacrifice and it gives her the power to beat the cult. When he tries to kill Gabriel, Eliza draws more power and a portal opens up revealing her mother who shares the combined power of the dead witches that allows Eliza to throw Silas into an alternate dimension.
• Essence – The climax
• Conflict – Final Battle between good and evil.
• Subtext – NONE
• Hope/fear – That Eliza will win/That she might fail.

• Beginning: Character changes radically
• Middle: Cliffhanger
• Ending: Intrigue

Act 4: The Battle
Silas AJ 6: As the clock approaches midnight, Silas and the cult gather to sacrifice the two captured siblings.
Character Action: Silas shows his ruthlessness as he plans on sacrificing the siblings to further his quest for power.
Character Action: Eliza does everything she can to gain the power to defeat Silas and rescue her siblings.
Eliza PJ 6: Eliza at Margaret’s urging, cuts herself so that the blood is spilt and offered for the power she needs.
Emotional Dilemma:
• Moment: Choosing to spill her own blood.
• How it plays out: Eliza faces a moral dilemma when she realizes that to gain enough power to fight Silas, she must offer her own blood. The decision to harm herself for the greater good is a poignant moment, highlighting her selflessness and dedication to her family.
Excitement:
• Moment: Eliza gains the power of her ancestors.
• How it plays out: With her blood offered, Eliza feels an immense surge of power as the ghosts of her ancestors lend her their strength. This exhilarating moment boosts her confidence and prepares her for the final battle against Silas.
Eliza PJ 7: Eliza, with the help of the ghosts, attack the cult members. She is not strong enough and watches in horror as Silas raises the knife to kill her brother.
Silas AJ 7: Silas is at the finish line, ready to gain all the supernatural power for himself.
Distress:
• Moment: Silas prepares to sacrifice Gabriel.
• How it plays out: As Silas stands ready to kill Gabriel, Eliza watches in horror, feeling helpless and desperate. This moment of intense distress underscores the high stakes and the urgency of her mission.
Character Action: Eliza refuses to give up and fights Silas with all her might.
Reveal 4: Turning point: As Eliza reaches for more power, a portal opens up. Through the portal, her mother appears and feeds her the combined power of the witches.
Surprise:
• Moment: The portal opens and Eliza’s mother appears.
• How it plays out: Just as all seems lost, a portal opens, and Eliza’s mother reaches through, transferring the combined power of the witches to Eliza. This surprising and emotional reunion empowers Eliza and provides the strength needed to defeat Silas.
Eliza PJ 8: Eliza, with the added power, uses it to fling Silas into another void, before he can sacrifice her brother. She easily finishes off the other cult members. SETUP 5: As she relaxes, the portal with her mother closes her mother off from her.
Success/Winning:
• Moment: Eliza defeats Silas and frees the ghosts.
• How it plays out: With the added power, Eliza flings Silas into a void and defeats the cult members. The ghosts, including Margaret, express gratitude and move on to the afterlife. The victory is bittersweet as Eliza realizes her mother is still trapped in another realm, but she is now empowered and ready to rescue her. The siblings embrace, their bond stronger than ever, and their powers awakened.
By incorporating these emotional moments, the screenplay will create a powerful and engaging narrative that deeply resonates with the audience, enhancing the horror/thriller elements with rich, character-driven drama.
Character Action: Silas refuses to accept defeat and vows to return.
Reveal: Having gained the witch’s power into herself and broken the curse, Margaret and the other ghosts are free to enter the afterlife and disappear after a tearful farewell.
Character Action: Eliza, now empowered, prepares to move forward to rescue her mother. She is unstoppable.
REVEAL 5: Resolution: Eliza rescues her siblings. As they embrace, the powers flow through all three of them, awaking the latent powers. Eliza tells them that knowing that their mother is still alive somewhere in a different realm, they must work towards rescuing her.

• This reply was modified 11 months, 1 week ago by  David Wickenden.

[LJ (Lawrence John) Seliski]

LJ’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!

My vision is to write incredible high-concept screenplays that are made into popular, financially successful movies.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how each of the Lessons in Module 4 has resulted in me being prepared to start writing an incredible outline.

Genre = Sci-Fi
Title = Defiant Allies
Concept = An eighteen-year-old woman who was abused as a foster child rescues a gifted, exiled alien twelve-year-old Princess, and agrees to help her avoid capture by the Princess’s twenty-four-year-old identical twin sister, an adversary who wants to misuse the Princess’s gift and is involved in a conspiracy that threatens both humanity and alien kind.

Scene 1: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Mia, Gina, and Brett stand near the door of the home. Claire and Rosie run up to Mia, begging her not to leave (External Dilemma).
Middle: Mia hugs the girls and explains she must leave because she's an adult now. Flashback to Gina abusing the girls while Mia shields them (Uncomfortable Moment).
Ending: Gina angrily orders the girls to chores, gives Mia twenty dollars as a "parting gift," and Brett rolls his eyes. Mia leaves the foster home (Misinterpretation).

Scene 2: EXT. DYSTOPIAN STREET – DAY
Beginning: Mia walks down a street filled with robots performing various jobs (More interesting setting).
Middle: Mia enters a restaurant looking for work but exits dejected. She notices a hover van where Duke and Josh struggle with Ariael (Intrigue).
Ending: Mia uses her biomechanical arm and martial arts skills to free Ariael from the men. Zarael orders them back into the van and flies away. Ariael buys Mia food to show appreciation (Surprise).

Scene 3: INT. HOVER VAN – DAY
Beginning: Zarael shouts at and criticizes Duke and Josh (Superior Position).
Middle: The men are stunned when Zarael suddenly becomes soft-spoken, asking if they were hurt during the altercation (Mislead / Reveal).
Ending: Duke and Josh exchange confused glances, unsure of Zarael's true nature.

Scene 4: EXT. ALLEY – DAY
Beginning: Mia and Ariael sit on boxes, discussing the recent events while Mia eats (Uncertainty).
Middle: Ariael reveals that Zarael is from her country and killed her security guards. She offers Mia a job as her assistant (Secret).
Ending: Mia accepts the job, suggesting the foster home as a possible safe place to stay.

Scene 5: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Gina agrees to let Mia and Ariael stay for a high monthly payment (External Dilemma).
Middle: Claire and Rosie giggle while scrubbing the kitchen floor, prompting Gina to strap them. Ariael criticizes Gina (Uncomfortable Moment).
Ending: Mia ushers Ariael to her former bedroom, worried about the situation (Suspense).

Scene 6: INT. MIA'S BEDROOM – DAY
Beginning: Ariael insists on having her own bedroom due to her status as a princess (Character changes radically).
Middle: Mia explains the lack of space and suggests making do with what they have.
Ending: Ariael decides to take a bath to think over the situation.

Scene 7: INT. WASHROOM – DAY
Beginning: Ariael removes her wig, revealing her white hair, and relaxes in the bathtub (Intrigue).
Middle: Gina bursts in with a strap, threatening Ariael for speaking out (Cliffhanger).
Ending: Ariael turns Gina into a white mouse and threatens to flush her down the toilet unless she agrees to sell the foster home (Major twist).

Scene 8: INT. MIA'S BEDROOM – DAY
Beginning: Ariael informs Mia about the deal she made with Gina (Surprise).
Middle: Ariael offers to make Mia and Brett co-owners of the foster home.
Ending: Mia is stunned but begins to see a glimmer of hope.

Scene 9: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Ariael prepares all the necessary legal documents for the sale (Superior Position).
Middle: Gina hurriedly signs the papers and leaves, taking the money. Ariael announces Mia and Brett as the new owners.
Ending: Ariael promises to pay for a housekeeper, giving Mia a sense of control and stability (Resolution).

Scene 10: INT. ARIAEL'S BEDROOM – DAY
Beginning: Mia helps Ariael settle into her new room (More interesting setting).
Middle: Ariael decorates the room using her powers, creating an alien ambiance.
Ending: Mia is both amazed and intimidated by Ariael's abilities, deepening her sense of responsibility.

Scene 11: INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: Zarael angrily updates Dugan about the failed capture (External Dilemma).
Middle: She provides him with Ariael's picture and instructs him to inform his allies (Mislead / Reveal).
Ending: Zarael emphasizes the importance of capturing Ariael alive for their plans (Suspense).

Scene 12: EXT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Mia tells Claire and Rosie about the new ownership (Intrigue).
Middle: The girls are excited and hopeful about the future. Mia and Ariael leave to visit Brett (More interesting setting).
Ending: Mia reflects on her trust in Brett, hoping he can help them.

Scene 13: INT. BRETT'S WORKSHOP – DAY
Beginning: Brett's workshop is filled with advanced technology and a training area (More interesting setting).
Middle: Mia introduces Ariael to Brett and explains her situation. They demonstrate martial arts skills (Surprise).
Ending: Ariael, though impressed, insists on focusing on immediate threats, noting time is critical (Uncertainty).

Scene 14: EXT. ROBOT MUSEUM – DAY
Beginning: Mia and Ariael head to Ariael's financial institution, passing a robot museum (More interesting setting).
Middle: They evade Duke and Josh by transforming into ancient robots (Mystery).
Ending: Safe for the moment, they continue to the bank.

Scene 15: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Mia and Ariael, having narrowly escaped danger, are recovering. Ariael prepares to reveal her true identity. (Interest Technique: Suspense)
Middle: Ariael tells Mia she is an alien princess and explains her unique gift. Mia reacts with shock and curiosity. (Interest Technique: Major Twist)
Ending: Mia grapples with the reality of Ariael’s revelation, unsure of what to believe. (Interest Technique: Uncertainty)

Scene 16: EXT. ARIAEL’S PLANET – DAY
Beginning: Ariael takes Mia through an energy vortex, transporting them to her home planet. (Interest Technique: More Interesting Setting)
Middle: Ariael introduces Mia to the Grounders and Floaters, her allies who explain their struggle. (Interest Technique: Superior Position)
Ending: Mia is amazed by the alien world and the responsibilities Ariael carries, feeling a new sense of purpose. (Interest Technique: Intrigue)

Scene 17: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Mia and Ariael return to Earth. Mia reflects on what she has seen and heard. (Interest Technique: Internal Dilemma)
Middle: Mia decides to trust Ariael and vows to fight with her against Zarael. (Interest Technique: Character changes radically)
Ending: They prepare for the challenges ahead, solidifying their partnership. (Interest Technique: Suspense)

Scene 18: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: Ariael runs out of cash, causing tension. Mia feels betrayed and considers quitting. (Interest Technique: Betrayal)
Middle: Ariael promises to get money from her bank, explaining the difficulties she's facing. (Interest Technique: Uncomfortable Moment)
Ending: They agree to a risky plan to obtain the funds, showcasing the strain on their alliance. (Interest Technique: External Dilemma)

Scene 19 INT. ZARAEL’S CUBICLE – EVENING
Beginning: Zarael is seen struggling with her split personality, torn between revenge and pity for Ariael. (Interest Technique: Internal Dilemma)
Middle: Her conflicting emotions are evident as she debates her next move against Ariael. (Interest Technique: Mislead / Reveal)
Ending: Zarael’s unstable mental state heightens the danger she poses. (Interest Technique: Cliffhanger)

Scene 20: INT. ARIAEL’S BEDROOM – DAY
Beginning: Ariael and Mia plan their disguise to safely access Ariael’s financial institution. (Interest Technique: Mystery)
Middle: Ariael transforms into a baby, and Mia into a robot nanny. They rehearse their roles. (Interest Technique: Surprise)
Ending: Ready for the mission, they head towards the financial institution. (Interest Technique: Suspense)

Scene 21: EXT. FINANCIAL INSTITUTION – DAY
Beginning: Before entering, they overhear Duke and Josh discussing Zarael's instability. (Interest Technique: Superior Position)
Middle: Mia and Ariael realize the depth of Zarael's mental issues, increasing their concern. (Interest Technique: Misinterpretation)
Ending: They enter the building, more cautious and determined. (Interest Technique: Suspense)

Scene 22: INT. FINANCIAL INSTITUTION – DAY
Beginning: Ariael and Mia revert to their normal appearances to approach an important robot manager. (Interest Technique: Uncertainty)
Middle: Ariael successfully obtains the requested finances. (Interest Technique: Superior Position)
Ending: They transform back into the nanny and baby before leaving the building. (Interest Technique: Intrigue)

Scene 23: EXT. FINANCIAL INSTITUTION – DAY
Beginning: Outside, they overhear Duke planning to update Tyrell and Zarael. (Interest Technique: Superior Position)
Middle: Mia and Ariael decide to follow Duke to gather more information. (Interest Technique: Suspense)
Ending: They tail Duke discreetly, leading them to a warehouse. (Interest Technique: Mystery)

Scene 24: EXT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: Ariael and Mia observe Duke entering the warehouse, trying to remain unseen. (Interest Technique: Suspense)
Middle: They discuss their next move, weighing the risks. (Interest Technique: External Dilemma)
Ending: Deciding to investigate further, they prepare to enter the warehouse. (Interest Technique: Cliffhanger)

Scene 25: EXT. ALLEY – DAY
Beginning: Ariael and Mia transform into pigeons to infiltrate the warehouse. (Interest Technique: Surprise)
Middle: They fly into an open window, cautiously observing the scene inside. (Interest Technique: Intrigue)
Ending: Inside, they witness something shocking related to Zarael's plans. (Interest Technique: Major Twist)

Scene 26: INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: The warehouse sprawls with shadows, an ominous setting for the clandestine meeting between Tyrell and Zarael. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting) Pigeons flutter overhead, unnoticed observers of the unfolding events.
Middle: Zarael, perceiving Ariael's potential threat to her own freedom, reluctantly aligns with Tyrell's ruthless plan to eliminate her twin sister. (TWIST – Mislead/Reveal)
Ending: With a chilling resolve, Zarael decides that Ariael must be eliminated to secure her own safety, setting a dangerous course of action in motion. (CHARACTER – Betrayal)

Scene 27: INT. ARIAEL’S BEDROOM – EVENING
Beginning: In the intimacy of Ariael's sanctuary, the tension rises as she reveals her connection to Zarael and the dire consequences of their inevitable confrontation. (BIG PICTURE – Superior Position)
Middle: Ariael entrusts Mia with a device crucial to their survival, deepening their bond of friendship and mutual trust amid looming danger. (CHARACTER – Internal Dilemma)
Ending: As Mia commits to aiding Ariael in her time of need, they forge a pact that will test their resilience and determination in the face of impending peril. (CHARACTER – Uncomfortable Moment)

Scene 28: INT. BRETT’S WORKSHOP – DAY
Beginning: Mia grapples with newfound admiration for Ariael as they reflect on her selflessness and impact on their lives, against the backdrop of Brett's cluttered workshop. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: Ariael embraces her duty as a future leader, acknowledging her responsibilities to both her people and her newfound allies, solidifying her resolve. (CHARACTER – Character changes radically)
Ending: With a shared determination, Ariael and Mia prepare to confront the looming threat posed by Zarael and Tyrell, setting the stage for a showdown. (TWIST – Major twist)

Scene 29: INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: Disguised amidst the shadows, Ariael and Mia eavesdrop on Tyrell and Zarael's sinister alliance, their presence unnoticed amid the chaos. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: Zarael's escalating desperation leads to a shocking revelation as she conspires with Tyrell to obtain a devastating weapon, heightening the stakes. (TWIST – Surprise)
Ending: Ariael and Mia are left reeling from the revelation of Zarael's ruthless intentions, forced to confront the dire threat posed by their relentless adversary. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 30: INT. ARIAEL’S BEDROOM – EVENING
Beginning: In the sanctuary of Ariael's chamber, the weight of Zarael's treachery hangs heavy as Ariael and Mia grapple with the enormity of their predicament. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: With resolve born of desperation, Ariael and Mia hatch a daring plan to expose Zarael's machinations to the world, risking everything in a bid for salvation. (TWIST – Mislead/Reveal)
Ending: Mia reluctantly agrees to a dangerous transformation, setting the stage for a daring infiltration that could spell victory or doom. (CHARACTER – Uncomfortable Moment)

Scene 31: INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: Disguised amidst the shadows, Mia embarks on a perilous mission to uncover Zarael and Tyrell's treachery, her fate hanging in the balance. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: As Mia covertly gathers incriminating evidence, the tension mounts as Zarael and Tyrell's sinister plans unfold before her eyes. (TWIST – Mislead/Reveal)
Ending: With damning evidence in hand, Mia risks everything to expose Zarael's betrayal, setting the stage for a dramatic showdown. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 32: INT. BRETT’S WORKSHOP – EVENING
Beginning: In Brett's makeshift sanctuary, Ariael and Mia present their damning evidence to their unlikely ally, setting the stage for a daring gambit to turn the tide. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: Brett, driven by a sense of duty and justice, vows to take their evidence to the highest authorities, setting the stage for a final confrontation. (CHARACTER – Character changes radically)
Ending: With Brett's assistance, Ariael and Mia set their plan into motion, racing against time to thwart Zarael's sinister ambitions. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 33: INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: Gina's bitter betrayal sends shockwaves through the ranks of Ariael and Mia's allies, setting the stage for a final showdown with Zarael and her minions. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: As Zarael's forces close in, Ariael and Mia find themselves trapped in a deadly game of cat and mouse, their survival hanging in the balance. (TWIST – Cliffhanger)
Ending: With Ariael captured and Mia held at bay, the stage is set for a climactic showdown that will determine the fate of worlds. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 34: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: In the familiar surroundings of the foster home, the arrival of government agents heralds a sudden shift in fortunes, setting the stage for a dramatic resolution. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: As Tyrell is apprehended for his treachery, the balance of power shifts, setting the stage for a final confrontation between Ariael and Zarael. (TWIST – Major twist)
Ending: With Tyrell's arrest, the tide turns in favor of Ariael and Mia, setting the stage for a climactic showdown that will determine the fate of worlds. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 35: INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Beginning: As Zarael and her minions prepare to make their escape, the arrival of government agents shatters their plans, setting the stage for a final showdown. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: With Tyrell's arrest, Zarael's grip on power begins to slip, setting the stage for a climactic confrontation with Ariael and Mia. (TWIST – Cliffhanger)
Ending: With the balance of power in flux, Ariael and Mia confront Zarael in a high-stakes showdown that will determine the fate of worlds. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 36: INT. HOVER VAN – DAY
Beginning: As Zarael and her captives make their escape, a startling revelation on a floating news billboard threatens to unravel her plans, setting the stage for a dramatic climax. (BIG PICTURE – More interesting setting)
Middle: With her treachery exposed to the world, Zarael is forced to confront the consequences of her actions, setting the stage for a final showdown with Ariael. (TWIST – Major twist)
Ending: As Zarael and her captives race towards an uncertain fate, the stage is set for a climactic showdown that will determine the fate of worlds. (ANTICIPATION – Suspense)

Scene 37: INT. ZARAEL’S CUBICLE – EVENING
Beginning: (Anticipation – Uncertainty) Zarael hastily gathers her belongings in her cubicle, a sense of urgency palpable in the air as she prepares to depart for her planet through an energy vortex, evading capture on Earth.
Middle: (Twist – Major twist) Ariael, accompanying Zarael, shares a glance laden with hidden meaning, hinting at an unexpected turn of events as they vanish through the vortex, leaving behind a trail of uncertainty and intrigue.
Ending: (Character – Uncomfortable Moment) The tension dissipates momentarily as the scene shifts to a quiet calm, leaving the audience with a lingering discomfort, wondering about the true intentions behind Zarael and Ariael's departure and what consequences it may hold for Mia and her allies.

Scene 38: INT. FOSTER HOME – DAY
Beginning: (Big Picture – More interesting setting) The Foster Home, once a place of solace, now exudes an aura of foreboding as the housekeeper returns, discovering the aftermath of Zarael's visit, setting the stage for the emotional turmoil to come.
Middle: (Character – Internal Dilemma) Mia grapples with her sense of failure and despair, her internal conflict laid bare as she contemplates the daunting task of rescuing Ariael from the clutches of Zarael, highlighting the depth of her commitment to her newfound ally.
Ending: (Character – Uncomfortable Moment) Duke and Josh's unexpected apology injects a moment of discomfort into the scene, blurring the lines between friend and foe, leaving Mia and the audience questioning the complexities of loyalty and redemption.

Scene 39: INT. BRETT’S WORKSHOP – EVENING
Beginning: (Character – Betrayal) Mia confides in Brett, revealing her promise to Ariael and her determination to rescue her, setting the stage for a risky and potentially treacherous mission to Ariael's planet.
Middle: (Big Picture – More interesting setting) The workshop becomes a hub of activity as Mia prepares to embark on her journey, the air crackling with anticipation as she harnesses the power of the energy vortex to travel to Ariael's planet, signaling a pivotal moment in her quest.
Ending: (Twist – Cliffhanger) As Mia disappears into the vortex, uncertainty looms over her fate, leaving Brett and the audience on edge, wondering what challenges await her on Ariael's planet and whether she will emerge victorious in her mission.

Scene 40: EXT. ARIAEL’S PLANET – DAY
Beginning: (Anticipation – Suspense) Mia arrives on Ariael's planet, greeted by the unfamiliar sights and sounds of an alien world, heightening the sense of suspense as she begins to coordinate with Ariael's allies to rescue her from captivity.
Middle: (Twist – Mislead/Reveal) The revelation of Ariael's dire situation deepens the stakes, as Mia and the audience are misled into believing that a direct confrontation may be necessary, only to discover a surprising twist as Mia devises a different plan of action.
Ending: (Character – Internal Dilemma) Mia's decision to seek counsel from Brett highlights her internal struggle with the weight of responsibility, underscoring her commitment to finding a solution that balances pragmatism with empathy, leaving the audience on tenterhooks as they await the next development.

Scene 41: INT. BRETT’S WORKSHOP – DAY
Beginning: (Character – Uncomfortable Moment) Mia confides in Brett, sharing the details of Ariael's predicament and their plan to rescue her, laying bare her vulnerability and uncertainty as she grapples with the enormity of the task ahead.
Middle: (Twist – Major twist) Brett's ingenious creation of stink bombs injects a surprising twist into the scene, transforming what seemed like a hopeless situation into a glimmer of hope, as Mia prepares to deploy them in a daring attempt to turn the tide in their favor.
Ending: (Character – Betrayal) The scene concludes with Mia's departure for Ariael's planet, leaving Brett behind with a heavy heart, as the weight of their shared burden and the uncertainty of their future loom large, foreshadowing the challenges that lie ahead for both of them.

Scene 42: EXT. ARIAEL’S PLANET – DAY
Climax
Beginning (Anticipation – Intrigue): The scene opens with a breathtaking panoramic shot of Ariael's lush, otherworldly planet bathed in the soft glow of its twin suns. The setting is more captivating than ever, with vibrant alien flora dotting the landscape and exotic creatures flitting about.
Middle (Interest Technique: Twist – Major Twist): In a heart-pounding sequence, Mia and her allies unleash Brett's ingeniously crafted stink bombs, causing chaos among Zarael's forces. The unexpected twist catches Zarael off guard, throwing her meticulously laid plans into disarray and granting Mia and her allies the opportunity they need to turn the tide of the battle in their favor.
Ending (Interest Technique: Character – Radical Change): With Zarael's forces defeated and her grand scheme thwarted, Ariael approaches her broken twin sister with a compassion born of wisdom and empathy. In a moment of radical change, Ariael chooses to set aside her animosity and vengeance, opting instead to show mercy to her fallen sibling.
In a poignant conclusion to the scene, Ariael lovingly places Zarael in the care of the planet's psychiatric facility, recognizing the depth of her sister's emotional wounds and offering her a chance at redemption and healing.

Scene 43: INT. THRONE ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Character – Uncomfortable Moment) Mia and Ariael stand before the throne, their bittersweet reunion tinged with a sense of farewell, as Mia grapples with the conflicting emotions of duty and longing, setting the stage for their poignant farewell.
Middle: (Anticipation – Intrigue) Mia's decision to return to Earth adds a layer of intrigue to the scene, leaving the audience wondering about the fate of the Foster Home and Mia's unresolved past, as she bids farewell to Ariael and embarks on a new chapter of her journey.
Ending: (Twist – Cliffhanger) The scene concludes with Mia and Ariael's heartfelt promise to reunite, leaving the audience with a sense of anticipation and uncertainty, as they eagerly await the next installment of their adventure and the resolution of Mia's quest for justice and redemption.

• This reply was modified 11 months ago by  LJ (Lawrence John) Seliski.

[Renee Miller]

Renee’s Fascinating Scene Outline
My Vision: I will be in the top 1% of screenwriters and be known in the industry as an A-list screenwriter who is easy to work with, gets the job done, and never has to worry about the next job.

What I learned from this assignment is how to create fascinating scenes during the outline process that will hook the audience from the first scene until the last.

1. INT. BASEMENT – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) The scene opens with the eerie, meticulous setup of the basement, implying a dark ritual about to unfold.
Middle: (Suspense) The chainsaw buzzes to life, its menacing growl filling the air as it nears the body, building tension about the impending action.
Ending: (Major Twist) The abrupt ringing of the doorbell halts the gruesome act, introducing an unexpected interruption at a critical moment.

2. EXT. HOUSE – DAY
Beginning: (Superior Position) The audience knows the grim context inside the house as the unsuspecting Jehovah's Witnesses wait outside.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Lily, flustered and masking her panic, pretends to embrace the religious conversation, misleading the visitors about her true state.
Ending: (Surprise) She hands them a random pamphlet, hastily trying to get rid of them, which contrasts sharply with the gravity of the situation inside.

3. INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT
Beginning: (Mystery) Marcus sifts through files and clippings, piecing together a puzzle that hints at deep, dark secrets.
Middle: (Uncertainty) He connects the dots between Dr. Thorn’s therapeutic methods and unresolved serial killer cases, suggesting a disturbing overlap.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Marcus finds a particularly incriminating article that shocks him, but before he can react, his toddler barges into the room.

4. INT. OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Dr. Thorn reflects on her past actions and the current ones, highlighting her internal conflict between her old and new selves.
Middle: (Character changes radically) As she records her thoughts, her demeanor shifts from troubled to determined, revealing a deep commitment to change.
Ending: (Uncertainty) She expresses a poignant hope to mend her ways, juxtaposed with a palpable fear that redemption might be out of reach.

5. INT. SECURITY ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (External Dilemma) Dr. Thorn and the groundskeeper review the security feeds, showing different areas of the mansion and emphasizing the extensive surveillance.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) They witness an awkward encounter between two employees, highlighting the invasive nature of the surveillance.
Ending: (Betrayal) Dr. Thorn justifies the spying as necessary for safety, but her expression reveals doubts about violating her group's privacy, hinting at ethical betrayal.

6. INT. KITCHEN – DAY
Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) The scene begins with Dr. Thorn in a brightly lit, cozy kitchen, a stark contrast to her dark past, preparing for the arrival of the group.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) As she arranges the snacks, her rehearsed phrases switch from professional to personal, revealing her genuine concern and desire to change.
Ending: (Intrigue) Dr. Thorn practices a calming technique, hinting at her own need to stay composed under pressure.

7. EXT. DOCK – DAY
Beginning: (Superior Position) Dr. Thorn prepares the welcoming area, but the audience knows the true nature of the upcoming group therapy.
Middle: (External Dilemma) She debates whether to display more personal or professional decor, reflecting her internal conflict about how much of her past self to reveal.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The boat appears in the distance, making Dr. Thorn pause and take a deep breath, unsure of the group’s reception.

8. EXT. FERRY BOAT – DAY
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Felix starts a seemingly innocent conversation, but his intentions are far darker.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Felix’s story gains him sympathy, but the audience knows it’s a fabrication designed to manipulate.
Ending: (Surprise) The listener offers Felix unexpected advice that momentarily throws him off his game, revealing a crack in his façade.

9. EXT. DOCK – LATE AFTERNOON
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Dr. Thorn’s nervous anticipation as she waits for the boat, unsure of how her new group will react.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) She greets each member with a tailored approach, showing her adaptability and depth of understanding of each person’s background.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Felix, an unexpected guest, steps off the boat, catching Dr. Thorn off guard with an unanticipated reaction.

10. EXT. PATH TO HOUSE – LATE AFTERNOON
Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) The scenic path provides a false sense of tranquility, subtly juxtaposed with the underlying tension among the group.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Dr. Thorn points out seemingly benign features, but they subtly hint at the island’s darker history.
Ending: (Major Twist) A sudden storm begins, hastening their steps and mirroring the rising drama among the group.

11. INT. LOUNGE – DAY
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn begins the session with a calm demeanor but quickly adopts a more authoritative tone as she lays down the rules.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) As she collects phones, she internally struggles with her dominance over the group versus her desire to foster trust.
Ending: (Betrayal) A group member quietly resists giving up their phone, hinting at potential future conflicts and secrets they wish to keep.

12. EXT. GARDEN AREA – LATE AFTERNOON
Beginning: (Intrigue) Felix mingles with the group, his smooth demeanor masking his sinister intentions.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) He shares his views on human nature, which seem philosophical but actually align with his hidden agenda.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The confession cam captures his statement, setting up future evidence that may expose his true motives.

13. INT. KITCHEN – DUSK
Beginning: (Suspense) Dr. Thorn walks into the kitchen to find Lily poring over dangerous substances, setting a tense tone.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Lily shares her fear of falling back into old habits, revealing her vulnerable side to Dr. Thorn in a moment of genuine connection.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Lily's confession about her close call with the Jehovah's Witnesses shocks Dr. Thorn, showing her the depth of Lily's internal conflict and her commitment to change.

14. INT. BALLROOM – EVENING
Beginning: (Intrigue) The scene opens with members hesitantly sharing light confessions, but the underlying tension suggests deeper secrets.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Felix uses this opportunity to appear supportive and empathetic, misleading others about his true nature.
Ending: (Major Twist) Felix shares a seemingly innocent confession that subtly hints at his darker past, intriguing the others and deepening his integration into the group.

15. INT. LOUNGE – EVENING
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn initiates the circle with confidence, but her demeanor shifts as she faces personal questions.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Dr. Thorn struggles to maintain her composure and deflects a direct question about her motivations, revealing her discomfort with her past.
Ending: (Suspense) The session ends with lingering doubts among the group members about Dr. Thorn's transparency and true intentions.

16. INT. FOYER – DAY
Beginning: (Surprise) The group discovers the body unexpectedly, causing immediate shock and horror.
Middle: (Superior Position) As the group analyzes the crime scene, the audience knows this murder mimics a past crime, adding a layer of grim irony.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The analytical discussion raises more questions than answers, leaving everyone unsettled and suspicious of each other.

17. EXT. ISLAND PATHS – DAY
Beginning: (Mislead/Reveal) Felix uses the walk as a chance to seem concerned and helpful, masking his true intentions.
Middle: (Intrigue) As he probes for opinions on the murder, his questions are calculated to incite doubt and suspicion subtly.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The walk ends with group members more paranoid and isolated than before, unsure of whom to trust.

18. INT. FOYER – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Dr. Thorn finds an overlooked clue that could potentially crack the case wide open.
Middle: (External Dilemma) She debates whether to share the finding with the group or keep it to herself to control the investigation's direction.
Ending: (Major Twist) She decides to keep the evidence secret, a decision that could backfire, increasing her isolation from the group.

19. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Lily starts her diary entry focused on her personal fears but inadvertently captures something unexpected in the background.
Middle: (Superior Position) The audience sees Felix lurking in the background, unbeknownst to Lily, adding a layer of suspense.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The video diary ends abruptly as Lily turns off the camera, unaware of the crucial evidence she’s recorded.

20. INT. DINING ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) The meal starts with strained politeness, but the atmosphere quickly turns tense.
Middle: (Betrayal) Felix cunningly shifts suspicion towards Marcus, betraying his façade of solidarity.
Ending: (Suspense) Marcus's defensive reaction only deepens the group's suspicions, ending the meal on a note of heightened distrust and paranoia.

21. INT. DR THORN’S OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Dr. Thorn receives the news of the impending storm, adding an external threat to the already tense situation.
Middle: (External Dilemma) She faces the choice of disclosing the storm's severity to the group, risking panic, or keeping it quiet, risking safety.
Ending: (Major Twist) She decides to keep the storm a secret, heightening the stakes as she walks back to the group, hiding her deep concern.

22. INT. THERAPY ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) The group begins the trust-building exercise blindfolded, unaware of the danger that awaits.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) As they navigate the obstacle course, members reveal vulnerabilities and support each other, showing a different side of their personalities.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) They remove their blindfolds to discover a new murder scene, shocking everyone and undoing any trust that was built.

23. INT. THERAPY ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Dr. Thorn starts the one-on-one sessions, determined to uncover the truth.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Each member's story adds layers of complexity, with Dr. Thorn interpreting signs of fear as possible guilt.
Ending: (Suspense) The sessions end with more questions than answers, leaving Dr. Thorn frustrated and suspicious.

24. INT. MARCUS’S ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Felix enters Marcus's room stealthily, searching for anything incriminating.
Middle: (Surprise) He discovers an unexpected item that could link Marcus to the murders.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Felix pockets the item and leaves just as someone else begins to approach the room, his heart racing.

25. INT. MEDICAL ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) The groundskeeper suspects Lily of tampering with medical supplies.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Lily reveals her injury, shifting the groundskeeper’s suspicion to concern.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The interaction ends with the groundskeeper still wary, leaving Lily to nurse her wound alone, hinting at her isolation.

26. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Felix uses his chance encounter with Lily to seed doubts about Marcus.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) He carefully crafts his words to make Marcus appear guilty without outright accusations.
Ending: (Suspense) Lily leaves the conversation disturbed and thoughtful, wondering about the truth.

27. INT. COMMON AREA – NIGHT
Beginning: (Mislead/Reveal) The discovery of Marcus’s belonging near the crime scene seems to confirm suspicions.
Middle: (External Dilemma) Dr. Thorn grapples with whether to confront Marcus directly or gather more evidence.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn decides to observe Marcus silently, her suspicions hardening into resolve.

28. INT. DR. THORN’S OFFICE – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Felix sneaks into Dr. Thorn’s office, looking for anything he can use against her.
Middle: (Major Twist) He finds clippings that detail her dark past, giving him powerful leverage.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Felix leaves with the clippings, smirking as he plans his next move, leaving the audience wondering what he’ll do next.

29. EXT. ISLAND GROUNDS – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Felix casually converses with another group member, subtly dropping hints about Marcus's instability.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) His comments make the other members question Dr. Thorn's effectiveness, suggesting she might be overlooking key details.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The conversation ends with the group member looking concerned, contemplating Felix's words as they walk away, deep in thought.

30. INT. FOYER – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Dr. Thorn discovers a seemingly incriminating item in the foyer, linking it to Marcus.
Middle: (External Dilemma) She struggles with the decision to confront Marcus directly or continue observing him covertly.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) She decides to keep the evidence secret for now, storing it away as she ponders her next steps, heightening the tension.

31. INT. DINING ROOM – NIGHT
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Dinner starts awkwardly with forced small talk, as underlying tensions bubble.
Middle: (Betrayal) Accusations subtly fly across the table, with members eyeing each other suspiciously.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn realizes the depth of the rifts forming, deciding she must take drastic action soon to control the situation.

32. EXT. ISLAND PATHS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Felix carefully alters the scene to set up Marcus, ensuring each detail points to guilt.
Middle: (Surprise) Dr. Thorn nearly catches Felix in the act, forcing him to hide abruptly.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Felix watches from his hiding spot as Dr. Thorn inspects the area, unaware of his close presence, leaving him relieved yet more cautious.

33. INT. THERAPY ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn starts the session with a hopeful tone, aiming for peace and understanding.
Middle: (External Dilemma) As tempers flare and accusations become more pointed, the atmosphere deteriorates rapidly.
Ending: (Major Twist) The session ends abruptly with the realization that Marcus is missing, escalating concerns about his role and safety.

34. EXT. ISLAND GROUNDS – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Felix notices Marcus walking alone toward the gazebo, an opportunity to further his plan.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Felix follows discreetly, planting more misleading evidence along the way.
Ending: (Suspense) Felix watches from a distance as Marcus sits alone, unaware of the trap being set around him.

35. EXT. GAZEBO – DAY
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Group members discuss Marcus’s odd behavior, interpreting his isolation as guilt.
Middle: (Intrigue) Felix stokes these fears with calculated comments, deepening the suspicion against Marcus.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The group becomes more divided, with some feeling pity for Marcus and others convinced of his guilt.

36. INT. VARIOUS LOCATIONS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Marcus, alone with the confession cam, reveals his feelings of confusion and fear, not understanding why he's suspected.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) He wrestles with the decision to confront the group or flee, torn by the unfair suspicions.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) He decides to stay and clear his name, unaware of the danger that awaits him, leaving the audience anxious about his fate.

37. EXT. ISLAND PATH – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Lily walks along the path and notices Marcus sitting alone, his figure shrouded in darkness.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Lily hesitates, interpreting Marcus's solitude as a sign of guilt or despair, wondering if she should approach him.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) She decides to approach, but the scene cuts away just as she takes her first step, leaving the outcome uncertain.

38. INT. DR. THORN’S OFFICE – NIGHT
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Lily, concerned, rushes to inform Dr. Thorn about Marcus, showing her proactive side.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Dr. Thorn must decide whether to confront Marcus alone or involve others, weighing the risks of each option.
Ending: (Major Twist) Dr. Thorn decides to confront him alone, a decision that could lead to a dangerous confrontation.

39. INT. SECURITY ROOM – NIGHT
Beginning: (Surprise) While reviewing footage, they unexpectedly spot a shadowy figure following Marcus.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Lily points out the figure’s resemblance to Felix, planting seeds of doubt about Marcus's guilt.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Dr. Thorn is left pondering the new information, unsure of Felix's role in the events.

40. EXT. GAZEBO – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Dr. Thorn approaches the gazebo with trepidation, bracing herself for what she might find.
Middle: (Major Twist) She discovers Marcus's body, staged dramatically, a clear message from the killer.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Dr. Thorn is overwhelmed with emotions, fear, and anger, setting the stage for a final showdown.

41. EXT. GAZEBO – CONTINUOUS
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn's guilt and horror transform her from a figure of authority to one of vulnerability.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) She struggles with her feelings of responsibility for Marcus's death and the fear that she might be next.
Ending: (Uncertainty) As the group gathers, their varied reactions create a tense uncertainty about who can be trusted.

42. EXT. GAZEBO – LATER
Beginning: (Intrigue) The group examines the crime scene, each member contributing their theories.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn takes control, announcing new security measures and more invasive tactics.
Ending: (Major Twist) Her announcement is met with mixed reactions, some supportive, others deeply suspicious of her motives.

43. INT. DR. THORN’S OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Dr. Thorn questions her methods and the path she has taken, feeling the weight of her decisions.
Middle: (Betrayal) Lily confronts Dr. Thorn, accusing her of being too controlling and possibly exacerbating the situation.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Dr. Thorn is left to consider Lily's accusations, doubting herself and her control over the group.

44. EXT. ISLAND GROUNDS – DAY
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Felix participates in the trust activities, seemingly engaging positively.
Middle: (Intrigue) Behind his cooperative facade, Felix whispers doubts and stokes fears among the members.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The session ends with increased tension, members more divided than before, unsure of whom to trust.

45. INT. DINING ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) The group tries to engage in normal breakfast conversation, but the tension is palpable.
Middle: (Major Twist) A member suddenly collapses, revealing they've been poisoned, mirroring their own method.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The group is thrown into chaos, with accusations flying as they realize the killer is still actively targeting them.

46. INT. SECURITY ROOM – NIGHT
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn, once reactive, now takes a determined and proactive stance, overhauling the security system.
Middle: (External Dilemma) She debates the ethics of her actions, wondering if more surveillance and control truly equate to safety or if they breed more distrust.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Dr. Thorn activates the new system, unsure if her methods will protect or provoke her vulnerable group.

47. INT. GREAT ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Dr. Thorn convenes a meeting, turning the great room into a central hub for investigation, showing her leadership.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) As they discuss the data, misunderstandings and misinterpretations of the evidence lead to false leads and frustrations.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The session concludes with more tension than before, as trust diminishes under the weight of unsolved questions.

48. INT. DINING HALL – LATER
Beginning: (Suspense) Members cautiously share observations about the murder patterns, trying to find connections.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) One member proposes a theory that suggests an outsider might be involved, shifting the focus and causing others to reconsider their suspicions.
Ending: (Major Twist) A revelation about a previously overlooked detail regarding the first murder reshapes their understanding of the killer’s motives.

49. INT. LIBRARY – EVENING
Beginning: (Superior Position) Teams scour through footage with the audience aware of Felix's manipulations, adding a layer of dramatic irony.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) As they analyze the videos, members discover discrepancies that point to possible framing or manipulation by someone within the group.
Ending: (Uncertainty) The review session ends with members more suspicious of each other than ever, clouding the investigation with doubt.

50. EXT. GROUNDS – DAY
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn encourages cooperation and trust, urging members to work together despite their fears.
Middle: (External Dilemma) As the storm builds, so does the tension among pairs, with mistrust and the harsh weather complicating the search.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The storm breaks, forcing everyone inside prematurely, leaving questions unanswered and potential evidence undiscovered.

51. INT. GREAT ROOM – EVENING
Beginning: (Intrigue) Dr. Thorn presents the found items, hoping to piece together more of the puzzle.
Middle: (Betrayal) Accusations fly as inconsistencies emerge, with members feeling betrayed by those they had started to trust.
Ending: (Major Twist) An unexpected piece of evidence turns the suspicion towards a member previously thought innocent, reshaping the group dynamics.

52. INT. GREAT ROOM – LATER
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) As the debate intensifies, Dr. Thorn’s realization about Felix shifts her focus.
Middle: (Major Twist) Felix seizes a power outage moment to expose Dr. Thorn’s past, using her vulnerabilities against her.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The group reacts with shock and confusion in the dim emergency lighting, unsure of whom to trust, as Felix smirks in the shadows.

53. INT. GREAT ROOM – NIGHT
Beginning: (Intrigue) Lily courageously steps forward, holding a piece of evidence, as Felix watches, initially unbothered.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Lily plays the confession cam recording; Felix's own words betray him, revealing his true intentions and the depth of his manipulation.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Felix’s mask of innocence shatters, and he reacts with anger and desperation, realizing his plan is unraveling.

54. INT. HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS
Beginning: (Major Twist) As Felix tries to escape, a member tackles him, leading to a physical struggle that captures the group's pent-up tension.
Middle: (Betrayal) In a heated moment, Felix accuses Dr. Thorn of being responsible for past horrors, trying to turn the group against her with his revelations.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Felix is restrained, but his words leave a poisonous doubt among the group, significantly altering perceptions.

55. INT. GREAT ROOM – CONTINUOUS
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Dr. Thorn faces the group, her past exposed, struggling with the dual reality of her identity as a healer and a former killer.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Members react variously, some with anger and others with sympathy, as they process the complexities of Dr. Thorn’s character and past actions.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn makes a decision to fully confront her past, promising transparency and seeking forgiveness, showing her commitment to change and redemption.

56. INT. GREAT ROOM – LATER
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Dr. Thorn addresses the group with newfound clarity and resolve, ready to face the consequences of her actions.
Middle: (Major Twist) She announces her decision to turn herself in, a gesture that shocks and moves the group, highlighting her genuine transformation.
Ending: (Resolution) As the police take her away, the group reflects on their own paths and the impact of Dr. Thorn’s choices, with a sense of closure and the beginning of healing.

57. EXT. BOAT DOCK – NIGHT
Beginning: (External Dilemma) Dr. Thorn and Felix, accompanied by authorities, walk to the dock, each contemplating their impending futures.
Middle: (Surprise) In a quiet moment, Felix expresses a grudging respect for Dr. Thorn's courage, revealing a glimpse of his conflicted feelings.
Ending: (Resolution) Felix boards the boat, his fate sealed, as Dr. Thorn watches, her face a mix of relief and sorrow, ready to face her own legal battles.

58. INT. FOYER – MORNING
Beginning: (New Beginnings) The new day symbolizes fresh starts as members pack up, showing varied reactions to the recent events.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Dr. Thorn holds a final session, emphasizing forgiveness and the importance of moving forward, challenging each member to take control of their future.
Ending: (Resolution) The group departs with a sense of cautious optimism, each carrying lessons learned from their harrowing experience.

59. EXT. DOCK – DAY
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) The members board the boat, visibly changed by their experiences, showing signs of both weariness and relief.
Middle: (Resolution) Dr. Thorn says her goodbyes, each farewell meaningful and reflective of her new understanding and acceptance of her identity.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Dr. Thorn watches the boat leave, standing alone, her future uncertain but her spirit resolved to face whatever comes next.

60. EPILOGUE: MONTAGE
Beginning: (Reflection) Dr. Thorn in court, accepting her verdict with composure, symbolizing her acceptance of all consequences.
Middle: (New Beginnings) Vignettes of various members, like Lily planting in the garden and another starting a support group, showing paths of redemption or regression.
Ending: (Resolution) The camera pans over the now peaceful island, the mansion bathed in sunlight, suggesting hope and the possibility of new beginnings, with the past finally laid to rest.

[Margaret]

Margaret’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!
My Vision: To write profound faith-based screenplays that are produced.
What I learned: ChatGPT cannot always be trusted to do a good job.
My outline:
BEYOND THE SHADOW

Genre: Inspirational Drama
Concept: A terminally ill college student discovers faith and love, defying the odds to pursue his dreams and embrace the uncertainty of life.
Outline:
ACT 1
Scene 1
INT. GRANDMA’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Grandma wakes up in a cold sweat from a traumatic nightmare where a bear’s shadow falls on a sleeping baby. The bear attacks the baby three times but she and the baby’s mother fight to keep the baby safe. On the third attack, she cries out to heaven, and help arrives, driving the bear away.
• Beginning (Mystery): Grandma wakes up in a cold sweat from a traumatic nightmare where a bear’s shadow falls on a sleeping baby.
• Middle (Suspense): The bear attacks the baby three times but she and the baby’s mother fight to keep the baby safe.
• Ending (Surprise): On the third attack, she cries out to heaven, and help arrives, driving the bear away.
Scene 2
EXT. GRANDMA’S DINING ROOM – DAY
Jabin, full of optimism, shares his dreams of graduating, starting a career at Raytheon, and playing with a church band during Christmas dinner with his family, hiding a back pain that plagues him.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Jabin, full of optimism, shares his dreams of graduating, starting a career at Raytheon, and playing with a church band.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): During Christmas dinner, Jabin discreetly takes painkillers, ensuring no one notices.
• Ending (Mystery): Jabin’s optimistic outlook masks his concern over his back pain, suggesting that something more serious is happening beneath his cheerful demeanor.
Scene 3
EXT./INT. CAR – DAY
Jabin experiences acute pain and decides to go to the ER alone. He calls his parents en route and reassures them he is ok.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin experiences acute pain and decides to go to the ER alone.
• Middle (Misinterpretation): Jabin covers his fear and loneliness by making light of his pain, attributing it to a strained muscle.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Jabin’s reassurance leaves a lingering question: Is it just a strained muscle or something more serious?
INCITING INCIDENT
Scene 4
INT. ER – DAY
Jabin receives a terminal cancer diagnosis from Dr. Morgan, with tumors found throughout his body. Dr. Morgan tells him to give up dreams of graduating and focus on getting well, but gives him hope that with today’s advances in medicine he can kick this.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin anxiously waits for a diagnosis.
• Middle (Major Twist): Dr. Morgan delivers the terminal cancer diagnosis, telling Jabin to give up his dreams.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Dr. Morgan gives a slight hope with medical advances, but the fear of impossible dreams looms large.
Scene 5
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE – DAY
Dr. Morgan is on the phone with a colleague talking about Jabin. The conversation only partially heard, leaving the audience aware that Dr. Morgan is not as confident that Jabin’s cancer can be cured as he confidently asserts.
• Beginning (Superior Position): The audience hears Dr. Morgan’s doubts about curing Jabin’s cancer.
• Middle (Intrigue): Dr. Morgan discusses Jabin’s case, revealing his true concerns.
• Ending (Suspense): Dr. Morgan decides to treat until the patient/family come to the revelation that there is no hope, leaving the audience anxious about Jabin’s future.
ACT 2
Scene 6
INT. CANCER HOUSE – DAY
Jabin moves into a cancer house with his parents, feeling hopeless and stating, “So this is where I die…” Another cancer patient with brain tumors has disturbing behaviors, frightening Jabin with potential glimpses of his future.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): Jabin moves into the cancer house and expresses his hopelessness.
• Middle (Suspense): Another cancer patient’s disturbing behaviors frighten Jabin.
• Ending (Intrigue): The unsettling environment heightens Jabin’s fear of losing control in the future.
Scene 7
INT. GRANDMA’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Grandma wakes up disturbed, feeling a need to pray for Jabin.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Grandma wakes up disturbed.
• Middle (Mystery): She feels an urgent need to pray for Jabin.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Grandma prays fervently, hoping her prayers will protect Jabin.
Scene 8
INT. CANCER HOUSE – DAY
Jabin tells his parents he won’t give up on school, and they support him by helping him commute to classes.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin’s mother insists he quit school.
• Middle (Character Changes Radically): Jabin’s determination and resolve convince his parents to support his dream of graduating.
• Ending (Uncertainty): The family agrees to support Jabin’s education, hoping he can continue despite his health.
Scene 9
INT. SPERM BANK – DAY
On his birthday, Jabin goes to a sperm bank before starting chemo but learns he is already sterile.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Jabin visits the sperm bank with hopes of preserving his future.
• Middle (Major Twist): Jabin learns he is already sterile.
• Ending (Uncomfortable Moment): Jabin’s grief and sense of loss are palpable.
Scene 10
INT. CANCER HOUSE – DAY
Jabin loses his ability to walk well, write, and play the guitar.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin struggles with walking.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): He grapples with the frustration of not being able to write and play the guitar.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Jabin’s grief intensifies as he realizes he may never regain his abilities.
Scene 11
INT. GRANDMA’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Grandma dreams of a boat sailing without her, wakes sad, and prays for Jabin’s faith and future success.
• Beginning (Mystery): Grandma dreams of a boat sailing without her.
• Middle (Suspense): She wakes up sad, feeling the weight of her dream.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Grandma prays fervently, hoping her prayers will help Jabin.
Scene 12
INT. CLASSROOM – DAY
Jabin goes to school wheelchair-bound, uses a recorder to tape class notes, throws up into his mask. The instructor indicates he has five classes to pass to graduate and he is hopelessly behind in his homework, advising him to quit with the deadline to drop classes looming. Jabin refuses to quit.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): Jabin’s struggle in class is evident as he throws up into his mask.
• Middle (Suspense): The instructor advises him to quit due to being hopelessly behind.
• Ending (Internal Dilemma): Jabin’s determination to continue despite his health and academic challenges.
Scene 13
INT. BECCA’S DORM ROOM – DAY
Becca finds out from her mother that Jabin is no longer in Seattle, but in Arizona, at a college close to her, and has cancer. She shares her feelings with her mother, telling her that she feels Jabin was the “one who got away” and vows to visit him.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Becca learns about Jabin’s cancer and his move to Arizona.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): She shares her feelings with her mother, expressing her regret and determination.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Becca vows to visit Jabin, hoping to reconnect and support him.
Scene 14
INT. HOSPITAL – DAY
Becca reconnects with Jabin after learning about his diagnosis, reigniting her feelings and determination to support him. Becca apologizes for dumping Jabin in high school and promises to visit again.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Becca reconnects with Jabin in the hospital.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): She apologizes for their past, reigniting old feelings.
• Ending (Surprise): Becca’s promise to visit again brings warmth and hope to Jabin’s life.
Scene 15
INT. CANCER HOUSE – DAY
Jabin’s father and mother argue Jabin shouldn’t pursue a relationship with Becca. Jabin’s father tells Jabin they will get through this, but wait until he is better to add another relationship. Jabin reveals he has gained back his strength to walk. He picks up his guitar and is able to play.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin’s parents argue about his relationship with Becca.
• Middle (Major Twist): Jabin reveals he has regained his strength to walk.
• Ending (Hope/Fear): Jabin’s ability to play the guitar again gives hope for his recovery.
Scene 16
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE – DAY
Dr. Morgan shares with Jabin and his parents that he is in remission, but cautions them the cancer could return.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Dr. Morgan shares hopeful news of remission.
• Middle (Suspense): He cautions them about the potential return of cancer.
• Ending (Mystery) Will Jabin successfully complete his finals or will his health be compromised?
Scene 17
INT. CANCER HOUSE – DAY
Jabin is up late, studying, with only a slim chance he will finish his assignments and pass his finals. His parents encourage him by planning a celebration cruise and promise to help him go house hunting after graduation.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin sits at his desk, books and papers scattered everywhere, the clock ticking ominously as he works furiously on his assignments, aware of the looming deadlines.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Jabin’s parents come into the room, see his struggle, and share their plans for a celebration cruise and house hunting after graduation. Jabin is torn between his fear of not graduating and the hope these plans give him.
• Ending (Uncertainty): Jabin looks at his parents with determination, thanking them for their support but with a lingering look of doubt, knowing the challenge ahead is immense.
Scene 18
INT. BECCA’S DORM – DAY
Becca lets her mom know she may not be returning to Seattle after she graduates. She has applied for a teaching position in Tucson, where Jabin will be working at Raytheon. Her mother worries she will be left alone, but supports her decision.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Becca sits at her desk, a map of Tucson on her computer screen, talking on the phone with her mother, revealing her plans to move.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Becca’s mother expresses her worry about being alone, causing Becca to feel guilty and conflicted about her decision.
• Ending (Superior Position): Becca’s mother, hiding her sadness, supports Becca’s decision, saying she wants her to follow her heart, while the audience knows the mother’s true feelings of loneliness and worry.
Scene 19
INT. CAFÉ – DAY
Jabin dates Becca, and overcomes his fear of commitment from his fear of his future and their past relationship when he asks her to become his girlfriend.
• Beginning (Mystery): Jabin and Becca sit at a cozy corner table in a bustling café, the atmosphere light yet charged with unspoken emotions.
• Middle (Mislead/Reveal): Jabin struggles with his words, making small talk, as Becca senses his hesitation and misinterprets it as disinterest. Jabin finally gathers his courage and asks her to be his girlfriend, revealing his true feelings.
• Ending (Surprise): Becca, taken aback but delighted, accepts with a radiant smile, turning what seemed like a hesitant outing into a joyful commitment.
Scene 20
INT. UNIVERSITY CAMPUS – DAY
Jabin graduates.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Jabin, dressed in his cap and gown, checks his phone. Tells his parents he has permission to walk but no clear answer as to whether he has completed the graduation requirements.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): As names are called, Jabin’s family screams their support. Jabin walks to receive his diploma, catching the eye of the teacher whose grade he is waiting for, the teacher gives no hint of emotion.
• Ending (Surprise): Jabin sits back at his seat, rechecks his phone. The answer is in, he has met his graduation requirements. The graduation is for real.

Scene 21

INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE – DAY
Jabin has a follow-up visit and shares the positives: graduation, offer on a house, cruise plans, job lined up. As Jabin leaves, Dr. Morgan stiffly congratulates him and says he had another patient that got better and graduated. As Jabin closes the door, Dr. Morgan whispers, “but then she died.”
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin sits in Dr. Morgan’s office, sharing all the good news about his graduation, house offer, cruise plans, and job at Raytheon.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Dr. Morgan listens with a forced smile, his congratulatory words laced with an undercurrent of doubt and unease.
• Ending (Major Twist): As Jabin leaves the office, Dr. Morgan’s whispered words, “but then she died,” cast a dark shadow over the optimistic future, leaving Jabin and the audience with a sense of foreboding.

ACT 3
Scene 22
INT. PARENT’S KITCHEN – DAY
Jabin shares a home lab test, waiting for the results. They fear the cancer has returned.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin anxiously waits for the lab test results with his parents, creating a tense atmosphere in the kitchen.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): The family tries to engage in small talk and mundane activities to distract themselves, but the tension and fear are palpable. Jabin’s mother accidentally drops a plate, shattering the silence and increasing the awkwardness.
• Ending (Major Twist): The test results come in, confirming their worst fear: the cancer is back. The family is devastated, their hopes shattered.
Scene 23
INT. PARENT’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Scene Description: Jabin’s mother informs Grandma via FaceTime that Jabin’s radiology and lab results are back: the cancer has returned and he has five new brain tumors.
• Beginning (More interesting setting): Jabin’s mother sits in the living room, surrounded by family photos and mementos, enhancing the emotional weight of the news she has to share with Grandma.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Jabin’s mother struggles to hold back tears as she tells Grandma the bad news over the phone, her voice breaking. She tells them Jabin wants them to go on the cruise without him and that Becca will be there during his next rounds of treatment. The silence on the other end of the line amplifies the discomfort and heartbreak.
• Ending (Suspense): After the call, Grandma falls to her knees and prays, her unwavering faith contrasting with the dire situation, leaving us to wonder if her prayers will be answered.
Scene 24
INT. CANCER HOUSE – DAY
Becca helps Jabin with bouts of nausea and vomiting. They find hope in a Bible verse, “This sickness is not unto death.”
• Beginning (Character changes radically): Becca, usually upbeat and optimistic, is now serious and nurturing as she tends to Jabin during his bouts of nausea, showing her commitment and deep care.
• Middle (Intrigue): Becca reads the Bible to Jabin, and they stumble upon the verse “This sickness is not unto death.” The verse gives them both a glimmer of hope, suggesting that there might be a divine plan at work.
• Ending (Suspense): As Jabin clings to the hope from the Bible verse, they share a tender moment of faith and uncertainty, wondering if this promise will hold true.
Scene 25
EXT./INT. WAFFLE HOUSE – DAY
Becca and Jabin argue outside the restaurant. Jabin insists on going in but Becca wants to take the food “to go”. Jabin wins out, but as they enter, he collapses and Becca calls 911.
• Beginning (Mislead / Reveal): The scene begins with what seems to be a normal argument about where to eat, misleading the audience into thinking it’s a trivial moment.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Jabin insists on going into the restaurant despite Becca’s protests, creating an awkward and tense moment as they cross the threshold, with Jabin visibly struggling.
• Ending (Major Twist): Just as they enter, Jabin collapses, revealing the severity of his condition and prompting Becca to frantically call 911, turning a seemingly normal outing into a medical emergency.

Scene 26
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
Dr. Morgan shares good news – tumor markers are down, but explains the need for risky stem cell therapy. Jabin and Becca discuss the implications.
• Beginning (Suspense): Dr. Morgan enters the room with a serious expression, causing Jabin and Becca to brace for potentially bad news.
• Middle (External Dilemma): Dr. Morgan explains that while his tumor markers are down, Jabin now faces a difficult choice: undergo a risky stem cell therapy or risk the cancer returning. The decision is fraught with potential losses either way.
• Ending (Internal Dilemma): Jabin and Becca discuss the implications of both choices, with Jabin torn between the fear of the therapy’s risks and not being available for this start date at Raytheon and the fear of not doing enough to fight the cancer, leaving them both in a state of emotional turmoil.
Scene 27
INT. RAYTHEON H.R. DEPT – DAY
Raytheon’s HR employees brainstorm a solution to the problem of too many new hires, deciding to offer a $10,000 bonus to those who can delay their start date until the end of October.
• Beginning (More interesting setting): The HR meeting takes place in a sleek, modern conference room, symbolizing the high stakes and corporate environment of Raytheon.
• Middle (Intrigue): The HR team discusses the dilemma of having too many new hires, creating a sense of curiosity about how they will resolve this issue.
• Ending (Surprise): They decide to send letters offering a $10,000 bonus to any new hire willing to delay their start date until October, unknowingly providing a perfect solution for Jabin’s dilemma.
Scene 28
INT. JABIN’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Jabin experiences a vision that impacts his decision. He decides to undergo stem cell therapy and finds a letter from Raytheon.
• Beginning (Mystery): Jabin prays about whether he should go through the stem cell therapy and has a vision: a light coming from a dark place. is deep in thought, reflecting on his vision which remains unclear to the audience, adding an air of mystery to his decision-making process.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Jabin searches for a book, finding a picture in the book that is the same as his vision, with the comment about God creating the light. He falls to his knees as he talks to God, knowing God wants him to go through with it and be his light in that dark place.
• Ending (Surprise): As he gets up from his knees, resolved to go through with the stem cell therapy, the letter from Raytheon arrives.

Scene 29
INT. MEDICAL CLINIC – DAY
During the stem cell harvest procedure, Jabin shares his vision with Becca, testing her resolve. Becca reaffirms her commitment to stay by his side.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): The sterile and intimidating environment of the medical clinic adds to the discomfort as Jabin undergoes the stem cell harvest, with Becca by his side.
• Middle (Character changes radically): Jabin, who had previously been focused on survival, now speaks with a newfound acceptance of his fate and determination to live daily for God and be a light regardless of the days he has left, revealing a significant internal transformation.
• Ending (Suspense): Jabin, testing Becca’s resolve, tells her she should be with someone who has a future, but Becca firmly reaffirms her commitment to stay by his side, leaving their future hanging in the balance.
Scene 30
EXT. RESTAURANT – EVENING
Jabin proposes to Becca and she accepts.
• Beginning (Suspense): The scene opens with Jabin nervously leading Becca to a balcony outside the restaurant, nervously fiddling with a ring box in his other hand, creating anticipation and suspense about his upcoming proposal.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): As Jabin starts his proposal, he stumbles over his words, creating an awkward but heartfelt moment that highlights his vulnerability and the gravity of the situation.
• Ending (Surprise): Becca, teary-eyed, immediately accepts Jabin’s proposal, surprising him and bringing a moment of pure joy and relief, marking a major emotional high point.
Scene 31
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
Stem cell therapy is traumatic, with Jabin experiencing severe side effects.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin experiences intense side effects, including vomiting and diarrhea. Becca watches helplessly, heightening the emotional discomfort and the severity of his condition, concerned when the nurse says it will get worse.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): The Chaplin arrives. The nurse and Becca help Jabin sit up so he can attend to him. Jabin is very weak, looks like he is dying.
• Ending (Uncertainty): The Chaplin introduces himself, asks if he can play a song for Jabin. Jabin immediately responds, “It is well with my soul.” The Chaplin fiddles with his phone, and the song begins, electrifying those in the room with a sense of peace.
ACT 4
Scene 31
INT. JABIN’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Becca berates Jabin for not starting his packing yet, with only two days before their flight to Seattle to get married. Jabin’s response is to keel over with chest pain, short of breath.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): Becca’s comes in to find an empty suitcase, berates him for not having packed with flight to wedding venue tomorrow. She expresses concern that he has cold feet.
• Middle (Suspense): Jabin keels over with chest pain, has difficulty breathing.
• End (Cliffhanger): Becca rushes Jabin out of the house to take him to the ER.
.
Scene 32
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY
Dr. Morgan shares the news: Jabin’s cancer is back. He has a tumor near his heart which probably caused the pneumothorax. He advises against flying – could mean sudden death. After he leaves, Jabin decides to fly anyway.
• Beginning (Reveal): Dr. Morgan reveals that Jabin’s cancer is back and that the tumor near his heart has caused a pneumothorax.
• Middle (External Dilemma): Dr. Morgan states that taking a flight to Seattle could cause sudden death. Jabin learns a major snowstorm makes driving impossible so he either stays and foregoes the wedding or risks flying.
• End (Cliffhanger): Jabin tells Becca he will take the flight and leave the timing of his death in God’s hands.
Scene 33
INT. GRANDMA’S BEDROOM – DAY
Grandma’s prayer for Jabin’s safety on the flight.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Grandma prays fervently for safety for Jabin on his flight.
• Essence: God honors Grandma’s prayers for Jabin.
• Conflict: Threat of sudden death.

Scene 34
INT. PLANE – DAY
Jabin flies to Seattle.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Jabin and Becca settle into their seats. Pray.
• Middle (Suspense): The flight takes off. Becca grips Jabin’s hand.
• End (Cliffhanger): The flight attendant asks if Jabin needs anything. He shakes his head “no”, one hand on his chest.
Scene 35
INT. GRANDMA’S BEDROOM – DAY
Grandma receives the news – Jabin made it safely.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Grandma’s phone rings.
• Middle (Suspense): Jabin’s mother is on the phone; says she has news about the flight.
• End (Surprise): Jabin’s mother reveals Jabin made it safely to Seattle.

Scene 36
INT. WEDDING VENUE – DAY.
Jabin and Becca are married, and instead of singing to each other, sing a praise song to God with the congregation. They do not share the news of Jabin’s return of cancer.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): Jabin and Becca face each other in front of the pastor.
• Middle (Mystery): The pastor pronounces them man and wife. They kiss and then the pastor says the wedding is not over. He requests everyone join the bride and groom up front.
• End (Surprise): A piano is brought in. Jabin and Becca lead the group in singing a praise song to God.
Scene 37
INT. DOCTOR’S OFFICE – DAY
Jabin expects another round of chemo. Dr. Morgan tells Jabin there is no hope, and give him prescription for oral chemo to help slow the cancer. He gives Jabin a prognosis of 6 months to live. He reveals that none of his patients with Jabin’s history has survived.
• Beginning (Suspense): Dr. Morgan says he knows Jabin expects another round of treatments but he can’t prescribe that.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Jabin is told that there is no longer hope for remission and gives him a prognosis of 6 months to live, but longer if he takes an oral chemo that is meant only to prolong his life, not cure him.
• End (Cliffhanger): Dr. Morgan lets Jabin know that none of his patients with his history have survived.
Scene 38
INT. RESTAURANT – DAY
Grandma is alone at a table, reading/praying for Jabin’s healing while drinking coffee. A man stops by the table, says “check out I John 5:14. He leaves and she sees that it is a verse saying she has what she has asked for.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Grandma stops reading her Bible – talks to God – prays for Jabin’s immediate healing, as in the Bible story she was reading.
• Middle (Uncomfortable moment): A stranger walks by Grandma’s table, stops, leans over and says, “Check out 1 John 5:14” then leaves without further explanation.
• End (Surprise): Grandma quickly looks up the verse, which states she has what she has asked for.
Scene 39
INT. PARENT’S LIVING ROOM – DAY
Jabin gives his parents the news: lab results show undetectable cancer. They double check results and patient info to assure themselves it is real. Jabin says whether this is a brief remission or full healing doesn’t matter. He knows where he is going when he dies and has committed himself to living a life of giving light for God.
• Beginning (Suspense): Jabin’s mother asked Jabin if he has gotten his recent lab results back. Jabin agrees to look them up while Becca and his family, including Grandma, watch.
• Middle (Reveal): Jabin’s cancer is undetectable. The family double check his name/birth date. Hug, cry.
• End (Cliffhanger): Jabin’s mother questions why he isn’t more emotional. Jabin says whether this is a brief remission or full healing doesn’t matter. He knows where he is going when he dies and has committed himself to living a life of giving light for God.

Scene 40
INT. CHURCH – DAY
Jabin leads singing in church worship team, playing the guitar. Dr. Morgan slips in the back door.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Jabin is with a worship team, leading singing.
• Middle (Reveal): Jabin tells the church he is still in remission.
• End (Surprise): Dr. Morgan slips in the back door of the church and takes a seat.

[Monica Arisman]

Subject: Monica’s Fascinating Scenes Outline

VISION: I am a very successful screenwriter who has had multiple movies made.

What I learned doing this assignment is once you have all the elements in the scenes it should make it easier to write a good script. I also found that ChatGPT wasn’t too useful in this exercise because most of the scenes IT were repeated over and over and added a few of its own.

OUTLINE DRAFT 2

TITLE: GOD’s LIBRARY

GENRE: Drama/Fantasy

ACT 1

OPENING

1. INT. EMILY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT

Scene Arc: From Emily coming home from work, sitting down to write at her computer, to being drunk.

Essence: Emily is an alcoholic.

Conflict: Will the alcohol destroy her?

Subtext: She wants to be a successful writer.

Hope/fear: We hope she’ll stop drinking. We fear it will kill her and her dreams.

BEGINNING: (SUSPENSE) Emily comes home from work and looks at an envelope from a publisher.

MIDDLE: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Emily opens a bottle of wine, pours herself a glass, and stares at it.

ENDING: (UNCERTAINTY) Gulps down the wine.

2. EXT. CITY STREETS – NIGHT

Scene Arc: It’s Christmas Eve. Emily comes home from work. Opens her mail to another rejection letter.

Essence: The rejection letter pushes Emily over the edge.

Conflict: Christmas is supposed to be a joyous time of year. But another rejection letter ruins any Christmas spirit.

Subtext: Rage and frustration.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily calms down. Fear she’ll do herself harm.

BEGINNING: (UNCERTAINTY) Rips open the letter.

MIDDLE: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily starts crying and drinking glass after glass of wine.

ENDING: (SUSPENSE) Sirens in the background.

INCITING INCIDENT

3. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: From attempting suicide to having a near-death experience.

Essence: “Death is only the beginning.”

Conflict: Cannot even kill herself properly.

Subtext: It’s not Emily’s time to die.

Hope/fear: Hope she gets medical treatment ASAP. Fear she’ll have to return to her miserable life. (OR, Fear she dies.)

BEGINNING: (INTERESTING SETTING) Emily stands in a huge library.

MIDDLE: (MISINTERPRETATION) Emily is confused. She should be dead.

ENDING: (MYSTERY) Where is Emily?

4. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Meets God who has a mission for her but she must return.

Essence: There is no death just a transition.

Conflict: Suicide is taboo so how can Emily meet God?

Subtext: God is all-loving and has a mission for each of us.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily can stay with God. Fear she has to return and she won’t be able to fulfill her mission.

BEGINNING: (SURPRISE) Meets God which is contrary to her belief system.

MIDDLE: (INTRIGUE) What does God want with Emily?

ENDING: (TWIST) God wants Emily to help Him/Her.

TURNING POINT

5. INT. HOSPITAL – DAY

Scene Arc: From being revived in the hospital to returning to her brother’s home.

Essence: Emily has always had love in her life.

Conflict: To tell or not to tell her NDE story.

Subtext: Help was always available, Emily just had to ask for it.

Hope/fear: Hope her brother would understand if she told him her story. Fear he’d laugh at her.

BEGINNING: (SUPERIOR POSITION) Emily has had an NDE.

MIDDLE: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily has to tell her story to her brother.

ENDING: (MISINTERPRETATION) Emily’s brother loves her and takes her home with him to recuperate. Emily didn’t think she had love in her life.

6. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily returns with her brother to his home where a puppy greets her and she starts to have visions of the library.

Essence: Donahue greets Emily and tells her he is the guardian of the library and will help her with her mission.

Conflict: Emily doesn’t trust Donahue.

Subtext: Why does God’s library need a guardian?

Hope/fear: Hope Donahue is who he says he is. Fear he’s a demon in disguise.

BEGINNING: (SURPRISE) Emily has her own suite in her brother’s big house and a puppy.

MIDDLE: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily doesn’t trust Donahue.

ENDING: (EXTERNAL DILEMMA) Should Emily trust Donahue or should she attempt to contact God?

ACT 2

NEW PLAN

7. INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT

Scene Arc: Emily explores the library and meets the forgotten souls of writers. Donahue guides Emily to a hidden section of the library where ancient scripts glow with an otherworldly light. He presents Emily with a cryptic outline written in an ancient language, which she must decipher to progress.

Essence: There is more to this library than meets the eye.

Conflict: The outline is written in a cryptic language that Emily must decipher to move on to the works of the forgotten writers.

Subtext: Emily’s job is to finish their creations which were all drafted to bring spirituality back to humanity. But first must decipher an outline for her first article.

Hope/fear: Hope that Emily can pass the test. Fear of what will happen to her if she fails.

BEGINNING: (MORE INTERESTING SETTING) The library with forgotten souls of writers.

MIDDLE: (UNCERTAINTY) How is Emily supposed to decipher a cryptic language?

ENDING: (INTRIGUE) How will the souls of forgotten writers help Emily?

8. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Meeting Azazel – who’s there to help!

Essence: Azazel appears to provide Emily with assistance.

Conflict: The puppy doesn’t like Azazel so Emily is cautious.

Subtext: Azazel introduces himself with a flourish and is the real demon.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily sees through Azazel’s façade. Fear she’ll be seduced by his beauty and actions.

BEGINNING: (UNCERTAINTY) Emily is suspicious of Azazel.

MIDDLE: (MYSTERY) Maybe he really is who he says he is.

ENDING: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) Azazel has his own agenda.

9. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Azazel helps Emily with the translation so Emily can write the story.

Essence: Emily believes Azazel is there to help.

Conflict: Azazel makes her nervous, and Emily looks for some alcohol. But her brother has removed all the alcohol.

Subtext: Falling back into old destructive patterns.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily snaps out of it. Fear Azazel will manipulate Emily for his own purposes.

BEGINNING: (MISINTERPRETATION) Emily misinterprets Azazel’s role.

MIDDLE: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Emily finds the task difficult and is falling back into old destructive patterns.

ENDING: (SUPERIOR POSITION) The audience sees Azazel for who he is but Emily is fragile and cannot see his schemes, yet.

10. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: In meditation, Emily explores the library interacting with the forgotten souls of writers and their characters, an imprisoned guardian, and learning about her past.

Essence: Emily begins to learn about her past lives and their connection to her current mission.

Conflict: Between what Emily believed and what she is learning now.

Subtext: She must free the souls and the real guardian.

Hope/fear: Hope she is strong enough to accomplish the mission. Fear she is too fragile and will be destroyed.

BEGINNING: (INTERESTING SETTING) Emily explores more of the library.

MIDDLE: (UNCERTAINTY) Emily is stunned by what she learns

ENDING: (TWIST) Somehow, she must free the souls and the guardian.

PLAN IN ACTION

11. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Armed with new information, Emily creates an outline for another article.

Essence: The souls of forgotten writers are helping her write free of Donahue and Azazel.

Conflict: Doubts about her abilities and the true intentions of Donahue and Azazel.

Subtext: By interacting with the writers Emily has freed them.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily can prevail. Fear of what will happen to her and the writers if Donahue and Azazel find out they’re free.

BEGINNING: (BETRAYAL) Emily betrays Donahue and Azazel by writing another article.

MIDDLE: (SURPRISE) Emily interacts with the forgotten writers to help with her article.

ENDING: (MYSTERY) What is Emily and the writers trying to accomplish?

12. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily goes in search of Donahue and finds him and Azazel plotting to take Emily over.

Essence: Donahue and Azazel believe they can turn Emily to their side.

Conflict: A line in the sand has been drawn. Emily and the Forgotten Writers versus Donahue and Azazel.

Subtext: There is evil lurking within the heavenly realm.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily is strong enough to resist them. Fear she’s too fragile and will succumb to their machinations.

BEGINNING: (BETRAYAL) Donahue and Azazel are betraying Emily.

MIDDLE: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) Donahue is going along with Azazel to protect Emily.

ENDING: (TWIST) Evil lurks in the heavenly realm.

MIDPOINT TURNING POINT

Scene Arc: From Emily hiding the knowledge she knows about Donahue and Azazel to finding a way through to defeat them.

13. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Essence: Emily inserts her knowledge into the article with Azazel making suggestions that if she inserts them into her article she will be a rich woman.

Conflict: Emily’s moral dilemma between wanting riches versus doing the right thing.

Subtext: Emily is tired of being poor.

Hope/fear: Hope she can resist Azazel’s offer. Fear she will fail.

BEGINNING: (SUSPENSE) Azazel is dangling riches in front of Emily.

MIDDLE: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Between Emily tired of being poor and doing the right thing.

ENDING: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily doesn’t like Azazel.

14. INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT

Scene Arc: Emily discovers another section of the library which allows her to continue to piece together who she is.

Essence: We are all divine beings having a human experience.

Conflict: Emily doesn’t want to remember who she is.

Subtext: Emily’s more powerful than she thinks.

Hope/fear: Hope she can overcome her fear of progress and change. Fear she will stay the same.

BEGINNING: (INTERESTING SETTING) Another section of the library.

MIDDLE: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Emily struggles with change.

ENDING: (CHARACTER CHANGES RADICALLY) Emily is changing however, reluctantly.

ACT 3

RE-THINK EVERYTHING

15. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily faces increasing pressure from Donahue and realizes the dangerous price of unlocking the library's secrets.

Essence: Donahue discovers Emily isn’t working on HIS story.

Conflict: Donahue versus Emily.

Subtext: Donahue realizes that God has found the one soul that can get rid of him.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily is strong enough to handle Donahue. Fear Emily fails.

BEGINNING: (EXTERNAL DILEMMA) Work on Donahue’s story and unleash dangerous secrets or stay the course with God’s mission.

MIDDLE: (BETRAYAL) Writing Donahue’s story is a betrayal of God’s mission.

ENDING: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) When Donahue realizes God found the one soul to defeat him.

16. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: From Azazel underestimating Emily’s strength to being crushed by Emily.

Essence: Emily’s strength is tested by Azazel.

Conflict: Azazel’s quest for power by any means necessary versus Emily’s commitment to God.

Subtext: Emily is stronger than she believes.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily can fight off Azazel. Fear Azazel will conquer Emily and kill the puppy.

BEGINNING: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Azazel attempts to assault Emily but when she resists he tries to kill the puppy.

MIDDLE: (SUSPENSE) Will Emily fight back and save the puppy?

ENDING: (TWIST) Emily leaves Azazel badly wounded and saves the puppy.

17. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Donahue finds Azazel wounded by Emily and decides Emily must be eliminated since they can’t turn her to their side.

Essence: Emily is becoming more comfortable in her role and therefore, stronger.

Conflict: Donahue sides with Azazel confirming Emily’s suspicions about the two and now must watch her back.

Subtext: The Forgotten Writers are helping Emily defeat the guardian.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily can continue to grow. Fear she’ll return to her destructive behavior patterns.

BEGINNING: (SURPRISE) Donahue finds Azazel wounded by Emily.

MIDDLE: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) Revealing that Donahue and Azazel are working together.

ENDING: (UNCERTAINTY) Can Emily continue to grow more powerful?

NEW PLAN

18. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily can now enter the library without meditation and without Donahue or Azazel knowing.

Essence: Emily is growing stronger.

Conflict: Destroying Azazel and Donahue goes against her belief in the sixth commandment.

Subtext: But Azazel and Donahue were not made by God.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily can discover the true creator of Azazel and Donahue. Fear they’ll destroy her before she can.

BEGINNING: (INTRIGUE) How is Emily able to grow stronger?

MIDDLE: (TWIST) Emily has latent spiritual powers that are awakening.

ENDING: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Is Emily a powerful spiritual being or is Emily just another murderous human?

19. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily publishes a piece but its message was twisted by Azazel.

Essence: Emily is devastated by the article.

Conflict: Could this setback unleash Emily’s destructive behavior patterns?

Subtext: Chaos is unleashed in the world and Emily is to blame.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily has become strong enough to weather the storm. Fear she will fall back into destructive behavior patterns.

BEGINNING: (TWIST) Emily’s article is published but has been altered by Azazel.

MIDDLE: (SURPRISE) At the damage being wrought by a piece of writing.

ENDING: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily teeters on the edge of falling back into destructive behavior.

TURNING POINT: HUGE FAILURE/MAJOR SHIFT

20. EXT. EMILY’S SUITE – NIGHT

Scene Arc: Emily is devastated but instead of letting it crush her, she resolves to beat them at their own game.

Essence: End times are unleashed upon the world.

Conflict: Emily’s anger versus Donahue and Azazel’s arrogance.

Subtext: Emily has finally realized to direct her anger at the source instead of letting it destroy her.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily succeeds. Fear she fails.

BEGINNING: (MORE INTERESTING SETTING) The apocalypse is unleashed.

MIDDLE: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) This is temporary as Azazel only wanted to push Emily towards his and Donahue’s scheme.

ENDING: (CHARACTER CHANGES RADICALLY) Emily starts to direct her anger to the real problem, which isn’t herself.

21. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Confronts Azazel. Destroys him by turning him to dust.

Essence: Get rid of Azazel.

Conflict: Emily versus Azazel.

Subtext: Emily has resolved the sixth commandment and has gotten stronger for it.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily survives. Fear Azazel has recovered enough to destroy Emily.

BEGINNING: (SUPERIOR POSITION) Emily destroys Azazel but Donahue doesn’t know.

MIDDLE: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Emily has resolved the sixth commandment.

ENDING: (SUSPENSE) What happens now?

22. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Writes another article to calm the masses and stops Donahue.

Essence: Emily’s storytelling abilities have grown.

Conflict: Emily versus Donahue.

Subtext: Donahue’s power has been diminished since Azazel’s extinction.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily’s realizes her power. Fear Donahue will somehow take it from her.

BEGINNING: (MISINTERPRETATION) Emily writes another article saying the first one was a test of Hollywood’s new CGI.

MIDDLE: (TWIST) Donahue’s power is diminishing.

ENDING: (INTRIGUE) What will Emily do with Donahue?

23. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Donahue confronts Emily attempting to seize control of the library’s power.

Essence: Emily’s newfound confidence makes her unyielding.

Conflict: Emily/Library versus Donahue.

Subtext: The library is alive.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily’s new skills are enough to defeat Donahue. Fear she fails.

BEGINNING: (TWIST) Emily and the library are now one.

MIDDLE: (CHARACTER CHANGES) Emily continues to grow and change.

ENDING: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) Reveal the Library is alive.

24. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily tells Donahue how she destroyed Azazel and now she will destroy him.

Essence: Transform the library into a beacon of hope.

Conflict: Donahue wants the power of the library for himself.

Subtext: Donahue is not a divine being.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily prevails. Fear she fails.

BEGINNING: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Donahue threatens Emily.

MIDDLE: (SURPRISE) Emily starts to weave a story.

ENDING: (INTRIGUE) The library comes alive but only at Emily’s command.

25. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: To save himself, Donahue reveals his backstory.

Essence: Will Emily believe Donahue is a victim of circumstance?

Conflict: Lies versus truths.

Subtext: Donahue trying to save his skin.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily prevails. Fear Donahue prevails.

BEGINNING: (EXTERNAL DILEMMA) Does Emily believe Donahue?

MIDDLE: (BETRAYAL) Donahue will betray Emily.

ENDING: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) Donahue still wants the power of the library for himself.

Act 4

CLIMAX/ULTIMATE EXPRESSION OF THE CONFLICT

26. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: The climax involves Emily using her newfound powers to write a story that changes reality.

Essence: Emily confronts Donahue about his lies.

Conflict: Donahue’s nature prevents him from recognizing his lies and Emily’s ability to use her powers.

Subtext: Emily uses her storytelling abilities to protect all the aspects of the library.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily can protect the library. Fear that Donahue has another trick up his sleeve to thwart Emily.

BEGINNING: (CHARACTER CHANGES) Emily is at her full power.

MIDDLE: (MISINTERPRETATION) Donahue has misread the situation because it’s in his nature not to change.

ENDING: (CLIFFHANGER) The forgotten writers rise against Donahue.

27. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily destroys Donahue to great cheering.

Essence: Emily uses her storytelling abilities to destroy Donahue.

Conflict: Emily feels bad she had to destroy another being.

Subtext: There is power in a story.

Hope/fear: Hope Emily has changed. Fear that alcohol addiction will rise again.

BEGINNING: (TWIST) Emily can weave the magic of the library with her story-telling.

MIDDLE: (SUSPENSE) There is power in the story.

ENDING: (UNCERTAINTY) Is Donahue really gone?

28. INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Arc: Writes the best story of her life based on a dream she found in the archives. Publishes it to great acclaim.

Essence: The power of words can change lives.

Conflict: Newfound fame could trigger her addiction.

Subtext: Emily’s success is finally here.

Hope/fear: Hope she continues to have success. Fear the addiction will come back.

BEGINNING: (UNCERTAINTY)

MIDDLE: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily is afraid of her new life.

ENDING: (INTERNAL DILEMMA) Emily’s afraid she’ll start drinking again.

29. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Donahue tries to subvert her story but fails.

Essence: Emily’s determination and newfound powers are too strong for Donahue.

Conflict: Emily vs Donahue

Subtext: Donahue admits defeat and helps Emily secure the library’s future.

Hope/fear: Hope for the future. Fear Donahue will return.

BEGINNING: (TWIST) Donahue’s not gone.

MIDDLE: (UNCERTAINTY) What will Emily do now?

ENDING: (SURPRISE) Donahue turns to Emily’s side and helps secure the library.

RESOLUTION

30. INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Arc: Emily emerges victorious but changed, having embraced her role as a storyteller and found purpose in her writing. She releases the true guardian. God thanks Emily and thanks her for tipping the scales in favour of the Divine.

Essence: Embraces her storytelling abilities to great acclaim. Good always triumphs over evil.

Conflict: Facing future challenges – everyone wants an interview.

Subtext: Emily needed to fail before she could succeed.
Hope/fear:

BEGINNING: (CHARACTER CHANGE IS COMPLETE) Emily has secured the library and has become an acclaimed writer.

MIDDLE: (MISLEAD/REVEAL) The true guardian is released and revealed (must be set up from the beginning).

ENDING: (UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Emily is uncomfortable giving interviews.

CHAT GPT VERSION

ACT 1

Scene 1

INT. EMILY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily comes home from work and, in an attempt to write, succumbs to alcohol.

• Beginning: More interesting setting: Emily returns to her cluttered apartment, filled with empty bottles and half-written manuscripts, making the setting feel oppressive and chaotic. Emily stares at her computer, her fingers hovering over the keys, but her gaze drifts to a bottle of whiskey.

• Middle: Internal Dilemma: Torn between her ambition and her addiction, Emily pours herself a drink, trying to drown out the voices of doubt. She mumbles about her dreams of success while the alcohol slowly takes hold.

• Ending: Uncomfortable Moment: Emily drunkenly stumbles and falls, knocking over her desk and spilling her drink on her unfinished manuscript, symbolizing her crumbling dreams.

Scene 2

EXT. CITY STREETS – NIGHT

Scene Description: It’s Christmas Eve. Emily opens her mail to another rejection letter, pushing her to the edge.

• Beginning: Suspense: Emily trudges through festive streets filled with joyous families and decorations, creating a stark contrast with her somber mood. She reaches her mailbox, her hands trembling as she opens another letter.

• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Emily’s face contorts with rage and frustration as she reads the rejection letter. The cheerful sounds of Christmas carols around her only amplify her sense of isolation and failure.

• Ending: Misinterpretation: In her anger, Emily lashes out, crumpling the letter and throwing it away, misinterpreting the rejection as a personal attack on her worth, which deepens her despair.

Scene 3

INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Description: Emily, in a state of hopelessness, attempts suicide but experiences a near-death encounter.

• Beginning: Uncertainty: Emily sits in the library, her surroundings dim and filled with shadows. She hesitates, holding a bottle of pills, struggling with the decision.

• Middle: Suspense: As she swallows the pills, her vision blurs, and she collapses, feeling the pull between life and death. The room around her starts to shift into a surreal version of itself.

• Ending: Surprise: Just when it seems she might pass away, a bright light envelops her, and she finds herself standing in an ethereal version of the library, hinting that death is not the end.

Scene 4

INT. LIBRARY – DAY

Scene Description: Emily meets God, who assigns her a mission but insists she must return to the living.

• Beginning: Mystery: In the luminous library, Emily encounters a warm, divine presence that she perceives as God. The atmosphere is filled with an overwhelming sense of peace and love.

• Middle: Character changes radically: God reveals to Emily that her life has a purpose she has yet to fulfill, shifting her perception of her existence from despair to potential. God’s loving nature
reassures her, igniting a spark of hope.

• Ending: External Dilemma: Emily faces the painful choice between staying in this serene afterlife or returning to her troubled life to complete her mission. She reluctantly agrees to return, fearing the challenges ahead but driven by a newfound sense of duty.

Scene 5

INT. HOSPITAL – DAY

Scene Description: Emily is revived in the hospital and returns to her brother’s home.

• Beginning: Suspense: In the hospital, Emily regains consciousness, the bright, sterile environment feeling harsh after her divine encounter. She struggles to grasp her surroundings and the reality
of her return.

• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Her brother visits, his concern palpable. Emily considers telling him about her near-death experience but hesitates, fearing disbelief and ridicule.

• Ending: Internal Dilemma: Deciding to keep her experience a secret for now, Emily leaves with her brother, feeling both comforted by his presence and burdened by the knowledge she carries.

Scene 6

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Description: Emily, now staying with her brother, starts to have visions of the library.

• Beginning: More interesting setting: Emily’s brother’s home is warm and welcoming, a stark contrast to her apartment. A puppy joyfully greets her, momentarily lifting her spirits.

• Middle: Suspense: As Emily settles in, she begins to see fleeting visions of the library, which disorient and confuse her. She questions her sanity, wondering if the visions are real or just a side effect of her near-death experience.

• Ending: Mystery: Donahue appears in one of the visions, introducing himself as the guardian of the library and offering to help her with her mission. Emily is left pondering his true nature and her next steps.

ACT 2

Scene 7

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily explores the library and meets the forgotten souls of writers. Donahue guides her to a hidden section where she must decipher a cryptic outline.

• Beginning: More interesting setting: The hidden section of the library is filled with ancient, glowing scripts and spectral figures, creating an atmosphere of wonder and intimidation. Emily’s curiosity and fear battle as she takes in her surroundings.

• Middle: Suspense: Donahue presents a cryptic outline written in an ancient language. Emily feels the weight of her task, knowing that deciphering it is crucial for her mission. The forgotten souls of writers watch her, their silent presence both a comfort and a pressure.

• Ending: Internal Dilemma: Emily resolves to decipher the outline, torn between her self-doubt and the hope of unlocking the library’s secrets. She feels both empowered and overwhelmed by the responsibility.

Scene 8

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Description: Azazel appears, offering to assist Emily, but the puppy’s reaction makes her wary.

• Beginning: More interesting setting: Azazel’s arrival is marked by a sudden shift in the room’s atmosphere, becoming darker and more ominous. The puppy’s growls add to the tension, setting Emily on edge.

• Middle: Betrayal: Despite his charming demeanor, Azazel’s presence feels off. Emily is cautious, remembering Donahue’s warning and the puppy’s reaction, hinting at a potential betrayal.

• Ending: Suspense: Emily decides to cautiously accept Azazel’s help, keeping her guard up. She hopes to gain valuable insights while fearing Azazel’s true intentions.

Scene 9

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Description: Azazel helps Emily with the translation, making her nervous, and she looks for alcohol but finds none.

• Beginning: Suspense: Emily and Azazel sit down to work on the translation. The tension is palpable as Emily tries to gauge Azazel’s motives. Her anxiety grows as she struggles with the ancient language.

• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Azazel’s proximity and overbearing presence make Emily uneasy. She reaches for a bottle, only to remember her brother has removed all the alcohol, forcing her to confront her nerves sober.

• Ending: Internal Dilemma: Emily reluctantly continues working with Azazel, fighting her craving for alcohol and trying to trust him despite her instincts. The hope of deciphering the outline drives her forward, but fear of Azazel’s manipulation lingers.

Scene 10

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Description: Emily meditates and explores the library, learning about her past lives and their connection to her mission.

• Beginning: More interesting setting: In her meditative state, Emily finds herself in a more surreal, dreamlike version of the library, where the boundaries between past and present blur. She encounters the spirits of forgotten writers and their characters, each with a story to tell.

• Middle: Intrigue: As Emily interacts with these spirits, she uncovers fragments of her past lives and realizes her current mission is tied to these past experiences. Each revelation adds layers to her understanding and increases the stakes of her quest.

• Ending: Mystery: Emily learns about an imprisoned guardian and the true purpose of the library. She is left with a sense of urgency and a deeper connection to her mission, but also with many unanswered questions.

Scene 11

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – DAY

Scene Description: Emily creates an outline for another article with the help of the freed souls, independent of Donahue and Azazel.

• Beginning: More interesting setting: Emily’s suite is now filled with a comforting, otherworldly presence as the souls of the forgotten writers assist her. Their ghostly forms offer guidance and support, making the setting feel both magical and collaborative.

• Middle: Suspense: Emily works diligently, aware of the potential dangers if Donahue and Azazel discover what she’s doing. Her doubts about her abilities resurface, but the encouragement from the spirits keeps her going.

• Ending: Internal Dilemma: Emily finishes the outline, feeling a mix of pride and fear. She hopes her work will bring spirituality back to humanity but fears the repercussions if Donahue and Azazel find out.

Scene 12

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily’s translation is complete, but Donahue’s reaction leaves her uneasy. She contacts Azazel for help.

• Beginning: Suspense: Emily nervously presents the completed translation to Donahue, hoping for approval. Donahue’s reaction is guarded, which leaves Emily questioning her success.

• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Donahue’s cryptic comments and lack of enthusiasm make Emily doubt her work. She feels a growing sense of dread, unsure if she’s truly completed the task or if something crucial is missing.

• Ending: Misinterpretation: Frustrated and seeking validation, Emily contacts Azazel, hoping he can offer clarity. She misinterprets Donahue’s reaction as disapproval and turns to Azazel, unknowingly stepping into a potential trap.

Scene 13

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily realizes she can use her newfound knowledge to help others but must confront Donahue and Azazel.

• Beginning: Suspense: With Azazel’s insights, Emily gains a clearer understanding of her mission and its broader implications. She realizes she has the power to bring forgotten wisdom back to the world, but this puts her in direct conflict with Donahue and Azazel.

• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Emily grapples with the decision to confront Donahue and Azazel. She fears their power and the potential consequences of opposing them, but her sense of duty and newfound confidence push her forward.

• Ending: Internal Dilemma: Emily prepares for the confrontation, feeling both empowered and terrified. She knows this will be a pivotal moment in her mission, with the potential to change everything.

ACT 3

Scene 14

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily confronts Donahue, who reveals the library’s true purpose.

• Beginning: Suspense: In the ethereal library, Emily faces Donahue, the atmosphere tense and charged. She demands to know the true purpose of the library and her mission.

• Middle: Character changes radically: Donahue reveals the library’s purpose to protect and preserve forgotten knowledge, and Emily’s role in restoring it to humanity. This revelation shifts Emily’s
understanding of her mission and her place in the world.

• Ending: Mystery: Donahue warns Emily of the dangers ahead, leaving her with more questions than answers. She feels the weight of her task more acutely but is determined to see it through.

Scene 15

INT. EMILY’S SUITE – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily returns to her suite, discovering Azazel’s true nature and intentions.

• Beginning: Suspense: Emily arrives at her suite, finding it unusually dark and quiet. Azazel is there, waiting, his demeanor more sinister than before.

• Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Azazel reveals his true nature and intentions, attempting to manipulate Emily into abandoning her mission. The puppy’s fearful reaction heightens the tension.

• Ending: Internal Dilemma: Emily, feeling betrayed and terrified, realizes she must outsmart Azazel to protect the library’s secrets and fulfill her mission. She prepares for a final showdown, determined but unsure of her chances.

Scene 16

INT. LIBRARY – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily defeats Azazel, freeing the imprisoned guardian, and gains control of the library.

• Beginning: Suspense: In the climactic showdown in the library, Emily faces Azazel. The atmosphere is intense, filled with the echoes of forgotten voices urging her on.

• Middle: Character changes radically: Drawing on her newfound knowledge and the support of the forgotten souls, Emily outsmarts and defeats Azazel, freeing the imprisoned guardian.

• Ending: Transformation: Emily gains control of the library, her mission accomplished. She feels a profound sense of fulfillment and purpose, knowing she can now help restore forgotten wisdom to humanity.

Scene 17

EXT. CITY STREETS – NIGHT

Scene Description: Emily, feeling a new sense of purpose, walks through the festive streets, ready to share her wisdom with the world.

• Beginning: Suspense: Emily walks through the city streets, the festive lights and cheerful sounds now reflecting her inner peace and determination.

• Middle: Transformation: She carries with her the knowledge and wisdom she has gained, ready to share it with the world. Her journey has transformed her from a despairing writer to a beacon of
forgotten wisdom.

• Ending: Fulfillment: Emily feels a deep sense of fulfillment, knowing her mission is just beginning. She smiles, ready to face the future with hope and confidence.

• This reply was modified 11 months ago by  Monica Arisman.

[Robin Fellows]

WIM+AI – Module 4 – Lesson 10
Robin’s: Making Every Scene Fascinating

MY VISION: I aim to make my writing flow naturally, like second nature, crafting stories that resonate globally and leave a mark, backed by a supportive team.
I learned by combing the scene requirements with the interesting techniques creates a complete detailed structure for each scene that makes it as interesting as possible.
Act 1: Setup
Scene 1
INT. THERAPIST'S OFFICE – NIGHT
Introduce Jake in a therapy session, hinting at his troubled past and current struggles.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake sits in the therapist's office, staring at a ticking clock.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) The therapist asks probing questions about Jake's past, revealing his internal conflicts.
Ending: (Mystery) Jake deflects, hinting at deeper, unresolved issues.

Scene 2
EXT. ABANDONED PARKING LOT – NIGHT
Establish the setting and hint at the danger looming around the characters.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The camera sweeps across an eerie, deserted parking lot.
Middle: (Suspense) A shadowy figure moves between the cars, watching Jake from a distance.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jake receives a cryptic message on his phone, setting up the next scene.

Scene 3
INT. CRIME SCENE – NIGHT
Jake arrives at a crime scene, indicating the start of his investigation.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Flashing police lights illuminate a grim crime scene.
Middle: (Suspense) Jake examines the body, uncovering clues.
Ending: (Mystery) He finds a symbol tied to the Dominion Syndicate.

Scene 4
INT. PRECINCT – JAKE'S DESK – DAY
Introduce Jake's work environment and his dedication to solving crimes.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake pours over case files at his cluttered desk.
Middle: (Suspense) He discovers connections between recent murders and the Syndicate.
Ending: (Mystery) A colleague warns Jake about pushing too hard against powerful enemies.

Scene 5
INT. MAYA'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Introduce Maya, her connection to Jake, and hint at her role in the plot.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Maya is engrossed in analyzing data on her computer.
Middle: (Suspense) She finds a pattern in the Syndicate's activities.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Maya calls Jake, telling him she has crucial information.

Scene 6
INT. JAKE'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Show Jake in his personal space, reflecting on the case and his own issues.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake reviews the case evidence in his dimly lit apartment.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) He struggles with the temptation of a bottle of whiskey.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Jake decides to push forward with the investigation despite his inner demons.
Scene 7
FLASHBACK – INT. ABANDONED WAREHOUSE – NIGHT
Reveal a crucial moment from Jake's past that impacts his current state.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Young Jake and his partner enter a dark warehouse.
Middle: (Major Twist) The partner is killed, and Jake is left with deep guilt.
Ending: (Mystery) The scene cuts back to present-day Jake, showing the lasting impact.

Act 2: Confrontation
Scene 8
INT. JAKE'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Jake delves deeper into the case, uncovering more clues.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake arranges the clues on his wall, connecting the dots.
Middle: (Mystery) He discovers a hidden link between the victims.
Ending: (Suspense) A knock on the door interrupts him, heightening the tension.

Scene 9
EXT. DARK ALLEYWAY – NIGHT
Jake faces immediate danger while following a lead.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake cautiously moves through the dark alley.
Middle: (Suspense) He spots a figure lurking in the shadows.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The figure attacks, and a struggle ensues.

Scene 10
INT. AUTOPSY ROOM – NIGHT
Jake and a medical examiner analyze evidence from a recent crime, leading to new insights.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The medical examiner shows Jake the latest autopsy results.
Middle: (Mystery) They find unusual markings on the victim linked to the Syndicate.
Ending: (Suspense) Jake receives a tip about a potential witness.

Scene 11
INT. JAKE'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Jake struggles with the mounting pressure and stakes.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake reviews the witness tip, feeling the pressure.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) He contemplates reaching out to Maya for help.
Ending: (Suspense) Jake decides to visit the witness, hoping for a breakthrough.

Scene 12
INT. MAYA'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Maya makes a breakthrough, sharing vital information with Jake.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Maya deciphers a crucial piece of data.
Middle: (Suspense) She calls Jake, sharing her findings.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Maya fears for her safety, realizing the Syndicate may be onto her.

Scene 13
EXT. ABANDONED FACTORY – NIGHT
Jake and Maya investigate a new lead, facing increasing threats.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They enter the abandoned factory, searching for evidence.
Middle: (Suspense) Jake and Maya find hidden documents linking the factory to the Syndicate.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) They hear footsteps approaching, realizing they are not alone.

Scene 14
INT. THERAPIST'S OFFICE – NIGHT
Jake revisits his therapist, revealing deeper personal conflicts and fears.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake hesitates before entering the therapist's office.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) The therapist digs deeper into Jake's guilt and addiction.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Jake leaves with a renewed determination to solve the case and confront his demons.

Scene 15
INT. VERONICA'S OFFICE – NIGHT
Introduce Veronica, showing her role and expertise in the project.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Veronica reviews reports in her sleek, modern office.
Middle: (Suspense) She makes a call, orchestrating her next move to tighten her control.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Veronica receives intel that Jake is getting closer, prompting her to act.

Scene 16
EXT. ABANDONED PARKING LOT – NIGHT
Another dangerous encounter, escalating the stakes.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake meets with an informant in the deserted parking lot.
Middle: (Suspense) The informant provides crucial information but is visibly scared.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) A car speeds towards them, and they narrowly escape an attempted hit.

Scene 17
INT. MAYA'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Maya uncovers more critical data, pushing the investigation forward.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Maya continues analyzing the Syndicate's data.
Middle: (Mystery) She discovers an encrypted message suggesting a deeper conspiracy.
Ending: (Suspense) Maya contacts Jake, urging him to meet her immediately.

Act 3: Climax
Scene 18
EXT. ABANDONED FACTORY – NIGHT
Jake and Maya face the climax's main confrontation, risking everything.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They approach the factory, determined to find the Syndicate's headquarters.
Middle: (Suspense) Inside, they navigate through traps and guards.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) They find a hidden door leading to the Syndicate's hidden base.

Scene 19
INT. LABORATORY – NIGHT
They discover pivotal information that could change everything.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake and Maya explore the laboratory, uncovering sinister experiments.
Middle: (Suspense) They find evidence implicating high-profile figures in the Syndicate.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Security alarms sound, alerting Syndicate members to their presence.

Scene 20
INT. HIDDEN COMPARTMENT – NIGHT
A hidden compartment reveals crucial evidence, escalating the tension.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They find a hidden compartment containing key documents.
Middle: (Mystery) The documents reveal the extent of the Syndicate's reach and plans.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Syndicate enforcers close in on their location.

Scene 21
INT. MAYA'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Maya and Jake prepare for the final confrontation, resolving their personal conflicts.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They regroup at Maya's apartment, strategizing their next move.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Jake opens up about his past, forging a stronger bond with Maya.
Ending: (Suspense) They gather their evidence, ready to expose the Syndicate and take them down.

Scene 22
INT. JAKE'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Jake reflects on the upcoming showdown, preparing mentally and physically.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake reviews his plan, ensuring every detail is covered.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) He contemplates the personal stakes and the risks involved.
Ending: (Suspense) Jake receives a message from an unknown number, warning him to back off.

Scene 23
INT. SAFE HOUSE – NIGHT
Jake and Maya strategize in a safe house, avoiding Syndicate surveillance.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They arrive at the safe house, checking for any signs of tampering.
Middle: (Suspense) Jake and Maya plan their final move, knowing the Syndicate is closing in.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) A noise outside puts them on high alert, preparing for possible attack.

Scene 24
EXT. ABANDONED WAREHOUSE – NIGHT
Final showdown with the Syndicate, full of action and high stakes.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They arrive at the warehouse, the Syndicate's final stronghold.
Middle: (Suspense) A fierce battle ensues, with Jake and Maya fighting off Syndicate enforcers.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jake confronts Veronica, the mastermind behind the Syndicate.

Act 4: Resolution
Scene 25
INT. WAREHOUSE – NIGHT
Jake and Veronica face off, culminating in a decisive confrontation.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Veronica taunts Jake, revealing her plans and motivations.
Middle: (Major Twist) A struggle ensues, with Jake narrowly overpowering Veronica.
Ending: (Suspense) Jake secures the evidence needed to bring down the Syndicate.

Scene 26
INT. MAYA'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Jake and Maya share a moment of relief and reflection.
Beginning: (Intrigue) They return to Maya's apartment, exhausted but victorious.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Jake contemplates the personal cost of their victory.
Ending: (Hope) Maya reassures Jake, hinting at a possible future together.
Scene 27
EXT. CITY STREETS – NIGHT
Show the city beginning to recover from the Syndicate's influence.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The camera pans over the city, showing signs of renewal and hope.
Middle: (Resolution) News reports highlight the downfall of the Syndicate and the arrests of key figures.
Ending: (Hope) Jake walks through the streets, feeling a sense of closure and peace.

Scene 28
INT. PRECINCT – DAY
Jake receives recognition for his efforts, though he remains humble and focused on healing.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The precinct is abuzz with activity as the Syndicate's downfall makes headlines.
Middle: (Suspense) Jake is offered a commendation for his work but reflects on the personal toll.
Ending: (Closure) He declines the ceremony, choosing to focus on moving forward with his life.

Scene 29
INT. JAKE'S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Jake finds personal closure, symbolically ending his journey.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Jake sits alone in his dimly lit apartment, reflecting on the case.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) He puts away the case files, symbolizing the end of his quest.
Ending: (Closure) Jake receives a call from the precinct, offering a commendation, but he declines, focusing on healing.

Scene 30
EXT. CITYSCAPE – NIGHT
A serene conclusion, showing the city as it begins to heal from the Syndicate's grip.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The camera pans over the cityscape, showing various landmarks associated with the case.
Middle: (Resolution) We see news reports of arrests within the Syndicate, hinting at the unraveling of the criminal organization.
Ending: (Hope) The camera zooms out to a wide shot of the city, symbolizing a new dawn and hope for a brighter future.

• This reply was modified 11 months ago by  Robin Fellows.

[Michael Collado]

Mike’s Fascinating Scene Outline

My Vision is to write an original screenplay, make a couple of calls to pitch it, to start a bidding war.

From this lesson, I learned how to break a scene down, similar to breaking a screenplay down with structure, and I am getting better with broad strokes.

Scene 1
INT. CAR – NIGHT
Jocinda saves a woman from a domestic beating during an unauthorized stakeout but lets a burglar escape.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Jocinda sits in her car, staking out a suspect’s house, when she hears a scream from a nearby alley.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Jocinda intervenes in the domestic dispute, saving the woman, but feels the weight of her decision as she watches the burglar escape in the distance.
Ending: (External Dilemma): Jocinda debates whether to pursue the fleeing burglar or stay and ensure the woman’s safety, ultimately choosing compassion over her gut instinct.

Scene 2
INT. DETECTIVE BULLPEN – DAY
Jocinda gets reprimanded by her Captain and exits the bullpen amidst snide remarks.
Beginning: (Mislead/Reveal): Jocinda disassembles her murder board, thinking she might get some recognition for her actions, only to be reprimanded.
Middle: (Betrayal): The Captain harshly criticizes her decision, and colleagues toss snide remarks her way, revealing underlying sexism.
Ending: (Major Twist):Jocinda’s defiant exit includes a bold statement about sexism, leaving the room in stunned silence.

Scene 3
INT. HALLWAY – DAY
Detective Sibowits offers Jocinda advice on navigating the system.
Beginning: (Superior Position): Jocinda storms down the hallway, visibly upset, unaware that Sibowits is watching her.
Middle: (Mentor Moment): Sibowits stops her and offers the advice, “You have to know how to play the game before you can change the rules,” challenging her approach.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma): Jocinda contemplates Sibowits’ words, torn between following her gut and adapting to the system.

Scene 4
EXT. WASHINGTON HOME – DAY
Jocinda has a tender moment with her goddaughter, Ava, while Kofi watches disapprovingly.
Beginning: (More Interesting Setting): Jocinda arrives at the Washington home, finds Ava struggling with chores in the yard, and learns her baseball team needs a coach.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Jocinda teaches Ava an easier way to do things, helping her finish quickly, but she feels Kofi’s disapproving gaze from the window.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically): Kofi confronts Jocinda, revealing his disdain for her methods, and Jocinda realizes she has more to prove.

Scene 5
INT. LITTLE LEAGUE BOARDROOM – DAY
Jocinda battles the board for the right to coach, leveraging her college baseball experience.
Beginning: (Suspense): Jocinda enters the boardroom, facing a group of skeptical board members.
Middle: (Conflict): She counters each sexist objection with sharp retorts, tension building as she cites her college baseball experience.
Ending: (Major Twist): The board reluctantly agrees to let her coach, but with a warning tone that sets the stage for future conflicts.

Scene 6
INT. WASHINGTON HOME – DAY
Jocinda announces she will be coaching Ava’s team because of the extra time on her hands, revealing her suspension, and faces Kofi’s skepticism.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Jocinda excitedly tells her Sister, Latisha, her husband, Kofi, about taking on coaching Ava’s team..
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Kofi mutters under his breath about Jocinda’s suspension, creating tension.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma): Jocinda feels a mix of pride and shame, knowing she must prove herself to her family.

Scene 7
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD DUGOUT – DAY
Coach Jo discovers the team is composed of brainiacs who struggle with baseball basics.
Beginning: (Mystery): in the dugout, Jocinda scans the roster and is amazed at how unathletic the team members are.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): During the first practice, the kids’ awkward attempts at basic skills create an uncomfortable scene.
Ending: (Suspense) Jocinda wonders how she is ever going to teach these kids the fundamentals of baseball.

Scene 8
INT. BASEBALL FIELD DUGOUT – DAY
Ava introduces the team from the dugout and explains their nicknames, showcasing their resilience.
Beginning: (More Interesting Setting): Ava steps into the dugout, where Coach Jo waits.
Middle: (Intrigue): Ava explains they are all brainiacs, which explains a lot. She also explains they all have nicknames, each with a story of resilience and coping with negativity.
Ending: (Misinterpretation) Jocinda attempts to grasp the nicknames’ concept but comically misses their deeper significance.

Scene 9
INT. BASEBALL FIELD DUGOUT – DAY
TyRod’s tragic past and Stanley’s autism are introduced, adding depth to their characters.
Beginning: (Suspense): Jocinda learns about TyRod’s family tragedy of losing his mother and brother in an accident.
Middle: (Intrigue): Ava introduces Stanley’s unique way of coping through statistics, highlighting his autism.
Ending: (Uncertainty): Jocinda feels the weight of their stories, wondering how to handle their unique needs.

Scene 10
NT. BASEBALL FIELD DUGOUT – DAY
Coach Jo again humorously misinterprets the kids’ nicknames, showcasing her learning curve.
Beginning: (Humor): Jocinda guesses the origins of the nicknames, getting them hilariously wrong.
Middle: (Surprise): Ava corrects her, explaining the real, often touching stories behind each nickname.
Ending: (Character Changes Radically): Jocinda realizes she has much to learn about these kids, prompting a change in her approach.

Scene 11
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
The team struggles with fundamentals, and Coach Jo’s CD plan meets skepticism.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment): The kids awkwardly practice basic skills, highlighting their lack of athleticism.
Middle: (Misinterpretation): Jocinda’s plan to have them watch a CD on hold to coach baseball with their parents is met with confusion and skepticism.
Ending: (Suspense): Jocinda senses her method isn’t working, leaving her searching for a new strategy.

Scene 12
INT. THE LOCAL TAVERN – AFTERNOON
Jocinda meets the eccentric Doc Cos, who offers an unconventional approach to coaching.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Jocinda sits at the bar, reviewing her notes, when Doc Cosmo Von Skin Phd peeks over her shoulder.
Middle: (Mystery): Doc Cos recites a poetic description of baseball from a physicist’s perspective, piquing Jocinda’s interest.
Ending: (Surprise): Jocinda realizes Doc Cos’s unorthodox methods might be exactly what she needs, sparking a new plan.

Scene 13
EXT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – DAY
Mr. Black observes nanobots connecting with neurons, hinting at a larger plot.
Beginning: (Intrigue): The scene opens with a close-up of nanobots through a microscope.
Middle: (Mystery): Mr. Black explains the technology’s potential, hinting at its experimental use.
Ending: (Suspense): The true purpose of the nanobots remains unclear, leaving us wondering about their impact.

Scene 14
INT. VITA SOLUTIONS VITAMIN COMPANY – DAY
Mr. Jones reveals Jocinda’s detective status to Mr. Black, who remains unconcerned.
Beginning: (Suspense): Mr. Jones nervously approaches Mr. Black, who is playing catch with a chimpanzee.
Middle: (Surprise): Mr. Jones reveals Jocinda’s detective background, but Mr. Black is unfazed.
Ending: (Uncertainty): Mr. Black’s calm reaction leaves Mr. Jones and the audience wondering about his true intentions.

Scene 15
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Coach Jo’s CD plan fails, but she wins the kids over with a chess analogy for baseball.
Beginning: (Humor): Jocinda’s CD plan backfires as parents and kids express confusion and disinterest.
Middle: (Intrigue): Jocinda pivots, comparing baseball strategy to chess, capturing the kids’ attention.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): The kids are intrigued by the new approach to learning baseball’s rules and strategies first, but Jocinda fears it might not be enough to make them successful players.

Act 2Scene 16
INT. AVA’S BEDROOM – EVENING
Ava is a little worried about TyRod, but a FaceTime call puts her at ease. During the call, we see a clean bedroom with TyRod folding clothes from the laundry.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ava’s FaceTime call to TyRod reveals him in a meticulously clean room, folding laundry.
Middle:(Uncomfortable Moment) Ava’s subtle probing about TyRod’s well-being leads to a tense moment where TyRod’s responses seem rehearsed and overly calm.
Ending: (Superior Position) As the call ends, Ava notices TyRod’s eyes briefly flick to the bedroom door, hinting at underlying tension.

Scene 17
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Coach Jo, with Doc Cos’ help, doesn’t teach batting stances; she teaches parabolas. She explains how the arc of a pitch follows a quadratic trajectory.
Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Coach Jo sets up an unconventional batting practice with a whiteboard outside the cage at the batting cages. She challenges them to come up with an algorithm to time the bat’s swing to meet the ball as it is pitched to them.
Middle: (Intrigue) The kids begin to understand the scientific principles behind batting, but they need the speed of the pitched ball to figure out the bat’s speed to hit it. When a police car shows up to lend Coach Jo a radar gun.
Ending: (Major Twist) Coach Jo is amazed as the kids figure it all out and showcase their newfound skills.

Scene 18
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
The pitchers are taught that the spin’s direction determines the lift force’s orientation.
Beginning:(Intrigue) Coach Jo gathers the pitchers and starts explaining the science behind different pitches.
Middle: (Mystery) The kids experiment with different spins, resulting in unpredictable and exciting outcomes.
Ending: (Surprise) The pitchers successfully throw complex pitches like curves and screwballs, to their delight and Coach Jo’s surprise.

Scene 19
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – DAY
Mr. Black and Mr. Jones meet again in the laboratory, where we see a pill-making machine being installed.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mr. Black and Mr. Jones enter the lab as technicians install a mysterious machine.
Middle: (Superior Position) The camera pans to reveal boxes labeled Vita Solutions, hinting at a sinister connection.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The scene ends with the machine starting up, foreshadowing the impending danger.

Scene 20
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – MORNIN
Mr. Jones picks up a new batch of vitamins from Mr. Black, along with a list of boys to take this new version.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Mr. Jones arrives at the lab, and Mr. Black hands him a box of vitamins with a list of names.
Middle:(Suspense) Mr. Jones questions the safety of the vitamins, but Mr. Black assures him everything is fine.
Ending: (Major Twist) The scene ends with Mr. Jones reluctantly taking the vitamins, his doubts evident.

Scene 21
EXT. AVA’S FRONT PORCH – DAY
Ava calls TyRod again because she is worried. This time, the audience will see the stark contrast between TyRod’s clean bedroom and the messy living room.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ava calls TyRod again, and after talking with her, he steps out of his immaculate room into a chaotic living room.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) TyRod’s father confronts him harshly, revealing his deteriorating state.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) TyRod’s emotional plea to his father to be more with him and not with them ends with him tossing Coach Jo’s CD onto the couch, which lands next to a picture of his mother and brother.

Scene 22EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
All the Twins’ baseball fundamentals are improving, kids are playing permanent positions, and their knowledge of the games has grown.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The team executes advanced plays on the field, impressing Coach Jo.
Middle:(Suspense) The kids discuss their newfound confidence and strategies during a break.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The scene ends with a pivotal play that showcases their significant improvement, hinting at future success. ( put the challenging Baseball scenario here for the team to figure out)

Scene 23
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Mr. Black is in the stands watching a different game, applauding sinisterly as a boy on vitamins makes a spectacular catch.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mr. Black arrives at the game, his presence creating tension.
Middle: (Intrigue) He watches intently as one of the boys on the new vitamins performs exceptionally.
Ending: (Major Twist) Mr. Black’s sinister applause as he grins, signaling his approval of the experiment’s progress.

Scene 24
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Jocinda sees the same catch and notices Mr. Black’s reaction, raising her suspicions.
Beginning: (Suspense) Coach Jo watches the game and notices a remarkable play by a boy on vitamins.
Middle: (Intrigue) She observes Mr. Black’s enthusiastic reaction, raising her suspicions.
Ending: (
Cliffhanger) Coach Jo decides to investigate further, sensing something is amiss.

Scene 25
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Mr. Jones gets Mr. Black’s attention and points out Coach Jo’s notetaking.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Mr. Jones nods to Mr. Black, subtly pointing out Coach Jo.
Middle: (Suspense) Mr. Black’s curiosity is piqued by Coach Jo’s detailed observations.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Mr. Black nods to Mr. Jones, indicating they need to keep an eye on her.

Scene 26
INT. JOCINDA’S RV – NIGHT
With a murder board on the wall, Coach Jo is trying to piece together the mystery involving Mr. Black.
Beginning: (Suspense) Coach Jo reviews her notes and evidence in her RV, determined to solve the mystery.
Middle: (Intrigue) She focuses on two boys whose performance mirrors legendary players, raising more questions.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jo decides to investigate Mr. Black’s background, sensing a major breakthrough.

Scene 27
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
After practice, Coach Jo asks the kids if they noticed anything odd about the other players.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Coach Jo gathers the kids and asks about unusual behaviors in other players.
Middle: (Mystery) Smitty and Drip provide crucial observations about their opponents’ subtle cues.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Coach Jo is intrigued by their insights and senses she is close to a breakthrough.

Scene 28
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Drip’s statement leads to comical banter and his admission of liking Izzy.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) The kids tease Drip about his observation, leading to banter.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Drip tries to deflect but eventually admits he likes Izzy.
Ending: (Surprise) Izzy’s reaction is ambiguous, leaving Drip and the others curious.

Scene 29
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – AFTERNOON
Mr. Jones visits Mr. Black, who is concerned about the side effects of the vitamins.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mr. Jones confronts Mr. Black about the side effects he has noticed.
Middle: (Intrigue) Mr. Black downplays the concerns, showing off the new vitamins.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Mr. Jones leaves, torn between his moral concerns and his loyalty to Mr. Black.

Scene 30
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – AFTERNOON
Mr. Black brings out a new chimp named Sandy, demonstrating her impressive abilities.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Mr. Black introduces Sandy, a new chimp, to Mr. Jones.
Middle: (Surprise) Sandy displays remarkable skills, impressing Mr. Jones.
Ending: (Major Twist) Mr. Jones, dazzled by the demonstration, momentarily forgets his ethical concerns.

Scene 31
NT. JOCINDA’S RV – NIGHT
Jocinda opens an email about Mr. Black’s menacing background.
Beginning: (Suspense) Jocinda receives an email with crucial information about Mr. Black.
Middle: (Intrigue) She reads about his sinister past, realizing the gravity of the situation.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jo decides she needs more evidence before taking action, raising the stakes.

Scene 32
INT. LITTLE LEAGUE BOARDROOM – AFTERNOON
Coach Jo hints at her theory to Mr. Jones, observing his reaction.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Coach Jo subtly confronts Mr. Jones with her suspicions.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mr. Jones’s nervous reaction confirms her theory.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jo realizes she is on the right track but needs to act carefully.

Scene 33
INT. STATS’ HOUSE – EVENING
Coach Jo has dinner with Stats and his mom, Debra, gaining crucial insights and realizing a potential love interest.
Beginning: (Suspense) Jo attends a thank you dinner from his mom, Debra, at Stats’ house.
Middle: (Intrigue) Stats provides key information with a few spoken words, a huge show of affection towards her, about the pinky twitch and wink, leading to a breakthrough.
Ending: (Uncertainty) After talking with Debra about the sexism in the world, Jo senses a possible romantic connection with Stats’ mom, adding a personal conflict. Before she leaves, she asks Stats for a favor.

Act 3
Scene 34
INT. WASHINGTON YARD – DAY
Coach Jo goes to her sister’s house, and Kofi wants to know why she is meeting with Doc Cos. When she confesses that he has been giving her tips on how to coach the team, Kofi is confused but happy she is asking for help. He then points out that asking for help is a step in the right direction for a new you.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Kofi questions Jocinda about her connection with Doc Cos.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Jocinda admits she’s been receiving coaching tips from Doc Cos, surprising Kofi with her openness.
Ending: (Superior Position) Kofi expresses pride, highlighting Jocinda’s personal growth in seeking help.

Scene 35
INT. WASHINGTON HOME – DAY
Coach Jo learns from her sister that the nanobots are a technological breakthrough and that Mr. Black must have cracked the code to bridge the gap to transmit information. The nanobots are programmed with great athletes’ movement and instincts that will interface with the neural network, accessing the muscle memory and instinctual responses. Once connected, the nanobots act as conduits, relaying the athlete’s expertise directly to the host’s motor neurons. This technology will revolutionize human potential. Imagine a world where anyone can perform at the level of a champion, breaking insurmountable barriers. She also learns that Mr. Black’s company makes the kids’ vitamins.
Beginning: (Suspense) Jocinda lays out what she knows about the vitamins and the kids.
Middle: (Mystery) Latisha fills in the blanks, explaining the full extent of Mr. Black’s plan with the nanobots.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jocinda realizes the ethical and moral divide between her and Mr. Black, unsure how to proceed. Scene 36

INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – EVENING**
Mr. Black reaches back into his past for help to eliminate Coach Jo.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Mr. Black contacts an old, dangerous friend.
Middle: (Betrayal) It becomes clear that Mr. Black’s old friend is a hitman hired to deal with Coach Jo.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The audience realizes Mr. Black has ordered Coach Jo’s abduction.

Scene 37
INT. JOCINDA’S RV – DAY
Coach Jo eats some crow and calls and explains her theory to Det. Sibowits. Det. Sibowits backs her play, and she gets him some vitamins for testing.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Jocinda struggles with whether to ask for help or go it alone.
Middle:(Character Changes Radically) She swallows her pride and calls Det. Sibowits explains her theory.
Ending: (Suspense) Det. Sibowits agrees to help and promises to test the vitamins.

Scene 38
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – DAY
Mr. Jones tells Mr. Black what Coach Jo knows about the secret program. Mr. Black reveals to Mr. Jones that it will not be a problem by tomorrow.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Mr. Jones reports Coach Jo’s discoveries to Mr. Black.
Middle: (Betrayal) Mr. Black nonchalantly indicates he has already taken steps to handle Coach Jo.
Ending: (Suspense) Mr. Jones realizes the depths of Mr. Black’s resolve, questioning his own involvement.

Scene 39
INT. WASHINGTON HOME – DAY
The vitamin analysis comes back. The vitamins are clean of any foreign matter, especially nanobots. Det. Sibowits tries to reach Jocinda but must leave a message. He contacts Latisha and gives her the bad news.
Beginning: (Suspense) Latisha answers the call from Det. Sibowits, expecting good news.
Middle: (Major Twist) Det. Sibowits informs Latisha the vitamins are clean, devastating their case.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Latisha fears they’ve been outsmarted by Mr. Black.

Scene 40
INT. JOCINDA’S RV – DAY
Latisha goes to Jocinda’s RV to see if she is there; no Jocinda, but she sees the murder board, and something dawns on her.
Beginning: (Suspense) Latisha searches Jocinda’s RV for her.
Middle: (Mystery) She studies the murder board, piecing together Jocinda’s clues.
Ending: (Intrigue) A critical insight dawns on Latisha, hinting at a breakthrough.

Scene 41
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
Coach Jo is late for the first game of the championship series, and everyone starts to worry. Doc Cos enters the dugout to help, and one of the other coaches supplies them with equipment. Stats gives Ava one of his notebooks, which Ava interprets as tips about Willie Mays, Hank Aaron, Ty Cobb, and a few other past greats’ weaknesses at the plate and in the field, and which tell coincides with which player, which she passes on to her pitchers. This information neutralizes their talent at the plate, and the Twins have a stunning win in the series’ first game.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Doc Cos introduces himself and barks orders to the team on how to manage themselves until Coach Jo shows up. Ava explains the insight the notes have on the other team.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) The team uses the tips during the game, initially struggling to implement them.
Ending: (Surprise) The Twins win, showcasing their brains over brawn.

Scene 42
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – NIGHT
Coach Jo wakes up and is tied up in a chair. She looks around, and she is in a laboratory. She sees Sandy and Willie playing catch and has to do a double take. Mr. Black comes into the Lab.
Beginning: (Suspense) Jocinda wakes up disoriented and tied up.
Middle: (Mystery) She sees Sandy and Willie behaving oddly, intensifying her confusion.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Mr. Black enters, revealing his presence and intentions.

Scene 43
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – DAY
Coach Jo reveals that the police are testing the vitamins as they speak. Mr. Black informs her that they are testing the placebo and will find nothing.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Jocinda asserts the vitamins are being tested by the police.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Mr. Black laughs, revealing they are testing placebos.
Ending: (Major Twist) Jocinda’s confidence shatters, realizing Mr. Black’s cunning plan.

Scene 44
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – DAY
They will not even find you! We have taken your RV, and you will have a tragic accident in it, probably because you were so depressed at the fact that you failed yet again because of your arrogance and history of not asking for help.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mr. Black details his plan to dispose of Jocinda.
Middle: (Intrigue) He mocks her for her history of not asking for help, deepening the wound.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Jocinda must think quickly to outmaneuver Mr. Black.

Scene 45
INT. SYNAPSE TECH SYSTEMS LABORATORY – DAY
Det. Sibowits and the whole Detective unit come bursting into the Lab, guns drawn. Latisha tested one of her friend’s vitamins, confirmed nanobots were laced in them and notified Det. Sibowits, who had just gotten off the phone with Mr. Jones, who had a change of heart for the kids and called in the information.
Beginning: (Surprise) Det. Sibowits and the unit storm the lab.
Middle: (Major Twist) Latisha’s independent test revealed the truth, catalyzing the rescue.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Mr. Jones’ change of heart and the new evidence put Mr. Black’s fate in balance.

Scene 46
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD – DAY
The championship game unfolds with the brainiac team playing against Mr. Jones’ team without Mr. Jones’ coaching or technological aid. They rely solely on their scientifically honed skills.
Beginning: (More interesting setting): The field is bustling with energy, with fans cheering and a tense atmosphere. The game starts with both teams on edge, showcasing the high stakes.
Middle: (Suspense): The game progresses with intense back-and-forth, each team giving their all. The brainiacs use their scientific strategies to counter Mr. Jones’ team’s traditional athleticism, creating nail-biting moments.
Ending: (Major Twist): Despite a close and intense game, the brainiacs clinch the victory with a brilliantly executed scientific play, which answers Coach Jo’s last problem-solving play scenario. The crowd erupts in cheers, and TyRod’s father, visibly cleaned up, stands and applauds his son proudly.

Scene 47
EXT. BASEBALL FIELD DUGOUT – DAY
The team celebrates their hard-fought victory, and Jocinda reflects on her journey, seeing her place as a coach and mentor firmly established.
Beginning: (Intrigue): The team gathers in the dugout, basking in their triumph. Jocinda watches them, a mixture of pride and contentment in her eyes.
Middle: (Character changes radically): The parents and community members join the celebration. TyRod’s father, now cleaned up, emotionally reconnects with his son, symbolizing a new beginning for both.
Ending: (Uncertainty):** Jocinda steps back, observing the joy around her. She feels a sense of accomplishment but is also pensive about her future. The scene ends with Jocinda looking hopeful yet contemplative.

Scene 48
INT. JOCINDA’S RV – AFTERNOON
Jocinda dismantles her murder board, symbolizing the resolution of her internal and external conflicts. Det. Sibowits joins her, marking a new chapter in her professional life.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Jocinda methodically takes down the murder board, each piece symbolizing a hurdle overcome. Det. Sibowits arrives, offering a silent nod of respect.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma): Jocinda and Det. Sibowits discuss her journey, the struggles she faced, and the growth she achieved. The conversation is heartfelt, showing her transformation.
Ending: (Cliffhanger):** Jocinda places the last piece of the board into a box, signifying closure. She smiles confidently at Det. Sibowits, hinting at new challenges ahead but with a renewed sense of purpose and strength. The scene fades out, leaving the future open yet promising.

• This reply was modified 11 months ago by  Michael Collado.

[Edward Lusk]

ED'S Fascinating Scene Outline
MY VISION is to be a bankable, reputable, and industry go-to writer who’s demonstrated how to entertain and hold an audience’s attention through unforgettable characters and stories that are as enjoyable to write as they are to watch.
What I learned doing this assignment is how to make every scene count and contribute to the overall story using the various interest techniques. Changing around techniques is a efficienct way to change the complexity of the scene without changing the storyline.

Scene 1
INT. DEPARTMENT STORE – FRAGRANCE COUNTER – DAY

Description: Howie Bellamy tries to manage a chaotic fragrance counter, fending off unruly customers with snarky humor. A gay couple refers to Howie as an "Elf," prompting a loud insult from Howie that catches the attention of nearby store Santa, Howie’s best friend, Jesús, and his helper elf, Jasper Frost. Jasper’s cheerful demeanor and magical antics unsettle Howie, leading to a series of humorous and chaotic events around the counter.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie Bellamy attempts to manage the chaos at the fragrance counter with snarky humor.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) A gay couple calls Howie an "Elf," leading to a loud insult that catches the attention of store Santa, Jesús, and his helper elf, Jasper Frost.
Ending: (Major Twist) Jasper’s magical antics cause a series of humorous and chaotic events, unsettling Howie.

Scene 2
INT. DEPARTMENT STORE – DAY

Description: Howie’s boyfriend confronts him, suspecting Howie of flirting with Jasper. The misunderstanding escalates into an argument, drawing the attention. Jesús, dressed as Santa, intervenes. Despite Jasper’s attempts to restore merriment, the argument culminates in Howie’s boyfriend breaking up with him, Jasper knocked on his butt, leaving Howie devastated. Howie finds a snowflake pendant lying on the floor and pockets it.

Beginning:(Suspense) Howie’s boyfriend confronts him, suspecting Howie of flirting with Jasper.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) The argument escalates, drawing attention, with Jesús trying to intervene and Jasper attempting to restore merriment.
Ending: (Major Twist) Howie’s boyfriend breaks up with him, leaving Howie devastated as he finds and pockets a snowflake pendant.

Scene 3
INT. DEPARTMENT STORE – SANTA’S CASTLE – DAY

Description: Howie sits on Jesús’ lap lamenting his life while Jesús, still dressed as Santa, provides sympathetic comfort jesting he will grant Howie his Christmas wish. Howie refuses a text invitation to go to his Grandparent’s Winterberry Manor. Jesús talks him into going as he has no better options.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie laments his life while sitting on Jesús’ lap, who is dressed as Santa.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Howie refuses a text invitation to visit his grandparents.
Ending:(Internal Dilemma) Jesús convinces Howie to go to Winterberry Manor as he has no better options.

Scene 4
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – NIGHT

Description:Howie and Jesús arrive at Winterberry Manor, where Howie is disappointed to find his favorite fireplace out of commission. Unaware of Howie’s arrival, the grandparents discuss the chimney’s significance and the children’s fable Grandpa Nick has been reading. Howie announces his arrival, only to be startled by Jasper emerging from the shower in a Santa hat and towel.

Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Howie arrives at Winterberry Manor and finds his favorite fireplace out of commission.
Middle: (Mystery) Howie’s grandparents discuss the chimney’s significance and the fable.
Ending: (Major Twist) Howie is startled by Jasper emerging from the shower in a Santa hat and towel.

Scene 5
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description:Howie reunites with his grandparents, Nick and Evie, who are thrilled to see him. Howie’s concerned about Jasper’s presence as a possible scam artist. They reminisce about past Christmases and try to lift Howie’s spirits. Howie’s reluctance to engage in holiday cheer is apparent, but his grandparents’ warmth begins to soften his cynicism.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie reunites with his grandparents, who are thrilled to see him.
Middle: (Suspense) Howie expresses concern about Jasper being a scam artist.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Howie’s reluctance to engage in holiday cheer softens as his grandparents reminisce and show warmth.

Scene 6
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HOWIE'S ROOM – NIGHT

Description: Howie unpacks his bags and discovers the snowflake pendant he picked up during the scuffle with Jasper. Curious about its significance, he examines it closely, sure it just glowed, inspiring a feeling of a strange connection. This moment deepens his intrigue about Jasper and the mysterious events unfolding.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie unpacks and discovers the snowflake pendant.
Middle: (Mystery) Howie examines the pendant closely, believing it glowed.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie feels a strange connection, deepening his intrigue about Jasper and the mysterious events.

Scene 7
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HOWIE'S ROOM – NIGHT

Description: Howie video calls his sister Grace, sharing the events of the day and his encounter with Jasper. Grace’s supportive and humorous responses help to lighten Howie’s mood, lower his suspicions, and provide much-needed encouragement. Their conversation reveals more about Howie’s past and his feelings about Christmas.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie video calls his sister Grace, sharing the day’s events.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Grace’s supportive and humorous responses lighten Howie’s mood and lower his suspicions.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Their conversation reveals more about Howie’s past and his feelings about Christmas.

Scene 8
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HALLWAY – NIGHT

Description: Unable to sleep, Howie wanders the halls of Winterberry Manor and encounters Jasper, who is also restless. They have a tentative conversation, sharing bits of their pasts and current frustrations. The encounter leaves both feeling a mix of connection and confusion.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie wanders the halls of Winterberry Manor and encounters Jasper.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) They share bits of their pasts and current frustrations in a tentative conversation.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Both feel a mix of connection and confusion.

Scene 9
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – KITCHEN – MORNING

Description:The next morning, Howie joins his grandparents and Jasper for breakfast. The atmosphere is light and filled with playful banter, but underlying tensions remain. Howie’s grandparents subtly encourage him to participate in holiday traditions, while Jasper’s presence continues to be both intriguing and unsettling.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie joins his grandparents and Jasper for breakfast.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) The atmosphere is light with playful banter but underlying tensions remain.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Howie’s grandparents subtly encourage him to participate in holiday traditions.

Scene 10
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – DAY

Description: Howie reluctantly helps his grandparents and Jasper set up Christmas decorations. Despite his initial resistance, he starts to enjoy the process, especially as Jasper’s whimsical nature brings out the fun. There’s a moment of closeness between Howie and Jasper, hinting at a growing bond.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie reluctantly helps with Christmas decorations.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Despite initial resistance, Howie starts to enjoy the process due to Jasper’s whimsical nature.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) A moment of closeness between Howie and Jasper hints at a growing bond.

Scene 11
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – LIBRARY – DAY

Description:Howie’s curious about Grandpa Nick’s book. He reads the children’s fable from the old book to Howie and Jasper about a magical chimney allowing Santa to use chimneys all over the world. The story, filled with magical elements, resonates with both Howie and Jasper, who see reflections of their own struggles within it. This moment strengthens their connection and sets the stage for the unfolding magical events.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie is curious about Grandpa Nick’s book.
Middle: (Mystery) Grandpa Nick reads the children’s fable, filled with magical elements.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) The story resonates with Howie and Jasper, strengthening their connection and setting the stage for magical events.

Scene 12
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – DAY

Description: Howie is suspicious of Jasper’s true intentions despite Grandpa Nick backing up Jasper’s story about being a caregiver. Convinced Jasper is a scam artist, Howie conspires with Jesús to uncover the truth, while Grandma Evie hints at the need for a traditional Christmas and asks Howie for his fabric piece to complete the family Christmas quilt Howie is unwilling to provide.

Beginning: (Superior Position) Howie is suspicious of Jasper’s true intentions despite Grandpa Nick’s reassurance.
Middle: (Intrigue) Howie and Jesús conspire to uncover the truth about Jasper, while Grandma Evie hints at the need for a traditional Christmas quilt.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie remains unwilling to provide his fabric piece, deepening the conflict.

Scene 13
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HOWIE'S ROOM – DAY

Description: Howie video calls his sister Grace, expressing his suspicions about Jasper and Grandma Evie’s cryptic hints. Grace advises him to calm down and participate in the family traditions, including contributing to the quilt. When Grace mentions their parents, Howie shuts down, revealing deeper family issues.

Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Howie expresses his suspicions about Jasper and Grandma Evie’s cryptic hints.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Grace advises Howie to calm down and participate in family traditions, but when she mentions their parents, Howie shuts down.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie feels somewhat reassured but remains suspicious.

Scene 14
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – DAY

Description: Jesús and Jasper decorate the manor, sharing holiday traditions and celebrating. Jesús subtly probes Jasper about his background, making Jasper’s vague references to needing to get back home more suspicious. Howie listens in, googling for clues, while conflicted by his attraction to Jasper and his determination to find out the truth.

Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Jesús and Jasper joyfully decorate the manor, sharing holiday traditions.
Middle: (Intrigue) Jesús subtly probes Jasper about his background, heightening suspicion with vague references.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Howie listens in, conflicted by his attraction to Jasper and determination to uncover the truth.

Scene 15
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – NIGHT

Description: Grandpa Nick announces that the storm is too bad for anyone to leave. Jasper hides his desperation by pledging to help make this Christmas the best ever, souring Howie’s disposition and making Jasper a target for his spite. Howie confides in Jesús, planning to ruin Christmas to drive Jasper away.

Beginning: (Suspense) Grandpa Nick announces the storm is too bad for anyone to leave.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Jasper hides his desperation and pledges to make Christmas the best ever, souring Howie’s disposition.
Ending: (Intrigue) Howie confides in Jesús, planning to ruin Christmas to drive Jasper away.

Scene 16
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – PARLOR ROOM – NIGHT

Description: Howie has a heart-to-heart with Grandma Evie, confessing his disillusionment with Christmas and his deep desire to rekindle his belief in heartfelt connections. Grandma Evie encourages him to let go of his hurt and participate in the family traditions. Howie agrees to help, albeit reluctantly.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie confesses his disillusionment with Christmas to Grandma Evie.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Grandma Evie encourages Howie to let go of his hurt and participate in family traditions.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie reluctantly agrees to help, revealing his inner turmoil.

Scene 17
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – KITCHEN – DAY

Description: Howie and Jasper bake cookies together, with Howie using the time to interrogate Jasper about his background and why he’s not home for Christmas. Despite Howie’s initial suspicion, he finds himself attracted to Jasper. Their conversation reveals Jasper’s personal rejection and Howie’s own Christmas morning rejection, deepening their connection but also causing tension.

Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Howie and Jasper bake cookies together, creating a cozy and intimate atmosphere.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Howie interrogates Jasper about his background, deepening suspicion but also attraction.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Their conversation reveals shared rejections, deepening their connection but also causing tension.

Scene 18
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – LIBRARY – DAY

Description: Howie has another heart-to-heart with Grandpa Nick, confiding that he deeply desires to rekindle his belief in magical, heartfelt connections. Nick reassures him that the true spirit of Christmas is about love and forgiveness. Howie starts to consider that maybe, just maybe, he can let go of his hurt.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie confides in Grandpa Nick about his desire to rekindle his belief in heartfelt connections.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Grandpa Nick reassures Howie that the true spirit of Christmas is about love and forgiveness.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie starts to consider letting go of his hurt, feeling a glimmer of hope.

Scene 19
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – DAY

Description: Jesús organizes a Christmas piñata party to lift everyone’s spirits. The playful event turns competitive, with hidden jealousy and attraction between Howie, Jasper, and Jesús coming to the surface. The fun ends in a huff as tensions flare, leaving Jesús to binge on the candy in frustration.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jesús organizes a Christmas piñata party to lift everyone’s spirits.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) The playful event turns competitive, revealing hidden jealousy and attraction.
Ending: (Suspense) The fun ends in a huff as tensions flare, leaving Jesús to binge on the candy in frustration.

Scene 20
EXT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – POND – NIGHT

Description: Overhearing Howie and Jesús’s argument, Jasper arranges an ice-skating date for them at the beautifully decorated Winterberry pond. Howie remains suspicious of Jasper’s motives, while Jesús enjoys the romantic atmosphere. Jasper, satisfied with his plan, returns to the manor to continue fixing the chimney with Grandpa Nick.

Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Jasper arranges an ice-skating date at the beautifully decorated Winterberry pond.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Howie remains suspicious of Jasper’s motives, while Jesús enjoys the romantic atmosphere.
Ending: (Intrigue) Jasper, satisfied with his plan, returns to the manor to continue fixing the chimney with Grandpa Nick.

Scene 21
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Jasper works on fixing the chimney with Grandpa Nick, expressing his desperation to get home before Christmas Eve. They discuss the significance of the Keystone Chimney and the magical pathways it controls. Jasper is worried that time is running out, adding urgency to their efforts.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jasper works on fixing the chimney with Grandpa Nick, expressing his desperation.
Middle: (Suspense) They discuss the significance of the Keystone Chimney and the magical pathways it controls.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Jasper’s worry that time is running out adds urgency to their efforts.

Scene 22
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – PARLOR – NIGHT

Description: Grandma Evie video calls Grace, reporting on Howie and Jesús’s progress. They discuss Howie’s readiness to learn the truth about his connection to the Keystone Chimney and their family’s Christmas legacy. Grace is worried it’s too dangerous, but Grandma Evie is confident Howie is ready.

Beginning:(Intrigue) Grandma Evie video calls Grace to report on Howie and Jesús’s progress.
Middle: (Suspense) They discuss Howie’s readiness to learn the truth about his connection to the Keystone Chimney and their family’s Christmas legacy.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Grace is worried it’s too dangerous, but Grandma Evie is confident Howie is ready.

Scene 23
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Howie and Jesús return from ice skating and startle Jasper, causing him to fall from a ladder and revealing his elfin features. Grandma Evie enters with hot cocoa and cookies, and Jasper confesses his true identity as a North Pole elf. Howie is initially angry at the deception but starts to understand Jasper’s predicament.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie and Jesús return from ice skating and startle Jasper, causing him to fall from a ladder.
Middle: (Major Twist) Jasper’s fall reveals his elfin features, and he confesses his true identity as a North Pole elf.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie is initially angry at the deception but starts to understand Jasper’s predicament.

Scene 24
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Jasper explains to Howie the significance of the Keystone Chimney and its role in Santa’s Christmas Eve journey. Howie learns that fixing the chimney requires an “enactment of the true Christmas spirit,” which only he can perform. Despite his resentment, Howie agrees to help, realizing the importance of the task.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jasper explains the significance of the Keystone Chimney and its role in Santa’s Christmas Eve journey.
Middle: (Suspense) Howie learns that fixing the chimney requires an “enactment of the true Christmas spirit,” which only he can perform
Ending:** (Uncertainty) Despite his resentment, Howie agrees to help, realizing the importance of the task.

Scene 25
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HOWIE'S ROOM – NIGHT

Description: Howie video calls Grace to discuss the “enactment of the true Christmas spirit.” Grace encourages him to embrace the task and reveals she knew about the family’s secret all along. Howie feels betrayed but realizes he must move forward for the sake of Christmas.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie video calls Grace to discuss the “enactment of the true Christmas spirit.”
Middle: (Major Twist) Grace reveals she knew about the family’s secret all along, leaving Howie feeling betrayed.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Howie realizes he must move forward for the sake of Christmas despite feeling betrayed.

Scene 26
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – LIBRARY – DAY

Description: Howie agrees to help fix the Keystone Chimney, realizing it’s his chance to heal and rediscover the true spirit of Christmas. Grandpa Nick declares that they will all chip in to figure out the solution as Christmas is at stake. The scene ends with a sense of determination and unity.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie agrees to help fix the Keystone Chimney, realizing it’s his chance to heal.
Middle: (Suspense) Grandpa Nick declares that they will all chip in to figure out the solution.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) The scene ends with a sense of determination and unity as they prepare for the task ahead.

Scene 27
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – DAY

Description: Everyone brainstorms clues from Grandpa Nick’s big book on Christmas magic. The fun halts when Howie watches a TikTok of his ex-boyfriend promoting a fragrance Howie created, pushing Howie to shut down and hate his life again. He storms off, committed to never loving anyone for anything ever again.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Everyone is hopeful as they brainstorm clues from Grandpa Nick’s book on Christmas magic.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Howie watches a TikTok of his ex-boyfriend promoting a fragrance he created, causing an emotional breakdown.
Ending: (Major Twist) Howie storms off, emotionally shutting down and vowing to never love again.

Scene 28
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HOWIE'S ROOM – DAY

Description: Jasper comforts Howie using a little magic to transform his room into what it was like when he was a child. Jasper explains that the “enactment of the true Christmas spirit” must be performed by someone connected to the North Pole, revealing Howie’s elfin heritage. Jasper confesses that he came back to Winterberry not just to fix the chimney but to find Howie.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jasper comforts Howie by transforming his room into a nostalgic childhood scene.
Middle: (Mystery) Jasper reveals that the enactment of the true Christmas spirit must be performed by someone connected to the North Pole, disclosing Howie’s elfin heritage.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Jasper confesses his true purpose in returning to Winterberry was to find Howie, leaving Howie conflicted.

Scene 29
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HOWIE'S ROOM – DAY

Description: Howie confronts Jasper about ruining his Christmas, revealing his frustration with being an elf. Jasper tries to explain his heritage, but Howie’s anger flares, causing Jasper to retreat. Howie is left alone, examining the snowflake pendant and wishing for love and happiness.

Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Howie confronts Jasper, expressing his frustration with his elfin heritage.
Middle:(Conflict) Jasper attempts to explain, but Howie’s anger causes him to retreat.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Howie is left alone, examining the snowflake pendant, torn between his desire for love and his resentment.

Scene 30
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – LIBRARY – DAY

Description: Howie confronts Grandpa Nick about his newfound heritage. Grandpa Nick tells the tale of the Bellamy family’s connection to Santa and the Keystone Chimney. Howie learns that his heritage has been kept secret to protect him and the family’s duty to preserve the chimney’s magic.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie confronts Grandpa Nick about his elfin heritage.
Middle: (Mystery) Grandpa Nick reveals the Bellamy family’s connection to Santa and the Keystone Chimney.
Ending: (Understanding) Howie learns that his heritage was kept secret to protect him, leading to a newfound understanding of his family’s duty.

Scene 31
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – DAY

Description: Jasper shows Howie his magical abilities, explaining that only true love can unlock Howie’s own magic. Jasper’s misuse of his magic brought him back to Winterberry to find Howie. Howie misunderstands Jasper’s intentions, questioning if Jasper is truly gay.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jasper demonstrates his magical abilities to Howie.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Jasper explains that true love can unlock Howie’s magic, revealing his own mistakes and intentions.
Ending: (Misinterpretation) Howie questions Jasper’s true intentions and sexuality, leading to further mistrust.

Scene 32
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – HALLWAY – DAY

Description: Jesús pushes his agenda to get Jasper home and out of the way. He believes Jasper’s presence hinders his chances with Howie. Jesús’s jealousy and desire for a deeper relationship with Howie come to the surface.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jesús subtly pushes his agenda to get Jasper out of the way.
Middle: (Conflict) Jesús’s jealousy and desire for a deeper relationship with Howie become apparent.
Ending: (Betrayal) Jesús’s true feelings and motivations are revealed, complicating his friendship with Howie.

Scene 33
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – CHRISTMAS EVE – NIGHT

Description: The Keystone Chimney mantel clock strikes 10 PM on Christmas Eve. Howie panics, torn between wanting Jasper to stay and needing to fix the chimney. He attempts various Christmas traditions, hoping one will enact the true Christmas spirit, but each fails.

Beginning: (Suspense) The mantel clock strikes 10 PM, signaling the urgency of the task.
Middle: (Desperation) Howie frantically attempts various Christmas traditions, hoping to enact the true Christmas spirit.
Ending: (Failure) Each attempt fails, leaving Howie in a state of panic and confusion.

Scene 34
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: They gather around the Keystone Fireplace, but Jasper’s attempt to exit via the chimney fails, leading to accusations. Howie, Jesús, and Jasper each blame the other for the sabotage. Grandma Evie suggests a new approach, focusing on the family’s unresolved issues.

Beginning: (Intrigue) They gather around the Keystone Fireplace for Jasper’s attempt.
Middle: (Conflict) Jasper’s attempt fails, leading to accusations and blame among Howie, Jesús, and Jasper.
Ending:(Uncertainty) Grandma Evie suggests a new approach, focusing on resolving family issues.

Scene 35
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Grandma Evie suggests they each contribute something meaningful to the family quilt she’s sewing as a symbolic enactment of the true Christmas spirit. Howie, Jasper, and Jesús each offer a personal item, and Grandma Evie sews frantically. Grace arrives just in time, bringing a fresh perspective on the chimney problem.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Grandma Evie proposes a new plan involving the family quilt.
Middle: (Symbolism) Each character contributes a meaningful item to the quilt.
Ending: (Surprise) Grace arrives with a fresh perspective on the chimney problem, renewing hope.

Scene 36
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT ROOM – NIGHT

Description: Howie’s parents arrive, and Howie introduces Jasper as his boyfriend, daring his parents to reject him again. Jasper is conflicted about staying or returning to the North Pole. Howie’s parents reveal their past actions were to protect Howie’s elfin heritage, not because he’s gay.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie’s parents arrive unexpectedly.
Middle: (Confrontation) Howie introduces Jasper as his boyfriend, daring his parents to reject him.
Ending: (Major Twist) Howie’s parents reveal their actions were to protect his elfin heritage, not because of his sexuality.

Scene 37
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Grandma Evie struggles to complete the quilt and handle the unresolved family rift, breaking down in tears. Howie realizes the weight of his resentments and decides to let go of his hurt. He gives Grandma Evie his vest piece for the quilt, symbolizing his acceptance and forgiveness.

Beginning: (Suspense) Grandma Evie struggles to complete the quilt under emotional strain.
Middle: (Emotional Breakdown) Grandma Evie breaks down in tears, overwhelmed by unresolved conflicts.
Ending: (Reconciliation) Howie decides to let go of his resentments, giving Grandma Evie his vest piece for the quilt.

Scene 38
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – LIBRARY – NIGHT

Description: Grace provides a fresh perspective, suggesting the enactment requires a special act of giving to recreate the memorable Christmas Eve with Santa. Just as they are about to try, Howie’s parents arrive, complicating the situation. Howie introduces Jasper as his boyfriend, daring his parents to reject him again.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Grace suggests a special act of giving to recreate a memorable Christmas Eve.
Middle: (Surprise) Just as they are about to try, Howie’s parents arrive, complicating the situation.
Ending: (Uncertainty) Howie introduces Jasper as his boyfriend again, adding tension and uncertainty.

Scene 39
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Howie reconciles with his parents, forgiving them for their rejection, understanding it was out of fear of losing him to the elf world. The Bellamys light candles on the mantel, symbolizing family love and unity, enacting the true Christmas spirit and bringing the magical chimney to life. Jasper is missing, causing concern as the mantel clock begins to chime midnight.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie reconciles with his parents, forgiving them for their past rejection.
Middle: (Symbolism) The Bellamys light candles on the mantel, enacting the true Christmas spirit and bringing the magical chimney to life.
Ending: (Suspense) Jasper is missing as the mantel clock begins to chime midnight, causing concern.

Scene 40
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Jasper returns, apologizing for needing to take care of something and unable to find his pendant. Howie realizes he must give up the snowflake pendant Jasper lost for him to leave. He places it around Jasper’s neck. Grandma Evie covers Jasper with the completed family quilt, and Jasper dissolves up the chimney as the clock strikes midnight.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Jasper returns, apologizing for his absence and mentioning the missing pendant.
Middle: (Major Twist) Howie realizes he must give up the snowflake pendant and places it around Jasper’s neck.
Ending: (Symbolism) Grandma Evie covers Jasper with the completed family quilt, and he dissolves up the chimney as the clock strikes midnight.

Scene 41
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – JESUS’S ROOM – NIGHT

Description: Howie seeks comfort in Jesús but discovers a note explaining he’s also had to depart, leaving Howie emotionally healed with his family but alone again. Howie’s acceptance of his family’s love and the realization that he can now move forward marks his growth.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie seeks comfort in Jesús’s room.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Howie finds a note from Jesús explaining his departure.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Howie accepts his family’s love and realizes he can now move forward, marking his emotional growth.

Scene 42
INT. DEPARTMENT STORE – RETURNS COUNTER – DAY

Description: Howie is back at the store, pleasantly processing returns. Someone hidden behind a gift-wrapped box approaches, revealing Jasper. Jasper asks Howie to come with him, and they leave the store together, opening a gift to find a snow globe of the North Pole. Inside the globe, we see Jesús at the North Pole having a fabulous time. He signals back to Howie the heart symbol and blows him a kiss. Jasper explains he made a deal with Santa for Jesús to switch places so that Jasper could return to the human world.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie is pleasantly processing returns at the store.
Middle: (Surprise) Jasper, hidden behind a gift-wrapped box, reveals himself and asks Howie to come with him.
Ending: (Symbolism) They open a gift to find a snow globe of the North Pole, where Jesús signals back to Howie, and Jasper explains his deal with Santa.

Scene 43
INT. WINTERBERRY MANOR – GREAT HALL – NIGHT

Description: Back at Winterberry Manor, Howie and Jasper receive the old book from Grandpa Nick, bestowing them as the new custodians of the magic chimney. This furthers their romance and newfound roles in preserving Christmas traditions. The scene ends with a sense of fulfillment and new beginnings. Howie and Jasper kiss under the mistletoe.

Beginning: (Intrigue) Howie and Jasper receive the old book from Grandpa Nick, bestowing them as the new custodians of the magic chimney.
Middle: (Symbolism) Their newfound roles in preserving Christmas traditions strengthen their romance.
Ending: (Fulfillment) The scene ends with Howie and Jasper kissing under the mistletoe, symbolizing new beginnings and fulfillment.

[hari messer]

Hari's Fascinating Scene Outlines!

My Vision: I want to write screenplays that enable me to work with like minded creative people in the industry to produce profound movies that will have a long lasting positive effect on the world.

I learned that… each scene should be designed using interest techniques for its beginning, middle and end.

### Scene Breakdown with Interest Techniques

—

Scene 1
EXT. FOG-SHROUDED FOREST – NIGHT

Two combatants fight over a fresh water spring. One is human, the other a strange reptilian creature. The reptilian pierces the human through the heart and kills him. We cut to Jamaica jumping up in bed, awakened by the nightmare.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): The scene opens in a fog-shrouded forest at night, with eerie silence and shadows hinting at hidden dangers, creating a tense atmosphere.
**Middle:** (Mystery): A fierce battle ensues over the fresh water spring, revealing that the combatants are not both human, but one is a strange reptilian creature, deepening the enigma.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): The reptilian creature kills the human, and we abruptly cut to Jamaica waking up from this vivid nightmare, suggesting a deeper connection to the conflict.

—

Scene 2
INT. MC BRIDE'S CAR – DAY

Colt McBride, a suspended cop, is driving into Jefferson with his new K9 partner, Jake. McBride is not a fan of Jake.

**Beginning:** (Uncomfortable Moment): McBride drives into Jefferson with his new K9 partner, Jake, visibly annoyed and grumbling about having to work with a dog.
**Middle:** (Internal Dilemma): McBride's frustration builds as he wrestles with his resentment over his suspension and his reluctance to bond with Jake.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): McBride looks determined as he drives into Jefferson, hinting at his resolve to make a fresh start despite his initial reluctance.

—

Scene 3
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Sheriff Del Beck stops McBride for a minor traffic violation. Their interaction reveals McBride’s suspension and Beck’s control over Jefferson.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Beck pulls McBride over for a minor traffic violation, creating an immediate tension.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): Their conversation reveals McBride’s suspension and hints at Beck’s authoritarian control over Jefferson.
**Ending:** (Power Dynamic Shift): The interaction ends with a tense standoff, establishing Beck as a significant antagonist and hinting at future confrontations.

—

Scene 4
EXT. JEFFERSON TOWN – DAY

McBride drives into Jefferson, noticing a strong police presence for such a small town.

**Beginning:** (More Interesting Setting): McBride drives into the quaint yet unnervingly quiet town of Jefferson, noting the heavy police presence.
**Middle:** (M. Intrigue): As he navigates through the town, he observes subtle but telling signs of an oppressive regime, such as nervous glances from residents and overly patrolling officers.
**Ending:** (N. Mystery): McBride's suspicion grows, setting the stage for him to delve deeper into Jefferson's unusual atmosphere and uncover its secrets.

—

Scene 5
EXT. JEFFERSON AIRFIELD – DAY

Daniel St. George, an alien investigator/charlatan, pilots his small plane into Jefferson for a speaking engagement.

**Beginning:** (Surprise): Daniel lands his small, rickety plane at the Jefferson airfield, immediately drawing attention from onlookers due to his eccentric entrance.
**Middle:** (Character Changes Radically): Daniel presents himself as a knowledgeable investigator, but subtle cues reveal his charlatan nature, leaving the audience questioning his true intentions.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): Daniel’s arrival and planned engagement generate curiosity about his role in the unfolding events, especially regarding his claims about aliens.

Scene 6
EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

The battle for control of Jefferson’s water supply is introduced. The town is deeply divided and on edge over it.

**Beginning:** (External Dilemma): The scene opens with a heated town meeting in the town square, with residents passionately divided over the water supply issue.
**Middle:** (Betrayal): A community leader reveals an alliance with the water company, sparking outrage and deepening the divide.
**Ending:** (Suspense): The meeting ends with tensions high, leaving the outcome of the water conflict uncertain and the town on edge.

—

Scene 7
INT. REAL ESTATE OFFICE – DAY

McBride has a run-in with Jamaica Daly, who is the real estate agent renting him a home for the summer.

**Beginning:** (Uncomfortable Moment): McBride enters the real estate office and has an awkward encounter with Jamaica, who is clearly not pleased to see him.
**Middle:** (Misinterpretation): Jamaica's cold demeanor leads McBride to believe she knows more about his past than she lets on, causing friction.
**Ending:** (Suspense): Despite the tension, Jamaica reluctantly agrees to rent McBride the farmhouse, setting up future interactions filled with potential conflict.

—

Scene 8
EXT. LAKE – DAY

McBride, hungover and fishing, discovers a dead body in the water. It morphs into a reptilian creature then back to human form.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): McBride, clearly hungover, attempts to relax by fishing at the lake, but his peace is short-lived as he spots a body in the water.
**Middle:** (Major Twist): As McBride approaches the body, it horrifyingly morphs into a reptilian creature and then back to human, shocking him.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with McBride scrambling to process what he’s seen, knowing he must report this bizarre discovery.

—

Scene 9
INT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY

McBride reports the incident to Beck, who is hesitant to investigate and implies McBride could be a suspect.

**Beginning:** (Uncomfortable Moment): McBride nervously reports the strange incident to Beck, who listens with skepticism.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Beck’s hesitation to investigate the case leaves McBride uncertain of Beck’s intentions and true motives.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): Beck subtly implies that McBride could be a suspect, leaving McBride frustrated and more determined to uncover the truth himself.

—

Scene 10
INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY

Against Jamaica’s strong opposition, her mother Evelyn rents McBride the old family farmhouse.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Jamaica argues vehemently against renting the farmhouse to McBride, creating a tense family dynamic.
**Middle:** (Internal Dilemma): Evelyn, caught between her daughter’s concerns and her own motives, reluctantly decides to rent the farmhouse to McBride.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): McBride moves in, aware of the tension and curious about the secrets this old farmhouse might hold.

—

Scene 11
INT. TOWN HALL – NIGHT

Evelyn invites McBride to hear Daniel St. George talk about Reptilian shape-shifters. McBride accepts.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): Evelyn extends an invitation to McBride to attend a talk about Reptilian shape-shifters, piquing his curiosity.
**Middle:** (M. Mystery): During Daniel’s talk, McBride listens intently, trying to connect the dots between his recent experience and Daniel’s theories.
**Ending:** (Suspense): McBride agrees to attend, setting the stage for him to learn more about the town’s strange occurrences and Daniel’s knowledge.

—
Scene 12
INT. MORGUE – NIGHT

McBride leaves midway through the presentation and rushes to the morgue to see the body from the lake. Both the body and the doctor are missing.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride abruptly leaves the presentation, driven by urgency to see the body at the morgue.
**Middle:** (Mystery): Upon arrival, he discovers both the body and the doctor are missing, deepening the enigma.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with McBride in the empty morgue, bewildered and more determined to find out what’s going on.

—

Scene 13
EXT. JUDGE’S HOUSE – NIGHT

The judge ruling on the water case is found dead. He is Jamaica’s husband. Jamaica asks Colt to investigate, not trusting Beck. Colt agrees, arousing his suspicions and interest.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride arrives at the judge’s house, finding it swarmed with police after discovering the judge dead.
**Middle:** (Internal Dilemma): Jamaica, distraught and mistrusting Beck, pleads with McBride to investigate, revealing her personal stake in the matter.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): McBride agrees to investigate, arousing his suspicions about the true nature of the judge’s death and the broader conflict.

—

Scene 14
INT. MAYOR’S OFFICE – DAY

McBride teams up with the locals, including Mayor Hal Burton, who sees McBride as a chance to challenge Beck.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride enters the Mayor’s office, where tensions run high among the locals discussing Beck’s control.
**Middle:** (M. Intrigue): Mayor Burton and the locals see McBride as their hope to challenge Beck, revealing underlying alliances.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): The meeting concludes with a plan to take down Beck, but McBride is left wondering who he can truly trust.

—

Scene 15
INT. REHAB CENTER – DAY

Colt, Jake, and Evelyn break the doctor out of rehab to reveal what he knows about the body. The doctor reluctantly reveals Beck’s involvement but warns of the danger.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride and Jake arrive at the rehab center, determined to get answers from the doctor.
**Middle:** (Betrayal): The doctor reluctantly reveals Beck’s involvement in the cover-up, deepening McBride’s mistrust of Beck.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): The doctor warns McBride of the dangers of probing further, but McBride is more determined to uncover the truth.

—

Scene 16
INT. TOWN HALL – NIGHT

McBride attends town meetings, interrogates the Water Board, and researches the conflict’s history.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): McBride enters the town hall, ready to question the Water Board.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): During the meeting, McBride’s persistent questions reveal more about the town’s dark history and the Water Board’s corruption.
**Ending:** (Mystery): The meeting ends with McBride’s growing suspicion, as the Water Board’s evasiveness hints at deeper secrets.

—

Scene 17
EXT. WATER FACILITY – DAY

Jefferson hires Saffron Rose, a hydrologist, to respond to the water company’s EIR. She teams up with Daniel.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): Saffron Rose arrives at the water facility, introduced as an expert to counter the EIR.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Saffron and Daniel begin their investigation, facing the challenge of countering the water company’s claims.
**Ending:** (Suspense): Their alliance solidifies as they uncover worrying data, hinting at a tough battle ahead.

—

Scene 18
EXT. HIGHWAY – NIGHT

Daniel and Saffron are stopped by Beck while driving. He threatens them.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Daniel and Saffron are driving when they are suddenly pulled over by Beck.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Beck’s threats create a tense standoff, testing their determination and resolve.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with Beck’s menacing warning, leaving Daniel and Saffron fearful but undeterred.

—

Scene 19
EXT. MOUNTAIN – DAY

Daniel flies Saffron up the mountain to look at the glaciers. His plane is sabotaged, forcing an emergency landing.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Daniel and Saffron take off, heading towards the glaciers.
**Middle:** (Major Twist): Mid-flight, they discover the plane has been sabotaged, forcing Daniel to make an emergency landing.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with them crash-landing in a remote area, unsure of their next move.

—

Scene 20
EXT. LAKE – DAY

McBride and Jamaica, on an excursion, embrace and almost kiss when she morphs into reptilian form and back.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): McBride and Jamaica share a moment by the lake, growing closer.
**Middle:** (Major Twist): Just as they are about to kiss, Jamaica involuntarily morphs into her reptilian form and back, shocking McBride.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with McBride’s stunned reaction, leaving their relationship in question.

—

Scene 21
INT. FARMHOUSE – NIGHT

McBride gets Evelyn to reveal everything about Jamaica’s heritage and the aliens’ need for the water ritual.

**Beginning:** (Intrigue): McBride confronts Evelyn, demanding answers about Jamaica’s true nature.
**Middle:** (Mystery): Evelyn reveals the history of Jamaica’s heritage and the aliens’ need for the water ritual, explaining the town’s strange occurrences.
**Ending:** (P. Uncertainty): The scene ends with McBride processing this revelation, unsure of what it means for his relationship with Jamaica and the town’s future.

—

Scene 22
INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY

The doctor calculates that Jamaica will lose her morph on July 4th. Jamaica decides to reveal herself at the celebration.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): The doctor explains the critical timing of Jamaica’s morph loss.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Jamaica wrestles with the decision to reveal herself, understanding the risks involved.
**Ending:** (Intrigue): The scene ends with Jamaica resolved to reveal herself at the celebration, setting up the climax.

—

Scene 23
EXT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY

Beck issues a warrant charging McBride and Jamaica with Solomon’s death. They are hunted by the police.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Beck issues the warrant, mobilizing the police to hunt down McBride and Jamaica.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): McBride and Jamaica evade capture, navigating the dangerous woods.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with them barely escaping, knowing the hunt is far from over.

—

Scene 24
EXT. ABANDONED BUILDING – NIGHT

Beck kidnaps Evelyn, threatening to kill her unless Jamaica turns herself in. Jamaica agrees, but McBride plans an ambush with Hal Burton.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Beck kidnaps Evelyn, using her as leverage against Jamaica.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): Jamaica agrees to turn herself in, but McBride secretly plans an ambush with Hal Burton.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with the ambush plan set in motion, tension high as they prepare for the confrontation.

—

Scene 25
EXT. MEETING LOCATION – NIGHT

Hal Burton is revealed as the alien in charge. He shoots Evelyn and threatens Jamaica. Jake attacks Burton, allowing McBride and Jamaica to escape.

**Beginning:** (Surprise): The ambush begins, but Hal Burton reveals himself as the alien in charge, shocking everyone.
**Middle:** (P. Uncertainty): Burton shoots Evelyn, escalating the danger and heightening the stakes.
**Ending:** (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with Burton threatening Jamaica, leaving her fate uncertain.

—

Scene 26
EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

They reach the stage just in time for Jamaica to morph in front of everyone.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): Jake attacks Burton, creating chaos and giving McBride and Jamaica a chance to escape.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): McBride and Jamaica race to the town square, pursued by Burton’s men.
**Ending:** (Major Twist): They reach the stage just in time for Jamaica to morph in front of the crowd, revealing the truth.

—

Scene 27
EXT. TOWN SQUARE – DAY

**Description:** A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica. As she lies dying, McBride figures out a way to make all aliens lose their morph and reveal their presence.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): A crazed person in the crowd shoots Jamaica, causing chaos and panic.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): As she lies dying, McBride works desperately to figure out a way to reveal all the aliens.
**Ending:** (Major Twist): McBride succeeds, causing all aliens to lose their morph and reveal their presence to the shocked crowd.

—

Scene 28
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY

Humanity unites to defeat the aliens. McBride and Jake ride off, back to the big city to face whatever lies in store for them.

**Beginning:** (Suspense): The scene opens with humanity uniting to fight against the aliens, showing coordinated efforts and battles.
**Middle:** (Intrigue): McBride and Jake, having played a pivotal role, prepare to leave Jefferson, reflecting on the ordeal and its impact.
**Ending:** (Hopeful Resolution): They ride off into the distance, heading back to the city, ready to face whatever comes next, leaving a sense of hope and new beginnings.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 4 weeks ago by  hari messer.

[Sunil Pappu]

Sunil Pappu’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!

My Vision: I’m a successful produced writer who specializes in female-led thrillers.

“What I learned from doing this assignment is… to use interest techniques to create fascinating scenes in my outline with a beginning, middle and end.”
OUTLINE VERSION VER 7
ACT 1
1. EXT. RIVER FRONT BUILDING – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria and her colleagues scramble onto a boat amidst gunfire, with armed men shooting to kill. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ria jumps in front of a colleague to save them, gets shot, and falls into the water, paralyzed by her fear of drowning. Ending: (Suspense) Ria's boat speeds away as she sinks, her colleagues unaware that she has fallen.
2. INT. FISHING BOAT – DAY
Beginning: (Mystery) Ria is revived by fishermen in a small boat, disoriented and in pain from a bullet wound. Middle: (External Dilemma) Ria realizes her pendrive, crucial to the mission, has dropped into the water and struggles with whether to dive back in or not. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria, weakened, searches frantically but ultimately collapses, fearing she has failed her mission.
3. INT. RAW BACK OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: (More interesting setting) Ria is in a cramped, cluttered back office filled with stacks of tapes and old equipment. Middle: (Suspense) She carefully listens to a recorded conversation, the room tense with the anticipation of uncovering vital information. Ending: (Major Twist) Ria plays back a crucial part of the recording to reveal an invasion plan by the PM of Pakistan.
4. EXT. AWAMI LEAGUE RALLY (EAST PAKISTAN) – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) The Awami leader steps onto the podium, and the crowd hushes in anticipation. Middle: (Suspense) The leader passionately demands civil rights, the crowd's energy intensifying even as police try to disrupt the proceedings. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The leader calls for a National assembly session, leaving the audience buzzing with anticipation and uncertainty about the government's response. (Uncertainty) Agitators provoke violence and the leader is arrested and escorted away.
5. INTERCUT – RIA’S DESK / RALLY
Beginning: (Superior Position) Ria listens intently to a tape, unaware of the real-time events at the rally. Middle: (Intrigue) As the rally progresses, the significance of what Ria is hearing becomes clearer. Ending: (Suspense) Ria realizes the rally's importance and the potential impact of the information she's uncovering, but she can't act immediately and relays the message to the boss.
6. INT. RAW CAFETERIA – DAY
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ria walks into the cafeteria, and her colleagues fall silent, casting suspicious glances her way. Middle: (Betrayal) Ria approaches the colleague she saved, expecting gratitude but is instead told to leave. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria leaves the cafeteria feeling isolated and dishonored, with whispers about her father's past echoing in her mind.
7. INT. RAW BACK OFFICE – EVENING
Beginning: (More interesting setting) Ria is in her cluttered office, attempting to find a moment of solace while calling her mother. Middle: (Uncertainty) Her mother urges her to come home, but Ria is torn between duty and family. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The call is interrupted by her boss, pulling her back into the mission's urgency.
8. INT. RAW WAR ROOM – EVENING
Beginning: (Suspense) The war room is tense as images of the Pakistani army's movements flash on the screen. Middle: (Intrigue) Analysts scramble to interpret the images and anticipate the next moves. (Misinterpretation) Chief secretary is unfazed by the news and tells RAW to focus on the capturing traitors within the country. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The realization hits that Operation Searchlight has begun, leaving everyone on edge about the immediate future. (Mislead/Reveal) Secy. Varma agrees with the chief secretary and wants permission for conducting an internal mission to train rebel forces who sought asylum instead.
9. INT. PAKISTANI NAVAL SHIP (FRENCH COAST) – NIGHT
SUPERIMPOSE: A FEW DAYS AGO, OFF THE FRENCH COAST
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram and his crew are ready to abandon the ship amidst chaos and lack of response from the Admiralty. Middle: (Mislead / Reveal) As they are about to leave, the radio static suddenly comes on, causing Vikram to run back in. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Vikram hears a crucial, barely decipherable message, forcing him to make a snap decision.
10. INT. BORDER CROSSING (ITALY) – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram nervously makes a call from a dimly lit phone booth at the border crossing. Middle: (Intrigue) Despite warnings about the call being tapped, he continues, revealing critical information. (Betrayal) Border patrol taps the call and surrounds the rebels Ending: (Suspense) Rehman covers up for Vikram and they are finally allowed to cross the border when the Indian Embassy staff steps in to vouch for them.
11. INT. RAW WAR ROOM – NIGHT
Beginning: (Intrigue) Varma lays out a strategic plan to support the rebels, capturing the room's attention. Middle: (Conflict) The Chief Secretary interrupts, questioning the validity of Varma's methods and team which consists of questionable characters. Ending: (Suspense) The room is divided, with the plan's fate hanging in the balance as tensions rise. (Misinterpretation) Varma downplays the mission to the chief secretary who thinks its an easy political win for him to oust Varma from the PM’s good graces. (Superior Position) Chief secretary knows it’s unlikely to succeed and gives Varma the go ahead on his suicide mission.
12. INT. VARMA’S OFFICE – NIGHT
Beginning: (Conflict) Ria confronts Varma in his office, questioning her role in the mission. Middle: (Superior Position) Varma reveals he has more faith in her abilities than she realizes, giving her a new perspective. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria leaves the office determined but with lingering doubts about her true capabilities after failure in her last mission.
13. INT. CAB – NIGHT
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) On her way to the airport, Ria’s colleague thinks it’s a good thing that she is being sent home when Ria tells her she is actually going on a secret mission. (Intrigue) Ria rides in a cab, reflecting on her new assignment as her colleague expresses skepticism. Middle: (Misinterpretation) The colleague believes Ria is being punished, which makes Ria doubt the true nature of her mission. Ending: (Suspense) As they arrive at the airport, Ria's resolve hardens, determined to prove herself regardless of her colleague's doubts.
14. INT. RAW SAFEHOUSE – NIGHT
Beginning: (More interesting setting) Varma enters a dimly lit safehouse, adding an element of danger and secrecy. Middle: (Intrigue) He discusses the mission with the rebel crew and Cdr. Vikram, their plans taking shape. (Character changes radically/Superior position) Vikram takes credit for their safe border crossing in private with Varma. Ending: Uncomfortable moment) Varma gives them instructions to start training as swimmers for their mission. (Cliffhanger) The meeting is abruptly interrupted by a noise outside, leaving everyone on edge.
15. INT. GAMBLING DEN (BOMBAY) – NIGHT
Beginning: (More interesting setting) Capt. Desai is seen gambling in a smoky, dimly lit bar, his mood darkening. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) A server hands him divorce papers, pushing him over the edge. Ending: (Suspense) Desai's anger spirals out of control, leaving him in a state of drunken despair and loses big. He refuses to pay and gets beat up and thrown on the street.
16. EXT. TEA STALL OUTSIDE FORT WILLIAM (CALCUTTA) – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Vikram has a camera case in hand and looks like a tourist. Ria meets Vikram at a bustling tea stall, exchanging covert glances and information. Middle: (Suspense) A police van suddenly arrives, arresting a Pakistani traitor and causing chaos. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The van leaves behind a trail of destruction, and Ria and Vikram are left to process the aftermath and its implications.
17. INT. BARRACKS (BOMBAY) – DAY
Beginning: (Conflict) Desai wakes up in the barracks, hungover and disgruntled. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) He's informed that his vacation has been canceled and he must report to a shipyard. Ending: (Suspense) Desai reluctantly leaves on his scooter and rides away.
18. INT. REFUGEE SHELTER (CALCUTTA) – DAY
Beginning: (intrigue) Vikram walks into the refugee shelter which has been turned inside out and disperses the crowd outside the traitor’s room to see Urdu fliers strewn on the floor and locks himself in the next room. Middle: (Surprise) Vikram pulls out a loose floorboard and takes out Urdu fliers similar to the ones next door and sets them on fire. End: (Superior Position) Vikram dismantles the camera case and assembles a portable transmitter. (Mislead/Reveal) he sends a cryptic message to the Pakistani Admiral. (Cliffhanger) As he finishes, he hears footsteps approaching, leaving him with no time to hide the equipment.
19. INT. SHIPYARD (BOMBAY) – DAY
Beginning: (More interesting setting) Desai walks through the eerie, decommissioned shipyard, meeting Varma amidst rusting ships. Middle: (Conflict) Varma outlines the mission, stressing the urgency and importance. Ending: (Suspense) Desai grudgingly accepts, his mind racing with doubts and the monumental task ahead.
20. INT. FORT WILLIAM (CALCUTTA) – EVENING
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria nervously reports to Varma, detailing her meeting with Vikram. Middle: (Uncertainty) She expresses doubts about Vikram’s loyalty, creating tension in the room. Ending: (Suspense) Varma listens intently but offers no immediate reassurance, leaving Ria’s concerns hanging in the air.
21. EXT. SPEED BOAT – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram speeds through the water, the disguised transmitter carefully hidden. Middle: (Intrigue) He navigates the boat skillfully, glancing around for any signs of pursuit. (Uncertainty) Vikram checks the new camera case that is his hidden transmitter radio and stops in the middle of the sea to send out a test signal. Ending: (Cliffhanger) As he nears the base, he spots a patrol boat in the distance, forcing him to make a quick decision.
22. EXT. MV PADMA – DAY
Beginning: (Uncomfortable moment) Ria is mistaken for the captain’s daughter and instantly connects with a young diver Lt. Rehman who apologizes for the insensitivity of his friends – the rebel crew. Middle: (internal dilemma) Ria looks down into the water as she gets off the ladder and her fear of water makes her lose her grip and slips losing her father’s ring (a keepsake). End: (Surprise) Lt. Rehman immediately dives in to retrieve the ring (Suspense) but gets close to the fins of the ship’s rudder blades.
23. INT. MV PADMA – DAY
Beginning: (Uncomfortable moment) Captain derides Ria publicly and (uncertainty) she retaliates to defend her father’s honor. Middle: (Character changes radically) Cdr. Vikram jumps in to pull Rehman out of the water. End: (Mislead/Reveal) Vikram privately lets him go with a warning telling him they are even now.
24. INT. MV PADMA/DECK – EVENING
Beginning: (intrigue) Ria tunes into other frequencies and decodes communications between merchant vessels – gets reprimanded by Capt. Desai for straying from the mission of interception naval communications. Middle: (External dilemma) Captain Desai assigns Ria with menial tasks while taking her off the duty at the radio station. End: (Internal dilemma) Ria swallows her pride to ask permission to carry a sidearm for protection but the captain refuses when she cannot provide any just cause.
25. INT. MV PADMA/CREW QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Uncomfortable moment) Rehman offers to do the menial job assigned to Ria but she refuses his help. Middle: (Uncertainty) Rehman stays with Ria and confides in her. End: (Hope) Ria, though still wary, begins to see a potential ally in Rehman.
26. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – NIGHT
Beginning: (Superior Position) Vikram sabotages the radio with a powerful magnet letting crucial communications slip through. Middle: (Major Twist) Capt. Desai gets secret orders to put Ria back on her station. End: (Uncertainty) Ria detects a technical glitch but her protests fare ignored and she missed a crucial communication.
27. INT. MV PADMA/DECK – MORNING
Beginning: (Intrigue) Desai receives a grim message about casualties resulting from the missed communication. Middle: (Conflict) He angrily confronts Ria, blaming her for the negligence. Ending: (Suspense) Ria is left feeling the weight of the blame and the crew’s suspicion, increasing the tension on board.

ACT 2
28. EXT. MV PADMA/TOP DECK – DAY
Beginning: (Conflict) Vikram announces an emergency drill under Desai’s orders. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ria, still reeling from the earlier blame, refuses to comply, causing a stir. Ending: (Suspense) The crew looks on, unsure of the consequences of her defiance.
29. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria monitors the radio, determined to prove herself. Middle: (Suspense) She intercepts a crucial message, her heart racing. Ending: (Cliffhanger) She deciphers the message, realizing its importance, and prepares to act.
30. EXT. MV PADMA/BELOW DECK – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Rehman encourages Ria as she prepares for the diving drill. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Rehman’s dangerous stunt nearly jeopardizes the drill, but Ria overcomes her fear and succeeds. Ending: (Conflict) Rehman is reprimanded for his recklessness, but the bond between him and Ria strengthens.
31. EXT. MV PADMA/TOP DECK – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram assigns Rehman an impossibly dangerous task. Middle: (Intrigue) Rehman struggles, his life hanging in the balance. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria intervenes just in time, saving Rehman and raising questions about Vikram’s motives.
32. INT. MV PADMA/VIKRAM’S OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: (Conflict) Vikram approaches Ria with a peace offering. Middle: (Uncertainty) He invites her to dinner, and she reluctantly accepts, wary of his intentions. Ending: (Suspense) Ria prepares for the dinner, uncertain of what to expect.
33. INT. MV PADMA/RIA’S QUARTERS – EVENING
Beginning: (Intrigue) Rehman sneaks into Ria’s quarters, gratitude evident on his face. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) He shares his family pressures, revealing his vulnerabilities. Ending: (Hope) Their bond deepens, giving Ria a sense of solidarity and support.
34. INT. MV PADMA/TOP DECK – EVENING
Beginning: (More interesting setting) Vikram and Ria sit on the deck, the sun setting beautifully behind them. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Rehman serves them, clearly uncomfortable with the situation. Ending: (Suspense) Ria remains cautious, aware of Vikram’s manipulative nature.
35. INT. MV PADMA/VIKRAM’S QUARTERS – EVENING
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria sneaks into Vikram’s quarters, intent on planting a bug. Middle: (Misinterpretation) Rehman, trying to help, accidentally spills wine on her dress, givng her an excuse to leave the dinner. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria hurriedly plants the bug and leaves, her heart pounding from the close call.
36. INT. MV PADMA/RIA’S QUARTERS – EVENING
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram barges into Ria’s quarters, but she’s not there. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) He inspects her radio logs before Ria comes in and he attempts to seduce her. Ending: (Conflict) Ria resists, maintaining her composure while internally seething.
37. INT. MV PADMA/RIA’S QUARTERS – EVENING
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria tunes into a frequency, listening to Vikram’s coded message. Middle: (Suspense) She deciphers part of it, realizing its importance. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria is interrupted before she can fully decode it, leaving her with fragments of critical information.
38. EXT. MV PADMA/LOWER DECK – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram leads a dive, the tension palpable. Middle: (Conflict) Rehman sacrifices himself to save Ria, but Vikram’s true nature is revealed as he kills Rehman and stages it as an accident. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Vikram blames Ria for the incident, intensifying her isolation and the crew’s mistrust.
39. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – EVENING
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Vikram publicly mourns Rehman, creating a somber mood. Middle: (Conflict) Desai harshly criticizes Ria, blaming her for the tragedy. Ending: (Suspense) Ria, feeling the weight of the blame, vows to uncover the truth.

ACT 3:
40. INT. MV PADMA/VIKRAM’S QUARTERS – EVENING
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria sneaks into Vikram’s quarters under the cover of night. Middle: (Intrigue) She searches through his belongings, finding incriminating maps and plans. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Just as she’s about to leave, she hears footsteps approaching.
41. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – NIGHT
Beginning: (Conflict) Ria decides to take matters into her own hands, planting false intelligence. Middle: (Suspense) She carefully crafts the message, aware of the risks. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The false intelligence is sent, leaving Ria anxious about the consequences.
42. INT. MV PADMA/CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Desai receives reports of civilian casualties. Middle: (Conflict) Ria realizes her actions led to the intelligence leak and the resulting deaths. Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ria is consumed with guilt, questioning her judgment and resolve.
43. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria decodes a merchant ship communication, her focus intense. Middle: (Suspense) She identifies a unique signature, realizing it’s her former colleague. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The personal connection with the enemy operator raises the stakes and complicates her mission.
44. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – DAY
Beginning: (Conflict) Desai hesitates but ultimately decides to act on Ria’s information. Middle: (Suspense) The divers prepare for their mission, tension high. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The divers set off, the outcome uncertain.
45. EXT. PAKISTANI NAVAL SHIPS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) The divers approach the Pakistani naval ships under cover of darkness. Middle: (Conflict) Vikram attempts to mislead them, but Ria’s quick thinking keeps them on track. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The supply ships are sabotaged, but the mission’s success hangs by a thread.
46. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Hope) Desai commends the crew for their success. Middle: (Intrigue) A small celebration ensues, but underlying tensions remain. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The relief is short-lived as new challenges loom on the horizon.
47. INT. MV PADMA/CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Vikram engages Desai with war stories, earning his trust. Middle: (Intrigue) Desai, relaxed and unguarded, shares his military codes. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Vikram leaves with the codes, his true intentions hidden.
48. INT. MV PADMA/VIKRAM’S QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram prepares to send a secret communication. Middle: (Intrigue) He uses the military codes he obtained from Desai. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The communication is sent, but the consequences remain unknown.
49. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Desai receives news of the enemy’s failure to retaliate. Middle: (Conflict) He requests to return to base, but Varma denies it. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Desai reluctantly continues on course, tension building within the crew.
50. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – EVENING
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria spends the day tracking messages, her focus unwavering. Middle: (Intrigue) She discovers military codes that implicate Vikram. Ending: (Cliffhanger) A private message from her enemy operator complicates matters further.
51. INT. MV PADMA/RIA’S QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria decodes a message in her quarters. Middle: (Conflict) The message reveals Varma’s complicity in defaming her father. Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ria feels lost and betrayed, her faith in Varma shattered.
52. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Intrigue) Vikram takes control of the deck, his intentions hidden. Middle: (Suspense) He turns on the ship’s beacons, signaling the Pakistani Frogmen. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The crew remains unaware of the imminent danger.
53. INT. MV PADMA/RIA’S QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Conflict) Ria angrily confronts Varma in her quarters. Middle: (Uncertainty) Varma deflects her questions, casting doubt on the source of her information. Ending: (Suspense) Ria leaves, more determined but with lingering doubts about her enemy operator’s role.
54. EXT. UNDERWATER – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) The frogmen approach the ship underwater, their movements stealthy and precise. Middle: (Intrigue) They plant mines, each action methodical and calculated. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The mines are set, and the frogmen swim away, leaving the ship in imminent danger.
55. EXT. MV PADMA/LOWER DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Conflict) Ria, overcome with despair, jumps into the water. Middle: (Uncertainty) She struggles with her fear, nearly giving in but ultimately deciding to fight. Ending: (Suspense) Ria surfaces, spotting the mines on the ship’s bottom, her resolve renewed.
56. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Security alarms blare as Vikram advises Desai to abandon ship. Middle: (Conflict) Vikram opens the guns cabinet, increasing the tension. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Vikram locks Desai in his quarters, the crew unaware of the betrayal.
57. INT. MV PADMA/CREW QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria gathers the crew, her determination clear. Middle: (Conflict) She delivers a rousing speech, urging them to fight and save the ship. Ending: (Hope) The crew, inspired by Ria, prepares to disobey orders and fight back.
58. EXT. MV PADMA/LOWER DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Vikram helps the frogmen board the ship. Middle: (Conflict) He jumps in to disable the communication lines, furthering his sabotage. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The communication lines are cut, and the crew is left in a precarious position.

ACT 4:
59. INT. MV PADMA/LOWER DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) The frogmen engage the crew in a fierce fight on the lower deck. Middle: (Conflict) The fight intensifies as the frogmen move stealthily towards the top deck without raising alarm. Ending: (Cliffhanger) The crew caught off guard struggles to fend off the frogmen, the outcome uncertain.
60. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – NIGHT
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria frantically attempts to send an SOS signal. Middle: (Conflict) She realizes the communication lines are down, her desperation growing. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria looks for alternative methods to send a distress signal, the situation growing more dire.
61. EXT. UNDERWATER – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria dives underwater, confronting the Pakistani frogmen. Middle: (Conflict) She finds Vikram cutting off cables and engages him in a fierce struggle. Ending: (Intrigue) Using a whistle, Ria sends Morse code signals about the imminent danger, hoping the crew will understand and act in time.
62. INT. MV PADMA/CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Desai receives urgent but incomplete communications about their mission’s true nature. Middle: (Conflict) He bangs on his door, desperate to be let out and join the fight. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Finally freed, Desai rushes to join the crew, the urgency of the situation palpable.
63. INTERCUT – SHIP DECK / UNDERWATER
Beginning: (Suspense) The battle rages on both the ship deck and underwater. Middle: (Conflict) Desai fights alongside his crew while Ria overpowers Vikram. Ending: (Hope) Ria ingeniously reconnects the communication lines, providing a glimmer of hope amid the chaos.
64. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria intercepts a top-secret message underwater, her focus intense. Middle: (Conflict) She deciphers it, realizing its critical importance. Ending: (Hope) Ria relays the message to Desai, the mission’s stakes becoming clearer.
65. EXT. MV PADMA/LOWER DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) Ria struggles to drag herself and the bound Vikram out of the water. Middle: (Conflict) She disables the last of the mines using an EMP signal, her determination unwavering. Ending: (Hope) The ship is saved from sinking, Ria’s bravery and quick-thinking averting disaster.
66. INT. MV PADMA/RADIO STATION – NIGHT
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria decodes the critical message, her concentration intense. Middle: (Conflict) She uses Desai’s military codes to ensure the message’s accuracy. Ending: (Hope) The message is successfully communicated to Varma, the mission’s success hinging on his response.
67. INT. MV PADMA/CAPTAIN’S QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (Conflict) Ria and Desai confront Vikram, demanding answers. Middle: (Intrigue) Vikram shares his motivations and ideology, the tension thick. Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ria reveals a radio leak implicating the true culprits behind Vikram’s sister’s assassination, leaving everyone stunned.
68. INT. MV PADMA/CREW DECK – NIGHT
Beginning: (Hope) Desai publicly recognizes Ria’s efforts, boosting her morale. Middle: (Conflict) The crew’s support for Ria strengthens, fostering a sense of unity. Ending: (Cliffhanger) A gunshot rings out from the captain’s quarters, and Vikram is found dead, leaving the crew in shock. He leaves a note with the location of the enemy operator.
69. INT. RAW HEADQUARTERS – DAY
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria and her mother attend the secret service, the atmosphere solemn. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Varma presides over the ceremony, honoring Ria’s father. Ending: (Hope) Ria feels a sense of closure and resolution, her father’s legacy restored. The enemy operator framed her father but now she’s been neutralized thanks to Vikram’s information.
70. EXT. PARADE GROUNDS – DAY
Beginning: (Hope) Ria stands with the rebel crew, the atmosphere respectful. Middle: (Intrigue) State honors are given to Lt. Rehman, recognizing his bravery. Ending: (Hope) The sense of unity and respect among the crew is palpable, reinforcing their bond.
71. EXT. CEMETARY – EVENING
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ria stands solemnly at her father’s grave, making a personal vow. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Capt. Desai joins her, recognizing her determination. Ending: (Hope) Desai salutes her grit, vowing to support her on future missions, their partnership solidified.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 4 weeks ago by  Sunil Pappu.

[Linda Kish]

Linda’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!
My Vision is: I will do whatever it takes to be a sought-after profound writer who has many successful movies produced and an Oscar on the mantel.
What I learned doing this assignment is this process helped me fill in blanks, think harder about what interest techniques will have the biggest impact, and work out some issues in the plot.

Scene 1
EXT. FARMHOUSE – DAY
Joaquin, a family man and scout for the cartel, is dealing with a typical issue with his kids while he races to a farmhouse.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Racing + drone overhead following him
• Middle: (Mislead) Arrives at a farmhouse while dealing with a family issue on the phone
• Ending: (Surprise / Reveal) The farm is a drug lab
Scene 2
INT. FARMHOUSE – DAY
He alerts the workers the Federales are coming. As they flee the lab, he blows up the evidence. Risks his life to help an elderly worker to his car.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting) Yells at workers to get out, take what they can
• Middle: (Dilemma / Suspense) Chooses to help elderly lab worker, risking capture
• Ending: (Major Twist) Just as they exit, Joaquin detonates the lab, providing a dramatic escape from the Federales
Scene 3
INT. NEW DRUG LAB – DAY
Joaquin’s friend, Brayden, reveals he tipped off the police. Dante, #2 in the cartel, kills him for his betrayal while Joaquin stands by helpless.
• Beginning: (Major twist) Brayden tipped off the Federale after a conversation he had with Joaquin about their mutual desire to get out of the cartel
• Middle: (Misinterpretation) Joaquin advises Brayden to keep low, mistakenly thinking it’ll keep him safe
• Ending: (Major Twist / Cliffhanger) Dante kills Brayden and orders Joaquin into his jeep
Scene 4
EXT. OPEN MEXICAN ROAD – DAY
Dante withholds their destination as another jeep, driven by Arturo, #3 in the cartel, joins them, carrying Joaquin’s family.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Where are they going and why?
• Middle: (Intrigue / Mislead) Tense conversation but ends calm, then…
• Ending: (Reveal / Cliffhanger) Another jeep pulls up, his heart sinks as he sees his family inside. Both jeeps take sharp turns off the main road.
Scene 5
EXT. RODRIGO’S COMPOUND – DAY
They arrive at the kingpin’s compound. Arturo helps Camila (Joaquin’s wife) out of the jeep, revealing personal dynamics. Arturo tells Dante that Tomas (Joaquin’s son) is a sharpshooter, Isabel (Joaquin’s daughter) is a livewire – a lot like her mother.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Arturo’s attentiveness to Camila hints at deeper intentions
• Middle: (Mystery) What does Rodrigo (the kingpin) want with them?
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Arturo’s locks eyes with Joaquin, a silent threat hanging between them as they enter the compound
Scene 6
INT. COMPOUND – NIGHT
Rodrigo, the kingpin announces he has a terminal illness and is kicking off a competition for his succession with points awarded based on how much they contribute to his infamy.
• Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Rodrigo calls out to Joaquin as he enters the room, putting him uncomfortably in the spotlight
• Middle: (Surprise / Internal Dilemma) The announcement of Rodrigo’s health and the competition shocks everyone + Joaquin grapples with it internally.
• Ending: (Major Twist) A courier drops off an anonymous note to Joaquin that says his family will suffer if he doesn’t participate. He doesn’t sign up.
Scene 7
INT. RODRIGO’S SITTING ROOM – NIGHT
Joaquin was Rodrigo’s deceased son’s best friend growing up and the kingpin insists he and his family stay until he dies. Joaquin’s father was Rodrigo’s #2 and died while protecting him.
• Beginning: (Suspense / Mystery) Rodrigo reminisces about Joaquin’s father and his son, hinting at undisclosed details about their deaths and Rodrigo’s loneliness
• Middle: (Character Changes) Rodrigo rants about the woman who killed his son.
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Joaquin is concerned about the note, but Rodrigo insults Joaquin that he’s too weak and would get killed if he signed up for the competition
Scene 8
INT. VEGA TEMPORARY RESIDENCE – NIGHT
An anonymous figure sneaks into the house, watches Camila in the bathtub.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Scene opens with a shadowy figure
• Middle: (Suspense / Betrayal) Watches Camila w/disturbing focus
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) She sees the shadow. Fearing for her sleeping children, she jumps out of the tub, but he’s gone. She can’t figure out how he got in or out.
Scene 9
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE / TUNNELS – NIGHT
Hearing what happened, Joaquin races to a trapdoor in the hallway and into the tunnels that he knew about from his childhood.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting / Intrigue) Accesses trapdoor and hidden tunnels
• Middle: (Suspense / Superior Position) Hears noises, hides, Dante unknowingly walks past, w/Joaquin silently watching, and now he has a suspect
• Ending: (Major Twist) While hiding, he finds C4, stacks of cash, and US military uniforms
Scene 10
EXT. COMPOUND – DAY
Rodrigo reveals Joaquin has been under his protection since his father died, as a promise he made to him due to his father’s loyalty. Isabel lashes out at Rodrigo, wanting to go home.
• Beginning: (Surprise) Joaquin learns about his protected status
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma / Intrigue) Joaquin struggles w/the new info, feeling both grateful, trapped, and terrified for what will happen when the kingpin dies
• Ending: (Uncertainty / Suspense) Isabel’s outburst shows family tensions are high, making their situation even more precarious as Rodrigo’s anger rises.
Scene 11
EXT. / INT. RESTAURANT – DAY
Arturo offers to take Joaquin under his wing and teaches him how to be violent so he is valuable to the organization.
• Beginning: (Mislead) They enter the restaurant and Arturo asks customers what they think of the food, then tosses it across the restaurant
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically / Reveal) Arturo beats Santiago, the restaurant owner, pushes Joaquin to help as he gives him pointers
• Ending: (External and Internal Dilemma) Joaquin is forced to cross his moral code
Scene 12
EXT. CAMPAIGN RALLY – DAY
Dante shoots up the rally, assassinates the gubernatorial candidate. While under fire, Joaquin helps the injured. Arturo brings him a baseball bat to use the next day for their shakedowns.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting / Major Twist) Unexpectedly opens fire
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Torn between fleeing and helping the wounded
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Arturo hands Joaquin a baseball bat to use next day for shakedowns, symbolizing the violence he must embrace, leaving him morally conflicted
Scene 13
EXT. SCHOOL – DAY
Arturo saves Isabel from an attempted kidnapping, deepening the complexities of his character.
• Beginning: (Surprise) Kidnapping attempt is sudden, throwing the school into a panic
• Middle: (Betrayal) Arturo intervenes heroically, conflicting w/his character
• Ending: (Cliffhanger / External Dilemma) Arturo warns Camila that Dante may have been behind it. He offers a bodyguard. What are his true motives and loyalties?
Scene 14
INT. RIVAL DRUG LAB – NIGHT
A cloaked figure blows up a rival drug lab.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Cloaked figure, uses thermal imaging to confirm no occupants
• Middle: (Intrigue) Sets explosives. Who is it and what is he doing?
• Ending: (Major Twist) Lab explodes in a fiery ball
Scene 15
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Points tally. Dante presents the heads of rivals and the gubernatorial candidate, earning a lot of points. Joaquin admits to blowing up the lab and enters the competition.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting / Uncomfortable Moment) Dante presents gruesome trophy, shocking the room and setting a brutal tone
• Middle: (Mislead / Reveal / Character Changes Radically) Joaquin declares he blew up a rival lab with a shaky voice that reveals his fear of what’s to come
• Ending: (Uncertainty / Suspense) His declaration hangs in the air as Dante flashes a cold smile, leaving uncertainty about his future actions
Scene 16
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – DAY
Camila confronts Joaquin about his involvement in the competition, fearing for his morality and their family.
• Beginning: (Betrayal) Camila throws a notebook he’s writing in, expressing anger and disappointment, papers fluttering like their fraying relationship
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Joaquin tries to justify his actions, torn between his role as a protector and the man Camila believes him to be
• Ending: (Betrayal / Cliffhanger) Camila walks away, leaving Joaquin alone, symbolizing a growing rift in their relationship
Scene 17
EXT. COMPOUND SHOOTING RANGE – DAY
Joaquin tries to earn points without bloodshed, but struggles. Rodrigo chastises him by shooting at his feet.
• Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Rodrigo hosts a gathering at the range, that includes Joaquin’s son, Tomas, who revels in the opportunity
• Middle: (Suspense) Rodrigo calls out Joaquin’s failures in the competition, shoots at his feet, causing Joaquin to “dance” to avoid getting shot
• Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Tomas is embarrassed by his father
Scene 18
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – DAY
On drone footage, Joaquin sees a payoff from Arturo to a Federale. He’s interrupted by a shooting sound which is coming from Tomas’s room.
• Beginning: (Superior Position / Mislead) Drone footage of Arturo’s shady dealings
• Middle: (Reveal) Tomas plays a cartel recruiting video game, which lights Joaquin’s ire
• Ending: (Betrayal / Major Twist) Joaquin reveals his father’s death was his fault – he was distracted by Joaquin’s decision to join the cartel against his father’s wishes. Tomas isn’t moved, leaving Joaquin to worry about his son
Scene 19
EXT. / INT. DANTE’S LAIR – DAY
Joaquin plants surveillance equipment (while workers pack fentanyl in crutches) but makes a narrow escape when his presence is detected.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Stealthily places surveillance devices, hinting at his clever planning
• Middle: (Surprise) Discovers a file with his name, revealing Dante’s close watch
• Ending: (Major Twist / Cliffhanger) Alert from his residence triggers near capture
Scene 20
EXT. TOWN – DAY
Joaquin’s family is safe, but they find flowers and lingerie in Isabel’s room with an anonymous note that it’s “a gift for our upcoming wedding night.”
• Beginning: (Suspense / Uncertainty) His family arrives home at the same time
• Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment / Mystery) Discovers the disturbing gifts, identity remains hidden, adding layers of threat
• Ending: (Suspense) Worried, implications looming
Scene 21
INT. RODRIGO’S SON’S ROOM IN COMPOUND – DAY
To gain favor, Joaquin lies to Rodrigo that they’re related.
• Beginning: (Mislead) Joaquin feeds Rodrigo fabricated story about how they’re related
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Rodrigo reacts warmly, rare vulnerability that contrasts his usual toughness. Shares that he can’t get over Maritza, now the Commissioner for US Customs and Border Protection, killing his son 20 yrs ago at the border
• Ending: (Intrigue / Uncertainty) Joaquin delves into a conversation Rodrigo would have wanted to have with his son, wanting to learn everything he can about how to run the cartel. Will the deception hold?
Scene 22
EXT. / INT. EXTRAVAGANT RESIDENTIAL HOME – NIGHT
Arturo alerts Joaquin to an impending danger against his daughter.
• Beginning: (Suspense / Major Twist) Arturo alerts Joaquin that his daughter, Isabel, is at a dangerous party at Dante’s brothers’ place and her bodyguard won’t go up against Luis for fear of retribution
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Joaquin arrives to a scream. Finds Luis, Dante’s brother, assaulting Isabel. Fueled by rage, he kills Luis, crossing his moral line
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Isabel clings to Joaquin, both relieved and terrified of the man he’s becoming, as is he
Scene 23
EXT. STEPS OUTSIDE THE COMPOUND – MORNING
Arturo tells Camila about Joaquin’s violent act, aiming to sever their bond.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Camila doesn’t know about the assault / murder
• Middle: (Betrayal / Internal Dilemma) Camila struggles with this image of Joaquin, torn between love and her horror at his actions
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Camila is in doubt, relationship teetering on edge
Scene 24:
INT. VEGA HOME – DAY
Camila confronts Joaquin, revealing her past with Arturo
• Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Joaquin learns of Camila’s past with Arturo – they were engaged to be married when he started engaging in violence with the cartel. She broke it off
• Middle: (Misinterpretation / Betrayal) Joaquin explains the details Arturo left out about Luis. He grapples with feelings of betrayal and deception
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma / Major Twist) Camila defends Arturo’s actions as protective
Scene 25:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Points tally. Joaquin’s transformation to violence causes Dante to take drastic measures.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Rival competitors part ways creating face off w/Dante after Joaquin killed his brother
• Middle: (Surprise) First time Rodrigo applauds Joaquin, awards him a chunk of points
• Ending: (Mislead / Cliffhanger) Dante orders his men to stop Joaquin
Scene 26:
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – DAY
Isabel snoops on her father’s computer. Sees he’s been tracking Arturo.
• Beginning: (Setting / Dilemma) Isabel in her father’s computer, to snoop or not
• Middle: (Surprise) Joaquin has been tracking Arturo
• Ending: (Uncertainty) What will she do with the knowledge?
Scene 27:
EXT. COMPOUND – NIGHT
Dante offers Joaquin a deal to quit the competition in exchange for his life and a role in the cartel – needs his brain to develop international strategy and agreements.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Dante’s men corner Joaquin as he tries to evade them
• Middle: (External Dilemma) Offers him the deal w/ a 24-hour decision deadline
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Scene closes on Joaquin’s contemplative face
Scene 28:
EXT. / INT. WAREHOUSE – NIGHT
Isabel overhears threats against her father, but is discovered.
• Beginning: (Internal + External Dilemma) Bodyguard says to stay in the car
• Middle: (Suspense / Major Twist) She sneaks into the warehouse / overhears Arturo discussing Dante’s offer to Joaquin and that it can’t happen
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) She’s spotted, escapes, directly in the path of a corrupt Federale
Scene 29:
INT. CAR – NIGHT
The Federale drives her away, her situation growing increasingly perilous.
• Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Believes the Federale is going to help her
• Middle: (Suspense) Realizes he’s not, tries to escape, locked in, panic rising
• Ending: (Betrayal / Cliffhanger) Law enforcement is going to kill her
Scene 30:
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – NIGHT
The Federale tells Joaquin and Camila their daughter is dead.
• Beginning: (Superior Position / Suspense) As Joaquin shares his dilemma with his wife, the Federale interrupts, delivering the devastating news of Camila
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma / Major Twist) Joaquin struggles between outright denial and the chilling possibility it may be true
• Ending: (Internal + External Dilemma) The Federale tells a concocted story of how she died, but Joaquin is skeptical
Scene 31:
EXT. CEMETERY – DAY
At Isabel’s funeral, sniper fire reigns down. Joaquin narrowly avoids assassination.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Arturo whispers to Camila, sowing seeds about Dante’s involvement in Isabel’s death. Joaquin tells Dante no deal.
• Middle: (Major Twist / Interesting Setting) As Joaquin approaches the coffin, sniper shots ring out, forcing him to dive for cover
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Joaquin realizes Arturo might be orchestrating this
Scene 32:
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – DAY
Joaquin reviews surveillance, discovering the truth behind Isabel’s fate.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Joaquin watches the footage, piecing together the events leading to his daughter’s death
• Middle: (Reveal) Sees her leave Arturo’s facility and drive away with the Federale, the one in which Arturo paid off prior
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) What is Joaquin going to do?
Scene 33:
INT. TUNNELS / FEDERALE’S HOUSE – DAY
Joaquin kills the Federale, crossing another moral line.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Sneaks through the tunnels, infiltrates Federale’s home
• Middle: (External + Internal Dilemma) Torn between justice and vengeance
• Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Executes the Federale, solidifying descent into the cartel’s dark world
Scene 34:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Joaquin presents the Federale’s head at the points tally.
• Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Joaquin throws the head on the table
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Stares down Arturo and Dante, his eyes burning with vengeance and purpose
• Ending: (Uncertainty) The room is silent as Joaquin’s challenge hangs in the air, everyone realizing he is now a formidable contender
Scene 35:
EXT. CENTER OF TOWN – DAY
Day of the Dead celebration turns into a reflection on personal losses.
• Beginning: (Mislead) Joaquin bonding with Rodrigo over their losses, but he says he can’t protect him from rival competitors
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Tomas comes to understand his father’s violent world, aligning his desire for revenge with his father’s cause
• Ending: (Suspense) Joaquin dissuades Tomas from acting rashly, fearing a cycle of violence that could claim his son
Scene 36:
EXT. BEACH – DAY
Arturo’s team kidnaps American celebrities’ and billionaires’ kids.
• Beginning: (Mislead) Beach day, fun in the sun
• Middle: (Major Twist) Chaos as gunmen storm, executing bodyguards, seizing children
• Ending: (Reveal) The children are taken away, their fate uncertain, as Arturo satisfied, heads back to town for Day of the Dead
Scene 37:
EXT. CENTER OF TOWN – DAY
Rival cartel seeks revenge for their lab being blown up and attacks at Day of the Dead with Arturo betraying Joaquin.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting / Mislead) Day of the Dead. Rodrigo ordered a moratorium on competition activity during the sacred day
• Middle: (Suspense) Rival cartel arrive guns blazing
• Ending: (Betrayal) Arturo sets Joaquin up and he’s almost killed again
Scene 38:
INT. Hospital – Day
Santiago tells Joaquin he and community members want to work for him, he needs protection to win. Joaquin accepts.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Santiago enters Joaquin’s hospital room with weapons
• Middle: (Major Twist) Santiago and a team want to protect Joaquin
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Gives Joaquin a gun, he’s the #1 target now of rivals
Scene 39:
INT. WAREHOUSE / INT. HOSPITAL – DAY
Arturo tortures the kids while videotaping them for ransom. Joaquin zooms in on his computer examining the video. As he does this the Commissioner for US Customs and Border Protection, Maritza, threatens the kidnappers with military action.
• Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Torture of the kids
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically / Internal Dilemma) Joaquin is overwhelmed by anger and disgust, then calms down and zooms in on the video
• Ending: (Suspense) Maritza threatens that if kids are not immediately returned unharmed, they will send military
Scene 40:
EXT. WAREHOUSE DISTRICT – NIGHT
Joaquin searches the district, which leads to a perilous chase. Santiago comes to his rescue.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) What is he looking for?
• Middle: (Suspense) He’s spotted and pursued
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Treacherous until Santiago comes to the rescue
Scene 41:
INT. TUNNELS / SANTIAGO’S RESTAURANT BACK ROOM – NIGHT
Joaquin prepares for a major assault and enlists Santiago’s help.
• Beginning: (Mislead) Joaquin enters tunnels empty-handed
• Middle: (Reveal / Surprise) Arrives at Santiago’s with night vision goggles, military uniforms, weapons, money to mail to Brayden’s wife and children, and a stack of letters which he asks Santiago to overnight one each day from outside of cartel territory.
• Ending: (Intrigue / Cliffhanger) If letters get into the wrong hands, he’ll be killed
Scene 42:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
A shocking turn of events as the Mexican President is assassinated on live TV.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting + Surprise) Broadcast starts as a standard warning to the US in response to Maritza’s warning, but with a hint of duress
• Middle: (Major Twist) As the Mexican President finishes his speech, Dante assassinates him, declaring his power and fearlessness
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Dangerous new era
Scene 43:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Points tally. Arturo asks if killing celebrity kids or using them as mules will get him more points. While this debate is going on, Santiago and his team free the hostages.
• Beginning: (Mislead) Rodrigo’s illness has progressed. Arturo is overconfident, gaining points for drawing international attention and receiving half the ransom already. Dante earns points for developing a new drug.
• Middle: (Character Changes) Santiago rescues the hostages and flips the script.
• Ending: (Suspense) Children are safe, but danger for Joaquin is far from over
Scene 44:
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – NIGHT
Joaquin prepares for a final, dangerous mission, leaving his family behind.
• Beginning: (Major Twist / Character Changes Radically) Joaquin packs (notebook, explosives) for a mission that could be his last, filled with resolve and sorrow
• Middle: (Intrigue + Mystery) Won’t tell them where or what he’s doing and what is in the notebook, but says he’s giving Rodrigo what he wants. Implores Camila and Tomas to stay safe, away from Arturo, his voice thick with emotion
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) What is he going to do and will he succeed?
Scene 45:
EXT. / INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – NIGHT
Arturo learns Joaquin freed the hostages. He confronts Camila, searching for Joaquin.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Knocks on the door, his intentions dangerous
• Middle: (Misinterpretation / Betrayal) Camila stalls. 1st he believes its her kindness, then realizes she’s stalling.
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Arturo’s anger grows, anxiety about what he’s going to do
Scene 46:
EXT. COMPOUND – NIGHT
Arturo orders a manhunt in the tunnels, but Joaquin has sabotaged the surveillance.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Arturo mobilizes his men
• Middle: (Superior Position) Joaquin’s foresight leaves Arturo blind to traps
• Ending: (Character Changes Radically) Arturo’s frustration mounts as he realizes Joaquin is always one step ahead
Scene 47:
INT. TUNNELS – DAY
Joaquin faces a deadly trap by Arturo’s men, but escapes.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Seemingly outgunned and outmaneuvered
• Middle: (Surprise) With a well-placed explosive he goes above tunnel
• Ending: (Major Twist) His phone is dead. Must get to the next tunnel entrance
Scene 48:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Points tally. Rodrigo tightens the deadline to 72-hours. Joaquin at a severe disadvantage.
• Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) On his deathbed and confused, Rodrigo wants to know where his “son” Joaquin is
• Middle: (Major Twist / Uncertainty) Joaquin’s chances slip away
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Joaquin must now race against time and his enemies to claim victory or face destruction
Scene 49:
EXT. OUTSKIRTS OF TOWN – DAY
Arturo enlists Dante and they set an ambush for Joaquin.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Coordinates a massive offensive
• Middle: (Major Twist) Forces converge, setting the stage for confrontation
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Joaquin knows it’s a trap, no way he can escape this
Scene 50:
INT. TUNNEL – DAY
Final stand involves a risky explosion at a critical juncture.
• Beginning: (Intrigue / Misinterpretation) Sets charges at a tunnel intersection, facing imminent capture
• Middle: (Suspense) Ensnares them, he seemingly sets it off too early
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Did he die?
Scene 51:
INT. VEGA RESIDENCE – DAY
Arturo notifies Camila her husband his dead, attempting to wield his power over her.
• Beginning: (Betrayal) Grim news. Arturo trying to sway Camila and her son to come live with him, he’ll provide for them and protect them
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Heartbroken yet skeptical, she struggles w/the news
• Ending: (Suspense) Unable to reach Joaquin, she faces an agonizing decision, surrounded by her enemies
Scene 52:
EXT. SANTIAGO’S RESTAURANT – DAY
Camila discovers Santiago’s restaurant overrun by Arturo’s men and Santiago is missing. She’s losing her support system.
• Beginning: (Interesting Setting) The restaurant is unusually quiet
• Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment / Major Twist) Discovers the violent struggle; Arturo’s men lurk, question her about Joaquin’s whereabouts
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Left without support, Camila feels trapped
Scene 53:
EXT. TUNNEL IN US – DAY
Joaquin emerges from the tunnel in the US only to be captured by immigration.
• Beginning: (Surprise) Crawls out the tunnel, only to be greeted by border patrol agents
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Asks for a phone, they refuse
• Ending: (Cliffhanger / Mislead) Taken to an immigration detention center
Scene 54:
INT. US IMMIGRATION DETENTION CENTER – DAY
Joaquin is flagged on a terror watch list, struggles to communicate his intentions to immigration officials.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Asks about his notebook
• Middle: (Reveal / Suspense) Demands to see Maritza. Time is ticking.
• Ending: (Uncertainty) Will she or won’t she come?
Scene 55:
INT. ARTURO’S RESIDENCE – DAY
Tomas storms out, not ok with this arrangement. Arturo consummates the relationship with Camila, but slips, says how incredible she looked in the bathtub when she first got to the compound.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Tomas wants to kill Arturo, but Camila reminds him of his father’s wishes
• Middle: (Misinterpretation) Arturo assures her he loves her, gets her to open up
• Ending: (Reveal / Betrayal) He reveals details of her in the bathtub and she realizes the extent of his deceit. She’s emotionally shattered as he consummates the relationship.
Scene 56:
INT. IMMIGRATION DETENTION CENTER – DAY
Maritza comes to speak to Joaquin as he tries to enlist her help with his plan.
• Beginning: (Suspense / Uncomfortable Moment) Maritza enters interrogation room, her face unreadable as she sits across from Joaquin
• Middle: (Intrigue) He asks if she received his letters, pleads his case for her to read the contents of his notebook
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma / Uncertainty) Should Maritza trust this guy? Leaves w/o any indication of her intentions
Scene 57:
EXT. IMMIGRATION DETENTION CENTER – DAY
Joaquin is escorted to another building by Maritza and a guard. An explosion…
• Beginning: (Suspense) Where are they taking him? He subtly checks his surroundings
• Middle: (Major Twist) An explosion…
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Amidst the smoke and confusion, his fate is unclear
Scene 58:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Joaquin returns just in time to confront his enemies in a dramatic showdown.
• Beginning: (Surprise / Reveal) Joaquin bursts in. Tomas blurts out what has happened, exposing Arturo’s manipulations – he set it all in motion, the competition, Joaquin’s family coming was all his idea, it was always about Camila.
• Middle: (Major Twist) Joaquin shows evidence of killing Maritza – all over the news and he’s the definitive suspect. Her death is what Rodrigo wanted most. Joaquin wins the competition.
• Ending: (Character Changes Radically / Cliffhanger) Rodrigo hands Joaquin his gun and asks him to put him out of his misery. Instead, Joaquin turns the gun on Dante, kills him as an explosion outside distracts everyone but Joaquin. He fires at Arturo, who flees.
Scene 59:
EXT. COMPOUND – DAY
Joaquin chases Arturo through the compound that Joaquin had pre-rigged with explosives and traps.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Navigate through traps and explosives
• Middle: (Surprise) Santiago joins the fight, but gets wounded.
• Ending: (Major Twist) Tomas shows up and the distraction almost costs Joaquin his life, but instead Tomas shoots and kills Arturo
Scene 60:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
Maritza comes out of the shadows and reveals she is alive to the dying Rodrigo, as she and Joaquin prepare to face new challenges.
• Beginning: (Reveal) As Rodrigo lies dying, Maritza steps out of the shadows
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically / Betrayal) She taunts Rodrigo with her survival and alliance with Joaquin, before killing him, marking the end of his era
• Ending: (Major Twist) Joaquin, now allied with Maritza, prepares to take control of the cartel, facing a challenging new future as they battle to dismantle the cartels from within
Scene 61:
INT. COMPOUND – DAY
A remorseful Camila is forgiven by Joaquin as they reconcile.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Camila apologizes but doesn’t say what she did
• Middle: (Betrayal) Knowing, Joaquin embraces her, forgiving
• Ending: (Intrigue) Together they look towards a future free from the shadows of Arturo, Dante, and Rodrigo, contemplating a new direction for the cartel and their lives

[Pat Fitzgerald]

Pat Fitzgerald's Fascinating Scenes Outline
My vision is to have fun completing this class with a contest-winning script that will establish me as a courageous and original writer.
What I learned: What a fascinating way to create fascinating scenes! This process helped my smooth out some plot conundrums, not to mention elevating the story. It took me longer than I thought it would, but the process was so necessary.

1. Beginning: (Intrigue) Tammi Jenkins stands next to an opened window, laughs. She can’t believe her husband was that stupid.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Off screen, voices shout that his head looks like a busted melon, all that blood, let’s get a photo for Instagram, etc.
End: (Radical Change) Tammi looks out the window, sees her husband next to a fallen ladder, head squashed. She screams for help.

2. Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Though she sobs uncontrollably, Tammi passes out refreshments to mourners at her husband’ss funeral.
Middle: (Intrigue) A strange woman, Violet Pankowski, tiptoes into the funeral home, goes to the closed casket and opens it to have a peek.
End: (Surprise) Tammi sees her, drops the tray of food and runs from the room.

3. Beginning: (Interesting setting) Violiet joins her old friend, Tammi, in the funeral home’s mortuary where bodies are laid out.
Middle: (Radical change) Tammi and Violet share glee that Tammi is free from her husband, and she got away with it again.
End: (Cliffhanger) Violet suggests that Tammi move into her retirement home, there’s lots of folks there who are sick of living. Their skills might be useful.

4. Beginning: (Interesting Setting) A ragtag group of senior citizens play old fashioned lawn darts, some blindfolded in a retirement village’s park.
Middle: (Intrigue) A moving van pulls up to a near-by house, an expensive car behind it.
End: (Surprise) A blindfolded man throws a dart that narrowly misses Tammi as she steps from the car.

5. Beginning: (Uncertainty) Tammi nervously fusses over a spread of food, not certain she should’ve made this move.
Middle: (Mislead) Violet wafts in, accompanied by a woman clutching an ugly matted dog. Violet introduces the woman as a good friend.
End: (Reveal) The dog takes a dump. The woman cries that the poor thing would be better off with someone who could take better care. Violet reminds Tammi about the folks who are sick of living.

6. Beginning: (Intrigue) Tammi peers out her window and spies pot plants above the fence of a home close to hers.
Middle: (Surprise) As Maynard Christensen tends his pot plants, Tammi peeks over the fence, waving a bong.
End: (Uncomfortable Moment) Tammi and Maynard sample his goods when Violet arrives, barely holding back her jealousy over Tammi flirting with her man.

7. Beginning: (Interesting Setting) Violet weaves her way through the blindfolded lawn dart game.
Middle: (Mislead) Tammi catches up with Violet, and catches a lawn dart that almost hit her head, apologies for not realizing Maynard is Violet’s SO. She just wanted to get high.
End: (Intrigue) Violet wants Tammi to accompany her to her “babysitting” job. This might be the place for their first so-called act of mercy.

8. Beginning: (Suspense) Tammi and Violet at the home of a man with dementia and his overburdened wife who announces that both she and the husband would be better off if he were dead. She leaves for a few hours of respite.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Tammi convinces Violet that the need to rearrange the home’s furniture while Dementia Man naps.
End: (Suprise) Dementia Man wakes, is confounded by the furniture change, falls down stairs and twists his neck. Tammi further twists it so the man will die.

9. Beginning: (Interesting setting; reveal; betrayal) In a cemetery above a high cliff, at Dementia Man’s funeral, Tammi openly flirts with Maynard.
Middle: (Radical Change) Violet arrives with Doggie Mom and Matted Dog. Tammi turns her back on Maynard and attentions to Violet.
End: (Surprise; Literal Cliffhanger) Violet slips on Matted Dog’s dump, causing a chain reaction with Tammi almost falling off the cliff. Violet saves her.

10. Beginning: (Intrigue; Mislead) Violet’s kitchen, Violet grabs for a bottle of pills that Tammi playfully holds above her head. Tammi insists she wants to be the one who has the pleasure of adding it to dog treats.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Tammi continues to mix dog treat ingredients, Violet, pissed at Tammi for taking over, holds a frying pan over Tammi’s head. Then backs down.
End: (Reveal) Tammi pretends to empty pills into the dog treat mixture, then turns a split second after Violet puts down the pan. They share a deadly smile.

11. Beginning: (Interesting Setting) Violet and Maynard in a hammock, in Maynard’s yard, sharing a doobie with Violet’s hands down below.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Violet tells Maynard that Matted Dog’s Days are numbered. It’ll be an act of mercy for the entire village.
End: (Uncomfortable Moment; Mislead) Maynard removes Violet’s hand from his nether regions, confesses to her that he hadn’t taken his Viagra, but his brow is wrinkled in worry.

12. Beginning: (Hope/Fear; Superior Position) Maynard pays Tammi a visit, tells her killing a dog is one step over. She better call if off or there will be consequences.
Middle: (Suspense) Tammi whispers in his ear. Maynard smiles, as –
End: (Superior Position; External Dilemma) Violet spies through a window at Tammi whispers to Maynard. She succumbs to the fact that this won’t be the first time they shared a man.

13. Beginning: (Interesting Setting; Mislead) Tammi visits Doggie Mom at her hoarder home, makes a big deal over Matted Dog, excuses herself to the bathroom. Matted Dog follows, because Tammi holds a treat out to him.
Middle: (Intrigue) Tammi passes Matted Dog out the bathroom window, then switches her pills for Doggie Mom’s pills.
END: (Superior Position) Hysterical Tammi runs to tell Doggie Mom that Matted Dog jumped out the window.

14. Beginning: (Suspense) Violet tries in vain to give Matted Dog a treat. It just growls at her.
Middle: (Surprise) A masked individual swoops out of nowhere, grabs the dog.
End: (Mystery) Violet stands helpless, watches Masked Person and dog disappear.

15. Beginning: (Hope/Fear) A village wide search for Matted Dog.
Middle: (Uncertainty; Mislead) Violet half-assed aids in the search and mutters to herself as to what’s wrong with the folks for caring so much for the dog.
End: Tammi consoles distraught Doggie Mom and suggests that maybe she should go home and take a happy pill.

16.Beginning: (Interesting Setting) Tammi and Violet join blindfolded lawn darts where there’s a discussion as to where is Doggie Mom, been missing for days.
Middle: (Superior Position) Tammi and Violet volunteer to check on her.
End: (Uncomfortable Moment) At Doggie Mom’s front door Tammi and Violet wrinkle noses, gag, puke. They smell dead Doggie Mom. She’s really ripe.

17. Beginning: (Intrigue; Surprise ) First responders remove Doggie Mom’s body from her home when a woman in an electric wheelchair skids to a halt next to Tammi and Violet.
Middle: (Suspense) Wheel Chair Woman laments that the body isn’t her, that Doggie Mom is the lucky one to be free of her life.
End: (Cliffhanger) Tammi and Violet share a knowing smile.

18. Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment; Misinterpretation) Under the guise of wanting Tammi helps Wheelchair Woman off of a toilet, then brushes out her gnarled hair.
Middle: (Intrigue) Tammi tampers with Wheelchair Woman’s wheelchair.
End: (Suspense) Wheelchair Woman loses control of the chair and whizzes into the blindfolded lawn darts game and is missed by a barrage of darts, only to be saved by Tammi

19. Beginning: (Superior Position) Tammi suggests taking Wheelchair Woman on a picnic, to cheer her up.
Middle: (Interesting Setting; Suspense) At the cliffside cemetery Tammi wheels Wheelchair Woman to the cliff’s precipice so they can enjoy the view.
End: (Surprise) Wheelchair Woman wheels herself over the cliff. Tammi watches the wheelchair land on a ledge, W. Woman bounce out of it and splat below.

20. Beginning: (Surprise) Maynard in his yard, shaves off Matted Dog’s fur when Tammi sashays in and complements Maynard for saving the poor doggie.
Middle: (Twist) While Tammi informs Maynard that everyone is at W. Woman’s funeral, she seductively strips.
End: (Superior Position; Betrayal) Maynard and Tammi have sex in the hammock. Violet peeks over the fence, turns purple with rage.

ACT 3

21. Beginning: (Betrayal; Intrigue) Violet tampers with Tammi’s brakes.
Middle: (Mislead) Violet leaves a box of candy at Tammi’s front door, with a note saying that it’s from Maynard.
End: (Twist; Superior Position; Suspense) Tammi opens her front door in time to see Violet skulk off, she looks to the candy, knows something is up.

22. Beginning: (Superior Position; Reveal ) Tammi passes around candy at the lawn darts game, coerces Violet to have some.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) A collective puke commences.
End: (Suspense; Intrigue) In the midst of the puke Maynard arrives to ask Tammi if he can borrow her car – whispers to her that Matted Dog needs his shots.

23. Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment; Superior Position; Suspense) A puke clean up is in full swing when Violet sees Maynard drive past in Tammi’s car.
Middle: (Surprise) Violet watches the car not stop at the stop light at the village’s edge, hears a loud horn.
End: (Twist; Suspense) A semi t-bones the car. Maynard flies through the windshield.

24. Beginning: (Uncertainty) Violet is unconsolable; Tammis stands stoic while Maynard loaded into an ambulance and her car onto a tow truck bed.
Middle: (Surprise; Uncertainty) Tammi yells for the tow truck to wait. She runs to her car, inspects the front seat, then the back.
End: (Intrigue) Off the tow truck bed, Tammi looks to a bush, hustles to it, stuffs something into her huge handbag and scampers off. She stuffs it into her huge handbag and scampers off.

25. Beginning: (Surprise) Party in Maynard’s back yard. The Lawn Dart Crew strip buds off Maynard’s pot plants, roll and light up to celebrate his life. Violet mournfully languishes in the hammock
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Police walk in. Lawn Darters panic until a cop reminds them that pot’s legal. Cops are looking for Tammi.
End: (Betrayal) Violet tells them exactly where to find her.

26. Beginning: (Surprise; Uncomfortable Moment) Violet walks alone across the lawn dart field when Dog appears from nowhere and latches on to her ankle.
Middle: (Radical Change) Tammi sashays to Violet, who can’t shake off Dog, asks if she’s happy not that she’d finally responsible for the thrill of the kill.
End: (Twist; Radical Change) Violet charges Tammi, Dog still latched to her ankle, and a knock-down, drag-out fight starts, in which they air all their conflicts over the years.
27. Beginning: (Suspense) The fight continues across the Village green, Dog now barking and running circles around the fighting women. Lawn Darters leave Maynard’s yard to watch.
Middle: (Surprise) A Lawn Darter recognizes Dog and a cheer rings out. Matted 9
End: (Suspense; Betrayal; Surprise ) Tammi tells Lawn Darters that Violet wanted the dog dead. Lawn Darters go quiet, until one suggests that the best way to settle differences is at a picnic. A giant Lawn Darter scoops Tammi and Violet under each of his arms.
ACT 4
28. Beginning: (Suspense) Lawn Darters lay out food on picnic tables and fawn over Dog when a car pulls up, driven by Giant Lawn Darter.
Middle: (Betrayal) While Tammi watches from inside the car, Violet limps out, reminds Lawn Darters that she had the ingenuity to bring Tammi into the community to get rid of the undesirables. Tammi’s nothing but a cold-hearted killer.
End: (Suspense) Lawn Darters remind her that Dog was loved, no matter how ugly, that Violet’s the one who wanted rid of it. Maybe Dog should decide who the villain is here.

29. Beginning: (Dilemma; Mislead) Tammi saunters from the car, suggests that maybe everybody can just get along, including she and Violet.
Middle: (Intrigue) Tammi scoops up Dog, who eyes and growls at Violet, pets it. Dog licks her face. She sweetly tells Dog to be nice to Violet, now.
End: (Literal Cliffhanger) Tammi sets the dog down. Dog charges Violet who limps backwards, toward the cliff’s edge. Tammi holds out her hand to Violet.

30. Beginning: (Mislead) Violet hesitates, but takes Tammi’s hand. Tammi smiles so sweetly.
Middle: (Reveal) Dog again clamps on to Violet’s ankle. Violet tips backwards. Tammi lets go of Violet’s hand, scoops up Dog. And kicks Violet in the gut.
End: (Not so surprising) Violet falls off the cliff.

31: Beginning: (Surprise) Violet on the ledge beneath the cliff, has landed in W. Woman’s wheelchair.
Middle: (Suspense) Violet looks up, sees Lawn Darters and Tammi staring at her happenstance. A Lawn Darter starts lowering a rope.
End: (Surprise) Violet stands to reach for the rope, but stumbles due to her wounded ankle. She falls to her death.

32. Beginning: (Twist) Tammi and the Lawn Darters retreat from the cliff’s edge and start the picnic. Tammi wants to know what everyone wants to do for fun now.
Middle: (Intrigue; Betrayal) Lawn Darters look to one another, crowd around Tammi and force her to the cliff’s edge. Confused Tammi pleads for her life. They tell her nobody else wants to die. They can’t trust her, so there’s only one thing to do.
End: (Betrayal) Tammi falls off the cliff.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Pat Fitzgerald.

[John Trimbach]

John’s Fascinating Scene Outlines
Vision: to sell 2 scripts within the next 12 months and get a manager.
What I learned doing this assignment is that AI does a remarkably good job of doing the beginning, middle and ending of each scene and numbering them.

Scene 1

Flashback with Narration:
A desperate sailor, Walter Egan, 33, leads his fellow sailors out of a West Congo prison by killing 3 prison guards. After coming ashore in their home port, Walter is feted with praise and ale. His grateful mates send him upstairs to Madame West’s where he spends the night with a young lass.
When Walter comes home in the morning, his wife, Helene, tells him she thought him dead and so she remarried a fellow named Percy. His stepson is a disagreeable 8-year-old, Morris, and Walter’s 18-year-old daughter, Laralee, has left home to escape Percy’s mistreatment. Morris shows an instant disliking for Walter.

Upon hearing Helen’s lamentations, Walter grows angry, gathers a few precious belongings, and leaves, never to see his wife again. One of the objects he takes is a doll he once bought for his daughter, Laralee, when she was 3, just before he left on his voyage.

Beginning: (Misinterpretation): Walter returns home and misinterprets the situation, thinking Helene moved on without him when he sees Morris.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Helene introduces Morris, creating tension and awkwardness as Walter realizes the full impact of his absence.
Ending: (Betrayal): Walter, feeling betrayed and angry, storms out, taking Laralee's doll with him, symbolizing his broken family ties.

Scene 2

EXT. DESERT HIGHWAY – DAY
Sheriff Walter Egan is in hot pursuit of car thieves. He trails them along a lonely desert highway that passes through town, a road notorious for drag racing. Walter closes in at breakneck speed as the car ahead nears a sharp turn. The car races ahead, swerves and flips over and explodes into flames. No survivors.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter chases the car thieves at high speed, creating a sense of urgency. Middle: (Surprise): The car thieves lose control, crash, and the car explodes into flames, catching Walter off guard.
Ending: (Mystery): Walter calls in the crash, noting it’s near the old Brown house, introducing an unsolved murder site. He’s shaking so bad he must take a drink of whiskey from a bottle hidden in his patrol car.

Scene 3

INT. BROWN HOUSE – DAY
Morris and Lara plan their move to confront Walter. They are mentored by Morris’ father Percy, a big shot in the government. Percy re-established contact with Morris when they discovered their mutual hatred of Walter.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Morris and Lara discuss their plan to lure Walter to isolate him, revealing Percy’s involvement.
Middle: (Mystery): Morris forges the land deed with Walter’s signature, aiming to incriminate him further. His secret: kill Walter, frame Walter for the killings, kill him and inherit the gold he discovered at a ship wreck.
Ending: (Uncertainty): Morris and Lara argue over their next steps, with Lara expressing doubts, leaving their plan in suspense. Lara just wants closure.

Scene 4

EXT. BROWN HOUSE –MOONLESS NIGHT
Two squatters sneak around the house, peering in the windows. Complete darkness. It seems nothing good happens at the Brown house, a somewhat dilapidated hovel whose owner remains anonymous.
Beginning: (Suspense): The squatters cautiously approach the Brown house, heightening the sense of impending danger.
Middle: (Mystery): They hear metallic sounds and see something glint in their flashlight beam before one of their faces splits open.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): The second man runs away but gets lost in the brush and is hacked to death, leaving the identity of the assailant a mystery.

Scene 5

EXT. BROWN HOUSE – DAY
Sheriff Walter and Deputy Clare investigate. They knock but no one answers. Walter considers having the property condemned.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter and Clare arrive at the Brown house to investigate, building tension.
Middle: (Superior Position): The audience knows Morris and Lara are inside, but Walter and Clare do not, creating dramatic irony. They are hiding in a secret chamber.
Ending: (Uncertainty): Walter considers having the property condemned, indicating his suspicion but also his uncertainty about what is happening inside. They leave to get a search warrant.

Scene 6

EXT. COURTHOUSE – DAY
Walter confiscates a bottle from a street person, keeps it for himself.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment): Walter takes a bottle from a street person, feeling guilty as he pockets it for himself.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma): Walter struggles with his alcoholism, internally debating whether to drink.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Walter ultimately takes a drink, showing his weakness and setting up future consequences.

Scene 7

INT. COURTHOUSE – DAY
The townspeople are frustrated and frightened. The new sheriff must solve these killings or get fired. They don’t have much trust in him.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter addresses the townspeople’s concerns, building tension around his ability to solve the case.
Middle: (Conflict): The townspeople express their frustration and fear, doubting Walter’s capability. A few hecklers.
Ending: (Suspense): Walter feels the pressure to solve the killings or face being fired, heightening the stakes. He makes a bold statement: if he doesn’t solve the murders in one month, he’ll resign. Some laugh at him.

Scene 8

INT. BLUE SEDAN – DAY Scene
Morris and Lara agree it’s time to spring the trap. They know that the sheriff can usually be found at the Still Moon Cafe this time of day.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Morris and Lara discuss their plan to lure Walter into the café and then create a disturbance.
Middle: (Superior Position): Walter hides a blackjack in his pocket.
Ending: (Suspense): They head to the Still Moon Cafe, setting up the next encounter.

Scene 9

EXT. /INT. STILL MOON CAFÉ – DAY
Lara and Morris just happen to catch Walter as he’s arriving. Morris and Lara sit in a booth, order coffee. Walter takes a seat at the bar.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter spots Lara and Morris walking into the cafe, Morris makes his move, shoving Lara to make sure Walter notices. It works – Walter follows them into the café.
(Superior Position): Walter catches Lara’s eye – she smiles at him warmly but he does not recognize her.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Morris feigns an argument, shoves Lara, attracting Walter’s attention.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Morris and Lara take off, leaving Walter to decide whether to follow them. He throws down a twenty and bolts.

Scene 10

EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY
Walter soon catches up to them, but as they approach the same curve in the road that caused the last accident, he backs off and loses them.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter chases after Morris and Lara on the highway.
Middle: (Intrigue): Walter hesitates as they approach the dangerous curve, remembering the previous accident.
Ending: (Uncertainty): Walter loses them, unsure of their next move.

Scene 11

INT. BLUE SEDAN – DAY Scene Description:
Morris can’t understand why Walter didn’t take the bait. They head back to the Brown house.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Morris and Lara discuss why Walter didn’t follow through with the chase. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Morris expresses frustration and doubts about their plan. Ending: (Suspense): They decide to return to the Brown house, preparing for their next move. Morris has a new idea.

Scene 12

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Morris consults with his father over the phone about what to do next. Morris wants to frame Walter for the killings and then stage his death – this would presumably solve the case and leave Walter’s. Lara has no idea. She’s in the bedroom reading a child’s book out loud.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Morris and Percy discuss the next steps in their plan.
Middle: (Conflict): Percy encourages Morris to frame Walter, adding pressure.
Ending: (Suspense): Morris decides to follow through with framing Walter, escalating the stakes. Lara’s innocence is evident.

Scene 13

INT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY
Early morning: Walter fills out paperwork in his office and talks to Clare about the Brown house and his fruitless efforts to track down the owner. Walter looks up county filings on the house and finds several issues with the chain of title. Walter decides to go out there and have another look.
Beginning: (Mystery): Walter discovers inconsistencies in the Brown house's ownership records.
Middle: (Intrigue): Walter discusses his findings with Clare, heightening the mystery. Clare’s ready to retire, wants to move to Montana to visit her daughter.
Ending: (Suspense): Walter decides to investigate the Brown house with a search warrant.

Scene 14

EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY
Walter has pulled over a speeder, a pretty blonde. As he stands by the driver side, Morris goes zooming by, coming to within inches of hitting Walter. That did it. Walter tears up the speeding ticket and jumps in his car. This time, he’s not getting away.
Beginning: (Surprise): Walter pulls over a speeder, adding to his daily routine.
Middle: (Suspense): Morris speeds by in his blue sedan, nearly hitting Walter, causing tension.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Walter gives chase, determined not to let him escape this time.

Scene 15

EXT. BROWN HOUSE/INT.SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY
Walter spots the blue sedan parked in the dirt. He jumps out of his patrol car and pounds on the door. No answer, only a faint sound of metal rattling. He walks to the side of the house and spots something moving on the horizon – it appears to be his man. Walter grabs his binocs from the car and peers out at the hot hazy horizon. He sees a wavy apparition of a figure fading away. Is he imagining this? Walter snaps out of it and notes the sun low in the sky. He radios Clare of his intentions to pursue the suspect on foot.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter arrives at the Brown house and sees the blue sedan, raising his suspicion.
Middle: (Mystery): Walter hears a faint sound and sees a figure on the horizon, unsure if it's real. Is the just the wind chimes, or is it something else?
Ending: (Intrigue): Walter decides to pursue the suspect on foot, heightening the tension.

Scene 16

INT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DUSK
Walter calls it in. Clare tells him that she is on the way for backup. She grabs her brick and heads out.
Beginning: (Suspense): Clare receives Walter's call for backup and prepares to leave. Grabs a flashlight.
Middle: (Intrigue): Clare considers the implications of the situation, worried about Walter. She opens his desk drawer, takes out a whiskey bottle and tosses it in the trash.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Clare heads out to provide backup, leaving her fate uncertain.

Scene 17

EXT. DESERT TRAIL – DUSK
Walter appears to be gaining ground on his man as the setting sun casts long shadows on the rock formations. Suddenly WHAM, he is knocked out with a blow to the head.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter tracks the suspect through the desert trail.
Middle: (Surprise): Walter gains ground, feeling confident he's close.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Walter is knocked out from behind, leaving his fate uncertain.

Scene 18

EXT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Deputy Clare arrives, notes Walter’s patrol car. She knocks on the door but no answer. The door is unlocked so she enters. It’s very dark. She shines her light across the main room. As the beam sweeps, a creature with strange eyes stares back at her. Clare unholsters but the shape is gone. She turns around to leave… and a flash of sharp metal rakes across her face. Blood gushes and partially blinds her. Clare runs right into thicket and becomes entangled. The creature goes silent. Clare doesn’t know where to aim her firearm. WHACK! She’s stabbed in the back. The creature finishes her off with an axe.
Beginning: (Suspense): Clare arrives at the Brown house and notices Walter's patrol car. Middle: (Mystery): Clare sees a flash of maniacal eyes, adding to the eerie atmosphere.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Clare is attacked and killed, a shocking twist.

Scene 19

EXT. DESERT TRAIL – DAY
Walter stirs, rolls over in the dirt – touches his aching head. He makes his way back to the house and discovers Clare’s body.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter regains consciousness, disoriented and in pain.
Middle: (Mystery): Walter stumbles back to the Brown house, trying to piece together what happened.
Ending: (Shock): Walter discovers Clare's lifeless body, heightening the stakes. He spots an envelope bulging from her pocket; he takes it out and reads it – a letter from her daughter.

Scene 20

INT. SHERIFF’S OFFICE – DAY
Now the FBI is involved in the investigation. Lead Agent Don Dunaway questions Walter but his story doesn’t add up. No car was found at the Brown House. Deputy Clare never mentioned seeing a car. Walter is asked about his drinking. He must be careful how he answers. Turns out the straw buyer document has his name on it – Walter is the official owner! Somebody (Morris) is setting him up.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter is questioned by the FBI, feeling the pressure mount.
Middle: (Conflict): Agent Dunaway presents evidence that implicates Walter, increasing the tension.
Ending: (Mystery): Walter realizes he's being framed, leading to his determination to clear his name.

Scene 21

EXT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Walter decides that he must clear his name before they take his badge. He goes back to the Brown house at night looking for clues. He walks in and instantly gets knocked out.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter returns to the Brown house at night, determined to find evidence. Middle: (Intrigue): Walter searches the house, uncovering unsettling clues.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Walter is knocked out again, leaving him vulnerable.

Scene 22

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Walter comes to tied up. He works on loosening the rope. Morris begins the interrogation about Walter’s past, pistol-whips him into a confession of sorts. Lara, listening intently, tells Morris to stop being mean. Lara describes what it was like to lose her father at 3 and her mother at 18. Walter tries to explain how he was waylaid and unjustly sent to prison and had to break out. Morris scoffs at this explanation and blames Walter for everything. He begins pummeling Walter to tell the truth and admit his guilt. Lara begs Morris to stop, announcing that she has something important to say. Morris stops. She looks at Walter’s bloody face and tells him a story about Madame West many years ago, about a young woman who worked there before she got her life together. And that woman was her. Walter looks puzzled. Lara explains that this woman ended up following this man to his house – her house. Lara tells Walter that she was the young woman and the man was Walter! At first, Walter doesn’t understand but then he remembers. He’s devastated – he had no idea. Lara wants closure, wants to know why he abandoned them. Morris, just as shocked as Walter, howls with laughter.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter regains consciousness, tied up and vulnerable.
Middle: (Conflict): Morris interrogates Walter, with Lara providing emotional backstory and a disturbing truth.
Ending: (Revelation): Lara has finally unburdened herself and her connection to Walter, shocking him and sending Morris toward deeper hatred. While Walter and Lara are emotionally involved in conversation, Morris sneaks out to the front porch.

Scene 23

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Walter works his hands free and tells Lara that he must go for help. He bolts out the front door but is caught by Morris holding a shovel. WHAM! Direct hit across the face. Walter gushes blood. Lara sees the hate in his eyes. He begins kicking Walter in the ribs. Lara must do something quick. She races to the back bedroom, and appears with June, her sister, her emotionally disturbed sister – scraggly hair, opaque blue eyes, long curvy nails. Walter thinks a minute – is June the killer?. Lara explains that keeping June deserves to be protected and the secret basement was the only way she could be kept safe. Lara demonstrates by opening the hidden hatch in the wooden floor.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter attempts to escape, creating a tense moment.
Middle: (Conflict): Morris is waiting for him, escalating the physical confrontation.
Ending: (Shock): Lara reveals June, adding a new layer of horror to the situation.

Scene 24

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Lara explains June’s long nails by saying her mentally compromised sister had to have a way to defend herself because she’s been tormented her whole life due to her mental state and because she’s partially blind. And especially now that she has taken human life. Walter is again floored – June is the killer! Now Morris must get rid of Walter – he knows too much.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Lara explains June's condition and defensive nature.
Middle: (Conflict): Walter realizes June is the killer, adding to his shock and desperation. Ending: (Suspense): Morris decides Walter must be eliminated, raising the stakes.

Scene 25

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Walter asks why Lara kept this a secret all those years. Lara pauses, and then reveals her deepest darkest secret – June is her sister and her daughter. Walter is puzzled but then his face registers shock – he finally gets it. He is overcome with grief and despair. Morris howls with laughter.
Beginning: (Suspense): Walter questions Lara about keeping the secret.
Middle: (Revelation): Lara reveals the truth about June, shocking Walter.
Ending: (Conflict): Morris's reaction intensifies the situation, adding to the chaos.

Scene 26

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Walter finally breaks free from the rope and a fight to the death ensues.
Walter is losing badly. This greatly agitates June. She screams.
Beginning: (Action): Walter breaks free and initiates a fight with Morris.
Middle: (Suspense): Walter struggles, appearing to lose the fight.
Ending: (Tension): June becomes agitated, adding to the chaos and uncertainty. Lara tries to calm her down, grabs her ams.

Scene 27

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
But it’s not working. June bolts towards Morris, knocking over an oil lamp. It rolls to the open floor hatch and falls in. A fire erupts down below in June’s quarters.
Beginning: (Suspense): June's agitation leads to a critical moment.
Middle: (Action): June knocks over an oil lamp, starting a fire in the secret chamber.
Ending: (Tension): The fire spreads quickly throughout the foundation.

Scene 28

INT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
Morris comes at Walter with a knife to finish him off but June moves in a flash. She lunges at Morris and they struggle. Morris accidently cuts her with a knife. June pivots and lunges at Morris, the momentum carrying both of them to the open hatch just as the fire roars through the floor collapsing much of it. Lara loses her footing and flames eat at her feet. Walter pulls her out and the two of them barely escape.
Beginning: (Suspense): Morris attempts to kill Walter with a knife.
Middle: (Action): June intervenes, causing both of them to fall into the fire.
Ending: (Tension): Walter and Lara barely escape the collapsing house.

Scene 29

EXT. BROWN HOUSE – NIGHT
The Brown house quickly becomes a torrent of flames. Walter and Margaret leave the burning house, arm in arm.
Beginning: (Suspense): The Brown house is engulfed in flames, creating a dramatic escape. Middle: (Action): Walter and Lara struggle to escape the burning house.
Ending: (Resolution): They manage to leave the house, arm in arm, signaling a new beginning.

Scene 30

Slugline: INT. WALTER’S HOUSE – DAY Scene Description:
Walter and Mara (Lara having renamed herself) are having friends over for a cookout: Don Dunaway arrives with his 32-year-old brother, Ron.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter and Mara host a cookout, creating a moment of peace.
Middle: (Conflict): Don Dunaway arrives, bringing closure to the investigation.
Ending: (Resolution): Mara and Ron connect, hinting at future possibilities.

Scene 31

INT. WALTER’S HOUSE – DAY
Don informs Walter that the investigation is officially over. They’ve identified Morris as the man who forged the house documents to make it look like Walter was the owner and was probably the killer.
Beginning: (Resolution): Don informs Walter about the conclusion of the investigation.
Middle: (Intrigue): The revelation about Morris's forgery is revealed.
Ending: (Closure): Walter is cleared of suspicion, bringing a sense of relief.

Scene 32

INT. WALTER’S HOUSE – DAY
Mara looks up at the mantle and the toy doll that Walter gave her so long ago.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Mara notices the toy doll on the mantle, symbolizing her past.
Middle: (Reflection): Mara reflects on her journey and her relationship with her father.
Ending: (Resolution): The doll signifies the healing of their relationship.

Scene 33

INT. WALTER’S HOUSE – DAY
Walter and Don discover they were both seafaring shipmates early in their careers and they begin swapping sea stories.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Walter and Don realize their shared past as seafaring shipmates.
Middle: (Connection): They bond over swapping sea stories, strengthening their friendship. Ending: (Resolution): Their conversation signifies new beginnings and mutual respect.

Scene 34

INT. WALTER’S HOUSE – DAY Scene
Ron’s eyes are fixed on Mara. She smiles. He smiles back.
Beginning: (Intrigue): Ron is captivated by Mara, hinting at a new connection.
Middle: (Connection): Mara responds positively, suggesting mutual interest.
Ending: (Hope): Their smiles hint at the possibility of a future relationship.

Scene 35

FADE OUT

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  John Trimbach.
• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  John Trimbach.

[Kathryn Gould]

Kathryn’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!
I choose to be a highly creative and energized writer who makes big movies and loves her life working with the most creative people in the world.
What I learned: Envisioning the beginning, middle and end of a scene each with a different interest technique is a great way to start visualizing my individual scenes and will make them fun to write and gripping for the reader.

Act 1:
1. INT/EXT. MEDINANO ENTRANCE – DAY
Beginning – (Intrigue) Gleaming buildings in a perfect city, follow three uniformed waste workers as they push a large empty trash bin toward an entrance, they glance nervously at cameras and the guns carried by the security personnel. Inside, we see that it’s a security checkpoint.
Middle – (Uncomfortable Moment/ Mislead) As they stand in line, the waste workers (two young men (22, 18) and a young woman (16)) stare straight ahead, seem perfectly calm. But the young woman (Nell) nervously taps her ID card against the side of her leg. The older of the two young men (Japheth) stops the tapping. It’s their turn. The security guards make fun of Japheth’s thick glasses. The three remain silent.
End – (Suspense) The security guards scrutinize the three more than others, but let them pass.
2. INT. MEDINANO HALLWAY/ SERVER ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Reveal) They roll their cart through the hallways, watching the cameras – we see through Japheth’s thick glasses and realize they are a high-tech device feeding him information about the facility. They take a sudden turn.
Middle: (Intrigue) They hide in a server room. Their cart has a false bottom from which they retrieve new uniforms and supplies, change.
End: (Suspense) Nell, dressed as a lab worker, connects to one of the servers and hides. Olly dresses as a security guard and stations himself outside the door. Japheth, in a lab coat, heads down the hall.
3. INT. MEDINANO GARBAGE CHUTES/AIR DUCTS – DAY
Beginning: (Surprise) Japheth enters a restroom, goes into a stall. Then stands on the toilet, pulls out a ceiling tile, and leaps (inhumanly) into the ceiling and climbs into an air shaft.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Following directions from Nell, he makes his way through a labyrinth of passageways, constantly barely avoiding detection by both people and cameras, to a garbage chute that goes straight up for dozens of floors. He spider climbs straight up an air duct, leaps from floor to floor in an elevator shaft and bends steel to get into a garbage chute. He watches the CEO through an air vent as he plants a remote connection device near his office.
End: (Mislead) Nell tells him, now the easy part. Just get to the contact’s lab to pick up a package.
4. INT. DR. KUTHRAPALI’S LAB – DAY
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) He meets Dr. K for the first time, expecting to receive just the stolen tech.
Middle: (Reveal/ Major twist) Dr. K informs Japheth that he (Dr. K) will be coming as well. They argue. There is blood on Dr. K’s sleeve. Dr. K says that if he doesn’t take him out, he will call security.
End: (Intrigue) Japheth has no choice. Takes Dr. K – a different way – to the server room. See a dead body behind a door as they leave.
5. INT. MEDINANO SERVER ROOM – DAY
Beginning: (External dilemma) Arrive in the server room with Dr. K, explain the problem. They only have three badges – only 3 can leave.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Japheth considers hiding out in the ducts and sneaking out at night, but his heat signature would be too obvious once the building is empty. Consider stuffing him in the trash, but he’s too big. Finally Nell comes up with a plan.
End: (Cliffhanger) Shut her bodily functions down so that she appears dead and sneak her out in the trash.
6. INT. MEDINANO SECURITY EXIT – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Steal a janitor’s uniform for Dr. K. Inject Nell with new nanotech, Japheth programs it. She falls asleep and they seal her in the bottom of the trash bin with the stolen nanotech.
Middle: (Uncertainty) They approach security, Japheth’s glasses monitoring Nell’s life signs as they slowly fall to zero. Push the bin into the scanner as they walk through the security line separately, badging out. Nell’s picture pops up as Dr. K walks through, just as the bin dings. Dr. K hurries through as Japheth stops to ask if there’s a problem with his bin.
End: (Cliffhanger) They scan again. It’s clear. He pushes the bin out, a silent alarm going off on his glasses that Nell has been “dead” too long.
7. EXT. UPPERS OUTSIDE MEDINANO – DAY
Beginning: (Uncertainty) They reconvene outside in the bushes and rush to pull Nell out of the bin.
Middle: (Suspense/ Major Twist) Japheth slowly revives her after a few tense moments. Dr. K just keeps telling them to hurry up. She’s fully revived, only—she can’t walk. She has spina bifida, and the new tech is interfering with the enhancements Japheth gave her that allow her to walk. Dr. K says just put her back in the bin and go.
End: (Surprise) Japheth throws Dr. K in the bin, threatening him to keep quiet or they’ll send the bin to the incinerator.
8. EXT. THE GATEWAY – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Arriving at the gateway, Japheth carrying Nell on his back, Olly pushing the bin.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Border guards think they’re playing some kind of game, but when he refuses to put her down to go through separately, they get tense. He has to tell them Nell hurt her ankle, they don’t qualify for the level of care to fix it, only to alleviate pain.
End: (Surprise) They wave them through, open the gates – we see the Dregs for the first time. It looks like a giant garbage dump compared to the Uppers.
9. EXT. THE DREGS – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Pull Dr. K out of the trash, he’s appalled at the conditions. They decide to split up, go different paths to make sure they weren’t followed.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Follow Japheth and Nell as they go through the streets and see a slice of life in the Dregs—poor hungry, desperate people. Japheth stops a guy from stealing from an old woman – with Nell still on his back. Then the guy’s friends come, chase them, but Japheth leaps across a chasm over a trash dump to get away.
End: (Reveal) Get to Japheth and the gang’s hangout/ home – a burnt out apartment building with a hidden entrance and booby traps.
10. INT. THE GANG’S HQ – DAY
Beginning: (Character changes radically) Meet Lila, Japheth the superhero/genius suddenly becomes a shy, bumbling idiot as he repairs Nell with Lila’s help.
Middle: (Mystery) Joking around with Nell as her enhancements come back online. As they’re testing her abilities, she starts to do anything they tell her, even as the commands get more and more ridiculous and embarrassing. Finally Japheth puts a stop to it. Something’s wrong.
End: (Reveal) Japheth examines the new tech – there’s mind control programming in there.
11. INT. DR. BENNETT’S CLINIC – DAY
Beginning: (Mystery) Dr. Bennett examines Nell while Japheth tells her about the mind-control programming.
Middle: (Surprise) She confirms his findings, but instead of being proud of him and telling him she’s going to help him do something about it, she tells him not to say one word about it to anyone. She tells him that’s exactly why Dr. K wanted to escape – because he was on the team that helped develop it, and then they sent someone to kill him. And that’s exactly what they’ll do to them if they find out they know. Japheth suggests using his new code for a viral cure (that he intended to help stop the constant epidemics in the Dregs) to shut down the programming.
End: (Character changes radically) She grows cold, tells Japheth she found too many problems with his code, it’s a dead end. They should all go home before curfew and be on high alert. There will be raids tonight after they realize what was stolen. There are some new teens hanging around with Dr. Bennett who Japheth doesn’t like, one of them looks like one of the guys he fought with earlier. Dr. Bennett just says that they’re working on a special project with them.
12. INT. THE GANG’S HQ – NIGHT
Beginning: (Suspense) At the gang’s hideout with Lila and Olly- tense night as they debate what to do, watch for someone to come for them.
Middle: (Mystery) They see a news vid about Dr. K saying he’s a terrorist and offering a huge reward if someone turns him in. Dr. Bennett doesn’t answer when they call her. Lila brings up the idea that one or both of them could be under Medinano’s control – they have no way of knowing.
End: (External Dilemma) If they break curfew, they could be arrested. If they don’t Dr. Bennett could be killed. They decide to risk it and return to Dr. B’s lab to warn her.
ACT 2:
13. INT. DR. BENNETT’S LAB – NIGHT
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Lila gives them all cool disguises. They break curfew and make their way to Dr. Bennett’s lab through the dangers of the night-time Dregs.
Middle: (Mystery) Find the lab in disarray, a dead Medinano operative on the table looking like he died from internal bleeding, no wounds.
End: (Major Twist) A heavily armed Medinano investigative unit descends – a battle ensues and they barely escape.
14. INT. HIDEOUT – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Fleeing Medinano’s forces, they hide in the slums.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) They begin to wonder if any of them could be under Medinano’s control, and Japheth goes through their code – Nell is the only one who has the new tech, and the mind control portion is still turned off. Suddenly they see themselves (Japheth, Nell and Olly) on news vids from Medinano security as well as altered video from Bennett’s lab – claiming they killed Bennett, showing a picture of what looks like her dead body—they know this will turn everyone in the Dregs against them.
End: (Cliffhanger) They decide they must find out what happened to Dr. Bennett. Lila must leave to check on her ailing parents – they’re sure no one is looking for her because she wasn’t in any of the videos.
15. EXT. TECH BAZAAR – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Afraid their personal devices could be tracked if they connect to the public network, they realize they will have to go out in public and use a public terminal to find any info on Dr. Bennett.
Middle: (Uncertainty) They go to the busiest, most crowded place they know in an attempt to blend in – the illegal tech bazaar. Japheth connects to the terminal and downloads as much information as he can before both Medinano agents and Dregs police descend. A high-octane chase through the bazaar-
End: (Surprise) Lila creates a brilliant diversion, sending swarms of holographic nanites into the crowd, creating numerous duplicates of them. She pulls them down into the sewers and they get away.
16. INT. SEWERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (More interesting setting) They decide that the sewers are the safest place for them to stay for the night.
Middle: (Intrigue/ Uncomfortable Moment) They sort through the data Japheth downloaded – security video and traffic cameras – looking for any trace of Bennett or Kuthrapali. Everyone is nervous, especially Lila. When they get a moment alone, Japheth and Lila almost kiss, but then she starts to maybe confess something when Olly interrupts, wondering if there’s any way for them to be infected with the new mind-control tech without them knowing. Japheth checks them all again, just to be safe, while his program sorts through the data.
End: (Cliffhanger) Ding. There’s a match. A partial view of Dr. Bennett’s face as she meets with a dangerous illegal tech supplier they know of – who Dr. Bennett told them NEVER to associate with.
17. MIDPOINT: INT. TECH DEALER’S LAIR – DAY
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) They show up at the tech dealer’s place and his goons think they’re there to rob the place – but they just want info on Bennett’s whereabouts.
Middle: (Suspense/Mislead) Swarmed by a new team of biohacked teens with similar capabilities (the kids hanging around Dr. B earlier), they are captured and taken to Dr. Bennett. There they learn her secret past – she was arrested for trying to help his parents (who had a terrible disease – Dr. Bennett delivered Nell by C-section before their mother passed away). Dr. B was stripped of her license and sent to the Dregs, left her wife and daughter behind in the Uppers, has a granddaughter she’s never even met. Dr. Bennett says she is giving up—she and Dr. K are trying to get to Canada where they think they might still be able to help people. She also reveals to everyone that Japheth applied to a Medinano school and would have left the Uppers a long time ago if not for Nell – subtly undermining the team’s cohesion. She suggests he try and apply again now that Nell is older – maybe he could get them out of the Dregs.
End: (Internal Dilemma) The team leaves Dr. Bennett’s, full of doubt and frustration, not knowing what to do.

ACT 3:
18. INT. OLD ICE SKATING RINK TURNED LIVING QUARTERS – NIGHT
Beginning: (more interesting location) The team finds its way into an old ice skating rink turned squatter’s camp, hiding out in the back of the old rental skate room. We see one of the squatters notice them with suspicion.
Middle: (Superior Position) Unaware of the danger they’re in, they settle in and wonder what the place used to be. Nell tells them that Dr. Bennett told her it used to be an ice skating rink – they’ve only seen those on TV. That’s something they do in the Uppers, watch people dance around or play some kind of game. They can’t imagine wasting all that water or energy. But people used to do that here too. People used to do things just for fun, and live in houses and have parks and pets and go to school and so on. But something went wrong. Something changed, and nobody did anything about it. They already know how evil Medinano is, how they destroy lives, and to sit back and do nothing while they literally take over the world… well, things may not be able to get any worse in the Dregs, but they certainly could get better.
End: (Surprise/Uncertainty) They hear – come out with your hands up. Someone has called the Dregs police on them! They battle their way out of the rink, killing an officer.
19. INT. ABANDONED SUBWAY – NIGHT
Beginning: (more interesting setting) They go to the most dangerous part of the Dregs, the old subway system, knowing the police won’t chase them there, but also knowing they could be attacked by the dangerous gang that lives there.
Middle: (Uncertainty/ Surprise) They are surrounded by members of the gang that chased Japheth and Nell earlier, who take them to their leader – who has a kid with spina bifida. Japheth helps the kid walk, now they are under the protection of the gang.
End: (External Dilemma) They decide to do something about the way things are and come up with a plan.
20. INT. MEDINANO EXEC ENTRANCE – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) They decide no one will expect them to try to get through the executive entrance. Lila will disguise them as various execs and they will enter that way.
Middle: (Surprise) Tense scene as they badge in, first Japheth, then Nell, then Olly – someone asks him a question, he freezes, Japheth answers for him, pulls him through. Then Lila badges in – she’s asked to step aside.
End: (External Dilemma) Japheth wants to go back for her, but that will end the mission. Nell pulls him on.
21. INT. MEDINANO UPPER FLOORS HALLWAY – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) They make it to the CEO’s office, but Nell’s attempts to hack the security fail, suddenly they are surrounded by security.
Middle: (Uncertainty, Betrayal) Pinned down in the hallway, they fight as best they can. Olly gets shot, but should survive because of his enhancements, but then he’s captured. The Medinano “medics” deactivate his enhancements and watch him die. They bring out Lila, say they’re going to kill her next. She tells them it won’t matter if they kill her, the only way to get Japheth to stop is to take Nell. The CEO thanks her for her help and gives her some Medinano tech for her ailing parents, sends her on her way.
End: (Uncertainty) Battle resumes, focused on capturing Nell, which they do quickly.
ACT 4:
22. INT. MEDINANO MEDICAL LAB – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Captured, Medinano’s team begins removing their enhancements, including Nell’s ability to walk.
Middle: (Reveal, Major Twist) The “doctors” begin having seizures, dying right in front of them – the dead bodies look like the Medinano operative at Dr. Bennett’s. Nell (now unable to walk) hacks their system and finds a perfect escape route, but Japheth (now without any enhancements) examines the bodies. He discovers his viral cure was turned into a deadly virus. This can only be the work of Dr. Bennett.
End: (External Dilemma) Will they escape or stay to help?
23. INT. MEDINANO CEO’S OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: (Mystery) They decide to stay. Using a dead guy’s hand, they break into the CEO’s office and find him desperately trying to figure out what’s going on – but suspiciously not having seizures himself.
Middle: (Uncertainty) He accuses them of being responsible for the attack, takes Nell by gunpoint. Out of nowhere, Lila saves them by injecting him with the new tech he had given her to give to her parents. He starts having a seizure.
End: (Major Twist) Japheth saves him with some brilliant hacking (of Japheth’s own code), and starts spreading that fix through the population. And because of Medinano’s mind-control software, they can control him.
24. INT. MEDINANO BOARDROOM – DAY
Beginning: (Mystery) Head to Medinano’s boardroom where they find a select few Medinano execs who also didn’t take the latest update cowering in a corner.
Middle: (Mislead/ Reveal) CEO sends them all home to check on their families. Japheth and Nell begin broadcasting a video of him explaining exactly what the latest update does and that a cure for the virus is on the way. The security guards and other Medinano folks who didn’t die start to recover. They arrest Japheth and Nell, realizing that the CEO is under their control. But then a security guard starts having a seizure – Japheth examines him and gives them some bad news. The virus is adapting to his code – it’s going to keep spreading and killing people. The only person who could actually stop it is Bennett.
End: (Cliffhanger) They have no idea where Bennett is. By the time they scour the Dregs looking for her, it will be too late.
25. INT/EXT. DR. BENNETT’S DAUGHTER’S HOME – DAY
Beginning: (Mystery) Nell suggests they look for Bennett at her daughter’s – she wouldn’t let her family die.
Middle: (Uncertainty) They send forces to arrest Bennett, get the cure from her – but she tells them that new nanotech must be injected into everyone in the Uppers individually, and so they’ll never replicate enough in time to save the majority.
End: (Cliffhanger) People start to get sick again. Our team starts to lose hope.

26. EXT. UPPERS MAIN SQUARE – DAY
Beginning: (Suspense) Heading out to the main square in the Uppers where people have started to gather. People are starting to get sick again.
Middle: (Major Twist) Nell suddenly asks why she hasn’t gotten sick – even though she has the new tech. They realize everyone Dr. Bennett treated has the cure. That means nearly everyone in the Dregs is protected – and that the cure is widely available.
End: (Uncertainty) They throw open the gates and call on all the people in the Dregs to come donate blood to save the people in the Uppers. They don’t know if anyone will respond because of the way they’ve been treated, but then- Japheth and Nell watch with tears as people start coming in to help.

27. INT. MEDINANO HOLDING CELL – DAY
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Dr. Bennett sees the news vids, people coming from the Dregs to donate blood.
Middle: (Intrigue) She tells her guards she wants to make a statement. She says that the people who took her life away, the people who decided that only people with money should live and everyone else’s life was expendable, they deserve to die. And she won’t live in a world where they don’t get what they deserve.
End: (Major Twist) She activates a secret code (maybe with something she says?) – and drops dead.
28. INT. SIBLINGS’ NEW HOME/ PENTAGON – DAY
Beginning: (Character changes radically) Japheth (in a suit!) now seeming like a responsible, upright citizen on a “zoom” call – remotely helping US leaders coordinate with governments around the world to disable Medinano’s mind-control programming.
Middle: (Mystery) We hear construction sounds going on while he’s talking to people in the Pentagon and around the world. When the call ends, we see construction outside. The Dregs are being rebuilt, including the ice skating rink. He walks to the new home that’s being finished for him, Lila, Nell, and Lila’s parents, who are receiving the health care they need.
End: (Surprise) Vid of trial of Medinano CEO, claiming that socialized medicine will be the downfall of the United States of America and they’ll all be sorry. Japheth just turns away, as he, Nell and Lila continue walking their dog.

[David Zelitzky]

David Z’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!
Vision:
I am an interesting, dependable, successful writer that people love to work with.
What I learned from doing this assignment is to remember these prompts as I finish the script!

ACT THREE:
Scene 19. INT – LADIES BATHROOM – NIGHT
(INTERESTING SETTING) Mick takes Tessa inside. He knows what Chris has taken. (Superior Position) He convinces her that the drugs are causing him hallucinations, maybe he can take it and see what he finds, knowing that she won’t let him. Tessa needs it. She can find him if she does the same thing. (Suspense) Mick says he’ll monitor them while she’s under.
Scene 20. INT – DINER – NIGHT
(SUSPENSE) Mick prepares the needle. Tessa takes Chris’s locket from around his neck so she can find her way back. She gives him her right arm. What’s happening? Foams at the mouth. They grab her and lay her down as she seizes uncontrollably. (CLIFFHANGER) She lies lifeless next to Chris. They use washcloths, hold her hand.
Scene 21. INT TESSA’S HOUSE – NIGHT
(UNCERTAINTY) She enters the house. Different. Shadows. Calling for Chris. Shadows fly past. She hears him crying. She finds him on the floor. (CHARACTER CHANGES RADICALLY) He yells at her. She’s ruined his life. Controlling. Because she has no life of her own. Says the worst possible thing. She grabs him. He throws her off and runs away. She cries.
Scene 22. INT TESSA’S BATHROOM – NIGHT
(UNCOMFORTABLE MOMENT) Tessa runs in. Tries to wash her face. Hard to recognize. HALLUCINATING – SHE SEES her reflection. (SURPRISE) Skeletal. All her worst fears. Pulls a nail out. Hair is falling out. Monsters are banging down the door.
Rethink everything: She calls. Zombies come. NO ONE LETS HER GET TO CHRIS AS HE CRIES FOR HELP. WHEN SHE FINDS HIM HE DOESN’T WANT TO LEAVE. HE INSULTS HER. SAYS UNSPEAKABLE THINGS. IT’S NOT HIM BUT SHE HAS TO WONDER. DOES HE REALLY THINK ALL THIS? She has to fight them off. she is being battered and bloodied on the floor of the diner. They throw water on her. Wake her up. She’s furious TO COME BACK. THE OWNER OF THE DINER THREATENS. SHE FIGHTS HIM OFF. THROWS BOILING OIL FROM THE FRYER. HE SLIPS AND SKEWERS HIMSELF. DEAD. SHE HAS TO FIND CHRIS. AT ANY COST.
Scene 23. New plan… do it again and don’t fall for the hallucinations
Scene 24. Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – She can’t drag Chris back. They’re stuck. It’s been too long.

ACT FOUR:
Scene 25.
Scene 26. Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Fights with all the drugged, trapped people who don’t want anyone to leave. THE ONE IN CHARGE OF THE TRAPPED TORTURES HER. CHRIS SITS BY HIS SIDE. SHE HAS TO DECIDE TO DIE TO SAVE HIM.

[Harry Rankin]

Harry’s Fascinating Scene Outlines

My vision for success from this program is:
To create scripts freely when working with producers, directors and cast, and sell award-winning work to create a lifestyle confident of financial freedom.

What I learned from doing this assignment is: Fleshing the skeleton…

ACT ONE
Scene 1
Slugline: INT. WATERFALL – AFTERNOON
Description: Introduce Suli and Jon in a hilariously awkward training scenario, where they're both struggling with zero-gravity manoeuvres, but sparks fly between them nonetheless.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Intrigue): Suli and Jon are introduced in a zero-gravity training exercise, fumbling and bumping into each other.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Suli and Jon compete against each other in the exercise, highlighting the physical challenge and gender dynamics.
Ending: (Bonding): Despite coming last in the exercise, Suli and Jon share a laugh and start forming a connection.

Scene 2
Slugline: INT. TV CONTROL – DAY
Description: Discover reality TV show to win competition.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Superior Position): The audience learns about the reality TV aspect of the competition before the characters do.
Middle: (Conflict): The team faces a challenge to secure funding for the space station, adding pressure to their mission.
Ending: (Uncertainty): The protagonists win the competition, but the threat of global unrest looms over the upcoming space launch.

Scene 3
Slugline: INT. BUS – DAY
Description: Winners travel to training facility.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Anticipation): Suli and Jon, along with other winners, are excited as they travel to the training facility.
Middle: (Suspense): The journey is filled with hints about the facility's high security and past financial mismanagement.
Ending: (Mystery): They arrive at the locked compound, raising questions about the facility’s true purpose and security measures.

Scene 4
Slugline: EXT. COMPOUND – DAY
Description: Intro to training.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (More Interesting Setting): The training compound is revealed to be high-tech and fully monitored, adding to the pressure.
Middle: (Conflict): Suli and Jon struggle with the intense training exercises and lack of privacy.
Ending: (Hope): Despite the difficulties, they begin to see the importance of their mission and hope for its success.

Scene 5
Slugline: INT. NEWSROOM – DAY
Description: Intern saves her job and gets commission to interview protagonist.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Intrigue): The intern fights to keep her job by pitching an exclusive interview with the astronauts.
Middle: (Conflict): She faces resistance and must prove the value of her idea to skeptical superiors.
Ending: (Success): She secures the commission, linking the newsroom to the space mission and setting up future interactions.

Scene 6
Slugline: INT. POOL – DAY
Description: Training – but someone dies.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Suspense): The team undergoes extreme training exercises in the pool.
Middle: (Shock): A tragic accident occurs, resulting in the death of a trainee, highlighting the mission’s dangers.
Ending: (Moral Issue): Politicians decide to televise the training, despite the tragedy, to maintain public interest and funding.

Scene 7
Slugline: INT. BAR – NIGHT
Description: Meet-up. Protagonists kiss. Instant news.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Romance): Suli and Jon share a moment of connection and kiss in a bar, breaking the professional barrier.
Middle: (Conflict): Their kiss is caught by a journalist, violating their NDA and celibate clause.
Ending: (Suspense): They worry about the repercussions of their actions on the mission.

Scene 8
Slugline: EXT. ROCKY TERRAIN – DAY
Description: Training.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Engagement): Suli and Jon grow closer as they tackle a challenging training exercise in the rocky terrain.
Middle: (Conflict): They face political scrutiny and the question of whether their relationship can survive the mission.
Ending: (Hope): They reaffirm their commitment to each other and the mission.

Scene 9
Slugline: INT. BRIEFING ROOM – DAY
Description: Intro to technical ‘Bubble’.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Intrigue): The team is introduced to the “Bubble,” a key technical component of their mission.
Middle: (Conflict): Understanding and mastering the complex technology proves challenging.
Ending: (Hope): They successfully integrate the technology into their training, feeling more prepared for the mission.

Scene 10
Slugline: INT. DENNIS OFFICE – DAY
Description: Dad tells Jon his engagement is off.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Conflict): Jon faces personal conflict as his father tells him to break off his engagement.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma): Jon grapples with his duty to his family versus his love for Suli.
Ending: (Relief): Jon decides to stay committed to Suli, feeling a sense of relief and resolve.

Scene 11
Slugline: INT. CANTEEN – DAY
Description: Jon flirts to re-claim Suli.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Romance): Jon makes a playful and determined effort to win back Suli’s trust in the canteen.
Middle: (Conflict): Suli is hesitant, reflecting on their past and the challenges ahead.
Ending: (Hope): Suli begins to soften, showing signs of forgiveness and rekindled affection.

Scene 12
Slugline: INT. DORMITORY – NIGHT
Description: Suli worried. Journalist says get on with relationship.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Conflict): Suli is anxious about her relationship and the mission.
Middle: (Reassurance): The journalist encourages her to pursue her happiness, providing an outside perspective.
Ending: (Hope): Suli feels reassured and more confident about continuing her relationship with Jon.

Scene 13
Slugline: INT. LOW ORBIT FLIGHT – DAY
Description: Training flight to sex.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Intrigue): Suli and Jon are on a training flight, exploring zero-gravity.
Middle: (Conflict): They break the rules by disabling cameras to have an intimate moment in zero gravity.
Ending: (Hope): They successfully share a private, romantic moment, strengthening their bond despite the risks.

ACT TWO
Scene 14
Slugline: EXT. CANYON – DAY
Description: Warring tribes meet. Two different family backgrounds for barbecue in Bryce Canyon.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Cultural Clash): Suli and Jon’s families meet, showcasing their different backgrounds and creating tension.
Middle: (Conflict): Cultural differences lead to misunderstandings and heated discussions.
Ending: (Tentative Understanding): Despite the clashes, the families begin to find common ground, fostering hope for support.

Scene 15
Slugline: INT. PLANE – DAY
Description: Technical check on weightless plane. Technician finds condom.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Discovery): A technician finds a condom during a routine check, raising eyebrows.
Middle: (Moral Decision): The technician grapples with whether to report the find, considering the implications.
Ending: (Man to Man): He decides not to report it, choosing to handle it discreetly to avoid causing trouble for Suli and Jon.

Scene 16
Slugline: INT. MEDICAL FACILITY – DAY
Description: Final medical exam but leaves before result.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Suspense): Suli undergoes a final medical exam, leaving before the results are revealed.
Middle: (Conflict): The nurse discovers something unusual in the test results but chooses to keep it quiet.
Ending: (Sympathy): The nurse’s sympathetic demeanor hints at deeper concerns, adding tension to the upcoming mission.

Scene 17
Slugline: INT. DENNIS OFFICE – DAY
Description: Nurse tells controller and politician, but they say go ahead, but keep quiet.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Disclosure): The nurse reluctantly informs the controller and a politician about the potential issue.
Middle: (Conflict): They decide to proceed with the mission and keep the information confidential, despite the risks.
Ending: (Conspiracy): The nurse feels guilty and conflicted, knowing she’s letting Suli down by not being fully transparent.

Scene 18
Slugline: EXT. BUBBLE – DAY
Description: Successful docking and entry.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Success): The mission reaches a critical milestone with a successful docking.
Middle: (Technical Challenge): The team works through minor technical issues, showcasing their skills and teamwork.
Ending: (Relief): They successfully enter the Bubble, feeling a sense of relief and accomplishment.

Scene 19
Slugline: INT. GALLEY – DAY
Description: Fun with gravity switch – food fight.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Tension Release): The team plays with the gravity switch, leading to a spontaneous food fight.
Middle: (Conflict): Managing zero-gravity food chaos proves challenging but fun, bonding the team.
Ending: (Bonding): The playful moment strengthens their camaraderie and lightens the mood.

Scene 20
Slugline: INT. GREENHOUSE POD – DAY
Description: Suli tends plants, gets morning sickness.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Routine): Suli tends to the plants in the greenhouse pod, establishing a sense of normalcy.
Middle: (Revelation): She experiences morning sickness, revealing her pregnancy symptoms.
Ending: (Conflict): She struggles to hide the symptoms from the rest of the team, adding to her personal challenges.

Scene 21
Slugline: INT. GALLEY – DAY
Description: Discuss food standards. Payload itinerary.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Planning): The team discusses food standards and the payload itinerary.
Middle: (Conflict): Managing limited resources and planning for long-term survival creates tension.
Ending: (Concern): They express concerns about having enough supplies, highlighting the mission’s logistical challenges.

Scene 22
Slugline: INT. NEWSROOM – DAY
Description: Global conflict/warming issue.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Informative): Newsroom coverage reveals the escalating global conflict and climate issues.
Middle: (Alarming): The severity of the situation becomes clear, increasing the stakes of the mission.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): The team and audience hope the mission can provide a distraction or solution but fear the impact of worsening global issues.

Scene 23
Slugline: INT. FLEUR’S OFFICE – DAY
Description: Machinations regarding profiteering from war.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Strategy): Harrison discusses plans to profit from the ongoing conflict.
Middle: (Ethical Dilemma): The conversation reveals the moral corruption and greed behind the plans.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s fear that profiteers will succeed, adding a layer of tension to the mission’s importance.

Scene 24
Slugline: INT. FLIGHTDECK – DAY
Description: Drone crashes killing all team except Jon & Suli.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Disaster): The drone crashes, causing immediate chaos and fear.
Middle**: (Survival): Jon and Suli scramble to ensure their survival amidst the wreckage.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They manage to survive, but the fear of being isolated and the mission’s fragility looms over them.

ACT THREE
Scene 25
Slugline: INT. CONTROL ROOM – DAY
Description: Crash breaks news across the world.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Tragedy): News of the crash spreads, causing global shock and concern.
Middle: (Media Frenzy): The control room deals with a barrage of media inquiries and public scrutiny.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): The world hopes for a swift rescue but fears the worst for the astronauts.

Scene 26
Slugline: EXT. TRAILER PARK – DAY
Description: Kate interviews Zoe’s Mum. “I used to live just over there.”
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Personal Connection): Kate interviews Zoe’s Mum, revealing a personal link to the broader narrative.
Middle: (Emotional Revelation): The interview uncovers past hardships and emotional struggles.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that the interview will shed light on the situation, adding depth to the story.

Scene 27
Slugline: INT. DENNIS OFFICE – DAY
Description: Organize rescue mission.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Planning): The team in Dennis’s office organizes the logistics of the rescue mission.
Middle: (Conflict): Logistical and political hurdles threaten to delay the mission.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that the rescue mission will succeed despite the challenges.

Scene 28
Slugline: INT. CONTROL ROOM – DAY
Description: Nurse tells Suli she is pregnant. Jon doesn’t hear, but the world does.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Revelation): The nurse reveals to Suli that she is pregnant.
Middle: (Conflict): The revelation is broadcast to the world, causing public and personal turmoil.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): Suli hopes to handle the pressure, while fearing the public reaction and privacy invasion.

Scene 29
Slugline: INT. SLEEP POD – NIGHT
Description: Suli tells Jon. Last to know – huff.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Communication Breakdown): Suli tells Jon about her pregnancy, feeling upset that he’s the last to know.
Middle: (Emotional Hurt): They discuss the impact of the news and their feelings of betrayal and concern.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They begin to understand each other, hoping to reconcile and face the challenges together.

Scene 30
Slugline: INT. DENNIS OFFICE – DAY
Description: Fleet grounded for safety checks.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Setback): The rescue fleet is grounded for safety checks, causing a major delay.
Middle: (Conflict): The team faces bureaucratic delays and logistical challenges.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that the fleet will resume quickly, but fear of prolonged isolation.

Scene 31
Slugline: INT. MEDICAL FACILITY – DAY
Description: Cover-up of pregnancy exposed.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Secret Revealed): The cover-up of Suli’s pregnancy is exposed.
Middle: (Conflict): The ethical breach causes tension and trust issues among the team.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope for accountability, but fear of further consequences.

Scene 32
Slugline: EXT. TRAILER PARK – DAY
Description: Mum demonstration with Suli 8mm films.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Nostalgia): Zoe’s Mum demonstrates old 8mm films of Suli, creating a sense of nostalgia.
Middle: (Emotional Expression): The films evoke strong emotions and memories.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that the demonstration will garner public support and understanding.

Scene 33
Slugline: INT. DENNIS OFFICE – DAY
Description: Backup team prepared for rescue mission.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Preparation): The backup team is prepared for the rescue mission.
Middle: (Conflict): Coordination and logistical challenges arise.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that the backup mission will succeed, but fear of unforeseen obstacles.

Scene 34
Slugline: EXT. SENATE BUILDING – DAY
Description: Blackmail attempt to sabotage mission.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Threat): A blackmail attempt is made to sabotage the rescue mission.
Middle: (Ethical Dilemma): The team faces an ethical dilemma and power struggle.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that the blackmail will fail, but fear of its impact on the mission.

Scene 35
Slugline: INT. BUBBLE – DAY
Description: Journalist anchor as shuttle approaches. Wave at window.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Hope): The journalist anchors as the shuttle approaches, building anticipation.
Middle: (Conflict): The mission faces technical challenges, causing tension.
Ending: (Disappointment): Access is denied, leading to disappointment and isolation.

ACT FOUR
Scene 36
Slugline: INT. DENNIS OFFICE – DAY
Description: Controller now blackmails politician with recording.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Leverage): The controller uses a recording to blackmail the politician.
Middle: (Ethical Compromise): The politician faces an ethical compromise and must decide how to proceed.
Ending: (Action): The blackmail leads to decisive action to fund a real rescue mission.

Scene 37
Slugline: INT. BUBBLE – DAY
Description: Suli and Jon play I-spy.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Boredom): Suli and Jon play I-spy to pass the time, showing their boredom.
Middle: (Bonding): The game turns into a bonding moment, deepening their relationship.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They stay connected, hoping to maintain their relationship despite the challenges.

Scene 38
Slugline: INT. SLEEP POD – NIGHT
Description: Gravity hi-jinks in shower. Love. Journalist covers!
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Fun): Suli and Jon engage in gravity hi-jinks in the shower, showing their playful side.
Middle: (Intimacy): Their playful moment turns into an intimate one, highlighting their love.
Ending: (Privacy vs Public): The journalist covers their moment, creating tension between their need for privacy and public scrutiny.

Scene 39
Slugline: INT. NEWSROOM – DAY
Description: Global support.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Concern): The newsroom shows global concern for the astronauts’ situation.
Middle: (Solidarity): Differing opinions are expressed, but a sense of global unity emerges.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope that support remains strong, but fear of waning interest.

Scene 40
Slugline: INT. SLEEP POD – NIGHT
Description: Nesting. Curtains – nobody can see.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Preparation): Suli and Jon prepare their sleep pod, creating a safe space.
Middle: (Security): They hang curtains to ensure privacy, emphasizing their need for security.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They feel safe, hoping this privacy lasts, but fearing further intrusion.

Scene 41
Slugline: INT. FLIGHTDECK – DAY
Description: Labor pains.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Calm): Suli experiences the first signs of labor, initially calm.
Middle: (Crisis): Labor pains escalate, turning the situation into a crisis.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope for a smooth delivery, but fear of complications.

Scene 42
Slugline: INT. MEDICAL FACILITY – DAY
Description: Nurse and journalist talk.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Information): The nurse and journalist share critical information about the situation.
Middle: (Trust Issues): They grapple with trust issues, deciding how to handle the news.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They develop a strategy, hoping it works, but fearing it might fail.

Scene 43
Slugline: INT. GALLEY – DAY
Description: Jon boils water.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Preparation): Jon prepares for the birth by boiling water.
Middle: (Resource Management): He manages the limited resources, showing his involvement.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): He feels ready, hoping to be useful, but fearing potential issues.

Scene 44
Slugline: INT. NEWSROOM – DAY
Description: World experts offer conflicting advice.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Chaos): The newsroom is filled with conflicting advice from world experts.
Middle: (Cooperation): They work to find a unified approach, despite differing opinions.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope for the right decisions, but fear of ongoing chaos.

Scene 45
Slugline: INT. SLEEP POD – NIGHT
Description: Swearing practice in different languages. Journalist covers.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Tension): Suli and Jon practice swearing in different languages to relieve tension.
Middle: (Humor): The exercise turns humorous, lightening the mood.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They feel more relaxed, hoping humor eases the stress, but fearing it’s not enough.

Scene 46
Slugline: EXT. LAUNCH PAD – DAY
Description: Final rescue launch.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Launch): The final rescue launch takes off, building anticipation.
Middle: (Technical Issues): The mission faces technical issues, causing concern.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): There’s hope the rescue will succeed, but fear of failure.

Scene 47
Slugline: INT. BUBBLE HOSPITAL BAY – DAY
Description: They don’t like the look of the birthing bed/stirrups etc. Loads too much advice from ‘experts’ on Earth. Try turning off gravity to help. It doesn’t.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Discomfort): Suli and Jon are uncomfortable with the birthing bed and stirrups.
Middle: (Desperation): They try turning off gravity to help, following too much advice from experts.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): The attempt fails, increasing their desperation and fear of complications.

Scene 48
Slugline: INT. SLEEP POD – DAY
Description: Birth intercut newsroom, TV.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Labor): Suli goes into labor, with the scene intercut with newsroom coverage.
Middle: (Struggle): They face physical and emotional struggles during the birth.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): The birth is successful, providing a climactic moment of hope.

Scene 49
Slugline: EXT. BUBBLE – DAY
Description: Shuttle gains access. General chaos.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Contact): The shuttle gains access to the Bubble, creating chaos.
Middle: (Technical Challenges): They face technical challenges as they attempt to dock.
Ending: (Relief): They successfully make contact, feeling a sense of relief.

Scene 50
Slugline: INT. BUBBLE – DAY
Description: Shuttle heads home.
Key Moments:
Beginning: (Crisis to Resolution): The crisis ends as the shuttle prepares to head home.
Middle: (Recovery): The team undergoes emotional and physical recovery.
Ending: (Hope/Fear): They return safely, providing a hopeful and satisfying resolution.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Harry Rankin.

[jim ramsay]

RAMSAY – Module 4 – Lesson 10: Making Every Scene Fascinating

Act 1: Introduction
Scene 1: Dream Flashback
Slug Line: INT. MIC’S BEDROOM – NIGHT Description: Mic (Michaela) and her younger sister are caught in gang initiation crossfire. Her sister is killed and dies in Mic’s arms.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Flashback): Mic is asleep, dreaming of a peaceful day in Los Angeles.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Shock): The scene turns chaotic as gang members open fire, and Mic’s sister is shot.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Emotional Impact): Mic’s sister dies in her arms, and Mic wakes up in terror.
Scene 2: Character Establishment
Slug Line: INT. FEDERAL AGENCY GYM – DAY Description: Mic, a tough and caustic Federal Agent, trains intensely in Krav Maga, showing her determination and skill.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Action): Mic trains aggressively, displaying her physical prowess and determination.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Flashback): Brief flashbacks show her journey and rise through the ranks.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Revelation): Mic ends her training session, revealing her obsession with finding Carlito.
Scene 3: Catalyst Incident
Slug Line: INT. CARTEL SAFE HOUSE – NIGHT Description: Mic infiltrates the Mexican Cartel, but the mission is compromised when she kills the terrorists trying to rape and kill her.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Tension): Mic delivers Cartel assets to the safe house.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Conflict): Mic is attacked by the terrorist assets, and in self-defense, she kills the terrorists.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Consequence): The mission is blown, Mic has been shot several times, and she must escape before the cartel discovers her actions.
Scene 4: Fallout
Slug Line: INT. FEDERAL AGENCY OFFICE – DAY Description: Mic’s frequent violent recklessness has alienated her fellow agents and department bosses. She is given an ultimatum.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Confrontation): Mic’s boss, TJ Thyne, reprimands her for her actions. He tells her the suits want her gone, but he convinces them to give her a second chance.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Ultimatum): TJ gives her a choice: transfer to the Human Trafficking Division or be fired.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Decision): Mic, angry and frustrated, decides to quit.
Act 2: Transformation
Scene 5: New Assignment
Slug Line: INT. MIC’S APARTMENT – NIGHT Description: Mic’s relationship with her neighbor’s teenage daughter, Hannah, becomes her only solace. When Hannah is abducted after Mic’s bad advice, she is guilt-ridden and accepts the transfer to the Human Trafficking Division.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Character Development): Mic interacts with Hannah, showing her softer side.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Turning Point): Hannah is abducted, and Mic, believing she is partially responsible, is overwhelmed with guilt.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Resolve): Mic accepts the transfer to the Trafficking Division to use their resources to find Hannah.
Scene 6: Trafficking Division
Slug Line: INT. TRAFFICKING DIVISION OFFICE – DAY Description: Mic meets her new boss, Chief Kirchner, who allows her a second chance but prohibits using violence.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Introduction): Mic is introduced to Chief Kirchner, who is wary of her. Mic corrals her acerbic attitude because it’s to help Hannah.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Restriction): Kirchner lays down strict rules, prohibiting Mic from using violence, or she will be fired. No exceptions.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Challenge): Mic has been given her first assignment. She is to track down a godly vigilante who is saving sex-trafficked girls.
Scene 7: The Vigilante
Slug Line: EXT. CHRISTIAN BAND VENUE – NIGHT Description: Mic’s investigation leads her to a Christian Band. She believes the band leader, David, is the vigilante she’s tracking.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Discovery): Mic attends the band’s performance, observing David.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Revelation): Mic realizes David is the vigilante she has been looking for. She has no proof but is sure he is the vigilante.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Alliance): David is charismatic and convinces Mic to join him in his quest. She agrees to help him, but only if he prioritizes finding Hannah.
Scene 8: Planning and Rescue
Slug Line: INT. CARTEL SAFEHOUSE—NIGHT Description: A lead takes Mic and David to an estate in Beverly Hills owned by the Cartel. They discover Hannah and other girls being held.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Suspense): Mic and David follow a lead to the cartel safe house.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Discovery): They confirm that Hannah and the other girls are inside. Mic’s mission is complicated when she learns about a pending fentanyl deal.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Conflict): Mic and David clash over how to approach the Mansion, with Mic wanting to storm in and David advocating for a more strategic plan.
Act 3: The Plan in Motion
Scene 9: Tactical Planning
Slug Line: INT. CARTEL SAFEHOUSE – NIGHT Description: David agrees to help Mic save Hannah and extract the girls, but he doesn’t want her to use violence.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Compromise): David agrees to help but insists on a nonviolent approach. Mic knows his idea is unreasonable, but she will do what it takes.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Strategy): They devise a plan to infiltrate the Mansion.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Preparation): Mic contacts TJ for backup, but he orders her to stand down and promises his agents will take charge in the morning. But the morning will be too late. Hannah will be gone, and the fentanyl deal will be completed.

Scene 10: The Final Showdown
Slug Line: INT. CARTEL MANSION – NIGHT Description: Mic can’t wait on the Agency, so she goes ahead with the rescue on her own, fighting her way to Hannah and confronting Carlito.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Defiance): Mic proceeds with the rescue despite orders to stand down.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Action): She fights a furious and unrelenting battle with the cartel soldiers and miraculously escapes several deadly situations.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Confrontation): Mic confronts Carlito, revealing her history with him and her true intentions.
Act 4: Resolution
Scene 11: The Choice
Slug Line: INT. CARTEL MANSION – NIGHT Description: Mic must choose between killing Carlito, saving Hannah, or stopping the fentanyl deal.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Dilemma): Mic faces down Carlito and has the opportunity to kill him.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Moral Conflict): Influenced by David’s guidance, Mic struggles with her desire for vengeance and saving Hannah.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Decision): Mic decides to save Hannah and stop the fentanyl deal, foregoing her vendetta against Carlito.
Scene 12: Climax
Slug Line: INT. CARTEL MANSION—NIGHT Description: Mic confronts Carlito in a fierce battle. Although she doesn’t want to kill him, he gives her no choice, and she kills him and rescues Hannah. She even manages to stop the fentanyl deal that would have killed thousands.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Showdown): Mic engages in a fierce battle with Carlito.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Revelation): She reveals her past and true intentions during the fight.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Victory): Mic kills Carlito, rescues Hannah, and stops the fentanyl distribution.
Scene 13: Aftermath
Slug Line: EXT. CARTEL MANSION – DAWN Description: Mic is severely wounded but successful. She and David rescue Hannah and the girls, but the Chi-Com General escapes.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Aftermath): Mic, wounded, is surrounded by the battle’s aftermath.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Resolution): Mic and David rescue Hannah and the girls.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Escape): The Chi-Com General with the fentanyl escapes, and TJ’s agents arrive too late. Mic has already taken out the cartel and saved the day.
Scene 14: Final Moments
Slug Line: EXT. CARTEL MANSION – DAWN Description: Mic reflects on her journey, finding peace and redemption as she faces the consequences of her actions.
• Beginning (Interest Technique: Reflection): Mic, bloody and exhausted, reflects on her journey.
• Middle (Interest Technique: Emotional Closure): She finds peace and redemption, has saved the innocent, and has confronted her past and done the righteous thing.
• Ending (Interest Technique: Ambiguity): David stays with Mic, offering comfort and spiritual solace as she faces the consequences of her unsanctioned actions, leaving the ending ambiguous. Will Mic be back to fight another day? In a sequel?

[Terrie Shaft]

Terrie’s Fascinating Scene Outline
Vision: I am paid to write screenplays that become successful movies. My process is so solid I can enjoy my equestrian hobby while exceeding expectations with my writing.
Concept: An alien crashes into an off-the-grid hippie's house and they accidentally swap bodies.
What I learned from this assignment is that AI can be helpful. I had trouble because my first pass the prompt was too large and it failed. Second time, it only created output for half of my outline. I was able to put in the second half and get good results. I could have save a great deal of time and just used the AI for this step as the AI results were very consistent with mine and filled in all my blanks in a useful manner.
1. INT. SPACESHIP – IT’S OUTER SPACE THERE’S NO DAY OR NIGHT
Bill, an alien, flying in his spaceship comes out hibernation. He breaks the spaceship toilet which causes a series of malfunctions.
Scene Arc: Starts with Bill coming out of hibernation and ends with a series of malfunctions on the spaceship.
Essence: An alien is coming to Earth. Introduce Bill and his incompetence with technology.
Conflict: Bill is having trouble flying the spaceship.
Subtext: Bill is not very competent at flying his spaceship
Hope/Fear: Hope that Bill gets his ship and intestines back under control. Fear he will crash and/or defecate?

Beginning: (Intrigue): Bill wakes up from hibernation in a sleek, futuristic spaceship and clumsily starts his routine.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Bill accidentally breaks the spaceship toilet, leading to a series of escalating malfunctions, all while panicking and trying to fix things.
Ending: (Major Twist): The spaceship begins to spiral out of control as Bill desperately tries to regain stability.

2. EXT. FARMER’S MARKET – DAY
Misa gets into a heated argument with a customer at the farmer’s market because the customer wanted a BAG! The argument escalates involving most of the Farmer’s Market. Deeper layer: do they think some alien is going to come and save the planet, those are movies! Deputy Rhoades gets everyone at the farmer’s market to calm down, gets everyone to not charge Misa. Deputy Rhoades, after reprimanding Misa, convinces her to go home, maybe drink some herbal tea.
Scene Arc: Starts with Misa arguing and ends with her going home.
Essence: Show Misa's confrontational nature and her extreme environmentalism.
Conflict: Misa v. the entire Farmer’s Market community
Subtext: Misa is angry.
Hope/fear: Hope that Misa calms down. Fear it will escalate to physical violence.

Beginning: (Suspense): Misa aggressively argues with a customer over using a plastic bag, attracting attention.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): The argument escalates to involve several other market-goers, causing a chaotic scene.
Ending: (Superior Position): Deputy Rhoades calms the crowd and subtly hints at knowing Misa's troubled past, convincing her to go home and cool off.

3. INT. MISA’S OFF THE GRID HOME – DAY
Misa tends her plants, feeds her cat, and smokes weed. Misa’s off the grid home doesn’t look like much on the outside but is well-appointed with the highest quality, environmentally friendly everything.
Scene Arc: Starts with Misa alone and ends with her still alone.
Essence: Highlight Misa's solitary and eco-friendly lifestyle.
Conflict:
Subtext: Misa is affluent.
Hope/fear: Hope she’ll be left alone. Fear someone will interrupt her.

Beginning: (More Interesting Setting): Misa’s peaceful, eco-friendly home is revealed as she meticulously tends to her plants.
Middle: (Intrigue): Misa’s solitary rituals, like feeding her cat and smoking weed, showcase her commitment to her off-the-grid lifestyle.
Ending: (Suspense): Misa notices something unusual in the distance but dismisses it, returning to her solitude.

4. EXT. ROADWAY – DAY
Deputy Rhoades parked beside a road in his cruiser
5. INT. RHOADES’S POLICE CRUISER – DAY
Deputy Rhoades listens to meditation on his personal phone, deep breathing positive self-talk.

Scene Arc: Starts with Rhoades anxious and ends with him somewhat calm.
Essence: Deputy Rhoades’ coping mechanisms.
Conflict: Internal struggle with anxiety.
Subtext: Deputy Rhoades trying to manage anxiety.
Hope/fear: Hope he can relieve his anxiety. Fear he cannot.

Beginning: (Suspense): Deputy Rhoades sits anxiously in his cruiser, keeping an eye on the empty road.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma): He listens to meditation on his phone, battling his anxiety and trying to calm himself.
Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment): A sudden noise or movement outside the cruiser brings him back to high alert.

6. EXT. MISA’S OFF THE GRID HOME
Misa’s fancy energy efficient car parked by the house
Scene Arc: Establishes Misa’s home environment.
Essence: Show Misa's commitment to environmentalism.
Conflict: None.
Subtext: Misa values sustainability.
Hope/Fear: None.

Beginning: (More Interesting Setting): The scene opens with the sight of Misa’s energy-efficient car parked beside her off-the-grid home, highlighting her commitment to sustainability.
Middle: (Intrigue): Misa is seen maintaining her home’s solar power system emphasizing her dedication to an environmentally friendly lifestyle.
Ending: (Suspense): Misa glances out a window, sensing something amiss.

7. INT. MISA’S OUTHOUSE
Misa smoking a joint and looking out the outhouse window.
Scene Arc: Misa chilling.
Essence: Highlight Misa's desire for solitude.
Conflict: None
Subtext: Misa just wants to be alone.
Hope/fear: Hope she’ll be left alone. Fear someone will interrupt her.

Beginning: (More Interesting Setting): Misa relaxes in her uniquely designed, eco-friendly outhouse, enjoying a moment of solitude.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): She hears strange noises outside, glances out the window with mild concern.
Ending: (Suspense): Dismissing it as her imagination, she resumes her relaxation, unaware of the impending disturbance.

8. EXT. MISA’S HOME – NIGHT
Bill’s spaceship cruises towards Misa’s property, crashes into Misa’s outhouse. Misa stumbles out. Bill exits his spaceship and really needs a bathroom. Misa stumbles out of the outhouse. She notices Bill. He runs behind a bush. She grabs her blow torch and heads to the spaceship. Bill, terrified, runs away. Misa calls him a hallucination. Bill is terrified because of Misa’s nonchalant attitude.
Scene Arc: Starts with Bill’s spaceship cruising and ends with Bill terrified.
Essence: Bill crashes into Misa’s outhouse. Bill and Misa’s first interaction.
Conflict: Her outhouse is trashed, Bill’s spaceship is broken.
Subtext: Misa doesn’t believe Bill is there.
Hope/fear: Hope Bill crashes somewhere safe. Fear Bill crashes into Misa’s property.

Beginning: (Suspense): Bill’s spaceship approaches Earth, heading toward Misa’s property. Middle: (Intrigue): The ship crashes into Misa’s outhouse, causing chaos and confusion.
Ending: (Misinterpretation): Misa confronts the spaceship with a blowtorch, assuming all of it is a hallucination as Bill hides in terror.

9. INT. BILL’S SPACESHIP
Misa enters the ship. Bill runs in, tries to stop her. She offers to fix the toilet. With her blow torch tries to fix the spaceship toilet. The heat triggers a device, which emits a beam that bounces off the toilet’s broken mirror. Bill’s body (with Misa) looks down, laughs hysterically, I’m way too high. She exits
Scene Arc: Starts with Misa and Bill in their own bodies, ends with them swapped.
Essence: Bill and Misa swap bodies.
Conflict: They are in the wrong bodies.
Subtext: How can they function?
Hope/fear: Hope Misa will fix the spaceship. Fear Misa will break it further.

Beginning (Suspense): Misa boldly enters the spaceship, determined to fix the toilet.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Bill panics and tries to stop her, but Misa’s high state leads to comical yet dangerous attempts at repair.
Ending: (Major Twist): The malfunctioning device causes a body swap, leaving Misa and Bill in each other’s bodies, adding to the confusion.

10. INT. MISA’S HOUSE – DAY
Bill’s body (with Misa) enters her home, passes out on the bed. Misa’s cat runs away.
Scene Arc: Starts with Bill’s body (with Misa in it) body awake and ends with them passed out.
Essence: Misa is really high and in Bill’s body.
Conflict: This is not Misa’s body.
Subtext: Misa doesn’t realize she’s body swapped
Hope/fear: Hope Misa realizes she’s swapped bodies. Fear she won’t and won’t unswap?

Beginning: (Suspense): Bill’s body (with Misa) stumbles into the house, disoriented.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): The cat reacts fearfully to the unfamiliar presence, adding to the chaos.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Bill’s body (with Misa) collapses on the bed, what will happen next.

11. INT. SPACESHIP
Misa’s body (with Bill) panics, tries to get the onboard computer working. Nope.
Scene Arc: Starts with Misa’s body (with Bill) panicking and ends with them still panicking.
Essence: Bill needs to get away.
Conflict: Can Misa’s body (with Bill) get the ship or at least the computer working?
Subtext: Misa’s body (with Bill) is stranded.
Hope/fear: Hope to get the onboard computer working. Fear can’t repair it.

Beginning: (Suspense): Misa’s body (with Bill) frantically tries to operate the spaceship’s computer. Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Bill’s lack of knowledge and panic cause several failed attempts at fixing the systems.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): The onboard computer remains unresponsive, increasing the tension and urgency.

12. INT. MISA’S HOUSE – DAY
Bill’s body (with Misa in it) goes to a mirror, as Misa’s body (with Bill) walks in. Still high!
Bill’s body (with Misa) is hungry, they try to cook food but clumsy. Misa’s body (with Bill) watches. Eventually, their inability to function with her kitchen pushes them over the edge. Misa doesn’t believe in aliens, in fact she hates the whole concept of aliens. Note: write this like a comedy sketch.

Scene Arc: Starts trying to cook. Ends with them realizing the seriousness of the problem.
Essence: Misa and Bill have trouble using the bodies they are in.
Conflict: Misa and Bill trying to control their bodies and failing.
Subtext: Misa still hasn’t accepted the body swap. She doesn’t believe in Aliens.
Hope/fear: Hope Misa will realize her body swapped. Fear Misa won’t.

Beginning: (Intrigue): Bill’s body (with Misa) looks in the mirror, confused by the reflection.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): They struggle comically with basic tasks in the kitchen, highlighting the absurdity of their situation.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Misa’s frustration boils over as she refuses to believe in aliens, even in the midst of undeniable evidence.

13. EXT. MISA’S HOUSE – DAY
They go over what happened trying to determine how they swapped. Try to go backwards through what happened the night before, literally backwards, walk backwards, talk backwards.
Scene Arc: Starts with them believing they can unswap their bodies. Ends with them realizing it won’t be easy.
Essence: Can they determine how they swapped?
Conflict: Can they figure out how to unswap their bodies?
Subtext: They are really stuck.
Hope/fear: Hope they can figure out how to unswap. Fear they’re stuck in the wrong body.

Beginning: (Suspense): They start retracing their steps from the previous night, trying to understand the body swap.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Their literal backward retracing leads to comical and awkward interactions.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): They realize that reversing the swap won’t be as simple as they hoped.

14. INT. BILL’S SPACESHIP – DAY
They try to fix the ship. Misa’s body (with Bill) seems to have no mechanical aptitude or understanding about his ship. Hints that no one is coming to find Bill. Bill’s body (with Misa) is angry with Misa’s body (with Bill) – Bill’s body throws tools at Misa’s body but then realizes she could damage her own body. Bill’s body (with Misa in it) starts to suffer from ‘Earth sickness’. Misa’s body (with Bill in it) claims it’s just an adjustment.
Scene Arc: Starts with them trying to fix the ship. Ends with them realizing they are on their own to figure out repairs.
Essence: The body swap causes problems.
Conflict: Can they fix the ship? Can they even get along?
Subtext: No one going to help them.
Hope/fear: Hope they can fix the spaceship. Fear they’ll damage it further.

Beginning: (Suspense): They attempt to repair the spaceship with little success.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Misa’s body (with Bill) struggles, causing frustration and a fight.
Ending: (Cliffhanger): Bill’s body (with Misa) begins showing symptoms of ‘Earth sickness.’

15. EXT. MISA’S HOUSE – DAY
Bill’s body (with Misa) has to teach Misa’s body (with Bill) how to drive.
Scene Arc: Starts with Misa’s body (with Bill) barely understanding the car ends with Misa’s body (with Bill) driving.
Essence: Misa’s body (with Bill) needs to do the driving.
Conflict: Misa’s body (with Bill) can’t seem to drive.
Subtext: They can’t get caught.
Hope/fear: Hope Bill can learn to drive. Fear he won’t be able to drive.

Beginning: (Intrigue): Misa’s body (with Bill) barely understanding the car, creating a sense of uncertainty.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Misa’s body (with Bill) struggles hilariously to drive, causing both frustration and awkwardness.
Ending: (Suspense): Misa’s body (with Bill) starts driving but with signs of trouble ahead.

16. INT. MISA’S HOUSE – DAY
To avoid suspicion, Misa needs to go to the Farmer’s Market to earn money for repairs. To hide Bill’s body (with Misa in it) they wear a Big Foot costume as a disguise.
Scene Arc: Begin in Misa’s house, end with them ready to leave for the Farmer’s Market.
Essence: Trying to keep things normal.
Conflict: If anyone sees Bill’s body something terrible will happen.
Subtext: The authorities will harm Bill’s body if it’s seen.
Hope/fear: Hope the disguise will work. Fear it won’t work.

Beginning: (External Dilemma) Go to the Farmer’s Market to get money or keep hiding at Misa’s?
Middle: (Character changes radically) Bill’s body (with Misa) wears the Big Foot costume
End: (Cliff hanger) Will the disguise work?

17. EXT. ROAD – DAY
Deputy Rhoades pulls them over. Deputy Rhoades accuses them of being drunk or high but Misa’s body (with Bill) passes the breathalyzer. Can’t hassle Bill’s body because it’s against the law to harass Big Foot.
Scene Arc: Starts with them being pulled over. Ends with them continuing to town.
Essence: Deputy Rhoades suspects something.
Conflict: Being pulled over and subjected to sobriety tests.
Subtext: They are in danger.
Hope/fear: Hope they can fool Deputy Rhoades. Fear he’ll find out their secret.

Beginning: (Suspense): They get pulled over by Deputy Rhoades.
Middle: (Uncertainty): Misa’s body (with Bill) tries to pass the sobriety tests, with each step raising tension about whether they will succeed.
Ending: (Superior Position): They pass the tests and continue to town, but we know Deputy Rhoades is still suspicious.

18. EXT. FARMER’S MARKET – DAY
The Big Foot costume causes hilarious confusion at the farmer’s market. Misa’s body (with Bill) is a good, if goofy as he tries to imitate feminine qualities, salesman. Farmer’s Market manager confronts them tries to remove Big Foot’s head.
Scene Arc: Starts with them at the Farmer’s Market. Ends with them leaving disguise intact.
Essence: They need to pretend to be normal and earn money for repairs.
Conflict: The farmer’s market manager hates Misa and goes after her.
Subtext: Misa has caused problems in the past.
Hope/fear: Hope the trip will be a success. Fear they will be found out.

Beginning: (More interesting setting): Arriving at the lively farmer’s market in the Big Foot costume.
Middle: (Misinterpretation): Misa’s body (with Bill) makes goofy sales attempts, leading people to think it’s a marketing stunt.
Ending: (Surprise): The market manager tries to remove the Big Foot head, creating panic for them.

19. EXT. FARMER’S MARKET PARKING LOT – DAY
Deputy Rhoades notices Misa’s body (Bill in it) acting odd, uncoordinated. He suspects drug use – confronts them should Misa’s body (with Bill) be driving?
Scene Arc: Starts with them safely leaving. Ends with them convincing Deputy Rhoades all is well.
Essence: Deputy Rhoades finds Misa’s behavior suspicious.
Conflict: Deputy Rhoades tries to get Misa’s body to not drive.
Subtext: Deputy Rhoades is onto something.
Hope/fear: Hope Misa’s body (with Bill) passes the sobriety check. Fear will fail it.

Beginning: (Suspense): Deputy Rhoades spots them acting odd as they leave the market.
Middle: (Mislead / Reveal): Rhoades suspects drug use and tries to intervene, creating tension. Ending: (Uncertainty): They manage to convince Rhoades all is well, but just barely.

20. EXT. MISA’S PROPERTY – DAY

Deputy Rhoades ‘investigates’ Misa’s property.
Scene Arc: Starts with Deputy Rhoades on the property snooping around. Ends with him leaving, (note: need a funny reason).
Essence: Deputy Rhoades suspects something is going on.
Conflict: Will Deputy Rhoades see Bill’s body or the spaceship?
Subtext: Deputy Rhoades doesn’t want to be seen.
Hope/fear: Hope Deputy Rhoades will go away. Fear Deputy Rhoades will see Bill’s body.

Beginning: (Intrigue): Deputy Rhoades snoops around the property.
Middle: (Suspense): He gets dangerously close to discovering Bill’s body or the spaceship.
Ending: (Surprise): Deputy Rhoades leaves abruptly, raising more questions.

21. INT. MISA’S HOUSE – DAY

Bill’s body (with Misa in it) is physically struggling. Misa’s body (with Bill) shares that Bill’s body can’t live long on Earth. He’s been sabotaging repairs. On his home planet, he’s just a janitor who wasn’t allowed to join spaceforce. Shift their focus on fixing Bill’s spaceship.
Scene Arc: Begins with them focused on unswapping bodies. Ends with them focused on repairing Bill’s spaceship.
Essence: Bill’s body will get sicker and die.
Conflict: Misa’s body (with Bill) has sabotaged repairs and Misa’s been getting sicker.
Subtext: Bill starting to care about Misa.
Hope/fear: Hope Bill’s body (with Misa) gets better. Hope they fix the ship. Fear Bill’s body with die. Fear they can’t fix the ship.

Beginning: (Suspense): Bill’s body (with Misa) is visibly getting sicker.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma): Misa’s body (with Bill) reveals sabotage due to feeling useless, causing a shift in focus.
Ending: (Uncertainty): They decide to fix the spaceship, unsure if they can succeed in time.

22. INT. MISA’S WORKSHOP – DAY
Bill and Misa work together in Misa’s lab to create a product for the Earth Day festival to win the best product contest and buy supplies to fix the ship. Bill shares that most planet’s dominant species trash their planet. Misa shares her fear of people’s belief in aliens – they think aliens will come fix everything.
Scene Arc: Begins with them working in the lab. Ends with them increasing their understanding of each other.
Essence: They must figure out how to fix the spaceship on their own.
Conflict: Are the new products good enough? Can they win? Can they fix the ship?
Subtext: Bill and Misa bond.
Hope/fear: Hope they can fix the ship. Fear that they can’t and Bill’s body is stuck on Earth.

Beginning: (Intrigue): They begin working on a new product for the Earth Day festival.
Middle: (Character changes radically): Bill shares insights about other planets, showing unexpected depth.
Ending: (Hope / Fear): They bond and hope to win the contest but fear their efforts may fall short.

23. EXT. EARTH DAY FESTIVAL – STAGE – DAY
Misa’s body (with Bill) explains the products at the Earth Day festival and makes hilarious mistakes. Bill’s body (with Misa) in the Big Foot costume is there. During the presentation, they are confronted by attendees at the festival about the environmental damage caused by Misa’s family’s businesses – accused of hypocrisy for creating ‘good products.’ They don’t win best product.
Scene Arc: Misa’s body (with Bill) presenting their products. Ends with them losing and Misa shamed.
Essence: They compete for best product.
Conflict: Misa is a fraud her family is wealthy from poisoning Earth.
Subtext: Nothing Misa can do will compensate for what her family did.
Hope/fear: Hope they win the prize. Fear they don’t win the prize.

Beginning: (Misinterpretation): Misa’s body (with Bill) makes hilarious mistakes during the presentation.
Middle: (Betrayal): Attendees accuse Misa of hypocrisy, family is wealthy from businesses that created environmental damage, leading to a tense confrontation.
Ending: (Uncertainty): They don’t win the prize, leaving Misa feeling ashamed and uncertain about how to proceed.

24. EXT. EARTH DAY FESTIVAL PARKING LOT – DAY
The representative for a major retailer (that Misa’s hates) finds them. The retailer wants to stock the products. Bill’s body (with Misa) in the Big Foot costume tries to scare the rep. Misa’s body (with Bill) grabs Bill’s body (with Misa) dressed as Big Foot. They step away from the rep and argue. Without the money, Misa will die in his body!
Scene Arc: Starts with them leaving. Ends with them having money for repairs.
Essence: They get the funds to buy supplies to repair the spaceship.
Conflict: Will Misa accept the order from a company she hates?
Subtext: Bill desperate to fix his ship.
Hope/fear: Hope Misa will accept the money. Fear she will not.

Beginning: (Intrigue): The retailer approaches with an offer.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Bill’s body (with Misa) in the Big Foot costume tries to scare the rep.
Ending: (External Dilemma): Bill & Misa argue about accepting money from a hated company, needing funds for repairs.

25. EXT. EARTH DAY FESTIVAL PARKING LOT – DAY
Bill’s body (with Misa) passes out in the parking lot. Deputy Rhoades confronts them. Concludes that Big Foot is a bad influence on Misa, they are both using drugs. He suggests rehab. It worked for him! Misa’s body (with Bill) says they will talk about. Deputy Rhoades helps get Bill’s body (with Misa, in Big Foot costume) into the car.
Scene Arc: From happily leaving the festival. Ends with them needing help to get Bill’s body in the car.
Essence: Bill’s body is getting very sick.
Conflict: Deputy Rhoades thinks Misa’s body should go immediately to rehab.
Subtext: Deputy Rhoades thinks it’s substance abuse because he suffered from it.
Hope/fear: Can they convince Deputy Rhoades to let them leave or not?

Beginning: (Suspense) Bill’s body (with Misa) collapses in the parking lot.
Middle: (Misinterpretation /Reveal) Deputy Rhoades thinks substance abuse is the cause and suggests rehab. Deputy Rhoades was in rehab
Ending: (Cliffhanger): They barely manage to get Bill’s body (with Misa) into the car, with Rhoades helping them.
26. INT. SPACESHIP – DAY
Bill and Misa fix the spaceship.
Scene Arc: Starts with the ship not working. Ends with the ship working.
Essence: The fix the spaceship.
Conflict: Will their plan for repairs work. Can the work together to get it done?
Subtext: Bill is taking responsibility for getting the ship repaired.
Hope/fear: Hope the repairs work. Fear they will not.

Beginning: (Suspense): They start working on the ship with urgency.
Middle: (Uncertainty): Each step of the repair process has potential for failure, keeping them on edge.
Ending: (Hope / Fear): The ship finally works, but will it hold up?

27. EXT. MISA’S PROPERTY – DAY
Deputy Rhoades snoops around Misa’s property. They test the spaceship and get it to lift off. Deputy Rhoades sees the spaceship and Bill’s actual body. He starts to run away. Deputy Rhoades comes back. Bill and Misa convince him to keep it to themselves and they won’t tell anyone about his rehab episode. He exits when he gets a call.
Scene Arc: Starts with Deputy Rhoades suspicion about Misa’s sobriety. Ends with him helping repair a spaceship and keeping their secret.
Essence: Deputy Rhoades finds out about Bill.
Conflict: Deputy Rhoades has conflict about what he sees and what it means for his sobriety. Bill and Misa are afraid of what he will do now that he’s found out.
Subtext: Bill and Misa afraid of what Deputy Rhoades will with his new knowledge.
Hope/fear: Hope Deputy Rhoades will keep their secret. Fear he will tell the authorities.

Beginning: (Suspense): Rhoades starts snooping again, closer than ever to the truth.
Middle: (Mislead / Reveal): He sees the spaceship and Bill’s actual body, running away in shock. Ending: (Cliffhanger): Bill and Misa convince him to keep their secret, but his exit call leaves their fate uncertain.

28. EXT. MISA’S PROPERTY – DAY
Scene Arc: Misa’ body (with Bill) offers to stay on Earth and let Bill’s body (with Misa) leave rather than have her die in his body from Earth’s harmful effects. Bill’s body (with Misa) refuses to leave. She loves Earth too much.
Scene Arc: Starts with Bill offering to let Misa leave. Ends with Misa refusing to leave Earth.
Essence: Bill offers to save Misa.
Conflict: Bill’s body (with Misa) is sick
Subtext: Bill blames himself for Misa’s illness.
Hope/fear: Hope Bill’s body (with Misa) will leave. Fear Bill’s body (with Misa) will die.

Beginning: (Intrigue): Misa’s body (with Bill) offers to let Bill’s body (with Misa) so she won’t die.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma): Misa struggles with the decision, loving Earth too much to leave.
Ending: (Hope / Fear): Misa decides to stay but fears the consequences of her choice.

29. INT. BILL’S SPACESHIP – DAY
Bill’s body (with Misa) tests the repaired spaceship toilet, causing sparks that reverse the swap.
Scene Arc: Start with swapped bodies. Ends with unswapped bodies.
Essence: They unswap bodies.
Conflict: Bill wants Misa to leave in his body.
Subtext: They can both be in the right place.
Hope/fear: The swap worked/they are stuck in the wrong body.

Beginning: (Suspense) Will Misa’s body (with Bill) leave.
Middle: (Surprise) The toilet sparks, unexpectedly reversing the swap.
End: (Character changes radically) They unswap bodies.

30. EXT. MISA’S PROPERTY – DAY
Bill and Misa exchange hugs and tears.
Scene Arc: From being together to being apart.
Essence: Bill and Misa say goodbye.
Conflict: none.
Subtext: They care about each other.
Hope/fear:

Beginning: (Intrigue): They prepare to say goodbye, emotions running high.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): The farewell is emotional, awkward, and heartfelt.
Ending: (Suspense): They part ways, uncertain of what the future holds.

31. INT. BILL’S SPACESHIP
Bill flies home willing to face punishment for his bad deeds and earning his place on his planet’s spaceforce and promises to keep aliens away from Earth (note: this needs to be set up better)
Scene Arc: From Bill entering his spaceship to Bill flying away.
Essence: Bill leaves Earth
Conflict: Can he make the trip home?
Subtext: Bill is willing to face the consequences for his actions
Hope/fear: Bill is safely on his way/ Something happens to Bill

Beginning: (Suspense): Bill enters his spaceship, ready to leave
Middle: (Uncertainty): Bill is tense as he enters his flight plan home.
Ending: (Hope / Fear): Bill successfully leaves Earth, hopeful but uncertain about his return home.

32. EXT. FARMER’S MARKET – DAY
Misa seeks out the manager of the farmer’s market asking to work together on environmental issues.
Scene Arc: From Misa being alone to reaching out to others to help save Earth.
Essence: Misa reaches out to others to help Earth
Conflict: Misa and the Farmer’s Market manager don’t get along.
Subtext: Misa needs to work with others to achieve her goals
Hope/fear: The farmer’s market manager will be receptive/ The manager will be nasty to Misa.

Beginning: (Suspense): Misa approaches the manager, tension high.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): The conversation is awkward, with their past issues lingering.
Ending: (Hope / Fear): Misa proposes working together, hoping for a positive response but fearing rejection.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Terrie Shaft.

[Pam Ewing]

Pam’s Fascinating Scenes
Vision: Become a Writing Athlete
What I’ve learned: I need working AC to get through a Midwest summer

ACT 1
Scene Arc: Starts with success and ends in humiliation and mental breakdown
SCENE 1
INT. BACKSTAGE OF CONFERENCE HALL – DAY
Maia confronts nemesis and walks way overly confident
• Essence: Sets up Maia as successful, intelligent, fearful fighter
• Conflict: Maia is idealistic in verbal sparring with ruthless, practical Nemesis
• Subtext: what is success/a win
• Hope/fear: Hope she succeeds as she seems likeable but fear she’ll lose because she’s too idealistic
o Beginning: Maia is surprised as she is confronted by Nemesis of company she is taking over (Surprise)
o Middle: He insults her but she is calmly in control (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: He departs with a low blow which she tries to shake off (Uncertainty)
SCENE 2
INT. STAGE WING OF CONFERENCE HALL – DAY
Maia is shaken by Nemesis but tries to build herself up while she’s being introduced
• Essence: Maia’s corporate success feels flimsy
• Conflict: Maia is fighting her poor childhood flashbacks
• Subtext: success and failure hold hands
• Hope/fear: we hope she can succeed but fear that her childhood wounds will sink her
o Beginning: Maia gathers her shattered confidence (External Dilemma)
o Middle: She has a flashback that directly contradicts the speaker (Internal Dilemma)
o Ending: Maia screams just as her name is called to the podium (Character Changes radically)

SCENE 3
INT. MORGUE – NIGHT
25 YEARS AGO
In a flashback, Maia is a child cleaning the morgue with her parents
• Essence: introducing Maia’s wound
• Conflict: timid Maia has a real fear
• Subtext: character is facing your fears, even if pushed
• Hope/fear: we hope that nothing bad will happen but we fear something will traumatize her
o Beginning: Dutiful child mopping hospital linoleum floor (Mislead)
o Middle: Her mop hits a wheel and a gurney moves (Suspense)
o Ending: worried the child looks up and a dead face turns to her (Reveal)

SCENE 4
INT. CONFERENCE HALL PODIUM – DAY
Maia’s name is called and she walks onto stage, nods to Ollie in front row, starts to give her speech
• Essence: Sets up Maia’s self congratulating and coping mannerisms, intro her friend, Ollie
• Conflict: Maia is walking as she did as a child in the morgue
• Subtext: personal success is moment by moment
• Hope/fear: Hope she will gather her wits and be a leader; fear she will sink into childhood fears
o Beginning: Maia has returned confident, in control (Suspense)
o Middle: As the applause dies down she begins her speech as a single person clapping enters to stand next to her (Intrigue)
o Ending: Maia turns to see Nemesis apologizing for a change of plan Maia introduces him (Cliffhanger)

SCENE 5
INT. CONFERENCE HALL STAGE – DAY
Nemesis joins a surprised Maia on stage and cuts off her speech to announce his takeover of her
• Essence: Nemesis engineers a way to humiliate her and make himself look strong
• Conflict: Nemesis wins; he invades her body space where his “cologne” causes her to freak and pass out
• Subtext: do we win at any cost
• Hope/fear: we hope that she is able to walk away but fear that Nemesis is the last man standing
o Beginning: Maia questions Nemesis – makes a joke that it was not a friendly takeover (Intrigue)
o Middle: Nemesis explains she had a great idea about the synergy of their companies but just lacked the ruthlessness/vision/cold-bloodedness to pull it off, so he found an angel investor and he has acquired her (Betrayal)
o Ending: while the audience murmurs and yell questions, he sprays Maia with something and she freaks out then passes out (Character changes radically)

SCENE 6
Scene Arc: Maia is locked in a sanitarium room, breaks out, Ollie breaks in, together they escape
INT. SANITARIUM – NIGHT
Maia comes to in restraints being dumped in her locked room
• Essence: we learn that Nemesis has planned this so he must fear her
• Conflict: Maia can’t fight the restraints so she’s resigned
• Subtext: when to accept fate and when to escape
• Hope/fear: We hope she’ll figure a way out but fear she might not
o Beginning: Maia comes to strapped on a gurney being wheeled down a hospital corridor – not exactly the corridor of power she desired (External Dilemma)
o Middle: She pretends to be waking up as she flops all over while the restraints are removed and she is dumped on a bed (Mislead)
o Ending: After the attendants have left she reveals that she has stolen a key (Reveal) and she falls back into a stupor (Cliffhanger)

SCENE 7
INT. SANITARIUM – DAY
Maia awakens and sets about unlocking the door by putting her hand through the food slot
• Essence: Maia is plotting the best time to escape as the howls and laughter of the patients taunt her
• Conflict: Maia’s wound is makes her feel worthless and having trouble fighting
• Subtext: when to accept fate and when to escape
• Hope/fear: We fear Maia can overcome her wound but fear that she cannot escape
o Beginning: Unlocks the door by slipping working the keys through the food slot. She unlocks the door but slips back into the room as she hears footsteps (Intrigue)
o Middle: is startled as her breakfast is slid in the slot just as she plans to open the door – Houdini, indeed (Surprise)
o Ending: She waits until the coast is clear but her door is being unlocked from the outside so she pretends to sleep (Mystery)

SCENE 8
EXT. SANITARIUM – DAY
Ollie has broken into her room with a wheelchair
• Essence: adding horror elements and showing her ingenuity
• Conflict: Maia against the institution
• Subtext: sometimes our wounds land us in a real prison
• Hope/fear: we hope that she can escape but she doesn’t seem up to the task
o Beginning: Ollie enters and frightens her (Surprise)
o Middle: Maia is happy but quickly tells Ollie that she had it under control (Superior position)
o Ending: Ollie gets her into the wheelchair – you were unlocked but without a plan – I was drugged – oh like it was your first time – I’m not the druggie here (Suspense)

SCENE 9
INT. SANITARIUM – DAY
Ollie breaks into the sanitarium room to rescue Maia
• Essence: establish Ollie as loyal, wacky, successful bumbler
• Conflict: Ollie cons staff into finding Maia then finds Maia already out of her room and they bicker
• Subtext: when is help not helpful
• Hope/fear: we hope Ollie can rescue Maia but we fear Maia may blow her cover
o Beginning: Ollie lays out the plan as she drapes a blanket to hide the unused restraints (Suspense)
o Middle: As Ollie wheels Maia out of the room, Maia again plays doped up, they are confronted (Suspense)
o Ending: Ollie spins a great excuse and they make it to the elevator and out the first floor where Ollie trips the alarm – on purpose (Intrigue)

SCENE 10
INT. CAR – DAY
Maia and Ollie make it to the escape car and bicker- Ollie triggers the alarm (You’ll want them to look for you and get the press on your side, especially since I have the perfect hideout)
• Essence: breather to make the spa a reasonable hideout and build their friendship
• Conflict: Ollie insists on driving Maia’s car and using Maia’s credit
• Subtext: why can’t Maia just accept a rescue
• Hope/fear: we hope Ollie’s planned hideout will work but we fear that she messes things up
o Beginning: Maia is mad that their escape is ruined as she runs to Ollie’s car, now they will follow us (Uncertainty)
o Middle: Ollie hides Maia under the mess in her backseat as she explains (Intrigue)
o Ending: Ollie waves to the guard and explains she wants to get home before the drama begins then tells Maia that if she didn’t sound the alarm Maia would come up with her own plan but Ollie has the perfect hideout (Cliffhanger)

ACT 2
Scene 11
Scene Arc: Arrive at spa and Maia has agreed to accept hiding out and healing here
INT. CAR – DAY
Ollie and Maia bicker and discuss major philosophical issues, was Maia’s company really taken over, and Ollie extolls the benefits of the selective spa
• Essence: Establish Ollie, their friendship and key motivations – don’t worry your credit is still good
• Conflict: they bicker like an old married couple
• Subtext: closer than a brother/sister
• Hope/fear: we hope Ollie does have the perfect hideout but we fear that she is a loose cannon
o Beginning: Maia climbs out from the backseat junk into the front checking if the doors are unlocked – not (External Dilemma)
o Middle: Ollie is so cocky about the privacy of the spa and its treatments (Intrigue)
o End: Though Maia protests she tries to endure the ride as she moans about how unfair life can be (Uncomfortable Moment)

SCENE 12
EXT. SPA LOADING DOCK – DAY
At employee entrance Maia meets promising Dr. Jeremy then upsets him while Dr. Kari observes
• Essence: Maia and Dr. Jeremy seem to spark to each other until she upset the research he is unloading and he gets angry and she is grossed out by the gory mess. Subtlety we see Dr. Kari becomes involved even though she seemed to be involved in shipment out marked ‘medical tissue’ or ‘human organ’
• Conflict: Maia and Dr. Jeremy push/pull and Dr. Kari observing
• Subtext: is there love at first sight
• Hope/fear: We hope Maia encounters a positive relationship but we fear Dr. Jeremy is unstable
o Beginning: While Maia is distracted, Ollie selects the employee entrance (Intrigue)
o Middle: There is a lot going on, Maia can now exit the car and approaches handsome, friendly Dr. Jeremy moving his sensitive experiments but Maia thinks he’s there to greet them and flirts by touching his experiment so he is outraged (Character changes radically)
o Ending: Ollie brings the suitcases as Dr. Kari approaches calmly upset but ends up welcoming them (Uncomfortable Moment)

SCENE 13
INT. SPA BEDROOM – DAY
Maia and Ollie settle into their room as Maia views it as a prison
• Essence: grumbling Maia tries to acclimate
• Conflict: Ollie teases about Dr. Jeremy
• Subtext: can I have some privacy please
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia and Ollie are able to put up with each other but we worry Ollie might not be a good friend
o Beginning: Ollie plops into her bed as Maia unpacks and complains about the clothes Ollie brought for her (Uncertainty)
o Middle: Ollie reads their itinerary, orientation tomorrow morning, promise to be polite (Uncertainty)
o Ending: Maia maybe I need a secret identity – YES! (mystery)

SCENE 14
INT. SPA DINING ROOM – DAY
Dr. Kari walks through the welcome details with staff and flirts while showing Dr Jeremy the operation
• Essence: set up Dr. Kari’s sharp condescension to staff and how she first with Dr. Jeremy; We hear about how she cured her cancer and has used the same protocol to help others. Is Dr. Jeremy interested in Dr. Kari.
• Conflict: Dr. Kari’s staff are pleasantly robotic opposite and Dr. Jeremy seems glued to Dr. Kari’s side
• Subtext: the masks we wear
• Hope/fear: we hope Dr. Kari is nicer than she seems but she is in charge
o Beginning: Dr. Kari is warm and welcoming and shares how she cured cancer but is violently angry at a staff member (Character changes radically)
o Middle: Dr. Jeremy seems in awe of Dr. Kari (Mislead)
o Ending: As soon as Dr. Kari’s speech is over Dr. Jeremy flees in search of Maia (Reveal) angering Dr. Kari

SCENE 15
INT. SPA DINING ROOM – NIGHT
Maia and Ollie meets other guests and discuss weird spa treatments then guests eat and party
• Essence: Shows Ollie’s buy in to events, introduces guest that Maia will hang out with, introduce guest who will be Maia’s new friend
• Conflict: one of the guests extolls the mind treatments that improved her attitude and reduced her pain to Maia becomes physically ill
• Subtext: bloom where you are planted
• Hope/fear: We hope Maia will heal and have a good time, we fear something is wrong with spa
o Beginning: A specialized spa with good results despite weird treatments (Uncertainty)
o Middle: The description of the treatments makes Maia physically ill (Mystery)
o Ending: Guest friend comforts Maia saying she’ll come to enjoy the treatments (Suspense)

SCENE 16
INT. SPA BEDROOM – DAY
Ollie is excited about her weird treatment and pushes a hung over Maia to get going
• Essence: building the spa world, Ollie mentioning her mind impregnation treatment
• Conflict: Ollie and Maia have friendly antagonism and based on Ollie’s ditzy behavior we wonder how they are friends
• Subtext: can we be friends with someone so different
• Hope/fear: given how weird the treatments seem we hope they will be helpful/healthful but we fear mind impregnation is fraught with problems
o Beginning: Maia dreads going to treatments and Ollie is totally hyped (Internal Dilemma)
o Middle: Maia pushes herself to try spa and pushes doubts away (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: Maia reviews her treatment agenda ignoring something (Superior Position)

SCENE 17
Scene Arc: Trying to heal at the spa but keep finding things just don’t add up
EXT. HOT TUB – NIGHT
Maia connects with her new friend after her day at the spa then Dr. Jeremy approaches
• Essence: compare spa experiences, learn more about friend, connect with Dr. Jeremy
• Conflict: Dr. Jeremy apologizes but somehow it just sets Maia’s temper flaring
• Subtext: are connections always meant to be pleasant
• Hope/fear: We hope Maia can bond with Dr. Jeremy but fear neither has the temperament for it
o Beginning: Maia discusses treatments in the hot tub with new guest friend (Internal Dilemma)
o Middle: Dr. Jeremy tries to apologize but ticks off Maia (Character Changes Radically)
o Ending: Maia tries to escape Dr. Jeremy who blacks her trying to explain (External Dilemma)

SCENE 18
INT. SPA TREATMENTS MONTAGUE – DAY
Maia hates her weird treatments, Ollie is in bliss
• Essence: shows the twisted gory treatments, contrasts Ollie’s response to Maia’s fears; Maia connects with new friend, Ollie’s mind treatment induces robotic behavior
• Conflict: The spa treatments are gory and challenging
• Subtext: at what price beauty – is this relaxing
• Hope/fear: We hope that Maia will mend, make friends, move on to deal with the humiliation and loss of her company but we fear how much a spa vacation can accomplish
o Beginning: Maia troubled and physically annoyed while Ollie in bliss (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Middle: Maia getting accidentally sucked into treatment trying to flee (External Dilemma)
o Ending: Maia exhausted and Ollie delighted after even more strenuous treatments (Mystery)

SCENE 19
INT. TREATMENT ROOM – DAY
Ollie gets her brain training session
• Essence: Show the brain treatment starting with fulfilment of fantasy and includes the insertion of idea of welcoming death
• Conflict: mentally fighting the idea of welcoming death
• Subtext: the connection of fulfilment and death
• Hope/fear: we hope Ollie (and other guests) survive this and come out stronger, but they could die
o Beginning: Ollie excited with her agenda of where her mind treatment will go (Mislead)
o Middle: Ollie’s therapy shows not one she requested but brainwashing (Superior Position)
o Ending: Ollie’s session ends with a robotic response from Ollie (Reveal)

SCENE 20
INT. SPA HOT TUB – NIGHT
Maia unwinds with her new guest friend, Dr. Kari checks in and gives advice, after Dr. Kari leaves Dr. Jeremy tries to apologize
• Essence: growing friendship and exchange of personal information
• Conflict: Dr. Kari is menacing and there noticeable issue with her skin. Will Maia forgive Dr. Jeremy- should she?
• Subtext: can you really ever relax
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia can recuperate but we fear something is wrong with the treatments
o Beginning: Dr. Jeremy wants to talk but sees Dr. Kari approaching and takes off (Mystery)
o Middle: Dr. Kari checks in and Maia’s guest friend gives a robotic response, startling Maia (Surprise)
o Ending: Dr. Kari pushes Maia for similar response then pushes for personal information and leaves unhappy (Intrigue)

SCENE 21
MONTAGE: PASSAGE OF DAYS AT SPA
Relationships and treatments progress
• Essence: shows the passage of time and plants seeds of concern
• Conflict: Ollie seems to be sucked in more and more to mind control
• Subtext: what do we control or let control us
• Hope/fear: we hope the grasp of the treatments will be beneficial but we fear something is wrong
o Beginning: Maia tries to skip a treatment but is discovered and forced to attend (External Dilemma)
o Middle: Ollie is in the same mind control treatment (Mystery)
o Ending: The treatment is mind control and Maia find it is having no effect on her (Cliffhanger)

SCENE 22
INT. MAIA’S ROOM – NIGHT
Ollie is missing but Maia is exhausted so they do not touch base but Maia sees one of Ollie’s treatment material/devise and finds it concerning
• Essence: building concern and mystery in Maia’s mind
• Conflict: Maia vs the treatments
• Subtext: trust
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia can uncover the mystery before someone is harmed but we fear for Ollie
o Beginning: After treatment Ollie disappears so Maia waits for her and investigates her stuff
o Middle: One of Ollie’s treatment creams releases a smell that makes Maia pass out and we see the trigger from mind treatments (Superior Position)
o Ending: Maia has nightmares (Uncomfortable Moment)

SCENE 23
INT. DR. KARI’S OFFICE – NIGHT
Dr. Kari looks over the guests’ treatments. She sees and article on Maia on the internet and thinks as she unwraps part of her skin.
• Essence: Dr. Kari is trying to determine how to manage the guests and leaves a note to change Maia’s treatment then steps into a treatment chamber
• Conflict: what is she doing with her skin
• Subtext: masks
• Hope/fear: we hope she is not evil but we fear her controlling behavior and skin issue is sick
o Beginning: Dr. Kari sees that Maia’s intake profile does not match her (Betrayal)
o Middle: Dr. Kari discovers Maia on the internet and her humiliation and considers her options (Internal Dilemma)
o Ending: Dr. Kari adjusts her skin and retreats to her connected lab (Cliffhanger)

Scene arc: Maia decides she needs to investigate but can’t find an ally
SCENE 24
INT. DINNING HALL – DAY
Maia asks her new guest friend some leading questions and gets cryptic, unhelpful answers
• Essence: new guest friend distances herself from Maia
• Conflict: Maia loses friend
• Subtext: danger of questions
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia can solve this but fear she’s found something real and dangerous
o Beginning: Maia notices people are not who they where when she met them (Suspense)
o Middle: New friend moves away from Maia (Intrigue)
o Ending: Maia is isolated and concerned (Mystery)

SCENE 25
INT. DR. JEREMY’S LAB – DAY
Dr. Kari is overseeing Dr. Jeremy’s work and seeks answers about possible applications (implying evil apps)
• Essence: To give Dr. Kari and Dr. Jeremy depth and add a twist for Maia at the end
• Conflict: Dr. Jeremy doesn’t like anyone touching his work, not even Dr. Kari
• Subtext: Dr. Kari’s question raises the stakes for Dr. Jeremy
• Hope/fear: We hope Dr. Jeremy will be a good guy, but we fear he’s made a pact with the devil, Dr. Kari
o Beginning: Dr. Kari reviews Dr. Jeremy’s work (Mislead)
o Middle: She tries to get information about Maia (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: She pushes to use his research to reanimate tissue on cadavers (Reveal)

SCENE 26
INT. SPECIAL TREATMENT ROOM – NIGHT
Guest friend submitting to being killed – using language in Ollie’s brain sessions
• Essence: shows the scary death awaiting guests
• Conflict: the incongruity that someone would submit to death
• Subtext: Dr. Kari’s question raises the stakes for Dr. Jeremy
• Hope/fear: We hope this won’t happen to anyone else but the lack of honor given Guest the more we believe this is designed for everyone
o Beginning: Maia guest friend goes to mind treatment (Uncertainty)
o Middle: Guest friend feels sublime (Mystery)
o Ending: Guest enters a chamber and blood spurts against a translucent wall (Major Twist)

SCENE 27
Scene Arc: Both Maia and Dr. Jeremy break into the office to investigate and must flee before get answers
INT. DR. KARI’S OFFICE – NIGHT
Maia breaks in only to be startled that Dr. Jeremy is there
• Essence: raising the stakes, providing forced togetherness, gives action when they are forced to run
• Conflict: nether starts by trusting the other but they must trust to escape guards
• Subtext: attraction
• Hope/fear: we hope for answers then safety but we fear Dr. Jeremy but we fear more the guards
o Beginning: Maia breaks into the office and is startled that Dr. Jeremy is there (Intrigue)
o Middle: They join forces to search for information (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: A guard shows up so Dr. Jeremy pulls her into Dr. Kari’s lab (Suspense)

SCENE 27
INT. LAB – NIGHT
Dr. Jeremy winds them through the gory oblation (skin removal) lab to escape the guards
• Essence: establish Maia’s fear factor and the nature of some of the experiments
• Conflict: Maia pushes away as Dr. Jeremy tries to protect her but she passes out
• Subtext: what do you fear more – attraction, healing, gory research
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia survives, we fear she will again go crazy
o Beginning: The lab is full of dead skin in various levels of preparation (External Dilemma)
o Middle: Maia becomes uncontrollable and Dr. Jeremy fears discovery by the guard (External Dilemma)
o Ending: Dr. Jeremy make Maia pass out (Cliffhanger)

Scene Arc: Maia and Dr. Jeremy are going to work together and have a new plan
SCENE 28
INT. DR. JEREMY’s BED – DAY
Maia awakens in Dr. Jeremy’s room and yelps at experiment photos, Dr. Jeremy comes out of bathroom
• Essence: To see Dr. Jeremy’s tattoo and learn his backstory; to show that trust has developed between them; before Maia can share more of her backstory Dr. Kari knocks on his door and he slips out before she can see Maia
• Conflict: Maia is concerned about what happened when she passed out; Dr. Jeremy shares about his sister’s death and feels vulnerable; Dr. Kari suspects something
• Subtext: the juggling game of trust/mistrust
• Hope/fear: we are excited or this new coalition but we fear that they are ach too broken to keep it going
o Beginning: Maia comes to gory research photos on facing her as Dr. Jeremy exits bathroom half dressed and explains what she’s seeing in his research breakthrough (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Middle: Dr. Jeremy settles Maia down; they talk; she admires his tattoo which he reveals is about his sister who died at the spa (Suspense)
o Ending: Dr. Kari knocks and tries to come in (Cliffhanger)

Scene Arc: As the day progresses Dr. Kari, Dr. Jeremy, Maia each figure something out and try to communicate
SCENE 29
INT./EXT. SPA MONTAGUE – DAY
Different revelations happen as each goes through their day, Maia and Dr. Jeremy try to connect
• Essence: escalating new tensions, jealousy, what the new revelations advance plot
o Maia sees Dr. Jeremy’s tattoo on Dr. Kari’s fresh skin
o Dr. Jeremy observes the organ harvesting and selling
o We see Dr. Kari add Dr. Jeremy’s sister’s skin with tattoo
• Conflict: details exposed and everyone is on edge
• Subtext: knowledge is dangerous
• Hope/fear: we hope the new information will provide Maia’s safety but we fear the evil uncovered
o Beginning: Maia sneaks out the employee entrance and sees the organ pickup trucks and things start clicking in place (Intrigue)
o Middle: She runs back in to find Dr. Jeremy and bumps into Dr. Kari and sees the same unique tattoo (Major TWIST)
o Ending: She excuses herself to find Dr. Jeremy and they agree to meet later to escape due to his research and escaping at t quiet time (Suspense)

Scene Arc: Maia and Dr. Jeremy prep to escape but Maia is trying to find Ollie
SCENE 30
INT. COSTUME PARTY – NIGHT
Maia has some scares trying to find Ollie then convince her to leave
• Essence: they exchange information and plan escape
• Conflict: time and fear of Dr. Kari
• Subtext: what really matters when time counts
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia can find Ollie but we fear she won’t in the costume party
o Beginning: Maia looks for Ollie at a costumed event (External Dilemma)
o Middle: She finds Ollie and has trouble breaking through some weird programming (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: explains that they must leave, Ollie needs to go back for clothes (nothing under her costume) and car keys (Suspense)

SCENE 31
INT. DR. JEREMY’S LAB – NIGHT
Dr. Jeremy is trying to pack up his most valuable research
• Essence: they exchange information and plan escape
• Conflict: time and fear of Dr. Kari
• Subtext: what really matters when time counts
• Hope/fear: hope he can escape in time but fear that Dr. Kari will stop him
o Beginning: Dr. Jeremy runs into his lab and carefully gets out his research (Uncertainty)
o Middle: Dr. Kari appears and challenges him (External Dilemma)
o Ending: Dr. Kari holds Dr. Jeremy hostage and waits for Maia (Cliffhanger)

Scene Arc: Dr. Kari is in Dr. Jeremy’s lab is a showdown
SCENE 32
INT. LAB – NIGHT
Maia enters and is surprised to find Dr. Kari and an injured Dr. Jeremy
• Essence: Dr. Kari confronts Dr. Jeremy and attacks when Maia arrives
• Conflict: How much does she know/how dangerous is she
• Subtext: the devil you know
• Hope/fear: we hope we fear he and his research will be lost
o Beginning:
o Middle:
o Ending:

SCENE 34
INT. LAB – NIGHT
Dr. Kari has slashed Dr. Jeremy and he is bleeding profusely; Maia and Ollie have arrived
• Essence: Maia fights with Dr. Kari and questions her morals; engineers demise for Dr. Kari but Ollie steps in to be helpful and accidently gives Dr. Kari more power
• Conflict: a moral and physical battle
• Subtext: the devil inside vs death
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia will defeat Dr. Kari but fear that she will not win in time to help Dr. Jeremy
o Beginning: Maia and Dr. Kari are circling each other ready to fight (Suspense)
o Middle: Ollie tries to help by throwing a substance at Dr. Kari but it turns her skin a bright color but otherwise strengthens her (Mystery)
o Ending: Dr. Kari takes out Ollie and we don’t know if she is alive (Mystery)

SCENE 35
INT. LAB – NIGHT
Now everyone is in peril from Dr. Kari, Maia uses treated skin to wrap Dr. Jeremy and it immediately starts healing him
• Essence: Fight nears end but everyone is injured; Dr. Kari makes Maia a partnership offer she can’t refuse, at the last minute she figures out how and uses Dr. Jeremy’s sister’s skin’s cancerous research to kill Dr. Kari
• Conflict: besides fight with Dr. Kari, Maia is battling with herself over the offer
• Subtext: how weak we all are
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia can succeed but we fear the offer
o Beginning: Dr. Kari makes Maia a partnership offer (Major Twist)
o Middle: Maia uses slimy reanimated skin to treat Dr. Jeremy’s bleeding skin (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: Maia backs Dr. Kari into a corner and tosses one of Dr. Jeremy’s treatment trays at her – she screams and runs into a treatment chamber which makes it worse and she dies (Major Twist)

Scene Arc: Months after killing Dr. Kari, Maia has taken over the spa
SCENE 36
EXT. SPA – Day
Ollie, Dr. Jeremy, Maia discuss the spa changes as they ready to meet their new guests which include a cocky Nemesis
• Essence: Show the new directions for the spa and Dr. Jeremy’s research
• Conflict: things seem peaceful until Nemesis steps out of a car
• Subtext: are we high minded or low minded humans
• Hope/fear: We hope Maia has moved past her humiliation but we fear that she is only human
o Beginning: Dr. Jeremy proposes to Maia and she accepts (Surprise)
o Middle: In welcoming new guests Nemesis steps out of a car (Uncomfortable Moment)
o Ending: Maia discusses how it was time to put the past behind her (“Bury the hatchet”) so she invited Nemesis to the new spa (Surprise)

SCENE 37
EXT. SPA – DAY
As Maia goes to greet Nemesis, Dr. Jeremy expresses pride in his relationship with Maia and how she’s overcome her fear of gore
• Essence: Ollie gets to reveal that she met Maia at a sanitarium when they were young, after Maia’s dead body encounter and, TWIST, Maia was committed because she became dangerously obsessed with reanimating humans, killing animals, doing bloody research on her own – all her aversion to gore was conditioning to protect others from her – looks like that’s gone
• Conflict: Dr. Jeremy goes from pride in Maia to fear
• Subtext: we are all capable
• Hope/fear: we hope Maia is well adjusted but we see that she is fully capable of torture and murder for fun whereas at least Dr. Kari had a selfish goal to heal herself
o Beginning: Dr. Jeremy tells Ollie he’s so proud of Maia’s work on the spa, accepting his marriage proposal, that Maia has such a loyal friend as Ollie (Surprise)
o Middle: Ollie reveals she met Maia in clinic for criminally insane juveniles and underwent treatments in order to reenter society (Major Twist)
o Ending: That’s why the spa treatments were so challenging for her but this process has blown off the aversion therapy that kept her in check (Major Twist)

[Mary Spiers]

My vision: I am a leading creator of relatable family-friendly stories with compelling, authentic and unique characters.
What I learned: With each revision moving forward I have more breakthroughs. I went back and forth between my outlines and act structure, realizing things I had not included.

Act 1: Discovery and Departure
INT. CONCERT HALL – STAGE – NIGHT
Description: Ava performs a complex violin solo, demonstrating her technical skill but any emotional expression results in physical pain.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The storm outside is visible through large windows behind the stage, adding an ominous atmosphere as Ava begins her performance.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Ava starts to feel the physical pain as she connects emotionally, her subtle winces and slight pauses hinting at her struggle.
End: Mystery – The performance ends with Ava in visible pain, leaving the audience and viewers wondering what caused her distress, as applause fills the hall.

INT. CONCERT HALL – BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
Description: After the concert, Ava bypasses socializing with fellow musicians, opting to sit alone backstage.
Beginning: Misinterpretation – Fellow musicians invite Ava to celebrate, misinterpreting her solitude as shyness.
Middle: Internal Dilemma – Ava struggles with her desire to connect versus her need to be alone to manage her pain.
End: Suspense – Ava sits alone, staring at her violin case, as the storm intensifies outside, hinting at her inner turmoil and what might come next.

EXT. CITY STREET – NIGHT
Description: Ava walks home alone, lost in her thoughts and music, and is struck by lightning.
Beginning: Intrigue – The storm grows stronger, and Ava’s preoccupation with her thoughts and music creates an eerie tension.
Middle: Suspense – Lightning flashes around Ava, heightening the sense of impending danger.
End: Surprise – Ava is suddenly struck by lightning, dramatically altering her senses.

INT. HOSPITAL – NIGHT
Description: Ava awakens in the hospital, confused and disoriented, realizes her senses have changed and is told she has synesthesia.
Beginning: Mystery – Ava wakes up to chaotic hospital sounds, which she perceives as vivid colors, confusing her.
Middle: Internal Dilemma – Ava grapples with fear and curiosity about her new perceptions.
End: Reveal – A doctor explains her condition, revealing she has synesthesia, leaving her and the audience curious about what this means for her future.
EXT. PARK – DAY
Description: Seeking solace, Ava spends time alone in the park, researches synesthesia and decides to seek healing and find answers.
Beginning: Intrigue – Ava isolates herself in the park, experimenting with her new senses, creating a visually captivating scene.
Middle: Internal Dilemma – Ava struggles to accept her new reality, researching synesthesia and feeling torn between fear and hope.
End: Uncertainty – Ava decides to seek help at a retreat center, leaving viewers unsure about what she will discover there.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DAY
Description: Ava arrives at the wilderness retreat, meeting Diana Wildroot, and reluctantly decides to stay despite her skepticism about sound healing.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The retreat’s natural and serene setting contrasts sharply with Ava’s urban background.
Middle: Superior Position – The audience senses Diana knows more about Ava’s condition than she reveals, creating tension.
End: Uncertainty – Ava decides to stay, her guarded optimism leaving viewers curious about the retreat’s impact on her.

Act 2: Mastery and Deception
EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – VARIOUS LOCATIONS – DAY
Description: Diana teaches Ava to use her synesthetic perceptions to create visual-aural maps, creating a bond.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The lesson starts by a serene, babbling brook in the forest, making the setting visually engaging and calming.
Middle: Intrigue – Diana hints at her deep knowledge of Ava’s condition and family history, piquing Ava’s curiosity.
End: Internal Dilemma – Ava feels a mix of hope and fear as she begins to harness her new senses under Diana’s guidance, struggling with the pain that sometimes comes with it.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – MAIN HALL – DAY
Description: Eli conducts a powerful demonstration of the "Special Note," convincing the group of its healing powers, but Ava remains skeptical.
Beginning: Superior Position – The audience knows Eli’s reputation as a charismatic leader, setting high expectations for the demonstration.
Middle: Mystery – Eli’s demonstration creates a mesmerizing atmosphere, but Ava’s lack of synesthetic response raises questions.
End: Misinterpretation – The crowd is convinced of the "Special Note’s" power, while Ava’s skepticism grows, hinting at potential deception.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – WOODS – DAY
Description: Ava trains alone, trying to connect her synesthetic perceptions with the natural environment, finding both frustration and fleeting moments of harmony.
Beginning: Uncomfortable Moment – Ava struggles visibly with her synesthetic perceptions, feeling out of place in the natural setting.
Middle: Surprise – Ava has a sudden breakthrough where she briefly manages to map a sound to a color, surprising herself.
End: Cliffhanger – Just as she starts to understand her abilities, something distracts her, leaving her progress hanging in the balance.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DINING HALL – NIGHT
Description: Ava experiences a painful synesthetic overload during dinner, causing a scene that Eli uses to demonstrate her need for his guidance.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The cozy dining hall contrasts with the brewing tension within Ava, creating a layered atmosphere.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Ava’s synesthetic overload becomes unbearable, causing a scene in front of everyone.
End: Mislead/Reveal – Eli steps in, appearing to help but subtly suggesting her condition proves her need for his guidance, misleading her and the others about his true intentions.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DAY
Description: Ava takes a solitary walk, using her synesthesia to explore and connect with music and the environment in new ways. She begins to play with a color/sound symphony.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – Ava wanders through the most visually striking parts of the retreat, with nature’s beauty enhancing her synesthetic experience.
Middle: Surprise – She discovers a natural spot where the sounds and colors align perfectly, creating a spontaneous symphony.
End: Cliffhanger – Just as she’s getting lost in the beauty of her newfound abilities, she hears something unsettling in the distance, leaving her exploration interrupted.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DAY
Description: Eli has a 1:1 session with Ava, during which he tries to deepen her commitment to his teachings.
Beginning: Superior Position – Eli uses flattery to put Ava at ease, knowing she craves validation.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Ava begins to feel uneasy as Eli’s intentions become more evident, creating a tense atmosphere.
End: Mislead/Reveal – Eli’s persuasive tactics make Ava momentarily consider his offer before she experiences a painful reaction, leading her to question his motives again.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT LIBRARY – NIGHT
Description: In the retreat's library, Ava researches the elusive "Special Note," uncovering conflicting information that deepens her doubt.
Beginning: Mystery – Ava finds ancient, cryptic texts and notes about the "Special Note," setting up a puzzle for her to solve.
Middle: Intrigue – As she delves deeper, she finds inconsistencies and conflicting accounts, heightening her suspicion.
End: Surprise – Ava uncovers a key piece of information that suggests the "Special Note" might be a fabrication, leaving her with more questions.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DIANA'S OFFICE – DAY
Description: Diana reveals parts of her past with the family curse to Ava, deepening their bond but leaving some truths hidden.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – Diana’s office is filled with old artifacts and heirlooms, hinting at a rich, hidden history.
Middle: Intrigue – Diana shares personal stories that resonate deeply with Ava, but hints at larger, untold truths.
End: Cliffhanger – Diana stops short of revealing everything, leaving Ava curious and anxious to learn more about the curse.

INT. AVA'S CABIN – NIGHT
Description: In a quiet moment, Diana brews a tea that induces a vivid, symbolic dream in Ava, revealing deep subconscious insights.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The cozy, dimly lit cabin filled with herbal aromas sets a mystical mood.
Middle: Surprise – Ava’s dream is filled with vivid, symbolic imagery that provides unexpected insights.
End: Cliffhanger – Ava wakes up feeling enlightened but also confused and anxious to understand the dream’s full meaning.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – ELI'S OFFICE – NIGHT
Description: Eli subtly coerces Ava to commit to a deeper involvement in his teachings, using flattery and veiled threats.
Beginning: Superior Position – Eli’s office is imposing and filled with symbols of power, making Ava feel small.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Eli’s flattery turns to veiled threats, making Ava feel trapped and manipulated.
End: Cliffhanger – Ava reluctantly agrees to deepen her involvement, but the look on her face shows her growing fear and doubt.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DAY
Description: Ava believes she has mastered the "Special Note," but her success is shattered when she learns it was an illusion orchestrated by Eli, and Diana is missing.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – Ava performs in an idyllic, secluded part of the retreat, believing she has found the "Special Note."
Middle: Major Twist – Ava overhears a suspicious conversation revealing Eli’s deception.
End: Cliffhanger – Realizing the truth about Eli’s manipulation, Ava discovers Diana is missing, leaving her feeling betrayed and alone.

Act 3: Descent and Redetermination
EXT. WOODS – DAY
Description: Using her refined synesthetic abilities, Ava follows a colorful trail through the woods, discovering important clues about Diana's whereabouts.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – Ava starts in a dense, misty part of the woods, where the colors she perceives seem to blend into the environment, creating a surreal atmosphere.
Middle: Suspense – As Ava follows the colorful trail, she hears eerie sounds and sees fleeting shadows, heightening the tension and her sense of urgency.
End: Reveal – Ava finds a significant clue left by Diana, such as a personal item or a symbolic marking, providing a sense of hope and direction.

EXT. WOODS – DAY
Description: Ava attempts to use her synesthesia to confront Eli in the woods, but her plan fails, forcing her to retreat and rethink her strategy.
Beginning: Superior Position – Ava believes she has the upper hand with her abilities, creating a sense of confidence as she approaches Eli.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Ava's synesthetic abilities start to falter under Eli's manipulative defenses, making her feel vulnerable and exposed.
End: Cliffhanger – Ava is forced to retreat, realizing she underestimated Eli, leaving her and the audience in suspense about her next move.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – SECRET ROOM – NIGHT
Description: Ava discovers a hidden room filled with old artifacts and documents that reveal the origins and nature of the family curse.
Beginning: Mystery – Ava stumbles upon the entrance to the hidden room, shrouded in shadows and secrecy.
Middle: Intrigue – Inside, Ava finds ancient artifacts and cryptic documents that gradually reveal the curse’s origins.
End: Reveal – Ava uncovers a pivotal piece of information about the curse, leaving her both enlightened and burdened by the new knowledge.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – FOREST – NIGHT
Description: In a tense meeting in the forest, Ava and Diana strategize their next move against Eli, ultimately reconciling and strengthening their bond.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The meeting takes place in a secluded, moonlit clearing, adding a mystical atmosphere.
Middle: Intrigue – As they discuss their strategy, Diana reveals deeper insights into their family history and Eli’s tactics, adding layers to the conversation.
End: Cliffhanger – Their plan is set, but the scene ends with an unsettling sound or movement in the forest, suggesting they are not alone.

EXT. WOODS – NIGHT
Description: During a heartfelt conversation, Diana reveals her true identity to Ava, fostering a deeper familial bond and understanding.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – They sit by a small, glowing campfire in the middle of the woods, creating an intimate and reflective setting.
Middle: Surprise – Diana reveals her true identity as Ava’s grandmother, shocking Ava and deepening the emotional stakes.
End: Intrigue – The revelation reshapes Ava’s understanding of her past, leaving her with mixed emotions and a stronger bond with Diana.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT MAIN HALL – NIGHT
Description: Ava integrates her wilderness skills with her synesthetic abilities, devising a plan to confront Eli and expose the “Special Note” as a fraud.

Beginning: Superior Position – Ava meticulously prepares her tools and strategies, showcasing her newfound confidence and readiness.
Middle: Suspense – As she finalizes her preparations, Ava reflects on her journey and the stakes, heightening the tension.
End: Cliffhanger – Ava steps out of the hall, ready to confront Eli, leaving the audience anticipating the showdown.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – HEALING ROOM – NIGHT
Description: Ava and Diana perform an intense ritual that temporarily suppresses the curse, giving Ava hope.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The healing room is filled with ancient symbols, candles, and herbs, creating a sacred and intense atmosphere.
Middle: Suspense – The ritual is physically and emotionally taxing, with moments where it seems like they might fail.
End: Reveal – The curse is temporarily suppressed, giving Ava a moment of relief and hope, but the temporary nature leaves a lingering tension.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – FOREST – NIGHT
Description: During a severe storm, Ava navigates through the forest, overwhelmed by the violent clash of lightning and the synesthetic chaos it causes.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The forest is bathed in the eerie light of the storm, with lightning illuminating the trees in a haunting way.
Middle: Suspense – Ava’s synesthetic perceptions turn the storm into a terrifying sensory overload, with colors and sounds clashing violently.
End: Cliffhanger – Ava collapses, utterly debilitated by the storm’s onslaught, leaving her fate uncertain and the audience on edge.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – FOREST – NIGHT
Description: Eli exploits Ava’s vulnerable state to deepen her doubts about breaking the curse.
Beginning: Superior Position – The audience knows Eli’s manipulative nature, creating tension as Ava confronts him.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Eli skillfully manipulates Ava’s doubts, making her feel increasingly vulnerable.
End: Cliffhanger – Eli’s words leave Ava questioning her ability to break the curse, increasing her internal conflict.

Act 4: Climax and Resolution
EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – SACRED GROUNDS – NIGHT
Description: During the peak of the celestial event, Ava performs a powerful symphonic piece that visually and sonically interacts with the environment, breaking the curse.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The celestial event creates an otherworldly backdrop as Ava begins her performance.
Middle: Suspense – Ava’s music and visuals intensify, with the audience unsure if she will succeed in breaking the curse.
End: Triumphant Relief – The curse is broken as Ava reaches the climax of her symphony, and she realizes her full potential, leaving her and the audience in a state of triumphant relief.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – CLEARING – DAY
Description: Ava faces Eli Sanden in a climactic showdown, utilizing her synesthetic abilities and her connection to the wilderness.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The clearing is filled with natural beauty, contrasting with the intensity of the upcoming showdown.
Middle: Suspense – Ava’s abilities and Sanden’s manipulations clash in a dramatic battle, with the outcome hanging in the balance.
End: Triumphant Relief – Ava gains the upper hand and defeats Sanden, solidifying her mastery and connection to the wilderness.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – HEALING ROOM – NIGHT
Description: After defeating Sanden, Ava and Diana perform a ritual that reveals the true origins of the curse, leading to a profound revelation and healing.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – The healing room is filled with ancient symbols and artifacts, creating a sacred atmosphere.
Middle: Intrigue – Diana reveals her role in the curse, providing deep insights and shocking revelations.
End: Triumphant Relief – The ritual lifts the curse, leading to an emotional and healing resolution for Ava and Diana.

EXT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DAY
Description: As the new guardian, Ava takes charge of the retreat, facing her responsibilities with newfound confidence and a sense of purpose.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – Ava stands in a serene part of the retreat, ready to begin her new role.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment – Ava faces initial challenges and doubts, testing her leadership skills.
End: Triumphant Relief – Ava embraces her responsibilities with confidence, symbolizing her growth and readiness for the future.

INT. WILDERNESS RETREAT – DAY
Description: In a reflective moment, Ava contemplates her journey from isolation to empowerment, looking forward with hope and determination.
Beginning: More Interesting Setting – Ava sits in a peaceful, sunlit room filled with mementos from her journey, creating a reflective atmosphere.
Middle: Intrigue – Ava reflects on pivotal moments and lessons learned, deepening the audience’s connection to her journey.
End: Triumphant Relief – Ava feels a sense of peace and purpose, looking forward to the future with determination and hope.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  Mary Spiers.

[James Hernandez]

James’ Fascinating Scene Outlines!

My Vision: I am a great writer who is recognized by the industry as an exceptional collaborator able to elevate any project into production and have maximum success.

What I learned from doing this assignment is…I have some scenes that are very interesting and some that are borderline boring with not much going on. Yet this process of applying interest techniques to scenes is a great tool to not only finding less than exciting scenes, but to elevate all of them. Also, apparently ChatGPT wants me to get the paid version because the prompt’s answer for the assignment was the same one I provided the AI.

Act 1:
1. INT. OFFICE RECREATION ROOM – NIGHT
Ethan uneasily waits for his New Year’s date who never shows up.
Scene Arc: Ethan’s expectations go from hopeful to disappointment.
Essence: To show Ethan’s unsuccessful adventures with women.
Conflict: Ethan ignores the snarky commentary from his coworkers.
Subtext: Ethan hides his grief though being polite.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan’s date arrives and fear that he’ll be stood up.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ethan constantly looks around and checks his watch apparently waiting for someone.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ethan watches an elderly coworker in a serious make out session with his date. Other coworkers shoot snarky remarks at Ethan pointing to the more successful elderly workmate.
Ending: (Betrayal) Ethan calls his supposed date and finds her having sex with someone else.

2. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – DAY
Ethan’s close friend, Albert, visits and suggests an online dating site for renewed hope.
Scene Arc: Ethan goes from doubtful to consideration for the online dating suggestion.
Essence: To show Ethan still has the willingness to try out modern dating methods.
Conflict: Ethan shuns Albert’s ideas on finding love.
Subtext: Ethan knows he’s growing older and covers this concern with his wit.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan’s open to new dating methods and fear he’ll never find anyone.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Albert lays it out for Ethan that he’s getting older and must adapt with the times or lose out on love.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Ethan incorrectly believes Albert is referring to his sexual organ not his dismal dateless streak.
Ending: (Surprise) Ethan shocks Albert by declaring he’ll complete online dating profiles this same night.

3. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Ethan signs up with a membership to an online dating site.
Scene Arc: Ethan goes from unenthusiastic to excited about the online possibilities.
Essence: To show there may be love for Ethan in the future.
Conflict: Ethan goes through internal mental anguish as he searches online.
Subtext: Ethan laughs at his present single status covering his loneliness.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan finds love and fear he may be wasting his time.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ethan surfs the online dating sites and is appalled at the bizarre imagery.
Middle: (Uncertainty) At times it looks like Ethan has found a decent website, but is quickly disillusioned by more strange graphics.
Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) It appears as though Ethan is going to give up on his quest and at the last moment fills out a website profile.

4. INT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY
Ethan gets several requests to meet from an interesting array of women.
Scene Arc: Ethan goes from a casual evening to being overwhelmed by women propositions.
Essence: To show Ethan has many decisions to make with regards to his love life.
Conflict: Feeling overwhelmed, Ethan politely dismisses the women suitors.
Subtext: Ethan hides his insecurity through witty messages.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan will choose one of the women and fear he’ll ruin his chances at love.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Ethan doesn’t know which woman to choose as there are dozens of love requests.
Middle: (Suspense) Ethan peruses all the requests and we wait for his decision.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ethan makes a decision but we don’t know what it is.

5. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Ethan meets his tech genius, Joey, and they embark on the dating adventures of a lifetime.
Scene Arc: Ethan goes from having his reservations to accepting Joey’s ideas for his profile.
Essence: To show Ethan and Joey’s differences leading to a bonding moment.
Conflict: Ethan and Joey spar about how best to approach women.
Subtext: Ethan and Joey divulge very little about their pasts through evasion.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan is successful and fear his attitude will leave him single.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ethan and Joey intentionally avoid discussing their pasts with one another.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Ethan and Joey go back and forth on how to best portray his persona online.
Ending: (Character changes radically) Ethan in a surprise move accepts Joey’s recommendations for his online profiles.

6. MONTAGE OF SHORT DATING SCENES
Comedy: Ethan goes on multiple dates and meets women who are eccentric and some who are downright bizarre. Character action: Ethan offers awkward complements to hide his disillusionment with the dates. He offers chuckles as the women describe themselves.

7. INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Ethan meets Lily and subtle sparks fly as they appear to hide an aspect of their lives.
Scene Arc: From awkwardness to mutual fun.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily can have a future.
Conflict: Lily doesn’t want to talk about her childhood.
Subtext: They politely hide aspects of their lives.
Hope/fear: We fear they may not be compatible and hope there is a chance.
Beginning: (Mystery) Ethan and Lily don’t know each other and come across as withholding aspects of their lives.
Middle: (Suspense) We wonder if Ethan and Lily will connect on this first meeting.
Ending: (Surprise) Before they depart for the evening, Lily surprises Ethan with a detail from his life which leaves him pondering.

8. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – LATER
Lily takes out a letter left by Ethan and reads it again.
Scene Arc: From a mysterious Lily to a thoughtful woman.
Essence: To show that Lily has known about Ethan.
Conflict: Does not let Ethan know the truth about her.
Subtext: What is Lily keeping secret?
Hope/fear: We fear Lily may never see Ethan again and hope they reunite at some point.
Beginning: (Superior Position) We now know that Lily has known about Ethan but he’s unaware of this.
Middle: (Intrigue) How and when did Lily gain possession of Ethan’s letter?
Ending: (Cliffhanger) How will Lily proceed with Ethan’s relationship?

9. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – DAY
Ethan feels most of his dates were unsuccessful but believes he may have a future with Lily.
Scene Arc: From Ethan feeling like a failure to believing in a relationship with Lily.
Essence: To show Ethan made a connection with Lily.
Conflict: Ethan and Joey spar over her work which he deems as unsuccessful.
Subtext: Ethan doesn’t want Joey to know how much he wants to follow up with Lily.
Hope/fear: We fear Ethan will remain single and hope Lily can stay in his life.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Ethan has to decide to either follow up with Lily or keep going on more dates.
Middle: (Uncertainty) It appears Ethan may not follow up with anyone leaving us hoping and fearing. (Misinterpretation) Joey believes his dilemma may stem from him being possibly gay.
Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) We also believe Ethan may be gay but he declares another meeting with Lily.

10. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Lily invites Ethan to her home and proposes a creative competition.
Scene Arc: From Lily’s dubious intent to her wanting to get closer to Ethan.
Essence: To show Lily wants to get closer to Ethan.
Conflict: Ethan questions how Lily knows about him but she doesn’t reveal anything.
Subtext: Lily covertly wants to know Ethan’s authenticity.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Lily make a connection and fear his suspicion will ruin them.
Beginning: (Intrigue) How does Lily know so much about Ethan?
Middle: (Uncertainty) It appears Ethan and Lily will not make a connection.
Ending: (Major twist) Lily stuns Ethan by inviting him to her apartment.

11. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – DAY
Lily shows Ethan her art studio with many works in progress.
Scene Arc: From Ethan’s suspicions to a connection being made with Lily.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily can have a relationship.
Conflict: Ethan expresses his suspicions as Lily remains mum.
Subtext: Lily is slowing bringing Ethan into her life.
Hope/fear: We hope a relationship can flourish and fear suspicions will derail Ethan and Lily.
Beginning: (Mystery) How did a knowledgeable Lily enter Ethan’s life?
Middle: (Superior Position) We know that Lily is possibly testing Ethan’s authenticity.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) It appears that Ethan and Lily are going to kiss, but at the last moment they freeze.

Act 2:
12. EXT. PARK – DAY
Ethan meets with Joey to have his profile suspended as he wants to pursue Lily only.
Scene Arc: From Ethan weighing his dating options to choosing Lily.
Essence: To show how optimistic Ethan is about Lily.
Conflict: Ethan and Joey spar about keeping her as a love assistant.
Subtext: Joey wants to stay close to Ethan thus her insistence.
Hope/fear: We fear Ethan and Joey will stop working together and hope he’s successful.
Beginning: (External Dilemma) Ethan realizes whatever choice he makes about love could bring pain to his life.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Joey incorrectly views Ethan as indecisive and perceives an opportunity.
Ending: (Character changes radically) Joey declares herself as Ethan’s love assistant, which keeps him close to her as he plans to pursue Lily.

13. INT. JOEY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Joey finds out that her children’s father who’s on trial may not be acquitted from felony charges.
Scene Arc: From Joey having a pleasant evening to finding out pessimistic news.
Essence: To show Joey’s dire life/family situation.
Conflict: Joey battles with her mother in law over the future of the family.
Subtext: Joey evades questions on how she will provide for the family.
Hope/fear: We hope Joey can save her family and fear she will fall on desperate times.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Joey weighs whether to maintain a relationship with the felon who is the father of her children or find someone new.
Middle: (Major twist) Joey will use Ethan in his quest for love to make him hers.
Ending: (Superior Position) We know that Joey has a scheme to win over Ethan and have him to hopefully be the father figure for her kids.

14. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – DAY
Joey begins to swoon Ethan to ingratiate herself in his life.
Scene Arc: From Ethan and Joey being work cohorts to reliable friends.
Essence: To show Joey immersing herself into Ethan’s life.
Conflict: Ethan wants her as a work partner but Joey wants friendship.
Subtext: Joey hides her ulterior motive from Ethan.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Joey can get along and fear they will end their partnership.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Joey dresses and combs Ethan’s hair making him look spiffy for Lily and herself.
Middle: (Suspense) Will Joey’s underhanded actions work in bringing Ethan and her closer?
Ending: (Surprise) Joey gives Ethan a makeover. (Character changes radically) Joey becomes Ethan’s reliable friend.

15. INT. COFFEE SHOP – NIGHT
Lily writes letters to Ethan mirroring his form of communication and deepening their connection.
Scene Arc: From Lily’s consternation to her love seeking plan.
Essence: To show Lily wants to get serious with Ethan.
Conflict: Lily’s mental debate forces her to evaluate her life.
Subtext: Ethan is unaware of Lily’s plan.
Hope/fear: We hope Lily is successful with her plan and fear she may not connect with Ethan.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Lily debates whether to write Ethan a letter knowing he may never be the love of her life.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Lily’s friend incorrectly believes Ethan is a psychologist who is looking for love.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Lily embarks on her own love search. How will it turn out?

16. EXT. PARK – DAY
Joey expresses deep feelings for Ethan causing the potential for a love triangle.
Scene Arc: From Ethan and Joey being friends to a deeper relationship.
Essence: To show Ethan and Joey’s relationship deepening.
Conflict: Ethan wants Joey as a friend but she wants more of him.
Subtext: Joey’s ulterior motive is in motion with Ethan unaware.
Hope/fear: We fear Ethan may push Joey away and hope they stay friends.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Joey charms Ethan who becomes enamored by her advances.
Middle: (Uncertainty) We don’t know if Joey’s advances will be successful.
Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) It appears Ethan is losing interest, but at the last moment locks eyes with the loving Joey.

17. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Ethan finds himself between the attraction of two women expressed to Albert.
Scene Arc: From Ethan having hope for a love life to the realization of a difficult predicament.
Essence: To show the bind Ethan is in with two women.
Conflict: Albert wants Ethan to just choose but he doesn’t know who to choose.
Subtext: Ethan has feelings for both women covered by his wit.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan makes the right decision and fear he will hurt one of the women.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Ethan has two women he has recently grown close to.
Middle: (More Interesting Setting) Ethan is with Albert having this discussion in a card shop.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Ethan realizes he’s in a predicament. What will he decide?

18. INT. JOEY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Joey sets a plan into motion to make Ethan hers.
Scene Arc: From a casual conversation to a woman on a mission.
Essence: To show the degree Joey will go through to make Ethan hers.
Conflict: Joey spars with her mother in law over leaving Ethan alone.
Subtext: Joey hides her mission from Ethan.
Hope/fear: We hope there’s an appropriate resolution and fear someone will get hurt.
Beginning: (Superior Position) We know that Ethan is the target of a woman in dire straits and he’s totally in the dark.
Middle: (Character changes radically) Joey becomes more obsessed with Ethan.
Ending: (Major twist) Joey declares her plan to make Ethan her lover and future father of her children.

19. EXT. MUSEUM – DAY
Ethan goes on an all-day date with Lily who correctly “guesses” many details of his life.
Scene Arc: From a friendly date to a deepened relationship.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily make a good couple.
Conflict: Ethan spars with Lily as to how she knows so much about him.
Subtext: Lily’s plan to test Ethan’s authenticity is underway.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Lily further their relationship and fear her plan may backfire.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Lily is testing Ethan’s persona through what she knows about him.
Middle: (Suspense) We wonder how Lily’s test on Ethan will pan out.
Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) It appears Ethan and Lily will part ways, but at the last moment have their first kiss.

20. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Ethan and Lily exchange letters as they both stay reserved about their pasts.
Scene Arc: From a casual evening to a bonding moment with the exchange of letters.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily have a good chance of ending up together.
Conflict: Ethan and Lily avoid chatting about their pasts.
Subtext: Ethan and Lily avoid their pasts diplomatically.
Hope/fear: We fear the lack of communication will stifle them and hope they will open up.
Beginning: (Suspense) We wonder if Ethan and Lily will exchange letters.
Middle: (Uncertainty) We hope Ethan and Lily will share their letters but it appears unlikely.
Ending: (Surprise) Lily at the last moment whips out the letter followed by Ethan taking out his letter. They engage in a heated make out session.

21. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – DAY
Lily is confronted by her ex Max but tells him to get lost as she chooses Ethan.
Scene Arc: From Lily being put on the spot to her choosing Ethan.
Essence: To show the affection Lily has for Ethan.
Conflict: Lily and Max spar over their nonexistent relationship.
Subtext: Lily hides her deep connection with Ethan from Max.
Hope/fear: We hope Lily finds true love in Ethan and fear Max may make her life impossible.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Lily must decide between Ethan and Max for her well-being.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Max shows Lily compromising photos of them both.
Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) It appears Lily is going to give in to Max, but shocks us by sending him away.

22. INT. MAX’S DEN – NIGHT
Max, a troll, launches a smear campaign against Ethan.
Scene Arc: From Max surfing the internet to him trolling Ethan.
Essence: To show Max will not give up on Lily.
Conflict: Max expresses his disdain for Ethan.
Subtext: Max targets Ethan anonymously.
Hope/fear: We hope Max is unsuccessful and fear Ethan’s relationship with Lily will get ruined.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Max looks at the sites where Ethan’s profiles live.
Middle: (Character changes radically) Max becomes determined to hold on to Lily at any cost.
Ending: (Major twist) Max declares a smear campaign against Ethan.

23. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Lily catches Joey on top of Ethan in a heated moment.
Scene Arc: From a mild conversation to an intense position for three people.
Essence: To show the passionate triangle among Ethan, Joey, and Lily.
Conflict: Ethan faces scrutiny simultaneously from two women.
Subtext: Ethan uses wit to diffuse the situation.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan can resolve the situation and fear he will lose both women.
Beginning: (Suspense) Joey gradually seduces Ethan who’s hesitant to give in.
Middle: (Surprise) Ethan gives in and Lily catches him and Joey in a heated compromising position. (Major Twist) Ethan, Lily and Joey now face new consequences in their relationships.
Ending: (External Dilemma) Ethan has to diffuse the situation and make critical decisions with regards to his love life.

Act 3:
24. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – DAY
Ethan confronts Lily regarding their relationship as numerous revelations come out.
Scene Arc: From an argument to a mutual understanding.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily’s pasts are similar.
Conflict: Ethan and Lily spar as to who has been more transparent.
Subtext: Ethan and Lily hide their deep-seated affection from one another.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Lily reach an understanding and fear their relationship is over.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Ethan and Lily must decide if they will keep pursuing each other after the compromising situation the prior night.
Middle: (Uncertainty) We are not sure if peace will be achieved given the revelations that come out.
Ending: (Surprise) The revelations have Ethan and Lily realize they have common histories.

25. EXT. ETHAN’S BUILDING – NIGHT
Max reveals himself as the mastermind behind Ethan's new viral profile.
Scene Arc: From a confrontation to threats being made.
Essence: To show Max’s determination to ruin Ethan’s chances with Lily.
Conflict: Ethan and Max argue over Lily’s heart.
Subtext: Ethan and Max hide their animosity through restraint.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Max can work things out and fear a physical confrontation.
Beginning: (Suspense) We believe there’s an imminent fight about to occur.
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Max reveals he’s the mastermind behind Ethan’s chaos.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) We are left wondering how things will play out.

26. MONTAGE OF WOMEN PURSUING ETHAN
Comedy: Numerous women continue to pursue Ethan as he’s an online sensation. Character action: Ethan messages back the overexuberant women attempting to letting them down easy.

27. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – DAY
Ethan doesn’t know how to handle the constant influx of women in his life.
Scene Arc: From Ethan’s confusion to a temporary fix for his women influx problem.
Essence: To show the constant influx of women into Ethan’s life.
Conflict: Ethan and Albert spar over how to handle the pursuing women.
Subtext: Ethan’s sanity is tested although he appears cheerful.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan resolves his situation and fear he will wind up alone.
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) The women chasing Ethan believe he’s the biggest stud on the internet.
Middle: (External Dilemma) How will Ethan fix his persona problem without hurting the women chasing him?
Ending: (Character changes radically) Albert volunteers to handle the influx of women acting as a surrogate.

28. INT. LILY’S ART STUDIO – NIGHT
Lily faces her dilemma though her art.
Scene Arc: From a confused Lily to resolute decision.
Essence: To show Lily’s challenging dilemma.
Conflict: Lily battles her own thoughts.
Subtext: Lily handles her problems through her art.
Hope/fear: We hope Lily can find love with Ethan and fear their relationship can’t be mended.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Lily has not fully forgiven Ethan and uses her art to cope.
Middle: (Uncertainty) We are unsure what Lily will decide.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) Lily takes out many letters some of which may have been written by Ethan and leaves us wondering what she plans on doing.

29. EXT. MUSEUM – DAY
Lily spends the day evaluating her life with Ethan at the spot where they shared a moment.
Scene Arc: From Lily’s loneliness to her feeling hopeful.
Essence: To show Lily truly wants to be in Ethan’s life.
Conflict: Lily continues to battle her conscience.
Subtext: Lily hides her turmoil through an appeasing smile.
Hope/fear: We hope Lily will find love and fear she may distance Ethan.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Lily continues to struggle with her heart and wants to make the best decision.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Lily watches as a couple squeezes each other’s ass making her long for affection.
Ending: (Surprise) This moment gives Lily a sudden idea.

30. INT. COFFEE SHOP – NIGHT
Ethan writes Lily a letter from the heart to salvage things.
Scene Arc: From Ethan’s uncertainty to realizing Lily was meant for him.
Essence: To show Ethan’s quest to win over Lily.
Conflict: Ethan’s mental and internal battle.
Subtext: Ethan covers his despair through his letter writing.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan will win Lily’s heart and fear he has lost her.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Max observes Ethan from a distance.
Middle: (Suspense) Will Ethan figure out the one haunting his life is Max?
Ending: (Surprise) Ethan always knew Max was following and catches him.

31. INT. JOEY’S APARTMENT – DAY
Joey continues to pursue Ethan as her children father’s trial nears the end.
Scene Arc: From Joey’s uncertainty about her family to being locked into pursuing Ethan.
Essence: To show the dire dilemma she faces.
Conflict: Joey dismisses her mother in law’s advice.
Subtext: Joey has grown enamored by Ethan even though she schemes against him.
Hope/fear: We hope Joey’s husband is declared not guilty and fear he’ll be found guilty.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Joey’s husband’s trial is nearing the end but there’s no indication he’ll be declared not guilty.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Joey must decide between accepting her husband’s fate or pursue the recent romance with Ethan. Both could result in heartbreak.
Ending: (Intrigue) Joey indicates she will keep Ethan in her sights.

32. EXT. STREET – NIGHT
Ethan follows Max’s moves like an undercover detective trying to get filth.
Scene Arc: From following Max to finding out he is a transvestite.
Essence: To show how Ethan will expose Max to the world.
Conflict: Ethan follows Max runs into his underground crowd.
Subtext: In disguise, Ethan follows Max covertly.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan’s new found dirt on Max works and fear it will not be enough.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ethan follows Max to an underground club.
Middle: (Suspense) We know something of consequence will be discovered.
Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ethan finds himself surrounded by drag queens including Max.

33. INT. LILY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Lily breaks away from Ethan due to his supposed new online sexually charged persona.
Scene Arc: From Lily feeling hopeful to witnessing Ethan’s online sexually charged persona.
Essence: To show Lily was willing to give Ethan another chance.
Conflict: Lily is disappointed at Ethan’s online persona.
Subtext: Ethan is unaware about Lily’s surveillance of him.
Hope/fear: We hope Lily can reunite with Ethan and fear his online persona nixed that notion.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Lily finds Ethan in an adult website and gets soured by the images she sees.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Lily incorrectly believes Ethan was the one who put his unflattering images on the website.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) How will Lily respond after witnessing Ethan’s online images?

34. INT. OFFICE – DAY
Ethan has trouble concentrating at work deliberating decisions with Albert.
Scene Arc: From Ethan having trouble concentrating to realizing he has to expose Max.
Essence: To show Ethan will fight for Lily.
Conflict: Ethan spars with Albert over letting go of Lily suggesting she’s not worth the effort.
Subtext: Ethan diplomatically hides the love he feels for Lily.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan wins Lily’s heart and fear his plan will fail.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ethan believes saving his relationship with Lily can be achieved by exposing Max’s nighttime rendezvous.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Albert incorrectly believes Ethan has a desire to dress in drag to expose Max.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) How will Ethan proceed on his quest to save his relationship?

35. INT. ART GALLERY – NIGHT
Ethan appears at Lily’s art show and attempts a public apology.
Scene Arc: From Ethan’s trepidation to courage declaring his love.
Essence: To show how far Ethan will go to demonstrate his sincerity.
Conflict: Ethan has to maneuver his way into the art show.
Subtext: Ethan makes sure Lily doesn’t see him as prowls throughout the venue.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan’s successful and fear he may look like a fool.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ethan prowls throughout the venue trying to stay hidden from view.
Middle: (Suspense) We know Ethan will experience something of consequence.
Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Ethan awkwardly declares his public apology making Lily want to get away.

36. INT. JOEY’S APARTMENT – DAY
Joey is torn between her own feelings for Ethan and helping him reconcile with Lily.
Scene Arc: From Joey feeling torn to having her become decisive.
Essence: To show Joey’s immense mental anguish.
Conflict: Joey has to ease her thoughts and act rationally.
Subtext: Ethan is still in the dark with Joey’s scheme.
Hope/fear: We hope she helps Ethan and fear he’s already doomed.
Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) After witnessing Ethan’s attempt at apologizing, Joey is more convinced she needs to help him.
Middle: (Character changes radically) Joey abandons her scheme and wholeheartedly supports Ethan.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) How will Joey’s help play out with Ethan?

Act 4:
37. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Joey informs Ethan, she will help him confront Max.
Scene Arc: From Ethan in despair to having a chance with Lily with Joey’s help.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily will be a team.
Conflict: At first, Ethan doesn’t want Lily’s help but relents.
Subtext: Ethan has feelings for Joey even though his heart is with Lily.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Lily are successful but fear their humiliation.
Beginning: (External Dilemma) Ethan ponders whether to attack Max or not.
Middle: (Major twist) Joey will help Ethan fight Max as a new set of consequences will emerge.
Ending: (Suspense) We wonder how successful Ethan and Joey will be against Max.

38. EXT. STREET – DAY
Ethan confronts and humiliates Max on a public event.
Scene Arc: From Ethan being undercover to Max’s public humiliation.
Essence: To show Max’s humiliation to the world and Lily.
Conflict: Max evades trying not to be outed by Ethan.
Subtext: Ethan prowls undercover to trap Max.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan is successful and fear Max may get away.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Ethan tails Max and sets him up for humiliation.
Middle: (Suspense) Ethan and Joey wait for Max to appear in drag having him believe he’s there to meet up with a transvestite.
Ending: (Surprise) Max’s humiliation is screened through a portal for millions to witness.

39. INT. ETHAN’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Ethan deletes all his social media accounts with the press of a few buttons in front of Lily.
Scene Arc: From Lily in doubt to Ethan continual proof he cares for her.
Essence: To show Ethan’s devotion for Lily.
Conflict: Ethan and Lily spar with lingering apprehension.
Subtext: Ethan holds in his desire for a brief moment.
Hope/fear: We hope Lily will accept Ethan’s gesture and fear she will not.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) We are not sure if Lily will accept Ethan’s reconciliations gestures.
Middle: (Suspense) Lily’s decision holds us in doubt as Ethan deletes his online accounts.
Ending: (Character changes radically) Lily grabs Ethan’s face and plants a huge kiss on him.

40. EXT. AIRPORT – DAY
Joey reunites with the father of her children given he’s found not guilty.
Scene Arc: From dysfunction to a united family for Joey.
Essence: To show Joey’s love for the father of her children.
Conflict: Joey disregards his criminal record.
Subtext: Joey and her husband avoid the talking about the trial.
Hope/fear: We hope Joey’s family will stay united and fear any future crimes.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) We don’t know if Joey will accept her husband again.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Joey debates whether she should accept her husband again even though he was found not guilty.
Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) We believe Joey and her husband will never reconcile but at the last moment they embrace for the sake of their kids.

41. INT. LILY’S ART STUDIO – DAY
Lily symbolically gives Ethan a key to her studio.
Scene Arc: From some apprehension to symbolic love.
Essence: To show Lily’s strong feelings for Ethan.
Conflict: Ethan is at first surprised by the gesture.
Subtext: Both Ethan and Lily’s true desires stay suppressed for a few moments.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Lily have found love and fear any relational threats.
Beginning: (Surprise) Lily gives Ethan the key to her studio which jolts him in a good way.
Middle: (Major twist) Ethan and Lily are essentially a couple now.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) How will Valentine’s Day be for Ethan? Has his goal been reached?

42. EXT. LOVE LOCATION – NIGHT
Ethan and Lily embark on a genuine relationship.
Scene Arc: From deep feelings to love.
Essence: To show Ethan and Lily’s love for one another.
Conflict: Ethan and Lily battle over who will kiss who first.
Subtext: Ethan and Lily start their love story where Ethan wrote his first letter.
Hope/fear: We hope Ethan and Lily have true love and minimally fear any difficulties.
Beginning: (Mystery) Where are Ethan and Lily spending their Valentine’s night?
Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) We find out Ethan and Lily have returned to the site where Lily first picked up Ethan’s letter.
Ending: (Intrigue) We are left speculating on Ethan and Lily’s future in a positive way.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by  James Hernandez.

[Kristin Donnan]

Kristin’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!

VISION: “I envision writing so well and consistently that I’m in demand, cherry-picking projects, selling beyond my wildest dreams, collaborating with people I admire and truly care about, and speaking my soul—on a big scale—so that I enjoy professional freedom, financial freedom, and joy.”

WHAT I LEARNED FROM DOING THIS ASSIGNMENT: Transforming this list of information into a scene-based format is so interesting. This is where a tiny bit of “the vision” gets to take shape. One of my favorite parts!

Genre: Black comedy

Act 1:

1. EXT. RANCH CORRALS – DAY
Rex, mid-50s, blue-collar, relatively short-statured, is bottling two baby calves on their shared family ranch. He and his brother Chase—who is much larger than Rex—has clearly been working all night calving. While Chase puts away his gear, they discuss the process of probate following mom’s death. Chase is about to leave for the day—when their charismatic brother Zeke blusters in. Zeke, 6’6” and 300, seems off balance somehow, and it’s clear that he hasn’t visited—or helped—for a long time.

Beginning: Balance of a usual working day
Middle: (Uncomfortable moment) Zeke arrives—as usual, bringing chaos with him
End: The dynamic of a large family is at play: we wait and see what is next

2. EXT. RANCH OUT-BUILDINGS – DAY
Zeke awkwardly reveals that he has some claims against the family estate—and the paperwork he has proves that this is how their dad wanted it. Rex tells Zeke if he’s going to come around, then he surely is going to pitch in and not cause trouble. He’s going to help “bag and tag”—and Rex tosses him the field kit. Zeke doesn’t want to go, but obeys.

Beginning: Zeke gathers courage to make his first play
Middle: (betrayal) His play goes against the family code of honor
End: Rex shuts him down, reminds him of what’s important, and takes charge

3. EXT. PASTURE – DAY
As the men pick up new calves, toss them on the flatbed (avoiding concerned and dangerous mothers), they automatically go through the process of vaccination, castration, tagging, and recording numbers on a chart. Suddenly, the ranch dog notices something—over there, where a trail crosses the property, a woman has fallen from a bridge into the creek. Rex hurries over and hops out to help: is she okay?

Beginning: Zeke unhappily contributes; he’s not great at it.
Middle: Work as usual
End: (suspense / major twist) They find a person!

4. EXT. PASTURE – UNDER BRIDGE – SAME
She is NOT okay. She is dead. Rex maneuvers around the body, which is facing away from the pickup…until he can see her face. He then looks squarely at Zeke, who does not look very okay either. Rex simply says the woman’s name. Zeke says nothing. Rex tells him to get the hell out.

Beginning: (intrigue) Investigating the situation / dreading the worst
Middle: (intrigue / uncomfortable moment / major twist) Rex knows that Zeke knows her
End: (suspense / intrigue) Is Rex kicking him out, or telling Zeke to “run”?

Act 2: Investigations

5. EXT. PASTURE / BRIDGE – DAY
Several cops have cordoned off the trail; cops and coroner examine scene. Rex stands out of the way down below, shouting back and forth to the sheriff, who is up on the bridge; cows and dog look on. Rex readily offers up that the whole family knows the dead woman, and that she was working “against them” at the county offices regarding some property issues. The sheriff asks, “Wasn’t Zeke seeing her?” Rex says he knows nothing about that.

Beginning: (mystery) investigation of the situation.
Middle: (intrigue / twist) Rex admits that the dead woman was working against the family.
End: (intrigue / reveal) Rex does NOT admit knowing about Zeke and the woman.

6. INT. MAIN RANCH HOUSE – NIGHT
Rex is exhausted, eating leftovers from a Tupperware, and standing in the doorway to his parents’ office. It’s obviously exactly as they left it. He reluctantly enters and starts opening drawers, looking through files. Eventually, hours later, he finds something that stops him in his tracks.

Beginning: Rex doesn’t want to face the inevitable.
Middle: He dives into the files.
End: (intrigue / suspense) He finds something.

7. INT. REX’S QUARTERS – EARLY MORNING
In the walkout basement / manager’s apartment of the ranch house, Rex is asleep in his clothes on the couch under a Mexican blanket. Both he and his dog are startled awake by an urgent knocking at the nearby sliding door. Rex goes for his handgun on the coffee table—until he sees a “Doc Brown / Back to the Future” type guy peering in. Rex lets in neighbor REGGIE, who blurts out a litany of conspiracy theories to explain the mysterious death. Rex listens for a while, then gathers up a stack of egg cartons and ushers Reggie on his way.

Beginning: Rex has obviously had a hard night investigating
Middle: He’s nervous about circumstances; gun is handy
End: (comedy convention / intrigue) Rex listens to the crazy ideas—maybe “shopping” for something he can use later.

8. EXT. JETT’S HOUSE – DAY
JETT, early 60s, rugged, is feeding her chickens and collecting eggs. She exchanges Rex’s empties for full cartons of eggs as Rex explains reluctantly that he needs her help. This is where we learn that she’s retired law enforcement, and totally loyal to him. Maybe they used to be in a relationship; maybe they still are. Rex needs someone who knows how to solve the mysterious death before the cops do—and someone who knows when to “shoot, shovel, and shut up.”

Beginning: (Internal dilemma) Rex is reluctant to ask; the family is pathologically private.
Middle: (intrigue) This is the first time Rex actually says out loud what he suspects—and some of what he discovered. First mention of “Norwegian mafia.”
End: Jett is all-in.

9. EXT./INT. LAW OFFICE – DAY
Zeke “goes off the reservation” and visits a lawyer. He puts on a brusque, officious persona, but is obviously nervous. Talks about documents that will turn the family upside-down; discusses the lawyer’s working on a contingency.

Beginning: (intrigue / betrayal) We get a clue into what Zeke is thinking.
Middle: (betrayal) Zeke’s affect indicates that he is nervous, possibly scared.
End: The die has been cast.

10. EXT./INT. POLICE STATION – DAY
Zeke next goes to the county sheriff’s office, the small town’s cop headquarters. He adopts his tough persona, and finds the highest-ranking person there. He attempts to cast doubt on the investigation because of the “local cops’ relationships with my brother Rex.” He implies that Rex is mismanaging the estate process—and very likely involved with the woman’s death. “There might be cover-up,” he says.

Beginning: (intrigue / betrayal) More of the same, this time getting dangerous for Rex.
Middle: (bigger betrayal) Zeke actually lies to set up Rex.
End: He’s taken a step he can’t take back.

11. EXT. RANCH PROPERTY – BACK 40 & CORRALS – DAY
While fencing, yet another brother—a big old lumbering dunderhead named T-BONE—discovers a SKELETON buried at the edge of their property, in the back 40—which borders a decommissioned military Cold War storage/weapons depot. He “helpfully” brings the skull to Rex—as the local cop is telling Rex that there’s really no way the woman would have fallen off the bridge. He believes she was lifted and pushed. Rex wonders aloud about tourists; cop wonders aloud about boyfriends—and Rex tries to derail both the approaching neighbor Reggie and T-Bone before either one gets too close to the cop. Reggie catches a glimpse of the skull—and Rex takes him aside.

Beginning: (comedy convention / another twist) T-Bone represents the modest, rural lifestyle
Middle: (mysteries / intrigue) The woman was murdered? And what…another skeleton?
End: (comedy convention / cliffhanger) Rex has more to unravel; Reggie goes ballistic.

12. INT./EXT. REX & JETT’S PICKUPS / EXT. ZEKE’S FRIEND’S HOUSE – DAY
Rex and Jett are sitting in their vehicles, talking through their driver’s side windows. Rex hands Jett several baggies of dirt, bone fragments, and the skull. He nods to her, then they both drive away. Rex cruises slowly past several houses—until he locates Zeke’s vehicle parked outside a nondescript place. He rousts Zeke, gets him alone, and reads him the riot act. He says he will help him, but that Zeke has to clean up this mess—and that Zeke must participate in branding. Zeke is stubborn and combative.

Beginning: (internal dilemma) Rex considers what to do.
Middle: (uncomfortable moment / setup) While confronting Zeke, he is hoping against hope that he can scare him straight, or at least remind him of their family code.
End: Zeke is in too deep. He’s chosen his path.

Act 3: Branding / the family comes to help = chaos.

13. EXT. YARD / RANCH HOUSE – DAY
As more than a dozen ragtag vehicles (along with some nicer pickups) pull into the yard, we see loads of people of all ages. Siblings (many very large middle-aged men who look very related), adult children, teenagers, and little kids swarm the area. A very few, including Chase, sister CAROLINE [must introduce her earlier!], and friend Jett actually know how to help. Meanwhile, underlying tension is obvious in the elder generation, including Zeke. Several of the younger siblings buzz about the weekly newspaper, which has an article about the WEAPONS DEPOT, and whether it was the site of a military coverup. Rex is worried that it will mention the skeleton—but it does not. He stops this nonsense and starts assigning tasks.

Beginning: (uncomfortable moment / comedy convention) We see the big family in its organic chaos—with excitement and questions mixed in regarding the recent events.
Middle: (reveal) “Those in the know” exhibit tension, knowing there is more to this.
End: (mislead) Rex reacts to the new story about the weapons depot—relieved that the skeleton is not mentioned.

14. EXT. CORRALS / CHUTE – DAY [RANCHING SEQUENCE]
Rex and several helpers ride horseback, pushing cattle from the back 40 toward the corrals. In a series of shots, workers separate the cows and calves, and calves are run through for branding and vaccinations. When Rex and Caroline are working shoulder to shoulder, he quietly says he’s going to need her help with a family problem. She looks at him, understands it’s something big, and agrees instantly. Later, Caroline sees Rex speaking quietly to Chase, who also nods without question. Back in the chute, Zeke, T-Bone, and other large brothers are pushing animals forward. Like Rex, Zeke is asking for help—but he does it by suggesting they derail the managing partners and “take over the operation.” He also offers “a bigger piece of the pie.” The conversation breaks up when something funny and potentially dangerous happens.

Beginning: (intrigue) What seems to be a normal family work day includes subterfuge.
Middle: (intrigue) Both Rex and Zeke choose their armies.
End: (comedy convention) The branding situation provides many opportunities for a laugh, and also to illustrate that most of the family are ill-suited to this job.

15. INT./EXT. RANCH HOUSE – DAY
The group—dirty, dusty, and tired—shares a meal. Rex runs the grill and looks wistfully over the crowd. The setting appears romantically western—but it is not what it seems. Jett reveals that the forensics friend doesn’t think the old skeleton is old enough to have been associated with the weapons depot, but the tests aren’t done.

Beginning: What seems to be a perfect ending to a long day.
Middle: Rex is nostalgic; he knows this life he loves is ending, one way or another.
End: (intrigue) Jett and Rex think they have a piece of evidence against the family.

16. EXT./INT. LOVEY’S STRIP BAR – DAY
Rex and Caroline enter a dodgy establishment, and stop in the entrance area—to look at hundreds of faded snapshots tacked to the walls. Topless dancers, the proprietor—a striking woman with a huge hairdo, Aunt Lovey—and a VERY LARGE, YOUNG BOUNCER WHO LOOKS LIKE THEIR BROTHERS AND NEPHEWS. A shady-looking cousin greets the siblings and sends them upstairs to Lovey’s well-appointed apartment (many similar photos of the lady with the big hair). She’s in her 90s, but they talk frankly about the past and learn a few key facts about their dad (her brother) and their generation’s activities in the early and mid-1900s. Rex asks if she knows anything about people being killed, jokes about the Norwegian mafia—and Lovey laughs, but says it was no joke. And it ain’t over yet.

Beginning: (comedy convention) This colorful group is both funny and dangerous.
Middle: (intrigue) What really happened?
End: (intrigue / suspense / possible betrayal) Is Lovey delivering a threat?

17. EXT. PASTURES / REMOTE HILLTOP – DAY
Rex finishes his rounds, checking the herd, dropping off salt blocks. Then he heads for a tiny dirt track and drives slowly to a very remote location. He and the dog pick raspberries and wait. Soon, Caroline and Jett arrive in their vehicles and they all trade information. Caroline has dug up more details about the “Norwegian mafia” family history—back in the day, prostitution, guns, alcohol, you name it. Nowadays, some cousins are running drugs. Jett confirms that the skeleton was buried about 30 years ago, in the late 1990s, and that it was a man between 18 and 30. Definitely not the military situation from 50 years before that. Rex thanks Jett, realizing that she has really called in a favor… and then reveals details from the office paperwork. Decades ago, a distant relative had threatened Lovey and her husband. He pulls out a handwritten note from Lovey to their dad, dated 1997. It says, “I don’t know how to thank you for your loyalty. You have always been my protector. And now I have that boy on my side.”

Beginning: (intrigue) The pastoral setting clashes with the secret meeting.
Middle: (suspense / reveals) The intelligence they’re sharing could make or break them all.
End: (set-up) The skeleton might have been a hit?

18: EXT. FENCELINE NEAR MILITARY DEPOT / REMOTE MINE SHAFT – DAY
Jett’s pickup bumps along the fence line near where T-Bone found the skeleton. She is driving Rex and Caroline, and they continue up through the forest to another isolated location. Many abandoned mine shafts are visible, remnants from the gold rush days. The group walks past several, until Jett stops at a very deep, vertical shaft. She shines a very powerful light into the darkness.

Beginning: (intrigue / mystery) This location is associated with the Norwegian mafia—but how?
Middle: (suspense / uncomfortable moment) Jett is showing the siblings something they don’t want to see.
End: (cliffhanger) What’s down there?

19. INT. RANCH OFFICE – NIGHT
Rex, Caroline, and Jett have spread paperwork all over the office. They’re unloading the drawers, finding envelopes of cash, small notebooks, and a couple of handguns taped in desk drawers, to the bottom of furniture, in the closet. They break open an old strongbox—and Caroline lifts out the prize: Blank copies of mineral rights transfer forms, along with forged versions—and official documents with the same copied signature. Their late father was illegally transferring all of the property’s mineral rights away from their mother and to Zeke “in thanks for sacrifice for and dedication to the family.” Rex realizes that Zeke is trying to take their inheritance—and he might still be part of the “Norwegian mafia.” As Rex bolts out of the room, Caroline calls out: “What are you going to do?”

Beginning: (intrigue / mystery) They’re ever-closer to solving the mystery!
Middle: (reveal / betrayal!) Answers… and more questions.
End: (suspense) Rex is faced with a bunch of decisions…and a lifetime of history.

20. EXT. RANCH / TRAIL BRIDGE – NIGHT
Rex drives quickly into the yard, and then onto the walking trail, barreling toward the bridge where the woman “fell.” He stops there, bails out of his pickup, and pulls Zeke from the passenger seat. He confronts him there—asking why he killed the woman, why he killed a man for their father in the 1990s, and how many others he put in the mine shaft. Zeke is stunned silent, and then said he didn’t put anyone in the mine shaft. He then makes a childish excuse, saying that the woman knew about their personal family business, and she tried to blackmail him. Rex says, yeah, the mineral rights. I know about those too. Zeke doesn’t know what to do with his rage, says he “deserves” what he was given—and Rex “will be sorry” if he gets in his way. He storms off down the trail.

Beginning: (suspense / betrayal!) Something is about to blow.
Middle: (uncomfortable moment) Zeke can’t stand up to Rex’s power, and he caves with information—which makes him feel more insecure and desperate.
End: (character change) Zeke moves from whiney to dangerous.

Act 4 DILEMMA: Choosing between protecting your brother and your honor

21. EXT./INT. LOVEY’S BAR – DAY
Rex, Caroline, and Jett cruise the alley behind Lovey’s Bar; yes, Zeke’s vehicle is there. Jett asks Rex if he wants police presence, and is silenced immediately by Rex’s look. Inside the bar, we have the inevitable, monumental show-down between Rex and Zeke. Lovey watches from the bar; a couple of goons watch from the doorway. No one intervenes. Zeke’s much larger stature does not help him. He is bested by Rex’s fighting skill; he is shamed by Rex’s words. At the end of the fight, cops push aside the goons. Lovey drifts upstairs.

Beginning: (suspense) This could turn out to be really bad.
Middle: (uncertainty / suspense) We don’t know if Lovey will take sides. We’re sure there are guns there, and plenty of muscle.
End: (suspense) Will the smaller brother really beat the larger, younger brother?

21. EXT. FENCE LINE NEAR MILITARY DEPOT – DAY
Cops are swarming the location where T-Bone found the skeleton. Rex watches from a distance, on horseback. Dog in “wait” position.

[Madeleind Gentinetta]

Madeleine’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!
Vision: I am going to do whatever it takes for me to be a writer of original, emotionally rich stories, recognized for depth, humor, and enduring impact, resulting in financial, critical and audience success.
What I learned from doing this assignment is: It was an eye-opener. I was able to work out so many little, but important details. It took my quite a while, but it was worth the effort.
ACT 1
1.1. OPENING
Scene Arc: From Mary getting ready to perform to falling off the stage.
1 INT. CONCERT CLUB, BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
MARY gets dressed in fancy stage clothing: high shoes, tight dress. With a shaking hand she puts on heavy “age-covering” make-up.
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Mary gets dressed with fancy stage clothing: high shoes, tight dress.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment): Mary’s hands shake when she puts on age-covering make-up.
End: (Suspense): Mary stands in front of the mirror, fully dressed but looking uncertain. It knocks on the door.
Essence: Mary gets ready for a performance.
Conflict: Mary fights age.
Subtext: Mary is covering up her age.
Hope/Fear: We hope all goes well. We fear something is going to happen to her.
2 INT. CONCERT CLUB, BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
The old club owner OLIVIA interrupts the preparations. She apologizes for not having the contract ready. Olivia wants to solve the issue after the concert. Mary is upset.
Beginning: (Suspense)
Vince finally finds Olivia and brings her to Mary in the backstage area. Vince says, “I finally found Olivia.” Olivia enters, clearly not in good shape, with a terrible cough. Mary’s relief is short-lived as she notices Olivia’s condition.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Olivia struggles to catch her breath, she apologizes for forgetting about the contract. Mary’s anger simmers beneath the surface, and she suppresses it, trying to remain composed. Olivia, between coughs, suggests solving the contract issue after the concert. What should sound promising instead fills Mary with doubt.
Ending: (Intrigue)
Vince tries to be exceptionally nice to Olivia, his manner almost sycophantic, creating an awkward atmosphere. Olivia’s worsening condition is evident, hinting at her later death. The scene ends with Mary looking conflicted, trying to refocus on her performance while the uncertainty about her contract looms large.
Essence: Mary is preparing for a performance while worrying about her future.
Conflict: Mary is anxious about securing her contract; Olivia is noncommittal.
Subtext: Mary’s fear of aging and becoming irrelevant.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will get the contract. We fear she will be dismissed because of her age.
Solving: Vince
1.2. INCITING INCIDENT
3 INT. CONCERT CLUB, STAGE – NIGHT
Mary focuses on performing but is distracted by thoughts of the contract. Mary asks Olivia for a drink. Vince, from behind the piano, advises against it. As Mary reaches for the drink, she loses her balance and falls off the stage.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mary steps onto the stage, lights dimming as she grips the microphone, her hands trembling slightly. She begins to sing, but her eyes constantly dart towards Olivia, who is seated in the audience, a subtle reminder of the unresolved contract. The tension builds as the audience watches her struggle to focus.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment)
As her anxiety peaks, Mary abruptly stops singing and asks Olivia for a drink. Vince, from behind the piano, immediately advises against it, his voice filled with concern. The audience murmurs, confused by the break in performance. Mary, feeling the weight of their eyes, hesitates but reaches for the drink anyway, her hand shaking more visibly now.
Ending: (Major Twist) Just as Mary’s fingers brush against the glass, she loses her balance and topples off the stage. The crowd gasps, and chaos ensues. Vince rushes over, abandoning the piano, and the spotlight dramatically swings, casting a harsh light on Mary sprawled on the floor, bringing the scene to a shocking and suspenseful close.
Essence: Mary is anxious about her future and seeks solace in alcohol, leading to a dramatic fall.
Conflict: Mary’s internal struggle between performing well and worrying about her career versus Vince’s concern for her well-being and attempt to prevent her from drinking.
Subtext: Mary’s dependence on alcohol to cope with stress and her fear of being past her prime.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary delivers a great performance and manages her stress. We fear the drink will lead to negative consequences.
Scene Arc: From Mary getting rehab diagnoses to escaping hospital.
4 INT. HOSPITAL, DOUBLE ROOM – DAY
Vince is beside Mary after the operation. The doctor explains that Mary needs intensive rehab for her hip fracture.
Beginning: (Superior Position) Mary groggily wakes up in a hospital bed, her vision blurry. Mary tells Vince that she wants to go home as soon as possible. The audience already knows from Vince’s worried expression that the news isn't good, heightening the tension.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) The doctor enters and explains the severity of Mary’s hip fracture, emphasizing the need for intensive rehab. Vince immediately supports the doctor, emphasizing how important rehab is for her recovery.
Ending: (External Dilemma) After the doctor leaves, Mary, trying to prove she's fine, attempts to get out of bed and insists she can manage on her own. She grimaces in pain but forces a smile, pretending to be okay. Vince tells Mary that leaving without proper rehab could result in permanent damage.
Essence: Mary faces the reality of her injury.
Conflict: Mary’s denial versus medical reality.
Subtext: Her fear of losing independence and relevance.
Hope/Fear: We hope she accepts the need for rehab. We fear she will refuse it and worsen her condition.
5 INT. HOSPITAL, HALLWAY – DAY
Whenever there is an uncomfortable situation with her double room neighbor or nursing staff, Mary tries to use a wheel chair, crutches, or walking chair.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, frustrated with the noise and invasiveness of her double room neighbor, grabs a wheelchair in a desperate attempt to find some peace and quiet.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Mary encounters a nurse who misinterprets her actions as an attempt to join a hospital activity. The nurse cheerfully tries to wheel her to a group session, making Mary even more uncomfortable and desperate to escape.
Ending: (External Dilemma) A nurse patronizes Mary, further pushing her to the brink. Fed up, Mary finally breaks away from the nurse, maneuvering herself down the hallway with the wheelchair. She reaches an exit door and hesitates, aware that escaping could lead to serious consequences but feeling trapped and desperate for freedom.
Essence: Mary is uncomfortable at the hospital and wants to go home.
Conflict: Mary’s desire to escape versus the hospital’s efforts to keep her in place.
Subtext: Mary’s discomfort and resistance to her current situation.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary finds some comfort. We fear Mary will injure herself or worsen her condition.
6 INT. HOSPITAL, DOUBLE ROOM – DAY (maybe drop)
A nurse patronizes Mary. Mary is fed up and escapes the hospital with a walking chair.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) The nurse patronizes Mary, speaking to her as if she is incapable of making her own decisions. Mary’s frustration is palpable as she grits her teeth and tries to keep her composure.
Middle: (Betrayal) The nurse leaves Mary to her own devices, assuming she’s too weak to do anything. Mary feels betrayed by the nurse’s condescending attitude, which fuels her determination to escape.
Ending: (Dilemma) Mary, fed up with the patronizing treatment, decides to escape. She struggles into a walking chair and begins her journey down the hallway, knowing that if she’s caught, she’ll be forced to stay, but if she makes it, she might regain some sense of control.
Essence: Mary escapes the hospital.
Conflict: Mary’s desire to leave versus the hospital’s rules.
Subtext: Her stubbornness and denial.
Hope/Fear: We hope she will reconsider. We fear she will injure herself further.
Scene Arc: From Mary “going back to normal” to arriving at the elderly home.
7 INT. VINCE’S HOME – DAY
Mary arrives at Vince’s home. She urges the shocked Vince to go to Olivia to get the contract, so they can start to prepare the program for the next season.
Beginning: (Surprise) Mary bursts through the door of Vince’s home, startling him. She is still dressed in her hospital clothes, and immediately starts talking about the contract.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Vince is clearly shocked and uncomfortable as Mary, ignoring her own condition, insists he go to Olivia to get the contract. He tries to steer the conversation towards her need for rest and recovery, but Mary brushes off his concerns.
Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Vince faces an internal dilemma as he looks at the determined yet fragile Mary. He knows pushing for the contract could worsen her health, but he also sees how much it means to her. Vince reluctantly agrees to go to Olivia, but his worry for Mary’s well-being is evident.
Essence: Mary urges Vince to secure the contract with Olivia.
Conflict: Mary’s demand for the contract versus Vince’s shock and concern for her health.
Subtext: Mary’s denial of her current physical state and desperation to cling to her career.
Hope/Fear: We hope Vince will prioritize Mary’s health over her career aspiration. We fear Vince will support Mary’s plan.
8 EXT. STREET – DAY
Angry Vince pushes Mary on her walking chair toward his car. He pressures Mary to start her rehab before doing anything else.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Vince angrily pushes Mary on her walking chair toward his car, attracting the attention of passersby who whisper and stare. The public setting amplifies Mary’s humiliation and Vince’s frustration.
Middle: (External Dilemma) Vince stops abruptly, looks Mary in the eye, and lays out the ultimatum: she starts rehab, or they won’t rehearse at all. Mary is faced with the choice of giving in to his demands or continuing to resist, risking her career and health.
Ending: (Cliffhanger) As Mary considers Vince’s ultimatum, the car door is open, and Vince stands there, waiting for her decision. The scene ends with Mary’s unresolved internal struggle, leaving the audience wondering what she will choose.
Essence: Vince pressures Mary to start her rehab.
Conflict: Vince refuses to rehearse unless Mary does her rehab.
Subtext: Vince’s genuine concern for Mary’s health masked by his anger.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will agree to start rehab. We fear she will resist and cause more conflict.
9 INT. CAR – DAY
In the car, Vince calls around to try to organize a place for Mary to start her rehab, after the hospital refuses to take Mary back (there is an insurance issue).
Beginning: (Superior Position) The audience sees Vince frantically making phone calls while driving, his voice filled with frustration. Mary, seated beside him, looks out the window, oblivious to the insurance issue that the audience knows about.
Middle: (External Dilemma) Vince gets through to a hospital administrator who informs him that Mary’s insurance won’t cover her stay due to a technicality. Vince is faced with the dilemma of finding another facility quickly or risking Mary’s health by delaying her rehab.
Ending: (Suspense) Vince finally gets a lead on a place that might accept Mary, but it’s an elderly home, not a rehab center. He glances at Mary, who is still unaware, and the scene ends with Vince hesitantly making the call, leaving the audience in suspense about whether it will work out.
Essence: Vince arranges rehab for Mary.
Conflict: The difficulty of finding a suitable rehab facility.
Subtext: Vince’s determination to ensure Mary gets the help she needs despite logistical hurdle.
Hope/Fear: We hope Vince will find a place for Mary. We fear the challenges will prevent it.
10 EXT. ELDERLY HOME, PARKING – DAY
Mary has a shock when Vince stops in front of an elderly home.
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) As the car pulls up to the elderly home, Mary looks around, confused, thinking they are lost. She expects to see a rehab facility, not an elderly home.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Vince gets out of the car and starts unloading Mary’s belongings. Mary’s confusion turns to horror as she realizes where they are. She starts to protest, but Vince insists, trying to gently explain the situation.
Ending: (Betrayal) Mary, feeling betrayed by Vince for bringing her to an elderly home instead of a rehab center, angrily accuses him of giving up on her. Vince, visibly hurt, tries to explain that this was the best option available, but Mary feels abandoned and betrayed, leaving their relationship strained as she reluctantly steps out of the car.
Essence: Mary realizes she will be staying at an elderly home for rehab.
Conflict: Mary’s shock and resistance versus Vince’s insistence.
Subtext: Mary’s fear of aging and losing her independence.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will accept the necessity of staying at the elderly home. We fear she will refuse and create more conflict.
ACT 2
1.3. TURNING POINT
Scene Arc: From Mary expecting to do rehab to “read books” to a child.
11 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLAZA – DAY
Vince gets hit by a ball from the children playing during their break (there is an integrated primary school). Vince hands Mary over to PLACID (director).
Beginning: (Surprise) Vince gets hit by a ball from the children playing nearby, startling him and Mary. This unexpected moment sets the tone for the chaotic and unpredictable environment Mary is entering.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Mary and Vince approach Placid, Mary immediately starts listing her demands for a single room and a space to rehearse. Placid, caught off guard, tries to remain professional but is visibly taken aback by Mary's assertiveness.
Ending: (Mislead / Reveal) Placid, with a calm demeanor, agrees to Mary's demands, leading her to believe she has won. However, he then reveals that the single room is not available immediately, and the rehearsal space will be in the chapel, which is not what Mary expected. This reveal undercuts Mary's initial sense of control and sets up further conflict.
Essence: Mary’s arrival in her “new” world.
Conflict: Mary makes her demands (possibility to rehearse, single room).
Subtext: Mary’s resistance to her new environment and desire to maintain control over her life.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will start to adapt. We fear she will resist and make her stay difficult.
12 INT. MONTAGE – ELDERLY HOME – DAY
Placid shows Mary to the locations (rehab, integrated school, multipurpose room, chapel, lounge etc.).
Beginning: (Intrigue) As Placid leads Mary through the elderly home, he drops hints about the unique history and hidden stories of the residents and the building, piquing Mary's curiosity despite her resistance.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary tries to cut Placid off mid-tour, expressing her disdain for the strict schedule and rules. Placid firmly but politely continues, highlighting each location's importance and subtly pointing out how Mary’s cooperation would benefit everyone.
Ending: (Mislead / Reveal) Just as Mary begins to believe she might have some autonomy, Placid brings her to the chapel and insists this will be her rehearsal space. Mary is initially relieved until she realizes the chapel is also used for other daily activities, meaning she won’t have it to herself. This reveal frustrates her, as she thought she had found a loophole.
Essence: Placid introduces Mary to the rules.
Conflict: Mary hates to follow rules.
Subtext: Placid’s strictness versus Mary’s rebellious nature.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will accept the structure. We fear she will continue to resist.
Not to forget: candle in chapel for somebody who died (missing person in BB)
13 INT. ELDERLY HOME, LIBRARY – DAY
Each child from the Book Buddies Club reads a book with an elderly person. When Placid sees Sophie drawing on her own, he assigns Mary to read a book to Sophie.
Beginning: (Superior Position) Placid walks Mary into the library, pointing out how each elderly person is paired with a child. He then gestures to Sophie, who is sitting alone and drawing, and instructs Mary to read to her, leaving Mary visibly uncomfortable. (Mary’s dislike for kids has been established in a previous scene.)
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary reluctantly sits beside Sophie and awkwardly picks up a book. Sophie looks up with hopeful eyes, but Mary’s forced smile and stiff demeanor make it clear she’s out of her element.
Ending: (Misinterpretation) Sophie, noticing Mary’s discomfort, misinterprets it as disinterest in the book. Trying to please Mary, Sophie offers to show her drawings instead, but Mary, misunderstanding Sophie’s gesture, reacts coldly, making Sophie withdraw further into herself.
Essence: Placid applies his rule: if she wants to receive, she has to give.
Conflict: Mary hates kids.
Subtext: Mary’s reluctance to engage versus Sophie’s quiet need for connection.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will make an effort. We fear she will reject Sophie.
14 INT. ELDERLY HOME, LIBRARY – DAY
Mary tells stories from her past to Sophie, using jazz slang and metaphorical language in an attempt to be off-putting. Sophie listens attentively, trying to make sense of the stories, and starts drawing literal interpretations of Mary’s metaphorical language.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Mary, with a mischievous glint in her eye, starts telling Sophie wild stories from her jazz days, using slang and metaphors that seem nonsensical. Sophie, intrigued, leans in closer, trying to understand.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) As Mary continues, Sophie starts drawing, attempting to interpret Mary’s metaphors literally. Mary, noticing this, smiles to herself, thinking she has successfully confused Sophie.
Ending: (Subtle Realization) Sophie proudly shows Mary her drawings, which are surprisingly accurate and insightful representations of Mary’s metaphors. Mary, initially taken aback, maintains a neutral expression but her eyes betray a flicker of amazement. Sophie, perceptive to this subtle reaction, smiles softly, realizing she has impressed Mary. This creates a subtle bond between them, understood without words.
Essence: Mary shares her past with Sophie in a confusing, metaphorical style to repel her.
Conflict: Mary bends the rules of the Book Buddies Club.
Subtext: Mary’s attempt to push Sophie away versus Sophie’s unexpected interest and connection.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s stories will create a bond. We fear her behavior will push Sophie away.
Scene Arc: From checking into a double room to attending Olivia’s funeral.
15 INT. ELDERLY HOME, RESIDENTIAL WING – DAY
Nursing staff picks up Mary. They slowly walk through the corridors of the residential wing. On the way to her new room, Mary gets depressing glimpses of everyday life.
Beginning: (Intrigue) The nursing staff wheels Mary through the residential wing, and Mary catches sight of various scenes: a resident talking to an empty chair, another staring blankly at a TV, and a group playing a subdued card game. Each scene hints at stories and lives, piquing Mary’s curiosity despite her discomfort.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As they continue, Mary spots an elderly man struggling to feed himself, food falling everywhere. The nurse stops to assist, creating an awkward pause in the journey. Mary’s discomfort is palpable as she watches, torn between pity and a fear of seeing her potential future.
Ending: (Suspense) They finally arrive at her new room, the door slowly opening to reveal a shared space. Mary's face falls as she sees the limited personal space, shared facilities, and a frail woman—her new roommate—who stares blankly at her. Mary’s internal struggle is visible as she takes in her new reality, the suspense of how she will react hanging in the air.
Essence: Mary is introduced to her new environment, highlighting her discomfort.
Conflict: Mary’s resistance to accepting her new surroundings.
Subtext: Mary’s fear of aging.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will find some comfort or adapt to her new surroundings. We fear she will feel trapped and resist integration.
16 INT. ELDERLY HOME, DOUBLE ROOM – DAY
Mary is crushed when she enters her new room: it’s a double room. Her room neighbor is the friendly Hortense with dementia, a Marlene Dietrich worshipper.
Mary wants to know, when she can leave the institution. The nurse says for weddings and funerals. (Hortense tells Mary that she broke her hip like Marlene).
Beginning: (Suspense) As Mary wheels into the room, the nurse’s nonchalant comment about leaving only for weddings and funerals hangs in the air. Mary’s eyes widen, the suspense building as she realizes the limitations of her new environment.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Hortense, with a friendly but confused smile, starts talking about Marlene Dietrich and how she also broke her hip, drawing a direct parallel between herself and Mary. Mary shifts uncomfortably, feeling her resistance to the forced companionship.
Ending: (Intrigue) The nurse, overhearing Mary’s insistence on leaving for the hairdresser, smirks and says, “Good luck with that.” The comment lingers, creating intrigue about how Mary will navigate this new reality and whether she will find ways to regain some semblance of control.
Essence: Mary is confronted with her new reality and the limitations of her situation.
Conflict: Mary’s desire for privacy and control versus the institution’s rules and setup.
Subtext: Mary’s struggle with accepting her aging and the loss of her autonomy.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will find a way to cope with her new situation. We fear she will feel even more isolated and desperate.
Not forget: we have to finish with “wedding and funeral”.
Also, Hortense must say something about “family”.
17 EXT. CEMETERY – DAY
Vince and Mary stand at the open grave, when Olivia’s coffin is lowered into the grave. Vince points to a snobbish man in black, Olivia’s son Dieter, the new club owner.
Beginning: (Major Twist) Vince and Mary are at a funeral. The audience expects a different setting but is immediately thrust into the gravity of Olivia’s death and its impact on Mary’s future.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Olivia’s coffin is lowered into the grave, the solemnity of the moment is punctuated by the tension of what the future holds for Mary and Vince. The air is thick with unspoken fears and uncertainties.
End: (Intrigue) Vince discreetly points out Dieter, Olivia’s snobbish son, standing apart from the mourners. His aloof demeanor and cold stare make Mary uncomfortable, highlighting the potential challenges ahead.
Essence: The transition of power and control at the concert club.
Conflict: Mary’s grief over losing Olivia and uncertainty about the future.
Subtext: The looming challenge of dealing with Dieter and the changing dynamics at the club.
Hope/Fear: We hope there will be a future for Mary and Vince with Dieter as new owner. We fear Dieter will bring additional challenges to her already difficult situation.
2.1. NEW PLAN

Scene Arc: From setting up a test performance to delaying the contract
18 INT. RESTAURANT, FUNERAL MEAL – DAY
Mary reconnects with a familiar face among the mourners: Faye, a journalist and an old acquaintance. Mary and Vince condolence Dieter. He proposes a meeting to see them performing.
Beginning: (Surprise) Mary spots Faye, an old acquaintance and journalist, among the mourners. Their unexpected reunion in such a somber setting piques curiosity about their past connection and potential future interactions.
Middle: (Suspense) As Mary and Vince offer their condolences to Dieter, the awkwardness of discussing business amidst grief becomes palpable. Dieter's stoic demeanor and abrupt shift to business matters add to the tension.
End: (Uncertainty) Dieter proposes a meeting to see Mary and Vince perform, but his tone leaves them unsure of his true intentions. The uncertainty about whether this opportunity will be beneficial or another hurdle lingers as they part ways.
Essence: Dieter introduces the possibility of evaluating Mary and Vince's performance for future opportunities.
Conflict: The tension between mourning Olivia and addressing professional concerns.
Subtext: Dieter's pragmatic approach to business despite the emotional context.
Hope/Fear: We hope Dieter will see the value in Mary and Vince's performance. We fear he might be unsympathetic to their situation.
2.2. NEW PLAN IN ACTION
19 INT. ELDERLY HOME, REHAB ROOM – DAY
Enrique works with Mary on her rehab exercises. Mary tries to overdo it, pushing herself too hard. Enrique has to stop her, emphasizing the importance of gradual progress.
Beginning: (Major Twist) Mary can't believe her eyes when she sees her rehab trainer, Enrique: the female gaze – for a change. Mary, determined to recover quickly, intensifies her rehab exercises, ignoring Enrique’s warnings. The tension builds as she pushes herself further, the potential for injury looming over each movement.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary’s face contorts in pain, but she hides it, trying to maintain her facade of strength. Enrique, noticing her struggle, steps in, creating an awkward confrontation as he insists she slow down.
End: (Internal Dilemma) Mary, torn between her desire to recover quickly and Enrique’s insistence on caution, reluctantly agrees to follow his advice. Her internal struggle is evident, as she battles between ambition and self-preservation.
Essence: Mary’s overexertion during rehab.
Conflict: Mary’s ambition to leave quickly versus Enrique’s insistence on a proper recovery.
Subtext: Mary’s desperation to escape and return to her career.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will follow Enrique’s advice. We fear she will harm herself by pushing too hard.
20 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLACID’S OFFICE – DAY
Mary insists on using the multipurpose room for rehearsals, but Placid refuses, stating it’s reserved for internal occasions. He offers the chapel instead, which Mary reluctantly accepts despite her discomfort with it. Placid also tells Mary that he expects her to continue with the Book Buddy Club, mentioning that Sophie has been asking for her.
Beginning: (Surprise) Mary barges into Placid’s office, insisting on using the multipurpose room for her rehearsals. Placid, taken aback by her audacity, listens with a raised eyebrow, creating a tension-filled atmosphere.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Placid calmly refuses Mary’s request, explaining that the multipurpose room is reserved for internal occasions. He offers the chapel instead. Mary, visibly frustrated and uncomfortable with the idea, reluctantly accepts. The tension between them is palpable as Mary struggles to hide her disappointment.
End: (Superior Position) Placid reminds Mary of her Book Buddy duties, mentioning that Sophie has been asking for her. Mary’s initial frustration is replaced by a look of realization as she understands the additional responsibilities and constraints she faces. The audience knows this added pressure will challenge Mary’s plans further.
Essence: Mary negotiates for a rehearsal space and is reminded of her Book Buddy duties.
Conflict: Mary’s persistence versus Placid’s rules and expectations.
Subtext: Mary’s desperation to reclaim her career versus the institutional constraints and her new responsibilities.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary gets a suitable rehearsal space. We fear the chapel will demoralize her and the additional responsibility will overwhelm her.
21 INT. ELDERLY HOME, CHAPEL – DAY
Vince and Mary rehearse together in the chapel, going over songs and performance routines. Elderly residents and children, including Sophie, gather outside the chapel, intrigued by the music. Placid observes the growing audience. Vince informs Mary that Dieter is coming the next day.
Beginning: (Surprise) Vince tells Mary that Dieter is coming tomorrow. Mary, though taken aback, quickly masks her anxiety with determination. They start their rehearsal in the chapel, the sound of their music beginning to fill the space.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Mary sings, her face occasionally shows hints of pain, but she pushes through, determined to perfect her performance. The music catches the attention of the elderly who start entering the chapel, clapping their hands out of rhythm. Mary is visibly annoyed by their presence and the offbeat clapping, but she keeps singing.
End: (Uncertainty) Placid enters and sees everybody enjoying the performance. Mary notices him but does not stop the elderly, even though she is unhappy about their participation. The scene ends with an air of uncertainty about how this impromptu audience will affect her rehearsal and performance.
Essence: Mary prepares for her comeback performance.
Conflict: Balancing the need for rest with the desire to perform.
Subtext: Mary’s anxiety about her readiness.
Hope/Fear: We hope the rehearsals go well. We fear Mary’s injury might hinder her performance.
Not forget: Maybe Vince tells her something at the end… so she goes to the rehab.
22 INT. ELDERLY HOME, REHAB ROOM – DAY
Mary sneaks into the rehab room and starts doing the exercises on her own, determined to prove she can still perform. She overexerts herself and gets hurt.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mary carefully sneaks into the rehab room, glancing around to ensure she’s not caught. The room is dimly lit and quiet, creating a tense atmosphere as she starts her exercises with a determined look on her face.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Mary pushes through her exercises, her face contorts in pain, but she ignores it, gritting her teeth and continuing. The discomfort builds as she struggles with the equipment, her movements becoming increasingly strained.
End: (Major Twist) Suddenly, Mary’s leg gives out, and she collapses to the floor, gasping in pain. The scene ends with her lying there, clutching her injured leg, her expression a mix of fear and frustration at her own limitations.
Essence: Mary’s overexertion due to her determination.
Conflict: Her ambition versus her physical limitations.
Subtext: Mary’s fear of losing her career drives her to push too hard.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will realize her limits. We fear she will injure herself further.
23 INT. ELDERLY HOME, CHAPEL – DAY
Vince and Dieter are present in the chapel. Mary, having pushed herself too hard, arrives in a wheelchair with Enrique. Mary tries to stand and perform but is visibly struggling. Dieter sees this and says she has to be healthy before discussing a contract renewal. He leaves, and Vince insists that Mary focus on getting better before stressing over a new program.
Beginning: (Suspense) Vince and Dieter wait in the chapel, the tension palpable as they anticipate Mary's entrance. The sound of her wheelchair echoes, heightening the suspense as she appears with Enrique, clearly struggling but determined.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) As Mary attempts to stand and perform, her pain is evident. Her voice wavers, and she visibly strains to maintain her composure. The discomfort in the room grows as Dieter watches, unimpressed, while Vince’s worry intensifies.
End: (Betrayal) Dieter coldly states that Mary must be healthy before any contract renewal can be discussed, then leaves without further consideration. Vince, once more, supports Dieter's point of view, siding with Dieter, which leaves Mary feeling abandoned and betrayed by her closest ally.
Essence: Mary faces the consequences of overexertion.
Conflict: Mary’s desire to impress Dieter versus her physical condition.
Subtext: The physical manifestation of Mary’s internal struggle and desperation.
Hope/Fear: We hope Dieter will see Mary’s potential despite her condition. We fear her current state will delay the contract.
Scene Arc: From Mary restarting her rehab to being replaced by a young singer.
24 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLAZA – DAY
Mary watches Dieter and Vince leaving; Vince does not turn around. When Mary turns around, she notices through the glass windows that children are laughing at Sophie when she is presenting something in the classroom. Then Sophie sits on her own.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Mary watches Dieter and Vince walk away, feeling a sense of abandonment as Vince doesn’t turn around to acknowledge her. The tension builds as Mary is left standing alone, the weight of isolation pressing down on her.
Middle: (Intrigue) Mary turns around and notices through the glass windows that children are laughing at Sophie as she presents something in the classroom. The scene shifts focus, piquing Mary's curiosity about what is happening to Sophie.
End: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary sees Sophie sitting alone after being laughed at by her classmates. The pain of witnessing Sophie’s isolation mirrors Mary’s own feelings, creating an emotional and uncomfortable moment for her as she contemplates her own vulnerability and growing connection to Sophie.
Essence: Mary observes the impact of her absence on Sophie and Vince's departure.
Conflict: Mary’s sense of abandonment and isolation versus her realization of Sophie’s struggle.
Subtext: Mary’s growing connection to Sophie and awareness of her own vulnerability.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will find a way to reconnect with Sophie. We fear she will feel more isolated and abandoned.
25 MONTAGE 1: Mary's Struggles and Observations
INT. ELDERLY HOME, DINING ROOM – DAY
(Uncomfortable Moment): Mary sits unhappy in front of her plate, alone at a table.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, DOUBLE ROOM – DAY
(Uncomfortable Moment): Hortense asks Mary if she has family; Mary denies it and is annoyed.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, KITCHEN – NIGHT
(Intrigue): Mary, still hungry, sneaks into the kitchen at night and finds some food in the fridge.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, REHAB ROOM – DAY
(Misinterpretation): Mary unmotivated works on her rehab exercises with Enrique. Enrique tries to cheer her up by incorporating stage performance moves.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, LOUNGE – DAY
(Betrayal): Mary calls Vince, but he does not pick up the phone. Then, Mary reluctantly joins other residents in playing cards.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, CHAPEL – DAY
(Uncertainty): Mary sits alone in the chapel, staring into the burning candle.
Essence: Mary’s struggle to adapt to her new environment and her observation of Sophie’s difficulties.
Conflict: Mary’s internal battle between resisting and accepting her new life versus the challenges Sophie faces.
Subtext: Mary’s denial of her situation and her growing empathy for Sophie, who is also alone.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary finds a way to adapt and connect with others. We fear she will continue to feel isolated and unhappy.
26 INT. ELDERLY HOME, LIBRARY – DAY
Mary does not want to tell stories; she wants Sophie to tell her something. Sophie tells Mary that her classmates made fun of her drawings. Mary encourages Sophie to be more confident and assertive despite the teasing. She admits that she loves Sophie’s drawings of her stories.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Sophie reluctantly shares with Mary how her classmates made fun of her drawings. Mary's face hardens as she recalls similar experiences from her own past.
Middle: (Intrigue) Mary asks Sophie to tell her more about the drawings and what they mean to her. Sophie hesitantly explains, her eyes lighting up as she talks about her passion.
End: (Character Changes Radically) Mary reveals her admiration for Sophie’s drawings, telling her how much they resonate with her own stories. Sophie’s face lights up with newfound confidence, understanding that her work is valued.
Essence: Mary mentors Sophie in confidence.
Conflict: Sophie’s hurt feelings versus Mary’s encouragement.
Subtext: Mary’s own experiences with criticism.
Hope/Fear: We hope Sophie gains confidence. We fear she might remain discouraged.
Not to forget: Mary says something like: these drawings are terrible
27 MONTAGE 2: Mary's Growing Bond with Sophie and Recovery
INT. ELDERLY HOME, REHAB ROOM – DAY
Mary makes progress and dares to take cool steps with Enrique.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, KITCHEN – NIGHT
Mary sneaks into the kitchen to get some food. Julia, the kitchen aid, surprises her and makes her some extra food.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, DOUBLE ROOM – DAY
Mary lies on her bed, pretending to sleep. Sophie sneaks in to bring one of her drawings. Sophie discovers Hortense’s denture in the glass and thinks it looks funny. She takes it out. Mary can’t believe her eyes.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLAZA – DAY
Later, Mary observes how Sophie uses the denture and gets the other kids to laugh. Mary laughs too.
INT. ELDERLY HOME, CHAPEL – DAY
Mary is in the chapel on her own, singing.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Mary makes noticeable progress in her rehab, daring to take bold steps with Enrique’s encouragement. Her determination is palpable, hinting at her gradual recovery and rekindling her love for performing.
Middle: (Surprise) Mary sneaks into the kitchen for a late-night snack and is caught by Julia, the kitchen aid. Instead of reprimanding her, Julia surprises Mary by making her some extra food, showing a sense of community and support within the home.
End: (Humor/Uncertainty) Sophie sneaks into Mary’s room with one of her drawings and finds Hortense’s denture in a glass. She takes it out, finding it funny. Mary is initially shocked but can’t help but laugh when she sees Sophie using it to make the other kids laugh. This light-hearted moment strengthens their bond and shows Mary’s increasing acceptance of her environment.
Essence: Mary’s recovery process and her deepening bond with Sophie.
Conflict: Mary’s struggle to recover and engage with her environment versus her growing attachment to Sophie.
Subtext: Mary’s increasing acceptance of her situation and the impact of her influence on Sophie.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s recovery and bond with Sophie continue to strengthen. We fear any setbacks in her recovery or disruptions in her bond with Sophie.
28 INT. ELDERLY HOME, REHAB ROOM – DAY
Mary is doing really well. Enrique thinks it’s finally time for Mary to start to rehearse again. Beginning: (Intrigue) Enrique watches Mary perform her rehab exercises with newfound vigor. He hints at a surprise, which piques Mary's curiosity.
Middle: (Surprise) Enrique finally reveals that he thinks Mary is ready to start rehearsing again. Mary’s face lights up with excitement, but Enrique reminds her to take it easy and not overdo it, creating a suspenseful moment of concern for her health.
End: (Uncertainty) Mary eagerly agrees and starts practicing some dance steps. While she looks strong, there are moments where she wobbles slightly, leaving both Enrique and Mary in a state of hopeful yet cautious anticipation.
Essence: Mary’s readiness to rehearse.
Conflict: Mary’s excitement versus the potential risks.
Subtext: Mary’s determination to return to the stage.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s rehearsals go well. We fear she might push herself too hard.
29 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLACID’S OFFICE – DAY
Mary surprises Placid, who is embarrassed when she catches him watching a ballet performance. Mary says Enrique has given her the green light and she would like to surprise Vince with the good news and adds, she needs to go to the hairdresser, making clear she needs permission to go. Placid gets the insider joke and lets Mary go.
Beginning: (Surprise) Mary catches Placid watching a ballet performance on his computer, causing him to be embarrassed. Her unexpected entrance and Placid’s hidden passion for ballet set an intriguing tone.
Middle: (Suspense) Mary, with a playful smile, informs Placid that Enrique has given her the green light to rehearse. She casually mentions needing to visit the hairdresser, hinting at her need for permission to leave. Placid gets the joke and relaxes a bit, enjoying the light-hearted moment.
End: (Uncertainty) Placid, still slightly flustered but amused, grants Mary permission to leave. However, his lingering hesitation hints at his concern for Mary’s well-being, leaving the audience wondering if she will overexert herself again.
Essence: Mary requests permission to leave.
Conflict: Mary’s request versus Placid’s rules.
Subtext: Mary’s playful approach and Placid’s hidden passion.
Hope/Fear: We hope Placid allows Mary to go. We fear he might refuse.
30 INT. VINCE’S HOME – DAY
Mary arrives at Vince’s home, nicely dressed and fresh from the hairdresser. She is shocked to discover Vince singing with a younger singer. Vince and Mary argue until Vince admits that Dieter told him to look for a younger singer if he wants to continue with a weekly show in his bar.Beginning: (Surprise) Mary arrives at Vince’s home, looking refreshed and confident after her visit to the hairdresser.
Middle: (Major twist) Her optimism quickly turns to shock when she sees Vince rehearsing with a younger singer. Mary’s face hardens as she confronts Vince, her voice trembling with anger and hurt. Vince tries to explain the situation, but his words seem to fall flat, deepening the uncomfortable tension between them.
End: (Betrayal) Vince reluctantly admits that Dieter told him to look for a younger singer if he wants to keep his weekly show at the bar. Mary feels betrayed, her fear of being replaced and losing her relevance becoming a painful reality.
Essence: Mary confronts Vince about being replaced.
Conflict: Mary’s shock and anger versus Vince’s pragmatism.
Subtext: Mary’s fear of being replaced and losing her relevance.
Hope/Fear: We hope Vince explains the situation clearly. We fear this will create a rift between them.
Scene Arc: From Mary being on her own to reinventing herself.
31 INT. CAB – NIGHT
Mary, emotionally distraught, takes a cab back to the elderly home. The cab driver is oblivious to her pain and makes light-hearted conversation, exacerbating her feelings of isolation and hurt.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, with tears welling up, hails a cab. As she gets in, the cab driver starts a light-hearted conversation, completely unaware of her emotional turmoil.
Middle: (Superior Position) The driver continues chatting about mundane topics, while Mary’s internal struggle intensifies. The audience knows the depth of her pain, creating a stark contrast with the driver's obliviousness, which exacerbates her feelings of isolation.
End: (Unexpected Reaction/Paradox) Instead of silently battling her emotions, Mary unexpectedly and sharply interrupts the driver’s cheerful chatter with a sarcastic remark about the superficiality of youth. This paradoxical reaction, laced with her signature wit and bitterness, showcases her emotional fragility while staying true to her character. The driver, taken aback, falls silent, highlighting Mary’s paradoxical nature and strength even in moments of vulnerability.
Essence: Mary’s emotional pain sets in during the cab ride.
Conflict: Mary’s internal struggle versus the driver’s obliviousness.
Subtext: Mary’s feeling of isolation and the insensitivity of others.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary can hold herself together. We fear the driver’s comments will worsen her emotional state.
32 INT. ELDERLY HOME, EMPTY CORRIDORS – NIGHT
Mary walks through the empty corridors of the elderly home, the silence amplifying her sense of loneliness and despair. The dark and empty hallways reflect her internal state.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary walks through the empty corridors of the elderly home, her footsteps echoing in the silence. The dark and empty hallways amplify her sense of loneliness and despair.
Middle: (Superior Position) As Mary continues walking, she pauses by a window, looking out at the moonlit night. Her reflection in the glass shows a woman fighting to hold herself together, a stark contrast to the seemingly calm exterior she tries to maintain.
End: (Uncertainty) Mary reaches a crossroad in the corridor and pauses, unsure which direction to take, both literally and metaphorically. The uncertainty of her path forward mirrors her internal struggle, leaving the audience in suspense about her emotional state.
Essence: Mary’s loneliness and internal struggle.
Conflict: Mary’s feelings of abandonment and isolation.
Subtext: The emptiness of the corridors mirrors Mary’s emotional void.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary finds solace. We fear she will succumb to her despair.
33 INT. ELDERLY HOME, DOUBLE ROOM – NIGHT
Mary destroys a picture of her and Vince, venting her frustration and pain. She then looks around the room and notices the pictures of Marlene Dietrich. Hortense wakes up and tells Mary that her breaking her hip is just like Marlene Dietrich’s experience, planting the idea in Mary’s mind.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, overwhelmed with frustration and pain, tears apart a picture of her and Vince. Her anger and despair are palpable, filling the room with tension
Middle: (Intrigue) As Mary looks around the room, her eyes fall on the numerous pictures of Marlene Dietrich that decorate Hortense’s side. Her curiosity is piqued, and she remembers what Hortense told her about her broken hip and the parallel to Marlene Dietrich.
End: (Major Twist) Mary has an inspirational moment. She is completely taken by the idea and seems completely positively overwhelmed.
Essence: Mary’s emotional breakdown and the birth of a new idea.
Conflict: Mary’s despair versus the spark of inspiration from Hortense’s comment.
Subtext: The parallel between Mary and Marlene Dietrich.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary finds solace and inspiration. We fear she might remain stuck in her despair.
2.3. MIDPOINT
Scene Arc: From Mary announcing her comeback to discovering her son
34 INT. ELDERLY HOME, GARDEN – DAY
Essence: Mary discusses her comeback idea (Marlene program) with Faye, who encourages her and agrees to write an article under Mary's maiden name.
Beginning: (Character Changes Radically) Mary, energized by her new idea, sits with Faye in the garden and excitedly shares her vision for a Marlene Dietrich comeback program. Faye listens intently, her curiosity piqued by Mary’s enthusiasm and determination.
Middle: (Uncertainty) As Mary outlines her plans, doubts start to creep in. She worries aloud about whether she still has the talent and stamina to pull it off. Faye, sensing Mary’s anxiety, reassures her but also acknowledges the challenges they might face, adding a layer of suspense to the conversation.
End: (Suspense) Faye, inspired by Mary’s passion, agrees to write an article about the comeback, using Mary’s maiden name to create a fresh start. This agreement symbolizes a new beginning and the potential for success, but the road ahead remains uncertain.
Essence: Mary’s reinvention and sharing of her new vision.
Conflict: Mary’s excitement about the new program versus the uncertainty of its success.
Subtext: Mary’s transformation and Faye’s support.
Hope/Fear: We hope Faye supports Mary’s idea and helps her get it out. We fear the challenges that lie ahead.
35 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLACID’S OFFICE – DAY
Mary presents Faye's article to Placid and asks to use the multipurpose room for rehearsals.
Beginning: (Misinterpretation) Mary, brimming with excitement, presents Faye's article to Placid and asks to use the multipurpose room for rehearsals. Placid misunderstands her request and thinks she wants to organize a concert for the elderly home residents.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Placid, with a polite but firm tone, denies Mary’s request, stating that the multipurpose room is reserved for internal occasions only. Mary’s frustration becomes evident as she realizes her request is being misunderstood.
End: (Cliffhanger) Mary tries to explain her need to rehearse for a professional comeback, but Placid remains firm in his decision. Mary leaves the office, her determination clashing with the demoralizing reality of the institutional constraints, leaving her next move uncertain.
Essence: Mary asks Placid to use the multipurpose room for rehearsals. Placid misunderstands and thinks it's a concert for the elderly home.
Conflict: Placid denies Mary’s request, saying it's reserved for internal occasions, leading to Mary’s frustration.
Subtext: Mary’s desperation to reclaim her career versus the institutional constraints and her realization of the limitations imposed by the elderly home.
Hope/Fear: We hope Placid allows Mary to use the multipurpose room. We fear he will misunderstand and refuse her request. We hope Mary finds another way to rehearse. We fear she will be demoralized by the refusal.
36 INT. ELDERLY HOME, KITCHEN – NIGHT
Mary looks for a remote place to rehearse and finds Julia in the kitchen.
Beginning: (Superior Position) Mary sneaks into the kitchen, thinking it’s an ideal remote place to rehearse. She’s caught off guard when she finds Julia there, already drinking.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Julia, seeing Mary, offers her a drink, reminiscing about old times. Mary hesitates, visibly struggling with her temptation and her resolve to stay sober.
End: (Uncertainty) Mary firmly declines the drink and starts to leave, but Julia, feeling rejected, becomes more insistent. Mary stands her ground, but the tension remains high, leaving her next actions and the consequences uncertain.
Essence: Mary seeks out a remote place to rehearse and encounters Julia.
Conflict: Julia wants a drinking partner, but Mary wants to stay away from alcohol.
Subtext: Mary’s struggle with her past dependence on alcohol and her determination to stay sober.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary can find a place to rehearse without compromising her sobriety. We fear Julia’s influence might lead her back to drinking.
37 INT. ELDERLY HOME, KITCHEN – NIGHT (BACKSTORY)
Mary tells Julia about her difficult times and why she can’t have alcohol.
Beginning: (Character changes radically) Mary, feeling cornered by Julia’s insistence, decides to open up about her past. She starts hesitantly, revealing bits and pieces of her struggle with alcohol.
Middle: (Mislead A) Julia listens intently, her expression shifting from curiosity to understanding as Mary recounts the difficulties she faced and how hard it was to stay sober. Mary’s openness adds depth to her character and draws Julia’s empathy.
End: (Uncertainty) Julia, moved by Mary’s story, puts away the alcohol and promises to support her instead, assuring Mary that she will withhold it if asked. This creates a bond but leaves an air of uncertainty about the future.
Essence: Mary confides in Julia about her past struggles with alcohol.
Conflict: Mary’s need for a rehearsal space versus her past struggles with alcohol.
Subtext: Mary’s vulnerability and the strength it takes to stay sober.
Hope/Fear: We hope Julia understands and supports Mary. We fear this might strain their relationship.
38 INT. ELDERLY HOME, DOUBLE ROOM – NIGHT
Hortense tells Mary that her son was here and looking for her.
Beginning: (Major twist) Mary enters the room, and Hortense, with a mixture of excitement and confusion, tells her that a young man was looking for her, claiming to be her son.
Middle: (Reveal B to Mislead A) Mary’s face tightens as she processes this information. The weight of unresolved family issues and the suddenness of the news create a tense atmosphere. Hortense, sensing Mary’s discomfort, tries to lighten the mood but only adds to the awkwardness.
End: (Internal Dilemma) Mary sits down, visibly shaken. She grapples with the decision of whether to reach out to her son or continue avoiding the pain of their past. The scene ends with Mary in deep thought, highlighting her internal struggle.
Essence: Hortense informs Mary that her son was looking for her.
Conflict: Mary’s emotional turmoil about her son’s visit.
Subtext: Mary’s unresolved issues with her family and her feelings of abandonment.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary can reconcile with her past and her son. We fear this will add to her emotional burden.
Scene Arc: From Mary proudly announcing her upcoming concert to Robert suggesting she retire gracefully
39 INT. ELDERLY HOME, CAFETERIA – DAY
Mary meets Robert and tries to impress him with her upcoming show. Sophie approaches Mary to meet before the Book Buddy Club, but Mary sends her away because she is with her son. Vince arrives with flowers to apologize, but Mary rejects Vince and his flowers.
Beginning: (Superior Position) Mary, with a nervous smile, meets Robert in the cafeteria and tries to impress him by talking about her upcoming show. The tension is palpable as Robert seems more interested in connecting on a personal level.
Middle: (Misleading) Sophie, excited to meet with Mary before the Book Buddy Club, approaches their table. Mary, distracted by her conversation with Robert, brusquely sends Sophie away. The scene heightens as Vince enters with flowers, ready to apologize for his earlier actions.
End: (Betrayal) Mary, focused on impressing Robert, rejects Vince and his flowers in front of everyone, leaving him visibly hurt. This creates a sense of betrayal for both Vince and Sophie, who witness Mary's dismissal. The scene closes with Robert observing the unfolding drama, adding to the tension and uncertainty about their relationship.
Essence: Mary is rejecting Robert, Sophie, and Vince in her effort to focus on impressing her son with her upcoming concert.
Conflict: Robert wants to connect emotionally, but Mary focuses on impressing him. Sophie and Vince are also rejected in her pursuit.
Subtext: Mary’s need to justify her past decisions and impress her son, while struggling to balance her personal life and career ambitions.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary will connect with Robert and gain his support. We fear she will alienate him by focusing solely on her career. We also fear Sophie and Vince will feel neglected.
40 INT. ELDERLY HOME, CAFETERIA – DAY
Mary has to leave to join the Book Buddy Club with Sophie. Robert and Vince feel rejected and disconnected from Mary. Robert and Vince meet for the first time. Placid comes by, and Vince gives him the flowers because Mary does not want them.
Beginning: (Misleading) Mary, aware of her obligation to the Book Buddy Club, reluctantly excuses herself from Robert and Vince. The awkwardness is palpable as both men feel sidelined by her decision.
Middle: (Superior Position) As Mary leaves, Robert and Vince, feeling rejected, strike up a conversation. They bond over their mutual frustration with Mary, unaware of her deeper struggles and responsibilities.
End: (Cliffhanger) Placid arrives, noticing the tension. Vince, still holding the flowers, hands them to Placid, explaining that Mary didn’t want them. Placid accepts the flowers with a puzzled look, adding a layer of intrigue to the scene as Robert and Vince watch Mary leave with a mix of understanding and lingering disappointment.
Essence: Mary’s obligation to Sophie disrupts her time with Robert, while Vince and Robert bond over their shared rejection by Mary.
Conflict: Mary’s commitment to the Book Buddy Club versus Robert’s desire for her attention. Vince’s attempt to reconcile with Mary is thwarted.
Subtext: The tension between Mary’s professional and personal responsibilities, and the mutual understanding between Vince and Robert.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary can manage both commitments. We fear Robert will feel neglected. We hope the encounter leads to a better understanding between Vince and Robert, but we fear it will create more tension.
41 INT. ELDERLY HOME, BOOK BUDDY CLUB – DAY
Mary, excited about her show, asks Sophie about social media. Sophie tells Mary to focus on her son and not the concert.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, excited about her upcoming show, eagerly asks Sophie for advice on using social media to promote it. Sophie, still feeling hurt from being brushed off earlier, responds coolly.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Mary, not picking up on Sophie’s mood, continues to talk about the concert. Sophie, trying to get through to Mary, suggests that she should focus on reconciling with her son instead of the concert, causing a moment of tension between them.
End: (Internal Dilemma) Mary, taken aback by Sophie’s advice, is left to contemplate whether to heed Sophie’s suggestion or continue prioritizing her career. The scene ends with Mary in deep thought, reflecting on her priorities and relationships.
Essence: Mary seeks Sophie’s advice on social media for her show, but Sophie advises Mary to prioritize her son.
Conflict: Sophie is upset about being neglected earlier, and Mary’s excitement about the concert versus Sophie’s advice.
Subtext: Mary’s focus on her career versus Sophie’s need for attention, and the balance between Mary’s career and her personal relationships.
Hope/Fear: We hope Sophie will help Mary. We fear Sophie’s feelings of neglect will affect their interaction. We hope Mary will take Sophie’s advice. We fear she will disregard it.
42 INT. ELDERLY HOME, ROOM – NIGHT
Mary makes videos of herself.
Beginning: (Uncertainty) Mary, determined but visibly anxious, sets up her camera and lighting, fumbling with the equipment. Her hands shake slightly as she adjusts the tripod, showcasing her nervous energy. She begins recording, her voice wavering slightly as she introduces herself and talks about her upcoming show.
Middle: (Surprise) As Mary continues, she experiences a mix of emotions. When she manages to deliver a particularly strong and confident take, her face lights up with a hopeful smile, a glimpse of the old Mary who loved performing. However, technical issues soon arise—the camera battery dies, or the lighting falls—causing her frustration to build. She slumps in her chair, the weight of her struggles evident. Determined not to give up, she resolves the issues and starts again, only to face another setback, plunging her back into despair.
End: (Cliffhanger) After finally recording a satisfactory video, Mary sits back, exhausted but somewhat satisfied. Just as she starts to feel a sense of accomplishment, she receives a message from Vince. Reading his words of disappointment and reluctance to support her concert, she feels a sharp sting of betrayal. The scene ends with Mary holding her phone, tears welling up as she teeters between giving up and pushing forward, leaving the audience in suspense about her next move.
Essence: Mary prepares for her concert by making promotional videos.
Conflict: Mary’s determination to succeed versus her emotional turmoil.
Subtext: Mary’s need to prove herself through her career.
Hope/Fear: We hope the videos will help her concert. We fear her efforts will be in vain.
43 INT. ELDERLY HOME, DOUBLE ROOM – NIGHT
Robert comes back and proposes that Mary retire gracefully, offering financial support. Mary is devastated, saying artists don’t retire, they just die. Robert points out that she doesn’t even have a location for the show yet.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Robert enters the room, hesitating before he begins to speak. He softly suggests that Mary should consider retiring gracefully and offers financial support to help her through this transition. His tone is gentle, but the impact on Mary is profound.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Mary is devastated by Robert’s suggestion. She struggles to hold back tears as she explains that artists don’t retire; they just die. Her voice trembles with emotion, and the weight of her words hangs heavily in the air. Robert looks confused, failing to grasp the depth of Mary’s attachment to her career.
End: (Reveal) Robert, trying to be practical, points out that Mary doesn’t even have a location for her show yet. This stings Mary deeply, highlighting the logistical challenges she still faces and intensifying her sense of desperation and isolation. The scene ends with Mary sitting in silence, overwhelmed by the seeming impossibility of her dreams and Robert’s lack of understanding.
Essence: Robert suggests Mary retire, misunderstanding her need to perform.
Conflict: Mary’s need to perform versus Robert’s offer of financial support.
Subtext: The deep misunderstanding between Mary and Robert about her career and identity.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary can convey her passion for performing to Robert. We fear this suggestion will hurt their relationship.
ACT 3
3.1. RETHINKING
Scene Arc: From Mary renting the concert space from Dieter to facing the setback of a negative article.
44 INT. CONCERT CLUB, OFFICE – DAY
Mary meets Dieter to rent the concert club. Dieter is skeptical about Mary’s ability to afford the rental fee. Mary calls Robert to confirm financial support, but Robert refuses to pay for the concert bar. Determined, Mary decides to save money by going to the cheaper hairdresser at the elderly home instead of her usual expensive salon.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mary enters Dieter's office, her determination clear despite the tension in the air. She confidently explains her plans for the concert and expresses her desire to rent the club. Dieter listens, but his skepticism is evident.
Middle: (Betrayal) Dieter questions Mary’s ability to afford the rental fee, casting doubt on her financial stability. Mary, feeling the pressure, calls Robert to confirm financial support. The room is silent as she waits for his response, but her hope is shattered when Robert refuses to pay for the concert bar.
End: (Surprise) Determined not to give up, Mary decides to make personal sacrifices. She tells Dieter she will save money by going to the cheaper hairdresser at the elderly home instead of her usual expensive salon, demonstrating her commitment and resourcefulness. Dieter, seeing her determination, remains skeptical but intrigued, leaving the outcome uncertain as Mary steps out of the office, resolved to find a way.
Essence: Mary negotiates with Dieter to rent the concert club and seeks financial support from Robert, ultimately deciding to make personal sacrifices to secure the venue.
Conflict: Dieter is uncertain if Mary can afford the rental fee, and Robert refuses to support Mary’s rental financially, leaving her to find a solution.
Subtext: Mary’s determination to prove herself and secure a venue for her comeback despite financial constraints and lack of support from her son.
Hope/Fear: We hope Dieter agrees to rent the club to Mary despite financial concerns. We fear Robert’s refusal will jeopardize her plans. We hope Mary’s decision to save money helps her secure the venue. We fear it might not be enough.
Not to forget: Mary suggests if concert goes well, it’s proof she can be back on stage.
45 INT. ELDERLY HOME, MARY’S ROOM – NIGHT
Mary reads an article by Faye in the local newspaper that trashes her social media presence and implies that the upcoming show might not meet expectations.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary sits in her room, eagerly flipping through the local newspaper, searching for the article by Faye. Her anticipation quickly turns to dismay as she reads the harsh critique of her social media presence, the words stinging like a personal attack.
Middle: (Surprise) As Mary reads further, the article implies that her upcoming show might not meet expectations. The revelation hits her hard, and her initial confidence begins to waver. The room feels smaller, the walls closing in as she processes the criticism.
End: (Suspense) Mary puts down the newspaper, her mind racing. She struggles internally, questioning whether she should continue pushing forward or give in to the doubts now clouding her thoughts. The scene ends with Mary staring out the window, caught in a moment of deep reflection and uncertainty.
Essence: Mary faces a setback with the negative article about her social media presence.
Conflict: Mary’s confidence is shaken by the negative article.
Subtext: The challenges and opposition Mary faces in her comeback journey.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary can overcome this setback. We fear it might derail her plans.
Scene Arc: From Mary Refusing to Perform at Elderly Home to Having All Tickets Sold
46 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLACID’S OFFICE – DAY
Crisis conference with Placid, Vince, and Robert offer Mary the multipurpose room for her concert to help her after the negative article and save a lot of money. Mary refuses, stating she wants a "real" audience and not to play for the elderly and children. Mary leaves the room determined to go ahead with her original plan.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary sits in Placid's office, facing Placid, Vince, and Robert, who are all visibly concerned about her. The room is tense as Placid begins the discussion, proposing the use of the multipurpose room for her concert as a way to mitigate the damage from the negative article and save money.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) As Placid explains the benefits, Mary’s face shows a mixture of frustration and determination. Vince and Robert chime in, emphasizing the financial and practical advantages. Mary’s internal struggle is evident as she considers their points but remains steadfast in her desire for a "real" audience.
End: (Cliffhanger) Mary, with a resolute expression, stands up and firmly rejects the offer, stating that she wants to perform for a genuine audience, not just the residents and children. She leaves the room with a determined stride, leaving Placid, Vince, and Robert stunned and worried about the consequences of her decision. The scene closes on the uncertain expressions of the three men, hinting at the challenges Mary will face moving forward.
Essence: Mary rejects the offer of the multipurpose room, insisting on performing for a "real" audience.
Conflict: Mary’s determination to perform for a "real" audience versus Placid, Vince, and Robert’s attempt to help her.
Subtext: Mary’s desperation to reclaim her career and not settle for less.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s determination will lead to success. We fear her refusal might isolate her further.
47 INT. ELDERLY HOME, OFFICE – DAY
After Mary left, Robert and Vince insist that Placid help them prevent Mary from performing, trying to stop her from rehearsing.
Beginning: (Surprise) After Mary storms out, Robert and Vince stay behind, visibly concerned. They turn to Placid, explaining their fears for Mary’s well-being and urging him to help them stop her from going through with the concert.
Middle: (Uncertainty) Placid listens as Robert and Vince express their worries. Placid, torn between his duty to support the residents and his understanding of Mary’s fierce independence, finds himself in an awkward position. The tension in the room grows as he considers their request.
End: (Suspense) Placid, with a thoughtful expression, promises to think about their concerns but doesn’t give a definitive answer. He knows how much the concert means to Mary. The scene ends with Placid contemplating his next move, leaving Robert and Vince uncertain about whether their intervention will succeed.
Essence: Robert and Vince attempt to prevent Mary from performing by seeking Placid’s help
Conflict: Robert and Vince’s protective instincts versus Mary’s determination.
Subtext: The struggle between Mary’s autonomy and the protective efforts of those around her.
Hope/Fear: We hope Placid will find a way to support Mary. We fear their interference might derail her plans.
48 INT. ELDERLY HOME, CORRIDOR TO KITCHEN – NIGHT
Placid stays late at the elderly home, searching for where Mary is rehearsing. He finds the kitchen and is surprised by how many residents are outside in the corridor, enjoying Mary’s rehearsal without her knowing. Placid is hesitant—should he stop Mary or continue to support her in his own way? To everybody’s surprise: Placid starts dancing (a bit like Christopher Walken in "Weapon of Choice"), and the elderly are amazed.
Beginning: (Intrigue) Placid stays late at the elderly home, searching for where Mary is rehearsing. He hears music and follows the sound to the kitchen, his curiosity piqued.
Middle: (Surprise) Placid finds the kitchen and is surprised by how many residents are outside in the corridor, enjoying Mary’s rehearsal without her knowing. Their quiet enjoyment and smiles move him, revealing the positive impact Mary’s music has on them.
End: (Character Changes Radically) Placid, hesitant at first, decides to join in. To everybody’s surprise, he starts dancing (a bit like Christopher Walken in "Weapon of Choice"), and the elderly are amazed. His unexpected dance supports Mary’s efforts and shows his shift from skepticism to enthusiastic support, leaving the residents delighted and creating a sense of unity.
Essence: Placid discovers the positive impact of Mary’s rehearsals on the residents and decides to support her in his own way.
Conflict: Placid’s hesitation to support Mary openly versus the evident joy of the residents.
Subtext: Placid’s internal conflict about supporting Mary’s efforts and his shift from skepticism to support.
Hope/Fear: We hope Placid will see the value in Mary’s performance. We fear he will still try to stop her. We hope Placid’s support will encourage Mary. We fear his hesitation might still hold him back.
49 INT. ELDERLY HOME, MARY’S ROOM – DAY
Mary gets the news from Dieter that all the tickets are sold.
Beginning: (Surprise) Mary is in her room, going over her plans and rehearsals, when she receives a phone call from Dieter. The tension is palpable as she answers, unsure of what to expect.
Middle: (Reveal) Dieter informs Mary that all the tickets for her concert are sold out. Mary is initially stunned, her eyes widening in disbelief as the news sinks in. The weight of her doubts begins to lift.
End: (Mystery) Mary, still in shock, asks Dieter how this happened. Dieter, slightly evasive, gives an aleatory answer about word-of-mouth and interest in her comeback, leaving Mary intrigued and puzzled.
Essence: Mary learns that all the tickets for her concert are sold.
Conflict: Mary’s initial doubts versus the overwhelming support she receives.
Subtext: The validation of Mary’s efforts and determination.
Hope/Fear: We hope this news boosts Mary’s confidence. We fear she might still face obstacles ahead.
3.2. NEW PLAN
Scene Arc: From Mary Doing Final Rehearsals to Realizing That Placid Bought All the Tickets
50 INT. ELDERLY HOME, ENRIQUE'S REHAB – DAY
Mary rehearses with Enrique, including a costume selection. Mary is annoyed by her Marlene-wig.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, dressed in her Marlene Dietrich costume, stands in front of the mirror, fussing with the wig. Her frustration is palpable as she struggles to make it look right.
Middle: (Misinterpretation) Enrique suggests a minor adjustment to the routine to accommodate the wig, but Mary misinterprets his advice as a critique of her performance. The tension between them escalates as Mary snaps back, insisting that everything must be perfect. This misunderstanding heightens the stakes, showcasing Mary’s anxiety and determination.
End: (Internal Dilemma) Enrique, sensing Mary’s growing frustration, suggests she get her hair done by the hairdresser in the Marlene style. Mary hesitates, torn between her desire for perfection and her need to manage within her current limitations. The scene ends with Mary considering Enrique’s suggestion, highlighting her internal struggle to balance her ambitions with practical solutions.
Essence: Mary prepares for her concert with Enrique’s help, expressing her annoyance with the wig.
Conflict: Mary’s determination to perfect her performance versus the need for a flawless appearance.
Subtext: Mary’s dedication to her comeback and her anxiety about every detail being perfect.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s rehearsal goes smoothly. We fear something will go wrong with her preparations.
51 INT. ELDERLY HOME, HAIRDRESSER – DAY
Mary goes to the in-house hairdresser to get the perfect blonde Marlene hair instead of the wig. The hairdresser does something wrong. We see Mary and the hairdresser’s shocking reaction but not what it is. As a solution to hide the catastrophe, Mary puts back on the Marlene-wig.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, for the first time not at her usual hairdresser, sits in the hairdresser’s chair, explaining exactly how she wants her hair to look like Marlene Dietrich’s iconic style. The hairdresser listens intently, trying to reassure Mary despite her own nervousness.
Middle: (Suspense) As the hairdresser works, Mary’s anxiety grows. She keeps checking the mirror, her fingers tapping nervously on the armrest. The tension builds as the hairdresser makes the final touches. Mary senses something is off but tries to remain calm.
End: (Character Changes Radically) The hairdresser steps back, revealing her work. The camera shows Mary’s horrified reaction as she sees her hair dyed a shocking purple instead of the desired blonde. The audience is shown the disastrous result briefly. Desperate to fix the mistake, Mary hurriedly puts the Marlene-wig back on, hiding the purple hair. The scene ends with Mary staring at herself in the mirror, visibly shaken but determined to move forward despite the setback.
Essence: Mary seeks to complete her look with the perfect hairstyle, but the hairdresser’s mistake leads to a desperate search for a solution.
Conflict: The hairdresser’s attempt to achieve the perfect look versus the possibility of making a mistake and Mary’s increasing anxiety.
Subtext: Mary’s need for perfection and the pressure she puts on herself, struggling with unexpected setbacks and her fear of not being perfect.
Hope/Fear: We hope the hairdresser succeeds in giving Mary the perfect hairstyle. We fear the hairdresser will make a mistake and Mary’s appearance will be ruined.
3.3. HUGE FAILURE
52 INT. ELDERLY HOME, HORTENSE'S ROOM – DAY
Mary goes to Hortense to cry about the hair disaster. But Hortense, in bad shape, says it’s her last wish to see Mary perform. Mary discovers a ticket to her concert on Hortense’s night table. Hortense tells Mary that Placid bought tickets for everyone in the elderly home.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, distressed by her hair disaster, rushes to Hortense’s room, tears streaming down her face. She breaks down, seeking comfort and reassurance from her old friend.
Middle: (Character changes radically) Hortense, in a much worse condition than before, barely speaks. She doesn't even ask the usual question about if Mary has "Family," highlighting her deteriorating state.
End: (Mystery B) Mary discovers a ticket to her show on Hortense's night table. Hortense, mustering her strength, reveals that it's her last wish to see Mary perform. Mary, confused and emotional, asks how Hortense got the ticket. Hortense reveals that Placid bought tickets for everyone in the elderly home. The revelation adds a layer of mystery and depth to the support Mary has received, leaving her both touched and determined.
Essence: Mary seeks comfort from Hortense after the hair disaster and discovers that Placid bought all the tickets. Hortense is in bad shape.
Conflict: Mary’s need for emotional support versus Hortense’s declining health.
Subtext: Mary’s vulnerability and the comfort she finds in Hortense’s presence. The truth behind the sold-out concert.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary finds solace in Hortense. We fear Hortense’s health will worsen.
Scene Arc: From Mary Attempting to Cancel the Concert to Hortense's Death.
53 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLAZA – DAY
Mary calls Dieter to cancel the concert. Dieter refuses because he is happy to have a sold-out house and suggests her program might be a success for other elderly homes as well.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary, feeling overwhelmed and doubting her ability to perform, nervously dials Dieter's number. The phone call’s anticipation heightens her anxiety.
Middle: (Surprise) Dieter answers with enthusiasm, expressing his delight over the sold-out concert. Mary, hesitant and stumbling over her words, tries to explain her desire to cancel the show. Dieter cuts her off, emphasizing the importance of the sold-out status and his belief in her program's potential success.
End: (Internal Dilemma) Dieter suggests that if her concert is successful, it could be a hit in other elderly homes as well, adding more pressure on Mary. Mary, taken aback by his confidence and the new possibility, ends the call in a state of uncertainty, leaving the audience wondering how she will handle the added pressure and whether she will go through with the performance.
Essence: Mary attempts to cancel the concert but faces resistance from Dieter.
Conflict: Mary’s desire to cancel the concert versus Dieter’s insistence on keeping the sold-out show.
Subtext: Mary’s doubts and fears about the concert’s success and her ability to perform.
Hope/Fear: We hope Dieter’s encouragement will reassure Mary. We fear his refusal might increase her anxiety.
54 INT. ELDERLY HOME, KITCHEN – DAY
Mary sneaks into the kitchen, where Julia hides her drinks. Mary contemplates taking a bottle and eventually gets the bottle.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary sneaks into the kitchen, her eyes darting around nervously. She approaches the cabinet where Julia hides her drinks, the tension building as she contemplates her next move.
Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Mary reaches for a bottle, her hands trembling. Just as she’s about to take it, Julia enters the kitchen, catching Mary in the act. Julia’s face registers a mix of shock and concern.
End: (Uncertainty) Mary, caught between her desperation and her resolve to stay sober, hesitates. Julia steps forward, trying to gently take the bottle from her. Mary clutches it tightly, her internal struggle evident. The scene ends with Mary’s grip loosening, tears welling up in her eyes, leaving the audience in suspense about whether she will give in to the temptation or find the strength to resist.
Essence: Mary struggles with the temptation of alcohol as a coping mechanism.
Conflict: Mary’s need to stay sober versus the temptation to drink.
Subtext: Mary’s internal battle with her past dependence on alcohol and her current stress.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary resists the temptation. We fear she might relapse.
55 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLAZA – DAY
On her way back to her room, Sophie throws a ball at her. Mary is apathetic and does not really respond. Sophie mentions she is also coming to the concert tomorrow, along with some other kids. Mary freezes.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) On her way back to her room, Mary walks slowly, lost in thought, the bottle of alcohol weighing heavily in her bag. Sophie, full of energy, throws a ball at Mary, trying to engage her in play. Mary’s apathy is evident as she barely responds, her mind preoccupied with her internal struggle.
Middle: (Reveal) Sophie, noticing Mary’s unusual behavior, mentions casually that she and some other kids are coming to Mary’s concert tomorrow. Mary freezes at Sophie’s words, the weight of her influence on Sophie and the other children suddenly hitting her.
End: (Suspense) Mary stands motionless, torn between the bottle in her bag and the responsibility she feels towards Sophie and the children. The scene ends with Mary staring at Sophie, her face a mix of shock and realization, leaving the audience in suspense about whether she will succumb to her temptation or find the strength to be a role model.
Essence: Mary’s struggle with her decision to drink and the impact of Sophie’s words.
Conflict: Mary’s internal conflict about drinking versus her concern for Sophie’s expectations.
Subtext: Mary’s awareness of the influence she has on Sophie and the importance of being a role model.
Hope/Fear: We hope Sophie’s words will dissuade Mary from drinking. We fear Mary’s apathy might lead her to make a poor decision.
56 INT. ELDERLY HOME, MARY’S ROOM – NIGHT
Just as Mary is about to take a drink in her room, she realizes that Hortense has died. The shock causes her to drop the bottle, which gets destroyed as it hits the floor.
Beginning: (Suspense) Mary returns to her room, carrying the bottle of alcohol. She notices Hortense lying silently in bed, but she doesn't say anything. The eerie quietness heightens the tension as Mary moves to her own space.
Middle: (Major twist) Mary, feeling the weight of her struggles, finally raises the bottle to her lips. She glances at Hortense and, sensing something is wrong, goes to check on her. Mary realizes that Hortense has passed away, the shock hitting her like a physical blow.
End: (Cliffhanger) In her disbelief, Mary drops the bottle, and it shatters on the floor. The reality of Hortense’s death sinks in, bringing a sudden and sobering clarity. Mary’s eyes fill with tears, leaving the audience in suspense about her next move.
Essence: Mary is confronted with Hortense’s death at a critical moment, leading to an emotional grounding and recovery.
Conflict: Mary’s intention to drink versus the shock of Hortense’s death.
Subtext: The sudden confrontation with mortality and its impact on Mary’s perspective.
Hope/Fear: We hope Hortense’s death will serve as a wake-up call for Mary. We fear the emotional toll it will take on her.
ACT 4
4.1. CLIMAX
Scene Arc: From Refusing to Perform for the Elderly to Deciding to Perform
57 INT. ELDERLY HOME, PLACID’S OFFICE – DAY
Mary tells Placid she can’t perform. Placid insists she must because death is part of life and emphasizes the positive impact her rehearsals have had on the residents. He reveals that Robert and Vince wanted to stop her from performing and that he bought the tickets himself, believing in the importance of her art. He shares his own backstory about being prevented from pursuing his passions due to being too small and wants to ensure Mary doesn’t suffer similarly. Outraged to learn Robert and Vince were behind Faye’s article, Mary must choose between giving up or proving her worth. She decides to prove them wrong.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary enters Placid’s office, her face marked with grief and exhaustion. She tells Placid she can’t perform, her voice breaking as she explains the emotional toll of Hortense’s death.
Middle: (Mystery C) Placid listens intently, then insists she must perform. He emphasizes that death is part of life and shares how her rehearsals have positively impacted the residents. He reveals that Robert and Vince tried to stop her from performing, and that he bought the tickets himself, believing in the importance of her art. Placid shares his own story about being prevented from pursuing his passions due to his small stature, expressing his desire to ensure Mary doesn’t suffer similarly.
End: (Character changes radically) Outraged to learn Robert and Vince were behind Faye’s article, Mary faces a critical decision. Her initial despair transforms into a fierce determination as she decides to prove them wrong. She leaves Placid’s office with a newfound resolve, determined to make her performance a success.
Essence: Mary struggles with the idea of performing, while Placid insists on the importance of her art for the elderly.
Conflict: Mary’s reluctance to perform versus Placid’s insistence on the significance of her performance.
Subtext: The deeper connection between life, death, and the importance of art in enriching
lives.
Hope/Fear: We hope Placid’s words will resonate with Mary. We fear Mary will continue to refuse.
58 INT. ELDERLY HOME, MARY’S ROOM – NIGHT
Sophie, feeling neglected by Mary, looks for her and sneaks into her room. She finds Hortense’s denture glass empty, indicating she has taken it. Sophie exchanges Mary’s show clothes, following Mary’s earlier advice that surprising people is always effective.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Sophie, feeling neglected and alone, wanders through the elderly home, searching for Mary. She sneaks into Mary’s room, her movements cautious and quiet.
Middle: (Intrigue) As Sophie looks around the room, she notices Hortense’s denture in the glass, but Hortense is not there. In a bid to connect with Mary and perhaps get her attention, Sophie mischievously exchanges Mary’s show clothes and swaps the contents of Mary’s makeup wallet with the denture.
End: (Cliffhanger) Sophie sneaks out of the room, leaving the audience wondering how Mary will react to the changes and what impact it will have on their relationship.
Essence: Sophie’s actions reflect her understanding of Mary’s advice and her own need for connection.
Conflict: Sophie’s feelings of neglect versus her desire to connect with Mary.
Subtext: The impact of Mary’s actions on those around her and the importance of meaningful connections.
Hope/Fear: We hope Sophie’s actions bring her closer to Mary. We fear this might create more tension
Scene Arc: From Mary Preparing Backstage to Performing Without Costumes in the Dark
59 INT. CONCERT CLUB, BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
Mary gets ready backstage, just like at the beginning of the story. She wants to put on her Marlene Dietrich performance clothes but realizes they have been exchanged. Vince comes to wish Mary good luck and notices her distress. Mary asks Vince to cut the electricity to avoid being seen without her proper costume. Vince says that means that there will be no music.
Beginning: (Major Twist) Mary gets ready backstage, mirroring the beginning of the story. She opens her wardrobe to put on her Marlene Dietrich performance clothes but realizes they have been exchanged. Her distress is immediate and palpable.
Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Vince comes to wish Mary good luck and notices her distress. Mary, on the verge of panic, explains the wardrobe disaster and pleads with Vince to cut the electricity to avoid being seen without her proper costume. The tension rises as Vince processes her request.
End: (Internal Dilemma) Vince, torn between helping Mary and the technical implications of cutting the electricity, hesitates. He finally tells Mary that cutting the electricity would also mean there will be no music. The scene ends with Mary’s desperate and anxious expression, leaving the audience in suspense about what will happen next.
Essence: Mary faces an unexpected wardrobe crisis and seeks a desperate solution.
Conflict: Mary’s need to be perfectly dressed for her performance versus the reality of her clothes being exchanged and the technical challenge of cutting electricity.
Subtext: The pressure of meeting expectations and the fear of failure. Mary’s reliance on external appearances to validate her talent.
Hope/Fear: We hope Vince can help Mary find a solution. We fear cutting the electricity might create more problems and ruin the show.
60 INT. CONCERT CLUB, STAGE – NIGHT
In the dark, Mary stands on the stage and announces she will perform a cappella because there is no current. Vince goes to the piano to accompany her. They perform together.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) In the dark, Mary stands on the stage, her heart pounding. She gathers her courage and announces to the audience that she will perform a cappella because there is no current. The audience murmurs in surprise, creating a tense atmosphere.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Vince, sensing Mary’s vulnerability, goes to the piano. Despite the lack of electricity, he begins to play, providing a soft, acoustic accompaniment. The audience, initially skeptical, starts to quiet down, focusing on Mary and Vince.
End: (Reveal) As they perform together, Mary’s voice shines, her confidence growing with each note. The audience, captivated by the raw and intimate performance, responds with heartfelt applause. Mary realizes that her talent and connection with the audience are more powerful than any technical support, marking a triumphant and emotional moment.
Essence: Mary’s performance becomes a testament to her raw talent and resilience.
Conflict: Mary’s initial fear and vulnerability versus her eventual strength and adaptability. The challenge of performing without technical support.
Subtext: The power of inner strength and the ability to turn challenges into opportunities. Mary’s realization that her talent is enough.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s a cappella performance will be well-received. We fear the audience might not appreciate the impromptu change.
Scene Arc: From Mary Being Marlene to Becoming Mary
61 INT. CONCERT CLUB, BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
Mary is in her element. Robert, watching from backstage, decides to turn the power back on to fully reveal Mary to the audience, showing his support for her true self.
Beginning: (Surprise) Mary is in her element on stage, performing with confidence and grace. Robert watches from backstage, his face reflecting a mix of pride and realization.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Overwhelmed by Mary’s talent and determination, Robert decides to turn the power back on. His action is a symbolic gesture of support, showing that he believes in her true self and her abilities.
End: (Suspense) The lights and sound system suddenly come back to life, fully illuminating Mary on stage. The audience gasps in surprise, and Mary hesitates for a split second, unsure of what just happened. Then, seeing Robert’s encouraging smile from backstage, she embraces the moment, continuing her performance with even more energy and passion. The scene ends with Mary shining brightly under the spotlight, fully supported by Robert’s gesture.
Essence: Robert acknowledges Mary’s dedication and takes action to support her.
Conflict: Robert’s initial skepticism versus his newfound understanding and support for Mary.
Subtext: The shift from doubt to support, highlighting the power of belief in someone’s potential.
Hope/Fear: We hope Robert’s decision to turn the power back on will enhance Mary’s performance. We fear it might disrupt the flow and surprise Mary.
62 INT. CONCERT CLUB, STAGE – NIGHT
The lights come on, and everyone sees Mary in her usual clothes, with no make-up. Mary is initially shocked. Mary takes off her Marlene wig, revealing her purple hair. The audience, now seeing her true self, cheers even louder, screaming her name, "Mary!"
Beginning: (Surprise) The lights come on, revealing Mary in her usual clothes with no make-up. She is initially shocked, her vulnerability laid bare before the audience.
Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Gathering her courage, Mary takes off her Marlene wig, revealing her purple hair. The audience, taken aback at first, begins to cheer louder, appreciating her bravery and authenticity.
End: (Reveal) The cheers turn into a powerful chant of her name, “Mary!” The support and enthusiasm of the audience fill Mary with a renewed sense of confidence and validation. She embraces the moment, realizing that her true self is enough and deeply appreciated. The scene ends with Mary basking in the adoration of the crowd, symbolizing her triumph over her insecurities and external pressures.
Essence: Mary’s true self is celebrated and embraced by the audience.
Conflict: Mary’s initial shock and vulnerability versus her inner strength and dedication to her art.
Subtext: The triumph of inner beauty and talent over external appearances.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary’s decision to continue will resonate with the audience. We fear she might lose confidence and falter.
Scene Arc: From Mary Craving Applause to Stage Diving and Feeling Supported
4.2. RESOLUTION
63 INT. CONCERT CLUB, STAGE – NIGHT
Mary is performing and reveling in the applause. Then Mary tells the audience to stop applauding and put their hands up. Mary stands at the edge of the stage and does a stage dive.
Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Mary is performing and reveling in the applause. She takes a moment to soak it all in, but something seems to be missing.
Middle: (Surprise) Mary, suddenly feeling a surge of bravery and desire for a real connection, tells the audience to stop applauding and put their hands up. The audience is momentarily confused but follows her lead, raising their hands in the air.
End: (Cliffhanger) Standing at the edge of the stage, Mary takes a deep breath and does a stage dive. The scene ends with Mary suspended in mid-air, leaving the audience and viewers in suspense, wondering if the crowd will catch her and embrace her bold move.
Essence: Mary seeks deeper connection beyond applause, making a bold move to engage with the audience.
Conflict: Mary’s desire for genuine connection versus the audience’s initial expectation of a traditional performance.
Subtext: The emptiness of superficial validation and the courage to seek true support.
Hope/Fear: We hope the audience understands and supports her. We fear they might be confused or disengaged.
64 INT. CONCERT CLUB, STAGE – NIGHT
Mary is caught by the audience and everybody who is dear to her: Robert, Vince, Placid, Sophie, Dieter, Enrique, the elderly, etc. The audience is holding her up and letting her float, providing true support and connection.
Beginning: (Surprise) As Mary dives off the stage, the audience collectively reaches out, catching her. The tension breaks as she realizes she is safely in their hands.
Middle: (Character changes radically) Among the crowd holding her up are Robert, Vince, Placid, Sophie, Dieter, Enrique, and the elderly residents. Each face shows genuine joy and support, illustrating the deep connections Mary has formed.
End: (Resolution) The audience, with all those dear to Mary, lets her float above them, providing true support and connection. Mary’s face lights up with a mix of relief, joy, and gratitude, feeling the validation and support she had longed for, as the scene ends on a high note of unity and fulfillment.
Essence: Mary experiences true support and connection from her audience.
Conflict: Mary’s initial fear of rejection versus the overwhelming support from the audience.
Subtext: The fulfillment that comes from genuine human connection and support.
Hope/Fear: We hope Mary feels validated and supported. We fear the moment might not last.

[Jan Westbrook]

Jan’s Character Fascinating Scene Outlines!

My Vision: I am a talented and strong writer with a unique voice, recognized by the movie industry with multiple screenplays produced.

What I learned from this assignment was going through the interest techniques identified some scenes that were not necessary, or could be combined to raise the stakes.

SCENE 1: INT. GEODE CAVE -DAY
Scene Arc: from queen’s council discussing the prophecy of the halo-moon cycle ending to Emberleaf seeing a hazy image of the one who will betray her as the dark forces start toward Eveandor
Essence: getting a sense of the world of Eveandor and the threats it holds for Emberleaf and Eveandor
Conflict: Emberleaf’s knowledge that someone will betray her, threatening the land of Eveandor
Subtext: Emberleaf refuses to believe the prophecy will come true
Hope/fear: the queen’s council can stop the prophecy from coming true/Emberleaf will take the visions seriously

BEGINNING: (intrigue) The queens of the council meet in the geode cave
MIDDLE: (mislead) they drink of the sacred tea, see the prophecy coming true before the halo-moon cycle ends
ENDING: (misinterpretation) Emberleaf sees an unclear image of the one the mirror water foretells will betray her

SCENE 2 : INT. QUEEN’S TRAINING ROOM -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf sparring to having Khyber-Ra using forbidden dark magic on her
Essence: Khyber-Ra uses dark magic taking the sparring match too seriously
Conflict: Emberleaf sparring and Khyber-Ra acting like it is a real fight
Subtext: he knows dark magic
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will not be harmed/Khyber-Ra will be punished for using dark magic

BEGINNING: (suspense) Emberleaf and Khyber-Ra are sparring, Khyber-Ra giving Emberleaf pointers to make her magic more direct and forceful
MIDDLE: (major twist, surprise) Emberleaf backs Khyber-Ra into a corner, pleased she learned new move
ENDING: (betrayal, cliffhanger) Khyber-Ra strikes Emberleaf down using forbidden dark magic

SCENE 3: INT. EMBERLEAF’S CHAMBERS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf indecision to her banishing Khyber-Ra from Eveandor
Essence: Khyber-Ra is banished from Eveandor
Conflict: Emberleaf’s struggle to banish her unity partner from Eveandor
Subtext: now I will not be able to bear offspring
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will show leniency/Khyber-Ra will be banished from Eveandor

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)the queens council convenes to determine the fate of Khyber-Ra
MIDDLE: (external/internal dilemma)Emberleaf argues he is her unity partner and without him, she will bear no offspring
ENDING: (uncertainty)Emberleaf is forced to either banish Khyber-Ra or relinquish her queendom

SCENE 4: EXT. SHADOWLANDS -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra being alone to returning to Eveandor
Essence: Khyber-Ra’s master (M’Mranth-Jix) wants him to get the numinous amulet
Conflict: how can Khyber-Ra get the amulet when he is banished from Eveandor
Subtext: I will find a way to get the amulet
Hope/fear: Khyber-Ra does not obey his master/Khyber-Ra will obey his master

BEGINNING: (more interesting setting, mislead)Khyber-Ra exits through a portal at the edge of the shadowlands
MIDDLE: (reveal, misinterpretation) he is confronted by his master, M’Mranth-Jix, to get the numinous amulet
ENDING: (mystery, suspense)M’Mranth-Jix opens two portals and Khyber-Ra must choose which one to step through

SCENE 5: EXT. ROCKY FIELDS OF EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra changing his appearance, to him getting inside Emberleaf’s castle
Essence: Khyber-Ra does not want to be recognized
Conflict: will he or will he not be recognized
Subtext: this will get me into Emberleaf’s castle
Hope/fear: Khyber-Ra gets caught/Khyber-Ra will be undetected

BEGINNING: (more interesting setting, character changes radically, mystery) Khyber-Ra steps into Eveandor, changes his appearance
MIDDLE: (superior position, uncertainty)Khyber-Ra stopped by guards, manipulates them and continues to the castle
ENDING: (superior position)he goes up to Emberleaf’s castle and is met by Lightthistle

SCENE 6: INT. QUEEN’S TRAINING ROOM -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf being hopeful the wanderer, who is Khyber-Ra, will be a replacement magic trainer to dismissing him
Essence: Khyber-Ra, as the wanderer auditions for the role of magic trainer
Conflict: Khyber-Ra, as the wander wanting Emberleaf to take him on as magic trainer
Subtext: when I get this, will be closer to getting the numinous amulet
Hope/fear: Khyber-Ra, as the wanderer, will not get chosen as the magic trainer/Emberleaf will be duped and take him on as her magic trainer

BEGINNING: (superior position, uncomfortable moment, mislead)Lightthistle introduces the wanderer to Emberleaf and she immediately throws a spell at him which he counters with ease
MIDDLE: (superior position, suspense, cliffhanger)they spar, getting more intense, and Emberleaf concluding the sparring session
ENDING: (superior position, major twist, surprise)she consults Lightthistle, who does not support the decision and she lets Khyber-Ra go

SCENE 7: INT. EMBERLEAF’S THRONE ROOM -DAY
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra revealing himself to getting Emberleaf to lead him to the numinous amulet
Essence: Khyber-Ra gets Emberleaf to take him to the numinous amulet
Conflict: will Emberleaf be able to fend off Khyber-Ra
Subtext: my master will be proud of me when I bring him the numinous amulet
Hope/fear: Emberleaf and Lightthistle can stop Khyber-Ra/Khyber-Ra will get the numinous amulet

BEGINNING: (reveal, character changes radically)Khyber-Ra reveals himself to Emberleaf
MIDDLE: (internal dilemma)she is emotional that Khyber-Ra came back, but must banish him again
ENDING: (major twist, betrayal)Khyber-Ra forces her to lead him to the numinous amulet

SCENE 8: INT. NUMINOUS AMULET CHAMBER -DAY
Scene Arc: from the numinous amulet safe in the chamber to it being shattered and scattered throughout the realm
Essence: Khyber-Ra shatters the numinous amulet
Conflict: Khyber-Ra cannot grab the numinous amulet, but does and it shatters
Subtext: now I’ve got the numinous amulet
Hope/fear: Khyber-Ra will not get the numinous amulet/Emberleaf and Lightthistle will not be able to protect the numinous amulet

BEGINNING: (suspense, betrayal)Lightthistle defends the numinous amulet from Emberleaf is under Khyber-Ra’s spell
MIDDLE: (suspense, uncertainty)Emberleaf breaks the spell, and creates a banishment portal to banish Khyber-Ra again
ENDING: (surprise, cliffhanger)Khyber-Ra grabs the amulet and it shatters, and it goes through the banishment portal.

SCENE 9: EXT. SHADOWLANDS -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from M’Mranth-Jix anticipating Khyber-Ra giving him the numinous amulet to being furious he touched it and it shattered
Essence: M’Mranth-Jix is frustrated at Khyber-Ra’s ignorance at touching the numinous amulet
Conflict: Khyber-Ra wants to give the numinous amulet to M’Mranth-Jix but cannot
Subtext: the realization his plan for taking over Eveandor is ruined
Hope/fear: M’Mranth-Jix will not severely punish Khyber-Ra/Khyber-Ra will be feel M’Mranth-Jix’s wrath

BEGINNING: (superior position)M’Mranth-Jix watches Khyber-Ra get into the numinous amulet chamber
MIDDLE: (suspense)he amasses the dark creatures around him in anticipation of invading Eveandor
ENDING: (character changes radically, uncertainty)when the numinous amulet is shattered, he opens a portal and pulls Khyber-Ra through, holds him in a dark magic spell

SCENE 10: INT. GEODE CAVE -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf seeking protection from the queen’s council to her having to venture out into the realm, defenseless to restore the numinous amulet
Essence: it is decided that Emberleaf must restore the numinous amulet herself
Conflict: Emberleaf has no magic to defend herself in the realm, but must venture out anyway
Subtext: she will most likely die if she does not have protection
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will be protected by the queen’s council/a vulnerable and defenseless Emberleaf will have to venture out into the realm to get the numinous amulet fragments

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, character changes radically)Emberleaf is basically lifeless on her throne in the Geode cave
MIDDLE: (suspense, uncertainty)the queens gather and use the mirror water. Emberleaf must collect the numinous amulet fragments herself
ENDING: (surprise, uncertainty)All three vanish from the geode cave, leaving Emberleaf slumped on her throne

SCENE 11: INT. QUEEN AMBERLIGHT’S CHAMBER -DAY
Scene Arc: from Queen Amberlight’s ambivalence to deciding to pick Willowbreeze to be part of the Pixie alliance to protect Emberleaf
Essence: choosing Willowbreeze for the Pixie alliance
Conflict: who of her subjects to choose for the Pixie alliance
Subtext: I hope I am making the correct choice
Hope/fear: Willowbreeze is the right choice/Queen Amberlight is making the wrong choice

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, superior position, mislead)Amberlight assembles her pixie subjects
MIDDLE: (suspense)she eliminates candidates until she is down to Willowbreeze and Echoheart
ENDING: (reveal, uncomfortable moment)she chooses Willowbreeze and they vanish in a magical explosion

SCENE 12: INT. QUEEN BLADESONG’S ATRIUM -DAY
Scene Arc: from Thornwhisper being resistant, to agreeing to being a part of the Pixie alliance to protect Emberleaf
Essence: Thornwhisper’s reluctance to joining the Pixie alliance
Conflict: how can I convince Thornwhisper to join the alliance
Subtext:
Hope/fear: Thornwhisper agrees to be a part of the alliance/Queen Bladesong is forcing Thornwhisper against his will to be part of the alliance

BEGINNING: (superior position)Bladesong approaches Thornwhisper in his home
MIDDLE: (internal dilemma, surprise)he declines to be part of the pixie alliance
ENDING: (character changes radically)his wife, Poppycloud, talks him into joining the alliance and he and Bladesong vanish through a portal

SCENE 13: EXT. LONGREN’S FIELD -DAY
Scene Arc: from Nightshade resisting to join to him agreeing to volunteer for the Pixie alliance
Essence: Nightshade is told to volunteer for the Pixie alliance
Conflict: Nightshade is resistant to being a part of the alliance
Subtext: what do I get out of this
Hope/fear: Khyber-Ra gets Nightshade to volunteer/Nightshade turns him down and tells his queen about Khyber-Ra

BEGINNING: (betrayal)Nightshade secretly practicing dark magic in a secluded valley
MIDDLE: (superior position, intrigue)Khyber-Ra appears to him and wants him to volunteer to be a part of the alliance
ENDING: (character changes radically, major twist)he refuses, until Khyber-Ra puts his wife in a suspension spell, then he agrees to join the alliance to get him the numinous amulet

SCENE 14: INT. QUEEN SUNSHOWER’S CHAMBERS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Queen Sunshower not knowing who to choose to Nightshade volunteering
Essence: Nightshade volunteers for the Pixie alliance
Conflict: should Queen Sunshower allow Nightshade to join the Pixie alliance
Subtext: I am being forced to do this
Hope/fear: Queen Sunshower does not let Nightshade join the Pixie alliance/Nightshade will be a part of the Pixie alliance

BEGINNING: (external dilemma)Sunshower’s dilemma of who to pick to be a part of the alliance
MIDDLE: (surprise, superior position)she chooses a pixie, but Nightshade comes to her and volunteers
ENDING: (external dilemma, uncomfortable moment)the chosen pixie begs her to use Nightshade and they step into the field of light

SCENE 15: EXT. HALF-HALLOWS NOOK -DAY
Scene Arc: from assembling the alliance to sending them into the realm through a portal to the first fragment
Essence: getting the Pixie alliance through to the first fragment
Conflict: Emberleaf must go, but she is defenseless against what is out in the realm
Subtext: WILLOWBREEZE -I will protect Emberleaf with my life; THORNWHISPER -I do not want to do this; NIGHTSHADE -I want to do Khyber-Ra proud
Hope/fear: the Pixie alliance will protect Emberleaf/Emberleaf will be killed in the realm

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)the queens bring their chosen ones to the secret location perform an ancient ritual to help protect them from the dangers of the realm
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)they conjure up a one-time use rewind spell for Emberleaf and place a locator spell on her
ENDING: (suspense)all the queens join forces and open a portal to the area where a fragment of the numinous amulet is

SCENE 16: EXT. FORBIDDEN FOREST -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra at the edge of the forbidden forest to summoning dark creatures he created to go after the Pixie alliance
Essence: Khyber-Ra getting his dark creatures to go after the pixie alliance
Conflict: will his creatures do as he instructs them to
Subtext: I created you, you should obey me
Hope/fear: the dark creatures go after Khyber-Ra/the dark creatures will go after the Pixie alliance

BEGINNING: (intrigue)Khyber-Ra watches the pixie alliance approach the numinous amulet fragment
MIDDLE: (surprise, uncertainty)Khyber-Ra summons the dark creatures he created and they turn on him
ENDING: (suspense)Khyber-Ra steps through the portal with the dark creatures

SCENE 17: EXT. DESERT PLAINS -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf getting a numinous amulet fragment to her getting captured by the dark creatures
Essence: Emberleaf gets a numinous amulet fragment and gains a bit of her magic back
Conflict: can the pixie alliance battle the dark creatures and save Emberleaf
Subtext: I cannot do this on my own
Hope/fear: that Emberleaf will not get captured/the dark creatures will abduct Emberleaf

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)the pixie alliance finds the numinous amulet
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)she takes it and a bit of her magic returns, getting a bit of colors back and her wings begin to unfurl
ENDING: (surprise, cliffhanger)Khyber-Ra appears and has the dark creatures capture her

SCENE 18: EXT. FORBIDDEN FOREST -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra getting Emberleaf to him losing the numinous amulet fragment
Essence: Khyber-Ra cannot touch the numinous amulet fragments due to his dark magic
Conflict: Khyber-Ra cannot take the numinous amulet fragment from Emberleaf
Subtext: now I’ve got the first fragment
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can keep the numinous amulet fragment/Khyber-Ra will take it from her

BEGINNING: (more interesting setting, surprise)Khyber-Ra proudly brings Emberleaf to M’Mranth-Jix
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, misinterpretation)M’Mranth-Jix makes Emberleaf drop the numinous amulet fragment
ENDING: (major twist)Khyber-Ra grabs the numinous amulet fragment and it shooting back to the desert plains

SCENE 19: EXT. HIGHSHIRE MARSH -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra forcing Emberleaf get the numinous amulet fragment to the pixie alliance believing they have defeated Khyber-Ra
Essence: Khyber-Ra takes Emberleaf to retrieve the numinous amulet fragment
Conflict: will Emberleaf get the numinous amulet fragment
Subtext: you will get these for me, than I will take them from you
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will not get the numinous amulet fragment/Khyber-Ra will try

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)Khyber-Ra forces Emberleaf to get the numinous amulet fragment
MIDDLE: (surprise)the pixie alliance finds Khyber-Ra and Emberleaf
ENDING: (mislead/reveal, uncertainty)the pixie alliance fight to protect Emberleaf and Khyber-Ra lets them believe they defeated him

SCENE 20: INT. GEODE CAVE -DAY
Scene Arc: from worrying about the halo-moon cycle to having to prepare to protect from the encroaching darkness
Essence: the Queen’s council must protect their lands from the encroaching darkness
Conflict: will the queens defend their lands before the halo-moon cycle ends
Subtext: we must protect our people and our lands
Hope/fear: the queens can protect their lands/the darkness will take over their lands

BEGINNING: (intrigue)the queens reconvene in the geode cave
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, external dilemma)they consult the mirror water and see two possible endings at the conclusion of the halo-moon cycle
ENDING: (major twist)they adjourn knowing they must defend their lands from the prophecy coming true

SCENE 21: EXT. LIQUID GROUNDS -DAY
Scene Arc: from standing at the edge of the liquid ground to being rescued by Khyber-Ra
Essence: Emberleaf nearly drowns in the liquid ground
Conflict: can Emberleaf over come her fear and cross the liquid ground
Subtext: I don’t think I can do this
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can cross the liquid ground/she will drown

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)Emberleaf and the alliance make it to the liquid grounds
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)she freezes at the edge when the others set out across it
ENDING: (uncertainty, surprise)Khyber-Ra kidnaps Emberleaf’s when she starts sinking in the liquid ground

SCENE 23: EXT. MOUNT DORCHMONT PEAK -DAY
Scene Arc: from reaching the precipice to Emberleaf getting a numinous fragment
Essence: Emberleaf gets a fragment and some of her magic comes back
Conflict: can Emberleaf get the numinous amulet fragment from the floating rocky outcropping
Subtext: I know I can get there
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can get the numinous amulet fragment/she will not be able to make it to the rocky outcropping

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)the alliance finds Emberleaf on the precipice of Mount Dorchmont
MIDDLE: (uncomfortable moment)Emberleaf accepts Thornwhisper’s help and he crafts a magic rope bridge to the floating crag
ENDING: (uncertainty)she gets the numinous amulet fragment

SCENE 24: INT. PASS OF RIDDLMESH -NIGHT
Scene Arc: Emberleaf getting another fragment to Nightshade taking it from her
Essence: Emberleaf gets another numinous amulet fragment and more of her magic back
Conflict: traversing the pass of Riddlmesh and a weakened Emberleaf getting the numinous amulet fragment
Subtext: this is the start of the healing of the numinous amulet
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can endure the force of the winds/Emberleaf will not be able to collect the numinous amulet fragment.

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, external dilemma)the pixie alliance enters the pass of Riddlmesh and battle the cyclone winds
MIDDLE: (surprise)Emberleaf gets the numinous amulet fragment and it fuses with the other fragment
ENDING: (betrayal)Nightshade casts a stasis spell on the alliance and uses Emberleaf’s hand to get the fused numinous amulet fragments into the geode

SCENE 25: EXT. FORBIDDEN FORESTS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Nightshade having the fused numinous amulet fragments to giving them to Khyber-Ra
Essence: Khyber-Ra gets the two fused numinous amulet fragments
Conflict: how can Khyber-Ra safely hold the fused numinous fragments
Subtext: I hopefully will be rewarded
Hope/fear: Khyber-Ra cannot hold the fused numinous amulet fragments/Khyber-Ra can hold the numinous amulet fragments

BEGINNING: (mislead, suspense)a rip in the darkness of the forest, Nightshade appears with the geode
MIDDLE: (surprise, uncomfortable moment)He is captured by dark creatures, one of which he created
ENDING: (reveal, suspense)He gives Khyber-Ra the geode

SCENE 26: EXT. CAVE OF SORROWS -NIGHT
Scene Arc: Nightshade returns and stops Emberleaf from being taken away by a winged creature
Essence: Nightshade rescues Emberleaf from the winged creatures
Conflict: can Nightshade save Emberleaf
Subtext: this will prove my loyalty to the pixie alliance
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will not be taken away/the pixie alliance will not rescue Emberleaf

BEGINNING: (mislead)a winged creature returns Nightshade and he releases the stasis spell
MIDDLE: (misinterpretation, uncertainty)the alliance continues to the cave of sorrows, the winged creature circles overhead
ENDING: (reveal, uncertainty) the creature attacks the alliance. Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper are knocked back, Nightshade rescues Emberleaf, but the winged creature flies off with the fused numinous amulet fragments

SCENE 27: EXT CAVE OF SORROWS -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Willowbreeze being skeptical to Nightshade reasoning his way out of being responsible for the missing fused numinous amulet fragments
Essence: Willowbreeze believes Nightshade stole the fused numinous amulet fragments somehow
Conflict: Willowbreeze’s belief Nightshade stole the fused numinous amulet fragments and his denial of doing that
Subtext: I know you stole them somehow
Hope/fear: Willowbreeze gets Nightshade to confess/Nightshade will reason his way out of being accused

BEGINNING: (character changes radically)Willowbreeze challenges Nightshade, holding him responsible for the attack and the loss of the numinous amulet fragments
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper acknowledge the setting of the halo-moon
ENDING: (misinterpretation)Nightshade reasons with Willowbreeze that he did not set the winged creature upon them

SCENE 28: INT. CAVE OF SORROWS -DAY
Scene Arc: from wearily entering the cave to being entranced by its power over their memories
Essence: the pixie alliance experiences past traumas
Conflict: can they overcome their old wounds
Subtext: I don’t want to relive this
Hope/fear: pixie alliance stays together/the pixie alliance will disband

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)the inscription on the mouth of the cave warns those who enter could relive moments in their past they might not want to unearth
MIDDLE: (suspense, external dilemma)they solve the code and enter the cave of sorrows
ENDING: (suspense, uncertainty)immediately, the pixie alliance is hypnotized and taken under the cave’s spell.

SCECNE 28A: INT. SHRIVVERS NOTCH -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Willowbreeze entering the cave to reliving her wound
Essence: relives her being betrayed by someone she trusted
Conflict: she does not form close relationships with others
Subtext: her willingness to trust anyone deeply again
Hope/fear: she will trust the members of the alliance/she will forever be distant putting the alliance at risk

BEGINNING: (mislead, uncertainty)Willowbreeze is watching herself with another female pixie, fancying a male pixie
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)the other pixie goes over, talks to the male pixie, they look at her and they come back together
ENDING: (betrayal, uncomfortable moment, reveal)the male pixie abases Willowbreeze and he and the other female pixie leave together

SCENE 28B: EXT. MONASTERY MOUNTAIN -DAY
Scene Arc: from Nightshade entering the cave to reliving his wound
Essence: relives falling the sacred monastery opening his land up to a dark creature invasion
Conflict: cannot let dark magic come out when he is angry or nervous
Subtext: knowledge of dark magic will outcast him from his land
Hope/fear: he can use dark magic for the benefit of the alliance/his concealment of dark magic could jeopardize the alliance

BEGINNING: (suspense, uncertainty)Nightshade is in a misty area, the sacred monastery looms high above
MIDDLE: (suspense, external dilemma)he is practicing dark magic spells when one gets away and topples the monastery
ENDING: his magic is stripped for a period of one quarter of the halo-moon cycle

SCENE 28C: INT. COOPER’S RAVINE -DAY
Scene Arc: from Thornwhisper entering the cave to reliving his wound
Essence: insecure about his proficiency with magic
Conflict: does not believe he can live up to the expectations of his ancestors
Subtext: he will never be good enough and be a disgrace to his family
Hope/fear: he will see his proficiency with wielding magic/his self-doubt could put the quest at risk of failure

BEGINNING: (mislead, suspense, uncertainty)Thornwhisper edges around Cooper’s Ravine, snaps a defensive spell against his opponent. Sends off a spell that is easily defended against
MIDDLE: (suspense)the two are spell sparring, Thornwhisper starts hearing voices of his ancestors
ENDING: (uncomfortable moment, suspense)He sends a spell against a mirror image of his opponent, and is tagged with a freeze spell, loses the match and watches his family walk away in disgrace

SCENE 29: EXT. GOLDEN FALLS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf innocently playing to creating a dark magic creature
Essence: Emberleaf uses dark magic to her mother’s disgust
Conflict: will Emberleaf get in trouble for using dark magic
Subtext: what did I do wrong
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will learn not to use dark magic/Emberleaf will get severely punished for using dark magic

BEGINNING: (mislead, internal dilemma)Emberleaf crossed legged on a crag by the falls. She is playing with the sealife,
MIDDLE: (character changes rapidly, revealshe creates a twisted creature that preys on the sea creatures
ENDING: (uncomfortable moment, character changes rapidly)Emberleaf’s mother zaps a spell at the twisted creature and it vanishes

SCENE 30: EXT. VAST REALM -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from light to darkness approaching the lands as the halo-moon cycle closes in on the horizon
Essence: darkness is approaching the lands
Conflict: will the numinous amulet be restored before the darkness reaches the lands
Subtext:
Hope/fear: the numinous amulet will be restored in time to stop the darkness advancing/the darkness will take over the lands

BEGINNING: (suspense, mystery)the edge of light, a darkness rolls forward
MIDDLE: (intrigue, mystery)claws and hands and arms and feet pop in and out of the advancing dark shadow
ENDING: (suspense, mystery)a burrowing animal sticks its head up and the animal is pulled into the encroaching darkness

SCENE 31: EXT. GRANKOR FOREST -NIGHT
Scene Arc: Emberleaf entering the forest to her being attacked by the creature she created as a child
Essence: Emberleaf enters Grankor forest
Conflict: will Emberleaf make it out of the forest alive
Subtext: why am I entering the forest
Hope/fear: Emberleaf is safe in Grankor forest/Nightshade it up to something sinister

BEGINNING: (mystery)the alliance are confused, disoriented as to how they arrive at the forest
MIDDLE: (intrigue, mystery)Emberleaf enters the forest, the forest shift and the alliance follows
ENDING: (suspense)Emberleaf meets up with creature she created and is pulled under the water

SCENE 34: EXT. GRANKOR FOREST -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf fights against the creature to her being saved after collecting another numinous amulet fragment
Essence: Emberleaf collects another numinous amulet fragment
Conflict: can Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper save Emberleaf
Subtext: we have to save Embeleaf
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can be saved/Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper will not be able to save Emberleaf

BEGINNING: (suspense, misinterpretation)Emberleaf putting up a weak struggle against the creature
MIDDLE: (major twist, misinterpretation)the creature pulls her to the bottom of the basin where she gets a numinous amulet fragment and fuses the fragments together
ENDING: (suspense)Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper save her from the creature

SCENE 35: EXT. GRANKOR FOREST -NIGHT
Scene Arc: Nightshade taking the numinous to Emberleaf banishing Nightshade from the alliance
Essence: Nightshade is caught stealing the numinous amulet fragment
Conflict: will Willowbreeze catches Nightshade stealing the numinous amulet fragment
Subtext: exhibits more courage in her decisions
Hope/fear: Nightshade is caught/Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper will be beaten by Nightshade

BEGINNING: (intrigue, betrayal)as the halo-moon edges closer to the horizon, Nightshade takes the fused numinous amulet fragments from Emberleaf
MIDDLE: (suspense, uncertainty)Willowbreeze catches Nightshade, and she and Thornwhisper capture him
ENDING: (uncertainty)Thornwhisper opens a portal and Emberleaf banishes Nightshade from the alliance

SCENE 37: EXT. FIELD OF STONES -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra pulls Emberleaf into the field of stones to her being rescued by a whispering phantom
Essence: Emberleaf is rescued from Khyber-Ra, holding onto the numinous amulet fragments
Conflict: Khyber-Ra versus the whispering phantom over Emberleaf
Subtext: realizes she is helpless against stopping this prophecy from being fulfilled alone
Hope/fear: Emberleaf is strong enough to resist Khyber-Ra/Khyber-Ra will force Emberleaf to give him the fused numinous amulet fragments

BEGINNING: (suspense, uncertainty)Khyber-Ra pulls Emberleaf through a portal to the field of stones
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)Emberleaf is collects the next numinous amulet fragment, fuses it with the others
ENDING: (surprise, uncertainty)Emberleaf is rescued by a whispering phantom before surrendering the fused fragments to Khyber-Ra

SCENE 40: EXT. WHISPERING PHANTOM’S LAIR -DAY
Scene Arc: from learning the whispering phantom is her mother, Gossimerwind, to her finding out she has dark magic in her
Essence: Emberleaf finds out she has some of her father’s dark magic in her and Gossimerwind is her mother
Conflict: will Emberleaf embrace her connection to the dark magic
Subtext: I cannot believe you did not tell me about my father
Hope/fear: Emberleaf turns away from the dark magic/Emberleaf will embrace the dark magic

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)Emberleaf is in the whispering phantom’s lair
MIDDLE: (surprise, character changes radically)the whispering phantom morphs into a female pixie, who is Emberleaf’s mother
ENDING: (character changes radically, surprise)Emberleaf discovers she has dark magic in her, which complicates her getting her queendom back

SCENE 43: EXT. LIQUID GROUNDS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Gossimerwind escorting Emberleaf to the liquid grounds to Khyber-Ra defeating her mother, sending her back to her lair
Essence: Emberleaf’s mother tries and fails to protect Emberleaf
Conflict: Emberleaf’s mother battles Khyber-Ra over Emberleaf
Subtext: Emberleaf’s love for her daughter
Hope/fear: Emberleaf’s mother can defeat Khyber-Ra/Khyber-Ra will kill Emberleaf’s mother

BEGINNING: (surprise, character changes radically)Gossimerwind brings Emberleaf to the liquid grounds, shows her how to cross it
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)Khyber-Ra shows up and battles Gossimerwind, Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper arrive and all three battle Khyber-Ra
ENDING: (uncertainty, major hook)they are defeated and Khyber-Ra captures Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper, Gossimerwind flies away

SCENE 44: EXT. FOUR LANDS -DAY
Scene Arc: from light to darkness
Essence: the darkness approaches
Conflict: can the darkness be stopped
Subtext: we will take you over
Hope/fear: the darkness can be stopped/the lands will be taken over

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)as the halo-moon continues to set
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)the light on the lands continues to wane
ENDING: (uncertainty, intrigue)darkness encroaches ever closer

SCENE 45: EXT. LIQUID GROUND -DAY
Scene Arc: from keeping the fused numinous amulet fragment to trading it for Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper
Essence: gets closer to fulfilling the prophecy
Conflict: to keep or to trade the fused numinous amulet
Subtext: Emberleaf becomes more empathetic
Hope/fear: Emberleaf trades the fused numinous amulet/Khyber-Ra will kill Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper

BEGINNING: (suspense, uncertainty)Emberleaf crosses back over the liquid grounds at Willowbreeze’s insistence
MIDDLE: (external dilemma, uncertainty)Khyber-Ra is waiting for her with a crystalized Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper and will not let them go unless she gives him the numinous amulet
ENDING: (surprise, character changes radically, major twist)Emberleaf puts the numinous amulet fragments in the geode and he does not thaw Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper

SCENE 48: EXT. LIQUID GROUND -DAY
Scene Arc: from the queen’s council trying for the near complete numinous amulet to them being crystalized by Khyber-Ra
Essence: the queen’s council fails to get the near complete numinous amulet
Conflict: queen’s council versus Khyber-Ra
Subtext: we must, without fail get the amulet
Hope/fear: the queen’s council can get the near complete numinous amulet/Khyber-Ra will defeat the queen’s council

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)the Queen’s council shows up to stop Emberleaf from giving the fused fragments to Khyber-Ra
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)they fight Khyber-Ra for the near complete numinous amulet
ENDING: (major hook, suspense, uncomfortable momentS)Khyber-Ra crystalizes the queens council, Emberleaf give him the numinous amulet fragments

SCENE 49: EXT. LIQUID GROUND -CONTINUOUS
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf using the reverse spell to Nightshade protecting Emberleaf, taking her away from the liquid ground
Essence: Emberleaf is prevented from giving Khyber-Ra the numinous amulet
Conflict: Khyber-Ra wants, but cannot get the fused amulet fragments
Subtext: Emberleaf becomes even more empathetic
Hope/fear: Emberleaf uses the reverse spell on them/Emberleaf will use it on Khyber-Ra

BEGINNING: (surprise, superior position)Emberleaf uses the reverse spell, resetting the time back to before Khyber-Ra crystalizes Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)the queens council arrive, they and Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper battle Khyber-Ra, Nightshade joins him
ENDING: (misinterpretation, suspense, character changes radically)Nightshade turns and casts a protection spell on Emberleaf, takes her away

SCENE 51: EXT. BRACHNON PEAK -DAY
Scene Arc: from Nightshade getting the numinous amulet fragments to everyone appearing on the peak
Essence: queen’s council fails to get the fused numinous amulet pieces from Khyber-Ra
Conflict: can the queen’s council get the fused numinous amulet from Khyber-Ra
Subtext: we must save our lands ladies
Hope/fear: the queen’s council can get the fused fragment/Khyber-Ra will get all the numinous amulet fragments

BEGINNING: Nightshade and Emberleaf appear on the peak
MIDDLE: Emberleaf cannot resist Nightshade getting the numinous amulet fragments from her
ENDING: everyone is deposited on the peak, Khyber-Ra separates Emberleaf from the rest

SCENE 52: EXT. BRACHNON PEAK -CONTINUOUS
Scene Arc: from the queens council and Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper getting Emberleaf from Nightshade to him getting the fragments from Khyber-Ra, completing the numinous amulet
Essence: Nightshade completes the numinous amulet
Conflict: can Nightshade get Emberleaf to drop the last fragment into the geode
Subtext: wrapping up the prophecy, hoping it is the right thing to do
Hope/fear: Nightshade does not get the geode from Khyber-Ra/Khyber-Ra does not get the last numinous amulet fragment from Nightshade

BEGINNING: (suspense, character changes radically, misinterpretation)the queen’s council and the alliance battle Khyber-Ra, get Emberleaf from him but not before she gives him the fragments of the numinous amulet
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)Nightshade and Khyber-Ra battle for the amulet pieces
ENDING: (suspense, major twist)Nightshade gets the numinous amulet fragments from Khyber-Ra combines the geodes and the numinous amulet is now complete

SCENE 53 & 54: EXT. BRACHNON PEAK -CONTINUOUS
Scene Arc: from Nightshade having the numinous amulet to the queens council getting it from Khyber-Ra
Essence: Khyber-Ra breaks the protection spell and gets the geode and numinous amulet
Conflict: can Nightshade keep the protection spell intact
Subtext: Persistence pays off
Hope/fear: the queens council can get the numinous amulet/Khyber-Ra will break the protection spell

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense,)Khyber-Ra and the queens council battle Nightshade, he intensifies the protection spell but the queens council nullifies it
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)Khyber-Ra lassoes the geode and pulls it to him
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense)Khyber-Ra loses the numinous amulet to the queens council, who puts it under their protection

SCENE 56: EXT. BRACHNON PEAK -CONTINUOUS
Scene Arc: from the queens council protecting the numinous amulet to M’Mranth-Jix controlling Emberleaf to get him the numinous amulet
Essence: a weak Emberleaf is controlled by M’Mranth-Jix to get him numinous amulet
Conflict: Emberleaf cannot resist M’Mranth-Jix’s control
Subtext: if I do this the prophecy will come true
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can reach the numinous amulet/M’Mranth-Jix will get the numinous amulet

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)the queens council opens a portal to get the numinous amulet back to Eveandor, Lightthistle comes through
MIDDLE: (mislead, suspense)Thornwhisper casts a mobilization spell, Emberleaf takes the numinous amulet
ENDING: (character changes radically, suspense, uncertainty)M’Mranth-Jix comes up out of the abyss puts a influence bubble around Emberleaf and brings him the numinous amulet

SCENE 60: EXT. EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: from the Eveandorians holding off the dark creatures to them losing ground
Essence: the Eveandorians cannot hold back the marauding dark creatures
Conflict: Eveandorians versus the dark creatures
Subtext: we cannot let Eveandor fall
Hope/fear: Eveandorians can repel the dark creatures/the dark creatures will overtake the Eveandorians

BEGINNING: (suspense, uncertainty)the darkness reaches Eveandor
MIDDLE: (suspense, uncertainty)the Eveandorians ready themselves to battle the dark creatures
ENDING: (suspense, uncertainty)the dark creatures invade Eveandor, forcing them back into their land

SCENE 62: EXT. BRACHNON PEAK -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf handing M’Mranth-Jix the numinous amulet to it falling into the abyss
Essence: Thornwhisper prevents M’Mranth-Jix from touching the numinous amulet
Conflict: can Willowbreeze, Thornwhisper. Lightthistle along with the queens council and Khyber-Ra get the numinous amulet from M’Mranth-Jix
Subtext: believing in yourself
Hope/fear: can they stop Emberleaf from giving M’Mranth-Jix the numinous amulet/M’Mranth-Jix will get the numinous amulet

BEGINNING: (suspense, uncertainty)Emberleaf losing the fight to resist M’Mranth-Jix’s control over her, the queens council and Lightthistle doing their best to prevent M’Mranth-Jix from getting the numinous amulet
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, uncomfortable moment)Emberleaf handing the numinous amulet to M’Mranth-Jix, Willowbreeze and Thornwhisper and Nightshade join the queens council
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense, cliffhanger)Willowbreeze, Thornwhisper. Lightthistle, Khyber-Ra and the queens council all want to get the numinous amulet and it falls over the edge of the peak, into the mists

SCENE 65: EXT. ABYSS -DAY
Scene Arc: from all of them fighting for the numinous amulet to them realizing it is nowhere to be seen
Essence: M’Mranth-Jix is beating back the group
Conflict: the group persevering against M’Mranth-Jix
Subtext: the one is more powerful than the many
Hope/fear: the group can overpower M’Mranth-Jix/M’Mrant-Jix will beat the group

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)M’Mranth-Jix is easily defending himself against the group
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)the group starts to push back against M’Mranth-Jix
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense)they reach the bottom and the numinous amulet is nowhere to be seen

SCENE 66: EXT. EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: Eveandorians losing more ground to the advancing dark creatures
Essence: Eveandor is about to fall into the control of the dark creatures
Conflict: Eveandorians versus the dark creatures
Subtext: we are not going to win
Hope/fear: Eveandorians can rally and defeat the dark creatures/Eveandor will fall to the dark creatures

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)Eveandor is being ravaged by the dark creatures
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)Eveandor’s forces retreat into the inner stronghold
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense)the dark creatures advance on the inner stronghold

SCENE 67: BRACHNON PEAK -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf dying to her falling over the edge of the peak
Essence: Emberleaf was the prophecy all along
Conflict: can a dying Emberleaf get the numinous amulet
Subtext: determination to save Eveandor
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can get the numinous amulet before she fully crystalizes/M’Mranth-Jix will arise from the abyss and take the numinous amulet

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)Emberleaf is almost fully crystalized when Gossimerwind appears to her as the halo-moon cycle ends
MIDDLE: (suspense, character changes radically)she inches closer to the edge of the peak, Gossimerwind sacrifices herself to get Emberleaf to the numinous amulet
ENDING: (cliff hanger, uncertainty, suspense)Emberleaf drops over the edge

SCENE 68: EXT. EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: Eveandorians losing more ground to the advancing dark creatures
Essence: Eveandor is about to fall into the control of the dark creatures
Conflict: Eveandorians versus the dark creatures
Subtext: we are not going to win
Hope/fear: Eveandorians can rally and defeat the dark creatures/Eveandor will fall to the dark creatures

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)the inner stronghold falls
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)Eveandor’s forces are being defeated
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense)queen Emberleaf’s castle is taken over

SCENE 69: EXT. ABYSS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf getting the numinous amulet to the group defeating M’Mranth-jix
Essence: Emberleaf, the alliance and Khyber-Ra defeat M’Mranth-Jix
Conflict: everybody versus M’Mranth-Jix
Subtext: we will defeat him
Hope/fear: they all will defeat M’Mranth-Jix/M’Mranth-Jix is too strong to be defeated

BEGINNING: Emberleaf lands on a rocky outcropping, onto the numinous amulet
MIDDLE: the group flash up out of the mists, Emberleaf is not healing
ENDING: Thornwhisper casts a spell on M’Mranth-Jix, Emberleaf gives him the numinous amulet

SCENE 69A: EXT. EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: the Eveandorians start to push back against the dark creatures
Essence: the Eveandorians start to win back their land
Conflict: dark creatures versus Eveandorians
Subtext: light will overpower the darkness
Hope/fear: Eveandorians can defeat the dark creatures/the dark creatures will rise back up against the Eveandorians

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, suspense)the dark creatures are on the brink of taking over Eveandor
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)WHAT HAPPENS HERE TO GIVE the Eveandor forces hope of defeating the dark creatures
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense)the Eveandor forces mount a resurgence against the dark creatures

SCENE 70: EXT. BASE OF BRACHNON PEAK -DAY
Scene Arc: from M’Mranth-Jix has the amulet to the group being saved by Khyber-Ra
Essence: Emberleaf loses the numinous amulet to Khyber-Ra
Conflict: can Emberleaf keep Khyber-Ra from getting the numinous amulet
Subtext: I must save Eveandor
Hope/fear: Emberleaf can keep the numinous amulet/Khyber-Ra will get the numinous amulet

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)M’Mranth-Jix holds the numinous amulet high
MIDDLE: (uncertainty, suspense)he opens a portal to the shadowlands, tosses the group toward the portal
ENDING: (character changes radically, surprise)Khyber-Ra wields dark magic and puts a forcefield in front of the portal, the group cascade into it

SCENE 71: EXT. EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: from Eveandorians pushing back to the dark creatures advancing on them again
Essence: Eveandor is about to fall
Conflict: Eveandorians versus the dark creatures
Subtext: we cannot hold them off much longer
Hope/fear: Eveandorians can emerge victorious/dark creatures will overrun Eveandor

BEGINNING: (suspense, uncertainty)Eveandor’s forces are weakened
MIDDLE: (suspense, uncertainty)the dark creatures push back against Eveandor’s forces
ENDING: (suspense, uncertainty)Eveandor’s castle falls to the dark creatures

SCENE 72: EXT. BASE OF BRACHNON PEAK -DAY
Scene Arc: from M’Mranth-Jix beating down Khyber-Ra to Lightthistle sacrificing herself to get Emberleaf the numinous amulet
Essence: Lightthistle sacrifices herself to get the numinous amulet to Emberleaf
Conflict: can Lightthistle get the numinous amulet away from Khyber-Ra
Subtext: I’ll give my life to save Eveandor
Hope/fear: Lightthistle gets the numinous amulet from Khyber-Ra/Lightthistle will sacrifice herself to get the numinous amulet to Emberleaf

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)Khyber-Ra is beaten down by M’Mranth-Jix
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)M’Mranth-Jix opens another portal tosses Khyber-Ra toward it
ENDING: (character changes radically)Lightthistle sacrifices herself to save Khyber-Ra and gets the numinous amulet to Emberleaf

SCENE 73: EXT. BASE OF BRACHNON PEAK -CONTINUOUS
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf dying to being reborn
Essence: Emberleaf reanimates stronger than she was and neutralizes Khyber-Ra’s magic
Conflict: Khyber-Ra doesn’t give up trying to get the numinous amulet from Emberleaf
Subtext: even without my magic, I will defeat you
Hope/fear: Emberleaf leaves Khyber-Ra magicless/Khyber-Ra will beat Emberleaf even in a physical fight

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)Emberleaf protects the numinous amulet from M’Mranth-Jix’s attempts to get it back
MIDDLE: (suspense, uncertainty, mislead)a field of rocks liquify and smothers Emberleaf
ENDING: (reveal, suspense)Emberleaf emerges reborn and stronger than she was before

SCENE 74: EXT. EVEANDOR -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf imprisoning M’Mranth-Jix to Eveandorians defeating the dark creatures
Essence: the dark creatures retreat from Eveandor, back to the forbidden forests
Conflict: Eveandorians are triumphant against the dark creatures
Subtext: we have taken back our land
Hope/fear: Eveandor will not fall to the dark creatures/the dark creatures will resurge and conquer Eveandor

BEGINNING: (character changes radically)Emberleaf casts M’Mranth-Jix back to his prison
MIDDLE: (uncertainty)Khyber-Ra leads the dark creatures against the Eveandorians
ENDING: (uncertainty, suspense)the group and the Eveandorians push back against the dark creatures, and are victorious

SCENE 75: EXT. EVEANDOR CIRCLE OF JUSTICE -DAY
Scene Arc: from Khyber-Ra banished once again from Eveandor to Emberleaf in flux as to her place knowing she has dark magic inside her
Essence: Emberleaf is a more confident queen
Conflict: Emberleaf’s determination to banish Khyber-Ra without hesitation
Subtext: you will not bother anyone again
Hope/fear: Emberleaf wields swift and harsh justice on Khyber-Ra/Emberleaf will be hesitant about punishment on Khyber-Ra

BEGINNING: (uncertainty, superior position) the queens council banish Khyber-Ra to the cloaked realm
MIDDLE: (cliffhanger0Nightshade is banished from [his land]
ENDING: (uncertainty)Emberleaf’s fate is in the hands of the queens council, because she knows dark magic

SCENE 76: INT. GEODE CAVE -NIGHT
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf’s fate in the hands of the queen’s council to remaining queen, but without her magical powers
Essence: Emberleaf accepts her fate of being removed from the queen’s council
Conflict: Emberleaf should not be allowed to remain queen, but due to extenuating circumstances, the queen’s council shows leniency
Subtext: you saved Eveandor, but dark magic flows through you
Hope/fear: Emberleaf will remain queen of Eveandor/the queen’s council will banish her from Eveandor

BEGINNING: (betrayal, suspense, major twist)the queens council meet, consult the mirror water about Emberleaf’s fate
MIDDLE: (external dilemma, suspense, uncertainty)Emberleaf is presented with the options of remaining the queen of Eveandor, but without her magic abilities, or keeping her magical powers but being removed as queen of Eveandor.
ENDING: (character changes radically, surprise, major twist)Emberleaf decides to remain queen of Eveandor, and is removed of all her magical powers

SCENE 77: EXT. HOVENMIRE -DAY
Scene Arc: from Thornwhisper being contrite to accepting he is a hero
Essence: Thornwhisper accepts being hailed as a hero
Conflict: will Thornwhisper change now
Subtext: I deserve this
Hope/fear: Thornwhisper is hailed a hero/Thornwhisper will not want to be revered

BEGINNING: (uncertainty)Thornwhisper come home to his family
MIDDLE: (misinterpretation, mislead)Thornwhisper’s ancestors acknowledge his magical prowess
ENDING: (reveal, character changes radically)Hovenmire gives Thornwhisper a celebration and his brothers recognize mastery of magic

SCENE 78: INT. EMBERLEAF’S CHAMBERS -DAY
Scene Arc: from Emberleaf a once hesitant queen to being more determined and confident in her decisions
Essence: Emberleaf adds Willowbreeze as her new advisor and shows leniency on Nightshade as her new magic trainer
Conflict: is Emberleaf making wise decisions or is she acting on new empathetic emotions
Subtext: Eveandor’s rebirth will be great
Hope/fear: Emberleaf shows her new found empathy and confidence/Emberleaf will have not changed her ways

BEGINNING: (character changes radically) Eveandor has a fete for Emberleaf
MIDDLE: (surprise, major twist)Emberleaf appoints Willowbreeze as her new advisor, and Willowbreeze’s queen allowing to leave her land to be with Emberleaf
ENDING: (major twist)Emberleaf welcomes Nightshade to live in Eveandor and appoints him as her new magic trainer

• This reply was modified 10 months, 1 week ago by  Jan Westbrook.
• This reply was modified 10 months, 1 week ago by  Jan Westbrook.

[Diane Denham]

Bonnie's Fascinating Scenes:
ALIENS ON A PLANE
Scene 1

ACT 1:
OPENING
EXT. SPECIAL OPS UNIT – FUTURE EARTH – DAY
Scene Description: Xiola and Xe are attacked while on a special mission, Xe disappears, and Xiola is rescued.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Xiola and Xe defending themselves against an attack.
• Middle: (Misinterpretation) Xiola believes Xe is genuinely struggling and tries to protect her, unaware that Xe set this up.
• Ending: (Major Twist) Xe disappears and Xiola escapes, thinking Xe is dead.
INT. DISTANT PLANET – DAY
Scene Description: On a distant planet, three rival ET travel agents prepare their respective ET tourists for multidimensional vacations.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Excitement for the launch as the agents prepare their tourists.
• Middle: (Superior Position) Zartuuf secretly tampers with the others’ devices, increasing tension.
• Ending: (Suspense) We fear things will go wrong due to Zartuuf’s sabotage.

INCITING INCIDENT
EXT. SPECIAL OPS UNIT – DAY
Scene Description: Special agent Xiola prepares for a secret mission.
• Beginning: (Uncertainty) Xiola feels anxious about the mission.
• Middle: (Suspense) Team members’ tense behavior increases Xiola’s anxiety.
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Xiola bravely and confidently accepts the call despite her fears.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE COCKPIT/CABIN – PRESENT DAY EARTH
Scene Description: Captain in a good mood, flies through clear skies until turbulence hits out of nowhere.
• Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Relaxed Captain flying the plane through blue skies.
• Middle: (Uncertainty) Sudden turbulence shakes the plane, causing chaos.
• Ending: (Suspense) The Captain stabilizes the plane, but the cause of the turbulence remains unknown.
TURNING POINT
EXT/INT. ET CONFED – DAY
Scene Description: Zhetak shows his “good side” while Xe is in disguise.
• Beginning: (Superior Position) Disguised Xe and “good side” Zhetak in a friendly chat.
• Middle: (Betrayal) Zhetak’s true reptilian face is revealed when he enters a secret room.
• Ending: (Mystery) The reveal of Zhetak’s true form hints at his nefarious plans.

ACT 2:
NEW PLAN
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – PRESENT DAY EARTH
Scene Description: The plane experiences sudden unexplained turbulence.
• Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Everyone engaged in different, fairly peaceful activities.
• Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) Sudden jolts and shaking cause chaos and confusion among passengers.
• Ending: (Suspense) The plane stabilizes, but passengers and crew are left on edge.
EXT. QUARKY’S HOME PLANET – DAY
Scene Description: Quarky advises their people, one after the other, to the point of exhaustion, when the Elders suggest a break.
• Beginning: (Uncomfortable Moment) Quarky overwhelmed from spiritual counseling for their people.
• Middle: (Intrigue) Elders suggest a vacation, hinting at something more (perhaps a plan to replace them?).
• Ending: (Relief) Quarky feels relieved and excited about taking a break, although haunted by a lingering suspicion.

PLAN IN ACTION
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola lands on the plane and has awkward meetings with Quarky and Zartuuf.
• Beginning: (Surprise) Xiola lands on the plane.
• Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Awkward comical meetings with Quarky and Zartuuf.
• Ending: (Intrigue) Xiola and Quarky unaware they are siblings, adding layers to their interactions.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola discovers a number of portals on the plane and tries to keep cool in front of passengers while fumbling desperately to close them.
• Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Xiola discovers dangerous portals.
• Middle: (Suspense) Xiola tries desperately to blend in while handling the anomalies.
• Ending: (Surprise) She successfully closes the portals, but the threat remains.
EXT. ET CONFED – NIGHT
Scene Description: Shortly after Zhetak launches his attack, his system goes haywire, and portals begin appearing in his room.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Zhetak’s device goes haywire.
• Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Zhetak panics as portals appear in his surroundings. Xe fears her efforts won’t last.
• Ending: (Mystery) Xe secretly uses her future tech to counteract his attack, hinting at her hidden role.

MIDPOINT TURNING POINT
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola discovers a beautiful, mesmerizing portal and falls prey to its hypnotic power.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Xiola gazes into the open portal.
• Middle: (Suspense) She falls under its spell, struggling with emotions and memories.
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) She escapes its magnetic, mesmerizing power, revealing her emotional wound.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola, mesmerized, locked into the mesmerizing energy of the portal, is saved by Quarky.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Xiola in danger of being swallowed by the portal.
• Middle: (Reveal) Quarky secretly closes the portal combining their hidden powers with Xiola’s.
• Ending: (Hope) Xiola is saved, hinting at Quarky’s true abilities and their sibling connection to Xiola.

ACT 3:
RETHINK EVERYTHING
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN – NIGHT
Scene Description: Zartuuf’s manipulative actions start to create tension and distrust among the agents and tourists.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) The group is relatively cooperative.
• Middle: (Betrayal) Xiola overhears Zartuuf’s suspicious conversation with Zhetak and confronts him.
• Ending: (Mystery) Seeds of distrust are planted, especially towards Zartuuf.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – GALLEY/CABIN – DAY
Scene Description: Quarky begins to bond with Xiola as they team up to fix odd meals and zero gravity occurrences.
• Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Xiola and Quarky, cautious allies, meet in the galley.
• Middle: (Uncertainty) They handle anomalies of meals and zero gravity on the plane that requires teamwork.
• Ending: (Hope) They develop a sense of camaraderie and trust as they join forces to fix weirdness.
NEW PLAN
INT. ET CONFED – DAY
Scene Description: Zhetak calls Bazz, his brother and rogue agent in Special Ops Unit, leaves angry threatening message that their efforts are being neutralized by Xiola.
Beginning: (Mystery) Zhetak calls someone. (We don’t know that this is his brother, Bazz).
Middle: (Intrigue) Zhetak leaves angry threatening message that Xiola is neutralizing their attacks.
End: (Superior Position) Zhetak goes to his secret room to calm himself beside his ET pets.
TURNING POINT: HUGE FAILURE / MAJOR SHIFT
INT. SPECIAL OPS UNIT – DAY
Scene description: Bazz, who is part of a rogue faction of Xiola’s Special Ops organization, calls Zhetak, reluctant to continue attacks since he is under close surveillance by his commanding officers. Zhetak pressures and threatens brother, Bazz to double-down attacks on the plane. Bazz reluctantly agrees, feeling he is already under suspicion.
Beginning: (Mystery) Bazz, who is in a rogue faction of Xiola’s Special Ops organization, calls his brother, Zhetak.
Middle: (Fear) Bazz refuses to double-down attacks, feeling he is already under suspicion.
End: (Conspiracy) Zhetak pressures and threatens him. Bazz reluctantly agrees.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CARGO HOLD – DAY
Scene Description: Zartuuf’s fear and insecurity surface during a crisis, revealing his vulnerability.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Zartuuf is confident and composed.
• Middle: (Reveal) Zartuuf’s vulnerability is exposed during turbulence and gravity anomaly. Calls father for help.
• Ending: (Mystery) Humms to himself to change his frequency, using his hidden musical talent complicates his relationship with Xiola.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola uses future tech to disguise herself and investigate.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Xiola is uncertain and cautious.
• Middle: (Intrigue) Xiola struggles with her Flight Attendent disguise and interactions with passengers.
• Ending: (Reveal) Xiola gains new information and respect from Zartuuf.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – LAVATORY – DAY
Scene Description: Quarky decides to reveal their powers to openly assist Xiola and Zartuuf.
• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Quarky is hesitant and hiding their true abilities.
• Middle: (Surprise) Quarky confidently uses their shamanic powers to save a passenger.
• Ending: (Hope) Quarky gains trust and respect, highlighting their growth.

ACT 4:
CLIMAX/ULTIMATE EXPRESSION OF THE CONFLICT
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – GALLEY – NIGHT
Scene Description: On a secret call with his father, Zartuuf contemplates betraying Xiola to stay in Zhetak’s favor but ultimately decides to support her.
• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Zartuuf is torn between loyalty to Zhetak and feelings for Xiola.
• Middle: (Suspense) Zhetak orders Zartuuf to sabotage Xiola’s efforts.
• Ending: (Hope) Zartuuf secretly decides to aid Xiola, betraying Zhetak.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – GALLEY – NIGHT
Scene Description: Quarky discovers a hidden device that is causing one of the anomalies.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Quarky stumbles upon the hidden device.
• Middle: (Uncertainty) They are unsure how to deactivate it without causing more harm.
• Ending: (Hope) Quarky finds a way to temporarily stabilize the device, buying them more time.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – PASSENGER SEAT – DAY
Scene Description: Quarky faces the moral dilemma of using their abilities openly versus maintaining their cover and confessing to Zartuuf about hiding Gizdink. Zartuuf develops a conscience without Gizdink.
• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Quarky is conflicted about using their powers and hiding Gizdink.
• Middle: (Reveal) Quarky decides to embrace their true self and confess.
• Ending: (Hope) Zartuuf develops a conscience, influenced by Quarky’s honesty.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CARGO HOLD – NIGHT
Scene Description: As Zartuuf enters, Xiola receives a clue about her mother’s disappearance.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Xiola is in the dark about her mother’s fate.
• Middle: (Intrigue) Zartuuf enters as Xiola receives a critical clue, struggles with its emotional impact and her attraction to Zartuuf.
• Ending: (Hope) Xiola is driven by newfound determination.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN – DAY
Scene Description: In the midst of escalating chaotic events, Xiola, Zartuuf and Quarky plan their next steps.
• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Xiola is conflicted about her priorities.
• Middle: (Intrigue) Quarky suggests a risky but promising plan.
• Ending: (Hope) They resolve to move forward together to stop Zhetak.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN – NIGHT
Scene Description: Zhetak creates a major anomaly on the plane.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Tension rises as the plane experiences minor disturbances.
• Middle: (More Interesting Setting) A major anomaly occurs, throwing everything into chaos.
• Ending: (Mystery) The cause of the anomaly is unclear, increasing tension.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN – DAY
Scene Description: Xiola and Zartuuf work together to stabilize the anomaly, revealing Zartuuf’s skills.
• Beginning: (Uncertainty) Xiola and Zartuuf are hesitant to trust each other.
• Middle: (Reveal) Zartuuf’s skills come into play as they manage the crisis together.
• Ending: (Hope) A newfound trust forms between Xiola and
Zartuuf.

RESOLUTION
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN – DAY
Scene Description: Zhetak’s influence on the plane grows, causing widespread chaos.
• Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) The plane’s environment becomes increasingly unstable.
• Middle: (Suspense) Passengers and crew panic as the anomalies worsen.
• Ending: (Mystery) Xiola, Quarky, and Zartuuf must find a way to counteract Zhetak’s power.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – LAVATORY – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola receives a message from an unknown ally offering crucial information.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Xiola is surprised by the unexpected message.
• Middle: (Reveal) The message contains critical information about Zhetak and Xe.
• Ending: (Hope) Xiola feels closer to uncovering the truth and defeating Zhetak.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – COCKPIT – DAY
Scene Description: Xiola, Zartuuf, and Quarky work together on a plan to defeat Zhetak, letting the Captain in on it.
• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) They struggle to agree on the best course of action, enter the cockpit.
• Middle: (Hope) They finally come up with a united plan and share it with the Captain.
• Ending: (Suspense) They prepare to put their plan into action, knowing the risks involved.
INT. ET CONFED – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola transports the team to the ET Confed, where a final showdown with Zhetak takes place.
• Beginning: (Suspense) Tension builds as they confront Zhetak on his home ground, find his secret room.
• Middle: (Conflict) An intense battle ensues, with everyone fighting for survival, ET pets scatter and join the fun.
• Ending: (Major Twist) Zhetak is defeated, his secret room with stolen technology is destroyed, and Xe’s true allegiance is revealed, adding complexity to the victory.

INT. SPECIAL OPS HQ/PRISON – DAY
Scene Description: Zhetak is sentenced. Xiola, Zartuuf and Quarky escort Zhetak to his cell. Xiola transports the ET travel agents and tourists to their home planet. The thr
Beginning: (Relief) Zhetak is taken into custody.
Middle: He is sentenced and the three escort him to his cell.
End: Xiola transports the ET travel agents and tourists home.
EXT. SPECIAL OPS HQ – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola, Zartuuf and Quarky watch a monitor, showing the plane stabilizes, and the portals beginning to close, restoring order.
• Beginning: (Relief) The plane returns to normalcy.
• Middle: (Hope) Passengers and crew begin to recover from the ordeal.
• Ending: (Intrigue) Xiola, Quarky, and Zartuuf share a moment of reflection, hinting at future adventures.
INT. SPECIAL OPS HQ CAFE’ – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola and Zartuuf have a final conversation, cementing their bond and hinting at future collaboration.
• Beginning: (Relief) The immediate crisis is over, they share a moment of calm, almost kiss, but realize it’s a bad idea when Quarky joins them.
• Middle: (Connection) They discuss their experiences and the growth they’ve undergone.
• Ending: (Hope) Xiola, Zartuuf and Quarky make a pact to stay in touch and support each other in future missions.
INT. SPECIAL OPS HQ, CAFE’ – NIGHT
Scene Description: When Zartuuf leaves the table, Quarky, in a reflective moment, reveals a personal secret to Xiola, deepening their friendship.
• Beginning: (Intrigue) Xiola notices Quarky acting unusually.
• Middle: (Reveal) Quarky shares a deeply personal story, explaining their motives and fears around his Shamanic powers, while casually neutralizing a tiny portal that appears in her coffee cup.
• Ending: (Connection) Xiola reassures Quarky, solidifying their bond.
INT. COMMERCIAL AIRLINE – CABIN/CARGO HOLD – DAY
Scene Description: The Captain reassures the passengers the danger is over. Passengers share their experiences, adding light-hearted moments and closure to their individual stories. Gizdink stows away.
• Beginning: (Relief) As the Captain reassures them, the passengers start to relax and talk among themselves.
• Middle: (Humor) Light-hearted and humorous exchanges occur as passengers recount their extraordinary experience.
• Ending: (Connection) A sense of community forms among the passengers, despite the strange events. Gizdink crawls into the cargo hold, unlocks the animal cages and they party. Quarky stows away with their animal friends.
INT. SPECIAL OPS HQ PRISON – NIGHT
Scene Description: Zhetak, in his last moments, hints at a larger, more dangerous threat looming over the galaxy.
• Beginning: (Tension) Zhetak, injured and weakened, confronts Xiola one last time.
• Middle: (Reveal) He cryptically warns Xiola about a greater danger.
• Ending: (Suspense) Zhetak’s warning leaves Xiola pondering the future, adding a layer of complexity to their victory.
EXT. SPECIAL OPS HQ – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola, Quarky and Zartuuf watch a holographic display of the plane landing safely, and passengers disembarking, grateful for their survival.
• Beginning: (Relief) Xiola, Quarky and Zartuuf watch the plane touch down smoothly.
• Middle: (Closure) Passengers and crew exit the plane, expressing relief and gratitude to pilot and crew.
• Ending: (Hope) Xiola, Quarky, and Zartuuf watch as the last passengers leave, feeling a sense of accomplishment and readiness for whatever comes next.
INT. SPECIAL OPS HQ – FUTURE EARTH – DAY
Scene Description: Xiola floats her new initiatives past Quarky and Zartuuf, plans for two new special units, one will protect inter-dimensional travel throughout the galaxy, and the other needs a mentor to train students in multidimensional Shamanic journeys.
• Beginning: (Connection) Xiola describes her new initiatives to Zartuuf and Quarky, they exchange glances.
• Middle: (Hope) Xiola fears they won’t volunteer to head the programs. Hopes they will. Quarky and Zartuuf pretend to be disinterested.
• Ending: (Optimism) Quarky totally inspired to share their wisdom, accepts. Zartuuf wholeheartedly takes on the task of leading the unit to protect galactic travel.

DENOUEMENT
EXT. SPECIAL OPS HQ – FUTURE EARTH – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola receives a final, cryptic message from her mother, hinting at new adventurous missions.
• Beginning: (Surprise) Xiola’s device pings with a new message.
• Middle: (Intrigue) The message contains vague but intriguing information about future threats and mysteries.
• Ending: (Hope) Xiola looks up at the night sky, determined and ready for what lies ahead.
EXT. CITY STREET – FUTURE EARTH – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola walks through the bustling city, blending in with the crowd, as she prepares for her next mission.
• Beginning: (Reflection) Xiola navigates the busy streets, lost in thought.
• Middle: (Hope) She observes the ordinary lives around her, feeling a renewed sense of purpose.
• Ending: (Determination) Xiola disappears into the crowd, ready to tackle whatever challenges come her way.
EXT. UNKNOWN GALAXY – NIGHT
Scene Description: A distant, menacing figure observes the aftermath of Zhetak’s defeat, hinting at future conflicts.
• Beginning: (Suspense) The figure watches Xiola’s actions from afar.
• Middle: (Mystery) The figure’s intentions and identity remain unknown.
• Ending: (Tension) The figure turns away, planning their next move, setting the stage for future adventures.
INT. SECRET BASE – NIGHT
Scene Description: Xiola reunites with her allies, sharing her experiences and strategizing for future missions.
• Beginning: (Connection) Xiola is greeted warmly by her team.
• Middle: (Hope) They discuss their recent victory and the challenges ahead.
• Ending: (Determination) They begin planning their next steps, united in their mission.
EXT. CITYSCAPE – FUTURE EARTH – NIGHT
Scene Description: A panoramic view of the city at night, symbolizing the vast possibilities and challenges ahead for Xiola and her allies.
• Beginning: (Reflection) The city lights sparkle, representing hope and resilience.
• Middle: (Hope) The view shifts to the night sky, filled with stars and endless possibilities.
• Ending: (Optimism) The camera pans to a single, bright star, symbolizing Xiola’s unwavering spirit and determination.

[jamie handley]

Jamie’s Making Every Scene Fascinating
My scripts get made into powerful movies that impact audiences and view me as a talented, hard working professional.
What I have learned is that even though I only have 22 scenes done to date but I am working on my script and will resubmit when I get it done.

ACT 1 Time Lapse – 1969 – 1980’s
Scene Arc: It begins whit the two sisters becoming adults until they part ways.
Essence: To establish that older sister, Sadie and middle sister Lindsey, had a very close relationship, once upon a time. And shows Sadie’s multiple tragedies that will impact Lindsey’s life.
Conflict: Sadie is on the road of self-destruction and abandons Lindsey. This is where the war begins.
Subtext: Sadie is running away from everyone in her life, drugs and alcohol take over. This is an old wound for Lindsey.
Hope/Fear: We hope something good happens to reunite the sisters and their daughters. And we fear that this could end their relationship and their daughters.

2. INT. COURT HOUSE – DAY
Scene Arc: Lindsey filed for guardianship of her niece, Brooke and it is granted.
Essence: Sadie makes her appearance, but it is too late.
Conflict: Lindsey takes full responsibility while Sadie acts as though she doesn’t care.
Subtext: Sadie’s appearance was just for show.
Hope/Fear: Hopeful that Lindsey made the right decision for her niece and fears the damage that Brooke will experience
3. INT. ARIZONA BEDROOM – DAY
Scene Arc: Clearly Lindsey is overwhelmed and grieving the loss of her mother, Sarah, as her daughter, Gracie walks on eggshells while she helps her sort things out “per the will”.
Essence: Lindsey is trying to stay in control, she avoids conversations and contact with everyone, Gracie strives to smooth things over.
Conflict: Lindsey isn’t fond of Dylan, Gracie’s significant other, Emma, Lindsey’s younger sister, picks through her mother’s belongings, the tension is very high with everyone.
Subtext: Lindsey is masking her pain with avoidance. There is an internal war going on in the family and she’s about to explode.
Hope/Fear: Hoping that Lindsey will find some peace but fear that if she has a breakdown, it will cause trouble in the family.
4. INT. SARAH’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Scene Arc: The packing is almost done, days have passed. Emma fills her vehicle as Lindsey quietly falls apart.
Essence: Lindsey begins her meltdown when Gracie discovers the box of her grandmother’s journals. Lindsey shuts down.
Conflict: Lindsey’s buttons are pushed to the limit. Gracie and Lindsey exchange words that put Lindsey in her place.
Subtext: The reality of being the next matriarch hits Lindsey hard. She doesn’t want responsibility.
Hope/Fear: Can Lindsey pull herself out of the rut? How will she deal with Sadie and Brooke? Fear that a family feud will break out.
5. INT. LINDSEY’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Scene Arc: Lindsey is so exhausted, falls asleep. Gracie’s in the kitchen cooking. Lindsey has a dream.
Essence: Somethings wrong with this picture when Gracie cooks. Brooke shows up unknown to Lindsey.
Conflict: The dream wakes Lindsey up. What was she dreaming? Is it really a dream when Brooke walks in.
Subtext: Lindsey is holding back her fears and tears. She’s not strong enough to deal with everyone’s emotions, like her mother did.
Hope/Fear: Hoping that Lindsey and Gracie can have a good conversation like she had with her mother. Can Lindsey let go of being in total control and become more understanding and kind?
6. INT. KITCHEN – NIGHT
Scene Arc: A big surprise, Brooke arrives in Arizona. Brooke confides in Gracie, the mother-daughter relationship isn’t working, Sadie sees Brooke as a carer and not a daughter.
Essence: Sadie has taken a turn or the worse. Brooke wants help but is afraid to ask Lindsey, aka “mom”.
Conflict: Lindsey becomes “Aunt Lindsey” for the first time in years. Lindsey must let go of being called mom if she goes to Oregon.
Subtext: Lindsey needs her sister as much as she needs Lindsey.
Hope/Fear: Is Lindsey going to go to Oregon? Will she refuse?
7. INT. GRACIE’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Scene Arc: Brooke spills the beans about her mom with Gracie; her illness, drugs, and becoming her caregiver.
Essence: More reality for Lindsey to face, her grief intensifies.
Conflict: Lindsey’s heart is breaking for Brooke. Lindsey must accept the change for everyone’s sake and answer to being Aunt Lindsey.
Subtext: Lindsey feels abandoned again.
Hope/Fear: Will Lindsey be strong enough to deal with Sadie and be the sister she once was? Or will Lindsey stay at home?
8. EXT. BACKYARD – DAY
Scene Arc: Lindsey has no one she can talk with.
Essence: Lindsey faces the reality of her losses as she goes through her mother’s journal.
Conflict: She hasn’t talked with her lifelong friend, Lauren, in months.
Subtext: She’s afraid to say I’m sorry.
Hope/Fear: Will Lindsey reach out to Lauren? Will she shut down even more?
9. INT. GRACIE’S BEDROOM – DAY
Scene Arc: Gracie brings out the journals that she’s hidden. They plan a trip for Gracie.
Essence: Gracie and Brooke go through the photos and journals. They discover that Gracie’s father left a suicide note to Sadie.
Conflict: Brooke is angry that information was withheld from her.
Subtext: Will Brooke confront her mother or will she ask Lindsey about her father?
Hope/Fear: Hope that Brooke begins to understand her mother’s pain or will she keep it buried?
10. INT. CAR – DAY
Scene Arc: Gracie and Brooke pick up Lindsey’s prescriptions, have a heavy conversation about what’s going on with Sadie and the toll of caring for her mother.
Essence: They both begin to see a bigger picture of Sadie.
Conflict: Brooke wants to be a daughter not her caregiver.
Subtext: Old wound surfaces for Brooke when she came to live with Lindsey.
Hope/Fear: Can she accept her mother as she is or is she afraid to ask her mother questions?
11. INT. GRACIE’S BEDROOM –
Scene Arc: Gracie and Brooke bring Lindsey into a conversation then inform her that it would be good if Gracie came with her to Oregon.
Essence: Brooke wants back up when she goes home. Lindsey needs time for herself.
Conflict: Lindsey is surprised when they have already purchased the flight for Gracie.
Subtext: Brooke needs Gracie’s help. Lindsey must take inventory of her needs and time alone is one.
Hope/Fear: Hope that all goes well and afraid of hearing the truth.
12. EXT. MEDFORD AIRPORT OREGON – DAY
The girls arrive, get into Brooke’s car and drive away.
INT. OREGON HOME – DAY
Scene Arc: Sadie is very surprised to see her niece. Sadie dismisses Brooke who leaves and goes to her home.
Essence: Shows the difference in the relationship between Sadie and Gracie and how Sadie dismisses Brooke.
Conflict: Sadie treats Brooke like her aid. Gracie receives affection from Sadie.
Subtext: Sadie is accepted by Gracie. Gracie relates to Sadie’s drug problem.
Hope/Fear: That Gracie gets to see how Sadie treats Brooke and fear it will cause more damage for Brooke.
13. INT. OREGON HOME – DAY
Scene Arc: Sadie’s vanity and drug usage surfaces in front of Gracie and a trip to the pharmacy, except Sadie backs the car into garage door.
Essence: Sadie’s drug use is exactly what Brooke shared, forcing Gracie to go to pharmacy alone.
Conflict: Gracie doesn’t know how to get to the pharmacy and very concerned with the amount of drugs Sadie already has.
Subtext: Gracie is seeing who her aunt really is and it scares her, as well as having feeling for Brooke.
Hope/Fear: Sadie slows down her drug use but afraid that something could go badly.
INT. PHARMACY – DAY
Scene Arc: Gracie can’t get one of the prescriptions. Calls Brooke for help. Gracie explains to Sadie and calms her down.
Essence: Everyone knows what a drug seeker Sadie is.
Conflict: Gracie is afraid her aunt will be upset.
Subtext: Gracie remembers her drug days.
Hope/Fear: Hope that Sadie’s actions don’t spark Gracie’s interest in drugs. Or, maybe Gracie will try Sadie’s drugs.
14. INT. OREGON HOME – NIGHT
Scene Arc: A power outage scares Sadie and forces Gracie to drive over to Brooke’s home in the pouring rain and hail. Sadie brings her stash of pills.
Essence: Sadie’s drugs are very important.
Conflict: The drugs spill all over the car. Gracie worries about the drugs if pulled over.
Subtext: Gracie is perplexed while Sadie finds it funny.
Hope/Fear: Will Gracie get pulled over or will she make it to Brooke’s.
15. INT. BROOKE’S HOME – DAY
Scene Arc: Sadie’s vanity, routine and selfishness surfaces. Brooke makes breakfast.
Essence: Sadie’s need to be in her home is more important than being with her daughter and acting as a family. and has her usual routine come before everything.
Conflict: Sadie demands to go home. Brooke’s feelings are hurt.
Subtext: Sadie wants everything her way. Gracie is seeing how Brooke is treated.
Hope/Fear: Will Sadie apologize and thank Brooke or will she continue to treat Brooke like her aid.
16. INT. OREGON HOME – DAY
Scene Arc: Brooke’s day begins with checking on Sadie’s drugs, pillbox is screwed up, Gracie sees her routine. Brooke has reports to get out to her employer and doesn’t have time to be with Gracie.
Essence: Gracie gets a full day from Brooke’s point of view.
Conflict: Sadie doesn’t want to be disturbed as she changes her bag but ends up needing Brooke’s help. Pills are in secret hiding places.
Subtext: Brooke is afraid to question her mother.
Hope/Fear: Hope Sadie’s attitude changes and Brooke is able to have a good conversation with Gracie’s help, but Brooke knows it won’t happen.
17. EXT. OREGON HOME – PORCH – DAY
Scene Arc: Day is done, Gracie brings out the two journals,
Essence: Brooke is exhausted and torn. Gracie shares information with Brooke about Colorectal Cancer. She’s even talked with new surgeons, new medical trials and lawyers about her botched surgery and to consider a malpractice lawsuit.
Conflict: Sadie will never file a lawsuit and doesn’t want any more medical help. Brooke is forced to tell Gracie exactly what Sadie’s intentions are.
Subtext: Lindsey is always looking out for Sadie. Brooke is forced to let Gracie know that Sadie is on palliative care and wants to go into hospice as soon as she can qualify.
Hope/Fear: She hopes that Sadie will listen to Gracie while Brooke knows Sadie’s real intentions. She wants to die on her terms.
18. EXT. ARIZONA HOME – DAY
BACKYARD
Scene Arc: Lindsey is still grieving over Gram and Sadie’s health. Gracie arrives back home via Lyft. Lindsey is very surprised. Gracie is happy to be home. Gracie returns the journals she secretly took.
Essence: Things really haven’t changed at home. Lindsey makes a new plan and shares with Gracie, but Gracie withholds what she’s experienced and learned.
Conflict: Items that were Sadie’s are missing. Is Lindsey ready to hear that Sadie wants to go into hospice and is presently in palliative care. She’s been left out of the loop.
Subtext: Gracie questions her thoughts about time shared with Sadie and what she knows.
Hope/Fear: Will Lindsey be able to handle Sadie’s wishes, and will it backfire if Gracie doesn’t let her know.
19. INT. ARIZONA HOME – DAY
BATHROOM
Scene Arc: Lindsey’s is going to with Sadie for a while. Gracie shares everything with Lindsey. Lindsey has moral issues but is still going to Oregon.
Essence: Lindsey needs her sister more than anything.
Conflict: Lindsey has mixed feelings about dying with dignity but thinks she can change her mind.
Subtext: Lindsey doesn’t believe Sadie and it’s all an act for attention.
Hope/Fear: Hoping Sadie will change her mind or tell the truth but she could be serious and it’s all about getting more drugs.
20. INT. MIKE’S TRUCK – DAY
MEDFORD AIRPORT
Scene Arc: Mike, a friend of her mother and sister, picks Lindsey up. Lindsey probes Mike on his position of dying with dignity since Oregon’s laws allow it. Mike is all for it.
Essence: Lindsey wants to know what Mike knows about Sadie’s health and drug use.
Conflict: Mike is all for assisted suicide but it’s a moral issue for Lindsey.
Subtext: She picks his brain to see how close Sadie and Mike are.
Hope/Fear: Lindsey believes she will change Sadie’s mind, but Mike is supportive of Sadie’s decision. After all he has ALS.
21. INT. OREGON HOME – DAY
Scene Arc: Lindsey arrives with Sadie’s warm embrace as tears stream down their faces. Sadie settles her in. Sadie demands Lindsey to take a sleeping pill and have a hit of a joint.
Essence: Sadie wants Lindsey to be drugged up like she is.
Conflict: Lindsey sleeps for two days, not to Lindsey’s liking.
Subtext: Sadie knows what’s best for everyone.
Hope/Fear: Lindsey will be pissed when she finally wakes but hope she doesn’t stir the pot.
22. INT./EXT OREGON HOME -DAY
Scene Arc: We see a week pass as Sadie and Lindsey do various things around the house.
Essence: How close are Lindsey and Sadie?
Conflict: Sadie doesn’t want to let Lindsey in on her medical status.
Subtext: Sadie is hiding the truth.
Hope/Fear: Hope that Sadie will trust Lindsey and fear an argument will happen.

• This reply was modified 9 months, 3 weeks ago by  jamie handley.
• This reply was modified 9 months, 3 weeks ago by  jamie handley.

[Sylvia Krawczyk]

WIM+AI – Module 4 – Lesson 10: Making Every Scene Fascinating
Sylvia’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!
What I learned from doing this assignment is…more ways to clarify and up the scenes. Also, the difficulty of AI. It took me 3 days as it kept logging me out. Also, it kept telling me I had too long a post. Last, it kept changing my prompt answers to different formats and going off in tangents. More reason that AI is an assistant and we need actual human writers!
My vision from this program is to challenge myself in my writing genre and write my most amazing script to date.
Scene 1
INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT
Description: Bad sex between Hope and Will. Will is mechanical as Hope lays bored.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): Hope and Will engage in uninspired intimacy. Hope’s blank stare contrasts Will’s perfunctory attempts, creating palpable discomfort.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Hope’s thoughts wander to Joy as she stares at the ceiling, questioning her emotions and the life she’s built with Will.
• Ending (Suspense): Will rolls over, indifferent, leaving Hope alone in her dissatisfaction. She clutches a tattered letter hidden under her pillow, hinting at her unresolved past.
Scene 2
INT. ART EXHIBIT – EVENING
Description: Hope showcases her older works, smiling. She looks at her wedding ring with a frown and carries a tattered letter. Many people are admiring her artistic ability. One confident woman especially.
• Beginning (Intrigue): The art exhibit is lively and sophisticated, with Hope receiving compliments on her work. A mysterious, confident woman catches her eye, observing Hope from a distance.
• Middle (Mystery): Hope grips her wedding ring, deep in thought, before quickly slipping the letter into her pocket when the woman approaches. Their brief exchange is layered with unspoken tension.
• Ending (Superior Position): The confident woman, revealed to be Joy, introduces herself as the new curator. The audience knows she has a history with Hope that is unknown to everyone else.
Scene 3
INT. ART EXHIBIT – CONT.
Description: Hope and Joy lock eyes and smile. The sight of Joy takes Hope's breath away. Joy is the new art curator that wants to exhibit Hope’s work. Hope rejects.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Hope notices Joy from across the room, and their locked eyes spark a mix of recognition and curiosity.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Joy approaches Hope, commenting on her work with subtle flattery while bringing up their shared history, creating tension.
• Ending (Mislead/Reveal): Joy offers to curate Hope’s next exhibit, but Hope declines, masking her unease with a polite smile.
Scene 4
EXT. ART EXHIBIT – CONT.
Description: Joy lights up a cigarette. Will runs late to Joy’s art exhibit. Will is charming to all others and cold to Hope. Hope sees a cryptic text on Will’s phone.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): Outside the exhibit, Joy’s confident demeanor contrasts with Hope’s visible discomfort as they converse under the flickering streetlights.
• Middle (Mystery): Will arrives late, greets everyone warmly except Hope, and his secretive behavior piques suspicion.
• Ending (Suspense): Hope glimpses a cryptic text on Will’s phone, heightening her unease as he quickly locks the screen.
Scene 5
EXT. MEN'S RESTROOM – CONT.
Description: Will primps himself in the men’s room and takes off his wedding band.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Will stares at himself in the mirror, fidgeting with his tie as he prepares for something unsaid.
• Middle (Intrigue): He adjusts his appearance meticulously, muttering under his breath about “keeping things clean.”
• Ending (Major Twist): Will removes his wedding ring, slipping it into his pocket before exiting with a steely determination.
Scene 6
EXT. ART EXHIBIT – CONT.
Description: Will sneaks out of the art exhibit. Will texts Hope that he had to go and couldn’t get their groceries.
• Beginning (Suspense): Will slips out through a side door, glancing around nervously to ensure no one sees him.
• Middle (Betrayal): He texts Hope an excuse, while calling someone else with a smile that suggests a hidden agenda.
• Ending (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with Will walking into a shadowed alley, disappearing from view.
Scene 7
INT. ART EXHIBIT – CONT.
Description: Joy comforts Hope after Will’s betrayal.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): Hope stands awkwardly alone, fielding sympathetic smiles from guests after Will’s departure.
• Middle (Superior Position): Joy approaches with calculated concern, offering kind words while subtly planting seeds of doubt about Will.
• Ending (Intrigue): Hope reluctantly opens up, and Joy’s smile hints at deeper motives as she offers support.
Scene 7.1
INT. ART EXHIBIT – CONT.
Description: A suspicious fire breaks out. As chaos ensues, Hope instinctively tries to protect her art. Joy reappears, saving Hope.
• Beginning (Suspense): Guests notice smoke curling into the room, and panic spreads as the fire alarm blares.
• Middle (Uncertainty): Hope hesitates between saving herself or her work, ultimately rushing to protect her art.
• Ending (Hero Moment): Joy pulls Hope away from the danger, cementing herself as Hope’s savior amidst the chaos.
Scene 8
EXT. ART EXHIBIT – CONT.
Description: Joy tells Hope she’s changed—a better person—and wants to help Hope rediscover her voice. Joy insists she curate Hope’s next exhibit to make the monies for the repairs. Hope reluctantly agrees.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Joy offers Hope a cigarette, feigning nonchalance while observing Hope’s shaken demeanor.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Hope wrestles with guilt over her financial losses and doubt about Joy’s intentions but feels cornered into agreeing.
• Ending (Mislead/Reveal): Joy’s triumphant smile is hidden as Hope accepts her offer.
Scene 9
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – DAY
Description: Hope struggles to create new art. She stares at a blank canvas, overwhelmed by her stagnant creativity.
• Beginning (Uncertainty): Hope sets up her materials, trying to channel inspiration, but the canvas looms ominously blank.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Flashbacks of the fire and her marital troubles swirl in her mind, blocking her creativity.
• Ending (Mystery): She leaves the studio with a defeated sigh, leaving behind an empty canvas and unanswered questions.
Scene 10
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – CONT.
Description: Joy visits Hope’s studio. She critiques Hope’s current work, subtly undermining her confidence by being passive-aggressive.
• Beginning (Superior Position): Joy enters, immediately scanning Hope’s unfinished work with a neutral expression, hiding her true thoughts.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Her critiques begin as helpful but turn passive-aggressive, eroding Hope’s confidence.
• Ending (Intrigue): Joy suggests bold changes, claiming to “see potential,” leaving Hope confused and questioning herself.
Scene 11
INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Description: Hope meets Joy for dinner. The atmosphere is charged with sexual tension as they reminisce about their past relationship.
• Beginning (Intrigue): The women exchange pleasantries, but their lingering gazes hint at deeper feelings.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Their conversation turns personal, and Joy’s playful touches and suggestive remarks heighten the tension.
• Ending (Mislead/Reveal): Hope blushes as Joy leans in close, but Joy abruptly changes the subject, leaving Hope flustered.
Scene 12
INT. HOPE’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
Description: Hope stares at her wedding ring in bed while thinking about Joy. She takes the ring off and hides it in a drawer.
• Beginning (Suspense): Hope twists her wedding ring absentmindedly while staring into the dark.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Thoughts of Joy clash with memories of her failing marriage, pushing her to a decision.
• Ending (Uncertainty): She slips the ring into a drawer, its absence feeling both freeing and foreboding.
Scene 12.1
INT. BEDROOM – CONT.
Description: Hope stumbles upon evidence of Will’s affair with someone.
• Beginning (Superior Position): Hope rummages through a drawer, searching for something unrelated, as the audience notices an incriminating letter.
• Middle (Suspense): Her hands tremble as she reads the letter, realizing its implications.
• Ending (Cliffhanger): The scene ends with her staring at the letter in shock, her next move uncertain.
Scene 13
EXT. ART EXHIBIT – NIGHT
Description: Will arrives at another one of Hope’s events late and drunk. He avoids Hope and engages in conversation with Michael, becoming overly familiar and flirtatious.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): Will stumbles into the exhibit, drawing glances from attendees who whisper about his disheveled appearance.
• Middle (Betrayal): His behavior with Michael becomes inappropriately intimate, sparking rumors.
• Ending (Superior Position): Hope watches from a distance, her expression darkening as she pieces things together.
Scene 14
INT. ART EXHIBIT – LATER
Description: Hope confronts Will about his behavior. Will deflects and dismisses her concerns.
• Beginning (Uncomfortable Moment): Hope corners Will near the bar, her voice low but angry as she demands answers.
• Middle (Misinterpretation): Will accuses Hope of being paranoid and dramatic, skillfully deflecting her accusations.
• Ending (Cliffhanger): Hope storms off, unresolved tension hanging heavily in the air.
Scene 15
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – NIGHT
Description: Hope, emotionally drained, tries to paint but ends up staring blankly at the canvas. Joy sends her a cryptic text: “I can make it all better.”
• Beginning (Suspense): Hope grips her paintbrush tightly, trying to pour her feelings into the canvas, but nothing comes.
• Middle (Mystery): Her phone buzzes with Joy’s cryptic text, its tone both comforting and ominous.
• Ending (Uncertainty): She stares at her phone, torn between replying and ignoring it.
Scene 16
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – NIGHT (LATER)
Description: Hope responds to Joy’s text, agreeing to meet. She closes her phone and gazes at her unfinished work, feeling a mix of dread and excitement.
• Beginning (Suspense): Hope hesitates before typing a response, her fingers hovering over the keyboard.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): She rereads the message multiple times, second-guessing herself.
• Ending (Cliffhanger): She sends the message, the sound of the sent notification echoing in the silence.
Scene 17
INT. RESTAURANT – NIGHT
Description: Hope and Joy meet for dinner. Joy is charismatic, seductive, and presses Hope about taking bold risks in her art. The conversation is flirtatious, but there’s an underlying tension.
• Beginning: More interesting setting: The restaurant is upscale but dimly lit, with an abstract painting on the wall mirroring Hope's work. Joy playfully critiques it as "safe," setting the tone for their power play.
• Middle: Uncomfortable moment: Joy leans in, her words dripping with seduction, as she challenges Hope’s artistic choices, subtly questioning her courage. Hope shifts in her chair, struggling between attraction and irritation.
• Ending: Intrigue: Joy leaves Hope with a pointed statement: “Sometimes you have to burn the past to paint the future,” leaving Hope pondering whether it’s encouragement or manipulation.
Scene 18
INT. WILL’S OFFICE – DAY
Description: Will is at work, visibly stressed. He exchanges flirtatious texts with Michael, his tension easing into relief as they plan to meet later. He ignores Hope’s calls.
• Beginning: Superior position: The audience knows about Will’s affair with Michael, but Hope’s incoming call makes us wonder if she suspects it. Will’s agitation heightens suspense.
• Middle: Mislead / Reveal: Will stares at his phone, pretending to be preoccupied with work, but the reveal comes as he eagerly responds to Michael’s suggestive text, his demeanor softening.
• Ending: Mystery: Will’s phone buzzes again, and he smirks. We don’t see the message, but it’s clear his secret life continues to grow, leaving us wondering how long he can keep it hidden.
Scene 19
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – DAY
Description: Hope works on a new piece, inspired by Joy’s push for boldness. The painting is raw, chaotic, and aggressive, reflecting her inner turmoil. Joy is the naked subject. She praises Hope’s work, calling it a breakthrough.
• Beginning: More interesting setting: In Hope’s chaotic studio, cluttered with past failures and discarded ideas, she begins painting Joy, the raw intensity of her brushstrokes contrasting with the calm sunlight streaming through the windows.
• Middle: Internal Dilemma: As Hope paints, she feels torn between trusting Joy’s praise and sensing an underlying manipulation. Joy, lounging naked, subtly suggests Hope has never been this bold before, forcing Hope to question her authenticity.
• Ending: Intrigue: Joy casually places a hand on one of Hope’s earlier discarded works, hinting that she sees value in it while emphasizing her control over Hope’s artistic direction.
Scene 20
INT. GALLERY – DAY
Description: Hope’s new paintings are displayed at a private showing organized by Joy. The crowd admires her boldness, but Hope feels disconnected from her work. One painting is of Joy in a seductive pose. Joy basks in the praise.
• Beginning: Suspense: The private showing begins with hushed conversations as attendees approach Hope’s bold new pieces. They pause, mesmerized by the provocative painting of Joy, setting Hope on edge.
• Middle: Misinterpretation: Guests interpret Hope’s work as a reflection of Joy’s influence, praising Joy as her muse. Hope forces a smile but internally questions whether her work is even hers anymore.
• Ending: Betrayal: Joy takes credit for “pushing” Hope into this breakthrough in a toast, leaving Hope feeling overshadowed and used.
Scene 21
EXT. HOPE’S GALLERY – NIGHT
Description: Hope steps outside for air, overwhelmed by the success of the exhibit and her growing doubts about Joy’s role in her life. She notices Will arriving late again, this time with Michael. Will dismisses Hope. Michael is supportive of Hope, which angers Will.
• Beginning: Uncomfortable Moment: Hope leans against the gallery wall, her breathing uneven as she processes the praise and her doubts. Will arrives late, brushing past her without apology.
• Middle: Superior Position: Hope notices Will’s furtive glances toward Michael, sensing their closeness but not fully understanding it yet. Michael warmly compliments Hope’s exhibit, only adding to her confusion.
• Ending: Betrayal: Will coldly dismisses Hope’s unease with an offhand comment, leaving her feeling unsupported, while Michael offers her a meaningful look that hints at deeper truths.
Scene 22
INT. GALLERY – NIGHT
Hope confronts Will about his relationship with Michael. Will tries to deflect, but Hope demands answers. The confrontation escalates, leaving both feeling raw and exposed.
• Beginning: Suspense: Hope observes Will nervously avoiding eye contact as they walk through the gallery after hours. She asks a pointed question about Michael, her tone calm but unnerving.
• Middle: Betrayal: Will dismisses Hope’s accusation, but when she produces a receipt that proves his connection to Michael, his façade cracks. Hope presses harder, her voice rising, while Will struggles to maintain composure.
• Ending: Cliffhanger: Will storms out of the gallery, refusing to give Hope the answers she demands, leaving her standing alone, furious and devastated.
Scene 23
INT. JOY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Hope arrives at Joy’s apartment, emotionally distraught. She seeks comfort from Joy, but Joy sees this as an opportunity to further manipulate her.
• Beginning: More Interesting Setting: Joy’s apartment is meticulously decorated with her curated collection of art. Hope’s disheveled appearance contrasts starkly with the polished environment, immediately setting her on edge.
• Middle: Intrigue: Joy consoles Hope, asking probing questions about her confrontation with Will. She offers support but shifts the blame subtly, planting the idea that Hope has been too forgiving.
• Ending: Mislead/Reveal: Joy hugs Hope warmly, her face hidden, but her eyes glint with satisfaction, hinting at her ulterior motives as Hope begins to trust her again.
Scene 24
INT. JOY’S APARTMENT – LATER THAT NIGHT
Hope stays over at Joy’s apartment. The atmosphere is intimate but unsettling. They drink wine, and the tension between them grows. Joy continues to subtly criticize Hope’s past choices while praising her current direction.
• Beginning: Uncomfortable Moment: Joy hands Hope a glass of wine, commenting on how “different” she looks from her younger self, stirring feelings of insecurity in Hope.
• Middle: Character Changes Radically: Joy reminisces about their shared past but shifts to critique Hope’s decisions since then. Her tone changes, veering from warm to cold, keeping Hope off balance.
• Ending: Suspense: As the night deepens, Hope grows more introspective while Joy leans in closer, her smile predatory. Hope senses the tension but is too vulnerable to act on her instincts.
Scene 25
INT. WILL’S OFFICE – DAY
Will meets Michael for lunch in his office. Their conversation is casual but increasingly tense as they discuss the future of their relationship.
• Beginning: Mystery: Michael brings lunch, mentioning something cryptic about their “future.” Will freezes, unsure how much Michael intends to push their relationship forward.
• Middle: External Dilemma: Michael presses Will to leave Hope, arguing they can’t continue in secrecy. Will hesitates, torn between protecting his image and pursuing what he wants.
• Ending: Cliffhanger: Michael stands to leave, saying, “If you won’t choose, I will.” Will’s panic rises as he watches him go, uncertain of what Michael might do next.
Scene 26
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – DAY
Hope tries to work on a new painting but feels blocked. The pressure from Joy’s expectations and her unraveling personal life weighs heavily on her.
• Beginning: Misinterpretation: Hope stares at her blank canvas, imagining Joy’s voice criticizing her, though it’s only in her mind. She flinches, feeling inadequate.
• Middle: Internal Dilemma: Hope debates whether she’s pursuing art for herself or living up to Joy’s expectations. Her creative block deepens as her emotions swirl.
• Ending: Surprise: Her phone rings—it’s her brother. His vague comments about Will push her emotional turmoil to the brink, leaving her paralyzed.
Scene 26.1
INT. HOPE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Hope acts suspicious, while Will panics internally, fearing she’ll discover his affair with her brother.
• Beginning: Superior Position: Hope quietly watches Will fumble with his phone, unaware that she already suspects him.
• Middle: Intrigue: Will stammers through excuses, trying to gauge how much Hope knows. She toys with him, asking indirect questions.
• Ending: Suspense: Hope leaves the room suddenly, leaving Will with his heart pounding, unsure if she knows the truth.
Scene 27
INT. HOPE’S APARTMENT – CONT.
Hope confronts Will about the affair with her brother.
• Beginning: Uncomfortable Moment: Hope throws her brother’s name into the conversation. Will freezes mid-sentence, realizing he’s been caught.
• Middle: Betrayal: Hope forces him to admit the affair, her voice shaking with anger and pain. Will tries to justify himself, but his excuses only deepen her hurt.
• Ending: Cliffhanger: Hope walks out of the room, leaving Will shattered as he faces the gravity of his actions.
Scene 28
EXT. STREET – NIGHT
Hope walks aimlessly through the city after her confrontation with Will.
• Beginning: More Interesting Setting: The city is dark and desolate, the streets eerily quiet. Hope wanders, feeling utterly alone.
• Middle: Suspense: A shadowy figure follows her briefly but disappears. Hope’s anxiety mirrors her inner turmoil.
• Ending: Cliffhanger: She reaches Joy’s apartment door, hesitating before knocking, unsure if she’s making the right choice.
Scene 29
INT. JOY’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Hope and Joy drink wine. Hope opens up about her confrontation with Will.
• Beginning: Mislead/Reveal: Joy feigns shock and concern as Hope recounts the betrayal, but her subtle comments shift the blame onto Hope.
• Middle: Intrigue: Joy leans in, her tone shifting to one of intimate understanding, encouraging Hope to see herself as the victim.
• Ending: Suspense: Their eyes meet, and Joy’s hand lingers on Hope’s shoulder. The tension builds as Hope wonders if she can truly trust Joy.
Scene 29.1
INT. COURTROOM – DAY
Hope sits in the courtroom watching Will as a confident lawyer. He charms everyone until he sees Hope. He walks past Hope and tells Michael they need to meet for a meeting in his office. Hope cold stares Will as she exits.
Beginning: Superior Position: Will confidently charms the court, unaware that Hope is observing him critically from the back.
Middle: Intrigue: Michael approaches Will during a recess. Their interaction is quiet and loaded with tension, suggesting secrets Hope doesn’t yet fully grasp.
Ending: Uncomfortable Moment: Hope confronts Will with a cold stare as he passes her, the weight of his double life pressing visibly on him.
Scene 29.2
EXT. COURTROOM – DAY
Joy meets up with Hope. Joy acts surprised as Hope confesses that she’s ready to leave Will, her life is a sham. Hope hands Joy a small artwork.
Beginning: Misinterpretation: Joy arrives, pretending she’s there by coincidence, feigning concern for Hope.
Middle: Intrigue: Hope confesses her doubts about her marriage, handing Joy the small artwork as a token of trust.
Ending: Superior Position: Joy hides her satisfaction as she realizes she’s gaining deeper control over Hope’s personal and professional decisions.
Scene 29.3
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – NEXT DAY
Hope notices Joy made subtle changes to her artwork. Joy insists it’s for the better, and Hope, feeling insecure, agrees despite her instincts. She gives Joy control of her old and new artwork.
Beginning: Uncertainty: Hope is unsure about Joy’s input on her work but hesitates to speak out.
Middle: Betrayal: Joy suggests that the changes reflect Hope’s “new vision,” subtly manipulating her into submission.
Ending: Internal Dilemma: Hope reluctantly agrees to hand over control of her artwork, caught between self-doubt and her reliance on Joy’s approval.
Scene 29.4
INT. BEDROOM – EVENING
Hope struggles with confronting Will’s affair.
Beginning: Suspense: Hope sifts through clues, piecing together inconsistencies in Will’s behavior.
Middle: Internal Dilemma: She battles between wanting to confront him and fearing the truth will break her further.
Ending: Cliffhanger: Hope resolves to bring up her suspicions, setting the stage for an inevitable confrontation.
Scene 29.5
INT. LIVING ROOM – CONT.
Phone call: Joy and Will are secretly plotting to control Hope’s career and assets. Hope overhears arguing—doesn’t know about what.
Beginning: Suspense: Hope hears raised voices and moves closer, eavesdropping on the heated conversation.
Middle: Mislead/Reveal: She picks up fragmented dialogue, mistaking their argument as professional tension rather than personal betrayal.
Ending: Cliffhanger: The call abruptly ends, leaving Hope with more questions than answers.
Scene 29.6
INT. JOY’S STUDIO – MORNING
Hope and Joy become romantically involved, and Hope begins working on new, daring artwork with Joy’s encouragement. Joy presents herself as Hope’s collaborator and emotional muse, but she secretly manipulates Hope’s work for her own gain. The lines between love and manipulation blur.
Beginning: Uncertainty: Joy seduces Hope into a deeper emotional and creative connection.
Middle: Intrigue: Joy positions herself as Hope’s artistic equal while making subtle moves to control her work.
Ending: Betrayal: Joy makes small, unnoticed alterations to Hope’s latest piece, solidifying her manipulation.
Scene 29.7
INT. NEW ART EXHIBIT – SATURDAY EVENING
Hope attends her art show to see one of her pieces presented as Joy’s work. Joy is basking in the praise, while Hope is left stunned. Joy begins a takeover, subtly crediting herself for Hope’s creativity, while positioning Hope as emotionally unstable.
Beginning: Major Twist: Hope enters the exhibit to find her work being claimed by Joy.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Guests approach Joy to praise “her” genius, ignoring Hope’s visible discomfort.
Ending: Suspense: Hope confronts Joy, but Joy gaslights her in front of the crowd, further isolating Hope.
Scene 29.8
INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT
Hope discovers Will in bed with her brother Michael, confirming his betrayal. Blowout confrontation.
Beginning: Surprise: Hope bursts into the room, finding Will and Michael together.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: The confrontation turns into a raw, emotional outpouring, exposing layers of betrayal.
Ending: Cliffhanger: Hope storms out, leaving Will and Michael to deal with the fallout.
Scene 29.9
INT. JOY’S STUDIO – NIGHT
Hope buries herself deeper into her relationship with Joy, feeling even more dependent on her for emotional and creative validation.
Beginning: Intrigue: Joy comforts Hope, subtly reinforcing her dependence.
Middle: Mislead/Reveal: Joy masks her manipulation with genuine-seeming affection, deepening Hope’s trust.
Ending: Suspense: Hope commits to staying with Joy, unaware of her ulterior motives.
Scene 29.10
INT. COURTHOUSE HALLWAY – DAY
Hope seeks legal advice against Joy and Will. A lawyer warns her about Joy's strong connections in the art world and her husband’s influence as a legal professional. Hope realizes the stakes are higher than she imagined.
Beginning: Suspense: Hope nervously explains her situation to a lawyer, hoping for clarity.
Middle: Mislead/Reveal: The lawyer points out that Joy and Will’s combined influence makes a legal battle risky, leaving Hope disheartened.
Ending: Cliffhanger: Hope decides to start gathering evidence herself, marking a shift in her resolve.
Scene 29.11
INT. HOPE’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Hope searches through Joy’s emails and uncovers documents that confirm Joy has been selling her artwork under Joy’s name. She also finds correspondence between Joy and Will conspiring to institutionalize Hope under claims of emotional instability.
Beginning: Major Twist: Hope stumbles upon the emails while looking for something unrelated.
Middle: Betrayal: The correspondence between Joy and Will reveals their betrayal in stark detail.
Ending: Cliffhanger: Hope realizes she must act quickly before Joy and Will execute their plan.
Scene 29.12
INT. JOY’S STUDIO – EARLY MORNING
Hope confronts Joy about the emails, but Joy denies everything and turns the blame on Hope, painting her as paranoid. Hope leaves, visibly shaken but determined.
Beginning: Suspense: Hope approaches Joy’s studio, rehearsing what she’ll say.
Middle: Uncomfortable Moment: Joy masterfully gaslights Hope, leaving her doubting herself.
Ending: Resolution: Hope steels herself, vowing to find undeniable proof.
Scene 29.13
INT. PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR’S OFFICE – DAY
Hope hires a private investigator to gather evidence against Joy and Will. The investigator advises her to tread carefully, given the power and connections her adversaries have.
Beginning: Mislead/Reveal: The investigator questions if Hope is ready for the fallout of exposing Joy and Will.
Middle: Suspense: Hope provides him with the documents she’s found and explains her suspicions.
Ending: Resolution: The investigator agrees to take the case, promising to dig deeper.
Scene 29.14
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – NIGHT
Hope works on a series of pieces inspired by her pain and betrayal, rediscovering her artistic voice. The pieces are raw and unapologetic, unlike anything she’s ever done before.
Beginning: Internal Dilemma: Hope struggles to channel her emotions into her art.
Middle: Resolution: As the pieces take form, she begins to feel a sense of empowerment.
Ending: Superior Position: Hope decides to debut this series independently, without Joy’s involvement.
Scene 29.15
INT. ART GALLERY – NIGHT
Hope secretly presents her new series under a pseudonym at a small gallery, bypassing Joy entirely. The show is a success, and Joy’s influence over Hope begins to wane.
Beginning: Major Twist: The art world buzzes about the mysterious new artist, unaware it’s Hope.
Middle: Intrigue: Joy arrives at the gallery, suspecting the work might be Hope’s.
Ending: Cliffhanger: Joy confronts the gallery owner, demanding to know the artist’s identity.
Scene 29.16
INT. INVESTIGATOR’S OFFICE – DAY
The investigator presents Hope with damning evidence: financial records showing Joy profiting from Hope’s work and documents tying Will to Joy’s schemes.
Beginning: Major Reveal: The investigator lays out the evidence, confirming Hope’s suspicions.
Middle: Suspense: Hope realizes this is enough to take legal action, but the risk of public fallout looms.
Ending: Resolution: Hope decides to confront Joy and Will head-on.
Scene 29.17
INT. COURTROOM – DAY
Hope testifies in court, presenting the evidence against Joy and Will. The courtroom drama unfolds as Joy’s lies unravel under cross-examination.
Beginning: Suspense: Hope nervously takes the stand, facing Joy and Will.
Middle: Major Twist: Joy falters under cross-examination, her carefully constructed narrative falling apart.
Ending: Resolution: The court rules in Hope’s favor, stripping Joy of her influence and exposing Will’s betrayal publicly.
Scene 29.18
INT. HOPE’S STUDIO – DAY
Hope returns to her studio, finally at peace. She begins a new painting, symbolizing her renewed sense of identity and emotional freedom.
Beginning: Superior Position: Hope reflects on how far she’s come, finding strength in her solitude.
Middle: Resolution: She paints with newfound clarity, her strokes confident and bold.
Ending: Final Image: The painting, vibrant and full of life, mirrors Hope’s transformation.
Scene 29.19
INT. HOPE'S STUDIO – DAY
Hope confronts the art dealer, learning of his betrayal and involvement in the gallery fire. This moment ignites her resolve to fight back.
• Beginning (Intrigue): The art dealer arrives unexpectedly, bringing an ominous presence into Hope’s creative space. He reveals subtle hints about Joy’s larger scheme, making Hope realize how deep the conspiracy runs.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): The dealer taunts Hope, questioning her talent and threatening her future if she exposes Joy. He smugly claims credit for the fire as a necessary evil to "motivate" her.
• Ending (Surprise): Hope punches him in the face, breaking her usual restrained demeanor. She slams the door behind him, fueled by the anger and determination she needs to take Joy down.
Scene 29.20
INT. COURTROOM – NEXT WEEK
Hope uses forensic art evidence to prove Joy’s fraud, revealing a shocking truth to the court.
• Beginning (Suspense): Hope sits calmly while Joy spins her lies to the court. The tension builds as the judge scrutinizes the claims.
• Middle (Mislead/Reveal): Hope dramatically unveils the forensic evidence—a hidden signature beneath the paint layers of the contested pieces. The courtroom reacts with shock as the deception is laid bare.
• Ending (Cliffhanger): Joy’s confident mask cracks as the evidence stacks against her. The judge announces an upcoming decision, leaving the tension unresolved.
Scene 30
INT. COURTROOM – CONT.
The climactic confrontation between Hope and Joy over their identities and futures.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): The courtroom transforms into a symbolic battleground, with Hope standing her ground against Joy’s verbal attacks and false tears.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): Hope must decide whether to hold back and preserve her reputation or fully expose Joy, risking her vulnerabilities being used against her. She chooses to push forward.
• Ending (Superior Position): Hope delivers a cutting truth about their relationship and Joy’s theft of her identity, not just her art. Joy’s inability to counter leaves the court with no doubt about her guilt.
Scene 31
EXT. COURTHOUSE – DAY
Hope emerges victorious but emotionally changed, ready to rebuild her life.
• Beginning (Suspense): Hope walks down the courthouse steps, scanning the crowd for familiar faces, unsure if her personal life will ever be the same.
• Middle (Uncertainty): The crowd cheers, but Hope feels the weight of what she’s lost—trust, relationships, and time. A glance at Will signals their unspoken understanding of their broken bond.
• Ending (Surprise): Joy, defeated but defiant, skips down the stairs and kicks Will in the groin before storming off. The absurdity adds a moment of catharsis for Hope.
Scene 32
INT. HOPE'S STUDIO – DAY
Hope reconnects with her art, taking the first steps toward healing.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): Hope enters her studio, which looks like a battlefield of unfinished pieces and broken tools, mirroring her inner turmoil.
• Middle (Internal Dilemma): She hesitates to pick up a brush, grappling with fear of failure and the need to reclaim her identity. She finally begins painting.
• Ending (Character Changes Radically): Her brushstrokes grow bolder, reflecting a newfound confidence. She transforms from a victim into an empowered artist.
Scene 33
EXT. ART GALLERY – NIGHT
Hope’s triumphant exhibit showcases her rebirth as an artist.
• Beginning (Mystery): Guests marvel at Hope’s latest work, which contains cryptic imagery tied to her journey. Whispers ripple through the crowd about its meaning.
• Middle (Intrigue): Hope watches from the shadows, content to let her art take center stage. Will arrives but keeps his distance, silently acknowledging her growth.
• Ending (Surprise): Hope leaves unnoticed, slipping away into the night with a quiet smile, free from needing external validation.
Scene 34
EXT. CITY STREET – NIGHT
Hope walks through the city, embodying her newfound freedom.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): The bustling city contrasts with Hope’s calm demeanor as she strides purposefully, her freedom evident in her every move.
• Middle (Suspense): She bumps into a mysterious woman from her exhibit. Their conversation hints at future opportunities or connections, leaving Hope curious but cautious.
• Ending (Uncertainty): As Hope gazes at the night sky, the woman’s departure leaves an air of possibility, setting up potential new paths for her journey.
Scene 35
INT. HOPE'S STUDIO – DAY
Hope completes a masterpiece that embodies her journey and triumph.
• Beginning (Intrigue): Hope stands before a half-finished canvas, staring at it as if searching for answers.
• Middle (Major Twist): Her strokes become freer, blending colors and textures she’s never used before. The final piece is bold and unprecedented.
• Ending (Mystery): She steps back, brushing her hand across the vibrant surface. The painting hints at her struggles but also her newfound strength, leaving its full meaning open to interpretation.
Scene 36
EXT. PICTURESQUE OUTDOORS – 6 MONTHS LATER
Hope paints in nature, free and inspired, sharing intimacy with a new romantic interest.
• Beginning (More Interesting Setting): Hope’s outdoor studio is surrounded by lush greenery and vibrant colors, a stark contrast to her previous sterile environments.
• Middle (Uncomfortable Moment): Her new companion flirts as Hope paints, creating a mix of vulnerability and excitement in their dynamic.
• Ending (Surprise): Hope laughs as birds take flight in the distance, her brushstrokes full of life. The sunset casts a golden glow, signaling her emotional and creative liberation.