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Lesson 11
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12 Replies
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Chris’s Outline to script.
What I’ve learned doing this assignment: the over reliance and over valuing of the outline is frustrating. I have been adding/subtracting directly to scenes in my script all along. When I see the need for a change (elevating character profiles, enhancing conventions of drama, adding interest techniques), I don’t like to wait to make the changes to my script.
I use an outline (index cards) when composing the first draft. It is a good guide, keeps things in order. A vehicle to manage changes. But waiting till Lesson 11 to begin to merge the outline with the script is a frustrating delay. At least for me.
I don’t see the script changes I’ve made to date as perfect. But they are a start, and more complete than an item from the outline. I am sure they will improve through the next series of lessons.
I do appreciate the use of outlines in the structure of this class. Particularly in Lesson 10 where we exchange outlines. I only question the value in the overall rewrite process.
My script has a total of 93 scenes.
My outline covers 38 scenes/sequences.
I have one scene that is completely new.
I deleted one sequence.
I made changes to 17 scènes/sequence.
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I feel you. I think the outline magnifies story problems and you didn’t have a lot of those. I think some writers have a harder time with structure and others are more natural at it. I’m just now adding my changes to my script and it’s a lot of work!
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Lora’s outline to script!
I learned that I can rewrite which I had doubts about.
I tweaked almost the whole script to match the reordering of scenes that I did. Lost count of the number of scened I changed.
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This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by Lora Sester.
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This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by Lora Sester.
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Keep at it. There’s a really cool story in there 👍
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This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by
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Bill,s Outline to Script Learned: Yes, I can write right after hernia surgery. The pen always wins. Seriously, I went back and indeed made changes per this lesson and the video preceeding. My screenplay ” Cane” comes out at 120 pages. I am attempting economazation by virtue of this lesson. At 100k per page it is essential to say it best and quickest. Lengthy scripts may be discarded immediately. One item lacking was my failure to introduce the Antagonist early on, say by page 11. I often refere to earlier lessons with ScreewU including this class. The late Syd Field,s book has become a quasi Bible of sorts. For my current script: Totally eliminated 4 scenes. If they do not advance either the story or a specific character, they must be removed. I made improvements to 9 scenes by following the 2 rules above. What is really interesting is the addition of 6 new scenes via economization. The script is actually 11 pages shorter
I believe by the end of this Rewrite Class “Cane” will be shorter still.
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Lesson 11
Deanne’s Outline to Script
What I learned = feedback is helpful to identify important plot details left out of the outline.
New scenes – 2 Changed scenes = 5
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Zenna Davis-Jones OUTLINE TO SCRIPT
What i learned: a lot of the scenes had to be taken out because of changes made to the outline. While I liked the scene and the characters they didn’t move the story forward anymore.
I learned that it doesn’t have to be perfect but just keep chipping away and eventually the story will get good! just don’t stop moving.
I learned that there is some resistance to calling it a first draft! Because I feel so much work has already gone into it. But i understand the idea that this new way to tell the story is the first time I’ve done so. I’m excited to keep going.
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Outline to Script. Margaret Doner Love and Destiny
Doing the outline and comparing it to the script showed me where I needed to ADD scenes for clarity. I know I still need some more work in that area, but it’s come a long way from the beginning. I added 3 new scenes and I changed 4 scenes.
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Elizabeth Cochrell’s outline to script.
What I learned is that feedback from different genders and personalities refreshes my interest in the story again and the changes gave it more complexity of emotions and meaning.
Thanks Lora and James!
The main changes are:
*Misha learns to be more empathetic through Rebecca’s positive spirit and has more compassion for Rebecca’s suffering at Emily’s cold hearted treatment.
*Misha goal for being a good mother now has more depth.
*I also and added more fun and humor.
*I subtracted 2 scenes which didn’t move the story forward.
*I created 4 new scenes to add more depth and purpose for Misha the main character.
I’m most proud of where Misha teaches a fun kickboxing class to kids and when one of the mothers picks up her cute son, Misha see’s she has been beaten, which makes Misha goal of opening a women’s shelter more meaningful.
*I also changed scenes where Emily bully’s Rebecca towards the end, the teen fights back with the skills she learned from Misha which gives her more of a character arc.
Now I think I will need to trim it down but that’s easier than trying to make it more entertaining!
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What i learned from doing this assignment is how many changes I found that improve the script (the script that I previously thought was near-perfect).
I wrote 6 or 7 entirely new scenes. I rewrote parts of perhaps a dozen (out of 53). I deleted parts of scenes that did not move the story forward or contained too much dialogue that could be replaced by actions of expressions of the characters.
And I see that there are still portions of the script I don’t like. Still more work to go.
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Day 11:
James’ Outline to Script!
What I learned from doing this assignment is…I was able to combine scenes which made the script tighter with no repetition story elements. This opened up “space” to develop subplots that were not in the script previously adding more depth.
This process also made the theme become clearer as the characters and their actions now serve a specific purpose giving rise to questions: will searching for love ever bear fruit? Can one’s past adversely affect our present relationships? Can we overcome that past? Does it matter what our past is? Can one really learn from it?
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Ed’s Scene Ratings
What I learned from this lesson: Yes, indeedy, some of the scenes aren’t as entertaining as I’d like them to be. Most of the low-rated scenes are in Act 3 and the start of Act 4. I haven’t fixed them yet, as I already knew these scenes had to be worked on and I wanted to reassess the lead-up scenes before revising these.
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