• David Wickenden

    Member
    October 3, 2023 at 5:29 pm

    David Wickenden Query Letter Draft One

    Dear Producer

    It’s hard enough to get away with murdering child abusers without having your best friend hunting for you.

    Laura, a driven psychiatrist, has firsthand experienced of the damage left behind by child abusers. She learned to fight from the people she serves, cops and the military. Laura begins a crusade to bring real justice to those who hurt children. But now her best friend and RCMP officer Janice is tasked with hunting her down.

    When the guilty have more rights than the innocent, what options are left?

    Molested as a child, Janice believes in the Law. But having seen criminals walk because of a technicality, she questions whether the legal system really works. Her job pits her against her best friend and the very woman who saved her years ago.

    If you like the concept, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    I am an award-winning author who has adapted several of my books for film.

    Regards,

    David Wickenden

    +1 705-698-0708

    wickendendave@gmail.com

  • Monica Arisman

    Member
    October 3, 2023 at 6:48 pm

    If anyone is up for an exchange, my email is marisman@shaw.ca. Thanks.


    Subject: Monica Query Letter Draft ONE

    What I learned doing this assignment is to consider other writer’s advice to make your query letter the best it can be.

    Post your query letter and exchange critiques.

    GENRE: Action/Adventure

    TITLE: TRAFFICK/STOP

    Dear Producer:

    The Next Taken!

    Victoria, a lone wolf cop with a bad-ass attitude, must work within an undercover team to bring down a human trafficking ring. The main trafficker, Jack is a cocaine addicted, sexual deviant, who just happens to be the last man seen with her sister Lizzie.

    Until Victoria showed up, Jack and his human traffickers were able to fly under police radar because of their inside man. But the mole’s gone dark. Jack’s new venture is raided by police. And, undercover Victoria is arrested.

    As tension escalates between Jack and Victoria, Jack blames her for things going from bad to worse and plots his revenge.

    Can Victoria survive Jack’s plan for her? Or, will Lizzie’s betrayal that she was a willing human trafficker destroy Victoria instead?

    If you like the concept of TRAFFICK/STOP, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Regards,

    Monica Arisman.

    Mobile/Text: 403-850-4279

    Email: marisman@shaw.ca

    Bio: Monica has placed well in multiple screenwriting contests.

  • Deb Johnson

    Member
    October 3, 2023 at 10:06 pm

    Deb’s Query Letter Draft ONE

    What I learned… Writing hooks and making them as interesting as possible is the key to a good query letter. I am excited to get some feedback and would appreciate any and all comments. You can email me: ddomm1130@hotmail.com

    Title: The Plastic Bag

    Genre: Drama

    A plastic bag passes from one owner to another and affects each life in a significant way.

    Could a father be merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love?

    Delia doesn’t know what this looks like. Her own father left when she was six years old. She shattered a glass door trying to chase him down – and she’s got scars. Now she’s a snarky teenager, addicted to her phone, and suspended from school for cyberbullying.

    Her rough-and-tumble grandma, Abby, tosses that phone out the car window. They’re on their way to visit Abby’s oldest friend…. the uber-famous, yet grounded artist, Torrie Hartman, who has woven the stories of the Plastic Bag into her new art exhibit. Each piece of art comes alive as she narrates.

    This cursed bag wreaks havoc in every life it touches, and this gets Delia’s attention. Will she allow herself to be drawn into the messy drama? It doesn’t look like it when she sneaks away and almost kills herself trying to buy a new phone.

    Turns out the stories are true and based on both Torrie and Abby’s trials – except the real endings are tragic. Delia is moved. Finally, Torrie reveals how her artwork is theological and paints a picture of God the Father.

    The door to life is open for Delia. Does she have faith to step through?

    Bio: I have a BA in Film from Columbia College, Chicago. I’m also a theological junkie and have logged thousands upon thousands of hours studying the Bible and learning about God the Father.

    If you like the concept, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Contact Info:

    Deborah Johnson…

    • Robert Kerr

      Member
      October 13, 2023 at 6:40 pm

      Deb:

      Been done sick for the last few days. Do you want me to just send you my query letter directly to your email or use the forum?

      Thanks,

      Bob Kerr

      • Deb Johnson

        Member
        October 14, 2023 at 2:02 pm

        Either way is fine! Take your time. Hope you feel better soon!

        • Robert Kerr

          Member
          October 16, 2023 at 3:54 pm

          Deb:

          feel strong enough to be at the keyboard this morning. I am posting my query letter to the forum. I’ll email you to confirm that it is posted.

          Thank you,

          Bob Kerr

  • Terrell Harris

    Member
    October 4, 2023 at 2:53 am

    Terrell’s Query Letter Draft 2

    What I learned doing this assignment is to trust the hooks and don’t be so wordy

    Genre horror, fantasy

    Title: The Darkness

    OPENING HOOK: When two foreigners travel to the Philippines they discover that every monster, every spell, every curse, every backwater belief is 100% real.

    Synopsis: This is a diverse story that intersects different cultures with a single root in spirituality and folklore.

    Western men flock to the Philippines for wives or girlfriends knowing little about the culture and less about the folklore.

    When a local business woman risks everything to build a resort on land cursed by a powerful witch, two foreign guests discover the dark side of Philippine folklore.

    When the resort owner fights back, the witch ups the ante by covering the entire resort in a monster filled inky darkness that ordinary light can’t penetrate. Trapped, the foreigners learn this under belly of Philippines society is all too real and try to take action, but they have no idea what they’re dealing with. Fortunately the resort owner has her own plan, a sandugo or blood pact.

    If you like the concept, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Bio: I’ve spent time in the Philippines interviewing locals about the folklore. I made a gris-gris bag (an African talisman believed capable of warding off evil and bringing good luck) for a friend in the Philippines who claimed she was under attack by witches. She said the counter measure was effective.

    I placed as a quarter finalist in the Los Angeles International Screenplay Diversity Initiative Contest in 2023.

    Contact:

    Terrell Harris

    tharris10zen@icloud.com

    address:

    phone #:

  • LIN FUENTES

    Member
    October 4, 2023 at 6:19 am

    What I learned doing this assignment was there’s always room for improvement.

    Lin’s Query Letter Draft ONE

    Dear Producer,

    Title: The 26th Apprentice

    Written by Lin Fuentes

    Genre: Bio/drama

    Can one woman break through deep-seated bias and change the hearts and minds of men, or is their prejudice insurmountable?

    Based on the true story about a petite, young woman during the sexist 70s, who confronts gender bias as she fights to join a four year electrical apprenticeship program. Despite excelling in 4 different written exams, Linda’s low oral interview score reveals that it accounted for 50% of her overall evaluation. She takes legal action against the union, leading to a settlement that adds her as the 26th apprentice.

    Navigating a male-dominated world, Linda endures challenges and teasing on her first job in residential work. She attends night classes alongside 25 male apprentices. Six months later, she faces increased animosity and struggles with anxiety at an oil refinery, testing her resolve.

    Linda uncovers new fears and academic challenges in her third year, with the union’s strategic efforts to oust her putting her dreams to the ultimate test.

    If you like the concept of The 26th Apprentice, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Lin Fuentes

    linsyen@yahoo.com

  • Monica Arisman

    Member
    October 4, 2023 at 6:15 pm

    Query Letter Draft 2

    Thank you to Debbie Johnson for her insightful help…here’s #2 with the help of ChatGPT!

    GENRE: Action/Adventure

    TITLE: TRAFFICK/STOP

    Dear Producer:

    In a world where darkness thrives, where evil knows no bounds, the time has come for a new kind of hero.

    First, there was Taken. Then there was The Equalizer. Now, witness the rise of a woman ready to unleash her fury and take on the horrors of human trafficking.

    Victoria, a lone wolf cop with a bad-ass attitude, must work within an undercover team to bring down a human trafficking ring. The main trafficker, Jack is a cocaine addicted, sexual deviant, who just happens to be the last man seen with her narcissistic, selfish, sister Lizzie.

    Until Victoria showed up, Jack and his human traffickers were able to fly under police radar because of their inside man. But the mole’s gone dark. Jack’s new venture is raided by police. And, undercover Victoria is arrested.

    As tension escalates between Jack and Victoria, Jack blames her for things going from bad to worse and plots his revenge.

    Can Victoria survive Jack’s plan for her? Or, will Lizzie’s betrayal that she was a willing human trafficker destroy Victoria instead?

    If you like the concept of TRAFFICK/STOP, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Regards,

    Monica Arisman.

    Mobile/Text: 403-850-4279

    Email: marisman@shaw.ca

    Bio: Monica has placed well in multiple screenwriting contests.

  • Tasha Espinoza

    Member
    October 4, 2023 at 6:58 pm

    Tasha’s Query Letter Draft ONE

    If you would like to exchange feedback with me, my email is tespinozaca@gmail.com. Looking forward to working with you!

    What I learned doing this assignment is: writing from the hooks can really elevate a query letter.

    Title: Dating with Demons

    GENRE: Horror

    Dear Producer,

    An exorcism can really mess up your dating life.

    All Bethany wants is one, decent date, but her demon and her priest won’t allow it.

    Demon 23, despite being exorcised from Bethany, still hangs around acting more like a toxic ex than a supernatural force. And Priest Anders assigns her penance every time she swipes right. Bethany vows to stop all the bad dating, but where to begin.

    Then she stumbles upon an unlikely support group: The Survivors of Bethany.

    Someone has been sending Bethany’s suitors evidence of her demonic entanglement. As she digs deeper, she discovers that Deacon Anders is not only behind the betrayal, but he’s a closet occultist with plans to kill Bethany as the catalyst to possessing his way to the Vatican for the papacy.

    Can Bethany and Demon 23 put aside their differences and stop Deacon Anders before it’s too late? Or even worse, can she deal with Demon 23’s realization that he wants to love her, not possess?

    Did Linda Blair have to deal with any of this dating nonsense after her exorcism?

    If you like the concept of Dating with Demons, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Thank you,

    Tasha Espinoza

    BIO: Tasha is a horror screenwriter who has listened to over 100 hours of eye-witness accounts of paranormal activity including demonic possession.

    CONTACT INFO: My email/my phone #

  • David Wickenden

    Member
    October 4, 2023 at 8:24 pm

    Thanks to both Deborah Johnson and Lin Fuentes for their suggestions

    David

  • David Wickenden

    Member
    October 4, 2023 at 8:33 pm

    What have I learned? It’s always great to get extra eyes on your material.

    Title: Defending Innocence

    Genre: Thriller

    TV Pilot

    Dear Producer

    It’s hard enough to get away with murdering child abusers without having your best friend hunting for you.

    Laura, a driven psychiatrist, has firsthand experienced of the damage left behind by child abusers. Learning to fight from the people she serves; Laura begins a crusade to bring real justice to those who hurt children. But now her best friend and RCMP officer Janice is tasked with hunting her down.

    When the guilty have more rights than the innocent, what options are left?

    Molested as a child, Janice believes in the Law. But having seen criminals walk because of a technicality, she questions which method really works. And when she comes face to face with a killer, will she be able to decide?

    If you like the concept, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    I am an award-winning author who has adapted several of my books for film.

    Regards,

    David Wickenden

    +1 705-698-0708

    wickendendave@gmail.com

  • Pamela Price

    Member
    October 5, 2023 at 4:46 pm

    Pam Price Query Letter Draft Two

    Dear Producer,

    Whatever happened to the infamous generation who declared, “Never trust anyone over thirty”? Hint: Same generation who invented the perfect date–“Popcorn and a Movie”.

    Tagline: “Saturday Night Fever”–several decades later.

    Title: “Baby Boomers Can Dance”.

    Genre: Musical/Comedy with Partial Post-Modern Animation. Twelve Original Songs. Ultimate “Popcorn” movie.

    Logline: When teased by her glamourous frenemies for having a dull life, a shy plain Baby Boomer sets out to prove she isn’t ‘boring’.

    Comps: “Barbie”, “Saturday Night Fever”, “Dirty Dancing”, “Rocky Horror Picture Show”

    Emotional Hook: Nostalgia

    BIO for Pam Price (Screenwriter, Animator, Composer). Many Film Festival Awards and accolades for screenplays, songs, and Post-Modern Animation-Style Music Videos.

    -IMDb Profile at “Pamela Price (V), Writer; Animation Department; Composer”.

    -GOOGLE: “Pam Price Baby Boomers Can Dance”

    -YouTube Channel: “pampricewriteranimatorsongs”

    -LinkedIn: “Pam Price; Screenwriter, Songwriter, Animator”

    Thank you for your time to consider this screenplay.

    If you liked the concept, I’d be pleased to send you the script. I can be contacted in the following ways: email: pampricedance@gmail.com, Telephone:

    Happy Dancing!

    Pam Price

  • Ken Turocy

    Member
    October 5, 2023 at 10:38 pm

    If anyone is interested in further discussing, Ken is at kturocy@yahoo.com

    Dear Producer,

    Title: Enola

    Genre: Dark Comedy, sports

    My sports comedy includes gambling, drugs, and murder, and if I asked you, which sport would you guess? Probably not golf, and most likely not the LPGA. Enola is a rock-star, golf-phenom, who against all odds, crashes the ranks of professional golf.

    Enola is a Serial Killer Sports Comedy, and not in that order.

    We all know about the superstitious pre-game rituals that many athletes have, their specialized diets, and the hard work, super- dedication to their sport. Can I ask you one more question, if you wanted something so much, would you do anything to get it?

    Most athletes never achieve the Pro-level, once there earning a win professionally is a lifetime memory, and only a select few achieve greatness.

    Enola reluctantly makes a deal with the devil, her brother, in his sobriety as he takes over as her caddy. She discovers then develops an unusual winning habit, and she continues her journey while trying to confess to her strangely tone-deaf supporters.

    Would you be willing to read my script? If so, I’ll send that your way. I’ve had two of my screenplays optioned, and I’m eager to work and collaborate to make Enola a hit.

    All the best,

    Ken Turocy

  • Ken Turocy

    Member
    October 5, 2023 at 10:44 pm

    I’m at kturocy@yahoo.com if you’d like to talk about my Query #2

    Dear Producer,

    My script Enola is a Serial Killer Sports Comedy, but not in that order.

    Enola is a young female golf-phenom who, with her working class roots, single-parent upbringing, and against all odds crashes the highly competitive ranks of the LPGA.

    Enola will do anything to win, coming in second place is not an option. She makes a deal with the devil, her brother in his sobriety taking over as her caddy.

    Enola will do anything to win, and executing a kill equals an LPGA win.

    Can killing be justified, and can killing be funny? Yes and Yes, but…am I really laughing at this, and can I root for her? Yes and Yes again. It’s all part of the fun, Enola is an accidental killer after a fight with her addict brother’s drug dealer. And, she is an apologetic killer trying to confess to her tone-deaf supporters.

    Would you be willing to read my script? If so, I’ll send that your way. I’ve had two of my screenplays optioned, and I’m eager to work and collaborate to make Enola a hit.

    All the best,

    Ken Turocy

  • LIN FUENTES

    Member
    October 6, 2023 at 7:47 am

    Much thanks to Tasha Espinosa for her invaluable input.

    Lin’s Query Letter Draft TWO

    Dear Producer,

    Title: The 26th Apprentice

    Written by Lin Fuentes

    Genre: Bio/drama

    Sparkies were all men in the sexist 70s, but that didn’t stop a naive, petite, 21 year old woman.

    Based on a true story, Linda fights gender discrimination during her rigorous four year electrical apprenticeship program. Facing obstacles from the very start including an unfair entry exam, her determination never wavers. When she’s denied entry into the program, she takes legal action against the union and wins, becoming the 26th apprentice alongside her 25 male classmates.

    With one battle won, the hostility increases as she navigates a male-dominated world. Linda is in a foreign country having never been on a construction site and is seen as a foreigner/interloper in their environment as they point and stare at her which makes her uncomfortably conscience of being the object of their observation. Twice she has to fend off sexual aggression from men who are twice as big and twice as old as she is that had befriended her. Who can she trust?

    As per apprenticeship protocol every six months apprentices are rotated out of their current job site to a new one. With each new job site Linda uncovers new fears and academic challenges along with the union’s strategic efforts to oust her putting her dreams to the ultimate test.

    Can one woman break through deep-seated bias and change the hearts and minds of men, or is their prejudice insurmountable?

    If you like the concept of The 26th Apprentice, I own all the rights and would be delighted to send you the script.

    Lin Fuentes

  • Tasha Espinoza

    Member
    October 6, 2023 at 11:16 pm

    Tasha’s Query Letter Draft TWO

    Thank you to Lin Fuentes and Terrell Harris for their wonderful feedback!

    What I learned doing this assignment: Make sure that all the hooks are working, especially for the opener and the characters. Use specific terms to provide clarity and try not to pose too many questions within the body of your query letter. And if you have a chance to use Linda Blair, put her up front.

    Title: Dating with Demons

    Genre: Horror Comedy

    Dear Producer,

    Did Linda Blair have to deal with any dating nonsense after her exorcism?

    All Bethany wants is one, decent date, but her demon and her priest won’t allow it.

    Demon 23, despite being exorcised from Bethany, still hangs around acting more like a toxic ex than a supernatural force. And Priest Anders assigns her penance every time she swipes right. Bethany vows to stop all the bad dating, but can’t figure out where to begin.

    Then she stumbles upon an unlikely support group: The Survivors of Bethany.

    Someone has been sending Bethany’s suitors evidence of her demonic entanglement. As she digs deeper, she discovers that Priest Anders is not only behind the betrayal, but he’s a closet conjurer with plans to kill Bethany as the catalyst to possessing his way to the Vatican for the papacy.

    Can Bethany and Demon 23 put aside their differences and stop Deacon Anders before it’s too late? Or even worse, can she deal with Demon 23’s realization that he wants to love her, not possess her?

    If you like the concept of Dating with Demons, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Thank you,

    Tasha Espinoza

    BIO: Tasha is a horror screenwriter who has listened to over 100 hours of eye-witness accounts of paranormal activity including demonic possession.

    CONTACT INFO: My email/my phone #

  • Robert Kerr

    Member
    October 16, 2023 at 4:11 pm

    Bob Kerr’s Query Letter Draft One

    What I learned in this assignment is the value of being concise and strengthening how I present the hooks of my story. I’m looking forward to getting feedback and improving with Draft #2.

    Title: With All Their Might

    Genre: True Story Drama

    A single mother, Fran, must overcome an abusive marriage and rely on an authoritarian father to rescue her from destitution.

    Fran gains probationary admission to Wichita State and continually fails to satisfy her fathers expectations.

    A chance meeting with a reigning World Champion rower begins a journey of discovery that is not anticipated.

    Relentlessly recruited to join the first ever women’s rowing crew, Fran does not know what to do. Turning to her father to once again rescue her, her father surprises her. He encourags her to go out for rowing despite her fear of drowning.

    Reluctantly she goes out for rowing and meets a sisterhood of likeminded women who are focused on surviving the physical challenge and ultimately winning.

    The resulting bonding gives Fran the confidence to defy her father’s expectations of her future and she makes her first independent decision about college.

    Now the women’s crew must keep a secret from their coach that threatens to destroy the women’s crew and sink the entire inaugural crew. Can they keep the secret and still be champions?

    My credentials: I was a quarterfinalist at the Spring 2023 LA International Scriptwriting contest. I was also the co-captain of the first ever rowing crew at Wichita State University.

    If You like this concept, I would be happy to send you my script for your review.

    Sincerely,

    Bob Kerr

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by  Robert Kerr.
  • Sheila Rinear

    Member
    October 16, 2023 at 5:55 pm

    WHAT I LEARNED: I learned to be relentless in cutting my synopsis.

    Sheila Rinear – Query Letter – Draft One

    Genre: Historic Drama

    Title: Sons of Treason

    Dear Producer,

    The next Braveheart!

    The newly-installed English King Edward condemns the traitor who not only murdered his father but also robbed England of its treasury. At the execution when the new King’s mother, Queen Isabella, tells him, “Don’t think this will end well for you!” he realizes that she was in love with the man he just executed.

    The hits just keep coming as Edward’s advisers break it to him that his mother’s got a bastard son by the traitor. Robert, the bastard son, is hidden somewhere in France waiting to take Edward’s throne from him. Edward decides to invade France!

    Edward proves himself to be the gifted military strategist history proclaims. But Edward succumbs to his one great weakness when his warrior mother surrounds him and outnumbers his troops: nightmares.

    An unknown Dream Interpreter traveling through Edward’s camp administering healings to traumatized, war-torn soldiers is brought in for Edward’s cure. This Dream Interpreter full of wit, charisma and wisdom, is Robert, Edward’s crown-seeking bastard brother.

    When Edward discovers Robert’s true identity, what follows? A series of battles, betrayals, surprise loyalties, heroic deeds, romance, and political intrigues that foment a war which spanned One Hundred Years.

    If you like the concept of Sons of Treason, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Best regards,

    Sheila Rinear

    Mobile/Text: 210-488-4828

    Email: srinear53@gmail.com

    Bio: Screenwriter who’s twice been a Finalist in ScreenCraft. Playwright who’s been many-times produced and won awards.

  • Robert Kerr

    Member
    October 17, 2023 at 3:45 pm

    Bob Kerr’s Query Letter Draft # 2

    What I learned in this class is the value of leading with a question when writing a query letter.

    Title: With All Their Might

    Genre: True story drama

    Can joining the first ever women’s rowing crew transform a meek single mother into a leader and a champion?

    Fran is a single mother fleeing an abusive marriage and retreats to her authoritarian father to save her.

    Gaining probationary admission to Wichita State Fran continually fails to meet her father’s expectations.

    A chance meeting with the World Champion rower, who is coaching the inaugural rowing crew, starts Fran on a path that changes her life forever.

    Relentlessly recruited by the coach, Fran’s father encourages her to go out for rowing while ignoring her fear of drowning.

    Reluctantly Fran goes out for rowing. She meets a sisterhood of women who endure the physical demands of the sport and are dedicated to winning.

    Then, they must keep a secret from their coach that threatens to dismantle the women’s crew and sink the entire rowing program.


    My credentials: I was one of the co-captains of this inaugural rowing program at Wichita State. This script was recognized as a quarterfinalist at the 2023 Spring LA International Script Writing competition.


    If you like this concept I will be happy to send you the script for your consideration.


    Sincerely,

    Bob Kerr


  • Robert Kerr

    Member
    October 17, 2023 at 3:48 pm

    I want to thank Deb Johnson for her thoughtful and very helpful review of my Draft One Query Letter. Thank you Deb!

    Bob Kerr

  • Sheila Rinear

    Member
    October 17, 2023 at 4:03 pm

    ASSIGNMENT # 11

    WHAT I LEARNED: I learned that my query letter needs to sound more exciting than a Wikipedia entry.

    .

    Sheila Rinear – Query Letter – Draft Two

    Genre: Historic Drama

    Title: Sons of Treason

    Many thanks to Monica Arisman for her great notes.

    Dear Producer,

    This millennium has seen Gladiator and The Northman. Soon, Sons of Treason!

    Newly-crowned King Edward III executes Roger Mortimer, the traitor who murdered his father and robbed the English treasury. At the traitor’s execution Edward’s mother, Queen Isabella, tells Edward, “Don’t think this will end well for you!” Seems she was in love with Mortimer!

    Not only in love, but rumor has it the Queen has a bastard son somewhere in France and he’s coming for Edward’s crown!

    Edward invades France and proves himself a gifted military strategist. But nightmares, Edward’s one great weakness, halt his victorious campaign when his warrior mother surrounds him and outnumbers his troops.

    An unknown Dream Interpreter traveling through King Edward’s camp administering healings to traumatized, war-torn soldiers seeks to heal Edward. This Dream Interpreter full of wit, charisma and wisdom, is Robert, the King’s crown-seeking bastard brother.

    When Edward discovers Robert’s true identity, what follows? Battles, betrayals, a siege, surprise loyalties, heroic deeds, romance, and political intrigues that foment a war which galloped on for One Hundred Years.

    If you like the concept of Sons of Treason, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    Best regards,

    Sheila Rinear

    Mobile/Text: 210-488-4828

    Email: srinear53@gmail.com

    Bio: As Screenwriter: twice a Finalist in ScreenCraft. As Playwright: award-winning and many-times produced.

  • Dan LoBrace

    Member
    October 20, 2023 at 6:37 am

    Running a little behind! Is anyone still available to swap feedback?? 🙂 You can email me at dan.lobrace08@gmail.com

    Dan LoBrace – Query Letter

    Genre: Horror

    Title: Kaleidoscope

    Dear Producer,

    Kaleidoscopes can be magical, but this one is evil.

    When troubled teenager Kendall finds this mysterious kaleidoscope, her family’s biggest fears start coming true. Kendall is attacked in her home by a strange stalker, and the teen exhibits signs of demonic possession in front of her mother. When these threats get more dangerous, Kendall tries to flee her home, only to learn…

    The kaleidoscope has turned her house into a maze of supernatural horrors.

    After miraculously escaping, Kendall learns there’s a demon imprisoned in the kaleidoscope. It’s been isolating each family member into their own personalized nightmare, and intends to devour her loved ones after they’re fully trapped in its web of phantasms. Kendall decides to return to her house and try to save her family, risking her life once again.

    Will Kendall be able to save her family from the horrifying labyrinth of the kaleidoscope?

    If you like the concept for KALEIDOSCOPE, I’d be happy to send you the script.

    BIO: Dan is an optioned screenwriter specializing in horror. He has placed well in multiple horror contests, which can be found on his Coverfly page.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by  Dan LoBrace.
  • John Woodward

    Member
    October 22, 2023 at 5:04 am

    John Woodward’s Query Letter – Draft One

    Doing this assignment, I learned more about writing a query letter.

    Question 1.

    TO ANYONE WHO READS THIS PLEASE VOTE for the best opening hook to a noir-thriller

    A, B, or C below:

    A. Allison Van Zandt, the abused wife of a notorious broker of black-market art, to her lover: I realized at an early age that under the right circumstances, I was capable of anything.

    B. If the potential payoff were a $20 million masterpiece, would you put your life on the line for an alluring woman who might not be worthy of trust?

    C. The Takedown Artist is a neo-noir thriller about a washed-up cage fighter who risks his life to steal a $20-million masterpiece with a mysterious and seductive woman who might not be worthy of trust.

    QUESTION 2.

    The Takedown Artist: a neo-noir thriller

    Synopsis

    A washed-up cage fighter meets an alluring woman hours before her estranged husband, a notorious broker of black-market art, tries to kill her. Desperate to start a new life, she persuades the fighter to help her steal a cursed El Greco masterpiece from her husband who stole it from a barbaric Russian expatriate in L.A. to shop the hot masterpiece — “trophy art” stolen during World War II.

    Their plan rebounds on them when the husband is killed during the heist. In their struggle to escape the Russian barbarian and the police, they fall in love, but can you trust your lover when the tie that binds is murder? Is the seductress an abused wife desperate to free herself from a controlling husband — or a world-class con artist?

    A mysterious murder, a cursed masterpiece, a gauntlet of MMA battles, and a decadent LA underworld forge a noir canvas where love, greed, trust and betrayal slug it out toe-to-toe.

    3. Write your Bio and add it below the salutation with the word “BIO:” before it.

    BIO: John Woodward has an MA in Film Production from UT Austin. He has written and directed three feature films. Texas Taliban won several festival awards. His short film Disciples of the Crow, based on a Stephen King story, won an Academy Award. His feature screenplay Out of the Dark won the Houston International film Festival.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by  John Woodward.

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