Lesson 11

[Carole Avila]

Carole Avila – Level 2 Horror Emotion Scene

What I learned doing this assignment is how much scarier a scene can be when incorporating the right emotional responses.

Write a scene that uses all three of the horror emotions of fear, suspense, and dread:

INT – ADLEY’S ROOM – NIGHT

ADLEY nudges the freezing handle and pushes on the door. It slowly opens. She switches on the light and takes a few hesitant steps into the room, leaving the door wide-open behind her. She scans the room and shakes her head. ADLEY steps back, turning to the door, but it is closed. The overhead light flickers off and on. ADLEY gasps and spins, facing the room. A hulking shadow in the far corner of the room starts to materialize into a shape. Her eyes widen, and the lights go out.

With ambient moonlight, ADLEY turns around and runs toward the door. With a shaking hand, she grabs the handle, and her fingertips sizzle on the cold surface. She whips her hand back and quickly flicks on light. The shadow is now directly in front of her. At the ‘head’ of the onyx mass, a spidery hand emerges, attached to a string of bones. The clawed limb flies outward and tries grab ADLEY, but she lurches to the side. The skeletal hand and tail smash into the door and the bones clatters into pieces onto the floor.

ADLEY runs to the far corner of the room and is horrified as the broken bones reconnect like a magnet. The hand jumps onto the handle and locks the door.

ADLEY
No!
(covers her mouth)

The spidery hand pounces to the floor and scurries under the bed, but the black mist reappears in front of the door and starts to take shape. ADLEY snatches a picture frame off the dresser and flings it at the shadow. It dissolves. ADLEY sprints for the door.

Out of nowhere, the skeletal hand shoots into the air in front of her, hovering over the door with its fingers spread like a catcher’s mitt. ADLEY slides low on her socks beneath the bones and collides with the door. The spindly hand grabs her foot. She cries out and slams her foot on the floor, crushing the bony hand. It breaks into pieces and scatters across the floor like marbles. ADLEY scrambles to her feet and is frozen when she hears a voice.

CURSE
(in a wicked, whispery voice)
Aaad…

Wicked CACKLING fills the room.

ADLEY
Shut up! Don’t you say my name!

ADLEY grabs hold of the handle and cries out at the freezing burn to her skin. She yanks the door open and looks back. The claw-like hand with sharp nails flies directly at her face. ADLEY pulls the door closed. She hears the clatter of bone against the door. ADLEY hunches over in the hallway, gasping for breath.

[Timothy G Winters]

Time Winters’ Level 2 Horror Emotion Scene
“What I learned doing this assignment is that I don’t have all the answers. And maybe don’t worry about being good and getting the thing submitted in time (though I would still love to.) I must sit and face my story and not give up.

TRUCK INT – AFGHANISTAN CITY – DAY.

Chaz snaps awake. It is bright daylight. He is in the driver’s seat of the old ambulance. He reaches for the door handle and finds his left hand is cuffed to the steering wheel. Chaz pulls and tugs every which way to get his hand free; it’s locked to the wheel!

CHAZ
‘ hell is . . . ?

Staring at his left hand as if it betrayed him, he notices: He’s no longer in the civvies he was wearing before, he’s in

CHAZ
…My desert fatigues?

Chaz grabs the cuff chain and wrenches at it with all his might. Something moves behind him in the back of the truck. . .

CHAZ
Hey, old man, did you. . .?

Chaz turns around. The back is entirely empty except for a wooden crate labeled, ”U.S. MILITARY”. He feels under the seats for—anything.
His breath comes in bursts.
CHAZ
O.K. . . .Okay. Ah, okay. . .

Chaz clumsily opens the car door and slips out.

EXT – AFGHAN STREET – DAY
He looks at the bombed-out city around him. He’s not in Texas anymore. He tries to get his bearings: where in hell is he and how did he get here?
There is no one around. He makes sure and then unzips and relieves himself, single-handedly, on the side of the truck.

AMBROSE (OS)
Hey! Hold it right there, buddy! That’s my damn
Vehicle . . .

Chaz freezes mid-stream and peers behind himself. Stomping towards Chaz is SARGEANT DAVID AMBROSE, 29, a strapping, by-the-book, jar-head haircut in full desert battle gear.

CHAZ
Your truck?

AMBROSE
Button goddamn up!

CHAZ
So you got a key to this? Get this off me!

AMBROSE
You’re cuffed to my vehicle!

CHAZ
Give me the key and I won’t be . . .

Ambrose looks at the cuffs and Chaz attached to them.

AMBROSE
No! No! No! Not now, not today . . .Who ARE you?

SOUNDS OF RIFLE FIRE within a couple blocks. Both men freeze, listening.

AMBROSE
Can you drive? Get in the truck . . .

Chaz climbs back in as Ambrose runs to the passenger side.

INT – TRUCK – DAY
Ambrose shoves the key into the ignition, pulling his sidearm, and aiming it at Chaz’s head. Chaz starts the engine.

AMBROSE
Two blocks, up ahead. There’s an alley on the left—take it . . .

Chaz hits the gas.

CHAZ
I’m driving! You gonna shoot me?

EXT – AFGHAN STREET – DAY.
As the truck cruises out past the building into the open, bullets spray across the street and the truck.

INT – TRUCK – DAY.
The men shield from the blasts as Chaz focuses on getting out of the open. THE BULLETS PINGING THE TRUCK AND THE STREET drown out everything else. Chaz sees the alley and aims for it. Sunlight pours through several holes in the back as the windshield is suddenly webbed with cracks. Both men YELL.

EXT – AFGHAN STREET – DAY.
Chaz pilots the ambulance into the narrow alleyway.

AMBROSE
Pull behind there and stop!

CHAZ
You ’ any idea what you’re doing?

AMBROSE
Nobody does. . .STOP!

The truck slams to a stop.

INT – TRUCK – DAY.
SILENCE. Chaz and Ambrose watch the alleyway, waiting. Ambrose checks his watch and the structure they are now directly behind.

CHAZ
We gotta get outta here! What are you waiting for?

AMBROSE
Shut up! (checking watch again) Dammit. Let’s go.
They’re not coming . . .. . .Supposed to get out
here. They’re . . .

Chaz sees someone cowering in the shadows of the doorway. He immediately slams into gear and manuvers the back of the truck in line with the door.

CHAZ
Get the door! Let’em in . . .

AMBROSE
My orders, asshole!

Ambrose, however, jumps up and opens the back doors of the ambulance. BULLET SOUNDS GETTING CLOSER. Out of the shadows come: JAMES HOWARD (40’s, American) dusty business suit clutching several suitcases, PVT. DANA SIKOWSKI (20’S) Female U.S. GI, ushering SALA RASFARI (30, Afghani) carrying a baby, and RAFI ABDUL, (30’s, Afghani) turbaned and distrustful.

They plow into the truck. As Ambrose starts to shut the back, Chaz drives as fast as he can from the alley. As the group settle in and hold on, Ambrose makes his way up to the shotgun seat. As he sits . . .

AMBROSE
(appreciative) You’ve done this before. There’s
one more stop . . .

Chaz scowls.

CUT TO:

[Adam Wright]

What I learned doing this assignment is this is the most fun part of the movie for me. I like trying to ratchet up these emotions. My scene needs work but it feels like these emotions will definitely make this section better.

INT – KITCHEN – NIGHT

DYLAN
Action!

AMANDA walks toward the cupboard and a bear trap, hidden under dust and debris snaps into her leg. AMANDA screams. Blood gushes. If this is acting, AMANDA is knocking it out of the park. She falls to the floor. DYLAN follows with the camera.

DYLAN
Use that! Use the pain.

AMANDA
Stop rolling and get me the fuck out of here you asshole!

ALESSANDRA walks in. She’s horrified to see the carnage. She turns to leave but before she does, she sees DYLAN grab a knife from the kitchen knife block.

DYLAN
Show me more. I need to see the pain. The true pain, deep down. Show it to me and I’ll let you out.

AMANDA, already crying, whispers.

AMANDA
Please.

DYLAN
Close. So close. I just need a little more.

DYLAN slices into Amanda’s wounded leg with the knife. AMANDA screams.

DYLAN
That’s it! Keep that going.

ALESSANDRA sneaks away before DYLAN sees her.

INT – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

RAVI, CHUCK and CARRIE are gathered on the couch. ALESSANDRA rushes in.

ALESSANDRA
He’s lost it. He’s going to murder Amanda. We have to get out of here.

RAVI laughs. CHUCK gets up and heads for the nearest door. The door closes with a loud bang. A lock clicking into place sounds. CHUCK grabs the door.

CHUCK
Ow, fuck, the handle’s hot.

The screams from the kitchen stop. From the other side of the door there is a loud thump.

Beat

Another loud thump.

Beat

The door unlocks

[Susannah Farrow]

Susannah’s Level 2 Horror Emotion Scene

3. Answer the question “What I learned doing this assignment is…?” and put it at the top of your work.
What I learned doing this assignment is the same as what I learned last lesson as this is further work on the same idea.

2. Brainstorm the scene to emphasize the Level 2 emotions and write it.

EXT. SWAMP / OUTSIDE – DAY
The search party runs into a nearby store and watches through the window as the killer cuts throats and stabs hearts left and right.

INT. GENERAL STORE – DAY

HORACE
What the hell is going on?

ELIJAH
This is something different.

WAYLON
What are you talking about, old man? There’s a psycho out there killing everyone.

HORACE
What do we? What do we do?

BONNIE
Calm down. We need to calm down and think about this.

ZOE
He’s gone.

MAGNOLIA
What?

ZOE
He’s gone. Look, he’s not there anymore.

Outside there is a pile of bodies but the killer has disappeared.

MAGNOLIA
We should go.

WAYLON
Wait. Don’t go out there He could be anywhere.
The search party look around and a moment of uneasy silence passes.
A sudden knock on the door makes them all jump.

TOWNSPERSON
Please, let me in.
Waylon reaches for the handle.

MAGNOLIA
No, don’t. It might be him.

BONNIE
You can’t leave him out there. Let him in.
Waylon glances at each member of the search party and eventually opens the door, letting the townsperson inside.

[j y]

Jessica Tremblay’s Level 2 Horror Emotion Scene
What I learned doing this assignment is I love outlining. But when I go to script, I feel uncertain about my voice and my writing, but it’s a first draft so I shouldn’t worry about the writing at this stage.

Fear: the monster is hungry and chasing her. It will eat her if she doesn’t feed it something!
Suspense: she places the picnic basket in the hallway. The baby mice are inside, acting as bait. She waits for the beast to appear and eat the mice.
Dread: Monster comes closer. Momma mouse looks at Joanna. She decides to save the mice. Flees in a locker. But monster breaks in, eats the mice anyway (and momma mouse), then goes after Joanna.
 
HALLWAY
with her red hoodie, her picnic basket, the christmas tree in the background, she looks like red riding hood in the forest.
She sets picnic basket in the middle of the hallway. Opens it. Turns her back to it and leaves.
Inside the basket — BABY MICE. Pink. Blind. Helpless. Perfect bait.
She returns to
LOCKER
She aims her weapon at the hallway over the basket. And waits.
Momma Mouse slips under the door. Stares at Joanna.
JOANNA
Shoo. Shoo.
The mouse doesn't budge.
Joanna wipes sweat off her forehead.
The mouse looks at her.
Joanna tries to focus on the hallway, but she’s distracted.
She looks at the basket, then the mouse.
She blows a strand of hair from her face.
The shadow of the beast is visible at the corner.
She grabs the weapon tighter.
The mouse SQUEAKS.
Sweat DRIPS down her temple.
The basket sits in the hallway with helpless baby mice in it.
Joanna bites her lips. She can’t do this.
JOANNA
Fuck!
She dives. Grabs the basket as the shadow of the beast appears on the wall. She runs back to
LOCKER.
Sets down the basket near Momma Mouse.
JOANNA
I’m sorry.
The mouse SQUEAKS.
JOANNA
Don't worry.
They're safe.
She opens the basket to show the mouse.
Suddennly a TONGUE lashes between the planks. Momma Mouse gets eaten.
Joanna SCREAMS. The beast lunges. Rams the door.
She climbs up the wall.
Beast bursts in. Shoves its face in the picnic basket. Eats the baby mice. Then goes after Joanna.  

• This reply was modified 1 year ago by  j y.