Lesson 13

[Jeanne Sanner]

What I learned from doing this assignment: I learned how important it is to show the main character’s reaction to what happened to her. What I don’t know if it is dramatic enough, or if it is too long. The point could be made with no dialogue, but right now I think it is important to also lay the ground work for the next step in her journey, which this scene does. Onward and upward.

FADE IN: ACT 2

INT. ANDREA’S LIVING ROOM – CONTINUOUS

Laura up late watching TV, Andrea enters. Laura turns TV off.

LAURA

What happened?

ANDREA

I told the truth.

Andrea joins Laura on couch. Laura puts her arms around her.

LAURA

That bad?

ANDREA

Done. No hope.

LAURA

I’m truly sorry, Andi. Is there anything I can do?

ANDREA

Tuck me in.

INT. ANDREA’S KITCHEN – LATE FRIDAY MORNING

Laura, in PJs, eating grits. Andrea enters in PJs. Eyes swollen. In a stupor wanting/not wanting to fix breakfast.

LAURA

Sit down. I’ll fix yours. We’re outta eggs, will cereal be okay?

ANDREA

(Sitting)

I don’t care.

LAURA

Cheerios or Wheat Chex.

ANDREA

(Big Sigh)

I don’t care.

LAURA

Cheerios it is. Banana?

ANDREA

Nods, yes.

After a pause, while getting Andrea’s cereal ready.

LAURA

If you don’t want to talk, I understand.

ANDREA

There’s nothing to say.

LAURA

(Pause)

Well,… I have a question.

ANDREA

What?

LAURA

Do you think you’ll ever want to fix things with your father?

ANDREA

No.

LAURA

Because I was thinking, maybe we should talk to that guy Darin met in the park. He really helped Darin a lot.

ANDREA

Did he? Darin doesn’t seem too happy now.

LAURA

Yea, but that’s different. Anyway, I was thinking of seeing him to help me get over my anger with mom.

ANDREA

You go right ahead.

Laura serves cereal. Puts sugar on it for Andrea.

LAURA

I still can’t believe she cremated dad without even consulting me. Do you want juice?

Andrea shakes her head no.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 1 month ago by  Jeanne Sanner. Reason: I did the unforgivable; I re wrote with screenplay in mind instead of stage which I have lived in as an actor, director, coach for many years

[Jeanne Sanner]

<div>What I learned from this lesson: After walking away from my first attempt of an opening for the second act, I realized (since I have had only stage experience as an actor, director, and coach) that I tend to be writing a play. Way too much dialogue. I don’t know if I have gone too far the other way, but I cut the dialogue quite a bit. I like this result a lot better, but when I read it tomorrow, I may feel differently about it. I know I’m just go with what I create, but I have not been able to do that. I’m not experienced enough yet at speedwriting to be at peace with it. I have not given up; I’m just being honest with myself. </div>

FADE IN: ACT 2 SCENE 1
INT. ANDREAS KITCHEN – MID AFTERNOON
Laura, in PJs, eating a sandwich, Andrea enters, in PJs. Eyes
swollen. In a stupor, wanting/not wanting to fix something.
Laura gets up signals Andrea to sit. Laura fixes Andrea her
favorite sandwich. Sits at the table to finish her lunch and
keep Andrea company. They do not talk.

INT. LAURA’S CAR OUTSIDE HER MOTHER’S HOUSE – LATE AFTERNOON
The engine is off. Laura is trying to decide to go in to her
mother’s house. She opens the car door. Gets one leg out and
stops. Pulls leg back in. Sits with door open. Her lips are
moving, she is talking to herself. Her head shakes for no and
nods for yes. She gets one leg out again. Then suddenly pulls
her leg in, closes the door, starts the car, and drives off.

INT. ANDREA’S MOTHER’S HOME – CONTINUOUS
Andrea’s mother has been watching without being seen. She is
closing her eyes as if in prayer and opening them again. She
is devastated when Laura drives off. She looks at the picture
of her and Laura and starts to cry.

INT. ANDREA’S LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Andrea is playing a game on her phone. Laura is playing
Sudoku in a puzzle magazine.

LAURA
I was thinking of going to the park
on Monday and talking with the guy
who helped Darin.

Andrea is quiet; does not look up.

LAURA (CONT’D)
I want to stop being angry with my
mom for cremating Dad.

Andrea is quiet; does not look up.

LAURA (CON’T) I was wondering if you would go
with me.

ANDREA
(Does not look up)

LAURA
The truth is…

ANDREA
(Looking straight at
Laura)
Don’t mention truth to me, ever.Ok?
I mean it! (Returns to phone)

LAURA
Okay. Okay.(pause) Actually,
(mouths “the truth is” at Andrea
knowing she won’t see her)I don’t
want to go alone.

ANDREA
Ask Darin to go.

LAURA
I did. He’s swamped with new
contracts.

Silence.

INT. ANDREA’S BEDROOM – SUNDAY EARLY AFTERNOON

Andrea is still in bed, not asleep, turned away from door.
Laura enters with laundry bag, goes to Andrea’s closet, picks
up Andrea’s laundry bag, turns to leave, puts laundry bags
down at the door, sits on the edge of the bed.

LAURA
I’m going to do laundry and then go
for a walk in the park; I would
really love to have your company.
(catches herself, laughs) Not for
the laundry, but for the park.

Andrea rolls over and looks at Laura. Thinks.

ANDREA
Okay.

LAURA
Okay? Okay? Okay! I’ll be back in
about an hour.

INT. ANDREAS KITCHEN – MONDAY MORNING
Girls are in the kitchen, cleaning up after breakfast. Laura
genuinely wants company. She is not trying to manipulate
Andrea. She actually prefers Darin be there, but he can’t.

LAURA
I really would like you to go with
me to see Odd Character; I’m just
not comfortable going alone. You
don’t have to say or do…

ANDREA
Okay.
Laura absorbs what Andrea said, gives Andrea a gentle hug.

EXT. PARK – LATE MORNING

[Jeanne Sanner]

FADE IN: ACT 2 SCENE 1

INT. ANDREA’S LIVING ROOM – CONTINUOUS

Laura up late watching TV, Andrea enters. Laura turns TV off.

LAURA

What happened?

ANDREA

I told the truth.

Andrea joins Laura on couch. Laura puts her arms around her.

LAURA

That bad?

ANDREA

Done. No hope.

LAURA

I’m truly sorry, Andi. Is there anything I can do?

ANDREA

Tuck me in.

INT. ANDREAS KITCHEN – MID AFTERNOON

Laura, in PJs, eating a sandwich, Andrea enters, in PJs. Eyes swollen. In a stupor, wanting/not wanting to fix something. Laura gets up signals Andrea to sit. Laura fixes Andrea her favorite sandwich. Sits at the table to finish her lunch and keep Andrea company. They do not talk.

INT. LAURA’S CAR OUTSIDE HER MOTHER’S HOUSE – LATE AFTERNOON

The engine is off. Laura is trying to decide to go in to her mother’s house. She opens the car door. Gets one leg out and stops. Pulls leg back in. Sits with door open. Her lips are moving, she is talking to herself. Her head shakes for no and nods for yes. She gets one leg out again. Then suddenly pulls her leg in, closes the door, starts the car, and drives off.

INT. ANDREA’S MOTHER’S HOME – CONTINUOUS

Andrea’s mother has been watching without being seen. She is closing her eyes as if in prayer and opening them again. She is devastated when Laura drives off. She looks at the picture of her and Laura and starts to cry.

INT. ANDREA’S LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

Andrea is playing a game on her phone. Laura is playing Sudoku in a puzzle magazine.

LAURA

I was thinking of going to the park on Monday and talking with the guy who helped Darin.

Andrea is quiet; does not look up.

LAURA

I want to stop being angry with my mom for cremating Dad.

Andrea is quiet; does not look up.

I was wondering if you would go with me.

ANDREA

(Does not look up)

No.

LAURA

The truth is

ANDREA

(Looking straight at Laura)

Don’t mention truth to me, ever.Ok? I mean it! (Returns to phone)

LAURA

Okay. Okay.(pause) Actually, (mouths “the truth is” at Andrea knowing she won’t see her)I don’t want to go alone.

ANDREA

Ask Darin to go.

LAURA

I did. He’s swamped with new contracts.

Silence.

INT. ANDREA’S BEDROOM – SUNDAY EARLY AFTERNOON

Andrea is still in bed, not asleep, turned away from door. Laura enters with laundry bag, goes to Andrea’s closet, picks up Andrea’s laundry bag, turns to leave, puts laundry bags down at the door, sits on the edge of the bed.

LAURA

I’m going to do laundry and then go for a walk in the park; I would really love to have your company. (catches herself, laughs) Not for the laundry, but for the park.

Andrea rolls over and looks at Laura. Thinks.

ANDREA

Okay.

LAURA

Okay? Okay? Okay! I’ll be back in about an hour.

INT. ANDREAS KITCHEN – MONDAY MORNING

Girls are in the kitchen, cleaning up after breakfast. Laura genuinely wants company. She is not trying to manipulate Andrea. She actually prefers Darin be there, but he can’t.

LAURA

I really would like you to go with me to see Odd Character; I’m just not comfortable going alone. You don’t have to say or do…

ANDREA

Okay.

Laura absorbs what Andrea said, gives Andrea a gentle hug.

EXT. PARK – LATE MORNING

[Laurie Reilly]

Laurie- Act 2, Key Scene 1.- Reaction. What I learned is that even short beginning, middle, end outlines really helps me move through the scene quicker.

INT. WOODVILLE 1992, JOE AND ANNIE CABIN, DINING ROOM-EVENING

Under the dinner table, Annie-35’s foot is resting on Joe-35’s foot, her toe brushing his ankle. Annie-35 is relishing a normal dinner, her eyes scanning around, noticing every little thing. She runs her thumb over her wedding ring on her left hand-Joe’s ring. Her other hand wears no ring.

ERIN-10

…And then- Sara accidentally called the teacher Mommy!

Hunter-8 starts to laugh, but Joe-35 gives him a conspiratorial slight shake of the head.

ERIN-10

Everyone laughed. But I didn’t. Sara’s my best friend.

JOE-35

You have a loyal heart. That’s one of the many things I love about you punky-pie.

ERIN-10

Daaddd. I’m getting too old for punky-pie.

JOE-35

Nope, never too old. I’m going to yell it out at your high school graduation. ‘That’s my punky pie’!!

HUNTER-8

I’m definitely going to laugh at that.

Erin-10 pretends to punch him. Annie-35 takes a bite.

ANNIE-35

Oh my god, I haven’t made this in so long. I don’t remember it tasting this good.

JOE-35

Your chicken pot pie is always good honey. And we just had it a few weeks ago when the Burns boys came to dinner.

HUNTER-8

Hey! What about me? How come I don’t have a nick name?

Annie-35 and Joe-35 laugh and exchange a glance.

ANNIE-35

Well, you used to. Your dad gave it to you, but I made him stop calling you that when you were three.

HUNTER-8

What? What was it?

JOE-35

Turtle-Butt!

Erin laughs.

ERIN-10

I remember that! There was more. Mr. Stinky Turtle-Butt the fourth!

Erin starts purposefully laughing, extra hard.

HUNTER-8

Hey!

ANNIE-35

Erin, I thought laughing at your friends wasn’t nice.

HUNTER-8

Yeah. I guess I’m not your friend.

Erin stops and reaches over to hug Hunter, who is sulking.

ERIN-10

I’m sorry.

Hunter stops pouting, he was faking it.

HUNTER-8

I forgive you Punky-Pie.

Erin fake punches him and they’re off and running again. Annie-35 takes another bite of her dinner.

ANNIE-35

Oh wow. It’s like my taste buds woke up or something.

JOE-35

(quietly)

That’s not the only thing that’s waking up.

Under the table, Annie’s foot is now in Joe’s lap, teasing him.

INT. WOODVILLE 1992- ANNIE AND JOE’S BATHROOM

Annie is getting ready for bed, wearing a casual short nighty and looking at herself in the mirror with wonder. She feels her arms, her legs. She talks quietly to herself.

ANNIE-35

Wow, I was in good shape. Why was I always so worried?

She peaks down her top.

ANNIE-35

Not bad for nursing three kids.

(pause)

Two kids.

Now Annie is troubled. She stares at her eyes in the mirror, as if looking for a trace of Annie-60.

JOE-35 (O.S.)

Hey, you coming to bed?

Annie looks towards the bedroom, then back in the mirror.

ANNIE-35

Please Sarita, please, if it’s up to you, please let me stay a little longer.

INT. WOODVILLE 1992, JOE AND ANNIE BEDROOM-NIGHT

Annie-35 and Joe-35 have just finished what is obviously an intense love making session. She snuggles in to him, wrapping both her arms and legs around him tightly, as if to keep him there always.

JOE-35

Hmmmm. That was-

ANNIE-35

If you say ‘nice’ I’m going to bite you.

JOE-35

I was going to say spectacular, but a bite might be interesting. Where?

She leans over and kisses him, then takes his lip gently in her teeth, then releases it and kisses him deeper.

JOE-35

Well now. I am at a loss for words.

ANNIE-35

I love you so much Joe. You know that right?

JOE-35

Well yah. I kind of figured that when you married me, just a humble carpenter.

ANNIE-35

And ski patrolman. I just wondered if I said it enough. Say it enough.

JOE-35

Uh oh. I get the hint. I love you, I love you, I love you. I. Love. You.

Annie snuggles closer, if possible, her eyes wide.

JOE-35

Uh, honey? Um, the snuggling is great, but can you just give me a tad bit of space? I’m kind of sweaty.

Annie smiles and reluctantly moves just an inch away.

INT. WOODVILLE 1992, JOE AND ANNIE CABIN, KIDS ROOM-MIDNIGHT

Annie-35 is watching Erin sleep from her doorway, then quietly closes the door and lets herself silently in to Hunter’s room. She looks around at the detritus of an eight year old spread throughout the room, then sits gingerly on the edge of his bed.

Without thinking, she starts humming a line from Taylor Swifts ‘Just stay little’, song saying the last few words in a whisper. Suddenly she realizes and gasps, putting her hands over her mouth for a moment. She whispers to herself.

ANNIE-35

Taylor Swift is like three years old right now.

Annie-35 starts to panic a little. She squeeze’s her own arm.

ANNIE-35

This feels real.

She touches an book strewn on the bed.

ANNIE-35

This feels real.

She gently touches Hunter’s shoulder.

ANNIE-35

Hunter is real.

Hunter stirs and turns over, so Annie quickly gets up and leaves the room.

INT. WOODVILLE 1992, JOE AND ANNIE CABIN, LR-MIDNIGHT, CONT.

Annie is trying not to panic as she paces around the dark living room. She pauses and touches various pictures and mementos reverently: Wedding pictures, a vase, kid school pictures. She is murmuring to herself.

ANNIE-35

This feels so real, so real. What the fuck.

She spies a picture of her mother Mary when she was in her mid-thirties, very beautiful. Annie-35 stares into the picture.

ANNIE-35

Was Sean and Maggie that whole life just, just a really long dream? Or am I dreaming now? Is this how it started for you?

Annie puts the picture down and hurries back down the hall to her bedroom. She’s relieved Joe is still there and slips back into bed, cuddling up to him. She whispers to herself

ANNIE-35

Stay awake, stay awake, stay awake. I want to stay here just awhile longer. Stay awake.

[Margaret]

Margaret’s Act 2 Reaction to TP 1

What I learned doing this assignment: I enjoy this first draft writing! Nice to be freed from wordsmithing!

EXT. TOWN – SIDEWALK – DAY

Jabe chooses to go to the Hedeon Sector

BEGINNING: Jabe contemplates his choices, watching the ocean.

MIDDLE: Jabe stands at the crossroads.

END: Jabe heads to the Hedeon sector.

EXT. ROCKY BLUFF – DAY

Jabe contemplates the ocean from the rocky ledge, aura blue.

EXT. TOWN SIDEWALK – DAY

Jabe stands at the crossroads, stares at a sign pointing both to the Dorek and Hedeon sectors.

He watches as Dorek turn and take the road to the Dorek sector and Hedeon turn to the Hedeon sector.

Jabe turns towards the Dorek sector.

After a few feet, his aura turns red as he makes an abrupt turnaround, crosses the road, heads for the Hedeon sector.

EXT. HEDEON SECTOR – DAY

Jabe leaves the Dorek to meet with the Hedeon. Since he is of purple aura himself, he is accepted and arranges to meet with Armann. In the background, Akuji, the man who Jabe stopped from killing the Dorek smolders with hate, a deep red aura.

BEGINNING: Jabe meets up with the Kind Hedeon

MIDDLE: Jabe is forced to see Armann

END: Akuji watches Jabe with hateful eyes

EXT. HEDEON SECTOR – DAY

Rows of houses line the Hedeon sector. HEDEON are outside, washing cars, mowing lawns. All sport a purple aura.

Jabe stops at the first house just as the Kind Hedeon steps out, sees Jabe.

KIND HEDEON

Ah! Took my advice, I see. Welcome.

Jabe waves a greeting and the Kind Hedeon approaches.

KIND HEDEON

You’ll be needing a place to stay.

Jabe’s relief is evident.

JABE

Yeah, and a job too, I guess. Do you know…

KIND HEDEON

…No worries, son. Come with me.

The Kind Hedeon moves down the sidewalk. Jabe hesitates, moves to catch up.

A NOSY NEIGHBOR calls out to the Kind Hedeon.

NOSY NEIGHBOR

Heh! Where are you off to? Who is that with you?

Jabe smiles, waves at the Nosy Neighbor.

JABE

Name’s Jabe. Hello!

KIND HEDEON

I’m taking him to Armann.

Jabe stops cold, turns yellow.

JABE

Wait, what? I thought we were going to some kind of community housing or something!

KIND HEDEON

You will need to see Armann.

The Kind Hedeon takes a few steps forward, Jabe doesn’t move.

Both the Kind Hedeon and the Nosy Neighbor move up to Jabe.

KIND HEDEON

You will go to Armann, son. All Hedeon obey his directives.

Jabe backs up.

JABE

Maybe this was a mistake.

NOSY NEIGHBOR

All purple belong here. Like he said, you will go.

The Nosy Neighbor whistles, attracting the attention of others on the street. He motions for them to join him.

The Hedeon on the street leave their tasks, move towards Jabe.

KIND HEDEON

No need for force, right Jabe?

Jabe puts his hands up in surrender.

JABE

No, no.

Jabe attempts to lighten the moment, singing a ditty.

JABE

Should I stay or should I go?

The Kind Hedeon ignores his attempt at humor, motions for Jabe to follow him.

KIND HEDEON

Don’t be afraid, Jabe. With your size, I’m sure Armann will keep you close, take good care of you.

Jabe turns blue.

JABE

Stay with Armann? I’m not sure, I mean…

KIND HEDEON

…as long as you are Hedeon and are not involved with the Dorek, you will have no problems. Come, it’s a short distance.

A purple Jabe follows the Kind Hedeon down the street.

Three houses down, Akuji watches from the shadows as Jabe and the Kind Hedeon pass. His aura changes to a deep red.