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Lesson 14
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19 Replies
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Megan’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is… that I seem to be getting better at looking at scenes for their beginning, middle, and end. I find myself more able to move, combine, and redistribute scenes, fluidly using the beat sheet. I am enjoying the feeling of competency.
I feel like I was able to accomplish Key Scene 2: Protagonist takes on a plan and executes it. I’m not sure about Key Scene 3: Not only does their plan fail, but . . . While I did have the plan fail, I am still looking for a way to amp up the stakes for the “but.”
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM — DAY
Anna walks into the museum carrying the two coffees. Kara makes a beeline for the coffee.
KARA
Thank you! You are a lifesaver!
ANNA
Not a problem.
Kara glances at Anna as she sips her coffee.
KARA
What’s wrong with your face?
ANNA
I’m talking to Jenny today about the open research position.
KARA
You want to move into research?
ANNA
Not for me. For Evan.
KARA
Evan? You mean, the janitor Evan?
ANNA
No. I mean, my brother Evan. He’s smarter than you think. His grades were always better than mine. And he graduated top of his class.
KARA
Yeah. At a boys’ school.
ANNA
You really think that makes a difference?
KARA
Don’t you?
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM DIRECTOR’S OFFICE — DAY
JENNY, the quirky, meticulously dressed gray-haired museum director, is seated at her desk leafing through a stack of papers when Anna hesitantly peeks into her office.
ANNA
Jenny? Do you have a minute?
Jenny looks up from the papers and smiles welcomingly at Anna.
JENNY
Of course. Come on in.
Anna inches into the office, looking around. The walls are jam packed with certificates and photographs of historical moments. Bookshelves filled with thick volumes and artifacts line the walls. Every inch of Jenny’s enormous desk is covered with clutter.
ANNA
Oh. Wow.
Noticing Anna’s expression, Jenny looks around the office ruefully.
JENNY
Yeah . . . I might have cleaned up if I’d known you were coming. But probably not.
ANNA
I won’t take much of your time. I’m just here to inquire about the opening on the research team.
Jenny suddenly perks up.
JENNY
I didn’t know you were interested in research. Please. Sit down.
Jenny gestures to the chair in front of her desk that is already partially filled with old newspapers and magazines. Anna hesitates and then moves the stack onto the floor before sitting.
JENNY
Now. What kind of experience do you have in research?
ANNA
Oh, I’m not asking for myself. I’m asking about the job for my twin brother Evan.
JENNY
Evan?
ANNA
You may have seen him around. He’s currently employed with a local office cleaning company.
JENNY
A janitor?
ANNA
Yes. At the moment. But I know he’s more than capable of this position. I took a look at the list of job requirements and—
JENNY
I’m going to stop you right there, Anna. While I appreciate what you are trying to do for your brother, he’s not the right fit for this position.
ANNA
What do you mean? Why not? You haven’t even met him.
JENNY
I don’t need to. Anna, this position is open only to women.
Jenny folds her hands matter-of-factly. Anna stares at Jenny blankly.
ANNA
Only to women? I didn’t see that on the job description.
JENNY
Oh, you won’t. Equal opportunity and all that. But it’s only a matter of time before that gets repealed as well.
ANNA
What—?
JENNY
Anna, look around you. Has it never occurred to you that all of your coworkers are female? Did you think that just happened by accident?
Anna stands.
ANNA
Are you telling me you won’t hire a man?
JENNY
I’m telling you, I don’t have to. There are more than enough qualified women that could take this position.
ANNA
I cannot believe what I’m hearing.
Jenny laughs.
JENNY
You act like we’re the only organization doing it. But I’ve got contacts at the National Gallery, the Smithsonian, Holocaust Memorial who sre all doing the exact same thing. Even the international Spy Museum! Their last male employee just retired on Tuesday.
ANNA
By choice?
Jenny stands with a sigh and crosses to the door.
JENNY
Come on, Anna. Don’t be that way. This isn’t some sort of conspiracy. It’s just the way the world is going. You’re already on board, so don’t rock the boat, okay?
Jenny opens the office door.
JENNY
Thanks for coming.
Shell shocked, Anna leaves the office.
INT. WOMEN’S HISTORY MUSEUM HALLWAY — DAY — CONTINUOUS
Displayed on the wall outside the office is a replica of the Declaration of Independence. Anna’s gaze lands directly on the phrase “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”
Anna’s cell phone buzzes in her pocket. She pulls it out and sees a text from Evan: “Any news?”
Anna pockets the cell phone again without responding.
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Wendy’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is that I need to stretch my imagination some more to add key missing elements in. I also learned that because I did not do an empowering session, I flailed until I remembered to do it, then after doing it I felt better and did a better job.
Act Two Scene 2 and 3 outline
Scene 2
Beginning: At the hotel Michele, has to defend herself and one of the band members sits on her computer and phone and she has no way of getting ahold of Dean.
Middle: At a restaurant Dean surprises Michele and there is a scuffle with real biker dudes. the band escapes.
End: At hotel Michele has to divulge that she is an FBI agent and looking for her kids. Dean returns the ring.
Scene 3
Beginning: Michele fires up the new equipment, talks to Dean, he is mean to her and she almost quits.
Middle: One of the band members uses his kid like mind and figures out what the ring really means.
End: They go to next concert ready to capture the bad guys.
INT. HOTEL LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Michele drops her things as she enters the door of the HOTEL ROOM, walks over to the COUCH and flops down like a rag doll and stares into the air as if entranced by it. Keith and Ezra sit one on each side of her.
MICHELE
Do you want the truth or a good lie?
KEITH AND EZRA
Truth
MICHELE
(blasé)
I am an undercover FBI agent in search of my children who have been kidnaped by the Krensha mob and I have to find them before they kill me and possibly both of you when they find us.
Keith and Ezra lean back to look at each other and exchange glances of non-belief, lean forward again.
KEITH
Okay, let’s try the lie.
Michele stands up and begins pacing.
MICHELE
You two just don’t get it. Those are MY kids out there!
Michele begins to cry and sits back down.
EZRA
Gee, are you serious?
MICHELE
Of course I am serious, why do you think…..
EZRA
Wait…did you say “kill us too?”
MICHELE
Yes
(off their stunned looks)
Look, I know I have put you two in danger but….
KEITH
Isn’t that putting it mildly?
MICHELE
You are in good hands with me… and I have no other choice. I must save my kids and put the Krensha back into the 14th century where they belong.
(beat)
I will NOT stop until I have my children back!
EZRA
Wow, they are time travelers?
KEITH
(to Ezra)
No, they are not.
(to Michele)
Michele, what can we do to help?
MICHELE
You really mean that?
Keith and Ezra nod, Michele begins to cry and hugs them both.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Oh thank you!!
(sniffle)
(to Michele)
Michele, what can we do to help?
MICHELE (CONT’D)
You really mean that?
Keith and Ezra nod, Michele begins to cry and hugs them both.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Oh thank you!!
(sniffle)
Knock on the door, Michele draws gun, the guys cower away and Michele just rolls her eyes at them.
She opens the door, suddenly, gun at the ready… Nobody at door… she makes sure the hall is clear, notices something on the floor: She drops her hands and her whole body relaxes as she leans over to pick it up: A small box with a napkin draped over it.
A folded piece of paper on top of the napkin with Michele’s ring topping the mound like a cherry on an ice cream Sunday. She picks up the ring in one hand, inspecting it, and gathers everything else with the other arm.
She brings the stuff in and sets it down on the coffee table but still intently focused on the ring. Keith and Ezra slowly begin to approach her.
KEITH
(extremely nervous)
Is it safe? I… I mean is it a bomb?
Michele is gazing at the ring grinning like a school-girl who just received her first boyfriend’s class ring. She answers without breaking the stare.
MICHELE
Yes.
EZRA
How do you know?
Michele gestures to the ring.
MICHELE
Becuse this is the ring I gave him.
KEITH
Who?
MICHELE
My partner. You know the one at the restaurant helping us escape.
EZRA
(confused)
You gave him a ring and.. He gave it back…. But you are happy about it?
Michele nods yes in an dreamy state.
EZRA (CONT’D)
Women.
KEITH
Are you going to open this or do I get to?
Michele begins to come out of her ethereal fog.
MICHELE
What? Open what? Ohhh, that.
KEITH
Yes this. You know I believe in finders-keepers rules.
MICHELE
I am certain that you do. However, the box belongs to the federal government.
Michele playfully snatches the box from Keith.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
I don’t think you want to find out what the government’s penalties are for not playing by their rules. I’m sure it is more that just a simple lose your turn.
KEITH
I think you might be right.
Michele opens the box. Inside is a new lap top and a cell phone. Michele shakes her head in an I-can’t-believe-this manner. While Keith and Michele begin to start up the phone and lap top, Ezra picks up the ring and intently looks at the symbols carved into it.
MICHELE
Hey! Give me that!
Michele almost drops the phone as she tries to retrieve the ring. She holds out her hand.
EZRA
But this is so cool, it looks like my secret decoder ring I had when I was a kid. But these letters don’t spell anything. Look, see for yourself.
MICHELE
Just look at what?
EZRA
Here
(points to the ring as if she was silly for not seeing it.)
Each symbol has a letter carved into it. But they don’t spell out anything.
KEITH
Ez, I don’t see anything.
MICHELE
I don’t see anything either.
EZRA
(frustrated)
Come on, it is right there.
MICHELE
Okay, if it is there then what does it say?
EZRA
Something about being hot… like hot-ting-grrr.. Or hottinger… Um I dunno.
MICHELE
Are you sure?? Show me!
INTERCUT CLOSE UP OF THE RING – DETAIL SHOT of the symbols as Ezra outlines a letter within a symbol. Michele takes the ring from Ezra and looks at each symbol. She is amazed with each one she focuses on.
EZRA
See, told ya.
MICHELE
They are there! But, what does it mean?
EZRA
Does it have anything to do with the engraving on the inside?
Michele looks at the inside of the ring, DETAIL SHOT OF ENGRAVING on inside of ring “ZURICH HOLDS OUR LOVE 11-04-55”
MICHELE
Oh, that is the engraving of when he and his wife were married in Switzerland.
EZRA
Wow, you worked with an old dude.
MICHELE
No, he was in his forties when I knew him.
EZRA
If he was married in 1955, then he was probably born somewhere around 1935 to 1938. If he was alive now, then he would be in his eighties. Right?
Michele is confused. She believes the math but knows otherwise.
MICHELE
No, he was not any older than 45.
KEITH
Then that cannot be a marriage date.
MICHELE
But, I remember the picture on his desk. It was of him and his wife in front of a church in Switzerland. And the date underneath…. November 4th, oh yeah, there was not a year printed engraved on the frame.
(she stares into the distance as if looking at the picture)
Wait!… It wasn’t Zurich either, it was Geneva.
EZRA
Bummer, someone engraved the ring wrong.
Michele suddenly realizes what the ring is.
MICHELE
Hottinger is a BANK in Zurich!
KEITH
(to Ezra)
Boy, those random thoughts of hers just seem to pop up at the darndest times.
MICHELE
(ecstatic)
OH MY GOSH! Do you understand what this means?
(begins to talk to the air)
That is it… I had it all along… the answer was on my finger for the last 10 years. Oh… my… gosh. oh my gosh, oh mY GOSH!
(looks at the guys with urgent eyes)
I gotta tell Dean.
Michele scrambles to finish setting up the phone. The guys are stunned and do not understand what is going on.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
What!? No charge!
Ezra is looking in the box for the power cord, finds it, hands it to Michele. Michele hands it to Keith.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Plug this in please.
She holds onto the power cord until he looks at her.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Swiss! It is always the Swiss. Why didn’t I think of this sooner??
Keith plugs in his end as Michele plugs hers in.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Com’on com’on already, boot up!
A beep is heard all breathe a sigh of relief.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
(mumbling under her breath)
Email…password… What do you mean it is wrong! Arrgghh!!!
Michele tries more times and gets in. The phone beeps again. DETAIL SHOT OF PHONE SCREEN “Updating phone this may take several hours.
EZRA
Bummer.
MICHELE
Now what am I going to do?
Michele slouches over in a chair. Putting her head in her hands.
EZRA
Have you tried calling him?
MICHELE
Talking through hands. I can’t use the land-line, it’s not secure. Besides I don’t know his number.
EZRA
Can you try face time?
Michele and Keith both look at Ezra bewildered.
MICHELE
The phone is still updating.
EZRA
Can you use an i-Pad?
MICHELE
That is sweet of you to offer your i-Pad, but it is still not a secure link and I still don’t know how to access him.
EZRA
The information might be in here.
Ezra hands her the i-Pad found in the box already up and running.
MICHELE
This isn’t yours?
Ezra shakes his head no.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Then where did you get it from?
EZRA
It was in the box with the phone.
Michele is amazed. She gives Ezra a big hug. Keith finds a note also in the box, and begins to read it out loud.
KEITH
It says here on the card that
(clearing his throat)
Just in case someone breaks into our conversation we needed code names. So you are Skully and I am Moulder.
They all giggle, Michele tries to regain composure. She locates the inter office messaging app, pulls it up. Hits his name.
INTERCUT OF WHO IS TALKING.
DEAN (V.O.)
(attempting to be suave)
Moulder here…..
Dean is in a car speeding down the highway.
MICHELE
(holding back the laughter)
I don’t think that we need to use names or code names. I can see who you are.
DEAN
So I see you found everything aright.
MICHELE
Yes, I did find the stuff… except I can’t use my phone.
DEAN
Why is that? Is there something wrong with it?
MICHELE
No, I don’t think that there is anything wrong with the phone, it seems, though, that the stupid thing is frozen in the circle of death and is “updating” for the next hour because the dope that got me the phone did not activate it!
DEAN
Ummm, well, actually it was only supposed to take about 20 minutes.
MICHELE
That doesn’t matter! How am I supposed to get information to you if I can’t access the phone?
(beat)
What if had I something really important to tell you?
(justifying)
What then??
Dean straightens from his beaten slumped posture realizing that Michele is using the means by which he gave her to contact him with. Almost flabbergasted, we can see his mind racing through all of the ugly things he wants to say, trying to select the most painful statement as a rebuttal.
DEAN
Wait a minute! I am not the moron here! You are the one who is on the tablet I sent you. Lemme guess, you just wanted something to argue about. You ….. arE … SUCH … A FEMALE!!
Michele hides her face from the camera stunned that he was right. Then quickly shows her face again.
MICHELE
W..ww..well, what if I have something important to tell you and I don’t want just anyone picking up on this signal.
DEAN
HA!! It IS a secure line.
MICHELE
And just what if it is not? This information is too priceless to just blurt out over the open airwaves.
DEAN
Yeah, right! What information could be so sensitive to this case that you could not tell me on inner office messaging?!
Michele suddenly remembers the information about the ring and forgets that they are fighting and suddenly turns into a giddy person again.
MICHELE
(exploding with excitement)
OH MY GOSH! Oh my gosh, the th.. the ring! The ring is.. Oh wait till you hear this! I know what the ring means. I mean I figured it out…
DEAN
Shhhhh! Not so loud!
MICHELE
Well, that is Ezra actually figured it out.
(beat)
But, whatever, we have the answer. We can now access the Krensha’s account!
Michele gleam with delight as if she has just unveiled a treasure map. She awaits for an approving sound from the seriously angry Dean.
DEAN
(sarcastically)
GEE, I guess we can forget about security and scream the information out the window so no one misses any OTHER details.
MICHELE
(confused and hurt)
But you sai… Oh now you just wait a minute, you are the one who said that…
DEAN
Secure line… yes. However, did you sweep the room for other devices?
MICHELE
No. I was distracted by…
DEAN
Distracted?! See! I told you that you were too rusty.
MICHELE
(stunned and saddened)
Maybe you are right. Come get the ring. I’m pulling myself off the case as of right now.
Dean realizes he has once again said the wrong thing and tries to find the words to make it better. In his babbling Michele disconnects. Dean is furious at himself. He looks at the tablet as if it were a real person.
DEAN
NO. Don’t do this now!
Dean throws the tablet, looks around outside the windows of the car for other traffic, none is seen, he quickly whips the car around and heads in the opposite direction. We hear the engine rev up as we watch it speed away.
INT. HOTEL LIVING ROOM – NIGHT
Michele slowly puts the tablet down and begins to sweep the room for bugging devices. The guys watch but are unsure of what to say. Michele finishes and slumps down onto the couch, dazed. Keith motions Ezra to follow him to the couch and the sit on either side of her. The look at her but she is so deep in thought she does not see them.
KEITH
Hey, you okay?
As she answers she does not break her gaze.
MICHELE
(whispering)
Nope.
EZRA
Is it something we did?
Michele begins to answer in the same tone and candor.
MICHELE
Nop..
Michele realizes that the guys thought they had done something wrong. She breaks her stare and looks at Ezra with compassionate sorrowful eyes while her hand pats his with a calming touch.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
No, you did nothing wrong. I messed up and it just cost me my job and maybe my children.
Ezra’s wheels are turning in his head trying to understand.
EZRA
You mean that when the FBI gets your children back from the bad guys, they wont give them back to you?
Michele struggles to find a simple way of explaining the whole issue.
MICHELE
No. No. I mean that the search for my children is over and the bad guys win and they will probably kill my children.
EZRA
OH!
INT. HOTEL LIVING ROOM – LATER
All of the items are safely tucked back into the box that Dean sent, except for the tablet. Michele looks at it longingly hoping to turn back time and fix things. She takes a deep breath, sighs and puts the tablet back into the box with the other items.
MICHELE
Okay, that is the last of the stuff.
EZRA
Is there no other way?
KEITH
Yeah, there has to be something that we can do.
MICHELE
(to Ezra)
Here, you take the ring and give it to Dean. You are the only one who understood it so you should be the one to explain it to the Fed’s. I need to be leaving.
Tears are welling up in Michele’s eyes as she hands the ring to Ezra. A noise is heard outside in the hall, Michele draws her gun. The door is kicked in, Michele is at the ready. The dust settles and a person begins to step through the doorway.
MICHELE (CONT’D)
Hand’s up!!
DEAN
Hey! That is twice in one night that you have had a gun pointed at me. I’m beginning to get a complex.
MICHELE
If I am so rusty then why have you been on the wrong side of my gun?
DEAN
Oh, no, you are not going to do this, you are not quitting on me. Maybe I said something wrong. Maybe you took it wrong, or just maybe we were both wrong.
Michele still aiming looks at Dean in an ‘Oh yeah’ manner whit one eyebrow raised.
DEAN (CONT’D)
Okay, okay, I was the one who was wrong. I am sorry.
Michele doesn’t move. Dean looks into her eyes, realizes he cares and must be straight with her. His body and tone of voice softens.
DEAN (CONT’D)
I can’t do this case without you.
Michele hears the sincerity in his words. She is also captured by his eyes and softens.
DEAN (CONT’D)
The gun?…. Can you put it down now?
Michele still aiming but she smiles.
MICHELE
Can I trust you?
DEAN
(trying to be funny)
Well,… That all depends….
Dean tries his best sexy smile. Michele stiffens again.
DEAN (CONT’D)
(seriously)
Yes, yes you can trust me.
Michele lowers the gun, her expression turns into curiosity with half disbelief. Keith looks up from his cowering position on the floor right besides Michele only to find the gun is now pointing at him by mistake.
KEITH
AAAHHHH!
MICHELE
(putting gun away)
Oops. Sorry.
(to Dean)
Do you have a plan?
DEAN
I think.
Michele just stares blankly at Dean.
DEAN (CONT’D)
Well… at least I have a good idea.
MICHELE
Good! Then you should have a good story to tell Mr. Henderson when he gets the bill for the busted door.
EZRA
Hey Keith, are you keeping score? I think she got the point for this one.
KEITH
I think you might be right.
DEAN
(disgusted, but pushing on)
Come on, let’s go. I have some intel that indicates that they should be at the next concert.
MICHELE
(tears welling up)
I pray you are right.
EXT. CONCERT ARENA – NIGHT
Dean is posing as the director of the concert hall. He has a thingie in his ear that makes him look like a secret service agent. In the access corridor behind the stage Michele, Keith, Ezra, and the real DIRECTOR wait like ducks in the marshes with hunters close by. Dean begins to open the partition to get behind the booth where they all are waiting for the impending doom. The tension is thick enough to choke the very breath form Dean. As Dean’s hand appears on the inside of the access corridor he triggers a jumping response from everyone.
DEAN
Geeze, will all of you relax?!
Everyone stares at Dean without signs of relaxing. Dean shakes his head in disgust.
DEAN (CONT’D)
Is everyone ready?
Slow nods from all but not convincingly that they are all really sure of what to do. Dean points to each one firmly as he addresses them.
DEAN (CONT’D)
(for what feels like the thousandth time)
Look, you two know how to sing, you know how to be a mom, and you know how to sit and do nothing.
(beat)
Right??
All faces lighten and begin to nod in firm agreement that they remember they are just doing what comes natural.
DEAN (CONT’D)
Good. We have agents at all entrances. They can’t get by us without being captured.
The audience is growing and 3 black limos pull up to the entrance. Dean turns his head slightly towards the ear that has the earpiece listening to whomever is on the other end.
DEAN (CONT’D)
They are here.
Everyone stiffens again.
DEAN (CONT’D)
You guys have to be kidding me. Breathe. Nine out of ten doctors recommend it.
MICHELE
But…
DEAN
(interrupting)
You’ve got this.
THE ANNOUNCER (O.S.)
… And ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the time of your life. I need not introduce the amazing band we have tonight. So, here we go! Enjoy!
The crowd goes wild with excitement.
DEAN
Okay everyone, let’s do this.
Dean puts his hand out in front of him as if they were a sports team pumping up for action. They all just stare at him and turn to go to their perspective places.
MICHELE
(shaking head)
Really?
Dean mimics her sarcastically and throws his hand up in the air as if everyone had joined him.
DEAN
And, go team!
The band starts to play and Michele climbs up in the rafters and scours the crowd. She spots one of the mob members and almost falls off the beam she is balancing on.
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LESSON FOURTEEN
Kevin’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is it took several scenes to show the plan getting put into action.
EXT. DEPARTMENT STORE – DAY
Joker slides furtively to and fro in front of a row of televisions in a department sore.
JOKER
Come on Battie, come on…
A news report rolls a banner reading breaking news Batman appears on the screen.
JOKER
Ha ha! There you are… I knew you were out there somewhere!
BATMAN
This is a message for the coward who calls himself The Joker. There’s no need to harm innocent children and day care workers if it’s me you’re after.
JOKER
Ha ha ha! You! You’re the one who will put an end to this miserable existence. I’ve got you now!
BATMAN
Meet me in the colosseum tomorrow at midnight. I’ll be alone.
Joker laughs and laughs. Those around watching in disgust.
JOKER
Oh no you don’t. We play by my rules, oh bat one.
INT. DAYCARE CENTER TWO – DAY
Joker stands in the middle of the daycare center. Around him are children chained to desks, play equipment and each other. A camera sits in front of him as he sits on the floor, building a letter block tower.
JOKER
Tick tock Batman, Tick tock. High noon approaches and these little ones want to get back to their blocks.
He strings a wire through the middle of the blocks and wiring them to a red button with a clown face in the middle of it.
OKER
I saw your little message, and as much as I’d love to come to your little rendezvous, it will be 12 hours too late! We already have a date which expires in 4 hours!
He finishes wiring the button, and moves the camera as he stands and points it to the button and then all around the room at the crying and sobbing children.
JOKER
This button will disable the bombs located in the middle of this here room! Saving all the little kiddies here!
He starts dancing around the room handing out suckers and candy to the children.
JOKER
Hurry Batman, all you have to do is find them and push the little red button! In the light of day. Better hurry!
INT. WAYNE MANOR – DAY
Bruce is drinking a green shake, making faces and choking it down. Ali is at the computer display eliminating sections of Gotham and trying to track the signal.
BRUCE
Damnit!
ALI
Got him!
Joker stared hard into the camera.
JOKER
Oh, and before you think the cavalry can save the day, they can’t see this!
He cackles uncontrollably.
JOKER
That’s right! I know where you are! Not actually of course or I’d blow you to oblivion but your digital imprint allowed me to open a tunnel and downstream directly to you! Thanks to AI, this is a love letter directly from me to you! Tick tock!
The screen blanks out.
BRUCE
Where’s the suit?
He jumps off the treadmill and opens the pneumatic closet that holds his suits. He pulls one out and holds it up. It’s half his size.
ALI
A few too many chips, Bruce?
BRUCE
Shut up. What are we going to do?
ALI
In 4 hours? I have no idea. You could send someone else.
BRUCE
Not possible. You saw him.
ALI
In the suit no one will know the difference.
BRUCE
Even if there was someone, I’m not putting someone else in danger.
ALI
It’s pushing a button.
BRUCE
It’s never just pushing a button.
ALI
Okay then, You can squeeze into the mask, right, I have an idea. We can just make it.
She circles an address, and swipes it off the screen.
-
Chris Dorsey’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is to stop myself when I get stuck and to remind myself about the rules of the High Speed Writing Process.
Concept — When an innocent man is incarcerated with some of the country’s most dangerous psychopaths, he must rely on/embrace his voices/his mental illness to win his freedom.
Main Conflict — The Antagonist and the system try to shut up, stop, and eventually kill the Protagonist, because the Protagonist is a threat to the prison’s status quo — SURVIVAL.
Old Ways — Avoidant/hiding (hiding his own MH symptoms), super helpful and optimistic, Polly Anna-ish. Connects with others but through his “silver lining” approach.
New Ways — Empathetic/connects to others on a real level, group leader, courageous, fights for the rights of mentally-ill inmates.
THEME (add): Fair and humane treatment of the mentally ill. Good verses evil and the apathetic. Overcoming challenges to heal and/or live with a mental illness; acceptance and healing.
BEAT SHEET
ACT I
INT/EXT. PRISON GATE – DAY
The sign outside reads: “XXX [insert].”
OPENING: A caged bus transports Wilbert McNutt and a dozen inmates through the prison gates. Wilbert, unlike the other inmates, is wearing a straight jacket. He’s also relaxed and smiling. The other inmates keep their distance.
INT. SHOWERS – LATER
Wilbert showers by himself. Another inmate enters and checks him out. Wilbert smiles, uncomfortable, then turns to the side to hide his private parts.
INT. INMATE BARBER SHOP – LATER
Wilbert gets a haircut from the PRISON BARBERS. It’s the worst haircut anyone’s ever gotten. His bangs cut down to the nub, his sides kept longer. The Barbers hand in a mirror to Wilbert and laugh at his reaction. He begrudgingly thanks the Barbers for the haircut.
WILBERT
Uh… Thanks?
INT. LARGE ROOM – LATER
Beginning: Wilbert starts chatting to another new, mental health inmate. The other inmate gives him some tips on how to stay safe and survive prison.
NEW INMATE
…
Middle: Antagonist Beat #1: Meets Wilbert McNutt in intake. The Antagonist stares at another inmate (his new roommate) and other inmate drops dead on the spot — “if looks could kill?” The officers are slow to respond. The officers give in and give the Antagonist a cell of his own.
End: He gets shouted at by the DEPUTY WARDEN for asking too many questions. Wilbert might be responding to a voice in his head. The officer responds, “I wasn’t talking to you, McNutt. And, by the way that has to be the dumbest haircut I’ve ever scene. No wonder you’re here.”
ANTAGONIST
I always get my own cell.
INT. MEDICAL UNIT, EXAMINATION ROOM – DAY
Wilbert undergoes a medical/psychiatric evaluation. He’s on medications to help control his voices. The PSYCHITRIST goes over Wilbert’s mental health and criminal history.
Beginning:
Middle:
End:
INT. CELLBLOCK – DAY
PLACEHOLDER: Insert dorm scene where another inmate jumps off the second floor and lands on the ground right in front of Wilbert. ALPHA DOG (aka A-DOG), another building sociopath, seems to somehow be responsible for this.
TE1: Wilbert witnesses the Alpha Dog, and his group, rev-up another mental health inmate before this inmate freaks out. The inmate is cuffed and hauled off by the officers. He realizes that mental health treatment might be the last thing he’s going to receive in this prison.
Antagonist Beat #2: He takes on the current dorm alpha dog and wins. He takes over the dorm businesses and lays down the law to his “workers.”
PLACEHOLDER: Snapshot — “He [the Antagonist] did this at another prison… Stay away from him.”
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert seeks legal advice to have his case appealed.
INT. CELLBLOCK – DAY
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert settles into the unit and the routine. The do’s and don’t’s, how it works, and the calm before the storm.
Beginning: Wilbert eats an awful tasting breakfast, but he puts a positive spin on it. “Why do they put all the jackers in the kitchen?” “Jackers?” “Yes…”
Middle: [insert] a funny scene, like DR court or Warden & Deputy Warden rounds.
Middle: His cellmate/sidekick casually tells Wilbert what different people havE been convicted of — “Him over there, he ate a bunch of people… That one over there, he was a cult leader. The feds burnt down his compound, but he managed to escape. Stay away from him, he’ll try to recruit you to his new “religious” discussion group. It gets worse as it goes on. “Like him, what did he do?” He can’t hear you… toothpaste in his ears.
End: Lights out. Wilbert goes to sleep. He sighs to himself; today wasn’t that bad.
INT. CELLBLOCK – NEXT MORNING
PLACEHOLDER: “6:00 AM” appears on the screen. A loud siren wakes Wilbert out of his sleep. He sits up in his bed in shock.
INT./EXT. ANTAGONIST’S CELL – DAY
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert witnesses the Antagonist slap around another inmate, PINKY.
Beginning: Wilbert hears some commotion and stops outside the Antagonist’s cell. The Antagonist has PINKY (40) by the collar. He slaps the PINKY across the face.
ANTAGONIST
If you don’t make good, I’m going to rape that ass.
Middle: Wilbert slips away without being seen.
End: Wilbert approaches Pinky later. The inmate asks Wilbert to help him.
PINKY
You have to help me. The Antagonist has it in for me.
WILBERT
But why you?
PINKY
He conned me and now I owe him.
WILBERT
I don’t know.
PINKY
Please…
INT. COUNSELING OFFICE – DAY
INCITING INCIDENT: Wilbert “snitches” to his therapist that the Antagonist is bullying and causing harm to other inmates in the dorm.
Shortly after, the Antagonist gets cuffed and hauled off to the Isolation Unit. He threatens to kill whomever ratted him out. Wilbert reluctantly, and with the help of the voice,
Beginning: Wilbert’s voice talks him into meeting with his Mental Health Counselor.
Middle: Wilbert tells him about what the Antagonist is doing in the dorm; drugs, prostitution, and other misdeeds.
End: The Mental Health Counselor assures Wilbert that this will be investigated and the Antagonist will most likely be transferred to general population at another prison.
PLACEHOLDER: The CAPTAIN investigates the allegations against the Antagonist.
Beginning: He reviews camera footage, but sees nothing. He tells his Lieutenant to investigate further.
Middle: The Captain reviews statements — “He’s a great guy.” “No issues here.” “If I don’t get statements.”
CAPTAIN
Great guy? Unbelievable.
End: The Captain captures something on video that no one else sees.
INT. CELLBLOCK – DAY
Beginning: The CERT Unit storms the dorm. The Antagonist puts up a fight, takes a couple of hits from the shock shield, but eventually goes down.
Middle: The Antagonist is told to say goodbye for good to all the inmates in the dorm. He’s going to general population at the most dangerous prison in the state — “You’re being transferred to…” The Antagonist’s eyes go wide in fear. His days of taking advantage of others is over.
End: The Antagonist is cuffed and dragged out of the dorm kicking and screaming — “…but I am crazy!” The Antagonist assaults the officers before he is cuffed. The dorm celebrates. Pinky mouths “thank you” to Wilbert. Wilbert smiles back at him.
INT./EXT. ISOLATION CELL – NIGHT
Beginning: The Antagonist paces the cell. He hears a noise outside his cell and sees the nurse giving out pills. He shouts out to the nurse and gets an insult in return.
Middle: He notices someone; the staff Psychiatrist. He calls the “visiting” psychiatrist over and spins a bullshit story to the psychiatrist. He charms, fakes symptoms, and even makes a veiled threat to commit suicide.
End: The Psychiatrist considers for a moment. The Antagonist’s found the right sucker. The Antagonist smiles to himself.
PLACEHOLDER: Instead of being transferred to another prison, the Antagonist manipulates his way back onto the cellblock. An additional 5 years have been added to his time and he is out for blood. Wilbert realizes the system is broken and the guards are in on it.
Turning Point: The Antagonist is released back into the dorm.
INT. CELLBLOCK – MORNING
Beginning: It’s calm in the dorm. Inmates are smiling, drinking coffee, and talking/joking around with each other. Two inmates chase each other playing grab-ass.
Middle: There’s a commotion outside. Smiles disappear from the inmates standing closest to the dorm’s entrance. Jaws drop and they stand in stunned silence shaking there heads.
End: The Antagonist walks back into the cellblock with a triumphant but sinister smile on his face. The rest of the inmates go silent. Wilbert slowly backs into his cell.
ACT II
INT. WILBERT’S CELL – LATER
Wilbert, his cellmate, and Pinky try to figure out what happened between last night and this morning that led to the Antagonist’s release.
WILBERT
I don’t understand. We all heard the Lieutenant say he was going to transfer him to another prison. What the fu — hell, happened?
PINKY
What happens if he finds out it was us who turned him in?
Pinky shrugs his shoulders.
CELLMATE
He found the right sucker and talked his way out of getting transferred. Probably pulled the mental health card.
WILBERT
So now what do we do?
PINKY
I heard they might give him another five years for spitting on the officers. I think he’s really mad.
CELLMATE
(duh)
You think?
End: Wilbert says he caused the problem, so he’ll have to fix it.
WILBERT
I caused the problem, I’ll fix it.
INT. CELLBLOCK – LATER
The Antagonist threatens the rest of the inmates “I’m too smart for all of you. So, don’t try it. And I will figure who ratted me out.”
Beginning: Wilbert
Middle:
End:
INT. ANTAGONIST’S CELL – NIGHT
Placeholder: Wilbert is going to win the Antagonist over at any cost. He is going to kill the Antagonist with kindness.
Wilbert sheepishly knocks on the Antagonist’s door.
WILBERT
Knock, knock. Can I come in?
ANTAGONIST
You’re smart, I need you to help find out who ratted on me. I probably going to get another five years shoved up my ass.
WILBERT
Sorry.
ANTAGONIST
Sorry? Why are you sorry?
WILBERT
I mean, I’m just sorry that that might happen to you. You don’t deserve that.
ANTAGONIST
Yeah, you’re right. I don’t deserve that. I’ve been watching you getting pretty chummy with these officers.
Wilbert panics.
WILBERT
If I violated some sort of prison code, I’m sorry, I didn’t know.
Antagonist glares at Wilbert
ANTAGONIST
That’s not what I meant. These officers really seem to listen to you. Maybe you’re full of shit and this is some sort of an act, but I think you might be able to help me.
WILBERT
Help you? How?
ANTAGONIST
I want you to stand in as my inmate rep in Disciplinary Court.
WILBERT
Oh… Okay. What would I have to do?
ANTAGONIST
Lie your head off.
WILBERT
I’m not very good at lying —
ANTAGONIST
You better be.
WILBERT
Well, I guess put a positive spin on things.
ANTAGONIST
Yeah, do that. Put a positive spin on things. That’ll work.
Wilbert exits.
PLACEHOLDER: INSERT INT. LAW LIBRARY -DAY
Wilbert does research on mental health and hygiene law. “How in God’s name am I going to defend this guy?” Start at the law library.
INT. CELLBLOCK – DAY
Place Holder: The Antagonist addresses the dorm. He uses a lighter approach… Maybe?
Middle: Wilbert compliments the Antagonist and hits the Antagonist with his optimistic way of looking at the world.
End: Wilbert agrees to represent the Antagonist to DR court. “If only there was someone smart enough to talk them out of shoving five years up my ass. Wilbert tells the Antagonist he’s going to ask the Deputy Warden if he can be there.
INT. ISOLATION CELLBLOCK, PRISON COURT ROOM – DAY
Wilbert sits in a chair in the court with a Deputy Warden. The Sergeant explains Wilbert’s role in DR Court.
SEARGEANT
Alright, McNutt, all you have to do as a Peer Advocate is sit there and keep your mouth shut.
WILBERT
But what if I have something to say or I have a question?
SEARGEANT
Don’t say it, don’t ask it. This whole Peer Advocate thing is just a formality. Just some bleeding heart from the State Office making sure your rights are protected. We don’t follow it.
WILBERT
Uh, okay?
SEARGEANT
Bring in the first inmate.
Two OFFICERS bring in INMATE JOHNSON (25), shackled.
SEARGEANT
Johnson, you’ve been written up for exposure/exhibition. The female officer wrote, “Inmate Johnson, had his hand down his pants and was moving it back in forth in a rhythmic manner. How do you plead?
INMATE JOHNSON
Not guilty, sir.
SEARGEANT
So, you’re telling me my officer is lying? Come on.
INMATE JOHNSON
I’m not saying that. You see, what happened was a bee flew up my pant leg and up to my genitalia area. Like any normal person would do, I put my hand down my pants and said, “Shoo, bee. Get out of my pants.”
Inmate Johnson gestures with his hands to reenact the event.
INMATE JOHNSON
I can understand how it could look like I was masturbating, but I swear to God I wasn’t doing that.
SERGEANT
Any of you believe this?
The two Officers shake their heads “no”, barely able to contain themselves from bursting into fits of laughter.
The Sergeant looks at Inmate Johnson, who shoots the Sergeant a hopeful look. The Sergeant explodes into fits of laughter.
Inmate Johnson starts laughing.
SERGEANT
Johnson, I give you an “A” for creativity, but an “F” for you behaviors. I am going to find you guilty of —
WILBERT
If I may interject, Sergeant.
SERGEANT
What is it, McNutt?!
WILBERT
I think his explanation of what happened is totally plausible. There are a lot bees outside and some of them get into the dorm. I even got stung the other day. A bee flew up my sleeve and stung me on my arm. See …
Wilbert rolls up his sleeve and shows the Sergeant a red bug bite mark on his arm.
WILBERT
… So I think he could be telling the truth. I’m asking the court to give him the benefit of doubt and find him not guilty today. And if he does it again, you can sentence him isolation with no doubts.
The Sergeant considers for a moment.
SERGEANT
I’m going to go against my better judgment today and find Inmate Johnson not guilty. Officers, take the shackles off and cut him loose.
Inmate Johnson smiles. He can’t believe his luck.
SERGEANT
Officers, bring in the Protagonist.
Six CERT Officers escort the Protagonist from his isolation cell to the courtroom. The Officers plop him down into the seat.
SERGEANT
Protagonist, I just want to make this crystal clear. If you are found guilty today and decide to go ape shit, I have six officers waiting to pounce. Understood.
The Protagonist doesn’t respond.
SERGEANT
This is a pretty straight forward case. Do you have anything to say for yourself.
PROTAGONIST
I’m going to let my Peer Advocate speak for me.
All eyes turn to Wilbert. He stands to address the room.
WILBERT
If it pleases the court —
SERGEANT
It doesn’t.
WILBERT
He was off his mental health medications at the time of this incident. He reported to me he’s been trying very hard to do the right thing, but he missed a number of doses of his medications, which he feels caused him to behave the way he did. And for that, he is remorseful, but he was not in his right state of mind at the time.
SERGEANT
You expect me to believe all that, McNutt?
PROTAGONIST
The nurse refused to give me my medications [insert this].
WILBERT
He informed me that the nurse’s records will show he hasn’t received his mental health medications for the last two weeks.
And Mental Health Hygiene Law states that the Prison Authority should consider a lesser or nullification of a punitive sentence in these cases.
The Sergeant SIGHS, defeated.
SERGEANT
You’re two for two today, McNutt. Case dismissed.
INT. CELLBLOCK – LATER
Wilbert returns to the dorm as a hero. The inmates give him a new found level of respect.
The Antagonist enters the dorm. He goes immediately for Wilbert and gives him a hug. hugs Wilbert. The other inmates give Wilbert new found respect.
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert in therapy and resistant to tackling his issues.
PLACEHOLDER: DR COURT. Wilbert is asked to stand in as a Peer Advocate. “Hey, McNutt, we need…” Bee in the pants — “I think that’s plausible.”
PLACEHOLDER: The mop.
INT. CELLBLOCK, UPPER TIER – NIGHT
Beginning: A jacker with glaucoma tells Wilbert to move because he’s blocking his view.
Middle: Wilbert and his sidekick look around to look for the pretty officer with blond hair. They see no one.
End: It’s a mop.
PLACEHOLDER: Jumper scene.
PLACEHOLDER: Store trip/goods process.
PLACEHOLDER: Tossing cells for contraband.
New plan — Win the Antagonist over at any cost.
Wilbert has to handle/fix this situation himself.
Plan in action — He is going to kill the Antagonist with kindness. He’s going to ignore the voices in his head.
Antagonist Beat #3: Investigates/interrogates other inmates to see who ratted him out.
INT. CELLBLOCK – NIGHT
PLACEHOLDER — Wilbert uses self-help techniques with the other inmates in his circle.
Antagonist Beat #4: Shuts Wilbert down/argues with during group therapy.
INT. THERAPIST’S OFFICE – DAY
PLACEHOLDER: A therapy session to challenge Wilbert’s defense mechanisms. Wilbert expressed concerns that his medications are keeping him from living a real life.
INT. AUDITORIUM – DAY
The Antagonist requests Wilbert be transferred to his cell.
PLACEHOLDER: The plan fails because he gets pulled into the Antagonist’s lies and can no longer tolerate now being a part of it. The Antagonist is using him just like he is using everyone else.
INT. CELLBLOCK – MORNING
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert stops taking his psychiatric medications and his voices slowly shift from nice and manageable to mean and out of control.
Midpoint Turning Point: The Antagonist tries to kill Wilbert.
INT. ANTAGONIST’S CELL — NIGHT
The Antagonist manipulates Wilbert in to fessing up to snitching on the Antagonist. The Antagonist goes berserk and strangles Wilbert almost to death. Wilbert is saved by the other inmates. The Antagonist goes back to “the hole.”
ANTAGONIST
This is very hard for me to admit, but think you’re right. I need to change and become a better person.
WILBERT
I am so glad to hear you say that. I think you’ll love being a nicer person. You really will.
ANTAGONIST
ANTAGONIST
And now, I’m going to kill you.
WILBERT
But — but — but you said this was a safe space.
ANTAGONIST
I lied, you fucking fool….
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert seeks external legal help for protection after this event. He also asks for his case to be appealed.
TE 3: After he stops taking his medications, Wilbert learns his auditory hallucinations may actually help him survive.
TE 4: Wilbert uncovers evidence that could lead to his conviction being overturned in the appeals process.
TE 5: Wilbert gets shanked in the back.
PLACEHOLDER: The voices start telling/making Wilbert do bad things. It gets him some respect but also gets him sent to “the hole.”
Antagonist Beat #5: Manipulates Wilbert, through Wilbert’s auditory hallucinations, to turn on the other inmates.
INT. LAW LIBRARY – DAY
PLACEHOLDER: Wilbert researches case law for his appeal.
PLACEHOLDER: A newly assigned pro bono attorney responds to one of Wilbert’s letters and meets him in person.
ACT 3:
Antagonist Beat #7: Plots to kill Wilbert by someone else’s hands and to make it look like an accident. Wilbert, by dumb luck alone, escapes these attempts.
Rethink everything — He discovers that acknowledging one’s own pain, instead of being in denial, and “getting real” is the only way he will ever be able to defeat the Antagonist.
New plan — Wilbert realizes that the voices in his head (i.e. Auditory hallucinations) are actually there to help him. He embraces the voices and he taps into his bad side.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift — His bad voice takes control and forces him to fail.
INT. VISITATION ROOM – DAY
TE 6: After his friend dies (by suicide or homicide), he discovers that prison staff (i.e. Guards and the Warden) are purposefully putting his life at risk and covering up other crimes/inhumane treatment of inmates.
Antagonist Beat #6: Manipulates the mental health and prison staff to stay in the mental health dorm when others point out that he may not be mentally ill. Bribes others.
INT. THERAPIST’S OFFICE – DAY
TE 7: Wilbert has a breakthrough in therapy that helps him discover why he is the way he is — he’s too nice. This is the information he needs for his internal transformation. He learns that he developed a reactionary set of coping mechanisms from loss that no longer suit him.
PLACEHOLDER: He discovers that acknowledging one’s own pain, instead of being in denial, and “getting real” is the only way he will ever be able to defeat the Antagonist.
INT. CELBBLOCK – DAY
TE 8: Wilbert verbally calls out the Antagonist in front of the whole cellblock. With more than half of the inmates in the dorm on Wilbert’s side, Wilbert spells out and challenges all of the Antagonists warped ways of thinking and behaviors. The Antagonist challenges Wilbert to a fight to the death.
ACT 4:
CLIMAX: Wilbert fights the Antagonist in mortal combat and beats the Antagonist. He realizes that somewhere in the middle, between overly positive voices and bad voices, is where he should be. He spares the Antagonist’s life. He exposes the corrupt prison system and makes the corruption public (through either a counselor or another outside source).
INT. PRISON YARD – NIGHT
RESOLUTION: Wilbert wins his freedom and does a press conference. With his new found confidence, is able to confront his ex-wife, win his children back, and take control of his life in a real and meaningful way. He starts an organization to help incarcerated inmate with mental health disorders.
EXT. PRISON GROOUNDS – DAY
Wilbert tells his story to the news.
INT. COURT – DAY
Wilbert is granted a divorce and keeps his house. He is granted half-custody of his two children.
INT. OFFICE – DAY
Wilbert opens his office and welcomes his new employees; ex-inmates with mental health disorders.
-
Alice’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
INT. SUPERMARKET – DAY
Lisbeth after shopping. Elevator doors slide aside.
Apples from huge package she holds fall down and roll over when she sees Mary Paul outside.
Her old lesbian friend holds her baby boy.
INT. ELIZABETH’S APPARTMENT – DAY
Mary Paul exchanges her baby.
MARY PAUL
Do you like him?
Elizabeth looks at baby boy.
ELIZABETH
When they are little, that’s not yet clear.
MARY PAUL
You cold have baby also.
Elizabeth benevolently watches Mary Paul.
ELIZABETH
You already did that for me!
Now they stay together. Elizabeth moves out.
INT. ELIZABETH’S KITCHEN – DAY
Lisbeth gets to refrigerator, pulls out pizza and carton of milk. It’s empty!
INT. ELIZABETH’S APPARTMENT, ENTRANCE – DAY
Elizabeth gets into jacket and hat. Drops look in direction of Guest Room where Mary Paul is. Puts alarm system off.
EXT. CONVENIENCE STORE – DAY
Elizabeth with milk carton behind customer at the counter.
Her image as shot on security camera.
EXT. OUTSIDE CONVENIENCE STORE – DAY
Elizabeth gets newspaper. Bills and coins.
INT. ELIZABETH’S APPARTMENT – DAY
Elizabeth gets in.
GUEST ROOM
She starts at the picture.
Mary Paul, dead in blood on the floor, as is her baby at the table. Knifed down.
Elizabeth pulls out mobile and documents it on video.
INT. POLICE STATION – EVENING
First policemen dials it.
FIRST POLICEMAN
We contact you on behalf of your daughter, Mary Paul. She and her baby were found dead at the apartment of her friend Elizabeth Salander!
On that line noise and cries starts.
MARY PAUL’S MOTHER
We were afraid she would do that!
FIRST POLICEMAN
Elizabeth?
MARY PAUL’S MOTHER
No, Mary! She was so sad from once she got pregnant.
Second policeman, browsing comp.
SECOND POLICEMAN
Look at that!
First one, holding cell, glances to the screen.
Both exchange looks.
FIRST POLICEMAN
We have to let her go!
INT. POLICE STATION. INVESTIGATION ROOM – NIGHT
Police officer enters.
Elizabeth, depressed, on the bench.
He sits across her. Puts on the table her stuff, keys and mobile.
Elizabeth looks at him in surprise.
ELIZABETH
You let me go?
Police officer folds his arms and leans ahead.
POLICE OFFICER
Your friend Mary Paul killed her baby and suicide. We pulled out her records. She was suffering from long term instability, and was to therapist all the time.
Elizabeth keeps listening with growing disbelieve.
POLICE OFFICER
When you left apartment, you disconnected security alarm.
ELIZABETH
Yes, because she was inside!
POLICE OFFICER
She put it on. It gives us video of the empty landing here.
He turns screen on Elizabeth.
POLICE OFFICER
4:47 and at that time you was filmed on the cameras at convenience store!
Satisfied, policeman looks back at her.
POLICE OFFICER
She also put voice recording on her phone! Please, listen.
He turns on recording.
On it baby’s winning and Mary Paul’s steps. She approaches. Baby stops crying at sudden. Sound of body falling down.
POLICE OFFICER
That’s not all! Keep listening.
Entrance door slams, distant. New steps.
POLICE OFFICER
That’s you come back, and starts filming video. Moment of filming coincides with time of the recording!
Police Officer with deserved pride glances at her.
-
Rita’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment:
It’s kind of ridiculous to continue to think this will be hard. The scenes flow, whether or not they’re any good at this point.
INT. ABERNATHY’S OFFICE – DAY
Plan in action
BEGINNING: Dawn signs a contract with Abernathy Builders
MIDDLE: A lot of trust and responsibility in now on her ramshackle crew.
Abernathy’s attraction to Dawn makes him ignore his concern about what he sees in the crew.
EXT. ABERNATHY CUSTOMER’S HOUSE – DAY
BEGINNING: The emotional fragility of the crew goes into full gear.
MIDDLE: Major breakdown. None of Dawn’s psychology knowledge works. (theme — she’s gotta ditch everything she’s been taught)
END: Everybody but Zak walks off the job.
———————————-
INT. ABERNATHY BUILDERS OFFICE – DAY
Tom’s desk holds mounds of papers. Thick contracts. Rolls and rolls of architectural drawings stand on end in the corner.
Dawn reads through every word of a multipage contract while Tom waits. He pretends to be involved in what’s on his computer but sideways glances at her.
TOM
You only have to read the list of requirements, you know. The stuff that’s in your bid, like we discussed.
DAWN
It seems like Abernathy’s covered and it’s all in your favor. What if you fall short? Is that in here too?
Tom looks at her straight on. Are we talking about painting?
TOM
If I fall short? We’re testing you out before we decide on the bigger, apartment job.
Dawn puts the papers in her lap. Also looks right at him.
DAWN
Yeah, are you, I mean is Abernathy so beyond reproach? There’s no chance of any calamity in the Abernathy world?
Tom leans back and crosses his arms.
TOM
If it does, I’ll take care of it and you’ll never even know about it.
Dawn mirrors his gesture.
DAWN
That doesn’t sound very transparent.
TOM
Ask around. Nothing to hide here.
Dawn unfolds her arms for effect, lays the papers on his desk.
DAWN
Oh really? Your body language says, closed book if ever there was one.
Tom, now self-conscious, unfolds his arms and stands. He snatches at the contract.
Dawn slams her palm down on the pile of papers.
He tugs.
She stands to put more weight on them.
TOM
Maybe Abernathy and Blue Dawn are not a good fit.
DAWN
I didn’t say that.
TOM
Are you signing or not?
DAWN
I can’t sign if you don’t let loose.
Tom releases his grip.
Dawn flips to the last page and scribbles her signature. Thrusts the whole wad back at him.
He gathers them and gently lays them back in front of her. Now the epitome of rational behavior.
TOM
And initial each page, please.
Dawn, scratches the bottom corner of each page, keeps her full irritated, defiant scowl focused on Tom.
Practically throws the contract at him.
He holds his hand out for a shake to open are but…
She leaves without seeing it.
TOM
(calls after her)
Thank you.
Not at all appreciative.
DAWN
Done!
TOM
Only just started, I’m afraid.
Tom plops back in his office chair. Tips too far back. His feet hit a pile of papers and send them flying.
He grabs the table behind him, flips the printer tray into the air, busting the brackets. Blank papers float to the floor.
TOM
(mimics Dawn)
“That doesn’t sound very transparent.”He sighs and takes care of the calamity which was his office.
EXT. ABERNATHY PROJECT – MORNING
Dawn arrives on site. It’s a big house with new additions. Deck, multiple levels.
The crew is already there. Tom and Zak circle the house, making a plan of attack.
The others look ragged. Some aren’t wearing their company T’s. They drag ladders and tools through the dirt.
Except Billie, of course. She outdoes everybody. Always.
TOM
(to Dawn)
Glad you could make it. Zak’s got the low-down.
He walks off, leaving Dawn before even a handshake.
ZAK
Whoa. Cold. Do we need couple’s counseling already?
DAWN
Never mind him, what going on with these guys?
ZAK
They’re still in training. Serious manual labor is kind of a shock. Except for Billie, of course.
Billie trots by curling two five-gallon buckets all the way.
DAWN
Maybe it’s time for a group chat.
ZAK
Um, I don’t think —
DAWN
Round ’em up.
Zak calls everyone into a huddle by the van.
ZAK
So, this job is kind of important to Ms Dawn.
Dawn gives a look and steps in front of him.
DAWN
You all are important to me. What’s going on with this hang-dog look?
CRATER
What dog?
BILLIE
Fang dog? They have a dog?
She looks fragile for the first time, actually shrinks a little.
TODD
Wang dog. Who told you my nickname?They all chuckle.
HAROLD
Hang-dog. She means we are a sorry excuse, boys.
(a gallant bow)
And Miss Billie.
BILLIE
Jesus. Just get over it already.
BILLIE
I’m a bigger man than all y’all put together.
(grabs her crotch)Fang Hanging Wang Dog dog right here, losers. I’m sick of this ‘missy’ shit.
She loads her tool bag with a vengeance.
CRATER
You gonna let her talk to us like that, Boss Boy?
DAWN
Let’s all just take a breath.
She inhales, so as to demonstrate.
Crater lights a cigarette. He does inhale, though. And exhales in her face.
Dawn coughs. Waves the smoke away.
HAROLD
I do have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon. Could you give me a ride later?DAWN
What, exactly, is the problem. Let’s clear the air.
Zak’s eyes widen.
ZAK
How about we just–
CRATER
Yeah, let’s clear the air.
(blows more smoke)When do we get paid? We’re workin’ our asses off.
DAWN
As agreed, we’re on a two-week pay cycle so–
TODD
My bills are due now, they’ve done ovulated and are ready to hemorrhage unless they get fertilized fast.HAROLD
An interesting analogy, but I have to agree with young Henny Youngman here.
Todd, the tallest of the crew, towers over Super-dork.
TODD
What the fuck? Is that a dig, man?
(to Dawn)
Not only that, I should be gettin’ paid for the entertainment I provide. Even the Missus at the other house was laughing every day. I brighten this enterprise more than the paint!CRATER
If he gets a raise, then so do I!
DAWN
Nobody’s getting a raise!
This blows everybody’s lids.
Zak rubs his face, fallout expected.
CRATER
Fuck this shit.
Todd drops his brush as if it’s a mic.
Then picks it up, because it’s his brush.
DAWN
What is happening! This can’t be happening! Abernathy is going to —Billie, Crater and Todd form the most sorry-assed parade ever assembled on a sidewalk.
HAROLD
Um, leave our checks at the paint store, I guess?He runs after his not-friends to be the caboose to their pitiful procession.
DAWN
Do something, Boss Boy!Zak reaches into the van. Hands Dawn a brush and a gallon of trim paint.
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Margaret’s Act 2 middle scenes
What I learned completing this assignment is I’ve stuck to it and just kept writing despite some problems that needed solved. I kept at it and feel like I’m really building momentum now.
Because I’m doing a TV Series the reaction to Act I turning point was act 5 and these scenes start my episode II Anger.
INT. house for sale – Olive Court – day
Lake sleeps peacefully in the stager bedroom of the house for sale.
She smiles in her sleep.
Blake appears on the side of the bed.
BlAKE
Time to get up babe.
Lake’s smile disappears.
Lake
No. Not your baby.
EXT. HOUSE FOR SALE – OLIVE COURT – day
Two cars pull up (describe).
Ember and client approach the front door.
INT. house for sale – Olive Court – day
Ember describes the kitchen getting couple to imagine this as their home.
INT. house for sale – Olive Court – day
Lake hears someone. Jumps out of bed and slides her bags under the bed.
Straightens the covers and jumps under the bed just in time.
Ember in room. Legs and voices.
INT. BEE’S ORGANIC FAST FOOD RESTAURANT – DAY
Lake enters Bee’s her bag over her shoulder and keys and phone in hand.
She walks up to the counter. There is a young woman, COUNTER HELP, smiling ready to help. Lake looks disappointed.
LAKE
Hi, I’m picking up for Annie L. today.
COUNTER HELP
Just a minute.
Counter Help begins looking through the various bags on the pick up shelf.
Mitch appears and speaks to the young woman who disappears to the back.
MITCH
That’s Annie L?
LAKE
Yes, thank you.
MITCH
So, woman about to formerly be known as Lake, what goes on?
LAKE
Oh, you know, brain surgery. You?
MITCH
About the same.
He hands her a bag.
LAKE
Thank you.
He walks around the corner and begins to walk her out.
MITCH
May I walk with you?
Mitch motions towards the door.
LAKE
But of course.
The STAFF at Bee’s watch the two eagerly as they exit the restaurant.
EXT. RESTAURANT – DAY
Mitch and Lake are at her car, the food already in the hatch.
LAKE
You didn’t call?
MITCH
I was embarrassed. It felt…you know…too casual.
LAKE
Hey.
Lake reaches up and kisses him on his cheek.
LAKE
It may have seemed casual but truth be told I haven’t slept with anyone since Blake…
Mitch
Break up?
Lake
My husband. He died in the firestorm.
MITCH
Oh. Ummm, you want to talk about it?
LAKE
Noooo. Definitely, no.
MITCH
You should have told me.
LAKE
I was nervous, ya know. I thought just pull it off like a bandaid.
MITCH
You’re so romantic.
LAKE
I know, right.
MITCH
Second date?
Blake shows up.
LAKE
Not you again.
Mitch
I’m getting mixed signals here.
LAKE
Sorry, I’m definitely down for that second date. Do you ever feel like you’re being haunted by your ex?
Mitch
All the time. I get maybe we should take it a little slower. How about dinner at my place?
LAKE
I’d like that. Now I have to deliver this food before it gets cold and take care of something I’ve been putting off for a very long time.
He opens the car door for her as she steps into the driver’s seat. He closes the door for her after she gets in.
He waves and she smiles at him as she pulls out of the parking lot in her yellow and black Mini Cooper.
-
Alex’ Key Scenes 2 and 3
What I learned is… thanks to # in notes… finally being able to find my stuff!
I have a tendency to forget where I put stuff… and I’ll have a faint memory of an earlier draft that had a great plot point or passage (not even wordsmithing or anything minor like that mind you!)… which always made me loose my s*** trying to find it again.
This is probably the first time I can actually finish a ScreenwritingU class with an actual result I love…
Key Scene 2: Protagonist makes a plan and executes it. (14.2.)
After trying to silence Bernhard, she decides to play along.
They define ground rules.
(GENRE RULES? He will stop talking to her when he is in prison).
Oona starts seeing 2024 through the eyes of Bernhard, rewarding her with a new paradigm of reality.
She is never alone again! (Does that bug her?)
Bernhard convinces Oona he means no harm. For now.
PLACE HOLDER – MODERN WORLD MONTAGE
Philosophical FUN AND GAMES explaining 2024 to an alien from 1850. Excess, Opulence, Porn,
MIGROS
ATM
CARS
MOVIES
EMAIL
EMAIL SCAMS Prince gives you millions.
PLACE HOLDER
Bernhard’s comments sharpens Oona’s senses, gives her ideas for Insta posts.
VIRAL TWEETS, 10k Followers
INT. SCHOOL – PLACEHOLDER NEW TALENTS
Oona aces a history test.
EXT. LENZBURG – DAY PARADIGM SHIFT
Oona explains and re-discovers Lenzburg 2024 with Bernhard.
She is the healthiest she has ever been.
Does an Insta Series: Cos play DAUGHTER OF THE REVOLUTION… WHERE DID WE GO WRONG?
Her comments on Lenzburg 1850-2024 are benign philosophy, economics, social responsibility… not yet activism.
She has cultural followers… people that are interested in museums, history, taking tours.
INT. MAYOR OFFICE LENZBURG – DAY
Waves of tourists arrive from out of town Switzerland… even Austria and Germany… the US…
She becomes Nr 1 on Trip Advisor and Travel Channels
Tourists are flooding the town. Hotels have no room.
INT. SCHOOL – PLACEHOLDER NEW TALENTS
Hot teacher wants her to write a book. Introduces her to a journalist friend of his.
Rosemary is jealous.
Oona has been spending less time with her, has excuses for being busy.
Rosemary stalks Oona and learns Oona is posting as Bernhard. (R-Mary does not follow travel channels after all, ha)
PLACEHOLDER – HER DMs START BLOWING UP
Local Journalist hound her on DM, want interviews, Podcasts invite her, Radio stations (… she considers doing one if she does not have to show her face?)
Is getting IMPOSTER SYNDROM
She is being offered products to promote and endorse.
PLACEHOLDER
Rosemary goes to tabloids and breaks the Influencer is a young local woman.
PLACE HOLDER – TROUBLE IN PARADISE
Peace does not last.
Bernhard is getting riled up with all the ‘look don’t touch’.
He wants to go to the fancy places, wants to experience The Big Life.
With all this insane wealth and opulence, why doesn’t Oona get hers?
Why was he born in a destitute time. Why can’t he come to 2024… Oona came to 1850 after all.
He tries to influence Oona to take bigger risks / think criminal thoughts.
Tries to get her to be more like Rosemary the Gangster Moll. Shames Oona?
They start fighting a lot (schizophrenic yelling to herself on the street)
PLACE HOLDER
Oona thinks maybe she can help Bernhard/shut him up and takes him to her mother’s AA meeting.
So far Bernhard has only seen Barbara through the eyes of her avoidant daughter.
INT. AA MEETING – DAY
Bernhard falls in love with Barbara, the Delinquent Savior… and becomes obsessed she could repair him.
Barbara2024 reminds him of Barbara1850 and all he has lost.
He begs Oona to tell her mother about him so they can take a meeting.
Oona refuses to admit to her mom she is a full blown (but happy) schizophrenic.
PLACE HOLDER
Oona and Rosemary have a falling out about how to use POWER – what to post.
The essence of Bernhard is BEING BAD and HAVING FUN.
Rosemary wants to do Crime Stories… and commit new crimes… how fun would that be.
Key Scene 3: Not only does their plan fail, but…
PLACE HOLDER – IN THE MEANTIME IN 1850
Influenced by the luxury to be had in 2024, Dark Bernhard rises again.
Commits a crime. (Is this the whole SMUGGLER PHASE???)
Plans to escape Aargau for the US.
Tries to get Barbara and his young daughter to go with him. She refuses. It’s too late. She no longer believes him. And has been in jail twice because of him. And she is seeing someone else.
Bernhard begs his father for the money to go to the US (in real life he started smuggling… dunno if there is room for that)
Ready to board ship in Le Havre.
But doesn’t pass the health test – idiot slept with prostitutes on the trip through Paris and gotten a venereal disease.
And idiot that he is he goes home.
PLACE HOLDER
Pressured by Rosemary, Oona accepts endorsements for free swag.
Her whole apartment is filled with boxes. Barbara wants to know WTF is going on.
She confronts Rosemary and agrees to protest something and rally followers.
If anything, they should use the power for good.
Oona has ‘a seance’ with Bernhard in front of Rosemary.
They get along thick as thieves!
Rosemary jests how fun it would be to sneak into the JVA.
PLACE HOLDER
They liberate a pig farm.
PLACE HOLDER
Rob something, steal Blocher’s paintings
BENIGN HEIST
PLACE HOLDER 1850
Bernhard is captured (because he is occupied too much in 2024?) and goes to jail.
PLACE HOLDER
In the middle of the HEIST Oona freaks out because she can no longer hear Bernhard… because he is in jail.
Does she tell Rosemary?
They have a really close call with the police.
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Jane’s Act 2: Middle Scenes
By doing this assignment I discovered that Chelsea really doesn’t have a plan. The only focus she has is finding Julie because she believes Julie is in danger. Again, in keeping with the “just write” mantra, I put down some scene ideas that can move us to the Mid-Point, which is where Chelsea finally understands that Julie has set her up to die as “Julie.” What I’ve written is all over the place but in it are the bones of something that might work!
INT. JULIE’S ROOM
Chelsea goes to Julie’s room searching for Julie. She can’t make sense of any of this. She gets back into her own clothes.FLASHBACK
Chelsea remembers how her and Julie used to leave each other secret messages in a specific way. (Come back to this with a clever idea).INT. JULIE’S ROOM
Chelsea leaves Julie a message asking for help. She tells her what the Greek guy said. Help!!!! She looks for her clothes that she left in Julie’s room. They’re gone.INT. HALL
Chelsea sneaks along the hall back to her room. On her way she sees a dozen police in the reception area. She overhears that the police are not letting anyone off the ship or on to the ship. It will remain in place until the killers are caught.INT. CHELSEA’S ROOM
Chelsea makes it back to her room. She goes to change her clothes. She tries to barricade herself in her room. In her closet she finds Keith’s dead body. She panics.INT. HALL
Chelsea sneaks back to Julie’s room. She sees the police swarming in and out of a room near Julie’s. From what she can hear, Julie’s parent’s friend Archie Cross has been found dead in his room.INT. JULIE’S ROOM
Chelsea enters to find one of the goons waiting for her. He tells her the boss will be happy she’s cooperating. He tells her to give it to him. She tells him she has no idea what he’s talking about.He threatens her. She tells him if anything happens to her no one will get it. (she still doesn’t know what “it” is). She tells him it’s just between her and the Greek guy.
The other goon comes in and tells the other one leave her alone. They leave.
Chelsea breaks down. She has no idea what to do. She is terrified for herself but also for Julie. If no one can leave the ship, is Julie there and hiding.
She searches Julie’s room to see if she can find a clue. This brings back memories.
FLASHBACK
Chelsea and Julie are older now. Julie and Chelsea impersonate each other in school. They laugh at how easy it is to trick their teachers.INT. JULIE’S ROOM
Chelsea finds something in Julie’s room that leads her to Archie Cross.INT. GOON’S ROOM
Chelsea returns unseen and tells the goons she needs the computer. They don’t trust her. She tells them they can see what she is looking at.Chelsea googles Archie Cross. He’s very rich and deals in gems. He is the owner of the Blue Lotus, a rare blue diamond that is worth millions.
One of the goons makes a comment that lets Chelsea know that the Blue Lotus is what she is looking for.
INT. HALL
Chelsea tries to enter her room but finds that it is a crime scene. She overhears that detectives talking about her. They assume that she is dead but there is evidence in her room that ties her to Cross’s murder and the stolen Blue Lotus.INT. JULIE’S ROOM
Julie’s room has been searched. Chelsea goes to the hiding place where she left a note for Julie. The note is still there. Is Julie dead? Where is she?FLASHBACK
Chelsea and Julie pretend to shoplift stuff in a store. They put it all back as it is a lark. Later in Julie’s room, Chelsea finds some of the stuff that they picked up but that Julie was supposed to put back.INT. JULIE’S ROOM
Chelsea thinks back to other secret places that she remembers Julie hiding things. She searches and finds X (figure this out).INT. HALL
Chelsea steals a maid’s uniform and a vacuum and heads to the office where the detectives have set up their headquarters.INT. OFFICE
Detectives go over evidence that links Chelsea to a Greek gang and that she is the killer and has the Blue Lotus. They plan to do a room by room search until they find her.INT. HALL
Chelsea’s phone rings. All eyes look at her. She quickly turns on the vacuum and walks away as she answers the phone. It is the Greek guy. How did he get her number? The number is no different. And, the goons aren’t picking up their line. He hopes nothing has happened to them.She tells him that she knows he’s after the Blue Lotus but she is not Julie and she doesn’t know where it is. He tells her that the owner is dead. His men didn’t kill him. So she must have.
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Lonnie’s ACT II Middle Scenes
What I learned from this assignment: Mostly how to set up the protagonist actions to fail, setting up the T.P. for Act II.
Chuck walks over to A POLICEMAN (40ish) patrolling and helping with the clean-up.
Key scene #2:
CHUCK
Officer, I’d like to report an incident last night, actually two I overheard that might be of concern.
POLICEMAN
(reluctant)
OK, what do you have?
CHUCK
There was this weird guy in an orange jacket over there at that outside pay phone. He was telling someone…very serioius conversation… that “things were heating up”, and, “Guard isn’t here yet”, and then he pulled out a revolver and checked the chambers. It was loaded.
The policeman did not seem at all surprised, but pulled out a small notebook, took a few notes.
POLICEMAN
OK, son, we’ll look into it.
CHUCK
That’s it? Want me to go to the station and report this?
POLICEMAN
No, I got this. Much appreciated.
CHUCK
Oh yeah, I over another student say they were burning down the ROTC building tonight
POLICEMAN
Oh, yeah, we hear that all the time.
He looks around. Sees a traffic jam.
POLICEMAN
You take care. I’ve gotta get this car moving up.
Chuck walks back over to Karen, who’s sweeping more glass on the sidewalk.
KAREN
What’d he say?
CHUCK
He didn’t seem concerned at all. I’m floored.
KAREN
Sweetie, you might need to go to the station and report this stuff.
CHUCK
I think I’ll track this guy myself. There’s something strange about this, because the cop acted like he knew this weird guy with the gun.
Chuck bends over with a large dust pan and helps Karen with some more broken glass.
Key Scene #3:
Chuck goes to Mayor’s office, warns about the ROTC bldg burning that night. They are disinterested. Chuck is deflated. He realizes the authorities won’t take his warning seriously. Is there a plan to burn down the ROTC building? A nefarious plan?
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KAREN SINCLAIR’S ACT 2 MIDDLE SCENES
What I learned doing this assignment is…?
What I learned doing this assignment is just to keep going.
ASSIGNMENT 14
Concept
Ad Exec Sadie Hilliard goes out for a noontime run to get in the right state of mind to make a presentation to her agency’s most significant client. While running, she receives a call on her cellphone threatening the lives of her and her family if she should stop running.
Theme
Sadie has never had to think about anyone but herself. Because of that, she places very little value on relationships and family. She is confident as it relates to her skills in her career but insecure as a partner and family member. Can the right person make the difference in her life or is she destined to be a loner.
Act 1
Inciting Incident
In New York City, Sadie breaks up with her longtime boyfriend. It has been a long time coming. She accepts a proposal from her company’s CEO that she move to Vancouver, BC, and establish a branch of the advertising agency. A partnership could be in the offering if she is successful in Vancouver.
Turning Point
Sadie settles into her new work life in Vancouver, and she meets the love of her life. She goes out for an afternoon run immediately preceding a major presentation and is taken hostage by a caller using her cellphone.
Act 2
Reaction to the Turning Point in Act 1 (Key Scene 1)
Sadie is trapped but knows she must do something. She makes several obvious attempts to test the caller and see how trapped she really might be. Everything is up to her. Her old ways have her needing to figure this all out to free herself.
EXT. STREETS – DAY
Sadie keeps running. She decides she must do something.
EXT. STREETS – DAY
BEGINNING: Sadie keeps running but realizes she must do something. She decides to test the caller by jumping up onto the sidewalk and running among walkers.
MIDDLE: Sadie receives no reaction to her jump to the sidewalk. She slows to a walk.
END: Her phone vibrates with a text, RUN!
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DAY (MOMENTS LATER)
Sadie sprints full out. When she crosses at the intersection she doesn’t see the motor bike.
EXT. STREETS – DAY (MOMENTS LATER)
BEGINNING: Sadie starts to sprint, all out for a block.
MIDDLE: Just as she arrives at the intersection the light turns green. She crosses the street looking to the right and doesn’t see the motorcycle.
END: She thinks she may be in the clear, so she slows to a walk again.
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DAY (CONTINUOUS)
As Sadie walks she dials 911 on her cellphone.
EXT. STREETS – DAY (CONTINUOUS)
BEGINNING: While walking, Sadie dials 911 on her cellphone.
MIDDLE: Her cellphone makes a funny sounds. A digitally enhanced voice chimes in…
END: NICE TRY!
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DAY (CONTINUOUS)
Sadie starts to run again. She tries unsuccessfully to engage a couple pushing a baby carriage to help her.
EXT. STREETS – DAY (CONTINUOUS)
BEGINNING: Sadie starts to run again.
MIDDLE: She runs up beside a couple pushing a baby carriage. She is out of breath from her earlier sprint but tries to tell them that she is being held hostage and implores them to call the police.
END: The couple looks around, over their shoulder, to see who Sadie is talking to. When they realize it is them, they suddenly turn right, around a corner, without saying a word.
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DAY (CONTINUOUS)
Sadie calls after the couple. They don’t look back. The caller texts her again and attaches two short video clips of her stepchildren and her husband.
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EXT. STREETS – DAY (CONTINUOUS)
BEGINNING: As the couple moves away from her, they head right, straight toward the caller on the motorcycle with the flashlight. Sadie yells at the couple. They ignore her and speed up.
MIDDLE: The caller turns the flashlight off before the couple has a chance to notice them.
END: Shortly thereafter, Sadie receives a text. It includes a short video of her stepchildren playing at the park with them mother, followed by a video of Adam walking back from the mailbox to their house.
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DUSK (LATER)
Sadie continues running. It starts to rain. She looks to her right at every intersection. The person on the motorbike is still tracking her and shining a flashlight at her to let her know they are there.
EXT. STREETS – DUSK (LATER)
BEGINNING: Sadie continues running. It starts to rain.
MIDDLE: She looks to her right at every intersection and sees the person on the motorcycle still tracking her.
END: The flashlight continues to shine in her direction. The rain makes the light look more sinister.
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DUSK
Sadie has been running for over two hours and needs to urinate. She has been holding it for a while.
EXT. STREETS – DUSK
BEGINNING: Sadie has been running for over two hours. She starts to squirm as now she really needs to urinate. It is raining which gives her cover to just let the urine flow. She is already wet from head to toe.
MIDDLE: The urine runs down her legs and into her new shoes. Sadie is in agony as it hits a blister that has formed and popped.
END: Sadie clenches her teeth as she runs. She looks down. The inside of the left toe of her shoe is turning red with blood.
———————————————————————————
EXT. STREETS – DUSK (LATER)
It is an hour later, starting to get dark and the rain is really coming down. Sadie’s bangs are flat against her forehead, her ponytail has fallen, and her feet are bloody. She is a mess. Sadie decides to flag down a car. Her attempt is thwarted when a motorcycle pulls up behind her and revs its motor.
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EXT. STREETS – DUSK (LATER)
BEGINNING: It is an hour later, starting to get dark and the rain is pounding down. Sadie’s bangs are flat against her forehead, her ponytail has fallen, and her feet are bloody. She is a mess. The sidewalks are deserted. She gets strange looks from cars coming up beside her.
MIDDLE: A car pulls up beside Sadie and they start to roll down the passenger window. Just as Sadie is about to engage them, a motorcycle pulls up behind her and revs its engine.
END: She blows them off, they roll up the window and continue. The motorcycle passes her and speeds off. She realizes that they probably weren’t the caller but just an impatient motorcyclist trying to get home and out of the rain. She continues running around and through puddles.
———————————————————————————
INT. AGENCY BULLPEN
Back at the office, Sadie’s team is concerned. They have everything ready and loaded in the van. The only thing missing is Sadie. They try to call her, but her phone goes direct to voice mail. They decide to head over to the client’s office and set up.
INT. AGENCY BULLPEN
BEGINNING: Sadie’s team has everything loaded into their van. They are standing in a huddle discussing what they should do about their missing boss.
MIDDLE: Randy assures the group that Sadie will be there as he is dialing her cellphone. The call goes directly to voice mail. Randy leaves a message telling Sadie that he and the others are taking everything to the client’s office to set up and be ready when she gets there.
END: The gang picks up their purses and jackets and heads to the van. Randy tells everyone, as they are walking out, not to say anything to the client about Sadie’s whereabouts. He is sure she will show up.
———————————————————————————
Protagonist Takes on A Plan and Executes It (Key Scene 2)
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
Sadie looks at the time on her phone and realizes she is going to miss her presentation. She sees no evidence that anyone has tried to get in contact with her.
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
BEGINNING: Sadie checks the time on her phone realizing she is going to miss her presentation. She decides she needs to contact the caller and negotiate her freedom. The rain is making it difficult for her fingers to text. She flips over to her recent phone calls and sees a number that she doesn’t recognize.
MIDDLE: Sadie hits the number. It starts to ring but goes directly to a voice mail with a standard response instructing her to leave a message. She leaves a message threatening that she is just about to call the caller’s bluff and stop running.
END: She puts her phone back in her leg pocket and keeps running.
———————————————————————————
EXT. VAN – NIGHT
Randy decides to drive the van over to where he knows Sadie likes to go for a short run. He wonders if maybe she is injured or something.
EXT. VAN – NIGHT
BEGINNING: Randy takes a sudden turn with the van, deciding to quickly drive the route he knows Sadie takes when she’s going on a short run.
MIDDLE: The gang asks him what he’s doing, and he lies saying that he saw an alert on his phone about a roadblock. He drives the path and then cuts back to the main route.
END: Sadie is no where to be seen on this short route. She has been running for over three hours.
———————————————————————————
Not Only Does Their Plan Fail But… (Key Scene 3)
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
Hearing nothing back from the caller, Sadie feels desperate. She decides she is going to jump in a cab, borrow the cabbie’s phone and call the police. Her plan backfires and she gets booted from the cab.
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
BEGINNING: Receiving no response to her message to the caller, and feeling desperate, Sadie decides she must do something. She sees a cab coming up beside her. As it passes, she speeds up, bangs on the window and when the cab slows, she opens the door and jumps in the back seat with a couple who are dressed to the nines and heading for a night out on the town.
MIDDLE: The couple recoils at Sadie’s condition. Her phones starts to emit an ear-piercing sound that she can’t stop. She fumbles with her phone and drops it on the floor. While she is bent over retrieving it, the cabbie stops the cab, jumps out and runs around to the back passenger door. He pulls Sadie out and slams the door, runs back around, jumps in, and takes off.
END: Sadie crumbles to the ground with her cellphone in her hand. It vibrates. She takes the call and a digital voice yells, STAND UP AND RUN!
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EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
Sadie drags herself up onto her feet. She slowly moves from a trudging walk to a bent-over, slow foot-dragging jog to an upright jog.
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
BEGINNING: Sadie drags herself onto her hands and knees. She grabs a tree and pulls herself up onto her feet.
MIDDLE: Sadie puts one soggy foot in front of another as she moves from a bent-over, slow foot-dragging jog to an upright jog.
END: She resigns herself to the fact that she will miss her presentation. And she knows that no one will believe her, ‘the dog ate my homework’ story.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by Karen Sinclair.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by Karen Sinclair.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by
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Tita’s Act II Middle Scenes (Assignment 14)
What I learned from this Assignment:
Ways to take a breath and stop fighting the process so I can use the model to learn this way to “git ‘er done” fast – specially when:
· I’ve copied the info needed for each step in the assignment so I remember details of this model but everything seems out of order or mixed up or overwhelming or over intellectualized… Breathe.
· I’m putting the elements of the assignment in sequence along with SU notes about the steps so I stay aligned with Hal’s guidelines. Breathe.
· These daily challenges feel overwhelming and exhausting – specially in addition to ongoing life challenges. So I force myself through the steps of this next section of the SU “git ‘er done” model
· I despair of my messy pieces of thoughts, disorganization of files even with the clear SU outline and fear that after putting this and other plays on hold while I was main financial and parenting support for my children, now, when finally working part time to free up playwriting time, I may have dementia. Breathe.
· I can’t bear the thought of writing what I outlined, I can copy/paste the outline and almost mechanically turn it into dialog and directions… and revise/make it better later. At least I’ll have a draft to work with rather than nothing but thoughts and wishes.
· I need to find a minute-by-minute strategy for balancing:
o meticulous rigid left brain focus on following SU “rules” without letting myself whine or rebel
with
o creatively sensual right brain ease as I let the story in my mind flow into the elements/steps of the SU model
Breathe!
SU Strategy Reminders
Key Scene 2: Protagonist takes on a plan and executes it.
SU NOTES: The Act 1 TP occurred, locking the Hero into this journey and sending them into unknown territory. They had an instant reaction being put in that uncomfortable position. But they have a plan — that represents their Old Ways.
Remember, all it takes to challenge the Old Ways is to simply have them fail. You don’t need to have the characters lecture them or directly spell out their Old Ways in dialogue. Just have them rely on their normal solutions and see what happens in the next scene.
Key Scene 3: Not only does their plan fail, but…
Those Old Ways are challenged from lightly to heavily — and they no don’t work…The Protagonist’s plan, once executed, comes short of success. Not only that, but it also sets up or supports the Midpoint where everything changes.
With the failure of this first plan, the flaws in the Old Ways show up. The plan failed, often leaving this character in a helpless position, but it isn’t over. It is about to get worse in the Midpoint scene. For now, just dramatize the downfall of the plan in a fun way. Remember, all it takes to challenge the Old Ways is to simply have them not work. You don’t need to have the characters lecture them or directly spell out their Old Ways in dialogue. For now, just create a list of attempts to solve the problem or to make themselves feel better… then have those actions fail or make things worse.
BEAT SHEET for Act II Key Middle Scenes 2 and 3
The Plan (Key Scene II.2) – Hutchinson is shocked by an anti-tax demonstration but insists to raging Judge Oliver and Tax Commissioner why he will allow it (despite the effigy being his cousin and then burning stamps.)
o TE2 H becomes aware that they look rebellious but maybe have real concerns not just out to destroy society
o Theme Exploring – How people who want freedom/rights can protest without violence
o Old Ways – explain and enforce law
· The Next Plan (Key Scene II.3) Hutchinson hears that radical leaders are using the demonstration to unite the colonies against the tax – tax commissioner wants all involved arrested. Hutchinson will write Lord XX [Find his name] that even if tax is lawful, important to listen to people – maybe just stay with tariffs on imports.
o New Ways – starting to consider listening/negotiating not just enforcing laws
o TE2, continued – H realizes they maybe have real concerns not just out to destroy society
Outline of Key Scene 2: The Plan (+ Additional/Placeholder Scenes – Protag takes on a plan and executes it)
1765
Beginning: The royal tax commissioner has hauled out Hutchinson with his slave Andrew to see a demonstration in a Boston park. Hutch is startled. Sam, Otis, others welcome him, explain the event/effigies of King Luis, Satan and new Boston Tax collector. Judge Peter Oliver insists Hutch arrest them – they have an effigy hanging on a wooden wagon commandeered by mob leaders but surrounded by merchants, shopkeepers, laborers, freed slaves, Otis’ Native American son, that is his brother Andrew, the newly appointed tax master for Massachusetts Bay Colony.
EXT. TREE OF LIBERTY IN BOSTON GREEN- NIGHT
Demonstration against Stamp Act – H sees Sam and other radicals keeping it calm. Judge Peter Oliver takes him aside, insists he call the sheriff, arrest the leaders. H refuses to arrest fellow citizens. Must demand that Parl rescind the tax.
Middle: Sam Adams, watching from shadowed sidelines, greets Hutch and others. James Otis and the two gang leaders explain the display. Hutchinson, against anger from Judge Oliver and Tax Commissioner Robinson. The demonstrators call for elected reps to make their taxes and they all set fire to paper they call the stamp tax paper…and Hutch, politely, explains why they already are taxed by their reps… and if they want to argue, at least pay taxes while they argue so they won’t give enemies an opportunity to make another war on Great Britain.
Theme Exploring – The fear felt by people who focus only on law/order with others protest, even peacefully, for their freedom/rights
End:
As people start shouting back, getting angry, Sam, charming, agrees to everyone’s shock and consternation, says all are patriotic, gets the demonstrators to take the effigies up to a hill and burn them. Hutch watches the bonfire.
Additional Scene/Placeholder:
EXT. HILL ABOVE BOSTON – CONTINUOUS TIME
Bonfire. Joyful, wild celebrating. Hutch sees Sam leading people to carry effigies to hill top. Watches from afar with spyglass. Commissioner terrified by mob. H tries to explain them – had to survive on their own. Came from poorhouses and jails of Eng….
Additional Scene/Placeholder
EXT. PORCH OF GREEN DRAGON TAVERN. TWO WEEKS LATER/AFTERNOON
Sam mobilizes merchants, workers, ministers, gang members, farmers etc. into Committee of Correspondence. Insert part of his real letter praising the bravery and patriotism of the people
Joyful celebration – Otis ecstatic – the real spirit of the people…
—
First Draft Script for Key Scene II.2 Protagonist takes on a plan and executes it.
EXT. TREE OF LIBERTY IN BOSTON GREEN- NIGHT
Following Judge Peter Oliver who rushes in pointing in rage to view the protest, Hutchinson is shocked. Tax Commissioner Robinson stays, frightened, at the back. Townspeople – merchants, shopkeepers, laborers, dockworkers, even ministers and some policemen in uniform but part of the crowd – stand around a large wagon with a glowing lantern inside a sheet painted with dancing devils – and hanging from a pole on the wagon, an effigy of a man labeled “Tax Master” and a large boot labeled “Lord Bute.”
JUDGE PETER OLIVER
Arrest them!
HUTCHINSON
For…?
JAMES OTIS
[Leaps out from crowd]
We’ll be hanging the Lords of Parliament as soon as-
SAM ADAMS
[Pulling Otis away to back]
Jemmy, keep it peaceful.
JOHN HANCOCK
[Apologetically]
But Judge Oliver, they reassured me that our Constitution gives every British citizen –
JAMES OTIS
[Breaking free and in Oliver’s face]
Anywhere! Damn right! Every citizen of Great Britain has the right to vote for our own leaders to make laws for us, tax us. Our forefathers never gave up that right by moving to the New World!
JOHN HANCOCK
They showed me the King’s charter to the first settlers of our colony. Too far to elect people for Parliament so the king gave them the right –
JAME OTIS
[Interrupting]
Right to elect our own leaders. As long as we are loyal to our monarch. By standing against the illegal Stamp Tax, we are showing our loyalty to our king and the Constitution of our nation Great Britain!
[Crowd cheers]
We got one of those boxes of Stamp Tax papers – make us prove we paid your illegal tax by stamping every purchase? People of this colony – what are we going to do with Parliament’s illegal tax on us? Hold up your stamp papers! You don’t have one? Hold up any paper you got.
[Grabs a torch, lights it from a lantern, and starts lighting stamp papers, people light each others’ paper until the circle around the wagon becomes a circle of fires]
JUDGE OLIVER
Where’s Sheriff Greenleaf?!
OTIS
[Now in Hutchinson’s face]
See? The people trust me. They know I resigned from the royal position rather than let our officers break into people’s homes.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Smugglers’ homes. And you’re inebriated.
JUDGE OLIVER
[to Robinson] That’s just what he’s like.[to Hutchinson] Lieutenant Gov – we don’t want the Commissioner reporting back that we;’re unruly savages – do something! Get the police – disburse this crowd. Arrest him arrested and I’ll jail him
[Angry roar from crowd]
HUTCHINSON
If we arrest him, this whole crowd will become enraged –
[Eying Sam Adams who is guiding Otis away again.]
– and another rabble rouser will pop up then –
SAM ADAMS
[Handing Otis over to Hancock]
Gentlemen, come see this magnificent creation the people have created – their peaceful protest against your illegal tax
[Two men rush forward, each trying to be the first to explain proudly]
HENRY SWIFT
[Dockworker pointing proudly to the boot]
I hanged Lord Bute here for telling Parliament to stick us with the Stamp Act? And –
EBENEEZER MACKINTOSH
King Louis. We sent his French troops and their Indians back into Canada. Even Satan here couldn’t help him invade our British colonies!
HENRY SWIFT
And – and we’re hanging the Tax Master – Ain’t he your cousin, Lieutenant Governor?
JAMES OTIS
See?! Anyone stealing our rights will be hanged for – Mr. Hancock, leave me be – for depriving our right as British citizens to govern and tax ourselves! Anyone! House of Lords, House of Commoners. Even royal appointees born right here in Boston!
[Crowd getting agitate]
JUDGE OLIVER
Police! We’re outnumbered? Go fast – get the Sheriff and reinforcements!
[The policemen who had been part of the crowd run off blowing their whistles to alert the Sheriff. Crowd becomes angrier]
SAM ADAMS
[To Crowd]
How can we show the good Judge Oliver and all of Lieutenant Governor’s other family and friends that we are peaceful citizens exercising our lawful right to express our concerns?
MACKINTOSH
[Jumping up to effigies on wagon]
Yeah – me and my South End boys’ll show how we’re gonna hang anyone takes away our rights!
HANCOCK
Mr. Adams, this is –
SWIFT
You’re full of it, Mackintosh – me and my North Enders’ll send their tax men back to London or down to Hell!
SAM ADAMS
[To Crowd}
A law abiding people. But we’re free to protest Parliament’s illegal tax on us. Who are we?
[Many in crowd shout “Sons of Liberty!”]
Do the Sons of Liberty have the courage and strength to cart our wagon up to the top of that hill and sacrifice our effigies for trying to take away our rights as British citizens? Mr. Mackintosh – Mr. Swift – can you and your men start the procession?
[The procession begins, taking the wagon off]
JUDGE OLIVER
[TBD – Fuming as in his book against Otis and Adams]
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Harvard graduates. Good families – why?!
JUDGE OLIVER
Jealousy. Sons of men who helped us win the war last year against the French.
HUTCHINSON
The king gave me the appointment Colonel Otis wanted – James accused me of buying his father’s position. And Samuel Adams? His father wanted us to allow farmers to set up a Land Bank -use land as currentcy. Ridiculous. Both of them loyal sons, each blaming me for the idiocy of their fathers.JUDGE OLIVER
Look!
[They see on a hill a bonfire and silhouette shadows of people dancing around it]
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Primitive savages. Why do the men of commerce join with them?
JUDGE OLIVER
Scared.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Understandable. Most from the poorhouses and prisons of the Mother Country. People back home thought the colonies were just rich farmers and shippers. I’ll tell ‘em.
HUTCHINSON
To survive in the wilderness. Often under attack by the tribes And recently by the French and the Indians. Even the wealthiest had to be tough. Parliament must rescind this Stamp Tax.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Not you, too?!
—
Additional Scene/Placeholder
EXT. PORCH OF GREEN DRAGON TAVERN. TWO WEEKS LATER/AFTERNOON
Sam mobilizes merchants, workers, ministers, gang members, farmers etc. into Committee of Correspondence to end news of the peaceful protest, pride in the people… send throughout Massachusetts and the other colonies.
[TBD Insert part of Sam’s words from his actual letter praising the bravery and patriotism of the people]
Joyful celebration – Otis ecstatic – the real spirit of the people…
—
Outline of Key Scene 3: Not Only Does the Plan Fail, but…
Old ways don’t work
Beginning:
EXT. OUTSIDE HUTCHINSON’S HOME IN BOSTON – NIGHT
Rioters loot, burn and almost kill Gov Hutchinson. H is trying to stop them by appealing to ethics and not leaving his porch… Sam is working the crowd desperately trying to break up the riot. Both fail.
Adams and wife Betsy running with Otis to Hutch mansion.., crowd shouting.. Otis says someoe got them drunk… was too good… Betsy is getting women to rush to bring their men home… Hutch with Andrew… Calling on merchants against the tax to see what illegal actions – Hutch plea – violence, throwing, fire starts, daughter and Andrew try to get Hutch away… Otis getting wilder from joiing to condemning… John Hancock terrified – stop them… house on fire. Looting, papers… Daughter and Andrew pull Hutch away…
Theme exploring – How people demanding freedom/rights without balancing with law/order can cause violence
Middle: (Next Plan)
INT. COUNCIL CHAMBERS – DAY
Apologies from many – Hancock, etc. Otis, half mad, runs in, weeping pledging loyalty and damning Sam
Theme exploring – Sometimes demands for freedom/right may sound high level but actually be based on personal greed/anger… or maybe the law/order people distort the reasons for wanting freedom/rights
Hutch decides to use the goodwill, be friend not competitor, equal not better. Judge Peter Oliver is ranting against the people. H stops Commissioner from calling troops. Decides to build consensus by discussing concerns about taxes – but as soon as Commissioner walks out secretly writes letter requesting royal army protection. Maybe because: Otis’s Tory wife apologizing for her husband, his jealous because H’s father got appointed to the job O’s father wanted. Maybe they become close,
Theme exploring – Growing awareness of a law/order person of the need to listen to needs/concerns of the people demanding freedom/order (Note – interesting to find the theme all over the place – all I changed to highlight it here is the phrase in italics)
Plan in Action
Ending:
EXT. OUTSIDE GREEN DRAGON TAVERN
Merchants, friends, avoiding Sam. Used the mobs… romanticized poor and ignorant and violent.
Inauguration party for Hutch. Outside. People going to party scoff Sam. Sam, alone except for leaders of the two mobs, says someday England will be a tiny island, the American colonies will be the new power. [TO DO: get exact quote from letter] When accused of being against King, he says he hopes under king who supports an American Parliament..
Theme exploring – Sometimes demands for freedom/right may sound high level but actually be based on personal greed/anger… or maybe the law/order people distort the reasons for wanting freedom/rights
First Draft Script for Key Scene 3: Not Only Does the Plan Fail, but…
Old ways don’t work
EXT. OUTSIDE HUTCHINSON’S HOME IN BOSTON – NIGHT
Large angry group is gathering with torches yelling at Hutchinson who is on his porch alone. His slave Andrew and his daughter Peggy come out.
HUTCHINSON
Andrew – take Peggy inside – no – take her to Judge Oliver’s home – anywhere safe.
[Peggy refuses to go with Andrew – he can’t physically touch her to force her. So stand to guard her.
Otis and Sam Adams rush in at the back of the crowd. Sam’s wife Betsy joins him]
OTIS
Too late! Hancock told me someone got the South and North Enders drunk… but so many have joined them!
SAM
Betsy – this isn’t safe.
BETSY
They’re going to ruin all the respect and unity you built
[Sam starts going from one person to another, saying “We’re loyal civilized people – are we going to let ourselves act like criminals? Help us stop this!” – Betsy does same, working the crowd but going to the few women in the crowd – “Get your man to go home” . Otis takes his cue and goes to others… Hancock joins them too… but no one listens to them or laughs at them, yells at them to join The People, or worse, snap back at the men (not at Betsy – just polite ignoring of her). They burrow into the crowd.
Throughout, Hutchinson is addressing the crowd. TBD – Get his actual words from letters and splice into these 3 sections:]
HUTCHINSON
I understand your concerns – we have always had the right to elect representatives who can pass laws and tax us.
[Yells – cannot tax us – only our elected reps can… Otis joins in with his phrase from earlier – Taxation without representation is tyranny – but Sam shuts him up, gestures to keep the crowd peaceful.]
Hutchinson, Continues
The king can appoint administrators and judges because we can wait two months for the royal papers to arrive… I’ve heard you – we all know the king gave us charters allowing us to set up our own elected assemblies of elected representatives.
[Some cheers from crowd mixed with shouts like “Then stop the Stamp tax!”
Hutchinson, Continues
Each colony has rights… But Parliament did not give up the right to pass laws that are necessary for all colonies…
[Crowd starts jeering, throwing things.]
PEGGY HUTCHINSON
Father – come – you have to leave!
HUTCHINSON
Andrew! I told you to take her to safety.PEGGY
I’m not leaving without you!
ANDREW
Come with me, Miss Hutchinson. You can get someone to call the sheriff. I promise, I’ll come back to help him.
PEGGY
It will be too late. Father
[Rioters rush up to the porch. Andrew Hutchinson away. Peggy follows. The three watch in horror from a safe distance and the crowd loots, bringing their elegant thing out and giving to people to take away… boxes of papers are just dumped….torches start fire. The house starts to burn – Hutchinson forces himself from his slave Andrew to try to collect his papers from the ground.
[Hutchinson is desperately trying to collect papers from ground as rioters step on them, push Hutchinson out of their way as they run in and out of the housewith his possessions]
Hutchinson
My history – our history
[Andrew rushes in, fights off attacks, grabs and drags Hutchinson, still clutching papers, to safety.
Middle: (Next Plan)
INT. HUTCHINSON’S OFFICE – DAY
[Hutchinson has been awake all night, in same clothes, trying to sort his papers. Standing near him is Judge Oliver. And sitting near by, the Tax Commissioner Robinson. Quietly, merchants including Hancock and shopkeepers, come in to put their hands on his shoulders, whisper apologies – Hancock, others
[Otis runs in, weeping, gives Hutchinson an unwanted bear hug, Tax Commissioner pulls him off]
OTIS
My deep apologies! Damn them. Damn Sam Adams. Believe me, Thomas – Mr. Hutchinson. I will fight them to the death. I was so wrong. –
JUDGE OLIVER
[starts his rant again – TBD get from book]
HUTCHINSON
Thank you, Mr. Otis. That took courage and decency.
OTIS
How could I be so misled. I was so wrong. You were right – our nation is the only nation in the world where Lords and Commoners can elect their own representatives in Parliament. We can’t destroy that beautiful order – with our monarch serving all the people, defending us –
[Gestures for Oliver Andrew to get Otis out – which he does, firmly, with contempt. Practically throws him out, closes the door – cutting off the line of people waiting to apologize.]
JUDGE OLIVER
[Rant against the people continues – get the actual words]
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
You know you are in danger here. All the people of your colony are in danger. You don’t have enough police. Your militia cant be trusted – they may be part of the mob.
HUTCHINSON
You saw how people apologized – they are still lined up.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Apologies only because your home was destroyed. They care about property at least. But they wont stop fighting you
HUTCHINSON
My family and I can move to our country home in Milton. We will be all right. But my writings – the history of each person who built our colony from nothing . I was bringing them to life again – each burning page was their second death
JUDGE OLIVER
[Ranting against people again]
HUTCHINSON
Judge Oliver. Think. The ugly violence last night – so many people coming to apologize.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Those radicals – they will stir them up again. You need to call for troops from England.
HUTCHINSON
That will only inflame them again… But if we build on this foundation – their goodwill right now. Show them we are fellow citizens. They’ve seen me as their competitor for royal appointments. As if because I may be wealthier, I think I’m better. The radicals are making them fantasize about equality… I can show I am listening to them, respect their concerns about taxes. Build consensus. I can write Lord XXXX – explain the reasoning for repealing the Stamp Act. Just focus on tariffs on imports.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Then they win.
HUTCHINSON
Not about winning. We must rebuild trust – this is our opportunity. To reconnect with people of influence, men of commerce. Please – open the door.
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Sounds ridiculous. That mob last night could have killed you. And your daughter.
HUTCHINSON
Let the next one in. I will stay here, accepting their shared grief.
[Robinson lets in the next one and leaves himself. Otis’s Tory wife come in. As he leaves:]
COMMISSIONER ROBINSON
Whatever you do, ask the king for protection.
RUTH OTIS
Does he mean the royal army? [Hutchinson nods] You need troops. My husband – the people – he has started an anger in them. He will not stop. None of them will
[She touches him carefully]
I am so very sorry. I wonder. Should you and I just take our children home to the Mother Country?
[Hutchinson looks at her for a moment, wishing]
HUTCHINSON
I must save the unity of – our nation. The Mother Country needs us. Our colony – all the others. We need Great Britain. The only nation in the world to allow the people to elect their reps in Parl – if we look divided, the kings of Spain, France, Russia – even the Ottomans
JUDGE OLIVER
Mrs. Otis, how could you ever marry that Satanic madman? The Cunninghams – you come from one of our best families.
RUTH
Peter – what could I do? His father and my father, both Colonels in our long war against the French. And before he became political – James was an excellent lawyer.
[To Hutchinson]
And I saw how happy you and your Margaret were. Oh, dear, there are many waiting to give you their commiserations and support. I shouldn’t take up your time.
[She starts to leave. Looks back]
If I can help in any way…
Ending – Plan in Action
EXT. OUTSIDE GREEN DRAGON TAVERN
[Sam is walking with his wife Betsy near the tavern. Former friends pass, nod. Hurry away. Some ignore him. Merchants, shop keepers. friends, avoiding Sam. Some mutter negative comments, some look at him and laugh. Most ignore Sam’s nod of greeting.]
[REWRITE NOTE – Revise this so as they talk, they are feeling their love for each other and lighten the political talk]
“So glad His Majesty appointed Thomas Hutchinson to be our new Governor – first American-born governor!”
“His inauguration today starts a new government. Orderly. Peaceful. Hutchinson will try to get the Stamp Act repealed – but going through the process, not using the mobs!”
“If you want to show your support, I’m sure they’ll let you into the inauguration party – seriously. We’ll all be better off if we stand together against the violent extremists.”
BETSY
They think you caused the riots. So unfair. You were standing up for liberty
SAM ADAMS
We must keep standing for liberty
BETSY
Who’s “we?” No one even wants to say hello to you now. I heard Hutchinson’s men got people to get the mobs drunk.
SAM
Probably. We need to be closer to the people. To the poorest of the poor. Keep them closer to us
BETSY
Question is how.
SAM
I don’t know. But what I do know is someday England will be a tiny island, the American colonies will be the new power . [TO DO: get exact quote from letter]
BETSY
Shhh – don’t put your name at the top of the King’s hanging list.
SAM
Why? We are loyal to our king, aren’t we? Our charters already give each colony’s assembly the right to make our own laws and tax ourselves through our elected representatives.
BETSY
But will the king support 13 little Parliaments in the New World – or just one in London?
SAM
Why not? We can all stay loyal to the king. Little Parliaments in the New World. All loyal to the king, just like the Parliament in England. But we must keep standing for liberty.
BETSY
But if no one stands with you? You brought together merchants, shopkeepers, craftsmen, laborers. Now they think you caused the riot.
SAM
Will you stand with me?
BETSY
Do you have to ask?!
SAM
Even if it’s just the two of us. If they take away our right to govern and tax ourselves through our elected representatives, that is the first step to giving Parliament a tyrant’s control over us.
###
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Lesson 14 act 2
I learned by writing act 3 and4.every scene has beginning, middle. And end. eliminate some scene which are irrelevant. but not sure you can add subtext or not.
Scene 3
begin
EXT. LEE COUNTY – SHOP – NIGHT
Jeff as he closes shop and leaps toward van, He smokes.
JEFF
Where do you live?
ANDREW
We live in Fort Myers.
Jeff opens van door throws the cigarette. He picks Up the knife from the van seat and hop in.
JEFF
Jump in Andrew?
Andrew shivers seeing the big knife. Andrew hesitates but Jeff dictates. JEFF (CONT’D) Do I have to pick you up. Right Now -hope in. Quick. Andrew leaps in the van.
Jeff uses Andrew for running his shop and he plays card. Jeff leaves, wife Julia watching him. She lock the shop and leave. Andrew tries to escape. He knocks window door. But there is pitch dark. Nobody is there. Truck pass through he yells. His voice lost in truck sound. Andrews hear the car sound and hurry and sits near cash register.
.
EXT. LEE COUNTY – JEFF VAN – NIGHT
Jeff about to get accident when a truck gives horn. They turn their trucks sharply. Jeff parks van outside the shop.
INT. JEFF SHOP – NIGHT
Rains pours as Jeff enters the shop and opens the cash register, counting money. Andrew eyes on him.
JEFF (abuses)
Only 400 dollars.
Where is the rest of the money?
ANDREW
That’s all I collected today.
JEFF (uses bad words
) You liar
Jeff slaps Andrew as he exhales high. ANDREW Sir, people don’t show up because of the rain. JEFF Don’t you lie to me. You liar, Lock the door now and come outside.
Scene 4.
Jeff picks up the money and going out. Andrew walks towards bathroom, and he Closes the bathroom door behind. Andrew nabs the pant belt out and pokes the wire gauge window. As he pulls the belt out when he breaks the flowerpot lying over there. Andrew collects the flowerpots pieces to clear the ways when he relocates his shirt gets in the nails. Andrew tries to untangle it. The shirt torn. He tries to jump out of the windowpane, but small hole obstructs him. He fixes the hole again and jumps out. EXT. INT. JEFF SHOP – NIGHT Jeff smokes, stands outside the truck watches for Andrew while looks towards the shop off and on. He gets suspicious, strolls toward shop, opens the door and looks around for Andrew inside the shop. INT. JEFF SHOP – NIGHT Jeff knocks the rest room door. Nobody answers. He Continuous banging the door. Jeff knocks the cigarette on the side wall and throw it away and tries to break the door as it breaks, he bumps in. Jeff sees the wire gauge window dismantle. Jeff peeps out cannot see anybody and he picks up the keys.
Jeff abuses Andrew’s
EXT. JEFF SHOP – NIGHT Jeff closes the shop and sits in the truck and starts the engine after a while he turns of the engine and jumps out of the truck. He is going now the back of the shop. Andrew hides behind the big bush. He is breathing heavily Jeff cross the bush and turns his head when a pot makes sound as rain drops pours on a brass flower plant. Jeff picks up the flowerpot flung it hard. It flies or falls down on the bushes where Andrew’s is hiding. ANDREW Ouch! Jeff hears sound and moves back as he comes near the bushes and hold him hard from hairs. Push him up. Andrew screams. JEFF Where are you going? if You goanna run away. I Will kill you! Jeff seizes his throat. Andrew terrifies as the water Rolls from his eyes. ANDREW, please let me go home. I- I miss, Miss my parents and schoolmates. JEFF How many times
JEFF How many times I told you, your parents died in the storm. You are the only one who survive. ANDREW (SOBBING) Sir Then let me free. Jeff abuses Andrew.
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Day 14 Act 2 Middle Scenes
James’ Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is… my hero is realizing that returning to her old job was a mistake as her boss devalues her, intentionally or not, and creates mental anguish for her. She knows she can do better and is learning that lesson the hard way. The balancing act she’s working out is caring for her customers and fulfilling her own dreams. She enjoys making her customers content and happy that she’s forgetting to put herself first every once in a while. The mental tug of war forces her to reevaluate her life because time is passing her by.
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Philips Act 2 TP – Midpoint
“What I learned doing this assignment is finding a deeper meaning for the hero to complete his goal”
The manager destroys Dmitris’ trailer in order to make him play, and reveals himself to be the demon
The manager discovers Vincents true identity and offers Dmitri a deal – he can save Virginia and himself but includes the band if he fails
Same journey Different Meanting now Dmitri wants to complete the contract to save not just him but Viginia and the band
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Lesson 14 Act 2 Middle Scenes Assignment
Laura Woodworth’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
(Assignment handwritten on legal pad. )
What I learned doing this assignment is to find ways to show that the old ways are not working anymore, which is helping me add in interest and conflict.
INT. HOUSE – NIGHT – CONTINUOUS
Natalia pushes the door closed and breathes deeply. Safe.
IRINA (O.C.)
That you, Tali?
Irina appears in the kitchen doorway, drying a dish, her eyes probing — searching for information.
IRINA
How did you day go?
Natalia turns from her as she wrestles out of her heavy coat and hangs it.
NATALIA
As usual.
She turns back.
NATALIA
I’ve got homework.
She moves upstairs, away from the watchful eyes of her sister and into her room. She closes the door and moves to the window, carefully pulling back the curtain. The two men are stationed across the street, talking into their cuffs. She closes the curtain and steps back, out of view.
TAP, TAP. The door eases open. Irina pops her head in.
IRINA
Are you hungry?
NATALIA
No — I’m fine. Thanks.
The question seems strange. Irina pushes in and settles on the bed like it’s normal for her to care about Natalia.
IRINA
Did you eat with the American? At that fancy hotel?
NATALIA
I ate the soup on campus.
IRINA
I bet the food there is lovely. At the hotel that is.
NATALIA
I’ve got a lot of reading to do tonight.
Their eyes lock; an internal standoff of sorts. Irina stands and tries to be endearing.
IRINA
Well, if you do eat there, wrap a bit in a napkin for me.
She exits, pulling the door behind her.
IRINA
Happy studying.
Alone, Natalia stands quietly in the middle of the room, listening, sensing — and then she searches, running her hand under the lip of the desk, looking up into the lampshade, behind the headboard — and then she sees it. She quietly pulls her desk chair to the middle of the room and stands on it to observe a small dark object tucked under the lip of the ceiling light. A bug. Recording every word, every conversation.
She carefully steps down and sets the chair back in it’s place, hardly daring to breath.
INT. ADMINISTRATION OFFICE – DAY
NATALIA
I’m being tracked.
The Administrator sits calmly while she defends herself.
COLLEGE ADMINISTRATOR
It sounds like you’re upset.
NATALIA
I’m only doing what you’ve asked me to do — interpret for the American. I’m still at the top of my classes and I’m sure you know my loyalty and support.
COLLEGE ADMINISTRATOR
Perhaps it was a coincidence. I doubt you have anything to be concerned about.
He talks her down. She settles.
COLLEGE ADMINISTRATOR
I will ask, however, is there anyone around you who could be suspect? Any names?
NATALIA
No — I don’t think so…
COLLEGE ADMINISTRATOR
Someone whose loyalties seem misplaced? Someone who you feel uncomfortable around…
She considers. He presses.
COLLEGE ADMINISTRATOR
Sometimes they’re hiding in plain sight. On the surface they seem devoted, but if you look closer…
(beat)
Your insight could be very valuable.
NATALIA
I don’t know —
(beat)
There is a shopkeeper…
EXT. MOSCOW UNIVERSITY – DAY
Natalia walks across the university and sees Alex manning a table to sign up to help at the Pioneer Brigade summer camp. She approaches him.
ALEX
Where’s your American?
NATALIA
He’s not my American. I’m on my way to the hotel now. Are you helping out for the summer camp?
ALEX
I’m one of the leaders this year.
He tries hard to conceal his pride, but she knows it means a lot to him.
NATALIA
That’s really important. Sign me up too.
(laughing)
You can boss me around.
ALEX
I’d like that — not the bossy part, but serving together. Ever since that American came, you’ve been occupied.
They share a smile.
INT. NATIONAL HOTEL – DAY
Jack opens the door — and then walks briskly back off to the bedroom where his suitcases lie open.
JACK
Make yourself at home. I’ve got to pack.
NATALIA
Pack?
JACK
They’ve decided I need to renew my visa. I’m traveling to Finland to cross the border and hopefully come back to finish my research.
She eyes the loaded breakfast tray but resists the temptation.
NATALIA
That’s sudden.
He comes out with his bags.
JACK
Eat something. They always bring way more than I can eat.
NATALIA
No. Thank you.
JACK
Lost your appetite?
(beat)
Are you okay?
He looks at her intently, trying to get a read on her — and her stiffness.
NATALIA
Is this related to the forbidden book you left in the village?
JACK
No one should be censored for sharing truth.
She picks up one of his bags.
NATALIA
Ready? I’ll carry this down for you.
EXT. NATIONAL HOTEL – DAY
Jack climbs into a waiting car. Natalia watches him drive away — and then she smiles, relieved.
EXT. MOSCOW – DAY
Two KGB AGENTS approach Alex as he packs up his table and flyers. He comes to attention.
ALEX
Comrades.
KGB AGENT
Have you gained good support for the camp?
ALEX
Every spot filled.
KGB AGENT
Excellent. You do good work.
KGB AGENT 2
We have an assignment for you. Something we feel you are well qualified for.
ALEX
You know my loyalties.
KGB AGENT 2
There’s always a testing ground.
ALEX
Whatever you want. I am willing.
A group of STUDENTS walk by. The agent leans in to speak in a low-voice that only Alex can hear — then leans back out.
KGB AGENT 2
Understood?
ALEX
Of course. As you wish.
Alex watches them walk away, steeling his heart for the new assignment.
INT. HOUSE/KITCHEN – DAY
Natalia stirs a kettle of soup, humming as she works. Oleg comes in and she greets him happily.
NATALIA
Dinner’s ready. Did you find bread?
Silent, he sets a hard loaf of bread on the counter and turns to leave the room. Concerned, she calls after him.
NATALIA
Are you going to sit?
OLEG
I’m going to clean up.
He pauses at the door, his back to her.
OLEG
My orders changed.
NATALIA
What do you mean? You’ve only got one more year of school.
OLEG
Well they’ve decided I’d make a better laborer than a doctor.
He turns and blasts her.
OLEG
What did you say?
NATALIA
What do you mean —
OLEG
All your work with Jack. Going places, drawing attention to yourself —
NATALIA
I didn’t —
OLEG
What did you tell them?
NATALIA
Nothing. I told them nothing.
He stomps off, leaving Natalia to wonder.
INT. BEDROOM – NIGHT
Natalia enters the room, seeking solace, seeking peace. She looks up at the light. The bug is not there anymore. She moves to her desk. Her books have been moved — her pen lays in a different spot. Someone’s been in the room.
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30-Day Screenplay Lesson 14: Act 2 Middle Scenes
Bonnie’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is that I’m amazed how many times I have been able to think of times in my life when I felt empowered and use those feelings to power my writing.
INT./EXT. MYKA’S LOFT – NIGHT
Key Scene 2: NEW PLAN: Myka makes a plan and executes it.
She swallows her pride, and decides to apologize to her friends, and get the old gang together, so she can get back her juju. Myka calls Gabi, Yuri and Rafi, but no one answers.
BEGINNING: Myka packs a few boxes and a rucksack and tosses them into her van. She pulls out her phone, scrolls through her contacts… hesitates.
MYKA
No, I can’t. They hate me.
Stashes her phone back in her pocket. Goes back inside, comes out with a box full of camping supplies, slides it into the back of the van, slams the door shut.
Takes out her phone, taps GABI. It rings. Goes to voicemail. She clicks off.
She calls Yuri. No answer. Then Rafi. Voicemail. She starts to leave a message, changes her mind. Hangs up, goes inside.
INT. MYKA’S LOFT – DAY
MIDDLE: Myka, clearly distressed, continues packing and cleaning energetically. Falls breathless into the couch.
END: Pulls out her phone, calls Gabi. It goes to voicemail. This time, she leaves a message.
MYKA
Hey, Gabi… uhmm, it’s me. I know it’s been a minute, but please don’t delete this message.
(deep sigh)
It’s… it’s the Multiversity. It’s deteriorating, I’m losing my juju and I… need your help. Call me.
INT. GABI’S HOUSE – DAY
Gabi’s phone buzzes. She sees Myka’s name and ignores the call. It rings again. She waits, picks up and listens to the message. An expression of concern comes over her face.
She continues painting, but the colors begin to turn shades of grey.
GABI
What the…? Okay, something’s off.
Gabi fears something is off in the Multiversity.
EXT. RAFI’S PLACE – DAY
Rafi lies in bed reading. Her phone rings, she picks up and hears Myka’s voice. Hangs up. Goes back to reading her book. The words on the page fade in and out.
INT. YURI’S FLAT – DAY
Yuri plays his violin. His phone rings. Shakes his head, doesn’t answer. Continues playing his violin, but the music sounds dissonant and screechy.
EXT. MYKA’S LOFT – DAY
Hands over the keys to her loft to the owner. Gets in her van and drives away.
EXT. TREEHOUSE – DAY
Key Scene 3: PLAN IN ACTION: Not only does her plan fail, but…
BEGINNING: Rafi and Yuri show up. Gabi greets them and convinces them to come inside. They climb up reluctantly.
INT. TREEHOUSE – DAY
MIDDLE: They hear out Myka with Gabi chiming in…
Myka stands in the middle of the floor in anticipation.
Rafi, Yuri and Gabi climb up into the treehouse and sit on the old sofa opposite her, without a word.
Gabi gives her the go-ahead nod.
MYKA
Okay, here’s the plan, guys —
GABI
Myka?
MYKA
Right… uh, I guess I owe you an apology for dropping off the radar after our… my big debacle.
Silence.
MYKA
Yeah, okay, I know. I’m sorry. I was a bitch. I’ve really missed you and my life hasn’t been the same without the old gang.
Gabi and Rafi exchange glances, trying not to grin. Yuri crosses his arms and stares at Myka.
MYKA
Sooo… Am I forgiven?
YURI
Depends.
MYKA
On?
RAFI
On the condition that you keep your huge ego in check.
GABI
No temper tantrums.
YURI
No micromanaging.
MYKA
What? Really?
GABI
Do you think you can handle it?
MYKA
Of course I can handle… Okay, fine. Agreed.
RAFI
So what’s your genius plan?
MYKA
I’m losing my juju and I need…
They glare at her.
MYKA
Okay, look, there’s something weird going on in the Multiversity and if I know you guys at all, I’m sure you feel it too. The point is, what are we going to do about it? If we could just figure this out, get the old gang together, do some dream synesthesia research… maybe we could fix things. What do you say?
GABI
The plan is to meet here where it all started. Practice shared synesthetic dreaming, and when we feel ready, enter the Multiversity and find out what’s going on.
RAFI
I’m in.
YURI
When do we start?
MYKA
If we’re going to recreate what we had back then…
GABI
We’d better get this place ready.
The plan is to revive the gang and meet there to continue their synesthetic dream-research, as long as Myka doesn’t get up to her “old tricks”, bossiness and temper tantrums. In other words, on the condition that Myka’s big ego doesn’t get in the way.
SEVERAL SHOTS:
They clean up and repair the treehouse. Myka slips into her Old Ways a few times, and the others call her on it, but playfully.
INT. TREEHOUSE – NIGHT
END: Practice synesthetic dreaming there every night until they’re ready to go back into the Multiversity for battle.
They drink mugwort tea, sleep and practice meeting in a shared dream.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by Diane Denham.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 2 months ago by
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Susan’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment: I learned not to stress over the actual details of “how am I going to get my characters from the inciting incident on to the road to start their journey”? While building Act 2, the answer just revealed itself!
INT. HOME OFFICE – DAY
Shelby sits at a desk concentrating on a video playing on her laptop. The doorbell RINGS.
INT. FOYER – DAY
Without waiting for an invitation, Abbey lets herself in.
ABBEY
Knock, knock, anybody home?
SHELBY (VO)
Come on in… Oh wait, you already did.
Abbey stops to check her appearance in the hall mirror.
ABBEY
You ass, where are you?
SHELBY (VO)
In the office.
Abbey knows the floor plan like her own home and heads down the hallway to
INT. HOME OFFICE – DAY
Abbey drops her purse into a chair and curiously moves behind the desk to peer over Shelby’s shoulder.
ABBEY
Oooh, whatchya watching, Tik Tok? Face Book?
SHELBY
You Tube
ABBEY
Let me see, come on, scootch over, so I can see.
Shelby complies but it bitterly disappointed by the video of camp life instruction.
ABBEY
What the heck is that?
SHELBY (Distracted)
I told you, the University of You Tube. I am learning the basics of camp life procedures and protocols.
ABBEY
Ugh, stop it.
She reaches over Shelby’s shoulder to cut off the video.
ABBEY
Here are the basics, relax and just go with the flow. There, lesson over, now come on, we are going to be late.
SHELBY
Late for what, I can’t go anywhere. Abbey, I’m serious, I can’t let Liam down again, I need to be prepared this time around.
ABBEY
Agreed, but first you have to let go of this stress and anxiety, and what better way to do that than a spa mani-pedi?
SHELBY
Oh, that sounds so tempting, I don’t know.
ABBEY
It includes unlimited free wine and mimosa’s.
With that last, Shelby doesn’t hesitate to close her laptop and push away from the desk.
SHELBY
Sold, let’s go, but then I have to get home and finish these tutorials.
Abbey rolls her eyes, shaking her head, she grabs her purse and follows Shelby from the office.
ABBEY
Of course, but just remember, if you gotta do something that is absolutely abhorrent to you, you better look good doing it.
EXT. RENAISSANCE FAIR – DAY
Placeholder: Shelby and Liam spend a perfectly wonderful chilly day at the fair, putting Shelby at ease for the night of camping yet to come.
INT. TENT – NIGHT
Shelby and Liam are bundled inside sleeping bags in the tent. The temperature has plummeted and both bodies shiver almost convulsively.
SHELBY (Teeth chattering)
Li… Li… Liam, are you awake?
He snuggles close to her, trying to share his warmth.
LIAM
Kind of hard to sleep in subzero temps, you ok?
SHELBY
Not really, you think we can go back to the bathroom? See if they got the heater working.
LIAM (Looks at his watch)
It’s only been 40 minutes, I’m sure maintenance won’t come until morning to repair the heater.
SHELBY
I’m so sorry, if I hadn’t left the propane heater on while we were at the fair, there would probably still be some gas to heat the tent.
LIAM
It’s ok, we’ll get more gas when the shop opens in the morning.
SHELBY
If we survive til morning.
He feels her shiver violently beside him.
LIAM
Come on, let’s go sit by the fire.
SHELBY
Outside? Where it’s even colder?
LIAM
The wind’s not bad and we have enough wood to keep the fire stoked throughout the night. It’ll be like in the olden days, sleeping under the open sky.
SHELBY
Except back then, they didn’t have a choice.
Liam winces at the dig and prods her gently.
LIAM
Hey, we can hang it up and find a hotel nearby.
SHELBY
No, this is your time, and I’m no quitter.
LIAM
This is our time, and I wouldn’t call it quitting, in truth, it’s probably more sensible. Motel 6? They may have left the light on?
SHELBY
We came to camp, and camping we shall do. Go get that fire stoked and I’ll grab the sleeping bags and be right behind you.
Liam gives her a squeeze and before crawling toward the exit.
LIAM
Old Bob Bodette, you think that guy is still alive?
SHELBY
Probably not, he most likely froze to death looking for the motel where someone turned the light off.
EXT. CAMPSITE 3 – NIGHT
Shelby exits the tent, arms full with both bags and a deck of cards. She is walking clothes rack having donned just about every piece of clothing in her possession, including socks on her hands.
SHELBY
Look, I found the trivia cards.
Liam smiles and holds up a bourbon bottle.
LIAM
I found a little something also, to warm the gut?
The fire is blazing and they settle right up to the edge of the fire. With the heat from the flames and the shots of bourbon the chill melts from their bones.
Placeholder: They pass the night drinking and quizzing each other from their Renaissance trivia cards, keeping the fire rolling. Liam’s boots catch fire from propping them unknowingly over the flames. They fall asleep curled right up to the fire ring.
EXT. CAMPSITE 3 – MORNING
The couple awakes, woolen hats pulled down low over their heads, with scarves wrapped around their head and face. Liam pokes the still glowing embers, feeding more logs to the fire.
Once the blaze is kicking out heat again, Shelby crawls out from her covers.
SHELBY
I’ll get breakfast going.
Shelby rummages through the cooler, everything is frozen solid.
SHELBY
Um, Liam, I think we have a problem.
She is now shuffling items in the storage bin.
LIAM
What’s the matter?
SHELBY
Everything is frozen, and I mean, everything; the water, milk, eggs…
Shelby raises a bottle of liquid dish soap from the container.
SHELBY
Even the liquid soap. I didn’t think liquid soap could even freeze.
He sees where the mood is shifting and quickly reacts.
LIAM
Hey, it’s no biggie. We’ll grab breakfast at the diner, then get some more propane, it’s all good.
She drops the soap and feels the calm settle in.
SHELBY
Ok, sounds good, but first, I’ve got to pee.
LIAM
That make two of us, come on, we’ll hit the bathroom on the way out.
EXT. RESTROOM – DAY
Still bundled head to toe, they split at the restroom heading to their respective facilities. From inside the woman’s bath Shelby SCREAMS.
Shelby and Liam emerge simultaneously from opposing entryways, bare faced, caps removed, speaking at the same time.
LIAM
WHAT THE FUCK?
SHELBY
MY FACE!
Having nearly collided, they back up to examine each other’s image. The proximity to the fire the night before causing severe thermal burns leaves their faces scorched red with tiny blisters across the surface. Shelby can’t maintain her composure any longer, she breaks down.
SHELBY
I hate camping!
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Lesson 14 Act 2 Middle Scenes
Subject Line: Patrick McCormick’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I Learned: Even though some scenes may be challenging, when you just keep writing they show up.
Title: THE THRIFT STORE
Genre: Sci Fi Drama
Protagonist: Cody Thayer
Change Agent: Elizabeth
Antagonist: Jesub
Overall Theme: Change – the Constant in the Universe
ACT 2 – KEY SCENE 2 BEAT SHEET – PROTAGONIST TAKES ON PLAN AND EXECUTES IT
INT. CHILDHOOD HOME – NIGHT
Cody now strong enough stands up and confronts her mother. Mother announces they are moving away.
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
Cody sneaks out of bedroom window and runs away.
INT. CHILDHOOD HOME – NIGHT
Joyce found out Cody ran away & calls ex-husband cop and tells him to ‘handle this’
ACT 2 – KEY SCENE 3 BEAT SHEET – NOT ONLY DOES THEIR PLAN FAIL, BUT…
INT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
Cody tries to get ride out of town.
EXT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
Cody almost gets raped and murdered – recreating her karma from before.
INT. THRIFT STORE – NIGHT
Elizabeth senses Cody in trouble, de-manifests.
EXT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
Elizabeth re-manifests, dis-creating and saving her just in time.
INT. THRIFT STORE – NIGHT
Cody falls into traumatized ball as Elizabeth consoles her.
ACT 2 – KEY SCENE 2 OUTLINE – PROTAGONIST TAKES ON PLAN AND EXECUTES IT
INT. CHILDHOOD HOME – NIGHT
BEGINNING: Cody now strong enough stands up to Joyce/her mother.
MIDDLE: Joyce announces they’re moving away, and Cody must go as a minor.
END: Cody tries to rebel, Joyce threatens to tell her psychiatrist. Cody runs away.
ACT 2 – KEY SCENE 3 OUTLINE – NOT ONLY DOES THEIR PLAN FAIL, BUT…
EXT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
BEGINNING: Cody runs away, at truck stop tries to hitch a ride
MIDDLE: Cody gets apprehended by 2 men who try to rape and murder her
END: Elizabeth saves Cody by dis-creating her just in time back to Thrift Store.
ACT 2 – KEY SCENE 2 – PROTAGONIST TAKES ON PLAN AND EXECUTES IT
INT. CHILDHOOD HOME – NIGHT
Cody now strong enough stands up and confronts her mother.
CODY
Hello mother.
JOYCE
Hello dear. How was your day? I have some exciting news.
CODY
I’ve had time to contemplate… lots of things. Things from my past.
JOYCE
I see. And what did you find?
CODY
Things aren’t always what they seem. Such as when looking back at my molestation. The fear, the trauma, and the healing.
JOYCE
What that man did to you, you’re lucky to be alive.
CODY
Yes, that would have been inconvenient. Instead I lived… lucky me. You and dad were there when I needed it most. I’m still troubled.
JOYCE
Of course dear, anyone would be traumatized. We’re so glad we didn’t lose you.
CODY
And yet you didn’t. So mother, let me ask you, why did you murder my baby?
JOYCE
We didn’t murder the baby, it wasn’t even formed yet. And, not having a bastard son, saved you a lot of grief.
CODY
Yes, you didn’t hesitate to take care of that issue right away. Then I thought about, why were they in such a hurry, to take my baby from me. Then I realized, you didn’t do it for me.
JOYCE
How dare you say that! We did it for all of us. Could you imagine, raising a child that came from the rape of the mother?
CODY
Actually I can. I can imagine all of it, and you know what, you’re greatest reason wasn’t to watch out for me, it was to save your and dad’s precious public reputation. And that’s why you sacrificed the life of my child, who wasn’t even born yet.
JOYCE
Honey, a soul brought into this world should not have to deal with the trauma of its parents, it should be born out of love. Your rape, that’s about as traumatic as it gets.
CODY
That’s true. But… she had a soul. A soul you kept from coming into this world.
JOYCE
We all make sacrifices dear, we just have to choose the lesser of two evils as our suffering.
CODY
Hm, you will never change, will you mother. And that’s why I’ve decided to move out.
JOYCE
What? You can’t.
CODY
But I’ve grown up, I have a job, and moved on. You should try it sometime.
JOYCE
Besides, our plans have changed. We’re moving, and you’re coming with me.
CODY
No! I can’t leave. My job is really really important.
JOYCE
You don’t have a choice dear. I’m still your legal guardian. And besides, you wouldn’t want me to tell your court appointed psychiatrist you are having relapses.
CODY
That’s a lie. You know I’m not.
JOYCE
Yes, but he doesn’t know that, and it’d be your word against mine.
CODY
Did someone fuck with you as a kid? Because that’s pretty screwed up. You don’t even feel like my mother right now.
JOYCE
Doesn’t matter. The courts say I am. Pack your things, you’re quitting tomorrow.
EXT. STREETS – NIGHT
Cody sneaks out of bedroom window, looking back at the only home she ever knew, and runs away. Hitchhiking out of town, she stopped at the local truck stop.
EXT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
Going inside she sits at a booth. The waitress shows up and she orders coffee.
INT. CHILDHOOD HOME – NIGHT
JOYCE
at Cody’s bedroom door
Cody, I’m sorry, for everything. Maybe we can have a fresh start. This move will be good for all of us.
Opening the door, she goes to the bed and finds Cody has escaped.
JOYCE (con’t)
on the phone to ex-husband
Hello Jim, Joyce. Cody’s gone… I told her we’re moving. I know, I know. Well we can’t have her running around. She’s still in my custody, and you know what that means. You’re the father, and a cop. You better handle this.
ACT 2 – KEY SCENE 3 – NOT ONLY DOES THEIR PLAN FAIL, BUT…
INT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
Cody sneaks out her bedroom window and walks to the street, hitching a ride to get out of town, a mixture of emotions and unsureness travel her face. Getting out at the truck stop to find a ride, she sits at a diner booth.
WAITRESS
What can I get you sweetie?
CODY
Just coffee thanks.
Looking around, she spots a lone trucker at the counter. Asking him if she can ride along, he said no. Sipping coffee and glancing around, she spots a few guys in another booth. Asking them they said sure.
EXT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
As they were going to the car, one of the guys said;
JOSH/FIRST TRAVELER
How you fixing to pay sweetie? Nobody rides for free.
CODY
I can put in gas, buy you meals.
ADAM/SECOND TRAVELER
Hear that Josh, she’s gonna pay our way.
At the other side of their car in the dark parking lot.
JOSH
Well we were thinking something else. You’re looking mighty fine.
ADAM
With pretty lips like that, I bet you’re really good with that mouth, a blow job to remember.
CODY
pulling away
What? No! Get off of me!
JOSH
pulling out a switch blade and opened the rear car door, as Adam covered her mouth.
I love it when they struggle.
As the men restrained her, Adam holding her arms as Josh pulled down her pants, she started flailing about. Thoughts of her rape came flooding back, and thoughts of “Oh god, I’m gonna die.”
INT. ELIZABETH’S HOME – NIGHT
Suddenly realizing Cody was in trouble, Elizabeth de-manifested.
EXT. TRUCK STOP – NIGHT
Just then a bright flash appeared as Elizabeth manifested right before them. They couldn’t compute as Elizabeth went in a microsecond to Cody and de-manifested her just as Josh went to mount her.
INT. ELIZABETH’S HOME – NIGHT
Manifesting back at Elizabeth’s home, Cody crying falls into traumatized ball as a seated Elizabeth consoles her.
I’m sorry!… ah ha ha, I’m sorry!!
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