Lesson 17

[Tita Beal Anntares]

Tita’s Key Scene Improvements(17)

What I learned from this assignment:

· The distinction between “purpose” of a scene and a summary of “what happens” is very important. Too easy to overintellectualize with the purpose so the script becomes stilted… and also too easy to get caught up in weaving an exciting, interesting story without connecting it to the purpose, from my as well as the characters’ points of view. The elements of a story may be very different depending on purpose. And even if story is full of sturm and drang, i.e. exciting, it is meaningless without purpose. The earlier SU lessons prepared us to think about action as it relates to meaningful connection to theme or characters as well as overall story. Thinking ouot loud…

· When I improve this current script and start the next, I need to keep in mind the key scenes that ground the structure of a story as I work out character/plot:

o Opening

o Inciting Incident

o Act I Turning Point

o Midpoint

o Act II Turning Point

o Climax

o Resolution

o Final Scene

Then review each of these and other scenes: For each scene:Determine the purpose and make sure it is fulfilled powerfully. Rewrite those scenes to be emotional and meaningful.Fill each scene with interest techniques (See lesson 9).

Question in case anyone reads these assignments: Does Assignment 17 includes this instruction:

“Go to each Reveal and make sure each of these is as strong as possible.

A. Create demand for the reveal.B. Deliver the reveal dramatically.C. The reveal changes things!”

Does that instruction assume that each key scene needs a reveal or that we should just find the reveals we have built based on the story in one or more of the key scenes?

Most valuable improvements made because of this assignment (for a stage play not filmscript):

· To get started, I made a chart with 3 columns: Key Scene: / <b class=””>Purpose: / Powerful? If not…: This process of going through my revision script, filled with notes from previous assignments and some changed scenes, helped me find and check the key scenes and list the other scenes in between them. (Chart available if interested)

· Act I Turning Point – I found a way to build in a reveal for a secret that was hinted at in an earlier scene.

· I changed the Midpoint – I had it too early in Act II, despite a twist with impact. But found a stronger place for a flip with impact later in Act II.

· I think Act II TP is similar to what other dramaturgs call the crisis – the main question/conflict of the story/theme becomes central – although we don’t know what will happen.

· Many of my scenes hold well but need more dramatic action or indirect reinforcement of theme

· By focusing on purpose, I see that many of my scenes should cut to the chase. Will have to work on that by double checking for purpose of some dialogue sections. After I found a scene and described its purpose I found myself scrolling fast through the dialogue thinking it was too much no matter how interesting or needed…I’ll comb through with purpose as well as meaningful action, character profile, etc.

The chart showing all key scenes and needed improvements (plus other non-key scenes listed between the key scenes) doesn’t copy to this system but it has now become a new version of the outline that I can work with

[ZhiMin Hu]

I re-write the opening scene which originally was not made for the opening. It lacks of compelling visual elements. So, I re-wrote the scene, change the dialogue and make it much funnier.

Although the pitch guideline suggests that we should have only two elements while we introduce our project, but I can safely say that Under the Red Umbrella is a funny ghost drama.

[Julie Dod]

Subject: Julie Dod’s Key Scenes that Sell You

What I learned doing this assignment is that once you have a good structure, it is easier to go back to those structure points and focus on just those scenes. If you don’t have structure, you would be flailing from scene to wordsmithing, when you should be thinking about action, purpose and meaning, and showing not telling.

For this assignment I focused on my introduction scene, Act 4 turning point, and the Resolution. I added more character reactions in the introduction to better set up their future reactions, therefore giving the scene deeper meaning juxtaposed with the spectacle of the lively pub crowd singing and clapping along with the bar dance.

I added more character reaction to the 4^th act turning point, with a poignant exchange that set my character off again in an unknown direction, which I feel made a much deeper impact on their last scene together.

The resolution still needs work, but I’m “working” on it. The protagonist and antagonist move closer, than farther away from each other, then finally end up in an embrace. Their diaglogue was meaningful and deeply impacted each other.

The biggest “reveal” was in the Act 4 turning point, when my protagonist admits she loved the antagonist, and all he can say is “I know,” which of course is another gut punch for her. There’s still work to be done, but this was a great exercise, and one which I will visit again and again until I feel I have it right.

Thank you!

Julie

[J.R Riddle]

What I learned doing this assignment: The details of a great screenplay are all woven like a beautiful piece of fabric. Forget to include one at the right point, using the weaker thread will change the resulting product.

I moved a few scenes forward and earlier, which changed the flow, setups and reveals. I had to do some major rearranging again to hit the marks. Probably as I now move around my outline to fit this new rewritten script, I’ll find more changes to implement.

Every single scene must have a purpose, a payoff and be engaging. As I learned, there are many ways, dozens of them to create change – pick one, work it out, and pray for the best. It can always be embellished and elevated again, before going into film.

Exciting class, and I’ve learned so much. I like my script, more, and I’m optimistic some others will feel the same, and say so with a screenwriting winning script, purchased and made into film. I hope my learning to be a better writer inspires and entertains with the final product.