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Lesson 2
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35 Replies
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Elizabeth Cochrell 4 Act Structure
What I Learned doing this process is that I can give the lead Misha stronger evidence of inner change – She forces herself to be decent to the society ladies in order to get the women’s shelter funded. After she gets disqualified from the MMA fight she’s even more sick of stripping.
Also I need to show Rebecca give up on running away from Emily because she is so hurt thinking that Misha doesn’t want her after she gets kidnapped back by Emily at the midpoint.
I also need to intensify the pervert Mayor going nuts from increased public accusations and ready to abuse the daughter Rebecca to help intensify the ticking clock.
Genre: Drama
Title: Mom Fight
High Concept:
Mom Fight is about what happens when a stripper MMA fighter with a bad temper named Misha tries to take responsibility for her dog-whispering daughter Rebecca, who has run away from her rich and twisted stepmother to be with her.
Main Conflict:
The main conflict is about the jealous stepmother Emily, who’s stuck in a loveless marriage and uses the wealth and political advantages of her husband to de-moralize the stripper fighter in order to make her give up on providing Rebecca with a secure and happy life.
Act 1:
Opening:
Shows how unhappy Michelle is as a fabulous stripper who loses her pay over damages from beating up the patron who wants his money back because she won’t give him sex.
It also shows how miserable Rebecca is – her friends are jealous, her stepmother calls her fat, won’t let her have a dog and her politician dad is a sex abuser.
Inciting Incident:
When Rebecca shows up at the stripper’s home we wonder if Rebecca will run away from her hot headed bio mother too and if stripper Misha will let her stay.
Turning Point:
Sanjay the gym owner offers her the opportunity to make a lot of money in the MMA event but Misha is hesitant to do it until she gets a three-day notice in front of Rebecca. In secret Misha tries to do a high-class prostitution session to pay the bill, but when the trick says he wants anal sex she is so disgusted that she decides to commit to the dangerous MMA event instead.
Act 2:
New Plan:
Misha decides to let Rebecca stay with her and signs up for the event. She gets a loan from Sanjay the promoter to cover her mortgage and urges Rebecca to somehow convince her stepmom Emily to let her go.
Plan in action:
She starts to train regularly for the event, also allows Rebecca to do her dog business idea. Also Misha convinces Rebecca to call her stepmother and reveal where they live after she demonstrates how good at fighting she has become.
Midpoint Turning Point:
Emily tricks Rebecca and Misha and steals Rebecca back to Beverly Hills with the help of crooked detectives. Rebecca’s absence makes Misha realize how much happier she is with her new responsible life and we want Misha to do something to get Rebecca back.
Act 3:
React/Rethink:
At first when Misha thinks Rebecca doesn’t care for her anymore, she wants to get drunk and quit the event. But when the dogs won’t leave, her friends make her self-reflect and she realizes she truly wants to be responsible to Rebecca’s customers she re-enlists in the event. Misha also realizes its not Rebecca that makes her feel better but her new way of training, sticking to commitments and helping friends that gives her satisfaction and self-esteem.
New Plan:
Misha keeps training for the event and takes care of Rebecca’s dog business but still strips.
(Add to Act Three)
As for promotion for the MMA event Misha does a workshop for a mother’s club and gets on the news because they love the self-defense for self-esteem class she teaches. Then a reporter asks her why she is still a stripper?
Turning Point:
(Fix this situation in outline)
Emily gets Misha kicked out of the MMA event because she is jealous when Rebecca is happy watching Misha’s activities on the news, by feeding Misha’s criminal record (that she helped trump up) to the sports authorities.
Misha needs to adopt her inner change in an even bigger way:
(Add to outline after turning point)
After she gets kicked off the event she forces herself to call the mother’s club lady and ask her for help on starting her shelter. She can’t stand the thought of stripping anymore.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate Expression Of The Conflict:
In the locker room before the fight event, Bradley tells Misha all truths:
*Mayor Frank is the one who got her pregnant with Rebecca, not Bradley.
*Emily faked Rebecca’s goodbye text to Misha.
*Bradley fears Frank will go for Rebecca soon. (ticking clock)
Although Misha really wants revenge for Emily’s and Frank’s lies and wants to save Rebecca right away, she still fights the dangerous opponent to win the MMA event to fulfill her commitment.
Then right afterwards, in the battle to save Rebecca from Frank and Emily, Misha gets shot and we don’t know if she survives.
(Need to add to climax)
During the big fight, Rebecca is revived from her depression when she protects her wounded real mom Misha from Emily’s attack and refuses the offer of financial security from Emily.
Resolution
Mayor Frank and Bradley go to jail, Misha’s women’s shelter is combined with Rebecca’s dog whispering, and they forgive the now broken and wounded stepmother Emily.
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I like how thorough and thought out your concepts are. I can see your movie coming to life!
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Lora’s 4 Act Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is…? I think my acts II and III could be more exciting.
List the beats of your 4 Act Transformational Structure.
1. Give us the following:
Title: The World BenderGenre: Fantasy / Sci-Fi
Concept: After a recently fostered teenager is given magical powers, she embarks on an epic quest to rescue her biological father and save the dragon race from a cruel business mogul who captured them using spells for his financial benefit.
Main Conflict: Lisette must battle Dwyvel to get her father back and save the dragons
2. Fill in each of these with the answers you have right now.
Act 1:
Opening – the story of the jewel told to Lisette as a child.
Inciting Incident – Lisette ends up in an orphanage.
Turning Point – Lisette end up in Dracania.Act 2:
New plan – Lisette’s plan is to find her father and to learn magic to do so.
Plan in action – Lisette studies magic
Midpoint Turning Point – Lisette sees her father torturedAct 3:
Rethink everything. Lisette wants to rescue her father and defeat Dwyvel.
New plan. Lisette is going to bring Dwyvel a dragon scale so he’ll release her father.
Turning Point: The dragons and Lisette’s foster family have all abandoned her. She is by herself with no hope.Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate Expression Of The Conflict: Physical Battle between Lisette and Dwyvel using a special mix of magic and martial arts.
Resolution: Lisette defeats Dwyvel and frees her father and the dragons. She and her father return home with Kismet who has shape-shifted into a human boy.
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This reply was modified 1 year, 8 months ago by Lora Sester.
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I love the combination of Martial Arts, Magic and Dragons combined with a brave female lead, can’t wait to see it!
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Thanks!
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This reply was modified 1 year, 8 months ago by
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Zenna Davis-Jones 4-Act Structure
Note: This is an hour-long television script, so I follow a 5 act structure with a teaser.
What I learned is that the repercussions for my protagonist after the mid-point can be heightened.
A: GENRE – Drama, thriller
B: TITLE – Obedience
C: HIGH CONCEPT: A devout sister must find a way to get her and her fellow sisters to safety after discovering their charming priest is using their congregation to fulfill his own wicked desires.
D: MAIN CONFLICT: Colette discovers father Kinsley has been murdering girls he’s recruited into the congregation, just as she has indoctrinated a bunch of new recruits into the church.
D con’t: MAIN CONFLICT OF EPISODE: Colette’s best friend, Nelly, falls out the window. Colette has to prove it wasn’t suicide to permit her friend a funeral. The guilt Colette feels over her friend’s death causes her to make the congregation look bad and gets her demoted. She must fight to regain her status and God’s love.
TEASER: Little Margot is at the grocery story with her mom when her teddy bear goes missing. She sees a man holding it and follows him. He leads her outside to a river. She ends up drowning. As he drags her body away, she wakes up slightly, he hits her over the head killing her.
ACT 1:
Inciting incident: The new recruits arrive at the church, sister Colette has been given the high honor of teaching them until they take their vows to join the congregation. Despite her excitement, her mute friend Nelly freaks out when the recruits come, they get in a fight.
Turning point:
As sister Colette is showing the new recruits around, her closest friend at the congregation, sister Nelly, falls off the building. When Colette goes over to help her, she discovers a note in Nelly’s hand.
ACT 2:
New Plan:
Kinsley blames Colette for letting negative energies into the building. Colette decides to pursue training the girls harder and whipping herself as punishment to get back into God’s light.
Plan in action:
She gets the biggest secrets from the recruits and relays them to father Kinsley. She whips herself.
Note: As she is whipping herself a rat that Nelly fed keeps on appearing, leading her to believe that this is the devil that possessed Nelly.
Midpoint:
During a big sermon with the townsfolk, Colette kills the rat she believes is the incarnation of the devil.
Act 3:
React/Rethink:
Guards take Colette out of her room in the middle of the night, she is about to be sent away but she begs Kinsley to let her stay.
Colette is demoted to the laundry room for her behavior. She sits in the shame of what she’s done to the congregation. But she learns that Nelly’s death counts as a suicide and therefore she will not receive a funeral. Colette knows in her heart this isn’t true.
New plan:
Colette acts as good as she can, wanting to melt away into a wallflower. She must find a way to clear Nelly’s name.
Turning point:
Colette discovers the second half of Nelly’s note. Together, it leads her to investigate the room Nelly fell from.
**Note: This note/clue can be made stronger
ACT 4:
Climax/Ultimate Expression of the Conflict:
Colette discovers that it was sister Raymond who pushed Nelly out the window. She confronts her to leave the congregation after committing an unforgivable sin.
Push to 5: Colette forces sister Raymond to leave the congregation.
Climax: Colette discovers Kinsley has been killing women.
ACT 5:
Conclusion: Colette uses the next Sunday sermon to raise money in Nelly’s honor, and clears her name. Colette is raised back to her original status.
Twist:
Colette discovers that Nelly had been collecting articles about the murders of girls from the congregation. Father Kinsley has been arrested, and is a suspect for these girls.
Overwhelmed, Colette runs to the forest, where she discovers sister Raymond’s dead body. She now has to watch the new girls take their vows, knowing that this place isn’t safe.
END OF EPISODE
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This is an interesting story and I hadn’t originally realized it was a TV show. I’m confused about both Raymond and Kinsley being killers and how it was discovered. The twist is fantastic!
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Lora! Thanks for reading and offering your insight! Yes, there are more details about Raymond and Kinsley however, I wasn’t sure where to include it in my outline or how many details to give! But I will go over that to make it more clear. Appreciate it!
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Lesson 2
This script is non-linear. Jumps around quite a bit through four decades.
Title: SAY THEIR NAME
Concept: When a young person dies, all they might have accomplished, if they had lived, dies with them.
Conflict: Jim Crow laws get in the way of Moses Kincaid living in peace with his white wife Polly.
ACT ONE – Opening – 2017 Lynching museum – history of racial violence in America.
1967 – Moses at home in Dallas – Just a friendly, regular family man.
– Inciting incident – Neighborhood kid killed in Viêt Nam.
– Turning Point – 1944 – Moses and Polly get married in general store.
ACT TWO – New Plan – 1963 – Moses talks to Civil War Memorial statues – He just wants to live in peace and harmony.
– Plan in action – Moses works hard (elevator repair), served his country in WW2, raises his family. His mother has a vision that he will do great things, but no one will know his name.
– Midpoint Turning Point – 1963 Lee Harvey Oswald point gun at Moses. 1935 Moses meets a biplane pilot who increases his black self awareness. 1946 – Polly is convicted of miscegenation. 1963 – Polly withdraws daughter from piano competition. 1935 – Young Moses falls in love with young Polly.
ACT THREE – React/Rethink – 1967 Moses is more aware of his black culture. Meets with Black Panther in coffee shop. Arrested by FBI. 1935 – loving young Polly is dangerous. Local big shot draws a gun on Moses.
– New plan – 1949 Supreme Court rules that a ban on interracial marriage is unconstitutional. Polly is acquitted. 1935 Young Moses tells his dog how he feels about Polly. 1963 – Moses fights with Oswald. Kennedy is not assassinated.
– Turning point – 1935 Moses is lynched.
ACT FOUR – Climax/ Ultimate expression of Conflict – 1935 Young Moses is dead. 1963 – Polly marries a white doctor. Kennedy is assassinated. Interracial marriage remains illegal until 1967.
– Resolution – 2017 At the Lynching Memorial, Old Polly articulates the high concept.
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This is an absolutely fascinating story. I am still a little confused how his death changed so much but I’m interested enough to want to see it play out.
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Hey everyone! I am wondering if anybody has the sheet with the genre conventions written out?
Thanks!
Zenna
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Zenna, go to your classes page, get into Lesson 3 and scroll down. Immediately under the example “conventions” page, there is tiny red type you can click on to download the complete info on conventions.
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Thank you Deanne! Got it!
Z
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LESSON TWO: Deanne’s 4-Act Structure
What I learned = focus on the through-line (domino line)
Title: COVER BAND
Genre: Horror-Comedy
Concept: New roadies discover band is a front for aliens preparing to invade Earth
Main Conflict: How can they quit the job without getting killed?
Transformational Journey: from “This isn’t my herd, so it is not my problem” to “If we don’t save the world, who will?”
ACT-ONE (The Set-Up)
Opening: establishes genre with isolation, mystery, screams, and blood
Inciting Incident: Antagonist SLICK sees band musician plead with protagonist CB for help
Turning Pt. One: CB makes decision to drive a stowaway MEL to the band’s next concert and ask for a job. (His hidden agenda is to investigate strange things about the band.)
Act-TWO (The Confrontation)
New Plan = abandoning his plan to take a “busman’s holiday,” CB gets a job as horse patrol for the band so he can investigate
Plan in Action = CB takes opportunities to snoop and eavesdrop, quickly running into more than he bargained on
Midpoint = CB loses control of his vehicle and is trapped into continuing with the band indefinitely
Rethink: CB and his friend need to figure out how to quit this job without getting killed
New Plan: CB devises an escape plan, but it fails when a friend becomes a prisoner
Act Two Turning Pt.: CB’s horse is put in danger by the antagonist
Act Three:
Climax = CB’s efforts to save his horse kick off a sequence of action scenes with CB and Champ fighting Slick while danger looms. When it looks like Slick has prevailed, CB turns out to have an ace up his sleeve.
Resolution: tying up many loose ends, CB’s new normal launches him into a life of greater purpose, but THE THREAT STILL REMAINS…-
I really like the transformational journey you presented but it’s a little tough for me to see the arc in your outline.
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Clever concept caught my attention right away – and I thought – I want to see this film!
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What I learned: How to break out the script into four acts and outline the main points in the conflict.
Title: Love and Destiny
Genre: Drama
OUTLINE: LOVE AND DESTINY
Act 1: Opening
Flashback of Past Life with Jean Cobb and her husband John Cobb in Kensington Garden 1863…leads into present day. The Leads are introduced. Victoria and Dennis meet at outdoor faculty event at St. George college. Introduce the idea that the past life and the present life are linked. She is in Theater department he is in English department. Dennis is wearing a wedding ring.
Victoria’s boyfriend, Gary, is introduced as the owner of a Café in town. His father, who plays a big role in the ending is introduced. We find out that the father was in Dachau as a child.
Victoria is at faculty meeting and the idea of the play The Maids being performed is introduced with its potential controversy as characters are men in drag. This sets up the Midpoint which spirals Victoria downward.
Dennis visits Victoria’s classroom as she teaches Romeo and Juliet to a Shakespeare class. The sexual tension between them is heightened.
Sexual tension in Past Life Vision between Jean Cobb and her lover Franklin is intensified.
Victoria sees her friend Sally and tells her about her visions and tries to get her to understand.
The play The Maids is drawing the controversy from a parent of one of the actors…sets up the Midpoint tragedy further.
Inciting Incident: Victoria is in her therapist’s office and reveals her past life visions that are making her crazy. She tells him an old memory from this life and introduces a spiritual/helper figure that visited her as a teenager. Her therapist doesn’t want to deal with past life visions and Victoria realizes TURNING POINT that Dennis is the man she has been seeing in her past life visions and that they are linked karmically.
End Act One
ACT 11
New Plan: Victoria decides to tell Gary about the past life visions in the hope that, as a Buddhist, he can understand what’s happening to her. Instead they argue and she storms out.
Midpoint: Turning point. The controversy over the play The Maids reaches a peak when people are protesting with pickets on her lawn. They say the devil is at St. George college. Actors and faculty have to decide whether to go on with the play. They do and one of the fathers shoots his son when he is on stage in drag, and then kills himself on opening night.
Shaken to the core Victoria turns to Dennis for comfort and tells him about the past life visions she has been having. He reminds her he is married and can’t follow through on their attraction. Before he leaves, however, he kisses her deeply, sending her very mixed messages.
Victoria is in Ted’s office and trying to help her get over her trauma and images. Instead, she has more images in his office this time of Nazi Germany. Ted tries to tell her that the trauma she experienced is fueling these images and they have nothing to do with Nazi Germany.
ACT III
Rethink/React: Victoria is having a terrible time now with all the images and trauma and she reacts by asking her boyfriend Gary to marry her. He refuses because he sees that it is merely a reaction to all she is experiencing. This spirals her down further.
She goes to Gary’s café and sees him flirt with another woman. Her friend Sally meets her here and tells her she is getting married and asks Victoria to be her maid of honor. They both watch Gary flirt with the woman. Victoria can’t watch anymore and she leaves and goes to the park.
While feeding the pigeons in the park a “wise man” spiritual/helper figure sits next to her, like when she was a child, and gives her wise advice and help.
Victoria must launch the Shakespeare play Hamlet and is auditioning students for the role. Dennis walks into theater and sits with her. They laugh and talk until he tells her that he remembered that he wrote a short story in college which mimics her visions of Jean and Franklin as Victorian lovers.
Victoria reads a few telltale lines as the student is performing lines from Hamlet. Dennis gets up and leaves his seat. Victoria is alone holding the pages of his short story.
Victoria goes home, its NIGHT Christmas and pours herself brandy. She grabs her coat and the bottle of brandy and goes outside to walk in the snow.
LOWEST POINT: She walks to Dennis Manon’s house and sees the lights and Christmas tree and people happy inside. She continues onward to main street and plops down on the empty street in front of Gary’s café and drinks more brandy. She staggers to her feet and looks that she has drunk more than half a bottle of brandy. She tries to take her pants down to pee and falls down on the ground. The police come by and arrest her and put her in jail to sober up.
Next day she leaves jail and goes home. Gary arrives to take her to his parent’s house for dinner and wonders why she is so disheveled. Victoria brings up marriage to Gary and his saying NO which sets everybody on edge and makes Gary angry. Their relationship reaches breaking point. Herman talks about being a Jew in Dachau which sets up flashbacks of Victoria to Dachau in her past life.
ACT IV:
Nazi flashbacks – Ted’s office. He tells her she needs a psychiatrist and drugs because she is having a breakdown.
She goes to Gary’s house, walks in on him and the woman he is flirting with having sex. She runs away and goes to her office. Dennis comes to her office and they have sex. She has Nazi flashback when she is having sex with Dennis (a Nazi and she is a Jew in his home at Dachau).
Dennis freaks out that they had sex and leaves.
Theater Arts department meeting to discuss the plays for the next semester. Everyone is nervous because of what happened with The Maids.
Victoria is maid of honor at Sally’s wedding. She wears a gaudy pink poofy dress which contrast with her mood.
As Victoria stands next to the bride and groom the Nazi flashbacks grow worse. She is pregnant with the Nazi’s baby. Tears roll down her face as they say their vows.
Flashback of Nazi’s gunning down children. Sally and her groom take the vows and go up the aisle. As people are leaving Victoria runs from church.
She goes to Ted’s office and tells him she needs to check into a mental hospital for a rest.
Towering Pines: Final flashbacks of her death at Dachau. A janitor comes to her room, but it isn’t a janitor, it’s the spiritual/wise man figure that comes to her when she is at her lowest points. Once again he imparts wisdom to help her get back on her feet.
She goes back home and Dennis comes over and they heal the wounds of their heart. She tells her therapist that she knows that the past lives are real and he tells her she is crazy.
She meets Herman, Gary’s father, and tells him that she too was in Dauchau. When she tells him her story he realizes that they were there together and he tell her that he remembers when the Nazi’s dragged her screaming across the camp and killed her, even though he was a young boy.
Resolution: Victoria quits her job and takes an offer to go to Boston and work in a theater there as a director. She leaves Gary, Dennis and her job behind and starts new with strength and determination having healed her past life karma with Dennis.
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I really like how concrete your plot points are. The ending is also interesting. The only thing I wonder about is the past lives in Nazi Germany – people who have lived through such a trauma might be concerned that someone is claiming this as their own story who hasn’t lived through it in this life.
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Outline to Structure
Learned:
· Rewrite of a scene to make Paul’s action fit his motive vs relying on other characters. Check for other areas like this.
· Can see areas to trim fluff.
· Can see areas to bump up the action.
· Can see areas to rearrange.
Title: Rico Kid
Genre: Coming of Age
Concept: Journey of transformation.
Main Conflict: Paul (12) is bullied by two brothers and threatened by their abusive stepfather, Dalton.
ACT I
Opening: 1970s – Paul (12) chases a lizard in the Utah desert and falls into a cave – darkness – focusses – and faces a charcoaled skull. When he returns to camp, his family members, knowing his fears, prank him with a ghost train.
Inciting Incident: Paul moves with his family to a small Colorado mountain town as the fearful new kid.
Turning Point: Paul’s father Bob, is injured in a mine shaft collapse and can’t provide for his family.
ACT II
New Plan: Paul must navigate his fears and help earn money for his family.
Plan in Action: Paul hustles to make money via a bet with bullies and attempts to sell tourist collectables. He learns new skills from friends and a mentor Charlie (old miner). Charlie teaches him to pan for gold and pays him for cutting wood/stacking wood.
Midpoint Turning Point: Paul’s dog, Sandy is held hostage by bullies as they want payback via a beatdown for Paul and his friends. Their uncle, Dalton demands that they bring Charlie’s treasure map.
ACT III
Rethink everything:
New plan: Becomes a trickster – to outwit the bullies.
Turning Point: Huge failure/major shift: Dalton, after Charlie’s treasure map – throws Paul into a pitch-black mineshaft. All is lost.
ACT IV
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Paul creates a plan that includes school friends and townsfolk that have befriended him. The villains are coxed to the cemetery where Paul incites – inflicts fear, causing them to reveal themselves.
Resolution: Bullies defeated – villains captured – lessons applied. Paul’s love connection consummates with his first awkward kiss (B story). Paul learns that his family is moving once gain to a new town – new challenges to be confronted with new skills.
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I really appreciate how strong and clear your arc is and how much you learned from this exercise.
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Day 2 Four Act Structure
I learned that Selma’s 1<sup>st</sup> intervention needs conflict and Act 3 is too long. I don’t know how to fix them at the moment. It will come to me.
Genre: Drama
Title: The Way Out
Concept: What if a counselor has 6 days to save a woman from a husband who is brainwashing her?
Main Conflict: The counselor is determined that the woman leave her husband; The husband is bent on having her home.
Act 1:
Opening-
Selma throws rose petals into a dumpster. Selma lives alone and trusts no one. Her dying father is in prison.
Inciting Incident-
Selma’s dying father says, “Face your demons.”
Turning Point-
Elizabeth agrees to come for counseling.
Act 2:
New plan-
Selma’s boss explains the plan and says, “Get a good sleep. Tomorrow she’s all yours.”
Plan in action-
Selma begins the 1<sup>st</sup> intervention.
Midpoint Turning Point-
Selma’s lie is discovered.
Act 3
Rethink everything-
Selma must win Elizabeth back if she decides to show up.
New Plan-
Selma apologizes profusely and stops pushing Elizabeth.
Turning Point: Huge Failure/ Major Shift-
Elizabeth decides to go home.
Act 4:
Climax/ Ultimate Expression of the Conflict-
Selma does a totally different kind of intervention. Up until now, she has used logic. Instead, she uses emotion.
Selma and Elizabeth must fight Mark when he tries to kidnap Elizabeth at gunpoint.
Resolution-
Selma and her boss become a surrogate daughter/mother for each other. They have dinner in Selma’s apartment.
Selma accepts that her father was responsible for her mother’s death. Selma burns a box of her father’s possessions.
Selma and Elizabeth become friends. They create a worldwide self-help organization for survivors of domestic abuse.
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I am very curious about your story and would like to know more. What prompts Elizabeth into counseling? Where is the husband in acts 1-3?
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Day 2:
James’ 4 Act Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is by using the pitch to focus on as I brainstorm different possible beats for the structure allows the options that I generate to be consistent with the vision of the story I’m trying to tell; most if not all options will be in the “ballpark” of what I’m searching for and therefore saves me time as well.
List the beats of your 4 Act Transformational Structure.
1. Give us the following:
Title: The Toy of My Life or Love and Toys Chronicles or Love and Toys
Genre: Romantic Comedy
Main Conflict: both the love interests must overcome their pasts in order to make their relationship successful.
2. Fill in each of these with the answers you have right now.
Opening: Jessica Blue and her boss, Bart Hillman, are introduced. They have a contentious relationship.
Inciting Incident: Jessica’s demands are not met and she quits her job much to Bart’s shock; he’s left in complete awe.
Alternative Inciting Incident: Jessica and Rufus get stuck in an elevator together and create a friendly acquaintance that leads to more meetings.
Turning Point: Rufus proposes Jessica a job offer to help with the development of a project he’s been mulling over for months.
Act 2:
New plan: Jessica intends to entertain Rufus’ job offer to see where it leads while still fulfilling the needs as a sex toys representative.
Plan in action: Jessica meets with Rufus and gains a better understanding of the project he wants to develop and simultaneously visits her customers with their special orders.
Midpoint Turning Point: Rufus walks in on Jessica surprising her and sees all the sex products; he assumes the worst which she tries to explain. A rift is created between them.
Act 3:
Rethink everything: Jessica leaves her sex toys jobs and pursues her goal in becoming her own boss; this is in reaction to Rufus walking out on her without an explanation.
New plan: Jessica intends to use her customer base to launch and grow a podcast then to build a following that will ultimately serve as patrons for her boutique.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift: Jessica is caught in a compromising position by Rufus and he again believes the worst. He storms out without listening to an explanation; a major rift has emerged.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict: Jessica offers parting words that affect Rufus deeply having him realize she’s the one for him; the power of her words permeates across the country and are felt.
Alternative Climax: Jessica and Rufus attend a dinner hosted by one of his friends, but an old colleague of hers catches up to her at the event and causes chaos.
Resolution: Jessica receives word that Francine has passed and is given a letter delivered by Angie. The letter is Francine’s wish for Jessica to find and forever to hold on to the love of her life (Rufus).
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I like “Love and Toys”
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Bill Curley LessGone. Learned: Proper, correct structure makes for a great story and script. Genre: Sci Fi and Thriller. Title: “Cane”. High Concept: The story revolves around a university professor,s announcement of a massive cover up of Global Warming 55 years ago. ……… .. …. Opening; A Navy captain asks a prof what he learned performing open ocean research. The reply is foreboding. Record warm ocean temps spell imminent doom. … Inciting Incident: The prof calls his two graduate students to a sudden meeting on campus. He will announce a bombshell. Key Incident: Prof gathers all at what looks like a routine lecture. It is not. Prof announces a cover up of Global Warming and the possibility of a massive hurricane. Key Incident: The announcement is made. A deranged oil exec plans prof,s death. Midpoint: While disclosing a climate cover up with a reporter, prof,s condo is smashed by five assasins. Act 3 to 4. Low Point. The prof just survived a murder attempt on his life. Now stalked. Storm has developed as suspected. 17 hours to evacuate FL. Act 4. “Cane” has come and departed. The climate is now flipping to a Mesozoic ” hot house” not seen on planet Earth in 70 million years. Resolution: All characters stand next to a couple military Humvees on a devastated I 95. They stare in horror. The freeway runs into an open ocean. Florida is gone.
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I like your outline and think you have an interesting story. It is a bit hard to follow in its current format.
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Ed Etzkorn’s Structure
What I learned: How to think of movie structure as a 4-act whole. Still find this difficult.
Title: Home with a Past
Genre: Horror
Concept: A teenage girl must deal with the demands of a hostile Entity in her new home even as she relives the dying moments of children from around the world, while trying to convince friends she’s not a witch and parents she’s not psychotic.
Main Conflict: Teenager vs. hostile and unknown entity.
4-Act Structure:
Act 1:
Enter new home, aware it has a
past history of some tragic incident that happened there
Unexplained vision, invisible
footsteps, frightening sound; Azuri’s unexplained acute anxiety reaction
Investigate other homes sold
with same history; consult old people in neighboring house; another
similar, but more frightening incident occursAct 2:
Finally makes contact with the
entity, but it raises more questions than it solves. Entity ups the ante;
pushes mom down cellar stairs
Azuri blamed for her mom; more
episodes of experiencing kids’ dying thoughts; more desperate efforts to
find who the entity was in life and what it wants
Attempt to kill or severely
wound Azuri. Friends turn against her, think she’s a witch; parents think
she’s having mental breakdownAct 3:
More information from old
folks; prod real-estate agent for more history, visit last house with a
past
More extreme experience of
violent thoughts of teen who killed his father; entity attacks mom again; garage
burns when only Azuri is home. Both parents now fully blame Azuri and want
to send her away
Almost out of control, Azuri
runs away, no longer knows whom to turn to.Act 4:
Azuri desperately contacts
entity, finds she and the entity have much in common. House begins to burn
as Azuri is asleep alone upstairs. Final discussion with entity as Azuri
breathes in smoke, falls into a coma
Resolution: The entity sees
itself in Azuri, saves her from the fire by carrying her outside the house
to safety. Azuri experiences thee entity’s last dying thoughts as it
passes on into death.-
This is interesting. What do <font face=”inherit”>Azuri and the entity have in common? You’ve piqued my </font>curiosity.
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Thank you so much, Lora!
Your comment is so a propos! It has helped me realize that one of the main things missing in my script is a stronger role for the antagonist. In the current version of the script, Azuri does not realize who she is until near the end. The girls need to be learning more about each other as the script progresses so the ending will be that much more meaningful. You’ve really helped me with a breakthrough!
Ed
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That’s awesome! 🙂
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Jonathan Clark’s 4 Act Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is…
Focusing more on the conspiracy and thriller elements really gives my story direction and heft. Biggest difficulty now will be seamlessly cramming all the backstory into Act 1. Without it, in its original incarnation, the story just fell flat. I need the emotional payoffs to hit hard in later Acts. It’s the seemingly small details in this story that will pack the most punch.
Title: Saving Mona
Genre: Crime Thriller
Concept: Inspired by actual events, this is the story of Vincenzo Peruggia and the conspiracy that overwhelmed him when he stole the Mona Lisa back in 1911, and how, in the end, he actually got away with his crime.
Main Conflict: Forced to be a serious grifter, selling forgeries of the Mona Lisa, Vincenzo meets the love of his life, a woman who’s already, and unwillingly, become engaged to the powerful and heartless Count Eduardo De Valfierno, head of the gang that’s got Vincenzo in its grip.
Act 1:
Opening
In order not to be prosecuted, an old Frenchman, Yves Chaudron, tells unseen interviewers the story of Vincenzo Peruggia. In V.O., he starts with Vincenzo already in jail in 1913. When the Mona Lisa is displayed in a crammed courtroom, the volatile crowd goes nuts, and the Lead Judge bangs his gavel, yelling at Vincenzo to explain why he did it. Arguing with his interrogators, Old Chaudron then reflects back on Vincenzo’s childhood, and the childhood of his own daughter, Italia Chaudron. It’s the only way the Interrogators will understand.
Inciting Incident
10 year old Vincenzo’s father is killed in a way that makes Vincenzo feel guilty, and Italia’s mother dies of TB.
This leads to: Vincenzo’s mother being thrown into debtor’s prison, where she dies of rat bites, and Vincenzo escaping a horrible, Church-run, claustrophobic orphanage. Vincenzo ends up living on the streets, where he gets on the wrong side of a powerful gang, which is why Vincenzo leaves Italy to settle in Paris.
Italia, meanwhile, is given her mother’s pearls so she can remember her always and know she is loved.
Turning Point
Years later, Vincenzo’s living a mundane, pointless life. Until, working at the Louvre, Vincenzo witnesses a swarm of radical Impressionists trying to destroy Classic Paintings with acid (this stuff actually happened). Vincenzo steals the Mona Lisa to save her. But then, soon after, the Mona Lisa simply vanishes from his home. Vincenzo becomes paranoid, sure he’s being watched. After a year, Mona strangely re-appears, propped up on his table at home. There’s a note with her, telling Vincenzo to quit his job and bring Mona back to Italy. Or else.
Act 2:
New plan
On the train to Florence, Italy, Vincenzo’s forced to sell a fake Mona to a wealthy American. He realizes a gang member he once cut, Castigione, is the person behind the fraud. Arriving in Florence in wild circumstances that involve an Art Dealer, Arthur Gelli, and in the middle of a Nationalist Parade (historically, this is just after the Italian-Turkish War), Vincenzo literally slams into Italia, Yves Chaudron’s daughter. After breaking into her room to talk to her, Vincenzo is nearly killed by house Servants. Unknown to everyone, Italia is sick, coughing blood into her pillow.
Plan in action
Caught by the very powerful Count Edwardo De Valfierno, Italia’s fiance and Castigione’s boss, Vincenzo is given new instructions for another fraud. De Valfierno tells Castigione to kill Vincenzo once Vincenzo’s usefulness has expired… after two more frauds. Vincenzo realizes his wooden case, with the Mona Lisa in it, has vanished. After tracking down his badly battered case, he breaks into the Uffizi Museum to fix his case, and the damaged Mona, but gets locked in.
Midpoint Turning Point
Thrown in jail, Vincenzo can’t handle it, nearly melts down. Castigione bails him out. Tells him Italia has run off. Vincenzo better not be the reason.
Act 3:
Rethink everything
Based on their prior conversation, Vincenzo figures out where Italia’s gone. He and Italia spend the day together in the countryside, swimming, but when things turn sexual, Vincenzo refuses Italia’s advances because they aren’t married. Italia tries to marry him before God with a blade of grass as a ring. Returning to his apartment, Vincenzo is questioned by Detectives about the Mona theft, all while Mona is right there under the tablecloth.
New plan
Vincenzo tries to destroy Mona by dropping her in the Arno River, but just can’t do it. He slinks back to De Valfierno and the next big fraud. Soon after, he can’t help himself and breaks into Italia’s house. Sees dozens of fake Mona Lisas. Finds Italia in her room and realizes how sick she actually is. Caught by Miss Fortuna, Italia’s overbearing chaperone, Vincenzo leaves peacefully after professing his love for Italia. With money in his pocket from the fraud, though, the next day he buys himself a new suit and goes to Chaudron’s house to ask for Italia’s hand in marriage. He just knows they’re Fated to be together.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift
But it’s too late. Italia’s getting married that day to De Valfierno. Vincenzo races to the ceremony at the Duomo, but the deed is done. Vincenzo buys a trumpet, one Italia’s wanted, as a wedding present. Vincenzo leaves her the trumpet… and the case with the Mona Lisa. Leaves a note for her to meet him at the train station so they can run away together if she so desires. At the station, however, a Servant brings a note from Italia telling Vincenzo to go back to Paris, he’s not wanted. The servant also returns the trumpet. Completely dejected, Vincenzo boards the train. But just as the train leaves Florence, Vincenzo finds in the trumpet Italia’s pearl necklace, the one she got from her mother, and realizes Italia does love him. But Castigione and De Valfierno are on the train. It’s a set up. They want Vincenzo to sell another Mona Lisa to a contingent of Turks! It all goes wrong, and Vincenzo barely survives as he leaps from the train. Castigione is mortally injured when he’s thrown from the train by De Valfierno to kill Vincenzo. Vincenzo tries to save Castigione, but can’t. Just before dying, Castigione tells Vincenzo to kill De Valfierno for him, and steal back Italia. Vincenzo promises he will.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict
With his last bit of cash, Vincenzo manages to get a very fast drive all the way back to Italia’s house. He breaks in, gets to Italia. She’s not doing well. All she’s been able to do is constantly throw her wedding ring away before it’s put back on her finger. De Valfierno arrives and hunts down Vincenzo, shooting Vincenzo. Vincenzo barely escapes with the real Mona Lisa, thanks to a Servant. Vincenzo then brings Mona to the nearby Art Dealer, Arthur Gelli, who immediately creates a stir, yelling out on the street for Carabinieri (Italian Police) to arrest Vincenzo. Vincenzo arrives back in front of Italia’s house, taunting De Valfierno, telling him all the powerful people he defrauded will now have De Valfierno killed. Seething, De Valfierno pushes Italia back, points his gun at Vincenzo from Italia’s window as Carabinieri swarm toward Vincenzo. But before De Valfierno can kill Vincenzo, De Valfierno himself is killed with a sharp-ended homemade paintbrush in the hands of Italia’s overbearing chaperone, Miss Fortuna. Vincenzo is dragged away as Italia screams for him.
Resolution
Back in the courtroom from the Opening Scene, the Lead Judge bangs his gavel, yelling at Vincenzo to explain why he did it. And as the crowd, many of whom we now recognize from all the Pro-Italy Nationalist Parades that Vincenzo encountered all through his stay in Florence, finally hush, Vincenzo raises his eyes, looks at everyone, and says: ‘I did it for Italia.’ It takes a moment, but the fervor of the Nationalist crowd is suddenly and absolutely explosive. Old Chaudron, still being interviewed, explains that Vincenzo was basically set free as an Italian hero. And when Vincenzo’s released from jail, Italia, worse for wear, but alive, is waiting for him. She had something to live for. Without a word, Vincenzo kneels down, plucks up some tall grass, and wraps it around her finger like a wedding ring. With the interview now done, Old Chaudron leaves. The interrogators are all characters we’ve seen before: Giovanni Poggi, head of the Uffizi, Arthur Gelli the art dealer, the Detectives from Vincenzo’s room. They wonder if Chaudron actually told them the truth. Meanwhile, Old Chaudron heads home, where we now see many of the characters from the story, including Italia and Vincenzo. Chaudron tells them all it went well. He then heads down to a small room off the wine cellar that we’ve seen before, locks the door behind him, and sits down with a glass of wine. He pops a hidden lever, and the wall springs open to reveal: the Real Mona Lisa, the one with the telltale marks on the edge where Vincenzo fixed it.
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This is incredibly complex and thought out. There are so many beats here and it all comes together nicely. Curious how long your script is.
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Hi Lora, yes, been scratching around in my head for a while. The original script came in at 120 pages, so a bit on the long side. A lot of that has been thrown out. Now it’s about pushing through with a new version at an accelerated pace. You’re right, keeping the script within a reasonable page count is going to be a real challenge, especially in Act 1. I’ll have to commit to it being under 120 total!! You’re absolutely right to point that out! Thank you, Lora!
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Jonathan Clark’s 4 Act Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is…
Focusing more on the conspiracy and thriller elements really gives this story direction and heft. Biggest difficulty now will be seamlessly cramming all the backstory into Act 1. Without it, in its original incarnation, the story just fell flat. I need the emotional payoffs to hit hard in later Acts. It’s the seemingly small details in this story that will pack the most punch.
Title: Saving Mona
Genre: Crime Thriller
Concept: Inspired by actual events, this is the story of Vincenzo Peruggia and the conspiracy that overwhelmed him when he stole the Mona Lisa back in 1911, and how, in the end, he actually got away with his crime.
Main Conflict: Forced to be a serious grifter, selling forgeries of the Mona Lisa, Vincenzo meets the love of his life, a woman who’s already become engaged, unwillingly, to the powerful and heartless Count Eduardo De Valfierno, head of the gang that’s got Vincenzo in its grip.
Act 1:
Opening
In order not to be prosecuted, an old Frenchman, Yves Chaudron, tells unseen interviewers the story of Vincenzo Peruggia. In V.O., he starts with Vincenzo already in jail in 1913. When the Mona Lisa is displayed in a crammed courtroom, the volatile crowd goes nuts, and the Lead Judge bangs his gavel, yelling at Vincenzo to explain why he did it. Arguing with his interrogators, Old Chaudron then reflects back on Vincenzo’s childhood, and the childhood of his own daughter, Italia Chaudron. It’s the only way the Interrogators will understand.
Inciting Incident
10 year old Vincenzo’s father is killed in a way that makes Vincenzo feel guilty, and Italia’s mother dies of TB.
This leads to: Vincenzo’s mother being thrown into debtor’s prison, where she dies of rat bites, and Vincenzo escaping a horrible, Church-run, claustrophobic orphanage. Vincenzo ends up living on the streets, where he gets on the wrong side of a powerful gang, which is why Vincenzo leaves Italy to settle in Paris.
Italia, meanwhile, is given her mother’s pearls so she can remember her always and know she is loved.
Turning Point
Years later, Vincenzo’s living a mundane, pointless life. Until, working at the Louvre, Vincenzo witnesses a swarm of radical Impressionists trying to destroy Classic Paintings with acid (this stuff actually happened). Vincenzo steals the Mona Lisa to save her. But then, soon after, the Mona Lisa simply vanishes from his home. Vincenzo becomes paranoid, sure he’s being watched. After a year, Mona strangely re-appears, propped up on his table at home. There’s a note with her, telling Vincenzo to quit his job and bring Mona back to Italy. Or else.
Act 2:
New plan
On the train to Florence, Italy, Vincenzo’s forced to sell a fake Mona to a wealthy American. He realizes a gang member he once cut, Castigione, is the person behind the fraud. Arriving in Florence in wild circumstances that involve an Art Dealer, Arthur Gelli, and in the middle of a Nationalist Parade (historically, this is just after the Italian-Turkish War), Vincenzo literally slams into Italia, Yves Chaudron’s daughter. After breaking into her room to talk to her, Vincenzo is nearly killed by house Servants. Unknown to everyone, Italia is sick, coughing blood into her pillow.
Plan in action
Caught by the very powerful Count Edwardo De Valfierno, Italia’s fiance and Castigione’s boss, Vincenzo is given new instructions for another fraud. De Valfierno tells Castigione to kill Vincenzo once Vincenzo’s usefulness has expired… after two more frauds. Vincenzo realizes his wooden case, with the Mona Lisa in it, has vanished. After tracking down his badly battered case, he breaks into the Uffizi Museum to fix his case, and the damaged Mona, but gets locked in.
Midpoint Turning Point
Thrown in jail, Vincenzo can’t handle it, nearly melts down. Castigione bails him out. Tells him Italia has run off. Vincenzo better not be the reason.
Act 3:
Rethink everything
Based on their prior conversation, Vincenzo figures out where Italia’s gone. He and Italia spend the day together in the countryside, swimming, but when things turn sexual, Vincenzo refuses Italia’s advances because they aren’t married. Italia tries to marry him before God with a blade of grass as a ring. Returning to his apartment, Vincenzo is questioned by Detectives about the Mona theft, all while Mona is right there under the tablecloth.
New plan
Vincenzo tries to destroy Mona by dropping her in the Arno River, but just can’t do it. He slinks back to De Valfierno and the next big fraud. Soon after, he can’t help himself and breaks into Italia’s house. Sees dozens of fake Mona Lisas. Finds Italia in her room and realizes how sick she actually is. Caught by Miss Fortuna, Italia’s overbearing chaperone, Vincenzo leaves peacefully after professing his love for Italia. With money in his pocket from the fraud, though, the next day he buys himself a new suit and goes to Chaudron’s house to ask for Italia’s hand in marriage. He just knows they’re Fated to be together.
Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift
But it’s too late. Italia’s getting married that day to De Valfierno. Vincenzo races to the ceremony at the Duomo, but the deed is done. Vincenzo buys a trumpet, one Italia’s wanted, as a wedding present. Vincenzo leaves her the trumpet… and the case with the Mona Lisa. Leaves a note for her to meet him at the train station so they can run away together if she so desires. At the station, however, a Servant brings a note from Italia telling Vincenzo to go back to Paris, he’s not wanted. The servant also returns the trumpet. Completely dejected, Vincenzo boards the train. But just as the train leaves Florence, Vincenzo finds in the trumpet Italia’s pearl necklace, the one she got from her mother, and realizes Italia does love him. But Castigione and De Valfierno are on the train. It’s a set up. They want Vincenzo to sell another Mona Lisa to a contingent of Turks! It all goes wrong, and Vincenzo barely survives as he leaps from the train. Castigione is mortally injured when he’s thrown from the train by De Valfierno to kill Vincenzo. Vincenzo tries to save Castigione, but can’t. Just before dying, Castigione tells Vincenzo to kill De Valfierno for him, and steal back Italia. Vincenzo promises he will.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict
With his last bit of cash, Vincenzo manages to get a very fast drive all the way back to Italia’s house. He breaks in, gets to Italia. She’s not doing well. All she’s been able to do is constantly throw her wedding ring away before it’s put back on her finger. De Valfierno arrives and hunts down Vincenzo, shooting Vincenzo. Vincenzo barely escapes with the real Mona Lisa, thanks to a Servant. Vincenzo then brings Mona to the nearby Art Dealer, Arthur Gelli, who immediately creates a stir, yelling out on the street for Carabinieri (Italian Police) to arrest Vincenzo. Vincenzo arrives back in front of Italia’s house, taunting De Valfierno, telling him all the powerful people he defrauded will now have De Valfierno killed. Seething, De Valfierno pushes Italia back, points his gun at Vincenzo from Italia’s window as Carabinieri swarm toward Vincenzo. But before De Valfierno can kill Vincenzo, De Valfierno himself is killed with a sharp-ended homemade paintbrush in the hands of Italia’s overbearing chaperone, Miss Fortuna. Vincenzo is dragged away as Italia screams for him.
Resolution
Back in the courtroom from the Opening Scene, the Lead Judge bangs his gavel, yelling at Vincenzo to explain why he did it. And as the crowd, many of whom we now recognize from all the Pro-Italy Nationalist Parades that Vincenzo encountered all through his stay in Florence, finally hush, Vincenzo raises his eyes, looks at everyone, and says: ‘I did it for Italia.’ It takes a moment, but the fervor of the Nationalist crowd is suddenly and absolutely explosive. Old Chaudron, still being interviewed, explains that Vincenzo was basically set free as an Italian hero. And when Vincenzo’s released from jail, Italia, worse for wear, but alive, is waiting for him. She had something to live for. Without a word, Vincenzo kneels down, plucks up some tall grass, and wraps it around her finger like a wedding ring. With the interview now done, Old Chaudron leaves. The interrogators are all characters we’ve seen before: Giovanni Poggi, head of the Uffizi, Arthur Gelli the art dealer, the Detectives from Vincenzo’s room. They wonder if Chaudron actually told them the truth. Meanwhile, Old Chaudron heads home, where we now see many of the characters from the story, including Italia and Vincenzo. Chaudron tells them all it went well. He then heads down to a small room off the wine cellar that we’ve seen before, locks the door behind him, and sits down with a glass of wine. He pops a hidden lever, and the wall springs open to reveal: the Real Mona Lisa, the one with the telltale marks on the edge where Vincenzo fixed it.
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