Lesson 21

[Blair Marino]

Blair's Reveals
What I learned doing this assignment was: creating reveals in scenes can add layers of interest for audience members.
Logline: A visit with the school principal turns south quickly as Kyle digs for answers to why Chelsea continues to be bullied.
Used the Demand/ Cover up/Reveal structure
Scene:
INT. ADMINISTRATORS OFFICE – MOMENTS LATER

Kyle opens the door to the office and walks to the receptionist's desk. The receptionist looks at Kyle.

RECEPTIONIST
May I help you?

KYLE
Yes, I am Kyle Walker here to see Dr. Adams.

RECEPTIONIST
Dr. Adams is finishing up a call. I will let her know you're here.

KYLE
Thank you.

The receptionist leaves the room. Kyle sits down in a chair nearby. He grabs a magazine next to him and flips the pages. Dr. Adams comes out of her office. She is black and in her late forties.

DR. ADAMS
Mr. Walker?

Kyle stands up.

KYLE
Yes.

Dr. Adams extends her hand to shake Kyle's hand.

DR. ADAMS
Please come into my office.

INT. DR. ADAMS' OFFICE – CONTINUOUS

They both walk into the office and Dr. Adams closes the door.

DR. ADAMS
Have a seat.

She gestures to a chair and Kyle sits down. Dr. Adams sits down at her desk.

DR. ADAMS
I apologize for having to call you in like this. Chelsea is with the school nurse right now. She seems to have calmed down some, but she was having a hard time with her head jerking tic during class. Ms. Wright thought that Chelsea was having a tic attack and she alerted the school nurse.

KYLE
Can I see Chelsea?

DR. ADAMS
Yes, the nurse knows you're here and will bring her in.

KYLE
Okay.

Kyle glances around the room.

KYLE
Chelsea's tics have become more frequent and severe since the accident.

DR. ADAMS
Yes, I understand. I know that Chelsea's been through a lot.

There is a knock on the door.

DR. ADAMS
Come in.

The school nurse and Chelsea come into the office. Chelsea looks upset when she sees Kyle.

CHELSEA
Hi.

Dr. Adams looks at the nurse.

DR. ADAMS
Thank you, Rita.

Rita leaves and closes the door behind her. Chelsea sits down in a chair next to Kyle.

DR. ADAMS
Chelsea, I called your Dad in because we are concerned about what happened today in class.

Chelsea avoids eye contact with Dr. Adams.

CHELSEA
Am I in trouble?

KYLE
No, Sweetheart. We want to help you with your tics when you have a tic attack.

CHELSEA
I don't know why I couldn't stop jerking my head. I tried. Some of the kids were laughing at me and making fun of my tics.

KYLE
I'm sorry, honey.

Kyle looks at Dr. Adams.

KYLE
Would it be okay if I talked to you alone for a minute?

DR. ADAMS
Yes, of course.

KYLE
Thank you.

Kyle looks at Chelsea.

KYLE
Sweetie, would you mind sitting outside for a few minutes while I speak to Dr. Adams?

Chelsea nods and exits the office.

KYLE
Chelsea tells me that some of the children in her class continually tease her when she tics.

DR. ADAMS
(interrupting)
Ms. Wright is doing all that she can to help Chelsea.

KYLE
I understand, but the teasing has gotten worse this past week. I really think Chelsea is absolutely entitled to an IEP now with her increased tics in the classroom.

DR. ADAMS
Yes, I agree. I will initiate the eligibly requirements with Ms. Wright. I will also need to receive your request in writing as soon as possible. Please understand that since we are almost finished with the school year, Chelsea may not be able to have accommodations until next year.

KYLE
Okay. As you know, I already wrote a request for an IEP at the beginning of the year and was denied. Why do I need to make another request?

DR. ADAMS
It needs to be a separate request.

KYLE
Fine. In terms of eligibility, I hope you fully understand Chelsea's predicament at this time. Her increasing tics have put a target on her back.

DR. ADAMS
Mr. Walker, We have a zero tolerance policy for bullying and there are disciplinary actions in place for violations.

KYLE
Have the children in Chelsea's class been disciplined?

DR. ADAMS
Do you think Chelsea is being bullied?

KYLE
Why are you answering my question with a question? Yes, I think she is being bullied. What has Ms. Wright done about the bullying in her class?

DR. ADAMS
I will have to ask Ms. Wright that.

KYLE
Wait. You don't know? You just said that the school has a zero tolerance policy. If that's the case, why would you need to ask Ms. Wright if she has disciplined anyone?

DR. ADAMS
Mr. Walker, this is a large school with many teachers. I can't know everything that goes on in each of our classrooms.

KYLE
(sarcastically)
Well, that's reassuring.

Kyle opens the office door and motions for Chelsea to come with him.

KYLE
I'm taking Chelsea home now. Perhaps you should check in with Ms. Wright and find out what she's doing about the bullying in her class.

Kyle and Chelsea walk out of the office.

[Deb Johnson]

Deb Reveals…

What I learned… a reveal has three components, the current situation/cover up, the demand, and then the reveal. The final reveal sends the story in a new direction.

Logline: Mama Lee takes a fall down a flight of stairs. When Lisa and Gabe rush to her aid, secrets are revealed, and animal instincts take over.

Scene:

INT. VANCE’S STUDY – NIGHT

Gabe and Lisa glare at each other.

GABE Don’t worry, you’ll never see me again.

LISA You can’t go. Not this way.

From above they hear a sharp GASP followed by a THUD – then a rapid series of harsh, rhythmic THUMPS and desperate SHRIEKS ending in a final CRASH… then silence.

GABE Mama Lee.

They rush out.

INT. BOTTOM OF THE STAIRS – NIGHT

Mama Lee lays on her back. She MOANS and attempts to rise. Scattered about: an empty box and children's memorabilia.

LISA Mama Lee! Dear god!

Lisa runs to her side.

MAMA LEE Help me up.

GABE No! Don’t move her. Lisa, call an ambulance.

Lisa takes her phone out and calls.

MAMA LEE Don’t be silly. I’m fine. I just landed in a puddle or something.

Gabe examines Mama Lee. She lies in a puddle of blood that grows. Her back is impaled by the sharp edge of raw amethyst paperweight. Lisa hangs up.

LISA They’re coming. Dear lord!

She kneels next to Mama Lee and looks at Gabe. His eyes are grim as he slowly shakes his head. Lisa sees the blood.

LISA What happened?

MAMA LEE I was bringing that box down and must have tripped. I feel like I’m slipping.

LISA What can we do?

GABE Everything is going to be okay. I don’t want to move her an inch.

LISA Mama Lee. I’m so sorry.

Mama Lee groans. Her face is pale. She’s fading.

MAMA LEE Sorry for what child? Is there something you want to confess?

GABE (to Lisa) Leave her alone.

LISA (to Gabe) This is my chance to come clean. God wants me to do it. (to Mama Lee) Mama Lee. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I… Vance and I… we…

MAMA LEE Go ahead and say it.

LISA Vance and I, we were together. For many years.

Mama Lee’s face is pained and angry.

MAMA LEE Why tell me now? You don’t think I knew?

Gabe is shocked.

LISA You knew?

MAMA LEE Gabe, honey, I think I’m dying.

GABE
If I thought you were dying, you know I’d record it.

They watch Mama Lee reach down to the gun holster on her leg. She slowly retrieves her small pistol.

MAMA LEE Vance gave me this to keep me safe. Never used it…. Just kept it for security, I guess. Never thought I’d end this way.

LISA Mama Lee, don’t talk like that. Help is on the way.

MAMA LEE You shut up. You just shut your mouth. The years I suffered with you two sneaking around behind my back. Everyone knowing about it. I played dumb because I had to keep my home. I had to keep my dignity.

LISA It wasn’t my fault! It was Vance! He was relentless. He wouldn’t let me go.

MAMA LEE It takes two, child. It takes two.

LISA Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?

BANG. Mama Lee shoots Lisa. Lisa, stunned, falls back against the wall. Gabe is aghast.

MAMA LEE No.

BANG. She shoots her again. Lisa looks at her wounds, confused.

LISA Perhaps this is how it was always meant to end.

Gabe looks at Lisa in astonishment and is overcome by fear. Mama Lee wheezes and points the gun at Gabe.

MAMA LEE Do I kill the only witness to my madness?

Gabe calmly takes the gun from her.

Mama Lee closes her eyes. Lisa lies still, her eyes wide open.

MAMA LEE Gabe, the typewriter; you should know we were all in on it. Even I knew.

GABE Mama Lee don’t say another word.

MAMA LEE This is no ruse.

Gabe is alarmed and frightened. Mama Lee passes out. The sound of AMBULANCE SIRENS. Gabe looks at the gun in his hand. From the window he can see the ambulance pull up. He looks around, not sure what to do.

[Firdaus Bilimoria]

Firdaus F Bilimoria – LESSON 21 EXERCISE

What I learned doing this assignment was using the Reveal Model to move the narrative arc.

SCENE:
INT. BOARDROOM, DAY Its a boardroom with glass paneled walls. MANNING, 40s, senior executive in suit is at head of table. HARRY, LYNETTE, BRIAN, and PHIL, JAMES, and ZOE flank Manning at the table to his right and left sides respectively. The seat at Manning’s left is empty. PHIL sits at the far end of the table, appearing detached from the rest of the crowd.
ALEJANDRO enters and sits next to Manning.

ALEJANDRO
Sorry everyone, got tied up in the traffic.

MANNING
(deferential)
Thanks for coming.

HARRY
(ingratiating)
Glad you could make it it, Alejandro.

LYNETTE
We were just congratulating Harry on his promotion.
(side glance at Phil)
At least most of us were.

ALEJANDRO
Congratulations Harry.

HARRY
Thank you! I look forward to working with you and your team. Together we can deliver some real value to the organization.

ALEJANDRO
Yes yes.

Alejandro glances towards Phil who is leaning back and staring ahead. Alejandro shares a fleeting look with Manning.

MANNING
So we wanted to meet Alejandro and talk some next steps. We have achieved a lot over the last six months in the new strategy.

ALEJANDRO
Yes we have. The results have been gratifying so far.

HARRY
It was a group effort, great team work everyone.

LYNETTE
Yes it was great team work!

Everyone smiles except for Phil.

HARRY
So what’s next Alejandro?

AlEJANDRO
We have to continue on the momentum with our groups working together.

HARRY
We welcome that, we really did some groundbreaking work over the last year.

MANNING
The whole group contributed mightily.

Phil is doodling on his notepad. Manning glances at him. Alejandro glances at Phil, then exchanges a look with Manning.

HARRY
Our whole group is committed to this, Alejandro! You can rely on us!

ALEJANDRO
(unenthused)
Yes yes.

HARRY
We have a presentation for you. Lynette, do you want to start the slide deck on the screen?

LYNETTE
Yes, Harry.

Lynette works on her PC and looks at the TV screen. Alejandro leans over to Manning.

ALEJANDRO
(sotto voice)
You promoted the wrong guy. No matter your personal feelings, we need Phil’s expertise. This was his original vision.

MANNING
He has nowhere to go. He’ll come around.

ALEJANDRO
I hope so.

LYNETTE
Ok folks, here is our take on the future state.

Phil is not watching the screen. He picks up his phone and types a text: “Is the job offer still open?” He hits SEND.

• This reply was modified 8 months, 2 weeks ago by  Firdaus Bilimoria.