-
Lesson 4
Reply to post your work
-
5 Replies
-
Joan Beesley: 10 Most Interesting Things
What I learned from this assignment is while I have many hooks, I see them much more clearly. I am now doing a rewrite and can “sharpen” what I now see to be” hooks”.
Secondly I’ve had a breakthrough. In thinking of his business partner as “villain’, I see that the hero actually inadvertently helped turn his partner into the villain who takes over his business by having his own sons “defer” their creative ideas to the villain’s son or principals in the business. Interesting in that the protagonist helped create his nemesis!
1. Specific Hooks
A. Most Unique About Villain and Hero
Hero Michael Flynn rises from destitute 3 year old Irish immigrant to scrap metal czar and how he got there: his deal-making talent, “opportunities” through Tammany Hall associations and Democratic Ward 6 leaders and later senators. Achilles heal is his inability to teach his sons the art of his deal-making talent. He is more focused on insulating his family from his childhood poverty by accumulating wealth and prestige in Brooklyn political and society circles.
Villain is the poor Jewish immigrant Hero invites to become his partner after they meet at Triangle Shirtwaist Fire. An electrician who becomes a talented expert in metals, he and his son “steal” the business from the Hero’s son who is the unwitting president of the company in 1957.
B. Major Hook
Late 1920’s. 7 year old grandson is being taught to count pennies accurately by his elderly, cranky grandfather, Michael Flynn. Impatient to go play stickball with his friends, he sees a large bronze plaque in a corner, a retirement award from his grandfather’s company and asks his grandfather to tell the story of the business.
C. Turning Points
Flynn cottage is “toppled” by British soldiers and they flee Ireland for New York.
Michael Flynn’s father recognizes the value of the ropes left behind by the immigrant coffin ships.
MF dies in 1942, leaving the business to be run by his sons.
Business is stealthy “bought out” in 1957.
MF “returns” to save author of his biography (great grand-daughter’s) life in 2001.
D. Emotional Dilema
Fleeing Ireland.
Safety of MF, the child left behind.
Priority of insulating his family from poverty.
Frustration at sons’ lack of interest in learning the scrap metal business.
Business is secretly “bought out” from his son by his partner and his son in 1957.
Fallout/Impact on MF’s grandsons, who had been to take over the business.
Impact on family after business is sold out from under their father, MF’s son, a president/figurehead who never really learned the workings of the business.
E. Major Twists
MF’s partner and his son are secretly plotting and take over the business.
F. Reversals
Same. MF’s partner and his son are secretly plotting and take over the business.
G. Character Betrayals
Same. MF’s partner and his son are secretly plotting and take over the business.
H. Big Surprises.
The essence of Michael Flynn intervenes at conclusion to save the author’s life.
2. Interest to a Producer
A. Great character roles for big-name actors.
B. Dramatic portrays of Irish Famine, early New York era of
immigrants, Tammany Hall, Great Depression, 50’s New York.C. Opportunities for great musical scores, ie The Godfather, Somewhere
in Time.
D. Universal story of father-son relationships or lack thereof.E. Beyond initial large crowd location scenes, there are many close-in
family scenes, ie kitchens, dining rooms, front stoops. -
(JENNA) What I learned most from this assignment is to think of my script in a whole new way (with my “business hat” on).
“10 Most Interesting Things” about my script STEALING BUDDHA’S DINNER:
<b style=”background-color: var(–bb-content-background-color); font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit; color: var(–bb-body-text-color);”>A. What is most unique about your villain and hero?
Both are “God-fearing”… they just believe in different gods.
They’re polar opposites living 10 feet apart.
They both need and hate each other.
B. Major hook of your opening scene?
Protagonist is caught casing villain’s picture-perfect bedroom.
C. Any turning points?
Estranged mother resurfaces in America.
Protagonist’s Asian role model/ally defects to the popular American girls.
Protagonist’s sister takes the blame for destroying villain’s bedroom.
D. Emotional dilemma?
Protagonist must choose between Asian vs. American identity.
E. Major twists?
Christian villain enlists heathen protagonist to help nail role in her church’s play.
Protagonist’s embarrassing Asian party becomes unlikely last-minute venue for the school dance.
F. Reversals?
Step-mom sets protagonist up for social suicide, then rescues her from it.
G. Character betrayals?
Loyal sister dumps protagonist for cool new step-sister.
Dad steals protagonist’s money to host a party that will regain his stature in the Asian community.
Step-sister’s boyfriend dumps her when she’s grounded from the school dance and won’t be able to put out.
H. Any big surprises?
The sister who yearns most for their estranged mother is the “reason” their mother got left behind in Vietnam.
Step-mom’s intentions to keep protagonist’s heritage alive are born from consequences of renouncing her own heritage.
The school dance is saved by Asian underdog/protagonist’s dad’s party (with her money that he stole).
Other things that could interest a producer?
STEALING BUDDHA’S DINNER is the next SIXTEEN CANDLES, but with Asian representation.
SIXTEEN CANDLES had a budget of $6.5 million and grossed $24 million.
Teen movies generate big audiences.
STEALING BUDDHA’S DINNER is based on a funny and harrowing Chicago Tribune “Best Book of the Year” true story, which I control the rights to.
It has great roles for bankable actors:
Bich: nerdy fish-out-of-water Asian protagonist
Jennifer: holier-than-thou drama queen/villain
Rosa: headstrong Hispanic step-mom and activist
Anh: protagonist’s loyal/protective older sister
Crissy: cool/street-smart step-sister
Mr. Nguyen: complex/charismatic father
-
Nick Walsh / 10 MOST INTERESTING THINGS
What I learnt: “… interesting things” are things discovered when asking the appropriate hidden questions, and, in doing so, can give more insight on how to present it and make the story even more interesting.
1. Go through your project and see which of these specific hooks you have:
- A. What is most unique about your villain and hero?
—Protag, Michael, pretending to be a priest is an atheist.
- B. Major hook of your opening scene?
—Pegasus leaps a 7-foot fence and escapes with Michael.
- C. Any turning points?
—The soldiers are shooting at him.
—Michael regretfully hears Kathleen’s confession and decides to go on the run again.
—The news of Rose’s murder at episode end causes him to stay and get revenge.
- D. Emotional dilemma?
—Michael releases his beloved Pegasus back into the wild to avoid being captured, too.
—Michael must make a fast decision: To get on his horse and ride away, chancing getting caught; or, staying to get revenge, chancing getting caught
- E. Major twists?
—Soldiers are stopped by the same wall that was intended to entrap Michael.
—Michael unwittingly hears Kathleen’s confession.
- F. Reversals?
—What appears as a soldier leading his comrades into battle turns out to be that soldier’s armed pursuers.
- G. Character betrayals?
—Just the opposite: Kathleen is coerced by the police to ID Michael, but doesn’t.
- H. Any big surprises?
—A surreal aspect of a horse calmly grazing with a saddle hanging loosely underbelly, in the middle of the road.
—A dead priest at edge of cliff.
—Michael smashes the dead priest’s face in with a rock.
2. Make a list of any other things in your script that could interest a producer.
—Michael cleverly removes Pegasus’ horseshoes in a bog.
—Michael takes over the dead priest’s identity.
—Rose pulling on the tail of a cow, a repossessor pulling by the rein at other end.
—Michael unwittingly hears Kathleen’s confession.
3. Select the 10 most interesting things.
—What appears as a soldier leading his comrades in a charge turns out to be that soldier’s armed pursuers.
—Pegasus incredulously leaps a 7-foot fence and escapes with Michael.
—An emotional departure as Michael releases his beloved Pegasus back into the wild to avoid being captured, too.
—A surreal aspect of a horse calmly grazing with a saddle hanging loosely underbelly, in the middle of the road.
—A dead priest at edge of cliff.
—Michael smashes the dead priest’s face in with a rock to erase his true identity.
—Michael, an atheist, takes over the dead priest’s identity.
—Rose pulling on the tail of a cow, a repossessor pulling by the rein at other end and a very drunk Michael intervening on his horse and getting clubbed senseless for the effort.
—Michael unwittingly hears Kathleen’s confession.
—Michael learns Rose has been murdered as he’s about to run away. He must make a fast decision: To get on his horse and ride away, chancing getting caught; or, staying to get revenge for Rose’s alleged murder, chancing getting caught.
-
Assignment #4 Aurora’s Ten Most Interesting Things
1. My projects has these specific hooks:
<ul type=”disc”>
- A. What is most unique
about your villain and hero?1.Theophilus Cato is a tough Roman soldier that loves the Jewish slaves he grew up with as they are like family,
2. Actually the slaves and master are closely related, Cato later discovers.
3. Cato prides himself on being loyal.
<ul type=”disc”>
- B. Major hook of your
opening scene?4. Cato parades the Carnyx, a very unique and creepy sounding captured barbarian battle trumpet (think the sounds made by the aliens in the most recent War of the Worlds) that very few people know about because only recently was one reconstructed and someone learned to play it.
<ul type=”disc”>
- C. Any turning points?
5. The violent attacks on Philip during his foot race.
6. the false accusations and surprising execution of Cato’s favorite Jewish soldier, by spectacularly tossing him down the Gemonian steps.
<ul type=”disc”>
- D. Emotional dilemma?
7. Does the loyalist Cato serve the anti-Semitic policies of a new Roman regime or protect his beloved family of unruly Jewish slaves?
<ul type=”disc”>
- E. Major twists?
8. Philip, one of Cato’s beloved slaves has joined the rebels,
9. implicated Cato in a murder and
10. the other slave is blackmailed into spying on her Master.
11. A trusted new friend is really working against Cato.
12. A young Jewish female refugee, who presents as passive and vulnerable, is really a trained fighter that is willing and able to defend the family from anti-Semitic attackers.
13. and uses the opportunity to kill a Jewish spy that is her captor.
<ul type=”disc”>
- F. Reversals?
- 14. Cato a popular war
hero that entertains the crowds by parading the Carnyx , faces a crowd
pleasing death as a rebel on the
Gemonian stairs. 15. The man who values loyal is not.- G. Character
betrayals?16. Cato’s mentor is plotting his downfall.
17. Sejanus, the Praetorian that the Emperor leaves in charge of Roman administration, plots to take over entirely.
18. Cato refuses to guard his beloved Emperor because the new assignment involves spying for Sejanus on the Emperor.
19. Cato, who loves and understands Jews, agrees to ferret out and kill a Jewish Insurrectionist.
20. Cato, whose god is Mercury, forced to but agrees to worship the war god Mars instead.
<ul type=”disc”>
- H. Or any big
surprises?21. Death of Cato’s best soldier, Azaraiah.
22.Anti-Semitic attack during the Seder
23.Hannah’s agreement to spy on her master Cato in order to protect her son.
24.Roman poet Virgil wrote a poem about a virgin born warrior king that brings down the Roman Empire.
II. 10 most interesting things.
1. Centurion Theophilus Cato parades the Carnyx, a very unique and creepy sounding captured barbarian battle trumpet (think the sounds made by the aliens in the most recent War of the Worlds) that very few people know about because only recently was one reconstructed and someone learned to play it.
2. Loyalist Cato’s dilemma- does he serve the anti-Semitic policies of a new Roman regime or protect his beloved family of unruly Jewish slaves?
3. The surprising execution of Cato’s favorite Jewish soldier, by spectacularly tossing him down the Gemonian steps.
4. The violent attacks on Cato’s slave Philip during his foot race.
5. Slave Philip is secretly collaborating with Jewish rebels.
6. An anti-Semitic attack on Cato and his household during a Seder at Cato’s villa.
7. A young Jewish female refugee, presenting as passive and vulnerable, is really a trained and vicious fighter able to defend Cato’s household from attackers and in the process also kill a man posing as her uncle, but who is in fact her captor.
8. Cato refuses to guard his beloved Emperor Tiberius because the new assignment involves spying for Sejanus on the Emperor
9.Roman poet Virgil wrote a poem about a virgin born warrior king, son of the sun-god that brings down the Roman Empire.
10. Cato, who loves and understands Jews, agrees to ferret out and kill a Jewish Insurrectionist.
III. I learned doing this assignment that I have a lot of points of interest and they should be sharpened up in the script, so I can speak of them with more clarity.
- A. What is most unique
-
RIchard Senne’s 10 Most Interesting Things
What I learned doing this assignment is…By distilling the story I am focusing on story points instead of details. I find that these points are hooks to tell the story in a better fashion.
1. Go through your project and see which of these specific hooks you have:
· A. What is most unique about your villain and hero?
Jessica puts herself in dangerous situations in a calculated way in order to save others.
Dr Ardashir is driven by betrayal to seek revenge
· B. Major hook of your opening scene?
Jessica attaches explosives to drones and kills her enemies
· C. Any turning points?
Jessica survives the lethal bio-weapon attack and gets discharged from the military.
Jessica meets up with Owen, her old collage boyfriend, who owns a drone company and gives her a job.
The military advisor, Dr Ardashir, is exposed as a psychopathic terrorist.
· D. Emotional dilemma?
Should Jessica refuse to take time off and rest or should she go to the mountains with her sisters to recover?
· E. Major twists?
it’s discovered that Jessica had her DNA altered in experiments as a child.
Dr Ardashir gets Dr Kamar to take Jessica to the mountains to rest. Dr Ardashir is planning to capture Jessica and use her blood to cure her son from the bio-weapon.
· F. Reversals?
Jessica doesn’t crash the drone after the harpooning, but she brings it back to crash and kill Dr Ardashir.
· G. Character betrayals?
Kamar betrays Jessica to save his family from death.
Ardashir betrays Kamar and kills him.
· H. Or any big surprises?
Jessica uses the harpoon mechanism to stop Ardashir’s drone attack on Washington DC.
2. Make a list of any other things in your script that could interest a producer.
Jessica is a special ops soldier. Her team is killed by a bio-weapon, leaving her the sole survivor.
She is discharged from the military, so Jessica must navigate through becoming a civilian.
Jessica takes medication that Kamar gave her to get her sick.
She goes to the mountains to rest and finds out Ardashir has a hidden base.
After being captured she frees herself and kills terrorists to get to Ardashir.
3. Organize both and select the 10 most interesting things. Post those to the forums.
Jessica attaches explosives to drones and kills her enemies.
Her team is killed by a bio-weapon, leaving her as the sole survivor.
Jessica survives the lethal bio-weapon attack and gets discharged from the military.
Jessica meets up with Owen, her old collage boyfriend, who owns a drone company and gives her a job.
The military advisor, Ardashir, is exposed as a psychopathic terrorist.
it’s discovered that Jessica had her DNA altered in experiments as a child.
Ardashir gets Kamar to take Jessica to the mountains to rest. Ardashir is planning to capture Jessica and use her blood to cure her son from the bio-weapon.
Kamar betrays Jessica to save his family from death.
Ardashir betrays Kamar and kills him.
Jessica uses the harpoon mechanism to stop Ardashir’s drone attack on Washington DC.
Jessica doesn’t crash the drone after the harpooning, but she brings it back to crash and kill Ardashir.
Log in to reply.