Lesson 4

[Tony Scott]

Tony J. Scott Basic Plotting

I learned that stories are not thought out in dreams and inspirations. Stories are created through order, formula and structure.

· HIGH CONCEPT: In a world where the Vatican is winning the war against the Vampires a young black woman, half human and half vampire, must fulfill prophesy by traveling back and forth through time to Savannah Ga, 1863 to kill her slave ancestor, break her family curse and lead the future peace agreement.

· MAIN CONFLICT: The Vampires are losing the war to The Vatican and though she’d rather die than become a full on vampire, Nadia must fulfill a prophecy, over throw her father to help lead the world into peace.

Old Ways: self hatred, out spoken, sickly, hates her heritage, disobedient, hates the world she lives in.

New Ways: Loves herself, proud, victorious leader, the one to lead the world to peace, proud of her heritage.

Core Traits: Intelligent, determined, compassionate, but impulsive and defiant.

4-Act Structure:

ACT 1:

Opening: It’s Nadia’s 21^st birthday party and transformation celebration (“Usiku wa Kinyonga).” She is to turn from half human and half vampire to full vampire. This transformation demands that she bite a human and drink human blood.

However after a memory is triggered about how human captives are treated, and what happened to her mother, she refuses to go through with the transformation. She doesn’t want to become a vampire. She secretly plans to commit suicide.

Inciting Incident: Nadia is deceived by her conniving father and discovers a way to end the curse for her. She is caught by her uncle trying to permanently end the life of her vampire grandfather who is currently lying in a sleep state in the family mausoleum until a time pre-determined.

Turning Point: Nadia finally remembers what happened to her mother and it’s not the lie her father told her years ago.

2. starting with your 4-Act Structure, add the following components into your story to create the first draft of your Beat Sheet.

Genre: Syfy Drama Horror

Act 1: Nadia wants her father to end the war with the Vatican.

Inciting Incident: The TV broadcast states that the vampires are winning the war but Nadia, looking out the window, and everyone else can see the war waging closer to the Vampire city limits daily.

Nadia PJ: Nadia voices her opposition about the war and that her father should sign the peace agreement before they are all wiped out. Not that she cares but she is thinking about her uncle.

Lucius AJ: Reminds her of the tv broadcaster’s report.

Nadia PJ: mentions how every vampire killed makes the humans stronger in battle.

Vincent TC: Agrees.

Lucius AJ: Assures them his scientists all agree they are just rumors.

Nadia PJ: reminds Lucius that he keeps the scientists locked away in a dungeon lab.

Deeper Layer: Lucius knows they are losing the war but doesn’t care.

Deeper Layer: Nadia, for reasons unknown to her, hates being half vampire and wants to live her life as a human.

Nadia PJ: Mentions how things would be different if her mother were still here.

Reveal: Lucius gives us a glimpse of Nadia’s mother’s last day with them, running for her life and being carried off in a Black Suv.

Lucius AJ: Lies about Nadia’s mother abandoning them and lashes out angrily about how Nadia fiddles with her red bracelet when she is stressed.

Deeper Layer: Lucius feels guilt when Nadia plays with her red bracelet. Her Mom had one just like it.

Lucius AJ: Agrees to talk more about Nadia’s peace concerns after the celebration is over.

LATER:

Nadia PJ: Nadia has a traumatic memory triggered during her Usiku wa Kinyonga.” party.

Inciting Incident: Human bodies are brought into the banquet hall by the serving staff and hung 2-3 bodies on display at each dining table. They are served as human blood fountains to the vampires.

Deeper Layer: This is how Nadia remembers seeing her human mother the last time she saw her and before her memory was suppressed.

Inciting Incident: Nadia refuses to continue with the ritual of her full vampire assimilation.

Nadia PJ: Nadia confronts her father, embarrasses him at her coming out celebration. She storms off.

Vincent TC: shows up to Nadia’s room and places her under guard.

Lucius AJ: Takes up the offering for the war effort from the town’s vampire citizens.

They argue:

Lucius AJ: In anger, has an attendee thrown in prison and sentenced to death during the party.

Deeper Layer: Lucius is caught in a lie but won’t admit he’s wrong about the war effort.

Lucius AJ: After the party, He scolds Nadia for embarrassing him in front of the villagers and the higher ups attending the party.

Nadia PJ: brings up her mother again. (Psychiatrist).

Deeper Layer: She figures out it’s why she hates vampires.

Lucius AJ: Jokes with Nadia about killing her grandfather while he sleeps.

Cat in the window: Dancing after the dinner ends, ongoing entertainment.

Vincent TC: Uncle tries to comfort Nadia. He explains what Lucius meant about the rumor of breaking the curse.

Lucius AJ: gives Vincent a threatening look.

Deeper Layer: Lucius is not really joking.

Nadia PJ: meets with the mansion scientists who agree because they think Nadia will use it on her father who they hate.

Nadia PJ: Takes an IV bag of dead man’s blood to her grandfather’s crypt to kill him. The crypt is guarded 24/7.

Inciting incident: attempts suicide.

Vincent TC: Saves Nadia from burning alive. He explains why it wouldn’t work.

Vincent TC: Nadia would have to go back in time to do it if it were possible.

Turning Point: Vincent gives Nadia a family heirloom. It glows but only she can see it.

Deeper layer: In reality Nadia really just wished that her father wasn’t in charge. Now she truly hates him. She really wants peace with the humans.

· Act 2 Nadia begins to time travel so she can kill her grandfather.

New Plan: Nadia discovers the location of her vampire patriarchal ancestor in the year 1863 and plans to time travel to kill him on the plantation where he is a slave. Her ancestor has to die by her hands, a blood relative, to break the curse.

Plan in Action: To find out who her ancestor is and kill him. Nadia thinks she has to fit in with the slaves on the plantation deceiving the slaves and the slave masters.

Midpoint Turning point: Nadia discovers that the kindest person on the plantation, the one elder she is most fond of is her ancestor that she has to kill.

Nadia PJ: Nadia is being held prisoner in her guarded room.

Inciting incident: Nadia time travels for the first time.

1. Travel to past

Vincent TC: Is in the room when it happens.

Nadia PJ: Is met in the bushes by the side of the road by a black man on a horse. She is expected.

Deeper Layer: Nadia doesn’t know where she is or how she got there or if she is dreaming or that the stranger on the horse is her grandfather.

Nadia PJ: questions the stranger and gets some answers.

Deeper Layer: The stranger answers as if he was expecting the questions.

Nadia PJ: remembers some of her vampire history and asks about Josiah. Gets no answer. Not polite to ask.

Nadia PJ: Riding on the horse, she gets a tour and watches as the slaves work the tobacco fields on a cloudy day.

Deeper Layer: Josiah doesn’t want Nadia to know who he really is yet.

Inciting Incident: A neighboring plantation owner confronts Josiah and demands the return of a runaway. He Threatens him with a whip. He’s surrounded and killed by slave vampires.

1. Return to present

Nadia PJ: Returns to the present.

Deeper layer: She notices that the stranger is wearing the same family heirloom.

Vincent TC: Is hysterical about how she moved from one place to another without being able to see her and her being half human.

Deeper Layer: Whenever Nadia returns to the present she is always laying down asleep and has to wake up.

Nadia PJ: Explains what happened.

Deeper Layer: She thinks it was all a dream.

Nadia PJ: and Vincent go to visit grandfather’s crypt.

Vincent TC: tells her the truth about how her father was captured by the slavers and taken to the colonies.

Deeper Layer: it’s a secret he’s kept from Lucius.

Nadia PJ: doubles down. Her grandfather has to die.

Vincent TC: realizes he’s now talking to himself.

Nadia PJ: hears Vincent mention something about a journal.

2. Travel to past

Nadia PJ: In the bushes by the road. She hears slave catchers on horseback.

Inciting Incident: Nadia watches as the kind stranger/Josiah deals with the slave catchers and their horses and three runaways.

Deeper Layer: she still hasn’t found out Josiah yet.

Inciting Incident: William Sanders plantation is surrounded by hooded night riders with torches. Josiah leads the other vampires to battle.

Turning Point: Nadia is convinced that the kind stranger from the road is actually Josiah, her grandfather.

Nadia PJ: hides out and hopes she doesn’t leave until she can kill Josiah.

Nadia PJ: Nadia stands over her sleeping grandfather holding a machete and has a chance to kill him but she notices her name written in his journal next to a prophecy.

Deeper Layer: Nadia doesn’t know that her grandfather is causing her to time travel.

Nadia PJ: her and Josiah have the talk.

Nadia PJ: Notices the entry in the original journal, Vincent is the true heir.

2. Travel to present

Lucius AJ: He has a secret meeting with a Vatican member about the processing plant and the war. Nadia over hears the conversation. Nadia overhears the zoom meet

Nadia PJ: hears that Vincent knows everything about everything and is very upset.

Vincent TC: He won’t tell her why he went along with Lucius’ plans.

Turning Point: Nadia feels she can no longer trust Uncle Vincent.

Deeper Layer: Vincent is not Nadia’s uncle but is her father but can’t tell her in order to save her life.

Nadia PJ: confronts Vincent again and tells him about the journal entry. She figures out that Vincent already knows.

Nadia PJ: Waits for a response, has to figure it out herself. It all makes sense now.

Deeper layer: Nadia always wondered why she seemed so much closer to her uncle than her own father.

Nadia PJ: Nadia needs the journal with the fake entry to make a plan.

Nadia PJ: She convinces Vincent to gather what allies he can before Lucius goes further with his plans.

Lucius AJ: He’s confused when he finds out that Nadia is not in her room where she should be or anywhere in the mansion.

Inciting Incident: Lucius reads a note about a fake entry in his father’s historic recorded journal and the word prophecy.

Character Connection: Staring at a photo, he has a triggered flashback about the affair between Nadia’s mother and his brother Vincent.

Journal/Thumb drive

Nadia PJ: steals the fake journal and a thumb drive from Lucius’ safe.

Nadia PJ: her and Vincent read the original journal.

Nadia PJ: watches the video of her mother’s death with Vincent in his office.

Vincent TC: knows what’s on the video.

· Act 3 Nadia falls for the soldier

Rethink Everything: Nadia is back to the present and researches the vampire archives. She wonders why her father is in the leader of the Vampire covens and not her uncle who is older.

New Plan: Nadia realizes that it is her great elder, Josiah Freeman, who is calling her back to the past for a reason, to fulfill a prophecy in the future. “From future’s past will peace come.”

Turning Point: Vampire Hunters arrive at the plantation operating as Emancipation Proclamators who go from one plantation to another spreading the news of freedom but also killing vampires along the way.

Lucius AJ: Has a prisoner attempt to kill his father but catches him in the act. Betrayal.

Deeper layer: Lucius stages the murder attempt to show he is a hero and worthy leader.

Character Connection: Standing over his father’s crypt he has a flashback to when his father was abducted by slave hunters.

Lucius AJ: kills the villager in the sun room and makes a big show of it.

3. Travel to past.

Nadia PJ: She returns to the plantation to find Northern Soldiers there to announce the emancipation proclamation to the slaves.

Nadia PJ: She has romantic feelings for Cpt. Sherman.

Nadia PJ: She and Josiah talk more. Prophecy, The Caves, The curse.

Nadia PJ: meets William Sanders and his very large wealthy family.

3. Travel to present

Nadia PJ: She and Vincent research the vampire archives and finds out all slaves were free in 1863 and that there were vampire hunters during the civil war doubling as soldiers.

Cpt. Sherman: Tortures one of the slaves. Why won’t the slaves leave the plantation since they are free?

Vincent TC: finally explains that he has betrayed his brother twice and deserves a chance.

4 Travel to past.

Nadia PJ: Nadia finds out that slaves of the plantation are missing and presumed dead.

Nadia PJ: Spend intimate time together.

Inciting Incident: Cpt. Sherman reveals to Nadia his secret.

Turning Point: Cpt. Sherman has to detain Nadia when it’s feared that she will warn the vampires.

4 Travel to present.

Nadia PJ: Escapes captivity by returning to the present.

Deeper Layer: Nadia was hoping that Cpt. Sherman wasn’t a vampire hunter.

Lucius AJ: Calls a hurried meeting for a vote to take over the family officially. He assures them he will call for peace when he is made permanent head ruler.

Inciting Incident: Vincent, in confidence, demands that Nadia be present for the vote.

Lucius AJ: sends Vincent off to locate Nadia.

Lucius AJ: During the meeting a war general reports the war on the front lines and the outcome to Lucius and others.

Lucius AJ: has the general and others at the meeting secretly killed in his side office.

Lucius AJ: bites the general, gets a firsthand look at the war from his pov and then throws him in the office sun room.

Lucius AJ: Discusses what needs to happen when Nadia disappears in front of Lucius.

5 Travel to past.

Turning Point: Lucius interrogates Vincent.

Lucius AJ: throws Vincent in the secret side sun office. He thinks Vincent and Nadia are up to something.

Deeper Layer: Lucius can’t bring himself to kill his brother but leaves him there.

Turning Point: Lucius can’t find his father’s original journal with the fake entry.

Lucius AJ: He has the guards search the whole mansion for Nadia but she can’t be found.

Deeper Layer: Lucius is afraid that Vincent is going to tell everyone the truth.

· ACT 4 Dilemma, Nadia becomes a fully fledged vampire.

Climax: Nadia has to kill her ancestor before Cpt. Stanley can or she will live her life as a vampire in the present. She has to save her ancestor’s life by killing the soldiers.

Resolution: After the soldiers are all dead, Nadia can’t bring herself to kill her ancestor. She embraces who she is and falls in love with her history and family heritage. She discovers her grandfather’s true journal that records that Vincent should be the head of the Vampire Covens in her grandfather’s absence. She returns to the present and leads the Vatican/Vampire peace accord.

She searches the history books to now discover that the freedom news never reached the slaves in Texas for another two years because she killed the emancipation proclamators before they could reach Texas delaying freedom for over 250000 slaves.

THE PLANTATION IS UNDER ATTACK

Turning Point: Nadia realizes she has full vampire benefits when in the past.

Inciting Incident: Nadia feels she has to save her grandfather when she discovers most of the clan is dead. He’s cornered and injured.

Nadia PJ: shows up in time to save her grandfather from the fate of the vampire hunters.

Nadia PJ: She has to bite Cpt. Sherman, killing him and the other soldiers.

Nadia PJ: she can see his whole history of killing vampires while she drinks his blood.

Nadia PJ: Nadia because she has finally killed a human becomes a full time vampire.

Nadia PJ: Nadia returns to her time and brings her grandfather’s original journal.

5 Travel to present

Inciting incident: She proves to the Vampire Council that Lucius has deceived them all and that Vincent should be the interim head of the Vampires.

Deeper Layer: There can now be peace, the war will end.

Lucius AJ: Has been secretly putting dissenters in the dungeon jail and sentenced to death.

Lucius AJ: He escapes from jail and walks into the sunroom. Suicide.

Inciting Incident: Vincent is voted in as head.

Inciting Incident: The Vatican/Vampire peace Council is formed.

Vincent TC: The Vatican/Vampire Peace accord is broadcast on every Media Channel. Vampires and Humans formation up and march away. Surviving humans are released from the food processing plants.

Nadia PJ: finds out that she has altered history and that over 250K slaves in Texas were never freed because she killed the soldiers.

Vincent doesn’t know that she is referring to Juneteenth.

[Claudia OBrien]

Subject Line: Claudia’s New Outline Beats.

My vision: To become the best screenwriter I can be, and to find success in the industry.

What I learned from this assignment is that this exercise is hard, but important, so that the structure of the screenplay makes sense and includes all necessary elements. Otherwise, a first draft of the screenplay will have logic gaps and holes that need to be addressed later.

***

Act 1: Grace goes to war, the weight of her family’s expectations on her shoulders. [NB: Throughout Act 1, Grace is extremely worried about appearances and highly deferential to those with higher ranks.]

Grace PJ 1: Grace receives the blessing of her newly-ordained
brother and her father as she reports for duty as an Army nurse – along
with an admonition not to “disappoint them.” <div>

Deeper Layer: Grace’s older brother went AWOL after D-Day. The
family has disowned him but Grace hopes to find him.

Ann AJ 1: Grace meets Ann.
[Ann wears a necklace chain with a locket and a key on it. Grace says she
is the oldest of six children. Ann says she has only a kid sister,
Margie.] [Grace walks in as Ann reviews a
patient chart. Ann is talking angrily to herself about all the errors the
doctor [Dr. Grey] made and what really needs to be done – while quoting
Dickens and referring to the doctor by a disparaging Dickens-based
nickname. Ann then edits the chart so that, in her view it is correct. She
pushes back the curtain and her angry mood is immediately gone, replaced
by compassion and competence as she treats the injured serviceman – while
Grace watches in amazement.]

Deeper Layer: Ann is a closet lesbian who was disowned for her
sexual orientation.

Grace PJ 1A: Grace meets Dr. Samuel Grey, her commanding
officer, and fellow nurse Rachel Schneider. Ann questions him about the
Officer’s Club issue. (Women officers pay dues but aren’t allowed in the
Club without a male escort.) His response shows him to be both racist and
sexist – but Grace is very deferential.

Inciting Incident: Grace meets Booker, a Tuskegee airman. She
is immediately drawn to him – and also notices how others treat him.

Ann AJ 2: Ann notices the attraction and is jealous.

Booker PJ 1: Booker is attracted to
Grace but rejects any idea of a relationship. [Talking with a fellow
Tuskegee airman, Keith Washington, as they are getting their aircraft
ready to fly a mission.]

Grace PJ 1B: Grace and Booker continue to run into each other.
She can’t help flirting; he tries hard to stay aloof.

Ann AJ 3: Ann and Booker interaction – at loggerheads.
Grace PJ 2: Grace thinks a Dr. Grey’s diagnosis is wrong – and
Ann agrees with her.

Turning Point 1: Grace follows Dr. Grey’s directions and her
patient dies because of the incorrect treatment.

Act 2: Grace’s interests diverge from her family’s but she tries to remain obedient. [NB: Grace is somewhat less concerned about appearances in the beginning of Act 2 – but reverts back to being highly deferential after receiving her parents’ letter. In the first part of Act 2, she seeks out Booker. But in the second half, she avoids him.]

Grace PJ 2A: A scene after the patient dies. Ann tries to comfort
Grace even though she thinks Grace shouldn’t have followed Dr. Grey’s
directions. A distraction: asks why her brother isn’t in the war. He’s a
newly ordained priest. Ann asks, isn’t it usually the second son who
becomes a priest? Yes, usually. </div>

Grace PJ 2B: Grace and Booker scene. She is engaged and
excited. He is polite and aloof.

<div>

Grace PJ 3: Grace writes to her parents about her feelings for Booker.

Grace PJ 4: Grace starts listening more to Ann and questioning
those in authority. Grace, Ann and Rachel go together to the Officer’s
Club – without a male escort. They are removed.
Grace PJ 4A: Dr. Grey sends Grace, Ann and Rachel to an Army
psychiatrist for their attempt to enter the Officer’s Club. Grace is
ashamed. Rachel is stoic. Ann is angry.

Booker PJ 2: Booker performs
heroically and saves the life of another pilot in a dogfight – but when
they get back to base, that pilot has claimed the credit.

Ann AJ 4: Ann tries to undermine
Booker in Grace’s eyes. [Maybe claims he wrongly tried to take credit for winning
the dogfight?]

Grace PJ 5: Her parents respond forbidding her from any kind of
relationship with “a man like that.” In an effort to forget Booker, Grace
starts dating a White soldier, Liam Connelly. [They go to the Officer’s
Club.]

Grace PJ 5A: Grace, Ann and Rachel meet a new
nurse, Susan. Grace slips and says she has six siblings.
Grace PJ 5B: Grace, [Ann] and Rachel run into
Booker [and a friend of his?]. Grace tries to be standoffish and aloof;
Rachel hits it off with him immediately.

Booker PJ 3: Rachel befriends
Booker, talks about the plight of the Jews under the Nazis – and he opens
up about being Black under Jim Crow.

Grace PJ 6: Grace wanders around the new town,
discreetly trying to find someone.

Grace PJ 6A: Ann calls Grace out on her six siblings – and
Grace says her older brother Patrick was killed at D-Day.

Turning Point 2: Grace gets pregnant – and discovers Liam with Susan.
Grace tries to commit suicide.

Booker PJ 4: Booker finds Grace before she can kill herself and
stops her. Brings her to Ann.

Act 3: Grace starts to rebel. [NB: In Act 3, then even more in Act 4, Grace cares less and less what others think of her.]

Grace PJ 7: Grace chooses the least bad among the alternatives
– and asks Ann to give her an abortion. </div><div>

Grace PJ 7A: Ann, Rachel and Booker try to help Grace recover
from her feelings of despair.

Grace PJ 7B: Grace approaches Booker to thank him for saving
her. And to apologize for being aloof and rude. He can’t help but warm
towards her.

Ann AJ 5: Ann convinces Grace to get subversive.
They pilfer medical supplies so that the wounded Black soldiers can be
treated medically as well as the White soldiers.

Booker PJ 5: Booker sees what Grace is doing –
with Ann’s leadership and develops a grudging respect for her. [Ann and Booker scene.]

Grace PJ 7B: Grace convinces Ann and Rachel to go
to the Officer’s Club again. They are ejected again. [Sent to a
psychiatrist again?]

Grace PJ 8: Grace gets bolder about going around
each new town, looking for someone.

Grace PJ 8A: She gets back to base just before
curfew – runs into Booker, who wonders why she is out so late and where
she has been.

Grace PJ 9: As
recovery rates in their ward soar, Dr. Grey tries to undermine them – and
Grace is furious. [This seems a little awkward and like it needs more.]

Booker PJ 5A: Booker realizes he is in love with Grace.
But refuses to do anything about it. [Booker and Keith scene.]

Ann AJ 6: Ann tells Grace
that nobody has the right to dictate who you love
– but Grace thinks she’s talking about Grace’s love for Booker, not Ann’s
love for her. [Ann’s monologue.]

Turning Point 3: Grace confesses her love to Booker, but he
rejects her. [She is shocked; she thought the feelings were mutual.] Ann,
comforting Grace, finally confesses her love – and Grace rejects her,
appalled.

Act 4: Climax and Resolution

· Booker PJ 6: Booker is devastated at rejecting Grace but believes he has done the right thing. Rachel convinces Booker not to give up on his life – and to try to win back Grace.

· Ann AJ 6A: Ann is devastated by Grace’s rejection. What does she do? Avoid Grace?

· Grace PJ 10: Grace finds her older brother. He suffered from PTSD and a TBI at the D-Day invasion and deserted. He was nursed back to health by an Algerian woman in the French Resistance, whom he loves. He begs her not to tell their parents he is alive. She realizes no one controls who they love – and understands that Ann is in the same position as she is.

· Ann AJ 7: Grace finds Ann and apologies. Tells her about her disowned brother. She confesses that she was disowned by her family – everyone except her kid sister Margie – when they discovered she was a lesbian.

· Ann AJ 7A and Grace PJ 10A: Officer’s Club resolution. Over Capt. Grey’s objections, women officers no longer have to pay Officer’s Club dues – although they still can’t go in without an escort.

· Booker PJ 7: Booker gets in dogfight protecting a bomber – and is left behind by those pilots. He crashes – and everything goes black.

· Grace PJ 10A: Booker is missing. She is frantic. She goes to her brother, asks him to find Booker.

· Booker PJ 7A: Patrick uses his connections with the French Resistance to locate Booker. Patrick realizes that Booker will not survive unless he gets him to a hospital. So Patrick brings Booker to Grace at the Army forward hospital.

· Booker PJ 8: Booker wakes in the forward hospital, where he is being treated by Grace.

Grace PJ 11: Grace will try to save Booker, no matter what,
even if they can never be together.
Climax: the Germans mount a counterattack and the forward
hospital is under siege. Everyone is ordered to leave, with as many
patients as they can take. Grace refuses to leave Booker, who is too
injured to move. Patrick shows up to help. </div>

Ann AJ 8: Ann realizes she loves
Grace enough to want her to be happy. Ann and Patrick sacrifice themselves
to give Grace and Booker a chance at life and love. Ann gives Grace the chain
around her neck – with the locket and the key – and whispers a final
request.

Resolution: Patrick’s and Ann’s heroism saves Grace and Booker.
Booker admits his love for Grace and agrees that they should try to find a
place where they can be together.

Grace PJ 12; Booker PJ 6: Grace and Booker use the key to remove
papers from a safe deposit box. At a rundown tenement in Philadelphia,
they meet Ann’s sister Margie – and give her a letter, the deed to Ann’s
home and enough money to raise her kids, from the safe deposit box.

[Will Jennings]

Subject line: Will Jennings’ New Outline Beats!

My Vision: I will write movies that are extremely funny and entertaining and bring a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment to a world starving for true enjoyment.

What I learned from doing this assignment is how to connect cause and effect throughout the entire script.

Act 1: The girls are informed by their mother the Queen it is time to travel to Earth and begin the mission.

Abigail PJ 1: Abigail is petrified of going to a place filled with lunatics. Gwendolyn: Camp! Are you crazy?

PJ 2: The girls are sucked into a wormhole and whisked into space passing by stars and constellations.

Brandi AJ 1: Brandi is picked up by her mother in a Dodge Charger from a government building.

Deeper Layer: She just was released from juvenile hall for committing a series of misdemeanors.

Inciting Incident: The girls are introduced in school and a rude girl embarrasses them in front of the entire class.

Brandi AJ 2: Brandi is threatened with losing her status and just destroys and humiliates the twins to no end as the class is roaring.

PJ 3: The girls realize this is not going to be a love feast and they will need to toughen up to be taken seriously.

Turning Point 1: The girls decide to throw a party for all the uncool kids and the bad girl shows up with her mother’s motorcycle gang.

Brandi AJ 3: Riding on the back of a motorcycle, Brandi is hurling insults at anyone she recognizes.

PJ 4: This is the final insult, and they respond by scaring off the motorcycle gang with flying drones. One has a trooper siren, another flashing cop lights, and yet another pretends to be a police helicopter.

Deeper Layer: The motorcycle gang thinks the swat team is headed their way and they thunder off to the complete delight of the uncool kids as they see that the girls controlling the drones.

Act 2: The girls try contacting the authorities to assist.

Deeper Layer: The harder they try; it becomes obvious that the police and city hall are not interested in giving any protection from the gang.

Brandi and her mom: AJ 4: They begin to get reports that the twins are trying to turn up the heat and are amused at the newcomers.

Turning Point 2 / Midpoint: The girls find out that Brandi’s mom is the leader of a crime family and they have put a lot of people in danger.

PJ 5: Sir Daniel assures them he will protect all the kids from any type of threat.

Deeper Layer: The girls find great comfort in knowing how skilled Sir Daniel is at reconnaissance and defense.

Act 3: They decide to take a trip back to Fairyland and figure out how to deal with this level of corruption.

PJ 6: As the girls are entertaining two school friends at their house, a pillow fight breaks out and the four of them cartwheel into the transporter room and are sucked into the one-way wormhole and blasted back to Fairytale Land.

Deeper Layer: The girls are frightened of what their mother the Queen will say when they arrive with two humans.

PJ 7: As they arrive in Fairytale Land, the Queen is waiting and sprinkles some fairy dust on the two guests so they will not remember anything of their adventure.

Turning Point 3: Their new plan is to bring muses and fairies back to Earth to gather hard evidence against the bad guys and to end their reign of terror.

AJ 5: The gang calls a meeting to decide how to get rid of the medaling interlopers.

The gang summons all their mobsters to the twins’ house to show them who is boss once and for all.

AJ 6: They decide to smash up the place.

Deeper Layer: Unknowingly, the thugs have destroyed their otherworldly toys and have left the twins defenseless.

PJ 8: With the help of Sir Daniel, a plan is formulated to attack the gang and defend their turf. A communication network is installed to direct all activities. New special otherworldly toys are ordered to be delivered from the other side.

PJ 9: Invisible recognizance is carried out by the muses and fairies in city hall, the police station, lawyers’ offices, and the gang’s home.

Deeper Layer: The muses and fairies have collected a mountain of criminal evidence against the bad guys and delivered it to the state attorney’s office. They also hired powerful lawyers to schmooze the press.

Act 4 Climax: Everyone arrives at the motorcycle picnic at the same time. While in invisible mode, the muses jump on some of the bikes and ride off while everyone thinks the motorcycles are running with no riders. Immediately, the fairies and muses appear and disappear while punching out the bad guys until they freak out. The fairies light off so many fireworks that the entire police force show up and arrest the gang.

Resolution: The gang is packed into a jail cell, strumming tin cups against the bars while singing blues tunes. As the gang members are pushed into the courtroom the following day, the mountain of evidence is presented, and they are charged with a ton of crimes. Brandi ends up back in reform school and gets beat up by anyone she sasses. The gang goes to prison and the girls are now the undisputed leaders of the new cool kids.

[Mahee Sanapareddy]

Mahee’s New Outline Beats

My Vision – I want to be a great writer who is well-respected and recognized in the industry, with successful books published and blockbuster movies produced. I want to create a successful movie franchise that audiences all over the world will love, rave about, look forward to, and continue to enjoy many years from now.

What I learned from doing this assignment is being able to effectively plot my story.

Genre: Science Fiction Thriller

Title: Realm: Gates of Wrath

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ACT 1: In a wide-open field, a large, shiny, and spectacular extraterrestrial spaceship descends slowly and lands on the turf.

DuVernay AJ 1: Reverend DuVernay eagerly awaits along with several politicians and world leaders as 1ONTAE, an alien warlord, an extraterrestrial pharaoh, and an absolute giant of a human being, emerges out of the spaceship. Wearing a body armor made out of an other-worldly alloy and a large bird-of-prey helmet with thick hanging chains, he is here to spread chaos, corruption, hatred, and violence. As he stands with authority, everyone kneels, rises, and kisses his hand. DuVernay does his part as well. But his followers and supporters are oblivious to this periodic ritual.

DuVernay AJ 2: As he gets back into his car, one of his men mentions about a police brutality case. He breaks into a sinister smile.

Deeper Layer: It’s a perfect opportunity for him to feed off of the emotions of people while gaining popularity and support.

DuVernay AJ 3: Outside a building in Manhattan, DuVernay gives a stirring public speech. He riles up the audience, instigating the youngsters to do whatever it takes to fight for justice.

Trevon PJ 1: Trevon looks up to Reverend DuVernay in awe, inspired by his philosophies, his command, and his magnetic personality.

DuVernay AJ 4: Inside his home, DuVernay watches with a gleam in his eyes as a man is tortured. When a young woman approaches him for help to save her arrested brother, he makes an indecent proposal to her and forces her to consent.

Deeper Layer: DuVernay puts his flamboyant personality on display in public and his true disturbed personality in private.

DuVernay AJ 5: DuVernay learns of the meteoric rise of his archrival, Professor Cedric Campbell, and his peaceful philosophies and decides to do something about it. Professor Campbell, a prominent black historian, proposes from his extensive research that the black race had extraterrestrial origins and have been suppressed for thousands of years from achieving their full potential.

Deeper Layer: DuVernay considers Professor Campbell as a political threat who could influence his supporters and followers and end up undermining his power and position.

Trevon PJ 2: Trevon and a gang of violent mobsters barge into a conference hall of historians and go on a destroying spree. In that process he and his father, Professor Campbell, lock eyes with each other, surprised to find themselves on opposite sides of the melee.

Trevon PJ 3: Reverend DuVernay, sitting in the audience, lets out a sinister smile and applauds the mobsters. Trevon looks deadpan as his father and DuVernay go at each other.

INCITING INCIDENT: Professor Campbell threatens to expose DuVernay’s corrupt practices and evil agenda and thwart his chances in the upcoming elections.

Trevon PJ 4: Trevon drives his father home. Gets an earful from him but disagrees with his ideas and stubbornly refuses to listen to him.

Deeper Layer: Trevon senses that his father put his life in peril by going after a high-profile politician like Reverend DuVernay.

Trevon PJ 5 / DuVernay AJ 6: Trevon has fallen out of DuVernay’s favor.

Deeper Layer: DuVernay comes to know that Trevon is the son of his archrival and excludes him from all his gatherings because he can’t be trusted.

Sean PJ 1: Sean wakes up from a nightmare, sweating profusely, his eyes filled with terror. He had just gone through an interdimensional information download and this time it’s about him and Trevon – on an extraterrestrial mission in an alien world. His mind had also seen a cryptic message and he struggles to make sense of it. He desperately tries to reach out to Trevon.

Trevon PJ 6: Professor Campbell discredits DuVernay in the eyes of the public. Trevon tries to distance himself from his father to earn back DuVernay’s favor.

DuVernay AJ 7: DuVernay gathers his men and plans a secret attack on Professor Campbell without Trevon’s knowledge.

TURNING POINT 1: Professor Campbell is brutally murdered in his own home.

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ACT 2: Trevon’s worst fears have come true. His mind and heart are now in a conflict.

Trevon PJ 7: Trevon suspects DuVernay’s hand in his father’s murder. But he must somehow find out.

DuVernay AJ 8: DuVernay extols Professor Campbell in public, but berates him in private.

Trevon PJ 8: Trevon notices the two-faced personality of DuVernay. He now makes up his mind to take up his father’s failed ambition.

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Trevon goes with his intuition as he comes to a realization. DuVernay turned out to be the crooked two-faced politician exactly like his father had stated all along.

DuVernay AJ 9: DuVernay slams Trevon’s actions in the public media labeling them as the product of a deranged mind.

Trevon PJ 9: Trevon reaches out to his mob friends for information on DuVernay. They agree to help him.

Deeper Layer: Trevon doesn’t realize that they all have been compromised and are actually working for DuVernay.

DuVernay AJ 10: DuVernay organizes his mob of supporters and plans to kill Trevon as he has become a thorn in his flesh.

TURNING POINT 2: Sean comes to Trevon’s rescue and helps him escape the attempt on his life. Trevon and Sean go into hiding.

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ACT 3: Trevon is a wounded lion.

Trevon PJ 10: Determined to find answers, Trevon and Sean sneak into Professor Campbell’s house in the darkness of the night, wading through the endless yellow tape.

Sean PJ 2: Their focus falls on a cryptic message scribbled on the bedroom wall. Sean’s face drains of color as it’s the same message he saw in his nightmare.

Trevon PJ 11: Trevon opens the drawers and closets, pores over his father’s copious notes, research papers, and studies. Comes to know it wasn’t DuVernay’s men that killed his father. It was a homeless man present in the house on the night of the murder.

Deeper Layer: This is another twist. His father somehow foresaw his death and has left him a clue flooding his mind with more questions.

Sean PJ 3: Sean mentions the weird nightmare to Trevon saying he saw the cryptic message in his nightmare. He suggests a possible link between the assassin’s origin and the alien world.

Trevon PJ 12: Trevon doesn’t believe him at first. But when he finds the missing piece of the puzzle in his father’s research work – a reference to a certain Planet X in the Sirius star system, his mind gets thinking again.

Sean PJ 4: Sean suggests that the assassin possibly came all the way from the alien world with a single purpose – kill Professor Campbell.

Trevon PJ 13: Trevon realizes he must find the assassin’s purpose. To do that he needs to find a way to inter-dimensionally travel to Planet X searching for the assassin. Asks Sean for help.

Sean PJ 5: Sean is the only one who has the expertise of inter-dimensional travel. But he refuses to cooperate citing the dangers, complications, and time constraints involved.

Deeper Layer: Sean remembers a prophecy that is destined to doom him and fears the mission will make the prophecy come true.

Trevon PJ 14: Trevon reminds Sean he had helped him in the past and saved his life. Sean rethinks his decision and reluctantly agrees.

Trevon PJ 15 / Sean PJ 6: Trevon and Sean saddle up in the machine designed and developed by Dr. Sklar, an ex-military doctor and a practicing hypnotherapist. With the help of an AI constructed program, Trevon and Sean embark on an inter-dimensional voyage to an alien world on Planet X. They only have forty-eight Earth hours to complete the voyage and return.

TURNING POINT 3: The alien world is being run by the crooked regime of the evil warlord 1ONTAE who has been sending his trusted assassins all over the universe to unleash chaos, corruption, violence, and hatred.

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ACT 4: Trevon is shocked to encounter TALIYA and FALLAG, the extraterrestrial super-human alter-egos of himself and his father Cedric, in the alien world. They have been on the opposite sides of an age-old war. FALLAG and his rebellion have been imprisoned in underground caverns on the dark side of the planet and FALLAG’s son TALIYA has been fighting for the evil warlord 1ONTAE on the bright side.

Trevon PJ 16: Trevon comes to a realization this is a parallel world and his entire life is being mirrored here.

Deeper Layer: He has to be cautious as the decisions he takes here will have a direct impact on him in his own world.

Trevon PJ 17: Trevon comes to know that his inter-dimensional voyage has been actually pre-planned and he was intentionally brought here on a mission. He must pass through the gates of wrath – smoldering asteroids circling Planet X, enter the bright side of the planet, lure the evil genius TALIYA away from 1ONTAE’s forces, and help the rebellion win the war. And he’s on a race against time.

Sean PJ 7: Sean begins to get worried. The sight of the alien landscape has triggered memories of his nightmare and has confirmed that the prophecy of doom will certainly become a reality.

Trevon PJ 18: Trevon successfully entices TALIYA to join the rebellion. There’s hope for the rebellion now.

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Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict/Alien World: A fierce and bloody revolution ensues. TALIYA, FALLAG, and the rebellion defeat the evil warlord 1ONTAE and chase him and his forces out of the world. The rebellion sees the light of day after years of darkness.

Resolution/Alien World: Trevon helps TALIYA install his father FALLAG as the emperor and himself as the protector of the alien world. Peace is restored. FALLAG gives Trevon a message of peace and a long-lost truth he must take back with him and spread it among the people. Trevon promises.

Trevon PJ 19 / Sean PJ 8: As seconds trickle down, Trevon and Sean embark on their return journey to Earth.

Sean PJ 9: Sean’s return journey doesn’t end well. He loses his way and gets trapped in a distant forbidden world.

Deeper Layer: One cannot change or avoid a foretold prophecy. One can only embrace it.

Trevon PJ 20: Trevon returns to his earthly world, a completely changed person.

Deeper Layer: He has a new mission. He must fight for a greater purpose.

Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict/Earthly World: He runs against Reverend DuVernay in the elections. Exposes DuVernay’s dark side to the media and public.

Trevon PJ 21 / DuVernay AJ 11: DuVernay loses his power and his support. Gets defeated by Trevon in the elections.

Resolution/Earthly World: Trevon fulfills his father’s ambition and the promise he made to FALLAG. He spreads the message of peace and the long-lost truth among the people.