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Lesson 6
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43 Replies
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Subject line: Ashley’s Transformational Structure
I learned another story structure model. I’ve been working with the one through my university, but it’s interesting to explore other models.
Transformational Logline:
A secretive slave woman is the only one who can save her people from her lover, a Spanish conquistador, but she must use her terrifying superpower.
Change Agent:
Itzamna, a Maya shaman, is the Change Agent. In a shamanic journey in Act 1, he has seen two possible futures: one is negative and the other is ideal. He guides Malinche (“the One”) on her journey to create a better future. He goes through hell trying to change Malinche. She needs to own her gift to communicate with birds and use her voice to create positive change, but she is deathly afraid of standing out.
Transformational Character:
Malinche, a Mexica woman, also “The One” from a prophecy to save the Mexica people, who was sold into Maya slavery by her mother and stepfather as a child.
List out your Mini-Movie structure:
I didn’t want to attach my film outline, as it’s 29 pages. But I went through each scene thinking about the three gradients and escalating challenges. And overall, Malinche makes the Transformational Journey in the logline. Going forward, will need to find a way to integrate the “Betraying Character”.
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Interested in who the Betraying Character will be! Her Spanish conquistador?
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I was thinking it would be Jeronimo, a Franciscan friar, who was previously a Mayan slave. Jeronimo disapproves of “un-Christian” behaviors, and particularly, when Malinche starts to step into her power. But I like the idea of her Spanish conquistador being the “Betraying Character” too.
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Ashley, what a great conflict. I will love to see where this goes. And a pretty unique period of history. Does she have to lean more toward her people or her lover, it will be hard to make it a perfect balancing act. Nice.
Chris
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Thanks, Chris! That’s a great question. She will have to lean more towards her people. This will be challenging as she resents them for selling her into slavery as a child. Will be challenging to make this gradual shift from hating them to loving them. Will have to explore this further.
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Assignment 6 Transformational STRUCTURE
THE BASIC MMM
MM #1 – Pages 1 – 15 – Our hero’s status quo, his ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension:
Angry about wife’s death, gets easily pissed off by reckless drivers. Sees boy severely injured by a flying pallet(who later dies).
Change Agent: Judge Jason
Transformational Character: Judge Ken
Old Ways: Following the rules of the system, afraid of being overturned on appeals but does fiddle around with the Rotary Phone sentences.
The Vision: Inflict vigilante Justice on the offenders via the star chamber.
Challenge: Judge Jason already running a star chamber.
Weaknesses: Fear of the unknown. Not willing take the huge risk of the star chamber.
Turning Point: Call to Adventure.
MM #2 – Pages 15 – 30 – Our hero’s denial of the call, and his gradually being “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call:
The boy dies and he is ready to do something about it especially after the boy’s mother asks him to avenge his death.
Old ways: Anger and not doing enough about wife’s murder and the boy’s death.
Challenge: Judge Jason is taking care of vigilante business with the star chamber.
Weaknesses: Fear of getting caught, goes against everything he was taught about the law not having judge, jury and executioner in one role.
Turning Point: Locked in.
MM #3 – Pages 30 – 45 – Our hero’s first attempts to solve his problem, the first things that anyone with this problem would try, appealing to outside authority to help him. Ends when all these avenues are shut to our hero.
Can’t issue harsh sentences because cases get overturned on appeal.
Change Agent: Judge Jason expounds on the benefits of having alternate means of justice and it works.
Vision: The star chamber team is meting out justice.
Old Ways: Wimpy, ineffective legal procudures which are a joke to Jason and now Ken.
New Ways: Jason nudges Ken on to joining the star chamber.
Challenge: They bond over polaroid mug shot card club of the most insidious offenders and throw darts at the lucky winners.
Weaknesses: Could get caught. Maybe a double agent is on the star chamber.
Turning Point: Standard ways fail.
MM #4 – Pages 45 — 60 – Our hero spawns a bigger plan. He prepares for it, gathers what materials and allies he may need, then puts the plan into action — only to have it go horribly wrong, usually due to certain vital information the hero lacked about the forces of antagonism allied against him.
Joins Judge Jason’s star chamber. No before he joins Judge Jason’s star chamber what does he do? Rotary Phones and 364 day sentences but then Appeals Court rule Rotary Phones are cruel and unusual punishment.
Vision: Extacting justice via the star chamber.
Old Ways: Ken still a little nervous about getting caught and that it is wrong.
New Ways: Judge Jason keeps showing him the benefits of cleaning up the streets personally.
Turning Point: Plan backfires.
MIDPOINT: After cleaning a few bad drivers off the streets, the LilPutins seem to know their next moves. There’s a Judas in their ranks.
Old Ways: Ken chickens out on a star chamber raid he agreed to go on.
Challenge: Judge Jason gets shot because a LilPutin is waiting for him. Luckily it’s only the top of his ear lobe that gets skimmed but a lot of blood.
Weaknesses: Underestimated the fear in Judge Ken and the traitor or betrayer.
MM #5 – Pages 60 — 75 – Having created his plan to solve his problem WITHOUT changing, our hero is confronted by his need to change, eyes now open to his own weaknesses, driven by the antagonist to change or die. He retreats to lick his wounds.
More Rotary Phones and more 364 day sentences.
Turning Point: The decision to change.
Old Ways: Judge Ken apprehensive
Challenge: After seeing the benefits of what the star chamber is achieving he’s still a little skeptical.
Challenge: Might get caught and lose job and position.
Weaknesses: Underestimated the problem that LilPutins have penetrated the star chamber.
MM #6
– Pages 75 – 90 – Our hero spawns a new plan, but now he’s ready to change. He puts this plan into action…and is very nearly destroyed by it. And then…a revelation.
Joins the Star Chamber but then they are betrayed by a prosecutor working for LilPutin Kirill.
Turning Point: The ultimate failure.
Vision: Team is working together. Star Chamber has Ken now helping on raids.
Old Ways: Fear of getting caught and overturned.
New Ways: Kicking ass and taking names.
Betraying Character: Star chamber member leaks info on an upcoming raid and Jason gets shot.
Challenge: Not sure how bad the leak is and how much danger they are in.
Weaknesses: Fear of physical violence and getting caught and losing position in society as a judge.
MM #7 – Pages 90 – 105 – The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and he rejoins the battle with a new fervor, finally turning the tables on his antagonist and arriving at apparent victory. And then the tables turn one more time!
The star chamber deals with the traitor but almost get killed in the process, then go for MM8
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
Old Ways: Fear of taking vigilante action
New Way: Comfortable going on raids and exacting justice.
Challenge: Could get killed or caught.
Weaknesses: Not sure if this be will viable to keep going.
MM #8 – Pages 105 – 120 – The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat him, wraps up his story and any sub-plots, and moves into the new world he and his story have created.
They raid LilPutin’s mansion and kill him.
Turning Point: New status quo.
New Way: They have a united attitude of getting the really bad drivers reeducated/ off the road and taking care of their LilPutin handlers.
Profound Truth: Like in the movie the Punisher, “In certain extreme situations, law is inadequate, in order to shame its inadequacy, it is necessary to act outside the law. To pursue…Natural Justice. This is not vengeance. Revenge is not a valid motive. It’s an emotional response. No, not vengeance, punishment.”
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Chris- your story has really come together for me now. I think one of the judge’s key motivators is shame: the fear of losing his high position in society as a judge. I think that emotion will go a long way to propelling all kinds of risky actions.
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Thanks Bob!
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Interesting story coming together. I’m curious about the notion of a “star chamber.” From an online definition I can see where it was found in history, but does this sort of thing still exist?
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I don’t know if it still exists but remember we are dealing with fiction which requires suspension of disbelief. Michael Douglas was in a 1983 film called Star Chamber which has some interesting aspects but it takes 40 minutes to get moving.
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I guess that’s what I found intriguing and a little scary! Seems relatively easy to believe a star chamber could exist given the current political and “fake news” environment.
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Hi Chris,
Well done. It’s so clear. What an interesting story.
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Thanks Joan. Eons ago when I was a freshman at Michigan State, that burning bed story happened about 10 miles away from East Lansing-the one that got made into a TV movie staring Farah Fawcett. It was in the news constantly and everyone was thinking, well he got what he deserved. I think she still got convicted, my memory is a little fuzzy on that. Just checked it, she got acquited, thank God. And then there’s commentator more recently in the media who plays Independence Day (Reba McEntire) as bumper music as if it’s a Fourth of July song. Yeah, it happens on the Fourth of July as a metaphor but it is not about the country’s liberation from England but the abusive husband in the song. OMG. Anyhow, I find your story interesting.
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Thanks. It’s not a story for everyone. Because of that, I think I may have a tough time getting it made.
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What I learned: My script does not lend itself to the pages of the MM.
However, it improved greatly by using the text of the MM.
1. Logline: To atone for her mother’s death, a guilt-ridden counselor at a transition house must learn to deprogram a victim of domestic abuse while moving through the stages of excitement, doubt, hope, discouragement, courage and triumph or loss.
2. The transformational character is the counselor.
3. I used the MM structure.
4. I covered the gradients in the Profound model then deleted them because there were too many pages.
ACT 1
MM #1 Hero’s ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension.
She gets an eviction notice–Must have money by Jun.30th
MM #2 Hero’s denial of the call
Selma rips up the eviction notice. Hurls pieces into the bin.
Hero gets “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call.
Selma looks through job listings and finds the only suitable job is at the Blue Bird Transition House.
She goes for an interview and takes the job as a deprogrammer then goes to her mentor’s house to learn more.
Selma convinces Elizabeth to stay for three nights and come for counseling.
1<sup>st</sup> session goes well.
ACT 2
MMM #3 Standard ways fail. I don’t know why this is red. It should be in bold.
2<sup>nd</sup> session
Elizabeth gets upset and wants to leave.
Selma lies to Elizabeth to keep her in counseling and keep her from receiving more abuse or getting killed.
Elizabeth gets angry at the end.
Selma is upset with herself for making “such a mess” of the session.
#4 Hero’s plan backfires.
3<sup>rd</sup> session
Selma decides to have a session in the garden. She tries multiple ways to get through to Elizabeth, but she maintains that Mark is a good man who Elizabeth controls.
MM #5 Hero is confronted by the need to change. She retreats to lick her wounds.
Selma, a lonely figure, stares at the garden.
MM #6 Our hero spawns a new plan, but is very nearly destroyed by it.
She decides to tell Elizabeth something about herself. This is a change because Selma is a very private person.
Elizabeth discovers the lie. She is furious.
In escalating challenges, Selma makes change after change.
Selma decides she needs help to keep Elizabeth in counseling. She asks Elizabeth’s friend. This is a change because Selma never asks for help.
4<sup>th</sup> session
Selma gives Elizabeth the last of her wishes. Elizabeth is no longer angry.
Now that Elizabeth has her wishes, she decides she does not need more counseling.
Selma and Elizabeth’s friend discuss the ethics of plotting behind Elizabeth’s back. Then Selma asks the friend for even more help.
Selma is accosted by Mark. She calls the transition house for help. This is a change because she is asking for herself not Elizabeth.
If Selma had not asked Elizabeth’s friend for help with Elizabeth, Selma could not have made this change.
But she backtracks. When she is calmer, she regrets asking for help.
Selma and Elizabeth come together over their mutual loss after a teenager goes back to her abuser. This is a change because Selma does not allow herself to have friends.
6<sup>th</sup> session
Selma approaches Elizabeth more like a friend than a client.
When Elizabeth says she must go home, Selma pleads with her and tells her she could die.
Elizabeth says she does not care. Selma counters with “But I do!”
Selma is now in relationship with Elizabeth and it hurts.
The ultimate failure
Elizabeth decides she must go home.
Selma cries in the washroom.
She meets with her mentor and offers her resignation.
She is no longer concerned about privacy. She tells her mentor everything including her fear of men and their feet.
But when her mentor offers support, Selma will not admit she needs her.
Selma sees her chance slipping away and relents. This is another change. The reward? Selma finds a mother.
The mentor is about to be fired.
MM #7 The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and she rejoins the battle with a new fervor,
Selma realizes Elizabeth may still be at the house. She decides to try and save her mentor’s job.
ACT 3
Selma intercepts Elizabeth and pushes her to the brink.
Apparent victory
Elizabeth admits that Mark brainwashed her into believing she was mentally ill (gaslighting) and could not take care of her baby. Elizabeth gave away the baby.
The tables turn one more time.
Mark arrives and tries to kidnap Elizabeth.
MM #8 The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat her
Selma swallows her fear. She keeps him from leaving by holding on to one of his feet.
Mark is arrested.
The story wraps up any sub-plots. The hero moves into the new world she has created.
Selma earns the money and keeps her apartment.
Her mentor helps Selma understand that it was her father’s fault her mother died.
Selma continues to be a deprogrammer.
Selma and Elizabeth create a world-wide self-help organization for Survivors Of Domestic Abuse called SODA.
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Joan- I like how you were able to use the MM to create a cohesive structure to your play. Good clarity and flow. Well done!
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Thanks Bob. That gives me more confidence. I was concerned that my script didn’t fit the pages. For instance, Selma receives the eviction notice on page 2.
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I think Selma’s eviction notice comes at the right time, just a few minutes after you’ve established her ordinary world. It’s the inciting incident that sets all her subsequent actions into motion.
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I can feel the tension rising!
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Lesson 6: Bob’s Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is the value of using a Mini Movie structure to create an ebb and flow to my play. In addition, I learned that I can use a combination of the three gradients in a kind of ‘mix and match’ way to serve the story and stay true to a profound ending. This play is closest in nature to ‘Groundhog Day’ because in both, the protagonist takes a long time to make any changes.
Transformational Logline- After being humiliated and vowing his revenge, an overbearing, arrogant steward transforms from getting even to sincere remorse when he realizes his revenge has gone way too far.
Transformational Character- Malvolio (from ‘Twelfth Night’).
Mini Movie Structure-
Play starts in near darkness. (DOUBT) Malvolio relates to Feste, the Clown, that he has been kidnapped and thrown in a dungeon on completely false charges. Feste pretends to want to help (HOPE) but does not do so. (DISCOURAGEMENT) Malvolio moves from being angry to raging with revenge. (LOSS)
Fabian, the town’s baker, and one of the group of five who tricks Malvolio, feels remorse and when Feste leaves, he secretly unlocks the door (COURAGE) and runs away before Malvolio sees him.( TRIUMPH) Turning points- Feste makes amends; Malvolio gets free. He must talk to his mistress.
Malvolio makes his case to Lady Olivia that she wrote him the letter asking him to wear yellow stockings and cross-garters. (CONFIDENT BUT OVERBEARING) He thought she was in love with him. Instead, he was thought to be mad and locked up. (OUTWARD CONFIDENCE COVERS DEEP INSECURITY) She guesses that the letter must have been forged by her maid, Maria. She summons her and her new husband, Sir Toby, as well as Sir Andrew, Fabian, and the Clown and we hear their confessions. Turning point- Malvolio goes from angry to unrelentingly furious and vows his revenge.
Malvolio hatches his first plan of revenge (EXCITEMENT) against the letter-writer, Maria. He pays off a shady magistrate (DOUBT) who draws up a false document stating that Sir Toby is still married to a woman several towns away; which would make the newly pregnant Maria’s baby a bastard. (HOPE) Maria is besides herself with dismay.(TRIUMPH) Sir Toby cannot convince her it’s a forgery. Turning point- Malvolio relishes a victory over his hated opponent and he wants more. (Not yet on the road to transformation.)
Maria kicks him out of the house and Malvolio’s second revenge becomes clear: he hires a prostitute to proposition Toby at the local tavern, and Toby, now in a fragile state, agrees. (EXCITEMENT) Malvolio’s letter to Maria alerts him to the tryst (HOPE) and she is there to catch him before the act. (TRIUMPH) Two pounds of flesh extracted by Malvolio. Turning point- he begins to feel a touch of remorse, but is still carried away at the power of his plotting. (COURAGE IN A NEGATIVE WAY)
Sir Andrew’s weakness is greed. So, when Malvolio pays off an itinerant confidence artist (EXCITEMENT) to pose as a real estate mogul with a get-rich-quick scheme, he is not sure Andrew will bite at the ruse (DOUBT). When Andrew invests hundreds of pounds in the bogus operation, (TRIUMPH) it immediately closes down. Malvolio splits his ill-gotten gains with the con-man. Turning point- Though he feels revenged when Sir Andrew must beg Lady Olivia for a meal, a sense of vague sadness invades him. It’s his humanity. But he quickly squelches it (DOUBT) and moves on to the next stage of his revenge plan.
Feste is the court clown of Duke Orsino, who provides him with a life of ease. But Malvolio attempts to steal some of the Duke’s fine silver (EXCITEMENT) and then writes a letter to him placing the blame on Feste. (DOUBT) When the Duke accuses him (HOPE), Feste’s defense proves not believable and the Duke fires him. (TRIUMPH for Malvolio) The clown must now fend for himself. Turning point- Malvolio suddenly feels like perhaps the Duke’s punishment was too harsh, but rationalizes that Feste deserved it. (DOUBT)
Fabian, the baker, is the last person on Malvolio’s revenge list. He decides he only deserves a minor prank, namely sending a goat into his mill and bakery building to befoul it. But the goat turns over a lantern and sets the place on fire and it burns to the ground. (DOUBT) Fabian now has no way of feeding and housing his family and the entire town will have no bread. (DISCOURAGEMENT) Turning point- It is now clear what was once vague: Malvolio’s retribution has caused far more harm than any perceived good feelings. (FAILURE) The fire was the last straw. He is filled with remorse for the evil he’s done in the name of vengeance. Turning point 2- He vows to make amends.
Malvolio figures out a way to undo his deeds (EXCITEMENT) and then try to leave town quickly. (DOUBT) He delivers a lump sum of money to Fabian to rebuild his mill and bakery.(HOPE) He writes a letter to Feste the clown, Toby and Maria explaining his nasty tricks, and he returns half of Sir Andrew’s money back to him. (COURAGE, HOPE) He then rides off to a town far, far away. Malvolio has dropped his vendetta and learned a valuable lesson. Moreover, he no longer feels he must preen and pose to prove his worth. All in all, he is a happier man for it. (HOPE, TRIUMPH)
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Bob–It works!
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Thank you, Joan. It’s so exciting to me, since a week and a half ago, all I had was a vague idea asking myself, “Do you think the character Malvolio will really make good on his threat to get revenge on five people?”
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Your story is coming together nicely with the escalating revenge. I was thinking “YIKES!” Don’t get on the wrong side of Malvolio.
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Good advice, Marilyn.
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Bob, your story is really tight. I wonder if any of the folks in Stratford Ontario would bite on this or are they purists who would only put on the original Shakespeare? I don’t know much about plays but this is good stuff here. I’d pay money to see this play.
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Chris- That’s really kind of you. Please check out my Twelfth Night- A Rap-A-Dap-Tation on YouTube. My partner and I wrote this version for high school audiences and made a video with comic-book type illustrations to give producers a sense of what it would look like. Here’s the link: https://youtu.be/hggMD2U5-I0
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Bob,
I meant to tell you that I started watching this video. I like the novel way of bringing Shakespeare to young people. Who knows what doors that could open to creating our next great actors. So many possibilities. It was about 1 am and I had to stop before my face landed in the keyboard from a long day. A couple days after that the layoffs hit at the day job and I had to put writing on hold for a couple weeks while I looked for a job. I have a second interview in a couple of hours. It was a good learning experience to be in this class with you and everyone else. Hope our paths cross in the future.
Kind regards,
Chris Confer
P.S. not sure if you saw my little blurb about a class I had with the co-writer of Top Gun (1986) in our introductions, but it’s a pretty cool story regarding one of the last two classes I had to take at Michigan State to complete my Bachelor’s degree. I’ll paste it here to make it easy:
I had a course once with Jim Cash (Top Gun) on popular culture that he taught in his home. Michigan State University gave him a lot of leeway to do that as he was a local celebrity for having co-written Top Gun and several other scripts with Jack Epps Jr. His office was so large that it fit all 22 of his students pretty comfortably. It was really more of a giant family room with a Wurlitzer jukebox on one side and his desk on the other with couches in between. You should have seen his desk, it was about 15 feet long and he casually held court from behind it for the semester. It was a worthwhile course. The funny thing is that movies did not come up too often in the conversation. He did mention that was not real happy with how the Charlotte Blackwood (Kelly McGillis) character was cast. He wanted her to be stronger and more independent. He said the choice of nylons with the seamline on the back undermined his intent for the character. He also told us he had this little trick of not having to lend out movies to people because they often would not be returned. These were the days of VHS tape in the early 1990s. He would say, yeah, I don’t have it on VHS, I prefer Betamax because the picture quality is better. It was kind of funny. He was a producer at a local PBS station in East Lansing / Lansing before he got his break. He loved sports and everything popular culture. The course mainly focused on the 1950s and 1960s and we used a book called Populuxe.
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Hi, Chris-
Thanks for your comments about Twelfth Night- a Rap-A-Dap-Tation. I’m working on a 3-minute promo for it this week and next aimed at producers and educational institutions.
I’m sorry to hear about the layoffs. Good luck in your next step. I’ve always found that cliche to be true: when one door closes, another one opens up. It’s usually impossible to see in the middle of it, but, hang in there.
Regarding Jim Cash, it’s so ironic ‘that movies did not come up too often in the conversation.’
Good luck moving forward. And keep writing!
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Liz Janzen’s transformational structure…
What I learned doing this exercise is that this script is still very much a work in progress. I am grateful for how much impetus these exercises have given it after being stalled for some time.
The Emotional Gradient is Desired Change.
MM #1: 14-year-old Sally Moss loses her home and family in a fire and sets out on foot to find her aunt in San Francisco. Along the way she encounters a young man – Charlie – at a roadside diner who is kind to her. The same day she is taken up by Hollywood producer Herman Abrams and his wife Louise.
Challenge: her life is suddenly turned upside down. Weakness: vulnerability
Emotional gradient: loss; uncertainty; excitement
Turning point: setting out for a new life with Frances and the Abrams.
MM #2: Becomes the successful young star of the ‘Belle’ serial. Her life is managed by Aunt Frances and the studio (the Abrams). Re-encounters Charlie who is now bussing tables at the studio commissary.
Challenge: a career on the rise, Weakness: naivete; thinks she’s in control of her life.
Turning point: Sally is told she can’t continue to go out with Charlie after the tabloids spot them together.
MM #3: The Belle series comes to an end. Frances marries. Sally, now 18, is given a more mature role and works with a new director and an objectionable male co-star while Frances is away on her honeymoon. She tells Louise about the co-star’s behaviour but Herman declines to intervene – everyone needs the bankable male star to finish the picture.
Challenge: working with new people (without Herman’s protection/control). Weakness: inexperience with men; Herman’s failure to support her.
Turning point: Disillusion re the protective bubble she has been in.
MM #4: Sally makes it through the film, finding her own way of dealing with the co-star. When Charlie leaves LA to fight in the Spanish Civil War Sally is unaware he wanted her to see him off and he leaves thinking she doesn’t care for him. She doesn’t know it yet but Frances deliberately kept her from learning Charlie was leaving. She is offered a role in a film in England and goes there alone.
Challenge: encountering adult problems; Weakness: she is still impacted by the decisions of others.
Turning point: Leaves for England.
MM #5: Shoots the film in England without any of her old supports around her. WW 2 breaks out. She meets a wealthy young heir to an estate who is an officer in the Armed Forces. They fall in love.
Challenge: the war. Weakness: uncertain future for everyone.
Turning point: Romance
MM #6: After a whirlwind romance, Sally and the officer marry secretly. The UK press discovers it and jumps on the story. Overnight it breaks in America. Frances is disappointed Sally married without telling her. Frances confesses she was the one who kept the news of Charlie’s departure from her 3 years earlier, shocking Sally.
Challenge: learning of Frances’s betrayal. Weakness: deep disappointment in Frances, her trusted friend; the struggle to forgive her.
Turning point: Marriage
MM #7: Sally’s husband is sent to the Continent on a dangerous mission. Sally embarks on another British film. Her husband is declared missing in action. Frances and Sally reconcile.
Challenge: anxiety over missing status of her husband; Weakness: feels once again like she has no control over her affairs; helplessness.
Turning point: Husband missing
MM #8: Sally gets a telephone call from the War Ministry advising her the situation looks grim regarding hope for her husband. Sally reads between the lines: he won’t be coming back. A motorcycle driver arrives at Sally’s door with the telegram confirming his death. The messenger turns out to be none other than Charlie, who had no idea who he was delivering the message to.
New way: Sally and Charlie can pursue a future together.
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I’m a great fan of historical fiction, especially around this time period.
I like the way you keep escalating the challenges.
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Marilynne’s Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is… my story is coming together. I still have a difficult time not dwelling on details and editing!
Transformational Character: Dr. Chloe Black is a busy university professor whose area of expertise is maternal child health. She teaches and mentors many students as well as does research on programs for pre-natal care. From all outward appearances she is successful in her career, but lives a secret life of regrets.
Change Agent: Rosemarie (MeMe) Swenten – friend and colleague of Dr. Chloe – has many years experience as a home birth support nurse. She recently took her vows as a Buddhist nun and is now employed as a chaplain who provides counselling and support to new parents.
Transformational Journey / Logline: Unexpectedly Dr. Chloe leaves her position at the university to manage a new challenging health program in Africa, where she discovers the true meaning of her own life.
MMM STRUCTURE: MM #1 – Pages 1 – 15 – Our hero’s status quo, her ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension.
As a diligent university professor Chloe is busy teaching students and doing research. She feels trapped in her career and life and regrets some of her decisions along the way. She avoids finding out who she really is – her authentic self – keeping her brain on super drive by constantly checking her phone for the latest news, email, text and phone messages.
Her friend Rose Marie – a home birth support nurse – tries to help Chloe let go of her past and move on – maybe even help Rose Marie with a new project.
Turning Point: Call to Adventure: Chloe discovers she has been by-passed over for another key leadership position and doesn’t know which way to turn. Rose Marie convinces Chloe to take a leave of absence and join her in Africa managing a new project with pregnant women.
PROFOUND MODEL
EG – Excitement – Chloe is excited to embark on this project
AG – She travels to Africa and meets the doctors and health care workers she’ll be working with.
Challenge: The community is highly suspicious of her motives
Weakness: She projects an outward confidence that hides her deep insecurities and anger
MM #2 – Pages 15 – 30 – Our hero’s denial of the call, and her gradually being “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call.
Even though Chloe agreed to help with the project, all her doubts and anger continue to swirl relentlessly in her head. She constantly checks her phone and discovers the internet isn’t reliable. She feels like she’s stepped into one giant black hole without a safety net.
Chloe visits with a group of young pregnant women in the community and is taken aback at their fears they and their babies will still be at high risk of dying during childbirth.
Turning Point: Locked in: Chloe finally connects the statistics of deaths in childbirth with real people – her commitment to this mission becomes real
Emotional Gradient: Doubt
Action Gradient: Chloe visits pregnant women in the community and finds them skeptical of her abilities and particularly her lack of cultural awareness. <s></s>
Challenge: Success of their planned program seems uncertain and becoming more unlikely with each woman Chloe meets.
Weakness: Chloe aggressively pursues her goals but sometimes is unaware of culturally important details.
MM #3 – Pages 30 – 45 – Our hero’s first attempts to solve her problem, the first things that anyone with this problem would try, appealing to outside authority to help her. Ends when all these avenues are shut to our hero.
Chloe knows the program must change. She thought they could train local women to go out to rural communities and assess pregnant women before they were due. If they expected any complications, they would send the women to the birthing centre.
She appeals to the local midwives, who she has already alienated by not going to them initially to plan the program.
Turning Point: Standard ways fail – Her usual way of taking charge doesn’t work and Rose Marie continues to guide her to a place of letting the past go.
Emotional Gradient: Hope
Action Gradient: With the help of Rose Marie, Chloe begins to take specific steps to sort herself out. They engage with a local Buddhist nun and begin to find hope in local wisdom – both for the program and Chloe’s own life
Challenge: Chloe only believes in scientific evidence and has no faith in local practices and folklore
Weakness: Dismisses experiences of both the community and the women themselves.
MM #4 – Pages 45 — 60 – Our hero spawns a bigger plan. She prepares for it, gathers what materials and allies she may need, then puts the plan into action — only to have it go horribly wrong, usually due to certain vital information the hero lacked about the forces of antagonism allied against her.
Chloe plans for a bigger implementation – more communities and women participating.
Turning Point: Plan backfires. Rather than seeing an even greater success, Chloe finds more things go wrong – there are more emergency births, with more mothers and babies in danger of poor outcomes.
Emotional Gradient: Discouragement
Action Gradient: Chloe assists a woman who followed everything in the childbirth program she was supposed to, but the woman and her baby still die.
Challenge: No intervention or program will work 100% of the time.
Weakness: She is unprepared for when her grand program doesn’t work – mothers and babies still die.
MM #5 – Pages 60 — 75 – Having created her plan to solve her problem WITHOUT changing, our hero is confronted by her need to change, eyes now open to her own weaknesses, driven by the antagonist to change or die. She retreats to lick her wounds.
Chloe finally agrees she need local expertise to help her plan succeed.
Turning Point: The decision to change. When Chloe begins to listen to the local experts around her, she sees why her view of the situation has been wrong. She has to incorporate what’s worked in the past into the new strategies.
Emotional Gradient: Courage
Action Gradient: She goes on a safari where her resolve and courage are tested with a birth in a small remote village.
Challenge: Outside of her limited circle of co-workers, Chloe is a lone voice in a large community.
Weakness: Chloe does not appreciate the value of bringing in local “informal” leaders to make a significant change in this community
MM #6– Pages 75 – 90 – Our hero spawns a new plan, but now she’s ready to change. She puts this plan into action…and is very nearly destroyed by it. And then…a revelation.
A small, but powerful group of doctors and community health workers actively resist any changes, even if they might make a significant difference to pregnant women. Turning Point: The ultimate failure. It seems this small and powerful group are succeeding in turning others against Chloe and her plan.
She has a revelation that changes everything. One local doctor developed the current care delivery system and considers it his legacy. He is “deeply offended” by any outsiders (and in particular Chloe because she is not a doctor) coming in, changing his system and telling him what to do. Chloe did not appreciate how many loyal followers he had and how important his support was.
MM #7 – Pages 90 – 105 – The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and she rejoins the battle with a new fervor, finally turning the tables on her antagonist and arriving at apparent victory. And then the tables turn one more time!
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
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Emotional Gradient:Triumph
Action Gradient: Chloe recognizes an alternative destiny for herself and takes steps to expand the program to other communities on a more permanent basis.
Challenge: Despite program success, not all elders in surrounding villages are supportive and still need to be persuaded of the program’s value
Weakness: Has no doubts she can convince other leaders of her program’s value and expand the program
MM #8 – Pages 105 – 120 – The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat her, wraps up her story and any sub-plots, and moves into the new world she and her story have created.
Turning Point: New status quo.
Chloe and Rose Marie propose a new program at the local high school and a college in the city to train health care workers with a specialty in maternal child health care. Chloe stays to get the program off the ground which has great community support.
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Hi Marilynne,
I would love to see this as a movie. Where did this story originate? Are you a nurse or a doctor?
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Thanks Joan,
You’re right this story comes out of my experience – both as an ER/ICU nurse and health researcher. I’ve been fortunate to teach African graduate students who were keen to improve their heath care system.
So much to learn about being in another culture! Not sure my story reflects the anxiety, passion and excitement yet.
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From what I’ve read so far, I think you can definitely make that happen.
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Hope’s Transformational Structure
What I learned: This is was a great assignment to fill in the blanks, as well as discover and explore.
My transformational journey logline:
An entitled businesswoman intends to sell her inherited farm to save a failing company until she discovers the farm is the last chance for rescued livestock destined for the slaughterhouse.
Main character
Charlotte “Charlie” Piper (20s)
MM1: statue quo and call to adventure
Charlotte “Charlie” Piper is killing it, making real estate deals at her late father’s company. She’s 48% owner in this real estate holdings firm; her mother, Lois, is a 2% owner, and her stepmother, Amber, holds a 49% stake.
Charlie’s dream is to make her first million before age 25 and her latest deal could get her there — until her client is arrested for embezzling. Not only does Charlie’s big deal evaporate, but the company is now also facing bankruptcy unless it can come up with $3 million. This is all Charlie’s fault, points out Amber.
While Charlie contemplates Amber’s warning of a possible federal investigation into Charlie’s part in the fraud, she learns that she inherited her late Great Aunt Charlotte’s farm. Charlie decided selling the property to a developer will solve everything.
Change agent: Charlie
Transformational characters: The farm and it’s rescued donkey and goat; the neighbor vet; her mother and stepmother; the corrupt local developer
Old ways: Entitled, afraid of the animals, impatient, city girl
The vision: At this point: Sell and get back to the city.
The challenge: Charlie is out of her element and has a chronic illness.
Weaknesses: Fear of the animals, unwell, facing bankruptcy or worse.
MM2
Charlie arrives at the farm and discovers it’s rundown and an old donkey and old goat are in the barn! She’s afraid of the animals, yet now she must also find new homes for this odd pair before she can sell the farm.
She meets Dr. Jed Mack, DVM, who’s been caring for the animals and explains that her great aunt saved them from the slaughter house. They immediately clash, and she begins calling developers in the area.
The developers refuse to talk to her when they realize what farm she’s trying to sell. Her stepmother calls to check on her progress, tells her that the lawyers and feds are circling and the company will be bankrupt by Christmas if she doesn’t find a way to sell the farm. Charlie’s mother, an aging self-absorbed B-actress, arrives unannounced and says she’s staying.
Change agents: The farm, Dr. Jed
Old ways: Entitled, afraid of the animals, impatient, city girl
The vision: At this point: Sell and get back to the city.
The challenge: She can’t find a buyer..
Weaknesses: Her mother arrives unannounced; she has little time till all is lost.
MM3
In spite of herself, Charlie makes friends with the donkey and the goat. Her mother, Lois, begins TikTok’ing donkey meditation videos. Charlie finds her great aunt’s diary, which includes cryptic information about someone out to take over her farm.
A developer and local politician, Daniel Clark, shows up and offers a pittance for the property. Charlie rejects the offer, and Daniel warns that his deal will be the only one coming. Step-mom/boss Amber arrives to stay and get the farm sold.
Change agent: The donkey and goat; her step-mother.
Old ways: She’s still seeking a buyer, just not Daniel.
New ways: Charlie rejects Daniel’s offer, because she recognizes he’s sketchy.
The challenge: She still must pay off the debt.
Midpoint: With Amber’s arrival, Charlie has more pressure on her to sell but not with her best interests in mind.
MM4: Charlie forms a new plan
Charlie contacts big-city developers, but none of them are interested. One knows of Daniel and tells her to be careful. Amber and Daniel go out on a date, and Amber offers to help Daniel close the deal with Charlie.
Lois’ donkey meditation videos go viral and Dr. Mack convinces Charlie to take in a second abused donkey.
The local city council announces a new roadway to connect to the interstate along with an industrial park, to make the city more attractive to big business and bring in millions.
Charlie counters the initial offer from Daniel because of the projected revenue. He says, too late: The industrial park will cover Charlie’s farm and Daniel, as the city council appointee, tells her that they’re condemning the farm and invoking eminent domain to get her land.
New ways: Charlie now cares for the donkeys and goats, no longer afraid of them.
Challenge: The city invokes eminent domain.
MM5: Charlie retreats and the antagonistic forces prevail
The local paper announces the deal and local citizens are excited to have their dying town get a second chance. Charlie goes to the local City Hall meeting and is shouted down and labeled an outsider. Dr. Jed accuses Charlie of destroying the memory of her great aunt.
Lois continues her videos, and she and Amber seem to make up after all the years of clashing constantly over their shared/awkward history with the same man. She then convinces Lois to sell her the 2% stake in the company, ostensibly to help restructure to stave off the bankruptcy.
But instead Amber sells Daniel that 2% stake: Now she and Daniel are majority owners in Charlie’s late father’s company! She gives Charlie two options: a crippling lawsuit if she can’t repay the debt within 48 hours OR Charlie can sell the farm to them.
Charlie’s illness hits her hard, and lands her in bed. Her doctor tells her to walk away from the farm for the sake of her health and well-being.
Old ways: Charlie is still eliminate the debt from the fraud.
New ways: She fights back; she’s growing to love the farm.
Challenge: Her chronic illness strikes and the doctor advises her to get back to the city.
MM6: Charlie’s bigger, better plan
While in bed, Charlie reads more of her great aunt’s journal, including how she fought City Hall and won 40 years before. She asks her mother to let her speak to her TikTok followers about the crisis on the farm – and the help needed ASAP.
The video goes viral, too, and people begin to flock to the farm the day before Christmas Eve. Some bring their power tools and lumber; others bring buckets and paintbrushes.
Charlie gets out of bed and together the crowds begin to clean and repair and make the farm spotless. Even the donkeys and goat are spruced up for Christmas.
Amber and Daniel are furious. The next day, after everyone has left, they call in the bulldozers.
Old ways: Amber and Daniel team up to get the farm.
New ways: Charlie asks for help from her mother – as well as crowds of helpful strangers.
Weakness: Charlie has to face down bulldozers.
MM7: Crisis and climax
Charlie, with Dr. Jed, stand their ground and face off with the bulldozers. Daniel calls in his cronies on the City Council as well as on the local police force. Lois gets on TikTok.
A truck and trailer are called in to take the donkeys and goat away, with Amber claiming the animals are being neglected because Charlie’s too ill to take care of them and had earlier said she didn’t care if they ended up in bottles of Elmer’s Glue. The donkeys take aim at Amber’s and Daniel’s backsides.
Charlie pulls out her great aunt’s journal. Her great aunt had discovered evidence of an ancient burial site on the farm. She contacted the local historical society, as well as a nearby scholar of area indigenous peoples. The farm, the experts announce, is a sacred, vital link to the region’s past. The City Council is forced to give up!
New ways: Charlie calls on Dr. Jed, as well as the great aunt’s journal, for help.
Vision: She beats back the city council and prevents the farm from ever being developed.
Weakness: She’s still facing bankruptcy.
MM8: Charlie’s new status quo
Now spring, the farm continues to look beautiful. But now Lois’ Donkey Meditation classes include rows of humans at the farm participating. A baby donkey frolics among the attendees, as do some baby goats.
Dr. Jed and Charlie are obviously a thing now, and the sign out front announces the farm and donkey and goat rescue.
New way: Charlie is living out her great aunt’s legacy of an animal rescue, as well as living her best life in the country.
Profound truth: By addressing the greatest needs around us, we can fulfill our life’s real desires.
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Vivien’s Transformational Structure.
What I learned doing this exercise is that a movie is made up of segments, which are mini movies. In a transformation structure, the main character in each segment – change agent of transformational character – develop their arch through experiencing the three gradients. Each segment ends with the main character facing a turning point and is required to raise their game to succeed. The turning point is a hook to engage the audience in the hero’s transformational journey.
I see that the mini-movie structure is akin to Paul Gulino’s sequence approach, albeit the mini movie model puts more emphasis on the transformational journey and change agent.
1. Transformational Logline
“A headstrong woman begrudgingly agrees to help her family conceal the sudden death of her brother from the elderly mother, but her stubborn way creates havoc in the family until she learns to seethat life has many shades of grey.”
2. Main characters
Change agent: Father.
Transformational Character: Alicia
Antagonist: Mother
3. Emotional Gradient:
Desired Change for Change Agent, Father.
Forced Change for Transformational Character, Alicia.
Forced Change for Antagonist, Mother.
4. Mini Movie Structure
4.1 Mini-Movie 1 – Status Quo and Call to Adventure
We start in a media office where Alicia is an esteemed journalist. She is fiercely independent, rational, scientific, and lets her ethical beliefs guide her action.
Alicia leaves work to pick up her mother in LAX. Mother comes to California from Australia to celebrate the 100<sup>th </sup>birthday of Grandma.
Mother is a total opposite to Alicia. Family is Mother’s life. She makes decisions based on feelings, hence, she’s often perceived as irrational from her family. Mother is deeply religious, and she believes in reincarnation, spirit, and ghost.
Mother and Alicia don’t see eyes to eyes despite their deep love for each other.
Alicia and Mother are at Grandma’s. Father calls to inform Alicia that her brother Anthony died from a sudden brain aneurysm. He asks Alicia if they should donate Anthony’s organs as the hospital requested. Alicia says it’s the logical decision to make.
Father tells Alicia to bring Mother home urgently, but she must keep the news secret for fear Mother would collapse on the way home.
Change Agent: Father
Transformational Character: Alicia
Old Ways: Rigid. Focused on facts. True to a fault.
The Vision: Father wants to protect Mother.
Challenge: come up with a convincing story about Anthony.
Weakness: does not know how to deal with emotional situation. Alicia approaches a situation with her mind, not her heart.
4.2 Mini Movie 2 – Locked Into Conflict.
Alicia lies to Mother that she must go back to Sydney urgently to report to Centrelink, the Australian Social Security body, otherwise they’d stop her pension.
Mother wants Alicia to find an alternative solution. She does not want to leave before Grandma’s birthday because she fears she won’t see her ageing mother again.
Alicia tells Mother she must go home. Mother feels dejected. She reproaches Alicia for not trying hard enough. The two get caught in frivolous arguments, which cause stress to both and to the frail Grandma as well.
Alicia flies to Sydney with Mother for Anthony’s funeral. She makes up another lie to justify her trip to Australia.
Old Ways: Lack of tact. Short temper.
Challenge: This may be the last time Mother sees Grandma. She wants to celebrate Grandma’s birthday and spend time with her.
Weakness: Alicia has lived away from Mother for 12 years and does not have strong relationship with Mother. She thinks she needs to solve the problem by herself, and fail to ask others – Mother’s sister, Grandma, or Father – for help.
4.3 Mini-Movie 3 – Hero Tries to Solve Problem – But Fails.
Alicia arrives in Sydney with Mother. Father informs her that he’s had Anthony cremated. He has decided not to tell Mother about Anthony’s death because he fears it would cause a total meltdown in her.
His decision shocks Alicia to the core. As an esteemed journalist, Alicia follows a strict code of conduct which calls for the observation of the truth, fairness, and ethics in all dealings.
Alicia rebukes Father’s decision. She reaches out to people Mother respects – the family Buddhist temple’s Abbott, Mother’s GP, Mother’s best friend – and asks if they would help deliver the news to Mother. They all decline.
Father tells Alicia that sometimes it’s better to be kind than to be true. He asks her to be patient with Mother, and to stand by the family through the crisis.
Alicia begrudgingly agrees but informs Father that when she goes back to California in a few days, she will stay away from it all.
The next day, the family secretly go to Lam Son temple, without Mother, to lay Anthony’s ashes to rest. In the middle of the ceremony, they see Mother wander nearby. Alicia’s quick thinking distracts Mother and convinces her to go home.
Later at home, Mother wants Anthony to come over for dinner. In the spur of the moment Alicia says that Anthony has moved to Vietnam. He was accepted in a medical internship program and would there for six months.
Mother is incensed that Father did not discourage Anthony to move to Vietnam. She thinks that doing his internship from a ‘poor’ country like Vietnam may jeopardize his medical career in Australia.
Change Agent: Father.
Transformation character: Alicia.
Vision: “It’s better to be kind to Mother than to be true.”
Old Ways: Rigid. Judgemental. Refusing to lie to Mother. Denouncing Father’s decision as unethical.
New Ways: making up the story that Anthony moved to Vietnam for his internship.
Challenge: Father wants to hide Anthony’s death from Mother. It’s a family tradition that seeks to shield vulnerable family members from adverse situations.
Weakness: Alicia is out of touch with her family’s tradition, which she perceives as outdated and unethical.
4.4 Mini-Movie 4 – Hero forms a New Plan
Mother is surprised when Alicia discourages her from going to Vietnam, stating that it’d be difficult to meet him because he moves around constantly for his work.
Mother fears that the lifestyle maybe too strenuous for her son. To appease Mother, Alicia doctors Anthony’s pictures to show him enjoying in life in postcard-like areas in Vietnam.
Anthony’s pictures give Mother solace. She recognizes one area as her village of birth and asks for Anthony’s address so she can connect him with relatives who are still living there.
Alicia sees that the family has no way out with this lie. She pleads with Father to tell mother the truth. Alicia reminds Father that she must go back to work next week and will no longer be able to help him.
Father suggests that they think of ways to help Mother cope before Alicia leaves Sydney. She argues that the truth doesn’t change with time, and that it’d be better to deal with it sooner than later.
In the meantime, Mother finds out that the village where Anthony lives is very remote and that none of her relatives still live there. She feels nervous to ‘abandon’ Anthony in the ‘middle of nowhere.’
Guilt weights on Alicia. Desperate to atone, Alicia arranges for Mother to be with Anthony’s spirit, hoping that it will appease her anxiety.
Against her own belief and Father’s blessing, Alicia brings Anthony’s urn of ashes home, lying to Mother that it’s her birthday gift for Grandma. Mother falls instantly in love with it.
That night, Anthony’s spirit leads Mother to the basement, where his belongings are kept. She sees his broken eyeglasses and shudders with what she perceives as a bad omen.
Mother is certain that misfortune is awaiting Anthony, and that he needs the family’s protection. She insists that Father brings Anthony home. Father feels overwhelmed with anxiety. His asthma exacerbates.
Alicia extends her stay another week to give Father support. His health declines as Mother becomes more erratic. Alicia feels increasingly agitated. She questions why Father chooses to suffer in silence.
Change Agent: Father
Vision: think long term. Finds ways to help Mother cope before revealing the news to her.
Old Ways: Obsessed with the truth. Inflexible. Impatient.
New Ways: gives Father benefits of the doubt.
Challenge: Mother pressures Father to bring Anthony home.
Weakness: As a logical problem solver, Alicia fails to see the emotional side of a problem.
MIDPOINT: Alicia ignores Father’s suggestion for a long-term solution and makes unilateral decision in dealing with Mother’s anxiety, which backfires spectacularly. Now she is facing with both parents’ declining mental health and her own.
4.5 Mini-Movie 5 – Hero Retreats and the Antagonism Prevails
Alicia has coffee with Mother in Vietnamese town. Mother overhears a woman at the next table lament that her son married a Vietnamese woman he met in Saigon and decided to settle there.
At dinner, Mother wants to talk to Anthony to find out the truth for his moving to Vietnam. Alicia discourages her, stating that telecom is very poor in the village.
Mother suspects that Alicia is covering up for Anthony. Perhaps he’s with a woman in Vietnam. Alicia protests Mother’s irrationality. Sparks fly. Father intervenes to make peace. He advises Alicia to have compassion for Mother and be gentle with her.
Alicia feels exasperated with Mother’s regular outbursts. Her fake photo project doesn’t work, her lies are turning her family up side down. She pleads with Father to let her tell Mother the truth. He begrudgingly relents, realising that Alicia is not coping well.
The next day, Father experiences a mild heart attack on the street and is hospitalised. The doctor wants to keep him overnight to monitor him. Father calls Mother and lies that he’ll spend the night with a friend.
Father tells Alicia to keep his hospitalisation secret. Alicia rebels. She refuses to continue to disrespect Mother by keeping her in the dark about important matters in her family. She suggests that Father learn to trust Mother.
The next day Alicia takes Mother to visit Father. Mother gets hysterical. She chastises Father for neglecting his health and gets angry at him for lying to her. She’s on edge that his condition might worsen.
Father tries to appease Mother in vain. He gets distraught. His condition takes a dip. The doctor wants to keep Father another night in the hospital. Mother gets frantic. Alicia panics. She no longer knows the right thing to do.
Alicia begins to understand why Father doesn’t want to tell Mother bad news, but she sees no solution. She feels trapped and falls into depression.
Change Agent: Father.
Old Ways: Respect is vital in relationship. To respect is to be true to the person you love.
New Ways: Love is key in relationship. You must protect the person you love.
Challenge: Father loses his position as head of family when Alicia unmindfully takes over. Mother’s anxiety grows as she loses Father’s support.
Weakness: Alicia improvises as she goes along but makes decisions without regards to her family’s deeply rooted way of life.
4.6 Mini-Movie 6 – Hero’s Bigger, Better Plan!
Mother asks Alicia for details of the medical clinic where Anthony interns. Alicia makes up the information. She’s certain that Mother can’t trace it because she doesn’t know how to use the Internet.
Mother wants to book a ticket to Vietnam to visit Anthony. Alicia and Father discuss a plan to ask a travel agent Father knows to discourage Mother from going to Vietnam.
The agent tells Mother that there’s a breakout of avian flu in the region Anthony lives, and that the Vietnamese government has imposed a lockdown in the region.
Mother is terrified. She demands that Father requests Anthony’s medical school to bring him home immediately.
That night Anthony’s spirit visits Mother. In her dreams she sees Anthony at the temple, heading towards the Ash Memorial Hall. Mother talks about her dream to the family.
Alicia believes that it’s inevitable to tell Mother the truth soon. Father agrees. He believes that Anthony gives the family the signal that Mother need to know. Father suggests that they come up with some ideas to keep Anthony’s memory alive.
Alicia proposes that they contact Anthony’s organ recipients and his best friend.
Old Ways: make up lies for a quick fix.
New Ways: tell the truth with compassion.
Challenges: time is the essence. Alicia risks losing her job if she stays in Sydney longer.
Weakness: Alicia has no control over how helpful her new contacts are.
4.7 Mini-Movie 7 – Crisis & Climax
Alicia extends her stay in Australia again. Her manager advises her that she’ll need to pass on Alicia’s high-profile project to her colleague. With a heavy heart, Alicia agrees.
Alicia contacts Anthony’s lungs recipient. She had died shortly after the transplant. He body rejected the new lungs. Alicia gets in touch with Anthony’s liver recipient. He’s experienced organ rejection symptom on and off and is in the hospital now.
Alicia approaches Jesse, Anthony’s heart and last organ recipient. Jesse said that he’d surrendered when he received Anthony’s heart. He’s grateful that Anthony allows him to live to see the birth of his first child. Alicia promises that her family will give him support.
Anthony’s roommate tells Alicia about Anthony’s girlfriend, Cindy, who Alicia never heard of her. When Alicia meets Cindy, she understands why Anthony hides her from Mother.
Cindy is a free-spirited young woman, with bright red hair and a pierced nose. She’s six months pregnant with Anthony’s child. Alicia tells her that Anthony has died. She promises that her family will embrace Cindy and her son as their own.
Alicia tells Father about her encounter with Cindy. They are both ambivalent on how to introduce Mother to Cindy but agree that the grandson may be Mother’s saviour.
At home, Mother looks sorrowful but is much less combative. She goes out every day and does not come home until before dinner to cook for the family.
One day Mother reproaches Anthony for going to Vietnam without consulting her then disappearing without a word. She vows to never mention his name again until he comes back and apologizes. She tells Alicia to go back to her job in California.
Father finds Mother’s attitude unusual; Anthony could never do wrong with her. Then he realizes that Mother might be angry and giving him the silent treatment. He thinks that he and Alicia must act fast before Mother reverts to her volatile temper.
Alicia and Father are discussing plans to introduce Jesse and Cindy to Mother when Mother’s best friend calls. She tells them that Mother is at Lam Son Temple. Alicia and Father rush there to prevent Mother from going to the Ash Memorial Temple.
Alicia calls Jesse and Cindy, pleading with them to meet her at the temple. When everybody arrives, they see Mother walking out of the Ash temple. She looks lethargic, her eyes puffy red. She knows! They are too late.
Father holds Mother in his arms, apologizing for lying to her. They break down in tears. This is the first time Alicia sees Father show his grief.
Alicia introduces Jesse to Mother. He gives Mother a stethoscope to listen to his heart. Mother cries tears of gratitude. Father also listens to Jesse’s heart. He feels at peace. Their son’s spirit will be with them for a long time to come.
Alicia introduces Cindy to Mother. She tells Mother about her and Anthony’s unborn son. Cindy lets Mother listen to the baby’s heartbeat with the stethoscope. The women cry in each other’s arms.
Old Ways: Stubborn. Think with mind, not heart. Can’t deal with uncertainty.
New Ways: Seeks compassionate solutions that resonate with Mother.
Challenge: Anthony’s lungs recipient died.
Weakness: Alicia doesn’t know if the resolution will be long lived.
1.1 Mini-Movie 8 – New Status Quo
After the family come home from the temple, Alicia asks Mother how long she’d known the truth. Mother confided that she knew about it a week ago. She’s been visiting Anthony at the temple every day and the Abbott prayed with her each time she was there.
Mother says she didn’t want Father or Alicia to know that she knew because she did not want to cause them grief to see her suffer. Alicia is confused at the same time in awe with her parents’ sacrifice to protect their family. They are both much stronger than she is.
Everyone feels relieved for being able to mourn Anthony properly.
The following day the family gathers for a farewell lunch for Alicia. She’s leaving for California tomorrow. Cindy and Jesse are special guests at the lunch. Mother loves them like her own children.
The parents talk about the good memories of their son. Cindy shares her romance with Anthony. Jesse says that Anthony is his newborn’s godfather.
After the guests leave, Alicia promises to see her parents regularly.
Mother confesses that she would have lost her will to live had she been rushed into accepting Anthony’s death. Father confides that he had suicidal thoughts but stayed strong for the family. Now he finds a will to live again.
The family goes to the temple. Alicia organises a ceremony for Anthony with his ashes and framed picture on the altar. Cindy is invited along. The Abbott chants a heart-warming song. Everyone looks peaceful. Outside flowers bloom.
New Ways: The family unites in crisis and comes out of it wiser, more compassionate, and with a stronger bond.
Profound Truth: Compassion is the deepest form of love.
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JD’s Transformational Structure
I learned a new story structure: the Mini-Movie structure. I had never heard of it before, so it is nice to add another tool to the toolbox.
MM #1
It’s the middle of the night, and Jake the treasurer hunter is digging up a cemetery plot from an abandoned mining town. He recovers a buried chest marked, Nevada Assay Office. He loads the chest into the back of his ’74 Ford Bronco. Jake is interrupted by a man claiming that Jake is on his land. They fight, but Jake gets the upper hand. Jumps in his Bronco and takes off. The landowner makes chase. A Park Ranger and a Sheriff join in the chase. Jake eludes everyone and disappears into a 4-wheel-drive Bronco Stampede.
Later, Jake is eating a steak in a dark booth of a quiet restaurant. He’s joined by a sponsor trying to enlist his help to recover pirate treasure in the Bahamas.
Transformational Journey: A solitary treasure hunter falls in love with a mermaid, but must sacrifice his treasure — and his love — to save the mermaid’s home.
Transformational Character: Jake the treasure hunter
Change Agent: Lana the mermaid
Old Ways: Jake is a rugged, confident, and womanizing treasure hunter who is out for himself and doesn’t really care who might lose out. He is a loner and also a little immature; “finders keepers, losers weepers.”
Emotional Gradient: Thrills, excitement, selfishness, greed
Challenge: Find and keep the treasure
Weakness: Disregard for right and wrong
Profound Truth: For Jake, “Finders keepers, losers weepers.”
Turning Point: Call to Adventure.
MM #2
Jake is hesitant. He does not know how to scuba dive, but more importantly, he does not know anything about Calisto, the new contact in Nassau. At first he declines, but after having trouble fencing the silver from his last job, he feels pressured into taking this new one.
New Ways: Taking in a partner to work with.
Emotional Gradient: Doubt, hesitation, anxiety
Challenge: Learn to scuba dive. Learn to trust Calisto.
Weakness: Paranoid
Turning Point: Locked in.
MM #3
Jake goes to Nassau. Meets Calisto. Researches the treasure. Hears a legend about evil sirens who rule the waters around the islands. Takes scuba diving lessons. Sees what he believes to be a mermaid. It startles him and he panics. Struggles to ascend. Scares him enough to almost give up. Calisto starts giving off bad vibes.
Emotional Gradient: Thrills, excitement, selfishness, greed, panic
Challenge: Figure out what is really go on around here.
Weakness: Insecurity
Turning Point: Standard ways fail.
MM #4
Befriends a local and starts hearing all the stories about lost treasures and islands haunted by sirens. Starts leaving Calisto out of his plans. Begins exploring various islands and cays. Meets Lana the mermaid. Becomes enamored. Spends more time being with Lana, rather than hunting for the treasure. Calisto and his sponsor back in the States start questioning his ability to find the treasure.
Vision: Who is this mermaid? I have to get to know her better.
Old Ways: Jake is a rugged, confident, and womanizing treasure hunter who is out for himself and doesn’t really care who might lose out. He is a loner and also a little immature; “finders keepers, losers weepers.”
Emotional Gradient: Lust. Excitement. Temptation.
Challenge: Learn more about Lana
Weakness: Lust
Profound Truth: Business can wait.
Turning Point: Plan backfires.
MM #5
Jake finds out another group of amateur treasure hunters have landed in the Bahamas. Jake accelerates his hunting activities. Jake finds an artifact. Then finds the treasure trove. Lana finds out what he is really doing in the Bahamas. She is furious. Explains it is her home. Explains the danger if the public finds out about the location of her treasure. Jake tries to buy time to conceal Lana and the treasure from Calisto.
New Ways: Confused. Still wants the treasure for himself but starts feeling conflicted because of his attraction to Lana.
Emotional Gradient: Confused. Conflicted. Love is starting to overpower lust.
Challenge: How to keep the girl AND keep the treasure.
Weakness: Greed and ego.
Turning Point: The decision to change.
MM #6
The other treasure hunters find some wreckage and figure they are close to finding the treasure trove. Jake devises a plan to throw them off the trail. He tells Lana he needs some treasure from her home. She tells him it is impossible, but he tries anyway, and is attacked by evil sirens.
Vision: If I get rid of the competition, I can make this all work out.
Emotional Gradient: Devious
Challenge: Throw the competition off the trail to the treasure.
Turning Point: The ultimate failure.
MM #7
Lana rescues Jake from the sirens. She brings some worthless items to the wreckage site and helps Jake bury it and cover their tracks. Jake cons Calisto into leading the other treasure hunters to the false treasure trove. They think they have beaten Jake. They salvage the treasure only to find out that it is worthless. The sponsor is fed up and cuts off any more funding to Jake or the other treasure hunters. The other treasure hunters go home empty handed. Jake knows he has to forget Lana, so he says goodbye and leaves the islands.
Vision: Jake’s treasure hunting is putting Lana at risk, so he must give up the treasure, and give up Lana.
Emotional Gradient: Loss. Despair, but hopeful.
Challenge: Make everyone forget about the treasure. And learn to love Lana from afar.
Weakness: Never felt this way before; but love is actually becoming his strength. Coming to terms with his new sense of compassion.
Profound Truth: Letting go is one way of saying, I love you.
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
MM #8
Six months later: Jake is working with a group of archeologists and a legitimate artifact recovery operation. He has a new mermaid tattoo.
Vision: Jake can enjoy working legitimately; and works to return lost artifacts to their rightful owners.
Old Ways: Jake is a rugged, confident, and womanizing treasure hunter who is out for himself and doesn’t really care who might lose out. He is a loner and also a little immature; “finders keepers, losers weepers.”
New Ways: He becomes compassionate and learns to return lost possessions to their rightful owners. Even after saying goodbye to his forever love, he learns to be sociable and enjoy the company of others.
Emotional Gradient: Compassionate and open
Profound Truth: Letting go is one way of saying, I love you.
Turning Point: New status quo.
Post-credits:
Back at the islands we see Calisto approaching Lana’s home and the real treasure trove. He is attacked by sirens and dragged into the darkness.
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Connie’s Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is…my story is coming together quickly! This model is amazing =)
Transformational Logline.
After losing her high-flying corporate job and feeling like a total loser, 47-year old Layla time travels back to the 1800’s, finds herself on the brink of war, falls in love with a charming solider and herself amidst powdered wigs and waistcoats.
Change Agent: Millie, Layla’s younger sister. She has a young family, and encourages her sister to leave the big city for a few weeks, and acquaint herself with a small town, slower life as a way to distract herself.
Main Transformational Character: Layla, a single woman in her late 40’s, recently fired from a corporate role she was married to. Now, feeling worthless, she visits her sister in an effort to distract herself from her life – but instead, finds herself trapped in the 1800’s with no obvious way back to her modern life.
MMM STRUCTURE
MM #1 – Our hero’s status quo, her ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension.
After leading a massive product launch for a company she’s been with for a decade, Layla believes she’s getting a huge raise and title change. Instead, she finds out she was thrown under the bus by her co-worker/lover and then comes to learn she is being restructured out of the company. Feeling lower than she’s ever felt, Layla heads out of the city to visit her sister in a quaint small town. Layla arrives during a historical re- enactment weekend, and in an effort to distract her sister, Millie encourages Layla to get dressed up and join in the local re-enactment. During a tour of a historical pioneer house, they stumble upon a mystical portal and are teleported to the 1800’s. They are in disbelief!
Turning Point: Call to Adventure
PROFOUND MODEL: The 3 Gradients: Forced Change
Emotional Gradient – Denial
Action Gradient – Layla cannot believe she has just been fired, she’s still in disbelief that her co-worker/lover threw her under the bus, and now, she’s been teleported back in time, and knows no way to get back. This can’t be happening!
Challenge Gradient: Layla is stuck in the grief of what was and she struggles to be in the present moment.
Weakness Gradient: Trying to put on a brave face, trying to solution or ignore the root of the problems that are arising; fear + total loss of control
MM #2 – Our hero’s denial of the call, and her gradually being “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call.
Despite the apparent evidence that they have time travelled and the need to fit in with 1800’s society to avoid detection, Layla remains skeptical. With no technology and no clear solution, Millie urges Layla to try to assimilate until they can find a way back. Luckily, they are dressed in re-enactment clothing.
Turning Point: Locked in.
PROFOUND MODEL:
Emotional Gradient – Anger
Action Gradient – Layla is angry as she is still processes her job loss and now accidental time travel (loss of life-as-she-knew-it); she’s sarcastic, gives her sister a hard time, has an aggressive attitude; she’s rebelling against a ‘man’s world’ now that she is in the 1800’s and women have very few rights.
Challenge Gradient – Stuck in her own anger, unable to see beyond her problems/sadness/grief and gives Millie a hard time about her solutions to their time travel problem; Layla is also recognizing how dependent she was on her work identify as her self-value; she’s now questioning everything.
Weakness Gradient – Victimhood
MM #3 – Our hero’s first attempts to solve her problem, the first things that anyone with this problem would try, appealing to outside authority to help her. Ends when all these avenues are shut to our hero.
While walking around the grounds of the house they were originally touring, Layla and Millie are mistaken for job applicants and are offered staff positions in the house. Despite her initial cynicism, Layla decides to blend in and accepts a job as a maid for the wealthy homeowner, Andrew. Meanwhile, Millie becomes an assistant to Robert, the head chef.
Striving to fit in, Layla befriends another maid who offers her a tarot reading; Layla accepts the offer out of desperation. The tarot reader provides her with sage advice, but it’s not what Layla wants to hear, leading her to dismiss it and feel worse than before.
Turning Point: Standard ways fail.
PROFOUND MODEL:
Emotional Gradient – Bargaining
Action Gradient – Trying to assimilate to life in the 1800’s, Layla and her sister work at jobs to fit into society, yet are desperate to return home to their century; they make friends but the lifestyle is very difficult and they miss their loved ones and their modern day items.
Challenge Gradient – Will they be stuck here forever? They are not blending in well and are trying every avenue possible to ascertain how to time travel back home.
Weakness Gradient – Fear of never returning back home.
MM #4 – Our hero spawns a bigger plan. She prepares for it, gathers what materials and allies she may need, then puts the plan into action — only to have it go horribly wrong, usually due to certain vital information the hero lacked about the forces of antagonism allied against her.
Layla impresses Andrew with her outstanding work and skills, receiving appreciation and compliments she had longed for at her previous workplace. Millie informs Layla of a local scientist experimenting with time travel, while Layla reveals that Andrew’s on-staff astrologer has offered to help her. Although Millie is suspicious of the astrologer, Layla is sure that this is the right route for them and insists on trusting him over the scientist. The astrologer turns out to be a fraud with ulterior motives and tries to seduce her; Andrew walks in on them and gets the wrong impression. Now, the scientist is skittish and refuses to meet, Millie is upset with Layla, and the sisters still have no way home.
Turning Point: Plan backfires.
PROFOUND MODEL:
Emotional Gradient – Depression
Action Gradient –Romance and friendships are fun, but there are little arguments brewing between Layla/Andrew, and Millie/Robert, highlighting differences between the eras, both women are missing home. Layla has an emotional breakdown after being tricked by the astrologer, and the sisters incur another failed attempt at leaving the 1800’s
Challenge Gradient – Everything is going wrong. No idea how to leave this era, this adventure had it’s moments of fun, but now, how do they leave?
Weakness Gradient – Grief, losing hope.
MM #5 – Having created her plan to solve her problem WITHOUT changing, our hero is confronted by her need to change, eyes now open to her own weaknesses, driven by the antagonist to change or die. She retreats to lick his wounds.
Layla realizes she was too pushy – and pushed away her sister, and their options to return back in time. She’s still trying to control the uncontrollable instead of responding and allowing, instead of surrendering and trusting. She realizes this is the same pushing she’s been doing for a decade and it’s gotten her nowhere.
Andrew checks in with Layla, she breaks down and shares the whole truth of who she is, where she’s from and how she needs to get home. With nothing more to lose, Layla leans into being vulnerable. Andrew is smitten.
Turning Point: The decision to change.
PROFOUND MODEL:
Emotional Gradient – Acceptance
Action Gradient – Feeling like she has no other choice, Layla opens up Andrew, tells him the whole story in the hopes that he can help. She risks it all by being vulnerable and sharing her true feelings.
Challenge Gradient – Everything is going wrong. No idea how to leave this era, Millie is upset. Layla realizes how she has been pushing and fighting for so much in life.
Weakness Gradient – Grief, losing hope.
MM #6 – Our hero spawns a new plan, but now she’s ready to change. She puts this plan into action…and is very nearly destroyed by it. And then…a revelation.
Layla apologizes to Millie and they move forward with drafting up another plan to leave the 1800’s. They head back to the scientist; he reluctantly agrees to let the sisters use his prototype machine. They are rushing him, he’s nervous, he makes a mistake and nearly destroys his machine, causing it to let out loud sounds and go up in flames. It’s at this moment that Layla’s memory gets triggered and she remembers the course of actions that cause them to time travel.
Turning Point: The ultimate failure.
MM #7 – The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and she rejoins the battle with a new fervor, finally turning the tables on her antagonist and arriving at apparent victory. And then the tables turn one more time!
Layla and Millie are ready to travel back, they remember how they got to the 1800’s and set themselves up to return, but not before asking Robert and Andrew if they want to come with them. They both agree but Andrew ultimately pulls out and almost ruins it for everyone, calling the local police to arrest Layla. Layla, Millie and Robert travel back to modern day in the knick of time.
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
MM #8 – The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat her, wraps up her story and any sub-plots, and moves into the new world she and his story have created.
Upon returning back, Layla has undergone a transformation – to someone less self-absorbed and in victimhood, now confident, empathetic and self-aware. She promises to be a more attentive sister and heads back to the big city in a convertible, reading to embark upon the next chapter of her life.
Turning Point: New status quo.
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Connie-
I like how Layla struggles and struggles against her own transformation until she is backed into a corner and feels compelled to change. That struggle is what I think will make the audience root hard for Layla to have things turn out the way they did. Nice work!
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Thank you so much @Bob!
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BRENDA BODDY, TRANSFORMATIONAL STRUCTURE
What I learned doing this assignment…I was still confused on the last assignment of where those gradients went and how to use them. Then when I put them in the outline below, I was able to dig a little deeper and come up with more substance to my script. Still don’t know if I’m doing it right and I’m pretty sure no one else is going to understand my outline, but it’s improving.
PROFOUND TRUTH: Karma is the only one who can stop Thamia from ruling creation.
LOGLINE: A demi-goddess in NYC is tutored by a magical lion to master her powers and stop Hades’s daughter from ruling creation.
EMOTIONAL GRADIENT: FORCED CHANGE.
MM #1 – Pages 1 – 15 – Our hero’s status quo, his ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension.
Karma likes the neighbor and is taking care of her nana. OLD WAY – Doesn’t know who she is.
Turning Point: Call to Adventure. She is attacked by Thamia.(PG 10), then attacked again (PG 15).
WEAKNESS: She doesn’t know who she is. CHALLENGE: To accept she has powers.
DENIAL:
MM #2 – Pages 15 – 30 – Our hero’s denial of the call, and his gradually being “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call.
Turning Point: Locked in. KIT, a white lion, instructs Karma on trying out her power. Karma is in denial until her encourages her to ‘just try’. She finds she can change inanimate objects. She now believes she has some power but…
WEAKNESS: She’s not effective or strong with her powers. CHALLENGE: To learn to use her powers correctly.
Thamia strikes again and Karma is whisked up to meet her day (Zeus).
MM #3 – Pages 30 – 45 – Our hero’s first attempts to solve his problem, the first things that anyone with this problem would try, appealing to outside authority to help him. Ends when all these avenues are shut to our hero.
Karma meets her father, ZEUS, who is eager to start teaching her the ways of a goddess. Kama refuses, determined to go home because her nana relies on her. Zeus sends Kit to mentor her.
WEAKNESS: Karma is timid and ineffective with her powers. CHALLENGE: To be competent enough to win battles.
ANGER: I don’t have an anger situation. Could Karma be upset about being pushed so hard? The expectations? Too much time away from Nana? Zeus being a bossy dad when he wasn’t in her life before? What does she resent?
BARGAINING: Karma doesn’t feel like she has Zeus’s powers. She wants to carry an object with her that she can turn into a weapon.
Turning Point: Standard ways fail. Kit has helped Karma, but now she’s out of time. Thamia is after the Godstones. She’s tasked with getting Zeus’s.
MM #4 – Pages 45 — 60 – Our hero spawns a bigger plan. He prepares for it, gathers what materials and allies he may need, then puts the plan into action — only to have it go horribly wrong, usually due to certain vital information the hero lacked about the forces of antagonism allied against him.
Karma goes after Zeus’s Godstone and ends up getting beat up. NOTE: Karma did not know about Kerberos. Can his metamorphosis freak her out?
WEAKNESS: Karma isn’t a good fighter and she see’s things as they are…not the danger they might be. CHALLENGE: To suspect danger in every interaction with Thamia and her sidekick, Kerberos.
ANGER: Could anger be used at this point? At herself for failing? At Zeus for not telling her about Kerberos? At being thrust into a dangerous situation that she doesn’t want?
Turning Point: Plan backfires. Karma doesn’t get the Godstone. (Should Karma get some fighting tips from her dad here?)
MM #5 – Pages 60 — 75 – Having created his plan to solve his problem WITHOUT changing, our hero is confronted by his need to change, eyes now open to his own weaknesses, driven by the antagonist to change or die. He retreats to lick his wounds.
Karma gets full information on Poseidon’s Godstone. No surprises. She is able to retrieve it.
HOPE: This feels like she gets hopeful about life, but this is part of a different gradient.
Turning Point: The decision to change.
Her nana dies during Thamia’s invasion to the final Godstone.
DEPRESSION: Montage of depression? Does Sobin go downtown alone? When does Sobin argue with Zeus?
Karma realizes she is the only hope to stop Thamia. She goes after her.
Thamia attacks Karma and she works with Zeus to fight Thamia off. NOW SOBIN KNOWS ABOUT THAMIA AND ZEUS.
MM #6
– Pages 75 – 90 – Our hero spawns a new plan, but now he’s ready to change. He puts this plan into action…and is very nearly destroyed by it. And then…a revelation.Karma feels she needs Zeus with her to succeed.
Karma, Zeus, and Sobin actively seek out Thamia, but Thamia kidnaps the neighbor 0
WEAKNESS: Karma has one Godstone (Poseidon’s), Thamia has two.
Karma is mortal, Thamia is immortal.
CHALLENGE: To rescue Samantha.
Zeus and Karma manage to get Sobin out of there and rescue Samantha, but Zeus is severely damaged and must heal. REVELATION-Karma doesn’t need him. She can do this herself.
Turning Point: The ultimate failure..
MM #7 – Pages 90 – 105 – The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and he rejoins the battle with a new fervor, finally turning the tables on his antagonist and arriving at apparent victory. And then the tables turn one more time!
Karma goes after Thamia and Kerberos to save Sobin. She injures Thamia and kills Kerberos and the hounds of hell in a fight on the Statue of Liberty. But then…Thamia gets the final Godstone.
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
MM #8 – Pages 105 – 120 – The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat him, wraps up his story and any sub-plots, and moves into the new world he and his story have created.
Sobin is injured. Karma is choked and left for dead. But…she finally believes she is a goddess. She manifests the full power of Zeus and destroys Thamia.
New way – Believes in her DNA.
Turning Point: New status quo.
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Chhimed Drolma’s Transformational Structure
WHAT I LEARNED DOING THIS ASSIGNMENT
…is to dig much deeper in my character journeys and find ways for them to fail, fail, fail, and then rise to the occasion heroically.
TRANSFORMATIONAL LOGLINE
A traumatized and lonely space mercenary is compelled to rescue a familiar child and finds peace and family in the process.
MAIN CHARACTER
Transformational Character, A.V.
MINI MOVIE STRUCTURE
MMM1: V goes to the elevator madness job, sees little girl who looks like her. Is practical and doesn’t want to go after the girl like D is trying to convince her because she has a job to do.
MMM2: Locked into finding the girl due to meeting C who will only help with keeping things quiet with the client if V finds the girl.
MMM3:
V tries all her contacts to no avail. Out of desperation, bottom of the barrel, Velvet tries her ex A for help which is humiliating.
MMM4:
A betrays V once again, taking the money to deliver the girl to Q. V comes to realize how important this girl is to her and that she’s lost her chance at finding her AND lost her self-respect.
MMM5:
V freaks out, not knowing where to go, what to do, and is triggered into not trusting anyone, even her crew and close friend D. W confronts and challenges V to go within. V meditates, talks with her inner BG, is empowered by her.
MMM6:
V moves forward with a new plan to reach out to the girl in meditation. During their meditation connection, she sees flashbacks and recalls her lost memories. She loses it so intensely she can’t quite get the girl’s location though she reached out to her and told her she was coming to help her. Now with their connection broken and Velvet’s trauma taking over, she feels frantic to save her. Velvet brings her memories to her inner BG who helps her integrate them with all her talents and skills.
MMM7:
Velvet reconnects with the girl, finds her, instructs her in what to do, and also is able to view Q which allows her to bring her crew and C in to the fight to save this girl and bring down Q. V also sees two other people like her in meditation and connects with them.
MMM8:
V finds and rescues the girl. V has a final fuck you moment with A. The two other people are waiting at her ship when she arrives back with the girl. They have a family reunion of sorts and discuss what their future will look like together. V gathers with her crew, gets soft with them, then they train together.HAVE I COVERED THESE?
The Transformational Journey listed in your logline – YES
***The Three Gradients***
The Forced Change Emotional Gradient – YES
The Action Gradient –
The Challenge / Weakness Gradient – YES
Is it sequenced in Escalating Challenges – YES
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Tom’s Transformational Structure
What I learned… this lesson took me a really long time because it exposed so many gaps that I was aware of and unaware of in my story. I made it through the first four mini movies and came to a screeching halt. After reimagining the second half of my story, I was finally able to proceed, and now that this structure is built into the outline I really feel like I have a better grasp on not just what the transformational character is going through, but all the characters, as well as the the story arc itself.
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