Lesson 7

[BG]

Action Lesson 7: Map Out Your Story

ASSIGNMENT

BG’s Story Map!

What I learned doing this assignment: Now that I have weaved together the Mission, Villain and Action tracks, the Action steps appear few and far between!!! I need more dead bodies, shootouts and car chases. Hard to make a cerebral hero do things he doesn’t want to do. I’m wondering whether I should switch to the thriller genre, where people can just sneak around in the dark without killing anyone. Or, figure out a way to work in a car chase on top of a train, or something;)))

A CLUB FOR PATRIOTS

THE PLAN: The Villain’s plan is in place before the movie starts and the Hero wanders into that plan, not knowing what he is getting into.

It is a conspiracy, codenamed NORTHSTAR, to pump weapons and militants into MALDOVINIA, where rebels are battling government forces. The conspirators want to turn the protracted insurgency into a full-blown land war in the middle of Europe and disrupt piped natural gas supply, so that they can sell expensive LNG (Liquefied Natural Gas) to Europeans.

The conspiracy is led by BILLIONAIRE, a man of immense wealth, who uses his media empire as a weapon in his crusade to fight off any challenge to the Western-led world order. His second-in-command is ENERGY MOGUL, another billionaire. He wants Germans to stop buying cheap, piped natural gas and buy, instead, his five-times more expensive LNG.

ACT 1:

1. OPENING

Mission 1: HUMBLE AND HEART-BROKEN: In a modest brownstone in the suburbs of DC, a young man is under a kitchen sink, fixing his elderly neighbor’s leaky plumbing, when the building manager walks in to deliver a fat envelope. The young man slides out, holding a big wrench. He is REPORTER, an engineer–turned–reporter, who has been dumped by the love of his life and is unable to get over it.

The neighbor lady and the building manager crowd around the sad young man, trying to cheer him up. She tries to interest him in freshly-baked brownies. The building manager says, “Wow, what a big envelope! Mysterious! Aren’t you going to open it?” As he holds it against the light and tries to see what’s inside —

Action 1: WEAPONS OF WAR: — we cut to a remote airfield in MALDOVINIA, where a combat drone circles overhead like a giant prehistoric bird. In front of open hangar doors, weapons of war, tied up on pallets, are being unloaded from the cavernous bowels of a cargo plane.

Villain 1: CONSPIRATORS’ MEETING #1: This is being monitored in real-time on a wall-sized screen in the St. Michael conference room of a posh London club named A Club for Patriots. Screens and fancy equipment everywhere. You might think you were in the situation room at the Pentagon.

Five very powerful men sit around a table, discussing their operation, codenamed NORTHSTAR, to start a war to gain control of energy supplies.

Their leader is BILLIONAIRE, a man of immense wealth, who uses his media empire as a weapon in his crusade to fight off any challenge to the Western-led world order. His second-in-command is ENERGY MOGUL, another billionaire. His needs are pecuniary and easier to understand. He just wants bigger markets to sell his expensive LNG (Liquefied Natural Gas) to.

2. INCITING INCIDENT

Mission 2: THE TIP: Back in his own flat, REPORTER examines the contents of the fat envelope: Blurry photos of an important-looking man in evening wear, an imposing building, and some bank statements. A few reverse-image searches, and in no time at all, he has identified —

Villain 2: BILLIONAIRE: — BILLIONAIRE and his posh club in London, named A Club for Patriots. There is ton of information on the Internet about BILLIONAIRE: his philanthropy, his foundation, his speeches at Davos…

Mission 3: EDITOR WANTS A SCOOP: Next morning, REPORTER shows the material to his editor, named EDITOR, who thinks this is definitely a tip worth investigating. He’s excited. A scoop like that could put his small, weekly magazine on the map.

REPORTER is only going through the motions, he’s in his own world of pain. EDITOR snaps his fingers. “Okay, time to snap out of it. The world doesn’t revolve around you. I want you to hop to London and get me a story! And keep it cheap, no French restaurants on company dime!”

Mission 4: HACKER HELPS: Before flying to London, REPORTER shows the material, via secure video-link, to HACKER, a friend who lives in London. They conclude from copies of the bank statements that money is being pooled to finance a nasty operation, and that someone is trying to stop it by sending this tip. REPORTER is not interested, he’s got his own issues. He says, “Yeah, yeah, the world is full of nasty stuff, let’s just stick to getting a story.”

Mission 5: FIRST ACTION: CASING THE JOINT: REPORTER flies to London, gets a room at a cheap hotel, and the next morning goes to the club in the photos. A gold name plate, hiding behind climbing ivy, announces ‘A Club for Patriots.’ Very discrete. It screams, If you don’t already know, you don’t belong here.

Mission 6: HOSTESS HIRES: While REPORTER looks around, a big, beautiful woman catches up, calling out, “Hi! Don’t you remember me? I’m HOSTESS, I work at The Club!” He doesn’t remember, but allows himself to be hired by her on the spot as a waiter.

Mission 7: INITIAL PLAN: SNOOPING FOR A SCOOP: That night REPORTER plots with HACKER over video-link how he should ingratiate himself with BILLIONAIRE so that BILLIONAIRE will want to keep him around to serve him. REPORTER tells HACKER he hates to lie, but he studies for his interview with BILLIONAIRE.

Villain 3: REPORTER MEETS BILLIONAIRE: Next morning, at The Club, he meets BILLIONAIRE, who takes a shine to him — REPORTER can speak French and knows the labels of 200 most expensive wines!

Villain 4: CAUGHT SNOOPING: But the ingratiate–for–access plan backfires before it starts, because BILLIONAIRE spots him near the St. Michael conference room and bans him from the floor.

3. END OF FIRST ACT — TURNING POINT

Action 2: BREAK-IN: So he needs to make a new plan to investigate the conspiracy. He moves up the ladder of deception: He jerry-rigs a listening device, climbs in through an open window, and plants it in the thermostat of the St. Michael conference room.

ACT 2:

Villain 5: CONSPIRATORS’ MEETING #2: As BILLIONAIRE and the other conspirators have a heated meeting about the funding of operation NORTHSTAR —

Mission 8: DISCOVERY: — REPORTER, in his car, listens via his jerry-rigged listening device. He discovers that the conspirators are planning an operation codenamed NORTHSTAR that will pump in weapons and militants into MALDOVINIA, where separatists are battling government forces. Their goal is to turn the protracted insurgency into a full-blown land war in the middle of Europe and disrupt piped natural gas supply, so that they can sell expensive LNG (Liquefied Natural Gas) to Europeans.

Mission 9: GETTING EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED: REPORTER is upset and pissed. He calls EDITOR, over an encrypted connection, to report his findings. He’s emotional, he seems out of his funk now: He blurts out, Just who are these men who feel entitled to start wars and consign so many to destruction and death for their own purposes?

Villain 6: MONITORING EVEN ENCRYPTED COMMUNICATIONS: Unfortunately for him, NSA Keyword Monitoring Programs pick up on his careless use of the word NORTHSTAR and an alert goes out. At CIA, Langley, DEPUTY DIRECTOR FOR EASTERN EUROPE meets with underlings. They are not only aware of NORTHSTAR, but they are covertly supportive. He tells staffers NSA has warned them that the press may be onto NORTHSTAR. They decide to alert BILLIONAIRE via MI6 and other cutouts.

Villain 7: MI6 RAID: Six agents from MI6 show up at dawn to sweep the St. Michael conference room. No bugging devices are found. BILLIONAIRE looks relieved. ENERGY MOGUL mutters quietly under his breath — he still thinks REPORTER is involved somehow. HOSTESS leaves quickly —

Mission 10: SHE’S A SPY!: — and walks fast to her car with her large Gucci bag slung over her shoulder. In her car, which she keeps parked in a remote spot of a major retailer’s lot, she sets up an unusual-looking laptop and some equipment, and sends an encrypted message to her control, GERMAN AGENT. They establish a secure link and talk. She reports the MI6 agents’ dawn visit and says she’ll have to figure out a way to deflect suspicion away from ‘the mule.’

Mission 11: PUZZLED AND SUSPICIOUS: Meanwhile, MI6 agents’ dawn visit to sweep for bugs has created excitement among the kitchen staff. When REPORTER walks in for his shift that morning, a waitress rushes to him and gushes, “They were everywhere, Monsieur! But they didn’t find anything!” REPORTER at first looks concerned, then relieved and surprised. His eyebrows go up slightly — brain whirring, puzzle pieces jumping around, assembling themselves into a coherent picture. He spots HOSTESS approaching. He hastily moves behind a group of workers to avoid being seen — he’s gotten suspicious of HOSTESS.

Villain 8: ASSASSIN HIRED: That afternoon ENERGY MOGUL arranges a meeting in the park with ASSASSIN, known as hitman for the rich and famous. As they walk under the trees, ENERGY MOGUL is limping. He complains to ASSASSIN about his gout, about BILLIONAIRE, about REPORTER, and then, he hires him to incapacitate REPORTER — without authorization from BILLIONAIRE. “Just break every bone in his body, but don’t kill him — BILLIONAIRE doesn’t like attention drawn to his club!”

Mission 12: HOSTESS PLANTS EVIDENCE: That night, HOSTESS again sits in her car with her unusual-looking laptop and some equipment and sends an encrypted message to her control, GERMAN AGENT. She then plants evidence remotely into the transatlantic data stream, implicating HACKER, in order to deflect Intelligence agencies away from REPORTER.

Action 3: DEPUTY DIRECTOR ORDERS AN ABDUCTION: NSA monitoring programs latch onto the fake information planted by HOSTESS in monitored transatlantic communications. At CIA, Langley, DEPUTY DIRECTOR FOR EASTERN EUROPE again meets with underlings to discuss the legal advantages of capturing a foreign citizen as opposed to an American reporter. They decide the law permits abduction of a foreigner for national security purposes. DEPUTY DIRECTOR says, “Getting an American reporter would create legal issues. No such impediment to the abduction of a foreigner for national security purposes! I want HACKER in the safe house by tomorrow!”

4. MID-POINT

Action 4: ABDUCTION: Scottish moors. A black MI6 van speeds toward a dark, lonely-looking house, looming in the distance. In the van, HACKER lies unconscious with two boxes full of his electronic equipment by his side. An American rendition team sits in front.

Mission 13: APPARENT DEFEAT: Meanwhile, REPORTER keeps trying and can’t get through to his friend HACKER. He leaves his room with some tools. He climbs up to HACKER’s flat – seems he’s getting used to this. He jimmies open a window, and goes in. He finds it ransacked. And all of HACKER’s electronic equipment are missing.

Action 5: FIGHT: On the way back to his hotel from HACKER’s ransacked apartment, REPORTER is ambushed by ASSASSIN. He tries to fight off ASSASSIN, a professional hitman. He finally pushes him off his center of gravity, toppling him down. While ASSASSIN is down, he kicks him unconscious. Then, REPORTER kicks again — he’s really pissed! He bends down and whispers, You attacked the wrong waiter, didn’t you?

Action 6: SUSPICION, SURVEILLANCE and DISCOVERY: Next morning, REPORTER is really cold toward HOSTESS, who has come to the kitchen to talk to him. He evades her attempts to talk.

That evening, REPORTER follows HOSTESS to the parking lot. Inside her car, HOSTESS starts setting up her secure laptop and her gear on the passenger-side seat. REPORTER looks in through the window. He recognizes the equipment – their images had zipped by on his screen while he was researching listening devices in his hotel room. He knocks on the window. HOSTESS looks surprised, but moves her gear to her lap and unlocks the door. REPORTER slides into the passenger seat and says, Why don’t we talk here?

Mission 14: A NEW ALLY: In the car, REPORTER confronts HOSTESS, who admits to being a German agent. She tells him they are working for the same goal: to stop a war. She tells him there are many Germans opposed to paying high energy prices to accommodate Western geopolitical ambitions. She admits that it was she who sent him the tip, and that she removed his listening device to protect him. (But she does not tell him that she caused HACKER’s abduction!) She offers to help REPORTER find his missing friend: “You help me, I help you!”

Villain 9: TORTURE: Meanwhile, at the remote CIA safe house, DOCTOR reports HACKER has been interrogated, he’s in bad shape, and insists he didn’t hack or send any hacked materials to REPORTER. STATION CHIEF does not believe. She tells DOCTOR to keep on trying.

Mission 15: NEW PLAN: The attack on him and his friend’s disappearance have caused REPORTER to realize he needs a new plan. He brainstorms and decides staying as a waiter at The Club is no longer safe or useful. He writes a letter to BILLIONAIRE, confessing and apologizing for working at his club under false pretenses in order to get an interview with him. Then, he moves in the night to a different cheap hotel to hide out.

5. END OF SECOND ACT — TURNING POINT

Mission 16: EXTREME GUILT FEELINGS: Next morning, he also tenders his resignation to HOSTESS, and invites her to lunch. They eat under some old trees to avoid satellite surveillance. HOSTESS tells him interagency chatter indicates HACKER is being interrogated (euphemism for tortured) at a desolate CIA safe house in the Scottish Moors. REPORTER is horrified and blames himself for involving his friend in such a dangerous operation. His heart is broken — again.

ACT 3:

6. CRISIS

Mission 17: DILEMMA AND PERSUASION: In another move up the ladder deception and violence, REPORTER decides to rescue HACKER — from what is, in essence, a government prison. He asks HOSTESS for help. She points out that it would be a very high-risk operation.

REPORTER tells her that he has a plan for stopping NORTHSTAR. “A nice, bloodless plan,” he tells her, “where we don’t have to kill any of the bad guys. Let the Goliaths kill each other. But I absolutely need HACKER to be able to do it. Since you also want to stop NORTHSTAR, will you help me rescue him?”

7. CLIMAX

Action 7: BATTLE AT THE SAFE HOUSE: HOSTESS agrees — they are a team now! Using tools and a plan made by him, REPORTER, HOSTESS and HOSTESS’s contacts carry out an elaborate rescue operation to break HACKER out of the CIA safe house. HACKER is spirited away to an undisclosed location.

Action 8: ASSASSIN ATTACKS AGAIN: After the safe house operation, on his way back to his new hotel where he’s hiding out, REPORTER is again attacked by ASSASSIN, wielding a taser this time. HOSTESS, who is secretly following him to protect him, flies out of the shadows and flattens ASSASSIN with a body-slam!

Action 9: STOPPING A KILLING: REPORTER stops HOSTESS, who’s sitting on ASSASSIN, from crushing his rib cage and lungs, saying, “Wait, let’s not close that door!”

Mission 18: NEW PLAN: Now that HACKER is safe, REPORTER asks HOSTESS for help to put NORTHSTAR out of business. REPORTER has made a plan to stop NORTHSTAR: “Take away their money, and what is left? A bunch of preening old men, trying to rule the world! And since my hacking skills are nowhere near what the job requires, can you set it up so that HACKER participates?” She agrees and arranges HACKER’s participation via secure video-link from the undisclosed location.

Mission 19: FOLLOW THE MONEY: REPORTER, HOSTESS and HACKER, participating via video-link, hold a brainstorming session to refine REPORTER’s original plan to put NORTHSTAR out of business.

Action 10: A HACKING OP: REPORTER and HOSTESS, together with HACKER participating via video-link, conduct a major hacking operation to divert the conspiracy’s 20 billion dollar NORTHSTAR funds and make it look like one of the conspirators did it.

8. RESOLUTION

Villain 10: CONSPIRATORS’ MEETING #3: Next day, BILLIONAIRE holds an emergency NORTHSTAR status meeting. He’s breathing fire: His daily review of accounts shows the 20 billion dollar kitty is no longer in the secret NORTHSTAR account. After a heated discussion, with recriminations flying around and ENERGY MOGUL on the defensive, BILLIONAIRE terminates NORTHSTAR.

Villain 11: ARRANGING A HIT: That night, BILLIONAIRE finds evidence in the accounts that a lot of the NORTHSTAR money has moved to accounts controlled by ENERGY MOGUL. As if bringing unwelcome attention to the group wasn’t enough! He calls ASSASSIN to arrange a walk in the park.

Villain 12: A WALK IN THE PARK: BILLIONAIRE tells ASSASSIN, Your contract with ENERGY MOGUL regarding REPORTER is cancelled! He hires him for twice his usual fee to kill ENERGY MOGUL instead.

Villain 12: CLEANING UP THE MESS: Then, BILLIONAIRE goes into clean-up mode in order to protect his reputation and the rest of his plans. He calls REPORTER’s editor and tells him he’ll give an exclusive interview to REPORTER.

Mission 20: THE INTERVIEW: During the interview, BILLIONAIRE gives his ‘the things we must do to defend the Western-led world order’ speech, tries to find out how much REPORTER knows, and blames it all on ENERGY MOGUL. REPORTER’s questions are mild and respectful. But there is change in the air. The balance of power between the two has shifted. After REPORTER leaves, BILLIONAIRE looks unsettled. He continues to stare, like a malign bird of prey, at REPORTER’s empty chair.

Villain 13: ASSASSIN DELIVERS: Next day, there is a major commotion and emergency vehicles at the entrance to ENERGY MOGUL’s townhouse. A gurney is carried out. CORONER tells the gathered reporters he was found dead in his bed. CORONER attributes it to sudden cardiac arrest due to excessive colchicine, a medication he was taking for his gout.

Villain 14: LIKE IT NEVER EXISTED: That night, the floor of a hidden room behind St. Michael Conference Room suffers a sudden structural failure and collapses. As the resulting fire from broken gas pipes destroys NORTHSTAR documents and equipment —

Mission 20: HUMBLE AND HAPPY: — we cut to a fancy restaurant nearby, where REPORTER and HOSTESS/GERMAN SPY toast each other with a medium-priced French wine. He is happy and animated. A guy who never smiled, is smiling and laughing again. His heart has healed!

[Patricia Steffy]

Patricia’s Story Map

What I learned doing this assignment is that often the mission track and the villain tracks are often part of the main action track already — which I think is a good thing because I want the action and the hero to be nearly entirely entwined. I am rethinking some of the action sequences — for example, SEG is the basement, but would it make more sense to have it at the top of the tower. The layout of the prison is something I want to keep brainstorming, I think, as it very much impacts the logical action of the movie.

Opening

Action 1: Hero (Donovan) fights an ambush of law enforcement near his survivalist dugout in the forest.

Mission 1: Donovan grabs a hatchet, but when he can kill, he stops himself. The fury drains out of him. He drops the hatchet and is arrested.

[Time Jump]

Inciting Incident

Villain 1: With the storm only 12 hours away, Sykes convinces the Warden to leave the men of the protective custody unit and SEG behind — saving the prison $3 million in fines — with the added bonus of further torturing our hero who only had days left on his sentence.

Action 1: Panic sets into the yard, as rumors of who is being left behind swirl. A kid awaiting trial gets into a fight with one of the jittery inmates.

Action 2: Brian, an inexperienced guard, grabs for his gun and accidentally shoots one of the older inmates. The yard is put into lockdown. The kid is taken to SEG. The older inmate is removed from PCU and taken to the hospital. But all eyes turn to Brian, who is riddled with guilt.

Mission 1: Donovan (our hero) finds a way to calm those who want to go after Brian. There is no mistaking the tension.

First Turning Point at end of Act 1

Villain 1: The warden is ordered to get all prisoners with less than a week on their sentences onto the buses for an early release by the Governor. Sykes is pissed, and he taunts Donovan. It’s the last bus out. Sykes will ride the steps.

Mission 1/ Villain 2: Donovan could be free, he chooses not to get on the bus. He warns Sykes not to take the bus out — that it is too late. But Sykes refuses to listen.

Mid-Point

Action 1: The storm arrives and the power goes out.

Action 2: Pipes burst, sending flooding and freezing water down the shafts and throughout the building.

Action 3: Windows begin blowing out. Any movement could risk electrocution, but staying risks freezing to death.

Mission 1: Donovan reasons with the inmates. Logically, they could overpower Brian, take their revenge for the shooting, and escape the prison tower. But go where? Into the storm? Is any shelter better than being outside and free?

Escalation

Action 1: We flash back to the last bus of prisoners fleeing in the storm. The engine stalls. The driver repeatedly tries to get the engine started again and panic takes hold. For a second, a moment of victory. Hope that they can keep moving.

Action 2/ Villain 1: A spark sets off an explosion in the engine and flames burst into the bus and are sucked backwards toward the oxygen of a faulty window. Sykes is blown out the doors.

Villain 2: Sykes makes a move to try to open the emergency door of the bus to save the chained men who might still be alive. But the door won’t open. Metal shards and glass from the bus are flying. It’s too late.

Villain 3: A scorched Sykes is left in agony. His face hardens. He knows who to blame. He rises and turns back toward the prison.

Second Turning Point at end of Act 2

Mission 1: Donovan makes decision to leave the unit and move to another floor, but the building is crumbling and water still cascades down an already faulty elevator shaft.

Mission 2: At the elevator shaft, they hear screams from below — SEG is being flooded, and a young inmate, who our hero tried to take under his wing earlier, is in SEG. A mission is hatched for our hero and two other men to go try to save the kid. But the stairs are blocked.

Action 1: Daring rescue attempt by our hero using the electrified elevator shaft, despite the cascades of water. They arrive. But they are too late.

Mission 3: Donovan and his “second story man from way back” experience crisis of will. Once again, Donovan has failed to save a younger brother-like figure in his life. But he gets back up.

Crisis

Mission 1: Donovan gives the inmates the bad news — they are blocked from going down. Their only choice is to go up to the guard level.

Action 1: A fried security door means that someone will have to hold the door open, in order for people to get out and then try to escape before it closes.

Mission 2: Our hero leads the remaining men to the guard level, only to find a hellscape. Electrical has sparked a fire, and the windows had already blown out in the storm. Fire and ice combine. There is no relief here.

Mission 3: The hero formulates a new plan using his survivalist skills, but first, they need to get across the fire to the control room. The men think he is crazy, but the plan is their only choice.

Action 2: Daring cross into the control room and the guard lockers.

Climax

Action 1: The inmates go out what is left of the window to scale down the building in the height of the storm.

Villain 1: Sykes made it across the bridge and onto the guard level.

Villain 2/ Mission 1: There’s a standoff between Donovan and Sykes. Donovan is stalling in hopes that the men get to safety.

Villain 3/ Action 2: Villain shoots at Donovan, but the young guard pushes him out of the way and takes the bullet.

Mission 2: Donovan tries to talk Sykes out of doing anymore damage. Tells him that he can help him. That they can all walk away from this.

Villain 4: Sykes is beyond listening and raises the gun again. Not knowing that the bullet that hit the young guard, also hit one of the last standing supports for the ceiling.

Villain 5/ Action 3: As Sykes fires, the ceiling comes down on him and kills him.

Resolution

Mission 1/ Action 1: Donovan takes Brian down the building — when it looks like there is no way that they’ll get to shelter fast enough to survive, they are met by the surviving men who have managed to start one of the prison vehicles.

Mission 2: They escape together into the prison garage, which is miraculously still standing.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by  Patricia Steffy.

[Evelyn Brooks]

Evelyn’s Story Map

What I learned doing this assignment is the amazing flexibility of creating an outline this way! I know I’ll be changing and upleveling my story elements as we move forward, but this process simplifies a daunting task. I found it was easiest if I omitted a lot of bridging scenes from previous assignments and my notes. This was an interesting challenge because I kept moving things around, swapping out the inciting incident I posted in lesson 6 for another event on my list, but I feel the process is making my story stronger.

ACT 1

OPENING

Action-1 Mikki competes in an MMA fight in Las Vegas, strawweight class, sold-out crowd.

Villain-1 In a room, while the fight airs on TV, gloved hands assemble an AR-15 sniper’s rifle from a ghost gun kit.

Action-2 Mikki wins, and the crowd goes crazy, loving her. We see her handsome husband Reinaldo cheering from the front row.

Mission-1 In the locker room, Mikki tells reporters she’ll be competing in another fight in two weeks for a charity event that deserves their support.

Villain-2 Shayla reminds everyone clamoring for Mikki that she’s not just a member of Mikki’s family (her first cousin), she’s Mikki’s social media and publicity director and all requests must come through her.

INCITING INCIDENT

Mission-2 Mikki is a guest on a local Las Vegas talk show, promoting her upcoming MMA charity event.

Action-3 Mikki is coming out of the talk show studio when she is ambushed by two masked thugs.

Villain-3 While Mikki is held down by the thugs, the sniper aims. But Mikki twists away and springs up so that the bullet hits one of the thugs in the shoulder. The other thug warns Mikki that if she goes to the police, they’ll hurt her little girl. Mikki runs to her car and drives off.

FIRST TURNING POINT AT END OF ACT 1

Villain-4 Having set up a fake auction online, Shayla arranges for Mikki to win it, supposedly buying the boxing gloves Muhammad Ali’s daughter Laila wore in her famous bout against Joe Frazier’s daughter in 2001.

Mission-3 Mikki wants to wear Laila’s gloves during the charity event bout, so she agrees to pick up the gloves at a house just outside of Vegas instead of risking the mail. Due to the recent attack on Mikki, Reinaldo is nervous about Mikki’s safety and cancels a business trip to drive her to the house.

Action-4 On a deserted street, an SUV roars up and smashes into the driver’s side of Mikki’s car (which has dark-tinted windows), fatally injuring Reinaldo, then drives off.

Villain-5 Shayla watches from a distance with binoculars, seeing Mikki stumble out of the passenger side and open the driver’s door to help Reinaldo. Shayla is shocked that Mikki wasn’t driving.

ACT 2

Mission-4 Mikki attends Reinaldo’s funeral and hosts a hotel luncheon for the guests.

Action-5 The two thugs kidnap Mikki’s daughter Ava (age 4).

Villain-6 A waiter delivers Shayla’s anonymous ransom note to Mikki during the luncheon, warning her that if she tells anyone or alerts authorities about the kidnapping, they will kill her daughter. Shayla leans over and asks Mikki if she’s okay.

Mission-5 Since Shayla is family, Mikki shows her the note in the restroom and swears her to secrecy.

Villain-7 Shayla promises Mikki she will help her raise the ransom money.

MID-POINT

Mission-6 Mikki can’t cancel the charity event because the organizers are counting on her to draw the crowd, so she shows up, ready to fight, despite her grief for Reinaldo and terror for Ava.

Action-6 Mikki loses the charity bout and thus the bonus purse given to the winner.

Mission-7 Mikki’s promoter calls and puts her on compassionate medical leave for six months, so she will not be competing in pro bouts until then–which means no income from her fights.

Villain-8 Shayla, whom we know by now is secretly an underground fighter, tells Mikki to consider doing an illegal fight to get the ransom money, but Mikki refuses, knowing that would kill her professional career.

Action-7 Shayla discovers her mom snooping and finding evidence that Shayla is Ava’s kidnapper. Shayla kills her parents and hides the bodies.

Villain-9 Shayla tells Ava that her mommy (Mikki) died and from now on she will live with her Auntie Shayla.

SECOND TURNING POINT AT END OF ACT 2

Villain-10 Shayla calls in the guise of the kidnapper and refuses to let Mikki talk to Ava.

Mission-8 Mikki begs for more time to get the ransom money, and the kidnapper agrees to another 48 hours. Mikki borrows money from wealthy friends, promising to sell her house to repay them, claiming Reinaldo’s family needs the money urgently.

Action-8 The two thugs mug Mikki on the way home from the bank and so she still doesn’t have the ransom amount.

Villain-11 Shayla calls as the kidnapper, demanding the money or she will kill Ava, and taunts Mikki that Ava already thinks Mikki is dead and hasn’t cried once.

ACT 3

CRISIS/DILEMMA

Mission-9 Mikki realizes the only way she can earn the rest of the ransom money is to finally accept an ongoing offer from an illegal fight club to fight for them–but doing so will mean she must give up her professional career and title as a sanctioned MMA fighter.

Villain-12 Shayla meets with her fight club promoter and promises she’ll bring the famous fighter Mikki to his club, demanding the highest prize and a cut.

CLIMAX

Action-9 Mikki wins the illegal fight against a woman outside her class, stronger and heavier

Mission-10 Mikki races to the dropoff point with the ransom money.

Action-10 At the dropoff, three thugs attack Mikki. Mikki fights back, defeating them, and unmasks Shayla as the leader.

Mission-11 Mikki grabs her money and goes to Shayla’s house, realizing that is where Ava must be.

RESOLUTION

Mission-12 Mikki finds Ava hidden in Shayla’s house and is on the way out the door with her daughter.

Villain-13 Shayla bursts in.

Action-11 Shayla has knives and rage on her side, but Mikki has a daughter to defend.

Mission-13 Mikki tries to avoid killing her cousin

Villain-14 Shayla pushes the fight to a single choice: who will live–Shayla or Ava?

Action-12 Mikki kills Shayla, hugs Ava, and then calls the police.

[Monica Arisman]

<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>SUBJECT: Monica’s Story Map

What I learned doing this assignment is that my villain track isn’t as robust as it should be.

CONCEPT: A police detective returns home to join a taskforce to break a human trafficking ring with a lead on the disappearance of her sister several years ago. Only to learn her lead is one of the masterminds behind the human trafficking ring that’s been infiltrated.

Opening: Victoria (heroine) returns home
with a lead in her sister’s disappearance several years ago. She joins the
undercover team.

· M1: Victoria goes undercover and infiltrates Beatrice and Jack’s inner circle.

· V1: The villain’s plan is in place but they’ve been complacent because Beatrice has friends in the upper tier of society and they’ve been getting away with it as they seem to be one step ahead of the police.

· A1: Manipulate Jack and his drug habit to get to Beatrice.

Inciting
Incident: After being accepted into
the ring, Victoria is arrested. The police storm the new night club, because
they thought they could get Jack (villain 1).

· M2: Victoria tries to free the women/victims Jack has brought into the new night club.

· V2: Jack is suspicious of Victoria when he sees her get a text and leave for the basement. But he’s high and not thinking right.

· A2: Victoria gets arrested but frees the women/victims.

First
Turning Point at end of Act 1: Find out Jack has Lizzie (the sister) and
has kept her captive all these years.

· M3: Victoria and Daniel (her superior) interview the women victims.

· V3: Victoria was right, Jack knows why more about her sister’s disappearance then he let on.

· A3: Jack forgets he invited Victoria to his hide-away but when he hears sirens he tries to escape and she chases after him.

Mid-Point: Victoria and Daniel (the partner)
break into Beatrice’s (villain 2 and mommy) and learn that about the
unnatural relationship between mother and son.

· M4: Break-into mommy’s house to find evidence of the ring.

· V4: Victoria and Daniel are almost caught when Beatrice and Jack return to the house.

· A4: Has to escape out a window and run to their vehicles with what they’ve gathered.

Second
Turning Point at end of Act 2: Victoria goes with Jack to procure more
victims.

· M5: Victoria maintains cover by going with Jack to procure more victims.

· V5: Kills the procurement men.

· A5: Victoria plans transmitters on the mini bus because she doesn’t trust Jack to take the women/victims where he says he’s going to take them.

Crisis/Dilemma: Victoria tells Beatrice Jack
killed the men who sold them the victims.

· M6: Discover where the women/victims are really being held. Plan a rescue.

· V6: Kidnaps Victoria and takes her to a place to rape and torture her because he’s pissed Victoria told his mother about the killings.

· A6: Victoria, even though she’s tied up and been hit a few times, takes down Jack and his friends. Only to get shot by Jack. Rescued by Daniel.

Climax: Jack kidnaps Victoria and
tortures her. With all her strength she kills Jack.

· M7: Victoria goes back undercover but is betrayed.

· V7: Jack is going to do away with Victoria once and for all.

· A7: Victoria kills Jack gruesomely.

Resolution:
Recovering from her wounds
Daniel and Victoria make plans for their future.

· M8: The ring is taken down. The undercover operation is over.

· V8: Jack and Beatrice are dead.

· A8: Victoria and Daniel ride off into the sunset (?)

[Mark Ezra]

Mark’s Story Map

What I learned from this assignment is that it keeps me brainstorming. I have discarded some earlier ideas, refined my plot and come up with one new idea that makes the whole much more convincing.

Opening

Villain 1 Disgruntled former member of the Bomb Squad robs a bank, takes the Squad Commander hostage, and in the escape blows himself and his hostage to smithereens.

Action 1 The Squad gives chase, trying to persuade the Hostage taker to surrender.

Mission 1 Hero joins the squad as a new recruit.

Inciting Incident

Villain 2 Villain lures members of the Bomb Squad to defuse an IED, but secretly plants a booby trap.

Action 2 The booby trap explodes, seriously injures Squad members.

Mission 2 Hero avoids injury, but has to step up and take responsibility for getting her colleagues out of harm’s way and saving lives.

Villain 3 Villain sends a truck laden with explosives into the Bomb Squad compound.

Action 3 The dangerous truck almost runs over the Squad, before exploding.

Mission 3 Hero takes control of the runaway truck and diverts it to a safe area, barely escaping with her own life. As it is their own truck, was this just a careless mistake?

First Turning Point at end of Act 1

Villain 4 After several more ‘accidents’, TV News report announces they have received threats that the Bomb Squad is being targeted. This news hits the squad hard.

Action 4 More dangerous explosions, some of which seem haphazard events but build tension.

Mission 4 Hero is promoted and installs more CCTV around the base.

Mid-Point (sends story in a new direction)

Villain 5 Member of Squad gets close to Hero and asks intrusive questions.

Action 5 More IEDs go off, now specifically aimed at Hero.

Mission 5 Hero becomes suspicious this member is an infiltrator when she realises the Villain is predicting the Squad’s moves.

Villain 6 Villain sends his men to get Hero.

Action 6 Hero attacked in her own home. Now it’s definitely personal.

Mission 6 Hero uses her arsenal of pest control devices to fend her attackers off and beat them.

Second Turning Point at end of Act 2

Mission 7 Hero unmasks the Squad Member she thinks is the infiltrator.

Villain 7 Villain ramps up the attack.

Action 7 A barrage of IEDs puts almost every Squad member out of action. Now only Hero and her close Pal remain to battle the Villain.

Crisis

Villain 8 Villain moves plan up – sends ransom demand.

Mission 8 Hero deduces who the Villain is, suspects ransom demand is a misdirection, and sets out to stop him.

Action 8 Chase becomes a race against time.

Climax

Villain 9 Villain goes to arm his smart bomb in the centre of the city – thousands will die.

Action 9 Hero’s race against time to fight off henchman and disarm radioactive part of bomb.

Mission 9 Hero realises she made a mistake – Villain is not whom she thought, but someone close to the person she suspected. She outfoxes the Villain and disarms the radioactive part of his bomb, at the same time trapping Villain with the massive detonator. Villain is exterminated, peace is restored.

Resolution

Mission 10 Hero is awarded a special medal of valor and earns the respect of her injured but healing Team-mates.

[John Woodward]

Subject line: John Woodward’s Story Map.

What I learned doing this assignment is that I described many of the same events with different language depending on the point of view – hero, villain, action.

Inciting Incident

A1. GANGBANGERS CHASE TREY & DOMINO. An innocent play in a ghetto baseball game pisses off a vicious crew of gangbangers. They ruthless gangsters chase Trey, a gutsy athletic youth, and his brother Domino through the dismal ghetto.

M3. First Action: Trey and his brother flee from local ghetto gangbangers.

M4. Obstacle: The ruthless gangbangers.

M5. Escalation: Desperate to hide from the murderous pursuers, Trey and his brother scramble into the creepy sub-basement of a dilapidated tenement.

V1. PLOTTING: From behind the rusted iron bars of a crude cage, Makepeace fantasizes about his plans to assassinate black leaders. Gnarly white fingers flip through a news magazine circa 1968 to a tattered photo of Walker Jones, a distinguished black civil rights leader. A razor blade carves the photo from the page. Fingers plunge a rusty pin through Jones’ smiling face and into the rat.

Several dead rats dangle from string nooses tied to the iron bars in a gallery of lynchings. Pinned to the rats: photos of black civil rights leaders, including popular presidential candidate Patricia Hamilton, America’s best hope for turning back a rising tide of racial conflict. Clearly, Hamilton is the ultimate target of his hate.

The brothers have inadvertantly gone from the frying pan to the fire as they enter the horribly twisted world of Captain Eldridge Makepeace, abominable old rogue, doomed to the realm of the undead after being killed and cursed by an African obeah doctor he sought to enslave. Compounding the mystery, the old-timer speaks in an antiquated British accent, wears his tarry pigtail long in the 18th century style. Imprisoned behind the rusted iron bars of the gruesome cage, MAKEPEACE peers at the boys. After a brief conversation, Trey learns Makepeace intends to assassinate Hamilton. And suddenly, the gangbangers discover the brothers.

TO ESCAPE IMPRISONMENT from the crude cage, MAKEPEACE EMPLOYS TRICKERY and EXTREME violence.

When the pale prisoner goads the gang members with insults, the gangsters resolve to teach him some manners. As they enter the cell to attack Makepeace, they unknowingly remove the sacred talismans that keep Makepeace weak and imprisoned. The vile gangsters soon learn that their trusted automatics are powerless against him! The fiend effectively turns the gangbangers’ weapons against them. As Makepeace slaughters all the gangbangers who forced Trey and his brother to hide in the tenement sub-basement. As Makepeace finishes off the gang, Trey and Domino flee! A second before the boys make a clean getaway, Makepeace shoots Trey’s brother in the back. Domino dies in Trey’s arms. Trey, alone, escapes from the sub-basement. Trey, alone, discovers the captain’s plan to assassinate America’s foremost black leaders culminating with Patricia Hamilton! Makepeace thrusts upon Trey the impossible mission of avenging his brother’s murder and saving Hamilton.

A2. Makepeace realizes he must destroy Trey before he rallies forces to thwart his assassination plan. When the news of the massacre gets back to the gang’s surviving members, they assume Trey killed their homies and begin to hunt him.

M1. Motivation: Avenge his brother’s murder and survive the villain’s attempts to kill him. Trey blames himself for his brother’s murder because Domino did not want to descend into the sub-basement to hide from the gangbangers. External motivation – Trey wants to prevent Makepeace from assassinating Hamilton and other civil rights leaders.

M2. Inciting Incident: Trey (hero) has the mission forced on him by the acts of Makepeace (the Villain).

M3. Overwhelming Odds: Makepeace is an immortal racist with supernatural strength who can’t be killed with weapons because he’s already dead. Trey discovers that although powerful weapons can’t kill Makepeace, they can slow him down.

V3. MAKEPEACE PLOTS HIS MISSION FROM THE CRUDE CAGE. ELDRIDGE MAKEPEACE, a tall, pale, abominable old rogue with a ruggedly handsome face, wears ragged earth-stained clothes, peers with a shrewd, prying intensity from the cell. His hair hangs in a braid below the shoulders of his soiled blouse. A livid scar from a saber slash traverses his neck from earlobe to earlobe. A tattoo of a sailor swinging on a rope by the neck adorns one sinewy arm. Another tattoo, near his shoulder, reads “A FAIR WIND.” He speaks in the antiquated vernacular of an 18th century British seaman. Strands of mold-covered rat paws hang like a beaded curtain from rusted iron bars, providing privacy for the crude cage. Gnarly fingers push the curtain aside. Light spills into the dismal cell.

V5. Trey learns of Makepeace’s plan to assassinate black leaders. Trey alone escapes from the sub-basement. Makepeace realizes he must destroy Trey before he rallies forces to thwart his plan.

V6. MAKEPEACE KILLS TREY’S BROTHER. Trey blames himself for his brother’s murder because the brother did not want to descend into the sub-basement in order to hide from the ganbangers. It motivates Trey to kill Makepeace and avenge his brother’s murder. It motivates Makepeace to kill Trey before he can attain revenge.

V7. MAKEPEACE KILLS GANGBANGERS. Makepeace escapes and kills all the ganbangers who chased Trey and caused him to hide in the tenement sub-basement. The living members of the gang assume that Trey killed their homies. They hunt Trey.

V8. MAKEPEACE KILLS the shaman KWA who has kept him imprisoned.

First Turning Point at end of Act 1

A5. MAKEPEACE CHASES TREY thru the ghetto. The chase forces Trey into a tough adjacent neighborhood. Joe, a world-weary construction foreman, discovers TREY breaking into his house and holds him at gunpoint for the police. Makepeace arrives first. Trey and Joe fight Makepeace then flee together.

A6. Neighbor videos TREY and JOE as they appear to murder an elderly white man who is actually the monster Makepeace. The video goes viral on the internet and makes the national news. The police, the gangbangers and Makepeace hunt Trey and Joe. Makepeace continues to pursue the unlikely allies. Joe removes himself from the fight to save the targeted civil rights leaders.

V9. MAKEPEACE CHASES TREY thru the ghetto. The chase forces Trey into a tough adjacent neighborhood. Joe, a world-weary construction foreman, discovers TREY breaking into his house and holds him at gunpoint for the police. Makepeace arrives first. Trey and Joe fight him then flee together.

V10. A neighbor uses his smartphone to video TREY and JOE appearing to murder the monster Makepeace. The video is played on the news and the internet. Trey and Joe are hunted by the police. Makepeace continues to pursue the unlikely allies. Now, Trey and Joe are wanted for murder by the police so they can’t go to the police for assistance.

M7. New Plan: Trey seeks help with weapons and tactics from a less-than-tolerant garden variety survivalist who sees Trey as big trouble. Trey must convince the survivalist that Makepeace is for real, and that Trey is not just another neighborhood grifter running a BS scam.

Mid-Point

A7. MAKEPEACE assassinates revered civil rights leader Walker Jones. The atmosphere in the city becomes increasingly chaotic and violent. Joe returns to help Trey after realizing he failed to believe Trey’s story and now Walker Jones is dead.

A8. Trey attacks MAKEPEACE with a bow and arrow. AS POLICE ARREST TREY, MAKEPEACE arrives and kills them. The undead monster realizes that Trey is resourcefully seeking weapons that can slow him down. And therefore, Makepeace doubles his effort to kill Trey.

V11. MAKEPEACE assassinates revered civil rights leader Walker Jones. Trey and Joe realize the urgency of their mission. The atmosphere in the city becomes increasingly chaotic and violent. Joe returns to help Try after realizing he failed to believe Try’s story and now Walker Jones is dead. The unlikely allies are now stuck with each other and will grow to rely on each other.

V12. MAKEPEACE endures a bow and arrow attack by Trey. The undead monster realizes that Trey is resourcefully seeking weapons that can slow him down. And therefore, Makepeace doubles his effort to kill Trey.

V13. AS POLICE ARREST TREY, MAKEPEACE arrives and kills them. At the last second, Joe arrives to save Trey. Makepeace endures Joe’s attack with more powerful firearms. Another intense gun battle and chase ensues.

Second Turning Point at end of Act 2

A9. MAKEPEACE initiates his hunt for Presidential candidate Patricia Hamilton. Knowing Trey and Joe are in pursuit, Makepeace accelerates his mission to assassinate Hamilton. Makepeace endures Joe’s attack with more powerful firearms. Another intense gun battle and chase ensues. Makepeace follows Hamilton as her campaign moves from New York to Delaware. Based on news reports for Hamilton’s next campaign stop, Trey and Joe try to get Makepeace before he gets Hamilton.

A10. MAKEPEACE steals a car to pursue Trey and Joe. Gun battle ensues during an intense car chase on the open highway. Trey fires a bazooka that destroys the undead slave trader’s Cadillac. But once again the immortal villain emerges from the fiery crash damaged but not destroyed.

V14. MAKEPEACE initiates his hunt for Presidential candidate Patricia Hamilton. Knowing Trey and Joe are in pursuit, Makepeace accelerates his mission to assassinate Hamilton. Makepeace follows Hamilton as her campaign moves from New York to Delaware. Based on news reports for Hamilton’s next campaign stop, Trey and Joe try to get Makepeace before he gets Hamilton.

V15. MAKEPEACE steals a car to pursue Trey and Joe. Gun battle ensues during an intense car chase on the open highway. Trey fires a bazooka that d estroys the undead slave trader’s Cadillac. But once again he emerges from the fiery crash damaged but not destroyed.

V16. MAKEPEACE battles the unlikely duo on a claustrophobic ferry ride across Delaware bay.

V17. MAKEPEACE appeals to Joe, white man to white man, in order to convince him to betray Trey.

Crisis

A11. MAKEPEACE battles the unlikely duo on a claustrophobic ferry ride across Delaware bay.

A12. MAKEPEACE tracks Hamilton to a rural hunting-lodge style hotel that she uses to rest up for a campaign appearance. Makepeace battles then kills a dozen secret service agents on his way to Hamilton’s room. Hamilton resourcefully defends herself long enough for Trey and Joe to join the battle with the immortal villain. Trey and Joe help to rescue her for the time being.

V18. MAKEPEACE tracks Hamilton to a rural hunting-lodge style hotel she uses for the campaign stop. Makepeace battles then kills a dozen secret service agents on his way to Hamilton’s room. Makepeace Hamilton resourcefully defends herself long enough for Trey and Joe to join the battle with the immortal villain.

Climax

M9. Success: Trey retrieves the sacred talismans and uses them to weaken and re-imprison Makepeace.

M8. Full out Attack: Trey and the survivalist battle Makepeace with bullets as they seek to save Hamilton. Makepeace kills the survivalist who put his life on the line to help Trey save Hamilton.

A13. The climactic BATTLE continues from the hotel to an industrial area of the waterfront. Joe appears to be trapped in a boat as it sinks offshore. Makepeace pursues Trey and Hamilton. Eventually Joe re-enters the battle. A commercial speargun (used to hunt whales) slams threw Makepeace and pins him to a huge wooden dock pilon. Not dead, but not free, Makepeace curses the pair as they transport him to his final resting place. Or is it?

V19. A climactic BATTLE continues from the hotel to an industrial area of the waterfront. Joe appears to be trapped in a boat as it sinks offshore. Makepeace pursues Trey and Hamilton. Eventually Joe re-enters the battle. A commercial speargun (used to hunt whales) slams through Makepeace and pins him to a huge wooden dock pilon. Not dead, but not free, Makepeace curses the pair as they transport him to his final resting place. Or is it?

Resolution

Hamilton wins Delaware primary. Still harpooned to the dock post, Makepeace curses Trey and Joe as they drop him into an enormous pilon for a gigantic skyscraper near the Statue of liberty. Joe positions his massive cement truck, dumps concrete atop the treacherous fiend. The fiend is not dead, but he may as well be.

[Pat GALBRAITH Galbraith]

ASSIGNMENT:7

Pat Galbraith’s Story Map

What I learned from this assignment is the magic of knowing I have them in the right places.<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>

1. Start with the structure you built in Lesson 6.

Act I

1.Opening

1863, During the civil war, back woods of Arkansas. Colonial home where she lives with her family. Jesse James and the younger brother often sit at the dinner table. Myra is one of many children.

2.Inciting Incident

V I Renegade northern troops invade the state of Arkansas because they favor the south. Burning homes and killing civilians.

3.First Turning Point attend of Act 1

V I Myra learns of neighbor’s babies being killed, fathers hung, and mother raped by the malicious evil soldiers.

V I Families burned out and killed by Renegade troops.

A 1 Myra joins a neighborhood 0utlaw gang.

ACT II

V I The younger farm is targeted by the Renegades.

M 4 She joins with Bud, her brother to help fight and kill them, and save the younger brother’s home.

A 2 Myra and Bud sit aloft a hill and pick the Renegades one by one.

Myra’s outlaw gang is successful and run the Renegade soldiers off.

V I Bud, her brother has been killed by Henry Brice a northern Captain.

M 2 She begins to ride with an outlaw gang to stop the renegades.

M 3 The outlaw gang search the area for where the Renegades might be camping.

V I Renegades continue their raids.

4. Mid-Point

5. Second Turning Point at end of Act 2

Myra’s gang learns where the renegades are camping on a hill outside town.

M 5 The gang rides in the direction of the camp.

V I Someone gets word to the Renegade troops of her impending attack.

ACT III

6.Crisis

M 7 Her gang is met by a small scouting troop.

Her gang chase them back to the campsite.

They ride there with plans to kill them all.

V 1 Crisis They are outnumbered. It’s a dark day.

8. Climax

M 8 A few days later they decide to attack the troops after dark.

They ride to the camp. Get control of the men and kill them one by one.

V I But Henry Brice, the man who killed her brother, escapes.

M 9 She and her gang ride into town to kill the man who killed her brother. He’s not there when they arrive. They hold his family hostage and plan to kill them too. When he returns to the house, she lets him in at gunpoint.

V I He jumps her, and they wrestle taking the gun from her.

M 10 Thinks of Bud as she aims her knife.

A 1 She throws her knife. Stabs him in the heart.

8. Resolution

She lets Henry Brice’s wife and family go.

Later they decide to stay together, incase other troops come back.

[Daniel Burt]

Dan’s Story Map

I learned during this assignment that my storyboard is made from the inside out, not come pitch time.

(D.I.G. 4 Season 1 Pilot)

ACT I

In a not-too-distant future, humans attempting to geo-engineer the weather thru H.A.R.P. and other technologies manage to irrevocably damage the NOA (North Atlantic Overcurrent), precipitating an ice age that (models predict) will bring global subarctic temperatures for 900+ years. We. Messed. Up. It was bound to happen. Governments see the inevitable death of the planet approaching, and mankind rallies to defeat it.

Opening

M1 Jordan Hendrix in action as head of Sato Petrochemical’s security team. Poignant and failed interactions with his ex and daughter.

A1 Markus Mohebby sparks world attention via a multi-billion dollar awareness campaign. He accurately predicts three major disasters in succession.

V1 Claudette Martz, an amoral power broker and the 9th wealthiest person in the world as the pilot begins, in a close relationship with the world’s first and oldest AI.

Inciting
Incident

M2 Mr. Sato, Jordan Hendrix’s boss and father-in-law, is an early adopter of Markus Mohebby’s theory. Jordan is called to leave his daughter and ex-wife in Okinawa, and his position as head of security, to manage Mr. Sato’s concerns in America. There, he is later drafted to head the D.I.G. 4 tactical reconnaissance team.

A2 The world plots and plans its survival, with mixed means and motives.

V2 Claudette plots to fully exploit the terrifying events and begins to eliminate like-caliber competitors.

First
Turning Point at end of Act 1

The world is waking up to a terrifying yet quickening reality. It’s an unexpected story of survival, hope, and the resilience of the human spirit. The poignant circumstances and careening storyline – I truly believe – will dumbfound audiences from its smallest survivor to its audacious cinematography. We track multiple amazing groups, each trying to outdistance the cataclysm, each awkwardly confronting a new, outrageous future.

M3 Jordan Hendrix training in Colorado to become D.I.G. 4’s Tactical Security Chief, familiarizing himself with the specialized equipment and standard weaponry of his position, and getting to know his team.

A3 The world understands its plight and is on board. Any activity not at least tangential to addressing the coming ice age is shunned. Real problems begin to rid the world of imaginary ones.

V3 Claudette swings into action, establishing deep, redundant networks and technological advantages.

ACT II

Mid-Point

Dark, gritty, and dramatic at this point in the pilot, we join people amid survival choices where there is “little hope for the eyes”. Although this is to be a series, we will be filming widescreen theatrical in 6K full of deep shadows and emotional haze, as our survivors pass the point of no return in their decisions and deeper into their unknown future. A dark musical score will drive the story forward leaving lasting emotional attachments with the audience. Midway, joy is fleeting, yet real.

M4 Jordan creates a contingency plan with Mr. Sato to place his family in Cryogenic Sleep should the need arise. A three-way rivalry for his team’s leadership heats up, leading to an all-out brawl during training in a subterranean cavern.

A4 The drama of global preparations incites wars, alliances, power struggles, and tightly woven schemes. Secret operations and networks emerge.

V4 Claudette stands up APEX Survival Incorporated, letting nothing and no one dilute her vision.

Second
Turning Point at end of Act 2

Amid a series of immoral betrayals – individuals and groups fear-driven to tear their own survival from others – the ice age begins in earnest 18 weeks early. Nodes near the poles are defeated overnight, with a domino effect on preparations worldwide.

M5 Mr. Sato is forced to enact the backup plan; his father-in-law dies as he delivers the news. Jordan must steel himself, take the reigns of D4, and lead an ad hoc passenger list and his team forward. Escape the looming global ice age and lead the 4,000+ souls aboard D.I.G. 4 to a haven close to the Earth’s core while coordinating with other nodes’ survival efforts.

A5 Death arrives early, and preparations are either inadequate or being adjusted en media res.

V5 Claudette begins nested planning for every foreseeable branch and sequel. She executes her early arrival contingency plan, which involves destroying the entire 5^th Earth Carrier Group and replacing the leadership on the International Moon base.

ACT III

Crisis
Climax

The surviving head into the ice age with who and what they have. As a bitter send-off, Earth has a complete magnetic shift, destroying or maiming structures and vessels everywhere.

M6 Hendrix and his team must reattach the water-sluice system to the main shaft wall in the middle of a blizzard, as the magnetic fluctuations tear it from its moorings.

A6 The magnetic storms 10x worsen the struggles to get underway across the planet.

V6 Claudette welcomes everyone within the A.S.I. footprint by inaugurating her personal army.

Resolution

Humanity takes stock of itself, its resources, personnel, and leadership. With few survival nodes not on the precipice, the regular season begins. Now we must conquer our most nascent and abiding fears; freezing, starving, the dark world beneath us, the oceans crushing depths, the void of space, and a truly raving and desperate mankind.

M7 Hendrix records a message for his daughter and ex-wife, sending them to the cryo-bed server hoping they’ll get them. Flashing back to an image of him ushering a family to safety in Rwanda, he leads the last of the passengers into D4 and seals the door. He joins the crew on the bridge and stands his post.

A7 A bereft and shattered species begins day one of operations in their respective survival modalities.

V7 Claudette entertains the leadership team, power brokers, and wealthy heads of state at an opulent feast in their honor.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by  Daniel Burt.

[Bent Hanlen]

BENT’S STORY MAP

what I learned doing this assignment is this is an incredibly easier way of perfecting an outline. I am convinced this is the future of how I write all my outlines from now on. I see my movie.

Opening

M1 – A scout elf observes an earth formation where Krampus is rumored to exit.

A1- The elf is caught by demons and tortured.

V1 – Krampus arrives and throws him into his sleigh. The demons release the sleigh and the reindeer with a warning of what is to come.

Inciting Incident

A1 – The elf arrives to the North Pole and crashes onto the runway. Everyone is alarmed. The elf is dead along with some reindeer who were dragged though the sky.

V1 – The General steps out to observe all of this. Then he returns inside angry.

First Turning Point at end of Act 1-

V1 – The General is turned down for more oil pumping at the North Pole so they can bring in more money for a military defense. Santa doesn’t like the idea of weapons.

M1- The sleighs are prepared and loaded with presents and all are going to different countries.

A1 – The sleighs are sent out and a young female elf purposely stows away. Her brother is looking for her.

Mid-Point

V1 -Santa and his elves are delivering presents and this begins the first attack by Krampus and demons. A damaging chase through a neighborhood ensues. Santa and elves get away.

A1 – But the young female is kidnapped by Krampus.

M1 – They keep delivering presents because it must be done.

Second Turning Point at end of Act 2

A1 – The brother panics after asking pilot elves where his sister is. They say she’s not with them anymore. brother panics and runs around to other sleighs and finally reaches Santa to express concerns.

V1 – at the North Pole, the General decides to board his sleigh. He claims he is off to back up Santa.

M1 – Santa receives word that the General is on his way to assist for the rest of the presents delivery.

V2 – Krampus has a bag of children and the elf girl. He scares them all.

A2 – the brother elf demands they go back to find Krampus.

Crisis

M1 – Two scout sleighs search for Krampus. They find him and the demons with a sack of children.

V1 – The General arrives and antagonizes Krampus. Then lures him. He goes in the direction of Santa and the elves delivering.

A1 – The scout elves follow as fast as possible. As they get closer to where Santa is with the elves they try to get ahead of the evil.

M2 – Santa and the elves are wrapping up presents delivery in the area. They see the General coming. Then Krampus behind him.

V2 = Krampus sees Santa. He gathers his demons. It is a gang of them.

Climax

A1 – Santa boards his sleigh and informs everyone to get to the North Pole now.

M1 The brother elf sees the sack of kids dropped. He waves for the scout sleigh to stop. The brother elf runs over to the sack and rescues his sister elf. and the kids.

A2 Krampus and the demons attack the sleighs as they are departing. Krampus commands a sleigh and goes after Santa. The General watches and doesn’t do anything.

V1 = The General flies along and watches. Doesn’t take action.

M2 – The elves who are flying are helpless as they are attacked by the demons on the sleighs.

A3 – There is a battle and the brother elf who has demons attacking his sleigh goes towards the General for help.

V2 – The General is caught by surprise and demons board his sleigh. General is attacked.

A4 – The elves on the General’s sleigh jump aboard the sleigh the brother elf is flying.

V3 – the General goes down and crashes into the ocean.

A5 Santa and Krampus battle and Santa is on the losing end. The sister elf interferes and saves Santa. Krampus is tied up in dangling reindeer cables. His body is cut in half. The top part remains stuck to the sleigh.

Resolution

M1 – A battered Santa steps out from his home and looks out on the Horizon. There is a tomb and it is very well cemented. It reads do not touch. He is at peace.

A1 – He looks over and on the horizon are Russian and Canadian oil drilling equipment vehicles arriving to the North Pole.

• This reply was modified 2 years, 1 month ago by  Bent Hanlen.
• This reply was modified 2 years, 1 month ago by  Bent Hanlen.

[Andre]

Andre’s story map…

What I learned doing this assignment is…, the Purpose of this lesson is an organizational
experience. An organizational experience that allows Me to SEE My Story as a whole; not perfection, just
rough draft of my outline.

Act1

Mission Tracks (M1, M2, M3, M4, M5)

M1- Launch.

M2- Character Introductions

M3- Mission research, Technology, Equipment, Tools.

M4- Consciousness search.

M5- Time

Villain Tracks (V1, V2, V3, V4, V5,
V6, V7)

V1- Fuel diminishments. Perishables.

V2- Oxygen diminishments. Perishables.

V3- Space diminishments. Perishables.

V4- Time is always running out!

V5- Food diminishments. Perishables.

V6- Unproven technology, tool, equipment.

V7- The unknown, Ignorance.

Action Tracks (A1, A2, A3)

A1- Nozzles, gages, pumps. Unproven Technology, Tool, Equipment.

A2- Character Action sequences timed with nozzles, gages, and pumps.

A3- Research.

A4- Time is always running out!

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Act2

Mission Tracks (M1, M2, M3, M4)

M1- Nozzles, gages, pumps depletion as We head to the Moon.

M2- Character Action sequences timed with nozzles, gages, and pumps.

M3- Mission Scientific Research.

M4- Time begins to run out!

Villain Tracks (V1, V2, V3, V4, V5,
V6, V7)

V1- Fuel diminishments. Perishables.

V2- Oxygen diminishments. Perishables.

V3- Space diminishments. Perishables.

V4- Time is always running out!

V5- Food diminishments. Perishables.

V6- Unproven Technology, Tool, Equipment.

V7- The unknown, Ignorance.

Action Tracks (A1, A2, V3)

A1- Time is always running out!

A2- Orbit to Moon.

A3- Descend to land.

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Act3

Mission Tracks (M1, M2, M3, M4)

M1- Landing on the Moon!

M2- Time is running out!

M3- Research Science experiments.

M4- Consciousness.

Villain Tracks (V1, V2, V3, V4)

V1- Fuel diminishments. Perishables.

V2- Oxygen diminishments. Perishables.

V3- Space diminishments. Perishables.

V4- Time is always running out!

V5- Food diminishments. Perishables.

V6- Unproven Technology, Tool, Equipment.

V7- The unknown, Ignorance.

Action Tracks (A1, A2, A3)

A1- Time is always running out!

A2- Science experiments.

A3- Wrapping science experiments and prepare to depart Moon.

Act4

Mission Tracks (M1, M2, M3, M4)

M1- Depart the Moon!

M2- Time is running out!

M3-

Villain Tracks (V1, V2, V3, V4)

V1- Fuel diminishments. Perishables.

V2- Oxygen diminishments. Perishables.

V3- Space diminishments. Perishables.

V4- Time is always running out!

V5- Food diminishments. Perishables.

V6- Unproven Technology, Tool, Equipment.

V7- The unknown, Ignorance.

Action Tracks (A1, A2, A3)

A1- Time is always running out!

A2- depart the Moon and landing safely on earth.

A3- Consciousness.

A4- Science experiments.

End story mapping.

-Andre