Lesson 7

[Edward Gillow]

Lesson 7 ASSIGNMENT
Ed. Gillow – Solves Major Problems!
What I learned from doing this assignment is that when you work on a screenplay for seven years that you are able to make stronger: the transformational journey, central conflict, stronger opening, and stronger ending. But going through this exercise was beneficial as a check.
• A Need Stronger Transformational Journey – check / nc
• B Need Stronger Conflict – check / nc
• C Need Stronger Opening – check / nc
• D Need Stronger Ending – check / nc

• This reply was modified 11 months, 4 weeks ago by  Edward Gillow.

[j T]

Jessica Tremblay Solves Major Problems!
“What I learned from doing this assignment is…there is always room for improvement. (Also, since we’re adding to the outline, It’s a struggle to keep the outline under 10 pages.)
A. Need Stronger Transformational Journey: I’ve emphasized that she likes things to be clean and organized, so being in a dirty and disorganized environment in the basement will cause her added stress. Also, I have to show an evolution on how she cares for the doll, from ignoring it, to tucking it in, to strapping it to herself, to saving it, naming it.
B. Need Stronger Conflict. She wants to get out. Beast blocks access to her territory. (Also they are fighting for the bunny, they are fighting for the doll. They are fighting like siblings who don’t want to share!)
C. Need Stronger Opening: She’s a shoplifter who discovers her one night stand is a cop. And her apartment is full of evidence.
D. Need Stronger Ending: maybe show an in-person meeting with Mike, if possible, to show they can make it work as a family.

• This reply was modified 11 months, 3 weeks ago by  j T.

[Tasha Espinoza]

Tasha Solves Major Problems!
What I learned from doing this assignment is how these 4 simple areas really allow you to walk around easily in the story and explore ways to make greater changes at the outline level.
List of the changes:
A. Need Stronger Transformational Journey
-Need to make her more uncertain of herself in the beginning, but still keep her need to pursue the change she wants to see in her life.
-Establish in the beginning of her arc that Deacon Anders has guided her spiritually and she has never had the chance to develop the innate spiritual power she demonstrates during her exorcism.
-Deacon Anders' turn and betrayal affect her deeply and should be established as the impetus for really pushing herself out of her comfort zone and to seek a solution to her situation that is initially very foreign to her.
B. Need Stronger Conflict
-Give Deacon Anders a personal reason to fear her like a permanent injury he sustained during Bethany’s exorcism.
-Increase Deacon Anders desire to hold on to the control he has over he life.
-Make the conflict evolve from just threatening to Bethany to something that threatens the world. The conflict is fairly simple but as Bethany endeavors to solve it, it evolves into something that goes way beyond trying to figure out why she’s being ghosted. It evolves to the point where Bethany’s soul hangs in the balance.
C. Need Stronger Opening
-Needs to be scarier.
-Bethany needs to be introduced in an ordinary that turns into the unordinary as you realize she battles a demon for her soul.
-Increase the danger a possessed Bethany presents.
D. Need Stronger Ending
-Really need to drive home her pulling away from the father figure and embracing belief in herself and her newfound abilities.