Lesson 8

[Mark Wakely]

Mark Wakely’s Writes Great Hope/Fear!

What I learned doing this assignment is how to put the audience on a satisfying roller coaster of emotions.

Act 1:

Hope: The restaurant inventory will go smoothly

Threat: There’s a tornado warning

Fear: The restaurant will be hit by the tornado

Hope: The storm will pass

Hope: If not, the basement will protect them. There’s a basement washroom as well.

Danger: The tornado hits the restaurant

Act 1 turning point: Although they’re uninjured, there’s no way out of the basement

Act 2:

Danger: They can’t lift the debris to free themselves.

Danger: Their cellphones don’t work

Fear: They’re going to die from starvation, heat and/or lack of fresh air

Hope: Knocking on the debris covering the staircase might attract rescuers

Fear: The rescuers might think the building was unoccupied since it was closed and not search for them.

Danger: The restaurant owner left his medicine upstairs

Hope: They’ll be rescued before the owner dies from not having his medicine

Act 2 turning point: There’s no immediate response to their knocking so it’s uncertain if help will arrive in time to save the owner, who is unable to help with their plan

Act 3:

Danger: The employees are getting tired and frustrated, threatening their unity

Fear: They will all stop trying to be rescued

Danger: The chef refuses to help, burdening the other two employees with the task of knocking for help.

Hope: Two of the employees keep knocking for help, despite their frustration

Act 3 turning point: The chef discovers that the waitress he’s attracted to and the waiter trapped with them were once in a relationship, enraging him. He also discovers the owner’s construction plans for the building, which show that the washroom was meant to be a staircase for emergency egress.

Act 4:

Fear: There’s little hope they’ll be rescued

Danger: They start to turn on each other instead of working together to save themselves

Danger: A floor joist falls, striking the waiter and waitress

Hope: Although injured, they survive

Danger: The chef convinces the waiter and waitress that the owner is solely responsible for their injuries and impending deaths

Danger: The three of them, paranoid from fatigue and enraged, stab the owner to death

Act 4 turning point: Rescuers arrive after all. They are the only survivors found because the building construction was so solid. A first responder finds the owner’s body. The three employees wordlessly walk away knowing they’ll soon be arrested for murder.

[Tom Freyer]

Tom Writes Great Hope/Fear!

What I learned: This exercise helped me make sure all four acts put the reader on a roller coaster of emotions.

Act 1:
• DANGEROUS: At a small airport, Limo carrying A RAPPER, his MANAGER and PUBLICIST are mobbed on their way to their private plane following a concert. OUT OF CONTROL: DRIVER tries to drive through rowdy fans who pound on windows and rock limo. HOPE: SECURITY GUYS try to hold them back as they race to the plane. INTRIGUE: Publicist turns on switch hidden in her hat, puts hat on. Her phone shows scene in front of her. FEAR: PILOT warns of approaching snowstorm, OPPOSING NEEDS: says they should wait. It out, Manager agrees with Pilot. Publicist tells Rapper he’s too headstrong. FORCED TO DEAL WITH EACH OTHER: All three argue. But Rapper demands they take off anyway. Distracted FANBOY fills fuel tank. IMPENDING DOOM: Insert of Fuel Type warning sticker not to mistake regular and jet fuel. FEAR: As the plane climbs the rocky peaks in the turbulent storm, engine starts to sputter. HOPE: Sputtering stops. Engine seems to be okay. FEAR: Sputtering gets worse! HOW MANY THINGS CAN GO WRONG?: Engine dies! THREAT: Pilot: assume the crash postion! DESTRUCTION: • Inciting Incident: The plane crashes high in the mountains. FEAR: Radio broken. HOPE: Pilot tells Rapper transponder will have searchers locate them. FEAR: Plane slips a bit! They’re trapped in the plane! DEATH: •
FEAR: Wreckage dangles precipice with Dead Pilot, Manager and Publicist inside. HELPLESS: All passengers try cell phones. ISOLATION: No coverage..

TURNING POINT: Pilot dies

Act 2:
TRIGGERING EACH OTHER: Rapper and Manager blame each other. HOPE: Rapper manages to kick out windscreen and escape plane. !FEAR: Wreckage slips
HOPE: Rapper makes a HELP sign out of rocks, continues to try phone PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUES (FEAR): Publicist becoming hysterical. HOPE: Rapper tries to climb back into into wreckage. FEAR: Plane slips! Too risky! HOPE: Manager calms her down with funny memory. INTRIGUE: What’s really going on between them? HOPE: • Manager tries to climb out: TRAPPED: Bulkhead in the way! FEAR: Wreckage slips again! HOPE: Publicist gets intermittent cell phone signal. Rescuers looking for them! FORCED TO DEAL WITH EACH OTHER Manager manages to move bulkhead and free himself and Pubicist. Manager reminds Rapper this was all his doing
REVEAL: Rapper reminds Manager he’d be in prison but for his father the attorney’s help. REVEAL: Manager reveals it’s actually his life and lyrics that made this poser — the Rapper — a huge success.

TURNING PONT: DANGER: Rapper tries to leave, slips and nearly falls to his death

Act 3:
HOPE: Manager ties electrical to sapling and pulls Rapper toward safety FEAR: Sapling bends, starts to crack. HOPE: Sapling holds enough for Manager to save Rapper
FEAR: Publicist announces she’s losing phone charge
•• Turning Point: Starts to snow and blow hard.
FEAR: Rapper decides he has to kill Manager.
HOPE: Publicist warns him she has been filming everything via hidden camera

TURNING PONT: DANGER: Fight causes an avalanche, burying Manager and Rapper

Act 4:
HOPE: Publicist climbs out of plane
FEAR: Frantically digs for Manager and Rapper
HOPE: Pulls Manager out of snow
FEAR: Manager hypothermia
HOPE: Pulls Rapper out of snow
FEAR: Rapper hypothermia, not breathing
HOPE: Manager resuscitates him
HOPE: Publicist gets call from Rescuers on cell phone
FEAR: Call gets cut off
HOPE: Chopper appears out of storm
FEAR: Rescue chopper can’t land
HOPE: Rescue team fast ropes to ground with basket stretcher
FEAR: Rapper almost falls from basket but recovers

END: All three are placed in chopper and treated

• This reply was modified 3 months, 1 week ago by  Tom Freyer.

[Paul McGregor]

Paul writes great hope/fear!

4. What I learned doing this assignment was that Hal’s words about making sure our scenes are not just an EVENT but rather an EMOTIONAL EXPERIENCE provide an excellent paradigm to be observed as I write. They express so well what we should be trying to achieve. Those words provide a lens through which to look at each of my acts while still at the planning stage.

I do not yet have the 5 or more moments for each act, but am submitting this assignment now and will continue to develop them.

2. 5 or more Hope/Fear moments in each Act.

Act 1:
1. FEAR: Jill depressed. We see her drugs. She’s on the verge of committing suicide.
HOPE: She is stopped by a call on her cell phone. For an instant it distracts her, but that is enough to save her life. The woman at the other end invites her to visit a House for Sale. Arranges time.
2. HOPE: Arrives at house, on time.
FEAR: Nobody there. No car. No-one answers. Been "stood up" again?
3. HOPE: We see Real-Estate Agent is inside house looking out at Jill as she waits outside.
FEAR: Meeting Real-Estate Agent, Jill finds something unsettling in her behavior.
4. HOPE: Jill initially finds the house attractive.
FEAR: On entering the bedroom, she feels an inexplicable chill. Wants to get out!
5. Turning point: HOPE: Jack, another potential buyer, turns up.
FEAR: Turns out, Jack is Jill’s drug-dealer.

ACT 2
1. HOPE: Jack talks positively about the house and location. Lived nearby as a boy.
FEAR: Tells how neighbor’s wife died in childbirth in the house.
2. FEAR: As they visit the house, Jill is seized by a panic attack in the bedroom.
HOPE: Jack provides comfort and her panic subsides.
3. FEAR: Agent says she also does not like the bedroom. (She continues to conceal that it was where she died giving birth to Jill).
HOPE: Agent speaks caringly to Jill, with advice on how to dominate her anxiety.
4. FEAR: Jill reacts badly. Doesn’t want other people telling her what to do. Decides to leave.
FEAR: Jill;s car won’t start. She can’t escape.
HOPE: Jack tells her he’ll take her out in his car.
5. FEAR: Jack’s car won’t start either. They are both stuck there.

Act 3
[To be completed.]

Act 4
1. FEAR: The Agent disappears. It was all a fraud.
HOPE: A real Real-Estate Agent drives up. He can finalize the sale.

END

• This reply was modified 3 months ago by  Paul McGregor.