Lesson 8

[Jan Lloyd]

Subject line: (Jan’s) Beat Sheet Draft 2
What I learned in this assignment: I am becoming more organized in the process and still writing fast. I am working from my book, but I can see how much more I could have put into that.
PASS 1: INTERWEAVE THEME THROUGHOUT YOUR BEAT SHEET
THEME: The meaning and purpose of everything in the story; a unifying or dominant idea.
If you haven’t already decided upon your theme, how do you create it? Ask yourself questions like:
• What is this story really about? It’s really about all the strange creatures coming into their lives and the mysery that surrounds the animals
• What is the real issue I want to explore? They want to explore what these animals are all about and what the strange encoded email messages mean.
• What is the meaning of all this? It is STRANGE WORLD. Even the twins can see there are abnormalities at work in their lives. So many coincidences. Twins abandoned at a hospital. Their ability to find unusual animals with strange resources. The encoded messages to find JL.
PASS 2: BUILD THE ANTAGONIST INTO THE BEAT SHEET
1. The Antagonist in this first part is Bradly and his Bullies. He wants to thwart Clay and Dolphyn. Maybe it is jealousy because Clay has helped him with his math in the past or because the twins are smarter and have made money making online games.
2. Bradley wants some of the money the twins have made, but it all goes to the school lunch program.
3. Bradley confronts Clay in the alley and smashes Clay against a brick wall. Stinky, the mouse runs from Clays pants and runs up Bradleys pants resulting in Bradley trying to rip his pants off. His zipper catches him and he cries in pain. He bends forward and Clay pushes him into the mud before running.
4. Bradley’s gang pursues Clay but he makes it safely home.
5. Clay sees Bradley at school, but Bradley does not seem intent on revenge, instead he extends his hand in peace. But is it really peace?
6. Turns out Bradley finds a way to make Clay and Dolphyn get into trouble that gets them sent into juvenile courts.

[Kenneth Johnson]

Kenneth Johnson – Beat Sheet Draft 2

What I learned is that I actually did most of this assignment in the previous assignment. Still moving forward!

Act 1:

MONTAGE

INT. DESIGN OFFICE – DAY

We meet MICHAEL as a young man in his 20s fresh out of college. He works at an angled drafting table with other designers looking on as his employer and mentor fires him.

INT. TELEVISION STUDIO – DAY

Michael has forgiven himself for being fired from his last job. He comfortably walks around the set of a daytime talk show with a clipboard in his hand and a stopwatch around his neck giving direction.

EXT. SKY – DAY

An airliner brings Michael back to Los Angeles in a brilliant blue sky over pristine white clouds.

INT. LEE’S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – DAY

It is clearly a heated phone conversation that LEE is having with his ex-wife, Michael’s mother who is insisting that Lee let him stay there. We see Michael standing by the front door with his luggage in hand. Lee scowls.

EXT. LEE’S HOUSE – FRONT DRIVEWAY – DAY

Michael has the hood up on his 1972 Volvo 142E. He is intently working on his engine with his small toolkit and socket set. Lee watches from the window and is pleased.

INT. LEE’S HOUSE – CRAWLSPACE – DAY

Under the house, Lee and Michael are in coveralls and work with a pipe cutter and propane torch as Lee shows him how to do a copper re-pipe.

END MONTAGE

INT. LEE’S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

TE 1: Michael and Lee drink too much beer watching Monday Night Football. An Army recruitment commercial incites Lee to tell about his Company of 200 men getting wiped-out during the Korean War. Through tears he told how only he and two other guys survived. Even drunk, Michael is shocked.

20 YEARS LATER

INT. MICHAEL’S HOUSE – KITCHEN – MORNING

Michael is in running clothes preparing a quick bite to eat. His perky but unhappy wife CHERYL gives him a hard time about his writing not covering expenses and maybe he should get a regular job.

EXT. SANTA MONICA BEACH – BIKE PATH – MORNING

Michael and his two running buddies TIM and KEVIN jog along the path and discuss Michael’s troubles. Kevin tries to console Michael over his recent string of writing project rejections. Tim suggests he write his father’s war story. Michael doesn’t think that would work because he only knows about the one battle.

INT. MOVIE STUDIO – OFFICE – DAY

Inciting Incident – In a studio pitch meeting no one is interested in the projects Michael has to offer. He pitches Lee’s Korean War story in desperation. The studio loves it.

INT. LEE’S HOUSE – LIVING ROOM – DAY

Turning Point – Lee is older and much more crotchety. Ignoring Lee’s gentle declines of his offer, Michael tries to get Lee to sit down for an interview to get details of his Korean War story. Lee flatly and angrily refuses to tell his story, but tells a little of the story to show why it should not be told.

FLASHBACK

EXT. WOODS – MORNING

It is the 1950s and Lee is a young man on a deer hunt with his father, LOUIS. They both carry rifles as they move carefully through the brush, until Louis sights a 10 point buck and guides Lee through taking the shot.

EXT. LAKE – MORNING

Lee and Louis sit quietly in a small skiff with their poles over opposite side, sipping coffee and taking in the stillness and the grandeur of the forested mountains on all sides.

INT. JONES FAMILY HOME – KITCHEN – DAY

Lee and Louis enter with their poles and the trout they caught. With trepidation, Lee’s mother, Mae, hands him a letter from the Department of War. Lee opens it to find a draft notice.

END FLASHBACK

Act 2:

EXT. SANTA MONICA BEACH – BIKE PATH – MORNING

New plan – Michael is at a loss for what to do next. His running buddies, Tim and Kevin, help him to hatch a plan to get his daughter to change her History class report from the Vietnam War to the Korean War.

EXT. LEE’S HOUSE – BACKYARD – DAY

Plan in action – Lee and Michael sit on the patio with Michael’s daughter, ANNETTE. Lee gives some background on the 24th Infantry Regiment to his granddaughter until he realizes what Michael is up and testily shuts it down. He then adds some parts of the story so she can finish her report.

FLASHBACK

EXT. POCATELLO TRAIN STATION – DAY

Lee’s family and friends fill the platform waving as Lee and his fellow inductees are separated. The Black men are sent to the back of the train to the “colored” section.

EXT. FORT BENNING – DAY

Lee and the other recruits go through basic training. Lee impresses the Sergeants with how well he handles a rifle. They make him a marksmanship instructor.

END FLASHBACK

INT. AMERICAN LEGION HALL – DAY

Midpoint Turning Point – Michael’s running buddy, Kevin, is with the American Legion. He introduces Michael to an advocate for Korean War veterans who wants to honor those vets before they die by bringing them to South Korea.

INT. LEE’S HOUSE – KITCHEN – DAY

Michael pitches the all-expense paid trip to Seoul for the two of them to Lee. Lee hates the idea. Tells Michael about the last time he was taken to Korea.

FLASHBACK

EXT. SAN FRANCISCO BAY – LIBERTY SHIP – DAY

Lee stands shoulder to shoulder with other Black soldiers at the ship’s railing. They watch the city recede in the distance as they set out to sea for the next three weeks.

EXT. DAY – OKINAWA U.S. ARMY BASE – DAY

Lee and the other new recruits meet up with the 24th Infantry Regiment. They see the drinking, smoking, and drug use. Lee took up smoking because anyone who didn’t had to run laps during smoke breaks. They all train and learn the unit’s combat tactics. Then they all get loaded on a ship bound for Korea.

END FLASHBACK

INT. AMERICAN LEGION HALL – NIGHT

Lee grudgingly comes to the American Legion Hall with Michael and his family for a presentation by the beautiful Korean War veterans advocate. During the presentation, the advocate gets down on her knees, bows her head to the floor, rises and passionately requests that Lee accept the invitation to come to Korea.

Act 3:

INT. INCHON AIRPORT – BAGGAGE CLAIM – DAY

Rethink everything – Michael and Lee, along with 30 other Korean War veterans, are brought to Seoul with the highest honors and first class luxury. South Koreans believe they would not have a country without the bravery of these veterans. Lee is hating every moment.

INT. EXPENSIVE SEOUL RESTAURANT – DAY

The Korean hosts present a sumptuous banquet of Korean delicacies. Lee won’t touch it. Out of his pocket Lee pulls packets of cheese and crackers he brought from home. Michael wants to know why Lee is being so rude. Lee tells him how the 24th Infantry was treated in Korea.

FLASHBACK

EXTERIOR – KOREAN COUNTRYSIDE – BIVOUAC – NIGHT

Lee and his fellow soldier prepare for a night patrol. They complain bitterly about their WWII surplus weapons, uniforms, and even their field rations.

EXTERIOR – KOREAN COUNTRYSIDE – NIGHT

Lee’s patrol moves in the dark to deliberately trigger an ambush, call in an artillery strike on their own position, and then run like hell. That was their job, night after night. Live bait.

END FLASHBACK

INT. LOTTE WORLD HOTEL – LEE & MICHAEL’S SUITE – NIGHT

Lee and Michael are in their queen beds supposedly sleeping, but Michael is wide awake, horrified. In his sleep, Lee is sweating, thrashing and loudly reliving a battle that is not going well.

EXT. SEOUL CITY STREET – DAY

Michael is out for a run on the early morning streets of Seoul. On the phone with his friends half way around the world back at home he comes up with another plan.

INT. LOTTE WORLD HOTEL – BALLROOM – DAY

New plan – Over a lavish breakfast buffet that even Lee can’t turn up his nose at, Michael speaks privately with their Korean hosts to get their help in telling Lee’s war story. They will make Lee part of a documentary for the Korean War Museum to get Lee to open up about his Korean War service.

INT. LOTTE WORLD HOTEL – LEE & MICHAEL’S SUITE – NIGHT

Turning Point: Huge failure / Major shift – Their South Korean hosts show up in their hotel suite with an entire documentary crew. Lee feels completely betrayed by Michael. Seething, Lee tells an innocuous story of “Bed Check Charlie.” The North Koreans would fly over their camp at one or two in the morning in these old Russian biplanes and randomly drop hand grenades and then leave. They caused a whole bunch of chaos in the camp and nobody would get any sleep. Lee confronts Michael vowing to die with his story before storming out.

INT. LOTTE WORLD HOTEL – BAR – NIGHT

Michael finds Lee sitting in the bar sipping tea. Michael tries to apologize and wants to know if it was really that relentlessly bad?

FLASHBACK

The best part of the patrols was dealing with the locals. They seemed to like G.I.s OK. Lee gave his Hershey bars to some kids in one of the villages they passed through. When he figured out they had never had chocolate before, he got his buddies to give up their Hershey bars, too. The kid’s parents got a kick out of the whole thing. That was a good day. Nobody died.

END FLASHBACK

Act 4:

SEOUL BUSINESS ASSOCIATION – AUDITORIUM – NIGHT

Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict – Michael feels failure is at hand, but he has a stroke of inspiration, or luck or both. At the farewell dinner for the veterans, the four-star General in command of all U.S. forces in South Korean is there and Michael introduces himself. Michael tells him about his father, and the General knows the history of the 24th Infantry Regiment, knows how they were mistreated, and knows how they died. The General talks to Lee, renders a salute, shakes his hand, and thanks him for his service. Lee is moved. Michael and Lee step outside and through tears Lee tells the final terrible part of his Korean War service.

FLASHBACK

The worst part of my time in Korea was the Chinese spring offensive of 1951. We were winning. We pushed the North Korean forces all the way up around the Yalu river bordering China. Well China didn’t like that. They quietly infiltrated the area with more than a million soldiers disguised as refugees. They struck in three waves. Our unit, Company K with 200 men of the 24th Regiment, was moving up a valley floor. The white mechanized units were up on the ridges on either side covering our flanks. They got word of the wave of Chinese soldiers and made a retreat. They never mentioned anything to us Black soldiers down in the valley. We got with no support. We were encircled pretty quickly. We hunkered down and dug our foxholes. We held our ground and fought to a stalemate. But there were too many of them. Our officers were killed and we ran out of ammunition. We made some grenade and bayonet attacks, but our guys were cut down or driven back until it was just hand to hand fighting where the man you killed breathed his last breath in your face. When the sun came up I was back in my foxhole with my buddy’s body torn apart next to me. I saw the Chinese soldiers walking through our casualties, checking to see if anyone was alive. When they found a live one, they shot him where he lay. They weren’t taking any prisoners. I played dead. I lay there in my foxhole in the mud and played dead.

END FLASHBACK

EXT. LAKE – MORNING

Resolution – Lee and Michael sit quietly in a small skiff with their poles over opposite sides of the boat, sipping coffee and taking in the stillness and the grandeur of the forested mountains on all sides. Lee writes the script and sells it, saving his home and perhaps his marriage.

INT. LEE’S HOUSE – BEDROOM – NIGHT

Lee finally gets a good night’s sleep.