Lesson 8

[CJ Lyons]

CJ’s Intrigue Patterns

What I learned from this assignment was that I tend to lean on the same patterns to build intrigue: A. Establish something shocking and point to the terrible things it could mean and F. A Pattern that Leads to Future Consequences

So I broke that pattern by finding one sentence and turning it into a question, another turned into a suggestion of more below the surface, a third became a strong statement of the mystery.

Not only was I able to trim my concept doing this, but it reads so much better now!

[Lloyd Shellenberger]

Working hard every day to become the best writer I can be and as a result I do become the best writer in Hollywood.

What I learned from this assignment was how to take the character descriptions and redid them according to the exercise. I still have alot to learn to get this right lol

[Brian Bull]

BRIAN BULL – Intrigue Patterns

“What I learned from doing this assignment is…
I can always make things more intriguing.

I also have been spending a lot of time researching the Psychic Realm because I learned I know very little about it and therefore if I am going to have a TV show about the Psychic Realm I must educate myself more – this will help it making the show much more intriguing and it will add depth and layers and layers. I believe it is already paying off.

ASSIGNMENT

Using Intrigue Patterns, describe some aspect of your story or characters.

1. Pull out your TV Pitch Bible. Read through it and find ONE line you would like to be more intriguing.

2. Rethink that line using ALL of these patterns, as I did above:
A. Establish something shocking and point to the terrible things it could mean.
B. Strong statement; question about something underhanded beneath the surface.
C. Question that points to hidden agendas, hidden identity, conspiracy, etc..
D. Character 1 is convinced/worried/wondering that Character 2 has done _____________.
E. But maybe it is all wrong.
F. A Pattern that Leads to Future Consequences
G. If he does ________________, that means ___Intrigue_____.
H. State the mystery.
I. Should be/could be _______, but it is even worse.
J. Intense language.

3. If you discover a more intriguing version of the line, replace the old one in the TV Pitch Bible.

I didn’t like the way my WORLD portion was and so I focused and that and wanted to elevate it with more INTRIGUE.

Old Version

WORLD

Having the ability to see the future…
…a love-stricken Optometrist witnesses a murder…
…and he must stop it from happening.

Unique Sub-World: The Psychics Realm
Previously unexplored: Glasses enabling you to see the future
The unknown: How the future relates to the present
The unseen: Betrayals and misinterpretations
Unheard of Dangers: Not everything is as it might appear
Reasons to explore it: A chance to make the things right, better

New Version

WORLD

Jim Brown unintentionally enters the Psychic Realm when he creates a pair of glasses from a crystal ball. The future, the present and the past are all right there in front of him, however Jim must learn how to interpret and navigate the visions he “sees” or suffer the consequences. Jim’s naive at first believing the world is good but soon discovers the true power of the psychic glasses when he “sees” the evil that lurks all around. Jim quickly realizes there is the ordinary world and then there is the Psychic Realm.