Lesson 9

[dave korr]

Dave Korr’s phone pitch lesson 9
Hi Mr. Smith, I’m Dave Korr and I was wondering if you’d like to hear my quick pitch for a JAWS meets FALLOUT action-sitcom I’ve created, called SHARK STANK? Thanks. SHARK STANK is a serial action sit-com – like JAWS meets FALLOUT – set on a slowly sinking mega-yacht, where a cute and klutzy Do-Gooder must battle: a vengeful Schwarzenegger wannabe, his sadistic, drugged-up Fart Shark, and Satan himself, to save her hot and often-naked teen pals from getting eaten – and not in the good way. Even with special effects, I think you can produce an 8-episode season at about a half-million per episode, a bit higher if you can sign Ron Perlman to play Satan, who’s constant schemes to blackmail the cute and klutzy heroine always backfire spectacularly. I’d try to find the next teen Anna Farris to play the heroine. My SHARK STANK pilot is 25 pages that end with bang, as Satan causes the heroine to crash and burn their mega-yacht, which drifts out to sea. I saw your company as a natural fit to produce SHARK STANK, as you have had success producing action-sitcoms like ANGIE TRIBECCA and WRECKED. And the 8-episode season ends with an even bigger bang as our heroine faces off with the vengeful Schwarzenegger Wannabe, then his drugged-up Fart Shark, and finally the super-sized Satan to keep her from having to replace Satan on the throne of Hell. If you like the concept, I’d be happy to send you the pilot script.

[Eden De Ruse-Moore]

Yankee Doodle Daddy – Eden De Ruse-Moore Phone Pitch
What I learned from this lesson is: You can give a pitch over the phone but it needs to be short and specific to the production company.
Write out your phone pitch along with answers to the questions:

1) I will lead with :
• High Concept: Hi, I’m Eden De Ruse-Moore, and I have a Pregnant POTUS script where the husband a former Yankee ballplayer must become Mother Goose.

2) Script for phone call pitches:

• Credibility: I’m an optioned screenwriter, my screenplay Yankee Doodle Daddy was a recent finalist in the New York Metropolitan Screenwriters and Film Awards.
• Great Title: Hi I’m Eden De Ruse-Moore and I have a feel-good, dramedy titled Yankee Doodle Daddy.
• Business Hook: Hi I’m Eden De Ruse-Moore and I have a screenplay similar to Barbie but with a unique focus.

3) Give us a one or two sentence answer to the questions a producer may ask:
• What’s the budget range? – Mid Budget $15 to 30 Million
• Who do you see in the main roles? – Joe Harley – Former Yankee ballplayer: Jake Gyllenhaal; Glen Powel; Theo James; Zena Harley – POTUS: Jennifer Lawrence; Anna Kendrick; Eliza Gonzalez Jefferson –Grandfather: Patrick Stewart; Liam Neeson/ Benji – Former Yankee Coach: James Gandolfini. Agent Carter – Secret Service: Daryl McCormack, Rege-Jean Page
• How many pages is the script? 120 pages
• Who else has seen this? ScreenCraft Fellowship Review Panel
• Why do you think this fits our company?
My story aligns with films that you have previously, produced. Yankee Doodle Daddy is a high concept script and by design it is similar to the box office hit film, Barbie. Which makes it enticing to investors. The film uses comedy to address serious issues of identity, parenthood and the pressures of public office, ensuring that there is small scale drama and macro-political scandals baked into the core concept.
• How does the movie end? POTUS thwarts a Russian invasion, Joe regains his identity and his true love and support for his wife deepens. He testifies before Babygate, his arguments save the day. He declares to the media, that as The First Daddy he will continue to raise his daughter to be just like her mommy, so she can grow up to be a strong leader.

• This reply was modified 1 year ago by  Eden De Ruse-Moore.
• This reply was modified 1 year ago by  Eden De Ruse-Moore.

[dave korr]

Dave Korr’s revised phone pitch for lesson:
Hi Mr. Spielberg, I’m a creator of action-sitcom pilots. I was wondering if you had time to hear a 10-second pitch for my latest pilot. Cool. It’s a serial action-sitcom called SHARK STANK. It’s like JAWS, stalking clueless teens on a sinking yacht. (Spielberg says: cool, send me the pilot). Glad to. Which email address should I send it to and when would you like me to follow up? (he give address). Great! I’ll send it right out and get back to you this Monday. Great chatting with you. Bye.

[William Whalen]

William Whelan – Phone Pitch
What I learned from this lesson is to formulate a phone pitch.

1. Tell us which of the four strategies you are going to use to open your pitch:
• Lead with credibility. Certificate in Screenwriting from UCLA
• Lead with a great title. Lady Wiseguy
• Lead with a strong business hook. Lady Wiseguy is Pygmalion meets Goodfellas with a dash of Thelma and Louise.
• Lead with a High Concept. Liza, a mafia princess, who wishes to break with the family and pursue her dream of becoming an actor and sophisticated lady.
2. Give us your script for phone call pitches, like I did above.
• Hello, my name is William Whelan, and I have written a RomCom/Thriller screenplay titled Lady Wiseguy. It is the story of Liza, a mafia princess, who wishes to break with the family and pursue her dream of becoming an actor and sophisticated lady. Lady Wiseguy is Pygmalion meets Goodfellas with a dash of Thelma and Louise. I would appreciate the opportunity to pitch you my screenplay at your earliest convenience since I think it is a good fit for your production company.
3. Give us a one or two sentence answer to the questions a producer may ask:
• What’s the budget range? Low budget $500,000 to 5 million dollars.
• Who do you see in the main roles? Liza – Hailee Steinfeld; Professor Shaw – Hugh Grant; Big Dom – Robert DeNiro; Vito – Tom Hardy
• How many pages is the script? 100
• Who else has seen this? No one.
• Why do you think this fits our company? You do RomComs as well as Thrillers.
• How does the movie end? Liza flees Brooklyn after Vito puts a contract out on her and reconnects with Professor Shaw in Cambridge, England.

[Rebecca Sukle]

Rebecca’s Phone Pitch
What I learned from this lesson is how to judge what is the important information to include in your pitch to interest a producer and keep it to bare bones. By using the guide to make my decisions, I was able to keep it lean, easy to remember and deliver.
1. I choose to lead with my High Concept:
2. Hi, I’m RS Sukle. I have a Forrest Gump-type series about the four wives of Sherwood Anderson, an influential early 20th-century writer.
Pause
If asked about the pilot script:
Many Wives is an historic drama inspired by true events.
A business tycoon risks everything for literary fame, but spirals into a mental breakdown. To secure their children’s future in a patriarchal society, his wife secretly partners with a courtesan brothel owner to create a thriving venture.
3. Answers for Producer Questions:
Budget range? The series pilot budget might be around 3 million. A season of 8 episodes could cost 24 to 26 million.
Who do you see in the main roles? Kenneth Branagh as Sherwood because of the resemblance. Anne Hathaway as Cornelia, because I think she can play an intelligent and gracious society woman, who is a feminist at heart.
How many pages is the script? 70
Who else has seen this? Sophie Elwood
Company fit? It’s about the resilience of women in a strict patriarchal society.
How the movie ends? It ends with a cliffhanger, Sherwood act erratic, runs off, and disappears.

• This reply was modified 12 months ago by  Rebecca Sukle.

[Paul McGregor]

Paul’s Phone Pitch
4. What I learned from this assignment is that I will have to pick up the phone and do what I hesitate greatly to do, but with these tools, maybe I can be less intimidated by the challenge.
1. Strategy: I would start with High Concept.
2. “Hello. My name’s P.M. May I run a quick pitch past you? Thank you. This is a drama. The title is FRANK. If someone threatened to destroy your family, wouldn’t you want to see them pushing up daisies?”
3. Budget range: Low, $1-5 million.
Who do you see in main roles: Liam Neeson often plays the underdog who fights back and wreaks vengeance. I would like to see someone like him in the lead role.
How many pages: 105 pages.
Who else has seen this? You are the first producer I have contacted.
Why do you think it fits our company? I have looked at imdb.pro and your company has produced movies with similar story lines.
How does the movie end?: “The protagonist, a retired Canadian logger, has to learn new skills to go after the lawyers and bankers who are threatening his family, but when he goes after the junky son-in-law, who is also threatening to destroy his family, he uses his years’ long skills as a logger. First, he introduces the junky to a huge wood-chipper machine and later he delivers a bag of sawdust to the junky’s parents, for use on their manicured garden.
If you like what you have heard, I would be very glad to send you the script.”

END

• This reply was modified 12 months ago by  Paul McGregor.

[Janis Pryor]

Lesson Nine Janis A. Pryor
What I learned: Phone pitches can be less terrifying than I imagined, but it’s still my least favorite way of pitching!

Write out your phone pitch along with answers to the questions.
Tell us which of the four strategies you are going to use to open
your pitch: High Concept

Script for phone call pitches.
Is there life after death? The female lead in this interracial love story says, “Yes.” Based on a true story, these two highly intelligent adults, who’ve been circling each other for years are brought together by synchronicities thqt defy logical explanation. The female lead, a Black Indian with European blood, was born with a veil (or caul) over her face. She succumbs to her powers, when the male lead dies in a boating accident. Her psychic powers are verified by his sister…and most dramatically when he materializes in the female lead’s bedroom. Through her powers they stay connected.

• What’s the budget range? …$30 to $50 million
• Who do you see in the main roles? Tony Goldwyn & Kerry Washington
• How many pages is the script? 96 pages
• Who else has seen this? My manager-agent, Judith Moose, Denise David Williams optioned the story by Make Magic Productions. We did not renew the option.
• Why do you think this fits our company? It aligns with the iconic movie you produced in the early 90s, Bodyguard* only deeper.
• How does the movie end? After yearning and praying for him to materialize from the other side to the point where she touch/feel him for one last conversation, he does. She finds him sitting on the edge of her bed.

(*In addition to Bodyguard, Ghost – both produced in the early nineties roughly two years apart, and way before that, A Man & A Woman. BTW, Channing Tatum’s production company is rebooting Ghost, “But we’re going to do something different.”)

[Michael Wallace]

Michael Wallace – Phone Pitch
What I learned from this lesson is to target your phone pitches to Producers that have produced films in your genre and budget range, focusing on the Hook or High Concept to grab their attention.
Lead with Title and High Concept – I’m Michael Wallace and I have a dramedy called the “The Kid from Lynbrook”, which is about how a twelve-year-old inadvertently takes down the Wolf of Wall Street.
Budget Range $2 -3 million Dollars
Lead roles – I like Miles Teller, Ryan Gosling, and Chris Evans for the male lead, I like Rachel McAdams and Emily Blunt for the female lead, Noah Jupe or Ian Armitage for the Child lead and Paul Giamotti for the Attorney General role.
The script is 107 pages.
I think this is a fit for your company because you’ve have an eye for a great story and had great success in this genre and budget range
In the end, the Wall Street executive sees that the Kid has learned of the hypocrisy of Wall Street from him, and sacrifices himself to save the kid, and win back the girl of his dreams

[Ian Patrick Williams]

Ian’s Phone Pitch
What I learned from this lesson is to have a strong strategy and have ready answers to any questions.
1. Tell us which of the four strategies you are going to use to open your pitch:
Lead with credibility.
Hi, I’m Ian Patrick Williams and I’ve had 2 scripts produced and another currently optioned.
Give us your script for phone call pitches, like I did above.
Can I have a quick minute to pitch you my action thriller The Coming Storm? The Southern Poverty Law Center now says there are 1400 hate groups across our country; collectively, they are now calling for a race war across America. What if the FBI had credible evidence that the event that they were calling for was imminent but decided to slow-walk any preemptive response?
Rookie Black detective MILES ROUSSARD feels he has no choice but to buck the system, confront the neo-Nazi leaders, conduct searches and ultimately follow the man he feels is the one who will trigger the event. Little does he know that they’re setting him up to be the fall guy.
What’s the budget range?
Depending on the above-the-line quotes from talent, I’d guess 3o million.
Who do you see in the main roles?
Lead MILES BROUSSARD: John David Washington; Michael B. Jordan
Partner/mentor SID SILVER: Paul Giamatti, John C. Reilly
White supremacist CARL TILSON; Mads Mikklesen, Walter Goggins
How many pages is the script?
96
Who else has seen this?
You’re the first.
Why do you think this fits our company?
Because of your past success with action films.
How does the movie end?
The protagonist thwarts the white supremacist who was about to assassinate a Governor, thereby preventing the race war. Police and FBI then join Broussard in conducting raids across the country and confiscating their bombs and weaponry.

[Michael HARRIS]

Title: Michael Harris’s Phone Pitch

What I learned in this lesson is that a well-constructed and to the point phone pitch can get a script request.

Using great title and credibility

Hello, my name is Michael Harris and I have a thriller titled, “Simon Sees,” based on the novel by best-selling author Othello Bach and I have the rights.
It’s the story of a 6-year-old clairvoyant who finds his father, who is running an illegal organ farm to keep his “dead” twin brother alive.

It’s in the $1 to $5 million dollar range, $15 to $30 with my preferred cast.

Emma Watson as the female lead; LaKeith Stanfield (Haunted Mansion) or Timothee Chalamet as her love interest Kevin; Johnny Depp or Bill Mumy, as the villain, Dr. Whitcombe.

99 pages

A few other independent producers.

I’m coming to your company today because I believe our visions align. I liked xyz film because it told a story beyond the genre which is my goal with Simon Sees. I think we could enjoy a great partnership.

How does it end: Long Version:
Simon & Elise escape from the catacombs under Dr. Whitcombe’s nursing facility, “Tommy’s Hope,” discovering along the way it is an organ farm. When they find the real Tommy, long-presumed dead alive they realize the organ farm exists to keep him alive. Tommy creates a distraction allowing Simon and Elise to escape. Tommy dies, Whitcombe is a broken man and Simon and Elise adopt one another.

Short version:
Simon and Elise uncover an organ farm under Dr. Whitcombe’s facility.
Tommy sacrifices himself, allowing Simon and Elise to escape and adopt each other.

• This reply was modified 11 months, 1 week ago by  Michael HARRIS.

[Pamela Milton]

Pamela’s Phone Pitch
What I learned from this lesson is that less is more. Producers pitch and take pitches. They know what it to get things done. Use their format or guide and you have a better chance of pitching your script.
1 – I choose to use High Concept approach.
2 – Hello my name is Pamela; may I have a moment to present a film concept to you? Yes? This is a dramedy titled the Great Bank Robbery of 1934.
Two strong willed women collide in a hail of bullets, embezzlement and ballet shoes when an aspiring dancer takes leadership of the inept Chutney Gang in 1934 only to run afoul an ambitious IRS agent investigating bank fraud in 1980.
3 – Producer’s Questions
Budget scale: 15 to 30 million depending on if the main character in both 1934 and 1980 play both versions of themselves or another actor is hired to play the younger/older version i.e. in Men in Black 3, present day, Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) is played by Josh Brolin in the 1969 timeline.

Actors: (wish list)
Tempest – Michelle Phifer
McKenna – Ashley Judd
Zebulon – Robert de Niro Sam Elliot
Narrator – James Earl Jones
Relatives of the actors could be used to play the younger/older role i.e., June Lockhart and Ann Lockhart, Miquel Ferrier and Joze Ferrier

Number of pages – 100
Who else has seen the script – I have just started calling producers today.
Why contact us – You produced several films in this genre and budget range.
How does it end – In the year that follows, Tempest and Zebulon reconcile, McKenna and Samuel separate, and Caruthers goes to prison. The “marriage” of Chaz and Melville bring McKenna and Samuel together once more with McKenna becoming Samuel’s deputy. The Chutney Gang retire o a private island to spend their remaining days robbing banks in prefab 1930’s towns.