lesson 9 Assignment

[Michael Christopher]

Subject Line: Michael Christopher, Phone Pitch

What I learned from this lesson is, how to quickly convey what I have to offer and what’s most important to the listener.

Strategy: Lead with high concept.

In search of “The Perfect Lover”, a woman gets a sexy AI robot and tangles with its human doppelganger.

In the middle budget range.

Emily Blunt would be great for the female lead with her husband John Krasinski playing her early lover. And Ian Nelson would be great for the enticing male lead, playing the robot and the doppelganger.

It’s 110 pages

JW at the Page Awards gave it a consider rating after developing it with her.

You have done romantic comedies in this budget range.

In the end, after she resigns herself to the fact she won’t have a relationship, let alone a perfect lover, out of left field, a white knight rides in.

[Joan Butler]

Phone Pitch

Hi,

I’m an award-winning screenwriter. The transition house in my script is based on my experience in a transition house. The story is about brainwashing and domestic abuse.

Have we worked with you before?

–No.

How did you find us?

–ImdbPro or

— I came to this company because:

– You make low budget movies

-You make movies centered around women

Do you have representation?

–No.

What’s the budget range

–Probably: $1 million to $5 million

Who do you see in the main roles?

–Naomie Harris

–Claire Danes

–Charlie Hunnam

How many pages is the script?

–110

Who else has seen this?

–No one

How does the movie end?

–Set-up: The villain tries to kidnap his brainwash victim.

–Pay-off: The hero risks her life to save the brainwash victim and the villain is arrested.

–(Epilogue: The hero and the former victim cheer with other domestic abuse survivors. We see the “welcome” sign on the transition house door that we saw in the opening scene.)

Why do you think it fits our company?

–You make low budget movies.

–You make dramatic movies about social issues.

–You make movies about women’s issues.

I learned that, in theory, this is easier than I thought. Now I have to find the courage to do it. (I have promised myself to do one more course, then go for it.)

[Heather Hood]

Heather’s
Phone Pitch

What
I learned from this lesson is:

I really need to learn how to make things short and to the point!

1. Tell us which of the four strategies you are going to use to open your pitch:

Lead with credibility. -THIS ONE

2. Give us your script for phone call pitches, like I did above.

Hi I’m Heather Hood and I have 25 years as a psychiatric nurse helping survivors of the Residential schools. Could I tell you about a true story from a residential survivor, but switched up and told from the point of view of a dying priest who needs forgiveness before he passes?

3. Give us a one or two sentence answer to the questions a producer may ask:

What’s the budget range?

Not more than 30 mm

Who do you see in the main roles?

Gabriel Byrne – Father John Ambrose and , Zoe Leigh Hopkins – Jody Youngblood

How many pages is the script?

100

Who else has seen this?

It has been shown to a few producers at several contests.

Why do you think this fits our company?

(Assuming I am talking to Paul Gross) When you wrote Paschendale, you said in an interview you carried a picture in your head of a tale your Grandfather told. He had stabbed a German soldier in the head with a bayonet. It became a powerful image in the movie. My mother told me a story of how she had been disciplined in a homemade electric chair in the basement of St. Anne’s in Ontario. That image stayed with me, and like you, I wrote that into the script.

How does the movie end?

After giving his testimony against the headmaster of the school – now a respected Cardinal – and producing evidence of his horrible crimes, Father John Ambrose is forgiven. The Cree who have come to love him take him out to the wilderness to let him die where God is visible in everything. The priest who had lost his faith finds it again before he dies. The Cree who had lost their respect for the church find it again in the one priest who found the courage to ask for forgiveness.

[Cody Jarrett]

LESSON 9

Cody Jarrett’s Phone Pitch

What I learned from this lesson is the phone pitch is really similar to the fast in-person pitch.

1. Lead with credibility… Hey, Mark! It’s Cody Jarrett, I just finished writing and directing the ____________ with __________ and ____________. Oh, and we have a common friend, ____________.

2. In any event, I just finished a new comedy, West Hollywood Cougars. It’s essentially First Wives Club on the softball field — three housewives get revenge on their cheating husbands where it will hurt ’em the most — the softball field. The husbands are all on the same team, so the wives form their own team to get in their face.

3.

The budget is mid-budget.

The three leads are women in their 40’s-50’s, so women like Kristin Wiig, Kiersten Dunst, Reese Witherspoon, Kate Hudson would be ideal. Husbands: Seth Rogen, William Fichtner.

It’s 107 pages

Other views: my attorney, one actor _________, and a friend in development who also teaches screenwriting classes.

This is exactly what you guys (gals) do so well, many times in the past.

The ending is:

The film opens with one husband, Peter, shooting cellphone video of himself getting blown by his mistress, who is not only his boss’ daughter, but also his pitcher’s wife. Later in the story, Peter’s ex-wife Barbara quits the Cougars & goes back to him. But on game day she finds the cellphone video.

The ending is game day, wives vs the husbands. the husbands are winning and it’s the bottom of the ninth. The Cougars are at bat, full count, one pitch left, bases loaded and all four players need to score to win.

Barbara rushes the cellphone footage to the field and just before that final pitch is thrown, she has it put up on the jumbotrons for everyone to see. Seeing video of his wife blowing his teammate Peter, the pitcher immediately nails Peter in the head with the ball and a brawl ensues. The women easily run the bases and win the game.

[Cassie Richardson]

Cassie Richardson’s Phone Pitch – I have a Christmas Romantic Comedy called Breakfast With Santa. Can I pitch it to you?

What I learned from this lesson is that putting together a phone pitch is easy after completing the earlier exercises. Also, that silences are good and no isn’t necessary rejection.

Strategy: Lead with a great title

I have a Christmas Romantic Comedy called BREAKFAST WITH SANTA. It’s Emily in Paris meets Baby Boom, featuring an African American cast.

3. Responses to questions a producer may ask:

What’s the budget range? Low budget: $500k to $5 million

Who do you see in the main roles? Brianna Reynolds = Someone like Amanda Seals, Brianna’s Ex = Someone like Brooks Darnell, Black Santa = Someone like Common or Deon Cole.

How many pages is the script? It’s in treatment form now. The full, 9-Act script will run 95 – 100 pages.

Who else has seen this? So far, you are the first.

Why do you think this fits our company? Well, I saw, INSERT MOVIE TITLE and MOVIE TITLE. Breakfast With Santa is in that same wheelhouse.

How does the movie end? In the beginning Brianna, our heroine, loses everything after a chance encounter with Black Santa. After fish out of water fun and rebranding the fledgling town into America’s favorite Christmas destination, Brianna goes back to the city with a bigger promotion, professional respect and more perks than she dreamed…but that life no longer fits. So, with Black Santa’s help, Brianna rushes back to small town nowhere just in time for the crucial Breakfast With Santa parade on Christmas Day and a kiss with her ex under the mistletoe.

[Joy Smith]

Joy Smith’s Phone Pitch

<u style=””>What I learned from this lesson is…

I really struggle with initial part of this – I’m doubting whether or not what I have is strong enough to pitch, based on the criteria above and the examples that have already been posted by other students.

Any feedback would be much appreciated!

Write out your phone pitch along with answers to the questions.

1. Tell us which of the four strategies you are going to use to open your pitch:

Lead with credibility – definitely no, just a
writer with no competition wins <div>

<u style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Lead with a great title – First Law

<u style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Lead with a strong business hook – it’s an
original idea and I have no funding

<div>

Lead with a High Concept – I have a movie
about the transfer of insanity from one person to another

I struggled with this because I’m doubting whether any of the above are strong enough.

2. Give us your script for phone call pitches, like I did above.

Hi, I’m Joy Geldard-Smith and I have a contained thriller called First Law. Could I run a quick pitch by you?

Would you get yourself committed to advance your career? Cleo would, but once her inside contacts are arrested, she finds herself trapped.

3. Give us a one or two sentence answer to the questions a producer may ask:

What’s the budget range?

I’d see it as up to $5million, as it’s mostly a contained thriller.

Who do you see in the main roles?

For Cleo, I was thinking Jennifer Lawrence, Margot Robbie, Sosie Bacon (or the actor whose production company it is)

How many pages is the script?

The script is 104 pages.

Who else has seen this?

So far, you’re the first.

Why do you think this fits our company?

The lead role of Cleo is a great role for any actor, and is also somewhat timely as mental health and the opioid crisis are explored.

How does the movie end?

At the moment, the movie ends with Cleo being stuck in the care home having had her life devasted and lost everything to the brain-altering medication she is on. I am working on an alternative ending where Cleo is released but doesn’t fully recover, as the medication has permanently changed her brain chemistry.

</div></div>

[Connie Barr]

Connie’s Phone Pitch

What I learned by doing this lesson is…the idea of doing actual phone pitchs is rather unnerving, but being this prepared might make it doable.

1. Credibility and great title strategies:

“Hi, I am Constance Barr, an optioned screenwriter. I have a Rom-Com entitled Love Dance.”

2. Phone pitch script:

“May I share a quick pitch with you?” “Great, thanks.”

Feisty divorcee, Daisy Duncan has sworn off men forever.

She’s obsessed with winning the over-50 National Ballroom Dance Contest, but she needs a new partner – pronto! Daisy’s whacky old daddy comes to the rescue, and sends her a hunky candidate.

Buck, his personal penis pump salesman!

Against all odds, Daisy starts to fall for him, and they practice hard for the contest. But when she heads to Dallas for the finals, he’s a no-show. Unknown to her, he’s been critically injured, so she angrily ghosts him!

Can Daisy win the contest AND the love lottery?

3. Answers to potential questions:

Budget Range= $1-5 million

Main roles= Female protagonist – Connie Britton or Diane Lane

Male lead – Jason Bateman or Mads Mikklesen

Page count= 109

Who has seen this? = No other producers, fellow writers who have provided feedback.

Why does this fit your company? The comedy, Finding Your Feet that your company produced has a similar vibe.

How does the movie end? = A surprise person helps Daisy and Buck finally reconnect and overcome the past disputes. We see them dancing under the mistletoe at the library holiday party where he proposes. In the final scene they are dancing under the Eiffel Tower deliriously happy in each other’s arms.

[Walter Stewart]

Walter Stewart – Phone Pitch

What I learned by doing this assignment is that you have 1 -2 minutes to peak the assistants interest.

Title: Walter Stewart – Phone Pitch

Great Title: Shytown

Pitch:

Hello, my name is Walter Stewart, I have a melodrama titled Shytown. Period piece set in the 1980s in Chicagoland with the backdrop of the party-music scene featuring House Music.

Budget: $15 million to $30 million

I see Austin Butler (protagonist) being perfect for this role because he was a great dancer in Elvis. Additionally, he’s young enough and delivers a great character arc. I believe that Common would be a perfect fit for this movie because he acted with great range. We would have to work on the makeup but they are both musically inclined. Additionally, he’s from Chicago and a good friend with my ex-girlfriend. It’s a feel-good movie with lots of drama and a happy ending.

WKS

• This reply was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by  Walter Stewart.