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Post Day 13 Assignment Here
Reply to post your assignment.
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9 Replies
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Brenda Lynn’s Unique Action!
What I learned doing this assignment is that I really enjoyed trying to find these unique actions. It adds to the intrigue and twists in the story and helps to engage the audience throughout the story.
Here is a list of the top unique changes that I made. The list was quite extensive and fun to brainstorm.
Environment: Setting up the final scene in a warehouse is common, but adding that the Protag is a former gymnast and walks the beams and does flips on the beams is unique.
Villain: The villain is going to struggle with his feelings for the Protag. It catches him off guard because he is seen as a cold-hearted killer.
Mission: To return stolen artwork to the original owners. I swapped out the ending when the Protag figures out that the FBI is not trustworthy.
Struggle: The guns are useless in the warehouse because of the scaffolding. The final scene is hand-to-hand combat.
Unique Skillset: Protag is a former gymnast with martial art skills. This pays off in the final scene on the beam.
Weapon: Her own body and her determination.
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Rebecca’s Unique Action
What I learned from this assignment that by brainstorming different possibilities, a really great idea comes forth to up the action and stakes in the story to add intrigue.
Entire story uniqueness
Environment: Coal-mining village in 1927 during a massive strike in the western Pennsylvania coalfields.
Rules: Coal and iron police become the law and above the law as they take away miner’s civil rights.
Villain: Herr Bucholtz, commander of the coal and iron police.
Mission: Ragman (to save the town.) Bucholtz ( to break the strike and the miners using any and all means possible.)
Struggle: Bucholtz singles out Ragman’s family for abuse and death. Ragman must outsmart Bucholtz to save his town and family.
Unique Skillset: Ragman (hunting skills and innovation.) Bucholtz ( commanding men, military strategy, brutality.) Meaning: Ragman ups his involvement to save his family. Bucholtz presses harder to break the strike and Ragman.
Allies: Ragman (his brothers, father-in-law, and young friend.) Bucholtz (Republic Steel, the governor, coal and iron police under his command, Allegheny County Sheriff.
Weapon: (rifle, knife, and slingshot) Bucholtz ( handgun and bull whip.)Brainstorm ways to make one or more of those places unique:
A. What if…? Ragman convinced the township constable to help reign in Bucholtz on private property. What if his younger brother helped the union organize the miners and put himself in danger? What if Ragman could convince union headquarters to help?
B. Take to an extreme. Bucholtz kills Ragman’s brother. Ragman blows up a coal-tipple. Bucholtz brings in a machine gun to mow down the miners and their families at a planned rally.
C. Specific to character or environment. What if Ragman convinces a top coal and iron guard to defect and spy for him. What if his brother confronts the union bosses for abandoning the struggling miners.
D. Shocking or Surprising: Bucholtz was the 17th man that Ragman refused to kill after wiping out his entire unit during the war in France. In the end the horse kills Bucholtz or did he.
E. Go opposite. What if a union official replaces Ragman’s brother to lead the march and collide with Ragman to kill Bucholtz.
F. What haven’t we seen? Bucholtz gets away with murder. Ragman even’s the score. Ragman’s brother hires a reporter make public the abuses in Russellton by the coal and iron police and Republic Steel and encourages the ACLU and the several US Senators to investigate.I added a scene with a young reporter friend of Ragman’s brother who sends reports to a US senator that prompts and investigation. This adds pressure on Bucholtz, after seven months of effort, to use quick decisive action to end the strike by killing a few miners to bring the rest inline. His failure drives him to bouts of insanity, a loose cannon ready to explode. He set up a machine gun and gunner to open fire on the crowd at the rally after he shoots the organizer. How can Ragman stop him?
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Cameron Martin’s Unique Action!
What I learned doing this assignment is…There’s more than one way to tell a story. I’ve already gone pretty balls-to-the-wall with many of my ideas from when I first starting writing this almost a decade ago as a low-budget, noir type flick. What started as a contained detective story (Post-human “Chinatown”) morphed into a 100 million dollar action extravaganza, where the original line that inspired the script isn’t even found in the current version or even this concept. What’s more is that the brainstorming of this course took many of the established set pieces, characters, and overall world of my original over-the-top screenplay to even greater extremes. So, when I saw the “Take to an extreme” section, I decided instead of elevating a couple of set pieces to new extraordinary heights, I’d instead “Go opposite” and take these concepts back to the story’s roots and see if they could be adapted into something “low-budget.” Don’t know yet if this is the direction I’ll be going or if I’ll just write two screenplays with different budgets in mind. But hey, there’s more than one way to tell this story.
Looking at your entire story, what is unique about each of these places:<div>
Environment: Post-Apocalyptic world based on Judeo-Christian iconography (a “heaven” above and a “hell” below)
Rules: The people of Arcadia don’t die – they’re reincarnated into robotic surrogates. The villain and his creations can hack any machine and have the ability to copy themselves.
Villain: An artificially intelligent computer virus that’s hundreds of years old and decimated the world beyond recognition to make it into his own vision
Mission: To bring someone back from the literal dead. To end Adam’s control over humanity.
Struggle: To determine what is moral for oneself by fighting through the manipulations of your closest confidants. Struggle with guilt. Fighting with more powerful machines
Unique Skillset: The ability to hack any machine and make copies of oneself
Meaning: Each conflict pits Janus against a different opponent that challenges her beliefs and forces her toward her own self-actualization and determining her own morality
Allies: Calvex, Janus’ Copy (to a point)
Weapon: advanced hacking technology. Melee weapons (spears, axes). The mechanical inhabitants themselves
2. Brainstorm ways to make one or more of those places unique:
A. What if…?
The world of this story isn’t vast, but rather takes place in a single city block or borough?
B. Take to an extreme.
Janus’ whole story is limited to that small borough, and is only one of many in a post-human world
C. Specific to character or environment.
Thinking low-budget, what if this took place in a high rise building that had a basement that extended just as far?
D. Shocking or Surprising.
Similar to 1984 or Attack on Titan, what if everything we know about the outside world is a lie conceived by Adam to keep followers in line?
E. Go opposite.
If Janus has a dark side in the story, just from copying herself once, would Adam have an alternate side to him? Is the Adam we see his dark side, most superior, or one of many Adam’s that exist in the world. Could there be an empathetic Adam, or did the version of him that we see kill that side of him.
F. What haven’t we seen?
Each room and floor of this supposed building can shift and reboot itself, like the furniture and decorations are digitally created constructs that you can physically interact with. Anytime someone wants a change of scenery, they can without having to do any heavy lifting – everything at the push of a button, including obstacles, weapons, and monsters
Not really going to change much from what I have action-wise in the 100 million dollar version of this script/concept, as either the action that is present was chosen for a reason (clarity of story/theme, familiarity in an unfamiliar world, etc.). BUT, I will be taking many of those set-pieces and adapting them into a grounded, lower-budget type of film. I like the idea that Janus’ story and stakes don’t have world-altering consequences because I think the themes of finding your own beliefs resonates more in a smaller world. Personally, I’ve never been a fan of the idea that one person’s morality is justified or superior to another’s, and placing the belief Janus acquires as the overall liberating force of mankind feels a little hoity toity. Keeping it limited, however, allows the argument to still be made while letting the audience ultimately decide for themselves what to think. Plus, it also helps elevate what the character, Adam, is all about – how a perceived religious or moral figure can manipulate an audience into thinking his/her world is the only one that exists.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by Cameron Martin.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by
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Assignment: Lesson 13 Making Action Unique
Subject line: Joan Edwards Unique Action!
What I learned doing this assignment is that when you have several things that are unique about your screenplay, it makes it stand out from the rest of the stories that may be similar in plot.
ASSIGNMENT:
Pick at least one action scene that you want to make more unique. Then use this process to generate ideas.
1. Looking at your entire story, what is unique about each of these places:
Environment: middle sized city
in the middle of Wyoming tenth largest state and has the lowest population
state with low population, 567,000 for whole state . Pleasant Grove or
Logan Utah has about 30,000 population. It’s close to the mountains.I like Pleasant Grove as a name because it’s not very pleasant when people con you out of money. But I shouldn’t use a real name.
Cheyenne has 67,000 people.
Rules: When you do good, 2
steps prohibit the evil one from succeeding one step. What if the bank had
a rule that the person who opened an account for you could have access to
it.
Villain: Uses fire to destroy
evidence. The forensics people used the latest in technology to figure out how
it was started and perhaps evidence of who started it.
Mission: Not only get justice
for the people in the neighborhood but stop Ansaca and people like him
from working in the bank business similar to the sex offender listing for
neighborhoods.
Struggle: What if they end up
fighting on the roof and a blade of the helicopter knocks Ansaca off the
building. Or what if there was a big oven and Ansaca stood in front of the
open door. One kick from Bladen sends Ansaca into the big oven.
Unique Skillset: Security,
fighting, cooking,
Meaning: Saves people’s homes
and savings and also helps homeless train for jobs in the bank to take it
over.
Allies: People who have been
tricked into signing 2<sup>nd</sup> mortgages; people in old neighborhood.
Courses to educate them into papers they should be signing and not any
others.
Weapon:Wrapping in cellophane tape like a mummy
Tae Kwon do and Karate
2. Brainstorm ways to make one or more of those places unique:
A. What if…?
B. Take to an extreme.
C. Specific to character or
environment.
D. Shocking or Surprising.
E. Go opposite.
F. What haven’t we seen? -
Matthew Frendo’s Unique Action!
What I learned doing this assignment is how to elevate set pieces to make them more interesting. I learned how to use the environment to a bigger degree and how to elevate characters to make them unique.
In the script, I made the jungle more dangerous with poisonous animals, plants, etc.
I made the end war more old school martial arts (wood weapons, weapons made from nature) vs. modern tech weaponry.
I made the character near-suicidal instead of just remorseful and guilt ridden.
I made the good guy a philanthropist as well who’s family used to own the area until they were ousted.
i changed it from a South American village to the Myanmar region.
i made the protagonist a healer as well as a badass ex-soldier.
I also raised the stakes on certain areas.
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Ramelle Unique Action
What I learned doing this assignment is the story needs more action layers.
Ext:
Cinnamon’s home burned to the ground
Chief Buchanon, Fire Chief Atalah, City Officials, local area News Officials have descended on the property for news of a horrific tragedy of the possible deaths of newly elected DA Johnson
Chief Buchanon: What we got
Fire Official: Not much to go on but there were some secret compartments to the house. Suppose they made it out of the house safely; there is also insurance they can rebuild.
Fire Official 2: Chief, it’s gonna take weeks before we see if there are any bodies.
Chief Atalah: Chief their house had such compartments that we need a couple of days before we can sift through the damages.
Chief Buchanon: I will make a statement that they both are dead, and we elect a new DA.
Chief Atalah: But Chief it’s too soon, they could be alive!!
Chief Buchanon: if she really cares about this job. She would be here; this city has no time for games. Besides, her mother is in jail for the crimes that had been hurting her so maybe this can be a fresh start. Whoever has a problem can deal with it on my level.
Chief Buchanon is going to make a statement to the Press that DA Cinnamon Johnson has perished in a house fire. There will be no memorial unless her mother insists on any efforts. Please, everyone, leave this has been deemed an active crime scene.
Pan to a beautiful island (1) year later
Ext: somewhere in the Bahamas or St. Barts
The beach is a beaming light blue. A beautiful beachfront property is nestled in front of a beautiful home with a brass-colored door. Then pan to the bedroom where we see Clash, yes Clash Stevenson is waking up and he looks beside him and yes Cinnamon is awaking from a deep sleep.
Clash: You ok my sweet wife.
Cinnamon: (she turns and stares at her husband) Yes, and this is doing quite well. (An obvious baby bump)
Clash rubs his wife’s belly and then they talk.
Clash: Honey, we have been wonderful here, but my work is trying to send me back to the states. Plus, the Visas for both of us are about to end. With the baby coming soon we gotta get planted somewhere safe. I say we move to Arizona.
Cinnamon: I must think about my baby and you. I know I have unfinished business in California. It just takes time for me to think this through.
The turn on the telly.
BBC News: And in today’s news. In California, Chay Johnson is said to have fallen ill. The former police detective whose daughter former DA Cinnamon Johnson died in a house fire, but the body was never recovered is said she wants to tell her story before it is too late. Her only surviving family, sister Rebecca, is also said to be in grave health.
Cinnamon begins to cry, then she grabs her stomach, Clash.
Clash: I’m calling the doctor.
Cinnamon: No, let’s leave for Arizona in the morning.
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Tarina’s Unique Action!
“What I learned doing this assignment is…?”
Wow … Wow … Wow this whole process opened so many possibilities to elevate not only scenes but the whole story. It gave me the opportunity to change and elevate parts of the plot, story and characters that were still lacking or did not fit. Loved doing it and think it can be used in any type of script.
Changes:
Environment:
Europe, probably England (London).
Rules:
She are unaware of the code in her head or that the program are already in use or that Krueger knows about the code.
Villain:
Krueger has grown up in a secret lab without a mother and a father that runs his multi million empower with gangs, mafia and shrewdness. He have little compassion for people even his own son. He lives for his science projects and making money and having power. His ultimate goal is to become the most powerful person in the world that will influence politics and economics. That can bring leaders and governments to a fall and move the world like chess pieces. This ends abruptly when Nina’s parents help her escape are killed in the process and can’t finish the global assassination program, the crown jewel in his arsenal of weapons. Nina provides evidence to the government about Krueger’s father that leads to his arrest and incarceration. In the end he dies in prison a bitter man. Krueger comes from this background. He is all that his father were but more cruel, ruthless and he holds Nina accountable for the collapse of his world and the loss of his father. He have taken his father’s empire and build it up even more, but now there are no rules and boundaries… a crazy dysfunctional psychopath with billions of dollars… what can go wrong.
Mission:
Nina have to unlock the code in her brain order to prevent Krueger from further using the global assassination program. She have to do all this while he are actively hunting her down.
Struggle:
She are getting weaker and weaker because of the effect of the code being unlocked in her brain. There are some side effects that her parents who programmed it into her brain were unaware of.
Unique
Skillset:Code locked in her brain.
Meaning:
Each scene pushes her to face her past while unlocking the code and surviving the hunt.
Allies:
The operatives that protected her during the trail are helping her and they have an informant from Krueger helping as well.
Weapon:
Guns, explosives, operatives gear. Global assassination program.
You want to first identify what is already in each of those places. Then, once you’ve got a set of answers, you’ll apply Step 2 to brainstorm ways to elevate one or more places for your Action set pieces.
STEP 2: Use these Strategies for Uniqueness to brainstorm ways to elevate or improve the 9 Places above.
STRATEGIES FOR UNIQUENESS
A. What if…?
Rules: Nina knows from the beginning she have the code. This is her insurance as well as her parent’s way to keep her safe and in case Krueger’s father can finish the program, she can destroy it.
Allies: The operatives are in on the take; they are working with Krueger. In the end they betray her and only she and the informative from Krueger are allies in the end.
B. Take to an extreme.
Weapon: Krueger are not only planning to use the weapon, but he also intends to sell the services of the program to the highest bidder. That means every terrorist and bad guy can now take out a contract and use a civilian to assassinate someone. No one will be safe.
Mission: The government are also hunting her, they found out about the code and the program. They don’t want to destroy it; they want to use it and they need to kill or capture her to prevent her from destroying the program. She doesn’t need to unlock the code. She already have it but now Krueger and the government are hunting her, each for its own purpose.
C. Specific to character or environment.
Environment: What if it is not only playing out in different parts of London, but the lab may also be an underground facility on an obscure island or in an isolated part of the countryside. Under an old ruin…
D. Shocking or Surprising.
Environment: Neo and the team could wipe out the power to the pod fields, thus shutting down the Matrix that way.
Allies: The operatives have a hidden agenda with the government that want to take her in. They don’t know that she have the code in full yet. They have to establish that she have the code and if possible retrieve it from her before she can destroy the program and only then bring her in. Or they bring her in, and she have to escape in order to destroy the program.
E. Go opposite.
Opposite: Nina want revenge on her parents and what have been done to her. She wants to use the program and take over Krueger’s network and money to run a global bad guy assassination program. If you misbehave or get on her list by harming innocent people even governments she will take you out. She want to become the conscience of the leaders and executioner of the thugs and terrorists.
Villain: Krueger have inside connections into the government and are setting several important people up to be assassinated, overthrowing the government and security services so that his team can move in and start running the government.
F. What haven’t we seen?
F. What haven’t we seen?
Maybe this movie should not be about her and having the code in her head, but rather about her time in the lab and how she escaped from it.
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Diana T. Black…Unique Action
What I learned doing this assignment is that any scene can be elevated. There is a need to do this to every scene (elevation) and because this is an Action/Thriller hybrid, I need to ensure that the elements inherent with these genres are present. While I have some scenes that are iconic action and/or thriller scenes, I need more action scenes – not just for the sake of it – they must be meaningful and vital to the story – either offering an insight into Character or moving the story forward…
Scene as originally outlined
A4…Keylan and Robin investigate a warehouse near the party boat mooring – Long Beach Docklands. Viewing the warehouse floor from close to the ceiling… V8…The room houses 28 zippered sleeping bags (hooded) lying on the floor – mesh covers the face – some of the bags move slightly – they’re alive. One rolls slightly off the table and falls on the floor where it barely moves – possibly drugged. A4 (Cont’d) Robin calls in the FBI. They’re taking too long to arrive. He shoots a pipe on the opposite wall of the warehouse – it ricochets off the pipe and hits one of the Asian sex-traffickers in the shoulder – they flee like rats. The FBI arrive and infiltrate the building. The girls are rescued. Keylan and Robin call it a night. Robin agrees to check whether the ransacking of Louise’s apartment was recorded.
New Scene Outline…
A4… (Mission) Keylan and Robin investigate a warehouse near where a party boat is moored at the back end of the Long Beach Docklands. That’s unusual in itself – pleasure boats don’t moor in a heavy industrial zone – not only is it illegal but screams “suspicious” (Environment).. The front of the warehouse is guarded by tough-looking dudes (Villainy). They steal around the back of the building and climb the exterior (Unique Skillset) and find a way to view the warehouse from the ceiling. Keylan films what’s going on below. Robin calls the FBI. (Allies)
V8… (Villainy). The three thugs (masked) inside the warehouse prepares the “the cargo” – 20 young girls all Caucasian – 10 – 18 years, wearing evening wear are tied up and gagged. They struggle against their restraints – terrified, most of them are crying. A thug goes down the line and injects them with the same needle – filling up the syringe as he goes. One of the thugs abuses him for not swapping out the needle. The thug retorts, “Why bother – they’ll be dead within 6 months – STDS, AIDs, drug overdoses etc. As each one is injected they stop struggling and fall unconscious. Each is wrapped in a shroud minus their head and placed in a zippered sleeping bag with a mesh hood. As one of the thugs is about to shroud a young girl, he fingers her first and laughs. The other thug punches him in the face with “Just do your fuckin’ job. They’re not to be touched by scum like you!”
A4 (Cont’d)... (Mission) Keylan wants to kill them then and there. Robin says their job is to apprehend not kill – that’s the purview of the FBI. He and Keylan are not licensed to kill. (Rules)
V8… (Cont’d) (Villainy). The shrouded girls, now unconscious, are placed 4 at a time, on a pallet and strapped down. A forklift enters picks up a pallet of girls and begins to back out, presumably heading towards the boat.
A4 (Cont’d) The FBI still haven’t arrived. Keylan says, “fuck this, give me two minutes, 30 sec then shoot ‘em. We have no idea what they’ve been shot up with.” Robin argues that “the girls are precious cargo, they’ll be okay. “Keylan retorts, “and what if it was your daughter.” (Emotional Struggle) He disappears and climbs back down the exterior wall (Unique Skillset) and hides behind boxes of cargo between the warehouse and the boat .
V8 (Cont’d)…(Villainy). He sees two crew on board – one in the wheelhouse and another on the back deck presumably waiting to receive the “cargo”. As the forklift rounds the corner. The FBI turn up and surround the building just as a shot if fired inside the warehouse. Robin has fired a bullet (Weapon & Unique Skillset – he’s a sharp shooter) into a metal pipe on the opposite wall of the warehouse – it ricochets off the pipe and hits one of the sex-traffickers in the shoulder – the thugs try to flee but Robin picks off two of them – shooting them in the legs (Unique Skillset – he’s a sharp shooter) before the FBI infiltrates the building
At the same time – the forklift driver makes a run for it. Keylan waylays and decks him out cold. Keylan runs over to the boat – it’s still tied to the wharf – with no one to release the mooring. The skipper guns the boat, straining against the moorings. The crewmember on the back deck is forced at gunpoint by the skipper, to go down the gangplank and release the mooring. As he approaches the tie-up Keylan throws a metal pipe – it hits him in the head (Unique Skillset – excellent Aim). Keylan dodges behind cargo boxes to avoid getting shot at by the skipper. (Struggle). The skipper disappears. The sound of a boat on the other side of the party boat – moving off – the skipper has escaped. (Meaning… this alerts Dominic that Keylan is one of the people investigating the crime syndicate – Dominic must get rid of Keylan somehow)
As the FBI and the ambulances drive off Robin agrees to check whether the ransacking of Louise’s apartment was recorded.
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Christopher Dalbey’s Unique Action!
What I learned doing this assignment is that building on the unique action really adds to the uniqueness of the story and character intrigue. I truly like this exercise because it made me raise the bar with almost everything apart or associated with the story.
ENVIRONMENT: Having the story take place both in the political realm and in the sub world of voodoo and mythology in New Orleans makes for a great dichotomy. By also adding the environment of the transitional world of voodoo deities and the party world of Mardi Gras allows more room for mystery and intrigue.
RULES: Those that are abided by in the political world and those introduced in the underworld of demons and gods.
VILLAIN; The villain balances back-and-forth with feelings towards the protagonist because he is inevitably Maman Phara’s counterpart as Kalfu in the underground. It’s the classic enemies who are bound to be together.
MISSION: To seek justice and vengeance against her wrongdoers as voodoo incarnate Maman Phara.
STRUGGLE: For Ady to come to terms that she is dead and is reincarnated as a voodoo deity and learn of her newfound powers!
UNIQUE SKILL SET: Her background in MMA adds to her supernatural powers and abilities to kiss some serious corrupt political circles and the seedy underground that stole her mortal life.
MEANING: Finding her true purpose in the afterlife and embracing what she has abandoned for a future in politics – her family ties to voodoo.
ALLIES: Ady’s abandoned voodoo family and the few members of Triano’s party that turn on him to help Ady.
WEAPON: supernatural powers to fight and defend herself against the evils of Kalfu and and Triano’s underground regime.
WHAT IF … A good politician, with a good agenda, gets caught up with the dark side of politics in New Orleans and comes back from the dead to seek justice as voodoo deity Maman Brigitte.
TAKE IT TO AN EXTREME: The feuds and politics of New Orleans turns into an underground war in New Orleans of voodoo myths and deities.
SPECIFIC TO CHARACTER OR ENVIRONMENT: Maman Brigitte versus her counterpart in the underground world, Kalfu.
SHOCKING OR SURPRISING: Maman Brigitte and Kalfu are meant to be together.
GO OPPOSITE: As voodoo deity Kalfu, he attempts to join sides with Maman without her knowing it.
WHAT HAVEN’T WE SEEN: Politicians fighting each other as voodoo deities and counterparts.
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