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Week 2 Day 4 – What I learned …
Posted by cheryl croasmun on January 16, 2023 at 7:20 amWhat I learned …
Huey Williams replied 2 years, 1 month ago 3 Members · 2 Replies -
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WHAT I LEARNED REWRITING MY SCENE:
– Re SPIDERMAN, it’s best to show not tell when revealing character. I reveal various things about my characters in various parts of the script and it’s mainly show. However, when it is “tell,” like backstory wound, I strive to make it dramatic, like in anger or some other emotion.
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Week 2 Day 4: Character Reveal – SPIDERMAN
What Makes The Scene Great?
Young PETER PARKER is bitten by a rare spider, suddenly finds himself with
special spider like powers, it all starts when he saves the GIRL of his
dreams from a nasty fall. Peter spins web which catches a plate of food
and lands on the back of a BULLY, which ends in a fight in the hallway.
ALL STUDENTS watch in surprise as Peter display more special powers, as he
side step punches, then punches Bully across the floor. Both scenses are
great, they demand that he take action, as well as being creative, lots of
subtext very good action sequences.
THE PITCH: Young JERRY STRANG while at the zoo, teases a Monkey with a banana,
angering it until he bites his finger, strange things begin to happen.
TITLE: “MONKEY BEHAVIOR”
GENRE: COMEDY
FADE IN:
EXT. LOCAL ZOO – AFTERNOON
JERRY STRANG stands outside a Monkey Cage teasing a LARGE MONKEY with a banana,
finally he gets a bite on his finger, he jumps around in pain, and the Big
Monkey starts laughing while he eats the banana.
Jerry Strang and the Big Monkey part ways giving each other the middle finger…
INT. THE STRANG HOUSE – NIGHT
Jerry lies in bed having a very unrestful sleep, he’s dreaming, a night mare…
DISSOLVE:
He’s a big monkey desperately swinging and leaping from tree branch to tree
branch being chased by a hungry LEOPARD thats getting closer with every branch.
The Leopard makes a desperate leap and almost captures Jerry, but a last minute
move allows him to escape as he falls in the water below…
CUT TO – A super imposed view of the Monkey at the zoo laughing at him out loud!
Jerry wakes up in a cold sweat and in shock.
JERRY STRANG
What’s happening to me?
Jerry jumps out of bed and runs to the nearest mirror to see if is face is still
there, then he gets dressed…
EXT. A BUSY STREET NEAR A PARK – AFTERNOON
Jerry walks along the street near a park where there are DOG WALKERS, one of the
dogs smells him and starts barking at him, several of the other dogs catch his
sent, suddenley they all start chaseing him down the street barking, he ducks into
a building.
JERRY STRANG
What the heck, what’s going on?
CUT TO – A super imposed view of the Monkey at the zoo laughing at him out loud!
The dogs finally leave the building and Jerry Head for his job.
INT. BOB’S MECHANICS SHOP – AFTERNOON
Jerry enters the machanics shop where he works and is greeted by his BOSS ARNOLD.
BOSS ARNOLD
You’re five minutes late, what’s your excuse?
JERRY STRANG
Oh, I had to help an old Lady accross the street.
Boss Arnold just looks at Jerry and doesn’t say anything.
BOSS ARNOLD
OK, there’s a car on the rack that needs an oil
change, take care of it.
Jerry goes to the car and begins the oil change.
LUNCH TIME:
Jerry sits in a comfortable spot near the engine lift eating his lunch, he dozes
off and sometime in his sleep he has a position change.
Boss Arnold walks up from his office to find Jerry hanging upside down
from the motor hoist, he stands there stairing.
BOSS ARNOLD
Jerry!
Jerry falls to the floor and wakes up and gets to his feet.
JERRY STRANG
Sorry Boss, I dozed off for a bit.
BOSS ARNOLD
Things are a little slow today, take the rest
of the day off, come back in the morning, and
take care of that bump on your head.
JERRY STRANG
Sure thing Boss.
Boss Arnold watches Jerry closely as he heads out of the shop.
INT. THE STRANG HOUSE – EVENING
Jerry sits in his room thinking about his condition.
JERRY STRANG
The dreams, the dog chase, what happened at
work, it’s all connected to the monkey at the
zoo, it has tobe.
EXT. LOCAL ZOO – AFTERNOON
Jerry approaches the Monkey with a platter of fruits, presents it to the
Monkey. And after helping himself to the fruit he shakes hands with Jerry,
they are now friends and his powers, gone…
END
FADE OUT
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