
Alfred Travis
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Alfred Travis’s Interest Scene
What I learned doing this assignment is… ? Explore!
Logline: Beau returns to his brother Lefty. Bo feigns peace, no hard feelings, but he really wants Lefty to reveal his secret that his mother did not give birth to Beau.
Interest Technique Ideas:
Structural: Intrigue, Mystery, Something Unseen.
Character: Uncomfortable Moment
Dialogue: Hook
INT. LEFTY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
Lefty pours drinks of Brandy.
LEFTY
We good?
BEAU
Should we not be good?
LEFTY
It’s been awhile.
BEAU
I know.
Beau picks up the drink, takes a sip.
LEFTY
What have you been doing? Working?
BEAU
I’ve been thinking about us. Family.
LEFTY
That’s good.
Lefty takes a drink.
BEAU
I know you know.
LEFTY
That’s past. We’re brothers.
BEAU
The same right?
Beau sips his drink.
BEAU
Tell me. I know you know.
LEFTY
Right. There’s nothing for me to say.
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Alfred Travis Reveals
Logline: Jack Berres, owner of the Art Space Bo rents, pays a late night visit to Bo. He reveals to Bo his awareness of Bo’s entire life.
What do I want to hide from the reader for dramatic effect? Bo’s fears and avoidance of conflict and that he’s an adult runaway from his family.
What are the characters hiding from each other? Bo is hiding his fears and that he’s living at the Art Space. Jack is hiding his awareness of Bo’s situation/circumstances.
What is already known that would be more dramatic if hidden, then revealed? Bo’s significant music project.
What would be the best/worst/most dramatic thing that could be revealed at this point? Jack’s awareness of Bo’s entire life and Bo’s suppression because of fear.
Knowing this story what could be under the surface that would create more drama for my character’s? The unreported history of Bo experiencing domestic violence/abuse and a political terror.
Are there any deeper meanings to the things my characters are saying and doing? Shame, domestic violence, domestic abuse.
Demand: Jack demands Bo to open up to him.
Cover-up: Bo unwilling to name his truth.
Reveal: Jack assures Bo he is safe.
INT. BLUE COMPOSER ROOM – LATE NIGHT
Bo sits at his piano. Pencil in hand.
Jack is at the window. He turns around, comes to Bo.
JACK
Something I want you to know.
BO
What is it?
JACK
I know your music project.
Bo touches, plays a sequence of notes on the piano.
BO
The music of the spheres.
JACK
And what that means.
Beat of silence.
JACK
I saw you on the streets of South Minneapolis. You were a child. Homeless.
BO
I was?
JACK
I know how you feel about your family.
Silence.
JACK
I don’t believe your family is your family.
BO
They bother me. I….
JACK
You ran away.
Bo is silent.
JACK
You’re safe here, Bo. Just be upfront with me. You can talk to me.
BO
Its hard. I feel something is wrong, but I don’t know what it is.
JACK
What do you feel is wrong?
BO
Family. They’re so hostile.
JACK
It’s domestic violence and abuse. You survived kidnap and murder.
BO
That’s it?
JACK
You want to express it through music. That’s why the music spoke to you.
Bo plays some NOTES on the piano.
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Alfred Travis Character Relationships
What I Learned doing this assignment was…? How to view my character relationships to get to the story I need to tell.
1.
Bo Travis
Traits: Depressed, Ashamed
Karen
Traits: Plotting, Deceptive, Sullen, Self-Righteousness
Jack Berres
Traits: Insightful, Caring, Friendly, smart
Janey
Sexually Promiscuous, Desirable, Creative, Intelligent
2.
Bo/Karen: Bo’s feeling wronged/Karen self-righteous
Bo/Janey: Bo ashamed/Janey Inviting
Bo/Jack: Bo is depressed/Jack Caring
3.
Bo has rapport with Jack and Janey. They give Bo a new lease on life. With Karen Bo has a conflict he doesn’t want in contrast with K who’s competing for Bo’s goal.
4.
Bo is inspired with Jack. Jack is supportive. With Karen give Bo the trait of being strong, not a victim of what he doesn’t know.
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Title: Alfred Travis Max Interest 2
What I’ve learned… Good craft
LOGLINE: KAREN, a girl Bo dated senior year college, catches up with Bo three years later.
ESSENCE: Karen feigns nice, a good friend to Bo for her robbery plot.
EXT. BUTLER NORTH BUILDING – DAY
As Bo exits his Art Space building KAREN calls out to him.
KAREN
Bo?
Bo turns and sees Karen. Something about her.
KAREN
Been awhile. What are you up to?
Bo is silent a moment.
BO
I’m renting an Art Space here.
He points to the Butler North Building.
KAREN
Let me guess – Music Composer, right?
BO
How did you know/
KAREN
I’m in the business to know.
BO
I have to go.
Karen points to her next door building.
KAREN
I’m in the Public Relations business. Come see me.
BO
Come see you?
KAREN
Yes.
BO
We’ll see.
Bo cuts across the street.
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Alfred Travis’s Challenging Situations
What I learned that is improving my writing is…? Take a good look at the situations of my characters.
SCENE 1 INT. BEDROOM – DAY
A. Current Scene Logline: BO, depressed, in bed in the middle of the day, pondering nothing, when his younger brother, CURTIS, shames him in front of his visitor, MARY.
B. Essence: What’s it going to take to get Bo up and engaged with his life?
C. Brainstorm: Show the depth of Bo’s troubled family relationship
D. Summary: Make the scene clear about family tension.
SCENE 2 INT. BEDROOM – DAY
New Logline: Bo expresses himself to Curtis’s hostility.
B. Essence: Bo stands up to wrong, abuse.
C. Brainstorm….
D. Summary….
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Alfred Travis’s Full-Out Characters
“What I’ve Learned that is improving my writing is…?” To push beyond to get the thinking about my story vision/purpose and characters.
CURRENT PROFILES
BO
Description: 25 year old black male who wants to be a music composer.
Core Traits: Depressed, Ashamed, listless, feels unworthy.
Subtext: Bo is fearful to express his truth.
KAREN
Description: She’s a Swedish blonde, cut-throat PR Representative
Core Traits: Self-important, deceptive, sullen, sad, racist.
Subtext: Karen is neurotically obsessed with Bo.
JACK
Description: Elderly Real Estate Restorer.
Core Traits: Perceptive, sharp, effeminate, expert, fashionable.
Subtext: Secretly aware of Bo’s life.
REVISED PROFILES
BO
Description: A down on his luck wanna be Music Composer.
Core Traits: Depressed, Ashamed, feels defective and unworthy.
Subtext: Doesn’t stand up for himself or speak his truth, his heart.
KAREN
Description: Swedish blonde, cut-throat PR rep.
Subtext: Obsessed for Bo to “see” her.
JACK
Elderly Real Estate Business man.
Core Traits: Spiritual, a seer, expert.
Subtext: Plans for Bo’s conversion.
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Edward –
These type of stories have interest as they describe the War on Terror since 9/11. I tried to grasp the skills we are working with. I think it is in the subtext. I was able to read your scene.
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Logline: JOHN and NICK face-off over vital info to launch a website worth millions.
Essence: Characters accuse each over the possession of vital info.
INT. OFFICE – DAY
JOHN, a distrustful loner, works furiously at his desk, waiting impatiently for data on his computer.
JOHN
Come on!
Moments before final input NICK enters.
NICK
I knew you’re distrustful!
JOHN
No! You tried to connive your way into my business.
NICK
I gave you the data you wanted.
JOHN
For a price.
NICK
God, man, where’s your loyalty?!
John pops a disk out of the computer.
NICK
Good luck with that.
They stare each other down.
JOHN
You didn’t.
NICK
That information is worthless!
John re-checks the computer.
JOHN
Worthless?
NICK
I know you. You’re not to be trusted.
John puts the disk back into the computer.
ACCESS DENIED.
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Alfred QE Scene
INT. CLUB – NIGHT
A kind of stylish club. A stock company EMPLOYEES celebrate. A stellar performance for X-Corporation.
CEO ROBERT UNCORKS a bottle of champagne.
ROBERT
To X-Corporation!
APPLAUSE!
A secretive look marks Robert’s mood as he sees TRENT, who shoots a conspiring, aggressive eye toward Robert.
Trent approaches Robert.
TRENT
I know you did it.
Robert takes a self-esteem boosting drink.
Trent
You used me.
Robert
What are you talking about?
TRENT
Let’s talk.
They leave the celebration
INT. BACKROOM – NIGHT
TRENT
Tell me the secret?
ROBERT(smooth)
I know what I’m doing –
Trent punches Robert with a blow to his face….
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Alfred Travis Interest Techniques
“What I’ve Learned that is improving my writing is…?”
I learned how to think of my scenes in a more interesting way to capture the essence of the scene.
Screenplay: The Black and Blue Room
Logline: Bo, in the throes of depression and shame, seeks confirmation that he had a miracle experience with music in junior high school.
Essence of the Scene: Bo’s Junior high school Principal, MR. MARTIN, gives Bo his miracle music-notes, confirming Bo’s experience.
Scene:
EXT. FOLWELL CATHOLIC JR. HIGH SCHOOL – DAY
A large half a block building. It looks like a haunted, mystery school.
INT. FOLWELL CATHOLIC JR. HIGH SCHOOL – DAY
School is yet in session. MR. GEORGE MARTIN, a youthful 30s, head of curly black hair, the PRINCIPAL HEADMASTER, playful in a serious way. He, like the spirit of something Supernatural, is in the front hallway when Bo enters.
Mr. Martin tosses a prodigious bundle of note-cards to Bo, who makes the esoteric catch.
MR. MARTIN
I’m George Martin. The Music Producer of The Beatles.
BO
I remember. You taught me the Music of the Spheres.
Bo clutches the note-cards in hand.
Bo
I’m going to compose these note-cards.
MR. MARTIN
if you do that you’ll manifest the meaning of Pythagoras’s Universal music theory.
BO
It’ll be a miracle!
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Alfred Travis Profiles People
“What I’ve Learned that is improving my writing is…?” Understanding the extremes of my characters.
Person 1: I dislike Person 1. 4 Core Traits: Religious, Hedonistic, Fatherly, Critical. In a Prayer Room at church Person 1 entered and without knowing me was openly critical of me. He was mean, critically mean.
Person 2: I like Person 1. 4 Core Traits: Somewhat unfriendly, probing, mysterious, judgmental. In October 1998 Person 1 approached me outside of my apartment building. He was somewhat unfriendly, probing my life with a mysterious tone like judgmental of my life.
Person 3. 4 Core Traits: Excellence, sermonizing, unsupportive, unbeliever. In the second semester of the Cinema Production program, class, Writing The Short Script, Person 3 demanded excellence of me without support, or instruction, and concluded the meeting with a “sermon,” calling me “pretentious” and that he was an unbeliever.
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Alfred Travis Profiles People
“What I’ve Learned That is Improving my writing is…?” A grasp of traits of character, including Extreme Character Traits
Person 1: 4 Traits: Religious, Hedonistic, Fatherly, Critical.
Person 2: 4 Traits: Affable, Conversational, Caring, Mysterious.
Person 3: 4 Traits: Unsupportive, Incorrect, Agnostic, Wrong.
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Alfred Travis Puts Essence To Work
“What I’ve Learned is…?” Think about my story essence
Script I Choose: The Black and Blue Room
Scene 1 Location: Opening Scene
Logline: Bo Travis, the day has started but Bo, dressed, is in bed, depressed, listless, idle, no objective for life.
Essence: Bo needs occupation.
New Logline: Bo, moved by his friend, Mary, seeks to become a music composer.
Scene 2 Location: Page 10. The Inciting Incident
Logline: Bo buys a special music composer book.
Essence: Discovery of a special song contest.
New Logline: Bo finds opportunity.
Scene 3 Location: Page 30. First Act Break. 1st Turning Point
Logline: Bo is attracted to Janey.
Essence: Bo is heightened into his project meeting Janey.
New Logline: Bo’s call to life, music and love.
Scene 4 Location: Page 60. Midpoint
Logline: Bo meets with some friends.
Essence: Bo connecting with others.
New Logline: Bo, connecting with others, experiences joy.
Scene 5 Location: Page 88. The Big Gloom.
Logline: Bo, robbed of his music project, busks.
Essence: The music keeps Bo lifted up and hopeful.
New Logline: Though music is lost, Bo and his music dream goes on.
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Alfred Travis Finds The Essence
Script I Choose: Undiscovered
I have been searching for this script to buy, but it is not available. It is the only movie that influences me!
I can’t do the assignment on any script. So I’ll have to move on to the next assignment as the script I choose I haven’t been able to find a copy.
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Hello! My name is Alfred Travis. I have written three feature scripts and two short scripts. Recently I learned that one of my spiritual gifts includes Creative Communication. I hope to get out of this class creative mastery – mastery of my gift. I’m an Earth and Water body. A unique detail!
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Alfred Travis
I agree to the terms of this release form.
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“What I learned doing this assignment is…?” There’s a good reward for hard work. Excellent work!
Alfred Travis Character Profile
Logline: A man explores his memory loss and faith.
Role:
Protagonist: Bo. Traits: Loner. Down on self. Soft spoken.
Bo’s subtext logline: Believe….???
Antagonist: Karen. Traits: Self-righteous. Defensive.
Optional:
Bo doesn’t want to admit about himself: mentally ill, living on Social Security and in public housing.
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“What I learned doing this assignment is…?” What happens with my character in these story beats.
Alfred Travis Story Beats
Logline: A man explores his memory loss and faith.
Story Beats:
1. EXT. ELLIOT TWIN HIGH-RISE TOWERS – COURT-YARD – DAY
BO re-meets PASTOR KENNY, but retains no memory of him.
2. INT. ELLIOT TWIN COMMUNITY ROOM – DAY
Bo meets his neighbor, KATE, a Julliard trained pianist.
3. INT. BO’S APARTMENT 708 – NIGHT
Bo takes his mental illness medicine, sleeps.
4. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – DAY
Bo in park????
5. EXT. ELLIOT TWIN HIGH-RISE – COURTYARD – NIGHT
Bo star gazing.
6. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – DAY
Bo restless….
7. INT. ELLIOT TWIN – BACK HALLWAY – DAY
Bo receives a letter of which he has no memory of its contents.
8. EXT. BUTLER NORTH BUILDING – DAY
Outside Art Space.
9. INT. BUTLER NORTH BUILDING – HALLWAY – DAY
Maintenance MIKE unlocks Art Space.
10. INT. ART SPACE 708 – DAY
Bo recognizes Mike, but not the Art Space. Though he experiences a flashback.
11. INT. BLACK ROOM – DAY
Mike gives Bo his forgotten Music Compositions.
12. INT. HENNEPIN COUNTY MEDICAL CENTER – PSYCHIATRIST OFFICE – DAY
Bo talks to his psychiatrist, DR. ORBUCH, about memory loss. Dr. Orbuch sets Bo up with a Memory Care Specialist.
13. INT. ELLIOT TWIN COMMUNITY ROOM – DAY
Bo tells Kate he will do a lyric analysis of his music compositions to help recover his memory.
14. INT. SCHMITT MUSIC STORE – DAY
Bo buys a music journal.
15. INT. BARNES AND NOBLE BOOKSELLER – DAY
Bo purchases an Oxford English Dictionary (OED) and a Thesaurus.
16. EXT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – DAY
Est. shot on cross on top of the church.
17. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NARTHEX – DAY
Bo hesitates to enter Mass.
18. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NAVE – DAY
Bo attends Mass.
19. EXT. UNIVERSITY OF ST. THOMAS – DAY
Est. shot.
20. INT. UST – LOBBY – DAY
Bo looks at Fresco art.
21. OFFICE 214 – DAY
Bo signs up for an Art History class.
22. INT. UST – LOBBY – SECURITY COMMAND DESK – DAY
Bo gets his student ID.
23. INT. UST – CAFETERIA – DAY
Bo finds a flyer: Composers perform works Spring Semester at UST Chapel of St. Thomas Aquinas.
24. INT. UST – BOOKSTORE – DAY
Bo buys a Catechism.
25. INT. UST – CAFETERIA – NIGHT
Bo analyzes music compositions, “The Making Of…”
26. EXT. DAYTON’S DEPARTMENT STORE – NIGHT
Holiday window display: “How the Grinch Stole Christmas!”
27. INT. BO’S 708 APARTMENT – NIGHT
Music scene: “Silent Night.”
28. INT. ET CR – DAY
Kate plays piano as Bo listens.
29. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NAVE – DAY
WOMAN enters Confessional.
30. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NARTHEX – DAY
Bo talks with Pastor Kenny.
31. INT. ET CR – DAY
Bo discusses Pastor Kenny with Kate.
32. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – NIGHT
Bo star gazes.
33. INT. ET CR – DAY
Bo analyzes music composition, “Let Me Be The One.”
34. INT. BO’S 708 APARTMENT – NIGHT
Bo analyzes music composition, “S-T-O(Stop).”
35. INT. ET CR – DAY
Bo can’t play his music composition, “S-T-O(Stop).”
End Act I
Begin Act II
36. INT. UST – CLASSROOM – DAY
Art History class.
37. INT. HCMC EXAMINATION ROOM – DAY
Bo undergoes memory tests.
38. INT. MEMORY CARE SPECIALIST OFFICE – DAY
DR. HANNAH confirms results of tests: no abnormalities.
39. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – DAY
Flashback to Art Space.
40. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – DAY
WOMAN crosses herself.
41. INT. DUNN BROTHERS COFFEE SHOP – DAY
Bo discusses Art Space clue.
42. INT. JACK’S OFFICE – DAY
Security Manager, JACK MORTENSON, informs Bo of a 1984 robbery of his music compositions.
43. INT. BUTLER SQUARE – DAY
Business Office Directory search.
44. INT. ET CR – DAY
Bo encounters a disturbed Kate.
45. INT. BO’S 708 APARTMENT – NIGHT
Bo struggles with prayer.
46. INT. UST – COMPUTER LAB – DAY
Bo runs a search on Karen.
47. INT. POWDERHORN PARK APARTMENT – HALLWAY – DAY
Wrong Karen Knepper.
48. INT. THE MARQUETTE APARTMENTS – HALLWAY – DAY
Wrong Karen.
49. INT. DEAN PARKWAY APARTMENT – HALLWAY – DAY
Real Karen, but she refuses to see Bo.
50. INT. ET CR – DAY
PK provides Bo with books to aid memory.
51. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
Kate calls Bo “Satan!”
52. INT. UST CAFETERIA – NIGHT
Bo makes a friend, JANEY.
53. INT. BO’S APARTMENT – NIGHT
Bo analyzes music composition, “The Making Of…”
54. INT. ET CR – NIGHT
Bo dances with Kate.
55. INT. MEMORY CARE SPECIALIST OFFICE – DAY
Dr. H. and Bo discuss trauma.
56. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NAVE – DAY
Bo struggles with prayer.
57. INT. PASTOR KENNY’S OFFICE – DAY
Bo and PK talk about Bo at Jr. Hi School.
58. EXT. FOLWELL CATHOLIC JR. HI. SCHOOL – DAY
Est. shot.
59. INT. FOLWELL CATHOLIC JR. HI SCHOOL – PRINCIPALS’S OFFICE – DAY
Bo re-meets GEORGE MARTIN.
60. INT. UST – LOBBY – DAY
Bo shares a Bible verse with Janey.
61. INT. BO’S 708 APARTMENT – NIGHT
Bo analyzes lyrics of music composition, “The Making Of…”
62. INT. ET CR – DAY
Kate’s birthday celebration!
63. INT. BO’S 708 APARTMENT – DAY
Bo analyzes music composition, “The Black and Blue Room.”
64. INT. HCMC – PSYCHIATRISTS OFFICE – DAY
Bo informs Dr. Orbuch he’s off meds.
End Act II
(Begin Act III)
65. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – DAY
A dove comes to Bo.
66. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NAVE – DAY
Bo prays!
67. INT. ET CR – NIGHT
Bo BANGS on the piano keys!
68. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – NAVE – DAY
Bo completes his prayer.
69. EXT. ET HR – COURTYARD – NIGHT
Bo stands alone.
70. INT. UST – LOBBY – DAY
Bo learns he write a good Art History essay.
71. INT. ET CR – DAY
Bo analyzes music compositions.
72. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – NIGHT
Bo and Kate together.
73. INT. MEMORY CARE SPECIALIST OFFICE – DAY
Dr. H. continues Bo’s memory therapy.
74. INT. DUNNS BROTHERS COFFEESHOP – DAY
Kate discusses her life with Bo.
75. INT. ET CR – NIGHT
Bo hears the voice of Jesus speak: “Believe in Me.”
76. INT. UST – ATRIUM – NIGHT
Bo fantasizes a date with Kate.
77. INT. MEMORY CARE SPECIALISTS OFFICE – DAY
Dr. H. discusses Karen with Bo.
78. INT. UST – HALLWAY – NIGHT
Fresco lecture.
79. INT. UST – HALLWAY – NIGHT
Bo finds MUSICIANS note.
80. INT. UST CHAPEL – NARTHEX – DAY
Musician ERIC agrees to perform Bo’s music composition, “The Making Of…”
81. INT. PASTOR KENNY’S OFFICE – DAY
Bo tells PK he heard Jesus’ voice.
*82. INT. UST – COMPUTER LAB – DAY
Bo gets a picture of Karen at SCSU Alumni page.
83. INT. ET CR – NIGHT
Bo analyzes music compositions.
84. EXT. IDS CENTER – DAY
Bo finds Karen’s office building.
85. INT. THE WELLS GROUP PR OFFICE – DAY
Bo finds Karen!
86. INT. KAREN’S OFFICE – DAY
Karen in her office.
87. INT. ART SPACE – DAY
Karen’s robbery.
88. INT. KAREN’S OFFICE – DAY
Heated conversation between Bo and Karen.
89. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – DAY
Bo suffers a heart attack.
90. INT. HCMC – EMERGENCY ROOM – DAY
Bo examined for a heart attack.
91. INT. HCMC – INTENSIVE CARE PSYCHIATRY WARD – DAY
Bo is observed for suicide.
92. INT. LOUNGE – DAY
Bo receives meds.
93. INT. ASCENSION CATHOLIC CHURCH – DAY
Sacrament of Reconciliation.
94. INT. UST CHAPEL OF ST. THOMAS AQUINAS – NIGHT
Eric doesn’t show. Bo plays on piano his music composition, “The Making Of…”
95. INT. NAVE – NIGHT
Bo talks with Karen.
96. EXT. ELLIOT PARK – NIGHT
A Star falls to earth before Bo.
(End Act III)
The End.
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Alfred Travis
MemberApril 21, 2021 at 12:41 am in reply to: Confidentiality Agreement – Professional Rewrite 71Alfred Travis. I agree to the terms of this release form.
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“What I’ve learned doing this assignment is…?” My screenplay, “Believe in Me” is, potentially, structurally sound. Need to feel where the crisis point is, though.
Main Conflict: Man vs himself: Bo, a paranoid schizophrenia, disability patient, discovers he has amnesia about his faith and 80s Music Composer Art Space.
9-Point Structure:
1. Opening: PASTOR KENNY, (40), re-introduces himself to BO, (40), after 25 years, but Bo doesn’t remember.
2. Inciting Incident: Bo finds he also has no memory of his music composer Art Space and music compositions from the 80s.
3. Page 10 – movie about: Bo’s lyric analysis project to recover his memory.
4. 1st Turning Point: Bo struggles to play on piano his music compositions.
5. Midpoint: Pastor Kenny provides Bo with books on the Catholic Mass and Sacrament of Reconciliation and Catholic Initiation to help Bo recovery his memory.
6. 2d Turning Point: Bo gives up on his medicine treatment.
7. Crisis: ???? Bo down on himself??? (at what page is the crisis?)
8. Climax: Bo and KAREN, (41), have an altercation.
9. Resolution: Bo performs his music composition, “The Making Of…” at the University of St. Thomas Chapel of Saint Thomas Aquinas.
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Jackie,
I can relate with your logline. Can you make it a sentence??
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Alfred Travis Logline and One Page!
“What I learned doing this Assignment is…?” I learned how to think about the logline and one page.
Title: Believe in Me
Logline #1(note: This is the logline I wrote for my screenplay that won favorable coverage of “Consider,” i.e., the analyst at We Screenplay did not tell me to rewrite my logline!): A man explores memory loss and faith.
Logline#2: A man discovers he has memory loss and seeks to recover his memory through the reconciliation of his faith.
One Page:
A pastor, KENNY, remembers, BO, a disability patient, and Bo realizes he has memory loss, not only of his friendship with Pastor Kenny, but his faith and music compositions as well. Bo undertakes a project to analyze his found music compositions, and is helped by his neighbor, KATE, a beautiful woman in her 50s who like Bo is schizophrenic. She’s a Juilliard trained pianist.
When Bo learns he was robbed in 1984 of his music compositions he seeks to find the robber, KAREN, a girl he dated in college.
Under the weight of Karen’s revelation that Bo did her wrong, Bo suffers a heart attack. Bo recovers and is observed in the Psychiatry ward and comes to now being able to confess his sins at Sacrament of Reconciliation.
Following penance Bo performs his music composition, “The Making Of…” at the Chapel of Saint Thomas Aquinas and reconciles with Karen.
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My name is Alfred Travis
I’ve written three scripts.
I hope to gain professional rewrite skills and improve my screenplay(s).
Unique… strange…: I was born a baby miracle on the Mexico island, Isla De Guadalupe in August 1949.
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Hi, my name is Alfred Travis. I’m a 4th semester senior at Maharishi International University, the David Lynch Masters in Fine Arts (MFA) Screenwriting program. This is my thesis screenplay semester. And this week I start the rewrite of my screenplay at the same time of the beginning of the Professional Rewrite 71 course. Synchronicity!