[Alyssa Giannola]

What I learned from doing this assignment…is the power of brainstorming and being fully free to adjust and dismiss and restart from scratch. Too often I get stuck on an idea and then it causes problems down the road because it’s hard to be flexible, so I’m looking forward to powering through and keeping the momentum while I tweak and elevate this seed concept.

Concept: In Victorian London, a bodyguard with supernatural powers must protect a secret society member’s son from demonic assassins or the entire city will be destroyed.

Hero: A supernaturally powerful bodyguard who is an angel in disguise

Demand for Action: If the son dies before the secret society’s vital meeting, the city will be invaded by demonic creatures.

Mission: Protect the son from the enemy and keep him alive

Antagonist: The demonic king of London

Escalating Action: From people to supernatural creatures to demons

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Giannola

I agree to the terms of this release form.

…

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi everyone! My name is Alyssa Giannola and I’ve written 3 feature scripts so far. I’m a big fan of action movies and I have a few action concepts that I’d love to elevate, so I’m excited about what we will learn in this class. Something unique: I just started writing my first fantasy novel!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Finished Act 4!

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

This was challenging at times but I appreciate the high speed writing rules and it clicked eventually, although I did go a little off book with some scenes- however, I still hit all the same turning points and major scenes in my outline so overall I’m happy although it’s shorter than I’d like and there a plenty of gaps to be filled out. Excited to make it better in the next module!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Continues Act 4

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

I technically finished my first draft but it’s more like 15% quality than 30% so I am going back through and adjusting some things, filling in the gaps, etc. to get it to the 30% mark and ready for the next module. But despite some hangups and a few stall-outs, I do feel like I’m getting the hang of high speed writing overall!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Villain Has a Great Plan!

What I learned: The villain’s plan is the engine that helps drive the story, which I didn’t fully recognize before, so I’m excited to refine my villain’s plan and make it stronger as we go along. Definitely still a work in progress, but it’s been fun approaching the story this way!

1. What is the end goal:

To kill Cobra and retrieve the stolen data about Lintz’s corruption before it’s decrypted and shared. <div>

2. How can the Villain accomplish that in a devious way: Lintz knows Ace is the only one who can find Cobra and anything he might hide, but Ace will only look for him if the world is literally ending. So Lintz starts bombing cities and spreading the word that Cobra’s behind it, causing agents around the world to start searching for him- including Ace.

3. How can they cover it up:

Lintz plants Cobra’s name as architect of the bombings, acts as a friend/father figure but manipulates Ace and her natural distrust of others to do what he wants, sends Ace to help the CIA pretending to be a team player, leaks rumors about Cobra’s rogue deeds and betrayals (some true), guides everyone to follow leads he plants to help him win without them knowing it.

4. Sequence it to make it as intriguing as possible (still working on this part/plot):

• Lintz has spent years making Ace believe he is the only one she can trust
• Lintz uses a rogue team of terrorists to plant bombs in various cities, the first city to blow is where Ace is already working a mission.
• Lintz plants Cobra’s name in connection to the bombings.
• Lintz leaks that Ace works for his shadow org, so the CIA (which he needs in play) requests her back to help them find Cobra.
• Lintz continues to create rumors about Cobra’s rogue deeds and manipulates all the world’s agencies to believe it, including Ace, getting everyone mobilized to find Cobra.
• Lintz manipulates Ace to believe she can’t trust her new partner, Bryson, to get her to she go solo and keep things from the CIA (only telling Lintz)
• When she finds Cobra, Lintz’s voice is in her head making her distrust what Cobra tells her.
• When Ace starts to work with Cobra and Bryson, Lintz turns the other agencies against her and Bryson as Cobra’s accomplices, pinning things on the CIA and putting them all in more danger.
• When Ace faces Lintz, he still thinks he can manipulate her (to destroy the data? Kill Cobra and Bryson? Not expose him? I’m not sure about the climax yet) and she has to use the help of others (overcoming her flaw) to defeat/expose him.

</div>

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Started Act 4

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

Pushing into act four, which is the shortest act in my outline- I only have a few scenes and the main scene is quite long with a lot that happens in one location. As I fill it out, I may have to change the location once or move people around enough that it doesn’t get stagnant. But that’s a problem for the next draft! Speeding through for now.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Finishes Act 3

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

Speed-running this draft to honor the outline, then I will go back and make some changes to my outline and fill in a few of the gaps that I’m leaving behind. Definitely leaving more gaps than I’d like, but I do feel like I’m grasping the high-speed rules! Moving on to act 4 and the finish line (for now).

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Continuing Act 3

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

I was running into a few core problems with the serum/bands so I have brainstormed an alternate that is similar but requires a few tweaks to the world and main character (behavior). I am speed-running the rest of my first draft to honor this version of the outline so I can get into the nitty-gritty of problem solving in the second draft. Will need to adjust some of the core elements but hopefully I can keep most of the outline. So in the meantime my dialogue and action lines are suffering but I am not worried about the quality right now- moving forward!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Began Act 3

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

I’m speeding up as I enter Act 3 which is nice but it means I’m leaving some gaps and shorter scenes behind, which is affecting my page count. Not all my scenes have all the right dialogue or action lines, but I’m leaving notes in places that need more attention and trying to muscle onwards.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Assignment 1

Alyssa’s Basic Instinct Stacking Suspense

Things I learned:

1. Keep the audience guessing and don’t give too much away early on.
2. Make sure there are stakes every couple of scenes to keep the tension high.
3. Can make the dialogue unique but also vague enough to be interpreted multiple ways, in order to add mystery and intrigue.
4. Make sure people’s alibi’s and arguments/defenses are believable enough to keep the audience second guessing themselves, like the protagonist is.
5. I never felt like Nick was an idiot when he missed things or that information was too easily handed to him. I liked how Beth’s counter argument to Catherine’s (about who stalked who) was believable enough to make Nick question things.
6. I didn’t really buy everything in the movie, like Roxy trying to kill Nick (felt random and everyone moved on really fast), or Gus going to meet Beth alone (if Nick suspected her, why wouldn’t he insist on going too?) and I think Catherine killed Johnny (why would Johnny ever think Beth was the same woman and sleep with her, blonde wig or not?). But I appreciated the movie for what it was with clear thriller elements.

Assignment 2

Alyssa’s Bourne Identity Stacking Suspense

Things I learned:

1. Amnesia is an effective thriller tool as it’s really fun for the audience to discover things alongside the character, even basic things. But while amnesia can be a crutch and can be overused, it’s definitely entertaining in this film.
2. As an audience, being able to see the BTS of what the organization (villain) is doing WHILE Jason is figuring things out adds tension. Both parties remain active, either on offense or defense, the whole time. No passive actions.
3. It was fun to watch Jason switch from defense to offense- it shakes up the story and the formula we expect (Jason on the back foot) switches to a new dynamic.
4. Once Marie leaves, there’s no one for Jason to tell his plan too so we are on the edge of our seats wondering what Jason’s play is. The cat and mouse tables are turned and it reengages the audience.
5. There were a lot of life and death situations but it never felt redundant- because we know early on that the villains goal is to kill Jason, the stakes are organically high in every scene and as Jason gets closer to the truth, it keeps the stakes interesting and tension going- we want to know the truth just as badly, especially at the end climax.
6. Jason is likable even though he’s a killer- because we meet him beforehand, and note his aversion to killing/guns (he doesn’t kill the cops, he leaves the gun behind) it make him feel less ‘cruel’ and cold, even when he does kill later on. His relationship and care for Marie warms him up; a strong side character is very important to showcase the hero’s vulnerability and humanity.

Overall, Bourne was much more enjoyable to me than Basic Instinct. I cared about Jason more than Nick, although both characters are interesting. I got “out of the car” more during Basic Instinct, where I questioned plot points and character motivations- but that might have been because I already knew who did it from Hal’s earlier material so I wasn’t as engaged in the guessing process. I also didn’t really care if anyone lived or died. In Bourne, I cared for both Jason and Marie because the story made me care, which heightened the tension. Basic Instinct was also a slower movie, which is fine but it made it easier to lose focus (for me). Bourne definitely kept the pace fast and barely ever let up, except for a few quick breathers.

Great assignment!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Completed Act 2

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

Finally finished act 2 and hit my midpoint! It’s hitting a little earlier than I’d like (re: page count), but I have some gaps in the first two acts that, once filled in, should push me to the 50ish page mark. I know it’s not about exact page numbers, but I do want this moment to end up about halfway through so that’s something I’ll keep any eye on for my second draft.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s World and Characters!

What I learned: This process is really helping! I changed my narrative a little bit, to be focused more on the characters and their involvement in the story rather just than a big bad villain and basic plot- my character’s roles in the narrative became more focused and in the forefront. Everyone wants Cobra (our hero’s former partner) because they think he has access to the main villain or knows some deep secret about the villain that will wreck his plans, and our hero Ace is the only one who can find him.

Current logline: An unpredictable ex-CIA agent with trust issues is roped into hunting down her traitorous former partner who holds the key to stopping a villain who wants to blow up the world.

Big Mystery: Does Cobra actually know who is is bombing major cities and will he help Ace, if she can find him?

Big Intrigue: Who does Cobra actually work for and is it linked to the shadow organization she now works for? Will Cobra help her or is he lying all over again, like when he betrayed her before? Will Cobra tell his secrets or die with them?

Big Suspense: Will Cobra, once found, try to kill her again despite offering to help? Will the bombs keep destroying cities, including the one our heroes are in? Will Cobra help Ace or is he setting her up?

Intriguing World: I’m still working on developing a unique world for my story, but it’ll be the life and work of these spies within this world-wide shadow organization and how it interacts with other organizations (CIA, MI6, etc)

<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>HERO: Ace

Mystery: Ace is an unpredictable ex-CIA agent who works for the shadow organization trying to change the world after her former partner betrayed her and left her for dead, causing her to distrust everyone- especially new partners.

Intrigue: What really happened between her and Cobra? Will she work with the CIA or is she operating on her own terms? Can she learn to trust Bryson as her new partner or will she leave him hanging at the worst moment?

Suspense: Can she learn to trust herself and others or will she end up trusting the wrong person once again, putting her life and the world in danger? Will her unpredictable nature help her succeed or cause her to fail? Who is trying to stop her from finding Cobra, who will kill to keep her away?

RED HERRING: Bryson, Ace’s new partner

Mystery: Who is Bryson and why is his past shrouded in red tape?

Intrigue: Why does he know so much about Ace, Cobra and their pasts?

Suspense: Is Bryson a plant by the villain and just another partner who will betray Ace?

RED HERRING: Cobra, Ace’s former partner

Mystery: Can Ace find Cobra and get him to talk before more cities burn?

Intrigue: Ace and Cobra were former partners and lovers- what happened that caused him to betray her? Who does he work for now? Is he an enemy who is working with the villain or is he a covert agent trying to stop him? What does he know and why does everyone want to find him?

Suspense: Is he going to help Ace or try to kill her again?

VILLAIN: Lintz, leader of the shadow organization

Mystery: How did he become the head of the shadow organization that operates as spies for hire to help bring world change for the better, without the red tape? Are they only doing good or does he have another agenda?

Intrigue: Why does Lintz send his best agent back to the CIA right before an important mission? Does he know something more about what’s going on? Is he a good guy or has he sold his soul to the highest bidder?

Suspense: Is Lintz’s organization really helping the world or making things worse? And if Ace finds out what he’s up to, will he kill her?

• This reply was modified 1 year, 8 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Continuing Act 2

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

How it’s going: Well I got totally sidetracked by a brand new project so I wrote a first draft for that in a little over a week, which is great! High speed writing hit hardcore with that one. But I got behind on this one. Going back to the 10-minute timer trick to get into the swing of this story again. It’s not coming as easily but I’m gonna power through.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Big M.I.S.

What I learned doing this assignment: How digging through these questions will help me develop my main idea into an intriguing story with a more unique plot.

Logline: An unpredictable ex-CIA agent with severe trust issues is roped into one final mission to hunt down her traitorous former partner who appears to work for the man who wants to blow up the world.

The overall plot feels a little generic so I’m looking forward to diving even deeper in order to get a little more unique.

Unwitting but Resourceful Hero: A unpredictable ex-CIA agent who now works for a shadow organization is called back in to track down her old partner who she was in love with and then tried to kill her, making her distrust any partner she’s had since

Dangerous Villain: Her former partner appears to be in cahoots with a dangerous man who wants to watch the world burn for his benefit.

High stakes: Will her former partner try to kill her again? Will she succeed in preventing the world’s destruction?

Life and death situations: Bomb diffusions, gun fights, dangerous people after her and her new partner, her old partner being a threat to her while trying to work with him to take down the actual threat

This movie is thrilling because? She’s unpredictable and tries to cause her new partner to quit, which will put her in harm’s way all alone, and she has to track down her old partner to discover why he went rogue before- and if he still is, why is working under this big bad guy- or is he even more involved than she thinks?

Big Mystery: Will they be able to discover who is is bombing major cities?

Big Intrigue: Who does her former partner work for and is it linked to the shadow organization she now works for? Is her former partner helping her and on her side now, or lying all over again?

Big Suspense: Will her former partner, once found, try to kill her again despite offering to help? Will the bombs keep destroying cities, including the one our heroes are in?

[Alyssa Giannola]

Missing’s (2023) Thriller Conventions

What I learned doing this assignment: how fun it is to analyze a great thriller and discover what works and what doesn’t work, and determine the WHY behind it.

SPOILERS for the 2023 movie “Missing.”

• Unwitting but Resourceful Hero: June is an 18-year-old computer savvy teen who spends almost all of her time online. When her mother goes missing, she takes matters into her own hands to enlist help, find cameras, guess passwords, and hunt down who kidnapped her mom.<div>
• Dangerous Villain: The father who the movie tricks you to believe has died, but really he is organizing things behind the scenes to take revenge on the mom and get June for himself.
• High stakes: June’s mother’s life is in danger. A character who is revealed to be involved ends up dead, and then another character dies as well showing it’s getting more dangerous. At the end, June’s life is at risk too.
• Life and death situations: Her mom is assumed to be kidnapped as it’s seen on cameras. Towards the end, June is abducted and she has to work with her mom to outwit the delusional father and escape, or die.
• This movie is thrilling because? It has great setups, payoffs and reveals. The turning points are well done and keep you engaged as she discovers more and more about what’s going on.
• Big Mystery: What happened to June’s mom?
• Big Intrigue: The boyfriend who was with June’s mom has a criminal past and upon further digging, June’s mom also has a mysterious past sealed by a court order.
• Big Suspense: Will June be able to find and save her mom before it’s too late?

While I didn’t love the ending and there were some plot holes, I did love how it kept me on the edge of my seat throughout. And it was clever in its use of clues: at one huge reveal, I was genuinely surprised but then I remembered that I actually had guessed that was coming earlier on when a clue was given, but the movie was so engaging that it MADE me forget that I had guessed it already, so I was still surprised!!

• This reply was modified 1 year, 8 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hello, everyone!

1. My name is Alyssa Giannola

2. I have written 3 feature scripts and am working on my 4th in Hal’s 6-month class.

3. I hope to crystallize the plot for a spy thriller concept I have and master the keys to this genre, as I have a few other thriller ideas marinating as well.

4. I lived in Switzerland for 3 months and love traveling to other countries, although I’ve only been to a handful so far!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Giannola

I agree to the terms of this release form.

As a member of this group, I agree to the following:

1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.

2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.

I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.

3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.

4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.

5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.

6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Began Act 2

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

The timer is definitely helping! I’ve been setting it for 10 minutes at a time like the assignment suggested and making better progress- not quite as fast as I’d like, but a decent pace. I’m about halfway through my outline. Hoping to speed up as I go!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Finished Act 1

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

I’m a few pages in to act two and finding it more difficult to stay focused. My brain wants to go off in a bunch of other directions as I discover new possible scenes and second guess my original ones, so I’m making notes but trying to stick to my outline for this first pass. Maybe things will change in the second draft, I’m not sure yet. I appreciate the high speed process and rules but it’s definitely not coming as easy as I’d like, even though I have a strong road map. Pushing through!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Next Act 1 Scenes

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

How it’s going: I’ve finished act one which is exciting and am moving on to act two. There are a few scenes that I’ll have to flesh out more since I’m breezing over the more technical parts so I don’t stall out. Moving forward, staying focused (mostly) and appreciating the outline road map to keep me on track for this first pass- even though I’m making lots of notes on what I want to improve/add/change on the next draft!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Act 1 First Draft Part 1

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to stay focused and not go off on tangents or down rabbit holes!

How the process went: It’s going well so far, I’m on page 19 and am realizing that a big chunk of my outline is focused on act one- so I’m curious how the in-story pacing will feel as I get into the meat of act two and if I’m going to have enough to fill 90+ pages overall just with my outline scenes. I’m not going to worry about it too much now since it’s the first draft (focusing on speed!), but I’m curious what the second draft will entail.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s High Speed Writing Rules

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to push through and focus on moving forward even when I’m not totally happy with the words/dialogue.

How the process went: I usually discover my scene(s) as I write so I found myself skimming my outline a bit to add a quick scene. I’ll have to watch that. But as to the high speed rules, I like them and I think once I get into the groove it will be effective for me. The scene I wrote took about 10 minutes and, except for a few tweaks (whoops), I tried not to go backwards. I think setting a timer for each scene and just steamrolling through it will help me stay on track so I don’t get stuck in an editing loop.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s First Scene

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to stay on track and focused, just taking the outline and transferring it over to fill in the blanks. Trying not to wordsmith.

How the process went: I already had my first scene written to get the creative juices flowing, and it was pretty quick and easy, so I am looking forward to seeing how fast the next scenes go when I don’t have anything except the outline. It’s easy for me to get stuck on word smithing so I’m going to do my best to keep moving. Looking forward to the whole process!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Outline Exchange 1

I’d love to exchange feedback with anyone who’s ready! Let me know and we can share contact info!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Fascinating Scene Outlines!

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…it revealed some better scene arcs as I went, although a few scenes aren’t quite complete- either they’re short with only one big moment or transition scenes. I’ll keep working on the trouble spots to flesh them out more. Overall a fun assignment, I see the value in working through scenes this way!

INTRO VOICEOVER

1. EXT. ROOFTOP – DAY

Alex’s father has the “death fortune” and tries to throw himself, Alex (as a child) and Alex’s mother off a half-built skyscraper’s roof but Alex escapes at the last second.

• Beginning: (Betrayal) Alex and his mother are held hostage by the father
• Middle: (Uncertainty) The cops show up and try to calm the situation
• Ending: (Major Twist) Alex’s mother pushes him to safety but both parents fall off the edge

2. EXT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

30 years later: a sky car haphazardly flies through the city and parks badly in front of the lab. Alex exits, rushed, and hurries into the building (his official introduction).

• Beginning: (Mislead) A sky car whips around other cars as if a drunk driver or a car chase
• Middle: (Uncomfortable moment) Pedestrians jump out of the way and complain as Alex parks badly and almost hits people.
• Ending: (Reveal) Alex is sober but super late for an important event

3. INT. ALEX’S LAB – LOBBY – NIGHT

Alex is stopped by security robots until his assistant, Jo, enters and calms things down. The robots take a sample of his blood.

• Beginning: (Intrigue/Uncertainty) The robots won’t let him enter his own party
• Middle: (Reveal) Jo updated the security protocols and can get him past
• Ending: (Intrigue) The robots watch Alex in a creepy way- why?

4. INT. ALEX’S LAB – GALA ROOM – NIGHT

Jo asks Alex about the mystery announcement and newly rushed testing as they walk to the main stage for his speech.

• Beginning: (Mislead) Jo inquires about Alex’s announcement and he deflects
• Middle: (Reveal) Alex reveals he hasn’t gotten his fortune yet
• Ending: (Surprise) Jo drags him into the supply closet (but just to talk)

5. INT. ALEX’S LAB – SUPPLY CLOSET – NIGHT

Jo pulls Alex into a supply closet when he mentions he hasn’t gotten his fortune yet. They talk about delayed fortunes and hint at it being a bad sign.

• Beginning: (Mystery) Is getting a delayed fortune always a bad thing?
• Middle: (Internal dilemma) Alex reassures Jo instead of expressing his fear
• Ending: (Misinterpretation) A janitor opens the closet and mistakes them for lovers

6. INT. ALEX’S LAB – GALA ROOM – NIGHT

Alex announces his serum and how it will “set people free” from the religion of Fate. It’s not received well. In the middle, he receives a delayed fortune to destroy the experiment.

• Beginning: (Intrigue) Alex tells a story about his past leading into what the serum does
• Middle: (Uncomfortable moment) The audience is displeased with his speech
• Ending: (Major Twist) Alex receives his fortune and it’s to destroy his project

7. INT. ALEX’S LAB – LOBBY – NIGHT

Alex tries to run out of the building to avoid making the fortune come true but his head scientist, Lila, pings him about an emergency in the primary lab and he can’t leave.

• Beginning: (Surprise) Alex runs!
• Middle: (Intrigue) The doors are locked and he can’t get out- the robots are acting strange
• Ending: (External Dilemma) Lila tells him the experiment is in danger- will running prevent its destruction or can he save it himself? He goes back.

8. INT. ALEX’S LAB – PRIMARY LAB – NIGHT

Alex and Lila work to save the experiment but they fail part of the lab blows up, killing Jo, because Alex chooses his serum over her in a split second decision that reveals his flaw.

• Beginning: (Superior Position) Lila doesn’t know Alex’s fortune while she helps him.
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Is his presence making the situation worse or better?
• Ending: (External Dilemma) Doe he save the serum or Jo’s life?

9. EXT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

Alex gets medical care as Jo’s body is removed on a stretcher. Celia arrives in a police car and takes over his medical care. She gently interrogates Alex about what happened and he stubbornly deflects- the cracks in their marriage show. *His car is damaged by debris,

• Beginning: (Superior Position) Celia tries to find out the truth of the explosion, Alex knows
• Middle: (Mislead) Alex withholds what really happened and Celia is frustrated
• Ending: (Uncomfortable moment) Celia says she’s sleeping at the precinct, leaving Alex to go home alone.

10. EXT. SIDEWALK – NIGHT

Alex walks to his apartment and passes a crowd around a dead body- a jumper who took his life. We see the red band around his wrist, showing he had the death fortune just like Alex’s father- premonition of what’s coming for Alex (he’s still in denial)

• Beginning: (Mislead) Someone fell to their death, looks like an accident
• Middle: (Reveal) They had the death fortune like Alex’s father
• Ending: (Suspense) Will Alex end up with the same fate?

11. INT. ALEX’S APARTMENT – NIGHT to DAY

Alex is alone in his apartment. He looks at a photo of Celia and almost calls her to apologize. Stubbornly decides not to. Tries to sleep. At 6AM he gets the death fortune. He calls Celia in a panic but there’s no answer.

• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Does he call and apologize to Celia or not?
• Middle: (Uncertainty?) He stays up all night trying to remember the formulas
• Ending: (Major Twist/Cliffhanger) He receives the death fortune!

TURNING POINT #1 – END OF ACT 1

ACT 2: Alex recruits Celia to help him escape death and they pursue the Fate Walker.

12. INT. CELIA’S PRECINCT – COMMAND – DAY

Celia is in a briefing with Parker when Alex calls. Parker asks why she hasn’t left him yet, and she doesn’t answer Alex’s call.

• Beginning: (Suspense) Will she hear her phone and help?
• Middle: (Internal Dilemma) Should she call Alex back or is Parker right about him?
• Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) Parker is a nice guy but flirts with her- he’s jealous of Alex

13. EXT. TRANSPORT STATION – DAY

Alex takes the futuristic transport to the precinct but it malfunctions, almost killing him.

• Beginning: (Intrigue) Technology is acting oddly around Alex
• Middle: (Betrayal?) His safe transport malfunctions and is headed for collision!
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Should he go back home to safety or carry on?

14. INT. CELIA’S PRECINCT – DAY

Celia and Parker argue about Alex and her decisions. The “elevator” opens as Parker says something rude about Alex as the doors open on Alex, bloodied and annoyed.

• Beginning: (Mystery) Why is Parker trying to break Celia and Alex up?
• Middle: (Uncomfortable Moment) Alex shows up as Parker is dissing him
• Ending: (Mislead/Reveal) Alex brushes it off so Parker doesn’t think anything of it before pulling Celia away and asking her for help

15. INT. CELIA’S OFFICE/STATION – DAY

Alex tells Celia about the “death fortune” and that he needs her help to survive until 6AM.

• Beginning: (Mislead) Alex tells Celia he needs protection for the day
• Middle: (Reveal) Celia rolls up his sleeve to reveal the death fortune, she figured it out
• Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Why does he keep lying?

16. INT. MORGUE – DAY

Celia shows Alex bodies of other Fate Runners who tried to escape death but died anyways. They argue about his experiments and work. She finally agrees to help, says finding the Fate Walker is the only way, but he has to give up his work (the experiments). He lies and agrees.

• Beginning: (Suspense) Celia shows him the bodies of other Fate Runners who tried to escape the death fortune.
• Middle: (Misinterpretation) Alex thinks she wants him to give up and die
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Celia has a solution but Alex has to give up his work

17. INT. CELIA’S OFFICE/STATION – DAY

She grabs her gear and we see on her fortune flash on one of her devices: KILL ALEX CADE.

• Beginning: She goes into her “office” to get her gear while Alex waits
• Middle: Her computer/device pings to draw her attention.
• Ending: (Major Twist) Her fortune is to kill Alex!

18. INT. TEMPLE COURTS – DAY

Alex and Celia go to the main temple. Celia meets with the head priest but her request is denied. A church member slips a note to Alex to follow him and Alex leaves without telling Celia.

• Beginning: (More Interesting Setting) Celia approaches the priest while Alex waits
• Middle: (Mystery) Is the man who gave Alex the note on his side or against him?
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Alex left without telling Celia!

19. EXT. MARKET – DAY

Alex follows the church member into the market as Celia calls to yell at him. He suspects someone is following him but makes it safety to the meeting room.

• Beginning: (Suspense) Is someone following Alex?
• Middle: (More Interesting Setting) The market Alex walks through is very unusual
• Ending: (Internal Dilemma) Should Alex follow him into the room or turn around?

20. INT. BACK ROOM – DAY

The back room is shielded from all interference, which means their bands don’t work. The church member sets an hour glass on the table- they have five minutes to talk before they have to leave or they’ll die. Church member tells Alex his suspicions about the church and they get locked in. Celia saves them at the last minute.

• Beginning: (Reveal) The church isn’t what it seems and the Fate Walker knows the truth
• Middle: (Betrayal) Someone locked them in and they’ll die if they can’t get out
• Ending: (Surprise) Celia rescues them at the last second

21. EXT. MARKET – DAY

The church member is SHOT. Celia chases the shooter as Alex gets the final piece of information from the dying church member.

• Beginning: (Surprise) The church member is shot
• Middle: (Suspense) Can Celia catch the shooter? Will he shoot Alex too?
• Ending: (Reveal) The church member had a death fortune like Alex!

22. INT. PRECINCT – DAY

Celia and Alex enlist Parker’s help to get to the Fate Walker.

• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Alex is against asking Parker to help & Parker refuses to
• Middle: (Character Changes Radically) Parker changes course and helps
• Ending: (Intrigue/Mystery) Is Parker’s information accurate? What changed his mind?

23. ??? – DAY

Alex and Celia track down the Fate Walker’s “lair.” Still working on this scene/sequence and where the Fate Walker is. Might be a good place to showcase more of the city?

24. INT. NIJARA’S LAIR – DAY

Alex and Celia confront Nijara and she reveals the truth, controlling Alex and then Celia with her “master band.” Nijara wants Celia’s fortune to come true so tells her to kill Alex. But in doing this, reveals the secret to the bands and how Alex can finish his serum. They escape.

• Beginning: (Mislead) Nijara tries to mislead them about the truth
• Middle: (Major Twist/Reveal) Nijara can control them and Fate is an AI
• Ending: (Suspense/Uncertainty) Alex distracts with an EMP (or other sort of tool) while Celia shoots Nijara’s band allowing them to escape.

TURNING POINT #2 – MIDPOINT

Act 3: Finish the serum before the data is lost forever.

25. NURSING HOME?? – DAY

Alex enlists Lila’s help to access his old lab and server data.

• Beginning: (More Interesting Location) Alex corners Lila as she helps at a nursing home (or a place like this for more world building)
• Middle: (Misinterpretation) Alex lies about his intentions and says they have permission
• Ending: (Suspense) Lila gives him what he wants but will she turn him in?

26. INT. NIJARA’S LAIR – DAY

Nijara is reprimanded by the AI. She sends a message to the assassin who killed the church member to kill Alex next.

• Beginning: (Betrayal) The AI treats her like child for the first time
• Middle: (Suspense) There’s a tug of war between them
• Ending: (Uncomfortable Moment) Nijara rebukes the AI, reasserting herself

27. EXT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

Alex and Celia sneak by the guard bots and break into the building.

• Beginning: (Intrigue) Did Parker deactivate the guard bots or not?
• Middle: (External Dilemma) Lila’s key card doesn’t work: alternate route or give up
• Ending: (Reveal) Celia has cool break-in gadgets and a backup plan

28. INT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

Alex works on the serum but the assassin arrives and Celia fights him off. The incineration process starts. They barely escape with one vial of serum.

• Beginning: (Uncertainty) Can they finish the serum in time?
• Middle: (Surprise) The assassin shows up
• Ending: (External Dilemma) Does Alex save Celia or the serum? (Mirror same dilemma from beginning but assassin saves Celia before Alex can)

29. INT. NIJARA’S LAIR – NIGHT

Nijara argues with the AI about going after Alex but is denied.

• Beginning: (Uncomfortable moment) Nijara says she’s going after Alex and AI says no
• Middle: (Mislead) Nijara acts subservient and agrees to send the robots
• Ending: (Reveal) But she is pretending and prepares to go herself

30. EXT. STREETS – NIGHT

Alex and Celia are targeted by hostile robots and make a run for it.

• Beginning: (Superior Position) We know the robots will turn on them at any second
• Middle: (Mislead) The robots near them all turn off suddenly.
• Ending: (Reveal) They turn back on and are hostile!

31. INT. MEDI-CENTER or APARTMENT? – NIGHT

Alex and Celia hide out from robots and Alex takes the serum which makes him go insane, forcing Celia to cut off the band with his hand. They have a deep heart to heart as they wait to see if he dies without the band. He survives proving the serum works.

• Beginning: (Internal Dilemma) Does Alex take the serum knowing it might kill him?
• Middle: (Surprise) Celia cuts his arm off to save him
• Ending: (Major Twist) The serum works and Alex is OK!

TURNING POINT #3

ACT 4: Alex must get across the city to give his blood and instructions to Lila before Fate wins.

32. EXT. CITY GARAGE – NIGHT

Alex and Celia hijack a sky car to quickly get across the city as the robots close in. They switch cars halfway through to mislead the robots.

• Beginning: (Mislead / Reveal) It starts as a regular car chase but they take to the skies
• Middle: (Uncertainty) Will they get away safely?
• Ending: (Superior Position) We know they switch cars but the robots don’t (OR we are also kept in dark for suspense)

33. EXT. SKYSCRAPER ROOFTOP – NIGHT

Nijara’s robots chase and take down Celia’s car, giving Alex a clean getaway.

• Beginning: (Misinterpretation) The robots think Celia’s car has Alex in it
• Middle: (Superior Position) We know Alex is getting away
• Ending: (Suspense) Will the robots kill Celia?

Alex crashes into the robots at the last moment, destroying them, and saves Celia. They share a kiss since he finally chooses her over his work (though she remarks on the terrible timing).

• Beginning: (External Dilemma) Does he save himself (and the world) or save Celia?
• Middle: (Surprise) He saves Celia and puts himself in danger
• Ending: (More Interesting Setting) It’s the skyscraper where Alex’s father killed himself

Nijara arrives, takes control of Celia and orders her to kill Alex. Celia is able to fight the mind control and shoots Nijara instead of Alex.

• Beginning: (Surprise) Nijara shows up and takes over Celia
• Middle: (External Dilemma) Does Celia kill Alex and save herself or fight back?
• Ending: (Major Twist) Celia fights back and kills Nijara instead

Parker arrives and fatally shoots Alex, as he’s the assassin. Celia receives the Death Fortune and takes a vial of Alex’s blood to finish his mission.

• Beginning: (Betrayal) Parker shoots Alex
• Middle: (Uncertainty) Can Celia save his life?
• Ending: (Surprise) Alex dies at 6:01AM, beating fate after all

34. INT. SERVER ROOM – NIGHT

Nijara is reborn in a vat as a clone who has had her memory wiped over and over for the last 300 years (or however long it’s been).

• Beginning: (Surprise) Nijara is alive
• Middle: (Mislead/Reveal) We think she is purely human but she is actually a clone
• Ending: (Cliffhanger) Will Nijara turn against the AI?

• This reply was modified 1 year, 9 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Scene Requirements

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how helpful it is to break down scenes in this way and collect scattered thoughts into a logical and emotionally impactful way. It revealed a few beats that I needed to change from my original beat sheet. There are a few things still missing, hoping to fill those in as I go.

ACT 1: Alex becomes a Fate Runner and receives the Death Fortune

FADE IN

Opens with a V.O. from Nijara that gives exposition about the state of the world, Fate being the new god, and introduces the idea of daily fortunes (one page with minor visuals).

1. EXT. ROOFTOP – DAY

Alex’s father has the “death fortune” and tries to throw himself, Alex (as a child) and Alex’s mother off a half-built skyscraper’s roof but Alex escapes at the last second.

• Scene Arc: From looming death for all three to one survivor
• Essence: Alex survives his father’s murder-suicide
• Conflict: Alex vs his father, his father vs mother, father vs the cops
  Subtext: Alex is the reason his father received the Death Fortune
• Hope/fear: Fear for Alex and his family. Hope that Alex will escape.

2. EXT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

30 years later: a sky car haphazardly flies through the city and parks badly in front of the lab. Alex exits, rushed, and hurries into the building (his official introduction).

• Scene Arc: From danger (driving) to relief (only late)
• Essence: Alex arrives late for the gala.
• Conflict: Alex vs pedestrians who are annoyed at his driving/parking skills.
• Subtext: His car, clothes and lab are all a bit run down revealing he’s running out of money.
• Hope/fear: Fear that this guy is drunk and could hurt someone. Hope that he doesn’t.

3. INT. ALEX’S LAB – LOBBY – NIGHT

Alex is stopped by security robots until his assistant, Jo, enters and calms things down.

• Scene arc: From getting kicked out to escorted in
• Essence: Jo helps Alex get past robots
• Conflict: Alex vs the robots
• Subtext: Alex distrusts technology that he can’t control
• Hope/fear: Fear the robots may kick him out to hope as Jo arrives.

4. INT. ALEX’S LAB – GALA ROOM – NIGHT

Jo asks Alex about the mystery announcement and testing as they walk to the main stage.

• Scene Arc: From confidence to anxiety (delayed fortune reveal)
• Essence: Jo and Alex discuss the upcoming announcement.
• Conflict: Alex vs Jo
• Subtext: Alex doesn’t want to tell Jo the truth because she’s a believer in Fate.
• Hope/fear: Fear that his delayed fortune might be a bad sign. Hope that it’s fine.

5. INT. ALEX’S LAB – SUPPLY CLOSET – NIGHT

Jo pulls Alex into a supply closet when he mentions he hasn’t gotten his fortune yet.

• Scene Arc: From worry to partial reassurance
• Essence: Alex and Jo discuss his delayed fortune and what it could mean.
• Conflict: Alex vs Jo as she interrogates him on the delayed fortune, he deflects
• Subtext: Jo is attracted to Alex and he’s not immune.
• Hope/fear: Fear that his delayed fortune might be a bad sign. Hope that it’s fine.

6. INT. ALEX’S LAB – GALA ROOM – NIGHT

Alex announces his project and how it will “set people free” from the religion of Fate. It’s not received well. He receives a delayed fortune to destroy the experiment.

• Scene Arc: From confidence to shattered hope
• Essence: Alex gives a speech and then gets a fortune to destroy his project.
• Conflict: Alex vs crowd as they react badly, Alex vs himself when he gets the fortune
• Subtext: Jo is shocked about Alex’s revelation. Alex is terrified of the fortune he received
• Hope/fear: Hope that his speech will be received well. Fear that he got terrible news.

7. INT. ALEX’S LAB – LOBBY – NIGHT

Alex tries to run but his head scientist, Lila, pings him about an emergency and he can’t leave.

• Scene Arc: From running away to running back in
• Essence: Alex tries to leave the building but is called back for an emergency
• Conflict: Alex vs himself as he attempts to run, Alex vs Jo as she convinces him to obey
• Subtext: He’ll do anything but destroy his life’s work, even if it kills him.
• Hope/fear: Hope that Alex can escape. Fear that he can’t.

8. INT. ALEX’S LAB – PRIMARY LAB – NIGHT

Alex and Lila work to save the experiment but they fail and part of the lab blows up, killing Jo.

• Scene Arc: From confident to defeated
• Essence: The serum is destroyed and Jo dies.
• Conflict: Alex vs experiment as it overheats, Alex vs Jo as she tries to stop him.
• Subtext: Jo knows what Alex’s fate is but he doesn’t let her tell Lila.
• Hope/fear: From hope that Alex can change his fate to fear for their lives

9. EXT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

Alex gets medical care as Jo’s body is removed. Celia interrogates Alex about what happened.

• Scene Arc: From sorrow and affection to frustration and further separation.
• Essence: Alex and Celia argue about what really happened.
• Conflict: Alex vs Celia
• Subtext: Alex is in denial. Their marriage is on the rocks. Celia still cares for him.
• Hope/Fear: Hope they get along, fear they’ll push each other away

10. EXT. SIDEWALK – NIGHT

Alex walks to his apartment and passes a jumper w/ a death fortune who threw himself from the roof, just like his father did.

• Scene Arc: From denial about his future to a reminder of his past and what could come
  Essence: Alex is reminded of his father’s death and that it’s his fault on his way home.
• Conflict: Alex vs himself as he tries to forget the past and deny the future
• Subtext: He’s reminded of his guilt. Afraid of the future.
• Hope/fear: Fear of what’s to come. Hope that Alex can avoid the death fortune.

11. INT. ALEX’S APARTMENT – NIGHT to DAY

Alex is in his apartment. At 6AM he gets the death fortune. He calls Celia but there’s no answer.

• Scene Arc: From sorrow about the past to fear of death/failure
• Essence: Alex gets the death fortune.
• Conflict: Alex vs himself, Alex vs fate as he chooses to fight it.
• Subtext: He’s afraid of failure and dying like his father.
• Hope/fear: Hope that he will reconnect with Celia. Fear that he’s going to die.

TURNING POINT #1 – END OF ACT 1

ACT 2: Alex recruits Celia to help him escape death and they pursue the Fate Walker.

12. INT. CELIA’S PRECINCT – COMMAND – DAY

Celia is in a briefing with Parker, who sees Alex is calling, and pushes her to leave him.

• Scene Arc: From partners to “enemies” (differing opinions)
• Essence: Celia ignores Alex’s call.
• Conflict: Celia vs Parker as he pushes her about Alex, she pushes back.
• Subtext: Parker is in love with Celia and she doesn’t know it.
• Hope/fear: Hope she’ll answer the phone to fear she won’t while Alex is in trouble.

13. EXT. TRANSPORT STATION – DAY

Alex takes the futuristic transport but it malfunctions, almost killing him.

• Scene Arc: From safety to danger
• Essence: Alex is almost killed on the way to the precinct.
• Conflict: Alex vs technology
• Subtext: Nijara/The AI is manipulating the transport to malfunction
• Hope/fear: We fear he’ll die. We hope he escapes.

14. INT. CELIA’S PRECINCT – DAY

Celia and Parker argue about Alex as he arrives, bloodied.

• Scene Arc: From a typical day to disaster approaching
• Essence: Alex arrives at the precinct
• Conflict: Celia vs Parker, Alex vs Parker
• Subtext: Parker is jealous of Alex (over Celia), Alex distrusts Parker
• Hope/fear: We fear Alex and Parker will get in a fight, we hope they don’t

15. INT. CELIA’S OFFICE/STATION – DAY

Sequence arc: from “enemies” (in regards to goals) to being on the same page

Alex tells Celia about the “death fortune” and that he needs her help to survive until 6AM.

• Essence: Alex tells Celia what’s going on
• Conflict: Alex vs Celia
• Subtext: Alex is afraid
• Hope/fear: Fear Celia won’t help, hope she can

16. INT. MORGUE – DAY

Celia shows Alex bodies of other Fate Runners who tried to escape death but died anyways.

He convinces her to help him but only if he gives up his ambitions.

• Essence: Celia and Alex agree to work together
• Conflict: Alex vs Celia
• Subtext: Alex lies to Celia
• Hope/fear: Fear Celia won’t help, hope they can figure things out together

17. INT. CELIA’S OFFICE/STATION – DAY

She grabs her gear and we see on her fortune flash on one of her devices: KILL ALEX CADE.

• Essence: Celia is the one who has to kill Alex but he doesn’t know
• Conflict: Celia vs herself
• Subtext: She doesn’t tell Alex her fortune
• Hope/fear: Fear she’s going to kill Alex, hope she won’t

18. INT. CHURCH – DAY

Celia meets with a priest but is denied. A church member slips a note to Alex to follow him and he leaves without telling Celia.

• Scene Arc: From working together to Alex going on his own
• Essence: At the church Alex receives a note to follow someone
• Conflict: Celia vs priest
  Subtext: Alex doesn’t tell Celia he’s leaving
• Hope/fear: Fear this is a dead end, hope Alex has a chance

19. EXT. MARKET – DAY

Alex follows the church member into the market as Celia calls to yell at him. He suspects someone is following him but makes it safety to the meeting room.

• Scene arc: From danger to safety
• Essence: Alex follows the church member through the market
• Conflict: Alex vs unknown pursuer, Alex vs Celia
• Subtext: Parker is the pursuer
• Hope/fear: Hope Alex will survive and get information, fear he’s walking into a trap

20. INT. BACK ROOM – DAY

Church member tells Alex his suspicions about the church and they get locked in (about to die) but Celia saves them at the last minute.

• Scene arc: From safety to danger
• Essence: Alex is faced with the truth of the church and is almost killed
• Conflict: Alex vs the room, as they’re locked in and can’t get out.
• Subtext: Parker locked them in
• Hope/fear: Fear they will die, hope someone will save them

21. EXT. MARKET – DAY

The church member is SHOT. Celia chases the shooter as Alex gets the final piece of information from the dying church member.

• Scene arc: from danger to safety
• Essence: Alex gets information as Celia chases the shooter
• Conflict: Celia vs shooter
• Subtext: The church member also has the death fortune
• Hope/fear: Fear Alex and Celia will die, hope Celia can catch the shooter

22. INT. PRECINCT – DAY

Celia and Alex enlist Parker’s help to get to the Fate Walker.

• Scene Arc: From “enemies” to working together
• Essence: Celia convinces Parker to help Alex
• Conflict: Celia and Alex vs Parker
• Subtext: Parker and Alex hate each other, Parker loves Celia and Alex starts to suspect
• Hope/fear: Fear Parker won’t help, hope he will

**TRAVEL/TRANSITION SCENE – FINDING NIJARA?

23. INT. NIJARA’S LAIR – DAY

Alex and Celia confront Nijara but escape before she can kill them.

• Scene Arc: From guests to prisoners to escapees
• Essence: Alex and Celia discover the truth of the church and the AI
• Conflict: Alex and Celia vs Nijara
• Subtext: Nijara’s control, Celia’s fortune, Alex’s fears- there’s lot going on in this scene
• Hope/fear: Fear they will be killed, hope they will escape

TURNING POINT #2 – MIDPOINT

Act 3: Finish the serum before the data is lost forever.

24. INT. LILA’S APARTMENT? – DAY

Alex enlists Lila’s help to access his old lab and server data.

• Scene Arc: ?
• Essence: Alex goes to Lila’s home to convince her to give him her security code to override the lab lockdown (his is invalidated)
• Conflict: Alex vs Lila
• Subtext: Is Alex hiding the truth from Lila?
• Hope/fear: Fear Lila won’t help, hope she will

25. INT. PRECINCT / GYM – DAY

Celia enlists Parker’s help to bypass the guard bots.

• Scene Arc: From helpful to suspicious (on Celia’s part)
• Essence: Celia meets Parker in the gym to convince him to turn off the bots for an hour.
  Conflict: Celia vs Parker
• Subtext: Parker wants Celia to stay away from Alex so he can kill him
• Hope/fear: Fear Parker won’t help, hope he will

26. INT. NIJARA’S LAIR – DAY

Nijara is reprimanded by the AI. She sends a message to the assassin who killed the church member to kill Alex next.

• Scene Arc: From a chastised child back to position of authority
• Essence: Nijara argues with the AI and
• Conflict: Nijara vs AI, Nijara vs assassin
• Subtext: Nijara dislikes the AI’s plan and treatment of her
• Hope/fear: Fear the assassin will kill Alex, hope he won’t

27. EXT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

Alex and Celia sneak by the guard bots and break into the building.

Sequence Arc: From breaking in covertly to a fiery escape that almost kills them.

• Essence: Alex and Celia break in to the lab
• Conflict: Alex and Celia vs guard bots
• Subtext: Their relationship is strengthening as they work together
• Hope/fear: Fear they’ll get caught, hope they’ll succeed

28. INT. ALEX’S LAB – NIGHT

Alex works on the serum but the assassin arrives and Celia fights him off. The incineration process starts. They barely escape with one vial of serum.

• Essence: Alex finishes the serum while Celia fights off the assassin, they escape.
• Conflict: Celia vs assassin, Alex vs time, everyone vs incineration
• Subtext: Alex values his work too highly, puts Celia in danger. The assassin holds back
  Hope/fear: Fear everyone will die, hope they’ll survive

29. INT. NIJARA’S LAIR – NIGHT

Nijara argues with the AI about going after Alex but is denied.

• Scene Arc: From equals to not equals
• Essence: Nijara and the AI argue
• Conflict: Nijara vs AI
• Subtext: Nijara plans on disobeying the AI, the AI is concerned about her
• Hope/fear: Fear Nijara will go after Alex, Hope she won’t

30. EXT. STREETS – NIGHT

Alex and Celia are targeted by hostile robots and make a run for it.

• Scene Arc: From safety to danger
• Essence: The robots turn hostile and attack
• Alex
  Conflict: Alex and Celia vs robots
• Subtext: ?
• Hope/fear: Fear the robots will kill them, hope they’ll escape

31. INT. MEDI-CENTER or APARTMENT? – NIGHT

Alex and Celia hide out from robots and Alex takes the serum, forcing Celia to cut off his hand. He survives proving the serum works.

• Scene Arc: From hopelessness and defeat to victory
• Essence: Alex takes the serum and it works
• Conflict: Alex vs Celia
• Subtext: Deeper bonding between Alex and Celia
• Hope/fear: Fear Alex will die, hope the serum works

TURNING POINT #3

ACT 4: Alex must get across the city to give his blood and instructions to Lila before Fate wins.

32. EXT. CITY GARAGE – NIGHT

Alex and Celia hijack a sky car to quickly get across the city as the robots close in.

• Scene Arc: From ground to sky
• Essence: Sky car chase
• Conflict: Alex and Celia vs robots
• Subtext: They’re going to trick the robots
• Hope/fear: Fear the robots will catch them, hope they’ll escape

33. EXT. SKYWAY – NIGHT

Alex and Celia split up in the middle of the chase in separate cars.

• Scene Arc: From together to separate
• Essence: They split up
• Conflict: Alex vs Celia (if they’re arguing about the plan)
• Subtext: Tricking the robots who are tracking their bands
• Hope/fear: Fear Alex or Celia will die, hope they won’t

34. EXT. SKYSCRAPER ROOFTOP – NIGHT

Scene/Sequence arc: from defeat to victory to defeat again

This ending sequence takes place in one location (might adjust if it gets stale)

Nijara’s robots chase and take down Celia’s car, giving Alex a clean getaway.

• Essence: Celia’s car crashes and she’s surrounded by hostile robots
• Conflict: Celia vs robots
• Subtext: Celia thinks she’s going to die but at least Alex will live
• Hope/fear: Fear that she’s going to die, hope she defeats the robots

Alex crashes into the robots at the last moment, destroying them, and saves Celia.

• Essence: Alex saves Celia’s life and kills the robots
• Conflict: Alex vs robots, Celia vs Alex
• Subtext: Celia is grateful Alex saved her life but mad that he put himself in danger
• Hope/fear: Hope that Celia and Alex are alive, fear that it won’t last long (stranded)

Nijara arrives, takes control of Celia and orders her to kill Alex.

• Essence: Nijara forces Celia to pull a gun on Alex
• Conflict: Alex and Celia vs Nijara, Celia vs herself
• Subtext: Alex wants Celia to kill him and save herself
• Hope/fear: Fear Celia will kill Alex, hope that she won’t

Celia is able to fight the mind control and shoots Nijara instead of Alex.

• Essence: Celia kills Nijara
• Conflict: Celia vs herself, Celia vs Nijara
• Subtext: The AI gives Celia enough control to kill Nijara
• Hope/fear: Fear Celia will kill Alex, hope Nijara is dead for good

Parker arrives and fatally shoots Alex

• Essence: Alex is shot
• Conflict: Parker vs Alex, Parker vs Celia
• Subtext: Parker doesn’t know he gave Celia the death fortune by killing Alex instead of her or that he’s potentially doomed everyone.
• Hope/fear: Hope Alex will survive, fear he will die

Alex dies in Celia’s arms at 6:01AM. She receives the Death Fortune and takes a vial of Alex’s blood to finish his mission.

• Essence: Celia takes up Alex’s mission
• Conflict: Celia vs the world
• Subtext: Revenge
• Hope/fear: Hope Celia can take down the AI, fear she won’t be able to

35. INT. SERVER ROOM – NIGHT

Nijara is reborn in a vat as a clone who keeps having her memory wiped.

• Scene Arc: From confusion to anger
• Essence: Nijara finds out she’s not who she thinks she is
• Conflict: Nijara vs herself, Nijara vs AI
• Subtext: Nijara thought she was the AI’s partner, not its slave
• Hope/fear: Fear the villain is back to hope she switches sides

• This reply was modified 1 year, 9 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Intriguing Moments

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to dissect intrigue and identify those areas where I can add it or emphasize it. Still pondering if there’s more to be mined in some of the lighter acts, but I think I have a good start.

ACT ONE

• Mystery: Why does Alex’s mother tell him it’s not Alex’s fault before his father kills her?
• Covert Plan: The gala attendees and Alex’s assistant don’t know what announcement Alex is going to make; when Alex talk about “setting people free” they realize what he’s actually working on and it throws everyone in a tizzy.
• Cover up: When Celia presses Alex on whether the accident was Fate related or not, he intentionally misleads her; wants to convince himself too that he didn’t disobey his fortune or do anything wrong.

ACT TWO

• Mystery: Is Alex really fated to die? Can anyone escape the death fortune?
• Superior Position: Celia is fated to kill Alex and the audience finds out, but Alex doesn’t know.
• Intrigue: A church member slips Alex a note that suggests there’s something nefarious going on under the surface within the church.
• Scheme: An assassin is trying to kill Alex and almost succeeds.
• Mystery: Who is the Fate Walker and where is she hiding?
• Covert Agenda: Nijara is actively trying to kill Alex and allows him to find her so she can kill him herself.

ACT THREE

• Conspiracy: Alex and Celia have to lie (to Lila and Parker) to get into the lab before incineration for Alex to finish the serum.
• Intrigue: The assassin attacks them at the lab but instead of killing Celia to get to Alex, the assassin saves her life.
• Mystery: Who is this assassin and why is he holding back?

ACT FOUR

• Scheme: Alex and Celia split up to trick Nijara’s robots into following Celia instead of Alex, allowing him to escape.
• Covert agenda: Nijara disobeys the AI in order to stop Alex.
• Covert agenda: The AI allows Celia to overcome the mind/band control and kill Nijara instead as punishment for disobeying its orders.
• Hidden Identity: The assassin is revealed to be Parker.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Emotional Moments

One Sentence Vision: To be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…picking out the main emotional moments and strengthening them. I’m not sure if I’m 100% there yet, but it’s been helpful to intentionally think about the emotional moments throughout and make sure they’re present in every act.

ACT ONE

• Wound: Alex watches his father commit murder-suicide w/ his mother while barely escaping with his own life at 8 years old.
• Emotional Dilemma: Alex has to choose between saving his assistant/friend OR his experiment. Either she dies or he loses what he’s been working on for years.
• Distress: Alex sits on the curb and watches robots carry the dead body of his friend as smoke pours out of the hole in his lab. Alex lost two things he cared about in the same moment.

ACT TWO

• Moral Dilemma: Alex has to agree to let go of his obsession before Celia will help him; his survival vs his ambition, the latter he considers “for the greater good.”
• Courage: Alex tries to save the church member instead of running to save himself, showing that he’s starting to change and mirroring what he should have done with his friend.
• Bonding: Alex and Celia work together to temporarily defeat Nijara and escape, both using their unique skills which complement each other and remind them why they’re good together.

ACT THREE

• Hidden Weakness: In the lab, Alex stubbornly keeps working on the serum even when the incineration process starts and the assassin shows up, putting Celia’s life in danger too- which he realizes belatedly (he’s slowly changing).
• Breakthrough: Waiting to see if he dies without his band, Alex finally tells Celia that it was his fault his father received the Death Fortune and how it’s shaped his whole life. Celia takes his good hand and he finally realizes what he’s sacrificed because of guilt.
• Success/Winning: Once the clock runs out, Alex doesn’t die- the serum, Alex’s life work, actually WORKS.

ACT FOUR

• Courage: Alex drives his car into the robots to save Celia instead of running.
• Sacrifice/Love: When Celia is forced to pull a gun on Alex, he walks up to her and encourages her to stop fighting and do it- if she does, she can save herself, even though he will die.
• Betrayal: Parker fatally shoots Alex in front of Celia and they realize he’s been their enemy this whole time.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Reveals!

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to spread the reveals out throughout the story and make sure the setups are strong enough without giving things away. Still working on the timing of these and whether some are an audience reveal, where WE find out first, or a character reveal, where we find out at the same time as the character(s). Might need to strengthen them or add as I go…

Genre: Action / Sci-fi

ACT 1: Alex becomes a Fate Runner and receives the Death Fortune

Opening

Alex PJ 1: Opening scene of Alex as a child: his father has the Death Fortune and tries to kill himself along with his wife and Alex- Alex escapes (using his brain/smart) but both his parents die. (Unspoken Wound)

Setup 0: His mother tells Alex it’s “not his fault” before she dies

Genre Convention: Open with action

Deeper Layer: Alex was the one who caused his father to receive the Death Fortune but the audience doesn’t know this yet.

Alex PJ 2: 30 years later, Alex announces his secret project at a gala to free people from “Fate” via an experimental serum. His speech is not well-received.

Setup 0: He talks about his past trauma like its his fault just as much as Fate’s fault.

Deeper Layer: Alex is driven by guilt to destroy Fate like it destroyed his family

Nijara AJ 1 (off screen): Nijara sends Alex the delayed fortune at the behest of the AI.

INCITING INCIDENT: During his speech, Alex receives a delayed fortune to destroy the experiment in the next 15 minutes!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (ticking clock)

Alex PJ 3: Alex tries to save the experiment (A: determined & stubborn) which results in his assistant’s death and the experiment being destroyed anyway.

Deeper Layer: Guilt drives Alex to not give up on his goal even when it’s illogical/dangerous.

Setup A: Fate is intertwined with technology, the timing of Alex’s fortune linked to the experiment, the fact that it’s destroying something that could change the world.

Celia TJ 1: Celia arrives to the scene in a cop car to interrogate Alex and she susses out he’s lying to her about what happened (C: street smart) while taking over his medical care from a medic bot (C: controlling & capable)

Setup B: The experiment was destroyed, even though Alex didn’t do it, and he leads Celia to believe the accident was not his fault.

Alex PJ 4: They argue about his obsession and goals (A: stubborn / C: controlling)

Setup C: Alex and Celia clash and don’t seem to easily get along

Alex PJ 5: Alex goes home alone (A: pushes C away) while Celia sleeps at the precinct to help with overload (C: values duty)

Reveal C: They haven’t slept in the same bed in months (estranged marriage).

Alex PJ 6: At home, he looks at a photo of them happy together and almost calls Celia to apologize, but doesn’t (A: stubborn)

TURNING POINT 1: Alex receives the Death Fortune!

Reveal B: Alex gets the death fortune just like his father did (opening) = this world’s consequences!

ACT 2: Alex recruits Celia to help him escape death before time’s up.

Genre Convention: The hero must escape the inescapable

New Plan

Alex PJ 6: Alex takes public transport to the precinct to get Celia’s help.

Alex PJ 7: The transport malfunctions and almost kills him but he uses his brain and wits to escape unscathed/stop the malfunction (A: quick-witted).

Nijara AJ 2: Nijara/AI tries to kill Alex via technology but it fails (N: calculating).

Setup A: Alex almost dies by technology but it looks like an accident.

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (death is close!)

Celia TJ 2: Celia’s partner at the precinct, Parker, tries to convince her to leave Alex but she brushes him off (C: values duty).

Setup D: Parker hates Alex and cares for Celia, wants her to leave Alex. He’s athletic/works out.

Secret: Parker is in love with Celia.

Alex PJ 8: Alex arrives and has a verbal tiff with Parker about Fate (A: values science / P: values religion).

Alex PJ 9: Alex asks Celia to protect him for the day.

Celia TJ 3: Celia takes Alex to the morgue to convince him that he can’t escape the Death Fortune by running by showing him bodies of people who tried (C: controlling?)

Celia TJ 4: She tells him there might be another way: through the church. But he has to agree to not rebuild his lab and move on.

Setup E: Celia agrees to help Alex beat Fate and to protect him from dying but she hesitates; Alex assumes it’s because he’s mad at her.

Alex PJ 10: Alex agrees to her terms, to try and petition the Fate Walker to change his fate, but he’s lying (A: values his work)

Deception: Alex lies about his intention.

Reveal E / Secret: Celia’s fortune is to kill Alex herself! (Audience finds out here, Alex does not)

Plan in Action

Celia TJ 4: At the church, Celia requests an audience with the Fate Walker which is promptly denied by the priest.

Alex PJ 11: A church member slips Alex a secret message to meet up later.

Nijara AJ 3 (off screen): Nijara unleashes an assassin to kill Alex, since Celia hasn’t yet (N: cold/calculating).

Hidden Identity: The assassin is Parker, Celia’s partner.

Alex PJ 12: Alex and Celia head to the Crooked Market where the message said to meet (A: determined).

Alex PJ 13: The church member leads them to a secret room and tells them his suspicions about the Church.

Setup A: The church member sows doubt about the church/Fate Walker.

Celia TJ 5: Celia realizes there’s a bomb (C: street smart) and is able to save Alex before it goes off, but it mortally wounds the church member.

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (someone else is after Alex!)

Setup D: Parker calls Celia right before the bomb goes off to lead her away (Deeper Layer, P: values Celia); when she calls him back after chasing the assassin, Parker’s out of breath but claims he’s at the gym (P: athletic).

Celia TJ 6: Celia chases after the assassin but can’t catch him (C: protective, capable).

Alex PJ 14: Alex tries to save the dying church member (A: guilt) and ends up getting key info on the Fate Walker (her location? How to find her?).

Alex PJ 15: Alex and Celia have to enlist Parker’s help to gain access to the Fate Walker (they have the location but need help getting there?)

Setup D: Parker is more adamant about Celia leaving/abandoning Alex to Fate, he acts strangely around them both.

Deeper Layer/Hidden Identity: Parker wants to kill Alex but can’t because of Celia’s presence (P: values Celia).

Nijara AJ 4 (off screen): Nijara gives Parker permission to help Alex and Celia meet her.

Deeper Layer: Nijara is planning to kill them herself! (N: cold)

Genre Convention: Antagonist who is clearly corrupt / malicious

Alex PJ 16: Alex and Celia meet Nijara and their conversation quickly escalates, resulting in Alex pulling a gun on Nijara (A: determined) and her revealing she is able to mind/band control them both (limited power/control though- make this clear and make sense).

Setup A: Alex and Celia confront Nijara, their conversation plants more setup seeds as it escalates into the reveal…

Nijara AJ 5: Nijara reveals the truth about the AI to Alex and Celia.

Reveal A: …it’s a false religion: Fate is an AI and Nijara (the Fate Walker) helps it run the city!

Deeper Layer: Nijara believes she is a partner with the AI (deception on the part of the AI)

Reveal E: Alex finds out Celia’s fortune is to kill him! (I think it happens here)

TURNING POINT 2 – MIDPOINT: Alex discovers the truth about who Fate really is and Nijara accidentally reveals the missing piece for his serum (working on this part). Alex and Celia escape!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Act 3: Finish the serum before the data is lost forever.

Rethink Everything & New Plan

Alex PJ 17: Alex contacts his lead tech, Lila, in order to get access to his lab before incineration. (A: values work, pulls someone else into danger)

Nijara AJ 6: Nijara is reprimanded for letting someone leave with the knowledge of the AI. She raises the stakes for Parker to kill Alex: if he fails, he dies next.

Deeper Layer: The AI starts to consider Nijara as a weak link.

Setup F: Nijara always does what the AI wants even when it seems like it’s her idea, it’s hard for her to disobey, the AI talks to her like it owns her and reprimands her harshly.

Alex PJ 18: Alex and Celia break into the lab with Lila’s help (A: determined / C: capable).

Alex PJ 19: Alex is almost done with the the serum as the incineration begins but the assassin (Parker) arrives to finish him off (P: capable, vindictive).

Celia TJ 7: Celia fights off the assassin (C: capable, selfless) as the building burns while Alex finishes the serum (A: values work, smart).

Alex PJ 20: They barely escape with one vial of the serum.

Deeper Layer: In order to kill Alex, Parker has to kill Celia, and he can’t do it, which allows them time to escape (P: values Celia).

Setup D: The assassin seems to hold back when it comes to fighting Celia.

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Nijara AJ 7: Nijara wants to kill Alex herself to prove she’s capable (N: proud). The AI denies her request; instead, it sets the robots after Alex.

Alex PJ 21: The robots in the city turn hostile towards Alex, forcing him and Celia to go into hiding.

Alex PJ 22: With no way out and limited time left, Alex takes the serum (A: stubborn).

Deeper Layer: He has to know if it worked (still obsessed, hasn’t quite changed yet). Also, he is at the end of his rope and thinks there’s no way out even though Celia does (all is lost?)

Alex PJ 23: The chemicals from the band interact badly with the serum and Alex starts to lose his mind.

Reveal 0: Alex was the reason his father got the Death Fortune, therefore responsible for his parents death.

Celia TJ 8: Celia cuts off his arm/hand with the band on it. (C: capable, protective)

TURNING POINT 3: Alex doesn’t die revealing that his serum works! But there was only one vial: now Alex’s mind and blood hold the secret. If he dies, so does the chance of freedom.

Deeper Layer: Alex is vindicated but also starts to understand Celia’s sacrifice for him and realizes how much he loves for her.

ACT 4: Alex must get across the city to give his blood and instructions to Lila before Fate wins (time is almost up).

Alex PJ 24: Alex and Celia hijack a sky car to quickly get across the city as the robots close in (A: smart, C: capable).

Genre Convention: Escalating action (car chase!) and higher stakes (they have to save the whole city!)

Alex PJ 25: Alex and Celia split up in the middle of the chase in separate cars (A: smart, C: selfless).

Climax

Nijara AJ 8: Nijara’s robots chase and take down Celia’s car, giving Alex a clean getaway.

Alex PJ 26: Alex crashes into the robots, destroying them, and saves Celia. (A: determined, quick witted, arc is moving from values work to values people)

Transformational Journey: Putting himself and his goal in jeopardy to save someone he loves, from selfish ambition to selfless sacrifice.

Nijara AJ 9: Nijara arrives, defying the AI’s orders, and takes control of Celia. Orders her to kill Alex (N: calculating). Alex encourages Celia to do it (A: values people).

Setup F: It’s hard for Nijara to disobey the AI and should affect her strongly in a negative way.

Deeper Layer: Alex cares too much about Celia to let her die for him, even if it dooms the world. His arc is complete.

Celia TJ 9: Celia is able to fight the mind control and kills Nijara instead of Alex (C: protective)

Nijara AJ 10: Nijara dies.

Deeper Layer: The AI knows Nijara is officially off the rails and undermines her power, giving Celia enough control back to kill Nijara.

Alex PJ 27: They think they’ve won but Parker arrives and fatally shoots Alex (P: capable, vindictive).

Reveal D: Parker is the assassin!

Resolution

Alex PJ 28: Alex dies one minute AFTER the deadline, beating fate after all.

Celia TJ 10: Celia receives the Death Fortune and takes a vial of Alex’s blood to finish his mission (C: capable).

Nijara AJ 11: Nijara is reborn as a clone.

Reveal F: Nijara is a clone who was designed to assist the AI and it keeps wiping her memory!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Character Action Tracks!

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how challenging it is to show certain character traits through actions vs dialogue in what I’ve already set up. Working on brainstorming additional actions earlier on in the script. Right now, they’re more general than specific.

Genre: Action / Sci-fi

ACT 1: Alex becomes a Fate Runner and receives the Death Fortune

Opening

Alex PJ 1: Opening scene of Alex as a child: his father has the Death Fortune and tries to kill himself along with his wife and Alex- Alex escapes (using his brain/smart) but both his parents die. (Unspoken Wound)

Genre Convention: Open with action

Deeper Layer: Alex was the one who caused his father to receive the Death Fortune

Alex PJ 2: 30 years later, Alex announces his secret project at a gala to free people from “Fate” via an experimental serum. His speech is not well-received.

Deeper Layer: Alex is driven by guilt to destroy Fate like it destroyed his family

Nijara AJ 1 (off screen): Nijara sends Alex the delayed fortune at the behest of the AI.

INCITING INCIDENT: During his speech, Alex receives a delayed fortune to destroy the experiment in the next 15 minutes!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (ticking clock)

Alex PJ 3: Alex tries to save the experiment (A: determined & stubborn) which results in his assistant’s death and the experiment being destroyed anyway.

Deeper Layer: Guilt drives Alex to not give up on his goal even when it’s illogical/dangerous.

Celia TJ 1: Celia arrives to the scene in a cop car to interrogate Alex and she susses out he’s lying to her about what happened (C: street smart) while taking over his medical care from a medic bot (C: controlling & capable)

Alex PJ 4: They argue about his obsession and goals (A: stubborn / C: controlling)

Alex PJ 5: Alex goes home alone (A: pushes C away/stubborn) while Celia sleeps at the precinct to help with overload (C: values duty)

Deeper Layer: Alex’s relentless obsession is driving them towards divorce, although neither will admit it yet.

Alex PJ 6: At home, he looks at a photo of them happy together and almost calls Celia to apologize, but doesn’t (A: stubborn)

TURNING POINT 1: Alex receives the Death Fortune!

ACT 2: Alex recruits Celia to help him escape death before time’s up.

Genre Convention: The hero must escape the inescapable

New Plan

Alex PJ 6: Alex takes public transport to the precinct to get Celia’s help.

Alex PJ 7: The transport malfunctions and almost kills him but he uses his brain and wits to escape unscathed/stop the malfunction (A: quick-witted).

Nijara AJ 2: Nijara/AI tries to kill Alex via technology but it fails (N: calculating).

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (death is close!)

Celia TJ 2: Celia’s partner at the precinct, Parker, tries to convince her to leave Alex (P: values Celia) but she brushes him off (C: values duty).

Secret: Parker is in love with Celia.

Alex PJ 8: Alex arrives and has a verbal tiff with Parker about Fate (A: values work & science / P: values the church & religion).

Alex PJ 9: Alex asks Celia to protect him for the day.

Celia TJ 3: Celia takes Alex to the morgue to convince him that he can’t escape the Death Fortune by running by showing him bodies of people who tried (C: controlling?)

Celia TJ 4: She tells him there might be another way: through the church. But he has to agree to not rebuild his lab and move on.

Alex PJ 10: Alex agrees to her terms, to try and petition the Fate Walker to change his fate, but he’s lying (A: values his work)

Deception: Alex lies about his intention.

Secret: Celia doesn’t tell Alex that her fortune is to kill him.

Plan in Action

Celia TJ 4: At the church, Celia requests an audience with the Fate Walker which is promptly denied by the priest.

Alex PJ 11: A church member slips Alex a secret message to meet up later.

Nijara AJ 3 (off screen): Nijara unleashes an assassin to kill Alex, since Celia hasn’t yet (N: cold/calculating).

Hidden Identity: The assassin is Parker, Celia’s partner.

Alex PJ 12: Alex and Celia head to the Crooked Market where the message said to meet (A: determined).

Alex PJ 13: The church member leads them to a secret room and tells them his suspicions about the Church.

Celia TJ 5: Celia realizes there’s a bomb (C: street smart) and is able to save Alex before it goes off, but it mortally wounds the church member.

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (someone else is after Alex!)

Deeper Layer: Parker set the bomb but tried to call Celia to lead her away (P: values Celia).

Celia TJ 6: Celia chases after the assassin but can’t catch him (C: protective, capable).

Alex PJ 14: Alex tries to save the dying church member (A: guilt) and ends up getting key info on the Fate Walker (A: quick-witted?).

Alex PJ 15: Alex and Celia have to enlist Parker’s help to gain access to the Fate Walker (they have the location but need help getting there?)

Deeper Layer/Hidden Identity: Parker wants to kill Alex but can’t because of Celia’s presence (P: values Celia). They don’t know he’s the assassin.

Nijara AJ 4 (off screen): Nijara gives Parker permission to help Alex and Celia meet her.

Deeper Layer: Nijara is planning to kill them herself! (N: cold)

Genre Convention: Antagonist who is clearly corrupt / malicious

Alex PJ 16: Alex and Celia meet Nijara and their conversation quickly escalates, resulting in Alex pulling a gun on Nijara (A: determined) and her revealing she is able to mind/band control them both (limited power/control though- make this clear and make sense).

Nijara AJ 5: Nijara reveals the truth about the AI to Alex and Celia.

Deeper Layer: Nijara believes she is a partner with the AI (deception on the part of the AI)

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Nijara and the AI are controlling people behind the scenes!

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Alex finds out Celia is fated to kill him!

TURNING POINT 2 – MIDPOINT: Alex discovers the truth about who Fate really is and Nijara accidentally reveals the missing piece for his serum (working on this part). Alex and Celia escape (A: quick-witted, C: capable)!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Act 3: Finish the serum before the data is lost forever.

Rethink Everything & New Plan

Alex PJ 17: Alex contacts his lead tech, Lila, in order to get access to his lab before incineration. (A: values work, puts someone else into danger)

Nijara AJ 6: Nijara is reprimanded for letting someone leave with the knowledge of the AI. She raises the stakes for Parker to kill Alex: if he fails, he dies next (.

Deeper Layer: The AI starts to consider Nijara as a weak link.

Deeper Layer: Nijara has never been scolded like this by the AI, as if she was a wayward child instead of a partner.

Alex PJ 18: Alex and Celia break into the lab with Lila’s help (A: determined / C: capable).

Alex PJ 19: Alex is almost done with the the serum as the incineration begins but Parker arrives to finish him off (P: capable, vindictive).

Celia TJ 7: Celia fights off Parker (C: capable, selfless) as the building burns while Alex finishes the serum (A: values work, smart).

Alex PJ 20: They barely escape with one vial of the serum.

Deeper Layer: In order to kill Alex, Parker has to kill Celia, and he can’t do it, which allows them time to escape (P: values Celia).

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Nijara AJ 7: Nijara wants to kill Alex herself to prove she’s capable (N: proud). The AI denies her request; instead, it sets the robots after Alex.

Alex PJ 21: The robots in the city turn hostile towards Alex, forcing him and Celia to go into hiding.

Alex PJ 22: With no way out and limited time left, Alex takes the serum (A: stubborn).

Deeper Layer: He has to know if it worked (still obsessed, hasn’t quite changed yet). Also, he is at the end of his rope and thinks there’s no way out even though Celia does (all is lost?)

Alex PJ 23: The chemicals from the band interact badly with the serum and Alex starts to lose his mind.

Celia TJ 8: Celia cuts off his arm/hand with the band on it. (C: capable, protective)

TURNING POINT 3: Alex doesn’t die revealing that his serum works! But there was only one vial: now Alex’s mind and blood hold the secret. If he dies, so does the chance of freedom.

Deeper Layer: Alex is vindicated but also starts to understand Celia’s sacrifice for him and realizes how much he loves for her.

ACT 4: Alex must get across the city to give his blood and instructions to Lila before Fate wins (time is almost up).

Alex PJ 24: Alex and Celia hijack a sky car to quickly get across the city as the robots close in (A: smart, C: capable).

Genre Convention: Escalating action (car chase!) and higher stakes (they have to save the whole city!)

Alex PJ 25: Alex and Celia split up in the middle of the chase in separate cars (A: smart, C: selfless).

Climax

Nijara AJ 8: Nijara’s robots chase and take down Celia’s car, giving Alex a clean getaway.

Alex PJ 26: Alex crashes into the robots, destroying them, and saves Celia. (A: determined, quick witted, arc is moving from values work to values people)

Transformational Journey: Putting himself and his goal in jeopardy to save someone he loves, from selfish ambition to selfless sacrifice.

Nijara AJ 9: Nijara arrives, defying the AI’s orders, and takes control of Celia. Orders her to kill Alex (N: calculating). Alex encourages Celia to do it (A: values people).

Deeper Layer: Alex cares too much about Celia to let her die for him, even if it dooms the world. His arc is complete.

Celia TJ 9: Celia is able to fight the mind control and kills Nijara instead of Alex (C: protective)

Nijara AJ 10: Nijara dies.

Deeper Layer: The AI knows Nijara is officially off the rails and undermines her power, giving Celia enough control back to kill Nijara.

Alex PJ 27: They think they’ve won but Parker arrives and fatally shoots Alex (P: capable, vindictive).

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Parker is the assassin!

Resolution

Alex PJ 28: Alex dies one minute AFTER the deadline, beating fate after all.

Celia TJ 10: Celia receives the Death Fortune and takes a vial of Alex’s blood to finish his mission (C: capable).

Nijara AJ 11: Nijara is reborn as a clone.

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Nijara thought she was a free human but is actually a clone created by the AI as its servant/slave.

Deeper Layer: Nijara starts to wonder if she’s on the wrong side.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s New Outline Beats!

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…to go over the plot with a fine toothed comb and work out the knots and problem areas. Still trying out a few things to see what works best, especially with Nijara and AI. My Act 2 is a bit beefy while Act 3 is a bit lean- pondering if this is a problem or not. I added Celia’s beats to keep things more organized.

Genre: Action / Sci-fi

ACT 1: Alex becomes a Fate Runner and receives the Death Fortune

Opening

Alex PJ 1: Opening scene of Alex as a child: his father has the Death Fortune and tries to kill himself along with his wife and Alex- Alex escapes but both his parents die. (Wound)

Genre Convention: Open with action

Deeper Layer: Alex was the one who caused his father to receive the Death Fortune

Alex PJ 2: 30 years later, Alex announces his secret project at a gala to free people from “Fate” (science/serum). His speech is not well-received.

Deeper Layer: Alex is driven by guilt to destroy Fate like it destroyed his family

Nijara AJ 1 (off screen): Nijara sends Alex the delayed fortune at the behest of the AI.

INCITING INCIDENT: During his speech, Alex receives a delayed fortune to destroy the experiment in the next 15 minutes!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (ticking clock)

Alex PJ 3: Alex tries to save the experiment which results in his assistant’s death and the experiment being destroyed anyway.

Deeper Layer: Guilt drives Alex to not give up on his goal even when it’s illogical/dangerous.

Celia TJ 1: Celia arrives to the scene in a cop car to interrogate Alex (off the books) and discover what happened.

Alex PJ 4: They argue about his obsession.

Alex PJ 5: Alex goes home alone while Celia sleeps at the precinct.

Deeper Layer: Alex’s relentless obsession is driving them towards divorce, although neither will admit it yet.

TURNING POINT 1: Alex receives the Death Fortune!

ACT 2: Alex recruits Celia to help him escape death before time’s up.

Genre Convention: The hero must escape the inescapable

New Plan

Alex PJ 6: Alex takes public transport to the precinct to get Celia’s help.

Alex PJ 7: The transport malfunctions and almost kills him.

Nijara AJ 2: Nijara/AI tries to kill Alex via technology but it fails.

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (death is close!)

Celia TJ 2: Celia’s partner at the precinct, Parker, tries to convince her to leave Alex.

Secret: Parker is in love with Celia.

Alex PJ 8: Alex arrives and has a bit of a tiff with Parker.

Alex PJ 9: Alex asks Celia to protect him for the day.

Celia TJ 3: Celia takes Alex to the morgue to convince him that he can’t escape the Death Fortune by running. She tells him there might be another way: through the church.

Alex PJ 10: Alex agrees to use Celia’s church contact to try and petition the Fate Walker to change his fate.

Secret: Celia doesn’t tell Alex that her fortune is to kill him.

Plan in Action

Celia TJ 4: At the church, Celia requests an audience with the Fate Walker which is promptly denied by the priest.

Alex PJ 11: A church member slips Alex a secret message to meet up later.

Nijara AJ 3 (off screen): Nijara unleashes an assassin to kill Alex, since Celia hasn’t yet.

Hidden Identity: The assassin is Parker, Celia’s partner.

Alex PJ 12: Alex and Celia head to the Market where the message said to meet.

Alex PJ 13: The church member leads them to a secret room and tells them his suspicions about the Church.

Celia TJ 5: Celia realizes there’s a bomb and is able to save Alex before it goes off, but it mortally wounds the church member.

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (someone else is after Alex!)

Deeper Layer: Parker set the bomb but tried to call Celia to lead her away (missed call).

Celia TJ 6: Celia chases after the assassin but can’t catch him.

Alex PJ 14: Alex tries to save the dying church member and ends up getting key info on the Fate Walker (her location? How to find her?).

Alex PJ 15: Alex and Celia have to enlist Parker’s help to gain access to the Fate Walker (they have the location but need help getting there?)

Deeper Layer/Hidden Identity: Parker wants to kill Alex but can’t because of Celia’s presence. They don’t know he’s the assassin (and neither does the audience).

Nijara AJ 4 (off screen): Nijara gives Parker permission to help Alex and Celia meet her.

Deeper Layer: Nijara is planning to kill them herself!

Genre Convention: Antagonist who is clearly corrupt / malicious

Alex PJ 16: Alex and Celia meet Nijara and their conversation quickly escalates, resulting in Alex pulling a gun on Nijara and her revealing she is able to mind/band control them both (limited power/control though- make this clear and make sense).

Nijara AJ 5: Nijara reveals the truth about the AI to Alex and Celia.

Deeper Layer: Nijara believes she is a partner with the AI (deception on the part of the AI)

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Nijara and the AI are controlling people behind the scenes!

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Alex finds out Celia is fated to kill him!

TURNING POINT 2 – MIDPOINT: Alex discovers the truth about who Fate really is and Nijara accidentally reveals the missing piece for his serum (working on this part). Alex and Celia escape!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Act 3: Finish the serum before the data is lost forever.

Rethink Everything & New Plan

Alex PJ 17: Alex connects with his lead tech, Lila, in order to get access to his lab before incineration.

Nijara AJ 6: Nijara is reprimanded for letting someone leave with the knowledge of the AI. She raises the stakes for Parker to kill Alex: if he fails, he dies next.

Deeper Layer: The AI starts to consider Nijara as a weak link.

Deeper Layer: Nijara has never been scolded like this by the AI, as if she was a wayward child instead of a partner.

Alex PJ 18: Alex and Celia break into the lab with Lila’s help.

Alex PJ 19: Alex is almost done with the the serum as the incineration begins but Parker arrives to finish him off.

Celia TJ 7: Celia fights off Parker (not knowing it’s him) as the building burns while Alex finishes the serum.

Alex PJ 20: They barely escape with one vial of the serum.

Deeper Layer: In order to kill Alex, Parker has to kill Celia, and he can’t do it, which allows them time to escape.

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Nijara AJ 7: Nijara wants to kill Alex herself to prove she’s capable. The AI denies her request; instead, it sets the robots after Alex.

Alex PJ 21: The robots in the city turn hostile towards Alex, forcing him and Celia to go into hiding.

Alex PJ 22: With no way out and limited time left, Alex takes the serum.

Deeper Layer: He has to know if it worked (still obsessed, hasn’t quite changed yet). Also, he is at the end of his rope and thinks there’s no way out even though Celia does (all is lost?)

Alex PJ 23: The chemicals from the band interact badly with the serum and Alex starts to lose his mind.

Celia TJ 8: Celia cuts off his arm/hand with the band on it.

TURNING POINT 3: Alex doesn’t die revealing that his serum works! But there was only one vial: now Alex’s mind and blood hold the secret. If he dies, so does the chance of freedom.

Deeper Layer: Alex is vindicated but also starts to understand Celia’s sacrifice for him and realizes how much he loves for her.

ACT 4: Alex must get across the city to give his blood and instructions to Lila before Fate wins (time is almost up).

Alex PJ 24: Alex and Celia hijack a sky car to quickly get across the city as the robots close in.

Genre Convention: Escalating action (car chase!) and higher stakes (they have to save the whole city!)

Alex PJ 25: Alex and Celia split up in the middle of the chase in separate cars.

Climax

Nijara AJ 8: Nijara’s robots chase and take down Celia’s car, giving Alex a clean getaway.

Alex PJ 26: Alex crashes into the robots, destroying them, and saves Celia.

Transformational Journey: Putting himself and his goal in jeopardy to save someone he loves, from selfish ambition to selfless sacrifice.

Nijara AJ 9: Nijara arrives, defying the AI’s orders, and takes control of Celia. Orders her to kill Alex. Alex encourages Celia to do it.

Deeper Layer: Alex cares too much about Celia to let her die for him, even if it dooms the world. His arc is complete.

Celia TJ 9: Celia is able to fight the mind control and kills Nijara instead of Alex.

Nijara AJ 10: Nijara dies.

Deeper Layer: The AI knows Nijara is officially off the rails and undermines her power, giving Celia enough control back to kill Nijara.

Alex PJ 27: They think they’ve won but Parker arrives and fatally shoots Alex.

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Parker is the assassin!

Resolution

Alex PJ 28: Alex dies one minute AFTER the deadline, beating fate after all.

Celia TJ 10: Celia receives the Death Fortune and takes a vial of Alex’s blood to finish his mission.

Nijara AJ 11: Nijara is reborn as a clone.

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Nijara thought she was a free human but is actually a clone created by the AI as its servant/slave.

Deeper Layer: Nijara starts to wonder if she’s on the wrong side.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’ Beat Sheet – Draft 1

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how important it is to draft things out beat by beat. I am finding where my story “pain points” are and what I need to work on to smooth things out.

Genre: Action / Sci-fi

ACT 1: Alex becomes a Fate Runner and receives the Death Fortune

Opening

Alex PJ 1: Opening scene of Alex as a child: his father has the Death Fortune and tries to kill himself along with his wife and Alex- Alex escapes but both his parents die. (Wound)

Genre Convention: Open with action

Deeper Layer: Alex was the one who caused his father to receive the Death Fortune and “go crazy”

Alex PJ 2: 30 years later, Alex announces his secret project at a gala: he is creating a serum to free them from “gift of Fate” medical bands that keep them alive but also keep them as “slaves” (his belief). His speech is not well-received and he comes off as obsessed/desperate.

Deeper Layer: Alex is driven by guilt to destroy Fate like it destroyed his family (revenge/justice).

Nijara AJ 1/Deeper Layer (off screen): Nijara sends Alex the delayed fortune at the behest of Fate, concerned about what this serum could do.

INCITING INCIDENT: During his speech, Alex receives a delayed fortune to destroy the experiment in the next 15 minutes!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (ticking clock)

Alex PJ 3: Alex chooses to try to save the experiment which results in his assistant’s death and the experiment being destroyed anyway.

Deeper Layer: Guilt drives Alex to not give up on his goal even when it’s illogical/dangerous.

TURNING POINT 1: Alex receives the Death Fortune!

ACT 2: Alex recruits his semi-estranged wife, Celia, to help him escape death before time’s up.

Genre Convention: The hero must escape the inescapable

New Plan

Alex PJ 4: Alex heads to the precinct to recruit Celia to help him.

Nijara AJ 2: Nijara tries to kill Alex (elevators/transport) but he uses his wits to survive.

Alex PJ 5: Alex asks Celia to protect him for the day, she counters that no one can escape the Death Fortune. But she has a contact at the Church and maybe they can petition the Fate Walker to change his fortune IF he abandons his obsession.

Deception: Alex lies to Celia by agreeing to her terms without intending to follow through.

Secret: Celia’s fortune is to kill Alex, which she hides from him. She’s going to keep her promise to help him even if he doesn’t keep his.

Deeper Layer: Alex’s relentless obsession has been driving them towards divorce, although neither will admit it yet.

Plan in Action

Alex PJ 6: Alex and Celia head to the Church to request an audience with the Fate Walker. It’s denied, but a church member slips Alex a secret message to meet up later.

Nijara AJ 3: Nijara unleashes a mysterious assassin to make sure Alex dies as soon as possible.

Hidden Identity: The assassin is Parker, Celia’s partner at the precinct.

Secret: Parker is in love with Celia.

Alex PJ 7: Alex and Celia meet up with the church member in secret, who tells them his suspicions about the Church and the Fate Walker. A bomb goes off but Celia is able to save herself and Alex, while the church member dies.

Genre Convention: Escalating action, higher stakes (someone’s after Alex!)

Deeper Layer: Parker tries to lead Celia away (phone call) before detonation but the call doesn’t go through. She and Alex survive regardless.

Alex PJ 8: Alex and Celia enlist Parker’s help to gain access to where the Fate Walker is since the church member died before telling them (or he told them before dying, but they need help accessing).

Deeper Layer/Hidden Identity: Parker wants to kill Alex but can’t because of Celia’s presence. They don’t know he’s the assassin!

Nijara AJ 4: Parker communicates with Nijara, who gives him permission to help Alex and Celia find/meet her. (This may be off-screen, depending on if I want the audience to know it’s Parker yet- not sure)

Deeper Layer: Nijara is planning to kill them both!

Genre Convention: Antagonist who is clearly corrupt / malicious

Alex PJ 9: Alex and Celia meet Nijara. Their conversation quickly escalates, resulting in Alex pulling a gun on Nijara and her revealing she is able to mind/band control them both (limited power/control though- make this clear and make sense).

Nijara AJ 5: Nijara reveals the truth about the AI to Alex and Celia once she has them in her power.

Deeper Layer: Nijara believes she is a partner with the AI (deception on the part of the AI)

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Nijara and the AI are controlling people behind the scenes!

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Alex finds out Celia is fated to kill him!

TURNING POINT 2 – MIDPOINT: Alex discovers the truth about who Fate really is and Nijara accidentally reveals the missing piece for his serum (working on this part). Alex and Celia escape!

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Rethink Everything & New Plan

Alex PJ 10: Alex needs to break into his lab, which is scheduled for incineration, to finish the serum before all his data is lost. They recruit his lead tech, Lila, who helps get them access.

Nijara AJ 6: Nijara is severely reprimanded for letting someone leave with the knowledge of the AI. She raises the stakes for Parker to kill Alex: if he fails, he dies next.

Deeper Layer: Nijara has never been scolded like this by the AI, as if she was a wayward child.

Alex PJ 11: Alex finishes the serum right as the incineration begins and Parker arrives to finish him off, creating multiple dangers. Celia is able to grab the serum before it’s destroyed and they escape.

Deeper Layer: In order to kill Alex, Parker has to kill Celia, and he can’t do it, which allows them time to escape.

Genre Convention: Demand for action (fighting/escaping/running)

Nijara AJ 7: Nijara is ordered to go herself and make sure Alex dies or she’ll lose her position as AI’s confidant/hands and feet. (Something to this effect- stakes for her).

Alex PJ 12: The robots in the city all turn hostile towards Alex, forcing him and Celia to go into hiding. With no way out, Alex takes the serum.

Deeper Layer: He has to know if it worked (still obsessed, hasn’t quite changed yet).

Alex PJ 13: The chemicals from the band interact badly with the serum and Alex starts to lose his mind. Celia cuts off his arm/hand with the band on it, although that action may also kill him.

TURNING POINT 3: Alex doesn’t die revealing that his serum works! But there was only one vial: now Alex’s mind and blood hold the secret. If he dies, so does the chance of freedom.

ACT 3: Alex must get across the city to give his blood and instructions to Lila before Fate wins (time is almost up).

Alex PJ 14: Alex and Celia hijack a sky car to quickly get across the city although the robots are closing in.

Genre Convention: Escalating action (car chase!) and higher stakes (they have to save the whole city!)

Alex PJ 15: Alex and Celia split up in the middle of the chase in separate cars; since Alex’s band is off, he can’t be tracked and Celia can distract.

Climax

Nijara AJ 8: Nijara’s robots chase and takes down Celia’s car giving Alex a clean getaway.

Alex PJ 16: Alex can’t leave Celia behind so he crashes his car, taking out the robots but wounding himself. Both Celia and Alex are injured and vulnerable.

Transformational Journey: Putting himself and his goal in jeopardy to save someone he loves, from selfish ambition to selfless sacrifice.

Nijara AJ 9: Nijara arrives, takes control of Celia and orders her to kill Alex. Alex encourages her to do it.

Deeper Layer: Alex cares too much about Celia to let her die for him, even if it dooms the world. His arc is complete.

Alex (Celia) PJ 17: Celia is able to fight the mind control (working on how/specifics) and kills Nijara instead of Alex.

Alex PJ 18: They think they’ve won but Parker arrives and fatally shoots Alex.

DEEPER LAYER REVEAL: Parker is the assassin! (Reveal for Celia, possibly audience- not sure yet)

Alex PJ 19: Alex dies one minute AFTER the deadline, beating fate after all. Celia receives the Death Fortune and takes a vial of Alex’s blood: she will finish his mission and free everyone.

Nijara AJ 10: Nijara is reborn as a clone, revealing that she is more of a slave than anyone else. Her AI master wants to “ramp things up.”

Deeper Layer: Nijara starts to wonder if she’s on the wrong side.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Deeper Layer!

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to add deeper meaning and focus on what’s really important in the story. It’s helping me reset some former ideas and streamline how the world works, what the true threat is and how it impacts the plot more clearly. Really helpful!

…

Surface Layer: Alex has 24 hours to escape the death fortune issued by the god Fate via the church.

Deeper Layer: The church is a false religion that control peoples via AI but the only one who knows it is Nijara, the Fate Walker.

Major Reveal: When Alex and Celia meet Nijara, Alex forces her to reveal the truth behind the curtain and she unknowingly gives him the key to set people free from “Fate’s” control.

Influences Surface Story: Alex’s first fortune to destroy the experiment, the death fortune, an assassin, and Celia’s fortune to kill him are all out of the AI’s self-preservation, to destroy a threat. A church priest wants to help Alex because they suspect there’s something deeper at work in the church.

Hints: Technology fails around Alex causing him to be in mortal danger (AI at work). Other people receive strange fortunes or delayed ones to “make sure things happen the way they’re supposed to.” The medical bands are a “gift from Fate” that help keep people alive though no one understands how they work (thus Alex’s experiments).

Changes Reality: That nothing is divinely fated but people are being controlled and “herded along” by a computer system “for their betterment.” Even Nijara is not free but merely a puppet of the system.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Character Structure

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…making sure the protagonist’s and antagonist’s journeys intertwine and affect each other. It was hard to create a structure for my antagonist but helpful to know what she’s working on in the moments we don’t see her on screen. Still working on the world-building and my triangle character.

Protagonist: Alex

• Beginning: Alex is attempting to create a serum that will free the people from the required “medical bands” they all wear 24/7 as he thinks they’re connected to fate/fortunes.
• Inciting Incident: Alex receives a delayed fortune to destroy the serum and refuses to do so, although the serum is destroyed anyway.
• Turning Point 1: Because of his actions earlier, he receives the death fortune and will die within 24 hours.
• Act 2: Alex enlists the help of his wife Celia to help him find the Fate Walker who can petition Fate on his behalf and potentially get rid of the death fortune.
• Turning Point 2 / Midpoint: Alex meets the Fate Walker, Nijara, and she reveals the truth behind the curtain, and he now knows for sure the serum he was creating will work and how to finish it- if he can do it in time.
• Act 3: Alex breaks into his lab to try to salvage the data before the lab is incinerated.
• Turning Point 3: Alex is able to create one vial of the serum and injects it in himself. Celia has to cut the band off his arm and he survives- meaning it worked! But now his blood holds the secret.
• Act 4 Climax: Nijara and her robots chase Alex and Celia through the city as the clock counts down to 6AM (the 24 hour mark).
• Resolution: Alex is killed but Celia has one vial of his blood.

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Antagonist: Nijara

• Beginning: Nijara works with the AI to control the population of the city. She runs the church and calls herself Fate Walker and Fate “god” although she alone knows the truth.
• Inciting Incident: She receives an alert that Alex is working to remove the medical bands which will dismantle their control. She sends for it to be destroyed, which it is, but not by Alex as he was supposed to.
• Turning Point 1: She sends Alex the death fortune but the AI reprimands her that too many people are “running from their fate” and there’s a population deficit. They need more control and the church isn’t doing enough.
• Act 2: Nijara runs a marketing campaign for the church to remind people of their duty while working to strengthen the band’s power over people’s minds (it’s limited- working on this angle).
• Turning Point 2 / Midpoint: Alex and Celia damage Nijara’s new band that can take full control over people (a work in progress) and they escape alive with the knowledge that that it’s a false religion.
• Act 3: Nijara struggles to fix the band in order to regain this new control over people.
• Turning Point 3: Nijara receives the order to kill Alex herself or SHE will die.
• Act 4 Climax: Nijara pins Alex down but she is killed by Celia.
• Resolution: Nijara is reborn as a clone, realizing she’s just a slave like the rest of the population.

</div>

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Supporting Characters

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how important it is to make sure all the characters are valuable and have a purpose, even if they’re only in a few scenes. I’m still pondering if I need to add more supporting characters.

Supporting Characters: Parker, Lila, Jo, Mikhail

Background Characters: Lab Techs, Cops, Robots, Gala Guests, Pedestrians, Alex’s Parents (intro), Church Attendants/Workers, Vendors, Shop Owners

Support 1

Name: Parker

Role: Cop, Celia’s partner at the precinct

Main purpose: He is a sounding board for Celia, helps her with transportation to the Fate Walker, and kills Alex in the end.

Value: He helps Celia out, as her friend and partner, while trying to pit her against Alex causing tension in their marriage. He adds stakes as the assassin who is after Alex, although we don’t know it’s him until the end.

Support 2:

Name: Lila

Role: Lead scientist, Alex’s right hand tech

Main purpose: She is the expert Alex consults regarding the serum throughout and lends her aid when they need help.

Value: She offers exposition regarding the science and is the one who helps them access the lab before it’s incinerated. At the very end, they have to get the information about the serum safely to her, in order to mass produce it.

Support 3:

Name: Jo

Role: Alex’s assistant

Main purpose: She is a sounding board for Alex in the beginning; he has to chose between saving her life and saving the serum, and he choses the serum.

Value: She helps set up the world with exposition in the beginning and her death shows how far Alex is willing to go for his goal, setting up his arc.

Support 4:

Name: Mikhail

Role: Works for the church

Main purpose: He tells Alex and Celia where to find the Fate Walker and sets up more of the mystery around the church and who is behind everything.

Value: He adds mystery and assists with exposition about how the church works and who the Fate Walker is; his death adds tension and stakes as we see someone else die who has the death fortune by the hands of a mysterious assassin.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 10 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Character Profiles Part 2

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…adding more layers continues to reveal more depth and subtext that I didn’t see before. Still working everything out, but excited for what I’m discovering about my characters even now!

ALEX

The High Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

This Character’s Journey: From doing everything he can to avoid the death fortune to giving up his life to save Celia; during the course of the journey, he discovers the secret to destroying the fate system.

The Actor Attractors for this character: He’s the one driving the story with death looming over him; he’s a smart scientist who has to use his wits to stay alive with plenty of subtext of guilt mixed with ambition and a great arc of self-sacrifice.

• Role in the Story: Protagonist, the scientist on a verge of a world-changing breakthrough who receives the death fortune and is racing time to finish his work.
• Age Range: Late 30’s
• Description: Alex wears a charcoal suit shockingly unwrinkled, somehow, although his mussed hair and three day stubble reveal it probably should be. He’s an intense man with a quick wit and a tendency to ignore advice he doesn’t like.
• Core Traits: Determined, Stubborn, Book Smart, Quick Witted
• Want: To survive the day and finish the serum at any cost
• Need: To forgive himself
• Wound: He was responsible for his father receiving the death fortune, which resulted in both of his parents deaths when he was a kid.
• Likability: He’s witty, smart, pursuing a beneficial goal for everyone, and his colleagues like, or at least admire, him.
• Relatability: He’s pouring his heart, soul and money into his passion and a goal that’s bigger than himself but the endless work is wearing him down and affecting his relationships/judgements.
• Empathy: He experienced deep trauma by losing both of his parents in the opening scene and that’s what is fueling him to “change the world,” although it’s still an unhealed wound and affects him throughout the story.
• Character Subtext: He’s withholding because of his wound- afraid he’s going to be the one who kills Celia, just like his parents, so he pushes her away.
• Character Intrigue: Unspoken wound of being responsible for his parent’s death
• Flaw: Poor decision making because he’s so stubbornly focused on his goal
• Values: His Work, Proving Himself, Success
• Character Dilemma: Achieving success and being a good person/husband

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CELIA

The High Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

This Character’s Journey: From trying to fix the situation and save Alex to letting him go.

The Actor Attractors for this character: She’s a capable cop in a futuristic world, a warrior who protects the man instead of being protected by one; at the same time, she’s drowning under the weight of trying to be strong all the while hiding her own secrets.

• Role in the Story: Triangle Character, a bad-ass cop who carries the world on her shoulders and tries to help Alex survive while knowing she’s the one who is fated to kill him.
• Age Range: Late 30’s
• Description: Celia walks with firm resolution in each step. Her pristine black uniform hugs her body like it was made for her while the gun on her hip means business, although her eyes reveal an anxiety she’s trying her damndest to hide.
• Core Traits: Capable, Selfless, Street Smart, Controlling
• Want: To be the savior for everyone
• Need: To ask for help
• Wound: She had a rough childhood as an orphan (it’s what brought her and Alex together in the first place) and feels like others lives are more important and worthier than her own.
• Likability: She’s capable, selfless, a woman of integrity, and puts others first
• Relatability: She’s trying to fix Alex and their marriage while also trying to save both of their lives, but it’s too much for her to carry alone.
• Empathy: She’s fighting for their marriage while Alex pushes her away, even if he doesn’t realize it. She keeps trying to save him knowing it’s going to cost her her own life, in the end.
• Character Subtext: She’s afraid to ask for help because she needs to do it all on her own, just like when she was growing up as an orphan
• Character Intrigue: Her secret is she’s the one who is fated to kill Alex
• Flaw: Overdoing things and putting too much on her plate
• Values: Duty, People’s lives, Protecting others
• Character Dilemma: Taking control versus trusting others

</div><div>

NIJARA

The High Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

This Character’s Journey: From pretending to be a prophet while working with a dangerous AI to discovering she’s a clone and not free at all.

The Actor Attractors for this character: She’s plays a unique role in this world as Fate Walker, both prophet and computer tech with loads of subtext as she juggles conspiracies with secrets and deception, all while the truth of who she actually is is withheld from her.

• Role in the Story: Antagonist, the leader of the church who is secretly working with an AI to control people via the fate system.
• Age Range: 40’s
• Description: Tall with sharp features and a cold gaze, any remnants of warmth hidden deep beneath the surface. She wears humble robes of the church but they don’t look quite right on her proud, ramrod straight body.
• Core Traits: Intelligent, Cold, Calculating, Proud
• Want: To control the world and please her boss
• Need: To be free
• Wound: I’m not sure yet, but she discovers she’s a clone and that all her real memories are fake
• Likability: Highly intelligent and cultured, sought after and respected by others.
• Relatability: She thinks she’s doing the right thing and what’s best for people, believing in her goals even though they are wrong.
• Empathy: At the very end, she discovers she’s been lied to and is actually a clone with no free will of her own- trapped in the system just like Alex and Celia.
• Character Subtext: Lying, pretending to be a prophet for the church when she’s in fact a computer tech and working with the AI.
• Character Intrigue: Conspiracy, she knows it’s a false religion and is working with the AI behind the scenes to help control people.
• Flaw: Pride that leads to over-confidence
• Values: Control, Order, Approval from her “boss”
• Character Dilemma: Maintaining order verses wanting her own freedom which brings chaos.

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[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Character Profiles Part 1

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to intentionally break down each of my leads into pieces and build them back up so that they become well rounded and three dimensional.

ALEX

The High Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

This Character’s Journey: From doing everything he can to avoid the death fortune to giving up his life to save Celia; during the course of the journey, he discovers the secret to destroying the fate system.

The Actor Attractors for this character: He’s the one driving the story with death looming over him; he’s a smart scientist who has to use his wits to stay alive with plenty of subtext of guilt mixed with ambition and a great arc of self-sacrifice.

• Role in the Story: Protagonist, the scientist on a verge of a world-changing breakthrough who receives the death fortune and is racing time to finish his work.
• Age Range: Late 30’s
• Description: Alex wears a charcoal suit that’s shockingly unwrinkled, somehow, although his mussed hair and three day stubble reveal it probably should be. He’s an intense man with a quick wit and a tendency to ignore advice he doesn’t like.
• Core Traits: Determined, Stubborn, Book Smart, Quick Witted
• Want: To survive the day and finish the serum at any cost
• Need: To forgive himself
• Wound: He was responsible for his father receiving the death fortune, which resulted in both of his parents deaths when he was a kid.
• Likability: He’s witty, smart, pursuing a beneficial goal for everyone, and his colleagues like, or at least admire, him.
• Relatability: He’s pouring his heart, soul and money into his passion and a goal that’s bigger than himself but the endless work is wearing him down and affecting his relationships/judgements.
• Empathy: He experienced deep trauma by losing both of his parents in the opening scene and that’s what is fueling him to “change the world,” although it’s still an unhealed wound and affects him throughout the story.

CELIA

The High Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

This Character’s Journey: From trying to fix the situation and save Alex to letting him go.

The Actor Attractors for this character: She’s a capable cop in a futuristic world, a warrior who protects the man instead of being protected by one; at the same time, she’s drowning under the weight of trying to be strong all the while hiding her own secrets.

• Role in the Story: Triangle Character, a bad-ass cop who carries the world on her shoulders and tries to help Alex survive while knowing she’s the one who is fated to kill him.
• Age Range: Late 30’s
• Description: Celia walks with firm resolution in each step. Her pristine black uniform hugs her body like it was made for her while the gun on her hip means business, although her eyes reveal an anxiety she’s trying her damndest to hide.
• Core Traits: Capable, Selfless, Street Smart, Controlling
• Want: To be the savior for everyone
• Need: To ask for help
• Wound: She had a rough childhood as an orphan (it’s what brought her and Alex together in the first place) and feels like others lives are more important and worthier than her own.
• Likability: She’s capable, selfless, a woman of integrity, and puts others first
• Relatability: She’s trying to fix Alex and their marriage while also trying to save both of their lives, but it’s too much for her to carry alone.
• Empathy: She’s fighting for their marriage while Alex pushes her away, even if he doesn’t realize it. She keeps trying to save him knowing it’s going to cost her her own life, in the end.

NIJARA

The High Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

This Character’s Journey: From pretending to be a prophet while working with a dangerous AI to discovering she’s a clone and not free at all.

The Actor Attractors for this character: She’s plays a unique role in this world as Fate Walker, both prophet and computer tech with loads of subtext as she juggles conspiracies with secrets and deception, all while the truth of who she actually is is withheld from her.

• Role in the Story: Antagonist, the leader of the church who is secretly working with an AI to control people via the fate system.
• Age Range: 40’s
• Description: Tall with sharp features and a cold gaze, any remnants of warmth hidden deep beneath the surface. She wears humble robes of the church but they don’t look quite right on her proud, ramrod straight body.
• Core Traits: Intelligent, Cold, Calculating, Proud
• Want: To control the world and please her “boss”
• Need: To be free
• Wound: I’m not sure yet, but she discovers she’s a clone and that all her real memories are fake.
• Likability: Highly intelligent and cultured, sought after and respected by others.
• Relatability: She thinks she’s doing the right thing and what’s best for people, believing in her goals even though they are wrong.
• Empathy: At the very end, she discovers she’s been lied to and is actually a clone with no free will of her own- trapped in the system just like Alex and Celia.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Likability/Relatability/Empathy

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…making sure I’m adding these important layers in to create characters that people can connect with and understand, even for my main antagonist who at first was purely a villain.

Protagonist: Alex

Likability: He’s witty, smart, pursuing a beneficial goal for everyone and his colleagues like/admire him.

Relatability: He’s pouring his heart, soul and money into his passion and a goal that’s bigger than himself but the endless work is wearing him down and affecting his relationships/judgements.

Empathy: He experienced deep trauma by losing both of his parents in the opening scene and that’s what is fueling him to “change the world,” though it’s still an unhealed wound and affects him throughout the story.

Antagonist: Nijara

Likability: Highly intelligent and cultured, sought after and respected by others.

Relatability: She thinks she’s doing the right thing and what’s best for people, believing in her goals even though they are wrong.

Empathy: At the very end, she discovers she’s been lied to and is actually a clone with no free will of her own- trapped in the system just like Alex and Celia.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Character Intrigue

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how fun it is to brainstorm and discover details about my characters, especially my antagonist(s) and their motivations/secrets. This has been a very helpful process to add deeper layers to my story! Still mulling over my two leads and if there are any more layers to add at this point.

Character Name: Alex

Role: Protagonist

Unspoken Wound: As a kid, he was responsible for his father receiving the death fortune, and therefore the death of both of his parents.

How could this show up? It drives/motivates him to achieve his goal beyond what is healthy (guilt) and complicates his relationships throughout, especially with Celia because he’s never told her (he does towards the end). It affects his judgement, adding tension and putting them in increasingly difficult situations.

Character Name: Celia

Role: Triangle Character

Secrets: She received a fortune to kill Alex but is hiding it from him.

How could this show up? Every conversation/interaction with Alex has the underlying knowledge that she might be the one to kill him. Even though she’s helping him survive, deep down she knows the end is coming; and if she runs from her role, she’ll die next.

Character Name: Nijara

Role: Antagonist

Conspiracies: She knows it’s a false religion and is working with the AI behind the scenes to help control people

Deception: She pretends she’s a prophet, when in reality she’s a high-level computer programmer and tech

Secret Identity: She doesn’t know she’s actually a clone that’s been created by the AI and therefore has no free will of her own.

How could this show up? In her conversations with Alex and Celia, acting “holy” and talking a certain way, all the while knowing what’s really going on. Everything she does she believes is as a partner to the AI, not knowing she’s really a slave (reveal is at the very end).

Character Name: Parker

Role: Secondary antagonist/fake ally

Hidden agendas: He also received orders to make sure Alex dies.

Secrets: He has fallen for Celia through their work at the precinct together, therefore he has an underlying motivation to see Alex permanently out of the picture.

Secret Identity: He works for the church to make sure death fortunes come true, no matter what.

How could this show up? He pushes Celia towards leaving Alex, butts heads with Alex when he comes to the precinct for Celia’s help and throughout, and is the one who kills Alex in the end.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Subtext Characters

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how important it is to really know your characters at a deep level as it will elevate every scene they’re in. I’m still working out the details but this was a helpful, more in-depth pass on both my leads.

Movie Title: Edge of Tomorrow <div>

Character Name: William Cage (Tom Cruise)

Subtext Identity: A PR con man who wears an officer’s uniform but is a coward

Subtext Trait: Con man, coward

Subtext Logline: Cage is an Army con man falling in love with a warrior who would never fall for a coward

Possible Areas of Subtext: Tries to blackmail and con people to weasel out of his duty. Tries to avoid combat at the midpoint to save Rita but she figures it out. Does a mission by himself to protect Rita and almost dies. Tries to hide his feelings for her throughout. Keeps trying to save/protect Rita when he should be focused on the mission.

…

Character Name: Alex

Subtext Identity: The CEO/boss of a lab whose laser-focused ambition is motivated by guilt

Subtext Trait: Driven by guilt, ambitious

Subtext Logline: Alex has a guilt wound related to his parents traumatic deaths and believes he has to achieve his breakthrough to pay for his guilt; when triggered, he becomes selfish and defensive

Possible Areas of Subtext: Keeps putting his goals above others needs, won’t listen to Celia’s directions because he is so narrowly focused on his own end game, puts people in danger without realizing it, pushes Celia away when he shouldn’t.

Character Name: Celia

Subtext Identity: The advocate cop who thinks she can save everyone if she tries hard enough

Subtext Trait: Carries the world on her shoulders, takes charge

Subtext Logline: Celia is a cop who has to fix everyone’s problems; when triggered, she becomes controlling and refuses to ask for help.

Possible Areas of Subtext: Thinks she can take care of everyone’s problems, she wants to control Alex to protect him, she puts herself in harm’s way unnecessarily, has trouble asking for help, thinks she can change him and make their issues go away by her own sheer will.

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[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Actor Attractors!

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to start thinking of Alex and Celia’s uniqueness and their differences to make them really stand out as lead characters – what makes them work and what their arcs are. I have a pretty good idea of Alex’s journey but still working on Celia’s.

Lead Character Name: Alex

Role: Protagonist

1. What about this role would cause an actor to want to be known for it? <div>

-He’s an ambitious scientist who wants to destroy the fate system because of past trauma and has a great arc of learning what’s most important in life.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in your story?

– He’s the one driving the story, the one who receives the death fortune and is literally running from death- with few combat skills, he has to use his mind and wits more than fists.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in the script?

– In the first meeting with the antagonist, he uses his skills to manipulate her and figure out what he needs for his serum; outsmarting her and giving Celia an opening to get them out of trouble.

4. How can you introduce this role in a way that could sell it to an actor?

– He races a car like a drunk man through the city, but when we meet him, he’s far from drunk- he’s well dressed and simply very late for a gala (mini twist).

5. What could be this character’s emotional range?

– From narrow-minded and dangerously ambitious to caring and trusting others, even learning to love again. From fear to courage. From despair to hope.

6. What subtext can the actor play?

– Being afraid of failure and of dying before he achieves his goal; that fear is underneath every choice he makes for the first half until he starts to change.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character can have?

– His relationship with Celia; they start out distant and semi-estranged but by working together under pressure they learn to trust, respect and love each other again.

8. How will this character’s unique voice be presented?

– Being book smart and a scientist, he’s a little more pretentious in his speech and how he talks to people. He’s also cynical and a realist, which comes through in his sense of humor.

9. What could make this character special and unique?

– The fact that he is always in physical danger but can’t defend himself with guns and fists- he has to use his wits.

Lead Character Name: Celia

Role: Triangle Character

1. What about this role would cause an actor to want to be known for it? </div>

– She’s a bad ass cop in a futuristic world who has to constantly get Alex out of trouble, complicating her life, but also gives her an arc of softening.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in your story?

– She’s street smart and great in a fight, the bodyguard who is the one protecting the man, but she’s also vulnerable and wants more from him. She’s the brute force with a soft heart.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead could take in the script?

– At the end of the story, she has to fight mind control in order to not kill Alex but kill the antagonist instead, potentially giving up her life for his despite him telling her not to.

4. How can you introduce this role in a way that could sell it to an actor?

– She shows up in uniform in a cop car, with her awesome guns and cool style, but she’s worried- which shows vulnerability beneath the cool. She also takes charge of Alex’s care right away and is gentle with him, even when he’s not gentle back.

5. What could be this character’s emotional range?

– From frustration and anger at Alex’s narrow mindedness to growing compassion as she learns to love him again. From distrust to trust, from fear of losing the people she loves to anger at the enemy to determination to see Alex’s goal through to the end.

6. What subtext can the actor play?

– She is hiding her fortune from Alex, that she’s supposed to kill him, for a good chunk of the story and also her true feelings as they haven’t been honest with each other in a long time.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character can have?

– Her broken marriage to Alex and how it is slowly being put back together again under intense pressure.

8. How will this character’s unique voice be presented?

– She’s a fighter and a lover in one: calm and collected under pressure but also feels deeply and is a woman of faith who hopes despite hopeless situations. She helps keep Alex going.

9. What could make this character special and unique?

– She’s a warrior who protects the man instead of being protected by one; at the same time, she stays feminine and is able to be vulnerable.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Actor Attractors for Edge of Tomorrow

One Sentence Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…paying attention to the lead characters in major movies and how they’re built, from their general introduction to the first line the character says to their specific actions and arc, etc. It’s super helpful to know how to get the attention of big actors!

Movie Title: Edge of Tomorrow (Sci-fi/Action)

Lead Character Name: William Cage (Tom Cruise)

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role? Cage has a great character arc of a coward becoming a hero, set in the unique backdrop of a future alien war- a blockbuster sci-fi with heart, and Cage is the one who has to make most of the major decisions since he holds the power of resetting time.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the movie? His growth as a character in both learning courage and developing skills to be the most bad ass of them all. He has the most to learn in a “fish out of water” scenario but it makes him the most interesting and his journey the one you root for.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie? He is the one who is living every single day so he has to be the default leader, making the key decisions and the one everyone listens to. He’s the one who has to convince everyone of the truth and he’s the one who kills the big bad enemy in the end.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor? He’s a unique character, an Army PR guy who is all smooth talking until the pressure is on. He’s introduced on TV first as the face of the Army, then we quickly see who he really is which is an unexpected twist- a Major with no military experience.

5. What is this character’s emotional range? From cowardice to courage, from fear to bravery, from trying to run from everything to being the one who runs into battle first and gets others to follow. He has sorrow when Rita dies, and some quiet moments of discovering his feelings for her, and then the triumph of victory and love.

6. What subtext can the actor play? He has to reveal and hide certain things from characters all throughout- every time he meets every character, he has to reset and act differently, because he knows things they don’t know he knows, even with Rita when he knows she’s going to die and doesn’t want to tell her. It keeps all the relationships interesting throughout.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has? His relationship with Rita, the warrior, the opposite of him at the beginning but by the end they are soldiers who care deeply for each other and would die for each other.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented? How he’s so out of his element in the Army and combat situations, even though he’s supposed to know what he’s doing. He doesn’t know terms, he doesn’t even know how to use the mech suits he’s been pitching to the masses. Once he lives the day enough, his confidence grows and he knows what’s he’s doing.

9. What makes this character special and unique? His arc is great from coward to hero- polar opposites- and the fact that he’s a Major with no combat knowledge keeps him entertaining to watch in those environments. Seeing him win in the end is all the more satisfying because he has grown so much as a character.

10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.) The third act climax sequence, where he is now the war hero people follow and he saves Rita (at first), get the girl (the kiss!), and even though they both sacrifice themselves at the very end, you’ve gotta love knowing this is the guy who was called a deserter and now he’s the one who’s willing to die to save the world. It’s great!

Lead Character Name: Rita Vrataski (Emily Blunt)

1. Why would an actor WANT to be known for this role? She’s a bad ass war hero who is also feminine; strong but not trying to act like a man. Female war hero is a tantalizing role for women wanting to make a splash in the action genre.

2. What makes this character one of the most interesting characters in the movie? She’s introduced slowly with people talking about her, her photo on buses, and her reputation. When we finally meet her, we have high expectations and she’s written so well that she exceeds the expectations. Throughout the movie she’s brave, making good decisions, not perfect but self-less and will do anything to defeat the enemy. Even though she’s cold at first, she warms up.

3. What are the most interesting actions the Lead takes in the movie? Trusting Cage when no one else will and helping train him; she’s the one who knows it all training the newbie and it’s a great mentor role. She also pushes Cage in ways he needs to be pushed.

4. How is this character introduced that could sell it to an actor? The slow build and then great reveal on the battlefield when she is kicking ass, and then the early scene where she walks away from Cage, stealing his battery and letting him die. It’s another twist- you think she’ll try to save him, but she leaves him there- her mission is bigger than one life and she’s consistent throughout in that.

5. What is this character’s emotional range? From cold and aloof to vulnerable, but there’s so much under the surface. We don’t get much of her backstory, but she feels real and warms up to Cage as she gets to know him throughout each day. She goes from doubting him, annoyed at him, to liking him, admiring him, and giving her life for him.

6. What subtext can the actor play? She’s a very reserved character who doesn’t give much; she’s doing a mission and stuffs her emotions under the surface, but they come out in little moments. She feels real, even when she’s not talking- in a look or a reaction to Cage. Lots goes unsaid but felt with her and it shows.

7. What’s the most interesting relationships this character has? With Cage, the cowardly newbie she has to train and convince to save the world. They are polar opposites at the start, but by the end are partners who care for each other.

8. How is this character’s unique voice presented? She’s aloof and blunt, no sugar coating but to the point. She’s a soldier and a war hero and it shows in how she reacts to events- with calmness and courage.

9. What makes this character special and unique? The fact that she’s a bad ass war hero but also willing to trust this new guy and help him, at first for her own goals of winning the war, but she learns to trust him. She’s super cool without trying to be cool.

10. (Fill in a scene that shows the character fulfilling much of the Actor Attractor model.) One of the first scenes with her on the battlefield when Cage is fumbling around and she appears, kicking butt and killing aliens. Then Cage gets mortally wounded and she walks up to him, takes his battery pack, and leaves him to die. It’s such a surprise and the first real interaction between the two of them. It’s a great introduction to their relationship especially knowing how it ends.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Genre Conventions

Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how to choose between two genres and elevate with stronger conventions, making sure it delivers. It’s also fun to brainstorm bigger set pieces, even if they don’t end up making it in.

Title: Fate Runners

Genre: Action (sub genre is sci-fi)

Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

List of Conventions

Purpose (Adrenaline-stirring / fast paced): Alex keeps having brushes with death; he and Celia must constantly stay one step of ahead while pursuing their mission of keeping Alex alive while he finishes his experiment.

Demand for Action: Alex can’t roll over and die- he has a goal that requires him to constantly be in motion and enlist the help of others who raise the stakes (the more people are involved, the greater potential collateral damage).

Mission: The Hero must escape the inescapable (fated death).

Escalating Action: Things keep getting more intense as they discover more truths about the world and it gets harder for Alex to stay alive.

Hero: Alex is a highly capable and skilled scientists who is smart/clever; he uses his mind more than his fists. Celia is the bad ass cop/bodyguard with the cool guns.

Antagonist: Nijara is the one who seems to be pulling the strings of fate, thus the one who dictates if Alex dies or not. If they can defeat her, maybe they defeat fate itself (although it’s revealed she’s not the true villain). She is corrupt because she believes in a corrupt religion that controls people. There are also stakes for Nijara if she fails.

Act 1:

Opening: A desperate man drags his wife and young son to the top of a building in a cyber city- cops chase him. He has received the death fortune and is going to take his family with him to “take control of their fate”- the young boy escapes just as the man and wife topple from the building before the cops can stop them. The boy is a young Alex. We cut to an older Alex thirty years later who is late to announce his big breakthrough at a gala held at his lab. <div>

Inciting Incident: Alex receives a delayed fortune telling him to destroy the serum he’s created. He chooses to save his experiment over his assistant’s life, but to no avail- the serum is apparently destroyed in an explosion and his assistant is killed.

Turning Point: Alex receives the DEATH FORTUNE and he has his first brush with death as the escalator/elevator at his building breaks with him on it- he uses his wits to escape, but just barely.

Act 2:

New plan: On high alert for dangers, Alex convinces Celia, his estranged wife and a cop, to help him track down the Fate Walker in order to escape the death fortune and have time to finish his project, not knowing that Celia has received her own fortune: to kill him. </div><div>

Plan in action: Alex and Celia go to the church on a mission to get information about Nijara, the Fate Walker’s, location. No one’s talking. But someone from the church bumps into Alex, leaving a note behind inviting them to a secret meeting in the club district. They meet and the contact gives them intel about the reality of the fortunes and where to find Nijara. A bomb goes off and both Alex and Celia barely make it out while their contact is killed. Celia sees a mysterious figure leave the scene and chases him, but the figure escapes. She now knows someone else is trying to kill Alex (an assassin).

Midpoint Turning Point: They enlist Celia’s partner at the precinct to help them steal a hovercraft, which they fly to the invisible coordinates where Nijara is “hiding.” Nijara shows them the world is not as it seems. She also reveals Celia’s fortune and takes control of Celia via her band, showing Alex that Fate is more powerful than he realizes. But in Nijara temporarily controlling Celia’s mind, Alex gets a key insight into what was missing from his serum. They escape and Nijara receives a strange message that says “Alex must die or you will.”

Act 3:

Rethink everything: Alex and Celia regroup and now Alex knows Celia needs to be the one to kill him- but he has the tools he needs to change fate, his big goal, and asks her to help him break back into his lab which is now guarded by security robots and scheduled for incineration.
New plan: They break into the lab with the help of one of Alex’s scientists to find the remnants of the serum and finish it before the deadline. But the unknown assassin shows up and there’s a “gunfight” between them as security robots begin the incineration process. Alex chooses to saves Celia at the cost of the serum (his arc) but the serum is turned into an aerosol due to the intense heat, infecting Alex, as they escape. </div><div>

Turning Point (Major shift): The serum mixes with his band’s chemicals and making Alex act erratically. Celia has to cut off the band to save his life which means cutting of his hand- and could also kill him. When he doesn’t die without the band, they realize the serum worked! But they have less than an hour to get Alex across the city in order to transfer his knowledge of the serum securely.

Act 4:

Climax: Nijara shows up and there’s a sky car chase as Alex and Celia try to escape from her and her robots. Their car crashes and Nijara tries to mind/band control Celia to kill Alex, as Fate dictated. Celia is able to fight it long enough to kill Nijara instead. It looks like they’ve won!
Resolution: But Alex is shot by the mysterious assassin at the last second. The assassin turns out to be Celia’s partner from the precinct and he escapes. Before Alex dies, he tells Celia a riddle about how to make more of the serum. Because Celia wasn’t the one to kill Alex, she gets the DEATH FORTUNE. Now it’s up to her to finish the serum and get it to everyone- if she can survive long enough. Nijara is reborn as a clone (reveal) and receives a personal message from the mysterious Fate itself that if she fails again, she will be replaced. Permanently. (Potential franchise ending).
</div>

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s 4 Act Transformational Structure

Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how helpful it is to plot out every major beat this early to discover the world and story. Usually I start writing to discover what happens, so this is a new process for me, but I find it’s still allowing me to be creative and discover, just in a different way. I’m still working out some details and it’s a little messy, but I’m excited to have the beginning of an outline!

Concept: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

Main Conflict: Alex is racing against the clock to finish a serum, which will bring an end to the fate system, before he is killed by the various entities coming against him, ordered by Nijara, the main antagonist who appears to be pulling the strings.

Old Ways:

• Workaholic
• Sacrifices someone to save his project
• Guilt-ridden
• Afraid of death

New Ways:

• Values people over work
• Sacrifices his project to save someone
• Forgives himself
• Unafraid of death

Act 1:

Opening: Alex is late to announce his big breakthrough at a gala held at his lab.

Inciting Incident: Alex receives a delayed fortune via his band (everyone has a band) during his speech telling him to destroy the experiment (a serum that will cause them to not need the bands). He tries to run from it, choosing to save his experiment over his assistant’s life, but to no avail- the experimental serum is apparently destroyed.

Turning Point: Alex receives the DEATH FORTUNE.

Act 2:

New plan: Alex convinces Celia, his estranged wife and a cop, to help him track down the Fate Walker in order to escape the death fortune and have time to finish his project, not knowing that Celia has received her own fortune: to kill him.

Plan in action: Alex and Celia go to the church to get information on Nijara, the Fate Walker’s, location. No one’s talking. But someone from the church invites them to a secret meeting and gives them intel about the reality of the fortunes and where to find Nijara. A bomb goes off and both Alex and Celia barely survive while their contact is killed. Celia thinks someone else is trying to kill Alex too (an assassin).

Midpoint Turning Point: They find Nijara who shows them the world is not as it seems. She also reveals Celia’s fortune and takes control of Celia via her band, showing Alex that Fate is more powerful than he realizes. But in Nijara temporarily controlling Celia’s mind, Alex gets a key insight into what was missing from his serum. They escape.

Act 3:

Rethink everything: Alex and Celia regroup and now Alex knows Celia needs to be the one to kill him- but he has the tools he needs to change fate, his big goal, and asks her to help him break back into his lab which is now guarded by security robots and scheduled for incineration. <div>

New plan: They break into the lab with the help of one of Alex’s scientists and Celia’s partner at the precinct to find the remnants of the serum and finish it before the deadline. But the unknown assassin shows up and there’s a “gunfight” between them as security robots begin the incineration process. Alex chooses to saves Celia at the cost of the serum (his arc) but the serum is turned into an aerosol due to the intense heat, infecting Alex, as they escape.

Turning Point (Major shift): The serum mixes with his band’s chemicals and makes Alex act erratically. Celia has to cut off the band to save his life which means cutting off his hand- which could also kill him. When he doesn’t die without the band, they realize the serum worked! But they have less than an hour to get Alex across the city in order to transfer his knowledge of the serum securely.

Act 4:

Climax: Nijara shows up and there’s a sky car chase as Alex and Celia try to escape from her and her robots. Their car crashes and Nijara tries to mind/band control Celia to kill Alex, as Fate dictated. Celia is able to fight it long enough to kill Nijara instead. It looks like they’ve won! </div>

Resolution: But Alex is shot by the mysterious assassin at the last second. The assassin turns out to be Celia’s partner from the precinct and he escapes. Before Alex dies, he tells Celia a riddle about how to make more of the serum. Because Celia wasn’t the one to kill Alex, she gets the DEATH FORTUNE- they haven’t won at all. Now it’s up to her to finish the serum and get it to everyone- if she can survive long enough. Nijara is reborn as a clone (reveal) and receives a personal message from the mysterious Fate itself. (Potential franchise – open ending).

• This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Subtext Plot

Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how subtext at the plot level adds so much depth to the story and how it’s important to think about these extra layers before you start writing.

Layering:

The world is built on a main “world” religion where Fate is god. The church is led by Nijara, the Fate Walker, who everyone believes is the one who can petition Fate (a prophet-type). When Alex and Celia finally track down Nijara, they find out it’s a false religion built on lies and they’re up against a more insidious force than either of them realized.

Superior Position:

Celia helps Alex but also knows she is going to have to kill him, which she keeps a secret from him, hoping there’s a way to beat fate but not really believing it’s possible. She knows if she tries to fight her fate like Alex, she’ll die next.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Transformational Journey

Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how mapping out the hero’s arc can shape the story/plot and breathe more life into it; I discovered my ending by brainstorming Alex’s external and internal journeys and can now see potential for a franchise where I didn’t before!

Protagonist: Alex Steinway

Arc Beginning: A workaholic scientist who is afraid of dying before he can achieve his goal of beating the fate system.

Arc Ending: A man who willingly gives up his life for another even though it costs him his goal.

Internal Journey: From being afraid of death and valuing his work over people to not fearing death and valuing people over work/ambition.

External Journey: From doing everything he can to avoid the death fortune to giving up his life to save Celia, abandoning the hope of finishing his work- but his actual death occurs one minute after the deadline, which means it’s possible to beat fate after all.

Old Ways:

• Workaholic
• Treats people as lesser than his goal
• Guilt-ridden
• Afraid of death

New Ways:

• Values people over work
• Learns what it means to really live
• Forgives himself
• Unafraid of death

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Intentional Lead Characters

Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies and make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…how being super intentional with characters this early on adds layers and depth that will make it easier to write conflict, subtext and more interesting scenes.

• Character: Alex Steinway (protagonist)
• Logline: Alex is an ambitious scientist on the verge of a breakthrough who is fated to sabotage his own work but when he actively tries to fight it, he receives the ominous death fortune.
• Unique: He’s a workaholic who is determined to change the fate system through his scientific research.
• Character: Celia Steinway (triangle character)
• Logline: Celia is a fiercely law-abiding detective as well as Alex’s semi-estranged wife, and when Alex gets the death fortune she gets a fortune of her own: to kill him.
• Unique: As a detective, she decides to use her resources to help Alex find the Fate Walker before either of their fortunes come true.

• Character: Nijara (antagonist)
• Logline: Nijara is the Fate Walker, the enigmatic head of the church, and the one who’s actually pulling the strings of fate behind the scenes.
• Unique: It’s said she’s the one person who can petition Fate on your behalf- if you can find her.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa’s Title, Concept, and Character Structure!

Vision: I want to be the best writer I can be and a go-to writer in the industry, crafting scripts that become successful movies which make a lasting impact on people.

What I learned from this assignment is…the usefulness and simplicity of choosing a character structure and how that can start to form the bones of the story.

Title: Fate Runners

Genre: Sci-Fi/Action

Concept: What if daily fortunes ruled everyone’s lives and if you disobey, you die?

Logline: In a dystopian world where daily fortunes always come true, a scientist on the verge of a breakthrough receives the death fortune and has 24 hours to alter fate itself or die.

Character Structure: Dramatic Triangle

• This reply was modified 1 year, 11 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi everyone, my name is Alyssa Giannola and I have written two scripts; I recently entered the first one in a small contest!

I hope to develop my conceptual brain in order to create better outlines and start with stronger structure so I’m not doing as much “fixing” in my second and third drafts. I also want to develop marketable scripts- I love the science fiction/fantasy genres so I want to make sure the stories I’m writing are high concept and well written.

I have always loved movies and received my MFA in directing back in 2015. Great to meet you all!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Alyssa Giannola

I agree to the terms of this release form.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi Lloyd,

I’d love to exchange with you! I’m currently waiting for feedback from another partner, but once I’m able to make revisions I can send you my updated outline. My email is alyssagiannola1@gmail.com.

Thanks!

Alyssa

[Alyssa Giannola]

Great! You can send it to alyssagiannola1@gmail.com. I’m still editing my outline from a previous exchange but I should be able to send it to you by tonight. Looking forward to exchanging feedback with you!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi Margaret! I’d be happy to exchange feedback with you tomorrow if you’re interested! I have a few faith-based (or faith-inspired) scripts I’m working on as well. FYI the one I’m currently writing for WIM is not anti-church or anti-God, it’s more anti-cult, if you were concerned about the content. But totally up to you, just let me know.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 9 months ago by  Alyssa Giannola.

[Alyssa Giannola]

Great! I sent you a message on the Timeline, accessed via our profiles, as I wasn’t sure where else to message haha. Just let me know if you can’t view it!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi Paul!

Would you be willing to exchange feedback with me? I’d love your take on my outline since we’re both writing Sci-Fi scripts. If so, I can message you my contact info- but no worries if you’ve partnered with someone else already.

Thanks!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hey Brian! Have you been able to work through module 4 yet? I think our outlines have to go through the whole module before exchanging feedback, to get the most out of this assignment. If you have a 5-10 page outline ready to go, then happy to look it over!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Thanks, Paul! I’m having a lot of fun with these assignments, it’s been super interesting to read everyone’s homework!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Thanks Paul! Great questions!

I’m still working on the specifics of the bands and serum so those elements will probably evolve as I flesh out the world building. Right now, the mind/band control is proximity based (or otherwise limited) and the serum Alex is working on makes it so that they won’t need the bands, and the bands keep them tied in to fate.

Still fleshing this all out to make sure it all makes sense within the world!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Thanks Cassie! Love your concept too, I can already see the bubbling conflicts and potential hijinks that will ensue! And your title captures the idea super well!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi Cassie, great to meet you! What school did you receive your master’s degree from? Was it in screenwriting? Looking forward to getting to know you!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Awesome, I love how the sky’s truly the limit with those genres! I saw you mentioned that you’re in Geneva- I lived in Lausanne for a few months several years ago, such a beautiful area. Looking forward to getting to know you better!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Small world indeed! I love Williamsburg. I’m no longer in VA but my family still is- now I’m in middle TN. I’ll have to see if TN has a similar forum, that sounds like an amazing resource!

[Alyssa Giannola]

Hi Paul! It was for film, I went to Regent University in VA beach. It was a good school! Love hearing that you worked at NASA for 35 years, I bet that was a really cool experience.