Anne Grant
Forum Replies Created
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AG’s Mysteries & Open Loops (Mod 3, Lesson 7)
What I learned: Brainstorming opens up new possibilities to build intrigue with mysteries from the past and open loops looming over the future.
Teaser/Act 1
After Sgt. Roger Gibson chats at the police watering hole with a woman officer, he arrives home and threatens his family.
(TP) His family sneaks out while he sleeps.
Amandla begins singing a prayerful worship song in her bedroom as her husband, Erroll, plays guitar and harmonizes with her. They talk about her decision as a “divine appointment.” She is Black; he is white.
· Main Mystery: Who are Amandla and Erroll, and what is their story?
· Sub-Mysteries: What decision has she made?
Main Open Loop: Will Sgt Gibson’s family escape his violence?Sub-Open Loops: Is he in another romantic relationship? Where is his family going?
Act 2
The next morning, 9-year-old Rickie Gibson sits in the shelter dining room with other children and women. He notices bruises on some of the mothers. A woman named Ruth tells him about the drumming lesson planned for children while their mothers meet that morning. Rickie worries about his dog, who needs a scoop of kibbles every morning. Ruth explains the dog is staying with a very nice volunteer who loves animals.
Amandla’s dreadlocked brother, Jordan, a sociology professor, rings a doorbell, and his 13-year-old daughter, Hope, answers, still in her pajamas. She happily hugs him, exclaiming, “Daddy!”
(M) Why is he ringing the doorbell to his own family’s home?
His wife, Sara, comes, and Jordan asks if Hope can go with him to give a drumming lesson to children at the shelter. As Hope gets ready, her parents speak privately in the kitchen.
(M) Jordan’s wife, Sara, cannot understand the changes in him. He is not the man she married. Their spiritual faith was always central to their life, but he no longer goes to church with her and Hope. She respects his work with other volunteers to start the shelter for battered women and children, but she does not want their daughter to grow up in a broken home. Jordan says he loves Sara and Hope. So he cannot lie to her or pretend to believe what he once did. He reminds her: she wanted him to leave. She needed space to think. He would love to come home, and they could figure it out together.
· Main Mystery: Will their family reunite?
Sub-Mysteries: What’s the issue between Jordan and Sara? <div>
Main Open Loop: Can Sara and Jordan stay together if they no longer share the same beliefs?
Sub-Open Loops: Will Hope feel torn apart by her parents?
Act 3
Amandla attends the Council Against Domestic Violence (CADV) and discovers that several shelter directors are not eager to have a new shelter open that will compete for turf and funds.
(M) Why would they oppose this effort to help women in the capital city, with its larger population, ethnic diversity, and poverty?
Some directors are leery about her clergy credentials. One quizzes her on her commitment to equal rights, gay rights, and reproductive rights.
(OL) Will she support all these issues as she claims?
Main Mystery: Why do expected allies distrust Amandla? </div><div>
Sub-Mysteries:
Main Open Loop: Is Amandla ready to lead the shelter, a world she does not fully understand?Sub-Open Loops:
Sgt. Roger Gibson goes to chief judge’s home on Saturday and meets a deputy sheriff working on his lawn irrigation system.
(TP) Roger tells chief judge his wife assaulted him and he needs a restraining order against her. Chief asks if she does drugs. Gibson must find her in order to serve a subpoena.
Main Mystery: Did the judge believe she assaulted him?</div><div>
Sub-Mysteries: Does the sergeant’s wife use drugs?
Main Open Loop: Will Roger Gibson win custody of their children?
Sub-Open Loops: Who will help him? What is the deputy sheriff’s side-hustle at the chief’s house?
Act 4
At the shelter, Jordan and Hope show the children how to express their feelings by using boxes or cans like drums.
(TP) Rickie tells Hope he is worried about his dog Lizzie. Hope tells her father.
Main Mystery: </div><div>
Sub-Mysteries:
Main Open Loop: Are Jordan and Hope getting too involved in this case?
Sub-Open Loops:
Act 5
Jordan and Hope visit the volunteer’s home. She knows Jordan from their work starting the shelter, and she alerts him to the mob’s interest in the shelter. The mob claims they can provide better protection than the police. She lets Jordan and Hope take Lizzie to the dog park nearby.
Passing the dog park in his cruiser, Sgt. Gibson recognizes Lizzie, and does a U-turn as Jordan and Hope get back into their car with Lizzie. Gibson switches on his siren and lights and chases Jordan’s car in his cruiser as he calls for backup: “A Black guy has my dog!”
(TP) Jordan pulls over, gets out, and Gibson pushes him spread-eagle against the car, frisks him. Hope opens her door, and Lizzie runs away. Gibson shoots at the dog, but appears to miss.
Main Mystery: Why is the mob interested in the shelter? </div>
Sub-Mysteries:
Main Open Loop: What will happen to Jordan, Hope, and Lizzie?
Sub-Open Loops:
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AG Character’s Story Lines
What I learned: (I have switched from my original story to an altogether different story.) Plotting the characters’ story lines makes the overall outline emerge more clearly.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>ACT 1
Essence: (OPENING) Police Sergeant Roger Gibson, a violent controller, comes home and assaults his family.
R Beginning: Police Sgt Roger Gibson comes home at night and assaults his family. His wife accidently nicks him with a knife.
A Beginning: Amandla Watkins sings worship song at home with her husband. She is Black, he is white, and they are co-pastors at City Chapel. When the women’s shelter board asked her to become their executive director, the couple considered it a “divine assignment,” and she accepted.
R Turning Point: Roger’s wife leaves home that night with children and dog, Ruffy. They escape to the shelter, “Sandy’s Place,” where Amandla is starting as director.
ACT 2
Essence: Amandla encounters opposition.
J Beginning: Jordan Watkins, Amandla’s brother, volunteers with children at the shelter and gives them a drumming therapy lesson. Child advocate, Ruth Isaaks, brings 9-year-old Rickie Gibson to the group. Ruth tells Jordan she is happy his sister, Amandla, agreed to serve as executive director.
A Turning Point: Amandla attends the Council Against Domestic Violence (CADV) meeting and discovers that other shelter directors are not eager to have a new shelter open and compete for turf and funds. She never imagined they would oppose the effort.
R Midpoint: Roger tells the court advocate, Santiaga, that his wife assaulted him. He needs a restraining order against her and plans to win custody of the children.
J Turning Point: Rickie tells Jordan he is worried about his dog, Ruffy, since they could not keep her at the shelter. Jordan promises to find out how Ruffy is doing.
ACT 3
Essence: Amanda encounters further opposition.
A Midpoint: Amandla interviews Tiffany, who says she had applied to be executive director. She feels angry that Amandla got the job. Tiffany believes she was not considered because she was a victim of domestic violence. She knows more about this than Amandla does. Should Amandla consider hiring her as assistant director? How well could they work together?
ACT 4
Essence: Jordan takes Ruffy to park, where Roger recognizes the dog and chases Jordan.
J Midpoint: Jordan drives to volunteer’s home where Ruffy is being cared for and offers to take the dog to the park.
J Midpoint: Jordan drives to volunteer’s home where Ruffy is being cared for and offers to take the dog to the park.
R Major Conflict: Sergeant Gibson recognizes Ruffy at the park, chases Jordan, runs to his cruiser, and calls for backup, screaming: “Black guy stole my dog!”
J Major Conflict: Gibson’s cruiser pursues Jordan, and two more cruisers join in with flashing lights and sirens. Jordan pulls his car over and holds his hands open in plain sight at the window. Gibson screams: “Where’d you get the dog, Barack? Open the door!” Jordan keeps his hands visible as he opens the door.
J Ending: Ruffy jumps out and runs away. Gibson pulls Jordan out and pushes him spread-eagle against the car to frisk.
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2.6 AG’s Story Summary
What I learned: This step finally resolved the problem that has kept me dithering for days — how to represent two lead characters who are present in each episode, in both young and old versions of their wisdom (or lack thereof).
SUMMARY
At 3 years old, Dottie Anne’s curiosity interrupts a solemn wedding procession with her high-pitched question: “Mommy, does brides have feets?”
At 4, she is intrigued by a weeping evangelist at a tent meeting revival and hurries to the altar to accept Jesus.
She will become a heavenly minded adolescent who protests the nonsense of sex roles and tries to convert her classmates’ rabbi. God is working out a plan for her to marry a smart seminarian, Phil, who could not possibly commit to someone so naïve. Yet, here they are, Anne and Phil, six decades later, pondering the stories and startling changes they have navigated together.
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2.4 AG’s Episode List Rough Draft
What I learned from this: With the shift to 2-day assignments I fell behind and gave up posting to save time while trying to follow the lessons (excellent!) and keep pondering story possibilities. I appreciate the encouragement to get something down and make changes later.
AUOS BW2.4 Seasons & layers, storylines PILOT.docx
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• Season 1: Heavenly-Minded [1950-1965]
• A. High Concept or major hook of the season.
• A child learns holy, gendered roles are what God intended.
• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey
• She sets out to find a man of God…to become her husband.
• C. Main Conflict:
• She confronts her mother over scripture that women and men should be one
in Christ.
• D. Mystery/Open Loops:
• Can Phil honestly commit to someone so naïve?
• E. Cliffhanger:
• Can this relationship survive?
Episode 1 Dottie Anne, 4, accepts Jesus in a tent meeting revival. Her tantrum later provokes a hesitant encounter with her father’s shaving strop. Later a ruptured appendix nearly kills her and fills her father with tearful relief.
Episode 2 Dottie Anne resists gendered roles but cannot get accepted into Order of the Arrow. Step-by-step, she internalizes femininity though disliking women who behave that way.
Episode 3 She visits Grandpa, who fears the Great Tribulation. She has nightmares of hell. She is angry that the Gideons minimize women as an auxiliary, but she accompanies them to jail and witnesses to an inmate accused of killing her husband.
Episode 4 Inspired by a new pastoral couple, She tries to convert her classmates’ rabbi.
Believing she needs a man of God, she discovers she has a sudden crush on Phil and applies to the Ivy League college across the street from his seminary in New York City.
Episode 5 Professors Ursula and Reinhold Niebuhr introduce her to the Black Civil Rights Movement. She is surprised that he has a pack of cigarettes in his shirt pocket. He later signs his book for her and pours her first glass of wine.
Episode 6 After Anne escapes a sexual assault; she decides to call Phil and invite him to lunch. He offers her a cooking job – something she hates to do, but she accepts it.
Episode 7 An old classmate of Phil’s and would-be boyfriend of Anne’s with racist ideas visits her in the city with a gun and is startled to learn they are engaged.
Episode 8 Anne knows she is out of her depth with Phil, but she convinces him to marry her and sets in motion an improbable relationship before they leave for his year abroad at Cambridge University.
• Season 2: Liberating Marriage [1965-1980]
• A. High Concept or major hook of the season.
• Phil shows Anne connection between racism and sexism.
• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey
• Anne seeking man of God… getting ordained herself.
• Phil survives worst experience of failure in his life.
• C. Main Conflict:
• Anne’s recurring depression; Phil helps her, but
• his messiah complex nearly destroys him.
• D. Mystery/Open Loops:
• Is the move to Connecticut a trial separation?
• E. Cliffhanger:
• Will she pursue someone else?
• Season 3: Pastor-Prophet [1980-1988]
• A. High Concept or major hook of the season.
• Anne learns about sex abuse in families
• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey
• She seeks supernatural remedies: California, Mexico, Texas… Mar’s brain
C. Main Conflict:
Gendered Roles in evangelical “signs-and-wonders” churches
• D. Mystery/Open Loops:
• Is supernatural healing real? Does it last?
• E. Cliffhanger:
• Where will Anne & Phil go next?
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• Season 4: Power & Control [1988-2003]
• A. High Concept or major hook of the season.
• God is leading them to divine assignments.
• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey
• Fingers on Forehead … cutting umbilical cord
• C. Main Conflict:
• Power and Control from abusers, Trish, Mator
• D. Mystery/Open Loops:
• Solving court crises/Are these really divine assignments?
• E. Cliffhanger:
• How is her “umbilical cord to Christianity” cut?
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• Season 5: Becoming Secular [2003-2023]
• A. High Concept or major hook of the season.
• Discovering the ways people create God in their own image
• B. Big Picture Arc/Journey
• From exhaustion … to a new perspective on nature (Laminart; Attenbourough)
• C. Main Conflict:
• Cancer, Pandemic, Homelessness, Does prayer change anything?
• D. Mystery/Open Loops:
• Will new laws pass to allow critical thinking on birth and death decisions
• E. Cliffhanger:
• Children returning to mothers; court remains fraudulent;
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1.12 AG is ready for Professional Framework feedback from SU at $25.
What I learned: I have fallen behind and suddenly failing to get traction as we moved from 3-day assignments to 2-day. I am second-guessing all my answers. Life intrudes. The evaluation beckons. This course has been outstanding (150% improvement, even 200%). I do not want to slip-slide away now. (The order blanks don’t seem operative.) Thanks.
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AG’s Intriguing Concept and World
What I learned: It is worth persisting to figure out whether this story is binge-worthy
Concept: (A reverse conversion story)Lonely girl makes Jesus her best friend
But learns that girls are not allowed many places
So she marries a man of God, gets ordained,
And eventually discovers God exists only in our brains.
<div>
</div>
Engaging world
The world of supernatural beliefs starts in ordinary religions
That tolerate extremes of both kindness and cruelty
She learns about:
Civil rights reformers
Youth ministries
Historical critical Bible study
Prejudice in scriptures
Hospital chaplaincy
Guided meditations for addicts
Clown ministry
Mission trip to Southern Africa
Charismatic renewal movement
Healing ministries
Dangerous extremes: Jonestown
Messiah complexes
Magical thinking
Similarities between church and family court
Trauma-informed therapies to heal memories
Emerging brain research
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11. AG’s Creating Irony!
ASSIGNMENT 1: UNORTHODOX
I learned from assignment 1 how many ironies enliven this show.
Two Ironies
• In the opening scene, other women say, she is not trapped inside by children, when she has been unable to get pregnant. She may in fact be pregnant, and she is running away.
• Although she escapes an Hassidic community, her powerful singing of an Hassidic song wins her a scholarship at the music school in Berlin.
ASSIGNMENT 2: ABOVE US ONLY SKY
From Assignment 2, I learned how much potential there is to reveal opposites in this story.
Situational Irony:
• This is a reverse conversion story.<div>
• Dedicated pastors discover in retirement they do not believe in God and feel
• Christians say “Neither male nor female in Christ; we are all one,” but insist that women submit to men’s authority.
Character Irony:
Anne
• So heavenly-minded she is no earthly good </div><div>
• Jesus is her best and only friend
• Sings about joy but feels anger,
About peace, but feels conflict.• Prays in tongues, but cannot speak in English about feelings
• Gets good grades, but cannot think critically
• Charming in public, but punitive in private
• Believes God is giving her assignments for a divine purpose
• Wants to speak for powerless, who resent her power
Phil
• Good problem-solver cannot please wife </div><div>
• Validates Anne’s anger at men and at him.
Both
• See themselves as both pastors and prophets, comforting afflicted and afflicting the comfortable </div>
• Inspire others to believe supernatural ideas that they later reject
• Discover that “supernatural” ideas did not come from beyond them but from within their brains
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10. AG’s Plot and Character Layers
ASSIGNMENT 1: UNORTHODOX
Plot Layers
These are not chronological: We see Esty escaping her marriage before we see her being taught a wife’s sexual responsibilities and then see their wedding and frustration having sex. At the beginning, after she escapes, it is revealed that she is probably pregnant.
Character Layers
The non-chronological plot layering is possible because Esty has distinctively different appearances. We first see her in a Hassidic wig as she escapes from Brooklyn to Berlin, where she will let the wig go in a lake near the birth of the Third Reich. In later episodes, we see her lovely youthful hair as she is courted, married, then shaved, and wigged. In Berlin, she wears a short, stylish crop of hair. Her appearance helps us orient ourselves to the layers of the story.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>ASSIGNMENT 2: ABOVE US ONLY SKY
What I learned: this has been the most challenging, but important step, sorting out the layers in a true story. I think it has to be largely chronological.
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Plot Surface:
• Layer 1: For a few seconds, we see a woman stop where a car has driven off the road. She approaches the door, and sees a woman unconscious behind the wheel. She searches for the woman’s pulse. We notice she is speaking nonsense words under her breath, possibly praying with her eyes wide open, searching the woman’s face, noticing her purse open on the seat beside her. She is talking to Jesus.
• Layer 2: [Heavenly-Minded, 1950-1965] At 4, Anne accepts Jesus at a tent meeting revival and begins a process of internalizing the doctrines of her Pentecostal fundamentalist Christian faith, escaping the threat of hell. Her father takes her and her brother to the Methodist Church, where they meet the pastor and see his son, Phil, who is four years older than Anne. Her mother gives her banana curls and they wear mother-daughter dresses to church. Anne internalizes her parents’ faith, including “Joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart….”
Layer 3: Anne reveals her anger when she has to move from her brother’s room to a feminine room her mother has planned. Occasionally she reveals sarcasm and anger that she is not allowed to take shop or to work on the car with her brother’s friends. She gets no explanations of confusing things — just that she should pray about them, and God will work them out. But frankly, prayer is boring. She just tromps in the woods with Jesus and takes things to heart. After she reads Bambi, she follows the hunters, shouting for the deer to go away.
• Layer 4: After she marries at 19, a new phase begins [Liberating Marriage, 1965-1980] when she gets more in touch with her anger and depression. A therapist helps her connect her rebellion against her mother’s sweetness. Phil encourages her to join the women’s movement and many changes are forthcoming, which Anne still attributes entirely to God’s leading and purpose.
• Layer 5: After she is ordained, she enters her next phase, [Pastor-Prophet, 1980- 2003], which she again attributes entirely to God’s leading. She explores many different kinds of ministry: chaplain to recovering addicts, clowning, church pastor, programmatic and charismatic ministries, trip to Africa, executive director of a shelter for battered and homeless women and children, and inner-city church repairs. She learns about problems in family court and DCYF. When President GW Bush threatens to invade Iraq, she recognizes his behavior is coming from the same magical religious thinking as hers and declares: “You’ve cut my umbilical cord to Christianity.
• Layer 6: When she leaves church ministry and volunteers to work with more mothers in the family court system, she sets out to learn about the healing of memories and the new discoveries of trauma therapists in a phase of [Healing Memories, 2003-2023] In 2009, she and Phil had a watershed moment recognizing that they no longer believe in an omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent God, and that the human soul is, in fact, the brain, and it is not immortal. This proves to be a liberating experience, though some old friends stop talking to them. They have become secular.
Character Surface:
Anne:
• Layer 1: Intrigue: What is happening when Anne finds the woman by the side of the road, but only prays in tongues?
• Layer 2: She accepts Jesus at 4 years old. He will become her only “real” friend until Phil replaces him when they are old.
Phil:
• Layer 1: Self-assured, can-do man frustrated that he cannot please his wife tries to understand her depression. He sees similarities between her depression and anger and that of Black youth he worked with in the Bronx and Harlem.
• Layer 2: He learns about women’s movement, urges her to join even though she wants nothing to do with women.
Layer 3: An invitation to the Playboy Club makes her eager to join the women’s movement, and she sets out to change discrimination against girls in NYC public schools.
• Layer 4: This is the beginning of many changes in their lives and Phil preaches a series of sermons on the place of women in the church.
• Etc.
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9. AG’s Big Picture: Open Loops
ASSIGNMENT 1 UNORTHODOX
What I learned from Assignment 1: Wow! Almost everything seems like an open loop!
1. Big Picture open loops established early
CONSEQUENCES/SOLVING PROBLEMS/DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
We don’t know the meaning of the eruv or the rules (and consequences) that control Orthodox Jews
SOLVING PROBLEMS/DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Esty hides money, papers, photo, but leaves her phone
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Esty is caught going the wrong direction and lies about it
Where has Esty gone?
GOALS/SOLVING PROBLEMS/DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
They go to see the rabbi, who will restore order and bring Esty back
RELATIONSHIPS/ DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Esty’s great grandpa had a wonderful voice but died in Hungary before the war
GOALS/RELATIONSHIPS:
The matchmaker has chosen a husband for Esty: Yanky Shapiro, who sits and studies
RELATIONSHIPS: Esty is not a good match; and Yanky is allied with his mother.
RELATIONSHIPS: Moishe also has marital problems
RELATIONSHIPS: Yanky wanted to see more in Europe, but his father would not let him see more than the rabbis’ graves. Yanky wants more, too.
RELATIONSHIPS: They both like music, but only Yanky can perform with males.
SOLVING PROBLEMS/ RELATIONSHIPS: Esty doesn’t have a mother.
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS: Moishe is frightening.
CONSEQUENCES/ RELATIONSHIPS/DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
Warning: Nobody can find out about this.
GOALS/CONSEQUENCES/SOLVING PROBLEMS/RELATIONSHIPS/ DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS: Rabbi wants Yanky and Moishe to go to Berlin and bring back Esty, who is pregnant
GOALS/SOLVING PROBLEMS/ RELATIONSHIPS/ DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS: Esty’s mother gives Esty repatriation documents for Germany.
GOALS/CONSEQUENCES/SOLVING PROBLEMS/RELATIONSHIPS/DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS: The rabbi will reinstate Moishe if he brings Esty back to Brooklyn.
2. Watch the next episode and see how those open loops are being used to create the need to see future episodes.
Episode 2:
GOALS/RELATIONSHIPS: Esty gets an intriguing lesson in marital sex under Hassidic rules. (How will this work out in real life for Esty and Yanky?) “And it’s your duty to uphold God’s wishes. That’s why we need to guarantee that your wedding night will be a success.”
“Husband and wife fit together like pieces in a puzzle. Understand? — No.”
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS: “There must be something wrong with me.”
CONSEQUENCES: In Germany, Esty also breaks the rules: “No one’s allowed to sleep here.
Don’t you know that? I’m going to report you!”
CONSEQUENCES: In Germany, Yanky still worries about obeying the Hassidic rules if they are still there on the Sabbath and whether the rabbi knows that Moishe has a smartphone and keeping kosher.
RELATIONSHIPS: Yanky also worries about whether Esty is in danger, but Moishe presents him to a prostitute. Yanky is not tempted, but uses this as an opportunity to ask about what Esty wants from him physically.
DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS: Moishe threatens to get the truth out of Esty’s mother with a gun. Yanky says she seems nice.
RELATIONSHIPS: Esty calls her grandmother, who hangs up on her, devastating Esty.
ASSIGNMENT 2:
What I learned from Assignment 2: Open Loop questions open up deeper levels to the story.
1. Use this list to brainstorm big picture open loops for your first season that you will use to keep the audience captivated.
2. Tell us your top 5-8 Big Picture Open Loops that could be in your pilot.
GOALS:
Uncle John warns Phil he must not apply historical critical studies to the Word of God.
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>CONSEQUENCES:
Anne finds an unconscious woman in a car by the side of the road. She prays but does not know what to do. Scene freezes, question left hanging.
SOLVING PROBLEMS:
Just married, Phil is unaware how deeply entrenched Anne is in fundamentalist ideas.
When Phil figures out her record player, she hopes he can figure her out.
RELATIONSHIPS:
Anne’s best friend is Jesus, and she has not experienced a close human friendship.
Anne prays in tongues and has difficulty explaining her depression in English.
An ambulance nearly kills them when Phil swerves automatically to the right, and Anne says: “There’s only one driver’s seat, and you’re in it!”
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>DANGER / SURVIVAL / RISKS:
After meeting Bishop Pike and his son, they learn that the son has committed suicide.
Anne thinks cigarettes are sinful, but buys a pack and considers suicide.
Can Anne and Phil or their marriage survive?
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8. AG’s Show: Mysteries
ASSIGNMENT 1: UNORTHODOX
What I learned doing Assignment 1: I see the difference between the “big picture” mystery that plays out through the series and the smaller mysteries that are revealed in separate shows.
Big Picture Mysteries:
What happened to Esty’s mom?
How does music help Esty find her true self?
Smaller Mysteries:
What is Moishe’s past?
Will Esty return to Brooklyn with Yanky?
How does Yanky grow and prove himself, but not get what he hopes for?
How does Esty prove herself?
ASSIGNMENT 2: ABOVE US ONLY SKY
What I learned doing Assignment 2: This is a breakthrough assignment that has helped me see possibilities for a new structure arising from mystery and intrigue.
Create two mysteries for your show — one that shows up strong in the pilot and the other that is revealed over time.
1. Create your Shocking Event Mystery and tell us the WWWWW and H, along with the part withheld.
A. Shocking Event: I left an unconscious or dead woman in a car by the side of the road<div>
B. Secret: I left and forgot her almost immediately
<div>
C. Investigation: Years later, I remembered with a sense of horror
Who: Anne
When: 1988
Where: rural road to a conference
What: I discovered a car that ran off the road somewhere unfamiliar.
Why: I was praying, asking God what to do
How: My brain slipped into a rut and things seemed surreal
Part Withheld: I believed Jesus was telling me to leave and let him handle this.
2. Create the Over Time Mystery and tell us the WWWWW and H, along with the part withheld.
A. Cover up: For fear of hurting others, we could not reveal that we no longer believed in God</div>
B. Secret: We were committed pastors, retired, who suddenly did not believe what we had preached for decades.
C. Reveals: The dinner when we both recognized this
Who: Phil and Anne
When: Sunday night in January 2009 in our sixties
Where: Providence, RI, kitchen
What: Discovered our beliefs had changed.
Why: culmination of a lifetime of experiences suddenly made sense for us both.
How: over dinner at our round table resembling a candlelit altar.
Part Withheld: We could not tell others the truth or pretend or lie about it.
</div>
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AG’s Show: 7. Empathy/Distress
ASSIGNMENT 1: Unorthodox
What I learned from Assignment 1: Building empathy and distress are major goals in writing drama, especially binge-worthy drama.
Big Picture Empathy/Distress:
Community needs babies to replace 6 million killed in Holocaust
Coercive control by the community
Sense of pressure to obey rules or suffer consequences.
Sense that everyone must conform to tradition and rabbi’s dictates.
Detail-Oriented Empathy/Distress
Grandmother makes Esty feel bad as an “orphan” and hangs up on Esty.
Sense of Esty’s fear and sense of liberation when able to trust and let the wig go.
Community’s coercive control in Esty’s decisions about marriage
Grandfather’s meanness toward his tenant, the kind piano teacher
Moishe is offered a new beginning if he brings Esty back.
Moishe brought a gun
Moishe sets Yanky up for sex at brothel
The history of legal coercion against Esty’s mother.
ASSIGNMENT 2: ABOVE US ONLY SKY
What I learned from Assignment 2: I need to return to this question and dig deeper into potential areas for empathy and distress in numerous characters. This search is central as I go forward.
1. Make a list of BIG PICTURE difficult situations and decisions your characters could make because of the main conflict of this series.
Just ask: “Knowing the concept, what are the big picture Empathy/Distress situations that could occur?”
A. Undeserved misfortune.Phil: Fiscal collapse of NYC in 1974,
Phil’s cancer diagnosis in 2005Anne: arthritic hip
B. External Character conflicts.
Phil: Anne’s pressure;
CUANDO membersAnne: Mator’s forensic audit
C. Plot intruding on life.
Phil: CUANDO takeover of church
Anne: opposition from Victor, Domenic, lawyers, Tassoni, Teresa, governor freezes funds
D. Moral dilemmas.
Phil: Admitting CUANDO members to programAnne: staff steals from church
Both: How can we harm people by telling them pastors no longer believe in God?
E. Forced decisions they’d never make.
Phil: supporting Joe at court
Anne: giving a no-bid contract
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BW Module 1, Lesson 6, BUILDING RELATIONSHIP MAPS
Assignment 1
What I learned from Assignment 1: Relationship Maps provide a systematic way to identify and expand upon the dramas within several relationships over time.
Example Show: UNORTHODOX: ESTY
YANKY
Surface: husband
Common Ground: She is pregnant with Yanky’s baby
Conflict: Yanky wants to bring Esty home.
History: Yanky wanted divorce and Esty left him.
Subtext: Yanky is now touched by Esty’s singing.
Arc: His loyalty shifts from “Mommy” to Esty, but Esty rejects him.
MOISHE
Surface: Would-be kidnapper of Esty.
Common Ground: Both left Hasidism in disgrace.
Conflict: Moishe must bring Esty home to win forgiveness.
History: Moishe returns to brothel and underworld friends.
Subtext: Everybody knows Moishe is a “bad Jew.”
<i style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Arc: Moishe’s Hasidism is only an act, and he fails to bring Esty home.
MOTHER
Surface: Esty’s Mother
Common Ground: Both left Hasidism in disgrace.
Conflict:Esty believes mother abandoned her.
<i style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>History: Esty taken from mother in custody court<div>
<i style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Subtext: Mother threatens Moishe with his gun.
<div>
Arc:Once separated by Hasidism, Mother and Esty are reunited in Berlin.
Assignment 2
What I learned from Assignment 2: The relationship map simplifies the process of examining relationships among real people to identify which ones can enrich the drama in a script based on a true story.
AG’s Show: ABOVE US ONLY SKY: ANNE
PHIL
Surface: Spouse
Common Ground: Both seek to live Christian faith authentically.
Conflict: Phil is in the driver’s seat, and Anne is dubious, scared, depressed.
History: Phil’s parents taught him to talk, think, and behave compassionately, while Anne passively trusted God and prayed in tongues.
Subtext: Phil believes women and men are equal; Anne once believed this, but grows to despise herself for being a woman.
Arc: Phil understands Anne’s depression, encourages her to join the women’s movement, where she becomes purposeful and sees this as God’s will; They continue making changes together and in their sixth decade, discover how their brains created and nourished these ideas about God, a common part of human history.
Surface: Anne’s mother
Common Ground: Both are generally quiet and prioritize a personal relationship with Jesus.
Conflict: Anne accuses mother and women in the Gideon’s auxiliary of worshipping men instead of God.
History: In mother’s early childhood, her mother and two sisters died. When other children ran to their mothers, she comforted herself by running to Jesus.
Subtext: Anne thinks mom is a “sweet airhead,” but Anne is unaware of mom’s childhood trauma and of her own “unchristian” emotions.
Arc:Mom shapes Anne’s early ideas and does not tell Anne her stories for fear she will write about them. After mom’s death, Anne sees how mom supported her goals even while fearing them.
Surface: Anne’s paternal grandpa
Common Ground: Both believe they need to correctly interpret scriptures and witness to others. When Anne wants to be a boy named Daniel, grandpa proudly exclaims, “Dare to be a Daniel! Dare to stand alone!”
Conflict: As a lonely child and teen, Anne does not bother reading grandpa’s carefully constructed letters that she finds boring.
History: In the 1800s, grandpa’s mother escaped a violent husband, and this boy had a nervous breakdown. He found healing in a tract about Jesus. He and his mother began preaching. They later moved from England to America, drawn to one evangelist after another.
Subtext:Grandpa’s rigid doctrines led to frequent ruptures in relationships that hindered his righteous goals and made him seem eccentric.
Arc: Grandpa’s childhood reminded Anne of children at the shelter she led for battered women. Throughout his life, grandpa followed various evangelists before being disappointed and abandoning each one as he sought perfection. He believes God has led him to a place in Arizona where they can “defend themselves against the Reds.” Anne respects the way her father grew beyond his father’s scriptural rigidity. She wonders how their children will grow beyond her and Phil.
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[BW Module 1, Lesson 5, EMOTIONS]
Assignment 1
What I learned from Assignment 1: Various characters’ emotions change step by step from one show to the next as they and the situation are transformed.
<font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>Example Show: UNORTHODOX</font>
<font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>Esty, runaway wife </font>
A. Situational: Hope / Fear<div>
Hope: Her hope has changed from wanting to get pregnant and find happiness in Williamsburg with Yanky. (At the end: she is pregnant, but hopes to win a scholarship and stay in Germany with her mother and friends.)
Fear: “There must be something wrong with me.” Sex is painful, and she cannot get pregnant. (At the end: she fears she is not good enough to win a scholarship, but sings authentically and powerfully.)
B. Motivation: Want / Need
Want: At first she wants to be happy with Yanky. (At the end, she wants to be happy with herself, mother, and friends at the music school.)
Need: At first, she needs to escape the oppressive situation in Williamsburg. (At the end: she needs to be happy and purposeful among others who affirm her.)
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public MaskBase
Negative Emotion: At first: she is trapped, lonely, disrespected, abandoned. (At the end, she is chased, frightened, and still believes she was rejected by mother.)
Public Mask: Determined to play her role, first: as Hasidic wife; (At the end, to make her own place at the music school)
D. Weaknesses: At first, she cannot get pregnant; (At the end, she is pregnant, but musically untrained, needing to work hard.)
E. Triggers: Feeling rejected, first by her mother, then by Yanky, then by friends at the music school, then by grandmother. (At the end, she is able to reject Yanky and the life he represents, even though he, too, is changing.)
F. Coping Mechanism: Esty is determined and always finds someone to help her: first, the woman piano teacher; then, friends at the music school. (At the end, Esty turns to her mother for help and learns the truth that her mother had never rejected her.).
<font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>Yanky, pursuing husband</font>
A. Situational: Hope / Fear</div><div>
Hope: He will find Esty and she will return with him. (At the end: He hopes that Esty will see he is changing and she will accept him.)
Fear: At first, he fears that Esty cannot get pregnant. (At the end, he fears that he cannot make Esty love him, even though he now appreciates her love of music.)
B. Motivation: Want / Need
Want: Yanky wants Esty to get pregnant and return with him to Williamsburg; (At the end: he wants Esty to accept and love him as being able to change.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Need: Yanky needs to make up for wanting a divorce. (At the end: he cannot convince Esty that he is able to change soon enough for her.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public <b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Mask
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Base Negative Emotion: Yanky regrets his “worst mistake” — asking for a divorce.(At the end: To convince her of his love, he cuts his sidecurls, severing his tie to family and faith.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Public Mask: He is completely aligned as an obedient Hasidic son.(At the end: He will go home with his sidecurls cut — or perhaps, not go home at all.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>D. Weaknesses: Yanky is aligned with his mommy and Hasidic indoctrination.(At the end: He tries but fails to convince Esty to stay with him. It is too late.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>E. Triggers: At first, her resistance to the pain of sex and her inability to get pregnant trigger his rejection of her.(At the end, Esty’s powerful performance of an Hasidic song moves him to understand and love her.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>F. Coping Mechanism: Yanky is unlike Moishe and honorable in his sexual faithfulness to Esty. (At the end, he loses Esty, but he is also getting transformed.)
<font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>
</font><font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>Assignment 2</font>
What I Learned from Assignment 2: I learned that small parts of the story may prove visually useful or revealing later. It is worth identifying a full range of items to see which ones emerge as useful later, though some will drop out in the end. <font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>
</font><font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>AG’s show: ABOVE US ONLY SKY</font>
<font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>Anne is born into fundamentalist Christianity, marries Phil, a minister, and then she becomes a minister. In retirement, she and Phil discover their beliefs in the supernatural are imaginary. As nontheists, they continue to focus on making a difference for others, but no longer expect an omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent deity to make it all come out right in the end. </font>
A. Situational: Hope / Fear</div><div>
Hope: Since earliest childhood, Anne believes God has a plan — and hopefully, a man — for her; but whether or not she marries, she will always have Jesus as her best friend. (At the end: she hopes that she and Phil will live long enough to complete a memoir explaining their many changes.)
Fear: She trusts God so thoroughly that she remains unaware of fear until seminary, when she finds herself falling in love with another man and knows they cannot continue as friends. She remains naively fearless without recognizing that her spiritual self-confidence is an illusion. That awareness will come years later. (At the end: A book helps her understand how her brain has been trained to practice intimacy with God and to interpret her feelings as supernatural interventions. She used to believe God would not let her die until she finished her divine assignments on Earth, but this is no longer true. She needs to take responsibility to finish her work. To get healthy, she also gives up meat, dairy, processed foods and becomes a whole-food, plant-based eater to ward off family diseases,; she gets daily exercise and sleep.)</div><div>
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>B. Motivation: Want / Need
Want: She wants to be obedient and fulfill her various divine assignments. (At the end, she sees how many of these goals exhaust her and fall apart within a few years.)
Need: She needs to discern and obey God’s will. She believes she is getting constant confirmation of this worldview, when she is accepted at an ivy league college and wins a scholarship, when she gets jobs at college, when Phil marries her, when they travel to Europe and the Holy Land, when she joins the women’s movement, when her work contributes to important legislation, when her goals for their family are fulfilled, when she goes to seminary and is ordained, when she and Phil go to Africa, when battered mothers tell her how family court hurts their children, when she goes to India for hip surgery — she interprets everything as God’s guidance in her life — always showing her what she must learn next. Then, suddenly, she no longer believes in God. (At the end, she discovers that serendipity still occurs, she learns critical thinking, enjoys being curious, reading secular books, and working on social justice projects with Phil.) ,
C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask
Base negative emotion: She is certain God has saved her and is directing her path, which sometimes makes her feel uncomfortably smug and superior. She believes this is wrong, that Christians should be humble.(At the end: she is gratefully secular and hopes to help others navigate similar changes.)
Public mask: Spiritual serenity cauterizes her emotions at the beginning; (By the end: she has experienced depression, anger, self-loathing, and has gained insights from humor, clown ministry, and trauma therapists.)
D. Weaknesses: She is indoctrinated with supernatural biblical ideas.(At the end: she enjoys writing reviews of compelling secular books that teach her new ideas.)
E. Triggers: When she feels “promptings” or supernatural”quickenings,” she believes God is giving her divine assignments and teaching her something new.(At the end, she recognizes these as personal impulses and stops feeling driven to exhaustion.)
F. Coping Mechanism: She constantly talks to God in her mind, saying, “Thank you, Lord,” and “I love you” almost hypnotically. She believes that near-death experiences show people have an immortal soul. (At the end, she is surprised at how easy and liberating it has been to stop thinking supernaturally as she and Phil change their awareness together. They now recognize the human brain as the only “soul” there is, knowing their brains will die with them.)
<font color=”#343434″ face=”Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif”>Phil marries Anne when she is 19, and he is recently ordained at 23. He recognizes her depression, encourages her to talk about her feelings and to join the women’s movement as they continue changing in unexpected ways. </font>
A. Situational: Hope / Fear</div><div>
Hope: To solve problems and help those who are struggling. He sees the church as a profession where he can do this as his life work. He knows thoughtful ministers and sees no contradiction between Christian ideas and his intellect. (At the end, political extremists reveal why conservative Christianity appeals to people with racial prejudices. Phil sees how abhorrent it is to belief God established a racial or sexual caste system.)
</div><div>
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Fear: His uncle and grandmother’s deaths make him fear that his<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”> parents will die and leave him alone. (At the end, he fears life without Anne and seeks “death with dignity” legislation.)
</div><div>
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>B. Motivation: Want / Need
Want: Phil wants to be successful, to make the dean’s list after he had feared flunking out when he came to college. (At the end, he wants to make a difference changing harmful policies; he wants to teach and inspire positive changes.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Need: He needs to earn Scout merit badges and good grades to compete. As his parents’ only child, he knows all their hopes lay on his shoulders, and he will never disappoint them. He intends to lead and assure things are done right, to make them proud of him, as they are. (At the end, in his 80s, he still needs to keep contributing, to assure that Anne and their children are provided for when he dies, and that he will remain productively helping others.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>C. Mask: Base Negative Emotion / Public Mask
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Base Negative Emotion: Perfection, anger, sense of superiority and self-righteousness. (At the end, despite his many successes, the world remains dire for so many. He will do the best he can.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>Public Mask: Competence, tenacity, compassion (At the end, in retrospect, he sees this as a “messiah complex” that sometimes makes things worse for people.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>D. Weaknesses: Anger, resentment, “after all I’ve done for you, how could you do this to me?” (At the end, he is becoming more mellow, less strident, but equally committed.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>E. Triggers: bullying, dishonesty, injustice, corruption, (At the end, he takes long hikes with Anne and his camera, cherishing the beauty of nature and publishing uplifting items for others.)
<b style=”font-family: inherit; font-size: inherit;”>F. Coping Mechanism Analyze problems and find solutions. Phil prayed with those for whom prayer worked, but did not always find prayer helpful. (At the end, like Mother Theresa, he feels his prayers go nowhere. For a long time he thought it was proof of his inadequacy. He became aware of a change in India, where Anne had hip surgery. Instead of staying at the hospital to pray for her, he went out and took photos to distract himself. For a long time he had been doing the best he could, not expecting any supernatural deity to fix things. The ideas in his folk worship songs still move him: “Lift our eyes beyond our borders, tune our ears to distant weeping.” He and Anne listen continually to NPR news and podcasts to stay informed and engaged.)
</div>
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AG’s Module 1, Lesson 4 Layers of Character Intrigue Assignments
What I learned doing Assignment 1: The layers of intrigue continue to emerge from one show to the next, multiplying the intrigue.
Assignment 1
BW Series: UNORTHODOX
Hidden Agendas: Esty says she is going to visit in-laws when in fact she is escaping.
Competition: She competes with her mother-in-law for Yanky’s loyalty.
Conspiracy: A woman helps Esty get a plane ticket to Berlin
Secrets: Esty’s mother gives her papers proving her entitlement to German citizenship
Deception: Esty goes to Berlin to find her mother
Wound: Her grandmother calls Esty an orphan and disparages her mother
Secret Identity: Esty tells Yanky she is “different from other girls.”
In another episode, more intrigue emerges:
Hidden Agendas: Grandfather’s tenant cannot pay rent but will teach Esty to play piano
Competition: Esty wants to win a scholarship to music school, but is not ready on piano
Conspiracy: Grandfather promises Moishe, the rabbi will reinstate him if he brings Esty back;
Esty’s new friend helps her prepare for the competition.
Secrets: Moshe has a gun.
Deception: Moshe takes Yanky to a brothel and asks his underworld friend to set up a poker game.
Wound: Esty’s mother reveals that she did not abandon Esty, but could not compete in court.
Secret Identity: Esty trusts her new friends in Berlin and discards her Hasidic wig
What I learned doing Assignment 2: Though I have already written a memoir, these levels of intrigue help me identify layered qualities in many of the characters. These examples of intrigue remind me of stories left out of my manuscript that need to be added to show (not tell) intrigue in a TV series.
Assignment 2:
Characters: Anne, activist minister, nonprofit director; Phil, Anne’s spouse, mentor, activist minister, government reformer
Hidden Agenda: From her childhood as a fundamentalist Pentecostal Christian, Anne has believed she is seeking God’s plan and purpose for her life. When she revealed this to her high school teacher, he laughed. Since then, she has rarely mentioned it to others except Phil, but she continues to pursue it throughout their careers. A change comes in retirement.
Competition: Phil is a knowledgable competitor and high achiever, a natural leader in most situations. Anne accepts events, believing they are God’s will.
Conspiracy: This emerges most after 1988, when Anne becomes executive director of a nonprofit serving victims of domestic violence; Anne leads a support group of “Mothers on Trial,” as abusers and their lawyers conspire against them. The wife of a prostitution kingpin volunteers to raise funds for the shelter.
Secrets: When a 16-year-old calls the hotline for help because her father rapes her every weekend, shelter directors confer. Some are afraid to accept her, knowing it is against the law, but if they call DCYF, that agency may put her at greater risk.
Deception: Refugees from war and others trying to survive in an unfamiliar place have a different standard of truth-telling. Anne and Phil often sense they are being lied to — but for understandable reasons.
Wound: Many of the mothers on trial were abused by their own mothers, and they are now determined to protect their children from abuse. But they cannot afford lawyers, and family court becomes abusively coercive, stretching cases over years of torture. Adults and children alike are deeply wounded. Psychologists become an abusive part of the court process.
Secret Identity: After they retire, Anne and Phil discover they no longer believe supernatural doctrines, but they do not want to hurt people who have come to trust them as spiritual leaders.
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What I learned from this assignment: Continually refocusing on the main characters — their expertise, secrets, and contradictions produces greater depth and intrigue in the story.
Module 1, Lesson 3, Assignment 2
AG’s Engaging Main Characters
1. Tell us the journey of your show.
A lonely child, Anne, finds her best friend in Jesus. Although she is a bright student, she holds supernatural beliefs that she seldom talks about for fear of sounding arrogant. She marries Phil, a minister, who recognizes her recurring depression. He encourages her to join the women’s movement and to work on reforms for girls and women in public schools. She produces shows on women’s history and becomes a minister. She seeks supernatural answers to child sex abuse. Battered mothers teach her about discrimination against them in custody courts. She again seeks spiritual answers and becomes pastor of a largely West African congregation. After she and Phil retire they discover they no longer hold supernatural beliefs. They find this liberating.
2. Who are the main characters that will sell your show?
We meet Anne as a young child who responds to an emotional altar call by accepting Jesus in a tent meeting. She grows up in a quiet, predictable fundamentalist home. At 19, Anne marries a Methodist seminarian, voluble and compassionate Phil. His energy sometimes overwhelms her. He has no idea how deeply Anne holds her supernatural beliefs. Phil struggles to understand why he cannot make her happy.
3. Answer these questions for each of those characters.
• A. Role in show:
Anne is the transformable character, but also a change agent.
Phil is a change agent and surprised to learn he is also a transformable character. While both inspire others, they are being changed at the core of their beliefs, which frees them both.
• B. Unique Purpose / Expertise:
Anne asks prophetic questions. She believes that faith in God is her greatest gift and she feels called to help people grow. She also has a creative sense of humor and does clown ministry.
Phil is a critical thinker and tenacious problem-solver, which sometimes causes new problems. He is a skilled Bible scholar and folk singer who composes worship songs. He recognizes similarities in Anne’s anger, despair, and self-loathing to that in Black kids — though Phil and Anne are white.
• C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface?
Anne is cheerful on the surface, but sometimes lonely, depressed, angry, and impatient.
Phil is resourceful and motivated to solve problems. People become dependent on his willingness to help, but then he resents their dependence.
• D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing?
Anne believes the Holy Spirit is leading her when it may be her own sense of moral outrage over injustice. She tends to overload herself, becoming Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired and needs to HALT before she makes a serious mistake.
Phil sometimes “misses the mark” with his impressive intellect, drive, and skills. He dreams about shooting arrows into dangerous places for vulnerable children to retrieve.
• E. Unpredictable: What will they do next?
Anne is fearless testifying against powerful judges who have put battered women and their children in danger. As pastor of a huge inner-city church, she demonstrates for affordable housing and immigrant rights
Phil has an enormous bandwidth and undertakes ambitious projects that leave them both exhausted.
• F. Empathetic: Why do we care?
Anne and Phil both appear to be genuinely committed to people and social justice but naively short-sighted about the demands these make on them, their children, marriage, and others. We want them to survive and thrive, but their divine assignments may do them in.
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Module 1, Lesson 3, Assignment 1
AG’s Engaging Main Characters
What I learned doing this: I recognized that Esty’s absent mother played a significant role throughout this story (and that mine did as well in my own story in ways I had not yet seen).
Esther Shapiro (Esty), the lead character in Unorthodox:
• A. Role in the show: has been raised by her aunt and grandparents to become the obedient Hasidic wife and mother that Esty’s absent mother failed to be.
• B. Unique Purpose / Expertise: Esty is trying to escape her coercively controlling Hasidic community, and she has secretly developed a musical talent.
• C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface?
Esty knows she is different from other girls, but we are not sure how. Her mother has secretly given her papers that prove she is entitled to German citizenship, and her shiksa piano teacher is helping her to secretly escape.
• D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? Esty is defying religious rules by secretly leaving her husband after he says he wants a divorce and when she realizes she may be pregnant.
• E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? Esty goes to Berlin and tries to see her mother. She proves resourceful and is invited to audition for a music scholarship even though she is a novice piano player. She unexpectedly sings a Hasidic song powerfully.
• F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Esty repeatedly questions authority and longs to be free like her new friends in Berlin. She learns that she was told lies about her mother, who loved her but was forced to surrender her as a baby in custody court. Her vulnerability, her eagerness to be free from religious rules, her powerful singing of a Hasidic song, and her refusal to return with her husband all reveal her strength of character.
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Lesson 2, Assignment 2
AG’s Three Circles of Characters
What I am learning from doing this assignment is how to find and highlight the drama in quiet characters who avoid articulating their thoughts, negative feelings, and conflicts.
A. Main Characters Circle:
We meet Anne in 1950 as a 4-year-old rushing to the altar at a tent-meeting revival to accept Jesus and escape hell.
Her brother, Doug, nearly two years older, accepts Jesus at the same time, but their upbringing differs as male and female children.
Their father, an electrician and a Gideon, works with other born-again Christian laymen who buy Bibles to place in hotel rooms and give to prisoners and soldiers, intent on saving souls from the eternal torment of hell.
Their mother, teacher turned homemaker, provides a safe, peaceful, and predictable home. No drama here.
Their father’s father, a retired government worker who arrived from England in 1906, and is now intent on following the Lord’s leading to a safe place to escape the Red’s invasion and the Great Tribulation.
B. Connected Circle:
People at Methodist Church, People at the Full Gospel Church.
C. Environment Circle:
Neighbors, school teachers, television shows.
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Character Circles
ASSIGNMENT 1:
What I learned doing this assignment is how to think about the three circles of characters in my series through their roles in the transformational journey.
Series: Unorthodox
A. Main Characters Circle:
Esty is a quiet but thoughtful and resourceful young Hasidic woman, who wants more from life and escapes a suffocating community in Brooklyn to seek her mother in Berlin.
B. Connected Circle:
Esty’s sister, grandmother and grandfather; Yanky Shapiro, who marries Esty; his mother Millie Shapiro; his father; Moishe, a “bad Jew,” who is eager to get reinstated if he can bring back Esty after she escapes; the tenant who teaches Esty piano and helps her escape to Germany; Esty’s strange father and her absent mother, who gives her papers to claim her German citizenship and attends Esty’s wedding, but is forced to leave. Esty’s friends at music school in Berlin; Orchestra conductor who helps her apply to music school.
C. Environment Circle: The rabbi; matchmaker; mikva instructor, bridal instructor, Hasidic community; miscellaneous people in Brooklyn and Berlin; Esty’s mother’s wife.
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Assignment #1<div>
Thanks to David Wickenden for providing an example and courage to begin. I worked on another Netflix serial, “Unorthodox,” based on a memoir, since I am designing a show based on my own memoir about a journey and transformation from a religious to a secular worldview.
What I learned doing this was how spare the dialogue must be while conveying these five star points through the interplay of scenes, sets, images, actions, and tone.
Big Picture Hooks
Will this coercively controlling community bring back the escaped wife to own and control her baby? <div>
Amazing and Intriguing Character
Esty knows she is different from other girls, but she is trapped in a religious community that despises her as they despised her mother, who is mysteriously absent. The Hasidic culture, their clothing, laws, and ways of speaking are intriguing. </div><div>
Empathy / Distress
Esty communicates the despair of her situation, and we learn she may be pregnant with a baby that raises the stakes and their determination to force her back. </div><div>
Layers / Open Loops
Can Esty escape? Is she pregnant? What happened to her mother? Who is Esty? What are her dreams and how is she “different from other girls”? </div><div>
Inviting Obsession
How does this pilot create the need to see every single episode?
</div></div>The clothing, customs, and beliefs of Hasidim are fascinating, and the mystery of Esty’s identity and mother suggest that this is situation that has occurred before.
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1. Hi! I’m Anne Grant, and I am trying to impress you with my wrinkles and gray hair.
2. I’ve written three produced stage plays (which you have never heard about) and at least five screenplays (likewise). But one of them was produced 45 years ago for the nation’s Bicentennial and won three Emmys. Then I left the industry to get ordained.
3. & 4. I have been writing a memoir and taking classes with Hal and Cheryl for more than 14 years. This is the class that will finally bring it all together for a true story of completely unexpected changes over a 57-year (and counting) marriage.
I’m happy you’re here and have one request: Please never call me a lady. It would totally crush me. 😖 Thanks!
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My name is Anne Grant. I agree to the terms of this release form:
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.