Carl Gundestrup
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Day 14:
What I learned:
I am trying to keep this mess as an outline for the class. But I am actually creating the rest of the script as an outline and writing myself notes as I go. I can’t quite just give the bare-bones story. I have soooo much stuff to clean up and add and Fix! This has been awesome! A new experience for me. I have always started writing and followed where the characters and story took me. I am not actually convinced this is right for my style. But time will tell. I love the idea of having a solid outline to work from and the end already in mind. In the past, my slam-bang finish showed up as progressed. The story came to a natural conclusion with all the loose ends tied up.
INT. MAX PRISON CELL – DAY
Brain surgeon / Navy seal dropout ERIC NEISLEN is questioning serial killer JOHN SALYER using a device that he has created. The device sends milli-volt electric impulses through a platinum conductor gripped in one hand to a stylist placed in a precise n acupuncture point in the other hand. The helmet measures and connects the frequency of the subject’s brain waves using ultra-low-intensity gamma rays. The amplifier device in his briefcase raises the frequency power enough to produce images from the person’s memory. The device also precisely measures brain activity, blood pressure, and heart rate like a typical lie detector. The images are seen as single-frame split-second images and occasional brief clips depending on the intensity of the connected memory. The images can be edited together to create an entire scene of the event. The stylist and conductor are designed to shock the subject if they drop below the top of the head. (In the script, we learned that it is very difficult for a liar to keep his story straight if he has to do two things at once. Avoiding being shocked provides the proper distraction to allow thoughts to be unguarded and increase the anxiety of being discovered.)
John extends a threat that he can’t follow through on. CLUE/FORESHADOWING.
From previous experience, Eric is prepared for John’s attack and responds with some payback. Eric zip-ties John to the bars and tapes the stylists into their proper locations. Eric asks questions regarding John’s murders. Images appear involuntarily, and Eric converses with John even though John is zip-tied to the cell bars through his mouth and unable to speak. We don’t actually see the images yet. (INTRIGUE – Are there images or is this just manipulation by Eric?)
EXT. GROCERY STORE PARKING LOT – NIGHT
BILL HANCOCK has a gambling debt. He is given a job. FBI agent CAYLA AMUNDSEN is watching from a distance.
INT. NEISLEN’S HOME – MORNING
Eric and 7yr/ old son Thor are SO excited about little Kimberly’s upcoming birth. – Eric and Thor are dancing at breakfast for Catherine. (Because of You, Neyo.) Thor graciously seats his mother. – In the car on the way to the airport for Catherine to see her mother. Thor starts, and Eric joins in (Ain’t no sunshine. Bill Withers) Suspense – forshadowing.
EXT. BUSY STREET – MORNING
Eric and Catherine see Bill Hancock driving a box truck through a red light. Eric is able to accelerate and save Catherine, but Thor is killed instantly. Moments later, Eric can see on Bill’s face, “This is a terrible mistake!”
INT. AMBULANCE WINDOW – MOMENTS LATER
Eric places his hands on Catherine’s head and prays as they drive away.
INT. HOSPITAL – DAY
Nine Navy seals, full dress uniform, civilian and combat clothes, Bobby – Cocoa Bean – Tufts – Duke – Tinker – Animal – Fork – Turbulent “Turb” kneel with Eric as he prays.
Eric tells his buddies that he gave Catherine a blessing, and he says she will live. A Doctor tells Bobby privately that the severe brain trauma, injuries, and the c-section, no way. Bobby says – “I’m not that close to God to know personally. But if Eric Neilsen says she’ll live. Trust me. She’ll live.”
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S STUDY – EVENING
Norm is told that Bill hit the wrong guy. Norm says what’s he gonna do? Tell the cops he killed the wrong guy? Pay him 100K and tell him Harrison will get him off on manslaughter, and he’ll be out six months with behavior two years max.”
INT. SPECIAL AGENT JAMES SHAYDIE’S OFFICE – DAY
Cayla confronts her FBI boss about why they are not investigating the death of her partner Mark Lopez, the Neilsen’s and Norman Larusha’s involvement. She is told they need hard proof and want the guy who hired Larusha.
EXT. GRAVESIDE – DAY
Eric buries Thor with all his friends and family.
INT. NEISLEN’S HOME – EVENING
Hot early 40s hospital administrator Sarah Carrion wants Eric as trophy husband and his device. Unbeknownst to Sarah, her get-on-with-life talk convinces Eric that he must make peace with Bill Hancock.
INT. LONG-TERM CARE FACILITY – NIGHT
Eric tells Catherine he needs her strength to forgive Bill. A tiny tear in Catherine’s eye reveals she is trapped in her body but awake.
EXT. TRUCKING COMPANY
Eric’s forgiveness and Bill’s genuine remorse create a bond.
INT. KRAV MAGA GYM – NIGHT
With the fog lifted a bit, Eric returns to Krav Maga classes. FBI agent CAYLA AMUNDSEN tries to get close to Eric as her Krav partner. Eric walks away.
INT. DINER – LATER
Eric is at a diner across the street when he sees a guy follow Cayla. SUSPENSE
EXT. STREET BY THE GYM – MOMENTS LATER
Eric saves Cayla.
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S STUDY – NIGHT
Mafia-type “fixer” NORMAN LARUSHA, who set up Eric’s “accident,” learns of Bill and Eric meeting. Norman makes a call SUSPENSE.
INT. ERIC’S HOME –
Eric learns Thor’s death and Catherine’s demise was a planned hit. MYSTERY – Who is after Cayla, why, and are they Eric’s enemies too? Cayla leaves. Eric calls Seal buddy “Coco Bean,” and explains what he’s learned, and asks for backup. (All seals are now on alert and take turns doing surveillance from a distance throughout the show.)
INT. LONG-TERM CARE FACILITY – EVENING
Cayla tells Catherine, “Sorry – but I’m takin’ your man.” Cayla freaks out when she touches Catherine and discovers that Catherine is “Awake and in there.” They connect! COOL MYSTERY.
FBI HEADQUARTERS – NIGHT
Cayla returns to the FBI to see if she can find what Mark knew that got him killed. FBI boss James Shaydie won’t tell her anything. Is he to be trusted? Or is he part of the problem? INTRIQUE
Cayla learns through an FBI friend Sally Crampton that Eric was booted shortly before Seal graduation because he attacked his C.O. The Navy avoided a black eye & Eric’s court martial by allowing Eric to become a doctor and removing his C.O. from his duties. MYSTERY
INT. COUNTY JAIL – DAY
Eric learns from Cayla that Bill’s attorney sent him back to jail. Eric posts bail and brings Bill and his family to his house for safety.
INT. ERIC’S HOME – EVENING
Bill tells Eric he was only told a time and place to hit a
black Mercedes. (clue to the real target) MYSTERY
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S STUDY – DAY
Norm is ticked that Bill is alive, Cayla’s involved, and he does not have Eric’s device. Norm calls in “professionals.” SUSPENSE
INT. ERIC STUDY – NIGHT
Bill has been forced to text their location to Larusha’s men, or his son TYSON, 7 (who was kidnapped only hours before Eric brought them to his house) – will be killed. SUSPENSE
Eric gets a text from Tufts that the house is surrounded while talking to Bill.
Bill confesses to Eric Just as the laser dot from a sniper rifle lands on Eric’s head. Eric ducks, a bullet hits the chair, and Eric goes postal.
Eric grabs a gun – Runs into the living room, and shoots through the front window at the sniper in a van in front of the house.
EXT. ERIC’S HOME – CONTINUOUS
Eric dives out the window and shoots two more guys on the lawn before going after the sniper in the suburban who shot through his office window. Eric shoots through the car doors hitting the driver and the sniper.
Eric has Catherine watch the bad guys while he puts things in order.
INT. ERIC’S HOME – MOMENTS LATER
Eric gathers Bill, Stephanie, and the girls. He takes Bill and Stephanie’s phones and credit cards and gives them an envelope full of cash. He has them take Catherine’s car to Rockville, buy a decent 4-wheel drive vehicle for cash from an individual, and not register it. “Lock the keys in Catherine’s car at the Walmart by the highway. Buy your phones with cash and take your family to this address. I will bring Tyson there. Here’s my card. Emergency only. You call me, and they have a way to find you. Email me your phone number when you get to where you are going.”
EXT. ERIC’S HOME – MOMENTS LATER
Eric forces the wounded sniper to lead him to Larusha. SUSPENSE
EXT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – NIGHT
How to get in? Eric orders pizza. Susie, the Pizza girl, leaves a pizza on the doorstep with a note from Eric inside. Eric and Cayla rush Norm and get control of Norm and all his information and finances.
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – CONTINUOUS
Eric uses his device on Norm. Norm tells them of the implant that was forced on him at the base of his skull. Eric offers a trade – AFTER they get Tyson back. They get Tyson back. Eric negotiates with Larusha to get ALL his information in exchange for keeping most of his money and fleeing the country.
INT. HOSPITAL – LATER
Eric rushes Norm to the hospital and saves his life. Larusha helps some and disappears. Eric checks to make sure Tyson has not been implanted with a device like Norm’s. They take Tyson’s shoes off – where the tracking device is.
INT. MYSTERIOUS OFFICE – NIGHT
A woman’s hand picks up the phone. She is told Larusha’s gone. She says she knows. She is told Eric has connected with the congressman. She says good. They will lead us to his leak. INTRIGUE
INT. LARUSHA’S HOME – DAY
Eric finds Catherine in his bed, via Cayla. Tyson was left with Nurse Strong. Cayla tells Eric that Catherine cannot open her eyes or speak, but she totally knows what’s going on around her. Eric and Catherine reconnect. Cayla and Catherine “talk” about the reconnection. FUN MYSTERY
From Eric’s device, he learns Larusha does not know who exactly but believes someone way up in the US government wants his device. Larusha was told black Mercedes. Eric has learned that Sarah Carrion contacted Norm. Whom is she working with? Why do people in the state department want Eric’s device, and why are they willing to kill for it? MYSTERY – INTRIGUE.
INT. FBI HEADQUARTERS – DAY
Cayla uses SALLY CRAMPTON FBI associate to check the street video of Eric’s accident. It’s gone! Who took it? MYSTERY
EXT. BUSY STREET – MORNING
Cayla sits at the intersection to wait for a Black Mercedes. She gets the license of Congressman Brad Phillips. INTRIQUE
INT. BRAD PHILLIPS’S HOME – EVENING
Eric explains to Brad how his family was destroyed. Brad says that “message” was intended for him. Brad has an “insurance file,” “they” don’t want it exposed, and killing a congressman is a problem. Brad reveals to them Jermain Davenport, Brad’s former college roomie, and a senior CIA analyst. Brad sets up an appointment with Billy the Bluebird.
INT. JERMAIN’S CABIN – DAY
Jermain leaves his family, goes to a convenience store, and uses the restroom. SUSPENSE
INT. CONVENIENCE STORE RESTROOM – DAY
Eric and Jermain talk. Jermain tells Eric the story of Billy the bluebird. Jermain says he’ll get them a copy, be patient. Good feelings, bad feelings.
EXT. CONVENIENCE STORE – MOMENTS LATER
Jermain exits the store, looks around, and gets in his car.
A small drone a thousand feet up, a mile away, descends into the woods. MYSTERY SUSPENSE
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – DAY
Eric calls and asks Coco to return Tyson to his family.
Cayla and Eric sift through Norm’s stuff. Cayla learns from Eric that his C.O. was trying to kill him. Fight, flight or die were his options.
INT. NURSE STRONG’S HOME – NIGHT
Coco shows up for lunch to meet Tyson. Nurse Strong and Coco hit it off when Strong sees the sweetness of this gargantuan military guy with a terrified little boy. Coco immediately teaches Tyson about being grateful and respectful to women and how his family needs him to be a man.
EXT. BAD NEIGHBORHOOD – NIGHT
Jermain’s body is dropped in an alley. Jermain’s car is parked some distance from the body.
INT. BRAD’S CONGRESSIONAL OFFICE – DAY
Congressman Brad Phillips tells Eric and Cayla that Jermain is dead. Brad tells them Jermain was mugged in a bad neighborhood and framed as a cheating husband. Brad has proof that it is a lie. INTRIGUE
INT. CONGRESSMAN’S HOME – NIGHT
Cayla and Eric are there to get copies of the congressman’s files.
They learn that Brad Phillips told Jermain to investigate the U.S. withdrawal from Afghanistan. Brad only has notes and a few pages of what Jermain discovered. Did Jermain have hard proof? Did he hide it? If so, Where?
Brad tells them that Jermain found a connection between US President Jeff Baldwin and the axis of evil China, Russia, Iran, Pakistan, and the Taliban. The axis is blackmailing the president. But only Jermain has the proof, and he’s dead.
Eric says ‘They don’t know that we don’t have the proof.”
The Congressman is shot dead by a sniper right in front of them.
Car Chase:
Cayla and Eric run for their lives. FBI & CIA are in pursuit. Tufts and several other seals have been watching from a distance, disrupt the pursuit. Eric runs to Bobby’s place and changes cars, and they head for Coco’s place in Louisiana.
INT. LARUSHA’S HOME – DAY
Turb is protecting Catherine and preparing her to go to Louisiana. The villain’s minions kill Turb and take Catherine.
INT. ERIC’S GETAWAY CAR – DAY
The villain tries to squeeze Eric in a text.
“Do you really expect me to believe you will let us go after we give you all our intel? Food for thought – You touch my wife, who can’t open her eyes or talk – and Every TV – Radio station, and news outlet on the planet as well as aborigines in the deepest part of Australia, the Amazon, and Asia, will know every detail of what you have done and what you’re planning. NAMES AND FACES!
You have 24 hours to return Catherine to the assisted living center where she was first placed. If she is not. You better make absolutely certain I’m dead. Because there is no place on this planet where you can hide. And if you dare to place a bomb in her like the one, you did on Norm. You’re dead! I will have nothing to do with the rest of my life but hunt you. 24 hours or YOU and your minions will be “The Daily Planet’s front-page story!”
EXT. GEORGIA HIGHWAY – DAY
Coco and Tyson’s road trip is fun. Coco is told by Bobby they are being followed at a distance of about 100 miles.
EXT. GEORGIA TRUCK STOP – DAY
Coco finds the link in the shoes and puts them on a semi at a truck stop.
EXT. GEORGIA WOOD – EVENING
Coco takes a detour to make sure they are safe. He teaches Ty to shoot a .22. Dress a wound. Build a fire. Catch a fish. Set a snare. Burp the alphabet.
EXT. GEORGIA HIGHWAY – DAY
Coco is stopped by a pretend cop intent on killing Coco and getting the boy.
INT. SUBURBAN – DAY
Ty hides in the compartment under the rear seat of the suburban that Coco built.
INT. GEORGIA SIDE ROAD – MOMENTS LATER
Coco is tipped off by the cop directing them onto a side road where they will be unseen. Coco tazes the cop. He ties him up and throws him in the trunk with the dead officer’s body and the murder weapon and calls 911.
EXT. COCO’S DOME HOME LOUISIANA – DAY
Coco built a dome home from a grain silo roof DEEP in the Bayou. Bill, Stephanie, and the girls are enjoying their vacation. All the food and everything they need is right there.
Eric gets a call from the Congressman’s office telling him he got a book from Amazon. Eric sends Duke to get the book.
EXT. CONGRESSMAN’S HOME – NIGHT
Duke is shot by a bad guy and gets the book. Fork saves Duke in a wild chase and firefight, but the bad guys get the documents and get away.
INT. TINKER’S HOME – LATER
The seals plan to bust into FBI headquarters, take the book back, and send it out on the internet. Eric calls and says slow down. What did it look like? Is it the ONLY one? Jermain seems smarter than that. Was that just a pinch? Bait, to draw them out? Pretty insecure way to send such an important mess of documents. Duke said they look like originals. Really? And how would Jermain get Originals? Duke took shots on his phone before he left the congressman’s office. Whoa! Really?
Fork checks Eric’s mail. He finds a thumb drive from a bogus company selling Thumb drives. It has ALL the real documents.
Seals learn Russian – Chinese and Middle Eastern partners. The number of times Obama and the Muslim Brotherhood had meetings – Gain of Access Funding – Covid-19 Chinese documents.
Eric discovers that the secretary of state, the president, and many others are being blackmailed or are open supporters of a socialist takeover.
That is why the state department took charge of the withdrawal from Afghanistan when they had NO skills or expertise? They were under orders from China & the Taliban? Proof – The date Sept 11th – giving up Bagram – 85 billion in equipment to terrorists AND negotiating the withdrawal when we could have gone out with our heads up at any time we wanted. Hilary’s prevention of “FBI profiling terrorists.” Top secret e-mails on her server. FBI false Russia scandal – Benghazi.
EXT SOUTH CAROLINA – DAY
Car Chase: Eric and Cayla are accused of killing the congressman, Norman Larusha and Jermain. Eric and Cayla leave the hideout to protect Bill and his family. They are spotted in a deserted corner of Myrtle beach. Eric and Cayla are captured by the FBI.
EXT. CITY OF MYRTLE BEACH – DAY
They make a public spectacle so they can’t be secretly murdered.
INT. NEW YORK TIMES – DAY
A Times journalist gets an e-mail from Tinker, and the SEALS reveal everything. The world is abuzz, and the State Department and the Whitehouse call it lies and hate speech. The e-mails, phone transcripts, and documents say otherwise.
INT. COURTROOM VIRGINIA – DAY
Eric sets up a chance for all the Whitehouse and state department people named to come forward and prove their innocence.
Eric is forced to set up a demo of his device. The CIA is to “inspect it.” To see that it is not a fake or has planted evidence. Eric is concerned they will sabotage it. He has a backup that is untried.
Eric’s device does NOT do audio. Eric can only SHOW the people that the politicians said they never met or knew each other to support his allegations and documents.
Minions mess with Eric’s device, and NOW it gets audio, and they are nailed! Eric is in tears as he believes God has nailed them!
Facebook and Twitter call it lies, hate speech, and conspiracy.
The American people are not buying. They are calling for the heads of all involved. The justice department is in it, so who will do the investigation? What is left of Congress calls for a special investigative committee.
Eric finds a letter in the limousine as he gets in. “American leadership discredited and destroyed. Confidence in the government is at zero. Rioting in the streets. Marshall law declared within days. Two years ahead of schedule. Thank you for your assistance.”
After the credits – scene from the next film. Montage: Violence in the streets all across America. Twitter and Facebook show buildings being burned. People are being shot by the military and police. The President declares Marshall law. Banks are shut down, and the government takes complete control and enforces a nationwide curfew.
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Day 14:
What I learned:
I am trying to keep this mess as an outline for the class. But I am actually creating the rest of the script as an outline and writing myself notes as I go. I can’t quite just give the bare-bones story. I have soooo much stuff to clean up and add and Fix! This has been awesome! A new experience for me. I have always started writing and followed where the characters and story took me. I am not actually convinced this is right for my style. But time will tell. I love the idea of having a solid outline to work from and the end already in mind. In the past, my slam-bang finish showed up as progressed. The story came to a natural conclusion with all the loose ends tied up.
INT. MAX PRISON CELL – DAY
Brain surgeon / Navy seal dropout ERIC NEISLEN is questioning serial killer JOHN SALYER using a device that he has created. The device sends milli-volt electric impulses through a platinum conductor gripped in one hand to a stylist placed in a precise n acupuncture point in the other hand. The helmet measures and connects the frequency of the subject’s brain waves using ultra-low-intensity gamma rays. The amplifier device in his briefcase raises the frequency power enough to produce images from the person’s memory. The device also precisely measures brain activity, blood pressure, and heart rate like a typical lie detector. The images are seen as single-frame split-second images and occasional brief clips depending on the intensity of the connected memory. The images can be edited together to create an entire scene of the event. The stylist and conductor are designed to shock the subject if they drop below the top of the head. (In the script, we learned that it is very difficult for a liar to keep his story straight if he has to do two things at once. Avoiding being shocked provides the proper distraction to allow thoughts to be unguarded and increase the anxiety of being discovered.)
John extends a threat that he can’t follow through on. CLUE/FORESHADOWING.
From previous experience, Eric is prepared for John’s attack and responds with some payback. Eric zip-ties John to the bars and tapes the stylists into their proper locations. Eric asks questions regarding John’s murders. Images appear involuntarily, and Eric converses with John even though John is zip-tied to the cell bars through his mouth and unable to speak. We don’t actually see the images yet. (INTRIGUE – Are there images or is this just manipulation by Eric?)
EXT. GROCERY STORE PARKING LOT – NIGHT
BILL HANCOCK has a gambling debt. He is given a job. FBI agent CAYLA AMUNDSEN is watching from a distance.
INT. NEISLEN’S HOME – MORNING
Eric and 7yr/ old son Thor are SO excited about little Kimberly’s upcoming birth. – Eric and Thor are dancing at breakfast for Catherine. (Because of You, Neyo.) Thor graciously seats his mother. – In the car on the way to the airport for Catherine to see her mother. Thor starts, and Eric joins in (Ain’t no sunshine. Bill Withers) Suspense – forshadowing.
EXT. BUSY STREET – MORNING
Eric and Catherine see Bill Hancock driving a box truck through a red light. Eric is able to accelerate and save Catherine, but Thor is killed instantly. Moments later, Eric can see on Bill’s face, “This is a terrible mistake!”
INT. AMBULANCE WINDOW – MOMENTS LATER
Eric places his hands on Catherine’s head and prays as they drive away.
INT. HOSPITAL – DAY
Nine Navy seals, full dress uniform, civilian and combat clothes, Bobby – Cocoa Bean – Tufts – Duke – Tinker – Animal – Fork – Turbulent “Turb” kneel with Eric as he prays.
Eric tells his buddies that he gave Catherine a blessing, and he says she will live. A Doctor tells Bobby privately that the severe brain trauma, injuries, and the c-section, no way. Bobby says – “I’m not that close to God to know personally. But if Eric Neilsen says she’ll live. Trust me. She’ll live.”
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S STUDY – EVENING
Norm is told that Bill hit the wrong guy. Norm says what’s he gonna do? Tell the cops he killed the wrong guy? Pay him 100K and tell him Harrison will get him off on manslaughter, and he’ll be out six months with behavior two years max.”
INT. SPECIAL AGENT JAMES SHAYDIE’S OFFICE – DAY
Cayla confronts her FBI boss about why they are not investigating the death of her partner Mark Lopez, the Neilsen’s and Norman Larusha’s involvement. She is told they need hard proof and want the guy who hired Larusha.
EXT. GRAVESIDE – DAY
Eric buries Thor with all his friends and family.
INT. NEISLEN’S HOME – EVENING
Hot early 40s hospital administrator Sarah Carrion wants Eric as trophy husband and his device. Unbeknownst to Sarah, her get-on-with-life talk convinces Eric that he must make peace with Bill Hancock.
INT. LONG-TERM CARE FACILITY – NIGHT
Eric tells Catherine he needs her strength to forgive Bill. A tiny tear in Catherine’s eye reveals she is trapped in her body but awake.
EXT. TRUCKING COMPANY
Eric’s forgiveness and Bill’s genuine remorse create a bond.
INT. KRAV MAGA GYM – NIGHT
With the fog lifted a bit, Eric returns to Krav Maga classes. FBI agent CAYLA AMUNDSEN tries to get close to Eric as her Krav partner. Eric walks away.
INT. DINER – LATER
Eric is at a diner across the street when he sees a guy follow Cayla. SUSPENSE
EXT. STREET BY THE GYM – MOMENTS LATER
Eric saves Cayla.
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S STUDY – NIGHT
Mafia-type “fixer” NORMAN LARUSHA, who set up Eric’s “accident,” learns of Bill and Eric meeting. Norman makes a call SUSPENSE.
INT. ERIC’S HOME –
Eric learns Thor’s death and Catherine’s demise was a planned hit. MYSTERY – Who is after Cayla, why, and are they Eric’s enemies too? Cayla leaves. Eric calls Seal buddy “Coco Bean,” and explains what he’s learned, and asks for backup. (All seals are now on alert and take turns doing surveillance from a distance throughout the show.)
INT. LONG-TERM CARE FACILITY – EVENING
Cayla tells Catherine, “Sorry – but I’m takin’ your man.” Cayla freaks out when she touches Catherine and discovers that Catherine is “Awake and in there.” They connect! COOL MYSTERY.
FBI HEADQUARTERS – NIGHT
Cayla returns to the FBI to see if she can find what Mark knew that got him killed. FBI boss James Shaydie won’t tell her anything. Is he to be trusted? Or is he part of the problem? INTRIQUE
Cayla learns through an FBI friend Sally Crampton that Eric was booted shortly before Seal graduation because he attacked his C.O. The Navy avoided a black eye & Eric’s court martial by allowing Eric to become a doctor and removing his C.O. from his duties. MYSTERY
INT. COUNTY JAIL – DAY
Eric learns from Cayla that Bill’s attorney sent him back to jail. Eric posts bail and brings Bill and his family to his house for safety.
INT. ERIC’S HOME – EVENING
Bill tells Eric he was only told a time and place to hit a
black Mercedes. (clue to the real target) MYSTERY
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S STUDY – DAY
Norm is ticked that Bill is alive, Cayla’s involved, and he does not have Eric’s device. Norm calls in “professionals.” SUSPENSE
INT. ERIC STUDY – NIGHT
Bill has been forced to text their location to Larusha’s men, or his son TYSON, 7 (who was kidnapped only hours before Eric brought them to his house) – will be killed. SUSPENSE
Eric gets a text from Tufts that the house is surrounded while talking to Bill.
Bill confesses to Eric Just as the laser dot from a sniper rifle lands on Eric’s head. Eric ducks, a bullet hits the chair, and Eric goes postal.
Eric grabs a gun – Runs into the living room, and shoots through the front window at the sniper in a van in front of the house.
EXT. ERIC’S HOME – CONTINUOUS
Eric dives out the window and shoots two more guys on the lawn before going after the sniper in the suburban who shot through his office window. Eric shoots through the car doors hitting the driver and the sniper.
Eric has Catherine watch the bad guys while he puts things in order.
INT. ERIC’S HOME – MOMENTS LATER
Eric gathers Bill, Stephanie, and the girls. He takes Bill and Stephanie’s phones and credit cards and gives them an envelope full of cash. He has them take Catherine’s car to Rockville, buy a decent 4-wheel drive vehicle for cash from an individual, and not register it. “Lock the keys in Catherine’s car at the Walmart by the highway. Buy your phones with cash and take your family to this address. I will bring Tyson there. Here’s my card. Emergency only. You call me, and they have a way to find you. Email me your phone number when you get to where you are going.”
EXT. ERIC’S HOME – MOMENTS LATER
Eric forces the wounded sniper to lead him to Larusha. SUSPENSE
EXT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – NIGHT
How to get in? Eric orders pizza. Susie, the Pizza girl, leaves a pizza on the doorstep with a note from Eric inside. Eric and Cayla rush Norm and get control of Norm and all his information and finances.
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – CONTINUOUS
Eric uses his device on Norm. Norm tells them of the implant that was forced on him at the base of his skull. Eric offers a trade – AFTER they get Tyson back. They get Tyson back. Eric negotiates with Larusha to get ALL his information in exchange for keeping most of his money and fleeing the country.
INT. HOSPITAL – LATER
Eric rushes Norm to the hospital and saves his life. Larusha helps some and disappears. Eric checks to make sure Tyson has not been implanted with a device like Norm’s. They take Tyson’s shoes off – where the tracking device is.
INT. MYSTERIOUS OFFICE – NIGHT
A woman’s hand picks up the phone. She is told Larusha’s gone. She says she knows. She is told Eric has connected with the congressman. She says good. They will lead us to his leak. INTRIGUE
INT. LARUSHA’S HOME – DAY
Eric finds Catherine in his bed, via Cayla. Tyson was left with Nurse Strong. Cayla tells Eric that Catherine cannot open her eyes or speak, but she totally knows what’s going on around her. Eric and Catherine reconnect. Cayla and Catherine “talk” about the reconnection. FUN MYSTERY
From Eric’s device, he learns Larusha does not know who exactly but believes someone way up in the US government wants his device. Larusha was told black Mercedes. Eric has learned that Sarah Carrion contacted Norm. Whom is she working with? Why do people in the state department want Eric’s device, and why are they willing to kill for it? MYSTERY – INTRIGUE.
INT. FBI HEADQUARTERS – DAY
Cayla uses SALLY CRAMPTON FBI associate to check the street video of Eric’s accident. It’s gone! Who took it? MYSTERY
EXT. BUSY STREET – MORNING
Cayla sits at the intersection to wait for a Black Mercedes. She gets the license of Congressman Brad Phillips. INTRIQUE
INT. BRAD PHILLIPS’S HOME – EVENING
Eric explains to Brad how his family was destroyed. Brad says that “message” was intended for him. Brad has an “insurance file,” “they” don’t want it exposed, and killing a congressman is a problem. Brad reveals to them Jermain Davenport, Brad’s former college roomie, and a senior CIA analyst. Brad sets up an appointment with Billy the Bluebird.
INT. JERMAIN’S CABIN – DAY
Jermain leaves his family, goes to a convenience store, and uses the restroom. SUSPENSE
INT. CONVENIENCE STORE RESTROOM – DAY
Eric and Jermain talk. Jermain tells Eric the story of Billy the bluebird. Jermain says he’ll get them a copy, be patient. Good feelings, bad feelings.
EXT. CONVENIENCE STORE – MOMENTS LATER
Jermain exits the store, looks around, and gets in his car.
A small drone a thousand feet up, a mile away, descends into the woods. MYSTERY SUSPENSE
INT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – DAY
Eric calls and asks Coco to return Tyson to his family.
Cayla and Eric sift through Norm’s stuff. Cayla learns from Eric that his C.O. was trying to kill him. Fight, flight or die were his options.
INT. NURSE STRONG’S HOME – NIGHT
Coco shows up for lunch to meet Tyson. Nurse Strong and Coco hit it off when Strong sees the sweetness of this gargantuan military guy with a terrified little boy. Coco immediately teaches Tyson about being grateful and respectful to women and how his family needs him to be a man.
EXT. BAD NEIGHBORHOOD – NIGHT
Jermain’s body is dropped in an alley. Jermain’s car is parked some distance from the body.
INT. BRAD’S CONGRESSIONAL OFFICE – DAY
Congressman Brad Phillips tells Eric and Cayla that Jermain is dead. Brad tells them Jermain was mugged in a bad neighborhood and framed as a cheating husband. Brad has proof that it is a lie. INTRIGUE
INT. CONGRESSMAN’S HOME – NIGHT
Cayla and Eric are there to get copies of the congressman’s files.
They learn that Brad Phillips told Jermain to investigate the U.S. withdrawal from Afghanistan. Brad only has notes and a few pages of what Jermain discovered. Did Jermain have hard proof? Did he hide it? If so, Where?
Brad tells them that Jermain found a connection between US President Jeff Baldwin and the axis of evil China, Russia, Iran, Pakistan, and the Taliban. The axis is blackmailing the president. But only Jermain has the proof, and he’s dead.
Eric says ‘They don’t know that we don’t have the proof.”
The Congressman is shot dead by a sniper right in front of them.
Car Chase:
Cayla and Eric run for their lives. FBI & CIA are in pursuit. Tufts and several other seals have been watching from a distance, disrupt the pursuit. Eric runs to Bobby’s place and changes cars, and they head for Coco’s place in Louisiana.
INT. LARUSHA’S HOME – DAY
Turb is protecting Catherine and preparing her to go to Louisiana. The villain’s minions kill Turb and take Catherine.
INT. ERIC’S GETAWAY CAR – DAY
The villain tries to squeeze Eric in a text.
“Do you really expect me to believe you will let us go after we give you all our intel? Food for thought – You touch my wife, who can’t open her eyes or talk – and Every TV – Radio station, and news outlet on the planet as well as aborigines in the deepest part of Australia, the Amazon, and Asia, will know every detail of what you have done and what you’re planning. NAMES AND FACES!
You have 24 hours to return Catherine to the assisted living center where she was first placed. If she is not. You better make absolutely certain I’m dead. Because there is no place on this planet where you can hide. And if you dare to place a bomb in her like the one, you did on Norm. You’re dead! I will have nothing to do with the rest of my life but hunt you. 24 hours or YOU and your minions will be “The Daily Planet’s front-page story!”
EXT. GEORGIA HIGHWAY – DAY
Coco and Tyson’s road trip is fun. Coco is told by Bobby they are being followed at a distance of about 100 miles.
EXT. GEORGIA TRUCK STOP – DAY
Coco finds the link in the shoes and puts them on a semi at a truck stop.
EXT. GEORGIA WOOD – EVENING
Coco takes a detour to make sure they are safe. He teaches Ty to shoot a .22. Dress a wound. Build a fire. Catch a fish. Set a snare. Burp the alphabet.
EXT. GEORGIA HIGHWAY – DAY
Coco is stopped by a pretend cop intent on killing Coco and getting the boy.
INT. SUBURBAN – DAY
Ty hides in the compartment under the rear seat of the suburban that Coco built.
INT. GEORGIA SIDE ROAD – MOMENTS LATER
Coco is tipped off by the cop directing them onto a side road where they will be unseen. Coco tazes the cop. He ties him up and throws him in the trunk with the dead officer’s body and the murder weapon and calls 911.
EXT. COCO’S DOME HOME LOUISIANA – DAY
Coco built a dome home from a grain silo roof DEEP in the Bayou. Bill, Stephanie, and the girls are enjoying their vacation. All the food and everything they need is right there.
Eric gets a call from the Congressman’s office telling him he got a book from Amazon. Eric sends Duke to get the book.
EXT. CONGRESSMAN’S HOME – NIGHT
Duke is shot by a bad guy and gets the book. Fork saves Duke in a wild chase and firefight, but the bad guys get the documents and get away.
INT. TINKER’S HOME – LATER
The seals plan to bust into FBI headquarters, take the book back, and send it out on the internet. Eric calls and says slow down. What did it look like? Is it the ONLY one? Jermain seems smarter than that. Was that just a pinch? Bait, to draw them out? Pretty insecure way to send such an important mess of documents. Duke said they look like originals. Really? And how would Jermain get Originals? Duke took shots on his phone before he left the congressman’s office. Whoa! Really?
Fork checks Eric’s mail. He finds a thumb drive from a bogus company selling Thumb drives. It has ALL the real documents.
Seals learn Russian – Chinese and Middle Eastern partners. The number of times Obama and the Muslim Brotherhood had meetings – Gain of Access Funding – Covid-19 Chinese documents.
Eric discovers that the secretary of state, the president, and many others are being blackmailed or are open supporters of a socialist takeover.
That is why the state department took charge of the withdrawal from Afghanistan when they had NO skills or expertise? They were under orders from China & the Taliban? Proof – The date Sept 11th – giving up Bagram – 85 billion in equipment to terrorists AND negotiating the withdrawal when we could have gone out with our heads up at any time we wanted. Hilary’s prevention of “FBI profiling terrorists.” Top secret e-mails on her server. FBI false Russia scandal – Benghazi.
EXT SOUTH CAROLINA – DAY
Car Chase: Eric and Cayla are accused of killing the congressman, Norman Larusha and Jermain. Eric and Cayla leave the hideout to protect Bill and his family. They are spotted in a deserted corner of Myrtle beach. Eric and Cayla are captured by the FBI.
EXT. CITY OF MYRTLE BEACH – DAY
They make a public spectacle so they can’t be secretly murdered.
INT. NEW YORK TIMES – DAY
A Times journalist gets an e-mail from Tinker, and the SEALS reveal everything. The world is abuzz, and the State Department and the Whitehouse call it lies and hate speech. The e-mails, phone transcripts, and documents say otherwise.
INT. COURTROOM VIRGINIA – DAY
Eric sets up a chance for all the Whitehouse and state department people named to come forward and prove their innocence.
Eric is forced to set up a demo of his device. The CIA is to “inspect it.” To see that it is not a fake or has planted evidence. Eric is concerned they will sabotage it. He has a backup that is untried.
Eric’s device does NOT do audio. Eric can only SHOW the people that the politicians said they never met or knew each other to support his allegations and documents.
Minions mess with Eric’s device, and NOW it gets audio, and they are nailed! Eric is in tears as he believes God has nailed them!
Facebook and Twitter call it lies, hate speech, and conspiracy.
The American people are not buying. They are calling for the heads of all involved. The justice department is in it, so who will do the investigation? What is left of Congress calls for a special investigative committee.
Eric finds a letter in the limousine as he gets in. “American leadership discredited and destroyed. Confidence in the government is at zero. Rioting in the streets. Marshall law declared within days. Two years ahead of schedule. Thank you for your assistance.”
After the credits – scene from the next film. Montage: Violence in the streets all across America. Twitter and Facebook show buildings being burned. People are being shot by the military and police. The President declares Marshall law. Banks are shut down, and the government takes complete control and enforces a nationwide curfew.
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(Carl Gundestrup) Misdirects…When Appropriate!
What I learned:
In the assignment before this one, I discovered a great misdirection and added it in. It is a twist, a dead-end clue, and a misdirection that should be a great moment when revealed. My red herring needs work. She needs more time and development to be a good alternative to the villain. I have a lot of details to clean up during the actual scriptwriting phase. This whole thing would have been PERFECT if I had known how the entire story played out BEFORE I took this class.
Map:
1. Eric’s device can find the truth by asking the right question, causing the person to remember. It produces images and precisely measures blood pressure and heart rate to discern the truth versus lies.
2. The Neilsen’s have an incredibly loving and fun family relationship with Thor, Eric & Catherine. Eric and Thor are SOOO excited about little Kimberly’s upcoming birth. (Because of You, Neyo- Eric and Thor dancing before breakfast for Catherine. Thor pulls out mom’s chair– Ain’t no sunshine – In the car on the way to the airport.)
3. The veiled threat by John Salyer sets up – “Who would kill Eric to get his device?”
4. Bill Hancock is coerced into driving a truck into Eric’s Mercedes.
5. Bill Hancock’s face says, “This is not who I was supposed to hit.”
6. Eric gives Catherine a “Priesthood blessing” in the ambulance.
7. Eight Navy seals, full dress uniform, civilian and combat clothes, kneel and pray with Eric at the hospital.
8. Eric tells his buddies that Catherine will live despite the severe brain trauma & injuries and c-section. A Doctor says no way. “Bobby says – I’m not that close to God personally to know. But if Eric says she’ll live. Trust me. She’ll live.
9. Hospital admin Sarah Carrion’s appearance is a clue that she wants Eric’s device and Eric. Sarah’s get-on-with-life talk convinces Eric that he must make peace with Bill Hancock.
10. Eric talks to Catherine about forgiving Bill. He tells Catherine he needs her strength. We see a tear setting up she is in her body and aware of what is going on around her.
11. Eric’s forgiveness and Bill’s genuine remorse build a bond.
12. Eric goes back to Krav Maga, and Cayla storms onto the scene. Eric saves Cayla and learns Thor’s death and Catherine’s demise was a planned hit.
13. Who is after Cayla, and are they Eric’s enemies too?
14. Mafia-type fixer Norman Larusha, who set up Eric’s “accident,” – learns of Bill and Eric talking. (Phone call)
15. Bill is told by HIS attorney to go back to jail – a clue that Bill is about to be silenced. Why?
16. Cayla talks to Catherine, and they connect, Cayla freaks out when she discovers that Catherine is in there.
17. Eric messes up the villain’s plan by posting Bill’s bail and bringing the family to his house for safety.
18. Bill tells Eric he was only told the time and place to hit the black Mercedes. (clue to the real target)
19. Cayla is semi-rogue FBI agent. Why was her partner killed? Why didn’t the FBI investigate? What does her FBI boss James Shaydie know and not tell her? Is he to be trusted? Or is he part of the problem?
20. Cayla learns through an FBI friend that Eric was booted shortly before Seal graduation because he went after his C.O. The Navy avoided a black eye & Eric’s court martial by allowing Eric to become a doctor and removing his C.O. from his duties. (Can you say enemy?)
21. Bill is forced to reveal their location by Larusha’s men, or his son (who was kidnapped only hours before Eric brought them to his house) – will be killed.
22. Bill tells Eric just as the laser dot lands on Eric’s head. Eric ducks, a bullet hits the chair, and Eric goes postal.
23. Eric grabs a gun – Shoots through the front window, and hits the sniper across the street in the front of the house in a van. Eric dives out the window and shoots two more guys on the lawn before going after the sniper on the side of the house. Eric shoots through the car doors and hits the driver and the sniper. He forces them to take them to Larusha.
24. Eric and Cayla turn the tables on Norman. They order pizza. Susie, the Pizza girl, leaves a pizza on the doorstep with a note from Eric inside. Eric and Cayla rush Norm and get control of Norm and all his information and finances.
25. Norm knows about Eric’s device and the people who want it.
26. Norm tells them of the implant at the base of his skull that was forced on him when he went to work with his current employer. Eric offers a trade – AFTER they get the boy back. They get the boy back.
27. Eric rushes Norm to the hospital and saves his life- Larusha helps some and disappears. Eric checks to make sure he has not been implanted with a device like Norm’s.
28. Who told Larusha to hit Eric is still a question. Larusha does not know exactly.
29. Who is Larusha’s intended target if it is not Eric?
30. Cayla brings Catherine to Larusha’s home.
31. Cayla learns Eric his C.O., was trying to kill him after Eric embarrassed him during training. (Can you say enemy?)
32. They sift through facts and clues.
33. The clever reveal of the congressman and his Mercedes.
34. Why was the Congressman targeted?
35. What does the Congressman know?
36. Eric talks to the congressman. Congressman got the hint to “keep your mouth shut” when he saw Eric’s car. (billy the bluebird story?)
37. Clue – Congressman’s CIA Analyst and college roommate Jermain is mugged in a bad neighborhood and killed. Jermain is framed as a cheating husband.
38. What did Congressman Brad Phillips tell Jermain to investigate that got Jermain killed and Brad warned?
39. What did CIA Jermain discover that got him killed? Where did he hide it?
40. John Salyer was not just a serial killer. He was a hitman for Larusha and others.
41. Why did Sarah Carrion connect with Norm Larusha?
42. People in the state department want Eric’s device and are willing to kill for it.
43. Eric’s buddy Cocoa Bean sends them to his cabin in North Carolina.
44. CIA – FBI – NSA- Justice departments are all involved in cover-ups, hits, and clandestine work for an overseeing power. Twitter and Facebook do the democrat’s bidding. Hunter Biden working for the Chinese – Leaving 85 billion in hi-tech equipment and getting out of Afghanistan by the State department – Sept 11th. Negotiating with terrorists when we could have walked away on our own terms. Chinese training in Canada- Chinese stealing US secrets. Russian – Chinese and Middle Eastern partners. Obama and the Muslim Brotherhood – Gain of Access Funding – Covid-19 Chinese –
45. Villain captures Catherine. Villain’s minion tries to squeeze Eric. Eric calls his bluff. You touch my wife, and aborigines in the deepest part of Australia, the Amazon, and Asia will know every detail of what you have done and what you’re planning. Do you really expect me to believe you will honor your word and let us go?
46. Eric gets a tip from the Quorum (we don’t know who at the time) he discovers documents that the secretary of state and the president, and many, many others in both parties, are being blackmailed or just open supporters of terrorist organizations and a socialist takeover. Why did the state department take charge of the withdrawal from Afghanistan when they have NO skills or expertise? Were they under orders from China & the Taliban? Proof – The date – giving up Bagram – 85 billion in equipment to terrorists AND negotiating the withdrawal when we could have gone out with our heads up at any time we wanted. Why the date and the hurry?
47. How many times did Obama meet with the Muslim Brotherhood? Why? GOA Funding? Hilary’s association with terrorist organizations. Top secret e-mails on her server. FBI false Russia scandal – Benghazi –
48. Eric and Cayla are flushed from their hideout in North Carolina and chased into a deserted corner of South Carolina and Myrtle beach. They are cornered on the beach when they are captured and taken into a submarine to escape killers. The sub guys are Quorum of the 12. All wear masks and reveal stuff that Eric has just touched on in terms of international stuff.
49. Eric reveals everything. The world is abuzz, and the State Department and The Whitehouse call it lies and hate speech. Eric sends documents to back it up. Eric sets up a chance for all the Whitehouse and state department people named to come forward and prove their innocence. Eric is forced to set up a demo of his device. The CIA is to “inspect it.” To see that it is not a fake or has planted evidence. Eric is concerned they will sabotage it. He has a backup that is untried.
50. Eric’s device does NOT do audio. The only thing he can do is SHOW the people that the politicians said they never met or knew together to support his allegations and documents. Eric allows them to use his device and lets them say it does not work.
51. Minions mess with Eric’s device, and NOW it gets audio, and they are nailed! Eric is in tears as he believes God has nailed them! CLINCHER!
52. The media call it lies, hate speech, and conspiracy. The American people are not buying. They are calling for the heads of all involved. The justice department is in it, so who will do the investigation? What is left of Congress calls a special investigative committee.
53. Eric finds a letter in the limousine as he gets in.
54. “American leadership discredited and destroyed. Confidence in the government at zero. Rioting in the streets. Marshall law declared within days. 2 years ahead of schedule. Thank you, Eric, for your assistance.
55. After the credits – scene from the next film. Montage: Violence in the streets all across America. Twitter and Facebook show buildings being burned. People are being shot by the military and police. The President declares Marshall law. Banks are shut down, and the government takes complete control and enforces a nationwide curfew.
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Subject line: (Your name) Gives Great Clues!
What I learned from this assignment:
I learned the difference between clues and reveals and their value. I want to re-look at all my clues when I get to writing my script.
List of Mysteries:
1. Why was Eric Neilsen the target of a mafia-style “accident?”
A. Threat by John Salyer
B. Bill Hancock was forced to be the killer.
C. Bill’s face tells us it was a mistake.
D. Eric Learns from Cayla that the car accident was intentional.
2. Is it related to his device?
A. At this point, the only connection to a hit or mafia would be the device or John.
B. Sarah tries to get Eric to accept funding and her help.
C. Bill was told to hit the black Mercedes.
D. Who else owns a black Mercedes?
3. Who were they really after?
A. Who else owns a Black Mercedes like Eric’s?
B. Who drives that road every day at that time?
C. Is there a link between Eric and the guy they’re after besides the car?
D. Is the villain REALLY interested in killing Eric and getting the device, and the audience is thrown off by the vehicle coincidence?
E. (Top secret) The villain uses the car accident for two reasons. To send a message to the Congressman and get Eric’s device so HE can learn the TRUTH from anyone he wants.
4. What does that person know that is worth an assassination attempt?
A. It Must be something big to hire a guy like Norman Lurusha
B. Norm is a political fixer, mostly.
C. Who hired Larusha?
D. Why do they want him dead?
E. What does he/she know?
F. What are the bad guys afraid of?
Map:
1. Eric’s device can find the truth by asking the right question causing the person to remember. It produces images and precisely measures lies or truth.
2. Set up a VERY loving family relationship with Thor, Eric & Catherine, all excited about the new member of the family and the closeness of the existing family and their tight relationship. (Because of You Neyo – Ain’t no sunshine – Thor cares for his mother.)
3. The veiled threat by John Salyer makes up wonder who wants his device – Who will go after Eric to get it?
4. Bill Hancock’s face says this was all a mistake.
5. Eric gives Catherine a blessing in the ambulance.
6. Eight Navy seals dressed in full dress attire to civilian clothes pray with Eric at the hospital.
7. Eric tells SEAL friends that Catherine will live despite the c-section and brain surgery. A Doctor questions Eric’s pronouncement. “Bobby says – I’m not that close to God personally to know. But I believe in Eric. And if Eric thinks she’ll live. Trust me. She’ll live.
8. Sarah’s appearance is a clue that Eric’s device is wanted.
9. Eric talks to Bill and establishes a bond.
10. Cayla appears, and Eric learns Thor’s death and Catherine’s demise were a planned hit.
11. Clue Catherine is in there—a tear when Cayla talks.
12. HIS attorney tells Bill to go back to jail – a clue that Bill is about to be silenced. Why?
13. Eric messes up the villain’s plan by posting Bill’s bail.
14. Bill tells Eric he was told to hit the black Mercedes at that time and place. (clue to the actual target)
15. Bill is forced to reveal their location.
16. Eric has a loose cannon side. He was booted from Seals because he can become unhinged by hateful C.O. He avoided a court martial by becoming a doctor. (When/How to reveal that?)
17. Eric goes ballistic –Shoots the guy in the van through his picture window. They turn the tables on Norman.
18. Norm knows about Eric’s device and the people who want it.
19. Clue Catherine is in there. A tear when Cayla talks.
20. Norman Larusha is a mafia fixer who orchestrated the hit.
21. Whom is Larusha working for?
22. Cayla is semi-rogue FBI agent.
23. Why was her partner killed? Why didn’t the FBI investigate?
24. Cayla has enemies.
25. Who is Larusha’s intended target if it is not Eric?
26. Cayla gets Eric and Catherine together in Larusha’s home.
27. They sift through facts and clues. (Reveal Eric’s unhinged past?)
28. The clever reveal of the congressman and his Mercedes.
29. Why was the Congressman targeted?
30. What does the Congressman know?
31. Eric talks to the congressman. Congressman got the hint when he saw Eric’s car and
32. Clue – Congressman’s CIA college roommate is framed as a philandering man in a bad neighborhood and killed.
33. What is the connection between Congressman Brad Phillips and the dead CIA analyst?
34. John Salyer was not just a serial killer. He was a hitman on a contract.
35. How are Sarah Carrion and Norm Laursha connected?
36. People want Eric’s device and are willing to kill for it.
37. What did CIA Jermain discover that got him killed?
38. What did Jermain do with what he knew?
39. How much does the congressman know, and where is it?
40. CIA – FBI – NSA- Justice department are all involved in cover-ups, hits, and clandestine work for an overseeing power.
41. Villain captures Catherine. Villain’s minion tries to squeeze Eric. Eric calls his bluff. You touch my wife, and aborigines in the deepest part of Australia, the Amazon, and Asia will know every detail of what you have done and what you’re planning. Do you really expect me to believe that you will honor your word and let us go?
42. Eric has friends – Former Seals & the Quorum
43. The quorum of the 12 secret organization set up. Saves Eric and the whole thing.
44. Eric’s device does NOT do audio.
45. Minions mess with Eric’s device, and NOW it gets audio, and they are nailed! CLINCHER!
The EVEN newer twists and turns are in bold.
1. Eric meets with John Salyer and establishes that Eric was a Seal first and a doctor 2nd. Eric says, “Anger management is not a strong point.” John says something threatening. Setting up later that someone is interested in Eric’s device. Intrigue, foreshadowing, and mystery. Who is that person/persons? Why is John a work-alone serial killer working with someone? Who? We learn that Eric’s device is valid and very accurate in finding the truth.
2. Bill Hancock is forced into being a killer. His and his family’s lives are threatened if he does not cooperate. Does not go as expected. Missed hit sets up consequences for Bill. Congressman sees the accident – no clue of impending danger.
3. Eric is approached by His hospital administrator Sarah Carrion to finish his accreditation as a brain surgeon. She Offers to fund his device research. It is subtly obvious that She wants Eric as a trophy husband and knows about his research. She wants in on several levels, and he is not interested in a controlling older woman. Sarah becomes a suspect as a tool in the villain’s plan, and her own desires make her very suspect. She has unwittingly sent Eric into trouble by making him see that he needs to get past his hatred and talk to Bill.
4. Eric talks to Bill, and a bond is formed. Bad for Bill, bad for Eric. Larusha learns about it, and Bill goes back to jail to be killed.
5. Cayla arrives. Eric saves her from a kidnapping. Eric learns his accident was a mafia-style hit. Stakes are now up because Eric is just getting started on the Big Picture. Who are Cayla’s enemies? Are they now Eric’s? (We throw in an enemy to Cayla that has nothing to do with the Villain but threatens their lives? Added mystery? Tension? Intrigue? Confusion? Are the two related? Is this guy with the Villain or working on his own? (MAYBE)
6. Why is Cayla going rogue on the FBI? What happened to her Partner?
7. Eric sees Bill will be killed in jail and bails him out. As a good Christian, and to avoid losing a potential witness to his support, his story.
8. Cayla goes to see her FBI boss, James Shaydie, who is a possible tool of the villain because he let her partner die and did nothing, and he will use all his resources to help in the hunt for Eric and Cayla. Shaydie is getting played by the Villain AND several other of the villain’s friends. Actually, a decent guy in the end.
9. Cayla meets Bill’s two daughters and wife. Eric is in his study when Bill confides that he has given their location, or his KIDNAPPED son will die.
10. Eric goes off the rails and shoots 5 of Larusha’s men and forces them to take them to Larusha’s. We discover Eric was let go by the Seals. When he lost it. Eric has anger management issues.
11. Eric uses the pizza girl to get into the house, and Larusha has the tables turned on him. Eric gets all of Larusha’s money, contacts, dirt on politicians, files, and computer.
12. (Larusha knows he is marked for death. Eric rushes Larusha to his hospital and removes the implant from Larusha’s head. Larusha disappears. Eric gets Larusha’s chest of hard drives and paper files which is a wealth of information. They pretend his death to ensure his safety. (hide this from the audience, possibly?)
13. Eric, Cayla & Catherine are forced into hiding while they go through Larusha’s computer and files. Eric transfers all of Larusha’s money into his account.
14. Eric sees that Minnesota Congressman Brad Phillips’s car is exactly the same as Eric’s, and he uses that car to get to work every day. Eric realizes he was a mistake.
15. Jermain CIA analyst, is killed.
16. Eric has the chance to “get out” and does not take it.
17. Eric approaches Brad Phillips, tells his story, and asks why Norm was told to kill him. Brad is freaked. Brand got the message about being silent when he saw Eric’s car. He tells Eric about the CIA analyst buddy Jermain Cross who was found robbed and dead in an alley in a bad part of town. Framed for cheating on his wife, and no serious investigation by the police or the CIA. FBI does a perfunctory investigation, and it is quickly all over with.
18. Eric uncovers that Sarah told Larusha about his device after Salyer told him about it. Larusha was using Sarah to get it. He figures out that Larusha paid Salyer to murder several people.
19. Brad Phillips is killed shortly after getting Jermain’s CIA file. Eric gets framed for Brad and Norman. Salyer says Eric told him he was going to kill Brad and Norman. Then Jermain is tagged onto his supposed killing spree.
20. Eric becomes an enemy of the state as well as several more attempts on their lives. Larusha’s hard drives self-destruct. They ditch both their phones for burner phones. Eric could be exonerated by having Larusha testify. Larusha has cut off all contact. Double-crossed Eric and remains in hiding. Enter the Seals helping Eric.
21. We reveal the connection between Jermain at the CIA and Cayla’s partner at the FBI.
22. We have a Sarah-hired character who attempts to kill Eric and take his device, which has nothing to do with the villain.
23. Eric sends proof of his whereabouts to the FBI, proving he killed no one. He waits to see what they do. When they do not rescind his warrant, and he talks to them, he goes public. Eric does give the FINAL absolute proof, settling in his mind that the FBI can’t be trusted. The villain possibly owns the FBI, CIA, NSA, and military. Eric soon discovers he has international enemies when he is attacked by a foreigner who wants the device.
24. Catherine and Eric have time together. Cayla gets in trouble, and Eric has to rescue her. He learned of her predicament from Catherine. !!! Wow. Catherine and Cayla are linked.
25. Eric is captured and then saved by the FBI. FBI seems owned by the villain, who is dying to know what Eric knows, what files he has, and where they are. Eric tells the FBI, “You KNOW I’m innocent – Why aren’t you publishing the facts? I was nowhere near any of the 3 men at the time of their deaths. I can prove where I was.” Shadydie’s boss wants Eric’s files. They let Eric go to follow him. Cayla’s trust comes into question here as they follow Eric. How did they know unless Cayla told them?
26. Eric finds the congressman’s file. The world is about to come down on him! Eric is surrounded, and they will kill him and take all his files when the Quorum of the 12 saves him. The 12 open the door revealing the global plot.
27. Villain gets his own copy of the congressman’s file and learns Eric really has very little of the global plan.
28. Eric bluffs that he knows more than he does because of his device. Larusha’s file, and with the congressman’s, is pretty good, but it, too, is not complete. Just a list of the things the Congressman was privy to and some names and incriminating stuff without solid proof. Eric starts to turn the tables a bit. Larusha’s computer gives him some insights as to who is on the villain’s team.
29. Eric pretends to have information from his device and gathers new information by asking John Salyer very specific questions. The villain is getting concerned, which ups the ante.
30. Villain gets Catherine – The villain tells Eric Catherine is with child and tells Eric to give him all the files or he will kill both of them. Eric says you harm either one, and every agency in the world will know every detail of your plan and who you are. You are a liar – You can’t allow us to live. Eric placed a tracker in Catherine’s foot.
31. The quorum of the 12 gives him details and facts he had no clue about regarding the global scope of what is happening. “Banking – inflation – the division of America – the invasion of Ukraine” It’s like you are taking a patient’s temperature that hours to live. You’re seeing symptoms, not the disease.
32. Eric gets Catherine back but loses Cayla. Villain has framed Cayla as an informant. Eric believes it is a lie. But – SHE MIGHT BE. Eric bluffs and says – She was working for you anyway. Go ahead, kill her. Eric finds Cayla and saves her but is captured by the FBI. He is on trial and brings in his device to question the congressman and several others.
33. Villain’s minions tamper with Eric’s device to discredit him. Now it has audio with the video.
34. Eric goes public with Everything he can prove.
35. The Villain does damage control and doubles down on Eric in the next installment.
36. Next episode: “A Thousand Words” Eric’s airtight proof comes into the hands of a master spin doctor, and he becomes the victim.
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Carl Gundestrup
Dramatic Reveals:
What I learned:
I learned how to set up a reveal in far greater detail and with emotional impact. I have to say here- This is all coming so fast, and my story is so complex I’m worried! LOL. I need time. But I am loving this class!!!! I feel like I want to CLEAN up everything. This is like remodeling a house. You have scraps and junk scattered from Heck to breakfast, and you want the house clean and put back together. But that will be some time — in the distant future. I had most of the reveals in place. But they were not perhaps as powerful as they could be. I also want to go back and do more bizarre or mind-bending twists to the story.
Some of the new reveals will add some punch to the show. Eric was booted from Navy Seals after he went after a bad commanding officer. He was basically justified, so rather than creating a PR nightmare for the Navy, they let Eric go to med school.
But we reveal that when Eric goes off, he is a tornado with precision skills and perhaps lacks a good deal of clear judgment. But it is fun. Revealing Catherine is trapped in her body but very coherent, I think, will be a huge emotional explosion for women. The love triangle of Catherine – Cayla, and Eric will be awesome. Cayla’s switch from the ruthless man stealer to Catherine’s advocate/protector with endear her to everyone. Catherine getting pregnant and Eric learning that from the villain will be a huge reveal. Eric calling his bluff and tells him, “You touch my wife and child, and Every aborigine in the farthest reaches of the planet will know every detail of your plans and who you are!
I think I have a great show – But right now, it is a trainwreck looking for a supervisor to clean the track and get everything back in working order.
1. Eric’s device can find the truth by asking the right question causing the person to remember. It produces images and precisely measures lies or truth.
2. Thor’s death and Catherine’s demise were a planned hit.
3. Norm knows about Eric’s device, and there are people who want it.
4. Bill Hancock was forced into attempting the hit.
5. Eric was not really the intended victim.
6. Catherine is trapped inside her body but very much awake.
7. Norman Larusha is a mafia fixer who orchestrated the hit.
8. Why did Larusha try to kill him?
9. Whom is Larusha working for?
10. Cayla is semi-rogue FBI agent.
11. Why was her partner killed? Why didn’t the FBI investigate?
12. Eric’s wife and son were intended victims of a hit.
13. Cayla has enemies.
14. Who is Larusha’s intended target if it is not Eric?
15. Why is Bill sent by his attorney back to jail?
16. Bill has given up their location because they have his son.
17. Eric has a loose cannon side. He was going to be booted from Seals because he can become unhinged. He avoided a court martial by becoming a doctor.
18. Why was the Congressman targeted?
19. What does the Congressman know?
20. The connection between Congressman Brad Phillips and the dead CIA analyst
21. John Salyer was not just a serial killer. He was a hitman on a contract.
22. How are Sarah Carrion and Norm Laursha connected?
23. People want Eric’s device and are willing to kill for it.
24. What did Jermain discover that got him killed?
25. What did Jermain do with what he knew?
26. How much does the congressman know, and where is it?
27. CIA – FBI – NSA- Justice dept. are all involved in cover-ups, hits, and clandestine work for an overseeing power.
28. Catherine is pregnant.
29. Villain tries to squeeze Eric. Eric calls his bluff. You touch my wife, and aborigines in the deepest part of Australia, the Amazon, and Asia will know every detail of what you have done and what you’re planning. Do you really expect me to believe that you will honor your word and let us go?
30. Eric has friends – Former Seals – Quorum
31. Quorum of the 12 secret organization set up. Saves Eric and the whole thing.
32. Eric’s device does NOT do audio.
33. Minions mess with Eric’s device and NOW it get’s audio and they are nailed! CLINCHER!
The EVEN newer twists and turns are in bold
1. Eric meets with John Salyer and establishes that Eric was a Seal first and a doctor 2nd. Eric says “Anger management is not a strong point.” John says something threatening. Setting up later that someone is interested in Eric’s device. Intrigue, foreshadowing, and mystery. Who is that person/persons? Why is John a work-alone serial killer working with someone? Who? We learn that Eric’s device is valid and very accurate in finding the truth.
2. Bill Hancock is forced into being a killer. His and his family’s lives are threatened if he does not cooperate. Does not go as expected. Missed hit sets up consequences for Bill. Congressman sees the accident – no clue of impending danger.
3. Eric is approached by His hospital administrator Sarah Carrion to finish his accreditation as a brain surgeon. She Offers to fund his device research. It is subtly obvious that She wants Eric as a trophy husband and knows about his research. She wants in on several levels, and he is not interested in a controlling older woman. Sarah becomes a suspect as a tool in the villain’s plan, and her own desires make her very suspect. She has unwittingly sent Eric into trouble by making him see that he needs to get past his hatred and talk to Bill.
4. Eric talks to Bill, and a bond is formed. Bad for Bill, bad for Eric. Larusha learns about it, and Bill goes back to jail to be killed.
5. Cayla arrives. Eric saves her from a kidnapping. Eric learns his accident was a mafia-style hit. Stakes are now up because Eric is just getting started on the Big Picture. Who are Cayla’s enemies? Are they now Eric’s? (We throw in an enemy to Cayla that has nothing to do with the Villain but threatens their lives? Added mystery? Tension? Intrigue? Confusion? Are the two related? Is this guy with the Villain or working on his own? (MAYBE)
6. Why is Cayla going rogue on the FBI? What happened to her Partner?
7. Eric sees Bill will be killed in jail and bails him out. As a good Christian and to avoid losing a potential witness to his support his story.
8. Cayla goes to see her FBI boss, James Shaydie, who is a possible tool of the villain because he let her partner die and did nothing, and he will use all his resources to help in the hunt for Eric and Cayla. Shaydie is getting played by the Villain AND several other of the villain’s friends. Actually, a decent guy in the end.
9. Cayla meets Bill’s 2 daughters and wife. Eric is in his study when Bill confides that he has given their location, or his KIDNAPPED son will die.
10. Eric goes off the rails and shoots 5 of Larusha’s men and forces them to take them to Larusha’s. We discover Eric was let go by the Seals. When he lost it. Eric has anger management issues.
11. Eric uses the pizza girl to get into the house, and Larusha has the tables turned on him. Eric gets all of Larusha’s money, contacts, dirt on politicians, files, and computer.
12. (Larusha knows he is marked for death. Eric rushes Larusha to his hospital and removes the implant from Larusha’s head. Larusha disappears. Eric get’s Larusha’s chest of hard drives and paper files which is a wealth of information. They pretend his death to ensure his safety. (hide this from the audience, possibly?)
13. Eric, Cayla & Catherine are forced into hiding while they go through Larusha’s computer and files. Eric transfers all of Larusha’s money into his account.
14. Eric sees that Minnesota Congressman Brad Phillips’s car is exactly the same as Eric’s, and he uses that car to get to work every day. Eric realizes he was a mistake.
15. Jermain CIA analyst, is killed.
16. Eric has the chance to “get out” and does not take it.
17. Eric approaches Brad Phillips and tells his story, and asks why Norm was told to kill him. Brad is freaked. He tells Eric about the CIA analyst buddy Jermain Cross who was found robbed and dead in an alley in a bad part of town. Framed for cheating on his wife, and no serious investigation by the police or the CIA. FBI does a perfunctory investigation, and it is quickly all over with.
18. Eric uncovers that Sarah told Larusha about his device after Salyer told him about it. Larusha was using Sarah to get it. He figures out that Larusha paid Salyer to murder several people.
19. Brad Phillips is killed shortly after getting Jermain’s CIA file. Eric gets framed for Brad and Norman. Salyer says Eric told him he was going to kill Brad and Norman. Then Jermain is tagged onto his supposed killing spree.
20. Eric becomes an enemy of the state as well as several more attempts on their lives. Larusha’s hard drives self-destruct. They ditch both their phones for burner phones. Eric could be exonerated by having Larusha testify. Larusha has cut off all contact. Double-crossed Eric and remains in hiding.
21. We reveal the connection between Jermain at the CIA and Cayla’s partner at the FBI.
22. We have a Sarah-hired character who attempts to kill Eric and take his device, which has nothing to do with the villain.
23. Eric sends proof of his whereabouts to the FBI, proving he killed no one. He waits to see what they do. When they do not rescind his warrant, and he talks to them, he goes public. Eric does give the FINAL absolute proof, settling in his mind that the FBI can’t be trusted. The villain possibly owns the FBI, CIA, NSA, and military. Eric soon discovers he has international enemies when he is attacked by a foreigner who wants the device.
24. Catherine and Eric have time together. Cayla gets in trouble, and Eric has to rescue her. He learned of her predicament from Catherine. !!! wow. Catherine and Cayla are linked.
25. Eric is captured and then saved by the FBI. FBI seems owned by the villain, who is dying to know what Eric knows, what files he has, and where they are. Eric tells the FBI, “You KNOW I’m innocent – Why aren’t you publishing the facts? I was nowhere near any of the 3 men at the time of their deaths. I can prove where I was.” Shadydie’s boss wants Eric’s files. They let Eric go to follow him. Cayla’s trust comes into question here as they follow Eric. How did they know unless Cayla told them?
26. Eric finds the congressman’s file. The world is about to come down on him! Eric is surrounded, and they will kill him and take all his files when the Quorum of the 12 saves him. The 12 open the door to a global plot.
27. Villain gets his own copy of the congressman’s file and learns Eric really has very little of the global plan.
28. Eric bluffs that he knows more than he does because of his device. Larusha’s file, and with the congressman’s, it is pretty good, but it, too is not complete. Just a list of the things the Congressman was privy to and some names and incriminating stuff without solid proof. Eric starts to turn the tables a bit. Larusha’s computer gives him some insights as to who is on the villain’s team.
29. Eric pretends to have information from his device and gathers new information by asking John Salyer very specific questions. The villain is getting concerned, which ups the ante.
30. Villain gets Catherine – The villain tells Eric Catherine is with child and tells Eric to give him all the files or he will kill both of them. Eric says you harm either one, and every agency in the world will know every detail of your plan and who you are. You are a liar – You can’t allow us to live. Eric placed a tracker in Catherine’s foot.
31. The quorum of the 12 give him details and facts he had no clue about regarding the global scope of what is happening. “Banking – inflation – division of America – the invasion of Ukraine” It’s like you are taking a patient’s temperature that hours to live. You’re seeing symptoms, not the disease.
32. Eric gets Catherine back but loses Cayla. Villain has framed Cayla as an informant. Eric believes it is a lie. But – SHE MIGHT BE. Eric bluffs and says – She was working for you anyway. Go ahead, kill her. Eric finds Cayla and saves her but is captured by the FBI. He is on trial and brings in his device to question the congressman and several others.
33. Villain’s minions tamper with Eric’s device to discredit him. Now it has audio with the video.
34. Eric goes public with Everything he can prove.
35. The Villain does damage control and doubles down on Eric in the next installment.
36. Next episode: “A Thousand Words” Eric’s airtight proof comes into a spin doctor, and he becomes the victim.
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• Hero: Eric Neilsen
• Villain: 1st is Norman Larusha. Eric’s objective is to find the guy at the very top.
• Red Herring Character: FBI boss James Shaydie
• Trusted, but shouldn’t be: Kathleen Carion – Congressman Brad Phillips
• Isn’t trusted, but should be: Bill Hancock / Norm Larusha
• Cayla Amundsen – Cayla is Eric’s sidekick who is a disgruntled FBI agent. She gets squeezed, and we have to wonder if she is playing Eric or in a bad circumstance.
Eric saves Larusha, and they have a deal. When Eric is framed for Norm’s murder – Norm remains silent for a long time. He could let Eric go to prison and be killed. Norm comes to Eric’s rescue.
James Shaydie looks out for James.
The EVEN newer twists and turns are in bold
1. Eric meets with John Salyer and establishes that Eric was a Seal first and a doctor 2nd. John says something threatening. Setting up later that someone is interested in Eric’s device. Intrigue, foreshadowing, and mystery. Who is that person/persons? Who is an apparently work-alone serial killer working with? Why?
2. Bill Hancock is forced into being a killer. His and his family’s lives are threatened if he does not cooperate. Does not go as expected. Missed hit sets up consequences for Bill, warns Congressman of impending danger.
3. Eric is approached by His hospital administrator Kathleen Carion to finish his accreditation as a brain surgeon. She Offers to fund his device research. It is subtly obvious that She wants Eric as a trophy husband and knows about his research. She wants in on several levels, and he is not interested in a controlling older woman. She becomes a suspect as a tool in the villain’s plan, and her own desires make her very suspect. She has unwittingly sent Eric into trouble by making him see that he needs to get past his hatred and talk to Bill.
4. Kathleen becomes an unwitting savior by interfering with Eric’s plan
5. Eric talks to Bill, and a bond is formed. Bad for Bill, bad for Eric. Larusha learns about it, and Bill goes back to jail to be killed.
6. Cayla arrives, and her life is spared by Eric, and Eric learns what has been going on. Stakes are now up because Eric is just getting started on the Big Picture, and Cayla’s enemies may now become his enemies if they work together. (We throw in an enemy to Cayla that has nothing to do with the Villain but threatens their lives? Added mystery? Tension? Intrigue? Confusion? Are the two related? Is this guy with the Villain or working on his own?
7. Eric sees Bill will be killed in jail and bails him out. As a good Christian and to avoid losing a potential witness to his support his story.
8. Cayla goes to see her FBI boss, James Shaydie who is a possible tool of the villain because he let her partner die and did nothing, and he will use all his resources to help in the hunt for Eric and Cayla. Shaydie is getting played by the Villain AND several other of the villain’s friends. Actually, a decent guy in the end.
9. Cayla meets Bill’s 2 daughters and wife. Eric is in his study when Bill confides that he has given their location, or his KIDNAPPED son will die.
10. Eric goes off the rails and shoots 5 of Larusha’s men and forces them to take them to Larusha’s.
11. Eric uses the pizza girl to get into the house, and Larusha has the tables turned on him. Eric gets all of Larusha’s money, contacts, dirt on politicians, files, and computer.
12. (Larusha knows he is marked for death. Eric rushes Larusha to the ER and removes implant from Larusha’s head and disappears. Eric is framed for the abduction and murder of Norman Lurusha. Eric get’s Larusha’s chest of hard drives is a wealth of information. They pretend his death to ensure his safety. (hide this from the audience possibly?)
13. Eric, Cayla & Catherine are forced into hiding while they go through Larusha’s computer and files. Eric transfers all of Larusha’s money into his account.
14. Eric sees that Minnesota Congressman Brad Phillips car is exactly the same as Eric’s and he uses that car to get to work everyday. Eric realizes he was a mistake.
15. The villain gives Eric the chance to “get out” and he does not take it.
16. Eric approaches Brad Phillips and tells his story and asks why Norm was told to kill him? Brad is freaked. He tells Eric about the CIA analyst buddy Jermain Cross who was found robbed and dead in an alley in a bad part of town. Framed for cheating on his wife and no serious investigation by the police or the CIA. FBI does a perfunctory investigation and it is quickly all over with.
17. Eric uncovers Cathleen told Larusha about his device after Salyer told him about it. Larusha was using Kathleen to get it. He figures out that Larusha paid Salyer to murder several people.
18. Brad Phillips is killed shortly after getting Jermain’s CIA file. Eric gets framed for Brad and Norman. Salyer says Eric told him he was going to kill Brad and Norman. Then Jermain is tagged on to his supposed killing spree.
19. Eric becomes an enemy of the state as well as several more attempts on their lives. Larusha’s hard drives self-destruct. They ditch both their phones for burner phones. Eric could be exonerated by having Larusha testify. Larusha has cut off all contact. Double-crossed Eric and remains in hiding.
20. We have a Kathleen-hired character who attempts to kill Eric and take his device that has nothing to do with the villain.
21. Eric sends proof to the FBI and waits to see what they do. When they do not rescind his warrant, and he talks to them, he goes public. Eric does give the FINAL absolute proof, settling in his mind that the FBI can’t be trusted. The villain owns the FBI, CIA, NSA, and military, possibly. Eric soon discovers he has international enemies when he is attacked by a foreigner who wants the device.
22. Catherine and Eric have time together. Cayla gets in trouble, and Eric has to rescue her. He learned of her predicament from Catherine. !!! wow. Catherine and Cayla are linked.
23. Eric is captured and then saved by the FBI. FBI – owned by the villain, who is dying to know what he knows and what files he has and where they are are. Eric tells the FBI “You KNOW I’m innocent – Why aren’t you publishing the facts. I was nowhere near any of the 3 men at the time of their deaths. I can prove where I was.” Shadydie’s boss wants Eric’s files. They let Eric go to follow him. Cayla’s trust comes into question here as they follow Eric. How did they know unless Cayla told them.
24. Eric finds the congressman’s file. The world is about to come down on him! Eric surrounded and they will kill him and take all his files when the Quorum of the 12 save him.
25. Villain gets his own copy of the congressman’s file and learns Eric really has very little of the big plan.
26. Eric bluff’s that he knows more than he does because of his device. Larusha’s file, and with the congressman’s, it is pretty good, but it, too is not complete. Just a list of the things the Congressman was privy to and some names and incriminating stuff without solid proof. Eric starts to turn the tables a bit. Larusha’s computer gives him some insights as to who is on the villain’s team.
27. Eric pretends to have information from his device and gathers new information by asking John Salyer very specific questions. The villain is getting concerned, which ups the ante.
28. Villain gets Catherine – The villain learns she is pregnant and tells Eric to give him all the files or he will kill both of them. Eric says you harm either one, and every agency in the world will know every detail of your plan and who you are. You are a liar – You can’t allow us to live. Eric placed a tracker in Catherine’s foot.
29. The quorum of the 12 give him details and facts he had no clue about regarding the global scope of what is happening. “Banking – inflation – division of America – invasion of Ukraine” It’s like you are taking the temperature of a patient that hours to live. You’re seeing symptoms, not the disease.
30. Eric gets Catherine back but loses Cayla. Villain has framed Cayla as an informant. Eric believes it is a lie. But – SHE MIGHT BE. Eric bluffs and says – She was working for you anyway. Go ahead, kill her. Eric finds Cayla and saves her but is captured by the FBI. He is on trial and brings in his device to question the congressman and several others.
31. Villain’s minions tamper with Eric’s device to discredit him. Now it has audio with the video.
32. Eric goes public with Everything he can prove.
33. Next episode: “A Thousand Words” Eric’s airtight proof comes into a spin doctor, and he becomes the victim.
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Carl Gundestrup Twists and Turns:
What I learned: I have some critical components to the story I want to do that are NOT here. The love triangle is basically far from complete. The depth of the characters is missing. Backstories are missing. More action, less dialog. Twists are still too superficial. I need a stronger direction so the change will be more powerful. The device should be the center of the story, and it is a tiny sideline right now. The tremendous power of the device is nowhere to be found right now. It is early, but I am missing a ton of stuff.
The new twists and turns are in bold.
1. Eric meets with John Salyer and establishes that Eric was a Seal first and a doctor 2nd. John says something threatening. Setting up later that someone is interested in Eric’s device. Intrigue, foreshadowing, and mystery. Who is that person/persons? Who is an apparently work-alone serial killer working with? Why?
2. Bill Hancock is forced into being a killer. His and his family’s lives are threatened if he does not cooperate. Does not go as expected. Missed hit sets up consequences for Bill, warns Congressman of impending danger.
3. Eric is approached by His hospital administrator Kathleen Carion to finish his accreditation as a brain surgeon. She Offers to fund his device research. It is subtly obvious that She wants Eric as a trophy husband and knows about his research. She wants in on several levels, and he is not interested in a controlling older woman. She becomes a suspect as a tool in the villain’s plan, and her own desires make her very suspect. She has unwittingly sent Eric into trouble by making him see that he needs to get past his hatred and talk to Bill.
4. Kathleen becomes an unwitting savior by interfering with Eric’s plan
5. Eric talks to Bill, and a bond is formed. Bad for Bill, bad for Eric. Larusha learns about it, and Bill goes back to jail to be killed.
6. Cayla arrives, and her life is spared by Eric, and Eric learns what has been going on. Stakes are now up because Eric is just getting started on the Big Picture, and Cayla’s enemies may now become his enemies if they work together. (We throw in an enemy to Cayla that has nothing to do with the Villain but threatens their lives? Added mystery? Tension? Intrigue? Confusion? Are the two related? Is this guy with the Villain or working on his own?
7. Eric sees Bill will be killed in jail and bails him out. As a good Christian and to avoid losing a potential witness to his support, his story.
8. Cayla goes to see her FBI boss, James Shaydie, who is a possible tool of the villain because he let her partner die and did nothing, and he will use all his resources to help in the hunt for Eric and Cayla. Shaydie is getting played by the Villain AND several other of the villain’s friends. Actually, a decent guy in the end.
9. Cayla meets Bill’s 2 daughters and wife. Eric is in his study when Bill confides that he has given their location, or his KIDNAPPED son will die.
10. Eric goes off the rails, shoots 5 of Larusha’s men, and forces them to take them to Larusha’s.
11. Eric uses the pizza girl to get into the house, and Larusha has the tables turned on him. Eric gets all of Larusha’s money, contacts, dirt on politicians, files, and computer.
12. (Larusha knows he is marked for death. Eric rushes Larusha to the ER and removes the implant from Larusha’s head. The device explodes in Eric’s forceps. – in return, Larusha gives Eric everything he knows, uses 100 million of his own money, and disappears. Eric gets the rest. Larusha’s chest of hard drives is a wealth of information. They pretend his death to ensure his safety. (hide this from the audience, possibly?)
13. Eric, Cayla & Catherine are forced into hiding while they go through Larusha’s computer and files. Eric transfers all of Larusha’s money into his account.
14. A congressman is killed. Eric sees that this car is exactly the same as Eric’s and now realizes he was a mistake. The villain gives Eric the chance to “get out,” and he does not take it.
15. Eric uncovers Cathleen told Larusha about his device after Salyer told him about it. Larusha was using Kathleen to get it. He figures out that Larusha paid Salyer to murder several people.
16. Eric is framed for killing Norman Larusha and becomes an enemy of the state as well as several more attempts on their lives. Larusha’s hard drives self-destruct. They ditch both their phones for burner phones. Eric could be exonerated by having Larusha testify. Larusha has cut off all contact. Double-crossed Eric and remains in hiding.
17. We have a Kathleen-hired character who attempts to kill Eric and take his device that has nothing to do with the villain.
18. Eric sends proof to the FBI and waits to see what they do. When they do not rescind his warrant, and he talks to them, he goes public. Eric does give the FINAL absolute proof, settling in his mind that the FBI can’t be trusted. The villain possibly owns the FBI, CIA, NSA, and military. Eric soon discovers he has international enemies when he is attacked by a foreigner who wants the device.
19. Catherine and Eric have time together. Cayla gets in trouble, and Eric has to rescue her. He learned of her predicament from Catherine. !!! Wow. Catherine and Cayla are linked.
20. Eric is captured and then saved by the FBI. FBI – owned by the villain, who is dying to know what he knows and what files he has.
21. Eric finds the congressman’s file. The world is about to come down on him! Eric tells the villain through the FBI – Back off, or copies of this file will be put on the net, and every news agency in the WORLD will have every detail of the villain’s plan. Things go quiet.
22. Villain gets his copy of the congressman’s file and learns that Eric has nothing.
23. But Eric bluff’s that he knows more than he does because of his device. Larusha’s file, and with the congressman’s, is pretty good, but it is not complete. Just a list of the things the Congressman was privy to.
24. Eric starts to turn the tables a bit. Larusha’s computer gives him some insights as to who is on the villain’s team.
25. Eric pretends to have information from his device and gathers new information by asking John Salyer very specific questions. The villain is getting concerned, which ups the ante.
26. Villain gets Catherine – The villain learns she is pregnant and tells Eric to give him all the files, or he will kill both of them. Eric says you harm either one, and every agency in the world will know every detail of your plan and who you are. You are a liar – You can’t allow us to live. Eric placed a tracker in Catherine’s foot.
27. Eric gets Catherine back but loses Cayla. Villain has framed Cayla as an informant. Eric believes it is a lie. SHE MIGHT BE. Eric bluffs and says – She was working for you anyway. Go ahead, kill her. Eric finds Cayla and saves her, and goes public with Everything.
28. Next episode: “A Thousand Words” Eric’s airtight proof comes into a spin doctor, and he becomes the victim.
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Carl Gundestrup. Thriller Plot!
What I learned:
I learned that I can build a structure much better than before I started this program. But I also need to have a solid beginning – middle, and END. Not two out of three. But I am confident that will come as I move forward.
1. Eric meets with John Salyer, and establish Eric was a Seal first doc 2nd. John says something threatening. Setting up later that someone is interested in his device. Intrigue, foreshadowing, and mystery. Who is that person/persons? Who is an apparently work-alone serial killer working with? Why?
2. Bill Hancock is forced into being a killer. His and his family’s lives are threatened if he does not cooperate. Does not go as expected. Missed hit sets up consequences for Bill, warns Congressman of impending danger.
3. Eric is approached by His hospital administrator to finish his accreditation as a brain surgeon. Offer funding for his device research. It is subtly obvious that She wants Eric as a trophy husband and knows about his research. She wants in on several levels, and he is not interested in a controlling older woman. She becomes a suspect as a tool in the villain’s plan, and her own desires make her very suspect. She has unwittingly sent Eric into trouble by making him see that he needs to get past his hatred and talk to Bill.
4. Eric talks to Bill, and a bond is formed. Bad for Bill, bad for Eric. Larusha learns about it, and Bill goes back to jail to be killed.
5. Cayla arrives, and her life is spared by Eric, and Eric learns what has been going on. Stakes are now up because Eric is just getting started on the Big Picture, and Cayla’s enemies may now become his enemies if they work together. (Do we throw in an enemy to Cayla that has nothing to do with the Villain? Added mystery? Tension? Intrigue? Confusion? Are the two related? Is this guy with the Villain or working on his own?
6. Eric sees Bill will be killed in jail and bails him out. As a good Christian and to avoid losing a potential witness to his support his story.
7. Cayla goes to see her FBI boss, who is a possible tool of the villain because he let her partner die and did nothing, and he will use all his resources to help in the hunt for Eric and Cayla.
8. Cayla meets Bill’s 2 daughters and wife. Eric is in his study when Bill confides that he has given their location, or his son will die.
9. Eric goes off the rails and shoots 5 of Larusha’s men and forces them to take them to Larusha’s.
10. Eric uses the pizza girl to get into the house, and Larusha has the tables turned on him. Eric gets all of Larusha’s money, contacts, dirt on politicians, files, and computer.
11. Larusha dies from an implant at the base of his skull. (Larusha knows he is marked for death. Eric removes his implant – in return, Larusha gives Eric everything he knows and uses 100 million of his money and disappears. Eric gets the rest. Larusha is a wealth of information. Eric rushes Larusha to the ER and removes the device from the boy, which blows up the forceps. They pretend his death to ensure his safety. (hide this from the audience possibly?)
12. Eric, Cayla & Catherine are forced into hiding while they go through Larusha’s computer and files. Eric transfers all of Larusha’s money into his account. Maybe
13. We need to get into the villain’s plan deeper here. What traps is he is setting.
14. A congressman is killed. Eric sees that the car he owns is exactly the same as his and now realizes he was a mistake.
15. Eric uncovers a minor connection between his hospital administrator and Larusha. He figures out that Larusha paid Salyer to murder several people.
16. Eric is framed for killing Norman Larusha and becomes an enemy of the state as well as several more attempts on their lives. They ditch both their phones for burner phones. Eric could be exonerated by having Larusha testify. But then Larusha would lose his freedom.
17. Eric sends proof to the FBI and waits to see what they do. When they do not rescind his warrant, and he talks to them, he goes public. Eric does give the FINAL absolute proof, settling in his mind that the FBI can’t be trusted. The villain owns the FBI, CIA, NSA, and military possibly. He soon discovers he has international enemies when he is attacked in Mexico.
18. Eric learns that some people want his device – others want him dead, and some both.
19. Catherine and Eric have time together. Cayla gets in trouble, and Eric has to rescue her. He learned of her predicament from Catherine. !!! wow. Catherine and Cayla are linked.
20. He is captured and then saved by the FBI. FBI – owned by the villain, is dying to know what he knows and what files he has.
21. Eric finds the congressman’s file. The world is about to come down on him! Eric tells the villain through the FBI – Back off, or copies of this file will be put on the net, and every news agency in the WORLD will have every detail of the villain’s plan. Things go quiet.
22. Villain gets his own copy of the congressman’s file and learns Eric really has nothing.
23. But Eric has Larusha’s file, and with the congressman’s, it is pretty good, but it too is not complete. Just a list of the things the Congressman was privy to.
24. Eric starts to turn the tables a bit. Larusha’s files give him some insights as to who is on the villain’s team.
25. Eric pretends to have information from his device and gathers new information by asking John Salyer very specific questions. The villain is getting concerned, which ups the ante.
26. Villain gets Catherine – The villain learns she is pregnant and tells Eric to give him all the files or he will kill both of them. Eric says you harm either one, and every agency in the world will know every detail of your plan and who you are. You are a liar – You can’t allow us to live. Eric placed a tracker in Catherine’s foot.
27. He gets Catherine back but loses Cayla. Villain has framed Cayla as an informant. Eric believes it is a lie. Eric bluffs and says – She was working for you anyway. Go ahead, kill her. Eric finds Cayla and saves both, and goes public.
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Carl Gundestrup Life Threatening Sequence
What I learned from this assignment:
I learned that messing with conventions can be good, but I am not sure how that will play out in the final scripts. I keep replacing villains because each is just a pawn who is playing a role. Added mysteries are which villain will survive and which will be “taken out.” The show’s biggest mystery is not will America and freedom survive, although that is still a huge question. The big mystery is – who are ALL the players in the plan? How do they fit? Who is the Biggest of the big? Is it one person or a team? Is it separate entities, all with the same goal and striking from different directions? Will they destroy each other to be the “Alexander the great?” Who is good, and who is bad? THEN will America and freedom survive?
1. The Villain’s plan is threatened when Eric talks to Bill Hancock. The stakes increase when FBI agent Cayla enters the picture. When Eric bails Bill out of jail. Eric has gone from a mistake to a possible leak to an obstacle to the villain’s plan. The villain needs to put a stop to this problem. He kidnaps Bill’s son and forces Bill to reveal their location. The villain is thwarted when Eric comes unhinged and kills 3 assassins and takes two hostages, and goes after Norm, the man who is orchestrating the hits.
The man above Norm is clandestinely getting raked over the coals for the failed hit by who we think is the villain. The villain tells Antonio Deltoro, Norm’s boss/contact, that he wants all the guys involved in the failed hit to disappear. Deltoro agrees, but he has his own plan.
Deltoro demands loyalty. He demonstrates loyalty by saving the wounded guys who failed at Eric’s hit. He hides them, and they are told that the villain demanded them dead. Deltoro saves Eric because he wants to make a deal with Eric to get his machine.
Deltoro will kill “his boss, who we think is the villain. Antonio Scalia, the supreme court justice with a “heart attack” at a hunting lodge. No autopsy! “Can you say …Red Herring?” When the time is right to have the greatest impact, it will look as if we cut the head off the snake for a new snake. Then the new snake is killed, and now we are freaked out. That is why this is a trilogy.
1. Deltoro is much farther up the international ladder in the big picture (secret society may be an actual good guy) Eric keeps going up the ladder of bad guys looking for the file that congressman Paul Moss has been keeping. Eric thinks it gives him ALL the answers. Actually, it is just naming the players involved, their clandestine activities, their positions within the government and business, and their ties.
2. The Villain goes on a super offensive. The villain makes Eric an enemy of the state. Hit men from FBI – NSA – CIA. INTERNATIONAL killers are all on the payroll to kill Eric – Cayla – find Bill Eric’s family. The villain attempts to find all of Eric and Catherine’s family to use as leverage. Villain begins going after Eric’s military and work relationships.
3. Eric realizes he cannot win alone. He brings in seal buddies and begins building his own army using Larusha’s sizable fortune. Eric begins using Larusha’s underworld contacts. He makes Eric and Bill enemies of the state. Eric goes public with his defense. His device goes public, and he is forced to demonstrate what it can do. The villain’s minion mess with the device and actually improve it.
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Carl Gundestrup Mystery Sequence
What I learned: Picking a political hot potato has added great difficulty to my challenge but could create a much broader audience and success. The story is becoming far more complex than I had originally intended or felt capable of creating. But with the tips about creating the cover-up and letting my hero figure it out, it is easier than I would have thought. But it will take a great deal more work to turn this into a logical, functioning Thriller. I feel like I have a piece of granite and have just knocked off the corners in my effort to carve out a masterpiece.
1. The Villain is covering up how covid 19 was created, why it was created, and who is responsible for covid 19.
2. How many ways can you cover the secret? (Those are the mysteries)
*The media Focuses the world on Trump and Russian collusion.
*Water market bat –
*An Accident due to poor Chinese protocols –
*Chinese lies, cover-up, shifting blame, refusing to cooperate in a full investigation.
*Why did Barac wait a month before leaving office to refund the dangerous study against his own Lisa Monaco’s statement?
*Who told him to?
*Why was the white house doing a pandemic scenario four days after the NIH lifted the ban?
*How did Fauci know that Trump would face a pandemic in 2017?
3. Eric gets hit and must find out who and why.
4. A. Eric learns from Cayla that the hit was intentional –
B. Why? (answer) The mystery is that it was an accident. It is that he was driving the same kind of car as the intended victim.
C. Eric saves Cayla from Norman Larusha’s men, and Cayla tells all.
D. Eric talks to Bill Hancock – Cover up, kill Bill – Kill Cayla – (FBI CAYLA’S BOSS IS THE RED HERRING) DOES HE hang Cayla and her partner out to dry or …? (FBI mystery – Cover-up or bait for bigger fish?)
E. Eric bails out Bill. (Villain kidnaps Bill’s son and sends guys to kill everyone.
F. Eric thumps killers and gets the first line of defense, Norman Larusha.
G. Norm makes Eric think; the audience believes it is his machine. We learn that Salyer was killing people Larusha needed dead. 2 reasons bad guys need Eric dead one, he might get information out of Salyer 2. He understands that there is a man that the government people want dead.
H. Larusha dies – who killed him, and who is the person he answered to? His files that Eric has contained the answers. They are encrypted.
I. Save Catherine and set up a love triangle, and Cayla learns about God from Eric and Catherine.
J. Eric learns about Congressman Paul Moss of New York. Moss is dirty but smart. He has kept a running file of killings and deals to keep himself alive. He is the one they intended to kill.
K. Eric learns Moss has sent files to multiple outlets after his demise by the FBI demanding Cayla not look at the file and give it to them. They know they are marked for death whether they open it or not. They don’t have it YET. The file is delivered to Eric’s cabin property which the bad guys did not suspect. Eric won’t find it till the end-ish.
L. Eric gets clues from files to go after Larusha’s contact. He learns Larusha orchestrated hits for the FBI and CIA. Larusha is killed by someone else, but the audience thinks it is a government agency and our Villain is a U.S. Government official.
M. We learn all the media lies are coming from US agencies – The media knows they are lies and continue to put forth THEIR agenda for a Progressive socialist AMERICA.
N. Eric is framed as an enemy of the state, publicly proves his innocence, and turns the tables demanding they put on his helmet of truth.
O. The helmet is manipulated previous to a big hearing, and it works BETTER than he had ever thought possible to frame the bad guys and clear him.
P. Eric gets Paul Moss’s file and Norman Larusha’s decoded, and they bluff to draw out the Villain.
Q. Red Herring FBI boss cleared – Dominic Santoro, and friend of George Soros, is caught as the villain – but we leave the story learning that covid was an accident that turned into an opportunity for their MUCH BIGGER plan to destroy America, the backbone character of the American people and subjugate the world to a single financial system and remove FREEDOM if you do not cooperate with the world bank. Ultimately another step to the subjugation of the world.
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Carl Gundestrup Villain’s great plan
What I learned:
Not all villains work alone.
They do not share more than is absolutely necessary.
Control the media, and you can control the masses.
Useful idiots are essential for misdirection and coverup.
There is a myriad of ways to destroy a nation and individuals.
The end goal is to form a one-world financial system. One world government.
• 1) Healthcare — Control healthcare, and you control the people
• 2. Poverty – Increase the Poverty level as high as possible; poor people are easier to control and will not fight back if you are providing everything for them to live.
* 3) Debt — Increase the debt to an unsustainable level. That way, you are able to increase taxes which will produce more poverty.
4) Gun Control — Remove the ability to defend themselves from the Government. That way, you are able to create a police state.
• 5) Welfare — Take control of every aspect of their lives (Food, Housing, and Income).
• 6) Education — Take control of what people read and listen to — take control of what children learn in school.
• 7) Religion — Remove the belief in God from the Government and schools.
• 8) Class Warfare — Divide the people into the wealthy and the poor. This will cause more discontent, and it will be easier to take (Tax) the wealthy with the support of the poor.
• Create enough Chaos that people are begging the government to remove Americans’ individual rights and “Do what is best for the Masses.” Little knowing it is they who created the Chaos in the first place.
• Unsecured borders allow anyone in to burden the financial system further and allow criminals and terrorists and easily pass into America. Bail criminals out of jail. Constantly hammer on America is a racist state. Rewrite American history. Give money away, spend without limits, take control of education – Devalue human life in the name of freedom of choice. Gun Control – 1890 Wounded Knee. Twenty congressional medals of honor were awarded for disarming and killing between 150 -300 men, women, and children. 1991 Waco, Texas ATF murdered 76 men, women, and children – 1970 National guardsmen shot nine and killed four students at Kent State. 1963 Birmingham, Al police and fireman turned firehoses and dogs on unarmed blacks. IN 1946 Athens, Tennessee, the sheriff stole the ballot box, and World War 2 vets armed themselves and refused to put up with it.
• Cover up everything under the guise of “We’re just doing what is best for “America” and you. Make the whistleblowers appear as radical nut cases. Kill the whistleblowers and their families and friends.
In episode 1 “Sight Unseen,” Eric learns about a Wuhan whistleblower that gave all his information to a congressman and was later murdered. The congressman holds on to the evidence as leverage to save his life and his family. It was the congressman that Bill Hancock was supposed to kill. He drives the same car as Eric. Eric learns from the dying congressman about the file and gets it. It explains all about why Obama signed off on “Gain of Function Research” This “deliberative process” ended on Jan. 9, 2017, when the White House Office of Science and Technology set in motion the events that would lift the moratorium on funding later that year.
“Today, the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy (OSTP) is releasing ‘Recommended Policy Guidance for Departmental Development of Review Mechanisms for Potential Pandemic Pathogen Care and Oversight (P3CO).’ Adoption of these recommendations will satisfy the requirements for lifting the current moratorium on certain life sciences research that could enhance a pathogen’s virulence and/or transmissibility to produce a potential pandemic pathogen (an enhanced PPP). [Emphasis added.]
Issuance of this policy guidance concludes the deliberative process launched in October 2014 by OSTP and the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS).”
This stunning announcement received little or no press coverage. By that time, the media’s obsession with taking down Trump and painting him as an agent of Russia was dominating the news cycle.
The NIH’s decision to start funding GOF research again suddenly should have set off national alarms, especially since it ran counter to warnings from the scientific community. In a November 2015 report on GOF published in the science journal Nature, scientists concluded that “building chimeric viruses based on circulating strains [is] too risky to pursue, as increased pathogenicity in mammalian models cannot be excluded.”
The recommendation to end the moratorium also flew in the face of what Obama’s Homeland Security adviser, Lisa Monaco , considered “one of the gravest risks for the new administration”: the emergence of an “infectious disease.” The President’s Council of Advisers on Science and Technology similarly sent a letter to Obama just days after Trump’s victory warning him of the very real threat of biological attack. The 16-page letter explicitly warned that the “modification of pathogens to overcome existing immunity or to be resistant to available drugs.” In other words, GOF posed a serious threat to national security. Despite these warnings, the National Institutes of Health lifted the pause on GOF funding in December 2017 — conveniently placing responsibility for this unfortunate decision on Trump.
Just four days later, White House officials conducted a tabletop exercise with their incoming Trump administration counterparts. The topic? How to respond to “the worst influenza pandemic since 1918.”
The similarities of this fictitious scenario with the pandemic that would devastate the world less than three years later are staggering. During the White House exercise, participants were asked to imagine that a highly transmissible respiratory virus was already raging in London, Seoul, and Jakarta. Medical service providers in affected areas were overwhelmed and some travel bans had already been implemented in this hypothetical.
Little did they know that this hypothetical would soon become the world’s reality.
In China, a U.S. team of scientists led by Dr. Ralph Baric, a well-known University of North Carolina virologist and professor, and a Chinese team led by Dr. Shi Zhengli, the director of the Center for Emerging Infectious Diseases at the Wuhan Institute of Virology, better known as the “batwoman,” were collaborating on a project that is now well known. In the end, they “created a modified coronavirus that was shown to be able to latch on to human cells and replicate in lung cells, efficiently enough to cause a pandemic.”
The NIH’s quiet and inexplicable decision allowed then-Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases Dr. Anthony Fauci to direct funds to the Wuhan Institute of Virology, a lab known for its inadequate safety practices , where Baric and Zhengli’s COVID research was taking place. Keep in mind: Zhengli herself was an author of the report that had recently concluded the COVID experiments were “too risky to pursue.” Yet our government sent hundreds of thousands of dollars to the WIV anyway.
McCormick called this “Obama’s poison pill,” a characterization I initially considered to be alarmist. I’ve changed my mind. After looking at the timeline, I find it appropriate.
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Mastering the Thriller Assignment 3
Lead Characters and their world
Carl Gundestrup
Lead Characters:
Eric Neilsen: Hero
Norman Larusha: 1st Villain
Hidden Villains within the U.S. Government, Russia, China & Iran.
Cayla Amundsen: Influencer – disgruntled FBI agent
What I learned from this assignment: I looked at the main characters’ strengths, weaknesses, and flaws in detail. I began to realize that to create great characters, they needed traits that could be exploited, skills that make them capable, and emotions that make them relatable. This assignment also helped to add more layers to the M.I.S.
Concept: Eric Nielsen’s family is an unintended casualty of political crossfire. In his search for the truth, Eric becomes a relentless force in unraveling an international global conspiracy to destroy America and subjugate the world.
Opening Big Mystery: Why was a brain surgeon targeted for a mafia-style hit when all he did was rough up a serial killer that he had been researching his brain waves?
Big Intrigue: Who are the people ordering the hit through Norman Lurusha, and what dark secrets are they so afraid of that they are willing to kill a brain surgeon? Can Eric trust Cayla the disgruntled FBI agent who reveals his “accident” was actually a “hit?”
Big Suspense: What could Eric know or be involved in that someone wants him dead? Will Eric’s continued meddling get him killed? Or his wife? Will they try again? Who tried to kidnap Cayla, the FBI agent? Why? Is this a different issue than what is happening with Eric?
SUB WORLD: Cayla, the FBI agent, leads us to the world of dark politics within the FBI, what the FBI is doing outside the law, and introduces us to the mafia and other sinister characters. Later we learn of the Global conspiracy that threatens the US and the world.
Our hero is Eric Neilsen: mystery: Will he stay the course when he discovers the tremendous scope of the conspiracies he is unraveling and his chances of survival, let alone winning?
Intrigue: Does he have the tools and resources to succeed? Does he have the courage and determination as an individual fighting against world powers, their agents, and the traitors that abound in our own country?
Suspense: Can he survive almost hourly attempts on his life, extended family, Cayla, and individuals like Bill Hancock and his family from a myriad of sources?
Background for me: Eric has been better than anyone at almost everything he has ever tried. He is extremely religious and a constitutionalist. The Navy Seals pushed him well beyond his limits and showed him things about himself he did not know. He resigned his commission as a seal, deciding that he’d rather save lives than take lives, and patching up buddies was not something he wanted to do. His commanding officer was so angry with his decision that he did everything possible after graduation to say Eric washed out so the Navy would not pay for his medical degree. Eric’s fascination with the human brain and studying the inner workings of a serial killer appear on the surface to be his family’s demise.
The first Villain, Norman Larusha: Mystery: Norman has for decades kept himself insulated from the FBI, other agencies, organizations, and individuals. At first glance, Norman appears at the top of the food chain. But his early death in the story immediately tells us he is just a cog in a much larger machine.
INTRIGUE: How will his computer, files, and lists of contacts play out in the big picture?
Suspense: Who is so loyal to Larusha even after his death is determined to exact revenge on Eric? Is it a man who will fill his vacancy? A relative? A person with a motive other than revenge?
Cayla Amundsen, The FBI agent. Mystery: Her partner was killed. She is convinced the FBI could have prevented it and let the killer escape. She is willing to leave the FBI to bring the killer to justice. Who is trying to kidnap and kill her, and why?
Intrigue: In her lone wolf investigation, she stumbled upon Eric’s situation with a “hit” by Larusha. She introduces us to a scandal within the FBI, a boss we don’t know whose side he’s on, and activities within the bureau outside the law.
Suspense: Who wants to kill her? FBI? Mafia? Are they the same people that want Eric dead or others yet unknown?
Personal notes for me on Cayla. We know very little about her, and she is a big influence on Eric, and we are convinced she is until dark forces and situations make us question her loyalty, motives, and intent. Cayla is a drop-dead-gorgeous, tough woman of the world who is used to men begging for her attention. She runs into Eric, whose soul is owned by a wife who appears to be a vegetable. Cayla’s relationship with Eric’s wife, Catherine, will play a huge role in Eric’s life, his decisions, and the story.
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Carl Gundestrup.
What I have learned in this assignment?
This assignment has helped me make decisions on who the villains are, their plans, what they are willing to do to get Eric, and what Eric can do to them. It has shown me how I can stack the world against our hero Eric. It has given me a clearer sense of direction with the first film and reminded me how critical it will be to set everything up perfectly in the first film making the payoffs in the next two films more powerful. Depending on how I build the entire story and integrate the three segments, it could be a blockbuster.
DEATH TO AMERICA Episode 1 “SIGHT UNSEEN” Logline:
A brain surgeon battles global conspiracies using a device that can turn memories into video.
• Resourceful Hero: Eric Neilsen resigned his commission as a navy seal at graduation after deciding to become a brain surgeon. Ten years of Navy service provides Eric with a wealth of friends and help. His love of filmmaking in high school and college has given his research direction.
• Dangerous Villain: In the “DEATH TO AMERICA” trilogy, “Sight Unseen,” “A THOUSAND WORDS,” and “TRUTH BE TOLD,” Eric will face Villains from within the US government, China, Russia, and Iran. Each VILLAIN attacks America from differing angles and receives aid from sources within the US government. Individuals within each country/organizations also have tremendous incentives to kill Eric and his team.
• High Stakes: World Freedom – Steps: Make America insolvent. Create one world global economy – Create chaos in America with unfettered emigration, letting convicted felons out, etc.
• Life and Death Situation: Eric, his team, and the device he has created are threats to reveal the clandestine plans of Russia, China, Iran, and the traitors to the United States. Eric must be silenced at all costs, and there are multiple countries and individuals within countries whom all need Eric dead.
• The story is thrilling because it deals with real issues America and the world is currently facing and is a life-and-death situation with implications for every person in the world.
2. Tell us the Big M.I.S. of your story?
How do the villains plan to destroy America, and who are they all? Are they working in concert or individually? Who are the “freelance” players that also have a huge stake in Eric’s demise?
Open borders allow Iranian terrorists, with Russian assistance, to prepare and carry out the destruction of America’s infrastructure.
Russia and China use the internet to divide Americans, spy, and plant self-destructive ideals and false narratives.
China is stealing technology, buying up businesses and land while building advanced weapons and preparing for global domination.
The Big suspense intensifies as Eric and his team discover new plans and additional players. The stakes grow exponentially. But when Eric goes public with some of his discoveries, he is portrayed in the media as a nut case. Since they are having a hard time killing him, they discredit him while sending more and more assassins to silence him.
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“The Commuter” Action Thriller
What I learned from this assignment was how soft subtle setups offer a myriad of unexpected twists and options for twists. I had seen “The Commuter” before, so it was an excellent choice. I was able to focus on all the setups at the beginning and see how they fit. The financial stress, loss of job, the drinks at the bar, the shady friend, and the captain coming over set us up to wonder who the bad guy would be.
The BIg mystery was who was the person they wanted to kill and why did they want to kill her. What did she have, and what did she know?
The Big Intrique was why Liam Neeson was chosen and coerced into this position.
The Big suspense was how would Michael / Liam handle the situation. Would he go along? Would he balk? Would he fold when his family’s lives were on the line? Could he find the person? What would he do when he found them?
In my opinion, it was a perfect example of all the things you have been talking about. After the film is over, we still do not KNOW who the villain actually is. He is ruthless, and Liam was not the only person he controlled. I love that all the loose ends were tied up and that he got to nail the girl who helped set him up, to begin with. I REALLY like this film because I could see a sequel. I am not sure that the ultimate scandal in the film was big enough to warrant a second film. But in my show, I want to do a trilogy. This helped me see how I could end a film with a great payoff and still leave questions for the next story.
I thought, “The Commuter was ok the first time I saw it. I absolutely loved it this time, seeing all the conventions and twists at work. I appreciated and enjoyed soooo much more this time.
They totally tripled the stakes when Liam’s innocent friend was shoved in front of the bus. It instantly took the stakes to a completely different level. We now KNOW this is life and death for everyone when the villain is willing to kill an innocent.
Great assignment! Love it!
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AGREE, in which case, you Reply to this topic and include three things at the top of the page:
1. Carl Gundestrup
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3. Please leave the entire text below to confirm what you agree to.
OR
NOT AGREE, in which case, you hit “Reply to this topic” and type in the words “I’ll do the class privately.”
If you agree to the terms of the release form, then you can post your assignments into the group and your cohort can give feedback on them.
Also, if you don’t agree to this group confidentiality agreement, you’ll still need to sign an agreement that says you will keep the strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.
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I have been buried with issues with rentals I own and stuff and have been slow to get back to you. I’d love to exchange with you. I was 27 pages into the script when I started the course. It has been VERY difficult to follow the lessons and not get excited about actually writing the script. That is why I have failed abysmally in keeping it brief. It is actually NOTES TO MYSELF and I still have dozens of changes to make. – I’d love to hear your feedback and give you some too.
Day 14:
What I learned:I am trying to keep this mess as an outline for the class. But I am actually creating the rest of the script as an outline and writing myself notes as I go. I can’t quite just give the bare-bones story. I have soooo much stuff to clean up and add and Fix! This has been awesome! A new experience for me. I have always started writing and followed where the characters and story took me. I am not actually convinced this is right for my style. But time will tell. I love the idea of having a solid outline to work from and the end already in mind. In the past, my slam-bang finish showed up as progressed. The story came to a natural conclusion with all the loose ends tied up.
INT. MAX PRISON CELL - DAY
Brain surgeon / Navy seal dropout ERIC NEISLEN is questioning serial killer JOHN SALYER using a device that he has created. The device sends milli-volt electric impulses through a platinum conductor gripped in one hand to a stylist placed in a precise n acupuncture point in the other hand. The helmet measures and connects the frequency of the subject's brain waves using ultra- low-intensity gamma rays. The amplifier device in his briefcase raises the frequency power enough to produce images from the person's memory. The device also precisely measures brain activity, blood pressure, and heart rate like a typical lie detector. The images are seen as single-frame split-second images and occasional brief clips depending on the intensity of the connected memory. The images can be edited together to create an entire scene of the event. The stylist and conductor are designed to shock the subject if they drop below the top of the head. (In the script, we learned that it is very difficult for a liar to keep his story straight if he has to do two things at once. Avoiding being shocked provides the proper distraction to allow thoughts to be unguarded and increase the anxiety of being discovered.)
John extends a threat that he can't follow through on.
CLUE/FORESHADOWING.
From previous experience, Eric is prepared for John’s attack and responds with some payback. Eric zip-ties John to the bars and tapes the stylists into their proper locations. Eric asks questions regarding John’s murders. Images appear involuntarily, and Eric converses with John even though John is zip-tied to the cell bars through his mouth and unable to speak. We don’t actually see the images yet. (INTRIGUE – Are there images or is this just manipulation by Eric?)
EXT. GROCERY STORE PARKING LOT - NIGHT
BILL HANCOCK has a gambling debt. He is given a job. FBI agent CAYLA AMUNDSEN is watching from a distance.
INT. NEISLEN'S HOME - MORNING
Eric and 7yr/ old son Thor are SO excited about little Kimberly’s upcoming birth. – Eric and Thor are dancing at breakfast for Catherine. (Because of You, Neyo.) Thor graciously seats his mother. – In the car on the way to the airport for Catherine to see her mother. Thor starts, and Eric joins in (Ain’t no sunshine. Bill Withers) Suspense – forshadowing.
EXT. BUSY STREET - MORNING
Eric and Catherine see Bill Hancock driving a box truck through a red light. Eric is able to accelerate and save Catherine, but Thor is killed instantly. Moments later, Eric can see on Bill’s face, "This is a terrible mistake!"
INT. AMBULANCE WINDOW - MOMENTS LATER
Eric places his hands on Catherine’s head and prays as they drive away.
INT. HOSPITAL - DAY
Nine Navy seals, full dress uniform, civilian and combat clothes, Bobby - Cocoa Bean - Tufts - Duke - Tinker - Animal - Fork - Turbulent "Turb" kneel with Eric as he prays.
Eric tells his buddies that he gave Catherine a blessing, and he says she will live. A Doctor tells Bobby privately that the severe brain trauma, injuries, and the c-section, no way. Bobby says – “I’m not that close to God to know personally. But if Eric Neilsen says she’ll live. Trust me. She’ll live.”
INT. NORM LARUSHA'S STUDY - EVENING
Norm is told that Bill hit the wrong guy. Norm says what's he gonna do? Tell the cops he killed the wrong guy? Pay him 100K and tell him Harrison will get him off on manslaughter, and he'll be out six months with behavior two years max."
INT. SPECIAL AGENT JAMES SHAYDIE'S OFFICE - DAY
Cayla confronts her FBI boss about why they are not investigating the death of her partner Mark Lopez, the Neilsen's and Norman Larusha's involvement. She is told they need hard proof and want the guy who hired Larusha.
EXT. GRAVESIDE - DAY Eric buries Thor with all his friends and family.
INT. NEISLEN'S HOME - EVENING
Hot early 40s hospital administrator Sarah Carrion wants Eric as trophy husband and his device. Unbeknownst to Sarah, her get-on- with-life talk convinces Eric that he must make peace with Bill Hancock.
INT. LONG-TERM CARE FACILITY - NIGHT Eric tells Catherine he needs her strength to forgive Bill. A tiny tear in Catherine's eye reveals she is trapped in her body but awake.
EXT. TRUCKING COMPANY Eric's forgiveness and Bill's genuine remorse create a bond. INT. KRAV MAGA GYM - NIGHT
With the fog lifted a bit, Eric returns to Krav Maga classes. FBI agent CAYLA AMUNDSEN tries to get close to Eric as her Krav partner. Eric walks away.
INT. DINER - LATER
Eric is at a diner across the street when he sees a guy follow Cayla. SUSPENSE
EXT. STREET BY THE GYM - MOMENTS LATER
Eric saves Cayla.
INT. NORM LARUSHA'S STUDY - NIGHT
Mafia-type “fixer” NORMAN LARUSHA, who set up Eric’s “accident,” learns of Bill and Eric meeting. Norman makes a call SUSPENSE.
INT. ERIC’S HOME –
Eric learns Thor’s death and Catherine’s demise was a planned hit. MYSTERY – Who is after Cayla, why, and are they Eric’s enemies too? Cayla leaves. Eric calls Seal buddy “Coco Bean,” and explains what he’s learned, and asks for backup. (All seals are now on alert and take turns doing surveillance from a distance throughout the show.)
INT. LONG-TERM CARE FACILITY - EVENING
Cayla tells Catherine, “Sorry – but I’m takin’ your man.” Cayla freaks out when she touches Catherine and discovers that Catherine is “Awake and in there.” They connect! COOL MYSTERY.
FBI HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT
Cayla returns to the FBI to see if she can find what Mark knew that got him killed. FBI boss James Shaydie won’t tell her anything. Is he to be trusted? Or is he part of the problem? INTRIQUE
Cayla learns through an FBI friend Sally Crampton that Eric was booted shortly before Seal graduation because he attacked his C.O. The Navy avoided a black eye & Eric’s court martial by allowing Eric to become a doctor and removing his C.O. from his duties. MYSTERY
INT. COUNTY JAIL - DAY
Eric learns from Cayla that Bill’s attorney sent him back to jail. Eric posts bail and brings Bill and his family to his house for safety.
INT. ERIC'S HOME - EVENING Bill tells Eric he was only told a time and place to hit a
black Mercedes. (clue to the real target) MYSTERY
INT. NORM LARUSHA'S STUDY - DAY
Norm is ticked that Bill is alive, Cayla’s involved, and he does not have Eric’s device. Norm calls in “professionals.” SUSPENSE
INT. ERIC STUDY - NIGHT
Bill has been forced to text their location to Larusha’s men, or his son TYSON, 7 (who was kidnapped only hours before Eric brought them to his house) – will be killed. SUSPENSE
Eric gets a text from Tufts that the house is surrounded while talking to Bill.
Bill confesses to Eric Just as the laser dot from a sniper rifle lands on Eric's head. Eric ducks, a bullet hits the chair, and Eric goes postal.
Eric grabs a gun - Runs into the living room, and shoots through the front window at the sniper in a van in front of the house.
EXT. ERIC'S HOME - CONTINUOUS
Eric dives out the window and shoots two more guys on the lawn before going after the sniper in the suburban who shot through his office window. Eric shoots through the car doors hitting the driver and the sniper.
Eric has Catherine watch the bad guys while he puts things in order.
INT. ERIC’S HOME – MOMENTS LATER
Eric gathers Bill, Stephanie, and the girls. He takes Bill and Stephanie’s phones and credit cards and gives them an envelope full of cash. He has them take Catherine’s car to Rockville, buy a decent 4-wheel drive vehicle for cash from an individual, and not register it. “Lock the keys in Catherine’s car at the Walmart by the highway. Buy your phones with cash and take your family to this address. I will bring Tyson there. Here’s my card. Emergency only. You call me, and they have a way to find you. Email me your phone number when you get to where you are going.”
EXT. ERIC’S HOME – MOMENTS LATER
Eric forces the wounded sniper to lead him to Larusha. SUSPENSE EXT. NORM LARUSHA’S HOME – NIGHTHow to get in? Eric orders pizza. Susie, the Pizza girl, leaves a pizza on the doorstep with a note from Eric inside. Eric and Cayla rush Norm and get control of Norm and all his information and finances.
INT. NORM LARUSHA'S HOME - CONTINUOUS
Eric uses his device on Norm. Norm tells them of the implant that was forced on him at the base of his skull. Eric offers a trade - AFTER they get Tyson back. They get Tyson back. Eric negotiates with Larusha to get ALL his information in exchange for keeping most of his money and fleeing the country.
INT. HOSPITAL - LATER
Eric rushes Norm to the hospital and saves his life. Larusha helps some and disappears. Eric checks to make sure Tyson has not been implanted with a device like Norm’s. They take Tyson’s shoes off – where the tracking device is.
INT. MYSTERIOUS OFFICE – NIGHT
A woman’s hand picks up the phone. She is told Larusha’s gone. She says she knows. She is told Eric has connected with the congressman. She says good. They will lead us to his leak. INTRIGUE
INT. LARUSHA'S HOME - DAY
Eric finds Catherine in his bed, via Cayla. Tyson was left with Nurse Strong. Cayla tells Eric that Catherine cannot open her eyes or speak, but she totally knows what’s going on around her. Eric and Catherine reconnect. Cayla and Catherine “talk” about the reconnection. FUN MYSTERY
From Eric's device, he learns Larusha does not know who exactly but believes someone way up in the US government wants his device. Larusha was told black Mercedes. Eric has learned that Sarah Carrion contacted Norm. Whom is she working with? Why do
people in the state department want Eric’s device, and why are they willing to kill for it? MYSTERY – INTRIGUE.
INT. FBI HEADQUARTERS - DAY Cayla uses SALLY CRAMPTON FBI associate to check the street
video of Eric’s accident. It’s gone! Who took it? MYSTERY
EXT. BUSY STREET - MORNING
Cayla sits at the intersection to wait for a Black Mercedes. She gets the license of Congressman Brad Phillips. INTRIQUE
INT. BRAD PHILLIPS'S HOME - EVENING
Eric explains to Brad how his family was destroyed. Brad says that "message" was intended for him. Brad has an "insurance file," "they" don't want it exposed, and killing a congressman is a problem. Brad reveals to them Jermain Davenport, Brad's former college roomie, and a senior CIA analyst. Brad sets up an appointment with Billy the Bluebird.
INT. JERMAIN’S CABIN - DAY Jermain leaves his family, goes to a convenience store, and uses
the restroom. SUSPENSE
INT. CONVENIENCE STORE RESTROOM – DAYEric and Jermain talk. Jermain tells Eric the story of Billy the bluebird. Jermain says he'll get them a copy, be patient. Good feelings, bad feelings.
EXT. CONVENIENCE STORE – MOMENTS LATER
Jermain exits the store, looks around, and gets in his car.
A small drone a thousand feet up, a mile away, descends into the woods. MYSTERY SUSPENSE
INT. NORM LARUSHA'S HOME - DAY Eric calls and asks Coco to return Tyson to his family.
Cayla and Eric sift through Norm's stuff. Cayla learns from Eric that his C.O. was trying to kill him. Fight, flight or die were his options.
INT. NURSE STRONG'S HOME - NIGHT
Coco shows up for lunch to meet Tyson. Nurse Strong and Coco hit it off when Strong sees the sweetness of this gargantuan military guy with a terrified little boy. Coco immediately teaches Tyson about being grateful and respectful to women and how his family needs him to be a man.
EXT. BAD NEIGHBORHOOD - NIGHT
Jermain's body is dropped in an alley. Jermain's car is parked some distance from the body.
INT. BRAD'S CONGRESSIONAL OFFICE - DAY
Congressman Brad Phillips tells Eric and Cayla that Jermain is dead. Brad tells them Jermain was mugged in a bad neighborhood and framed as a cheating husband. Brad has proof that it is a lie. INTRIGUE
INT. CONGRESSMAN'S HOME - NIGHT
Cayla and Eric are there to get copies of the congressman's files.
They learn that Brad Phillips told Jermain to investigate the U.S. withdrawal from Afghanistan. Brad only has notes and a few pages of what Jermain discovered. Did Jermain have hard proof? Did he hide it? If so, Where?
Brad tells them that Jermain found a connection between US President Jeff Baldwin and the axis of evil China, Russia, Iran, Pakistan, and the Taliban. The axis is blackmailing the president. But only Jermain has the proof, and he's dead.
Eric says 'They don't know that we don't have the proof." The Congressman is shot dead by a sniper right in front of them. Car Chase:
Cayla and Eric run for their lives. FBI & CIA are in pursuit. Tufts and several other seals have been watching from a distance, disrupt the pursuit. Eric runs to Bobby's place and changes cars, and they head for Coco’s place in Louisiana.
INT. LARUSHA’S HOME - DAY
Turb is protecting Catherine and preparing her to go to Louisiana. The villain's minions kill Turb and take Catherine.
INT. ERIC’S GETAWAY CAR - DAY The villain tries to squeeze Eric in a text.
“Do you really expect me to believe you will let us go after we give you all our intel? Food for thought – You touch my wife, who can’t open her eyes or talk – and Every TV – Radio station, and news outlet on the planet as well as aborigines in the deepest part of Australia, the Amazon, and Asia, will know every detail of what you have done and what you’re planning. NAMES AND FACES!
You have 24 hours to return Catherine to the assisted living center where she was first placed. If she is not. You better make absolutely certain I'm dead. Because there is no place on this planet where you can hide. And if you dare to place a bomb in her like the one, you did on Norm. You're dead! I will have nothing to do with the rest of my life but hunt you. 24 hours or YOU and your minions will be “The Daily Planet's front-page story!”
EXT. GEORGIA HIGHWAY - DAY
Coco and Tyson's road trip is fun. Coco is told by Bobby they are being followed at a distance of about 100 miles.
EXT. GEORGIA TRUCK STOP - DAY
Coco finds the link in the shoes and puts them on a semi at a truck stop.
EXT. GEORGIA WOOD - EVENING
Coco takes a detour to make sure they are safe. He teaches Ty to shoot a .22. Dress a wound. Build a fire. Catch a fish. Set a snare. Burp the alphabet.
EXT. GEORGIA HIGHWAY - DAY
Coco is stopped by a pretend cop intent on killing Coco and getting the boy.
INT. SUBURBAN - DAY
Ty hides in the compartment under the rear seat of the suburban that Coco built.
INT. GEORGIA SIDE ROAD – MOMENTS LATER
Coco is tipped off by the cop directing them onto a side road where they will be unseen. Coco tazes the cop. He ties him up and throws him in the trunk with the dead officer’s body and the murder weapon and calls 911.
EXT. COCO’S DOME HOME LOUISIANA - DAY
Coco built a dome home from a grain silo roof DEEP in the Bayou. Bill, Stephanie, and the girls are enjoying their vacation. All the food and everything they need is right there.
Eric gets a call from the Congressman's office telling him he got a book from Amazon. Eric sends Duke to get the book.
EXT. CONGRESSMAN’S HOME - NIGHT
Duke is shot by a bad guy and gets the book. Fork saves Duke in a wild chase and firefight, but the bad guys get the documents and get away.
INT. TINKER’S HOME - LATER
The seals plan to bust into FBI headquarters, take the book back, and send it out on the internet. Eric calls and says slow down. What did it look like? Is it the ONLY one? Jermain seems smarter than that. Was that just a pinch? Bait, to draw them out? Pretty insecure way to send such an important mess of documents. Duke said they look like originals. Really? And how would Jermain get Originals? Duke took shots on his phone before he left the congressman's office. Whoa! Really?
Fork checks Eric's mail. He finds a thumb drive from a bogus company selling Thumb drives. It has ALL the real documents.
Seals learn Russian - Chinese and Middle Eastern partners. The number of times Obama and the Muslim Brotherhood had meetings - Gain of Access Funding - Covid-19 Chinese documents.
Eric discovers that the secretary of state, the president, and many others are being blackmailed or are open supporters of a socialist takeover.
That is why the state department took charge of the withdrawal from Afghanistan when they had NO skills or expertise? They were under orders from China & the Taliban? Proof – The date Sept 11th – giving up Bagram – 85 billion in equipment to terrorists AND negotiating the withdrawal when we could have gone out with our heads up at any time we wanted. Hilary’s prevention of “FBI profiling terrorists.” Top secret e-mails on her server. FBI false Russia scandal – Benghazi.
EXT SOUTH CAROLINA - DAY
Car Chase: Eric and Cayla are accused of killing the congressman, Norman Larusha and Jermain. Eric and Cayla leave the hideout to protect Bill and his family. They are spotted in a deserted corner of Myrtle beach. Eric and Cayla are captured by the FBI.
EXT. CITY OF MYRTLE BEACH – DAY They make a public spectacle so they can't be secretly murdered. INT. NEW YORK TIMES – DAY
A Times journalist gets an e-mail from Tinker, and the SEALS reveal everything. The world is abuzz, and the State Department and the Whitehouse call it lies and hate speech. The e-mails, phone transcripts, and documents say otherwise.
INT. COURTROOM VIRGINIA - DAY
Eric sets up a chance for all the Whitehouse and state department people named to come forward and prove their innocence.
Eric is forced to set up a demo of his device. The CIA is to "inspect it." To see that it is not a fake or has planted evidence. Eric is concerned they will sabotage it. He has a backup that is untried.
Eric's device does NOT do audio. Eric can only SHOW the people that the politicians said they never met or knew each other to support his allegations and documents.
Minions mess with Eric's device, and NOW it gets audio, and they are nailed! Eric is in tears as he believes God has nailed them!
Facebook and Twitter call it lies, hate speech, and conspiracy.
The American people are not buying. They are calling for the heads of all involved. The justice department is in it, so who will do the investigation? What is left of Congress calls for a special investigative committee.
Eric finds a letter in the limousine as he gets in. "American leadership discredited and destroyed. Confidence in the government is at zero. Rioting in the streets. Marshall law declared within days. Two years ahead of schedule. Thank you for your assistance.”
After the credits – scene from the next film. Montage: Violence in the streets all across America. Twitter and Facebook show buildings being burned. People are being shot by the military and police. The President declares Marshall law. Banks are shut down, and the government takes complete control and enforces a nationwide curfew.