Giles
Forum Replies Created
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Charles Ferrell’s Relationship Map
What I learned doing this assignment is how complexity can be so simple.
Scarlett Taylor,Dr. Les White,Vasilli Petrov,Lilly Clark
Relationship Surface ,Colleage,adversary,sister
Relationship Common Ground,”both seek restoration, intelligent and moral”,”smart, care about their children,”,”same parents, sisters”
Relationship Conflict,”Scar disapproves of his addictions, Dr. White resents being judged”,He delivers the threat that the parent crime family will not let her leave,”Lilly hates her life and wants Scar’s freedom, Scar is judged against Lilly by their parents”
Relationship History,”Both come from medical background, Scar has not lost her license and slipped in making a comment about his”,He keeps her locked into this life of crime with a false threat. Secretly he is jealous that her child is still alive.,”Lilly does everything right on the surface. Being the source of judgement against Scar. Lilly wants to dump the pressure of being “”miss perfect”” for the fun life she thinks Scarlett has.”
Relationship Subtext,unspoken connection over their life mistakes,They are both loving parents ,Major competition and jealousy runs both ways
Relationship ARC,from mutal judgement to mutual respect,Near hatred to Understanding via mutual fear,”Social, tolerant, friendly…..dangerous exposure, vengeful “
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Charles Ferrell Character Emotions
What I learned doing this assignment is to find the conflict gold between the characters.
Scarlett Taylor
A. Role in the show: Main CharacterB. Unique Purpose / Expertise: phlebotomist/ lab technicianC. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface? She is an upstanding citizen in the community, religious parents, she is a role model parent herself contrasting her dead-beat ex. While being part of an Organ Cartel.D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? Illegal organ transplants, manipulating donor lists, scamming rich recipients E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? By the end of the first season, she enjoys the money and bumping poor people up the transplant listF. Empathetic: Why do we care? She never had to be a part of this world; her son was falsely diagnosed. By the time it was discovered, she was locked into this world. She would like her old life back but the money is good.G. Situational: Scarlett hopes to earn her way out / Fear: Arrested or DieH. Motivation: Wants control over her life / Needs moneyI. Mask: Base Negative Emotion Shame / Public Mask People pleaserJ. Weaknesses self-sabotageK. Triggers Rejection/ abandonmentL. Coping Mechanism Fight back, lash out
Focus on wealthy dirt bags and have recognition that some innocent poor people get transplants legally
Instead
Dr. Lester White
A. Role in the show: Intelligent confidant, trusted advisor to the underworld for ScarlettB. Unique Purpose / Expertise: SurgeonC. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface? Gambling & Substance abuse problemD. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? Performing illegal surgeries without a license.E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? Try to expose the operation in exchange for immunity and his license back.F. Empathetic: Why do we care? Wasted potential. Gives sound psychological & life advice to Scarlett, he cares about her G. Situational: Hopes for redemption / Fear: Arrested or DieH. Motivation: Wants freedom / Needs respectI. Mask: Base Negative Emotion Worthless / Public Mask Important PersonJ. Weaknesses addictionK. Triggers disrespectL. Coping Mechanism Addiction
Lilly Clark
A. Role in the show: Scarlett’s SisterB. Unique Purpose / Expertise: Moral and ethical conscience, she is what everyone wants Scarlett to be. C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface? She hates her life and the expectations everyone has for it. She wishes she could make mistakes like Scarlett and no one would notice.D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? She wants excitement in her life and thinks Scarlett is her access to it.E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? Tries to weasel and leverage her way into the secret life of Scarlett (she has no idea how deep it goes)F. Empathetic: Why do we care? She has it all together, while under the constant pressure of living a life she doesn’t want.G. Situational: Hopes for excitement / Fear: to be exposed as a fraudH. Motivation: Wants freedom / Needs controlI. Mask: Base Negative Emotion Sadness / Public Mask Picture PerfectJ. Weaknesses jealousyK. Triggers being ignoredL. Coping Mechanism Binge eating, Purging
Vasilli Petrov
A. Role in the show: Antagonistic partner of scarlettB. Unique Purpose / Expertise: Organ Broker, Sales, C. Intrigue: What is secret beneath the surface? He is being controlled by a higher level of criminal organization. He is not in control like he leads on.D. Moral Issue: What moral boundaries are they crossing? He is organizing the entire operation E. Unpredictable: What will they do next? He is a risk taker and enjoys the excitement of pushing the boundaries. He has nothing to lose.F. Empathetic: Why do we care? His own child died waiting on a transplant list.G. Situational: Hopes for excitement / Fear: to be exposed as a fraudH. Motivation: Wants Power / Needs forgivenessI. Mask: Base Negative Emotion Guilt / Public Mask BullyJ. Weaknesses feeling vulnerableK. Triggers losing controlL. Coping Mechanism Manipulate, lie
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Charles Ferrell’s Three Circles of Characters 2
What I learned doing this assignment is just how many characters we generate, as we follow the main characters journey.
My Story
· Main Characters Circle
o Scarlett Taylor
o Dr. Lester White – Surgeon, with a few habitual issues and no license
o Vasilli Petrov – Organ Broker
o Lilly Clark – Sister has it all together do gooder
· Connected Circle
o Lewis Clark – Brother in law
o Pilot – this is what he calls turning it around, from being a drug smuggler
o Parents- religious to a fault
o Child – requires organ transplant
o Ex Husband – Dead beat dad
o Head of Security – ex football player
o Computer Nerd (donor list)
o Scarlett’s Boss – useless when needed but full of nosey questions
· Environment Circle
o Hospital staff
o Patients
o Police
o Co-Workers
o Illegal transplant staff
o Money people
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Charles Ferrell’s Three Circles of Characters
What I learned doing this assignment is just how many characters we see as we follow the main characters journey.
The Americans
· Main Characters Circle
o Philip Jennings – On mission for Russia but is falling for his American life.
o Elizabeth Jennings – Staunchly dedicated to the mission.
o Stan Beeman – Driven to succeed at any cost, highly suspicious of everyone.
· Connected Circle
o Paige Jennings – Daughter
o Henry Jennings – Son
o Sandra Beeman
o Chris Amador – Stans Partner
o Martha Hanson – FBI Mole
o General Zhukov
o Frank Gaad
o Agent Bartholomew
· Environment Circle
o FBI Agents
o KGB Agents
o Russian embassy staff
o US government officials
o School kids & Parents
o Travel Agency staff
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Charles Ferrell’s 5 Star Model
What I learned doing this assignment is to notice that a good pilot hits all the marks.
<div>The Americans</div>
Big Picture Hooks
Ask this: What is the big hook of this show?
Normal looking suburban married couple, with kids who are KGB agents
Amazing and Intriguing Character
Ask this: What makes these main characters intriguing and interesting?Elizabeth is loyal almost to a fault to Mother Russia, Phillip is enthralled with American life.
Empathy / Distress
Ask this: What situation causes us to feel both empathy and distress for this character?Their children were born Americans.
They must endure and go along with everything pro American and anti- Russian.
They must contain their abilities to kill or harm others in personal conflicts ( mission over personal feelings)
Their new neighbor is FBI counterintelligence
Phillip kills the defector for Elizabeth.
Phillip injured a child molester.
Elizabeth was raped during her training.
Layers / Open Loops
Ask this: What questions are created by this first episode that can only be answered by watching the entire season?How will the FBI and American government step up the war on the KGB spies?
Will they defect or remain on the mission?
Will they be discovered by their nieghbor?
Will Elizabeth’s handler make her kill Phillip or end the mission otherwise?
Inviting Obsession
Ask this: How does this pilot create the need to see every single episode?Personal empathy for the characters.
Is their relationship a bigger draw than the mission?
Will their children find out?
They both maintain affairs as part of the mission, how much further will they go for the mission?
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I am ready to exchange, I have a 91 page draft exported as a pdf.
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Charles Ferrell’s solved scene problems
What I learned doing this assignment is to see more doors open for me in how I view my work. I find myself going back and forth between the last lesson of Character problems and Scene problems, they feed each other well.
1. Weak characters – Gaining a clearer focus on the characters emotional wounds, this is showing up in reviewing scenes.
2. Building Arc’s – In reviewing scene arc’s I have now added some additional smaller scenes driven by the arc of the previous or next scene.
3. Scene structure – I have re-ordered the structure of some scenes and am gaining greater clarity in the flow between scenes.
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Charles Ferrell’s Solved Character problems
What I learned doing this assignment is to evaluate how or if each characters wound, or motivation shows up. In that I altered some scenes, added scenes, and moved some character intro’s up.
Protagonist I delved into the wound more but also gave him more initial confidence to provide more contrast with the inciting incident.
Antagonist change agent I began to work in dialogue and more direct interaction with the protagonist and less implied.
Antagonist enemy I began to work on showing his positive side and that he evolved into the enemy out of his own fear, weakness and not pure evil, he is human also.
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Charles Ferrell’s Solved Structural Problems
What I learned doing this assignment is the clarity I have gained about my protagonist. We are getting to know each other better and now the story is evolving as a direct result.
Concept: Duncan Smaul a university teaching student and PhD candidate in history, all of which is disrupted by the ghost of a little girl. She drives him to discover a long-hidden secret, including her tragic death, under a local lake. His life and his future begin to unravel. Duncan is torn between doing nothing at the risk of losing his mind or risking his entire future to uncover the truth.
Main Conflict: Unknown to him, his recent & ancient past is showing up in the form of the little girl’s ghost and is slowly driving him insane, headlong into a direct collision course with Professor Winfield and his future.
· Old Ways:
· Duncan is a firm believer in planning, structure, and trust in the system.
· Only believes in facts and what he can put his hands or eyes on.
· Has no interest in the supernatural or conspiracy theories?
· New Ways:
· Is being guided by the supernatural
· Open to possibility beyond known facts.
· Willing to fight the system.
2. Fill in each of these with the answers you have right now.
Act 1: He believes in and trusts the system; everything has a plan and work the plans forward toward completing his PhD.
Opening: Duncan fails to deliver his PhD thesis theme to the board, embarrassing the head of the history department. He hesitates due to a strange feeling, which he discovers later is the influence of the little Asian girl.
Inciting Incident: Duncan begins to be haunted by the little girl by day and in his nightmares about a secret internment camp, covered up with a local lake. He begins to feel the battle between what he wants a PhD and what he needs the truth about the camp, the little girl and why him?
Turning Point: He is pulled into the chancellor’s office and questioned if his conspiracy theories are part of a theme idea/theory or is his mental state questionable (he’s not sure himself). It is suggested that he see a therapist.
Act 2:
Going outside the facts or bucking the system was never him. Now he has triggered Winfield, and he is caught in the middle between him and the emerging truth with no turning back.
New plan: Put the incidents behind him and work to get back on track, get back into the system.
Plan in action: He does what he thinks the chancellor suggested and interrupts the science phd board to declare his history theme about the secret camps. The supervising Regent reluctantly accepts, putting him at further odds with Prof Winfield who is not present and was involved in the camp.
Midpoint Turning Point: The chancellor suspends Duncan’s teaching position for going over his and Winfield’s head to the Regent and his threatens his PhD candidacy. Forces him to start seeing a staff therapist as a condition to regain status.
Act 3:
Rethink everything
All he has worked for is on the line and yet he still cannot prove why. Find the truth, about the camp and about Winfield’s anger.
New plan
He buys a fish finder with a side scan sonar unit.
He steals a boat and begins to scan the lake for evidence himself night after night, returning it before sunrise. His buddy refuses to help the second night, his girlfriend leaves him due this erratic behavior and him getting suspended without telling her.
He returns to the lake and is arrested and beaten by fake cops, he spots the professor driving away from the area
New insight
Prof Winfield knows something more; his involvement is bigger than workplace embarrassment. He is out to destroy him and continue the coverup, this is real!
Turning Point: He returns to the university, exhausted, dirty, and beaten to find he is fired from the university and kicked out of the PHD program. His university housing is taken away jobless, homeless, and alone.
Act 4: Nothing left to lose and the truth to gain. Stop at nothing!
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict
A witness of the camps with evidence comes forward as patient of his girlfriend, she brings the evidence to him (he’s not crazy). With students help he discovers Winfield in one of the pictures, he hatches a plan to expose him, expose the existence of the camp.
His buddy has an idea and gains access to a local construction site backhoe. He digs a massive hole in the lakes levee, flooding part of the town and major highway. the news helicopters covering the story now can see the foundations of a large multibuilding complex in the mud. The interviewer sent to visit the witness calls into the tv station and fill in the missing information. At the same time a student has slipped a fake copy of a university new story to the chancellor, citing the university as complicit in suppression of the truth.
Resolution
Professor Winfield is confronted by Duncan as the story unfolds on TV at school, after which the prof commits suicide. The university wanting to be on the right side of history, restores Duncan’s status. He is named director of a new University Historical Archives center. In hypnosis with his staff psychologist, it is revealed that he was the little Asian girl in a past life.
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Charles Ferrell’s Filled in Missing Scenes
I added several scenes and more detail to existing, mostly focused on more establishing the old normal, relationships, ways of being with various people and also daily routine. This is to give the viewer more material to help recognize the arc. The two below are samples, so far I have added an additional 8 pages of material.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – MIDDAY
Beginning: we meet some other staff, make reference to missing morning news on the lounge tv.
Middle: staff mentions they heard about yesterday, and how much of an ass Winfield can be.
End: Winfield swings by and tells Duncan he must stop by his office for a chat. We see Duncan’s demeanor change.
INT.PROFFESOR WINFIELDS OFFICE – AFTERNOON
Beginning: sits him down for a serious talk, references being embarrassed by his unpreparedness in front of the Regent.
Middle: I need you to teach the pre-req’s, he refuses to lower himself to non history major’s.
End: Duncan mentions he previous subject for his theme and Winfield seems accepting of that.
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Charles Ferrell’s Act 4 Resolution
What I learned doing this assignment is to not only show the outer changes due to the inner changes but to reveal a hidden question to be answered.
ACT 4
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM – SAME TIME
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Morning Mr. Jenkins, you have couple of bags of fluid in you. You should be feeling a little better.
MR. JENKINS
I am, thank you much better, sorry to be trouble again
HITOMI NAKAMURA
No trouble at all, you sound better and by the way this is kinda my job. So, can I ask you a question?
MR. JENKINS
Sure, I owe you that at least I imagine.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
When you came in last night you were mostly mumbling but at one point you called me Aiko?
Mr.Jenkins physically reacts to the name, pulls back slightly and appears uncomfortable.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Is Aiko someone we can call for you? A friend, a family memb.
MR. JENKINS
(the normally respectful Jenkins, interrupts her) No, you can’t call her (looks away from the Dr. and is holding back tears)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
(confused) I don’t mean to upset you but you called me Aiko and talked about candy and said you were sorry. If its a loved one you lost, we have really good therapists I can get.
MR. JENKINS
I shouldn’t have said that name and I am sorry (tearing up a little more)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
No need to apologize for calling me the wrong name, when you were incoherent.
MR. JENKINS
No, I’m sorry, I need to apologize to you and your people
HITOMI NAKAMURA
My people? Sir, I’m from Seattle, I doubt you even know my family
MR. JENKINS
Not your family, your people, Japanese people. (he looks around the room)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I’m really confused sir
MR. JENKINS
The box, I need the box
Hitomi gets up out of curiosity picks up the tattered old file box and sets it on the bed. He begins to rifle through papers and pulls out old pictures.
MR. JENKINS
I live down near the lake, well used to be in the forest before there was a lake. I used to hunt and when I couldn’t find game, I’d carry my old brownie and take pictures. Develop them myself at home, I did recon photography in the war.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
You don’t need to apologize for being in the War.
MR. JENKINS
No, let me finish. After I was discharged and sent home, I was hunting and found something in the woods. A camp, military prison camp. What I found was Japanese families being held there, this was after the war was over.
He hands her old photos taken from the brush but faintly showing Japanese families behind a large fence with razor wire and complex of buildings inside the fence line.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I see (slowly flipping through photos)
MR. JENKINS
I became obsessed with it, returning, observing never seeing any prisoners being discharged to go home. I noticed one area near the fence line where the children would play in the dirt. So at night, I timed the guard patrol, snuck to the fence line and threw wrapped hard candy into the dirt area.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
That was thoughtful
MR. JENKINS
No, it was cowardly. I was willing to keep returning with candy and let that make me feel better (he starts to cry again and looks down at his hands) but not willing to take action.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Did you say this was near the lake?
MR. JENKINS
Its dead in the middle of the lake, the deepest section. That shallow lake is a coverup!
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Do you mind if I borrow these? (holding up the pictures) It may not be too late for you to help.
MR. JENKINS
Keep them if it helps at all
INT.COFFEE SHOP – MID MORNING
Tattered and defeated, Duncan walks into the coffee shop alone, leaving a trail of dried mud behind him with the notices still crumpled in hand. He continues to read the notice and the waitress is taking longer than normal. She finally comes with two coffee cups only one has coffee in it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I only need one
WAITRESS
You are gonna need two and I should bring you a broom also (pointing at the trail he left)
DUNCAN SMALLS
Sorry, I didn’t realize
WAITRESS
Oh well, I guess its ok
Hitomi comes flying through the front door of the coffee shop, the waitress sees her then turns and pours the other cup
WAITRESS
I told you so..(then walks away)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I don’t know how but you were right (spreading the photographs out on the table) You look like hell, what happened?
DUNCAN SMALLS
(still in shock to see her, he slowly puts down the notice in his hand and looks at the photo’s)
Where did you get these?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
A patient, who is also a witness. You look like you lost a fight?
DUNCAN SMALLS
That I did, now I think I maybe winning this war. (he singles out one photo that shows a solider clearly in uniform) Who is this? I can almost read his name.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I don’t know, I didn’t look that closely at them. I was just in shock that it all lined up with your dreams.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Wait, how did the waitress know you were coming?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I treated her son last year for a football injury, we exchanged numbers then. I called and ask if she had seen you this morning.
Duncan takes a sip of coffee, while lost in thought and his swollen lip causes him to dribble.
DUNCAN SMALLS
How long will your patient be in the hospital?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I don’t know that I have reason to keep him past today.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Can you make one up? Buy some time and can he have visitors, can you get him to talk about it to anyone else?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I could probably keep him for observation for another day or two much more than that. I think at this point he is willing to talk, at least as a favor for me, why?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Its a stretch but I have an idea.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I thought seeing these would give you,, I don’t know something like closure, maybe write about it and get your job back and be done with the rest of the nonsense. Get your old life back.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(Duncan takes a beat, thinking deeply) This is so much bigger than my job or any thesis. I had time to think this morning. I have spent most of my life trying to somehow make my dead parents proud, spending the currency of my future to pay off a debt I thought I owed to my past. I don’t know if its the Universe, or destiny but I now have been given an opportunity, a purpose if you will, a chance to make a difference. Something bigger than myself.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Wow, I have been waiting to meet this guy in front of me. So no, more
DUNCAN SMALLS
So, is your patient reliable?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
He is an elderly man with dementia, not exactly witness stand material if that’s what you mean.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Can you keep him for another 24 to 48 hours and if I send someone to talk to him, keep him in his right mind.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I can keep him physically there and hydrated but no promises on being lucid.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Ok, do that, hold him, keep him alert and I’ll get someone over there to get his story
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Who are you sending?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know yet but I gotta go see some students.
He gathers up the photos and puts the one of the solider in his shirt pocket. Runs out of the coffee shop.
INT.CLASSROOM – DAY
Double doors fly open and Duncan bursts into the class he once taught and locates the two students pointing.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I need you and you outside for a minute.
SUBSTITUTE TEACHER
You can’t just disturb my lecture
DUNCAN SMALLS
I just did
STUDENT 1
Yeah, he just did
DUNCAN SMALLS
You still on the school newspaper? And do you have access to the photolab or equipment?
STUDENT 1
Yeah, sure. I have access to editing software and scanners. Why whats up, want our help now?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Holding up the photograph of the soldiers in front of the camp, while pulling others out of his pockets.
This is whats up! I need you guys to scan these and clean them up. If you can, see if we can read those uniform names.
INT.UNIVERSITY MEDIA LAB – MOMENTS LATER
One student is scanning while the other is enhancing the scans as they show up in the computer. In some they can clearly see the razor wire a top the fences and asian adults and children inside, this is obviously a prison.
STUDENT 1
Two of the soldiers are turned, you can only see partial names but one. Let me see if I increase the contrast and zoom just a little more..HOLY SHIT!
DUNCAN SMALLS
What? Can you see anything? What is it?
STUDENT 1
This looks like it says WINFIELD and I swear that darker area on his neck,,right there. Is the same burn scars but that’s a little fuzzy.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Can you make sure it looks like the scars?
STUDENT 1
I can’t enhance this anymore, it will go to shit on me.
DUNCAN SMALLS
That’s not what I mean, touch it up so it clearly looks like the same scar. Make it obvious as hell!
STUDENT 1
Sure! I’m game, I can doctor the shit out of shot!
Duncan starts pacing the room thinking, then quickly turns back to the student.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Do you think you can get someone from the state paper,,some one who is hungry to make a name for themself, come interview a witness?
STUDENT 1
A witness? We making up fake witnesses now?
DUNCAN SMALLS
No, I have a real one and with this photo,, the pieces are starting to come together.
He paces around more still talking
DUNCAN SMALLS
And I need you to write a fake story for the University news paper.
STUDENT 1
Hey man, I’m capable of writing a REAL! story.
DUNCAN SMALLS
That’s not what I mean, my point is we aren’t looking to get this actually published. Just to circulate information out through the staff, especially the picture with the name and scar in it.
STUDENT 1
So whats the story? Winfield was in the Army once? That’s not sexy news. And where is this witness that you are bogarting from me?
DUNCAN SMALLS
The story is something like University staff was involved in a secret prison camp and systematically suppressed a PhD’s candidates research to continue support of a coverup. Something like that, use my name and what has happened to me.
STUDENT 1
Is that what happened to your lip and your nasty looking eye?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, it is (reaches up to touch his lip) I almost forgot
STUDENT 1
Stand over there by the wall, I need to get pictures of this shit, for the story.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Make the story sound like there is a mountain of more evidence coming, that this is just scratching the surface.
STUDENT 1
Nice! Where is the rest of it?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t have anymore, this is it.
STUDENT 1
Whoa yeah, a bluff, now we’re talking!
DUNCAN SMALLS
Oh and I need to give you the name and location of the witness (grabs some paper and a pen) we need someone from the paper, someone who can get the news media and others to listen.
STUDENT 1
Got it!
DUNCAN SMALLS
We don’t have much time, I need someone to go see him to day and you get copies of your story out around campus. People need to see this picture and think there more. Once you do that, you should leave campus for a few days, lay low somewhere.
STUDENT 1
Oh wow, this is like real breaking spy news shit!
DUNCAN SMALLS
If Winfield thinks you know more, it could get ugly. Hey, make copies of the pictures and tell your dad you need to visit him at work and talk. Call in sick to class. Here is the name and room number oh and my girlfriends name Dr. Nakamura for the reporter.
STUDENT 1
And what are you gonna do?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m not sure yet, I’m working on it. (pulling out his phone and texting)
INT.THE LIBRARY BAR – SAME TIME
LANCE LARRSON
What happened to your eye? Oh Jesus and that fat ass lip?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Thanks for meeting me, I’ll fill you in
We hear Duncan catching up Lance on the events and the plan with the student and Mr.Jenkins to this point.
LANCE LARRSON
You know if this is true, old Winnie is just gonna come after you harder with the boys.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I know, that’s why I need some ideas, I need something that will shine a spotlight so bright he doesn’t dare make a move.
LANCE LARRSON
And you said, that you saw huge complex of building rubble that matches the photo’s?
DUNCAN SMALLS
What if people think the photo’s are faked or from some other place?
LANCE LARRSON
I have an idea (takes a beat and a deep breath) its crazier than your boat shit but if we can pull it off, it will be a spotlight for sure. Hang on, I need to make a call.
Lance pulls out his cell and walks toward the door, motioning to Duncan to stay put and not follow.
EXT.CONSTRUCTION SITE – NIGHT
Its dark and by flashlight we can see Duncan and Lance is fumbling with keys to unlock a padlock on a large chainlink gate.
LANCE LARRSON
So, you remember those summers I worked road construction?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Summers? You didn’t last 4 weeks!
LANCE LARRSON
That’s not the point, I’m still buddies with some of the guys. Well and one (we hear the lock release) is now the owner, since his retired last year.
DUNCAN SMALLS
And so he just gives you the keys? And says here play around at night?
LANCE LARRSON
You know my dad was the county prosecutor for one term?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, so what?
LANCE LARRSON
Well, my construction buddy got in a little jam once. Something about punching a deputy. Well my dad helped keep it out of court and some money changed hands. The deputy got a new sports car and my buddy walked.
DUNCAN SMALLS
So he owes you? And is dad still pissed you didn’t go to law school?
LANCE LARRSON
Yep and Yep, he fuckin owes me. Anyway, this highway project is behind schedule and over budget, so to cut cost, they cut night security!
DUNCAN SMALLS
I still don’t get how this helps my situation?
LANCE LARRSON
You see that big ass backhoe?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, so?
LANCE LARRSON
Guess who knows how to use one? (points at himself) We just have to have it back and this place locked up before 5 am.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Still don’t get it
LANCE LARRSON
Oh, you will! Hop on bitch!
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MORNING
NEWSCASTER
Good morning viewers, if you are headed north we have some bad news. The freeway has been flooded by a break in the lake conway levee. That’s right, the lake is emptying into the surrounding forest and low lying sections of I-40. Our helicopters are on the way to the scene, we will bring you video soon.
EXT.LAKE – MORNING
We see helicopters flying over a flooded freeway then moving toward a almost empty lake bed.
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MOMENTS LATER
NEWSCASTER
And we are back with that exclusive footage of the levee failure we promised you! I’m sorry what?(news caster, holds her earpiece tighter in her ear) Sorry viewers, my helicopter crew says they see what looks to be foundations and maybe rubble of a large complex of building in the lake bed. (holds the other ear piece) My researcher on the news floor, says they can find no record of previous buildings before the damn was built.
We see the video footage from a low flight and then hovering directly over what was a huge complex of buildings.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – SAME TIME
We see professors and teachers getting coffee, on the wall is a flat screen tv showing the newscast. We also see the back of Professor Winfield watching. Behind him we see the door opening and Duncan & Lance quietly walking in.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – MORNING
We see the chancellor watching the morning news in his office, we see him notice a piece of paper in the floor. As he picks it up, we can see that its the fake University paper story detailing the Universities actions to suppress Duncan’s research. He looks back up to the breaking news story.
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MOMENTS LATER
NEWSCASTER
Wait, wait, we have more! I’m told we have a newspaper reporter on the phone, who says recently he finished an interview with an eyewitness, this witness tells us this was a secret military prison camp. Oh and we have a picture coming in now!
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – SAME TIME
From behind we are still seeing professor Winfields back watching the screen as we see the old picture of him with his name clearly displayed, fills the screen. He drops his coffee cup on the floor and it breaks. The others in the room turn to look at him. He turns to leave the room and see’s Duncan and Lance across the room with a table in between.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Got something you would like to tell us?
Lance is standing behind Duncan with both middle fingers up in the air, we can see he’s bursting at the seams. Winfield is fuming but in a room full of people staring at him, he dare not try anything.
LANCE LARRSON
Hey! Fuck You!
Winfield storms out the opposite toward his office. Lance’s cell rings and steps out into the hallway, Duncan walks behind him and we can hear Lance talking.
LANCE LARRSON
Hey buddy. Yep we are even, we’re good. Ummm hmmm, ha ha. So your insurance guy says the flooding is an act of god and you have a claim..thats great! And I’ll bet the state will be taking bids on rebuilding a certain levee. Funny how it all works out my friend!
INT.NEWS STUDIO – NIGHT
NEWSCASTER
We have word coming in from police that a Professor George Winfield is dead of what looks to be a self inflicted gun shot wound, he was found in his University office earlier today. We have reached out to the University and are awaiting comment.
INT.UNIVERSITY GROUNDS – WEEKS LATER DAY
We see rows of chairs set up in front of a temporary stage, news crews are present. We see the Chancellor approaching the podium, Duncan and Dr. Nakamura are seated on the stage behind him. Lance is on the front row with the audience.
CHANCELLOR
It is crucial that as an institution of higher learning, that we adapt as the known sphere of information changes. That we heed the call to shine light on injustice, where ever or when ever it maybe found. And with that I am proud to announce formation of our new Center for Asian American studies and Japanese Relocation Archives. I also would like to introduce the Director of the Archives Duncan Smalls.
He turns and motions to Duncan.
INT.THERAPIST OFFICE – DAYS LATER
THERAPIST
Good to see you again, I understand that congratulations are in order.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Thank you
THERAPIST
So, you have had some significant and very rapid changes in your life lately. How are you processing all of this?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Much of it was sudden, it all turned out better for me. So I can’t complain.
He is looking off with a puzzled look on his face.
THERAPIST
And, looks like there is something there.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I,,I still don’t understand where it all came from?
THERAPIST
I’m not sure what you mean by “it all”
DUNCAN SMALLS
It’s a really odd version of my “dreams came true” because they were all nightmares. How did I have dreams about something, I didn’t know existed and yet it was real?
THERAPIST
I see. It is possible that at some point, you did read or come across some information about it, and your subconscious mind neatly packed it away. Later, some event or stress triggered it’s release as dreams.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Again, that’s more theory. This is the only part that bugs me, is not knowing “how” or “why me?”. Nor does it explain me being the only one the see the little girl!
THERAPIST
If you are open to it, we could try hypnosis and access your subconscious mind directly and ask it. How does that sound?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m willing to try
We hear the therapist start to walk through some hypnotic induction, we get a sense of some time lapse with muffled volume. Then we are back to real time.
THERAPIST
Now, lets go back to the first time you were aware of the prison camp. Are you back to that moment?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yes, I’m here, I can see it
THERAPIST
Tell me about it Duncan
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m not Duncan
THERAPIST
What is your name?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Aiko
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 4 Climax
What I learned doing this assignment is just how much fun it can be getting to this point, taking the ride with the characters. Plus the satisfaction of nearing completion on this time table.
INT.THE LIBRARY BAR – SAME TIME
LANCE LARRSON
What happened to your eye? Oh Jesus and that fat ass lip?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Thanks for meeting me, I’ll fill you in
We hear Duncan catching up Lance on the events and the plan with the student and Mr.Jenkins to this point.
LANCE LARRSON
You know if this is true, old Winnie is just gonna come after you harder with the boys.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I know, that’s why I need some ideas, I need something that will shine a spotlight so bright he doesn’t dare make a move.
LANCE LARRSON
And you said that you saw huge complex of building rubble in the lake, that matches the photo’s?
DUNCAN SMALLS
What if people think the photo’s are faked or from some other place?
LANCE LARRSON
I have an idea (takes a beat and a deep breath) its crazier than your boat shit but if we can pull it off, it will be a spotlight for sure. Hang on, I need to make a call.
Lance pulls out his cell and walks toward the door, motioning to Duncan to stay put and not follow.
EXT.CONSTRUCTION SITE – NIGHT
Its dark and by flashlight we can see Duncan and Lance is fumbling with keys to unlock a padlock on a large chainlink gate.
LANCE LARRSON
So, you remember those summers I worked road construction?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Summers? You didn’t last 4 weeks!
LANCE LARRSON
That’s not the point, I’m still buddies with some of the guys. Well and one (we hear the lock release) is now the owner, since his retired last year.
DUNCAN SMALLS
And so he just gives you the keys? And says here play around at night?
LANCE LARRSON
You know my dad was the county prosecutor for one term?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, so what?
LANCE LARRSON
Well, my construction buddy got in a little jam once. Something about punching a deputy. Well my dad helped keep it out of court and some money changed hands. The deputy got a new sports car and my buddy walked.
DUNCAN SMALLS
So he owes you? And is dad still pissed you didn’t go to law school?
LANCE LARRSON
Yep and Yep, he fuckin owes me. Anyway, this highway project is behind schedule and over budget, so to cut cost, they cut night security!
DUNCAN SMALLS
I still don’t get how this helps my situation?
LANCE LARRSON
You see that big ass backhoe?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, so?
LANCE LARRSON
Guess who knows how to use one? (points at himself) We just have to have it back and this place locked up before 5 am.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Still don’t get it
LANCE LARRSON
Oh, you will! Hop on bitch!
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MORNING
NEWSCASTER
Good morning viewers, if you are headed north we have some bad news. The freeway has been flooded by a break in the lake conway levee. That’s right, the lake is emptying into the surrounding forest and low lying sections of I-40. Our helicopters are on the way to the scene, we will bring you video soon.
EXT.LAKE – MORNING
We see helicopters flying over a flooded freeway then moving toward a almost empty lake bed.
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MOMENTS LATER
NEWSCASTER
And we are back with that exclusive footage of the levee failure we promised you! I’m sorry what?(news caster, holds her earpiece tighter in her ear) Sorry viewers, my helicopter crew says they see what looks to be foundations and maybe rubble of a large complex of building in the lake bed. (holds the other ear piece) My researcher on the news floor, says they can find no record of previous buildings before the damn was built.
We see the video footage from a low flight and then hovering directly over what was a huge complex of buildings.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – SAME TIME
We see professors and teachers getting coffee, on the wall is a flat screen tv showing the newscast. We also see the back of Professor Winfield watching. Behind him we see the door opening and Duncan & Lance quietly walking in.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – MORNING
We see the chancellor watching the morning news in his office, we see him notice a piece of paper in the floor. As he picks it up, we can see that its the fake University paper story detailing the Universities actions to suppress Duncan’s research. He looks back up to the breaking news story.
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MOMENTS LATER
NEWSCASTER
Wait, wait, we have more! I’m told we have a newspaper reporter on the phone, who says recently he finished an interview with an eyewitness, this witness tells us this was a secret military prison camp. Oh and we have a picture coming in now!
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – SAME TIME
From behind we are still seeing professor Winfields back watching the screen as we see the old picture of him with his name clearly displayed, fills the screen. He drops his coffee cup on the floor and it breaks. The others in the room turn to look at him. He turns to leave the room and see’s Duncan and Lance across the room with a table in between.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Got something you would like to tell us?
Lance is standing behind Duncan with both middle fingers up in the air, we can see he’s bursting at the seams. Winfield is fuming but in a room full of people staring at him, he dare not to try anything.
LANCE LARRSON
Hey! Fuck You!
Winfield storms out the opposite toward his office. Lance’s cell rings and steps out into the hallway, Duncan walks behind him and we can hear Lance talking.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 4 First Scenes
What I learned from doing this assignment is that I had to weave in more setup after Act 3 TP, to push my main character into a combined reaction and dilemma.
ACT 4
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM – SAME TIME
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Morning Mr. Jenkins, you have couple of bags of fluid in you. You should be feeling a little better.
MR. JENKINS
I am, thank you much better, sorry to be trouble again
HITOMI NAKAMURA
No trouble at all, you sound better and by the way, it’s ok this is kinda my job. So, can I ask you a question?
MR. JENKINS
Sure, I owe you that at least I imagine.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
When you came in last night you were mostly mumbling but at one point you called me Aiko?
Mr.Jenkins physically reacts to the name, pulls back slightly and appears uncomfortable.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Is Aiko someone we can call for you? A friend, a family memb.
MR. JENKINS
(the normally respectful Jenkins, interrupts her) No, you can’t call her (looks away from the Dr. and is holding back tears)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
(confused) I don’t mean to upset you but you called me Aiko and talked about candy and said you were sorry. If its a loved one you lost, we have really good therapists I can get.
MR. JENKINS
I shouldn’t have said that name and I am sorry (tearing up a little more)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
No need to apologize for calling me the wrong name, when you were incoherent.
MR. JENKINS
No, I’m sorry, I need to apologize to you and your people
HITOMI NAKAMURA
My people? Sir, I’m from Seattle, I doubt you even know my family
MR. JENKINS
Not your family, your people, Japanese people. (he looks around the room)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I’m really confused sir
MR. JENKINS
The box, I need the box
Hitomi gets up out of curiosity picks up the tattered old file box and sets it on the bed. He begins to rifle through papers and pulls out old pictures.
MR. JENKINS
I live down near the lake, well used to be in the forest before there was a lake. I used to hunt and when I couldn’t find game, I’d carry my old brownie and take pictures. Develop them myself at home, I did recon photography in the war.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
You don’t need to apologize for being in the War.
MR. JENKINS
No, let me finish. After I was discharged and sent home, I was hunting and found something in the woods. A camp, military prison camp. What I found was Japanese families being held there, this was after the war was over.
He hands her old photos taken from the brush but faintly showing Japanese families behind a large fence with razor wire and complex of buildings inside the fence line.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I see (slowly flipping through photos)
MR. JENKINS
I became obsessed with it, returning, observing never seeing any prisoners being discharged to go home. I noticed one area near the fence line where the children would play in the dirt. So at night, I timed the guard patrol, snuck to the fence line and threw wrapped hard candy into the dirt area.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
That was thoughtful
MR. JENKINS
No, it was cowardly. I was willing to keep returning with candy and let that make me feel better (he starts to cry again and looks down at his hands) but not willing to take action.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Did you say this was near the lake?
MR. JENKINS
Its dead in the middle of the lake, the deepest section. That shallow lake is a coverup!
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Do you mind if I borrow these? (holding up the pictures) It may not be too late for you to help.
MR. JENKINS
Keep them if it helps at all
INT.COFFEE SHOP – MID MORNING
Tattered and defeated, Duncan walks into the coffee shop alone, leaving a trail of dried mud behind him with the notices still crumpled in hand. He continues to read the notice and the waitress is taking longer than normal. She finally comes with two coffee cups only one has coffee in it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I only need one
WAITRESS
You are gonna need two and I should bring you a broom also (pointing at the trail he left)
DUNCAN SMALLS
Sorry, I didn’t realize
WAITRESS
Oh well, I guess its ok
Hitomi comes flying through the front door of the coffee shop, the waitress sees her then turns and pours the other cup
WAITRESS
I told you so..(then walks away)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I don’t know how but you were right (spreading the photographs out on the table) You look like hell, what happened?
DUNCAN SMALLS
(still in shock to see her, he slowly puts down the notice in his hand and looks at the photo’s)
Where did you get these?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
A patient, who is also a witness. You look like you lost a fight?
DUNCAN SMALLS
That I did, now I think I maybe winning this war. (he singles out one photo that shows a solider clearly in uniform) Who is this? I can almost read his name.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I don’t know, I didn’t look that closely at them. I was just in shock that it all lined up with your dreams.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Wait, how did the waitress know you were coming?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I treated her son last year for a football injury, we exchanged numbers then. I called and ask if she had seen you this morning.
Duncan takes a sip of coffee, while lost in thought and his swollen lip causes him to dribble.
DUNCAN SMALLS
How long will your patient be in the hospital?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I don’t know that I have reason to keep him past today.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Can you make one up? Buy some time and can he have visitors, can you get him to talk about it to anyone else?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I could probably keep him for observation for another day or two much more than that. I think at this point he is willing to talk, at least as a favor for me, why?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Its a stretch but I have an idea.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I thought seeing these would give you, I don’t know something like closure, maybe write about it and get your job back and be done with the rest of the nonsense. Get your old life back.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(Duncan takes a beat, thinking deeply) This is so much bigger than my job or any thesis. I had time to think this morning. I have spent most of my life trying to somehow make my dead parents proud, spending the currency of my future to pay off a debt I thought I owed to my past. I don’t know if its the Universe, or destiny but I now have been given an opportunity, a purpose if you will, a chance to make a difference. Something bigger than myself.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Wow, I have been waiting to meet this guy in front of me. So no, more
DUNCAN SMALLS
So, is your patient reliable?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
He is an elderly man with dementia, not exactly witness stand material if that’s what you mean.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Can you keep him for another 24 to 48 hours and if I send someone to talk to him, keep him in his right mind.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I can keep him physically there and hydrated but no promises on being lucid.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Ok, do that, hold him, keep him alert and I’ll get someone over there to get his story
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Who are you sending?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know yet but I gotta go see some students.
He gathers up the photos and puts the one of the solider in his shirt pocket. Runs out of the coffee shop.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Finish Act 3
What I learned doing this assignment are more little gems revealed by characters, that cause me to add scenes or dialog to earlier Acts.
ACT 3
INT.THE LIBRARY BAR – AFTERNOON
Duncan asks Lance to join him at the bar, says to meet him in a booth, preferably in the back. Passing other booths some of his students speak to him.
STUDENT 1
Hey, sorry man
DUNCAN SMALLS
sorry for what?
STUDENT 2
You missed morning class and, well that asshat Winfield came in and said you were on the outs
STUDENT 1
And he said it like it was a good thing, I hate that asshole, anything we can do to help? Hey,I am on the school newspaper (the other student rolls his eyes) what?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Thanks, but no thanks..I have to work it out
Duncan begins to walk away with a polite smile toward the back booth that is in his sites, the student turns over his shoulder to him and says
STUDENT 1
Ya know, if you change you mind, I’m doing an internship at the state paper too.
STUDENT 2
You mean where your daddy is the editor?
STUDENT 1
Shut up, ya dick!
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’ll keep that in mind (shaking his head no slowly, and sits down at the booth where Lance is waiting)
LANCE LARRSON
So, buddy, whats up..you looking a little green around the gills
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hitomi’s in the hospital and I just got fired, well suspended
LANCE LARRSON
I thought she’s in the hospital everyday cause she works there, and how did you get fired?
DUNCAN SMALLS
She’s in the hospital, not at the hospital and I apparently jumped the gun on my thesis
LANCE LARRSON
Lance leans back and makes a time out sign with his hands
Wait, what, time out…Back up this train. Your girl is a patient and not treating them and you somehow got fired because of your thesis?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I got the Regent to approve my theme and that pissed off the Chancellor who fired me, for going over his head. Hitomi got run off the road, Oh and someone broke into my car.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I think someone is out to get me
Lance puts his face in hands then rubs them back and forth across his head a few times, he pulls out a cigarette and lights it
DUNCAN SMALLS
Mind if I have one (reaching out, Lance hands him one and lights it)
LANCE LARRSON
Yeah, buddy..I think we need the old glass bong for this one. (takes a long deep drag) so first off, is your girl ok?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, just a broken arm and banged up but she’s safe in the hospital
LANCE LARRSON
Ok, check one. Anything taken out of your car?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, file copies for my research
LANCE LARRSON
Well, you can make new copies…no biggee (nodding his head as if he’s working it all out)
DUNCAN SMALLS
Nope, the originals were stolen from the state archives and someone tossed my apartment
LANCE LARRSON
Now that is interesting, quite curious indeed…so some dip shit misplaced them, coincidence man, at the same time your girl gets in a fender bender..oh and some student broke into your place to steal pizza money…for sure a bad day but by no means CIA shit.
Duncan is looking out the window and checking around the room, obviously spinning in his head
LANCE LARRSON
Hey man, I appreciate you reaching out but what is it you want me to do. I’d think you would want to be with your girl right now..
DUNCAN SMALLS
I want you to help me steal a boat, I need to know whats in that lake.
LANCE LARRSON
Doo, Whaaat? Friends are supposed to help you hide the bodies, not search for them. I’m not a thief.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I know you didn’t buy all that shit in our dorm room, I need your help now.
LANCE LARRSON
Hey, you used that stereo just as much as I did. So I don’t wanna hear any shit out of you…Look, we can’t steal a boat and..and even if we did, say we find an old boot or a helmet? That proves nothing, its just old trash.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I know I’m onto something, I can feel it, someone is out to stop me..Now I have to know
LANCE LARRSON
Since when are you going by feelings or beliefs? Look, this is def some overthinking and not overdrinking, conspiracy theory shit…none for me buddy, I’m out!
EXT.SPORTING GOODS STORE – EARLY EVENING
Duncan drives to a local large sporting goods store and is walking outside in the area where they display the different types of fishing boats, when a salesman walks up.
SALESMEN
You look like crappie to me
DUNCAN SMALLS
Excuse me? I look like what
SALESMEN
Never mind, bad fishing joke, lets start over, How can I help?
DUNCAN SMALLS
(takes a beat in thought) bottom fishing
SALESMEN
Local lake, rivers, do you want to travel with it?
DUNCAN SMALLS
How do I know that I’m in the right spot? I don’t have a lot of extra time?
SALESMEN
Ahh, lets not mess around kinda guy, you want a fish finder. Lets step inside and I’ll show you.
They walk together inside as the salesmen continues to talk, they head toward a giant fish tank with all types of fish.
SALESMEN
These babies will show you schools of fish, logs and other obstructions that attract fish and could get you hung up.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hmm, how do I know the difference between fish and obstructions
SALESMEN
With the latest live sonar, you will get live video in incredible detail just like a shipwreck hunter on tv.
DUNCAN SMALLS
How much is the boat I was looking at and how much is this live sonar?
SALESMEN
That bass hunter boat is $22,000
DUNCAN SMALLS
Whoa!…and the sonar?
SALESMEN
The live sonar is $1,499 and I’ll throw in a battery to run it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Does it have a carry case, or maybe fit in a backpack?
SALESMEN
Turns his head struggling to understand the thought pattern but is not about to pass up a sale
Ya know these are made to be permanently mounted to a boat like that bass hunter. Nevermind, if you buy the live sonar, I’ll throw in a battery and we’ll go over to camping gear and find a backpack that works for you. How’s that?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Deal!
INT.DUNCAN APT – NIGHT
Duncan struggles to stay awake to avoid another nightmare, finally dozes off and has the most detail gruesome dream of all. Paces the room after waking searching for a solution.
EXT.LAKE DOCKS – NIGHT
Sneaking between lake front houses, looking for a boat and has some close calls at getting caught.
DUNCAN SMALLS
This looks like a good one, only one rope holding it.
LANCE LARRSON
I don’t know how I let you talk me into this shit
DUNCAN SMALLS
You didn’t want to be left out of any the glory
LANCE LARRSON
I’m standing in mud that smells like dead fish, I’m cold and sneaking around in the dark..there is no glory to be found here. And what is sticking out of your backpack there, super solider?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Fish finder and a battery to run it, stop yapping and help me push this out of the dock
LANCE LARRSON
Climbs in the boat and starts to quietly paddle, talking to Duncans back
So uh, what fish are we catching with no poles or net?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Just looking for any patterns on the bottom that might look man made.
LANCE LARRSON
So you know how to figure out the difference between natural and man made with that finder?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I got a 15 min lesson in the big tank at the sporting goods store…
I also know from my archaeology classes, that there are no right angles in nature. Straight lines and right angles are man made. Now, shut up and let me think,,,school of fish, stump,,big ass log, I think have, I have some straight lines
LANCE LARRSON
Shit! Boat headed this way with an engine…shut that monitor off and help me paddle!
INT.THE LIBRARY BAR – MIDDAY
Both looking tired Duncan and Lance regroup just as the bar is opening
DUNCAN SMALLS
Can you believe it? One little trip out and we found something, something man made!
LANCE LARRSON
I believe we almost got our asses caught, so far I’m still teaching here and well, would prefer to keep it that way.
DUNCAN SMALLS
This could be huge, we,,,we could change history with this!
LANCE LARRSON
I don’t know about changing history or even altering the future but I got a strong feeling it could sure fuckup my current situation. So how’s your girl doing?
DUNCAN SMALLS
She is still at the hospital, I’m sure she is fine with her people.
LANCE LARRSON
Soooo, you haven’t checked on her this morning? You need to drop this lake shit and go check on the last good thing you have going for you.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I believe we are really close, we have to keep pressing!
LANCE LARRSON
Again with this belief shit? Who is this talking, you are trashing everything you have worked for over some nightmares cause you ate junk food before you went to bed or something?
DUNCAN SMALLS
(snaps back in a serious tone) So are you with me or not?
LANCE LARRSON
With you? This isn’t some US against them movie. This is your life, wake up? And no, I can’t be doing this, go back to searching archives and reading books.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(looking off out the window, nodding his head) All right, I get it. You are all about some fun, but when shit gets real, when it gets hard you bail out. (looks dead at him) I don’t fucking need you, at all.
Gets up and storms out of the bar
LANCE LARRSON
Stays seated letting him walk out while calling
Hey, hey..(now to himself) that guys is gonna end up in jail or dead anyway.
EXT.LAKE DOCKS – NIGHT
Frustrated and alone Duncan steals the same boat again, struggles to paddle it alone
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m better off alone anyway, dip shit Lance doesn’t understand. I’ll set the obstruction alarm on the sonar and just paddle around, wait for it to go off.
Trying to paddle evenly on each side alone, he occasionally bangs the side of boat on the quiet lake, it echoes off the houses. Alone he is making less forward progress.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Ugggh, what am I doing out here. This is ridiculous
He faintly hears the lapping of water against a hull, as if a large vessel is crossing the shallow lake. From out of the rolling fog in the distance he sees a fishing trawler. He can see men, translucent men, lowering nets over the sides as the large ship with no engine noise moves toward him.
DUNCAN SMALLS
What in the holy hell? (rubs his eyes) Now I’m really loosing it.
The ship glides right in front of him with no wake, trees and stumps pass through the center of its hull. He can see up above him 8 to 10 feet in the air the name “Onryo” on the side of its hull. Clearly the men are all japanese and don’t seem to be aware of his presence. The fog has followed the ship and now engulfs Duncan and his boat. As the end of the boat passes, he sees one older man who is not working but observing the others, turns and looks directly at Duncan expressionless and yet knowing, not breaking eye contact.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Who are you? (he begins to paddle, trying to follow the gliding ship)
Paddling hastily with no concern for noise, he begins to catch the ship as it becomes more translucent and fades.
DUNCAN SMALLS
No, wait, I don’t understand
Beep Beep Beep, the fish finder obstruction alarm goes off and the monitor comes alive with a detailed sonar picture from below, he can’t believe his eyes.
INT.DUNCAN APT – 1 AM
Comes home wet smelling like fishy water, after the second night of searching the lake in a stolen boat
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Where have you been sneaking out too,, night after night, as if I didn’t know,,,,and what is that god awful smell?
DUNCAN SMALLS
The lake and lake water,,,maybe a little fishy mud? You won’t belive what I saw and what is down there!
HITOMI NAKAMURA
The lake? In the dark, in the middle of the night? You don’t even fish,, Oh and I know you got fired, a letter and your last partial check is on the bar, when were you going to tell me that?…You know what, I don’t want to know what you are doing.
She starts packing a few things into a large bag she pulls out the hall closet, he still stands dripping wet on the entry rug.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Someone ran me off the road, when I woke up you were not there. You got fired and now you are doing god knows what in the middle of the night. You obviously have some shit to figure out and you will be doing without me.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(interrupts) I’m really onto something!
HITOMI NAKAMURA
(she interrupts him) she has now pushed past him and is outside his apartment looking back
Look, (looks at her watch) i have to be on shift in a few hours, I don’t have time for this.
I’m going to my rental car and I’m sleeping at my place from now on. call me, if and when you figure it all out.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(mumble to himself) You don’t understand, this is real.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I heard that, I’m clear that you don’t think I understand. (climbs in her car and slams the door)
EXT.LAKE DOCKS – 3 AM
Alone in the world with no reason to stay home he returns the lake with paper and pen in his backpack to map out the foundations of buildings he found on the bottom.
He quietly climbs into the same boat and begins to unpack his backpack
DUNCAN SMALLS
(to himself) fish finder, battery, notepad, pe..
when there is a hand on his shoulder.
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
You are gonna need to come with us sir.
DUNCAN SMALLS
But I was just,
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
Don’t bother, we know this isn’t your house or your boat. Please don’t make this difficult for yourself.
They cuff him by flashlight and put him in the back of an unmarked car.
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM – 5 AM
NURSE 1
Hey Doc, your boyfriend is here
HITOMI NAKAMURA
You have got to be kidding me, get security
NURSE 1
Security? Security for Mr. Jenkins?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Oh shit, I’m sorry I thought..well never mind. What exam is he in?
NURSE 1
He’s not in yet but looks like 7 is up next
The nurse begins to walk away then remembers something and quickly turns around.
EMT, says Mr. Jenkins is bringing you a gift!
HITOMI NAKAMURA
A gift?…that’s a little odd and all I got him was an IV. Well, I never was good at gift giving anyway.
NURSE 1
Turns and motions toward the other end of the hall
There is your date now! Will you two be having the usual? Saline IV, warm blankets and maybe a bed pan?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Throw in a cup of that burnt coffee and it’s a date!
Both have a laugh
EXT.DIRT ROAD – BEFORE DAWN
Police have Duncan cuffed in the backseat, pull out from the lake onto the two lane highway and then turn off the highway down a dirt road.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I always put the boat back, its not technically stealing.
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
No one gives a damn about a boat, do you really think this is about the boat?
DUNCAN SMALLS
This isn’t the way to town, or the police station
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
Great guess genius (he says removing his uniform, he looks at the cop driving) He really doesn’t know.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m guessing you two aren’t the police?
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
Another great guess, you catch on fast but not fast enough, you came along without a fight. (he looks at the driver and they laugh)
They reach the end of the dirt road and pull over, the driver gets out and removes his police costume and they drag Duncan from the car.
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
We are going to have this little chat, one time and one time only. (he punches duncan who is on his knees in the dirt handcuffed) No more questions about the lake, or any camp nonsense
FAKE POLICE THUG 2
(kicks Duncan in the stomach) We really need to you to get, that this is serious, some people don’t like your questions.
They continue to beat him bloody, then remove his handcuffs and pull away, leaving him lying in the dirt with the rising sun
Duncan hears the car stop down the road, looking through a bloody swollen eye, hoping they are not coming back he notices another car that was watching by the dashboard light it looks to be professor Winfield, he then pulls away.
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM
EMT 1
Morning Dr., He’s slightly dehydrated not lucid and been mumbling something about bringing the hard candy. He was clinging to this old box of stuff. When we tried to leave without the box he lost it, which made us nervous about his BP so we just brought it to keep him calm. No weapons or drugs in it, just pictures and harmless old man stuff.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Thank you (turns to nurse) see if we can get an IV started and check his vitals
Hitomi standing beside Mr. Jenkins bed turns to walk out and he with shocking speed grabs her sleeve
MR. JENKINS
I brought more hard candy like I promised (with a little smile)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
That’s very nice of you, we will get you feeling better soon
He grips her sleeve tighter and begins to cry speaking through his tears
MR. JENKINS
I’m sorry, I couldn’t do more, please tell the others I’m sorry (sobbing uncontrollably)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Sir I need you to be calm, please take a deep breath and try to get some rest while we get you hydrated.
MR. JENKINS
(still sobbing) I’m sorry Aiko, I’m so sorry
HITOMI NAKAMURA
(looks at the nurse) make a note for social services on the name Aiko, might be a family member they could contact, Oh,, and tell them about the box. (she pats his arm and pulls away, walking out)
EXT.UNIVERSITY – MORNING
We see Duncan dirty, bloody and tired walking near the end of the dirt road, now reaching the paved road he is hitchhiking.
We see a local give him a ride to the university in the back of his truck.
He reaches his apartment to find a notice on the door, one says he has been removed from the university. The second says student housing is only for faculty and students only and he has 10 days to move out.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 3 Turning Point
What I learned from doing this assignment is how to find the ways in which the emotional dominoes can be lined up.
EXT.LAKE DOCKS – 3 AM
Alone in the world with no reason to stay home he returns the lake with paper and pen in his backpack to map out the foundations of buildings he found on the bottom.
He quietly climbs into the same boat and begins to unpack his backpack
DUNCAN SMALLS
(to himself) fish finder, battery, notepad, pe..
when there is a hand on his shoulder.
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
You are gonna need to come with us sir.
DUNCAN SMALLS
But I was just,
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
Don’t bother, we know this isn’t your house or your boat. Please don’t make this difficult for yourself.
They cuff him by flashlight and put him in the back of an unmarked car.
EXT.DIRT ROAD – BEFORE DAWN
Police have Duncan cuffed in the backseat, pull out from the lake onto the two lane highway and then turn off the highway down a dirt road.
DUNCAN SMALLS
This isn’t the way to town, or the police station
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
Great guess genius (he says removing his uniform)
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m guessing you two aren’t the police?
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
Another great guess, you catch on fast but not fast enough, you came along without a fight. (he looks at the driver and they laugh)
They reach the end of the dirt road and pull over, the driver gets out and removes his police costume and they drag Duncan from the car.
FAKE POLICE THUG 1
We are going to have this little chat, one time and one time only. (he punches duncan who is on his knees in the dirt handcuffed) No more questions about the lake, or any camp nonsense
FAKE POLICE THUG 2
(kicks Duncan in the stomach) We really need to you to get, that this is serious, some things are best staying buried.
They continue to beat him bloody, then remove his handcuffs and pull away, leaving him lying in the dirt with the rising sun
Duncan hears the car stop down the road, looking througha bloody swollen eye, hoping they are not coming back he notices another car that was watching by the dashboard light it looks to be professor Winfield, he then pulls away.
EXT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
We see Duncan dirty, bloody and tired walking near the end of the dirt road, now reaching the paved road he is hitchhiking.
We see a local give him a ride to the university in the back of his truck.
He reaches his apartment to find a notice on the door, one says he has been removed from the university. The second says student housing is only for faculty and students in good standing and he has 10 days to move out.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 3 Middle Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is how to weave little pieces of the characters arc while still being tied to the old familiar anchor.
EXT.LAKE DOCKS – NIGHT
Sneaking between lake front houses, looking for a boat and has some close calls at getting caught.
DUNCAN SMALLS
This looks like a good one, only one rope holding it, no locks.
LANCE LARRSON
I don’t know how, I let you talk me into this shit
DUNCAN SMALLS
You didn’t want to be left out of any of the glory
LANCE LARRSON
I’m standing in mud that smells like dead fish, I’m cold and sneaking around in the dark..there is no glory to be found here. And what is sticking out of your backpack there, super solider?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Fish finder and a battery to run it, stop yapping and help me push this out of the dock
LANCE LARRSON
Climbs in the boat and starts to quietly paddle, talking to Duncans back
So uh, what fish are we catching with no poles or net?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Just looking for any patterns on the bottom that might look man made.
LANCE LARRSON
So you know how to figure out the difference between natural and man made with that finder?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I got a 15 min lesson in the big tank at the sporting goods store…Shut up and let me think,,,school of fish, stump,,big ass log, I think have, I have some straight lines
LANCE LARRSON
Shit! Boat headed this way with an engine…shut that monitor off and help me paddle!
INT.DUNCAN APT – 1 AM
Comes home wet smelling like fishy water, after the third night of searching the lake in a stolen boat
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Where have you been sneaking out too, night after night, as if I didn’t know,,,,and what is that god awful smell?
DUNCAN SMALLS
The lake and lake water,,,maybe a little fishy mud?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
The lake? In the dark, in the middle of the night? You don’t even fish,, Oh and I know you got fired, a letter and your last partial check is on the bar, when were you going to tell me that?…You know what, I don’t want to know what you are doing.
She starts packing a few things into a large bag she pulls out the hall closet, he still stands dripping wet on the entry rug.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Someone ran me off the road, when I woke up you were not there. You got fired and now you are doing god knows what in the middle of the night. You obviously have some shit to figure out and you will be doing it on your own.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(interrupts) I’m really onto something!
HITOMI NAKAMURA
(she interrupts him) she has now pushed past him and is outside his apartment looking back
Look, I’m going to my rental car and I’m sleeping at my place from now on, call me if and when you figure it all out.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 3 reaction to Midpoint
What I learned doing this assignment is how to make the protagonist dig deeper in his/her well of reaction and still be wrong.
ACT 3
INT.THE LIBRARY BAR – AFTERNOON
Duncan asks Lance to join him at the bar, grabs a booth in the back won’t sit at the bar.
LANCE LARRSON
So, buddy, whats up..you looking a little green around the gills
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hitomi’s in the hospital and I just got fired
LANCE LARRSON
I thought she’s in the hospital everyday cause she works there and how did you get fired?
DUNCAN SMALLS
She’s in the hospital, not at the hospital and I apparently jumped the gun on my thesis
LANCE LARRSON
Lance leans back and makes a time out sign with his hands
Wait, what, time out…Back up this train. Your girl is a patient and not treating them and you somehow got fired because of your thesis?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I got the Regent to approve my theme and that pissed off the Chancellor who fired me, for going over his head. Hitomi got run off the road, Oh and someone broke into my car.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I think someone is out to get me
Lance puts his face in in hands then rubs them back and forth across his head a few times, he pulls out a cigarette and lights it
DUNCAN SMALLS
Mind if I have one (reaching out, Lance hands him one and lights it)
LANCE LARRSON
Yeah, buddy..I think we need the old glass bong for this one. (takes a long deep drag) so first off is your girl ok?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, just a broken arm and banged up but she’s safe in the hospital
LANCE LARRSON
Ok, check one. Anything taken out of your car?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yeah, file copies for my research
LANCE LARRSON
Well, you can make new copies…no biggee (nodding his head as if he’s working it all out)
DUNCAN SMALLS
Nope, the originals were stolen from the state archives and someone tossed my apartment
LANCE LARRSON
Now that is interesting, quite curious indeed…so some dipshit misplaced them, coincidence man, at the same time your girl gets in a fender bender..oh and some student broke into your place to steal pizza money…definitely a bad day but by no means CIA shit.
Duncan is looking out the window and checking around the room, obviously spinning in his head
LANCE LARRSON
Hey man, I appreciate you reaching out but what is it you want me to do. I’d think you would want to be with your girl right now..
DUNCAN SMALLS
I want you to help me steal a boat, I need to know whats in that lake.
LANCE LARRSON
Doo, Whaaat? Friends are supposed to help you hide the bodies, not search for them. I’m not a thief.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I know you didn’t buy all that shit in our dorm room, I need your help now.
LANCE LARRSON
Hey, you used that stereo just as much as I did. So I don’t wanna hear any shit out of you…Look, we can’t steal a boat and..and even if we did, say we find an old boot or a helmet? That proves nothing, its just old trash.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I know I’m onto something, someone is out to stop me..Now I have to know
LANCE LARRSON
This is def some overthinking and not overdrinking, conspiracy theory shit…none for me
0 -
Charles Ferrell has completed Act 2 Draft 1
What I learned while doing this assignment is keep hashing out new scenes and let the characters take you where they want to go.
ACT 2
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM – SAME TIME
TRIAGE NURSE
Burst’s through the double doors from the ER waiting area into the treatment area
EMT’s called they are in route with multiple units, along with Fire Rescue. They have one burn, two serious lacerations, another with some broken bones. Oh and one Fire Rescue is still trying to cut out of a car, that is pinned under a Semi Trailer…
All piled up in the construction zone, lets hope we don’t end up with more.
ATTENDING PHYSICIAN
Ok, thank you.
Listen up, I know its shift change but for now no one goes home in case we see more..and will someone put on a pot of coffee..it maybe a long night.
Hitomi who had just removed her lab coat, took a deep breath and turned taking it back off of the wall hook.
INT.DUNCAN APT – 2 AM
Hitomi is quietly entering the apartment exhausted, sits on the couch and falls asleep within minutes
INT.DUNCAN APT – 8 AM
Duncan hurriedly as he is walking out the door mentions to Hitomi
DUNCAN SMALLS
I can’t do coffee, I have to go to see a shrink or declare my thesis theme
A half asleep Hitomi gets up and grabs him by the sleeve.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Therapist? I mean (rubbing her eyes) Therapy is always a good thing but this is sudden. I’m confused, what does a therapist have to do with your theme?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I was given umm….its an ultimatum from the chancellor
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Wait.. wait, you spoke with the chancellor and you have an ultimatum? I’m so lost, after spending the night stitching up bleeding children, I’m trying to catch up here.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Somehow, the Chancellor found out about my nightmare or um.. my visions…I’m not sure which or how but he said either declare it as a thesis theory or declare I’m crazy.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Surely, he didn’t say crazy
DUNCAN SMALLS
Well, no not crazy but he did say declare or go see a therapist.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Consider, that both might be an option. Declare to take some pressure off and see a therapist. Honey, in the span of a decade you lost your entire family…a therapist is not an all-together terrible idea. You should talk to someone about it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know how to talk about it, and now I don’t have a choice
HITOMI NAKAMURA
It’s ok, no one knows how…just go talk and declare..do both and you will be ok
INT.THERAPIST OFFICE – MORNING
Opens the therapists office door, peeking in shyly
DUNCAN SMALLS
Morning, I don’t have an appt. I’m Duncan Smalls
THERAPIST
It’s quite all right, I normally do my admin paperwork at this time. I can work you in, come on in.
Duncan comes in and takes the seat that she motions too
THERAPIST
So, how can I help?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know, not sure how this works.
THERAPIST
Fair enough, tell me about the people or situations in your life where you feel ….lets say pressured or stressed.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Well, I’m a phD candidate, that is the definition of stress and I also teach level 1 history courses.
THERAPIST
That is good clarity, is your family supportive in your efforts?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I..I have no family, my parents died in a car accident when I was 14. My grandmother who raised me after that, died when i was a junior in college…that’s really it.
THERAPIST
Ok, so who are you close too, who do you spend time with?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Uhhh, my girlfriend Hitomi..not sure I have anyone else.
THERAPIST
Good to know, anything else that I should know about..maybe anything that doesn’t fit, or feels out of place in your life?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I have seen…well I’ve had trouble sleeping lately.
THERAPIST
Got it, has anyone else seen anything unusual that would make them not sleep well?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Duncan pauses and notices a large brass vase about 4 feet high to the right behind the therapist and in it sees the reflection of the little girl standing beside him.
No, I guess not yet
INT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
Duncan sees Professor Winfield in the Hallway near the History department teachers lounge and corners him
DUNCAN SMALLS
Prof Winfield, can I bother you? I believe I’m ready to declare my theme.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
I’m running behind but can give you two minutes and two minutes only.
DUNCAN SMALLS
My thesis theme will be “Undocumented Japanese internment camps”
Professor Winfield physically moves back slightly in reaction, he is obviously triggered
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
Tha..that’s a ridiculous choice..pure conspiracy theory and the board will reject it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(intrigued and confused by the reaction)
I’m not sure why its ridiculous, the object of a PhD is to uncover the unknown.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
(starting to walk away)
Look, declare whatever you want but that is nonsense
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – DAY
Seated at a library computer Duncan is searching library archives and declassified information about locations of US Japanese internment camps, student library staff walks up.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hi there.
LIBRARY STAFF
Oh, its you again, Great. Did you book this computer time? You can’t just take it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Uh, no I don’t think so
LIBRARY STAFF
I know you didn’t, because someone is waiting. I need you to go over to the reading area or leave.
He moves to the overstuffed chair in the reading area with one book he has and falls asleep. He dreams of the camp again, he sees men in lab coats and it begins to rain metal paperclips. The paperclips quickly pile up and he cannot move, they are about to over take his face he begins to panic. He wakes from the dream with a scream, the book goes flying the whole library is now looking at him, Including the Chancellor who is leading an Alumni tour group. He locks eyes with the Chancellor.
INT.UNIVERSITY CONFERENCE ROOM – NEXT DAY
A board of professors including the Lead Panel Professor is meeting to accept PhD thesis themes for Science Doctorates, Duncan slips into the back of the room.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Calling Candidate William Trilio
Young man well dressed but in clothes that are not his size approaches the seated panel of professors.
PHD CANDIDATE 3
Thank you board members, the theme for my thesis is “Cell Mytosis in high altitude environments”
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Very nice, (he looks at the other members nodding their heads) Approved…Next Candidate (looking at his list) Oh, that was the last one.
Duncan rushes forward and steps forward in front of the panel
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Yes, may I help you…did we skip you?
DUNCAN SMALLS
No, sir…I’m not on the list but I would like to declare my theme
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
I appreciate your enthusiasm but that is not how this works, however you do look familiar
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yes, sir I’m Duncan Smalls, I was here presenting for the History Board last week.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
(has a little chuckle) That is definitely not how this works, this is the Science Board. I do remember you now, are you still working on it?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m ready sir, I’m sorry to interrupt or break the rules, I promised you I would deliver.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
No one is here from the History Department. But since we finished early and being that I am on the State Board of Regents, I’ll listen, go ahead.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Thank you sssir, My theme, my thesis theme that is….is Undocumented
(his voice shaking, he closes his eyes takes a deep breath and sees the paperclips raining again, then abruptly blurts out) Undocumented U.S. Japanese Internment Camps and their relationship to Operation Paperclip.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
That sounds interesting, thank for doing what you promised, even as unorthodoxed as it maybe. I’ll take it upon myself to approve it and assign Professor Winfield to supervise it…Thank you
INT.DUNCAN APT – EARLY EVENING
DUNCAN SMALLS
Lets go to the Library and celebrate
HITOMI NAKAMURA
We have something to celebrate? Ok, I’m game.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I followed your advice and it worked! I’ll tell you more when we get there.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Oh wonderful! Yeah, lets go!
INT.THE LIBRARY BAR – MOMENTS LATER
Duncan walks in the door and motions to the bartender
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’ll take a Dark Draft and (turns to Hitomi)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
A malbec, 6 oz is good
DUNCAN SMALLS
(repeats) 6oz Malbec, thank you
They grab a nearby booth and take a seat
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Sooo, lets have it…I want to hear the good news
DUNCAN SMALLS
So I declared today..yep yep and it was accepted
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Yeah!
DUNCAN SMALLS
(interrupts slightly) Oh and I saw the therapist
The drinks arrive at their table
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I didn’t know you were on the schedule to present today….did Win..
DUNCAN SMALLS
Winfield
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Yeah, Winfield..did he get you added?
DUNCAN SMALLS
No, not exactly..I.I walked into the back of the Science presentation and they worked me in
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Wooooorked you in,,Ok? I guess it worked. How did it go with the therapist? Not that you have to tell me.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Ok, I guess, she asked me about my family I told her and told her about you and well,,,I guess that was it…I don’t know how it should go.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Ok, so when are you going back for the next one?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t think I am, didn’t seem very helpful
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Therapy is not a “once and done” kind of thing. Oh and what did you declare? I forgot to ask
DUNCAN SMALLS
Undocumented U.S. Japanese Internment Camps and their relationship to Operation Paperclip.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
That is a pretty specific mouthful, sticking with the dream theme? Oh and whats the paperclip thingy?
DUNCAN SMALLS
It’s from another dream I had
INT.COFFEE SHOP – NEXT MORNING
Already at their normal table with early morning smiles in the sunshine as it comes into the shop
DUNCAN SMALLS
What a great morning, really feels good
HITOMI NAKAMURA
It’s always good to mark somethings off your list.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yes it sure is (coffee arrives)
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I do wish you would consider seeing the therapist again, if even just for me.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know…not sure what to say, or what I’m supposed to get out of it? How do I know if I’m doing it right?
HITOMI NAKAMURA
I’m pretty sure there is no “doing it wrong” you just go and talk. You could talk about your dreams?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Looks off into space, refusing to make eye contact with her
I can’t,,I don’t…I just don’t think she would understand
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Oh, I see…that again, well I need to get to work.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I have a drive myself to make (they part awkwardly)
INT.PROFFESOR WINFIELDS OFFICE – SAME TIME
At his computer drinking coffee and catching up on administrative work when he reads about his assignment to Duncan’s thesis declaration.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
What in the Holy Hell? What the fuck can he possibly he know?
He pulls his cell from his pockets and dials, looking rattled.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
Put me through to the Colonel, no he’s not expecting me. Yes, I know he is retired. Tell him its Winfield and its urgent, he will take my call.
EXT.STATE ARCHIVES – MIDDAY
Duncan arrives in the Capitol City and parks at the building housing the state archives, he pulls an empty file box from his trunk before going inside.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I need all palarm creek land records prior to 1951
ARCHIVES ASSISTANT
Here are land records, arial photograph, platts and newspapers are still on microphish in the corner
DUNCAN SMALLS
Finds promising records, some sketchy transactions between the fed, the state and fed funding
finds records transferring the land to the state and the federal grant to damn the creek and create the lake. Starts making copies to go in his file box.
As he is making copies he gets a call from the hospital that hitomi has been in a car accident. He quickly dumps the files in the “reshelve” bin and rushes out.
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM – EARLY EVENING
He rushes an hour away to the hospital, through traffic and road construction.
Local police are in the waiting room, waiting for him. Question him about his whereabouts today if he knows of anyone that would want to hurt her.
Learns that she was followed then purposefully run off the road by two black cars that left the scene. By the time he is finished with the police, Hitomi is asleep on pain meds. Attending says she has a broken wrist and a concussion they want to keep her overnight for observation.
His car was broken into at the hospital and the copies of the records stolen. He returns home to find his apartment ran sacked.
INT.DUNCAN APT – NEXT MORNING
he is cleaning up the mess, putting things back in place. Looks out the window at his car trunk being held shut with string due to the broken lock, gives him an idea.
He calls the state archives and asks if they could make additional copies of the files he left in the bin for reshelving.
After waiting on hold, the files are missing and not reshelved. Hitmomi was targeted while he was out of town, the records were stolen where anyone knew he would come to see her and now the originals are gone, he’s onto something big.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – MID MORNING
He is called to the Chancellors office
The chancellor is visibly angry, doesn’t appreciate Duncan going over Prof Winfield and his head to the Regent.
Chancellor puts his position on suspension for going to the Regent, he can’t remove him from the PhD program since the Regent approved it. He can suspend his teaching position and require him to see the therapist to stay in the program.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 2 TP – Midpoint
What I learned doing this assignment is to push the protagonist forward in his new found sense of exploration, until his world pushes back against his half hearted attempt.
EXT.STATE ARCHIVES – MIDDAY
Duncan arrives in the Capitol City and parks at the building housing the state archives, he pulls an empty file box from his trunk before going inside.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I need all palarm creek land records prior to 1951
ARCHIVES ASSISTANT
Here are land records, arial photograph, platts and newspapers are still on microphish in the corner
DUNCAN SMALLS
Finds promising records, some sketchy transactions between the fed, the state and fed funding
finds records transferring the land to the state and the federal grant to damn the creek and create the lake. Starts making copies to go in his file box.
As he is making copies he gets a call from the hospital that hitomi has been in a car accident. He quickly dumps the files in the “reshelve” bin and rushes out.
INT.EMERGENCY ROOM – EARLY EVENING
He rushes an hour away to the hospital, through traffic and road construction.
Local police are in the waiting room, waiting for him. Question him about his where abouts today if he knows of anyone that would want to hurt her.
Learns that she was followed then purposefully run off the road by two black cars that left the scene. By the time he is finished with the police, Hitomi is asleep on pain meds. Attending says she has a broken wrist and a concussion they want to keep her overnight for observation.
His car was broken into at the hospital and the copies of the records stolen. He returns home to find his apartment ran sacked.
INT.DUNCAN APT – NEXT MORNING
he is cleaning up the mess, putting things back in place. Looks out the window at his car trunk being held shut with string due to the broken lock, gives him an idea.
He calls the state archives and asks if they could make additional copies of the files he left in the bin for reshelving.
After waiting on hold, the files are missing and not reshelved. Hitmomi was targeted while he was out of town, the records were stolen where anyone knew he would come to see her and now the originals are gone, he’s onto something big.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – MID MORNING
He is called to the Chancellors office
The chancellor is visibly angry, doesn’t appreciate Duncan going over Prof Winfield and his head to the Regent.
Chancellor puts his position on suspension for going to the Regent, he can’t remove him from the PhD program since the Regent approved it. It is however well within his power to suspend his teaching position and require him to see the therapist to stay in the program.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Act 2 Middle Scenes
What I learned from doing this assignment is that I needed to go back to Act 1 to generate more setup scenes, more pieces on the board to fall down.
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – DAY
Seated at a library computer Duncan is searching library archives and declassified information about locations of US Japanese internment camps, student library staff walks up.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hi there.
LIBRARY STAFF
Oh, its you again, Great. Did you book this computer time? You can’t just take it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Uh, no I don’t think so
LIBRARY STAFF
I know you didn’t, because someone is waiting. I need you to go over to the reading area or leave.
He moves to the overstuffed chair in the reading area with one book he has and falls asleep. He dreams of the camp again, he sees men in lab coats and it begins to rain metal paperclips. The paperclips quickly pile up and he cannot move, they are about to over take his face he begins to panic. He wakes from the dream with a scream, the book goes flying the whole library is now looking at him, Including the Chancellor who is leading an Alumni tour group. He locks eyes with the Chancellor.
INT.UNIVERSITY CONFERENCE ROOM – NEXT DAY
A board of professors including the Lead Panel Professor is meeting to accept PhD thesis themes for Science Doctorates, Duncan slips into the back of the room.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Calling Candidate William Trilio
Young man well dressed but in clothes that are not his size approaches the seated panel of professors.
PHD CANDIDATE 3
Thank you board members, the theme for my thesis is “Cell Mytosis in high altitude environments”
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Very nice, (he looks at the other members nodding their heads) Approved…Next Candidate (looking at his list) Oh, that was the last one.
Duncan rushes forward and steps forward in front of the panel
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Yes, may I help you…did we skip you?
DUNCAN SMALLS
No, sir…I’m not on the list but I would like to declare my theme
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
I appreciate your enthusiasm but that is not how this works, however you do look familiar
DUNCAN SMALLS
Yes, sir I’m Duncan Smalls, I was here presenting for the History Board last week.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
(has a little chuckle) That is definitely not how this works, this is the Science Board. I do remember you now, are you still working on it?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m ready sir, I’m sorry to interrupt or break the rules, I promised you I would deliver.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
No one is here from the History Department. But since we finished early and being that I am on the State Board of Regents, I’ll listen, go ahead.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Thank you sssir, My theme, my thesis theme that is….is Undocumented
(his voice shaking, he closes his eyes takes a deep breath and sees the paperclips raining again, then abruptly blurts out) Undocumented U.S. Japanese Internment Camps and their relationship to Operation Paperclip.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
That sounds interesting, thank for doing what you promised, even as unorthodoxed as it maybe. I’ll take it upon myself to approve it and assign Professor Winfield to supervise it…Thank you
INT.DUNCAN APT – EARLY EVENING
He and Hitomi discuss him declaring in such an odd way and the reason why he added operation paperclip from a dream. She asks about him seeing the therapist again, he refuses.
INT.COFFEE SHOP – NEXT MORNING
Normal morning routine, she mentions the therapist again, he gets weird about it and spots the little girl in the coffee shop.
She presses about the therapist when he seems to be staring at nothing and he says ‘she doesn’t understand’, we see a slight trigger in Hitomi.
INT.PROFFESOR WINFIELDS OFFICE – SAME TIME
At his computer drinking coffee and catching up on administrative work when he reads about his assignment to Duncan’s thesis declaration.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
What in the Holy Hell? What the fuck can he possibly he know?
He pulls his cell from his pockets and dials, looking rattled.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
Put me through to the Colonel, no he’s not expecting me. Tell him its Winfield and its urgent, he will take my call.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Reaction to the turning point
What I learned from doing this assignment is to delve into how the protagonist struggles in their reaction to have a level of choice while still being a victim to some degree.
ACT 2
INT.DUNCAN APT – EARLY MORNING
Hitomi had a vehicle pileup of several cars due to local road construction on I-40 and came home at 2 am.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Duncan hurriedly as he is walking out the door mentions to his Hitomi Nakamura he can’t do coffee, he is going to see a staff therapist or declare his thesis theme and nervously repeats himself. A half asleep Hitomi grabs him by the sleeve.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Therapist? I mean (rubbing her eyes) Therapy is always a good thing but this is sudden. I’m confused, what does a therapist have to do with your theme?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I was given umm….its an ultimatum from the chancellor
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Wait.. wait, you spoke with the chancellor and you have an ultimatum? I’m so lost, after spending the night stitching up bleeding children, I’m trying to catch up here.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Somehow, the Chancellor found out about my nightmare or um.. my visions…I’m not sure which or how but he said either declare it as a thesis theory or declare I’m crazy.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Surely, he didn’t say crazy
DUNCAN SMALLS
Well, no not crazy but he did say declare or go see a therapist.
HITOMI NAKAMURA
Consider, that both might be an option. Declare to take some pressure off and see a therapist. Honey, in the span of a decade you lost your entire family…a therapist is not an all-together terrible idea. You should talk to someone about it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know how to talk about it, and now I don’t have a choice
HITOMI NAKAMURA
It’s ok, no one knows how…just go talk and declare..do both and know that you will be ok
INT.THERAPIST OFFICE – MORNING
Opens the therapists office door, peeking in shyly
DUNCAN SMALLS
Morning, I don’t have an appt. I’m Duncan Smalls
THERAPIST
It’s quite all right, I normally do my admin paperwork at this time. I can work you in, come on in.
Duncan comes in and takes the seat that she motions too
THERAPIST
So, how can I help?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I don’t know, not sure how this works.
THERAPIST
Fair enough, tell me about the people or situations in your life where you feel ….lets say pressured or stressed.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Well, I’m a phD candidate, that is the definition of stress and I also teach level 1 history courses.
THERAPIST
That is good clarity, is your family supportive in your efforts?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I..I have no family, my parents died in a car accident when I was 14. My grandmother who raised me after that died when i was a junior in college…that’s really it.
THERAPIST
Ok, so who are you close too, who do you spend time with?
DUNCAN SMALLS
Uhhh, my girlfriend Hitomi..not sure I have anyone else.
THERAPIST
Good to know, anything else that I should know about..maybe anything that doesn’t fit, or quite make sense with what you would expect?
DUNCAN SMALLS
I do see…I think I have seen a little asian maybe japanese girl.
THERAPIST
Got it, has anyone else seen or hear this girl?
INT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
Duncan sees Professor Winfield in the Hallway near the History department teachers lounge and corners him
DUNCAN SMALLS
Prof Winfield, can I bother you? I believe I’m ready to declare my theme.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
I’m running behind but can give you two minutes and two minutes only.
DUNCAN SMALLS
My thesis theme will be “Undocumented Japanese internment camps and their relationship to operation paperclip”
Professor Winfield physically moves back slightly in reaction, he is obviously triggered
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
Tha..that’s a ridiculous choice..pure conspiracy theory and the board will reject it.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(intrigued by the reaction)
I’m not sure why its ridiculous, the object of a PhD is to uncover the unknown.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
(starting to walk away)
Look, declare whatever you want but that is nonsense
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Finished Act 1
What I learned from doing this assignment is that I got rougher to move faster, worried less about proper format or true dialogue and just captured the general idea of what I want to shift or change. I likely need more or different scenes in future drafts but it feels great to crank this out in just 2 1/2 hours!
ACT 1
INT.UNIVERSITY CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
A panel of tenured professors is seated in a single table facing the room of candidates, from behind we see an unknown student
PHD CANDIDATE 1
My theme for my thesis is on the economic and over crowding conditions that led to the black plague.
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Approved and thank you…Calling Duncan Smalls
Approaches the seated panel standing before them nervously
LEAD PANEL PROFESSOR
Go on, please present your theme
DUNCAN SMALLS
I’m working on it
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
You are late blah blah blah, you are on thin ice
Walks out into the hallway and makes a call
DUNCAN SMALLS
Tells girlfiend he will be home late, he must be in the library tonight
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – EARLY EVENING
At a large table in the library with books and papers scattered, a woman in early 30’s arrives in hospital scrubs. We can see on her scrubs she is a MD, with two cups of coffee in hand.
DUNCAN SMALLS
No cofee allowed in this section
GIRLFRIEND
Comments on no girlfriend allowed at home alone either after a long day at the hospital, offers help
DUNCAN SMALLS
Wishes she could help but can’t seem to help himself
GIRLFRIEND
Maybe share process for elimination, maybe its too hash, i do troubleshoot medical data all day
DUNCAN SMALLS
I must get this done, its life or death
GIRLFRIEND
Funny so is my job, life or death that is. I’m not scared. Maybe this is a bit of performance anxiety (she reaches between his legs under the table) Trust me, I’m a doctor
DUNCAN SMALLS
He says something about that not being the fix for this situation
GIRLFRIEND
She brings up him having stress hives when they met in the ER and how she fixed them that night.
INT.DUNCAN APT – EARLY MORNING
GF finds him asleep amid a pile of papers and books at the table. She gently removes the book from his chest and he begins to wake
GIRLFRIEND
When did you get up, did you sleep here long, i didn’t notice you leave the bed
DUNCAN SMALLS
He asks what time it is, (he is incorherent)
GIRLFRIEND
Almost 7, get in the shower and I’ll grab you some clothes
She is standing outside the shower that is running holding some clothes and a towel
GIRLFRIEND
You don’t have to run yourself down for people to be proud. If your family were here they would be proud
DUNCAN SMALLS
They are dead, so we don’t know
GIRLFRIEND
I get it, med school was hard and residency isn’t much better at resident pay but things take time. You can force them or they break down
DUNCAN SMALLS
(takes the towel) I need this phd, to one day get tenure. No different than your MD but i need the winning theme
GIRLFRIEND
Lets just get some coffee and breakfast. Set aside talk of tenure or staff physician struggles
INT.COFFEE SHOP
They enter the coffee shop, others are being shown to tables. The waitress just waves them on with a familar smile, they walk to their spot.
WAITRESS
brings coffee
I already signalled the cook, i assume the regular
GIRLFRIEND
Yeah, same ole same ole..thank you..small talk
DUNCAN
Asks if she can just bring a whole pot, brings up waking up to write
Girlfriend
I thought we agreed to not talk about work
DUNCAN SMALLS
He says she agreed with herself, he can’t think about anything else right now
GIRLFRIEND
she talks about how trying to force the creative process might be the thing that is choking it off. If he takes a step back then something might show up.
Food comes, more work discussion they loose track of time and ends up running late for class.
INT.CLASSROOM – LATER
Duncan in a rush walks into a class that is settled and waiting for him
Duncan smalls
apologizes for being late, asks the students a question and confuses a term, they correct him.
Duncan smalls
Acknoledges the correct warmly, yawns then continues on the subject
Student 1
Asks about is operation paperclip was real, did nazi scientists come here
Duncan
Discuses the subject with the student and makes a quick note midsentence in his book
Student 1
Quips that Duncan owes him if he uses that for a thesis
Duncan
Continues with the subject has them discuss with each other
While they discuss he makes more notes in his notebook
EXT.DUNCANS APT – LATER
Duncan is making some notes and thinking, looks a little less stressed like he maybe onto something.
Gilfriend
Asks what or how he is
Duncan
Says he maybe onto something
Writes faster not looking up at her, she reaches under his chin lifting his gaze to her
Girlfriend
Says something about her needing to be onto something
Climbs between him and the table blocking his work
Duncan
Lightly argues about needing to keep working
Girlfriend
she makes a comment about being a medical professional and he should trust her, they have sex.
He wakes up the next morning fully rested and
Girlfriend
she comments on her treatment being effective
INT.COFFEE SHOP –
They follow the same entrance routine with the waitress, we sense this is their routine.
Duncan smalls
Talks about feeling better about things in general and slept great
Girlfriend
Smiles and nods, comments about he should listen to her or at least give in
Duncan smalls
Agrees with her and that things are coming together and just take time and sometimes a break
They have more pleasant small talk with a general feeling of emotional improvement
INT.CLASSROOM – DAY
He is in the classroom and students are still entering, he is not late and looking well rested.
Student 2
Comments about him looking much better than lately
Student 1
Quips about it being due to stealing his idea
Student 3
Jokes that he must have gotten some last night
Duncan smalls
Replies that yes he did get some, get some sleep
Duncan is writing something on the whiteboard and hears a gigle
Duncan smalls
Is something funny
Students
Have no idea what he is talking about they heard nothing
He turns over his shoulder and sees a flash child size running behind a chair. He looks away and then back.
He rubs his eyes
Student
Is he tired again so fast
He teaches more after a moment sees the flash out of the corner of his eye again.
Duncan sees the girl standing in the aisle, small japanese girl about 7 years old.
Duncan stops Mid sentence and stares
Students turn no students see her and comment on Duncan’s reaction.
Duncan smalls
Dismisses class early, give some assigment
Students are almost completely gone, he is turned with his back to the class packing his bag and hears the gigle again
He turns quickly knocking a book off, the last student leaving pauses
Student
You ok?
Duncan smalls
Was that you?
Student
Was that what?
Awkward moment and the student leaves, then does Duncan.
INT.DUNCANS APT – EARLY EVENING
Duncan comes home waves to his girlfriend as he passes her and says nothing looking odd or in shock
Girlfiend
So much for being well rested blah blah
Duncan
Odd day, don’t want to talk
Girlfriend
You could ask about my day, talks about some strange cases she had
Notices him lost in his head, being odd and not listening
Girlfrined
She switches and starts talking nonsense about alice in wonder land to see if he notices, he doesn’t
Girlfriend
She presses until he snaps
Duncan
He tells her about the sitings of the little girl, he thinks she wouldn’t understand and there is relationship tension about the “not understanding comment”.
INT.DUNCAN’S APT – NIGHT
view gliding above water on the lake at night, then looking down to see the girl under the surface, maybe a body, could be unconscious.
His dream takes him under the water down to her
The water disappears and he is on dry land in daylight watching from inside the camp in the 1940’s by clothing of the guards.
He wakes in horror and blurry eyes thinks he see’s little wet foot prints
INT.COFFEE SHOP – MORNING
Duncan smalls
Feeling of relief, a bit of normalcy as Duncan and his GF walk into the coffee shop, sit at their regular table.
Girlfiend
Seems annoyed, still a little off but being civil
Waitress walks up already carrying two cups of coffee for the regulars.
Duncan smalls
He is more chatty with the waitress, trying to smooth over awkwardness with his girl
He is touching common items on the table, reassuring himself that this is real
Duncan smalls
Mentions its going to be a good day, he hopes she has a good day at the hospital and he will make lots of progress on his paper
Girlfriend
Quips that she wouldn’t understand
They finish eating in awkward silence and part
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – LATER
Duncan looking tired with a to go coffee in his hands says hello to other teachers and professors seeking connection after the cold breakfast
tries not to make eye contact with the professor winfield (the old sargent).
DUNCAN SMALLS
mentions his crazy nightmare about some camp full of asians in the lake. says isn’t that odd, trying to strike up conversation and maybe laugh it off
Professor Winfield looks to be listening from another table and disturbed.
PROFESSOR WINFIELD
suddenly and almost angrily that he should stop dreaming and get to work on this thesis, he is wasting a seat, storms out.
INT.CLASSROOM – MID MORNING
He teaches another day of classes
He sees a small silhouette run behind the chairs more than once, no one else reacts.
Duncan smalls
(under his breath) don’t react
This happens more than once and students overhear
Students
Are you talking to us or yourself
INT.CLASSROOM – LATER
He questions what is real, is his theme idea turned into a nightmare now causing halucinations?
Grading papers in the empty classroom he talks to himself more, asking if maybe the months of stress are finally breaking him down
What is the differnce between ideas, dreams, halucinations
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – DAY
Duncan amasses a large number of books and his laptop, searching to find evidence to support the dream. Hoping it is inspriation and not madness.
He continues to find nothing
Duncan
Questions staff members, annoyed asking for more resource material
Staff
This is all we can find, what you want doesn’t exist
Duncan
Pushes harder, searches more growing more frantic
and become irate with staff when he doesn’t find what he expects. His demeanor and reputation are slipping further.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – DAY
Duncan smalls
Out of frustration Duncan begins asking about secret camps/
Thinking he must have read it and this is a fuzzy memory surfacing and not nightmares or ghosts!
Teacher
I have never heard of such
Duncan smalls
maybe some were off the books.
He is starting to think this might be possible, the alternative is that he is slipping into mental illness.
Unnoticed by Duncan behind him while he talks the Professor Winfield slips out of the room quietly, looking concerned.
Professor winfield
is in the hallway alone making a phone call while checking for anyone listening, looking upset.
INT.CLASSROOM/ HALLWAY /CHANCELLORS OFFICE – DAY
Duncan is in class and his cell rings, he ignores it and it rings again and again. Finally out of frustration he reaches in his pocket
DUNCAN SMALLS
(index finger in the air to the students)
Hold on .. Yes this is Duncan
CHANCELLOR’S ADMIN
Mr. Smalls, this is Felicia the Chancellor’s admin assistant, the chancellor would like to see you.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Me?..He wants to see m..
CHANCELLOR’S ADMIN
(interrupts)
Yes you and 2 pm is the only time that works for him, which is in 15 minutes.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Uhhh, Ok, I’ll be there
Hangs up
STUDENT 1
Did you say the Axis powers were well supplied or under supplied going into Russia?..I think I wrote it down wrong
DUNCAN SMALLS
Umm, under, over.. Yes undersupplied thus the push toward oil fields.
(under his breath to himself)
The chancellor wants to see me? I’ve never met the man
INT.UNIVERSITY HALL – 10 MINUTES LATER
Duncan is walking down the hall lost in his head as to why he is being summoned. He nears the Chancellors office and passes Professor Winfield (the old Sargent) headed the other way.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hey Prof… (stops himself mid greeting as he notices the Professor refuses to make eye contact)
He nears the door as it is just now closing on its own. He walks into the outer office and looks toward Felica.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – MOMENTS LATER
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hi I’m Du
CHANCELLOR’S ADMIN
(interrupts pointing to the Chancellors door still open)
I know.. Go in, he’s waiting
He walks in, the Chancellor elbows on his chairs arms and hands clasped together in front of him. Duncan reaches to shake his hand and the chancellor doesn’t reach back.
CHANCELLOR
Just please have a seat, this should be short.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(mumbles in confusion) Ok, sir
CHANCELLOR
I understand that you are a paid teaching assistant and a phd candidate?
Chancellor motions for a response of acknowledgment to which Duncan nods.
CHANCELLOR
It has been brought to my attention that as of late you have been, lets say off of your game.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Sir I can ex..
CHANCELLOR
(interrupts with a hand motion)
Let me be brief and get to the point. I expect staff and potential staff to be on point, on time and to uphold the values of this institution.
I’m not a historian and do not know about any Secret Military institution’s.
( stops himself with a gesture and changes tracks)
Look, we all have our moments of stress where we run thin and fail to distinguish between working theories and facts.
Duncan is speechless with a stunned look, trying to process where this is headed.
CHANCELLOR
Slides a business card across the desk to Duncan
If this is all confusion about theory and facts, great. Declare your thesis and do your research!
His hand still on the business card and taps it with his index finger.
If its not, reach out to our staff therapist and she can help.
Leans back in his chair and clasps his hands again
I knew you would understand and do the right thing.
Motions him toward the door, turning back to his computer. Duncan walks out in a numb stupor. Stands outside in the hallway briefly.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(talking to himmself)
Soo..I either declare my nightmares as my thesis subject, or I openly admit I’m loosing it? There is really only one choice, to declare.
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Turning Point 1 Scene
What I learned doing this assignment is the beauty that can come in the flow, the protagonist being thrust into a situation of bad choices and finally choosing what will be his evolution.
Turning Point 1 Sequence
INT.CLASSROOM/ HALLWAY /CHANCELLORS OFFICE – DAY
Duncan is in class and his cell rings, he ignores it and it rings again and again. Finally out of frustration he reaches in his pocket
DUNCAN SMALLS
(index finger in the air to the students)
Hold on .. Yes this is Duncan
CHANCELLOR’S ADMIN
Mr. Smalls, this is Felicia the Chancellor’s admin assistant, the chancellor would like to see you.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Me?..He wants to see m..
CHANCELLOR’S ADMIN
(interrupts)
Yes you and 2 pm is the only time that works for him, which is in 15 minutes.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Uhhh, Ok, I’ll be there
Hangs up
STUDENT 1
Did you say the Axis powers were well supplied or under supplied going into Russia?..I think I wrote it down wrong
DUNCAN SMALLS
Umm, under, over.. Yes undersupplied thus the push toward oil fields.
(under his breath to himself)
The chancellor wants to see me? I’ve never met the man
INT.UNIVERSITY HALL – 10 MINUTES LATER
Duncan is walking down the hall lost in his head as to why he is being summoned. He nears the Chancellors office and passes Professor Winfield (the old Sargent) headed the other way.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hey Prof… (stops himself mid greeting as he notices the Professor refuses to make eye contact)
He nears the door as it is just now closing on its own. He walks into the outer office and looks toward Felica.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – MOMENTS LATER
DUNCAN SMALLS
Hi I’m Du
CHANCELLOR’S ADMIN
(interrupts pointing to the Chancellors door still open)
I know.. Go in, he’s waiting
He walks in, the Chancellor elbows on his chairs arms and hands clasped together in front of him. Duncan reaches to shake his hand and the chancellor doesn’t reach back.
CHANCELLOR
Just please have a seat, this should be short.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(mumbles in confusion) Ok, sir
CHANCELLOR
I understand that you are a paid teaching assistant and a phd candidate?
Chancellor motions for a response of acknowledgment to which Duncan nods.
CHANCELLOR
It has been brought to my attention that as of late you have been, lets say off of your game.
DUNCAN SMALLS
Sir I can ex..
CHANCELLOR
(interrupts with a hand motion)
Let me be brief and get to the point. I expect staff and potential staff to be on point, on time and to uphold the values of this institution.
I’m not a historian and do not know about any Secret Military institution’s.
( stops himself with a gesture and changes tracks)
Look, we all have our moments of stress where we run thin and fail to distinguish between working theories and facts.
Duncan is speechless with a stunned look, trying to process where this is headed.
CHANCELLOR
Slides a business card across the desk to Duncan
If this is all confusion about theory and facts, great. Declare your thesis and do your research!
His hand still on the business card and taps it with his index finger.
If its not, reach out to our staff therapist and she can help.
Leans back in his chair and clasps his hands again
I knew you would understand and do the right thing.
Motions him toward the door, turning back to his computer. Duncan walks out in a numb stupor. Stands outside in the hallway briefly.
DUNCAN SMALLS
(talking to himmself)
Soo..I either declare my nightmares as my thesis subject, or I openly admit I’m loosing it?
0 -
Charles Ferrell’s Inciting Incident
What I learned from doing this assignment to add more character setup of normalcy with average tension before igniting the inciting scene.
ACT 1
INT.UNIVERSITY CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
Beginning: A panel of tenured professors is seated in a single table facing the room of candidates and calls Duncan Smalls.
Middle: Duncan nervously explains that his concept for his PhD thesis is almost ready, the board informs him that he is past the theme declaration deadline. The stern Pol Sci professor (old Sargent) lets him know his candidacy is on thin ice.
END: Duncan is in a hallway calling his girlfriend letting her know he will be late, he has more research to do in the library.
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – EARLY EVENING
His girlfriend shows up with coffee to help him research wearing scrubs and we get some exposition on her and the relationship.
INT.COFFEE SHOP – NEXT MORNING
Tired but a functioning Duncan and his girlfriend have coffee and establish the morning routine.
INT.CLASSROOM – LATER
Duncan teaches about history and the US reaction to WWII. He stops mid sentence to make a note. Students joke if he finally got an idea for his phd thesis.
EXT.UNIVERSITY HALLWAY – NEXT MORNING
Duncan with togo coffee cup in hand and an over stuffed shoulder bad walks into class to teach yawning.
Inciting incident
INT.CLASSROOM – DAY
Duncan see the little asian girl while teaching, no one else can see her. He looks away and then back, he begins to repeat himself nervously. Disturbing!
Beginning: Duncan is teaching a college class, where you learn name, position. A little runs behind back row chairs and no students react.
Middle:Duncan sees the girl standing in the aisle, small japanese girl about 7 years old, no students see her and comment on Duncan’s reaction.
End: Little girl in the back seat of his car causes near miss, other person sees no one in the seat. Duncan breaks down emotionally at the steering wheel in the parking lot. He assumes it is stress.
Reaction to Inciting Incident
INT.DUNCANS APT – EARLY EVENING
Beginning: Duncan comes home waves to his girlfriend as he passes her and says nothing in shock
Middle: She follows him asking about he shock, she asks how his theme is going. He reacts raw with defeat at what he belives is his failing mental/emotional state.
End: He tells her about the sitings of the little girl, he thinks she wouldn’t understand and there is relationship tension already. He thinks he is loosing his mind.
INT.DUNCAN’S APT – NIGHT
Beginning: camera view gliding above water on the lake, then looking down to see the girl under the surface
Middle: The water disappears and he is watching from inside the camp in the 1940’s.
End: He wakes in horror and blurry eyes thinks he see’s little wet foot prints
INT.COFFEE SHOP – MORNING
Beginning: Feeling of relief, a bit of normalcy as Duncan and his GF walk into the coffee shop, sit at their regular table.
Middle: Waitress walks up already carrying two cups of coffee for the regulars, Duncan asks for the whole pot today.
End: they discuss his lack of focus for his phd thesis as yawns through the conversation.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – LATER
Beginning: Duncan looking tired with a to go coffee in his hands says hello to other teachers and professors tries not to make eye contact with the Pol Science professor (the old sargent).
Middle: Duncan mentions his crazy nightmare about some camp full of asians in the lake never mentions seeing the girl in class. The Old Sargent looks disturbed.
End: The old sargent suddenly and almost angrily that he should stop dreaming and get to work on this thesis, he is wasting a seat, storms out.
INT.CLASSROOM – MID MORNING
He teaches another day of classes and periodically he sees a small silhouette run behind the chairs, no one else reacts.
INT.DUNCAN’S APT /CLASS- MORNING
Sleep deprivation from nightmares is starting to affect his performance and make him question what is real or a dream. Did he dream about the camp or is it a thesis idea coming up from the back of his mind?
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – DAY
Duncan amasses a large number of books for research and become irate with staff when he doesn’t find what he expects. His demeanor and reputation are slipping further.
Next two scenes lock him in
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – DAY
Beginning: Duncan begins asking about secret camps, maybe some were off the books. He is starting to think this might be possible, something in the realm of belief.
Middle: Unnoticed by Duncan behind him while he talks the Old Sargent slips out of the room quietly.
End: The old sargent is in the hallway alone making a phone call while checking for anyone listening, looking upset. He suspects Duncan may have found something in his thesis search and is calling in backup.
INT.CLASSROOM/ HALLWAY /CHANCELLORS OFFICE – DAY
Beginning: Duncan receives a message to come meet with the chancellor this afternoon. He has never met the man before.
Middle: Duncan is on his way to meet with the chancellor after being called in, he passes the Pol Sci professor in the hallway going the opposite way.
Ending: Duncan is put on notice about his performance and conspiracy theories. His mental state questioned, suggests a staff therapist. He is accused of putting the University reputation in danger.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by Giles.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by
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Charles Ferrell’s ACT 1: Opening Scenes
What I learned doing this assignment is the value and simplicity in having so many phases of development.
ACT 1
INT.CLASSROOM – DAY
Duncan see the little asian girl while teaching, no one else can see her. He looks away and then back, he begins to repeat himself nervously. Disturbing!
Beginning: Duncan is teaching a college class, where you learn name, position. A little runs behind back row chairs and no students react.
Middle:Duncan sees the girl standing in the aisle, small japanese girl about 7 years old, no students see her and comment on Duncan’s reaction.
End: Little girl in the back seat of his car causes near miss, other person sees no one in the seat.
INT.DUNCANS APT – EARLY EVENING
Girlfriend asks about him being disturbed/off, he starts to mention the little girl but stops himself.
INT.DUNCAN’S APT – NIGHT
Under the lake nightmare, turns into being inside the camp and meeting the girl in the dream
INT.COFFEE SHOP – MORNING
Duncan is having coffee with his girlfriend obviously rattled. Drinking more coffee than normal.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – LATER
Beginning: Duncan looking tired with a to go coffee in his hands says hello to other teachers and professors including the Pol Science professor (the old sargent).
Middle: Duncan mentions his crazy nightmare about some camp full of asians in the lake never mentions seeing the girl. The Old Sargent looks disturbed.
End: The old sargent is in the hallway alone making a phone call while checking for anyone listening, looking upset.
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Charles Ferrell’s Beat Sheet 2
What I learned from doing this assignment is to look for another type of subtext, theme.
ACT 1
INT.CLASSROOM – DAY
Duncan see the little asian girl while teaching, no one else can see her. He looks away and then back, he begins to repeat himself nervously. Disturbing!
EXT.UNIVERSITY PARKING LOT – DAY
Little girl in the back seat of his car causes near miss, other person sees no one in the seat.
INT.DUNCANS APT – EARLY EVENING
Girlfriend asks about him being disturbed/off, he starts to mention the little girl but stops himself.
INT.DUNCAN’S APT – NIGHT
Under the lake nightmare, turns into being inside the camp and meeting the girl in the dream
INT.COFFEE SHOP – MORNING
Duncan is having coffee with his girlfriend obviously rattled. Drinking more coffee than normal with extra sugar.
INT.DUNCAN’S APT /CLASS- MORNING
Sleep deprivation from nightmares is starting to affect his performance and make him question what is real or a dream.
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – DAY
Duncan amasses a large number of books for research and become irate with staff when he doesn’t find what he expects.
INT.TEACHERS LOUNGE – DAY
Duncan begins asking about a secret camp and has details that spark the wrong interest.
INT.UNIVERSITY HALL – DAY
Duncan is on his way to meet with the chancellor after being called in, he passes the Pol Sci professor in the hallway going the opposite way.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – DAY
Duncan is put on notice about his performance and conspiracy theories. His mental state questioned, suggests a therapist.
ACT 2
INT.DUNCAN APT – EARLY MORNING
Duncan hurriedly as he is walking out the door mentions to his girlfriend he can’t do coffee, he is going to see a staff therapist and nervously repeats himself.
INT.THERAPIST OFFICE – MORNING
Intro, then the therapist asks about the camp conspiracy theories. He talks about his visions and dreams of the little girl.She asks if he has ever been medicated before
INT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
Duncan questions the Pol Sci & Military History professor about the area and Internment camps in the state. The Prof looses it and this confuses Duncan.
INT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
A picture of the Old Sargent is mailed to him, showing building rubble in the background where the lake is now.
EXT.UNIVERSITY CAMPUS – DAY
Duncan frantically posts copies of pictures around campus.
INT.UNIVERSITY LIBRARY – DAY
Falls asleep researching the picture, has a nightmare about the camp and disturbs an Alumni tour with the chancellor.
INT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
Duncan please on student radio for people to come forward with info about the Sargent.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – NIGHT
Chancellor puts his position on suspension and threatens his phd candidacy, Required to see a therapist.
ACT 3
INT.DUNCAN APT – NIGHT
Duncan struggles to stay awake to avoid another nightmare, finally doses off and has the most detail gruesome dream of all. Paces the room after waking searching for a solution.
EXT.LAKE DOCKS – NIGHT
Sneaking between lake front houses, looking for a boat and has some close calls at getting caught.
EXT.LAKE – NIGHT
He decides to search the lake for himself, borrowing a boat each night. More sleep deprivation
EXT.LAKE – LATER THAT NIGHT
He is arrested for theft of the boat and his car impounded. He spots the pol science professor watching.
EXT.DIRT ROAD – BEFORE DAWN
Taken by the police down a road and beat up before being taken to the jail.
INT.JAIL – MIDDAY
All charges are dropped by the boat owner and he is released.
EXT.UNIVERSITY – DAY
Gets out of jail, he has been fired, lost his campus housing apt, kicked out of phd program….all is lost
INT.COFFEE SHOP – AFTERNOON
He has a new insight, the Pol Science professor is the Old Sargent. Maybe tattoo, burn scars on the neck.
ACT 4
EXT.CONSTRUCTION SITE – NIGHT
Duncan breaks into the site, steals keys and begins to figure out how to operate a backhoe
EXT.LAKE LEVEE – DUSK
Starts to dig into the levee holding the lake.
INT.NEWS STUDIO – MORNING
The freeway has been flooded by a break in the levee, helicopters are on the way to the scene.
EXT.LAKE/HIGHWAY – MORNING
Exhausted Duncan is arrested for a second time watching the lake drain in a stupor.
EXT.LAKE – MORNING
Helicopters spot the foundations of a complex of buildings in the mud. Was he right?
INT.POL SCI PROF OFFICE – DAY
The professor is found dead from suicide. Signed letter detailing the facts of the events along with a box of pictures and evidence.
INT.CHANCELLORS OFFICE – DAY
Duncan reinstated job & phd program. All charges are dropped
INT.THERAPIST OFFICE – DAY
Under hypnosis, Duncan learns that he was the little asian girl in a past life. This was his plan for this life.
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Charles Ferrell’s High Speed Beat Sheet
What I learned from doing this assignment is how to transfer into beats, keeping it super high level and moving.
ACT 1
INT. Classroom – Day
Duncan see the little asian girl while teaching, no one else can see her. Disturbing!
INT. Duncan’s APT – Night
Sleep deprivation from nightmares is starting to affect his performance and make him question what is real or a dream.
INT.Teachers Lounge – Day
Duncan begins asking about a secret camp and has details that spark the wrong interest.
INT. Chancellors Office – Day
Duncan is put on notice about his performance and conspiracy theories. His mental state questioned, suggests a therapist.
ACT 2
INT. University – Day
A picture of the Old Sargent is mailed to him, showing building rubble in the background where the lake is now.
INT.University – Day
Duncan please on student radio for people to come forward with info about the Sargent, The picture is posted all around campus.
INT. Chancellors Office – Night
Chancellor puts his position on suspension and threatens his phd candidacy, Required to see a therapist.
ACT 3
EXT. Lake – Night
He decides to search the lake for himself, borrowing a boat each night. More sleep deprivation
EXT.Lake – Dawn
He is arrested for theft of the boat and his car impounded. He spots the pol science professor watching.
EXT.Jail/ University – Day
Gets out of jail, he has been fired, lost his campus housing apt, kicked out of phd program….all is lost
INT. Coffee Shop – Afternoon
He has a new insight, the Pol Science professor is the Old Sargent. Maybe tattoo.
ACT 4
EXT. Construction Site – Dusk
Take a stand, he steals a backhoe from the construction site. Starts to dig into the levee holding the lake.
INT. News Studio – Morning
The freeway has been flooded by a break in the levee, helicopters are on the way to the scene.
EXT.Lake/Highway – Morning
Exhausted Duncan is arrested for a second time watching the lake drain in a stupor.
EXT. Lake – Morning
Helicopters spot the foundations of a complex of buildings in the mud. Was he right?
INT. Pol Sci Prof office – Day
The professor is found dead from suicide. Signed letter detailing the facts of the events along with a box of pictures and evidence.
INT. Chancellors office – Day
Duncan reinstated job & phd program. All charges are dropped
INT. Therapist office – Day
Under hypnosis, Duncan learns that he was the little asian girl in a past life. This was his plan for this life.
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Charles Ferrell’s Transformational Events
What I learned doing this assignment is ARC, ARC, ARC.
Concept: Duncan Smalls a university teaching student and phd candidate in history, is being haunted by the ghost of a Japanese girl. She drives him to discover a long hidden secret internment camp, under a local lake. His life and his future begin to unravel. Duncan is torn between losing his mind or losing the life and future he has built.
Main Conflict: The ghost of the little girl is slowly driving him insane and into a direct collision course with the Agent and assured destruction.
· Old Ways:
· Duncan is an introvert and painfully shy unless he is talking about history.
· Only believes in facts and what he can put his hands or eyes on.
· Has no interest in conspiracy theories
· New Ways:
· Believes in the supernatural
· Open to possibility beyond known facts.
· Willing to take a public stand for injustice.
Transformational Events
1. He needs to realize that there is more than this present life
2. He needs to see his fixation with history as a purpose and not just an obsession or career
3. Decide to search for the hidden truth that is being revealed
4. Recognize the enemy is still alive and out to destroy anyone, to keep the secret
5. Believe and take a stand
6. Claim what he has earned for his new life
7. Come into the full realization and integration of his past life and the current
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Charles Ferrell’s 4 Act Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is my story works better by eliminating “the agent” and escalating the role of the old Sargent, I also believe the protagonist may need a love interest to complete what is at stake.
Concept: Duncan Smalls a university teaching student and phd candidate in history, is being haunted by the ghost of a Japanese girl. She drives him to discover a long hidden secret internment camp, under a local lake. His life and his future begin to unravel. Duncan is torn between losing his mind or losing the life and future he has built.
Main Conflict: The ghost of the little girl is slowly driving him insane and into a direct collision course with the Agent and assured destruction.
· Old Ways:
· Duncan is an introvert and painfully shy unless he is talking about history.
· Only believes in facts and what he can put his hands or eyes on.
· Has no interest in conspiracy theories
· New Ways:
· Believes in the supernatural
· Open to possibility beyond known facts.
· Willing to take a public stand for injustice.
Act 1:
Opening: Duncan is wrapping up a history lecture when he spots a little Asian girl standing in the aisle at the back of the class, he pauses in disbelief. Students turn to look and see nothing, questioning his focus. He gives an assignment and walks out rubbing his eyes.
Little girl show up his favorite bbq joint, so he asks the old man who owns it about the area, he was a laborer as a young man building the lake. He produced a box of old photos, including some old blurry photograph of a Sargent standing in front of a pile of concrete rubble.
Inciting Incident: Duncan begins to be haunted by the little girl by day and in his nightmares about a local secret internment camp. His asking questions around campus, posts a copy of the picture asking for information this causes the pol science professor (old sargent) to interfere.
Turning Point: He is pulled into the chancellors office and questioned about his conspiracy theories and his mental state questioned.
Act 2:
Conspiracy theories and ghost stories were never his thing. He has now pushed a button with someone, and he is in the middle of both with no turning back.
New plan: Find some answers, possibly focus his phd thesis about secret camps.
Plan in action: He presses hard for information and even puts out a request for anyone to come forward with information in the media includes the picture of the sargent.
Midpoint Turning Point: The chancellor suspends Duncan’s teaching position and his threatens his phd candidacy, forces him to start seeing a staff therapist as a condition to regain status.
Act 3:
Rethink everything
He is on the ropes; all he is worked for is on the line and he still can’t prove a thing.
New plan
He sends out flyers to former Corps of Engineers officers with pictures of the sargent.
He steals a boat and begins to dredge the lake with nets for evidence himself night after night, returning it before sunrise. Sleep deprived he grows more erratic.
He is arrested and his car impounded for theft, he spots the professor driving away from the area
New insight
The political science professor and the rumored old sargent are the same person. He is out to ruin him!
Turning Point: He gets out of jail to find out he is fired from the university and kicked out of the PHD program. His car is in impound and his university housing is taken away, jobless, carless, homeless and futureless.
Act 4:
Climax/Ultimate expression of the conflict
With nothing left to lose, he breaks into a nearby road construction site stealing a back hoe. He digs a massive hole in the lakes levee, flooding part of the town and major highway. As police are arresting him for a second time the news helicopters covering the story now can see the foundations of a large multibuilding complex in the mud.
Resolution
The professor/old sargent writes a tell all letter to the new media including evidence of the camp and his involvement. After which he commits suicide. The university wanting to be on the right side of history, restores Duncan’s status. Under public pressure all charges are dropped, he completes his phd thesis on the subject. In hypnosis with his staff psychologist, it is revealed that he was the little Asian girl in a past life.
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Charles Ferrell’s Character Interviews
What I learned by doing this assignment is to question the characters about their motivations, secret desires, weak points and strengths.
Genre Action / Drama
Duncan Smalls
Role in the story: Protagonist / Explorer / phd candidate, university teaching assistant
Age and description: 30, socially withdrawn and obsessed with history
Internal Journey: Withdrawn, loaner struggling for acceptance to center of public attention and potential leader.
External Journey: Mediocre history teacher a virtual unknown, to history maker who unearths what has been under everyone’s feet.
Motivation: Initially to quiet the voices, eventually to reveal the hidden tragic history.
Wound: painfully shy, abhors conflict and violence
Mission/Agenda: avenge the victims by revealing the tragedy
Secret: He was the little Asian girl
What makes them special? He is the only one who sees the ghosts and/or visions.
Traits: Organized to a fault, all things must be in place
Subtext: repeats himself
Flaw: Shuts down, disengages when challenged, narrow focus on himself
Values: Facts over beliefs, Integrity
Irony: His view of the world is driven on facts and evidence established over time, he is about to be confronted with the world of belief & the supernatural which cannot be proven.
What makes this the right character for this role? He lives a contained life, one comprised of safe calculated moves. His coming experience in the story forces him to believe, to step out of planned safe moves into risking all for others.
Tell me about yourself. “I’m just me and the rest is history….lol. I’m an assistant history professor and phd candidate….and the rest is history!. He he he..not really much to say
Why do you think you were called to this journey? I don’t about any calling, it was more like an intrusion, I never asked for this and why won’t she leave me alone?
Why you? Maybe its about history and I’m an expert, or maybe I’m a history expert because I was supposed to reveal it in this life.
You are up against <The agent, the Asian girl>. What is it about them that makes this journey even more difficult for you? This agent guy, whoever he is has connections, access, some unknown level of credibility that I don’t have to ruin my life. He evidently can take apart everything I have built. This little girl won’t leave me the hell alone, her problem should be her problem and not mine, but it is.
In order to survive or accomplish this, you are going to have to step way outside of your box. First of all there is nothing wrong with my box, except for you people who keep messing with it. You stay in yours and I’ll stay in mine and if I wanted to step out I could. I could make my thesis about this discovery and cement its place in the historical record for all to study and research. (under his breath) that was a statement, not a question. This will take me to the edge of ruin and in the end secure my future and tenure.
What changes do you expect to make and which of them will be the most difficult?
I don’t like the spotlight or to make waves. I have a strong appreciation for rules and order. I don’t believe in conspiracy theories of the government hiding things from us but if they did we should know about it. All history should be known.
What habits or ways of thinking do you think will be the most difficult to let go of?
Not challenging people, I hate confrontation
What fears, insecurities and wounds have held you back?
I’m more comfortable in the past ‘history’ than in my own present, my parents died at an early age, I was raised by my elderly grandmother and books were my only friend.
What skills, background or expertise makes you well-suited to face this conflict or antagonist?
If there is evidence, I can find the trail. Research is what I’m the best at, the facts can’t be hidden forever. I spend every day on campus, college students love a good cause to get behind. This agent is one guy, who thinks he is only up against one guy.
What are you hiding from the other characters? What don’t you want them to know?
What do you think of <the Antagonist>?
Tell me your side of this whole conflict / story. These visitations, the visions are driving me crazy..I honestly feel like I’m loosing my mind but at the same time it all feels oddly familiar. I don’t believe in ghosts but this feels a bit like home.
What does it do for your life if you succeed here? I could gain my phd , tenure, industry recognition and write a new chapter in history that has been hidden.
Ghost of the little girl
Role in the story: Antagonist / Change Agent
Age range and Description: 8 to 10, apparition of a small Japanese American girl
Internal Journey: from innocent believer in freedom, to victim of racial hatred
External Journey: American girl to unjustly imprisoned victim of medical experiments
Motivation: Vengeance and Recognition
Wound: She was murdered in the camp along with her family
Mission/Agenda: to get the world to listen
Secret: her and her family’s deaths along with the camp were wiped from all records, their suffering has been kept secret
What makes them special? As a ghost she can appear anywhere, even in the dreams of the living
Traits: elusive, persistent, methodical
Subtext: responds with escalation and anger
Flaw: Blindly driven by her victim status
Values: injustice should have no place to hide
Irony: looks innocent and was killed at a young age but has the experience of humankinds potential for cruelty driven by hatred & fear.
What makes this the right character for this role? She is the only one who possesses the hidden knowledge along with the desire for reveal and cannot be silenced any longer. She is also the previous incarnation of the main character.
Tell me about yourself. I was born in California to Japanese immigrant parents, we were rounded up in the middle of the night and taken by our own government because we are Japanese or of Japanese decent.
Having to do with this journey, what are your strengths and weaknesses? My strength is that I’m a ghost, I can walk through walls, you can’t kill or harm me, I can show up in your nightmare’s. Weakness is that I am a ghost, people resist believing in me or what I show them as fact.
Why are you committed to making the Protagonist fail? Or for a relationship movie, why are you committed to making them change? He needs to understand that his whole life has been leading up to this, there is no more ignoring or delaying the truth. He needs to change and step into the possibility of who he can and must be to make this happen. His current ways of being must fail, they must die off and be shed like a cocoon that no longer serves him.
What do you get out of winning this fight / succeeding in your plan / taking down your competition? Vengeance and recognition through the facts getting out, uncovering this painful secret that has literally been buried right under the entire town’s noses. No one is ever completely in the right, in war. There are no good guys.
What drives you toward your mission / agenda, even in the face of danger, ruin, or death? Since my death, I have thought about nothing else but this for decades. I have groomed Duncan’s subconscious to be driven and obsessed with the past and now that must be blown wide open.
What secrets must you keep to succeed? What other secrets do you keep out of fear / insecurity? That Duncan the protagonist was me in a past life, Duncan and most of this western society is not equipped to handle that fact.
Compared to other people like you, what makes you special? I gave all simply because of the color of my skin, my family and I suffered greatly in secret and no one knows! I came back as a white male, educated in history for this sole purpose, for this time, for this moment.
What do you think of <the Protagonist>? We are the same, this current life of his has its advantages and its hindrances. Being a white male in this society is what I have waited patiently for, his education and obsession with history is my own doing. But this mind’s leaning toward being an introvert is not helpful, that is my greatest battle with him.
Tell me your side of this whole conflict / story. I’m hurt, I’m angry and rapidly growing impatient. My young appearance is far from innocent compared to what I was subjected too. I know that things take time but enough is enough, it is time our treatment be known. The internment camp was run by the US government and the experiments led by Nazi doctors brought to the US. The war was over and we were still being held and experimented on, all for the sake of producing bio-weapons.
The Agent
Role in the story: Antagonist / Villain
Age range and Description: 50’s / pock marked face, missing left earlobe burn scars creeping up out of his shirt.
Internal Journey: mildly dispassionate about the assignment, to hell bent on destruction
External Journey: situational monitor to direct personal violence
Motivation: to win
Wound: He was a POW and is very black and white about the ENEMY
Mission/Agenda: Disinformation
Secret: Is an addict
What makes them special? Access to the truth and the resources to conceal it at all costs
Traits: Direct to the point,
Subtext: Scratches at the burn scarring on his neck and chest
Flaw: He enjoys destruction of things and people’s lives
Values: Mission above all
Irony: He knows his career of destruction and lies has cost him personally, he struggles to justify what he does and the cost
What makes this the right character for this role? Saboteur, The burn scars are a result from a near escape sabotage mission.
Tell me about yourself. I’m not sure if you have the clearance but I have worked for multiple agencies over my career, correcting or cleaning up messes. I tighten up loose ends when state secrets begin to slip, weaving misinformation and discrediting whistleblowers.
Having to do with this journey, what are your strengths and weaknesses? No one in this story has the experience that I have, this is all I do. Everyone else in this story are amatuers, they don’t stand a chance. My weakness is, I never know if the mission is just. I struggle to justify in my own mind what I do when I ruin careers and lives sometimes even kill.
Why are you committed to making the Protagonist fail? Well hello, it’s the mission! Its not personal, it’s an assignment. Its not my place to judge right or wrong, just to execute the plan to keep information and noise to a minimum.
What do you get out of winning this fight / succeeding in your plan / taking down your competition? I love to win and accomplish the mission, maybe someday retirement although I have no life outside of this to retire too.
What drives you toward your mission / agenda, even in the face of danger, ruin, or death? To win at any cost, plus if I don’t accomplish the mission then I will become the mission for someone else to take out. So with any target, it’s me or them.
What secrets must you keep to succeed? What other secrets do you keep out of fear / insecurity? It’s not a matter of keeping secrets as much as make any truth that leaks out seem ridiculous and the whistleblower a laughingstock. The government and its contracted agencies are massive and are concealing so many huge secret in plain sight of the people.
Compared to other people like you, what makes you special? I have nothing to loose but what I know and have seen could flip perception of every average person upside down, if I lived long enough to convince them.
What do you think of <the Protagonist>? I don’t, to think of a target as anything other than a target is a mistake, a weakness. At time I do question what my superiors are really up too, do they have the full story of just a carefully chosen piece of it.
Tell me your side of this whole conflict / story. I’m here to dismantle anyone involved, kill if I have too. I can generate any credibility I need to destroy the credibility of anyone who gets in my way.
The Old Sargent
Role in the story: Supporting role
Age range and Description: 70’s, Old smoker, only living former internment camp guard
Internal Journey: Desperately struggling with the suppression of past deeds, finds peace in completing the missing pieces of the puzzle.
External Journey: Prison guard, witness to medical experiments in the secret camp, whistleblower
Motivation: to unburden his soul
Wound: He contributed to the death and cruelty as a foolish young man
Mission/Agenda: to connect the dots and confirm the facts as a witness
Secret: he knows where the secret camp was and how it was erased with the man made lake
What makes them special? The missing link and is murdered by the agent
Traits: harsh, loudly outspoken, quick to dismiss or shut others down
Subtext: his anger and regret towards himself, shows as anger towards others
Flaw: he feels that he has lived a lie, his whole persona is a front
Values: duty
Irony: the fulfillment of his duty long ago, stripped him of his internal ability to feel deserving of honor
What makes this the right character for this role? He is the last living eyewitness and in his twilight years is heavily burdened by it.
Tell me about yourself. I’m a proud veteran and I like to think a long-standing pillar of the community. I have served on the city council in the past and remain connected at the core. I
Why do you think you were called to this journey? Why you? I’ve been carrying this secret around for 50+ years, its getting really heavy. Also I’m old enough, I’ve lived my life the government has nothing left to hold over my head, they can’t take anything away from me at this point but I can regain some integrity.
You are up against <the Antagonist>. What is it about them that makes this journey even more difficult for you?I’m up against my own past more than anything, the mistakes I have made as a camp guard and helping to hide it all these years. The agent can threaten all he wants but nothing he can do can match the pain of my nightmares.
In order to survive or accomplish this, you are going to have to step way outside of your box. What changes do you expect to make and which of them will be the most difficult? I have to give up the lie that I have lived that I call a life, I have to let this town know the horror that resides underneath the lake and the ugly legacy that has been hidden from them.
What habits or ways of thinking do you think will be the most difficult to let go of?
My pride, habits? All the ways I justify that I did my duty, that I was just following orders
What fears, insecurities and wounds have held you back?
The screams, I can still hear the children crying and parents screaming over the dead children. Knowing that they were being injected with something that would make them suffer and die. I kept them from escaping that fate.
What skills, background or expertise makes you well-suited to face this conflict or antagonist? My military training of course, to hold the line and await orders. I just don’t know who my commanding officer should be at this stage in my life.
What are you hiding from the other characters? What don’t you want them to know? The truth damnit, that the camp and the experiments were real. Operation paperclip operated right here!
What do you think of <the Antagonist>? He’s a bit a of a bookworm but I guess he means well, he just doesn’t know what he is stepping into. He’s better off not knowing the truth.
Tell me your side of this whole conflict / story. I was a guard at the prison, I saw it all with my own eyes. Keeping it a secret has allowed this small town to just be that, just another small town in America. If I take the lid off of this there is no telling what will happen to the town, the jobs, the university….even me! People have no idea what really went on, how ugly it was watching people die slowly of diseases that were engineered with imported Nazi scientists.
What does it do for your life is you succeed here? I’m not sure what success is for me, I have lived my life but always under the shadow of my past. I can’t decide what is the right path, I have spent my life following orders even after I left the military.
Minor Roles:
Girls Father
The University Chancellor
News Broadcaster
Local Police Officers
Librarian
Background characters:
Prison Guards
Prison Physicians
Prisoners
Billy Bob Backhoe
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Charles Ferrell’s Character Profiles 2
What I learned by doing this assignment is to question the characters about their role in the story.
Genre Action / Drama
Duncan Smalls
Role in the story: Protagonist / Explorer / phd candidate, university teaching assistant
Age and description: 30, socially withdrawn and obsessed with history
Internal Journey: Withdrawn, loaner struggling for acceptance to center of public attention and potential leader.
External Journey: Mediocre history teacher a virtual unknown, to history maker who unearths what has been under everyone’s feet.
Motivation: Initially to quiet the voices, eventually to reveal the hidden tragic history.
Wound: painfully shy, abhors conflict and violence
Mission/Agenda: avenge the victims by revealing the tragedy
Secret: He was the little Asian girl
What makes them special? He is the only one who sees the ghosts and/or visions.
Traits: Organized to a fault, all things must be in place
Subtext: repeats himself
Flaw: Shuts down, disengages when challenged, narrow focus on himself
Values: Facts over beliefs, Integrity
Irony: His view of the world is driven on facts and evidence established over time, he is about to be confronted with the world of belief & the supernatural which cannot be proven.
What makes this the right character for this role? He lives a contained life, one comprised of safe calculated moves. His coming experience in the story forces him to believe, to step out of planned safe moves into risking all for others.
Ghost of the little girl
Role in the story: Antagonist / Change Agent
Age range and Description: 8 to 10, apparition of a small Japanese American girl
Internal Journey: from innocent believer in freedom, to victim of racial hatred
External Journey: American girl to unjustly imprisoned victim of medical experiments
Motivation: Vengeance and Recognition
Wound: She was murdered in the camp along with her family
Mission/Agenda: to get the world to listen
Secret: her and her family’s deaths along with the camp were wiped from all records, their suffering has been kept secret
What makes them special? As a ghost she can appear anywhere, even in the dreams of the living
Traits: elusive, persistent, methodical
Subtext: responds with escalation and anger
Flaw: Blindly driven by her victim status
Values: injustice should have no place to hide
Irony: looks innocent and was killed at a young age but has the experience of humankinds potential for cruelty driven by hatred & fear.
What makes this the right character for this role? She is the only one who possesses the hidden knowledge along with the desire for reveal and cannot be silenced any longer. She is also the previous incarnation of the main character.
The Old Sargent
Role in the story: Reluctant Protagonist
Age range and Description: 70’s, Old smoker, only living former internment camp guard
Internal Journey: Desperately struggling with the suppression of past deeds, finds peace in completing the missing pieces of the puzzle.
External Journey: Prison guard, witness to medical experiments in the secret camp, whistleblower
Motivation: to unburden his soul
Wound: He contributed to the death and cruelty as a foolish young man
Mission/Agenda: to connect the dots and confirm the facts as a witness
Secret: he knows where the secret camp was and how it was erased with the man made lake
What makes them special? The missing link and is murdered by the agent
Traits: harsh, loudly outspoken, quick to dismiss or shut others down
Subtext: his anger and regret towards himself, shows as anger towards others
Flaw: he feels that he has lived a lie, his whole persona is a front
Values: duty
Irony: the fulfillment of his duty long ago, stripped him of his internal ability to feel deserving of honor
What makes this the right character for this role? He is the last living eyewitness and in his twilight years is heavily burdened by it.
The Agent
Role in the story: Antagonist / Villain
Age range and Description: 50’s / pock marked face, missing left earlobe burn scars creeping up out of his shirt.
Internal Journey: mildly dispassionate about the assignment, to hell bent on destruction
External Journey: situational monitor to direct personal violence
Motivation: to win
Wound: He was a POW and is very black and white about the ENEMY
Mission/Agenda: Disinformation
Secret: Is an addict
What makes them special? Access to the truth and the resources to conceal it at all costs
Traits: Direct to the point,
Subtext: Scratches at the burn scarring on his neck and chest
Flaw: He enjoys destruction of things and people’s lives
Values: Mission above all
Irony: He knows his career of destruction and lies has cost him personally, he struggles to justify what he does and the cost
What makes this the right character for this role? Saboteur, The burn scars are a result from a near escape sabotage mission.
Minor Roles:
Girls Father
The University Chancellor
News Broadcaster
Local Police Officers
Librarian
Background characters:
Prison Guards
Prison Physicians
Prisoners
Billy Bob Backhoe
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Charles Ferrell’s, Character Profiles 1
What I learned by doing this assignment is to look for the arc in all characters.
Genre Action / Drama
Duncan Smalls
Role in the story: Protagonist / Explorer / phd candidate, university teaching assistant
Age and description: 30, socially withdrawn and obsessed with history
Internal Journey: Withdrawn, loaner struggling for acceptance to center of public attention and potential leader.
External Journey: Mediocre history teacher a virtual unknown, to history maker who unearths what has been under everyone’s feet.
Motivation: Initially to quiet the voices, eventually to reveal the hidden tragic history.
Wound: painfully shy, abhors conflict and violence
Mission/Agenda: avenge the victims by revealing the tragedy
Secret: He was the little Asian girl
What makes them special? He is the only one who sees the ghosts and/or visions.
Ghost of the little girl
Role in the story: Protagonist / Change Agent
Age range and Description: 8 to 10, apparition of a small Japanese American girl
Internal Journey: from innocent believer in freedom, to victim of racial hatred
External Journey: American girl to unjustly imprisoned victim of medical experiments
Motivation: Vengeance
Wound: She was murdered in the camp along with her family
Mission/Agenda: to get the world to listen
Secret: her and her family’s deaths along with the camp were wiped from all records
What makes them special? As a ghost she can appear anywhere, even in the dreams of the living
The Old Sargent
Role in the story: Antagonist turns Protagonist
Age range and Description: 70’s, Old smoker, only living former internment camp guard
Internal Journey: Desperately struggling with the suppression of past deeds, finds peace in completing the missing pieces of the puzzle.
External Journey: Prison guard, witness to medical experiments in the secret camp, whistleblower
Motivation: to unburden his soul
Wound: He contributed to the death and cruelty as a foolish young man
Mission/Agenda: to connect the dots and confirm the facts as a witness
Secret: he knows where the secret camp was and how it was erased with the man made lake
What makes them special? The missing link and is murdered by the agent
The Agent
Role in the story: Antagonist / Villain
Age range and Description: 50’s / pock marked face, missing left earlobe burn scars creeping up out of his shirt.
Internal Journey: mildly dispassionate about the assignment, to hell bent on destruction
External Journey: situational monitor to direct personal violence
Motivation: to win
Wound: He was a POW and is very black and white about the ENEMY
Mission/Agenda: Disinformation
Secret: Is an addict
What makes them special? Access to the truth and resources to conceal it at all costs
Minor Roles:
Girls Father
The University Chancellor
News Broadcaster
Local Police Officers
Librarian
Background characters:
Prison Guards
Prison Physicians
Prisoners
Billy Bob Backhoe
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Charles Ferrell’s transformational journey
What I learned doing this assignment is that character arc is the most basic tenet of characters and viewer’s journey.
Duncan Smalls Character Arc
Duncan Smalls is an aspiring history professor, recent masters graduate at a local university who engages more with past than his own present. Books are his constant companion until the distant past engages him.
Internal Journey: Withdrawn, loaner struggling for acceptance to center of public attention and potential leader.
External Journey: Mediocre history teacher a virtual unknown, to history maker who unearths what has been under everyone’s feet.
What are the Old Ways? Unheard and willing to accept a life of “less than”
What are the New Ways? Unstoppable in his search, willing to risk all.
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Charles Ferrell
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Charles Ferrell’s Level 2 Horror Emotions
What I learned doing this assignment was to gain an insight into the hierarchy of horror emotions and their ties to acts.
INT. CARGOSHIP/HOLD STAIRWELL DUSK
Fear: They run inside another hatch, onto a metal stairwell that leads down.
Suspense: Bullets follow only to ricochet inside the hatch forcing them to go lower into the cargo hold of the ship away from the hatch, away from familiar territory. Do they chance and run out or wait and see.
Dread: The hatch is suddenly shut and locked from the outside; they try the hatch with no avail. Blood is on the inside of the hatch. They must find another way out.
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Charles Ferrell’s Level 1 Horror Emotion Scene
What I learned doing this assignment is concept of base horror emotions versus escalated states.
EXT. BOAT/ALONGSIDE SHIP
The group nears the area of the cargo ship to fish in the schooling group of fish that were spotted.
Apprehension: It doesn’t make sense why dolphin would be so active near a cargo ship, something is not right here.
Surprise: They discover that the schooling fish are shark. Down below the surface they can faintly see a feeding frenzy.
Shock: A young crew member appears in the entry porthole above the water line, waving his hands and seems to have blood on him.
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Charles Ferrell’s Outline
What I learned from this assignment is that my Act 2 and number of scenes need to increase.
Outline
ACT 1
Setup
Security camera footage of killings in the city alley ways and city street, footage of bodies being tossed over the side of cargo ship, literal blood in the water and on the side of the ship.
EXT. MARINA DAYTIME
The group is walking down the dock to the rental boat, carrying their gear. Jimmy after finishing paperwork, is far behind. Talking to an older man with a cigar in his mouth, while walking past the fuel pumps.
Old fisherman recommends fishing 24 miles out near the oil rigs.
EXT. BOAT DAYTIME
The throaty engine roars to life as bow of the boat lifts while picking up speed, the cabin cruiser heads out to sea. Eric holds onto a railing and makes his way up to the fly bridge above, is piloting.
News flash alerting to a serial killer comes on the radio, jimmy ignores and quickly changes the station.
Eric is annoyed and Jimmy alludes to that Eric needs to
EXT. BOAT/OIL RIG LATER
The group is flagged down by an anchored cargo ship crewman, he looks to be desperate and blood on his arm. Cry for help freeing a badly injured crew member
EXT. CARGOSHIP LATE AFTERNOON
Group of friends boards the anchored cargo ship to help
Back lit by the blazing sun a single silhouette can be seen in the bridge, high above the deck.
They spot the injured and run the length of the ship only to find a body that has been dead for days.
momentary tension/dissention erupts within the group, are we fools? Are we heroes too late? Or is something greater afoot?
The group decides loosely this is a misunderstanding and youthful panic on the part of the crew member who can now not be found. Choose to return to their fishing trip and lives.
They walk back to where they last spotted the crew member, only to hear their boat pulling away.
They run back towards the hatch which leads to the stairwells to the waterline porthole. Only to be shot at from on high near the bridge.
INT. CARGOSHIP/HOLD LATE AFTERNOON
Hide They run inside another hatch. Bullets follow only to ricochet inside the hatch forcing them to go lower into the cargo hold of the ship away from the hatch, away from familiar territory.
The hatch is suddenly shut and locked from the outside; they try the hatch with no avail. Blood is on the inside of the hatch. They must find another way out.
Deeper into the belly of the beast, searching for a way. This is no accident and the desire to trap them is becoming apparent, with no known motive or map for survival.
A metal hatch door is heard squeaking in the distant darkness, footsteps high above are heard slowly walking on a catwalk.
Wondering in poorly lit conditions, sparsely spaced swinging overhead lights above a massive arena of cargo containers, with overhead catwalks creaking with the waves.
They split up to seek anything in the cargo that could be used as a weapon or find a way out.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Armed with what amounts to damaged cargo (weapons, tools, furniture) they search separately for a way out between the cargo containers blocking visibility to each other.
INT. CARGOSHIP/HALLWAY – NIGHT
Jimmy armed with a pipe wrench, climbs to a higher level sees a figure dart by a door and pursues
Jimmy is ambushed and in his final moments partially glimpses the monster’s warped reflection in a metal door.
He alone pursues, is ambushed from behind is killed and in his final moments catches a glimpse of a female silhouette watching from a distance.
Jimmy the assumed leader of group, tough and/or brave is removed from the equation. He leaves the others alone and dies, creating the necessity for the others discover a new leader and arc.
He chases his first impulse to act, causing him to get blindsided and stabbed in the back by another.
MIDPOINT
INT. CARGOSHIP/HOLD NIGHT
Hearing the echoed screams, they begin to call out locating each other (jimmy is missing). Creaking catwalk steps above in the darkness, jimmy’s body swings from the darkness above in their midst. His feet wrapped in chain, a bloody pendulum.
They scatter like roaches, hiding separately between cargo containers.
Above in broken light as shadows move, they catch a partial glimpse of the monster, enjoying their suffering. The vantage point from where Jimmy’s body came down. As the body swings back up the blood spatter hits the monster unflinching, like a soft welcomed rain.
Crouching the darkness separately, they can partially see Jimmy’s body swing as Chris starts to break down.
Chris mentally breaks down and is frozen, Eric tries to calm him and refocus his energy on survival and that Chris is too cautious to get caught in a trap.
The monster covered in fine blood spatter, jumps onto the chain with the swinging Jimmy’s body. Forcing the chain to swing in an ever wider arch, crossing thru small silvers of light in its path. The blood is now causing makeup to run beginning to expose some of the tattoos and scarring.
ACT 3
Impending Doom The monster lets out a shrill scream, suddenly the sound of metal-on-metal scraping of weapons on the containers, banging on others. Loud hurried footsteps across the tops of the containers coming closer. Building to what sound like a small army of steps and in the echoing dark it seems to be from all directions.
Hide some characters fumble in the dark for a means of defense, while others cower further into the darkness in fear.
The ship begins to move, while listing to one side as an anchor point pulls against it. Cargo Containers begin groan and creak, cargo securing chains begin to snap one by one, sending containers sliding and spilling. As the whole area tilts.
Forcing the group to run, climb to avoid being crushed, pick any direction just one together if possible
INT. CARGOSHIP/HALLWAY NIGHT
Eric enters hallway off the cargo bay, is confronted with armed teen who is slightly hesitant to kill. He hears more frantic footsteps and yelling coming.
Eric tries to reason with the youth, while waiting for Chris sprinkled with a misting of Jimmy’s blood and frozen in the shadows is unable to act.
Chris gathers himself and leaps, taking down the attacker
The youth beg for his life and promises to help if they will save his sister
Impending doom Bullets fly down the metal hallways, the group must decide and move.
The group is now + 2 as they pick up the hiding child aurie and her brother. No chance of out running, they duck inside a boiler room.
Several youths spilt off to explore the boiler room.
INT. CARGOSHIP/BOILERROOM NIGHT
Eric now protecting Aurie, along with the youth and Chris fight using any means they find. The youth is injured, one pursuer is killed the other badly injured calls the troops.
Eric with the guidance of the youth begins a long ladder climb up to a deck hatch, injured youth and chris (afraid of heights) behind him, with aurie climbing reluctantly between him and the ladder.
In the climb the are confronted with urgency, Chris’ fear of heights, an injured youth and the further physical challenges of a physically smaller and immature child in a mature situation.
The group makes it topside to the deck, locking the hatch behind them, only to discover the real danger, the real killer in waiting.
Weary of the ineffective young killers the monster directly pursues
The monster wiping blood from her eyes exposes her true face
Chris seeing escape for all not possible, arcs from coward to hero and faces the monster alone. While Eric escapes with Aurie and her injured brother.
Chris is afraid of everything and in the end faces his demons and the monster for the good of all.
In direct battle with the monster, in this the monsters true appearance is revealed. Chris appears to be winning then is attacked from behind by a second attacker bringing him to his knees before the monster & his demons, before his throat is slit.
A shot rings out of nowhere as the monster’s blood flies and she falls out of sight. Below the fishermen has come at the sight of the sinking ship and is firing. All in battle seem lost and survivors are safe.
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Charles Ferrell’s Character Track
What I learned from this assignment is the balance and or imbalance that needs to be created in the different character facets.
Jimmy
A. What is their Character Profile?
Role: Rebel / Rule BreakerTraits: little arrogant, not a great listenerFears: afraid of being irrelevant, at any costWants/Needs: to be validated by being followed and thus chooses his friendsLikability / Rooting factors: Fun to be around, instigatorHow they react under stress: Angry, annoyed at the disruption of his plansRelationship with other characters: Friendly, tries to help in a misguided way but is in general a superficial person.
B. What is their Character Journey for this story?
Character Intro: Piloting the boat somewhat recklessly for his own enjoyment, mostly ignoring his friends’ thoughts feelings and assumes he has the answers.Denial: Is annoyed by being made a fool of, lashes outTheir reaction at first horror: Considers it a hoax, some type of prankRelation to group after first horror: separated emotionally by his lack of caution and dismissal of others concernHow they fight back: headfirst without much considerationEnd Point: the first to die and turned on his head literallyWhat insight do their deaths or survival bring to the others/audience? This is no game, toughness, brashness will not prevail. Bravado will be turned on its head and drained of all that it is.
Eric
A. What is their Character Profile?
Role: LeaderTraits: PracticalFears:Wants/Needs:Likability / Rooting factors:How they react under stress:Relationship with other characters:
B. What is their Character Journey for this story?
Character Intro:Denial:Their reaction at first horror: reason, logicRelation to group after first horror: assumes lead after 1<sup>st</sup> character deathHow they fight back: Outsmart, runEnd Point:What insight do their deaths or survival bring to the others/audience? Survival is first about the obvious leader isn’t always a leader at all.
Chris
A. What is their Character Profile?
Role: Sacrificial lambTraits:Fears: Heights, spiders,Wants/Needs: Stability and predictability, adverse to changeLikability / Rooting factors: How they react under stress: panic, shut downRelationship with other characters:
B. What is their Character Journey for this story?
Character Intro: opening sceneDenial:Their reaction at first horror: shaken, rattled begins to be obnoxiousRelation to group after first horror: full hysteria after 1<sup>st</sup> character killingHow they fight back: kamikazeEnd Point: dieWhat insight do their deaths or survival bring to the others/audience? It is possible to change and change drastically when the situation presents itself.
Fisherman
A. What is their Character Profile?
Role: RescuerTraits: Former cigar smoker, still carries. Fears:Wants/Needs: to be helpfulLikability / Rooting factors: How they react under stress: jumps to actionRelationship with other characters: off chance meeting, simple one-time acquaintance
B. What is their Character Journey for this story?
Character Intro: Chance meeting at the marina, experienced boat owner that knows the area and his boat well.Denial:Their reaction at first horror: Steps up in crisis to help othersRelation to group after first horror:How they fight back:End Point: N/AWhat insight do their deaths or survival bring to the others/audience? N/A
Nikki
A. What is their Character Profile?
Role: Abrasive, resistant to followTraits: quick to say no, argumentative before saying yes, a plannerFears: secretly that her choices are wrong and spidersWants/Needs: to be in control, agency in all decisionsLikability / Rooting factors: How they react under stress: rejects the reality that it could be happening to her, angryRelationship with other characters: Dating Chris who allows her to control most of the relationship decisions so far. Considering breaking up with him due his fears and not standing up for himself.
B. What is their Character Journey for this story?
Character Intro: Chance meeting at the marina, experienced boat owner that knows the area and his boat well.Denial: everyone else is wrong for believingTheir reaction at first horror: Steps up in crisis to help othersRelation to group after first horror:How they fight back:End Point: N/A
What insight do their deaths or survival bring to the others/audience?
Reamus
A. What is their Character Profile?
Role: Traits: follower, impressionable and Fears:Wants/Needs: wants to be acceptedLikability / Rooting factors: a kid with an unfortunate childhood caught in a trapHow they react under stress: foldRelationship with other characters: switch sides to help them
B. What is their Character Journey for this story?
Character Intro: face to face battle with EricDenial:Their reaction at first horror: change sidesRelation to group after first horror: How they fight back: run, helpEnd Point:
What insight do their deaths or survival bring to the others/audience? Survival
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Charles Ferrell’s Monster Reveal Track
What I learned from doing this assignment is I need more characters earlier, more scenes and more monster complexity to clue in.
A. Who or what the is the monster?
What are its powers?
Manipulation, Surprise, Shock, extreme emotional torture via choice.
What are its limitations?
Physical Strength
What are its weaknesses?
Prefers to involve others in the killing, not always reliable
What is its Plan/Purpose/Appetite?
Her twin disappeared when she was young, she has strong drive for the rest of world to feel terrified, unsafe, and as if part of them is missing. Couples or pairs of friends must choose to lose a limb or lose their partner, either way part of them will be missing. Misery is her playground, taking her back to the childish origin of her psychotic break.
B. Reveal Sequence
ACT 1
Atmosphere of Evil established: Security camera footage of killings in the street, bodies being tossed over the side of cargo ship, literal blood in the water and on the side if the ship
Horror Situation: Helping a good person and being attacked Cry for help freeing a badly injured crew member
Reaction – Try to solve it: Group of friends boards the anchored cargo ship to help
Monster Reveal: Back lit by the blazing sun a single silhouette can be seen in the bridge, high above the deck.
Horror Situation: Tricked They spot the injured and run the length of the ship only to find a body that has been dead for days.
Connect with the characters: momentary inner tension/dissention erupts within the group, are we fools? Are we heroes too late? Or is something greater afoot?
Denial of Horror: The groups decide loosely this is a misunderstanding and youthful panic on the part of the crew member who can now not be found. Choose to return to their fishing trip and lives.
Safety taken away: They walk back to where they last spotted the crew member, only to hear their boat pulling away.
Horror Situation: Trapped They run back towards the hatch which leads to the stairwells to the waterline porthole. Only to be shot at from on high near the bridge
Reaction – Hide They run inside another hatch. Bullets follow only to ricochet inside the hatch forcing them to go lower into the cargo hold of the ship away from the hatch, away from familiar territory.
Horror Situation: Escape route taken away. The hatch is suddenly shut and locked from the outside; they try the hatch with no avail. They must find another way out.
Reaction – Escape: They must find another way out, deeper into the belly of the beast.
Monster: The nature of the beast: This is no accident and the desire to trap them is becoming apparent, with no known motive or map for survival.
Monster Reveal: A metal hatch door is heard squeaking in the darkness, footsteps high above are heard slowly walking on a catwalk.
Horror Situation: Lost Wondering in poorly lit conditions of spilled cargo, finding more blood and evidence of the fate of the crew.
Reaction: Fight They split up to seek anything in the cargo that could be used as a weapon or way out.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Armed with what amounts to damaged cargo (weapons, tools, furniture) they search separately for a way out between the cargo containers blocking visibility to each other.
CHARACTER DEATH 1: Jimmy
Horror Situation: Being lured into danger. Jimmy armed with a pipe wrench, climbs to a higher level sees a figure dart by a door and pursues
Monster Reveal: Jimmy is ambushed and in his final moments partially glimpses the monster.
Reaction: Fight. He alone pursues, is ambushed from behind is killed and in his final moments catches a glimpse of a female silhouette watching from a distance.
WHY: Jimmy the assumed leader of group, tough and/or brave is removed from the equation. He leaves the others alone and dies, creating the necessity for the others discover a new leader and arc.
HOW: He chases his first impulse to act, causing him to get blindsided and stabbed in the back by another. His body is tossed down upon them, dividing them literally and emotionally.
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought
Horror Situation: Fall through the floor\ horror from above. Hearing the echoed screams, they begin to call out locating each other (jimmy is missing). Creaking catwalk steps above in the darkness, jimmy’s body swings from the darkness above in their midst. His feet wrapped in chain, a bloody pendulum.
Reaction: Hide They scatter like roaches, hiding separately between cargo containers.
Monster Reveal: Above in broken light as shadows move, they catch a partial glimpse of the monster; enjoying their suffering. The vantage point from where Jimmy’s body came down. As the body swings back up the blood spatter hits the monster unflinching, like a soft welcomed rain.
Horror Situation: Mentally Tortured Crouching the darkness separately, they can partially see Jimmy’s body swing as Chris starts to break down.
Reaction: Try to solve it. Chris mentally breaks down and is frozen, Eric tries to calm him and refocus his energy on survival and that Chris is too cautious to get caught in a trap.
Monster Reveal: The monster covered in fine blood spatter, jumps onto the chain with the swinging Jimmy’s body. Forcing the chain to swing in an ever wider arch, crossing thru small silvers of light in its path. The blood is now causing makeup to run beginning to expose some of the tattoos and scarring.
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Horror Situation: Impending Doom The monster lets out a shrill scream, suddenly the sound of metal-on-metal scraping of weapons on the containers; banging on others. Loud hurried footsteps across the tops of the containers coming closer. Building to what sound like a small army of steps and in the echoing dark it seems to be from all directions.
Reaction: Hide some characters fumble in the dark for a means of defensive, while others cower further into the darkness in fear.
Horror Situation: Environment changing around you The ship begins to move, while listing to one side as an anchor point pulls against it. Cargo Containers begin groan and creak, cargo securing chains begin to snap one by one, sending containers sliding and spilling. As the whole area tilts.
Reaction: Escape. Forcing the group to run, climb to avoid being crushed, pick any direction just one together
Horror Situation: A Character refuses to take action Eric enters hallway off of cargo bay, is confronted with armed teen who is slightly hesitant to kill. He hears more frantic footsteps and yelling coming.
Reaction: Try to solve it Eric tries to reason with the youth, while waiting for Chris sprinkled with a misting of Jimmy’s blood and frozen in the shadows is unable to act.
Horror Situation: Friends in Danger Chris gathers himself and leaps, taking down the attacker
Reaction: Escape The youth beg for his life and promises to help if they will save his sister
Horror Situation: Impending doom Bullets fly down the metal hallways, the group must decide and move.
Reaction: Hide The group is now + 2 as they pick up the hiding child aurie and her brother. No chance of out running, they duck inside a boiler room.
Horror Situation: Injured, wounded, or debilitated Several youths spilt off to explore the boiler room.
Reaction: Fight. Eric now protecting Aurie, along with the youth and Chris fight using any means they find. The youth is injured, one pursuer is killed the other badly injured calls the troops.
Horror Situation: Dilemma..who to save Eric with the guidance of the youth begins a long ladder climb up to a deck hatch, injured youth and chris (afraid of heights) behind him, with aurie climbing reluctantly between him and the ladder.
Reaction: Escape In the climb the are confronted with urgency, Chris’ fear of heights, an injured youth and the further physical challenges of a physically smaller and immature child in a mature situation.
The thrilling escape from death: The group makes it topside to the deck, locking the hatch behind them, only to discover the real danger, the real killer in waiting.
Horror Situation: Monster approaching Weary of the ineffective young killers the monster directly pursues
Monster Reveal: The monster wiping blood from her eyes exposes her true face
CHARACTER DEATH 2: CHRIS
Reaction: Fight & Escape Chris seeing escape for all not possible, arcs from coward to hero and faces the monster alone, Chris dies. While Eric escapes with Aurie and her injured brother.
WHY: Character arc, Chris is afraid of everything and in the end faces his demons and the monster for the good of all.
HOW: In direct battle with the monster, in this the monsters true appearance is revealed. Chris appears to be winning then is attacked from behind by a second attacker bringing him to his knees before the monster & his demons before his throat is slit.
Resolution: The injured youth joins the fight with Chris against the monster, Chris is visibly killed and all in battle seem lost and survivors are safe.
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Charles Ferrell’s Character Death Track
What I learned doing this assignment is I may need more cannon fodder.
ACT 1
Atmosphere of Evil established: Security camera footage of killings in the street, bodies being tossed over the side of cargo ship, literal blood in the water and on the side if the ship
Horror Situation: Helping a good person and being attacked Cry for help freeing a badly injured crew member
Reaction – Try to solve it: Group of friends boards the anchored cargo ship to help
Horror Situation: Tricked They spot the injured and run the length of the ship only to find a body that has been dead for days.
Connect with the characters: momentary inner tension/dissention erupts within the group, are we fools? Are we heroes too late? Or is something greater afoot?
Denial of Horror: The groups decide loosely this is a misunderstanding and youthful panic on the part of the crew member who can now not be found. Choose to return to their fishing trip and lives.
Safety taken away: They walk back to where they last spotted the crew member, only to hear their boat pulling away.
Horror Situation: Trapped They run back towards the hatch which leads to the stairwells to the waterline porthole. Only to be shot at from on high near the bridge
Reaction – Hide They run inside another hatch. Bullets follow only to ricochet inside the hatch forcing them to go lower into the cargo hold of the ship away from the hatch, away from familiar territory.
Horror Situation: Escape route taken away. The hatch is suddenly shut and locked from the outside, they try the hatch with no avail. They must find another way out.
Reaction – Escape: They must find another way out, deeper into the belly of the beast.
Monster: The nature of the beast: This is no accident and the desire to trap them is becoming apparent, with no known motive or map for survival.
Horror Situation: Lost Wondering in poorly lit conditions of spilled cargo, finding more blood and evidence of the fate of the crew.
Reaction: Fight They split up to seek anything in the cargo that could be used as a weapon or way out.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Armed with what amounts to damaged cargo (weapons, tools, furniture) they search separately for a way out between the cargo containers blocking visibility to each other.
CHARACTER DEATH 1: Jimmy
Horror Situation: Being lured into danger. Jimmy armed with a pipe wrench, climbs to a higher level sees a figure dart by a door and pursues
Reaction: Fight. He alone pursues, is ambushed from behind is killed and in his final moments catches a glimpse of a female silhouette watching from a distance.
WHY: Jimmy the assumed leader of group, tough and/or brave is removed from the equation. He leaves the others alone and dies, creating the necessity for the others discover a new leader and arc.
HOW: He chases his first impulse to act, causing him to get blindsided and stabbed in the back by another. His body is tossed down upon them, dividing them literally and emotionally.
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought
Horror Situation: Fall through the floor\ horror from above. Hearing the echoed screams, they begin to call out locating each other (jimmy is missing). Creaking catwalk steps above in the darkness, jimmy’s body falls from the darkness above in their midst.
Reaction: Hide They scatter like roaches, hiding separately between cargo containers.
Horror Situation: Mentally Tortured Crouching the darkness separately, they can partially see Jimmy’s body as Chris starts to break down.
Reaction: Try to solve it. Chris mentally breaks down and is frozen, Eric tries to calm him and refocus his energy on survival and that Chris is too cautious to get caught in a trap.
Horror Situation: Environment changing around you The ship begins to move, while listing to one side as an anchor point pulls against it. Cargo Containers begin to slide
Reaction: Escape. Forcing the group to run, avoid being crushed, pick any direction just one together
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Horror Situation: A Character refuses to take action Eric enters hallway off of cargo bay, is confronted with armed teen who is slightly hesitant to kill. He hears more frantic footsteps and yelling coming.
Reaction: Try to solve it Eric tries to reason with the youth, while waiting for Chris frozen in the shadows to act.
Horror Situation: Friends in Danger Chris gathers himself and leaps taking down the attacker
Reaction: Escape The youth beg for his life and promises to help if they will save his sister
Horror Situation: Impending doom Bullets fly down the metal hallways, the group must decide and move.
Reaction: Hide The group is now + 2 as they pick up the hiding child aurie and her brother. No chance of out running, they duck inside a boiler room.
Horror Situation: Injured, wounded, or debilitated Several youths spilt off to explore the boiler room.
Reaction: Fight. Eric now protecting Aurie, along with the youth and Chris fight using any means they find. The youth is injured, one pursuer is killed the other badly injured calls the troops.
Horror Situation: Dilemma..who to save Eric with the guidance of the youth begins a long ladder climb up to a deck hatch, injured youth and chris (afraid of heights) behind him, with aurie climbing reluctantly between him and the ladder.
Reaction: Escape In the climb the are confronted with urgency, Chris’ fear of heights, an injured youth and the further physical challenges of a physically smaller and immature child in a mature situation.
The thrilling escape from death: The group makes it topside to the deck, locking the hatch behind them, only to discover the real danger, the real killer in waiting.
Horror Situation: Monster approaching Weary of the ineffective young killers the monster directly pursues
CHARACTER DEATH 2: CHRIS
Reaction: Fight & Escape Chris seeing escape for all not possible, arcs from coward to hero and faces the monster alone, Chris dies. While Eric escapes with Aurie and her injured brother.
WHY: Character arc, Chris is afraid of everything and in the end faces his demons and the monster for the good of all.
HOW: In direct battle with the monster, in this the monsters true appearance is revealed. Chris appears to be winning then is attacked from behind by a second attacker bringing him to his knees before the monster & his demons before his throat is slit.
Resolution: The injured youth joins the fight with Chris against the monster, Chris is visibly killed and all in battle seem lost and survivors are safe.
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Charles Ferrell’s Horror Situation Track
What I learned from doing this assignment is getting a feel for building the flow of one situation, evolving or falling into another.
ACT 1
Atmosphere of Evil established: Security camera footage of killings in the street, bodies being tossed over the side of cargo ship, literal blood in the water and on the side if the ship
Horror Situation: Helping a good person and being attacked Cry for help freeing a badly injured crew member
Reaction – Try to solve it: Group of friends boards the anchored cargo ship to help
Horror Situation: Tricked They spot the injured and run the length of the ship only to find a body that has been dead for days.
Connect with the characters: momentary inner tension/dissention erupts within the group, are we fools? Are we heroes too late? Or is something greater afoot?
Denial of Horror: The groups decide loosely this is a misunderstanding and youthful panic on the part of the crew member who can now not be found. Choose to return to their fishing trip and lives.
Safety taken away: They walk back to where they last spotted the crew member, only to hear their boat pulling away.
Horror Situation: Trapped They run back towards the hatch which leads to the stairwells to the waterline porthole. Only to be shot at from on high near the bridge
Reaction – Hide They run inside another hatch. Bullets follow only to ricochet inside the hatch forcing them to go lower into the cargo hold of the ship away from the hatch, away from familiar territory.
Horror Situation: Escape route taken away. The hatch is suddenly shut and locked from the outside, they try the hatch with no avail. They must find another way out.
Reaction – Escape: They must find another way out, deeper into the belly of the beast.
Monster: The nature of the beast: This is no accident and the desire to trap them is becoming apparent, with no known motive or map for survival.
Horror Situation: Lost Wondering in poorly lit conditions of spilled cargo, finding more blood and evidence of the fate of the crew.
Reaction: Fight They split up to seek anything in the cargo that could be used as a weapon or way out.
ACT 2 — THE POINT OF NO RETURN
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted: Armed with what amounts to damaged cargo (weapons, tools, furniture) they search separately for a way out between the cargo containers blocking visibility to each other.
Horror Situation: Being lured into danger. Jimmy armed with a pipe wrench, climbs to a higher level sees a figure dart by a door and pursues
Reaction: Fight. He alone pursues, is ambushed from behind is killed and in his final moments catches a glimpse of a female silhouette watching from a distance.
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought
Horror Situation: Fall through the floor\ horror from above. Hearing the echoed screams, they begin to call out locating each other (jimmy is missing). Creaking catwalk steps above in the darkness, jimmy’s body falls from the darkness above in their midst.
Reaction: Hide They scatter like roaches, hiding separately between cargo containers.
Horror Situation: Mentally Tortured Crouching the darkness separately, they can partially see Jimmy’s body as Chris starts to break down.
Reaction: Try to solve it. Chris mentally breaks down and is frozen, Eric tries to calm him and refocus his energy on survival and that Chris is too cautious to get caught in a trap.
Horror Situation: Environment changing around you The ship begins to move, while listing to one side as an anchor point pulls against it. Cargo Containers begin to slide
Reaction: Escape. Forcing the group to run, avoid being crushed, pick any direction just one together
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Horror Situation: A Character refuses to take action Eric enters hallway off of cargo bay, is confronted with armed teen who is slightly hesitant to kill. He hears more frantic footsteps and yelling coming.
Reaction: Try to solve it Eric tries to reason with the youth, while waiting for Chris frozen in the shadows to act.
Horror Situation: Friends in Danger Chris gathers himself and leaps taking down the attacker
Reaction: Escape The youth beg for his life and promises to help if they will save his sister
Horror Situation: Impending doom Bullets fly down the metal hallways, the group must decide and move.
Reaction: Hide The group is now + 2 as they pick up the hiding child aurie and her brother. No chance of out running, they duck inside a boiler room.
Horror Situation: Injured, wounded, or debilitated Several youths spilt off to explore the boiler room.
Reaction: Fight. Eric now protecting Aurie, along with the youth and Chris fight using any means they find. The youth is injured, one pursuer is killed the other badly injured calls the troops.
Horror Situation: Dilemma..who to save Eric with the guidance of the youth begins a long ladder climb up to a deck hatch, injured youth and chris (afraid of heights) behind him, with aurie climbing reluctantly between him and the ladder.
Reaction: Escape In the climb the are confronted with urgency, Chris’ fear of heights, an injured youth and the further physical challenges of a physically smaller and immature child in a mature situation.
The thrilling escape from death: The group makes it topside to the deck, locking the hatch behind them, only to discover the real danger, the real killer in waiting.
Horror Situation: Monster approaching Weary of the ineffective young killers the monster directly pursues
Reaction: Fight & Escape Chris seeing escape for all not possible, arcs from coward to hero and faces the monster alone, Chris dies. While Eric escapes with Aurie and her injured brother.
Resolution: The injured youth joins the fight with Chris against the monster, Chris is visibly killed and all seem lost and survivors are safe.
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Charles Ferrell’s Horror Plot
What I learned doing this assignment is some of the rhythm hidden within plot that is not so random.
Act 1 – Set Up for Horror
Atmosphere of Evil established – emergency radio announcement of active serial killer
Connect with the characters – character names, connections amongst them, personalities and tension are revealed through interactions.
The characters are warned not to do it. – radio broadcast warning and tension within the group, literal blood in the water near the ship ignored.
Denial of Horror – ignored public warning, denial of odd circumstances surrounding the cargo ship and its largely missing crew.
Safety taken away – beyond cell connectivity, lost within an enormous ship, out to sea in international waters
Monster: The nature of the beast – slowly clues and evidence of demise of previous victims are discovered.
Act 2 – The Point Of No Return
Isolated / Trapped / Abducted – Boat which is the only means of escape is lost, trapped and pursued inside a giant maze of a ship.
One of us killed – Jimmy the group leader and risk taker is killed
MIDPOINT: The monster is worse than we thought
Full pursuit by the killer – Weary of the runaways inadequate killing skills Scribbles directly engages in the fight, due to violent contact, sweat her makeup gives way along with her desire to maintain a façade and the monster is revealed.
Terrorized – the full chase ensues, amid spilled cargo, giant containers shifting with the ship moving and listing to one side.
ACT 3 – FULL OUT HORROR
Fight to the death – Eric is able to turn one runaway,
Hysteria – ship has struck an oil rig and is taking on water, with a killer engaged they fight death from two fronts drowning or murder.
The thrilling escape from death: Eric and aurie make their way top side and begin to climb across cargo and up the oil rig off of the ship. The crew of the oil rig has assembled above and begins efforts to help.
Death returns to take one or more. Chris close behind Eric, turns the face the monster head on, giving Eric and Aurie a chance and dies before their eyes as the ships sinks
Resolution eric and aurie make it to safety, the ship sinks and apparently the monster with it. Leaving eric with a irony of being the sole survivor of his friends, the one who has a reason to die now has a reason to live.
Final scene is partial sunlight inside a shipping container, striking the tattooed head of the monster and the door quickly closes on the container. Camera pans out to a moving cargo ship headed out to sea.
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Charles Ferrell’s Characters for Horror
What I learned from doing this assignment is the potential complexity of weighing needed roles or gaps in story structure, against simply building quality and interesting characters to take us along for the ride.
1 Group:
Social group of friends out for a weekend long fishing trip to reconnect and cheer up one of the friends after a recent tragic loss.
Second group of outsiders, runaways that have joined forces with our monster forming a rag tag gang of inexperienced human weapons.
One remaining member of a professional team, the only surviving member of the murdered cargo ship crew.
2. Dying Pattern: B
3. Characters
Lead: Jimmy always gets what he wants in life, appears to have it all together while working hard to hide his demons/weakness. Has a history of taking other along for the ride in his bad decisions.
Rescuer: Eric Recently lost his pregnant wife in an auto accident, his one and only love, somewhat reserved and always cautious.
Out of Control: Reamus overly eager to a point of fault, he desperately wants seeks acceptance, misguided in his desperation lacks conviction in word and actions.
Innocent: Aurie Confused, looking for parental figures, needing a sense of belonging in her young life of turmoil and abandonment, inwardly searching for a focus for her loyalties.
Introvert/loner: Chaesy deckhand and aspiring helmsman, often left out of crew group activities.
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Charles Ferrell’s Terrifying Monster
What I learned from doing this assignment is the large gap between horror portrayal’s of psychopaths and their actual methods and psychopathology.
1. Who and what my monster is:
Scribbles: a hairless, tattooed and heavily scarred female psychopathic killer
Her father abused and eventually murdered her mother in front of her. He would keep her in a storage container when he would go out. After losing his job at the docks, he tried learning to be a tattooist. Without art skills he would tie her up as a little girl, practicing on her as she struggled. This resulted in her body being covered in squiggly lines, scars from incorrect technique and bondage. He routinely told her “if you are going to be a hairless freak, you might as well be my little scribbles”
2. Their Terror:
A deadly maze comprised of Shipping containers within an abandoned offshore cargo ship, along with her crew of addict runaways. Her killing method of choice is manipulating young runaways into killers, using various weapons and tools from the cargo.
3. Their Mystery:
The characters must realize that she is the monster behind the mayhem and that the young killers have been manipulated into believing lies about the them, some maybe overpowered, some talked down, and some want to kill. The characters must piece together the lies, in some cases, overcome their own demons to fight or kill a child for survival. Can your limbs and your humanity remain intact?
4. Their Fear-Provoking Appearance:
100% of her body is covered is covered in tattoos of squiggly lines, while suffering from alopecia, in addition to rope scarring around her wrists, bite marks scarring about her body. The monster hides in plain sight, one you would willing go along with.
5. Their Rules:
Hunting in full body make up and wig, she can blend in and manipulate better than male psychopaths. With her schizophrenic leanings, looking at some men she sees visions and hears the voices of their supposed victims, no one really knows if this is mediumship or delusions. Only killing will quiet the voices and entertain her.
6. Their Mythology:
Her parents are still alive and never abused her, her father has never had anything to do with tattooing. She does not have alopecia. Her identical twin sister was abducted at the age of 5 in front of her and was never found, after which she began to exhibit behaviors between psychopathy and schizophrenia. She claims to talk to her sister, who brings through the spirits of other victims (the viewer is on a journey to decide/discover the facts for themselves schizophrenia or mediumship).
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Subject “The Ritual”
Horror Conventions
What I learned doing this assignment is watching the range of emotion being dialed up and down, scene by scene. Seeing the tension being setup between the characters, this furthers the experience of isolation. Observing the theme being restated of “Gutless” or coward. In the opening scene the lead character fails to act when his friend is attacked, he hides instead. This theme carries forward as one by one his other friends are killed by the monster and displayed “gutless”. As the story progresses the lead character is always the first to see each warning sign, ignoring the warning they move forward to another loss. Runes are used to insert symbology into the story. When down to the final and lead character left alive, one of the villagers delivers exposition on the monster. The lead character escapes and set’s fire to the trophy room, this hails the return of the monster and pits the character between the “burning house” and the “monster” furthering the theme of the fire you have created and facing your demons head on. Only after running out the door of the burning cabin past the monster, has he earned the right to the full visual reveal of the monster.
· Terrorize The Characters:
o Opening scene involves the brutal murder of 1 of 5 friends, with one witnessing the killing while remaining frozen in his own fear.
o None one wanted to hike remote Sweden, only the friend who was killed in a robbery wanted to go. (Begins with low level common dread, in memorial of a tragedy, before turning up the heat)
o They discover the first sign, an eviscerated animal carcass displayed in the trees after entering the wilderness
o They take shelter in a cabin during a rainstorm, with hanging rune symbols (matching forest tree carvings) and a ritualistic effigy in the attic
o They are terrorized by dreams/visons while sleeping at the cabin. One by his visions of their common friend whom he was too cowardly to save, he is marked on his chest during the vision.
o After leaving the cabin, due to weather and injury they camp. The character who lead them into the forest is snatched from his tent, while they are each isolated in their own tents.
o Leaving their equipment behind they search in the night for the missing leader, who is found displayed and eviscerated in the trees (gutless is a repeated theme, synonym for the cowardliness in the opening liquor store death scene).
o The lead character runs ahead separating and finding what looks to be their destination from a ridge top, turns to see a second friend is snatched by the monster.
o The remaining two race off in the dark after discovering the second friend eviscerated and displayed in the trees. Following a path of small tree stump torches to a village.
o They are captured and bound in a cabin, for no known reason.
o The lead character who is marked is given water by an old woman possessing the same marks.
o Lead character escapes his ropes to find a “ritual trophy” room
o Lead character sets the “ritual trophy” room in the attic on fire, trapping himself between the burning building and the returning monster.
· Isolation:
o Hike in remote Sweden
o They take a “shortcut” through wilderness due to a one friend twisting an ankle
o When camping they are isolated in individual tents
o They are isolated by their strained relationship and questions over the death of a friend.
o They are literally and figuratively “off the beaten path”
o The lead character is “marked” during a vision, singling him out.
· Death:
o Opening scene, a friend dies in a robbery.
o An animal carcass is found after entering the woods.
o The character who leads them into the woods is killed.
o A tent, a shoe, id and credit card of a missing family is found by the group.
o A second member of the group is taken by the monster before their eyes and killed.
o A third member of the group is given up as a sacrifice to the monster and killed by it.
o The final member and lead character is told “your ritual begins tomorrow” threat of death
o Lead character shoots a member of the village point blank, assumed dead
o The monster kills the older woman for the burning of the “trophies”
· Monster/Villain:
o Ancient Nordic God
o Bastard child of Loki
o Demands sacrifice of a life in exchange for long life
o Remains confined to the secluded forest
· High Tension:
o The story begins with “normal” tension, setting up an emotional comparison for what is to come.
o No one agrees on the location of the trip (everyday tension)
o A friend dies with only one witness, his story does not make sense (strained friendships)
o Early on one member is injured on the hike, no one else believes his injury to be bad enough to delay them though he insists the pain is too great. (Disagreement about his level of injury causing prolonged journey)
o They leave the hiking trail and enter the forest (uncharted territory)
o They encounter gruesome displays
o They encounter signs of carved runes
o Prolonged cold along with thunderstorms
o Seek shelter in a creepy cabin, disagreeing on the decision
o Encounter ritual effigy
o Death of friends, loss of map
o Question main character’s role in friends’ murder
o Captured and bound
o Listening to a friend’s death while being bound and afraid to act
· Departure from Reality:
o Remote location in Sweden
o A living descendent God/Beast of Loki
o A village that remains unknown to society
o Ancient religion kept alive and secret
· Moral Statement:
o Face your fears head on, or they and the price you pay will only grow larger
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1. Charles Ferrell
2. Zero
3. An understanding of screenplay and more specifically horror development frameworks/conventions.
4. Was once a Funeral Director & Embalmer (my family is not in the business, I chose it…or maybe it found me)
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Charles Ferrell
I agree to the terms of this release form
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.
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Not ignoring your offer, had to go back to the day job. Doing more rewrite today before I’m ready to exchange.
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This is my first script, can someone explain how this phase works?
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I like this idea and what if…..normal humans are a previous version? V2
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