
Christine Cornelius
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ASSIGNMENT 1
Chris Cornelius’ Height of the Emotion.
What I learned doing this assignment is: I have various lines in my script that will be remembered; And they are used throughout; but I also have visual symbols and sounds running through the course of the story (hawk feathers and little boys’ laughter) that the audience will feel.
Make a list of the 5 most
emotional moments in your screenplay.1) At the end-when Trish takes out her old motorcycle gear and goes through the lengthy (moving) ritual of putting on her leathers in front of a full length mirror in the attic.
2) She doesn’t say anything at that most emotional moment. It is visual; but it all leads up to her final VO.
3) Donning her old gear she reconnects with her past, regains her confidence,
becomes stronger, and renews her spirit.
Trish pulls a slip of paper out of the jacket’s pocket. “Tom… 601-243-0140… Call whenever.”
Remembering, Trish looks into the mirror and slowly zips her jacket over her body as Tom had.
When she rides off on her new motorcycle in the end we can only guess where she’s going.
TRISH’s VO Motorcycling has been many things to me; stranger than fiction adventure, therapy, a cleansing–always romantic. It has now advanced to a spiritual phase, a higher realm of biking, with all of its passion and rituals, and moments for reflection and healing.
1) Reaching the Pacific. From sea to shining sea.
2) Life’s a journey, not a guided tour.
3) Trish has arrived at the West Coast. She hurls some water up into the air and it sparkles all around her. She’s wearing the Great Spirits T-shirt and immediately sits down to write a letter to Nella-her grandmother that crossed the Atlantic to America from the old country and made this venture possible.
She’s hit by the frisbee of some bored LA boys that say she’s got all the luck.
TRISH – Luck? Ha… more like desire, planning and endurance.
When she turns away from them they read the back of her t-shirt.
“Life’s an odyssey, not a guided tour.”
1) Stranded in the Grand Canyon North Rim Lodge looking out at a dramatic storm.
2) Dream Lofty Dreams and as you dream so shall you become.
Man learns by suffering and from bliss.
Dreamers are Saviors of the World
3) Trish’s campsite is a distance away. The sun is setting and it is storming at the Rim. Other people are stranded in the great observation room. Trish starts reading the book. ‘As a Man Thinketh’ given to her by Aspen Matt.
TRISH – My dream is to squeeze all the juice out of life and someday be a wise old woman with tales to tell.
Dream Lofty Dreams
1) Dehydrated and sun-poisoned, Trish, has collapsed at a gas station in Aspen. Naturist Matt helps her.
2) Trish flashes back to her depression struggles: It was like waiting out a storm that was in my own head.
And why she’s so modest. Male/female relations were becoming so complex.
For dessert Matt and company were doing drugs. I was doing life.
3) Matt has taken Trish to his cabin in the woods outside Aspen. He’s always naked in nature so after some serious soul searching Trish tries it; only to be thwarted when Matt’s former girlfriend (a stripper) and his best friend arrive.
They’re all really into Matt’s cocaine so they indulge in it in Matt’s camper that night. Trish stays outside enjoying the night stars.
I was doing life.
1) Trish meets and falls in love with Tom in Natchez.
2) I am not naïve… but I am positive enough to hope for the best.
Relax Patricia… Relax.
He’s settled down with a need for adventure and I’m adventurous with a need to settle down.
When traveling leave your heart at home.
My trip sabotaged by my heart.
If only my brains would get ahead of my heart and clear the way
3) Trish a law-abiding, career minded, Northern city girl, falls in love with a Southern country boy mechanic with children on a pot farm in Mississippi.
He’s settled down with a need for adventure and I’m adventurous with a need to settle down.
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ASSIGNMENT 2
Christine Cornelius’ Meaning Over Multiple Experiences.
What I learned doing this assignment is this script has a lot of repeat phrases, many of which Trish says to herself (VOs) like “Where are your brains girl?” And “Relax Patricia… Relax.”
1) Great spirits often encounter violent opposition from mediocre minds.
2) Great spirits – Trish just doesn’t fit a mold. She always finds herself on a road less traveled. And this is not by choice. It is just what’s natural to her. She can’t do anything else.
Often encounter violent opposition – People say she can’t or shouldn’t do what she wants or is trying to do.
From mediocre minds – Mainly ‘uninspired’ minds. People who have always tried to fit the mold and/or seccumbed to peer pressure.
3&4) This line first appears when the grandmother, who is a great spirit, gives Trish the embroidered T-shirt at the intervention. This is to show Trish support for taking the trip in opposition to all those who are discouraging her.
3&4) It appears when the little dog steals Trish’s dirty laundry from her tent and distributes it around the campground. The dog is the great spirit that is doing something ‘out of the ordinary’ and Trish is the mediocre mind-that’s sick and coping to deal with enough already.
3&4) It appears in the attic when she is going through the remembrances of her travels. It reminds her of her great spirit that has been dashed over the years and it helps her begin to heal so that she can continue on to collect more stories to tell.
1) Life is an odyssey not a guided tour.
2) Life – one’s being through time
Is an odyssey – has its twists and turns, ups and downs, joys and sorrows, anything can happen
Not a guided tour – not predictable or planned
3&4) This line first appears when the foreign born grandmother, who is a great spirit, gives Trish the Great Spirits T-shirt at the intervention. It is printed on the back.
It shows the grandmother’s support for Trish’s odyssey that is possible due to all the sacrifices she made to come to this country.
3&4) It appears when Trish reaches the Pacific and tells the bored LA boys that life is what you make it.
3&4) It appears in the attic along with the other remembrances of her travels and reminds her that the depressed period she’s going through is just part of the odyssey and it’s up to her to renew and move on.
1) He’s settled down with a need for adventure and she’s adventurous with a need to settle down.
2) He’s settled down — Tom is being a responsible single parent, keeping a nice home for his children.
With a need for adventure – The illegal marijuana business is filling his need for adventure.
She’s adventurous – Trish is a free spirit enjoying her travels after many years of hard work.
With a need to settle down – She learns in this trip, by the fact that she is so drawn to Tom and his family, that at age 26 settling down lies ahead.
3&4) At the intervention Trish’s Aunt says – “Working at Harvard, couldn’t you just meet a nice professor and settle down?”
A bit of a premonition (regarding Tom) and statement about the old world expectations of Trish at this stage in her life.
3&4) Trish VO’s this line when she’s holding Tom asleep in her arms in the back yard after the barbecue.
TRISH – How could I let this happen? How could I stop it?
3&4) This line appears in the final VO for the 1979 trip’s storyline after Trish has torn herself away from the Mississippi family and is heading back home. She’s summarizing the events of that trip.
TRISH – What started a sightseeing trip, endedn a 15,000 mile celebration of life, and served to bridge my youth to my adulthood.
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Chris Cornelius Delivers Irony!
What I learned doing this assignment is: contrasting scenes create more impact and show rather than tell the story.
Trish rejects all of the undertaker’s proposals to get her to stay in Nashville, because it would mean leaving all the things she enjoys behind in Cambridge.
Then, shortly after, Trish falls in love with Tom and his Natchez world and doesn’t want to leave.
Trish evades a direct answer to James’ question about whether or not she could be more than just a travel companion with him. Her answer, ‘Things like that take time with me.’
The next day Trish and, love-at-first-sight, Tom are posing for a picture. James is having some trouble operating Tom’s camera and says, ‘Things like this take time with me.’
Trish is questioning the Vietnam vets about her quandary of wanting to be with Tom… ‘But he’s a bit of an outlaw.’
One of the vets retorts, ‘You just wet-backed it to the US from Mexico. That makes you a bit of an outlaw.’
Trish wanted to ride alone so, she and James went separate ways in Southern Texas. Trish is grossed out by a trash truck driver at a rest area. ‘Hey there biker chick… Hows ‘ bout you an’ me go out for a beer and some fun?’
Trish’s thinking voice over, ‘ So’s this what I’m in for now that James is gone.
TRUCKER—That’s whachu been doin’ain’t it? Ridin’ ‘round, campin’ out, makin’ a little love…
TRISH’s VO thoughts, ‘Have to hand it to him. That just about summed it up.’
In D.C . Trish is visiting with her Afro-American undergraduate roommate Sandy. They sit at a table eating her mother’s cookies and talking about what to keep from their upbringing. Trish holds up a cookie and says, ‘I’ll keep these.’
In Mississippi, Trish and Tom are sitting at a table in a restaurant when Trish discovers that blacks eat in the back of the building.
TOM – It’s understood this place serves whites only.
TRISH – You mean my own best friend Sandy wouldn’t be able to come here with me because she’s black?
TOM – Guess not.
On boring Highway 90 Trish is entertained by a biker, Pete, doing stunts on his bike alongside her. They carry on this dance/romance for many miles.
TRISH VO –Something about this felt right to me—two people riding, available to but independent of each other, sharing a wonderful time down a highway heading in the same direction—a recipe for life—intoxicating, seductive. I want it to last longer.
This is a good-bye to her single life’
Before they part Trish says, ‘Hey let me feel your throttle hand.’ And ‘I’ll never forget you.’
And she’s off to Mississippi-and family life.
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Chris Cornelius Delivers Insights Through Conflict
What I learned doing this assignment is “ more about which scenes to keep to make the greatest impact on the viewing audience.” I’ve got to also concern myself with the flow of the comedic contrasting with painful scenes; and the grander contrasting with the more intimate scenes.
1)–With your list of the New Ways / Insights you want audiences to experience, go through these steps:
2)– Come up with at least five (5) different ways you can use conflict to express an insight:
Step 1. What is the New Way / Insight you want to deliver?
You’ve got to take the good and leave the bad behind.
Step 2. What kind of conflict could that insight show up in?
Trish is very upset by the hellish, smoky scene of the guys all sitting around the dining room table bagging up marijuana.
Step 3. Brainstorm ways you might deliver the insight through the conflict.
Trish lifts her glass of water to Tom and says ‘Cheers.’ She escapes to the bedroom through the side door, bypassing the unrelatable southern women.
Tom talks with Trish in the bedroom and says, ‘It’s just something I’ve got to do.’ Trish tells him there’s something she’s got to do… ‘See what Natchez looks like from Cambridge.’
Step 1. What is the New Way / Insight you want to deliver?
Live, learn, and renew.
Step 2. What kind of conflict could that insight show up in?
Trish is devastated leaving Tom and his children, traveling north on the Natchez Trace-crying and saying, ‘Why do I have to be so strong all the time.’ To make things even worse she runs out of gas in ‘Easy Rider’ country. ‘At least there aren’t any vultures flying overhead.’
Step 3. Brainstorm ways you might deliver the insight through the conflict.
But the Hawk rolls and rolls and rolls, right up to a road crew of prisoners cutting down the kudzu. And the Warden has a prisoner fill up her tank with ‘the only gas you’re going to find on the Natchez Trace.’
Elated by her stroke of good luck-divine intervention, Trish gets on the Interstate to motorcycle home.
Step 1. What is the New Way / Insight you want to deliver?
Life is an odyssey, not a guided tour.
Step 2. What kind of conflict could that insight show up in?
At the Intervention Trish’s theatrical gay friend Simon reminds her of her illness (bipolar disorder) and wonders what she’ll do if it raises its ugly head. She says she’ll convalesce as she always does.
Step 3. Brainstorm ways you might deliver the insight through the conflict.
Simon gives Trish a stage gun for her trip and commits quite a comical disturbance at the intervention. ‘It may scare off bad guys and can’t be used against you.’ Trish loves it; but later suffers a great deal of unexpected anxiety when her bags are searched at the Capitol in Washington. They don’t see it and she collects another story to tell.
Step 1. What is the New Way / Insight you want to deliver?
When one door closes another opens..
Step 2. What kind of conflict could that insight show up in?
Trish has mixed feelings about meeting Matt at the San Francisco PO so that they can travel together. She loves Tom but couldn’t bring herself to reject Matt’s idea of joining her. It will get him away from his cocaine dealing and ex-girlfriend who has started seeing his best friend. Matt knows about Trish’s conflict over Tom. And Tom actually said in a phone call that she should be traveling with someone. Matt is interesting and she feels she may learn something from him.
Step 3. Brainstorm ways you might deliver the insight through the conflict.
Trish waits for Matt three times at designated locations but only visits the last, the PO, to see if he’s there and leaves a note for him at general delivery. We see that she’s motorcycling off from one side of the PO just as Matt is arriving at the other.
Later in a phone call to Matt’s friend back in Aspen, Trish finds out that Matt had arrived. But he says he’ll never catch up with her and sincerely wishes her the best in her relationship with Tom.
Trish feels guilty about not waiting longer for Matt at the PO, but soon after decides to make a major detour to see Tom and meet his children before getting back to her job in Cambridge.
Step 1. What is the New Way / Insight you want to deliver?
1) Great spirits often encounter violent opposition from mediocre minds.
Step 2. What kind of conflict could that insight show up in?
Trish, herself, is conflicted many times. The idea of traveling cross country originated with her boyfriend of a few months the prior fall. She met him at the dealership where she purchased her first bike and they rode together for a while. After she had latched onto the idea, he let her know that he had an ailment that prevented him from making such a trip.
She knew all the risks and was somewhat scared herself. She may have been at the higher end of her bipolar cycle when she decided to go solo. And once she made a decision her drive to not fail kept her going.
Step 3. Brainstorm ways you might deliver the insight through the conflict.
She had an inspired mind and everyone but her Grandmother opposed the idea. She had traveled to this country at age 14, not knowing the language to work in the factories. And Trish’s adventure would not have been possible without her trials.
Along her travels at times she had her own doubts, and there were skeptics, but the longer she ventured, the more expert she became; and she survived all the head, heart, body, soul and spirit challenges she faced to fulfill the hometown homeless hippy’s exclamation, ‘This is going to change your life.’
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ASSIGNMENT 2
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Chris Cornelius’ Turns Insights Into ActionWhat I learned doing this assignment is: Trish is growing so much as she travels along she goes through the cycle of old ways becoming new ways becoming old ways becoming new ways time and time again. Not circularly as in Ground Hog Day… but linearly.
Create a list of the New Ways and Insights you’d like audiences to experience when they watch your movie.
1) Great spirits often encounter violent opposition from mediocre minds.
Discrimination against Trish when she’s young and is rejected by her brother’s friends because she’s female.
MIT guys worry about her.
Her family had an intervention.
Tom says she really ought to be traveling with someone.
The trash truck driver belittles her.
2) When one door closes, another opens.
Trish missed Tom of course, but she met the Vietnam vets, soon after.
Trish missed the Vietnam vets, the older brothers she never had, but then she met Matt-the spiritual naturist soon after.
She shared her soul and art with Joe Bones the hippy jeweler, but then traveled on learning more and more about people’s worlds and herself, collecting many more stories to tell.
She said good-bye to Andy, leader of the Lords, who understood her very well.
And then felt quite a loss saying good-bye to Pete-the stunt rider-‘Let me feel your throttle hand’ because she was closing the door to her single life, before exploring the world of Tom and his children.
3) You’ve got to take the good and leave the bad behind.
The undertaker wasn’t really bad, but he was trying to buy Trish to work in one of his businesses. So she took the fun memory of him, learned a lot about what was important to her, and left his materialism behind.
Trish took all of the decency she was raised with along with her on her travels and left the sheltered life she led behind.
Trish took all of the experience of family life she gained in Mississippi and left, being an accessory to dealing in marijuana, behind.
Trish took Matt’s book, ‘As a Man Thinketh’ and some fun memories of him; and left behind a man/friend who was not right for her at that time in her life.
4) Life is an odyssey, not a guided tour.
There were many bumps and detours along the road.
Trish dumps the bike a couple times and is stronger because of it.
And many good things happened as the result of something bad happening.
Meeting the jazzy man in the Cadillac who saved her when she ran out of gas in Southern Texas.
Her trip took a major detour because she needed her bike tuned and met Tom.
She got sick and was nursed back to health by Matt.
5) Live, learn and renew.
This script is written in three storylines that show the development of this person, Trish, through three different stages of her life, all ending on a different bike.
Life or death experiences mellow over time.
She wants to someday be an old lady with stories to tell.
In the process of trying to down size with great difficulty in her attic, and coming across all of her life’s memorabilia… she gives up and takes off to make more memor
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ASSIGNMENT 1
——————-Chris Cornelius’) Seabiscuit Analysis
What I learned doing this assignment is: the story is held together by the development of the three different backgrounds meshing into a shared purpose.
1. Watch the movie SEABISCUIT. As you do, look for the Profound Moments (any moment in the story that seems profound to you).
2. List the Profound Moments, then tell briefly what made them profound for you.
Many of these scenes are premonitions of what’s to come; many analogize what has already happened; many are wisdoms; many relate to similarities in literature; the dinner scenes mirror the mood and plot; many flashbacks connect the plot to the depression era events and mood.
It was the end and beginning of imagination
They ought to make a better spoke. Then what would you do?
If your dream was big enough and you had the guts to follow it, there was truly a fortune to be made.
The dinner scenes – That’s the poetry…The sky’s the limit.
Red watching the jockey for first time.
Child reading Flash Gordon. “It’s about the future.”
The clock ticking while father plays child’s game.
The Flash Gordon book page transitioning into boxing match.
How do you miss a hole like that? Are you blind?
Glances at romantic couples and children from balcony.
Red rejecting George.
You don’t throw a whole life away just because he’s banged up a little.
First time Smith meets Seabiscuit.
Seabiscuit forced to leave his mother / like Red.
How Smith meets red-fighting boys-while Seabiscuit is fighting men.
He just needs to learn how to be a horse again.
How far do you want me to take him? Until he stops. That seems like a pretty good ride.
Father rturns to son’s room, looks at barn and decides to get rid of cars and bring in horses. He’s healing and starting to move on.
This isn’t the finish line… the future is the finish line.
Quoting Shakespeare… noticing little kids.
Premonition… just got to win one more.
We just gave him a chance. Sometimes all someone needs is a second chance.
Why the stumble on the word ‘destiny.’
One of Seabiscuit’s eyes was blocked in the shot before the race during which red’s blind eye is discovered.
You don’t throw a whole life away just because he’s bagged up a little.
This is a horse that won’t give up.
Father playing with his son’s toy while Red is in the hospital.
It’s better to break a man’s leg than his heart.
He could die?
As hard as I try that little ball won’t stay in the hole.
He fixed us; and we fixed each other.
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Chris Cornelius’ Counterexamples
What I learned doing this assignment is: These questions being asked by characters in the script are the same questions the audience may want answers to. And that will create a further connection with the lead character – Trish.
– 5 Question Challenges to an Old Way.
Undertaker Tad is trying to appeal to her Old Way by offering her incentives to stay and work for him.
TAD – Wouldn’t you like a life of travel and luxury?
TAD – What more can I offer you?
Bart and Tom are teaching Trish how to shoot a rifle. Trish hits all six cans at the far end of the yard.
TOM – Who’d you say you were?
TRISH – What do you mean? You saw my resume.
TOM – Yeah… one line said you worked for the US Government.
TRISH – That’s right… Former Fed… a summer desk job for Social Security. Worried are you?
TOM – So where’d you learn to shoot.
TRISH – You just taught me.
Trish is discussing here Head vs Heart and Freedom vs Settling Down predicament regarding Tom.
TRISH – Even met a man that has me thinking about settling down.
PHIL – Well hell. You ain’t ever gonna settle down girl. (to guys) Well look at her.
JOHN – I am looking at her… and I see someone that’s going to do whatever she decides to do,
SON (present story line) – How could you have done that… and alone? What if you had an accident? And weren’t you worried about the people you’d meet?
TRISH – It was actually sad leaving the people I met, but I learned I’d cheer up by meeting new people. When one door closes another opens.
LA BOY – You came all the way across the country on this?
ANDY – I like watchin them fly. Must feel great to be that free… Is that why you ride alone?
TRISH – I don’t know. I don’t feel so alone. I’m with whomever I want to be with. I just think about them. And I can be whoever I want to be ’cause there’s no one around to define me.
– 5 Counterexamples to an Old Way.
Chilhood friends of Trish’s brothers sexually discriminate against her on their way to crabbing..
FRIEND DON – Woah, we’ not goin’ anywhere widda girl.
BOTHER STEVE – Girl? What girl?
FRIEND ROB – Girls can’t go crabbin.’
YOUNG BROTHER ARTY – That’s not a girl… That’s our sister.
During the Intervention to discourage Trish from taking her cross county motorcycle trip.
AUNT – Your poor mother.
BROTHER TED – Yeah…We give you a fifty-fifty chance of survival.
AUNT – Working at Harvard couldn’t you just meet a nice professor and settle down?
COUSIN CATH – Your not going alone are you?
COUSIN CATH – What do you have a death wish or something?
Trish is confiding in the Vietnam Vets about her issues with Tom’s marijuana business.
TRISH – This Mississippi man is a bit of an outlaw.
JOHN – Really? What’s he doing?
TRISH – Growing pot.
PHIL – Awe shit… You’re worried about that? Got news for you girl.
John and Joey feel uncomfortable. John quickly interrupts.
JOHN – You wet-backed it from Mexico today. That makes you a bit off an outlaw.
WOMAN at rest area – … Are you running into any problems traveling alone?
TRISH – Not so far.
WOMAN – Do you carry a gun?
TRISH – Not a Real one.
WOMAN – You ought to at least pick up a can of mace.
TRISH – Hmm… Yeah… Maybe I should.
TRASH TRUCK DRIVER – Hey biker chick. Hows about you an me go out for some beers and some fun?
Trish shakes her head.
TRUCK DRIVER – That’s what you been doin’ ain’t it? Ridin’ round, campin out, makin a little love…
TRISH (25/VO) – Had to hand it to him… That just about summed it up.
Matt is dealing with cocaine and feels comfortable as a natrurist.
MATT – What are you gonna do… drag those (sheets) through the woods with you? I take ev’ry chance I get to walk naked in nature. It feels great!
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Day 9 Assignment 1
Chris Cornelius’ 12 Angry Men Analysis
What I learned doing this assignment is: How many changes occurred in these men’s lives because of their participation on this jury in this case. The impact for most has gone way beyond the courtroom .
I was waiting to see if the jury was going to be polled in the end.
The old ways and challenges and changes are obvious; so for now I am turning my attentian to my script rather than detailing everything in ’12 Angry Men.
Day 9 Assignment 2
Chris Cornelius’ Old Ways Challenge Chart
What I learned doing this assignment is: I can now go back and make some of the necessary cuts, and expand where needed. The most important characters are those that develop Trish’s mind, heart, body, spirit and soul. I can try to trim some of the flashbacks to her childhood. But the main place for edits is in her Senior present storyline. I wrote the memoirs of this trip a generation ago and the first draft of the script 20 years ago. Sometimes I think the world might be a different place if this story had been produced back then. It has universal themes that unite rather than create conflict; and flashbacks to a time when The United States was loved and respected.
Trish’s old ways are she’s:
-an overachiever.
-grew up in a factory town; family of eight living in a 3rd floor five room apartment in her grandmother’s triple decker.
-seven years of college; MFA in Design and Technical Theater; teaching Costumes and Set Design at Harvard
-inexperienced with much of anything outside her family’s beliefs, her schooling, and education; a sheltered life.
-has never traveled or taken a vacation.
-she’s been dealing with untreated Manic Depressive illness since she was 18 yrs old-certainly not a sheltered life in that respect.
-she’s an inexperienced motorcyclist-taught herself a year before the trip.
-she’s never even slept in a tent before.
-no one else to be responsible for but herself; free spirit.
-she doesn’t even realize that her life needs direction.
Reality sets in:
First of all she says goodbye to all of her colleagues; has several obstacles to navigate motorcycling to her parents home in CT before actually starting the trip; Her CT family and friends have an intervention.
But for her Grandmother who adventured to the US from Lithuania at age 14, and embroidered the Einstein quote “Great Spirits often Encounter Violent Opposition from Mediocre Minds” onto a T-Shirt for Trish.
Everything that has been seen or said up to now reappears on down the road. For example a stage gun and whistle given to her; a line about ‘deathwish;’ MIT friends liking southern women and Air & Space Museum.
Trish rides for one last look at the Atlantic Ocean.
A homeless hippy tells her, “This is going to change your life.” People give her a thumbs up.
She gets onto the interstate. First major trial-cross winds. Pulls over to shoulder near ‘Welcome to New York’ sign; collects herself then carries on.
Bypassing NYC she stops at a Ho Jo’s on the New Jersey Turnpike.
Wall St. Broker (9 to 5-er) inspired asks to sit with her and pays for her lunch, then wants to follow her down the road. Trish is quickly seeing her impact on people-something she had not anticipated at all. People’s curiosity was raised and inhibitions lowered.
She’s observed a less than inspired Wall Street livelihood.
She stops to visit undergraduate roommate and childhood friend, Sandy, in DC. They discuss breaking away from their upbringings.
Trish visits the Capital. Her stage gun is overlooked when her bag is searched cause the official is distracted by her full face ‘Air & Space’ helmet. A smitten Harley riding Aide offers to carry her loaded down bag.
Trish meets up with James (a comical character), her, thru ‘Easy Rider Country’ motorcycling travel companion. He’s from her ‘Old World’ and transitions her into the Odyseus like ‘Other World’ she’s entering with its head, heart, body, spirit and soul challenges and growth. She wants to keep things plutonic.
They meet the mortician that specializes in accident victims. He offers Trish a job with many benefits (things) that she rejects. We see her Old World values before she enters the ‘Other World.’
The Hawk needs its 1500 mile checkup. Trish meets Tom, the motorcycle shop superviser. Charmed by his southern accent & hospitallity she accepts his invitation to dinner and into his settled world, with a home and two children, and like dominos one thing leads to another and she falls in love.
But HEART Conflicts… 1) He’s an outlaw growing marijuana. “He’s settled down with a need for adventure and she’s adventurous with a need to settledown.” 2) She’s got to continue her quest-the trip.
So she continues traveling with Tom sending her general delivery letters along the way.
Now, along her travels she’s debating the Head vs Heart conflict and Freedom vs Home.
As planned, she and travel companion James go their separate ways in southern Texas.
Worst day. Out of gas, rained on, sad, hot and sick; 2 State workers in a truck hesitate to give her a ride. “Well you can pick me up alive now… or dead later.” They cave. Returning to the bike a godsend jazzy black man in a Cadillac picks her up… and gives her the will to continue. “life or death matters mellow over time.”
Next, sad and sick, she meets the comical Vietnam Veterans at Big Bend–the older brothers she never had. They wade the Rio Grand into Mexico, and she gets their opinions on her conflicts. Did they bring a stash of marijuana back?
She’s off to Colorado. At a rest area she calls Tom-he’s not home; then deals with paparazzi: a young airforce cadet that needs to photograph her, hippy woman in VW van who asks if she carries a gun and recommends she get some bear spray, and a lowlife trash trucker that sizes her up.
There are storylines within the storylines as Trish travels along, learning she got to close one door so another can open, and to keep the good and leave the bad behind.
At a Boulder hostel Trish meets two traveling midwester girls. One is dealing with a freedom vs home issue. And a ping pong playing excon tells Trish he just got out of prison–5 years for trafficking marijuana.
It’s Satrurday and Trish tries to pick up a general delivery letter from Tom at the Boulder PO but they won’t give it to her until Monday, when she’ll be long gone. So they forward it to San Francisco. Heart break.
Trish tries calling Tom from the Continental Divide but again he’s not home.
Tired, disappointed and sick, Trish faints at an Aspen gas station and upon wakening finds herself in SPIRITUAL naturist Matt’s cabin loft. She meets and plays horseshoes with his best friend Kurt and Suzie (Matt’s former girlfriend). Matt nurses Trish spiritually and physically back to health.
All Trish’s gear gets stolen off her bike in Aspen.
Matt, inspired to give up his cocaine dealing, buys a bike and plans to meet Trish in San Fransisco in a couple weeks. He insists she take his copy of, ‘As a Man Thinketh’ to read along the way.
Trish finally connects with Tom by phone who says “you really should be traveling with someone.”
Continuing her trip Trish meets (comical character) in converted school bus jeweler Joe Bones. They share their art, he relates to her interests and touches her SOUL. He secretly tucks a witch’s ring inside Trish’s gear.
Trish dumps the bike trying to jump a wash on an isolated road in search of the town used in the filming of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.
Stranded due to stormy weather in the Grand Canyon’s North Rim Lodge Trish reads from Spritual Matt’s book, ‘Dream lofty dreams and as ye dream so shall ye become.’ ‘Dreamers are saviors of the world.’ ‘Man learns both by suffering and by bliss.’ She discovers Joe Bones’ witches ring in her bag.
She rides up the Las Vegas Strip, then heads into a gorgeous Death Valley sunset.
The Hawk suddenly loses power and Trish celebrates the stars over the desert.
Cooled down the Hawk starts again, gets her to a campground where she’s suffering from food poisoning.
A little dog distributes her dirty laundry around the campground and Trish high tails it to the Pacific Ocean–a milestone. She remembers how her grandmother traveled across the ocean to the US from Lithuania.
Two bored unproductive LA boys read Trish’s T-shirt, ‘Life is an odyssey, Not a guided tour.’
Trish arrives at San Francisco YMCA hostel and meets unemployed actor Pat as she’s trying to get her motorcycle up the front steps. Turns out when the clerk said she should bring her bike into the building thinking bicycle, not motorcycle.
She picks up a mail-i-gram from Matt at the PO and the precious long awaited letter from Tom.
She waits and waits for Matt but finally gives up. And leaves a general delivery letter for him at the PO. Looking in opposite directions, they just miss each other.
Trish camps in the Sequoias enjoying two young camper boys–inspiring her to head back to Mississippi.
She writes a letter to Tom, and the children’s story, ‘The Lady and the Hawk.’
A series of North Pacific coast shots get her to the entrance to Canada where they search her entire bike and confiscate her bear/pepper spray saying, “Canadian men don’t hurt women.” Trish answers, “What about the Canadian grizzly bear.”
No sooner does Trish ride onto a ferry, when a Canadian outlaw motorcycle gang rides on board. Andy their leader hangs out with Trish. He really seems to understand her thinking (HEAD) and insists she lead them down the road because her headlight is the brightest.
She’s become very proficient at riding, dodging open range cattle, and navigating sandy mountain switchbacks-in great physical and mental shape-BODY.
She meets the Mythic, Motorcycle Man–life experience to boot–but she’s ‘not there yet.’
At a Grande Tetons hostel Trish converses with hiker Heidi (preparing to get married and have children) about the conflict between a sense of home vs sense of adventure.
Trish writes letter to Tom’s children about the animals she’s seen and not seen.
A bear attacks her site–no bear spray or death wish–uses Joe Bones’ witch’s ring facing out to ward off the bad.
Trish motorcycles near Sturgis’ Rally, Mount Rushmore and the Badlands. She calls Tom from a roadside pay phone–she’s heading to Missippippi to be with him and meet his children.
Cute young Pete entertains Trish with stunt riding down the boring flat highway. “Let me feel your throttle hand.” Good-bye single life.
The ‘men only’ hostel in Sioux City won’t take her so she travels another 100 miles to an Omaha (retirement home for nuns) hostel. They pray for her as she (like Maria) heads back to Mississippi (her captain).
Trish picks up one last love letter from Tom in Kansas City.
In the home stretch a biker comrade helps her with some light for setting up her tent. She says I never met a biker I didn’t like. He says, “Come to think of it, all the prople whose values I question are non-bikers.”
Cop stops her for speeding. “Where’s the fire?” “In my heart.”
Trish arrives at Natchez-The Hideaway; and experiences Mississippi family home life-in the wife and mother figure role-new for her. She reads ‘The Lady and the Hawk’ children’s story; they cook together ride 3-wheelers; camp out in Trish’s tent; visit Tom’s parents and on and on.
Then reality starts setting in.
While out at a segregated resturant the blacks eat in the back, so her friend Sandy wouldn’t even be able to eat out with her; It is unbearably hot and humid; she’s unable to relate to the southern women; Tom’s friend Bart takes a loaded gun into the tent with the kids; She would be an accessory to the smokey evil illegal business of growing and bagging up dried marijuana…
Trish needs to get back to work-her contract with Harvard; and to look at Natchez from Cambridge.
She rips herself away as Tom puts his arms around (comforting and/or showing he cares about) his children, and destroyed-rides alone up the Natchez Trace.
With a bad tank of gas, first going on ‘reserve,’ and then completely out, she coasts and coasts to a road crew of prisoners cutting back the Kudzu. The Warden fills her tank with free gas. She marvels at the charmed life she leads and happily heads for the interstate home.
NOTE:
The present (senior) story line, that has been in the background (mainly short VO’s with her more evolved perspective until now) takes focus to complete the arcs (now visible when one sees her memorabilia and how her travels affected her life). The arc regarding Tom comes when she puts on her leathers and finds his phone number and note ‘ call whenever’ in its pocket… then takes off to who knows where on a new bike.
The childhood story line–in the form of flashbacks to give more of a sense of the development of her ‘Old World’ and why she is the way she is; ends with her rising above the sex discrimination, the devastation of the depressed side of her manic depressive illness, and her restricted sheltered life.
And it arcs with her mastery of having taught herself to ride a motorcycle.
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Lesson 8
Chris Cornelius’ Profound Ending
“What I learned doing this assignment is: that the over all best message from this script is ‘live learn and renew.’
1. What is your Profound Truth and how will it be delivered powerfully in your ending?
Live, learn and renew.
Each of the three storylines (childhood, 1979 trip, present) ends on a different motorcycle after a great deal of strife and growth.
We see the progress she’s made at 3 different stages of her life… and she’s not done yet.
2. How do your lead characters (Change Agent and Transformable Characters) come to an end in a way that represents the completed change?
For Trish it is each of the three story lines.
For the change agent characters it is when Trish is trying to downsize–looking through all of the memorabilia she’s kept in her attic from her life and travels. She revisits her interactions with these characters and we see how they contributed to her life, completing their purpose and life in her life.
3. What are the setup/payoffs that complete in the end of this movie, giving it deep meaning?
We see that ‘life is a journey not a guided tour.’
We see how she moved along through life ‘taking the good and leaving the bad behind.’
In the process of downsizing in her attic she’s having problems dealing with the choices she’s having to make: what to keep and what to discard of all of these things she’s saved over time. So for her own sanity she abandons the idea, possibly to take off on a new adventure, or just take a break and gain a new perspective.
One of her sons, who she’s influenced to adventure in life, is also encouraging her to travel earlier in her retirement rather than later.
She emails her friend Sandy about getting together for a spa ritual weekend-learned from her interaction with the vietnam vets
4. How are you designing it to have us see an inevitable ending and then making it surprising when it happens?
We have no idea about whatever happened to Tom–the biggest change agent in her travels.
Trish is inspired to put her old stored leathers on in front of a full length mirror in the attic and becomes stronger and stronger and renewed.
She zips up the front of her jacket, as Tom had when they were parting.
But what’s this? She unzips the breast pocket and finds the scrap of envelope with Tom’s phone number on it “call whenever.”
5. What is the Parting Image/line that leaves us with the Profound Truth in our minds?
Trish is inspired to put her old leathers on and becomes stronger and stronger and renewed.
She zips up the front of her jacket, as Tom had when they were parting.
But what’s this? She unzips the breast pocket and finds the scrap of envelope with Tom’s phone number on it “call whenever.”
Renewed Trish buys a new bike and gives the Mythic Motorcycle Man salute to a young biker at the dealership that is preparing his bike for a cross-county tour. The Mythic Motorcycle Man was the ‘God of Adventurers’ and ‘Warrior for his Soul’ character that Trish met on her way back to Tom when she saw that she still had a lot of life experience to navigate before getting to his point of evolvement.
So the last shots that altenate, supporting and contrasting with each other, are:
(1) Trish’s childhood storyline where she’s elated, after much trial and error, having succeeded in teaching herself to ride a motorcycle.
(2) Trish’s 1979 trip ending with her having succeeded in tearing herself away from the Mississippi family she fell in love with; and being rescued from ‘out of gas’ by the warden of a prisoner road crew; to returning to the life she had made for herself-but changed.
(3) Senior Trish, the present storyline, with Trish speeding off in her old leathers on a new bike to escape from the downsizing.
It’s anyone’s guess where she is off to. To call Tom? To add a new layer of adventure to her life? Visit Sandy? Or for a little joy ride and peace-of-mind, and then back to the downsizing job at hand.
There is a possible addition to the ending where two cars are drag racing on the highway toward her; and it appears she survives this near death by riding between them, because we hear her laughter.
But we also see a bright light rise skyward and a hawk flying off into the brightness.
Which leads us to the question: Is her charmed life still in tact and she’s alive… or dead and off to a higher realm of some kind.
And then there’s another possible level of intrigue. The computer she’s been using in her present story line is clicked off. But by whom? And why?
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Chris Cornelius’ Connection with Audience
What I learned doing this assignment is how much contol I have over the audience.
1. Tell us which characters you are going to INTENTIONALLY create a connection with the audience.
Trish
Tom
2. With each character, tell us how you’ll use each of the four ways of connecting with the audience in the first 30 minutes of the movie.
Trish
A. Relatability – first page: Riding down switchbacks out of the Rockies the biker, in leathers head to toe with a full-face helmet on, switches to the reserve tank and is looking for gas. Not a car, house, vehicle, anything, anywhere in sight. We’ve all been there. !979 was also a year of gas shortage. Many stations were closed.
B. Intrigue – She stops at a dusty old deserted gas station (selling regular and high-test). An attendant comes out. She takes off her helmet and we see that she’s female. Where’s she going? Why alone? I chose to start the script this way to give the audience the same feeling of surprise people had when they first saw her in her travels. That way the audience can also relate to the characters she meets.
C. Empathy – On page 2 the audience will really connect with Trish’s and the gas station attendant’s predicament when he inserts the nozzle into the hole in the gas tank that sits between her legs. Awkward. Embarrassing.
D. Likability – First line: “What state is this?” She’s got an infectious laugh. People like that she’s a symbol of freedom and adventure. They all wish they were doing what she is.
Tom: Enters on page 24, the mechanic that’s tuning her bike.
Trish has already broken away from her family& friends, work and the old world. She’s had encounters with a Wall Street broker, her (through the South) travel companion James, and Tad the mortician.
A. Relatability – The audience is already anticipating Tom’s reaction to Trish and wondering what will happen this time. Love at first sight-the same look as in Dead Poets Society.
B. Intrigue – This is the first time the audience has seen Trish attracted to a man. And he’s quite the opposite of her in many, many ways. He’s settled down with a need for adventure and she’s adventurous with a need to setle down. The marijuana issue, deep south racial discrimination, a man with children… Where’s this headed?
C. Empathy – People can relate to Tom being a single parent, juggling the responsibilities, and trying to do the right thing
D. Likability – He looks and sounds so sweet (the accent), his blue eyes, his accommodating personality-hospitality He’s taking care of the Hawk right away.
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EXPANDED
Chris Cornelius’ Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is: There are so many varied scenes and adventures here, I need to be selective with the main 1979 motorcycle trip stories and insert flashbacks to her upbringing and scenes from the present, on a strictly as-needed-basis.
1. Transformational Logline.
Based on a true story: A tired, once vibrant northern city girl reconnects with her spirit and sons telling captivating, perilous and humorous stories from her 1979 motorcycle odyssey when she fell in love with a man raising two young children and marijuana on a farm in Mississippi.
2. Main character: Trish
Change Agent: Tom, Matt and others
Transformational Character(s): Trish and some of the characters she meets
3. List out your Mini-Movie structure:
This is the Main 1979 cross-country trip story line with flashbacks and present scenes yet to be inserted where needed.
I reached a stage in life called ‘downsizing’ when I had to look back before going forward.
MM #1 – Pages 1 – 15 – Our hero’s status quo, his ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension.
Turning Point: Call to Adventure
Trish leaves her family, friends and job for the summer, and despite some emotional and physical setbacks (Great spirits often encounter violent opposition from mediocre minds) makes it to NYC and meets the first character in her travels, an impressed Wall Street Broker who wants to follow her.
Change Agent: The Odyssey challenges / preparations: mental, physical, and emotional
Transformational Characters: Trish and some of the characters she meets-Wall Street broker is inspired.
Old Ways: Lived in an imbalanced limited sheltered world of intense school and work
The Vision: First summer off–quest to see the country and enjoy life
Challenge: Traveling 15,000 miles seeing the country on a strict budget-by camping and motorcycling with little to no experience-learning as she goes along.
Weaknesses: Fear of the unknown or getting hurt. Inexperience. Only been riding for a year. Has never camped out.
MM #2 – Pages 15 – 30 – Our hero’s denial of the call, and his gradually being “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call.
Turning Point: Locked in.
Trish meets with a former undergraduate roommate in Washington, sees the sites, then meets up with motorcycling James (from Boston) so they can safely travel through Easy Rider country–leaving more of the ‘Old World’ behind. Then meets an undertaker, gate keeper, who reminds her of what is important to her in her old world before entering the other world of the trip. Then she meets and falls in love with motorcycle mechanic Tom-raising two children and marijuana on a farm in Natchez, MS–Huge game changer.
Change Agent: The Odyssey challenges and now Tom – the love interest
Transformational Characters: Trish-always learning as she moves along; and the undertaker, smitten, offers her a job and rooms in his mansion.
Old Ways: been moving along with intentions of sight seeing, retaining her solid upbringing and values
The Vision: seeing the Grand Canyon, Rocky Mountains and Pacific Ocean
Challenge: falling in love on the trip-with an outlaw-Head vs Heart.
Weaknesses: vulnerability of being in love and the loss felt in leaving Tom–head vs heart. Fear of the unknown. Inexperienced. Naive in some regards. Not so street smart. It is the novelty of her that keeps her safe. She represents freedom and adventure. No one wants to harm that.
MM #3 – Pages 30 – 45 – Our hero’s first attempts to solve his problem, the first things that anyone with this problem would try, appealing to outside authority to help him. Ends when all these avenues are shut to our hero.
Turning Point: Standard ways fail.
Trish and Tom enjoy the novelty of each other (target practice, riding three-wheelers); The marijuana conflict arises; Trish reluctantly continues her travels; and she (broken hearted over Tom) and James celebrate 4th of July in New Orleans; then go their separate ways, as planned, in Southern Texas.
Change Agent: The infatuation with Tom and pressure to continue her trip.
Transformational Characters: Trish-always learning as she moves along through people’s lives and becoming a more experienced rider and camper ; and Tom becomes excited. ‘He’s settled down with a need for adventure; and she’s adventurous with a need to settle down.
Old Ways: was a free and unattached overachiever
The Vision: still to continue her quest to tour the US
Challenge: enjoying her travels now that her heart has sabotaged her trip
Weaknesses: love sick-fighting her heart-wanting to return to Tom.
MM #4 – Pages 45 — 60 – Our hero spawns a bigger plan. He prepares for it, gathers what materials and allies he may need, then puts the plan into action — only to have it go horribly wrong, usually due to certain vital information the hero lacked about the forces of antagonism allied against him.
Turning Point: Plan backfires.
Trish survives her worst day (physically and emotionally sick, hot, and out of gas–her trip sabotaged by her heart); rescued by a wise, jazzy, Deus Ex Machina man driving a Cadillac. She then has a Big Bend adventure with 3 Vietnam Veterans: the older brothers she never had; a bizarre, other worldly Austin gazebo rain experience with sculpture student from the university; she calls Tom from busy rest area. He’s not home; In the Boulder hostel she meets Midwestern traveling girls with head vs heart issues, and ex-con-imprisoned 5 yrs for transporting pot; Trish is not allowed to get Tom’s general delivery letter on a Saturday at the PO. It’s forwarded to San Francisco; She calls Tom again from Continental Divide and he’s not ‘the home body he said he was.’
Change Agent: The Odyssey challenges-sick physically and hurting emotionally; questioning the outlaw aspect of the marijuana growing: head vs heart. Meeting a variety of interesting characters every day to learn from. The Deus Ex Machina man keeps her going. The Vietnam Veteran-her ‘older brothers’ entertain her and discuss her predicament as do the Midwestern girls. The excon raises Trish’s fears over the outlaw aspect of Tom. And Tom’s absence when Trish has called him raises some doubts.
Transformational Characters: Trish-always learning as she moves along.
Old Ways: still moving along with intentions of seeing the country, staying true to her decent upbringing while learning so much more about herself and life through her own challenges and the lives of the people she meets.
The Vision: seeing the country and somehow continuing a relationship with Tom.
Challenge: the quest of seeing the country, but now with her heart elsewhere
Weaknesses: vulnerability of being in love (head vs heart); fear of unknown in outlaw matters.
MM #5 – Pages 60 — 75 – Having created his plan to solve his problem WITHOUT changing, our hero is confronted by his need to change, eyes now open to his own weaknesses, driven by the antagonist to change or die. He retreats to lick his wounds.
Turning Point: The decision to change.
Sick, Trish meets, is sheltered by, and recovers with spiritual Aspen, engineer, cocaine dealer Matt. She calls Tom from a bar in town and they finally connect. He says, ‘You really need to travel with someone.’ Trish hangs out with Matt and his former girlfriend and her new boyfriend-Matt’s best friend (a spiritual horse shoe incident). Matt buys a motorcycle and plans to meet Trish in San Francisco in two weeks.
Transformational Characters: Trish lets down some of her defenses to learn from naturist Matt’s ‘spiritual’ life and his pain. And Matt is inspired by Trish to make major changes in his life.
Old Ways: Sheltered, inexperienced life that is still moving along with intentions of seeing the country and learning about the world and people’s lives from the strength of her solid wholesome values and upbringing.
The Vision: seeing the country and somehow continuing a relationship with Tom, and now spiritual Matt.
Challenge: the quest of seeing the country with a big heart that hates leaving the people that she meets and enjoys along the way. She learns to accept those loses because when that door closes, new people are up ahead and another door opens.
Weaknesses: vulnerability of being in love (head vs heart); fear of unknown in outlaw matters; has a problem saying ‘no’-concerning other people’s feelings over her own.
MM #6 – Pages 75 – 90 – Our hero spawns a new plan, but now he’s ready to change. He puts this plan into action…and is very nearly destroyed by it. And then…a revelation.
Turning Point: The ultimate failure.
Trish leaves Aspen, then meets jeweler Joe Bones in converted school bus in Telluride. They share their souls and art–another painful good-bye; Trish has accident trying to jump a wash in the desert with her bike. Unconscious, she flashes back to a tricycle accident she had as a child.
Stranded in rain at the Grand Canyon, a sport bike rider mysteriously comes out from the dark woods behind her and rescues her from riding on the slippery wet gravel to the North Rim Lodge. Later she runs out of gas and coasts more than a mile back to her tent. She travels through Las Vegas; then heads into a fiery orange sunset to Death Valley. The Hawk loses all power in the hot dark night in the desert. It cools down, then starts up. In morning she’s suffering from casino smorgasbord food poisoning. Then a little amusing dog distributes her dirty laundry all over the campground. She takes off for the Pacific where she celebrates and offers wisdom to two bored LA boys.
She tours Hollywood, then up the coast to San Francisco. Funny incident with unemployed actor helping her get motorcycle up YMCA steps; finally gets a letter from Tom and mail-i-gram from Matt. She waits and waits for Matt; they don’t connect; She spends time with children (a sign) at campsite in Redwoods; then makes decision to detour and return to Tom on her way home. She starts writing the prose for The Lady and the Hawk children’s story. Full speed ahead. Picks up letter from Tom at Seattle Post Office.
Transformational Characters: Trish learns about spiritual things from Matt, the Grand Canyon and in Death Valley; and the LA boys learn from Trish’s wisdom that they shouldn’t expect adventure to be handed to them. Life is of their own making-an odyssey, not a guided tour.
Old Ways: still moving along with her solid upbringing and intentions of seeing the country, but now recognizing the greater value of learning from people’s lives. Tom and Matt in the picture, has become Tom and his children.
The Vision: seeing all the sites on her way back to spend time with and learn from Tom and his children.
Challenge: the quest of seeing the country and Tom, and dealing with her Head vs Heart and freedom vs home & family issues.
Weaknesses: vulnerability of being in love; fear of unknowns in outlaw matters; and physical demands of speeding up her trip–450 motorcycling miles a day for 10 days straight.
MM #7 – Pages 90 – 105 – The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and he rejoins the battle with a new fervor, finally turning the tables on his antagonist and arriving at apparent victory. And then the tables turn one more time!
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
Canadian border officials search all of her gear and take her bear spray ‘paralyzer’; She travels on ferry and rides with Lords Motorcycle Gang. Andy befriends her; the script circles around and repeats the opening scene at a Montana gas station-but we now know what ‘home’ she’s heading back to. She meets and is awed by the Mythic Motorcycle Man (a wise old rider-dusty from the road-she will become someday). Then has female talk with hiking Heidi, her roommate (considering starting a family) at a Teton hostel (freedom vs settling down); Then a Bear attacks her camp (no bear spray); She calls Tom so he knows she’s on her way to meet his children; She rides the boring Interstate with Pete a very cute Sturgis Rally stunt rider. She’s exhausted but not allowed to stay at the Sioux Falls hostel (men only); so travels 2 hours in dark to hostel run by retired nuns in Omaha. They bless her and she’s on her way. Picks up Kansas City letter from Tom; Almost home to Natchez.
Transformational Characters: Trish learns that motorcycle gang individuals are not necessarily to be feared, and need to be members of a gang for strength. Andy the gang leader learns that it feels good to be nice to Trish and overcomes the peer pressure of pleasing the gang. The gas station attendant is inspired at how far she is away from home. Trish was an oddity at the time. Women were rarely seen on motorcycles in 1979, no less traveling cross country solo with a tent and sleeping bag on the back. People were captivated and thrilled at the time. She was a symbol of freedom, adventure, the pioneer spirit and the United States.
Old Ways: still moving along seeing the country and learning from people’s lives with her home grown grounded personality and values intact-using what she’s been learning as she continues to travel along.
The Vision: heading back to see Tom and meet his children and enjoy Natchez.
Challenge: the quest of seeing everything she initially set out to see plus detouring to Natchez, MS. Still dealing with her Head vs Heart concerning the marijuana issue.
Weaknesses: vulnerability of being in love; fear of unknown in outlaw matter; irresponsibly traveling too may miles and fast to get back to Natchez.
MM #8 – Pages 105 – 120 – to end. The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat him, wraps up his story and any sub-plots, and moves into the new world he and his story have created.
Turning Point: New status quo.
Experiences all of the family life with Tom, his friend Ed, and the children; Reads The Lady and the Hawk children’s story; Then things start falling apart: discrimination against blacks; unrelatable Southern women; hellish marijuana activity; the heat and humidity.
She hates to leave Tom, Ed and the children but has to get back to her Harvard job. She returns home with a much richer understanding of life.
At this point the three story lines play off each other-contrasting and/or supporting. (1) The past-trials and errors of teaching herself to ride her first motorcycle-the Twinstar; (2) The 1979 trip-riding the Hawk onto the Interstate heading home changed; and (3) her present senior self. After going through all her trip memorabilia and life experiences in the attic, buys a new Honda Shadow, gives the Mythic Motorcycle Man salute to a new young rider; and rides off for a new adventure-possibly to track down Tom after finding his phone number (call whenever) in the pocket of her old leather jacket. Each of the three story lines ends in a different stage of life on a different bike.
Transformational Characters: Trish learns-although she is charmed by and has learned from the novelty of her Mississippi family experience, there are too many differences and her Old World responsibilities for her to ever consider staying there. She retains her ‘Old World’ upbringing and values with new knowledge of other lives that she can enrichen her own. She’s got to be less of an overachiever and enjoy life more. The Mississippians are inspired and learn as well, that there is another ‘livelihood’ out there beyond their beliefs and experiences.
By looking back on and reliving her travels and life, present day senior Trish reinspires and heals herself as she once inspired others; and regains the strength to make the most of her next stage in life. Her sons have learned from her and charted their own independent adventurous lives. And they are now encouraging her to get out on the road again, as retired senior, while she still can.
Old Ways: She never stopped moving along with her initial intentions of seeing the country. But she learned about people and their lives and more about her own values and life.
NEW WAY:
The Vision: Trish is looking ahead wanting to make the most out of her remaining years -but with more balance. Yes she has become ‘the old lady with stories to tell’, but she’s not yet stopped gathering material. There is still more juice out of life to be squeezed.
Challenge: keeping balance in her life-Head vs Heart and Freedom vs Home; and applying what she learned in her travels to her life. Live, Learn and RENEW.
<b class=””>Weaknesses: staying on track…and allowing herself to be less of an overachiever and enjoy a more balanced life. Not easy for her to do. She still makes a to-do-list for everyday, but gives herself a week to do it.
NOTE:
A few flashbacks to relevant childhood incidents and bits of the present senior story line need to be inserted into the script on an as needed basis.
Childhood: Born in a factory town with 5 younger brothers, dealing with sex discrimination and a devastating malady, Trish defies the odds and studies and works her way up to a teaching and designing position at Harvard.
Senior: A tired, once vibrant, professional woman reconnects with her spirit and sons telling captivating, perilous and humorous stories of her past motorcycle travels.
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Chris Cornelius’ Transformational Structure
What I learned doing this assignment is: There are so many varied scenes and adventures here, I need to be selective with the main 1979 motorcycle trip stories and insert flashbacks to her upbringing and scenes from the present, on a strictly as-needed-basis.
1. Tell us your Transformational Logline.
Based on a true story: A tired, once vibrant northern city girl reconnects with her spirit and sons telling captivating, perilous and humorous stories from her 1979 motorcycle odyssey when she fell in love with a man raising two young children and marijuana on a farm in Mississippi.
2. Main character: Trish
Change Agent: Tom, Matt and others
Transformational Character(s): Trish and some of the characters she meets
3. List out your Mini-Movie structure:
This is the Main 1979 cross-country trip story line with flashbacks and present scenes yet to be inserted where needed.
I reached a stage in life called ‘downsizing’ when I had to look back before going forward.
MM #1 – Pages 1 – 15 – Our hero’s status quo, his ordinary world, ends with an inciting incident or “call to adventure,” introducing the story’s main tension.
Turning Point: Call to Adventure
Trish leaves her family, friends and job teaching costume and set design at Harvard for the summer, and despite some emotional and physical drawbacks, makes it to NYC and meets the first character in her travels, an impressed Wall Street Broker who wants to follow her .
MM #2 – Pages 15 – 30 – Our hero’s denial of the call, and his gradually being “locked into” the conflict brought on by this call.
Turning Point: Locked in.
Trish visits her former undergraduate roommate in Washington, sees the sites, then meets up with motorcycling James (from Boston) so they can safely travel through Easy Rider country–leaving more of the ‘Old World’ behind. They meet an undertaker that specializes in accident victims (gate keeper) who reminds her of what is important to her in her old world before entering the other world of the trip, where she meets and falls in love with motorcycle mechanic Tom-raising two young children and marijuana on a farm in Natchez, MS–Huge game changer.
MM #3 – Pages 30 – 45 – Our hero’s first attempts to solve his problem, the first things that anyone with this problem would try, appealing to outside authority to help him. Ends when all these avenues are shut to our hero.
Turning Point: Standard ways fail.
Trish and Tom enjoy the novelty of each other (gun target practice, riding three-wheelers); The marijuana conflict arises; Trish reluctantly continues her travels; and she (brokenhearted over Tom) and James celebrate 4th of July in New Orleans; then go their separate ways, as planned, in Southern Texas.
MM #4 – Pages 45 — 60 – Our hero spawns a bigger plan. He prepares for it, gathers what materials and allies he may need, then puts the plan into action — only to have it go horribly wrong, usually due to certain vital information the hero lacked about the forces of antagonism allied against him.
Turning Point: Plan backfires.
Trish survives her worst day (physically and emotionally sick, hot, and out of gas-her trip sabotaged by her heart); rescued by a wise, jazzy, Deus Ex Machina man driving a Cadillac. She then has a Big Bend adventure with 3 Viet Nam Veterans-the older brothers she never had; a bizarre, other worldly Austin gazebo rain incident with sculpture student from the university; she calls Tom from busy rest area. He’s not home. In the Boulder hostel she meets Midwestern traveling girls with head vs heart issues, and ex-con imprisoned 5 yrs for transporting pot. Trish is not allowed to get Tom’s general delivery letter on a Saturday at the PO. It’s forwarded to San Francisco; She calls Tom again from Continental Divide and he’s not ‘the home body he said he was.’
MM #5 – Pages 60 — 75 – Having created his plan to solve his problem WITHOUT changing, our hero is confronted by his need to change, eyes now open to his own weaknesses, driven by the antagonist to change or die. He retreats to lick his wounds.
Turning Point: The decision to change.
Sick, Trish meets, is sheltered, and recovers with spiritual Aspen, engineer, cocaine dealer Matt. She calls Tom from a bar in town and they finally connect. He says, ‘You really need to travel with someone.’ Trish hangs out with Matt and his former girlfriend and her new boyfriend-Matt’s best friend. Matt buys a motorcycle and plans to meet Trish in San Francisco in two weeks.
MM #6 – Pages 75 – 90 – Our hero spawns a new plan, but now he’s ready to change. He puts this plan into action…and is very nearly destroyed by it. And then…a revelation.
Turning Point: The ultimate failure.
Trish leaves Aspen, then meets Soulmate jeweler Joe Bones in converted school bus in Telluride. They share their art. Trish has accident trying to jump a wash in the desert with her bike. Unconscious she flashes back to a tricycle accident she had as a child. A sport bike rider mysteriously comes out from the dark woods behind her and rescues her from riding on the slippery wet gravel to the Grand Canyon North Rim Lodge. She runs out of gas and coasts back to her tent. She travels through Las Vegas, then heads into a fiery orange sunset to Death Valley. The Hawk fails in the hot dark night in the desert. It cools down and starts up. In morning she’s suffering from casino smorgasbord food poisoning. Then a little amusing dog distributes her dirty laundry all over the campground. She takes off for the Pacific where she celebrates and offers wisdom to two bored LA boys.
She tours Hollywood, then up the coast to San Francisco. Funny incident with unemployed actor trying to get motorcycle up YMCA steps; finally gets a letter from Tom and mailigram from Matt. She waits and waits for Matt; they don’t connect; She spends time with children at campsite in Redwoods; then makes decision to detour and return to Tom on her way home. She starts writing the prose for The Lady and the Hawk children’s story. Full speed ahead. Picks up letter from Tom at Seattle Post Office.
MM #7 – Pages 90 – 105 – The revelation allows our hero to see victory, and he rejoins the battle with a new fervor, finally turning the tables on his antagonist and arriving at apparent victory. And then the tables turn one more time!
Turning Point: Apparent victory.
Canadian border officials search all of her gear and take her bear spray ‘paralyzer’. She travels on ferry and rides with the Lords Motorcycle Gang; the script circles around and repeats the opening scene at a Montana gas station-but we now know what ‘home’ she’s heading back to. She meets and is awed by the Mythic Motorcycle Man (a wise old rider- dusty from the road-she will become someday). Then has heartfelt (freedom vs settling down) talk with hiking Heidi, her roommate at a Teton hostel; Then a Bear attacks her camp (no bear spray). She calls Tom so he knows she’s on her way to meet his children. She rides the boring Interstate with Pete a very cute Sturgis Rally stunt rider. She’s exhausted but not allowed to stay at the Sioux Falls hostel (men only); so travels 2 hours in dark to hostel run by retired nuns in Omaha. Picks up Kansas City letter from Tom-almost home to Natchez.
MM #8 – Pages 105 – 120 – The hero puts down the antagonist’s last attempt to defeat him, wraps up his story and any sub-plots, and moves into the new world he and his story have created.
Turning Point: New status quo.
Trish experiences all of the family life with Tom, his friend Ed, and the children. She reads The Lady and the Hawk children’s story she wrote. Then things start falling apart: discrimination against blacks; unrelatable Southern women; hellish marijuana activity; the heat and humidity.
She hates to leave Tom, Ed and the children but has to get back to her Harvard job. She runs out of gas on the Natchez Trace and her tank is filled up by a forman and some prisoners that are cutting back the roadside kudzu.
At this point the three story lines play off each other more intensely with contrast and/or support. (1) The past-trials and errors of teaching herself to ride her first motorcycle-the Twinstar; (2) The 1979 trip-riding the Hawk onto the Interstate heading home changed; and (3) her present senior self.
After going through all her trip memorabilia and life experiences in the attic, and feeling renewed and empowered when she puts on her leathers, she buys a new Honda Twinstar; gives the Mythic Motorcycle Man salute to a new young rider; and rides off for a new adventure-possibly to track down Tom after finding his phone number in the pocket of her old jacket-‘call whenever,’ or maybe just out for a joyride before returning home to cook supper.
Each of the three story lines ends in a different stage of life, on a different bike.
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Christine’s Three Gradients
What I learned doing this assignment is: I can go through these gradients MANY times in Trish’s travels. Almost on a daily basis. And although the entire cross country trip was a desired change, the unexpected challenges she’s confronted with along the way have forced many changes if she is to survive.
What is the Emotional Gradient you’ll use?
Overall: Desired Change.
Excitement: A: inspiration and planning; B: preparations; C: leaving home and friends /letting go
Doubt: A: unexpected challenges on short trip from Cambridge (work) to home (CT); B. family and friends raise fears at intervention; C: she considers possibility of never making it back home from trip / inexperience
Hope: A: grandmother’s support–take it one day at a time; B: she starts trip–people give her a thumbs up–homeless man says ‘this is going to change your life; C: breaks away / has had lots of challenging experiences in life but this is a new one
Discouragement: A: first unexpected drawback–cross winds on highway to NYC; B: has to pull over (coincidentally near ‘Welcome to New York’ sign); C: wind on road / never before experienced travelling with a such a huge amount of gear on bike
Courage: A: ‘Welcome to New York’ road sign re-inspires her; B: gets back on road; C: must make it to NYC / forget about big picture and take it one day at a time
Triumph: A: makes it to New York City; B: arrives at New Jersey Ho Jo; C: first encounter–impressed Wall Street broker that validates her success / her butt hurts.
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Chris Cornelius’ Lead Characters.
What I learned doing this assignment is: with three story lines moving along together I may have to focus more on the characters in the trip story line and change my logline.
1. Tell us your transformational journey logline.
A tired, once vibrant, professional woman reconnects with her spirit and sons telling captivating, perilous and humorous stories of her past motorcycle travels.
Born in a factory town with 5 younger brothers and and dealing with sex discrimination and a devastating malady, Trish defies the odds and studies and works her way up to a teaching and designing position at Harvard.
Inspired to travel her first summer off from school and work, Trish meets many challenges in her quest– a 15000 mile cross country motorcycle odyssey.
2. Tell us who you think might be your Change Agent and give a few sentences about how that character fits the role.
The change agent is the cast of characters and varied experiences Trish has on her journey
They each profoundly affect her head, heart, body and soul in some way.
Heart: Tom the Natchez, MS marijauna growing mechanic and his children steal Trish’s heart and threaten the enjoyment and continuation of her cross country quest.
Spirit: Wes the Aspen mechanical engineer cocaine dealer who buys a bike and plans to meet her in San Francisco and join her in her travels. He’s lived a lot of life. Considers her some kind of sign that he needs to change his life.
Soul: Joe Bones, designer of stones, a jeweler who lives and works in a converted school bus and shares his art with Trish.
Head: Larry the mortician who specializes in accident victims and makes Trish think about what’s important to her before she enters the other world challenges of her travels.
Possibly also James… her motorcycling companion through the south.
3. Tell us who you think might be your Transformable Character(s) and give a few sentences about how that character or characters fit the role.
The lady is the transformable character.
In addition, some of the people she meets transform—-Wes, Tom
And if this movie is a blockbuster hit it has the potential to unify this nation, improve the world’s view of the USA, and get us all inspired to zoom off into a positive future..
She has some fears about taking the journey / It is an over achievers’ type of vacation / Dangerous.
Will she even survive it?
4. Tell us who or what you think might be The Oppression and give a few sentences about how The Oppression works in your story.
The challenges of the trip, the quest, the unknown, constantly demands a response.
The love interest, Tom, and her own heart that wants to abandon her quest and be with him.
Her own learned upbringing that conflicts with some of her experiences… but also gets her through some.
Divine intervention and Karma help her.
Everything gives her more life experience that help her meet the challenges of and enrichen her life.
5. Tell us who you think might be your Betraying Character and give a few sentences about how that character fits the role.
Possibly her own head and common sense that wouldn’t let her heart have its way and remain in Mississippi with an outlaw.
Or Wes…who tries to get her to continue adventuring rather than explore the possibilities of settling down.
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Chris Cornelius’ Transformational Journey
“What I learned doing this assignment is:
A framework (skeleton) for this screenplay is being developed that will make it easier to decide which stories to cut, keep and add to accomplish its mission.
Tell us your logline for the transformational journey.
There are 3 story lines for the lady in the ‘Lady and the Hawk’ that progress simultaneously; each ending on a different motorcycle.
The childhood journey: from growing up in a 5-room factory town apartment with her 5 younger brothers (fighting sex discrimination and health issues); to teaching design and technical theater at Harvard University and getting her first motorcycle.
The 1979 cross-country motorcycle journey: from sheltered college/extended family/city girl world; to a far greater developed head/ heart/ body and soul woman returning home on the Hawk motorcycle.
The midlife crisis journey: from empty nest/losses/downsizing/looking back; to zooming off into the future to collect more stories to tell on a new motorcycle.
Logline:
A tired, once vibrant, professional woman reconnects with her spirit and sons telling captivating, perilous and humorous stories of her past motorcycle travels.
Tell us what you see as the Old Ways.
Victim of sex discrimination/health issues/and an inexperienced sheltered college, extended family, city girl world with an undeveloped head/heart/body/and soul.
Tell us what you see as the New Ways.
Healed/compassionate/energized/experienced head heart body and soul.
There is also the potential for this ‘mission’ to become a ‘movement’ that could change the world.
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Chris Cornelius’ First Three Decisions
“What I learned doing this assignment is: that I need to re-inspire myself every now and then with the story of this movie. So now I just need to make it do the same for everyone else.”
1. WHAT IS YOUR PROFOUND TRUTH?
Life is an odyssey………. not a guided tour.
My dream has always been to be an old lady with entertaining stories to tell.
Gravestone, “She squeezed all the juice out of life.”
2. WHAT IS THE CHANGE YOU WANT AN AUDIENCE TO MAKE?
To leave inspired to find something, uniquely theirs, to do with their life that will make them feel the way motorcycling has made me feel.
3. THE ENTERTAINMENT VEHICLE IS: THE EMBELLISHED AS IT HAPPENED.
The various stages of a woman’s life story told through her motorcycle travels.
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What I learned from doing this assignment is: my own script, written 20 years ago, lends itself to this module. This assignment offers guidance in what to cut, keep and add in the process of updating it. I will not be spending a lot of time writing out lengthy answers to assignment questions [been dealing with a lot of other detailed writing]. For me it will have to be jotting down my notes.
What is the CHANGE this movie is about? What is the Transformational Journey of this movie?
1. Phil transitions from being an obnoxious, self-centered, unhappy man to a considerate, out-going, happy character with everything to live for
2. Rita is the Chang Agent. Phil is the Transformable Character. The Oppression is the repetition of the days.
3. Most people can relate in some capacity to weather forecasts , alarm clocks and boredom at work. Blowing the clouds in the forecast is profound and clever/cute and raises curiosity.
Phil and Rita’s tension/banter/contrasting personalities is a hook. What will happen?
Everyone relates to Ground Hog Day and many enjoy road trips.
4. Phil is changed the most–from totally disenchanted with life… to totally enchanted/smitten.
Rita is optimistic / totally nice / supportive / single. She ends up finding a partner in Phil, who has actually learned to be nice to her, from her.
5. The gradient of change is the progress/growth (emotional/psychological) Phil makes in dealing with his oppressing predicament.
6. obnoxious / self centered / mistreating people/ rejecting colleagues
fear raised by the repetition starts eroding his confidence
Bad Karma is getting him (snow / puddle /cold shower)
He starts using his predicament to manipulate people
But is still tortured to the point of suicide attempts.
He learns compassion from his own pain and panic
He begins to genuinely help people.
And becomes a better person trying to appeal to Rita.
7. Most profound moments:
When Phil realizes he longer has to live with the bad choices he makes and can do whatever he wants.
He skips the broadcast and confides in Rita.
Rita’s Sir Walter Scott quote
He concludes he’s a god
says he’s loved Rita all along
8. Most profound lines:
“How’s tomorrow for you?”
“Why can’t it be a better day?”
“My years are not advancing as fast as you might think.”
He’s a god, not The God.
9. Ending payoffs setups.
Phil’s trials have all been resolved and he’s a much better person from having gone through them. Through Rita’s influence Phil has actually grown to be an answer to her needs/desires/dreams.
10. Profound truth
Life’s challenges are an opportunity for growth. And things can change in an instant.
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I agree.
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to the terms of this release form.
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Christine Cornelius
MemberApril 20, 2021 at 1:37 pm in reply to: Opening Teleconference – What did you learn?There are a lot of levels on which to enjoy and appreciate entertainment that largely depends on the viewer’s own life experience, personality and at what stage they are in their life. The ride I take my audience on needs to hook them at their level so that it can take them to the next.
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A. Christine Cornelius-Ms.
B. Two
C. Motorcycled 15,000 miles solo cross-country in 1979
D. Script needs updating and guidance in what to cut and what to keep.