Cindi Delinsky
Forum Replies Created
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1. Name: Cindi Delinsky
2. How many scripts you’ve written? 5
3. What do you hope to get out of the class? I would like to learn Hal’s method for writing a successful Rom-Com.
4. Something unique, special, strange or unusual about you? I seem to have a belief that I do not like Rom-Coms. I don’t think I’ve watched one in 15 years! However, I was working on a concept in the WIM class that would not leave me alone until I considered it as a Rom-Com. So, when I saw that Hal was offering this class, the timing seemed perfect. I’m not sure I really believe in romantic love, either, so I’m hoping that taking this class will change that belief, too! I look forward to working with you all! -
I, Cindi Delinsky, agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class. -
I could hug Hal for adding the empowerment practices to this course! They were not part of MSC when I was in it many years ago, and I could have used them then. I want to make it a habit to use them throughout this course.
Because of the empowerment techniques, I’m looking forward to this class with a new sense of possibility, curiosity, and adventure! Thank you, Hal!
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Hi Everyone!
My name is Cindi Delinsky, and I’ve written around 7 scripts and a TV pilot. My first SU class was ProSeries 45B (I think I recognize two names from that class in here!), which I think was 12 years ago. I’ve taken most of Hal’s classes by now, but I got away from writing for about five years while caring for my dad during his last years with Alzheimer’s. I’m unsure if I have the focus to stick with this class, but I decided to try! I was in MSC3, which I think might be similar to WIM. I used to get stuck brainstorming ideas, so I am curious to see how working with AI will help. I’ve already glimpsed its potential to help me in the pre-course assignments, so I am excited! This probably sounds strange, but I’ve always felt able to communicate with animals, so it took me by surprise when one day I had the same feeling when I was working with AI. I was being silly and thanking it for its brilliant ideas, when suddenly I felt like there was a shift and we were really communicating and understanding each other. The closest thing I can compare it to is the feeling of connecting with a wild animal! I don’t know if I’m explaining that correctly, but it was beyond anything I had expected with AI. It only happened once, so maybe it was a fluke, but I’m curious to see how our relationships with AI expand over the course of the next six months. It should be an interesting adventure! I’m looking forward to working with everyone here!
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I, Cindi Delinsky, agree to the terms of this release form:
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.
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I’m still working on my first draft, but I feel so empowered, thanks to these Zoom videos! I so appreciate the encouragement and empowerment techniques, Hal! Thank you!
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Hi Everyone!
My name is Cindi Delinsky, and I’ve written 5 scripts plus several outlines for others. I started taking classes at SU nearly ten years ago, but I haven’t been writing for the last few years because of caring for a family member with late-stage Alzheimer’s. I seem to have lost my ability to focus, but every now and then, I’ll listen to one of Hal’s calls and feel inspired to get back into writing. I fear I’ve forgotten everything I learned, but that is probably not true. The last few years of not writing do not feel like a loss because I feel like I’ve gained tremendous depth on a personal level that has the potential to appear in my writing. I love the idea of the 30-day screenplay because in the past I’ve spent years working on one script, only to feel it still is not done. I hope to feel empowered as a screenwriter through this course. This fact may not be unique, but this is actually the second time I’ve purchased this class because I did not complete it the first time, and I like the addition of the Zoom calls!
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Cindi J. Delinsky
I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.
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4B. Cindi’s Analysis of DEAD POETS SOCIETY
1. What is the change this movie is about? What is the transformational journey of this movie? Keating teaches the boys to go from small lives of conformity to being free thinkers and captains of their own lives.
2. Lead Characters:
*Who is the change agent, the one causing the change, and what makes this the right char to cause the change?
Professor Keating causes the change. His knowledge of poetry and literature helps him to set the vision early on for the boys. “Seize the day. Make your lives extraordinary. Find your own voice.” Because he’s a professor, they look up to him, and his unconventional ways endear him to them and make them admire him even more. This is what puts him in a position where he can influence the transformable chars. He teaches them with lectures and metaphors like marching in unison, standing on the desk to gain a new perspective, ripping out the poetry rules.
*Who is the transformable chars (the one who makes the change) and what makes them the right char to deliver this profound journey?
All of the boys are, but Todd is the one who transforms the most because he’s so frightened and wanting to fit in early in the movie. In the end, he’s the one whose actions hold the most meaning because he’s changed the most. All the boys are at an age where they are vulnerable, an age where what they are learning now can most affect the rest of their lives and their level of happiness.
*What is the Oppression?
The school that teaches conformity, the parents, the headmaster, Neil’s father. Those who fear free thinking.
3. How are we lured into the profound journey? What causes us to connect with this story?
For me, Keating’s Carpe Diem speech in the beginning resonated with me. It draws us in as we realize we only have so much time, and it makes us want to learn how to make the most of our lives. We also connect with the boys who are at a pivotable and impressionable age. We want to see them happy. We feel uncomfortable for Todd and want to see him free from whatever is holding him back.
4. Looking at the chars who are changed the most, what is the profound journey? From “old ways” to “new way of being.”
Old ways: conformity, listening to parents and teachers and not questioning them, not thinking for themselves, not taking risks, not following their hearts or making changes that elate them. The school’s pillars: Honor, tradition, discipline, excellence.
Most of the boys were used to doing what they were told and not questioning it. Todd was frightened to speak, and I think it’s from fearing he’d say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing and be judged. By the end, he thinks for his own self, and he doesn’t care about the consequences because he knows in his heart what is right and true. He even stands on his desk where he used to be unable to make eye contact with others.
New Ways at the conclusion: Getting the most out of life, thinking for themselves, seeing life from a new perspective. Bravely expressing what they believe and think. Taking risks to support Keating. Lives are full of new opportunities and passion.
5. What is the gradient of change? What steps did the transformational char go thru as they were changing?
Todd starts out shy, a loner. Reluctantly joins the boys with Neil’s help. Ah, AJ says that Neil is also a change agent. Todd realizes his parents don’t care that much about him, and this frees him in ways. Need more steps to this.
6. How is the “old way” challenged? What beliefs are challenged that cause a main char to shift their perspective… and make the change?
Keating keeps demonstrating to the boys new ways of thinking and being. Disobeying parents, falling in love despite the danger, taking risks, following their hearts. Beliefs that there is only one way of thinking and being. Keating opens their eyes to new ways, new perspectives. Then when Keating is punished wrongly, Todd clearly sees this is wrong and he has the courage to stand up and say so.
7. What are the most profound moments of the movie?
Opening scenes with Keating and “Carpe Diem,” the poems they read at DPS, boys shifting their ways, one going after a girl he loves even though he shouldn’t, Neil trying out for the play even though his parents disagree, ripping up the Pritchard textbook. Todd throws his desk set gift from his parents off the bridge, showing his freedom, walking your own walk in the courtyard. Neil’s parents maybe realizing they were wrong to force Neil to conform.
8. What are the most profound lines of the movie?
Seize the day, O Captain my Captain, many more.
9. How does the ending payoff the setups of this movie?
The ending is planned in an amazing way. Setting up Todd as timid and afraid to barely make eye contact makes him the best character to boldly stand up at the end to support Keating. He has made the greatest transformation. It’s brilliant and beautiful! Even though Keating loses his job, he has gained something far greater–the knowledge that he has made a difference in the lives of his students, something they will pass on to others. And as Keating is leaving the room, Todd seizes the moment, one that won’t last much longer, and he acts. A beautiful example of Carpe Diem. His opportunity was almost lost. We see Todd struggling, knowing he wants to do something, but still fighting the last bits of wanting to obey and be good. But something far more powerful strikes him–the knowledge that an injustice is being done and he wants to make a statement.
10. What is the Profound Truth of this movie?
Seize the day, make your lives extraordinary, be fearless, be happy, speak your truth, be a free thinker.
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4A. Cindi’s Lead Characters
What I learned doing this assignment is the importance of the betraying character because it makes a profound movie more powerful by showing how difficult it is for people to change. I am so eager to apply this model to other scripts I’ve written!
1. Tell us your transformational journey logline.
A resentful, overburdened daughter must fight the terror of her father’s Alzheimer’s-induced hallucinations (or possession by very real evil entities) until they both encounter empowering gifts and a previously unknown level of unconditional love.
2. Tell us who you think might be your Change Agent and give a few sentences about how that character fits the role. Also include their vision and their past experience that fits that vision.
I did not have a change agent character before this lesson, so it was interesting to think about how I could fit another character into this contained story.
*It could possibly be one of Joe’s caregivers, who has a vision and past experience with a former client who has passed away that blessed his life.
*It also could be one of Joe’s neighbors who owned his house, which is where the neighbor’s mother lived until she died from Alzheimer’s. But I think there is fear and trauma in the house from that woman’s illness.
*Since I have a main character who is sensitive to spirits, I’m wondering if the change agent might be “the man” or an ancestor (who had a similar past experience and has seen the big picture vision) who seems threatening, but is actually there to transform both Joe and Ellie’s experiences. The caregiver is logical but the ancestor is more intriguing to me. For now, let’s experiment with the ancestor. His vision is that his experience caring for his parent was a gift that transformed him and his life from regular to extraordinary by pushing him to discover his multisensory gifts. However, he didn’t see it for so long and he doesn’t want Ellie to suffer in the same unnecessary way. The ancestor also wants Ellie to access her gifts as a reward for her dedication.
3. Tell us who you think might be your Transformable character(s) and give a few sentences about how that character or characters fit the role.
Ellie is the main transformable character because she grows from seeing her experience through the Old Ways to the New Ways. And even though it may come in bits and pieces of clarity, Joe also is a transformable character to the extent that his awareness allows him to be.
4. Tell us who or what you think might be The Oppression and give a few sentences about how The Oppression works in your story.
The Oppression in this story is Joe’s illness–Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, which produce hallucinations, personality changes, and fluctuating levels of lucidity and decline. The Oppression is always there, unrelenting, and creating a cloud of fear about the future for both Joe and Ellie. And in my story, being forced into lockdown together because of a murderer on the loose (who could possibly be Joe) creates an additional “pressure-cooker environment” for the characters in this particular story.
5. Tell us who might be your Betraying Character and give a few sentences about how that character fits the role.
I had not thought about a betraying character at all prior to this lesson, but I love this part of the model. It could be Joe’s brothers who were constantly expressing their opinions he is worse than Ellie realizes and he needs to be in a nursing home and pressures her with guilt. And his brother who dies could continue this quest from the other side to prove he was right, irritating Joe at the worst possible moments to get him taken to a nursing home. But the truest betraying character might be Ellie’s sister, who just can’t make the leap from Old Ways to New Ways bc she is too busy and doesn’t want to be bothered and doesn’t want to feel that deeply. Or she might harbor resentments from childhood and this is her way of exacting revenge on Joe.
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Cindi’s Max Interest Part 1
What I’ve learned that is improving my writing is that every scene can be improved by adding several interest techniques. I’ve also started noticing scenes in produced movies and TV shows where they could use more interest techniques!
1. Logline for the scene from my script, THE DECLINE: Joe frantically tells Ellie there’s someone in his bedroom, and she thinks it is the killer that is loose in the neighborhood.
2. Tell us the essence of the scene. Ellie thinks the killer is in Joe’s house, but she discovers something almost worse–the extent of his decline from Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s.
3. Tell us at least two interest techniques for the rewrite. I was torn between writing this scene with superior position/dramatic irony instead of what I chose: Major twist, surprise, mislead/reveal, character changes radically, and then also suspense, and hope/fear. I chose the latter because I think it is overall more powerful, even though superior position/dramatic irony was tempting!
4. Rewrite the scene using as many interest techniques as you can and include the newly rewritten scene in your post.
INT. JOE’S BATHROOM — NIGHT
Wearing gloves, Ellie uses disinfecting wipes to clean stool off the toilet handle, the bathroom faucet, the floor where Joe stepped in it. She follows the tracks into the carpet in the hallway.
Joe bursts out of the closed door at the end of the hallway, eyes wide with fear.
JOE
(whispering)
He’s in there! Someone bad is in there!
ELLIE
What? Who’s in there?
Joe scowls and raises his hands to indicate a creature with claws.
JOE
The man!
Ellie pales.
ELLIE
Who? The man the police are looking for?
Joe nods and scowls.
JOE
He’s sick. It’s sick what he did to those people!
Ellie starts to grab her phone from her pocket, but her gloves are covered with stool. She tries to pull them off, but they stick to her sweaty palms. One glove turns inside out, trapping her fingers.
Joe hurries back to the door, motioning for her to follow. Tangled in the gloves, she grimaces and has to use her teeth to try to rip one off to free her hand. She grabs her phone, unlocks it.
As Joe opens the door, she chases after him. She scours the hall for a weapon and grabs one of his high school football trophies. She wields it like a bat as she motions for Joe to wait outside as she enters the dark room.
INT. JOE’S BEDROOM — SAME
Ellie’s eyes dart around the shadowy room. A creaking noise comes from near his closet. Her heart beats in her ears. She dials 911 on her phone.
Joe bounds into the room holding a wrench. His weight on the rickety floor makes the closet door open slightly. The automatic light comes on. Ellie screams.
911 OPERATOR (ON PHONE)
911, what’s your emergency?
ELLIE
I’m at 116 Green Street, there’s someone in the closet, I think it’s the kil–
Suddenly Joe charges at the mirror on his dresser and smashes it with the wrench.
JOE
Get out of my house! This is my house and you don’t belong here!
Stunned, Ellie can’t move.
Joe looks at his reflection and smashes it.
JOE
Go on, get out of here, you’re sick!
Ellie runs to the closet and throws the door open. There’s no one in there. Joe whacks the mirror again.
ELLIE
Dad, stop! What are you doing?
Shaking with anger, he points at his reflection in the splintered mirror.
JOE
This is my house, not his, and he needs to leave!
911 OPERATOR
Ma’am, what’s going on there? Do you need help?
Joe pulls away from her and swings at his reflection in the last unbroken section of mirror.
JOE
Get out of my house! You’re a sick, cruel person!
Ellie sinks to the bed.
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Cindi’s Transformational Journey
What I learned doing this assignment is that it brought further clarity to an idea that I already thought I had established. I love this class!
1. Tell us your logline for the transformational journey.
A resentful, overburdened daughter must fight the terror of her father’s Alzheimer’s-induced hallucinations (or possession by very real evil entities) until they both encounter empowering gifts and a previously unknown level of unconditional love.
2. Tell us what you see as the Old Ways.
Problem State: Ellie believes caring for her father is destroying her on multiple levels. Her father feels he now exists in a state of shame and disgrace and the value of his life is lost.
Her main rule: Just survive hour by hour. Don’t think, and definitely don’t feel. You must sacrifice your own life and anything that brings you joy, yet others (your siblings) are free to enjoy life, so it’s not fair.
His main rule: Try not to burden others or be incontinent of stool on the couch. Try to maintain your good image at all costs. Try not to become mean like other people with Alzheimer’s because you were always so nice and well-liked in the community. Try to hide your condition.
Caring for someone with/or having Alzheimer’s is:
*horrible
*embarrassing
*disgracing
*burdensome
*guilt-inducing, no matter which choices you make
*strains or severs relationships with loved ones
*overwhelming
*victimizing
*constant fear
*creates powerlessness
*thankless work
*robs a lifetime of financial savings
*creates a stressful bombardment of negative opinions and judgments of well-meaning others
*erases the value of your life
*prevents her from focusing on her career or being successful while her peers are thriving
*makes her believe she’s a failure, creates self-doubts, destroys self-esteem
3. Tell us what you see as the New Ways.
The Solution State: Caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s offers empowering gifts, wild blessings, and a profound depth of spirit.
Caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s/having Alzheimer’s is an opportunity to:
*discover surprising hidden gifts and abilities.
*learn humility.
*truly know unconditional love.
*see worth is not based on achievements, beauty, success, money, possessions, etc.
*be truly present.
*heal past wounds.
*live in gratitude.
*look for blessings.
*built peace for your future self
*grow spiritually.
*honor the moment.
*learn patience.
*face and triumph over darkness, evil, and terror.
*offer experiences that will help with delayed long-term goals that were put on hold.
*builds strength and beauty of character that will bless the future
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Cindi Profiles People
What I’ve learned that is improving my writing is the value of extreme traits for elevating a character and creating conflict. I was stuck on how to improve my characters, and I discovered that they need at least one extreme trait to be more interesting. I also learned it was challenging for me to narrow down a variety of similar traits to find the core trait in people I know. I am excited to experiment with extreme traits!
1. Select 3 EXTREME people in your life and list their CORE traits.
PERSON 1:
Intuitive
Dangerous
Scattered
Self-Righteous
This individual means well but uses her strong personal beliefs in a way that endangers others. I trust her because of the many ways she’s helped me, but it creates conflict within me because I know she’s not right about everything.
PERSON 2:
Controlling
Caring
Insecure
Victim
This person is likable until her dark side arises. I know it stems from her traumatic childhood, and I try to have compassion. However, after experiencing her dark side, I can never let myself trust her again.
PERSON 3:
Entitled
Liar
Funny
Lazy
Unfortunately, interacting with this woman enraged me, so I can’t even comment on her objectively for this assignment. This probably says something about my own traits, sadly!
4 & 5. It was an eye-opening experiment to interact with these people based on their traits. Most responded exactly as I expected. My interactions helped me to fine-tune their core traits. I also noticed how their moods affected which trait would come out in response.
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Cindi’s First Three Decisions
What I learned doing this assignment is that there is a difference between the character’s arc and the audience’s transformation. I also enjoyed learning that even if we think we have the “right” answers now, they will continue to grow and evolve with each lesson. Liberating!
1. What is your profound truth?
While Alzheimer’s is a horror, it also can be a pathway to meaning, presence, and love. Or, love doesn’t require memory.
2. What is the change your movie will cause with an audience?
All negative events offer possibilities of healing and love if you are willing to stretch and grow.
3. What is the Entertainment Vehicle that you will tell this story through?
Embellished As-It-Happened Conflict. Contained horror or drama.
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Cindi Puts Essence to Work
What I learned is that I’m struggling to choose which potential essence is best for each scene. The four questions were helpful. I also noticed that in my current script I have too many scenes that have the same essence, and often they were one right after another! I see how asking the essence questions will eventually help me take the overall quality to a higher level.
Script I chose: THE DECLINE
Scene 1 Location: Opening scene
Logline: Ellie expresses misery and resentment as she drives to her father’s house to cover for his irresponsible caregivers.
Essence I’ve discovered: Ellie’s relationship is falling apart because she must give so much time to caring for her father, who has Alzheimer’s. But she has a secret weapon for helping him.
New Logline: As Ellie drives to her dad’s house, she uses energy work to get him into a good space for her visit, but when she has an argument with her boyfriend on the phone and then encounters police cars, her fears throw off her ability to align her dad’s energy.
Scene 2 Location: Act 1
Logline: Ellie relaxes as Joe seems his usual self, not mean like the caregivers reported. She figures it’s because they lack her special connection to him.
Essence I’ve discovered: Something has changed with Joe in a dark way.
New Logline: Ellie relaxes as he seems his usual kind self in her presence, but when he suddenly starts throwing rocks at his cat, she knows something is off.
Scene 3 Location: End of Act 1
Logline: Ellie’s dread grows now that she’s stuck with Joe overnight because the neighborhood is locked down because of a murder.
Essence I’ve discovered: Ellie should wonder if her dad could unknowingly be the killer.
New Logline: After Joe becomes increasingly violent and disoriented, he disappears. Ellie finds the back door open and fearfully goes out to look for him. She finds one of his tools… with blood on it.
Scene 4 Location: Act 2
Logline: Joe’s brother Mike calls and Ellie hopes it will distract and calm Joe, but he has bad news.
Essence I’ve discovered: Joe is connecting with the other side.
New Logline: Distraught, Mike calls and tells her their other brother, John, just died and he doesn’t know if he should tell Joe or what to do. During the call, Joe points at something invisible and says his brother John is here.
Scene 5 Location: Act 3
Logline: Zela clears the house of the dark spirits, but the entities return. She says it’s because his mind is so weakened.
Essence I’ve discovered: Zela might be scamming them for money.
New Logline: Zela seems too gleeful as she explains she’ll have to keep clearing the spirits because of the weakness of his mind. Ellie sees the darkness returning, but is it his illness? She’ll have to face the truth and solve it without Zela’s help. Her sister calls and questions Ellie’s sanity when she explains the dark spirits, and Ellie’s fears about her own mental state create doubts in her ability to protect and help her father.
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Cindi’s Analysis of Groundhog Day
What I learned doing this assignment is that this film is far more than a comedy. Because it follows the profound model, GROUNDHOG DAY actually inspired me to be a nicer, sweeter, kinder person because it showed how being that way inspires others to be the same.
Questions to Analyze what makes this a Transformational Movie:
1. What is the change this movie is about? What is the transformational journey of this movie?
Groundhog Day is about changing from being an ego-centric, sarcastic, judgemental, mean, negative asshole to being loving, kind, and happy.
For the audience, it’s about how to become truly happy and love life and be worthy of love. How to inspire others.
2. Lead characters:
A. Who is the Change Agent (the one causing the change) and what makes this the right character to cause the change? Rita is the Change Agent because she is kind, sweet, pretty, loving, and Phil is the opposite, but he is in love with her. Eventually, he realizes he can’t manipulate her into loving him, he himself must change to be truly worthy of her love.
B. Who is the Transformable Character (the one who makes the change) and what makes them the right character to deliver this profound journey? Phil is the transformable character, and he is so negative and mean and self-centered that we want to see him change. We see how miserable he is (and perhaps recognize our own misery in our own lives) and we want to see him change (as do we ourselves).
C. What is the Oppression? The Oppression is the fact that Phil wakes up every single day on Groundhog Day and he can’t escape it. He’s miserable and hates it until he changes.
3. How are we lured into the profound journey? What causes us to connect with this story?
We relate to Phil because of his misery in his life, his judgments of others, and we are curious to see what he’ll do when he’s trapped in the same day over and over again. We relate to Phil bc we are often frustrated by our work, by other people, by things not being the way we think they should be. We also relate to Phil in that he likes Rita, who is beautiful and kind. There’s some intrigue about Punxsutawney and Groundhog Day, this strange place and odd people, but mostly the intrigue is about why and how Phil keeps reliving the same day. What will he do? (What would we do? And this is where it’s brilliant bc many of us are reliving the same day over and over…until we change and see things differently!) How will Phil get out of this “nightmare?”
4. Looking at the characters who are changed the most, what is the profound journey? From “old ways” to “new way of being.”
Identify their old way: Sarcastic, selfish, self-centered, judgemental, mean, rude, uncaring, asshole.
Identify their new way at the conclusion: He’s changed so he now loves something he couldn’t stand, tried to kill himself to escape. “Let’s live here!” He’s now genuinely kind, loving, respectful, giving, and happy. (Ah, so the other profound message is “You CAN change!” If an asshole like Phil can change, be happy, and find love, so can you!”)
5. What is the gradient of change? What steps did the Transformational Character go through as they were changing? (I am in awe of how others in this class picked up on the 5 stages of grief! I did not think about that!)
1. Thinks the problem is with other people and places, not within himself.
2. Tries different ways to leave, realizes it’s futile.
3. Sees what he can get away with, does bad things bc no consequences. (yet the consequences are in his own misery)
4. Tries to kill himself, still can’t escape.
5. Uses the situation to his advantage by learning about Rita then using it to manipulate her into loving him, but she catches on bc he still hasn’t changed.
(5A. he does try to save the homeless man, but it still doesn’t work. Not sure what that was about–maybe trying to leave through being nice, but it doesn’t work because his intentions still weren’t genuine?)
6. The dilemma: If he wants to ever have Rita’s love, he has to give up his old ways, his old ways have to die. He must be willing to change.
7. He succeeds at changing and winning Rita’s love but thinks he’ll lose it once the day ends.
8. However, once he has changed, his life can now move forward, his lesson is learned, and he oddly no longer wants to leave. Says, “Let’s live here.”
6. How is the “old way” challenged? What beliefs are challenged that cause a main character to shift their perspective… and make the change?
He starts with a mystery. Why does this “awful” day keep repeating? (Somewhere along the way he realizes the day isn’t awful, his beliefs about it and others are)
Lots of great lines about being stuck in the same miserable life that really make it clear this goes deeper than Phil’s situation.
Somewhere along the way he gives up, feels there’s nothing he can do, but then he realizes he can change. He wants to change. I think Rita inspires him to change, the way she is inspires him. He wants to be like that, live in her world, be worthy of being loved by her. He goes thru a manipulative stage but then he genuinely changes.
Rita says, “Maybe it’s not a curse. It’s just how you look at it!”
By the end, he thinks it’s beautiful there and he wants to live there.
7 & 8. What are the most profound moments of the movie? What are the most profound lines of the movie?
In the bar when he asks the guys what they’d do if stuck in one place and every day was the same and nothing you did mattered. That’s when we realize he could be talking about our own lives.
If you only had one day to live, what would you do?
He tricks her into falling in love with him, but it’s manipulative and she figures it out. He has no choice but to truly change if he wants to have a chance with her or to be happy.
“it’s going to be cold, grey, and it’s going to last for the rest of your life!”
Tries to kill himself, but still can’t escape that day.
“Maybe it’s not a curse! It’s just how you look at it.”
When he tells the sleeping Rita that she’s the kindest, sweetest, prettiest person. I’ve never seen anyone who’s nicer to people than you are… I don’t deserve someone like you, but if I ever could, I swear I’d love you for the rest of my life.” So then he changes to try to be someone who would deserve her. And she does finally love him. He’s happy.
And it’s finally a new day because he has changed and his perspective has changed, so he no longer has to relive the same miserable experience again. Love it! “It’s so beautiful! Let’s live here.”
9. How does the ending pay off the setups of this movie?
Phil hates it in Punxsutawney, hates everything about it, the people, the places, etc. At the end, after he has changed, he loves it. He spends every day trying to escape that wretched day, but by the end, he loves it and wants to live there.
10. What is the Profound Truth of this movie?
Phil is miserable and hates his experience on Groundhog Day until he changes, and then he wants to live there!
The only way to escape a miserable existence is to change yourself and your perspective. I also think the profound truth is that it IS possible to change, and then everything else will also change.
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Hi Everyone!
My name is Cindi Delinsky and I’ve written 6 screenplays and 1 TV pilot. I’ve taken numerous classes from SU over the last ten years, and then I stopped writing the last few years because of the constant stress and trauma involved in caring for my dad, who has Alzheimer’s. However, of all the different genres out there, my heart belongs to the Profound screenplay. I finally decided to sign up for the class because after the pandemic, I am craving creating things that are meaningful and profound. Something I find strange about myself is that right before COVID, I trained to become an End of Life doula, but during the training, I felt like I was drowning in emotions related to death. In retrospect, I think I may have been sensing the pandemic on the horizon. I’m looking forward to being in this class with all of you!
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Cindi Delinsky
I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.
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Hi Everyone!
My name is Cindi Delinsky and I’ve written 6 scripts and 1 TV pilot. I’ve taken numerous classes with Hal over the last ten years, but I stopped writing for the last few years because of the constant stress and trauma involved in caring for my father who has Alzheimer’s. However, all of a sudden I signed up for two classes from SU this month! (Thank you for the irresistible Free Friday calls you’ve done throughout the pandemic, Hal!) I hope to regain some of the writing skills I have neglected lately, as well as learn tools for being a more flexible, creative, and empowered writer who can work with producers. Something interesting is that two years ago I became an intuitive energy practitioner, and I think the generational clearing I’ve been doing on myself is what made me suddenly return to writing. This will be my first writing class that I’m combining with energy work, so I’m curious to see how it goes! I’m looking forward to learning from all of you in this class.
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Cindi Finds the Essence
What I learned is that I never thought about how many different ways the essence of a scene can be expressed. I also learned the importance of being clear about the essence and how being unclear can cause problems. This is a skill I would love to improve for myself.
The script I chose: SOUND OF METAL
Scene 1 Location: Middle of Act 1
Logline: After a doctor tells Ruben he should focus on preserving his hearing, he still plays the drums in the show with Lou.
Essence: Ruben is in denial about becoming deaf, and he doesn’t want to tell Lou or for things to change.
Scene 2 Location: Beginning of Act 2
Logline: As Lou and Ruben discuss what to do about their tour now that he’s deaf, Ruben goes to smoke. Lou calls his sponsor.
Essence: Ruben is a recovering addict, and Lou sees smoking as a sign he’s in trouble.
Scene 3 Location: Beginning of Act 3
Logline: After selling their tour bus and being kicked out of rehab, Ruben’s cochlear implants are activated, but the sound is harsh and disappointing. He wants to cry.
Essence: Ruben realizes his surgery will not make his life “normal” again, and he may have made a mistake.
Scene 4 Location: Near End of Act 3
Logline: As Ruben talks to the now vibrant, healthy Lou about resuming their band and tour, she resumes her old habit of anxiously scratching her skin.
Essence: Ruben realizes they both have changed while he was at rehab, and they can no longer be together.
Scene 5 Location: Final Scene of Act 3
Logline: Ruben leaves Lou’s house and is overwhelmed by a cacophony of chaotic and painful sounds produced by his cochlear implant. Enraged, he removes the device, and in stillness, he finds peace.
Essence: Ruben has transformed from believing deafness destroyed his world to finding profound peace and meaning in silence.
My selection for most profound essence:
Scene 5 Location: Final Scene of Act 3
Logline: Ruben leaves Lou’s house and is overwhelmed by a cacophony of chaotic and painful sounds produced by his cochlear implant. Enraged, he removes the device, and in stillness, he finds peace.
Essence: Ruben has transformed from believing deafness destroyed his world to finding profound peace and meaning in silence.
EXT. RICHARD’S APARTMENT – MORNING
Ruben opens the door to the street and steps out with his
bag. Even the early morning street noise hits his brain hard.
EXT. PARIS – MOMENTS LATER
Now Paris is awake and loud as Ruben walks through it. The
sound kills his head…
EXT. PARIS STREET – LATER
Ruben sits on a bench in front of a cathedral square as the
sounds of tourists, flocking pigeons, children, coalesce in a
crazy horrible cacophony. Then, to add to the chorus the
church bells start ringing. Their clanging slams at Ruben’s
brain. The world around him is a crazy chaotic mess. His
first impulse is rage. He reaches up and removes the devices
from his ears. Everything goes instantly silent. He breathes.
The morning sun breaks over the slate on the steeple. He
breathes again, something shifts, his eyes fall over the many
moments around him, no longer abrasive, they each have a
singular, silent beauty. He looks up at the church bells as
they swing silently back and forth…
Essence: Ruben has transformed from believing deafness destroyed his world to finding profound peace and meaning in silence.
I believe this is the essence because this scene made me want to cry. It feels like a profound expression of how unfortunate events in our lives can become gifts. Ruben’s journey had been one of dreading and fearing deafness, making a sacrifice to get cochlear implants so he could be with his girlfriend and bandmate again, and then, in the end, losing his girlfriend, hating the oppressive way he hears through the implant, and seemingly losing everything. And yet, in this final scene, we see that through his journey, he found profound peace and meaning in silence, something he never experienced before losing his hearing.
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Cindi Delinsky
I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.