Danielle Legrand
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Danielle LEGRAND’s Beat Sheet Draft 2
What I learned doing this assignement is marking the different stages of the Antagonist’s journey.
Pass 1 : INTERWEAVED THEME :
1. The story is about people who have will power but who feel a bit cramped by the rules of Society which weigh heavy on them.
2. The suffering of not being adapted to the world they are living in.
3. Men or women need their better half to lead a fulfilling life.
Pass 2 : THE ANTAGONIST JOURNEY :
1. AUDREY is angry about men in general.
2. She educates her children with solid principles in order to make them strong.
3. She wants to prove herself and her family she can make good things.
4. To set up a Church choir she deals with ADRIAN
5. They come out of their shells.
6. She appreciates him more and more
7. Society rules catch up with her
8. She discovers she is free in her Soul.
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Danielle LEGRAND’s Transformational Events
What I have learned doing this assignement is picturing the successive steps of a character’s transformation.
List of Changes or steps that need to happen for the character to go from who they are in the beginning to who they are in the ending :
ADRIAN
From easiest to most difficult :
– Stop acting his role as a Priest
– Relax, be natural
– Becoming a better listener
– Mingling with other peoples’activities.
– Participate in Sports events
– Break new ground compared with his predecessors
– Stop feeling embarrassed in a woman’s presence
Dramatic events or tests that could cause those changes for the character :
ADRIAN :
– Realizing his stereotyped ideas are not always true
– Recognizing the role of women in Christianity
– Experimenting an ever- growing solitude
– Finding Joy in the company of families.
– Helping his parishers to solve their prosaic problems
– Not feeling afraid of women any longer
– Standing up for injustice
AUDREY :
List of Changes or steps that need to happen for the character to go from who they are in the beginning to who they are in the ending :
– Make the choir a success
– Finding self-confidence
– Setting aside what other people will think of her
– Realize all men are not the same, particularly ADRIAN.
– Be herself
– Allow herself to be happy
– Forgive her parents.
Dramatic events or tests that could cause thoses changes for the character :
– Her choir is invited to perform in many other churches.
– She has to set the record straight with a « hollier than thou person »
– Revives a nice custom.
– Gets support from ADRIAN.
– Works together with him for helping a needy person
– For her children he is already part of their family.
– She feels guilty living a lie.
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Danielle LEGRAND’s 4 Act Transformational Structure :
What I have learned doing this assignement is organizing the thread of my story.
. Concept :
After having studied at a Political School and at the Seminar ADRIAN feels he does not live his life at its fullest.
. Main Conflict :
In spite of all thev Love and Respect he has for the job he has chosen to accomplish he does not feel at ease with its shady part.
Old ways :
Forbidding and punishing himself about a woman’s Love. Staying apart from ordinary life.
New ways :
Mingling with his parishers and sharing their everyday life
Act 1
. Opening : ADRIAN celebrates masses, baptisms, marriages and funerals the old way.
Inciting Incident : Someone criticizes his job and he is under the impression he is disconnected from other people. He can’t bear the solitude he seems to be doomed with.
. Turning Point :
Another enthusiastic Soul, AUDREY, wants to enliven the Parish, spread the Faith and make things happier.
Act 2
. New Plan :
– Singing the Mass
– Involving children and parents in the Church Life.
– Bring them support in their daily life
. Plan in Action :
– Taking care of the Elderly
– Creation of a choir
– Organizing events for Charities
– Allowing every child to go on holidays
. Midpoint Turning Point :
ADRIAN and AUDREY love each other.
Act 3
. Rethink everything : they start a double life
. New Plan : It is too difficult and they can’t go on like this.
. Turning point Huge Failure / Major Shift : They decide to
break up.
Act 4
. Climax :
ADRIAN has to make a choice. He chooses priesthood and AUDREY is regarded as the Devil by her friends and her family.
. Resolution :
By a curious coincidence, they meet again and can’t resist their Love. They discover Passion and decide they can no longer live like this. ADRIAN decides to announce his Faithfuls he will marry AUDREY and together they build a new family.
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Danielle LEGRAND’s Character Interviews :
What I learned doing this assignement is to deepen my knowledge of my characters background.
ADRIAN :
1. Tell me about yourself :
I am from a family of believers and I have been educated according to the values of charity and love for my neighbours.
2. Why do you think you were called to this journey ? Why you ?
What makes me feel I am personally called to this journey is the personal experience that I have lived with Jesus which reinforced my faith for the Lord and let me think I had to become a co-worker with Him.
3. You are up against the Catholic ordinary conventions. What is it about them that makes this journey even more difficult for you ?
They look very old and they show a total lack of understanding with our world new ways of life.
4. What fears, insecurities and wounds have you held back ?
Feeling guilty with no sensible reason, having unresolved questions about chastity and sexuality. I have been saddened by the hypocrisy and malaise prevailing at the seminary.
AUDREY :
1. Tell me about yourself :
I was born in a middle-class family in the small provincial town of BEAULIEU. I met my future husband when we still were in High Shool. I was madly in love with him and when I got pregnant my parents refused to give me an abortion and forced me to marry this young lover who turned into a violent alcoholic with me and the child.
2. Why do you think you were called to this journey ? Why you ?
I think my Faith has always helped me through a hard time when my husband left me with no means of support at all and that my family and the village cast me out.
3. You are against the Catholic ordinary conventions. What is it about them that makes this journey even more difficult for you ?
I am under the impression that everybody is against me whereas I am just looking for improving the life of people around me.
4. What fears, insecurities and wounds have you held back ?
I am suffering a lot of being rejected, even by my closest relatives. I would like to protect my children from the trials they will come up against. They give me the strenght and the courage of a « supernatural » Mother.
Discover about the Characters :
ADRIAN : The Seminar was not the place he hoped to find
AUDREY : She knows what she wants and she is not easily dishearted by the obstacles .
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Danielle LEGRAND’s Fast Formatting
What I have learned doing this assignement is describing an action scene so as to make the audience feel and live almost physically what is happening on the screen.
Location : The scene takes place in a shady night club cellar.
Scene Arc :
Beginning : HEATHER and MICKAEL – alias The First Lady and the scientist find the place where ANDREW- THE President- is confined by the VILLAINS
End : They get rid of the gangsters and save ANDREW.
Meaning or Change expressed for the Action :
. Before the Action : Dark world. Everything seems to be lost.
ANDREW has been caught, he has not received any antidote, the VILLAIN is still masked and the White HOUSE is unable to cope.
. During the Action : Dim lightning.Fighting as if their lives depended on their Victory ( and it is the case) ANDREW’s allies succeed in overpowering the mobsters.
. After the Action : Light and Hope come back as they get out of the shady place.The three ot them are alive and secure.
INT. NIGHT- CLUB CELLAR. DAYBREAK.
HEATHER and MICKAEL force their way into the place using Mickael’s Swiss knife. HEATHER enters firsts. She tries to switch on the light but MICKAEL holds her arm back.
MICKAEL
NO !
At the same moment…
… swish…
An arrow gets stuck into the wall panelling next to HEATHER’s head.
HEATHER
instinctively shrinking back
What ‘s the…
MICKAEL
Fuck !
They both get down and run with a stoop for a shelter under the tables…
…Bang…Bang…Bang …
A rifle shoots repeatedly at them from behind the bar.
MICKAEL ducks the bullets clasping the precious antidote bag to his chest…
…some cracks…
…on the floor …
HEATHER is creeping towards the counter and…
Bing ! …
She hits the man on his head with a big bottle of Bourbon.
Broken glass smash into pieces all over the room and mix with the alcohol and the bleeding of the man’s head. He falls down on the marble floor with a groan.
Still on guard, HEATHER sees a staircase leading downwards on her right .
HEATHER
This way !
MICKAEL picks up the rifle and follows her when …
Stomp … stomp…
Sound of heavy footsteps …
… Climbing upstairs !
HEATHER finds a hold on the banister and …
Bam !
She strongly strikes the MAN running upstairs with both feet on his stomach.
PAF !
The MAN tumbles …
Ba da bum… Ba da bum …
ARH !
…all the way downstairs…
Carefully, HEATHER and MICKAEL also get downstairs. He is ready to shoot with the rifle pointed downwards. In the cellar, ANDREW is tied to an old chair. Bad bruises on his face. A man is standing next to him with a gun on his left temple.
THE MAN
(with a fierce look)
One more step and he is…
…Ouch !
While MICKAEL does a right and left with the rifle on both knees of the mobster …
… In three light steps HEATHER has delivered a hail of kicks in his face.
Bodyfall.
ANDREW
(shabby looking)
Someone’s got an aspirin ?
MICKAEL
(smiling)
I think I have better for you, Mister PRESIDENT !
…
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Danielle LEGRAND’s Character Profile Part 2
What I have learned in this assignement is knowing my characters better and preparing their future behaviour according to their psychology.
What draws us to the character(s) :
ADRIAN
. Traits : Sincere, enthusiastic, idealist
. Subtext : Truth is so important to him that he can’t hide it.
He just can’t.
. Flaw : Always in control, irrealistic with a tendancy to always
see the bright side of things and disregard the bad one.
. Values :Charity. Honesty and integrity are very important to
Him.
. Irony: He is full of Love but he thinks it is forbidden for him
to experience it on the human scale.
What makes him the right character for this role : He has already tried politics in an attempt to change the world but he is looking for another way of making it a better place and find Peace.
AUDREY
. Traits : dynamic, voluntarist,
. Subtext :When she does not say or try to hide something ,she
is so ackward and unconfortable that anyone can see it.
. Flaw : She often thinks after speaking
. Values : Children come first, kindness, solidarity.
. Irony : A feminist, she is quite sure she will never trust a man
enough to make a fresh start with him.
What makes her the right character for this role : She has a profound call for embellishing life and make it worth living, pass her strenght,courage and hope to her children. She is longing for Happiness.
ADRIAN’s improved Profile : the Hero/ Dreamer
A charming and idealistic young man went to a School of Political Science. When his closest friend dies in a car accident he has a revelation and he enters the seminar for he still has a strong inner desire in his heart to love God more than anything and serve his « fellow man »as much as he could. He would like to help people find God and keeps a childish obedient relationship with the Roman Church without any questioning. Always in control, he assumes he has to sacrifice his own outer life to fulfill his vocation. He loves people and forgives them whatever they do. On the opposite he is very strict with himself.
AUDREY’s improved Profile :The Antagonist
A pretty dynamic young woman with a conventional background wants to make the Church move and be adapted to the present time. She has had a very bad experience with her chidren’s father. He used to beat her when he was drunk and finally abandoned the family home. Courageous and full of ideas she is very active as a good mother and a feminist. She is always ready to help even if her own family is rather stand-offish. Spontaneous and voluntarist, she has taken into her head to put on a choir in the Parish and make the church an attractive and joyful place.
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Danielle LEGRAND’ s Character Profiles Part 1
What I have learned doing this assignement is making up my characters’ personalities
A. Protagonist :
Role in the story : He is the Hero / Dreamer. There is an inner desire in his heart to love God more than anything and to love his fellow man as much as himself.
B. Antagonist :
Role in the story : She is a Change Agent. She lives her faith with joy and happiness. She feels free in her Soul and would like to make the Church more lively.She dreams about a Church of Praises, with joyful songs which would bring people together.
C. Other Necessary Characters :
. Minor roles : the Antagonist’s children
– Best friend
– Family
. Background Characters :
– Extras needed to make it work visually (ex. Mass)
D. Genre : Rom-Com / Buddy Movie
E. Lead Character Profiles :
Role in the story :
The Protagonist : Hero / Dreamer
Age range and Description :
Now 30 years old, he entered the Seminar at 22 after a school of Political Science. A dark-haired and black magnetic -eyed young man, he is at the Head of the Parish and is totally involved in what he thinks to be his vocation.
Internal Journey :
Idealistic, he would like to help people find God and keeps a childish obedient relationship with the Roman Church. He is always in control and assumes he has to sacrifice his own Life.
External Journey : He will become a responsible man, capable of loving and being loved.
Motivation : Helping others to find God.
Wound : The grievous loss of a loved one. Only the prayer could appease the pain.
Mission / Agenda : To announce the « good piece of news » to the world and to spread his Faith.
Secret : He has had a revelation about the existence of God.
What makes him special : He is very attractive and charming, but he does not know it.
The Antagonist : Agent of change
Age Range and Description :
Around 25. A mother of two adorable children. A fair-haired and blue-eyed pretty small woman. Funny and full of life she has got plenty of ideas to make the image of the Church more dynamic and fill the place with the faithful.
Internal Journey : Her family and the people around her look upon her as a person doomed to failure. She has lost her self-confidence and must fight everyday to face others’ bad judgements.
External Journey : turning towards other suffering people and helping them she will finally find happiness again.
Motivation : She would like to put on a choir in the parish.
Wound : her children’s father has abandoned the family home
Mission /Agenda : Make the Church move
Secret : A near death experience
What makes her special : Always positive whatever happens.
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Danielle’s Transformational Journey
What I have learned doing this assignement is having a clear idea of my story development
Who is my hero and what is his character Arc that represents a transformation ?
My hero is a young catholic Priest, ADRIAN, who has been taught he must remain a bachelor all his life long
But who discovers he is missing his true mission by refusing a woman’s Human Love.
Internal Journey : He discovers that Love is not limited to Religion but is a part of Life itself.
External Journey : By confronting Society, he will discover what Tolerance can teach him about himself and about his real Mission.
What are the Old Ways ?
. He accepts the Roman Catholic Church dogmas
. He thinks only friendship is allowed between a woman and himself
. He feels very distressed when he is attracted to AUDREY
. Feeling guilty, he prefers to sacrifice himself.
What are the New Ways ?
. He accepts being in love with AUDREY
. He wants to get out of this ackward situation
. He decides to stop being a Priest and marry AUDREY
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My name is Danielle LEGRAND
I agree to the terms of this release form.
GROUP RELEASE FORM
As a member of this group, I agree to the following:
1. That I will keep the processes, strategies, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class confidential, and that I will NOT share any of this program either privately, with a group, posting online, writing articles, through video or computer programming, or in any other way that would make those processes, teleconferences, communications, lessons, and models of the class available to anyone who is not a member of this class.
2. That each writer’s work here is copyrighted and that writer is the sole owner of that work. That includes this program which is copyrighted by Hal Croasmun. I acknowledge that submission of an idea to this group constitutes a claim of and the recognition of ownership of that idea.
I will keep the other writer’s ideas and writing confidential and will not share this information with anyone without the express written permission of the writer/owner. I will not market or even discuss this information with anyone outside this group.
3. I also understand that many stories and ideas are similar and/or have common themes and from time to time, two or more people can independently and simultaneously generate the same concept or movie idea.
4. If I have an idea that is the same as or very similar to another group member’s idea, I’ll immediately contact Hal and present proof that I had this idea prior to the beginning of the class. If Hal deems them to be the same idea or close enough to cause harm to either party, he’ll request both parties to present another concept for the class.
5. If you don’t present proof to Hal that you have the same idea as another person, you agree that all ideas presented to this group are the sole ownership of the person who presented them and you will not write or market another group member’s ideas.
6. Finally, I agree not to bring suit against anyone in this group for any reason, unless they use a substantial portion of my copyrighted work in a manner that is public and/or that prevents me from marketing my script by shopping it to production companies, agents, managers, actors, networks, studios or any other entertainment industry organizations or people.
This completes the Group Release Form for the class.
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1. My name is Danielle LEGRAND
2. I’ve written 4 scripts.
3. I hope to get the ability to right complete scripts in a methodological and fast way.
4. I don’t think I’m exceptional. On the contrary I hope I’m just a regular woman doing a wonderful job.
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Danielle’s Great Action Set Piece
What I learned doing this assignement is not being afraid of exaggerating the situations to push the Action forward.
SETUP : A cyber-attack paralyzes the White House while the PRESIDENT is injected a mortal virus and blackmailed to start a war.
PRE-ACTION :
. The HERO must keep his head and react swiftly in a proper way.
. Protect his wife and friends.
. Look for the traitor
. Save his own life
. Avoid a war
Action :
Anxiety and Fear :
. Not only electric and electronic devices are out of order for a while but the computers are now transformed in bots giving fake information and messing up all the White House affairs.
Relief :
. The way the PRESIDENT gets in touch with the people he trusts and needs, using their secret and personal codes of communication. He manages to get his blood secretly analyzed.
Surprise ans Shock :
. With the help of his wife – PAMELA / HEATHER 😉 – and his new ally, GAVIN, an analyst who is wrongly despised by the VILLAIN , they find who the TRAITOR is and a plan to trap him.
Suspense :
. The ALLIES reverse the computer bug against TOM, the VILLAIN and this enables them to localize the PRESIDENT.
. The HERO falls into the MOB’s hands.
Danger :
. Very little time is left to find and inject the antidote to the Hero who becomes weaker and weaker
Adrenaline :
. The VILLAINS lay into him, but the PRESIDENT uses his « Ki » power to stop them.
Post Action :
. The scientist discovers an experimental antidote against the lethal virus and saves the HERO.
. GAVIN finds his self-confidence again.
. The First Lady karate training pays off.
. The plot has been exposed and neutralized.
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Danielle’s Unique Action ! Lesson 13
What I learned doing this assignement is that brainstorming and thinking out of the box can be fun and exciting.
Looking at my entire story, what is unique about :
1.Environment : From the White House to a Washington street market and a suburban apartment.
2.Rules : Inside the White House the Hero decides and the people around him just obey his orders.
Outside he is only relying on himself to survive and anyone could be his enemy. No more rules.
3.Villain : As he coordinates everything in the White House
he is favourably considered which enables him to act
freely.
4.Mission : The Hero must both fight for his life and for
Homeland security. Discovering the traitor(s) is crucial.
5.Struggle : Staying in good shape long enough to solve all the problems and escape the enemy.
6.Unique Skillset : A good sense of psychology. The President knows how to manipulate his opponents and trick them.
7.Meaning : Apart from his closest ones the Hero becomes
aware he should never grant anybody with full power to
act. He also understands the importance of clearing any
confused or illogical situation.
8.Allies : Personal Assistant, a Linen Maid, a toxicologist
who is also a friend of his and his wife.
9.Weapon : A great connection with his closest associate
and his partner. Essential Karate « katas » he practised
with his wife for fun. Poison and guns for the villains,
computer science tricks.
Step 2.
A. What if…The President and his wife used to play a game every evening allowing them to tell about what they have found surprising, weird or funny during the day. They would call this game « The Proof on the Roof » and some details could be very useful to the First Lady’s investigation in that case.
B. Take to an extreme : Normally the PRESIDENT is a smart and well educated person. As he changes his clothes and appearance not to be recognized as he runs away, the PRESIDENT also changes completely the way he behaves and speaks. He gets what he wants when he is taken for a delivery man.
A. Specific to character or environment : He passes in front of some children selling tombola tickets for a charity. One of them is very insistent and he gives him the money he is asking for.
B. Shocking or surprising : The child is happy to take his hand and make him enter the tent behind him. This is the place where people are asked to write down their name and address in case they should be the winner.
By doing so the hero escapes the killers chasing him. They just can see a group of children who have no reason to let them in.
C. Go opposite : When the hero’s allies understand what is going on they make up a plan to trap the villains and turn the situation round against them.
D. What haven’t we seen ?
The FIRST LADY could be quite a strong character. As an ex. Karate champion she is able to fight and be a leader in the allies’ investigation and in the resolution of the conflict.
The improvements I have made :
– Fleshing out my characters more.
– Connecting the dots between the action scenes.
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Danielle’s Level 3 Action Emotions
What I have learnd doing this assignement is immersing myself into the situation in order to be able to make the audience also feel the danger, excitement and the adrenaline in my scene.
1.
Obstacle : It is not easy to escape his bodyguards’s notice. Now the PRESIDENT mistrusts the people around him. He has to think wisely and act quickly.
2.
A cyber-attack shuts down all the White House computing system. Seized with a feverish urge experts are trying to identify the source of the attack and save the White House files. In the confusion the Security Services have lost track of the PRESIDENT and are in a panic. As he realizes he cannot trust anyone for the moment the latter who managed to take a sample of his own blood has taken refuge ouside the building on the balcony of the infirmary window.
3.
The PRESIDENT’s hot mobile phone is ringing off. Clinging on the balcony banister he does not answer. He seems rooted to the spot.
PERSONAL ASSISTANT’s messages
(On the President’s phone screen)
First message : Where are you, Sir ?
Second message : Secret services have locked down the perimeter.
Third message : Please, ANDREW, for God’s sake !
Fourth message : ANSWER ME ! Tell me you are in the RESIDENCE.
THE PRESIDENT
(He finally calls back)
Meet me at the delivery entrance !
Sound of footsteps rushing in the corridor. Andrew cuts off the phone and nimbly hides in a large tank filled with a pile of dirty linen.
Three men under arms burst into the room and look around.
One of them bangs his knee against the metallic linen tank.
He addresses a linen maid waiting at the door.
THE MAN
(with an angry look)
Chuck me this thingy !
In a hurry and with a stare look at the gun the middle-aged woman wheels the tank along the corridor towards an elevator.
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Danielle’s Level 2 Action Emotions
What I have learned doing this assignement is to keep the audience’ s attention and curiosity.
INCITING MOMENT :
The nurse who comes and vaccinates the PRESIDENT according to schedule has been secretly switched with a VILLAIN’s accomplice. She inoculates the hero with a timing poison. In exchange with the antidote the VILLAIN wants the PRESIDENT to make a money transfer which could start a war against China.
SURPRISE :
INT. THE RESIDENCE INFIRMARY. DAY
THE NURSE pulls the needle of the syringe out and rubs the hero’s arm with a bit of cotton wool.
NURSE (smiling)
Here we are, Mister PRESIDENT ! The flu will no longer have any effect on you …
She leans forwards and whispers some words in his ear.
NURSE
Don’t tell a word or your wife will be killed. You have just been treated with the Ebola virus.
The PRESIDENT’s eyes widen with awe. At the same moment He receives a vocal message on his mobile phone.
MESSAGE
Keep quiet. I have got the antidote for your special vaccine. As soon as we receive the Chinese cobalt contract money- that is to say 1 billion dollars – to the right bank account, you’ll receive the antidote. Otherwise, you’ll be die very quickly. You have 8 hours left to comply. Note it well :
Bank account number : INDEPENDANT TAIWAN ORGANIZATION Nr 842713765 943-001 094814732.
In the meantime the nurse left as she came.
SHOCK :
The PRESIDENT stays motionless for a while. He runs his hands on his face. He is very pale as he turns his sleeves down.
The man at the door has seen the nurse getting out. She left the door open.
MAN at the door
(He looks inside the infirmary.)
Is everything all right, Sir ?
The PRESIDENT is breathing heavily. Big beads of sweat stream over his face. He has a job keeping his hands from shaking.
The PRESIDENT
Yes …yes. I will just have a private phone call to make.
The MAN respectfully shuts the door.
SUSPENSE :
The PRESIDENT calls the WESTWING SWITCHBOARD OPERATOR.
The PRESIDENT
Put me through to the…
The phone conversation is abruptly cut off and all the electrical lights and appliances go off.
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Danielle Legrand’s Level 1 Action Emotions.
What I learned doing this assignement is controlling the audience’s emotions.
INT. THE PRESIDENT’s DRAWING-ROOM. EVENING
ANDREW, the PRESIDENT stops talking and closes his eyes. His face is twisted with pain and he presses his fingers against his temples. He gives a small cry of pain.
HEATHER, the PRESIDENT’S wife
What’s wrong, honey ? Did you hurt yourself ?
ANDREW breathes heavily in and out three times.
ANDREW
No, it’s nothing … Just these damned high-pitched hissing noises in my ear !
HEATHER watches him with a concerned look.
HEATHER
May be MICKAËL should examine you tonight ? You know that besides being your friend and a brilliant scientist, he is also a good doctor.
ANDREW
It’s O.K. honey. Don’t worry about it.
He forces himself to smile
ANDREW
Are you ready for dinner Cutie pie ?
A discreet knock at the door and Aaron the PRESIDENT’s PERSONAL ASSISTANT introduces MICKAEL, into the drawing-room and closes the door behind him. He greets ANDREW and HEATHER with a smile and takes the drink ANDREW is holding out to him. Suddenly he frowns.
MICKAEL
He raises a finger near his own ear. Can you hear that ? I don’t know if it’s just me but since I have entered the RESIDENCE I am hearing strange and disturbing sounds in my left ear. I don’t understand. It looks like I am the only one to hear that …
ANDREW
No, you’re not. I am wondering …
HEATHER stands up from the couch and exclaims.
HEATHER
Oh, my God ! May be we have been infected with the micro-wave energy weapon the RUSSIANS used against the Ambassador !
The President’s telephone rings. They all look at each other as struck down with paralysis.
Slowly, ANDREW picks up the phone and engages the loudspeaker
GAVIN, the GENERAL SECRETARYs voice off
Please, Mister PRESIDENT excuse my intruding into your private moments, but in order to eliminate any new acoustic attack threat we just had to try a simulation software. Now everything is under control. I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for the inconveniences. Have a niceevening Mister PRESIDENT.
ANDREW
He heaves a sign relief.
Thank you for your good work, Gavin.
Have a nice evening, too.
He hangs up the phone.
After all it is not the first time my ears are ringing !
MICKAEL laughs up his sleeve. whereas HEATHER cracks a joke after taking a glance at her watch
HEATHER, with a mischievous smile
I guess the SENATE session has just begun …
They all clink their glasses
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Danielle LEGRAND’s Favourite Twists !
What I learned doing this assignement is to surprise the audience and add a bit of spice to the situations which become more exciting this way.
1. The following scenes could need a twist or two :
a) When the HERO looks completely trapped but finds a way to escape.
b) When he is running away and gets an unexpected support from a child.
c) When the HERO is forced to transfer the funds but a surprising alliance makes the plan fail.
d) When he thinks he is going to die and the scientist has finally find a way to get an unexpected antidote.
e) When he is threatened of death and his wife saves him.
2 & 3. Ways to use the Twists :
a) Trap / Trick……………………………. Escape
b) New threat……………………………. Unexpected support
c) Betrayal………………………………. Surprising alliance
d) It just got worse……………………. It just Got Better
e) Unexpected weapon………………. Surprising Response
4&5. Building my favorite twists into the scenes:
a) The hero manages to land in a laundry basket after being poisoned.
b) A child sells him a tombola ticket and without meaning it hides him from his pursuer’s eyes.
c) A VILLAIN’s «punching bag» colleague re-transfers the money on the right account thinking he will avoid being accused of « a new mistake ».
d) As he could not get the right chemicals the scientist has the idea to make it from some plants in his garden.
e) When the VILLAIN thinks he will beat and kill the hero but becomes the target of a super karate champion, the FIRST LADY herself.
5.My FIVE favorite twists would be :
– Lost resources………………………………New resources
– Reversal…………………………………………Reverse the reversal
– It just got worse……………………………It just get better
– Deceived………………………………………. Surprising Truth
– Identity or Plan exposed……………. Identity hidden
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Danielle LEGRAND’s LIKABILITY / EMPATHY / JUSTIFICATION
What I learned during this assignement is making the hero likable, and arouse empathy for him. I also learned to justify any behaviour which could be judged as « unlikable » otherwise.
1. LIKABILITY / LOVABILITY
A. He makes a promise to his dying daughter
B. The hero plants a tree
C. He gives time for Charities
D. He pays a visit to a lonely old Lady
E. He is witty and humorous with his staff
EMPATHY / DISTRESS
A. His daughter died in his arms
B. He has received a lethal injection
C. He does not know who his enemy is
D. He has a difficut choice to make between his life and the country security first.
E. He is beaten and tortured
JUSTIFICATION
A. The hero must save his life
B. He must protect his wife
C. He has to find the antidote without compromising the scientist
D. He is also a victim of the cyber-attack
E. Whatever he does he knows the villains would kill him.
2. THE PRESIDENT- WHY WE CARE
In the opening scene the PRESIDENT makes the promise to take care of the environment as his daughter is dying from an illness linked to pollution.
The hero keeps his promise and plants trees in the city. He deals with a charity and take care of ill children.
When his Chief of Staff, TOM the VILLAIN – tries to blame his personal aid he shows kindness and humour.
Late in the evening, he has dinner with his closest friend -the scientist – and his wife. Then he shares a very romantic routine with his wife.
When THE « NURSE » injects and blackmails him he has to run away and is submerged by all what is happening at the same time. There is a cyber-attack in the White House. He can’t call his friend for help. He worries about his health and his wife’s fate as well as the country security. The HERO must absolutely run away in order to be able to act properly in such a catastrophic situation and we feel so sorry for him !
3. I’d like to keep the moments when the hero makes a promise to his daughter and when he is involved in good actions for the environment and the children.
I also like his humour and kindness towards his staff as well as the « romantic routine » with his wife.
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Danielle LEGRAND’s STORY MAP
What I have learnt during this assignement is to find a balance in the structure of my story between the mission, the action, and the villain’s track.
MISSION
M1 : Saving his life
M2 : Preventing a war
M3 : Protecting his wife and the scientist
M4: Find who the Villains are
M5 : Repairing the cyber-attack damages
M6 : Getting back to normality
VILLAIN TRACK
V1 : Acting like a very reliable and indispensable collaborator
V2 : Giving orders nobody would discuss
V3 : Directing a cyber-attack to create a diversion
V4 : Finding the hero
V5 : Obtaining the sparking off the war.
V6 : Killing the hero
ACTION TRACK
A1 : Poisoning the hero
A2 : Launching a cyber-attack
A3 : Escaping of the hero
A4 : Trying to save the President’s life
A5: Chasing the hero
A6 : The First Lady’s Investigation
A7 : The capture and torture of the hero
A8 : The rescue
OPENING
V1
V2
INCITING INCIDENT
A1
A2
V3
M1
M2
END OF FIRST ACT – TURNING POINT
A3
M3
V4
A4
A5
MIDPOINT
M4
SECOND TURNING POINT :
A4
V5
CRISIS / DILEMNA
A7
V6
CLIMAX
A6
A8
RESOLUTION
A8
M5
M6
TOM’s day organizing the President’s daily activities. We can see he has important tasks in hand and he is the closest person to the President. Each presidential day is rythmed at a steady tempo by him. On the other hand, PAMELA the PRESIDENT’s wife appears as a modern sportive young woman (ex. karate champion) and also as a romantic one who would appreciate more privacy with her husband.
The nurse who comes and vaccinates the PRESIDENT according to schedule has been secretly switched with a VILLAIN’s accomplice. First she has killed the real nurse, then she inoculates the hero with a timing poison. To get the antidote the VILLAIN wants him to do something which would start a war with CHINA.
The PRESIDENT decides to trick the VILLAIN and flee (hidden in a laundry van) to get some help without compromising the scientist who could find the antidote. He has to change his clothes and his general appearance. He becomes an ordinary citizen with a gigantic problem to solve.
The President understands he has to solve his problems on his own.He has to find who his opponents are without overlooking a search for the antidote as soon as possible. The Russian Mobis after him. PAMELA suspects something wrong is happening. She does a little private investigation and she understands her husband is in trouble. She is ready to make anything to find what is going on.
THE SCIENTIST is lacking a rare component for making the antidote. The President becomes weaker and weaker and has trouble escaping detection from the Mob after him.
The hero is caught by the villains who want to force him into starting a war. He is beaten and tortured but he does not give up. He knows he is going to die
PAMELA has found clues which lead her to the VILLAINS. The SCIENTIST has managed to get in touch with her since he has been successful making a specific antidote. They break into the criminals‘ den.
These ones get a good thrashing by the FIRST LADY who is still well trained in karate. In the meantime the scientist saves the hero and the C.I.A. remand them in custody before sending them to a Chinese prison.
We learn the Presidential couple always has had their secret codes and connections which have proved to be very useful in such a situation. As they receive the Queen of England they share funny moments of complicity as they can see Her Majesty has also her personal secret codes.
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Danielle LEGRAND’s ACTION STRUCTURE
What I learned during this assignement is seeing more clearly the sequence of events.
1.OPENING :
TOM’s day organizing the President’s daily activities. We can see he has important tasks in hand and he is the closest person to the President. Each presidential day is rythmed at a steady tempo by him. On the other hand, PAMELA the PRESIDENT’s wife appears as a modern sportive young woman (ex. karate champion) and also as a romantic one who would appreciate more privacy with her husband.
2. INCITING MOMENT :
The nurse who comes and vaccinates the PRESIDENT according to schedule has been secretly switched with a VILLAIN’s accomplice. First she has killed the real nurse, then she inoculates the hero with a timing poison. To get the antidote the VILLAIN wants him to do something which would start a war with CHINA.
3. FIRST TURNING POINT AT THE END OF ACT 1 :
The PRESIDENT decides to trick the VILLAIN and flee (hidden in a laundry van) to get some help without compromising the scientist who could find the antidote. He has to change his clothes and his general appearance. He becomes an ordinary citizen with a gigantic problem to solve.
4. MIDPOINT :
The President understands he has to solve his problems on his own.He has to find who his opponents are without overlooking a search for the antidote as soon as possible. The Russian Mobis after him. PAMELA suspects something wrong is happening. She does a little private investigation and she understands her husband is in trouble. She is ready to make anything to find what is going on.
5. SECOND TURNING POINT :
THE SCIENTIST is lacking a rare component for making the antidote. The President becomes weaker and weaker and has trouble escaping detection from the Mob after him.
6. CRISIS/ DILEMMA :
The hero is caught by the villains who want to force him into starting a war. He is beaten and tortured but he does not give up. He knows he is going to die
7.
CLIMAX :
PAMELA has found clues which lead her to the VILLAINS. The SCIENTIST has managed to get in touch with her since he has been successful making a specific antidote. They break into the criminals‘ den.
These ones get a good thrashing by the FIRST LADY who is still well trained in karate. In the meantime the scientist saves the hero and the C.I.A. remand them in custody before sending them to a Chinese prison.
8. RESOLUTION :
We learn the Presidential couple always has had their secret codes and connections which have proved to be very useful in such a situation. As they receive the Queen of England they share funny moments of complicity as they can see Her Majesty has also her personal secret codes.
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Danielle LEGRAND
ACTION TRACK
What I learned doing this assignement is sequencing the action scenes in logical order.
1. Answers
A. In this movie there could be :
– cyber-attacks
– Dangerous situations
– Torture
– Escape / Evad
– Chase/Pursuit
– Kidnapping
– Fight
– Interrogation
– Shoutout
– Rescue
B. The villain can count on a malware to infect and transform any White House computer into a pawn for the cyber-attack. The delayed virus he was injected with, gradually poisons the hero. When this one tries to escape and save his life the Villain has a bunch of Russian mafia gangs at his disposal to hunt and catch the President and his wife. The Villain may think it would be helpful kidnapping the hero’s wife in order to pressurize the hero into doing whatever his evil plan needs. Sending armed to the teeth mercenaries after the Presidential couple would be a piece of cake.
C. First, the Villain has prepared his mission for a long time and every detail has been carefully planned and organized. His plan takes place as he anticipated it.
Second Act : the Villain realizes the President is tougher than he thoughtand that he will not cooperate in spite of the mortal virus he has been injected with and the threat of killing his beloved wife.
Third Act : The hero’s escape and his search for an antidote before the end of the day escalates the action as well as the danger of the mercenaries after him. The climax is reached when he is caught tortured and he looks like a dying man.
2.
I will use every type of action from the list.
3.
F. COMPETITION : The Villain confronts a young ambitious coworker in his team who could help to unveil his part in the happening events.
G. DANGEROUS SITUATION : The President is trapped by the person he trusts the most in the White House.
E. ESCAPE/ EVAD : The hero has to run away and find help without compromising his scientific friend or his wife. The President has used a trick to credit back his account, the President has to escape quickly before the Villain becomes aware that he has just been diddled. Under the pretext he is going to play golf, the hero disappears and changes his appearance by stealing clothes and accessories in an open-air market.
A. CHASE/ PURSUIT : The Russian Mafia is on his heels.
H/C. INTERROGATION AND SHOOTOUT : The killers shoot the people they interrogate because they can’t help them find the President or his wife.
I. TORTURE : As he becomes weaker and weaker the hero is caught and tortured to make him comply to the Villain ‘s mission.
B. FIGHT : The hero’s wife who has been in touch with their friend, the scientist finds his husband with the help of the agent in competition with the Villain. They kick the villains’ asses.
D. RESCUE : The Secret Services arrive and get rid of the Villains whereas the scientist administers the antidote to the hero.
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Danielle LEGRAND’s VILLAIN TRACK…/…
TRACK LABELS :
1.MISTAKE
The Villain tries to kidnap the President’s wife but it does not work for she is stronger and more clever than he thought.
2.DILEMMA
What to do when he finds the President did not really transfer the money on the right bank account and that he and his wife are on the move under false identities ? He has temporarely prevented them from communicating with the White House. So, how to find them soon enough ?
3.DECISION
To launch his men from the Russian Mafia network on their heels.
4. PLAN / Hit contract
Find all the places and people who could help the Presidential couple and use all means of facial recognition on the streets and public transportation.
5.PLAN/ Hiding out
The Villain must absolutely remain in power and keep a semblance of normality in the White House whereas the President misses every meeting and duty as the Head of State.
6.CAPTURE
The President let himself be caught in order to allow his wife to run away. He is tortured by the Villain and forced to send the 10 million dollars to Taïwan as in the Russian plan.
7.RETALIATION
He announces the hero that he will never receive the antidote and he will kill his wife. He knocks him about.
8.ESCAPE
When the hero’s wife burst into the apartment she starts a ruthless fight and humiliate the Villain who really would like to be able to escape but finishes completely crushed.
9.FITTING ENDING
No one will know the country nearly was in a war. The newspapers announce a profitable contract with China whereas the President and the First Lady receive the Queen of England for tea-time. In the meantime the Villain is having a very hard time with his Chinese jailers.
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Danielle LEGRAND
The Villain Track
What I have learned doing this assignement is to define and know my character better
1.The Villain
A.
The Villain has managed to be a part of the President’s inner circle.
He looks like a very reliable administrator acting as aid at the Ministry
of Finance. Everybody totally trusts him.
His plan consists in being well-established on the strategic spot so as to be
able to give orders and create a non-questionable financial situation even
if his coworkers do not always understand what he is doing. As a double
agent for Russia he could easily set the U.S.A. and China at loggerheads.
Thus he could retrieve a juicy money market for his country and avoid being
uncovered by killing the President.
B.
The Villain can attack the hero in many ways :
– Responsabilities :
. The Villain has access to secret files and make the most of them against the U.S.A. interests.
. He can spare the President little inconveniences and make the hero grateful to him instead of arousing suspicion about his loyalty.
. The Villain, on the contrary, can bring discredit upon the good people around the President.
– Politics :
. The Villain can start a war between the U.S.A. and China and completely desorganize the country with the death of the President.
– Personal and family life :
. The villain can poison the hero and force him to carry his plan
through when he blackmails him with the antidote.
. The Villain can put pressure on the hero, threatening him about his
wife and close friends.
. He can break every communication from the hero to the ones who
could help him.
– Physically :
. He can abuse and even kill the hero.
C.
The Villain has a good position in the inner circle of the hero.
He works as a mole and nobody knows who he really is.
He has an excellent American accent.
He is highly trusted
He has accomplices in the White House.
All these advantages allow him to act without compromising himself.
D.
Fitting End :
The hero’s wife will kick the villain’s ass and he will be injected with a truth drug by the scientist.
The villain will see he has himself be tricked by a coworker.
Finally they will be arrested and sentenced to life imprisonment with Chinese guards who only speak Chinese, which he does not understand at all.
The Chinese guards snigger every time he opens his mouth because he looks like a fool.
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What I have learned doing this assignement is to clearly define and organize my story.
Danielle LEGRAND Hero’s MissionTrack
1.
A. As the President has received a mortal injection and has just a few hours to get the antidote, he has to react very quickly.
B. Besides he would have to deal with the situation all by himself otherwise his wife would be killed.
C. Strong Internal motivation : He does not want to die and he also wants to keep the promise he has made to his daughter just before she passed away : to make the world a better place.
Strong external motivation : He has been elected thanks to his high morality and he still intends to be loyal to his country. He really wants to avoid a war.
D. Naturally his behaviour would be suspiscious for his bodyguards and for his wife herself. He has to use his mental ressources.
2.
Clear Mission :
Motivation : He does not want to die after a poisonous injection and besides he has to prevent a war from breaking out.
Inciting incident : A false nurse has injected the President a poison instead of a vaccine. According to the message he was informed of, he must send one billion dollars to the Taiwanese Separtist Freedom Fighters and keep the situation secret or his wife would become a target.
First action : The President sends the money to the Taiwanese Account, manages to isolate himself and find a syringe in a medecine chest to make his blood secretly sent to a medical scientist and friend of him and have some tests done.
Obstacle : It is not easy to escape his bodyguards’ notice. The President has to change his physical appearance and to use some mental tricks to do so.
Besides, the clock is ticking and he feels more and more contaminated.
Escalation : The money the President has sent was originally intended for Chinese Industry Cooperation. China just can’t wait any longer to receive this important amount of money. The President becomes physically weaker but he uses his mental abilities to find the person(s) behind this situation.
Overwhelming Odds : The President has found who are the traitors among the people around him and he has realized they never intended to give him the antidote or to spare his wife’s life.
His firend who is a scientist finds it difficult to get the antidote.
New Plan : Warn by the scientist his wife is going to understand the President is in big trouble. She will help the scientist and get the antidote without attracting attention : After all she is the first Lady and she can’t be refused anything.
The President whose health is deterioring decides anyway to confront his enemy and make him tell about his real intentions.
Full out Attack :
Absolutely satisfied and self-assured the Russian mole confesses that, according to his plan, a war between the U.S.A. and China will bring a very strategic monopole to his country. It means a lot of money for himself too. The Russian mole even laughs at the President and he punches and kicks him.
That is when the scientist and his wife burst in. While the scientist injects the antidote, the President’s wife – who is an ex. martial Art Champion- knocks the villain down before he is arrested by the secret sevices agents.
Success :
The President and his wife are still alive. The President had managed to secretely re-transfer the money back without leaving any computing trace. The U.S.A and China live at Peace and conclude a business agreement about a rare metal.
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What I have learned doing this assignement is to go under the surface of a general idea and how to structure the story thanks to the right questioning.
1.
Concept :
– Hero Morally Right : Not only he is the very commited President of the U.S.A but also a very talented mentalist.
– Villain Morally wrong : A greedy businessman who wants to monopolize a rare metal from China .
Hero :
– A. Super Mentalist abilities.
– B. He is really committed to protecting Peace.
– C. He has promised his dead daughter to make the world a better place.
Villain :
– A. He has a solid grasp upon the country economy and can stop entire sectors ( food, electricity etc…)
– B. He plans to obtain a document to start a war with China.
– C. If the hero survives the villain looses everything.
Impossible Mission :
– A. Hero has to take action immediately with the delayed poison injected to him.
– B. Hero must fight physically , which he hates.
– C. Hero can’t use the government ressources to destroy the villain and has to use his owns
2. If his wife was to discover the truth, then how might he accept her help ?
3. She would not ask him to help but would just do it as an ex champion of martial arts.
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Danielle’s Conventions !
HIGHLY SKILLED HERO: The President of the United States.
DEMAND FOR ACTION: He has been forced to sign a document for starting a war in a friendly country after being drugged with a timing poison.
MISSION: Avoid the delivering of the document he has been forced to sign before the timing poison takes effect.
ANTAGONIST: The secret agents of the belligerent country.
ESCALATING ACTION: He has to hide the truth to his family ,collaborators and even outwit his bodyguards’ s watch.
What I learned doing this assignement is transforming a conventional situation into an extraordinary one.
Thank you for that Hal !
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Danielle LEGRAND
I agree to the confidential agreement release form
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Hi, everybody !
😃 I’m Danielle from France and I am very excited to start the class with you.
Until now I have written 4 or 5 small scripts with High school students but nothing professional.
I hope to get real good skills to write for featur films or T.V.
I am a retired teacher but I feel like I am only 20 when it comes to create a good killer action film !